Speaker 1: Help I Suck Good Dating with Dean Angler and I
Speaker 1: Heart Radio Podcast. Hello everyone, thank you for joining us
Speaker 1: on this week's episode of Help I Suck at Dating.
Speaker 1: Joined in studio by two very lovely ladies. Hello. Hello.
Speaker 1: Let's start with Vanessa, permanent fixture of this podcast which
Speaker 1: has just been fabulous, and a very special guest who
Speaker 1: you probably will listen to on the almost famous podcast
Speaker 1: this we can think her rock and hoops as big
Speaker 1: as as her head waters the Vega The Vega Friendly Podcast.
Speaker 1: Where did you get those hoops? I love them? Oh m.
Speaker 1: Hoop Nation by alexis coming out? What? Oh? I know, guys,
Speaker 1: I'm so excited. This is like I've invested a lot
Speaker 1: of money into this, so I'm really I mean, hoops
Speaker 1: are your things? Yeah? I literally wear eyelashes and hoops
Speaker 1: how basically And this you guys are like really intellectual
Speaker 1: and like smart, so it's making me uncomfortable. So I'm
Speaker 1: not going to say for lots what's proprietary about your
Speaker 1: hoops that makes them better than other hoops, because are
Speaker 1: like good bloody, but they're cheap. They really are? How
Speaker 1: much with those? Okay? That's good? Yeah? I like yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: you know I like it. I do know. Are you
Speaker 1: going to come out with the hoops for men? I
Speaker 1: mean eventually absolutely. I feel like I feel like who
Speaker 1: bearings for men are like male rompers. I will say,
Speaker 1: so I got my male rompers that exists. It was
Speaker 1: a thing for a hot minute. Oh I think I
Speaker 1: saw what's his name wearing at stage coach? Yeah, oh
Speaker 1: alex Yeah, yeah, what's his name, Robbie, he's wearing a
Speaker 1: male romper. I think he was. I could see that.
Speaker 1: So I got my ear peers in fifth grade and
Speaker 1: my aunt made me get the hoop earring. Ye. The
Speaker 1: littles was like the Michael Jordan's es, Like, yeah, obviously,
Speaker 1: but I'm saying there's a market there for hoops for men.
Speaker 1: It bring it back, but we should know. We should
Speaker 1: note that Alexis has found love. She no longer sucks
Speaker 1: it dare im. Sorry, you guys, I don't I don't
Speaker 1: even know I'm here kidding. I mean your Instagram because
Speaker 1: you and Tyler are damn cue you guys, really are.
Speaker 1: I feel like he's a male version of you. No,
Speaker 1: no, no no, no, he's completely uppisite. He's really quiet. No,
Speaker 1: he's but I mean, like he's funny. Oh yeah, he's
Speaker 1: he's not really like I have the funny one. No,
Speaker 1: but yeah, he tries well opposite the track. Yeah he's
Speaker 1: we're kind of opposite. But he's like he has a
Speaker 1: good heart, good like good man. I think we should
Speaker 1: have Like there has to be a whole segment at
Speaker 1: some point about how they make long distance work. Well,
Speaker 1: I was just going to ask you guys that. So
Speaker 1: last night I did a live segment. I was like bored.
Speaker 1: I was cooking, so I'm like, oh, let me go
Speaker 1: live on Instagram. The last a little bit he did
Speaker 1: didn't answer you. Well, I was trying to like notch
Speaker 1: up my fingers off and wait, I actually wrote some
Speaker 1: of them. One person, who was it? Someone asked, I
Speaker 1: have no coal? What do you guys think of long
Speaker 1: distance relationships? I actually love long distance relationships And we
Speaker 1: were talking about that too last time. You're like, oh,
Speaker 1: well I get to see him, and you know that
Speaker 1: I cut out of my space because we're both are independent.
Speaker 1: So like also like I work on like this week,
Speaker 1: I'm working on my website for my hoops. So like,
Speaker 1: I like, because I have a dad, I need to
Speaker 1: be alone to actually focus and he like has business too,
Speaker 1: so he does his thing, and then when we're together
Speaker 1: he seems pretty supportive. Yeah, he's so supportive. I mean
Speaker 1: I don't know anything about business. He does, so I
Speaker 1: know hoops, he knows business. So what work? What's your
Speaker 1: upsite name? Hoop Nation by Alexis dot com. Okay, and
Speaker 1: when is this going to get launched? Tuesday? Oh that
Speaker 1: is wait? What are we? Oh? Next week? Yeah? Next week?
Speaker 1: So one week right after Mother's Day? Yeah? Perfect, So
Speaker 1: buy your mom some hoops the belated Mother's Day present
Speaker 1: for the moms out there. I'll sp it up. I'm
Speaker 1: oppositely too. I can't do longest its relationship really, I'm
Speaker 1: just I'm needy. You need Wow, I didn't picture you
Speaker 1: as the needy type. Wait, what are your love languages?
Speaker 1: Well we can talk about that later too, because I
Speaker 1: know they asked you that on your Instagram live last night.
Speaker 1: They did, Oh they did. They asked me for my
Speaker 1: love life. Oh you can't van as a you can
Speaker 1: to in long distance relate to the girl. I like it, yeah,
Speaker 1: but eventually I did not Dallas. What I like Dallas? Yeah,
Speaker 1: I shave my legs, so it's okay. Okay o, good
Speaker 1: together like a Harry person. My top in your bottom,
Speaker 1: I'm lasered from the waist up. Oh really, So I
Speaker 1: tried doing laser. I did laser in Montreal, but I
Speaker 1: did the bikini area in my under arms. I only
Speaker 1: did it three times and then I started growing back,
Speaker 1: like thinly, and then I can't. I moved out to
Speaker 1: l A and everything. We'll get laser way sponsored. Come on, girl,
Speaker 1: go with it. I mean, damn me, give me. I
Speaker 1: have considered getting a Brazilian man. So let me talk
Speaker 1: about this. Are you Harry I love I love Harry men.
Speaker 1: I don't like bar nobody likes the Harry balls. Come on,
Speaker 1: I meant I believe it, Like, yeah, we're counting it
Speaker 1: down for practical reasons. So my brother, my brother goes
Speaker 1: on like a lot of like mountaineering trips, and he's
Speaker 1: like every time, well not every time, but he's done
Speaker 1: it before where he's gone for a month, and like,
Speaker 1: when you have to alieve it yourself in the wilderness,
Speaker 1: it makes more sense to have less hair, right, And
Speaker 1: he's like, he's like, I love it. He like swears by.
Speaker 1: He thinks it's the best thing ever. I was kind
Speaker 1: of like, I wonder what that must be like, Oh,
Speaker 1: can you let us know after you do it? Well, yeah,
Speaker 1: we'll do it live on the podcast. Perfect Have you
Speaker 1: ever waxed? No? I have not. Okay, I was is
Speaker 1: probably really I'm sorry, I'm sorry, very painful. I must imagine.
Speaker 1: Are you a groomer but only in the front areas?
Speaker 1: You can't trim the back areas can't. Well I'm sure
Speaker 1: you could, but it's what's the purpose of it? Where
Speaker 1: is the practicality of it? I don't like full clean
Speaker 1: like I don't like clean clean yeah, like a little yeah.
Speaker 1: I don't like it to be like I don't want
Speaker 1: to I don't want him to be super well groomed.
Speaker 1: Wants man, how did we end up here? Alexis is here?
Speaker 1: Alexis wait? I think, wait, do you have to leave?
Speaker 1: You want to leave? Okay? Well, the first ten minutes
Speaker 1: of the podcast, I love you guys dot com, I think, well,
Speaker 1: you know Alexis, Oh she's hilarious. I mean you just
Speaker 1: look at her and you just smile. Yeah. Yeah. We
Speaker 1: spent a week together in Paradise last year and there
Speaker 1: was never dull moment. And as you can clearly see
Speaker 1: she just continues with the humor and alexis potty jokes
Speaker 1: and gotta love it. But anyways, it was good to
Speaker 1: have her. So for this next segment, we are actually
Speaker 1: going to be joined by Julian who's from evite UM
Speaker 1: and we tease it a little bit last we know
Speaker 1: you tease it on your Instagram Live a little bit. Yeah. Basically, Julian,
Speaker 1: who want to introduce yourself. Basically, what we're gonna talk
Speaker 1: about today is party etiquette and a little bit of
Speaker 1: dating etiquette hopefully as well. Oh yeah, I have lots
Speaker 1: of questions. I came prepared, okay, perfect. Yeah. So I'm
Speaker 1: Julian Um. I'm an Evite party specialist and UM. I
Speaker 1: co host a weekly show on evite on Facebook page
Speaker 1: called vit i Rol, which is amazing. First of all,
Speaker 1: I was checking the website. Evite has been around you
Speaker 1: guys for twenty years. Yeah, we're celebrating our twenties birthday
Speaker 1: this year. That's insane. I was, um, like a really
Speaker 1: bad at math. That was ten when it came out, Dean,
Speaker 1: Hold are you like five seven seven? Thanks Vanessa? But
Speaker 1: who would have thought like you? I was twelve. I
Speaker 1: feel like another level of comfort right now? Yeah, so
Speaker 1: you know, um, alright, so can you I actually looked
Speaker 1: at a couple of the videos. Um wait, there was
Speaker 1: one that was really interesting because I was like, oh
Speaker 1: my god, that's totally me. How to go st a party?
Speaker 1: So I was like, oh, what does that mean? Like
Speaker 1: like not going to a party? Now? How do you
Speaker 1: leave a party? So? I come from a big Italian family?
Speaker 1: Oh really Italian? Well my mother my father's clark. My
Speaker 1: mother is a jeezy just super which part of Italy
Speaker 1: Northern Genoa, Genoese? Okay, I'm southern, so I'm have a
Speaker 1: hard head. Yeah, spending wrong with that, but we also
Speaker 1: like we're it's always awkward when you're the first person
Speaker 1: that wants to leave a party. You don't want to
Speaker 1: be the first person to break the ice. So can
Speaker 1: you give us like the dues and dones of how
Speaker 1: would you go ust to party? That's a great question.
Speaker 1: So I think the most important thing is don't definitely
Speaker 1: be the first to leave. How do you not at all?
Speaker 1: I feel like that you don't want to be the
Speaker 1: first person to jump ship. I think though you wait
Speaker 1: to like the atmosphere is a little quiet and then
Speaker 1: I think you just look for like a quick exit
Speaker 1: and get out of there. I think you usually like
Speaker 1: snap a picture of the party in that way when
Speaker 1: you're leaving. You can text them later saying hey, I
Speaker 1: had a great time, thanks for having me there, and
Speaker 1: then they're like, okay, so they actually showed up. I'm
Speaker 1: glad about that. I um, yeah, I still haven't mastered that.
Speaker 1: I guess I have to try that. I'm the king
Speaker 1: of the Irish exit. Whenever at a bar with all
Speaker 1: my friends. Yeah, well that's what we call it. At
Speaker 1: least one emeralds around, they're still partying hard. I just
Speaker 1: ordered Ubert, don't say word to anyone and just check.
Speaker 1: See that's what I'm bad at. So I've been in
Speaker 1: our culture. You have to say bye to everybody. So
Speaker 1: even if you had a party with like fifty people,
Speaker 1: you have to go around and kiss, kiss everyone on
Speaker 1: the cheek and you know, say you're good byes. So
Speaker 1: I'm not used to I guess doing the Irish exit exit. Yeah.
Speaker 1: I think sometimes you say like hey, I have to
Speaker 1: take a quick phone call outside real quick, or sometimes
Speaker 1: you just say I have to go use the restroom,
Speaker 1: and then you just restrooms. That was a good one
Speaker 1: with me, and people believe it. Yeah, bathroom is that rude?
Speaker 1: Just vanish? I mean it maybe a little rude. At
Speaker 1: the same time, like, I think you should also look
Speaker 1: out for yourself. I don't think you wanna have to
Speaker 1: go through goodbyes with like twenty or twenty five different people.
Speaker 1: I think the more you get out the better, and
Speaker 1: then only that the party host doesn't have to worry
Speaker 1: about like going through the process being like thank for
Speaker 1: coming and everything. They can go back to join the party.
Speaker 1: I guess enough for years. I my move was I
Speaker 1: have to get something out of my car. That's one.
Speaker 1: People have found it very charming. We took a poll
Speaker 1: and everyone everyone. But that's what kind of questions you
Speaker 1: have for Julian. Oh well, okay, so I know there's
Speaker 1: like another video that you guys have what to do
Speaker 1: when you run into your ex at a party, which
Speaker 1: I found hilarious. At one point it was don't let
Speaker 1: your ex no you've been secretly stalking them on Instad's true. Yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: I think we all kind of Yeah, so it's like, oh,
Speaker 1: you know, don't act as if you know anything that's
Speaker 1: going on in their life, like just casually asked them like, hey,
Speaker 1: so you know, how's it going with work? So I
Speaker 1: wanted to actually ask you, how would you since this
Speaker 1: is you know, help I secon dating. So you're at
Speaker 1: a party and there's like someone that you're like, oh,
Speaker 1: really attracted to. How would you approach them and possibly
Speaker 1: get their contact info? Is it now more appropriate to
Speaker 1: ask them for their Instagram had ndle, their Twitter handle
Speaker 1: or do you just you know, go old school and
Speaker 1: ask them for their number? I think you go old school.
Speaker 1: I don't. I was listening to Your Guys last episode,
Speaker 1: and so many people were saying how happy they were
Speaker 1: when men come up to them and they're just really
Speaker 1: like and you know, hey, this is my name, I'd
Speaker 1: love to take you out or something like that. And
Speaker 1: I think that's what people should start doing. I think
Speaker 1: it almost makes you more authentic. I don't know. When
Speaker 1: you if someone wants to come up to me and
Speaker 1: be like, hey, so what's your Instagram handle? I'd be like,
Speaker 1: is this someone I really want to invest some time?
Speaker 1: And I feel I don't know deed. So if you
Speaker 1: were to ask a girl for her number and she
Speaker 1: would respond, well, um, because this is what I I
Speaker 1: kind of do. Sometimes I'm like, well, I don't want
Speaker 1: to give out my number, but we can become Instagram friends.
Speaker 1: Is that Is that a turn off? Is that? I
Speaker 1: think that's an appropriate way to handle it too, because
Speaker 1: then you have the opportunity to creep their Instagram a know,
Speaker 1: a little bit more about them, a little more about them,
Speaker 1: and then the d M works just as well as
Speaker 1: a text message. So that is true. It kind of
Speaker 1: allows a little bit more of a comfortability between the
Speaker 1: two of them. But I do appreciate that the tradition
Speaker 1: ality probably not a word of just giving is a
Speaker 1: word or asking for a phone number, um, just because
Speaker 1: I feel like we're moving away from a lot of
Speaker 1: things that we used to do that obviously we're proven
Speaker 1: to be successful and now we're kind of adopting our own,
Speaker 1: you know, millennial ways of doing things, and it's just,
Speaker 1: you know, I think it's important also stand out from
Speaker 1: the crowd. I mean, if you're hopefully you're floating with
Speaker 1: someone who you know is super attractive, and so you
Speaker 1: want to make sure that you're not just another number,
Speaker 1: you know, you know, you don't want to make sure
Speaker 1: that you're just not like follower nine hundred or follower
Speaker 1: A thousand and twenty. You want to make sure, like, hey,
Speaker 1: this is actually someone who who is invested in seeing
Speaker 1: this go somewhere. So this EVI I r L that
Speaker 1: you do every other Friday. You said, what do you
Speaker 1: guys typically talk about on that besides we uh no,
Speaker 1: go ahead, I'm sorry. Like this, like this party etique
Speaker 1: type stuff, is that mostly what it is? Or is
Speaker 1: specific situations that you might find yourself in. It's really everything.
Speaker 1: I mean, we jump from party etiquette. We we invite
Speaker 1: guests on to make different recipes, food, drink, We do
Speaker 1: a lot of challenges like party fail stuff like that.
Speaker 1: We try and just try to make it feel more
Speaker 1: realistic and relax. I feel like a lot of times
Speaker 1: people get so stressed out when they're plenty the party
Speaker 1: has to go perfectly, and parties aren't like that. Life
Speaker 1: isn't like that. So I think we try to stress like,
Speaker 1: have fun, enjoy yourselves. It's just a good time nice. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I mean I definitely enjoyed myself at most of the
Speaker 1: parties I go to. Tuesday Saturday night, Vanessa sends me
Speaker 1: a video of her probably two fifty feet away from me,
Speaker 1: just zooming in very slowly, very slowly, and then there
Speaker 1: it is like a mosh pit with me and all
Speaker 1: my friends is jumping up and you couldn't be missed.
Speaker 1: I was like, I have to send him this. It
Speaker 1: was too good. But you did have a good time.
Speaker 1: I still have blisters. So last week we had Tiffany
Speaker 1: and Caleb um for the greatest wedding ever donated. They
Speaker 1: had their wedding on Saturday. We both attended and I
Speaker 1: still have blissers on my feet for dancing the entire night.
Speaker 1: It was such a beautiful event. Yeah, two great people,
Speaker 1: Dean's friends. Yeah, no, it was wonderful. Yeah I did.
Speaker 1: I did. Um So, do you want to talk to
Speaker 1: us about any other videos that you guys have? Yeah,
Speaker 1: so if you um so, We we have so many
Speaker 1: different videos we have. We obviously do like a lot
Speaker 1: of d I Y s and recipe would do a
Speaker 1: lot of original stuff. We interview a lot of experts
Speaker 1: in their field and we're just trying our best for
Speaker 1: people who are planning parties or planning get together is
Speaker 1: trying to make it a little easier for them to
Speaker 1: have the initiative to want to hang out with people connect.
Speaker 1: I feel like nowadays so many people are connected through
Speaker 1: phones and computers and your tablet. You don't have the
Speaker 1: opportunity to see people face to face. I feel like,
Speaker 1: and that should be sorry, and I think I interrupted.
Speaker 1: I think that should be when I want to So
Speaker 1: I have a roommate out in l A and we're
Speaker 1: always like, oh, we want to throw a party. We
Speaker 1: want to be you know, a hub where people come
Speaker 1: and meet each other and you create new friendships. And
Speaker 1: I think that's a great way to to meet maybe
Speaker 1: a significant other. Yeah, I think it's so many times
Speaker 1: we're just stuck by being like, you know, someone met
Speaker 1: so and so on a dating app or or someone
Speaker 1: was connected by a friend they met on Instagram. And
Speaker 1: I think, uh, we should pride ourselves to get out
Speaker 1: a little more. You don't know who you may meet.
Speaker 1: It may just end up being a friend, but that
Speaker 1: friend may connect you with the person he may may
Speaker 1: fall in love with now that hit it with. So,
Speaker 1: So here's my issue with I think I have party
Speaker 1: phobi like throwing a party phobia. I hate throwing parties
Speaker 1: for the simple fact I'm scared no one's going to
Speaker 1: show up. That's that's an ego thing, right is it. Yeah.
Speaker 1: I mean when I did my charity, I was like,
Speaker 1: no one's going to show up and think anythink it
Speaker 1: blows back down to ego. Yeah. I think it's because
Speaker 1: you're it's like, you don't want to fail at something,
Speaker 1: and also you're putting yourself out there. You don't want
Speaker 1: to be like, if there are there will be people
Speaker 1: who will come. You don't want there to be like
Speaker 1: three people at a party and then everyone's like, oh
Speaker 1: my god, this loser through a party. But that never
Speaker 1: really happens. There's always a lot of people that show
Speaker 1: and so that leads me into my second fear of
Speaker 1: throwing a party is that if people do show up,
Speaker 1: that I just throw a bad party. So it's good
Speaker 1: so EVI offers the support and like the information that
Speaker 1: kind of allows you to have an exciting party for
Speaker 1: your friends. Yeah. I mean, I think at the end
Speaker 1: of the day, if you're inviting over good friends and
Speaker 1: good family to celebrate, I think a party can never
Speaker 1: really be bad. I think, trust me, I can probably
Speaker 1: throw a pretty bad party. I mean, but I think
Speaker 1: there's something really special and having also like a party
Speaker 1: that maybe a little bad. I mean a party where
Speaker 1: someone breaks something or something embarrassing happens. I mean those
Speaker 1: are the ones that you end up telling the stories
Speaker 1: about for you. Can you and you share a story
Speaker 1: about maybe the most memorable party that you've been to. Yes, okay, So, um,
Speaker 1: one Halloween, I threw a Halloween party where I was
Speaker 1: going to propose to my husband, and UM, it was
Speaker 1: so embarrassing because, um, a bunch of people showed up,
Speaker 1: and then four or five people showed up who I
Speaker 1: had no clue who they were, and and as I
Speaker 1: was proposing to them, they started chanting and screaming at
Speaker 1: the top of their lungs, like positively or what do
Speaker 1: you mean? No, It's just like they were just making
Speaker 1: noise and everything in the middle of this morning. Everyone
Speaker 1: else had who were coming, everyone else who was there
Speaker 1: and what was going on? But these people had been invited.
Speaker 1: That's what happens with every party. Friends show up with friends.
Speaker 1: And it was kind of awkward because I had to
Speaker 1: repeat the question really yeah, oh no, But I mean
Speaker 1: it would also ended up being something really cool. You
Speaker 1: you look back on it and you're like, did he
Speaker 1: not hear the first time he did? But I just
Speaker 1: was like, I want to make it clear to everyone
Speaker 1: here that this is going as smoothly as possible. And
Speaker 1: for the record, I do see a wedding band on
Speaker 1: your fingers, So that's twice. Basically, Yeah, I actually have
Speaker 1: a similar stories. So my um, I think, first of all,
Speaker 1: Halloween everyone gets a chance to really be themselves or
Speaker 1: you know, a day you can be someone else that
Speaker 1: you always wanted to be. So my sister through when
Speaker 1: I was still living at home at my mom's house,
Speaker 1: my mom was on vacation, and my sister and I
Speaker 1: were like, oh, let's throw a Halloween party since, like
Speaker 1: you know, good old school Italian family, like you're not
Speaker 1: allowed doing any of these kinds of things. So for
Speaker 1: us was like, oh my god, we're throwing a Halloween party.
Speaker 1: Mommy doesn't know, she's the way, we're going to buy alcoholic.
Speaker 1: We invited people, and that was the day my sister
Speaker 1: met her now husband and now baby daddy. Yeah, over
Speaker 1: twelve years ago. So there you go. For the listeners
Speaker 1: out there, go to parties, you know, have a party,
Speaker 1: have a party, have a party, so you never know
Speaker 1: who you'll meet, and you may end up meeting like
Speaker 1: I said, just a friend, but like that may be
Speaker 1: a great friendship you have, or that friend may introduce
Speaker 1: you to someone who's like you spend your life with.
Speaker 1: So I think either way, just like, go out and
Speaker 1: meet people. How did hang outside? How did you meet
Speaker 1: your husband? We met on Instagram? Okay, okay, we can.
Speaker 1: Can we hear that story because we've gotten out a
Speaker 1: couple of times now he lib and Tiffany last night too,
Speaker 1: last week. Oh yeah, I would love to. So he's
Speaker 1: a cookbook author and a food photographer. So he was
Speaker 1: using the hashtag food and foodie and I'm a big
Speaker 1: I love eating, and so I was following people who
Speaker 1: did that. So we connected on that and we just
Speaker 1: literally started commenting on one of his posts, I believe
Speaker 1: it was of donuts, and there's like sixty comments going
Speaker 1: back and forth, and finally asked him out in the
Speaker 1: comments in the comment Yeah, we go back looking at
Speaker 1: and we're like, no one else's commenting. So if anyone
Speaker 1: just like it, totally starts sneaking on this comment section,
Speaker 1: like oh my god, well the Instagram his wonderful marriage.
Speaker 1: You couldn't meet people through social media? We had, um,
Speaker 1: someone come on from a dating service. That was nine
Speaker 1: thousand dollars. That was last week. That was last week? Correct, Yeah,
Speaker 1: I have such a horrible memory the elite dating Dean.
Speaker 1: I'm so proud of you. I do my homework trying
Speaker 1: to say I doubt anyway. All this to say is
Speaker 1: you could meet your future ye if other it's nowadays,
Speaker 1: there's there really is no excuse to get yourself out.
Speaker 1: There's you know, we have so many opportunities to meet people.
Speaker 1: But at the same time, like, don't deny yourself any opportunity,
Speaker 1: either out of fear or if you're having trouble meeting
Speaker 1: people online, which is tough. You know, it's scary when
Speaker 1: you go on like Instagram or Facebook and like you
Speaker 1: see the perfect life people are living because they only
Speaker 1: put that out so you you know, you're tend to
Speaker 1: get a little discourage. You're like, well, I'm not living
Speaker 1: my best life personally because I know, so how could
Speaker 1: I meet this person? But in reality, we're all the same,
Speaker 1: you know, we're all fighting the same struggle. And I
Speaker 1: think you don't really realize that until you get out
Speaker 1: and actually connect with people face to face. You're like, oh,
Speaker 1: this person two is having trouble with with rent or
Speaker 1: when you know, whatever problems that we all endure. Absolutely so,
Speaker 1: so more focusing on evite. Then what do you guys
Speaker 1: typically like to because you guys kind of specialize in
Speaker 1: the party invites, but then you're now you're kind of
Speaker 1: spinning off these d A Y m all these types
Speaker 1: of recipes and stuff, right, yeah, So so what's kind
Speaker 1: of been like the staple of for the past twenty years,
Speaker 1: since you guys been around for so long. Yeah, Well,
Speaker 1: we're the leading online in texting aitation service. Our our
Speaker 1: company mission is to bring people together face to face,
Speaker 1: and while the bread and butter of our company, you know,
Speaker 1: are the invitations and allowing people to make that process easier. Like,
Speaker 1: we really believe that we want to help you make
Speaker 1: your party planning process as easy as easy as possible
Speaker 1: and encourage you to do it. I think, like I would,
Speaker 1: like we were talking about before, so many people get
Speaker 1: afraid about throwing parties or so many people think that,
Speaker 1: you know, a party is a huge endeavor and it's
Speaker 1: not you know, simple get together with Like like what
Speaker 1: we're doing right now, you know, considered in the studio, right, yeah,
Speaker 1: Like we're having a good time. We're enjoying each other's company.
Speaker 1: And the more we spend time doing that, and the
Speaker 1: way if I can teach you either to make a
Speaker 1: you know, good good recipe of a delicious food or
Speaker 1: a delicious drink, you know better. I think people when
Speaker 1: when they hear the word party, they think something like
Speaker 1: super elaborate. It could be like a dinner party. YEA
Speaker 1: many times have we gotten together with brunch? Will not
Speaker 1: us personally all that we should? You should, definitely, but
Speaker 1: I mean especially now that I know your husband loves food. Yeah,
Speaker 1: he makes so good. Don't worry about me, guys, but
Speaker 1: speaking right now, but you know, like it's it's you know,
Speaker 1: even coffee, like grabbing coffee. I think sometimes we tend
Speaker 1: to like hype everything up so much in our mind
Speaker 1: that in a way it kind of um it cannibalizes
Speaker 1: us from actually doing anything. And I feel like we
Speaker 1: shouldn't be like that. We should all just have fun
Speaker 1: and chill. Well. I love karaoke, So if I throw
Speaker 1: a karaoke party at my place, would you guys like
Speaker 1: to join? I would love to. What's your favorite song? Um?
Speaker 1: I like um Outcast? Yeah, it's like that gets the
Speaker 1: crowd going saying, I wonder all by Oasis. That's a
Speaker 1: good one, you really feel. I'm Africa from Toto. Wait,
Speaker 1: how does that go? I Kiss the Rains down and
Speaker 1: a Africa Bless the Rains. Oh my god, I've been
Speaker 1: singing this song for so much, and this is why
Speaker 1: I have to go to karaoke because I don't know
Speaker 1: any lyrics, so I need stuff up on this space
Speaker 1: there for you the entire Yeah. Yeah, so karaoke party,
Speaker 1: karaoke party, but make sure you use even Yeah yeah,
Speaker 1: I'll send you any um so do give any party
Speaker 1: words for the listeners out there. Maybe want to plug
Speaker 1: the website or anything like that. Yeah, so you know,
Speaker 1: find us on social media. We're at evid our. Our
Speaker 1: next show is eighteenth on our Facebook page. It's at
Speaker 1: ten ay and Pacific standard time. Um, so make sure
Speaker 1: to check it out. And Vanessa and I be guests.
Speaker 1: Oh my god, we love Oh my god, guys, I
Speaker 1: love d I Y stuff. Would do so much more
Speaker 1: than that, but yeah, come on, okay, no, but I
Speaker 1: know you guys also do d Y stuff. So I
Speaker 1: was like, come on, so you can use her for
Speaker 1: the d I Y stuff and you can use me
Speaker 1: for everything else. I don't know. I'm not good at
Speaker 1: d I y stuff. You know what, neither am I,
Speaker 1: So you'd be a perfect you guys should come on.
Speaker 1: When was that May? Yeah, I'm going to be in Kentucky,
Speaker 1: but the following two weeks from the following the fallow Yeah,
Speaker 1: so we're every other week a second. Yeah, don't give
Speaker 1: me that, look, Vanessa, I'm gonna a rock climbing trip
Speaker 1: to Red River Gorge. Okay, I was just wondering what
Speaker 1: was going on climbing. That's amazing. Yeah, one of times
Speaker 1: we'll go in a way, we'll have a party here
Speaker 1: inviting me to a lot of things. I don't want
Speaker 1: to over commit, but I'm down And I think that's
Speaker 1: the other thing, over committing to, like saying yes to
Speaker 1: a party that you maybe not want to think. That's
Speaker 1: super hard too, because nowadays everyone says yes to everything
Speaker 1: with the hope that like, oh, I'll just like that,
Speaker 1: And I hate myself for it too. I do it
Speaker 1: all the time, and it's like, at this you should
Speaker 1: be a little more realistic when you say yes the stuff.
Speaker 1: But at the same time, like people understand when they're
Speaker 1: throwing to get together a party when they're just hanging
Speaker 1: out that people are going to say, No, that's just life,
Speaker 1: you know. Don't don't let that stop you from having
Speaker 1: a good time. Perfect. Well, thank you for joining us, guys,
Speaker 1: for having me. I appreciate you. Thank you so much. Um,
Speaker 1: incredible story. That's two weeks in a row. We have
Speaker 1: someone that met their significant other now yeah, now husband
Speaker 1: because Caleb RT now married. Maybe one day we'll have
Speaker 1: a story like that too. No not together, not together
Speaker 1: maybe no, but you should have seen deep an interview
Speaker 1: that in stuff there's a romance and our own personal stories.
Speaker 1: I mean, I was commenting on your Instagram live yesterday
Speaker 1: to get a single. I did not see you commenting.
Speaker 1: We're actually now Facebook Instagram friends. I was like, yeah,
Speaker 1: I thought I am team Danessa over here. What about
Speaker 1: the Dean anyway? For me? Thank you, thank you. I
Speaker 1: feel politter already. I feel like our etiquette as a
Speaker 1: whole just skyrock did um if I may polite? Um.
Speaker 1: My wife said to me last night Mother's Day is Sunday,
Speaker 1: and she, my wife, is in charge of getting our
Speaker 1: parents gifts, which I know was not fair, and it's
Speaker 1: wonderful that she does that. But she does gifts from
Speaker 1: my mother, my father on Father's Day, their birthdays. She
Speaker 1: takes care of it. I'm very that's a great wife.
Speaker 1: It's a great wife. She said to me last night,
Speaker 1: your mom texted me and said, don't get me anything
Speaker 1: for Mother's Day. And honestly, I didn't have any ideas anyway.
Speaker 1: So can you just send her some flowers or something.
Speaker 1: I'm going to put that on you. I said, this fine.
Speaker 1: You know what I should get her. I should get
Speaker 1: her Sherry's berries. And my wife said, wait a minute,
Speaker 1: is that those chocolate cover berries? Yeah, okay, get those
Speaker 1: from me. Mom, whatever you want, but get those from me.
Speaker 1: So now I'm getting my mom and my wife Sherry's
Speaker 1: berries for Mother's Day. That's a great idea. And Mother's
Speaker 1: Day just three or it is on Sunday. It's on Sunday,
Speaker 1: May lucky numb. What is today Tuesday? We're talking five
Speaker 1: days and five days, and Sherry's Burriers can deliver within
Speaker 1: those five days. I did this last night, absolutely no worries. No,
Speaker 1: I mean, I agree. I think people should be considering
Speaker 1: alternative gifts for their mothers for Mother's Day. The flowers,
Speaker 1: of course, they're great, they're beautiful. Maybe you can even
Speaker 1: include the flowers with you can. I can. That's what
Speaker 1: I'm getting. I'm getting a dozen rainbow roses and the
Speaker 1: dozen chocolate covered berries, and not all the same. There
Speaker 1: are an assorted berries and you can get them in
Speaker 1: different chocolates, right, milk chocolate, dark chocolate, white chocolate. That's
Speaker 1: what all happens. And then the rainbow roses. You could
Speaker 1: also get rainbow tulips. It's about the same price from
Speaker 1: Sherry's Berries. And when I did, I clicked on the
Speaker 1: microphone in the corner, I put in the code day
Speaker 1: and there it was. It said radio deal unlocked and
Speaker 1: they're all my options. That's us. That's the radio, is it?
Speaker 1: You know? I used to buy flowers all the time
Speaker 1: for whether it's just like friends, for myself, for ex
Speaker 1: girlfriends that I was dating at the time, and I
Speaker 1: always saw that little microphone in the upper right hand corner,
Speaker 1: but I've never been able to utilize it before. So
Speaker 1: what's great now is our listeners that notice that microphone
Speaker 1: are able to do it by just putting in dating
Speaker 1: into the little microphone area. If you go to berries
Speaker 1: dot com, that's it, really berries dot com. I still
Speaker 1: can't believe they own that, and I think they start
Speaker 1: off at what they got some really great deals on there,
Speaker 1: which if you've ever gotten flowers delivered before, they're like
Speaker 1: fifty sixty seventy dollars for just a bouquet flowers. But
Speaker 1: what Cherry's Berries does is flowers and chocolates and berries.
Speaker 1: You can do, and you can do, or you can do.
Speaker 1: All of it blows my mind. So basically, what you
Speaker 1: can do is go to berries dot com to get
Speaker 1: your fresh, juicy strawberries dipped in milk, dark and white chocolate, um,
Speaker 1: whatever it is. Even the mixtures, what are those called?
Speaker 1: The swirls they do the swizzles. I'm a fan of swirls. Um,
Speaker 1: you choose your delivery day, it's guaranteed customer satisfaction always
Speaker 1: is number one for them, or you get your money back.
Speaker 1: It's more than just berries, like we've been talking about.
Speaker 1: They've added new treats like cake pops, strawberry cheesecake bites,
Speaker 1: and artisans artisanal chocolate truffles. I'm gonna say right now,
Speaker 1: my favorite dessert of all time is cheesecake. So if
Speaker 1: you guys feel like getting me one of these things.
Speaker 1: I'll definitely take the strawberry cheesecake bites gave Merries berries
Speaker 1: and and I get the so okay, so I buy
Speaker 1: you the Sherry's berries and then I get yeah, getting
Speaker 1: of the berries. Okay, that's fine. But you know, obviously
Speaker 1: what I'm gonna do is go to berries dot com
Speaker 1: and put it the code dating in save myself a
Speaker 1: little bit of money. Obviously make you really happy on
Speaker 1: on Mother's Day, which you're kind of like a mother,
Speaker 1: Like I feel like I kind of am. You know,
Speaker 1: I have like my nephew, I have my students, your students, pets.
Speaker 1: I do not have, well my sister's dog. But you're
Speaker 1: a mother, all right. But I'm getting you at Sherry's
Speaker 1: Berriers from Mother's Day one more time Barries dot com.
Speaker 1: Use code dating, get a great deal on Mother's Day,
Speaker 1: and I promise whoever you get it for, I will
Speaker 1: not be disappointed. If we can, I'd like to get
Speaker 1: rid of some of the rumors that have been swirling
Speaker 1: about you, Dean. Yeah. In fact, Eastern has seen some
Speaker 1: I know on Reddit, Reddit, what is what is one
Speaker 1: you've seen? Like for sure that we want to just
Speaker 1: bounce off and are there any truth to this or not.
Speaker 1: I've been wondering this personally as well as the members
Speaker 1: of the Internet at large. They've been pictures with you
Speaker 1: with a certain young lady whose name may or may
Speaker 1: not beginning with a letter K, named Christina, and everyone
Speaker 1: thinks you're with her Christie. No. No, And this is
Speaker 1: the thing too. We just talked. We just discussed this
Speaker 1: very briefly. There have been so many rumors circulating about
Speaker 1: me over the past seven days, and it just blows
Speaker 1: my mind where any of this stuff even comes from.
Speaker 1: I guess people are wondering what your dating life is like.
Speaker 1: I feel like I share it every day on this
Speaker 1: every week on this podcast. Yeah, but I feel like
Speaker 1: if you take a picture with someone who's like the
Speaker 1: of the opposite sex, they're gonna be like, oh, I
Speaker 1: guess they're dating. Or if they see you walking around
Speaker 1: with someone, they're going to assume you know that you
Speaker 1: guys are dating. It's I mean, I guess. But so
Speaker 1: even like on Instagram or something, sometimes it's hard to
Speaker 1: see like every comment and all that kind of stuff.
Speaker 1: But sometimes you'll see like these fake Instagram accounts get
Speaker 1: made and then leave comments like I remember this one
Speaker 1: specifically from like four or five days ago that was like, Dean,
Speaker 1: how could you You're such a jerk, Like You're making
Speaker 1: out with Kendall during the day at stage Coach and
Speaker 1: then making out with Christina later that night at stage Coach,
Speaker 1: And I'm just like looking at it, like I wasn't
Speaker 1: making out with either the people at Stage Coach. This
Speaker 1: is absolutely mind blowing and like and this, like this
Speaker 1: narrative is being put out there by people that I
Speaker 1: have absolutely no idea what they're talking about, which means
Speaker 1: people that are lesser informed see that and potentially could
Speaker 1: believe it, which is just so frustrating. That's the Internet,
Speaker 1: and I keep saying, don't believe everything you read, of course.
Speaker 1: And then and then I jump on Twitter like a
Speaker 1: day or two after that, and I see an article
Speaker 1: written by like celeb Gossip or something that was talking
Speaker 1: about how Dean and Brandy Cyrus are now dating each
Speaker 1: other and Dean is just in a data until he
Speaker 1: leaves her Bachelor in Paradise come June first, and I'm
Speaker 1: looking at this and I texted Brandy a screenshot of it.
Speaker 1: I was like, Brandy, I guess we're dating now, I
Speaker 1: don't know if you knew this, boyfriends, I think like
Speaker 1: the most alarming thing is Bachelor in Paradise. Yeah. Well,
Speaker 1: and as I've said before, and I said, we'll continue
Speaker 1: to say, there's no chance I'm going to Bachelor in Paradise.
Speaker 1: I'll maybe continue to like tease the possibility of it,
Speaker 1: but no, come on, people, there's no way I'm ever
Speaker 1: going back there. Um, it's just so frustrating. So way, Dean,
Speaker 1: you are not which, By the way, I love both
Speaker 1: Brandy and Christina and Kendall. I have never met Kendall,
Speaker 1: but I'm sure she seems like a love she seems
Speaker 1: like a lovely persons, very nice. Yeah, she's my friend,
Speaker 1: close friend. Really, because you met her, I've hugged her twice.
Speaker 1: I think that counts. It's the second hug that really
Speaker 1: breaks the Barrea. Yeah, well, okay, so you're not dating anyone,
Speaker 1: not dating anyone, You're not even talking to anyone, not
Speaker 1: like flirtatiously texting anyone or exchanging any d ms at
Speaker 1: anyone saw me at the wedding. I was just dancing
Speaker 1: around a bunch of my bros. Would you qualify yourself
Speaker 1: as single? A f single I think that's a very
Speaker 1: accurate qualification. When was the last time you kissed someone?
Speaker 1: How many weeks ago? To the dirty details, it's very dirty.
Speaker 1: Probably March March fourteen. Yeah, March fourteenth, I think is
Speaker 1: the last day that I kiss someone. Thank you for
Speaker 1: the precis. Because I left for India March fourteen or so.
Speaker 1: Whichever day that I left for India, Leslie and I
Speaker 1: drove to the airport together because she was flying back
Speaker 1: to Arkansas. And I met Leslie on Saturday. She was
Speaker 1: lovely too. Maybe that's why people don't trust you necessarily,
Speaker 1: because you did keep that relationship hidden for a while
Speaker 1: while Winter Games aired. You had to, and maybe that's
Speaker 1: why people people feel like you're not as forthcoming as
Speaker 1: you could be. But you haven't done any reality shows.
Speaker 1: There's no reason to be hiding anything at this point. No,
Speaker 1: except I mean I would I don't know. Yeah, you're right,
Speaker 1: I don't think I would hide anything even if I did. Okay,
Speaker 1: I just like I'm I'm just kind of the person
Speaker 1: that's like, if something's going on, I don't care enough
Speaker 1: to keep it secret from anyone, and I'll just talk
Speaker 1: about it. No, candle, No, Christina, no Brandy. On the contrary,
Speaker 1: we're actually I'm dating all three of them right now
Speaker 1: and no paradise, no paradise for the record. And yeah,
Speaker 1: so so we saw Leslie at the g wed this
Speaker 1: past weekend and everything was good between us. Yeah, you
Speaker 1: guys were talking we matched funny enough, you did? And
Speaker 1: oh yeah you did. She had like this dark green
Speaker 1: dress that she wore and I walked up to it
Speaker 1: and I was like, so you decided to match me
Speaker 1: this for the wedding and she was like, I honestly
Speaker 1: had no idea you were wearing that. It was like
Speaker 1: the dress that she wore out of the limo on
Speaker 1: Chon loew season And I just like randomly picked my
Speaker 1: tucks out at the tuxedo rental place and that sure enough,
Speaker 1: they're like the exact same color. Pretty funny, but it
Speaker 1: was fun. Danced around quite a bit. That was a
Speaker 1: great wedding. Vanessa burnt grilled cheese on Oh my god. Yeah,
Speaker 1: well I was hungry. I'm always hungry, like I love
Speaker 1: to eat. Actually, wait, there was a question. Oh okay, wait,
Speaker 1: so there was this article that I read and it's
Speaker 1: about um talking money talk with your significant other. And
Speaker 1: if you are going into a serious before you get
Speaker 1: into a serious relationship with someone, you should have that
Speaker 1: money talk with the person, which I think isn't that
Speaker 1: awkward to start talking about like, oh, what are your
Speaker 1: bank state statements? Like do you have any debt? Or
Speaker 1: like how much money do you save a month? And
Speaker 1: how much money do you make? Isn't that too early
Speaker 1: to have those types of conversations with someone before you
Speaker 1: get into an exclusive relationship with them? But in this
Speaker 1: in this article, they suggest that you have those conversations
Speaker 1: before you become exclusive. Hold on, there's a point of
Speaker 1: this story anyway. One of the questions was, um, what
Speaker 1: hold on? Let me pull it up here. Um, that's
Speaker 1: a good question to have when you're engaged or in that. Well,
Speaker 1: they say to have those conversations prior to that, so
Speaker 1: then it's kind of like you can escape that situation
Speaker 1: before like situation if they're horribly in debt. Yeah, I
Speaker 1: don't this is what the article was saying. I'm just
Speaker 1: like re quoting the article. But the point of this
Speaker 1: conversation was what's the thing you'll always be willing to
Speaker 1: spend cash on? And my answer to that is food.
Speaker 1: I don't care how poor I am. I want to
Speaker 1: be able to spend my money on my food. You
Speaker 1: don't mean just basic food and shelter. You mean, like, no,
Speaker 1: you want to eat good food, not even good food.
Speaker 1: I just like having a fridge full of food. I
Speaker 1: like having options, I like having snacks, I like eating.
Speaker 1: So anyway, after it's like the no point of this conversation.
Speaker 1: But after the wedding, I got home and I'm like,
Speaker 1: oh my god, I'm starving. So I made myself a
Speaker 1: grill cheese and I burnt it. So that's the conversation
Speaker 1: that we were having about my my burnt grill cheese.
Speaker 1: I thought it was a burnt piece of French toast
Speaker 1: at first, but it was my grilled cheese. Um. But
Speaker 1: that is an interesting topic, and I think that both
Speaker 1: Mark and Easton canswer that best if you want to.
Speaker 1: Of course, like, at what point in your relationship did
Speaker 1: you have a conversation with finding about finances with your
Speaker 1: significant other. I'll go first because it's a pretty short answer. Remember,
Speaker 1: my wife was very young when we first met. But
Speaker 1: you did manage to accumulate quite a bit of debt
Speaker 1: in the first couple of years of our relationship, just
Speaker 1: going to school and living out here. And there's some
Speaker 1: long story there I don't have to get into. But
Speaker 1: um I took it upon myself working at full time
Speaker 1: job at Disneyland at the time, So I paid off
Speaker 1: for debt because we all we both knew where this
Speaker 1: was going. That sounds like an amazing job. By the way,
Speaker 1: it was a great job. I hosted who Wants to
Speaker 1: Be a Millionaire? Show What Yes at disneyl Hand on television.
Speaker 1: I'm sitting next to a celebrity, That's right, and uh,
Speaker 1: it was the best job I've ever had to this day.
Speaker 1: But anyway, um, so, so we took care of that
Speaker 1: because if you're both on the same page, then everything's fine.
Speaker 1: And so I paid our stuff off because I don't
Speaker 1: want that to be I don't want to be saddled
Speaker 1: with that once we do get married. Let's take care
Speaker 1: of that, because I feel like, if they're the one
Speaker 1: and the love is there, there's no situation financially you
Speaker 1: can't work through together. Eastern we are. You know, my
Speaker 1: wife and I had been friends for almost a decade
Speaker 1: before we started dating, and uh, we already knew each
Speaker 1: other's situation. Just from that, Like it came just over
Speaker 1: the years, Like she'd be like, oh, my student loans
Speaker 1: really suck. This is how much I owe in student loans,
Speaker 1: and like I don't have much debt on my playing card.
Speaker 1: But when we got engaged, we like sat down and
Speaker 1: compared and hash out the numbers, but like it wasn't
Speaker 1: anything that was going to make or break. So this
Speaker 1: was post engagement though. Yeah, so like the actually the
Speaker 1: time we actually had the conversation was when we realize
Speaker 1: our finances would be join, you know, we'd be combining things.
Speaker 1: I guess you want to make sure I didn't have
Speaker 1: like a secret account or something like that. It is
Speaker 1: definitely an interesting topic. But like for me specifically, I've
Speaker 1: been pretty poor, like my entire life growing up until
Speaker 1: I was twenty four years old, I've been like I
Speaker 1: live paycheck to paycheck, uh, and certain yeah, of course,
Speaker 1: so I ended up until probably like right around when
Speaker 1: I moved to l A. And even then, like I
Speaker 1: was still like struggling but doing better for myself. Um.
Speaker 1: And so it's always been kind of like a sensitive subject,
Speaker 1: I guess just because I wasn't super confident with where
Speaker 1: I was at. Um. But things have gotten better obviously recently,
Speaker 1: and I think I'm open more to discussing it, but
Speaker 1: not to the point where I'm like sharing my bank
Speaker 1: account information with anyone that I'm dating. Just yeah, I
Speaker 1: feel like that's like an engaged thing. I mean, I
Speaker 1: don't know. That's why I was asking throwing the question
Speaker 1: to you guys, because I don't know when the right
Speaker 1: time is to ask these kinds of I mean, they're important.
Speaker 1: It's an important to cover, especially because I'm such a saver.
Speaker 1: I save like of what I make. Yeah, I'm like, so,
Speaker 1: I you know, my when my grandparents immigrated from Italy,
Speaker 1: they came into Canada with like nothing flip flops and
Speaker 1: they just you know, they made their way, and um, luckily,
Speaker 1: you know, we have the life that we have thanks
Speaker 1: to my grandparents. So Ever, since you know, I was
Speaker 1: fourteen and I got my first job, my grandfather told me, like, Okay,
Speaker 1: this is how you should manage your money. So I've
Speaker 1: always been very I wouldn't say stingy, but I've been
Speaker 1: very careful with what I spend. Um. So yeah, for me,
Speaker 1: it's important to be with someone who appreciates the value
Speaker 1: of a dollar. That's a deal record for a lot
Speaker 1: of people. If somebody's are real spendthrift and the other
Speaker 1: person is super frugal, you're gonna have problems. It's funny
Speaker 1: that we bring this up to because just so, I
Speaker 1: had my therapy appointment yesterday, four weeks in. By the way,
Speaker 1: it's going really well. And she talks about how not
Speaker 1: only is she like a relationship and like a regular
Speaker 1: type of therapist, she's also a career therapist in a
Speaker 1: financial therapist as well. I guess which is a thing.
Speaker 1: Maybe I'm butchering the title of No, you're right, this
Speaker 1: is what it says in the article financial therapist. Yeah. So,
Speaker 1: so we talked a little bit for maybe like twenty
Speaker 1: minutes about my spending habits and how all of us
Speaker 1: are basically, uh, products of our parents. Like the way
Speaker 1: we watched our parents spend is basically how we learned
Speaker 1: how to spend our money as well. Um, And it's
Speaker 1: just it was so interesting to hear, like because Vanessa
Speaker 1: says she's a saver, which is incredible, eight percent of
Speaker 1: every dollar you make, you basically save. For the most part,
Speaker 1: I was also living at my mom's house though, so
Speaker 1: I wasn't paying rent. Yeah, and I'm super lomaintenanced to
Speaker 1: like I don't really have much to pay every month
Speaker 1: other than rent and maybe like insurance whatever it is. Um.
Speaker 1: But yeah, she was like we were like sat down.
Speaker 1: She's like, so, what have you been buying lately? And
Speaker 1: I was like, going through it, I was like, holy cow,
Speaker 1: I'm spending way too much money, money that I never
Speaker 1: would have spent before. But like, you always spend within
Speaker 1: your means, I guess. So that's something that I'm currently
Speaker 1: working on with my therapist now, is to control the spending.
Speaker 1: That's a danger that we were we run into as well.
Speaker 1: If you make more money, you spend more money, but
Speaker 1: you don't have to. The key the key, it seems like,
Speaker 1: and I've been told this and I don't live this,
Speaker 1: and I wish I did. The key to long term
Speaker 1: wealth and prosperity is to live below your means. Yes, yeah,
Speaker 1: is to kind of keep spending like you were before
Speaker 1: and just put away as much as you play. It's
Speaker 1: hard to think long term though, it is, especially when
Speaker 1: the money's coming in right. Well, you never know like
Speaker 1: when the money's going to stop, right, So I always say,
Speaker 1: like I was comfortable when you know, I was teaching
Speaker 1: and I was making the salary that I was making.
Speaker 1: I was very careful with what I was spending. And
Speaker 1: now I'm like, I'm still going to act that way.
Speaker 1: I'm still gonna act like that's smart. Yeah, that's super respectable. Yeah.
Speaker 1: But that's the thing I want to be able to.
Speaker 1: You know, the person that I'm with, I want to
Speaker 1: make sure that they are also that and you know,
Speaker 1: have that mind frame too, because they say the number
Speaker 1: one cause of divorce other than like lack of communication
Speaker 1: is financial problems and like maybe secrecy when it comes
Speaker 1: to finances and stuff. Certainly the biggest argument arguments, Yeah,
Speaker 1: is that to any varying degree, like if he spends
Speaker 1: a little bit more, a little bit less, you're okay
Speaker 1: with it? Or does it have to be kind of
Speaker 1: like spot on? No, I just don't. I'm not materialistic,
Speaker 1: so I don't care if you have like a Porsche,
Speaker 1: you know, like, don't spend money on a car when
Speaker 1: for the record, let me just say this real quick.
Speaker 1: I drove Venessa home last week. No hold on the
Speaker 1: car felt like it was breaking down, Like is your
Speaker 1: car going to break down on the way to my
Speaker 1: apartment right now. I'm like, no, it's just a Jeep Vanessa.
Speaker 1: They're allowed in there. It's three okay, No, But it
Speaker 1: was like it didn't have doors and stuff, so I
Speaker 1: I like it didn't have a roof that I was scared.
Speaker 1: I was like, there's no roof. It's a jeep, you guys,
Speaker 1: and I had didn't have doors once I put the
Speaker 1: doors back on last week. I love your call you
Speaker 1: right now, I'm not I'm not backpeddling. He doesn't need
Speaker 1: to have a Porsche. But I'm gonna whatever. Let's go
Speaker 1: on to the next segment. That thing up yourself, didn't you? Um? No,
Speaker 1: I did not. I bought it lifted and had already
Speaker 1: big thirty threes and all that kind of stuff on it.
Speaker 1: But I do plan on dropping a diesel engine into
Speaker 1: it pretty soon. Yeah, baby, Do you spend money on
Speaker 1: a gym membership? Um? I just cancel my gym membership
Speaker 1: because I think I'm going to be getting one through
Speaker 1: Beach Body. Wait for real, have you heard of Beach
Speaker 1: on Demand? They're awesome. You don't even tell me you
Speaker 1: don't even need a gym membership. Basically, what you do
Speaker 1: instead of going to a gym and being in that
Speaker 1: freaking iron cathedral with so many other people waiting your
Speaker 1: turn to use the workout equipment whatever it is you used,
Speaker 1: Gonna work out at home just basically like logging on
Speaker 1: a Netflix or something like that, you log onto Beach
Speaker 1: Body on Demand. They have a bunch of stuff like
Speaker 1: P nine Yes in Sanity, twenty one day Fix, hip
Speaker 1: hop abs, which I've been practicing a lot lately for
Speaker 1: two reasons. One because I really want apps and two
Speaker 1: because I really want rhythm, and one of that are coming.
Speaker 1: The rhythm maybe not so much one is more the other, right,
Speaker 1: but you know what, I'm still gonna fight it and
Speaker 1: try and get it either way. Um, there's hundreds of
Speaker 1: effective workouts on there, from bodybuilding to weightlifting, to to
Speaker 1: yoga to even dance workouts. Like I said that hip
Speaker 1: hop as ads work out, they're usually like ten minutes,
Speaker 1: maybe a little bit longer than that, depending on kind
Speaker 1: of what you're looking for. But like I said, I
Speaker 1: love them. I basically canceled my gym membership solely because
Speaker 1: I loved Beach Body on Demand so much. Um. There's
Speaker 1: over one million people currently on beach Body on Demand.
Speaker 1: And to our listeners right now, out of help. I
Speaker 1: suck at dating. You can try absolutely free if you
Speaker 1: text Dean to thirty thirt thirty. I'm sure you guys
Speaker 1: have heard me talk about it before. That's d e
Speaker 1: An too. Three zero three zero three zero. Um, maybe
Speaker 1: log on and hip hop abs. I do it every
Speaker 1: morning at seven am. So if you're you know, in
Speaker 1: the West Coast time zone, and you're up at seven
Speaker 1: am and you want to do hip hop apps work
Speaker 1: out with me. We can kind of pretend like we're
Speaker 1: in the same room. I'm going to be texting this.
Speaker 1: I want I want this, So think about a think
Speaker 1: about you know, you watch Netflix, you started one place,
Speaker 1: you finish it on your phone, you finish it on
Speaker 1: your ipadt you fish in a hotel room somewhere. Is
Speaker 1: the same idea. I have yet to use Beachbody on
Speaker 1: demand on a public transit system, but I think that
Speaker 1: might be the next step. You're gonna be clenching your kegles.
Speaker 1: I'm doing kegles right now. As a matter of fact,
Speaker 1: you guys don't do that. We have them, we can
Speaker 1: do I've I've I'm very confused. I've done them before.
Speaker 1: In college when I was curious about what would happen. Um, anyway,
Speaker 1: it's go ahead and text Dean to three zero three
Speaker 1: zero zero. You can try beach Body on demand and
Speaker 1: get some sweet hip hop abs just like me. Um,
Speaker 1: give it a try. I promise you won't regret it.
Speaker 1: Summers right on the corner. So now's the time to
Speaker 1: sign up? Yeah, I wait for real? Yeah? Men, do
Speaker 1: this are the well? Both hold on so I can
Speaker 1: get this for free. I'm all about the bree You
Speaker 1: can get full access the entire platform. Yes, okay, absolutely free.
Speaker 1: I will do that. But keegels, yeah for what your
Speaker 1: but I just I just looked it up as a
Speaker 1: matter of fact, No you can't. It improves endurance, oh
Speaker 1: right right right, yes, yes, yes, yes, I know what
Speaker 1: else is it improve? It? Endurance and well and also
Speaker 1: just like really, I don't know. I think it has
Speaker 1: benefits in the bedroom. I think there's also benefits I
Speaker 1: don't know, longevity, like longevity, Um, like when you have
Speaker 1: to go pee that you can hold it better. Yeah,
Speaker 1: called again, I was thinking incontinence. Yeah, in continence when
Speaker 1: you can't hold it her that ke muscles can help
Speaker 1: if you're having trouble holding it, or if you're dribbling, Oh,
Speaker 1: that's news to me. I always thought of it more
Speaker 1: of as a performance thing. I think that's also a
Speaker 1: reason people exercise those muscles. She would keep talking about
Speaker 1: this or John move on to something else. I just
Speaker 1: thought it was something you could do on public trends
Speaker 1: that when no one one knows you're doing it. That's
Speaker 1: why I brought it up. Hey, we got some emails
Speaker 1: that I feel like we should read because people want
Speaker 1: your advice. I hope they asked about les On there.
Speaker 1: Kira says, I had a really good friend who was
Speaker 1: seeing a guy for a few months, but broke things
Speaker 1: off with him because she didn't think they were compatible.
Speaker 1: I had become really close with this guy. He told
Speaker 1: me he didn't want our friendship to end, and my
Speaker 1: girlfriend said she had no problem with him and I
Speaker 1: staying friends. Well, I developed feelings for him. We talked
Speaker 1: to every single day. He was very flirty with me
Speaker 1: and always initiated plans to hang out. I noticed my
Speaker 1: girlfriend stopped wanting to hang out with me, but when
Speaker 1: we were in the same group, she acted like nothing
Speaker 1: could changed. Six months later, the guy tells me he's
Speaker 1: seeing my friend again. I didn't even know they were
Speaker 1: on speaking terms. They've been dating for almost a year now,
Speaker 1: and she has completely cut me off and refuses to
Speaker 1: talk to or acknowledge me even in groups. I don't
Speaker 1: hang out with her boyfriend one on one anymore, but
Speaker 1: he still texts me every single day. If they're a
Speaker 1: way to get over him without losing this friendship? Also,
Speaker 1: do you think I should try to repair my friendship
Speaker 1: with the girl? I do miss her? Oh? This is tangled? Um. Well,
Speaker 1: the one thing that stood out when she said I
Speaker 1: end up developing feelings for him. We talked every single day.
Speaker 1: I always say this, be careful who you hang out with,
Speaker 1: because you might just start liking them for sure. So
Speaker 1: I think on like, you're gonna stop hanging out with
Speaker 1: new people because you might develop feelings for them. Well, no,
Speaker 1: I'm just saying. I think when it comes to like,
Speaker 1: if you have like you know, you kind of have
Speaker 1: like that kind of there is some sort of chemistry
Speaker 1: and the longer you hang out with them, yeah, I
Speaker 1: think it is for a girl to romanticize the Relationship's
Speaker 1: gonna say right now, you probably should uber back to
Speaker 1: your apartment. Because I'm worried that we're going to develop
Speaker 1: feelings for each other. That's how ridiculously ridiculous. No, this, no, Sean,
Speaker 1: I talked to you on Tuesday's. I do not talk
Speaker 1: to you every single day like zero. This is obviously
Speaker 1: is a little b different of a situation because they
Speaker 1: talk every day. But you still shouldn't, I don't know,
Speaker 1: continue to continue your life. Well that was wait, that
Speaker 1: was my thing one to UM, I do find it?
Speaker 1: Hold on it does my girlfriend stopped wanting to hang
Speaker 1: out with me, so I obviously I think that at
Speaker 1: that point your friend Kira was starting to talk to
Speaker 1: the guy again, and probably because she knew that Kira
Speaker 1: and this guy we're talking every day, and so she
Speaker 1: gets a little jealous, maybe a little bit possessive, and
Speaker 1: she's like, actually want this guy back now? Yeah, well,
Speaker 1: I think here you have to ask yourself what's more
Speaker 1: important to your friend, the friendship with the guy or
Speaker 1: your friendship with the girl. And to me, I think
Speaker 1: it would be that your friendship with the girl, because
Speaker 1: that's who you were friends with before you got introduced
Speaker 1: to UM. I agree, it sounds like the friendship with
Speaker 1: the girls a little more important than with the guy. Yeah,
Speaker 1: but I think they're both doomed. I'm afraid as friendships go,
Speaker 1: I think it's over for both of them. And I'm sorry.
Speaker 1: And we talked about this on Scrub and in this week.
Speaker 1: Friendships have there's seasons for life, for everything. As time
Speaker 1: you pointed out, some friendships are only meant for a
Speaker 1: certain part of your life and want for your whole life.
Speaker 1: And that's okay. And if it's meant to be, you
Speaker 1: guys will find your way back to each other. But
Speaker 1: it's not worth losing your mind over. That's true. So
Speaker 1: do you think what I suggest, Kira maybe blocks the
Speaker 1: guy's number or is that too drastic? Nah? It just
Speaker 1: sets the precedent and sets the You know what I
Speaker 1: would do, I would be the bigger person and write
Speaker 1: to them being like, hey, guys heard you're back together.
Speaker 1: I wish you guys the best of luck. Hope you're
Speaker 1: happy and smiling. Kira, so put him in a group
Speaker 1: chat or yeah, maybe a group or I don't know,
Speaker 1: maybe send it to your girlfriend or and and to
Speaker 1: him separately, but just or maybe a group chat so
Speaker 1: you're not, like, you know, doing it behind anyone's back,
Speaker 1: but I would be the bigger person and just send
Speaker 1: him a message. Maybe, but they've been together a year,
Speaker 1: so it might be a little aiming and that. I
Speaker 1: also I don't like that he's texting her every day.
Speaker 1: That's not about I forgot about that. So Kira, forget
Speaker 1: that group. Maybe you do block him. I think you
Speaker 1: need to move on with your life. I think you
Speaker 1: need to let him move on and focus on the
Speaker 1: relationship that he's into. Granted, maybe doesn't sound like it
Speaker 1: might be the best one because he's texting you every day,
Speaker 1: But if it sounds like nothing happened between here and
Speaker 1: this guy, so there's no real like foul play. But
Speaker 1: he seems to be kind of keeping her on the
Speaker 1: back burner just in case. Totally unfair and that I
Speaker 1: believe we call that benching, and there's we do not want.
Speaker 1: So Yeah, so I'm gonna stick with it and say
Speaker 1: heresh to block the guy. Well, now I agree. I
Speaker 1: think she should block him mentally and through text block
Speaker 1: him and move on. I think you'll be friends with
Speaker 1: her again someday, hopefully. A lot of the emails we
Speaker 1: get our boy the shore was going great and then
Speaker 1: now all of a sudden, he's cooled off to me.
Speaker 1: And here's another one of these, but I think we
Speaker 1: usually end up with he found somebody else. But anyway,
Speaker 1: this is called Subway No Response guy. Nicole is twenty
Speaker 1: four years old. She's working in New York City. I
Speaker 1: like this one because it kind of paints a nice
Speaker 1: picture of her life. It's kind of an exciting wife.
Speaker 1: She's been single for six years and ready for a
Speaker 1: boyfriend again. She met a guy on the subway in
Speaker 1: New York. The first time I saw him, we made
Speaker 1: eye contact. I didn't know what to say. We ran
Speaker 1: into each other twice in a week, and I ended
Speaker 1: up getting his number. We went out for coffee his
Speaker 1: idea this past weekend. He had mentioned something during the
Speaker 1: day about grabbing lunch. I followed up but got no response.
Speaker 1: I just thought, okay, that's the end. Another invite to
Speaker 1: dust no a big deal. However, Monday morning he texted
Speaker 1: me bright and early, so I'm a dick, I'm sorry,
Speaker 1: and you offered to make up for it. We went out.
Speaker 1: It was great. He was so apologetic about our plans
Speaker 1: from the weekend before. I texted him, thinking for lunch
Speaker 1: and a great time and he never responded. I've noticed
Speaker 1: he isn't big on his phone, and I'm not sure
Speaker 1: if it's because he's older. He's thirty one. I bumped
Speaker 1: into him twice today and we said hello, He made
Speaker 1: a joke, he went back to work. How do I
Speaker 1: bring up the whole texting thing to him? I feel
Speaker 1: like this could be a good thing. I don't want
Speaker 1: to ruin up by seeming patty and wanting a text back. Help.
Speaker 1: I suck at dating Nicole. Oh, that sounds like me,
Speaker 1: Like what do I do if I, um, dean, what
Speaker 1: would you do if your a kind of response would
Speaker 1: you want from her? I got excited about this because
Speaker 1: she capitalized subway, and so I thought she met him
Speaker 1: at a subway, and I was going to ask or something.
Speaker 1: I mean, I love subway personally. I think that. I
Speaker 1: think the common theme we see what this too, as
Speaker 1: Mark said, is it starts strong, it fizzles a little bit,
Speaker 1: and then people kind of like dwell on it and
Speaker 1: focus a little bit too much onto it. It's like,
Speaker 1: for instance, Nicole years old, lives in New York City.
Speaker 1: She's been single for six years, and so maybe I
Speaker 1: think she's putting a lot of pressure on this relationship
Speaker 1: even though it's never really taken off anywhere. I don't know. Listen,
Speaker 1: if a guy's into you, he will call you, he
Speaker 1: will text you, he will want to see you. And
Speaker 1: that's my point. That's what I'm saying. And I feel
Speaker 1: like she's putting too much emphasis on this relationship even
Speaker 1: though it's not reciprocated and it doesn't really seem to
Speaker 1: be like much is going on there, you know what
Speaker 1: I mean. But maybe because she's been single for six years,
Speaker 1: she's kind of grasping at straws and kind of hoping
Speaker 1: that this is the relationship that's going to pull her
Speaker 1: out of that single funk. Yeah. I think when you
Speaker 1: like date someone, or you one on a day with someone,
Speaker 1: or if you're in a relationship, you kind of like
Speaker 1: put up you you make excuses for the person that
Speaker 1: you're dating. But Nicole, if you put yourself outside of
Speaker 1: the situation and you know you're reading this what you
Speaker 1: just sent us, I think you would probably tell yourself like, hey,
Speaker 1: if he's not giving you the signs that he's into you,
Speaker 1: or you know, he's not giving you what you need
Speaker 1: and deserve, then I would, you know, make wait for
Speaker 1: him to make a move again, and I wouldn't. I
Speaker 1: wouldn't ask him why he hasn't texted back. And and look,
Speaker 1: I've been this guy before too. I've been the guy
Speaker 1: that gives the spreadic texts, will bump into a be casual,
Speaker 1: be polite, and be even if you're into a girl.
Speaker 1: What's what I'm saying. So let me So I've been
Speaker 1: this guy where I'll see him and be polite, be casually,
Speaker 1: be friendly, all that kind of stuff, like go on
Speaker 1: like maybe like even like a friend day hang out.
Speaker 1: It doesn't sound like they're hooking up. But just if
Speaker 1: in my position, if I was that guy, it would
Speaker 1: just mean that I'm not interested at all. And so
Speaker 1: if he's not interested in her, then she shouldn't be
Speaker 1: interested in a relationship with him right now if it
Speaker 1: doesn't seem like that's where it's trending towards. Yeah, And
Speaker 1: I don't think because he's thirty one n thirty one
Speaker 1: year old text and call and it's very it's human
Speaker 1: instinct to make excuses for these people, and we all
Speaker 1: do it, and you're doing now. I think, thank you
Speaker 1: know he's not very good at texting. Oh you know
Speaker 1: he's so busy, but like you said, if he's into you,
Speaker 1: you would absolutely know it. So I think I love
Speaker 1: how you met. That's such a cute story making eye
Speaker 1: contact on the subway at such a movie. But I
Speaker 1: don't know that this is happening right right now. Listen,
Speaker 1: I dated a guy this is pre bachelor days, where
Speaker 1: we met on a train from Toronto to Montreal and
Speaker 1: we sat like, so he had seen me five years
Speaker 1: prior to that in a line at a breakfast listen
Speaker 1: years later. Yeah, So then, like I was, I was
Speaker 1: boarding the train and I wasn't feeling well, so I
Speaker 1: had I was struggling to put my my luggage on
Speaker 1: the train. Someone tasked me from behind. He's like, hey,
Speaker 1: do you need help, and they turned around. I'm like,
Speaker 1: oh my god, it's the guy that had messaged me
Speaker 1: five years ago when he saw me in line. So
Speaker 1: we ended up sitting next to each other on the
Speaker 1: train and I'm like, oh my god, so here I
Speaker 1: am a girl even Essa romanticizing the relationship. We're gonna
Speaker 1: end up together because it's meant to be. We have
Speaker 1: such a great love story. I mean, it didn't end
Speaker 1: up working out, obviously, I went on The Bachelor, but yeah,
Speaker 1: that was That's sad though, isn't it when the great
Speaker 1: meetings don't turn into an amazing relationships? And I think
Speaker 1: that should have been great. At that point, I was
Speaker 1: just so in love with the story that I wanted
Speaker 1: it to work out because it was such a great,
Speaker 1: cute story. So what were the next steps that unraveled
Speaker 1: in the relationship. Well, he was living in Toronto at
Speaker 1: the time, I was in Montreal, so we did long
Speaker 1: distance and I think at a point we just realized
Speaker 1: we wanted we wanted the same things, but not at
Speaker 1: the same time in our life. Were at different were
Speaker 1: at different stages in our life. And for those that
Speaker 1: don't know the listeners of the podcast, Toronto is in
Speaker 1: the province Ontario and Montreal is in the province Quebec. Yes, geography,
Speaker 1: and so there's a little geography lesson for today. For
Speaker 1: for this two. Maybe all those romantic comedies we watched,
Speaker 1: you know, serendipity and where the they at the end
Speaker 1: they're so happy. Maybe it's not forever after though maybe
Speaker 1: those end poorly too. We don't see their whole lives.
Speaker 1: That's why I don't like watching movies. That's actually a
Speaker 1: funny thought that I had the other day too, is
Speaker 1: growing up. You watch all these movies, like these cute
Speaker 1: rom comms, love stories, whatever it is, but all we
Speaker 1: see is the chain up until they get together. They
Speaker 1: get together, and then the movie's over. You know, except
Speaker 1: the notebook because the spoiler Emily is she's twenty eight.
Speaker 1: She's never had a serious boyfriend. All my life have
Speaker 1: been completely open with my friends and my family, but
Speaker 1: unable to talk to and open up to people I
Speaker 1: don't know. I told myself this year I would finally
Speaker 1: put myself out there and maybe even get on a
Speaker 1: dating app. I've always had reservations about them, but I'm
Speaker 1: trying to get over that. It's it's a perfectly normal thing.
Speaker 1: I think. I'm always concerned I won't be able to
Speaker 1: keep the conversation going. I've been thinking more and more
Speaker 1: about how you always say, what is the worst that
Speaker 1: can happen? Right? That is our advice. You gotta shoot
Speaker 1: your shot. They'll say, no, we'll move on any advice
Speaker 1: for getting out there. Thank you for your insight and
Speaker 1: being so open and honest each week. It is truly refreshing.
Speaker 1: Hopefully soon I will suck less at dating. That is Emily. Oh, Emily, listen.
Speaker 1: I was talking about this last week on the podcast.
Speaker 1: If I were in a position where yes, I said
Speaker 1: that I'm dating someone, if I were in a position
Speaker 1: I did say that, is that going? So wait, I
Speaker 1: want to talk about what's what's the what's your definition
Speaker 1: of dating versus my definition of dating is like leading
Speaker 1: to possibly a relationship? Yes, okay, so I'm dating someone. Okay, Well,
Speaker 1: let's let's hear uh. We have somebody that you've heard
Speaker 1: before on this show named Erica who is now in
Speaker 1: a relationship. We talked her before when she was crushing
Speaker 1: on her oral surgeon. That's over and done with. She
Speaker 1: has a boyfriend. The definition we'll get back. We'll get
Speaker 1: back to Emily and a second. But the definition of
Speaker 1: dating someone you happened last night or two nights ago,
Speaker 1: whenever it was what the talk? No, but that's not
Speaker 1: the yeah than it was five days ago? Um No.
Speaker 1: But the definition of the definition of dating someone is
Speaker 1: before the talk happens, you're dating and now I'm in
Speaker 1: a relationship. Yeah, okay, congratulations. By the way, I don't
Speaker 1: know why people congratulate people in relationship, because this whole
Speaker 1: show was about the struggle of finding one. Yeah, and
Speaker 1: I are you happy? I'm super happy? Then congratulations, Okay,
Speaker 1: thank you. The last time the listeners heard from you,
Speaker 1: you were very not in a relationship. That's true. You
Speaker 1: were in the abyss. How long ago is that? Two
Speaker 1: weeks ago? Okay? What? No? I was very not in
Speaker 1: a relationship like seven weeks ago. Now look at her.
Speaker 1: It can happen that fast. It can happen that fast.
Speaker 1: But that's what I mean. So I am anyway, it's
Speaker 1: not about me. Let's talk about it. Okay. But then
Speaker 1: the question is for you. Are you in a relationship?
Speaker 1: You are dating? Are you in a relationship? Mark asking
Speaker 1: the hard hitting questions over here? I am dating someone
Speaker 1: and he makes me very happy. And this comes back
Speaker 1: to wait, who was it, Nicole? So the guy that
Speaker 1: I am dating? Wait wait, no, I'm actually gonna say
Speaker 1: something important here. So when I so, when I first
Speaker 1: met when I first met um, this guy that I'm dating.
Speaker 1: So last night, when I was my brain is everywhere.
Speaker 1: So last night when I was doing the live the
Speaker 1: live show on my my my Instagram, I was talking
Speaker 1: about you know, when you first meet someone the first
Speaker 1: date of the second date, You're never truly yourself until
Speaker 1: like the third or fourth date, when you can be like, okay,
Speaker 1: like I made it to the third day, let me
Speaker 1: really like shed you know, a couple of those layers,
Speaker 1: and let me start being more of myself. So when
Speaker 1: I went on a date with this guy, I didn't
Speaker 1: not want to go on a date with him. I'm like,
Speaker 1: I don't think I see myself with him. I you know,
Speaker 1: I don't think it's gonna work out. So I asked him.
Speaker 1: He asked me to go out for dinner. I was like, sure,
Speaker 1: let's go off a dinner at six because I didn't
Speaker 1: want to go for dinner later because I wanted to
Speaker 1: be in bed by like ten o'clock. I ended up
Speaker 1: staying out with him until one am, and we just
Speaker 1: were We had so much in common, and it was
Speaker 1: just so nice to be in the presence of someone
Speaker 1: who genuinely just had interest in your life as as
Speaker 1: you know, as as a teacher, as a person, as
Speaker 1: like outside of bachelor world, and and so I had
Speaker 1: such a really good connection with him. And then you know,
Speaker 1: like we're sot talking at this point. So anyways, that's
Speaker 1: what I was trying to I want to talk about
Speaker 1: that with Nicole. I had a genuine connection with this guy. No,
Speaker 1: but when Nicole was talking about like the subway girl,
Speaker 1: like he was, he was calling me, he was texting
Speaker 1: me the next day, he was, you know, like wishing
Speaker 1: me good night, making sure I got home okay, like
Speaker 1: he was. He was giving me all the signs that
Speaker 1: he was interested in. Now, Emily, if I was in
Speaker 1: a position where I was, you know, like single, single,
Speaker 1: I would definitely go on a dating app. Because that's
Speaker 1: what she was asking, right, Yeah, that's what you put
Speaker 1: herself back out there. Should she throw it out there? Yeah? Yeah,
Speaker 1: I mean why, like exactly what would what is there
Speaker 1: to lose? I mean, I agree. I think that I
Speaker 1: struggled with something very similar to Emily before. Funny enough,
Speaker 1: before going on the show, was I just didn't really
Speaker 1: open up to many people about my feelings and my
Speaker 1: emotions and all that kind of stuff, which I still
Speaker 1: struggle with. But I've gotten better at so I understand.
Speaker 1: And I think the only advice that I can offer
Speaker 1: to Emily is the more that you attempt to do
Speaker 1: it and the more that you talk about the things
Speaker 1: that you feel or the things that have affected you
Speaker 1: positively or negatively. The easier it gets every time you
Speaker 1: do it, and the stronger connections are going to build
Speaker 1: with whomever it is, whether it's a person you're dating casually, um,
Speaker 1: whether it's a potential boyfriend, or whether it's just a
Speaker 1: regular friend. I think that the more you talk about
Speaker 1: those things, the more you open up, the easier it
Speaker 1: will become. Um. That's that's my advice that I had
Speaker 1: to get her. Yeah. I think the more people you meet,
Speaker 1: the better chance you are you going to find somebody
Speaker 1: that you really like spending time with. But I think
Speaker 1: her hesitation was that she just is unable to open
Speaker 1: up about things. And that's what she said sitting in there. Yeah. Yeah,
Speaker 1: which has been completely open to my friends and family,
Speaker 1: but don't know how to open up to people I
Speaker 1: don't know, I think. I mean, yeah, it's hard to
Speaker 1: like be vulnerable and and you know, especially with someone
Speaker 1: that you don't know. But once you do it, I mean,
Speaker 1: I love being vulnerable, but also you take it one
Speaker 1: step at a time. You don't to worry about that
Speaker 1: right now. Right now, you just worry about meeting somebody
Speaker 1: you can worry about opening up to them as you
Speaker 1: come along. Now, Erica, Yes, I was just so like
Speaker 1: Mark has seen me through this entire progression of like
Speaker 1: meeting my boyfriend. I don't say that word much meeting
Speaker 1: my boyfriend, and then I was I was so closed
Speaker 1: off to it for a couple of weeks and was like, whatever,
Speaker 1: I'm just going to go on the dates. It's fine,
Speaker 1: It's fine. Um, but it's like once you really get
Speaker 1: to know someone, that's when you can actually start to
Speaker 1: like open up and have the real conversations. And there
Speaker 1: was like this one date that we went on where
Speaker 1: I suddenly was ready to open up and I almost
Speaker 1: cried to him, and we both say that was the
Speaker 1: day that like things actually got serious. So I think
Speaker 1: it takes time and it's not immediate, but you should
Speaker 1: definitely put yourself out there because it actually works. So
Speaker 1: so there you go. She didn't you know, bumble the
Speaker 1: harmony they work. I mean, you can find people. They
Speaker 1: can be frustrating, they can be um, they can really
Speaker 1: suck a lot of your time if you let them,
Speaker 1: but they also can be very successful. So we're very
Speaker 1: happily happy for do you want to do one more email.
Speaker 1: I do have one more. This is for you, Dean.
Speaker 1: You said last week you wouldn't date an eighteen year old,
Speaker 1: and that really bothered the eighteen year olds in their audience.
Speaker 1: Jen says, Dean mentioned you would not did a nineteen
Speaker 1: year for certain reasons. What about someone who's going to
Speaker 1: be twenty one is in college? Now? I think she's
Speaker 1: talking about herself, but she makes it more general. Is
Speaker 1: it the fact that they're still in school? Is it
Speaker 1: the fact that they can't go out and drink? Like?
Speaker 1: What is it about this age that bothers you. I've
Speaker 1: always been someone who dates older, but it always feel
Speaker 1: bad with My boyfriend would get up to go to
Speaker 1: work for the day and I'd get up and go
Speaker 1: to a couple of classes. And my question is for
Speaker 1: someone older, is being twenty going to be twenty one
Speaker 1: and age issue? Ps? I love the fact that Vanessa
Speaker 1: and Jared have been in the studio lately. Dean. It's
Speaker 1: such a tricky question because you can't like generalize and
Speaker 1: say everyone that's twenty one years old is too young
Speaker 1: to day seven year old. Of course, there are like
Speaker 1: certain circumstances we're like, oh, you're a very unique twenty
Speaker 1: one year old that maybe like I'm not mature, I'm
Speaker 1: I act very immaturely just generally, like on a daily basis,
Speaker 1: we can all agree with that. I think I always
Speaker 1: say guys mature kicking and screaming eventually, but that's just
Speaker 1: like that's just my regular Ben is the same way.
Speaker 1: Ben is a very mature like stand up guy, but
Speaker 1: he acts very childish and so many ways that's like
Speaker 1: his fun loving side and that we all adore so much.
Speaker 1: And I'd like, I feel like I'm somewhat the same way,
Speaker 1: maybe a little bit behind in certain areas though, because
Speaker 1: Ben obviously is um is great, but it's just it's
Speaker 1: it's hard to picture dating someone that isn't kind of
Speaker 1: that hasn't been able to experience life at that point yet,
Speaker 1: because as a twenty one year of college student, Like
Speaker 1: when I look at myself when I was twenty one
Speaker 1: and in college, I just such a shadow of myself,
Speaker 1: Like I couldn't even recognize him right now, Like we're
Speaker 1: such completely different people, you know, between the past six
Speaker 1: years from now till then, and so for me to
Speaker 1: be interested in dating someone that's at that similar walk
Speaker 1: in life that I was back then. It just doesn't
Speaker 1: even register to me, like I have no interest in
Speaker 1: in that, I guess, if that makes sense, I guess.
Speaker 1: But I also think that women are mature much more
Speaker 1: quickly than men do. I mean I I dated women
Speaker 1: in college and they were all just the same. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I mean maybe a little bit of course elevated than
Speaker 1: I was, for sure, but it's just it's still not
Speaker 1: something that I would be interested in now at this
Speaker 1: point in my life. You know, I could always speak
Speaker 1: from my experience. I have twenty six years eighteen, and
Speaker 1: we were right on the same level. So it worked
Speaker 1: for me. I think it was a different time, not
Speaker 1: to like date you or anything. That's fine, has changed
Speaker 1: quite a bit. Was ten years older than I was,
Speaker 1: Oh okay, yeah, and I was waiting warmer than him.
Speaker 1: How old were you? I was twenty four, he was
Speaker 1: thirty four, and we were like nine years apart. Sorry, okay,
Speaker 1: but you feel like you remember sure that he was
Speaker 1: at the time, and he will still admit to that.
Speaker 1: He agrees something about guys. I'm telling you when I
Speaker 1: was when I was twenty three, I went on a
Speaker 1: date with a nineteen year old and it just was
Speaker 1: so evident the age difference. Maybe that's just her though
Speaker 1: nineteen and you were three. Yeah, but I think nineteen
Speaker 1: versus twenty one. There there's I mean, it's still it's
Speaker 1: a couple of years, but I think it a significant
Speaker 1: amount of it was just one day in one person. Obviously,
Speaker 1: it's different from person to person, especially from relationships relationship.
Speaker 1: I'm just saying from my experience, I've never necessarily had
Speaker 1: a reason or a desire to date someone at that age.
Speaker 1: I say, you have to be open to it. Age
Speaker 1: is just the number. I've always been the person that
Speaker 1: said I want to date older. I want a date older.
Speaker 1: You know, what if if someone who's younger or my age,
Speaker 1: or you know, a little bit older, a little bit younger,
Speaker 1: like if we're on the same wavelength and the same
Speaker 1: path and we want the same things at the same time,
Speaker 1: I'm all for it. How old would you go? Well,
Speaker 1: let's talk about another subject. Interesting, it's pretty soon. How old? Okay?
Speaker 1: How about how young would you go? Would you dat
Speaker 1: a younger man? Yes, no problem. But I think I'm
Speaker 1: more open to it now than I was before because
Speaker 1: it has not worked out for me when guys were older.
Speaker 1: You know, I was dating three year olds, thirty five
Speaker 1: year olds, thirty six, thirty seven. Never worked out. So
Speaker 1: I'm like, well, why don't I try something different? You know,
Speaker 1: if you if you keep on the same pattern, then
Speaker 1: of course you're going to have the same end result.
Speaker 1: So I'm open to saying like, hey, you're younger. I'm
Speaker 1: not going to pretend you're younger. I'm just gonna forget
Speaker 1: about your A and I mean in the same way
Speaker 1: to just I would say like plus or minus five years,
Speaker 1: I could go down to two. I say that, and
Speaker 1: I don't necessarily fully agree with me saying it. I
Speaker 1: go up to thirty two. I guess you know what
Speaker 1: it's like. I agree that there's no expectation put on
Speaker 1: age when you're dating. I feel like, but someone that's
Speaker 1: nine twenty years old, that's just for me. Just if
Speaker 1: you click, you click. Certainly, of course, if you click,
Speaker 1: you click, it doesn't matter the age. Probably better not
Speaker 1: to not know the age until you get the conversation. Well,
Speaker 1: legal requirements that I think, well, that's true. Sometimes. Um.
Speaker 1: One thing I did want to mention before we go
Speaker 1: talking about saving money earlier, I do not actually buy
Speaker 1: lunch today because jet Blue sentence pizza, I came in
Speaker 1: an hour earlier for that pizza, just saying, given five
Speaker 1: minutes later, still enjoyed three slices. Actually, New York pizza
Speaker 1: is its own deal, and you cannot get authentic New
Speaker 1: York pizza in Los Angeles. And so Jet Blue is
Speaker 1: doing an amazing thing. They are New York's hometown airline
Speaker 1: and Jet Blue knows no one does pizza like New
Speaker 1: York and that's why they're flying their iconic taste of
Speaker 1: New York across the country to Los Angeles. Patsy's right, Yeah,
Speaker 1: Patsy's East Ham which is delicious. It was really great
Speaker 1: and really authentic New York pizza. It is the first
Speaker 1: ever coast the coast pizza delivery by an airline. Pie
Speaker 1: in the sky. They're calling at a limited time program
Speaker 1: where Jet Blue flies authentic New York pizza from Patsy's
Speaker 1: and East Haarlem across the US to select el a
Speaker 1: residence and you have to go to the Jet Blue
Speaker 1: dot Pizza. How great is that? Way is a suffix pizza.
Speaker 1: The Suffixes pizza is punch it into your computer. It's
Speaker 1: time to be alive. You have the w W w
Speaker 1: that's in there, and then WWL we got jet Blue
Speaker 1: dot Pizza. This has been a personal fantasy of mine
Speaker 1: for many from out of state, and I like, for real,
Speaker 1: and then I saw it was coming today and I'm like, oh, baby,
Speaker 1: you should go by easton dot Pizza. That's what you
Speaker 1: should do, and you don't spoil anything coming there. Like
Speaker 1: Domino's dot Pizza. There's probably you can purchase some U
Speaker 1: r L s here and start selling them making money.
Speaker 1: I think there's a lot of dots that opened up
Speaker 1: recently dot com. So you're telling me Dominoes isn't gonna
Speaker 1: want Domino's Dot Pizza And I think they're all going
Speaker 1: to want that. Yeah, for sure, I'm gonna go home
Speaker 1: and buy it right now. Well, it's from May night
Speaker 1: to the eleventh. What is today? Today is the eight
Speaker 1: Today's the eighth, So it's this week Wednesday through Friday.
Speaker 1: This week, Jet Blue is gonna satisfy cross country cravings
Speaker 1: with a limited quantity of three and fifty New York
Speaker 1: pizzas available for purchase each of the three days, more
Speaker 1: than a thousand pizzas in total. So thank you, Jet Blue.
Speaker 1: That was delicious. That was delicious. Pepperoni pizza was so good.
Speaker 1: I do love New York pizza. There is no l
Speaker 1: A pizza, really is there l A Tacos, But like
Speaker 1: there's Chicago pizza, there's New York piza. No, it's like
Speaker 1: a like a not a margarita pizza. But there are
Speaker 1: California Pizza Kitchen. They have like avocado on the pizza. No, no, no, no,
Speaker 1: John and Vinnie's I don't know jon Nis, No, I
Speaker 1: don't know. You guys have only been here a year
Speaker 1: and I know John and Um, I'm not going with streets.
Speaker 1: But it's in West Hollywood and it's like all fentic
Speaker 1: Italian restaurant, like real Italian food. It's my favorite spot.
Speaker 1: I'm going to go to all of Garden tonight or
Speaker 1: when you're there your family, or wait till tomorrow and
Speaker 1: get Jet Blue to bring me a Patsy's pie because
Speaker 1: that sounds delicious. Two days in a row. There you go. Um,
Speaker 1: this is a fun episode. There's a couple of things
Speaker 1: I want to mention before we get out of here.
Speaker 1: There has been a creation of a new Facebook group.
Speaker 1: Check it out. It's called to help I Suck at
Speaker 1: Dating to the Facebook. Yeah, it's great. Um, it's a
Speaker 1: it's a fun place, a fun form to meet like
Speaker 1: minded listeners. We can share topics and ideas. I'm not
Speaker 1: active on Facebook typically, but I do like to at
Speaker 1: least try to get on there, and I'll be say
Speaker 1: a couple of things. Get on there. We have the
Speaker 1: scrubbing in Facebook group and now there's almost famous face.
Speaker 1: I'll be very act well. And that's the thing too.
Speaker 1: I saw Becca's has like seventy seven that's insane, and
Speaker 1: so I saw that and I was like, this is
Speaker 1: a this is a great thing. And I was like,
Speaker 1: I should probably make one. And then like the next day, know,
Speaker 1: someone reach out to me on Instagram. They're like, hey,
Speaker 1: I'm part of the Becca Tilly's um scrubbing in Facebook group.
Speaker 1: Can I make one for the help I suck at dating?
Speaker 1: And of course I was naturally like, yeah, of course please.
Speaker 1: That sounds awesome. So, um, be sure to follow on
Speaker 1: on Facebook if you have any questions or you just
Speaker 1: want to talk with people that listen to the podcast
Speaker 1: as well. It's a great place to do just that. Um.
Speaker 1: There is one other thing we normally don't talk much
Speaker 1: bachelor on this podcast, which we talked about our lives
Speaker 1: through Vanessa, Me and Jared, of course. But what we're
Speaker 1: gonna do, it's gonna be kind of fun and I
Speaker 1: want actually to kind of gauge Vanessa's idea of this.
Speaker 1: Have you heard of batch bracket? Yes, So what we're
Speaker 1: gonna do is create a help I Suck at Dating
Speaker 1: batch brackett help I suck at dating group that everyone
Speaker 1: can sign up under the help I Suck at Dating
Speaker 1: group and then fill out a batch bracket. Um that
Speaker 1: will you know? It's it's obviously just like a fantasy
Speaker 1: thing like um, fantasy sports for the bache for the Bachelorette,
Speaker 1: for the new season coming up, becast season, Yes, for
Speaker 1: this season, and so we're all I'm gonna make one.
Speaker 1: You're gonna make one. We're gonna come and started to
Speaker 1: make one. Mark and Easton of course, we would love
Speaker 1: to have you make Let's do this campaign. Um, and
Speaker 1: we're gonna have a lot of listeners hopefully make one
Speaker 1: as well. And I think at the end of the season,
Speaker 1: whoever ends up getting first place, we're going to give
Speaker 1: him some sort of special prize. Oh. I thought maybe
Speaker 1: we would love to have him to the studio oh my, yeah,
Speaker 1: imagine we could. I mean we could probably fly Hi
Speaker 1: out to l A and get into the studio for
Speaker 1: an episode. I will say, I don't know if you met.
Speaker 1: We met one of Becca's guys at the wedding on
Speaker 1: Saturday and he was very nice, very very nice gentlemen. Um,
Speaker 1: and that's all we're gonna say about so anyway, So
Speaker 1: obviously Becca season doesn't start for amlier what two or
Speaker 1: three weeks, so we have a little bit of time
Speaker 1: to set this up. But if you're listening and you
Speaker 1: want to join that batch bracket, go to www dot
Speaker 1: batch bracket dot com. Um, we're going to have a
Speaker 1: help I suck at dating group made here pretty soon.
Speaker 1: And like I said, me, Vanessa, Easton, Mark, Jared, that's
Speaker 1: a lot of names, remember, Um, we're all going to
Speaker 1: make our own and no cheating, no spoilers, stay off reality, Steve,
Speaker 1: We're going to know who did that if you do it. Um. Anyways,
Speaker 1: big thank you to Julian Clark from EVA Etiquette. Check
Speaker 1: out their new videos and check out Vanessa on their
Speaker 1: d i y page next week eighteen. Thank you to
Speaker 1: Beach Body on Demand for giving me my hip hop abs.
Speaker 1: Thank you to Sherry's Berries for the strawberry cheesecake pops
Speaker 1: that Vanessa is gonna give me out of the bouquet
Speaker 1: that I buy her for Mother's Day. Big thank you
Speaker 1: to Jet Blue Pizza for putting food in our bellies today. Um,
Speaker 1: if you have any questions or you just want to
Speaker 1: email some stories that you have to to us to
Speaker 1: discuss on here, please email him to I Suck at
Speaker 1: Dating at iHeart media dot com. Thank you Alexis Waters
Speaker 1: for stopping to hoop Nation. Alexis Waters maybe our most
Speaker 1: bleep show every Um. I will not be in studio
Speaker 1: next week. I'm going to be in Kentucky rock climbing
Speaker 1: trip with my brother and his girlfriend. Vanessa's giving me
Speaker 1: a weird face Kentucky. Yes, I understand that I'm not
Speaker 1: giving you. I love Kentucky to Kentucky. It's great. And
Speaker 1: I'm going to Red River Gorge with my brother and
Speaker 1: his girlfriend and five other friends to go rock climbing
Speaker 1: for seven days. That's so fun. Yes, it is fun,
Speaker 1: So stop giving me that weird look. So wait, I'm
Speaker 1: gonna be swapping you, Jared and you, so it's me
Speaker 1: and you, and now it's gonna be me and Jared
Speaker 1: got it. Oh great, but I see how this is.
Speaker 1: I know what you said earlier. Just because you and
Speaker 1: Jared are hanging out. I don't want you guys to
Speaker 1: develop feelings for I'm ering at home. UM anyways, is
Speaker 1: anything you want to say before we part ways? No?
Speaker 1: That's oh actually wait, I didn't want I did want
Speaker 1: to say thank you. I posted this on my um
Speaker 1: my Instagram last night. My foundation No Better You. We
Speaker 1: are selling T shirts to um a school in Montreal,
Speaker 1: and all the proceeds are going directly to that school
Speaker 1: for their autism inclusion program. And we only have like
Speaker 1: largest left in a T shirts and you think there's
Speaker 1: like maybe ten left, so you guys want to buy.
Speaker 1: Thank you so much for the support. Um yeah, check
Speaker 1: it out. No Better You dot com, dot org dot org.
Speaker 1: My apologies, UM, you still have to give me a
Speaker 1: shirt so I can post on I only have the
Speaker 1: extra small with me here. But I mean you're gonna
Speaker 1: get those hip hop abs. So well. This is a
Speaker 1: fun episode. Thanks thanks for listening. Thank you Vanessa, of course,
Speaker 1: thank you very much. I'll see you in two weeks.
Speaker 1: You'll see Vanessa and Jared next week. Be sure to
Speaker 1: tune in when maybe they'll suck a little less. Follow
Speaker 1: Help I Suck at Dating with Dean Anglert on I
Speaker 1: Heart Radio, or subscribe wherever you listen to podcasts.