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Speaker 1: This is let's be clear with Shannon Dorny. You, guys,

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Speaker 1: I'm joined by two really interesting guests, one of my

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Speaker 1: ex husbands, like how I have to say one of

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Speaker 1: them and I think the same amount as you, and

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Speaker 1: one of my stepdaughters. Hey, I mean this is pretty wild.

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Speaker 1: So Rick Solomon and his daughter Tyson are here.

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Speaker 2: Hi, what's happening?

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Speaker 1: What's happening? Some of you may be listening. You I

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Speaker 1: was married to Rick. I think we got married in

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Speaker 1: two thousand and two January. I just looked it up.

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Speaker 1: I would never have any idea otherwise. And we got

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Speaker 1: annulled in May of twenty twenty three. So technically we

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Speaker 1: don't have to call each other like ex wife and

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Speaker 1: ex husband because we got an old but we still do. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: and we got married super fast. Do you remember how

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Speaker 1: long we were dating before we got married?

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Speaker 2: Three weeks?

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Speaker 1: Was it only three weeks?

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Speaker 3: No?

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Speaker 1: It was longer than that. No way. I remember we

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Speaker 1: were in your car and we were at the Beverly

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Speaker 1: Connection that went across from the Beverly Center, and we

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Speaker 1: were having this conversation and the conversation ended with being like,

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Speaker 1: all right, let's go get married, like you know, we

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Speaker 1: had the conversation, and so we did and we went

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Speaker 1: to Vegas. Yeah, we went to Vegas and I had

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Speaker 1: a witness. You had a witness. And then I said

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Speaker 1: to you, like, I can't get married without my dad

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Speaker 1: being there and my mom. You're like, if we're going

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Speaker 1: to do this, we're going to do this right now.

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Speaker 1: It's like they were they were no, you gave me

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Speaker 1: like you were like they got to get on a

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Speaker 1: plane now, but they were definitely there. That was that

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Speaker 1: was wild? Like was it just normal for you? It

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Speaker 1: felt weird to me?

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Speaker 4: Well, I think even when he's doing when you are

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Speaker 4: like at the crops table, if they don't have the

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Speaker 4: money right then there he won't gamble. So I think

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Speaker 4: that for him, if it's not there happening, then there

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Speaker 4: he's like bad luck, right it has he done?

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Speaker 3: And I think like, well, my first marriage, their mom,

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Speaker 3: I think there was like I don't know she was

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Speaker 3: you wanted more of a companion, more like a husband,

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Speaker 3: more you know.

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Speaker 2: And just normal.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, it wasn't.

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Speaker 3: I didn't know anything about that, even though I had

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Speaker 3: been married before. All of a sudden, I was like

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Speaker 3: I just was like I didn't take marriage like okay, yeah,

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Speaker 3: we'll do it. We didn't met.

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Speaker 2: Just let the dice roll right.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, you know, e G is very that's your mom,

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Speaker 1: your first wife. She was awesome. She was really good

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Speaker 1: with me, like inviting me in and making me feel

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Speaker 1: welcome and making me feel welcome to like the kids

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Speaker 1: and you, and I never felt really threatened by her.

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Speaker 1: She was awesome. And she definitely from what I know

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Speaker 1: of that small period of time, give you a lot

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Speaker 1: of leeway. Yeah, And I was not the girl giving

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Speaker 1: me leeway.

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Speaker 3: Yeah.

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Speaker 2: Yeah.

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Speaker 3: But then also you were, like, in a different situations,

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Speaker 3: super famous in that fucking thousand where was it?

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Speaker 2: What's it called? The lemon farm was? What's what's no?

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Speaker 1: That was later when we first oh that.

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Speaker 3: Was the beginning we married, and then we were always

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Speaker 3: around the lemon farm and would know how I count

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Speaker 3: fifteen minutes from the store.

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Speaker 2: And I'm like looking around.

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Speaker 3: Like, uh, I can't live on no fucking lemon farm

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Speaker 3: in fifteen minutes from the store. That was so many,

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Speaker 3: so much, so much bruh. It was it was like

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Speaker 3: way past thousand oaks. It's like it's it was an hour.

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Speaker 2: And then it was like.

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Speaker 3: The thing I thought it has a real life lemon

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Speaker 3: farmers like twenty eight year lemon farm twenty.

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Speaker 5: She has lemons, she has a lot of lemons.

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Speaker 2: Go crazy.

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Speaker 1: Yeah that ways had we sold the like Sun Kissed,

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Speaker 1: but it was like more park seeming valley like out

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Speaker 1: in that sort of neighborhood. So for somebody who.

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Speaker 2: We didn't have lemonades, well for.

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Speaker 1: Somebody who was not used to like traditional marriage, yeah.

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Speaker 2: You know. But also I was hustling straight, you know

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Speaker 2: what I mean, just like young and Hu, you.

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Speaker 1: Weren't that young, dude. You were not that young, like

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Speaker 1: you were in your thirties.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm still like, that's not that young. I was

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Speaker 2: still on the street.

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Speaker 1: I know I should have married you. Now when you've

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Speaker 1: made it like that's I was stupid. I should have

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Speaker 1: just said, like, no, this guy's not done yet. He's

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Speaker 1: going to go back in the oven. We're going to

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Speaker 1: let you take some of I knowmy so and then

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Speaker 1: I don't know, like in your eyes, because I know

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Speaker 1: people think it's weird. I've had a lot of my

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Speaker 1: friends be like, wait, you're still friends with Rick, and

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Speaker 1: I'm like, yeah, like why wouldn't I be It may

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Speaker 1: have been tumultuous at times in our marriage, but at

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Speaker 1: the end of the day, I've like, I always loved you. You.

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Speaker 1: You always made me laugh, you always made me smile.

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Speaker 1: Sometimes you made me cry, but that's only when you

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Speaker 1: didn't come home because you were off doing other stuff.

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Speaker 1: Not cheating or any of that stuff, but other stuff,

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Speaker 1: which you'll you can tell your story if you want.

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Speaker 1: I'll tell you. I remember a distinct night from me

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Speaker 1: was my friend Debora and her husband Craig were over.

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Speaker 1: Do you remember this night? And they were going to

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Speaker 1: spend the weekend. He's like, no, I don't remember most

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Speaker 1: of that.

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Speaker 2: Best friends, you remember that night?

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Speaker 1: Remember the other house in Malibu that I had, so

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Speaker 1: we moved in it. We moved in there, right, and

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Speaker 1: that's the house, you know. So we moved in there

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Speaker 1: and they came over and there was supposed to be

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Speaker 1: like a whole you know, like weekend thing. They were

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Speaker 1: spending the weekend with us. And then you looked at

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Speaker 1: me and you're like, I'm going to vas going to

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Speaker 1: Vedans And I was like what And You're like I'm

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Speaker 1: going And I was like no, like you can't like

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Speaker 1: and I was so hurt. And you went to the

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Speaker 1: airport and I was in the bedroom, Deb and Craig

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Speaker 1: were in the pool. It was late at night, and

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Speaker 1: he comes walking back and it was the last thing

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Speaker 1: I expected him to do. But you were like, all right,

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Speaker 1: I'm stand And I was like, see, he's got like

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Speaker 1: you've always had, just like the sweetest, kindest heart. I've

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Speaker 1: always felt I came back. You did. He came back.

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Speaker 5: You know.

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Speaker 1: There are other times that you didn't, but this time

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Speaker 1: you did. And I think that I don't know. I

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Speaker 1: always felt like, regardless of what happened with you and me,

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Speaker 1: that I had somebody in my corner that I could

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Speaker 1: call you and be like, hey, I'm in trouble, or

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Speaker 1: I need you to bail me out of jail, or

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Speaker 1: I need you to do this, and you would do it.

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Speaker 5: He's good at like showing up when the time matters.

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Speaker 4: He's also good at giving like a one when like

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Speaker 4: you're I know a lot of people that could feel

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Speaker 4: really like lost or depressed or hopeless or something, and

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Speaker 4: in a lot of times he's like not the right

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Speaker 4: person to talk to you.

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Speaker 5: But sometimes when you're really down under, he has got like.

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Speaker 4: A one liner thing that you're like, oh wow, my

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Speaker 4: whole perspective could have like changed, and he's got that,

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Speaker 4: so you can show up and he's got good like

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Speaker 4: one liners.

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Speaker 2: She told me the.

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Speaker 3: Story the other day that she broke up with her

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Speaker 3: boyfriend and she's like devastated, and I was like, oh,

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Speaker 3: how exciting.

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Speaker 2: You know it's gonna be next Then she was like,

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Speaker 2: how exciting? How exciting? You don't know who you're going

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Speaker 2: to get the meeting?

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Speaker 1: I know a mile of Like my life looks like

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Speaker 1: I'm gonna.

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Speaker 4: Go to Vegas gamble and I hang with my dogs.

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Speaker 5: He's like, you know what your life's gonna look like?

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Speaker 5: How exciting? What adventure. I was like, that's a good perspective.

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Speaker 1: That is a good perspective. Yeah. Well, also, by the way,

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Speaker 1: I look at you like you're not gonna have any

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Speaker 1: trouble finding a boyfriend. You're gorgeous and I cannot take

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Speaker 1: credit for any of that because you're not biologically my kid.

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Speaker 1: I wish I could take credit for it.

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Speaker 5: I look like you.

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Speaker 3: Did.

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Speaker 1: I know, right, We've got a little coloring, same coloring. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: so okay, we got divorce because you had a little

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Speaker 1: bit of a drug thing back then.

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Speaker 3: I always think I think that myself and like the

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Speaker 3: girls always wanted the bad boy until they met me, like,

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Speaker 3: oh he's too bad.

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Speaker 2: And that was that was That was the way it was.

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Speaker 2: That it always like fall in love and then I'd

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Speaker 2: just be too wild.

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Speaker 1: You know, because back then he would fall in and

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Speaker 1: out of it. Now you're like fifteen years sober, right, so,

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Speaker 1: but back then he wasn't, and he would go on,

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Speaker 1: you know, maybe I'll be sober for three weeks or

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Speaker 1: four weeks or six months.

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Speaker 2: So I was like, I want to try to start

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Speaker 2: getting somewhere. I was eighteen years old.

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Speaker 3: I didn't get long term surprise until I'm forty fifty

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Speaker 3: five now.

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Speaker 2: So but in those.

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Speaker 3: Twenty two years, I tried to get sober. I got

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Speaker 3: sober seven times a year, you know. So they're like

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Speaker 3: I would get like, you know, clean up, go to

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Speaker 3: the champ.

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Speaker 1: And I think being sober it actually made him a

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Speaker 1: little introverted, which is like back then obviously not now

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Speaker 1: you're clearly not introverted, but like back then it would.

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Speaker 1: So there was this like shyness and a charm. Yeah

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Speaker 1: yeah him that made someone like me fall in love

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Speaker 1: with him. Yeah yeah, yeah.

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Speaker 4: He is still shy though, because he is still like

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Speaker 4: the guy at the party that kind of just wants

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Speaker 4: to go home, or like I think there is like

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Speaker 4: a wholesomeness about him where he's like I liked going

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Speaker 4: to walk, so I liked being with my dogs.

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Speaker 5: I like to be at home. He is like awkward

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Speaker 5: when he is sober.

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Speaker 2: Comfort Yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm.

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Speaker 1: So glad you're comfortable right now. But so we what

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Speaker 1: ended up happening is he obviously didn't stay sober, and

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Speaker 1: then like it just started spiraling, and eventually things happened

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Speaker 1: that I sadly was like, I can't, like, I can't

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Speaker 1: do this anymore, Like I I because I did really

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Speaker 1: want to be married. I wanted to be married to you.

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Speaker 1: I wanted it to work out, but I had to

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Speaker 1: it wasn't going to work out because he needed to

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Speaker 1: go through a lot more stuff, I think, and and

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Speaker 1: find his true sobriety, which you've done. And you know,

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Speaker 1: I think it's probably been amazing for you and your sister,

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Speaker 1: just how better you are showing up for people in

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Speaker 1: your life, even though you were always fairly good at that,

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Speaker 1: at least for me you were. I was just drug

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Speaker 1: right to what what was like the catalyst and what

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Speaker 1: what happened where you got sober? You don't have to

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Speaker 1: say it if you don't want to see everything.

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Speaker 2: My whole life fell apart, like every every everything.

223
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Speaker 5: His brain stopped working the safe.

224
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Speaker 2: Yea, oh yeah, well that was the thing I said.

225
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Speaker 3: Okay, I heard if you go to rehab for a month,

226
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Speaker 3: you and I went a couple of times, you have

227
00:10:33,000 --> 00:10:35,160
Speaker 3: a three percent chance of stand so sober, and you

228
00:10:35,200 --> 00:10:36,839
Speaker 3: go for a year, you have an eighty five percent

229
00:10:36,920 --> 00:10:40,200
Speaker 3: chances stands over. And I would say, if I ever

230
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Speaker 3: smoke crack, okay, and again, I'm gonna fucking go to

231
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Speaker 3: rehab for a year. And then I couldn't remember my

232
00:10:45,200 --> 00:10:46,760
Speaker 3: safe code that were going in all the time, and

233
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Speaker 3: I'm a numbers guy, and I was.

234
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Speaker 2: Like, for some reason, I was like, dude, my whole

235
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Speaker 2: life was falling apart.

236
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Speaker 3: They were going to Australia without me. My passport was

237
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Speaker 3: in the safe that I couldn't get in there. We're

238
00:10:55,400 --> 00:10:57,240
Speaker 3: leaving that night. I'm a fucking mess, and I just

239
00:10:57,280 --> 00:11:00,160
Speaker 3: remember thinking that fucking you promise you were gonna go

240
00:11:00,280 --> 00:11:02,520
Speaker 3: fucking you know, if you smoke this shit again. I'd

241
00:11:02,559 --> 00:11:04,240
Speaker 3: been smoking for eight months ago. I was like one

242
00:11:04,320 --> 00:11:05,760
Speaker 3: hundred and fifty pounds.

243
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Speaker 5: Flowed.

244
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Speaker 2: I had like seven million dollars in my box. I'd

245
00:11:10,720 --> 00:11:12,600
Speaker 2: lost like eight million, you know what I mean.

246
00:11:12,800 --> 00:11:15,000
Speaker 3: Like I was like, you know what they're like, figure

247
00:11:15,000 --> 00:11:16,600
Speaker 3: out how to pay for rehab for a year.

248
00:11:16,760 --> 00:11:18,240
Speaker 2: I had to pay for my kids for a year,

249
00:11:18,440 --> 00:11:19,520
Speaker 2: had to pay for you know.

250
00:11:19,600 --> 00:11:22,920
Speaker 3: Some debts, my house, everything, my assistant, everything, you know

251
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Speaker 3: what I mean, going into rehab with like fucking.

252
00:11:25,120 --> 00:11:28,200
Speaker 2: Being a million dollars uh in debt and then yeah,

253
00:11:28,360 --> 00:11:29,960
Speaker 2: everything just fell fucking part.

254
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Speaker 3: Even when I was in rehab, She's telling me she's

255
00:11:32,200 --> 00:11:34,320
Speaker 3: walking around rehab going and I was in I was

256
00:11:34,320 --> 00:11:36,000
Speaker 3: in austral I did make it to Australia, by the

257
00:11:36,000 --> 00:11:38,160
Speaker 3: way they drilled them on the fucking safe And I

258
00:11:38,240 --> 00:11:40,599
Speaker 3: was in Australia walking around one hundred and fifty and

259
00:11:40,640 --> 00:11:43,160
Speaker 3: they don't have real cocaine in Australia. It's like everybody

260
00:11:43,200 --> 00:11:45,480
Speaker 3: does it. It's three hundred dollars a gram. I bought

261
00:11:45,520 --> 00:11:48,080
Speaker 3: a hundred bags. Fucking none of it was fucking worth,

262
00:11:48,120 --> 00:11:49,800
Speaker 3: you know. And I mean the thing I was eating

263
00:11:49,840 --> 00:11:52,640
Speaker 3: like twenty hits Actasy a day like a zombie.

264
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Speaker 2: Finally get me the fuck back that I was supposed

265
00:11:54,720 --> 00:11:56,320
Speaker 2: to play at poker tournament there. I didn't play.

266
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Speaker 3: I was like, get me back to America from real cocaine.

267
00:11:58,760 --> 00:12:01,440
Speaker 3: I come back, go on, like you know it's supposed

268
00:12:01,440 --> 00:12:05,040
Speaker 3: to go for two day things. Fucking two days. I'm

269
00:12:05,040 --> 00:12:07,160
Speaker 3: supposed to read by, show up by like two weeks later.

270
00:12:07,720 --> 00:12:10,520
Speaker 3: So old, but even in rehab, so scared. She's walk

271
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Speaker 3: around daddy going, if you don't quit smoking cigarettes, you're

272
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Speaker 3: not gonna grow old and get to meet my fucking kids.

273
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Speaker 2: You know, I'm gonna rehab ten days. I started coughing blood,

274
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Speaker 2: chunks of blood.

275
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Speaker 4: His mom died before I was born, so I thought,

276
00:12:21,480 --> 00:12:24,280
Speaker 4: so I think that was definitely like for him, like, oh, Mike,

277
00:12:24,400 --> 00:12:25,720
Speaker 4: mom didn't get to meet my kids.

278
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Speaker 5: I'm not going to get to meet my kids.

279
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Speaker 3: Kids, and uh so I'm coughing up this fucking blood

280
00:12:31,040 --> 00:12:32,880
Speaker 3: and uh I would like a couple of years before

281
00:12:32,880 --> 00:12:35,280
Speaker 3: I went to this wellness center, like they did these

282
00:12:35,280 --> 00:12:37,480
Speaker 3: full hey long X rays, and I remember, you know,

283
00:12:37,600 --> 00:12:39,920
Speaker 3: I better go do this lung scam. I go do

284
00:12:40,000 --> 00:12:43,839
Speaker 3: the fucking lung scan. The nurse turns white. I mean

285
00:12:44,320 --> 00:12:47,040
Speaker 3: it looked like she saw the ghosts. You know, I'm like, well,

286
00:12:47,040 --> 00:12:48,520
Speaker 3: I read people for a living, you know what I mean.

287
00:12:48,640 --> 00:12:51,160
Speaker 3: Sometimes it's called the bat read. And you know, I'm like,

288
00:12:51,240 --> 00:12:53,880
Speaker 3: I hope this is a bad read. The doctor comes in,

289
00:12:54,000 --> 00:12:56,680
Speaker 3: he's like, you got a golf ball sized tumor and

290
00:12:56,720 --> 00:12:59,320
Speaker 3: you're in your lungs. You gotta go to surgery right now,

291
00:12:59,400 --> 00:13:00,880
Speaker 3: you know what I mean. And then I was like,

292
00:13:00,960 --> 00:13:03,599
Speaker 3: it's Friday afternoon, there's a lot of traffic. Sure, we

293
00:13:03,640 --> 00:13:06,920
Speaker 3: don't have no options. And he starts like pushing buttons.

294
00:13:06,960 --> 00:13:09,079
Speaker 2: He's like, you're a gambling man. You're a gambling man.

295
00:13:09,160 --> 00:13:11,360
Speaker 3: There's a ten percent chance that fucking you just have

296
00:13:11,400 --> 00:13:14,560
Speaker 3: an abscess. But now we won't know till Monday. But

297
00:13:14,640 --> 00:13:16,040
Speaker 3: he was telling me ten minutes before I had to

298
00:13:16,080 --> 00:13:18,200
Speaker 3: go to surgery right down, and every second counts would

299
00:13:18,240 --> 00:13:20,120
Speaker 3: I go? But I was happy I had a ten

300
00:13:20,160 --> 00:13:22,400
Speaker 3: percent chance. I'm like, I've beaten worse odds. I was like,

301
00:13:22,440 --> 00:13:25,240
Speaker 3: pretty cool, I got a ten percent chance. So you know,

302
00:13:25,480 --> 00:13:26,920
Speaker 3: I'm just comfortable with death.

303
00:13:26,960 --> 00:13:27,120
Speaker 5: You know.

304
00:13:27,360 --> 00:13:29,600
Speaker 3: I thought about it and the thing, I'm like, die,

305
00:13:29,760 --> 00:13:33,400
Speaker 3: I sleep, It's not that bad, right, And but I

306
00:13:33,440 --> 00:13:35,559
Speaker 3: wasn't that comfortable telling her. I was like, fuck, I

307
00:13:35,600 --> 00:13:37,640
Speaker 3: to tell this little girl that fucking your dad fucked up,

308
00:13:37,679 --> 00:13:40,240
Speaker 3: did too many drugs and smokes Cita reds and I'm

309
00:13:40,280 --> 00:13:45,080
Speaker 3: dying lung cancer. So Monday I go do fucking more tests.

310
00:13:45,320 --> 00:13:48,040
Speaker 3: It's Monday afternoon. The doctor still doesn't tell me fucking anything.

311
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Speaker 2: I call him.

312
00:13:48,400 --> 00:13:49,760
Speaker 3: I'm like, yo, homies, what the fuck do I got?

313
00:13:49,800 --> 00:13:51,880
Speaker 3: You told me every second counts. He goes, give me

314
00:13:51,920 --> 00:13:54,520
Speaker 3: fifteen minutes. Give me fifteen minutes. By the way, Now

315
00:13:54,559 --> 00:13:57,320
Speaker 3: I got figured out who's gonna do my lung surgery.

316
00:13:57,520 --> 00:13:59,120
Speaker 3: So it was over that weekend. I had to fight

317
00:13:59,200 --> 00:14:01,160
Speaker 3: find a doctor. I do all the shit like, I'm like,

318
00:14:01,160 --> 00:14:03,360
Speaker 3: I got problems. Now I gottaigure out who's the surgeon

319
00:14:03,400 --> 00:14:05,160
Speaker 3: to do the shit. I never did that before, so

320
00:14:05,559 --> 00:14:08,200
Speaker 3: no one's taking care of me. And uh I figured

321
00:14:08,480 --> 00:14:10,760
Speaker 3: that all out, and he calls me back fifteen minutes later.

322
00:14:10,760 --> 00:14:13,280
Speaker 3: He says, you got a fucking tumor. It's lighting up

323
00:14:13,280 --> 00:14:15,480
Speaker 3: to your lymph notes you gotta go to surgery right now.

324
00:14:16,200 --> 00:14:16,480
Speaker 2: Wait?

325
00:14:16,480 --> 00:14:17,760
Speaker 1: Wait year was this?

326
00:14:17,760 --> 00:14:19,320
Speaker 2: This is exactly fifteen years ago.

327
00:14:19,480 --> 00:14:23,800
Speaker 3: So fucking Sistem falls over crying. I'm like, I'm like, yo, dude,

328
00:14:23,920 --> 00:14:26,280
Speaker 3: fuck it, I'm cool. I can make it to the hospital.

329
00:14:26,320 --> 00:14:28,120
Speaker 3: I know, people freak out on Zone's dying, you know

330
00:14:28,160 --> 00:14:29,600
Speaker 3: what I mean, Like, I don't like, you know, people

331
00:14:29,640 --> 00:14:31,400
Speaker 3: freak the fuck it's cool, And he Alway.

332
00:14:31,160 --> 00:14:33,240
Speaker 5: Says, you don't call me. You were times to be like, Hey,

333
00:14:33,320 --> 00:14:34,840
Speaker 5: if I die, I want you to be happy.

334
00:14:35,400 --> 00:14:37,640
Speaker 4: I'm like, huh, well call me and around to day

335
00:14:37,640 --> 00:14:39,080
Speaker 4: and be like we all die in a plane cross

336
00:14:39,080 --> 00:14:40,080
Speaker 4: Where do you want the money go away?

337
00:14:40,200 --> 00:14:43,400
Speaker 1: Huh? Why are you doing this to me? It's ten o'clock.

338
00:14:43,640 --> 00:14:45,760
Speaker 3: I mean, nobody wants somebody to die, and for you

339
00:14:45,840 --> 00:14:47,440
Speaker 3: know you, I love you, but I want you to

340
00:14:47,720 --> 00:14:50,720
Speaker 3: be happy. And if you live forever, everybody's gonna fucking die.

341
00:14:50,720 --> 00:14:52,240
Speaker 3: If you're one hundred years old, every one of your

342
00:14:52,280 --> 00:14:54,440
Speaker 3: motherfucking friends die, you know what I mean. So they're

343
00:14:54,440 --> 00:14:56,120
Speaker 3: just like, hey, you gotta just like this is your

344
00:14:56,160 --> 00:14:58,000
Speaker 3: story and you gotta be thankful. Hopefully you can find

345
00:14:58,040 --> 00:14:59,600
Speaker 3: some new friends because.

346
00:14:59,400 --> 00:15:04,600
Speaker 1: There, you know, I just wear it like, okay, die,

347
00:15:04,800 --> 00:15:06,040
Speaker 1: I gotta be happy.

348
00:15:06,000 --> 00:15:06,960
Speaker 2: So fucking whatever.

349
00:15:07,040 --> 00:15:08,800
Speaker 3: I go to the fucking you know right there, we

350
00:15:08,920 --> 00:15:11,720
Speaker 3: go to fucking Cedars emergency, go do surgery for my ship.

351
00:15:11,920 --> 00:15:15,360
Speaker 3: And you know, I get there and the doctor looks

352
00:15:15,400 --> 00:15:17,440
Speaker 3: at it and goes, you don't fucking have a tumor,

353
00:15:17,480 --> 00:15:19,080
Speaker 3: and if you do, it ain't lighting up to your

354
00:15:19,080 --> 00:15:21,480
Speaker 3: olymp notes, and fucking said the complete opposite. I was

355
00:15:21,520 --> 00:15:23,560
Speaker 3: going in the surgery, like in the thing, they did

356
00:15:23,640 --> 00:15:25,520
Speaker 3: a biopsy and it was just a chunk of crack

357
00:15:25,560 --> 00:15:28,440
Speaker 3: cocaine stealing my fucking lungs. You know, I've been smoking

358
00:15:28,480 --> 00:15:31,280
Speaker 3: an ounce a day for like for five months.

359
00:15:32,720 --> 00:15:33,360
Speaker 2: To my chest.

360
00:15:34,880 --> 00:15:40,960
Speaker 1: A chunk cocaine stuck in your that is nuts.

361
00:15:50,720 --> 00:15:50,880
Speaker 5: You know.

362
00:15:51,000 --> 00:15:54,200
Speaker 3: My mom died a brutal, brutal, brutal cancer cancer death

363
00:15:54,520 --> 00:15:57,880
Speaker 3: when I was eleven years old, and I just didn't

364
00:15:57,880 --> 00:15:59,360
Speaker 3: believe in God, you know what I mean. I was

365
00:15:59,360 --> 00:16:01,760
Speaker 3: just like, Wow, that lady, the nicest lady I ever knew,

366
00:16:01,840 --> 00:16:03,320
Speaker 3: fucking died the most brutal death.

367
00:16:03,960 --> 00:16:06,800
Speaker 2: And so I just was like in the thing.

368
00:16:06,840 --> 00:16:08,920
Speaker 3: When that I met this dude in rehab and he

369
00:16:09,040 --> 00:16:11,360
Speaker 3: was like, Rick, I thought I smoked crack coaking every

370
00:16:11,400 --> 00:16:11,800
Speaker 3: single day.

371
00:16:11,800 --> 00:16:12,440
Speaker 2: I thought I was gone.

372
00:16:12,480 --> 00:16:14,000
Speaker 3: I was like telling the kids that I had it

373
00:16:14,000 --> 00:16:16,320
Speaker 3: in my thing, that your dadd's cracking. That's just the

374
00:16:16,360 --> 00:16:17,520
Speaker 3: way it is, you know what I mean. I get

375
00:16:17,640 --> 00:16:19,200
Speaker 3: used to it. I ain't hiding my pipe no more,

376
00:16:19,440 --> 00:16:21,920
Speaker 3: you know what, And then she was, oh, on Christmas Day,

377
00:16:22,000 --> 00:16:25,280
Speaker 3: the poor little girl caught me, like, fucking God, Daddy's

378
00:16:25,280 --> 00:16:28,520
Speaker 3: smoking poison. Daddy's smoking poisoning because I went on. You know, man,

379
00:16:28,640 --> 00:16:30,800
Speaker 3: she called me fucking smoking cracker on Christmas Day and.

380
00:16:30,960 --> 00:16:32,560
Speaker 2: You know I was in their next room smoking crack.

381
00:16:32,760 --> 00:16:36,360
Speaker 2: So it's just it was just all around bad. What

382
00:16:36,480 --> 00:16:39,840
Speaker 2: was I talking about before the daddy smoking? Oh? The

383
00:16:39,920 --> 00:16:41,360
Speaker 2: God the most important.

384
00:16:40,960 --> 00:16:43,800
Speaker 3: Thing, right, So the dude just told me, I thought

385
00:16:43,880 --> 00:16:45,840
Speaker 3: crackhoa game was going to be myself forever for the

386
00:16:45,880 --> 00:16:47,160
Speaker 3: rest of my life, you know what I mean.

387
00:16:47,160 --> 00:16:49,080
Speaker 2: I always always think about it, and that was it.

388
00:16:49,600 --> 00:16:51,200
Speaker 2: So the dude just told me pray.

389
00:16:51,440 --> 00:16:54,000
Speaker 3: He goes pray for the obsession every morning for the

390
00:16:54,080 --> 00:16:57,080
Speaker 3: Please Dear God, Ronnie, please dear God, you know, remove

391
00:16:57,160 --> 00:16:57,640
Speaker 3: the obsession.

392
00:16:57,640 --> 00:16:59,200
Speaker 2: I don't want to do any drugs or alcohol anymore.

393
00:16:59,200 --> 00:16:59,960
Speaker 2: They ruined my life.

394
00:17:00,280 --> 00:17:02,720
Speaker 3: I also played there got do your will not mine

395
00:17:02,920 --> 00:17:05,239
Speaker 3: mine always gets me in trouble. Please Dear God, help

396
00:17:05,280 --> 00:17:07,560
Speaker 3: me stay sober today, you know, and do it every

397
00:17:07,560 --> 00:17:09,960
Speaker 3: single morning and then do my little meditation pray for people.

398
00:17:10,000 --> 00:17:12,360
Speaker 2: And I've been doing fifteen years and it worked.

399
00:17:12,160 --> 00:17:13,639
Speaker 3: And he said, I don't know if it's gonna take

400
00:17:13,680 --> 00:17:15,800
Speaker 3: a day or a month or two months, but I

401
00:17:15,920 --> 00:17:18,240
Speaker 3: promised that obsession is going to be removed. And I

402
00:17:18,400 --> 00:17:20,760
Speaker 3: was just willing. And that was that's just, you know,

403
00:17:21,080 --> 00:17:23,080
Speaker 3: just like everybody just talks about it, did I just

404
00:17:23,280 --> 00:17:25,480
Speaker 3: I didn't know. I didn't know the answer. Like my dude,

405
00:17:25,680 --> 00:17:26,119
Speaker 3: I didn't know.

406
00:17:26,280 --> 00:17:27,240
Speaker 2: How to stay off drugs.

407
00:17:27,520 --> 00:17:29,239
Speaker 3: I know how to stay off drugs for a little bit,

408
00:17:29,840 --> 00:17:31,560
Speaker 3: but I knew and I also knew I couldn't do

409
00:17:31,680 --> 00:17:35,080
Speaker 3: drugs anymore, like my brain, Like there's also that's a

410
00:17:35,119 --> 00:17:38,320
Speaker 3: whole other story. But I lost my mind and rehab sober,

411
00:17:38,400 --> 00:17:39,560
Speaker 3: you know what I mean. So I was like three

412
00:17:39,640 --> 00:17:41,680
Speaker 3: days from sleep deprivation, you know what I mean. I

413
00:17:41,800 --> 00:17:43,600
Speaker 3: was like fucking gone, you know.

414
00:17:43,760 --> 00:17:46,960
Speaker 1: And was that just from like the detoxing I.

415
00:17:46,960 --> 00:17:48,240
Speaker 2: Didn't sleep from you know what I mean?

416
00:17:48,240 --> 00:17:50,560
Speaker 3: I was like, I don't stay for a week, sleep

417
00:17:50,640 --> 00:17:52,080
Speaker 3: for half a day, stay for a week, you know,

418
00:17:52,119 --> 00:17:53,920
Speaker 3: one hundred. So all of a sudden, I'm in rehab

419
00:17:54,000 --> 00:17:55,399
Speaker 3: and I can't sleep, and they're trying to give me

420
00:17:55,440 --> 00:17:57,840
Speaker 3: sleep meds and I'm like sleep mads means I'm gonna

421
00:17:57,840 --> 00:17:59,320
Speaker 3: get me some cocaine, you know what I mean.

422
00:17:59,520 --> 00:18:00,560
Speaker 2: I'm like the dude on the.

423
00:18:00,560 --> 00:18:02,000
Speaker 3: Street and I'm just call them up. They're gonna come

424
00:18:02,000 --> 00:18:03,720
Speaker 3: pick me up. Like I'm getting picked up, getting the

425
00:18:03,760 --> 00:18:04,919
Speaker 3: fuck out of here drugs.

426
00:18:04,960 --> 00:18:07,800
Speaker 2: I came here to get off drugs. I can't drugs.

427
00:18:07,840 --> 00:18:10,119
Speaker 2: I mix them going down, I'm coming up, you know.

428
00:18:10,560 --> 00:18:12,240
Speaker 3: So. And then I found in the book like no

429
00:18:12,320 --> 00:18:15,600
Speaker 3: alcoholic or a drugic whoever dive from sleep devas and adventure,

430
00:18:15,640 --> 00:18:16,320
Speaker 3: they just got to suffer.

431
00:18:16,359 --> 00:18:17,119
Speaker 2: Eventually they're going to.

432
00:18:17,160 --> 00:18:19,639
Speaker 3: Sleep and I'm showing them. But these motherfucking rehabs just

433
00:18:19,680 --> 00:18:21,560
Speaker 3: trying to give everybody drugs, you know what I mean.

434
00:18:21,640 --> 00:18:23,399
Speaker 3: I wouldn't have found God if I took the drugs.

435
00:18:23,440 --> 00:18:26,679
Speaker 3: So then I was like having these crazy fucking dreams.

436
00:18:26,680 --> 00:18:29,440
Speaker 3: I'm sweating thing and the place that promise is turned

437
00:18:29,480 --> 00:18:32,320
Speaker 3: into fucking I call like nightmare on Elm Street. Demons

438
00:18:32,400 --> 00:18:35,320
Speaker 3: and shit chasing after me, you know what, Like the

439
00:18:35,440 --> 00:18:36,879
Speaker 3: demons were chasing after me.

440
00:18:37,280 --> 00:18:39,240
Speaker 2: I was sweating my fucking brains out.

441
00:18:39,480 --> 00:18:41,239
Speaker 3: All of a sudden, I had a roommate and then

442
00:18:41,280 --> 00:18:42,960
Speaker 3: we had there's a bathroom, and then there was two

443
00:18:43,000 --> 00:18:44,520
Speaker 3: other dudes over there, and this one dude got his

444
00:18:44,640 --> 00:18:46,919
Speaker 3: face kicked in and he was like going to surgery

445
00:18:46,960 --> 00:18:50,119
Speaker 3: the next day, and he was like, please please please.

446
00:18:50,080 --> 00:18:51,160
Speaker 2: Be quieting in my face.

447
00:18:51,240 --> 00:18:53,280
Speaker 3: I have a real big bad I'm getting surgery where

448
00:18:53,280 --> 00:18:54,560
Speaker 3: I can't have the worst headache in the world.

449
00:18:54,600 --> 00:18:56,880
Speaker 2: Everybody, please please be quiet. So all of a sudden,

450
00:18:56,880 --> 00:18:59,679
Speaker 2: this one dude opens the door and he's like, where's

451
00:18:59,720 --> 00:19:02,119
Speaker 2: my pipe? And the guy's like, I left it in

452
00:19:02,200 --> 00:19:03,639
Speaker 2: the main house, right, And.

453
00:19:03,680 --> 00:19:05,480
Speaker 3: Then all of a sudden, fucking the guy slams the

454
00:19:05,520 --> 00:19:07,119
Speaker 3: door so out and then all of a sudden, I

455
00:19:07,200 --> 00:19:09,120
Speaker 3: know there's gonna be a fight because this guy asked

456
00:19:09,119 --> 00:19:11,040
Speaker 3: to be fucking real quiet and you slammed the door

457
00:19:11,200 --> 00:19:13,159
Speaker 3: like so loud, and all of a sudden, I'm like pipe,

458
00:19:13,680 --> 00:19:16,000
Speaker 3: you know who's fighting over the pipe? On Nightmare and

459
00:19:16,040 --> 00:19:18,159
Speaker 3: Elm Street night You know what I mean, there's demons

460
00:19:18,240 --> 00:19:20,119
Speaker 3: chasing me. And then all of a sudden'm getting in

461
00:19:20,359 --> 00:19:22,720
Speaker 3: the little dude, My little roommate's like eighteen years old.

462
00:19:22,960 --> 00:19:25,119
Speaker 2: He never left his house. He's in plumb rich kid,

463
00:19:25,200 --> 00:19:26,720
Speaker 2: but somehow shooting heroin, you know what I mean. I

464
00:19:26,760 --> 00:19:28,639
Speaker 2: don't even know how we found heroin what the deal is?

465
00:19:28,760 --> 00:19:30,760
Speaker 2: And he screamed me rigged? What should we do? What

466
00:19:31,000 --> 00:19:31,119
Speaker 2: we do?

467
00:19:31,200 --> 00:19:32,639
Speaker 3: And then I'm like, yo, dude, like you know what

468
00:19:32,680 --> 00:19:35,080
Speaker 3: I mean, Like like you know, demons, no demons, you

469
00:19:35,119 --> 00:19:36,320
Speaker 3: gotta see what the fuck's going on.

470
00:19:36,680 --> 00:19:37,720
Speaker 2: So I opened the door.

471
00:19:38,200 --> 00:19:40,639
Speaker 3: Rick, Rick, the dude just fighting, the dude, just fighting.

472
00:19:41,000 --> 00:19:43,480
Speaker 3: They say, a power greater than you will restore you

473
00:19:43,640 --> 00:19:47,040
Speaker 3: to fucking sanity. I snapped out on my fucking psychosis.

474
00:19:47,240 --> 00:19:49,560
Speaker 3: I went outside, I smoked a cigarette and when came

475
00:19:49,600 --> 00:19:51,199
Speaker 3: back and I slept like a baby. And I've been

476
00:19:51,280 --> 00:19:53,520
Speaker 3: sane and sin since ever since then. And I'm telling

477
00:19:53,520 --> 00:19:55,440
Speaker 3: you one thing, death is a peaceful Remember I told

478
00:19:55,440 --> 00:19:57,440
Speaker 3: you I ain't scared of death. I'll fucking lie the

479
00:19:57,520 --> 00:20:00,639
Speaker 3: fuck down. But being insane, that's all different, you know

480
00:20:00,680 --> 00:20:02,399
Speaker 3: what I mean. I had a couple of bad trips

481
00:20:02,440 --> 00:20:04,399
Speaker 3: before a fucker be in that bad trip for the

482
00:20:04,440 --> 00:20:06,600
Speaker 3: rest of your life, ain't fucking It's like I can't

483
00:20:06,640 --> 00:20:06,919
Speaker 3: deal it.

484
00:20:07,280 --> 00:20:09,720
Speaker 2: Right, Like that's too much for me. Like what do

485
00:20:09,800 --> 00:20:11,640
Speaker 2: I got to do? How do I stay sober? I'm

486
00:20:11,680 --> 00:20:13,000
Speaker 2: gonna do it. And if you told me to walk

487
00:20:13,080 --> 00:20:13,560
Speaker 2: fucking all the.

488
00:20:13,560 --> 00:20:16,600
Speaker 3: Way to point doom back every morning, because sisamn, that's

489
00:20:16,640 --> 00:20:17,520
Speaker 3: what you do to stay sober.

490
00:20:17,560 --> 00:20:19,920
Speaker 2: I was gonna try it. I wouldn't say I continue

491
00:20:19,960 --> 00:20:22,119
Speaker 2: to do it, but I was just willing to try it.

492
00:20:22,840 --> 00:20:23,800
Speaker 2: I just that's it.

493
00:20:24,440 --> 00:20:27,320
Speaker 1: And so that that like finding God and saying that prayer.

494
00:20:27,440 --> 00:20:31,320
Speaker 1: Do you really attribute a lot of that to keeping

495
00:20:31,359 --> 00:20:32,600
Speaker 1: you sober for fifteen years?

496
00:20:33,160 --> 00:20:34,920
Speaker 3: I don't know what happens if I didn't. What I

497
00:20:35,000 --> 00:20:37,159
Speaker 3: attribute to sober is me being willing to do it.

498
00:20:37,280 --> 00:20:39,120
Speaker 3: I did find God and he has come and showed

499
00:20:39,160 --> 00:20:39,440
Speaker 3: up for me.

500
00:20:39,560 --> 00:20:40,840
Speaker 2: But I've been doing it. I don't know what my

501
00:20:40,920 --> 00:20:42,159
Speaker 2: life would be like if I didn't do it.

502
00:20:42,320 --> 00:20:44,080
Speaker 3: But I had to be told this is what we do.

503
00:20:45,119 --> 00:20:47,960
Speaker 3: This is what we do, homie, and guess what. And

504
00:20:48,119 --> 00:20:49,920
Speaker 3: I did it at worked and I just keep doing it.

505
00:20:50,440 --> 00:20:54,399
Speaker 1: Obviously we weren't married for a super long time, but like,

506
00:20:54,520 --> 00:20:57,320
Speaker 1: I know what you were like, and so does you

507
00:20:57,400 --> 00:21:01,639
Speaker 1: know Tyson and Hunter and he and a bunch of us.

508
00:21:02,359 --> 00:21:04,800
Speaker 1: I honestly don't think that you would be here if

509
00:21:04,840 --> 00:21:08,520
Speaker 1: you hadn't gotten sober. You won the All Time Award

510
00:21:08,840 --> 00:21:13,280
Speaker 1: Trophy Metal for like, you know, drugs and the amount

511
00:21:13,359 --> 00:21:17,679
Speaker 1: that you could could Yeah, yeah, so wait, so tyson

512
00:21:17,760 --> 00:21:22,040
Speaker 1: you were because you're how old now twenty five and

513
00:21:23,720 --> 00:21:25,080
Speaker 1: you're sober now too?

514
00:21:25,320 --> 00:21:27,320
Speaker 5: Yeah, I got sober originally when I was fifteen. He

515
00:21:27,359 --> 00:21:28,119
Speaker 5: sent me to rehab.

516
00:21:28,520 --> 00:21:31,200
Speaker 4: I was in the opera a year, had a hard

517
00:21:31,400 --> 00:21:34,199
Speaker 4: year twenty twenty two. I think, like a little bit

518
00:21:34,200 --> 00:21:42,160
Speaker 4: after quarantine, went back out super like secretive, like relapsed

519
00:21:42,160 --> 00:21:44,760
Speaker 4: because I was sober for so long, sober for all

520
00:21:44,880 --> 00:21:45,359
Speaker 4: my teens.

521
00:21:45,400 --> 00:21:46,679
Speaker 5: Everyone that knew me knew I.

522
00:21:46,800 --> 00:21:49,480
Speaker 4: Was like the sober girl with the sober dad, doing

523
00:21:49,560 --> 00:21:52,920
Speaker 4: sober things, and there was like too much like well,

524
00:21:52,960 --> 00:21:55,520
Speaker 4: first off, like just a complete inability to be like

525
00:21:55,600 --> 00:21:57,320
Speaker 4: honest with myself with like oh no, I'm like a

526
00:21:57,400 --> 00:22:00,280
Speaker 4: full on like drug addicts again, but also just like

527
00:22:00,800 --> 00:22:03,160
Speaker 4: how do I go from being this person and having

528
00:22:03,240 --> 00:22:06,960
Speaker 4: this ego and this sense of like self like who

529
00:22:07,040 --> 00:22:08,760
Speaker 4: am I? To all of a sudden like I literally

530
00:22:08,800 --> 00:22:10,520
Speaker 4: don't know who I am and how am I back

531
00:22:10,560 --> 00:22:11,880
Speaker 4: to where I was when I was fifteen?

532
00:22:11,920 --> 00:22:12,920
Speaker 5: And how do I get out of this?

533
00:22:13,000 --> 00:22:14,600
Speaker 4: And I also don't know how and I don't really

534
00:22:14,640 --> 00:22:16,840
Speaker 4: know if I want to because I was sober for

535
00:22:16,920 --> 00:22:19,440
Speaker 4: a long time and it wasn't really helping me or

536
00:22:19,440 --> 00:22:21,680
Speaker 4: I don't feel like I got all the things that

537
00:22:21,800 --> 00:22:23,800
Speaker 4: you see some other people. He got sober, and he

538
00:22:23,920 --> 00:22:27,560
Speaker 4: got super like happy, successful, whatever, joyce, free, whatever you.

539
00:22:27,600 --> 00:22:28,159
Speaker 1: Want to call it.

540
00:22:28,240 --> 00:22:28,359
Speaker 3: You know.

541
00:22:29,240 --> 00:22:32,200
Speaker 4: So I think, then, you know, getting back again. My

542
00:22:32,280 --> 00:22:34,480
Speaker 4: whole life fall apart. Me and him weren't even talking,

543
00:22:35,760 --> 00:22:38,440
Speaker 4: just a total disaster. Didn't know who I wanted, what

544
00:22:38,560 --> 00:22:40,159
Speaker 4: I wanted to do, or who I wanted to be,

545
00:22:40,720 --> 00:22:43,960
Speaker 4: and then just my appendix burst on my way out

546
00:22:44,000 --> 00:22:44,199
Speaker 4: to do.

547
00:22:44,280 --> 00:22:46,000
Speaker 3: Like an no, you gotta talking about. So this is

548
00:22:46,000 --> 00:22:48,800
Speaker 3: a month of our's journeys. So she's doing ay Alaska

549
00:22:49,000 --> 00:22:50,159
Speaker 3: like that scares me.

550
00:22:50,440 --> 00:22:52,600
Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm pretty sure I would go in the journey

551
00:22:52,640 --> 00:22:53,320
Speaker 1: and never come back.

552
00:22:54,080 --> 00:22:56,800
Speaker 3: So she's talking these journeys and past lives and gods

553
00:22:56,880 --> 00:22:59,679
Speaker 3: and whatever's going on in this and all this moons

554
00:22:59,720 --> 00:23:01,760
Speaker 3: and yeah, all the lives and all the past lives

555
00:23:01,800 --> 00:23:02,160
Speaker 3: all that shit.

556
00:23:02,200 --> 00:23:04,600
Speaker 2: I'm like, yo, homie, I ain't arguing with you.

557
00:23:05,119 --> 00:23:07,960
Speaker 3: I'm like, there's fucking like past lives, all that show,

558
00:23:07,960 --> 00:23:08,480
Speaker 3: all the spirits.

559
00:23:08,520 --> 00:23:09,280
Speaker 2: I believe in it all.

560
00:23:09,560 --> 00:23:11,480
Speaker 3: But if you're trying to figure it out, you're gonna

561
00:23:11,480 --> 00:23:14,320
Speaker 3: be fucked right, because there ain't there's no figure out

562
00:23:14,320 --> 00:23:17,399
Speaker 3: you're just gonna be in trying to figure unsolvable.

563
00:23:16,880 --> 00:23:20,040
Speaker 2: Riddles the rest of your life, and you're gonna be cuckoo. Right.

564
00:23:20,240 --> 00:23:22,560
Speaker 2: So you're here, dude, the best you can. This is

565
00:23:22,600 --> 00:23:23,160
Speaker 2: where you're at.

566
00:23:23,720 --> 00:23:26,879
Speaker 3: This little motherfucker sneaks off to the jungle to go

567
00:23:27,000 --> 00:23:30,159
Speaker 3: do another ceremony. This is a true story, right fucking

568
00:23:30,240 --> 00:23:34,120
Speaker 3: in the jungle by herself. She's leaving at midnight. I'm

569
00:23:34,200 --> 00:23:36,119
Speaker 3: not the doctor cat like when the mom and when

570
00:23:36,160 --> 00:23:39,240
Speaker 3: there's a problem in the family, like manical shit, I'm always.

571
00:23:39,000 --> 00:23:39,560
Speaker 2: Like call your mom.

572
00:23:39,560 --> 00:23:40,359
Speaker 1: Mind, hold on.

573
00:23:40,480 --> 00:23:42,520
Speaker 4: The backstory of the story is that so I've been

574
00:23:42,680 --> 00:23:44,920
Speaker 4: I thought I was doing drugs for like four or

575
00:23:45,080 --> 00:23:45,880
Speaker 4: five US.

576
00:23:46,280 --> 00:23:49,240
Speaker 5: It was like two years, and it was getting really bad.

577
00:23:49,320 --> 00:23:51,320
Speaker 4: It was like k holes every night and just like

578
00:23:51,640 --> 00:23:53,840
Speaker 4: my body wasn't working, my brain isn't functioning.

579
00:23:53,880 --> 00:23:54,520
Speaker 5: I can't sleep.

580
00:23:54,600 --> 00:23:56,560
Speaker 4: It's just like I went from like, oh, I do

581
00:23:56,720 --> 00:23:59,000
Speaker 4: drugs that are like gonna make me feel a little

582
00:23:59,040 --> 00:24:01,040
Speaker 4: bit better, and all of a sudden, now I'm just

583
00:24:01,080 --> 00:24:03,280
Speaker 4: doing anything I can, and some things are working and

584
00:24:03,359 --> 00:24:04,159
Speaker 4: some things I don't care.

585
00:24:04,240 --> 00:24:05,159
Speaker 5: And it's like the same thing.

586
00:24:05,200 --> 00:24:07,119
Speaker 4: I'm not really scared of death, but I'm kind of

587
00:24:07,160 --> 00:24:09,040
Speaker 4: scared of just being here, uncomfortable in my skin.

588
00:24:09,119 --> 00:24:10,840
Speaker 5: I don't want to do it. So then I'm like

589
00:24:11,040 --> 00:24:13,399
Speaker 5: something I need God help me, God help me.

590
00:24:13,520 --> 00:24:16,240
Speaker 4: Like I hate I hate everything, and I'm like going

591
00:24:16,320 --> 00:24:19,399
Speaker 4: to do this third time, and this time I'm like,

592
00:24:19,680 --> 00:24:22,320
Speaker 4: I'm not doing this anymore. I don't want to be here.

593
00:24:22,600 --> 00:24:25,080
Speaker 4: I'm going to Columbia and I'm hoping I couldn't get

594
00:24:25,119 --> 00:24:25,479
Speaker 4: sober either.

595
00:24:25,520 --> 00:24:27,239
Speaker 5: You're supposed to get sober before you go do these

596
00:24:27,240 --> 00:24:29,359
Speaker 5: CEREMONI you're supposed to have like thirty days nothing. I

597
00:24:29,400 --> 00:24:31,520
Speaker 5: couldn't stop. I couldn't do stop my adrole, I can

598
00:24:31,560 --> 00:24:33,520
Speaker 5: stop my okay, because any of it.

599
00:24:33,880 --> 00:24:35,960
Speaker 4: So then I'm like, well, you know, if I die,

600
00:24:36,000 --> 00:24:37,600
Speaker 4: I die. If I lose my mind, I lose my mind,

601
00:24:37,640 --> 00:24:38,920
Speaker 4: It's fine. At least it's better than this.

602
00:24:39,400 --> 00:24:41,840
Speaker 5: So I go. I'm like packed, ready to.

603
00:24:41,880 --> 00:24:44,200
Speaker 4: Go, and my stomach is like kind of hurting. So

604
00:24:44,280 --> 00:24:46,560
Speaker 4: I call him one day in the morning. I'm like, oh,

605
00:24:46,600 --> 00:24:48,600
Speaker 4: my stumming is kind of hurting. He's like, I met,

606
00:24:48,600 --> 00:24:49,639
Speaker 4: your pendix is bursting.

607
00:24:49,760 --> 00:24:50,400
Speaker 1: Call your mom.

608
00:24:50,920 --> 00:24:51,720
Speaker 2: Like I didn't say that.

609
00:24:51,760 --> 00:24:54,520
Speaker 3: I said go to the emergency. Now you're appendix burst.

610
00:24:54,600 --> 00:24:57,359
Speaker 3: You don't remember the fucking story. I want your appendix burst.

611
00:24:57,119 --> 00:24:58,800
Speaker 2: And I don't know why. I just had my dad,

612
00:24:58,880 --> 00:25:01,320
Speaker 2: but I ain't like I'm like the fucking emergency room

613
00:25:01,400 --> 00:25:01,760
Speaker 2: right now.

614
00:25:02,240 --> 00:25:02,639
Speaker 1: I didn't.

615
00:25:02,680 --> 00:25:04,520
Speaker 4: I took my cast to get their nails clipped. I

616
00:25:04,560 --> 00:25:10,800
Speaker 4: kept packing my suitcase. I was likest and power before

617
00:25:10,920 --> 00:25:12,840
Speaker 4: my flight, and so if I had been on the flight,

618
00:25:12,960 --> 00:25:14,760
Speaker 4: I would have gone into.

619
00:25:14,840 --> 00:25:17,280
Speaker 5: Like it would have had spillags, my pantings would have

620
00:25:17,280 --> 00:25:19,520
Speaker 5: burst in the air on like some really cheap right.

621
00:25:19,600 --> 00:25:22,080
Speaker 4: It would have been like I would be on the

622
00:25:22,160 --> 00:25:24,920
Speaker 4: plane and like also, like do you really want to

623
00:25:25,119 --> 00:25:26,960
Speaker 4: sit on the plane and tell everyone like.

624
00:25:27,000 --> 00:25:29,560
Speaker 5: Hey, I could be constipated, I could.

625
00:25:29,400 --> 00:25:31,680
Speaker 1: Have gased, or my panics is gonna burst.

626
00:25:31,800 --> 00:25:33,520
Speaker 4: Please land this flight, Like I don't want to be

627
00:25:33,560 --> 00:25:35,840
Speaker 4: held responsible for like meeking all these people.

628
00:25:36,040 --> 00:25:38,320
Speaker 2: Whatever it is to the fucking she can go to jungle.

629
00:25:38,359 --> 00:25:40,359
Speaker 2: And she pretty much that it was like her like

630
00:25:40,560 --> 00:25:42,200
Speaker 2: she even cool ever.

631
00:25:42,160 --> 00:25:46,600
Speaker 4: Since just to me that was like the medicine or whatever,

632
00:25:46,760 --> 00:25:50,280
Speaker 4: being like yohomie, like I am here for like you know,

633
00:25:50,920 --> 00:25:53,240
Speaker 4: for certain times, and now you're like abusing me just

634
00:25:53,280 --> 00:25:55,480
Speaker 4: like everything else. So this isn't an option anymore, go

635
00:25:55,640 --> 00:25:57,920
Speaker 4: find something else. And that's where I'm like, oh my god,

636
00:25:58,000 --> 00:26:01,440
Speaker 4: my life has become completely powerless as well. I don't

637
00:26:01,480 --> 00:26:03,439
Speaker 4: have another option. I was gonna go there and if

638
00:26:03,440 --> 00:26:04,800
Speaker 4: I lost my mom, I was gonna go live in

639
00:26:04,840 --> 00:26:06,840
Speaker 4: the jungle and do whatever. And now I'm stuck here

640
00:26:07,240 --> 00:26:09,720
Speaker 4: with myself and my feelings and whatever the hell my

641
00:26:09,800 --> 00:26:11,600
Speaker 4: life looks like, and I have to figure out a way.

642
00:26:11,840 --> 00:26:13,240
Speaker 5: And that's where again I'm like kind of like, hi,

643
00:26:13,240 --> 00:26:15,399
Speaker 5: I'm just like willing. Can someone tell me what to do?

644
00:26:15,520 --> 00:26:17,680
Speaker 5: Because my way isn't working right?

645
00:26:17,800 --> 00:26:19,840
Speaker 1: So then who was the person that me to say

646
00:26:19,880 --> 00:26:21,560
Speaker 1: their name? But like, how did you finally come to

647
00:26:21,640 --> 00:26:23,520
Speaker 1: the resolution that you needed to get help?

648
00:26:23,920 --> 00:26:27,399
Speaker 4: Oh well, my panics burst and and I still couldn't

649
00:26:27,400 --> 00:26:29,560
Speaker 4: stop the drugs. That's when like, so I have I'm

650
00:26:29,760 --> 00:26:32,000
Speaker 4: very vain and like I care a lot about the

651
00:26:32,080 --> 00:26:33,840
Speaker 4: way that I look in my body and work out

652
00:26:33,880 --> 00:26:36,240
Speaker 4: some skin, and I have these big scars and I'm

653
00:26:36,280 --> 00:26:38,240
Speaker 4: still doing these kales. And I remember throwing up in

654
00:26:38,320 --> 00:26:41,280
Speaker 4: my sink and my thing my bleed, my my cuts

655
00:26:41,320 --> 00:26:43,560
Speaker 4: were bleeding, and I'm like, oh my god, like I

656
00:26:43,600 --> 00:26:45,960
Speaker 4: can't stop doing these drugs. So then I kind of

657
00:26:46,160 --> 00:26:47,520
Speaker 4: was like, I think I need to go to like

658
00:26:47,560 --> 00:26:48,440
Speaker 4: a meeting or something.

659
00:26:48,800 --> 00:26:48,840
Speaker 3: Go.

660
00:26:49,960 --> 00:26:50,840
Speaker 5: I found this woman.

661
00:26:51,000 --> 00:26:52,520
Speaker 4: I had a guy that I really liked, and he

662
00:26:52,680 --> 00:26:54,919
Speaker 4: kind of told me like he's actually my boyfriend now,

663
00:26:54,960 --> 00:26:57,680
Speaker 4: but he told me, like, you, I think you should

664
00:26:57,720 --> 00:26:59,359
Speaker 4: get sober, like I think you need to do like

665
00:26:59,480 --> 00:27:01,760
Speaker 4: some just go back to like ay do your thing.

666
00:27:01,760 --> 00:27:03,680
Speaker 5: And I was like, oh, God, like I don't. I

667
00:27:03,720 --> 00:27:05,800
Speaker 5: don't believe in elia. I don't want to found. But

668
00:27:05,880 --> 00:27:07,879
Speaker 5: I did find a sponsor. I just found like women

669
00:27:08,000 --> 00:27:10,800
Speaker 5: that I just trusted what they said. And that was it.

670
00:27:10,920 --> 00:27:12,920
Speaker 5: It was like I just listened to someone else whose

671
00:27:13,000 --> 00:27:14,320
Speaker 5: life seemed better than mine.

672
00:27:14,640 --> 00:27:15,760
Speaker 1: It was just that that's it.

673
00:27:15,920 --> 00:27:18,960
Speaker 5: My life is miserable, you seem you seem happy. That

674
00:27:19,160 --> 00:27:21,080
Speaker 5: was it, and I was just willing to listen to

675
00:27:21,080 --> 00:27:23,520
Speaker 5: that person. And my life's cool today. I'm pretty happy.

676
00:27:23,720 --> 00:27:26,240
Speaker 1: Yeah, you seem pretty happy. I mean that's a lot

677
00:27:26,320 --> 00:27:28,920
Speaker 1: to go through though at your age.

678
00:27:29,840 --> 00:27:32,119
Speaker 4: Yeah, I've gone through a lot of different things. That

679
00:27:32,280 --> 00:27:34,200
Speaker 4: one was kind of okay that you know that one

680
00:27:34,320 --> 00:27:36,560
Speaker 4: is self imposed. I would say like I've gone through

681
00:27:36,600 --> 00:27:38,399
Speaker 4: a lot of things that weren't self imposed or were

682
00:27:38,440 --> 00:27:41,480
Speaker 4: that just like a product of my own card that

683
00:27:41,600 --> 00:27:43,520
Speaker 4: I was dealt and like dealing with it the way

684
00:27:43,600 --> 00:27:45,960
Speaker 4: the best way that I could, but definitely like relapsing

685
00:27:46,040 --> 00:27:48,720
Speaker 4: and not looking for any sort of difference. I was

686
00:27:48,800 --> 00:27:51,600
Speaker 4: just my own thing and until I decided that I

687
00:27:51,880 --> 00:27:53,280
Speaker 4: just didn't want to do it that way.

688
00:27:53,280 --> 00:27:53,560
Speaker 3: Kind of.

689
00:28:02,480 --> 00:28:04,760
Speaker 1: So do you think that you got some of this?

690
00:28:05,600 --> 00:28:08,760
Speaker 1: You know, it's a little bit hereditary. I'm asking because

691
00:28:09,800 --> 00:28:12,639
Speaker 1: I don't know if you remember this story of you

692
00:28:12,880 --> 00:28:18,040
Speaker 1: and me, but you Hunter, your dad, myself, we took

693
00:28:18,080 --> 00:28:22,800
Speaker 1: you guys to the Cross Creek playground and you started

694
00:28:23,200 --> 00:28:27,000
Speaker 1: throwing sand at Hunter and it was like NonStop, and

695
00:28:27,080 --> 00:28:30,200
Speaker 1: it was all in Hunter's eyes and you were screaming

696
00:28:30,400 --> 00:28:32,879
Speaker 1: and we try to get you to stop, and you

697
00:28:33,080 --> 00:28:36,320
Speaker 1: were like, I don't really you know, like you you know?

698
00:28:36,440 --> 00:28:39,960
Speaker 1: And I he wasn't as strict as I was. I

699
00:28:40,080 --> 00:28:42,560
Speaker 1: came from like the South, and so I picked you

700
00:28:42,800 --> 00:28:45,680
Speaker 1: up and I looked at Rick and I said, stay

701
00:28:45,720 --> 00:28:48,640
Speaker 1: here with Hunter, have fun. I'm taking Tyson home. And

702
00:28:48,880 --> 00:28:50,960
Speaker 1: he was like you sure, and I'm like, yeah, trust me.

703
00:28:51,040 --> 00:28:53,160
Speaker 1: I pick you up and you're like punching me, but

704
00:28:53,280 --> 00:28:55,560
Speaker 1: you're like four, You're like your little fist and you're

705
00:28:55,600 --> 00:28:58,520
Speaker 1: like that had on and you're screaming. People all throughout

706
00:28:58,520 --> 00:29:00,200
Speaker 1: the park are like looking at us and like, I

707
00:29:00,440 --> 00:29:02,840
Speaker 1: just I can't worry about this. Put you in the car,

708
00:29:03,000 --> 00:29:05,640
Speaker 1: strapped you in, took you to the house, put you

709
00:29:05,720 --> 00:29:07,800
Speaker 1: in the back room, in the back bedroom that you

710
00:29:07,880 --> 00:29:10,520
Speaker 1: and Hundre used to stay in, and I said to you,

711
00:29:11,440 --> 00:29:14,240
Speaker 1: I was like, listen, I'm gonna lock the door and

712
00:29:14,280 --> 00:29:16,520
Speaker 1: you're gonna stay here until you stop crying.

713
00:29:16,320 --> 00:29:17,240
Speaker 5: And destroy everything.

714
00:29:17,640 --> 00:29:20,200
Speaker 1: I didn't lock the door because I was paranoid of

715
00:29:20,440 --> 00:29:23,760
Speaker 1: something happening, but I was like I'm not I'm not

716
00:29:23,920 --> 00:29:26,840
Speaker 1: dealing with your shit. Like, get over yourself. When you're done,

717
00:29:27,000 --> 00:29:30,360
Speaker 1: knock on the door and we can talk. And you

718
00:29:30,600 --> 00:29:35,160
Speaker 1: cried in that room for approximately five eight minutes, and

719
00:29:35,280 --> 00:29:37,960
Speaker 1: I was sitting outside. And then you were so cute

720
00:29:37,960 --> 00:29:39,760
Speaker 1: because all of a sudden there was this little knock

721
00:29:42,160 --> 00:29:46,200
Speaker 1: I'm ready, and I was like already, and I opened

722
00:29:46,200 --> 00:29:49,120
Speaker 1: the door and you were You were like a totally

723
00:29:49,160 --> 00:29:52,360
Speaker 1: different person, and you were calm, you were happy. I

724
00:29:52,400 --> 00:29:54,440
Speaker 1: think you were really happy that it was like your

725
00:29:54,520 --> 00:29:56,480
Speaker 1: sister wasn't there with us, that it was just like

726
00:29:56,560 --> 00:29:59,080
Speaker 1: you and me, and we sat down and like we

727
00:29:59,320 --> 00:30:01,200
Speaker 1: talked and we had and we watched TV and like

728
00:30:01,280 --> 00:30:06,320
Speaker 1: everything was cool. When they finally came back, you were fine.

729
00:30:06,480 --> 00:30:09,320
Speaker 1: But I always said it was like you reminded me.

730
00:30:10,080 --> 00:30:11,640
Speaker 1: Out of the two of you, you reminded me the

731
00:30:11,720 --> 00:30:14,959
Speaker 1: most of him with that like sort of stubborn streak.

732
00:30:15,040 --> 00:30:16,240
Speaker 1: You have a stubborn streak.

733
00:30:16,280 --> 00:30:18,440
Speaker 4: Well, I think it's like for me that would be

734
00:30:19,800 --> 00:30:23,080
Speaker 4: it's like that. It's almost like a bit of like

735
00:30:23,840 --> 00:30:27,000
Speaker 4: compulsive and like OCD. And so if it's like a

736
00:30:27,120 --> 00:30:32,000
Speaker 4: thought or if it's like an anger or like hundred

737
00:30:32,080 --> 00:30:34,240
Speaker 4: did something that pissed me off in that moment and

738
00:30:34,440 --> 00:30:37,320
Speaker 4: I want to throw sand at her, like and I

739
00:30:37,520 --> 00:30:40,600
Speaker 4: can't stop. It's like that until I think I think

740
00:30:40,720 --> 00:30:43,240
Speaker 4: something else switches, like the scene is different.

741
00:30:43,320 --> 00:30:46,360
Speaker 5: So even with like yeah, it's.

742
00:30:46,240 --> 00:30:49,680
Speaker 4: Just like until it's not working for anymore, like maybe

743
00:30:49,800 --> 00:30:52,600
Speaker 4: like with the sand, like I'm not out our sand anymore.

744
00:30:52,640 --> 00:30:54,240
Speaker 4: I have all these feelings, but I'm not back at

745
00:30:54,240 --> 00:30:56,840
Speaker 4: the sand thing like maybe I just now I need

746
00:30:56,920 --> 00:30:59,440
Speaker 4: to try something else, which is right, here's the opportunity

747
00:30:59,520 --> 00:31:03,280
Speaker 4: of being nice, having a nice conversation and like, okay,

748
00:31:03,320 --> 00:31:04,880
Speaker 4: I can do that, because that's the same way when

749
00:31:04,880 --> 00:31:06,640
Speaker 4: I got sober the first time, I was a really

750
00:31:06,680 --> 00:31:09,640
Speaker 4: big disaster and they like separated me from this one

751
00:31:09,720 --> 00:31:13,000
Speaker 4: house and like it was just a whole, just like

752
00:31:13,160 --> 00:31:14,920
Speaker 4: and they told me that you're gonna bean rehab till

753
00:31:14,920 --> 00:31:16,640
Speaker 4: you're eighteen years old. I was like, that's three years.

754
00:31:16,680 --> 00:31:19,240
Speaker 4: I'm so depressed. I saw all these kids moving and going.

755
00:31:19,280 --> 00:31:20,960
Speaker 4: It was forty day program. I was in there for

756
00:31:21,040 --> 00:31:22,560
Speaker 4: like six months. I was like, what is going on?

757
00:31:23,360 --> 00:31:26,280
Speaker 5: But I remember it was like my way again.

758
00:31:26,240 --> 00:31:28,560
Speaker 4: Isn't working, and like I'm gonna be in like a

759
00:31:28,640 --> 00:31:32,040
Speaker 4: shitty situation if I don't fix this. And he was like,

760
00:31:32,120 --> 00:31:34,680
Speaker 4: look Homeie, like you can keep like trying to off

761
00:31:34,720 --> 00:31:37,280
Speaker 4: yourself and like being a crazy person, or you can

762
00:31:37,320 --> 00:31:40,840
Speaker 4: go live in Malibu and we're like get a nice little.

763
00:31:40,720 --> 00:31:42,760
Speaker 5: Job and like be normal.

764
00:31:42,800 --> 00:31:44,920
Speaker 1: And I was like that sounds like a good idea.

765
00:31:45,080 --> 00:31:47,680
Speaker 2: And I was like yoga, Like we're on that strip

766
00:31:47,760 --> 00:31:50,280
Speaker 2: of a fucking pat You don't got it that fucking bad.

767
00:31:50,720 --> 00:31:53,880
Speaker 3: I'm like, oh, you obviously wasn't handling drugs and alcohol,

768
00:31:54,200 --> 00:31:57,000
Speaker 3: so you can't do none until you're fucking eighteen years old.

769
00:31:57,440 --> 00:31:58,880
Speaker 2: But you know what I mean, you got the whole

770
00:31:58,960 --> 00:32:01,360
Speaker 2: life in front of you and like you, I'm doing drugs.

771
00:32:01,360 --> 00:32:03,400
Speaker 1: You got a good life, And so how do you, like,

772
00:32:03,520 --> 00:32:04,640
Speaker 1: how do you stay sober? Now?

773
00:32:05,520 --> 00:32:08,320
Speaker 5: Well, I work a very strong program of recovery.

774
00:32:09,040 --> 00:32:11,840
Speaker 4: I like wake up every day and like my my

775
00:32:11,960 --> 00:32:14,960
Speaker 4: sponsor Kara, who's like my little mentor, she always says,

776
00:32:15,000 --> 00:32:16,920
Speaker 4: like you wake up every day with entrey your alcoholism.

777
00:32:17,040 --> 00:32:18,840
Speaker 4: So every single day you have to be of service

778
00:32:18,880 --> 00:32:21,120
Speaker 4: to someone else. You have to get outside yourself because

779
00:32:21,160 --> 00:32:24,840
Speaker 4: the problem is you. It's like bondage of self, self seeking, selfish,

780
00:32:25,040 --> 00:32:27,520
Speaker 4: all about me, self center, fear, I'm not going to

781
00:32:27,560 --> 00:32:29,280
Speaker 4: be enough, I'm not gonna succeed, I'm not gonna have

782
00:32:29,320 --> 00:32:30,720
Speaker 4: the job, I'm not gonna get the guy, I'm not

783
00:32:30,760 --> 00:32:31,480
Speaker 4: gonna keep the.

784
00:32:31,520 --> 00:32:32,480
Speaker 5: Guy, whatever it is.

785
00:32:32,840 --> 00:32:34,920
Speaker 4: And then it's like getting outside myself helping someone else,

786
00:32:34,960 --> 00:32:36,719
Speaker 4: showing up with my dad, come and to hang out

787
00:32:36,720 --> 00:32:38,680
Speaker 4: with you. Like now I'm not thinking about me and

788
00:32:38,800 --> 00:32:41,720
Speaker 4: I'm at peace, right, So it's all that stuff. And

789
00:32:41,800 --> 00:32:44,680
Speaker 4: then yeah, it's just like and again it's like it's

790
00:32:44,760 --> 00:32:46,760
Speaker 4: like listening to someone else. I usually don't have the

791
00:32:46,840 --> 00:32:50,040
Speaker 4: greatest idea. My head usually is always full of like

792
00:32:50,200 --> 00:32:52,840
Speaker 4: fear and like not the right thing, So going to

793
00:32:52,920 --> 00:32:55,400
Speaker 4: someone else, talking to someone else and just knowing I

794
00:32:55,680 --> 00:32:58,760
Speaker 4: can't operate unlike drugs, it just doesn't work. I like

795
00:32:59,440 --> 00:33:02,440
Speaker 4: tried it, and my life becomes very catastrophused very quick.

796
00:33:02,840 --> 00:33:04,440
Speaker 4: So it's like proof is in the pudding. I want

797
00:33:04,440 --> 00:33:05,920
Speaker 4: to be happy, I want a good life, I want

798
00:33:05,960 --> 00:33:07,320
Speaker 4: to be successful, I want all those things.

799
00:33:07,640 --> 00:33:09,920
Speaker 5: So it's like I can't have that with drugs. I

800
00:33:10,160 --> 00:33:12,040
Speaker 5: just have to not do them and find something else

801
00:33:12,240 --> 00:33:12,680
Speaker 5: that works.

802
00:33:13,280 --> 00:33:16,239
Speaker 1: So do you guys hold each other accountable now at all?

803
00:33:16,480 --> 00:33:16,520
Speaker 3: No?

804
00:33:16,720 --> 00:33:18,240
Speaker 1: Or you keep it all totally separate?

805
00:33:18,400 --> 00:33:19,120
Speaker 5: Yeah, because that.

806
00:33:19,280 --> 00:33:22,480
Speaker 4: Was like, like, well, it's also yeah, it's also like

807
00:33:22,600 --> 00:33:24,840
Speaker 4: that was for me a really big problem was that

808
00:33:24,960 --> 00:33:27,120
Speaker 4: I was like, Okay, great, your life's altogether, but like

809
00:33:27,200 --> 00:33:28,640
Speaker 4: I want to die and I hate mine.

810
00:33:28,760 --> 00:33:30,720
Speaker 5: But I felt because he got he had five.

811
00:33:30,600 --> 00:33:33,959
Speaker 4: Years when I zero, like I just started being in rehab,

812
00:33:34,240 --> 00:33:36,600
Speaker 4: I did feel like, well, no one else has any

813
00:33:36,640 --> 00:33:38,880
Speaker 4: skin in the game besides me and him, especially like

814
00:33:39,000 --> 00:33:41,600
Speaker 4: Quarantine came in and it was like everyone in Quarantine

815
00:33:41,720 --> 00:33:43,320
Speaker 4: was just doing so many drugs and it was like

816
00:33:43,560 --> 00:33:45,240
Speaker 4: the only other person I knew that was sober was

817
00:33:45,280 --> 00:33:45,600
Speaker 4: my dad.

818
00:33:45,640 --> 00:33:46,680
Speaker 5: And I feel like vice versa.

819
00:33:47,040 --> 00:33:50,400
Speaker 4: But I just felt slightly like, how is he supposed

820
00:33:50,440 --> 00:33:52,680
Speaker 4: to say sober if no one else around him is sober?

821
00:33:52,840 --> 00:33:54,720
Speaker 4: But for me, I wasn't happy sober. So that's where

822
00:33:54,840 --> 00:33:58,080
Speaker 4: like it wasn't working at that time. But now it's

823
00:33:58,200 --> 00:34:00,680
Speaker 4: just like we just hang out, but we are not

824
00:34:00,840 --> 00:34:02,160
Speaker 4: like sober buddies or anything.

825
00:34:02,520 --> 00:34:04,600
Speaker 1: No sober buddies but their daughter and we're sober.

826
00:34:04,640 --> 00:34:06,200
Speaker 2: Right, My daughter is sober. I'm proud of her. She's

827
00:34:06,280 --> 00:34:09,000
Speaker 2: working awesome. We was there for a hundred times more

828
00:34:09,080 --> 00:34:10,760
Speaker 2: than me. I needed to rehab.

829
00:34:10,840 --> 00:34:12,640
Speaker 3: I went to a a long time, not saying they

830
00:34:12,640 --> 00:34:14,480
Speaker 3: didn't do it. I just didn't have anyone hold my

831
00:34:14,600 --> 00:34:16,800
Speaker 3: hand and really sit me down and really make me

832
00:34:16,880 --> 00:34:18,880
Speaker 3: do shit or there's never just I just went and

833
00:34:19,120 --> 00:34:21,160
Speaker 3: would listen to stories. And that was enough for me,

834
00:34:21,239 --> 00:34:23,200
Speaker 3: by the way, to see some cool people that I

835
00:34:23,360 --> 00:34:26,040
Speaker 3: respected that didn't do drugs and alcohol anymore was enough

836
00:34:26,080 --> 00:34:27,239
Speaker 3: for me to stay sober for a lot.

837
00:34:27,200 --> 00:34:28,880
Speaker 2: Of times, but not change my life and do all that.

838
00:34:29,560 --> 00:34:31,920
Speaker 2: And and she got all that. She found some amazing

839
00:34:31,960 --> 00:34:33,160
Speaker 2: women that like held.

840
00:34:33,000 --> 00:34:34,880
Speaker 3: Her hand and take her through the steps and do

841
00:34:35,040 --> 00:34:37,239
Speaker 3: you know, make her work, and they're serious I didn't.

842
00:34:37,600 --> 00:34:38,600
Speaker 2: That's not my experience.

843
00:34:38,680 --> 00:34:40,800
Speaker 5: Yeah, But so for me, it's just finding people that

844
00:34:41,000 --> 00:34:42,799
Speaker 5: like have again like what he said, how would I want?

845
00:34:42,880 --> 00:34:44,759
Speaker 5: And are just like living life. God, I just hang

846
00:34:44,800 --> 00:34:46,399
Speaker 5: out with sober people and I do sober things.

847
00:34:46,560 --> 00:34:48,080
Speaker 1: I mean, you must be proud of each other, like

848
00:34:48,239 --> 00:34:52,279
Speaker 1: I'm you know, like I'm super proud of you, just

849
00:34:52,920 --> 00:34:58,759
Speaker 1: knowing what you were like and seeing you after you know,

850
00:34:58,960 --> 00:35:02,440
Speaker 1: a bender and being so scared that I was going

851
00:35:02,520 --> 00:35:04,719
Speaker 1: to get the phone call that you know, you had died.

852
00:35:04,880 --> 00:35:08,880
Speaker 1: So for me, it's it's really really really proud of you,

853
00:35:09,320 --> 00:35:11,920
Speaker 1: and I think you're doing phenomenal and now hearing your story,

854
00:35:12,600 --> 00:35:15,719
Speaker 1: knowing like what kind of a little girl you were

855
00:35:16,040 --> 00:35:18,439
Speaker 1: and that you were you were my kind of little

856
00:35:18,480 --> 00:35:21,480
Speaker 1: girl in the sense of I always liked the sort

857
00:35:21,520 --> 00:35:26,880
Speaker 1: of stubborn spunky you were named properly, right, Tyson is

858
00:35:26,960 --> 00:35:29,319
Speaker 1: the proper name for you. And but I always liked

859
00:35:29,360 --> 00:35:32,680
Speaker 1: that you were a tomboy. You you know, handled yourself.

860
00:35:32,800 --> 00:35:35,000
Speaker 1: But now to know everything that you went through and

861
00:35:35,080 --> 00:35:39,120
Speaker 1: that you're you know, sober and you seem and you're successful,

862
00:35:39,280 --> 00:35:42,799
Speaker 1: you have found sort of what makes you happy. Right,

863
00:35:42,880 --> 00:35:45,919
Speaker 1: you have a bomb that you do called time bomb

864
00:35:46,560 --> 00:35:49,560
Speaker 1: that's for your body and it's all natural and you

865
00:35:49,680 --> 00:35:52,800
Speaker 1: make it yourself and you have it like put it

866
00:35:52,880 --> 00:35:57,200
Speaker 1: off on twenty assistants or manufacturing company or anything else

867
00:35:57,280 --> 00:35:59,880
Speaker 1: you're and it's like sold out all the time. Right.

868
00:36:00,040 --> 00:36:02,400
Speaker 4: Yeah, Well, it originally happened just kind of like on

869
00:36:02,520 --> 00:36:06,400
Speaker 4: TikTok and stuff, like I'd been just doing kind of skincare, healthcare,

870
00:36:06,760 --> 00:36:11,000
Speaker 4: like mental health, just whatever, just positive healthy living type stuff,

871
00:36:11,120 --> 00:36:12,800
Speaker 4: and my skincare was always including that.

872
00:36:12,920 --> 00:36:16,120
Speaker 5: This like video went super viral me doing my nighttime

873
00:36:16,239 --> 00:36:18,080
Speaker 5: routine and people were like, what are you using? And

874
00:36:18,120 --> 00:36:19,960
Speaker 5: I'm like, this is just my product. They're like can

875
00:36:20,040 --> 00:36:21,759
Speaker 5: we have it? And I was like it's not out,

876
00:36:21,840 --> 00:36:23,520
Speaker 5: and they're like can you make it? And I was

877
00:36:23,640 --> 00:36:26,279
Speaker 5: like okay, I guess. And I thought it was going

878
00:36:26,360 --> 00:36:29,239
Speaker 5: to be like maybe one hundred people and that was

879
00:36:29,360 --> 00:36:30,320
Speaker 5: kind of gonna be it.

880
00:36:30,440 --> 00:36:32,120
Speaker 4: And so I opened the thing and it got like,

881
00:36:32,600 --> 00:36:34,279
Speaker 4: you know, two thousand right away, and I was like

882
00:36:34,400 --> 00:36:35,920
Speaker 4: closed the store and I was like, oh my god,

883
00:36:35,960 --> 00:36:37,920
Speaker 4: I have to figure out how to do this and

884
00:36:38,120 --> 00:36:40,200
Speaker 4: like see see the occasion I had now like all

885
00:36:40,239 --> 00:36:43,640
Speaker 4: these people's money like that was you know, depositive and

886
00:36:43,760 --> 00:36:44,480
Speaker 4: have investors.

887
00:36:44,520 --> 00:36:47,120
Speaker 5: The customers were my investors, and like they were like.

888
00:36:47,120 --> 00:36:48,640
Speaker 4: We just want to make it take your time, and

889
00:36:48,680 --> 00:36:50,480
Speaker 4: I was like, I got to do this. And I

890
00:36:50,600 --> 00:36:52,719
Speaker 4: found like random girls at the nail salon. They were like,

891
00:36:52,800 --> 00:36:54,480
Speaker 4: I just moved here and I don't have any friends.

892
00:36:54,520 --> 00:36:56,120
Speaker 5: I'd be like, you can come work for me and

893
00:36:56,239 --> 00:36:57,640
Speaker 5: hang out with me in my apartment.

894
00:36:57,719 --> 00:37:00,080
Speaker 4: I have friends, and like these girls would come and

895
00:37:00,200 --> 00:37:02,160
Speaker 4: work for me and hang out and I would just

896
00:37:02,239 --> 00:37:04,239
Speaker 4: do these drops and every time I saw and it

897
00:37:04,320 --> 00:37:06,120
Speaker 4: was like the first time I did like eight hundred

898
00:37:06,520 --> 00:37:08,600
Speaker 4: eight hundred and like two hours and I closed the

899
00:37:08,640 --> 00:37:09,960
Speaker 4: door and make them all up. Then I did like

900
00:37:10,040 --> 00:37:12,960
Speaker 4: two thousand and three hours and closed the store. I

901
00:37:13,000 --> 00:37:14,440
Speaker 4: make it up, and I just kept it like this,

902
00:37:15,040 --> 00:37:17,279
Speaker 4: kind of like scarcity.

903
00:37:17,480 --> 00:37:18,360
Speaker 2: Never left the store.

904
00:37:19,000 --> 00:37:21,239
Speaker 5: Yeah, I never left the store. So it was like

905
00:37:21,560 --> 00:37:23,800
Speaker 5: it was either like I didn't need you, you needed

906
00:37:23,960 --> 00:37:24,919
Speaker 5: this because like here.

907
00:37:25,000 --> 00:37:26,360
Speaker 1: Anyway, it's currently out of stock.

908
00:37:26,440 --> 00:37:29,640
Speaker 6: Because I told that store, I'm as many motherfuckers says,

909
00:37:29,680 --> 00:37:39,719
Speaker 6: you can't even figure it out, you guys.

910
00:37:40,160 --> 00:37:44,440
Speaker 1: Rick was so sort of anti podcast that he actually

911
00:37:44,680 --> 00:37:48,680
Speaker 1: yesterday offered me thirty thousand dollars instead of doing the podcast,

912
00:37:48,760 --> 00:37:51,879
Speaker 1: and I was like, no, thank you a million.

913
00:37:51,840 --> 00:37:55,480
Speaker 2: I was, and get out of this thing. It's like

914
00:37:55,520 --> 00:37:59,279
Speaker 2: a number thing, like okay, we all have our number, right, Yeah,

915
00:38:00,120 --> 00:38:03,320
Speaker 2: I'm doing it for you. This is your deal. And

916
00:38:03,960 --> 00:38:05,120
Speaker 2: you know that's just where I'm at.

917
00:38:05,760 --> 00:38:09,360
Speaker 1: I left off before we got into everything else. Do

918
00:38:09,440 --> 00:38:12,359
Speaker 1: you have any memories of like, because you were so young,

919
00:38:12,800 --> 00:38:13,000
Speaker 1: I do.

920
00:38:13,960 --> 00:38:19,080
Speaker 4: I remember swimming, I remember Leroy dog and yeah, I

921
00:38:19,120 --> 00:38:20,760
Speaker 4: mean I remember you were.

922
00:38:21,200 --> 00:38:24,640
Speaker 5: Like stern like you said, I always liked stuff.

923
00:38:24,400 --> 00:38:27,200
Speaker 1: Like that because you know, it was like I needed

924
00:38:27,560 --> 00:38:29,360
Speaker 1: like the boundaries.

925
00:38:29,000 --> 00:38:33,960
Speaker 4: Boundaries rules and like I can't win here. I always

926
00:38:34,040 --> 00:38:36,760
Speaker 4: needed that very clear line. Otherwise I was always gonna

927
00:38:36,880 --> 00:38:40,160
Speaker 4: like bully, you go over it, get what I want,

928
00:38:40,360 --> 00:38:42,799
Speaker 4: and like what I wanted usually was never the right

929
00:38:42,880 --> 00:38:43,320
Speaker 4: thing for me.

930
00:38:43,520 --> 00:38:43,640
Speaker 3: You know.

931
00:38:43,719 --> 00:38:45,960
Speaker 5: It's like with a kid being like, what do you

932
00:38:46,040 --> 00:38:48,319
Speaker 5: want candy or broccoli? I want candy. Well you're gonna

933
00:38:48,320 --> 00:38:51,320
Speaker 5: have Rockley right Like I just wanted my way. So

934
00:38:51,440 --> 00:38:55,640
Speaker 5: I do remember that, and I remember hanging out on

935
00:38:55,719 --> 00:38:57,360
Speaker 5: the couch. That was about it.

936
00:38:58,520 --> 00:39:01,440
Speaker 1: Oh my god, I should have folloween costumes. That's I

937
00:39:01,600 --> 00:39:04,040
Speaker 1: was just gonna say, I'm gonna pull out those photos

938
00:39:04,080 --> 00:39:05,920
Speaker 1: and I'm going to post them when this comes out.

939
00:39:06,320 --> 00:39:09,560
Speaker 1: He was in his astronaut suit. Yeah you were, Yeah,

940
00:39:09,640 --> 00:39:12,080
Speaker 1: you were the astronaut with the full helmet and everything.

941
00:39:12,680 --> 00:39:13,439
Speaker 5: I liked your huh.

942
00:39:14,160 --> 00:39:18,840
Speaker 1: I remember liking being here, like thank you, yeah, thank you?

943
00:39:19,040 --> 00:39:24,439
Speaker 1: All right, you why don't we talking about Yeah, let's

944
00:39:24,480 --> 00:39:26,920
Speaker 1: not like like what is I want to know, like

945
00:39:27,560 --> 00:39:31,720
Speaker 1: the best thing about our time together and your biggest regret.

946
00:39:35,280 --> 00:39:37,120
Speaker 1: I know, I'm like, it's time to hit hard.

947
00:39:38,080 --> 00:39:41,560
Speaker 2: I had some uh, I don't know every guy's dream.

948
00:39:41,600 --> 00:39:43,680
Speaker 2: Like I'm fucking very proud that I've married you. I

949
00:39:43,760 --> 00:39:45,360
Speaker 2: love you a lot. I just like to think, I

950
00:39:45,400 --> 00:39:47,560
Speaker 2: mean like wow, I mean like you're the best looking

951
00:39:47,600 --> 00:39:49,680
Speaker 2: brunette fucking with the light eyes in the world. So

952
00:39:49,840 --> 00:39:52,600
Speaker 2: like you know, I got her, so like what a

953
00:39:53,280 --> 00:39:55,920
Speaker 2: great one? Remember somehow like.

954
00:39:56,000 --> 00:39:58,200
Speaker 3: You know, I mean, whatever it is, I've accomplished some

955
00:39:58,239 --> 00:40:01,000
Speaker 3: ship sort of for my dreams, you know what I mean,

956
00:40:01,080 --> 00:40:04,400
Speaker 3: like little Ricky Solomon's New Jersey dreams that come to California.

957
00:40:04,640 --> 00:40:06,120
Speaker 2: And like I knew when I was a little kid,

958
00:40:06,320 --> 00:40:08,879
Speaker 2: like teachers I could tell that they know I didn't

959
00:40:08,880 --> 00:40:10,600
Speaker 2: go to school. My mom died, like no I didn't.

960
00:40:10,600 --> 00:40:13,239
Speaker 3: I squeak on school seventh grade, and I could tell

961
00:40:13,239 --> 00:40:15,160
Speaker 3: a teacher, even though they pushed me ahead for a

962
00:40:15,200 --> 00:40:16,759
Speaker 3: couple of years, but I never went, you know, and

963
00:40:16,800 --> 00:40:17,879
Speaker 3: I could tell teachers.

964
00:40:17,560 --> 00:40:20,360
Speaker 2: Weren't gonna be fucking happy. And you know, they weren't happy.

965
00:40:20,400 --> 00:40:21,560
Speaker 2: I'm like, what are you going to teach me? You're

966
00:40:21,600 --> 00:40:21,919
Speaker 2: not happy?

967
00:40:21,960 --> 00:40:24,120
Speaker 3: You live in New Jersey home, it's freezing, and they're

968
00:40:24,120 --> 00:40:26,319
Speaker 3: not happy. Somebody's get burst out crying. Sometimes they would

969
00:40:26,400 --> 00:40:27,880
Speaker 3: hit me, you know what. But I could tell that

970
00:40:28,000 --> 00:40:29,960
Speaker 3: as a little kid, and I came out here and

971
00:40:30,360 --> 00:40:32,279
Speaker 3: you know, I mean, I like, you know, like, yeah,

972
00:40:32,360 --> 00:40:35,400
Speaker 3: you're a part of my story and and what for

973
00:40:35,760 --> 00:40:38,279
Speaker 3: amazing that I was married to you and I loved

974
00:40:38,280 --> 00:40:40,120
Speaker 3: you and we had some great times, we had some

975
00:40:40,200 --> 00:40:41,760
Speaker 3: mild times, we had some bad times.

976
00:40:41,800 --> 00:40:43,960
Speaker 2: But it's all part of my journey and got me here.

977
00:40:44,040 --> 00:40:46,400
Speaker 1: So I don't think I've ever heard you compliment me

978
00:40:46,480 --> 00:40:50,880
Speaker 1: that much. That's really sweet. What's your biggest regret?

979
00:40:51,960 --> 00:40:54,120
Speaker 2: I don't really have no regrets.

980
00:40:54,360 --> 00:40:57,480
Speaker 1: I know, I know you're like, it's life.

981
00:41:00,200 --> 00:41:01,880
Speaker 3: With them, I mean, I fuck, you know what I mean, Like,

982
00:41:01,960 --> 00:41:04,799
Speaker 3: I like, you know, there's videos of them fucking you.

983
00:41:04,840 --> 00:41:07,360
Speaker 2: Know, crying like I know my mommy loves me, but

984
00:41:07,440 --> 00:41:09,400
Speaker 2: where's my daddy? You know, I disappeared for months. I

985
00:41:09,440 --> 00:41:11,080
Speaker 2: didn't hang out with the kids. I like co you

986
00:41:11,120 --> 00:41:13,279
Speaker 2: know most of the time. You know, I'm smoking crack.

987
00:41:13,320 --> 00:41:14,840
Speaker 2: I'm not near my kids, you know.

988
00:41:15,160 --> 00:41:15,200
Speaker 3: So.

989
00:41:15,680 --> 00:41:17,640
Speaker 2: But now, for the last fifteen years, I got to

990
00:41:17,719 --> 00:41:19,760
Speaker 2: be there, present, accountable.

991
00:41:19,360 --> 00:41:21,640
Speaker 3: And wanting to be there. I'm there for my you know,

992
00:41:21,880 --> 00:41:24,280
Speaker 3: and for anybody. I'm like there in president, I'm not thinking.

993
00:41:24,520 --> 00:41:27,400
Speaker 3: I might be thinking about my game sometimes because I do.

994
00:41:27,560 --> 00:41:29,640
Speaker 3: We bet a lot of stuff. But besides that, I'm here,

995
00:41:29,680 --> 00:41:31,440
Speaker 3: I'm present. I haven't looked at my phone for a

996
00:41:31,480 --> 00:41:33,320
Speaker 3: fucking thing. I'm like, you know, and I want to

997
00:41:33,360 --> 00:41:34,719
Speaker 3: be there, and I'm happy to be there.

998
00:41:35,040 --> 00:41:37,359
Speaker 2: And so that's just a huge difference. And I don't

999
00:41:37,360 --> 00:41:40,160
Speaker 2: think any of that what you know, thats just happened.

1000
00:41:40,719 --> 00:41:42,600
Speaker 3: You know. I don't know if I stayed married to you,

1001
00:41:42,719 --> 00:41:45,319
Speaker 3: what would happen? And you know, who the fuck knows?

1002
00:41:45,360 --> 00:41:48,000
Speaker 3: I don't know, you know, like the story would be different, right,

1003
00:41:48,560 --> 00:41:50,680
Speaker 3: don't know, my story would be different. I probably wouldn't

1004
00:41:50,680 --> 00:41:54,240
Speaker 3: have the success I do today. And also I probably

1005
00:41:54,280 --> 00:41:55,719
Speaker 3: might not ever got sober, I might be dead.

1006
00:41:55,800 --> 00:41:57,759
Speaker 2: I don't know. There's so many of my friends that died.

1007
00:41:57,960 --> 00:41:58,719
Speaker 2: I mean, people are just.

1008
00:41:58,760 --> 00:42:01,359
Speaker 1: Dying, don't they stayed married? Maybe no, I'm just trying

1009
00:42:01,400 --> 00:42:03,160
Speaker 1: to say, just like, I don't know. Maybe it would

1010
00:42:03,160 --> 00:42:05,600
Speaker 1: have gotten sober sooner and had more success earlier, but

1011
00:42:05,719 --> 00:42:06,120
Speaker 1: I don't know.

1012
00:42:06,280 --> 00:42:08,560
Speaker 2: But also I was under the thing of like, no,

1013
00:42:08,880 --> 00:42:09,839
Speaker 2: you probably could have pulled off.

1014
00:42:09,880 --> 00:42:12,400
Speaker 1: I don't know what you can't like rewriting history and

1015
00:42:12,480 --> 00:42:17,520
Speaker 1: having regrets. I don't really don't think, I dam were

1016
00:42:17,600 --> 00:42:20,880
Speaker 1: you prepared at all for the kind of attention that

1017
00:42:21,239 --> 00:42:24,160
Speaker 1: you would receive as like my husband, because as you stated,

1018
00:42:24,200 --> 00:42:26,960
Speaker 1: I was super famous at the time. Were you prepared

1019
00:42:27,040 --> 00:42:27,200
Speaker 1: for that?

1020
00:42:28,280 --> 00:42:29,759
Speaker 2: I didn't really. I mean I don't think.

1021
00:42:29,840 --> 00:42:32,360
Speaker 1: It really didn't really bother you, and we.

1022
00:42:32,400 --> 00:42:35,200
Speaker 3: Didn't really We hung on. We were pretty isolated a

1023
00:42:35,239 --> 00:42:36,600
Speaker 3: little bit, and when I went, I don't think.

1024
00:42:36,520 --> 00:42:38,239
Speaker 2: It was that big. It was like it was it

1025
00:42:38,600 --> 00:42:40,000
Speaker 2: was not life was right.

1026
00:42:40,480 --> 00:42:42,359
Speaker 1: We were like around a lot of other famous people,

1027
00:42:42,480 --> 00:42:47,800
Speaker 1: so it wasn't always your friends not mine. How do

1028
00:42:47,920 --> 00:42:50,200
Speaker 1: we remain friends? Because I don't think there were really

1029
00:42:50,239 --> 00:42:51,120
Speaker 1: any hard feelings.

1030
00:42:52,320 --> 00:42:52,799
Speaker 3: It was cool.

1031
00:42:53,280 --> 00:42:56,320
Speaker 2: I think whatever I was still in there for a

1032
00:42:56,400 --> 00:42:57,480
Speaker 2: couple of years after them.

1033
00:42:58,040 --> 00:43:00,759
Speaker 1: That's true. We didn't actually like that's we didn't like

1034
00:43:01,080 --> 00:43:04,239
Speaker 1: end in like we ended the marriage, but we would

1035
00:43:04,320 --> 00:43:07,120
Speaker 1: see each other on occasion because there was still like

1036
00:43:07,360 --> 00:43:10,480
Speaker 1: love and feelings there and attraction and all of that.

1037
00:43:10,760 --> 00:43:13,520
Speaker 1: So yeah, you would come over the house. It was

1038
00:43:13,880 --> 00:43:14,439
Speaker 1: we had fun.

1039
00:43:15,480 --> 00:43:15,719
Speaker 5: Fun.

1040
00:43:16,360 --> 00:43:18,719
Speaker 1: So it didn't last. The marriage lasted a little over

1041
00:43:18,760 --> 00:43:22,319
Speaker 1: a year, but the relationship lasted longer than that. Yeah,

1042
00:43:23,200 --> 00:43:26,560
Speaker 1: do you want to answer this? Uh, you married Pam

1043
00:43:26,680 --> 00:43:31,920
Speaker 1: Anderson twice. Do you regret regret doing it twice? No,

1044
00:43:32,160 --> 00:43:36,799
Speaker 1: he has no regrets regrets zero, doesn't doesn't. It doesn't matter.

1045
00:43:38,160 --> 00:43:39,719
Speaker 2: And we talked yesterday today.

1046
00:43:41,760 --> 00:43:44,680
Speaker 1: Yeah, you're like weird that way you stay friends with

1047
00:43:44,800 --> 00:43:45,400
Speaker 1: your exes.

1048
00:43:46,080 --> 00:43:47,399
Speaker 5: Passed it along to me too.

1049
00:43:47,920 --> 00:43:50,960
Speaker 4: You do it also, Yeah, he well he's always said

1050
00:43:51,560 --> 00:43:54,080
Speaker 4: he's like, he's like, I don't know, Like, no one

1051
00:43:54,320 --> 00:43:57,359
Speaker 4: like you didn't like hurt each other, Like what why

1052
00:43:57,480 --> 00:43:58,640
Speaker 4: would it didn't work out?

1053
00:43:58,800 --> 00:43:59,800
Speaker 5: He's like, it didn't work.

1054
00:43:59,640 --> 00:44:01,080
Speaker 2: Out, shared all your life.

1055
00:44:00,920 --> 00:44:03,960
Speaker 5: You lost them, it didn't work out. Why would you

1056
00:44:04,000 --> 00:44:06,800
Speaker 5: hate them? Why? What's like, no one hurt you know?

1057
00:44:06,840 --> 00:44:12,640
Speaker 1: I think because there's people that do hurt people even like, Okay,

1058
00:44:12,719 --> 00:44:13,799
Speaker 1: crack the heart and did the ship?

1059
00:44:14,160 --> 00:44:16,440
Speaker 3: Yeah, still, like I love that, dude, it's been fifteen

1060
00:44:16,520 --> 00:44:18,200
Speaker 3: years or something like what's up home?

1061
00:44:18,320 --> 00:44:19,880
Speaker 2: How are you going? Nice to see your Remember we

1062
00:44:19,960 --> 00:44:21,759
Speaker 2: had a good time, Remember we did this.

1063
00:44:21,880 --> 00:44:22,160
Speaker 3: Remember.

1064
00:44:22,160 --> 00:44:25,120
Speaker 2: I mean, that's just it's also that's just like normal.

1065
00:44:25,880 --> 00:44:28,200
Speaker 3: And then also what Pamela, there's like kids, No, your

1066
00:44:28,280 --> 00:44:30,600
Speaker 3: kids are still like I see those kids all the time.

1067
00:44:30,800 --> 00:44:32,799
Speaker 2: Yeah, around, So there's like and but I.

1068
00:44:32,840 --> 00:44:35,839
Speaker 4: Also think like it's it's like, Okay, if you had

1069
00:44:36,000 --> 00:44:38,800
Speaker 4: all of you had a hundred good moments or memories

1070
00:44:38,840 --> 00:44:40,759
Speaker 4: to someone and then they sucked up maybe like five

1071
00:44:40,840 --> 00:44:42,719
Speaker 4: times of those, it's like you're gonna hate them based.

1072
00:44:42,520 --> 00:44:45,560
Speaker 5: On five rather than just appreciating maybe one hundred and being.

1073
00:44:45,480 --> 00:44:47,080
Speaker 1: Like I like them, I was not gonna sat that.

1074
00:44:47,400 --> 00:44:48,960
Speaker 1: I mean, I think it's different for everyone, right. I

1075
00:44:49,040 --> 00:44:51,560
Speaker 1: think that some people can stay friends with an ex

1076
00:44:51,880 --> 00:44:54,600
Speaker 1: who's done them wrong and forgive them for it, move

1077
00:44:54,680 --> 00:44:57,000
Speaker 1: on and try to only focus on the good times

1078
00:44:57,360 --> 00:45:01,759
Speaker 1: and other people. And and this is with only a

1079
00:45:01,920 --> 00:45:04,319
Speaker 1: very very like maybe two of mine or three of mine,

1080
00:45:04,560 --> 00:45:07,200
Speaker 1: where I like and I say, you know what, what

1081
00:45:07,360 --> 00:45:09,279
Speaker 1: I thought was a good time I realized that you

1082
00:45:09,400 --> 00:45:13,400
Speaker 1: were cheating and doing wrong and doing horrible things. And

1083
00:45:13,920 --> 00:45:16,680
Speaker 1: I don't want your energy anywhere in my house, like

1084
00:45:16,800 --> 00:45:18,560
Speaker 1: my life or in my house. And I don't need

1085
00:45:18,600 --> 00:45:20,520
Speaker 1: to be friends with you because if you didn't respect

1086
00:45:20,640 --> 00:45:24,080
Speaker 1: me the entire time that we were together.

1087
00:45:25,600 --> 00:45:26,279
Speaker 5: Why would I have?

1088
00:45:26,600 --> 00:45:26,759
Speaker 2: Why?

1089
00:45:26,960 --> 00:45:27,000
Speaker 3: Like?

1090
00:45:27,200 --> 00:45:30,560
Speaker 1: Yeah, why? Like I respect my friends right like I

1091
00:45:30,680 --> 00:45:33,200
Speaker 1: respect you, you know, like there's stuff about you, Rick

1092
00:45:33,239 --> 00:45:36,920
Speaker 1: that I really really really respect. I respect that you're sober,

1093
00:45:37,000 --> 00:45:39,360
Speaker 1: I respect your brain, I respect your sense of humor.

1094
00:45:39,400 --> 00:45:42,200
Speaker 1: I respect like the way that you are with Tyson

1095
00:45:42,280 --> 00:45:44,480
Speaker 1: right now. You know, like there are things that I

1096
00:45:45,360 --> 00:45:48,800
Speaker 1: can't love you without respect. I'm weird that way. So

1097
00:45:48,880 --> 00:45:52,040
Speaker 1: if I don't, if I now have learned things about

1098
00:45:52,440 --> 00:45:56,080
Speaker 1: an ex that make me lose all respect for them,

1099
00:45:56,200 --> 00:45:58,960
Speaker 1: I just I don't hate them. They just fail to

1100
00:45:59,080 --> 00:46:02,680
Speaker 1: exist to me anymore. All Right, you guys, have anything

1101
00:46:02,719 --> 00:46:04,640
Speaker 1: else to add you want to talk about anything? First off,

1102
00:46:04,680 --> 00:46:06,960
Speaker 1: everybody to go order taibomb. But she obviously is not

1103
00:46:07,040 --> 00:46:08,880
Speaker 1: going to be able to make it except Rick and

1104
00:46:08,960 --> 00:46:12,080
Speaker 1: I are going to get her like a large many.

1105
00:46:13,680 --> 00:46:14,360
Speaker 5: Coming in today.

1106
00:46:14,680 --> 00:46:16,440
Speaker 1: Okay, you can pre order.

1107
00:46:18,640 --> 00:46:21,279
Speaker 2: And spokesperson here.

1108
00:46:23,840 --> 00:46:26,040
Speaker 1: I can just look at her skin. It speaks for yourself.

1109
00:46:26,480 --> 00:46:30,359
Speaker 1: I'm shining. Yeah see. Anyway, thank you guys for listening

1110
00:46:30,440 --> 00:46:33,200
Speaker 1: to another episode of Let's Be Clever. Shanna Doherty, Thanks Rick,

1111
00:46:33,400 --> 00:46:37,560
Speaker 1: Let's let's be Let's be clear yet clear clear? Yeah,

1112
00:46:37,800 --> 00:46:41,280
Speaker 1: let's be clear with Rick and Tyson