Speaker 1: The Black Fat Fem Podcast is a production of iHeartRadio
Speaker 1: and Doctor Sean Paul LLC. Hey, everyone, welcome to another
Speaker 1: episode of the Event podcast where all the intersections are Maddy,
Speaker 1: y'all celebrated, and I mean all of them. But I
Speaker 1: am one of your hosts, John also known as doctor
Speaker 1: John Paul, And honestly, I understand why ed Weena was
Speaker 1: always three seconds from yoking me and my brother up,
Speaker 1: because this adult and shit girl, this in this heye
Speaker 1: in this moment of time? Is this moment like I
Speaker 1: knew the nineties was bad and the two thousands was
Speaker 1: was rough. Twenty ten even I was like, ooh girl,
Speaker 1: this is a lot. But twenty twenty two and twenty
Speaker 1: dance to the twenty twenty whatever they called him, now
Speaker 1: the twenty twenty five.
Speaker 2: Get it, bitch? Why are we here? Wh Hawaii?
Speaker 1: Is we here? Anyway? How are you joho?
Speaker 2: Oh? My god, girl, y'all, it's your girl Jordan's Slash show.
Speaker 3: I am in Baltimore the Study of Charm, And tell
Speaker 3: me why it is humid and wet, like, why is
Speaker 3: it raining in a degree weather? And why is it
Speaker 3: warm rain? Why is it warm rain? Like I'm not
Speaker 3: built for this life, and yet here I am. The
Speaker 3: city is cute. Also this morning, tell me about the weather.
Speaker 3: I've said any thunderstorms all week. Today was sunny in
Speaker 3: the morning time and then it was pouring rare in
Speaker 3: the afternoon time, and that it's just thunderstorms. Make up
Speaker 3: your mind, girl, what are you well? I will it's.
Speaker 1: Cold here in California real quick. I just want to
Speaker 1: put that out there. It's like, literally, we've we've swapped weather,
Speaker 1: but go off.
Speaker 3: And I will say, it is so green here, but
Speaker 3: the Baltimore is still all the all the the lush,
Speaker 3: greener red from the work from from the world.
Speaker 2: Why the trees are damn green?
Speaker 3: It's so pretty, like the trees is not just green
Speaker 3: in California, in San Diego, this day in green here
Speaker 3: and I love it.
Speaker 2: But bitch, I am so tired. I am so Also,
Speaker 2: I am a I'm a a. I'm here for a conference.
Speaker 3: Not forget just how much conference is be taking a
Speaker 3: bitch down?
Speaker 1: Yeah, who will do it every time? But every time?
Speaker 3: But I'm I'm still here here and I'm not.
Speaker 2: On that note. Y'all.
Speaker 3: We okay, uch we do every week we give me
Speaker 3: camel her flowers and are still here segment as on
Speaker 3: a side, I've been rewatching my wife and kids and Martin,
Speaker 3: and she really eats up those roles.
Speaker 2: No one gives her her flowers, Campbell that.
Speaker 1: She is the star of that shing is.
Speaker 3: So to demonstrate that we are still here, I want
Speaker 3: to ask you, you know, we ask some questions about
Speaker 3: our girl Bee because.
Speaker 2: We we we we.
Speaker 3: We are here for bees is around these parts? Are
Speaker 3: you truly a part of the Beehive? And if so,
Speaker 3: if not, what what what lessons?
Speaker 2: Doug lessons? See what I did?
Speaker 1: There has been?
Speaker 2: What?
Speaker 1: What?
Speaker 2: What? What? What? Dia lessons? What? What? Sorry? I make
Speaker 2: sure my mind is my mind is not working? Who
Speaker 2: what that? What?
Speaker 1: What?
Speaker 2: Lessons have there been? And being in the Beehive.
Speaker 3: We talked a lot about our love for Beyonce around
Speaker 3: the show. We're talking about what but you know about
Speaker 3: being in a fandom and such. I want to know
Speaker 3: more for for us what that means for us? For me,
Speaker 3: I'll say, like, uh, I was I wasn't a Beehive member,
Speaker 3: probably until Lemonade. I always love you like to me
Speaker 3: b Days my favorite albums. Ever, I wasn't like I wouldn't.
Speaker 3: I wouldn't like Bee Hive member, but Lemonade came out
Speaker 3: and I said, like even when people people go crazy
Speaker 3: were self titled, tis not it's not my personal choice.
Speaker 3: When the Lemonade dropped, I said, oh, oh, I'm I'm in.
Speaker 3: It's not it's not not for me vibes, but I
Speaker 3: do love you.
Speaker 2: Do you love me?
Speaker 3: The Lemonade that she is amazing, And so I think
Speaker 3: right by the fandom is that like when people love Beyonce,
Speaker 3: Like I don't know, like I feel like everyoneho loves Beyonce.
Speaker 3: Just free people love Beyonce, you know, Like I feel
Speaker 3: like the people I meet high.
Speaker 2: People who like love me. I see I see a kit.
Speaker 1: I'm sorry that was so funny to me. Go ahead,
Speaker 1: I'm sorry, I'm so sorry that was so funny to me.
Speaker 1: I don't know why.
Speaker 3: That's yeah, Like I feel like that we have just
Speaker 3: like when I seeople want to be have I see
Speaker 3: people who like really love love of expressions, clebation. I
Speaker 3: think especially in the Bee I've now at like post
Speaker 3: Renaissance era and copy Coger, Like I'm seeing like all
Speaker 3: they have members who maybe felt like they were untapped,
Speaker 3: right like the queer folks and and and and and
Speaker 3: cowboy folks, and that just feels like that's just it.
Speaker 3: If the it feels so good, it feels so so
Speaker 3: good now and so much. I love us, I love
Speaker 3: us fun me a fine hot let's yes, yes, so
Speaker 3: I agree. I agree.
Speaker 1: I think being the president and CEO of the Beyonce
Speaker 1: be High Fag Club, I really think the Hive has
Speaker 1: really taught me this idea about why it's so important
Speaker 1: to protect your people, like I see like I'll see
Speaker 1: people say something out of pocket to beyond like about Beyonce,
Speaker 1: and the Hive will work together to not only take
Speaker 1: this person down, but also there's just this camaraderie of
Speaker 1: like we we protect everything Beyonce, her kids, her family.
Speaker 1: We don't really protect jay Z, which is okay because
Speaker 1: lying really I don't really see it for him like that.
Speaker 1: But I hope that one day she don't ever learn
Speaker 1: that about me. I don't really like your husband, girl.
Speaker 1: Oh and he's cool, but he's not that great anymore,
Speaker 1: very correct, says one of our producers. And so all
Speaker 1: that to be said that I kind of just eh,
Speaker 1: but when it comes to her right, we protect her
Speaker 1: I think for me it's this idea too, that her
Speaker 1: fandom has really taught me, this idea of like what
Speaker 1: it means to protect black joy, black artistry, black like creativity,
Speaker 1: black children, right, like the ways that I see people
Speaker 1: telling other white folks who critique Roomy and Blue to
Speaker 1: knock it off. The ways that I've seen people write
Speaker 1: like really some really good stories about and again we're
Speaker 1: going to get into it in our next segment talking
Speaker 1: about the ways of perfectionism, how people really break all
Speaker 1: of that down. I think for me, the work that
Speaker 1: comes to me is accountability, Like being in the Beehive
Speaker 1: has really taught me how to hold people accountable for
Speaker 1: the things that they say and do, and it really
Speaker 1: has helped me also to really check my misogyny and
Speaker 1: my massogyn the war that I take in because this
Speaker 1: world is trash, and I think it's just it's really
Speaker 1: cool to be a part of a community that really
Speaker 1: not only holds you accountable, but also allows you like
Speaker 1: I was I was telling someone earlier today, like going
Speaker 1: to Cowboy Carter, and I know you're going to be
Speaker 1: going in a couple of days. And by the time
Speaker 1: you all hear this, we have both gone. We're just
Speaker 1: we're kind of putting it out there. We're recording a
Speaker 1: little early this time around, but I was gonna say,
Speaker 1: by the time you all hear this, you know, even
Speaker 1: with Cowboy Carter still being on, it's really cool to
Speaker 1: just see the space that's been created for us to
Speaker 1: cosplay and not feel bad for getting into our our
Speaker 1: best garments and going to the tour and wanting to
Speaker 1: have a really good time. So I don't know, I
Speaker 1: just I feel like the behalf. Like you said, freedom
Speaker 1: is a really good word. Accountability is a really good word,
Speaker 1: and I think both of them, both of those those
Speaker 1: concepts have really helped me kind of evolve into the
Speaker 1: bad bitch that I am. So yes, godness, So all right, y'all. Well,
Speaker 1: with that being said, while I go change my spurs
Speaker 1: and find some more boots and and and my renaissance
Speaker 1: fan chiad, I still don't know where the hell that
Speaker 1: renaissance fan is. We are going to take a quick
Speaker 1: break and come back with the category for this week segment.
Speaker 1: We'll be back in a second, okay, y'all. So we
Speaker 1: are black and back, and this week for the category
Speaker 1: of a segment, we are talking about this concept of perfectionism.
Speaker 1: So I want to I want to posit this and say,
Speaker 1: Jordan has not been to the show. I said that
Speaker 1: earlier I have, but a lot of even like, this
Speaker 1: conversation is not specifically about the show. This conversation is
Speaker 1: specifically about the ways that the world has responded to
Speaker 1: the show and specific parts of the show. And so
Speaker 1: I'm pretty sure you've already seen the clips show. You've
Speaker 1: seen the clips of of you know, blue dancing and
Speaker 1: the clip of Roomy being on the stage and people
Speaker 1: just going ham and you know, on the videos and
Speaker 1: on the comments talking really poorly about them, And it
Speaker 1: made me stop as I was as I was reflecting
Speaker 1: on the show. It made me stop and think about
Speaker 1: this notion of how the world participates in the com
Speaker 1: like how the world feeds into the idea that blackness
Speaker 1: has to equal perfectionism, and the different ways that we
Speaker 1: talk about black freedom per se, Like, I feel like
Speaker 1: that word is going to be very salient in this conversation.
Speaker 1: And so this notion of like black excellence and how
Speaker 1: daunting it can be specifically on our bodies and on
Speaker 1: our mental like even hearing people talk about Beyonce not
Speaker 1: dancing as much as she used to on the tour.
Speaker 1: This notion of like why it feels like even when
Speaker 1: our children or black people like do the best or
Speaker 1: or do something really really cool, there's always someone that's like, oh,
Speaker 1: you can one up that more, you can do that better,
Speaker 1: and so it just you know, I just want I
Speaker 1: would love to like engage that conversation around perfectionism and
Speaker 1: how you know, Black excellence has pressed its perfectionist thumb
Speaker 1: up against your head, So what are some ways that
Speaker 1: you feel, like, you know, perfectionism has shown up for
Speaker 1: you and like how do you really deal with that?
Speaker 2: Damn damn?
Speaker 3: Well, all right, it's yeah, you know what we do here.
Speaker 3: I like who I think they're Like there's levels to
Speaker 3: this ship, you know. Like yeah, when I'm like, wh
Speaker 3: I'm thinking of like blue, like blue and roomy, right,
Speaker 3: and like like when I'm thinking about them in the
Speaker 3: terms of how people are reacting to them in the
Speaker 3: show and the da of like black excellence and perfectionism,
Speaker 3: when I think of like first child syndrome, like I'm
Speaker 3: really curious about right, like right, like blue blue for
Speaker 3: so long, like.
Speaker 2: Was Destiny's child?
Speaker 3: Right, Like everyone's like like people people anything about It's
Speaker 3: like it's kind of like strange and manning, right, like
Speaker 3: people put a lot of pressure and emphasis on Blue
Speaker 3: like being the child and still do right And and
Speaker 3: you really see in Renaissance that I watched the film
Speaker 3: when it was in theaters, right, how much Being has
Speaker 3: talked about that as well too, like she hasn't had
Speaker 3: a struggle like how I have.
Speaker 2: And I don't want her to.
Speaker 3: R and how she was disappointed when someone had let
Speaker 3: Blue see the comments about her after the first show
Speaker 3: of her choreography, and and yeah that also made her
Speaker 3: like work hard and stuff. But like but you know,
Speaker 3: like oftentimes, right, like the first child takes a brunt
Speaker 3: of the ship from the parents and that and the
Speaker 3: subsequent children get to be more free in some ways,
Speaker 3: you know, And so I think that's that's like that
Speaker 3: that's like one layer. I think, like, you know, innocence
Speaker 3: looks like looks different for for them, right, like like
Speaker 3: like like seeing me looks so innocent does and does
Speaker 3: write but Blue also like but Blue also always came
Speaker 3: out like like I always think of what it was
Speaker 3: like I want to say it was like.
Speaker 2: I don't know, is it the Grammys or something, but
Speaker 2: it is this her parents.
Speaker 3: She's like she puts the hands on them right right,
Speaker 3: Like Blue has also always been manager, always been manager,
Speaker 3: has always been you know, and you know, and I
Speaker 3: also so I also wanted to write like like I
Speaker 3: I forget how how her prendances with Blue was. I
Speaker 3: remember her talking about their her pregnancy with me and sir,
Speaker 3: how challenging was for her right and how and how
Speaker 3: like she as a backmen she was actually was endangered
Speaker 3: still like with the with like lack of proper like
Speaker 3: you know, healthcare and so you know. So I also
Speaker 3: wonder like like like did that impact to her of
Speaker 3: like these kids troubled to even get here, so like
Speaker 3: so I like, like I want them to also feel
Speaker 3: that they'essent right, we see a lot of roomy but
Speaker 3: not a lot of sir, like, like where's certain all this?
Speaker 3: I think I also have questions too, you know, and like
Speaker 3: and I'm not trying to spend as much time talking
Speaker 3: about like people's kids.
Speaker 2: I also was wading to tell people of kids like
Speaker 2: this as well too.
Speaker 3: But I think if we were like like I like,
Speaker 3: I see them as kids, and I think like the
Speaker 3: idea of excellence and perfectionism. People so like people are
Speaker 3: like Blue was so amazing, Blue is so dope, but
Speaker 3: it was also twelve years old. And like, as much
Speaker 3: as I think Blue was amazing, yeah, as much as
Speaker 3: I'm stopped that lose hitting the choreography, much as I'm
Speaker 3: like Blue, like you know, like and one's like in
Speaker 3: two more years, she'll be at her mom's level.
Speaker 2: In two more years, should be fourteen. I do not
Speaker 2: want her to be I want it.
Speaker 1: She shouldn't be.
Speaker 2: She wants too good for her.
Speaker 3: I'm happy for her, like I want Blue to also
Speaker 3: just to be a kid, Like I want Blue to
Speaker 3: like not feel the pressure to do that either, and
Speaker 3: like right on their upholding the idea of like a
Speaker 3: black child should be like right, blush out of the
Speaker 3: most arguably powerful person in the world culturally is more
Speaker 3: held to the standard of like having to be perfectionism.
Speaker 2: Yep, yep, yep, yep.
Speaker 1: You know so I think about it, right, So you know,
Speaker 1: we if you've listened to our show or if you've
Speaker 1: been following our show, we did a conversation. I forget
Speaker 1: what episode it was, but we talked about Cowboy Carter
Speaker 1: and one of the things we did is we did
Speaker 1: kind of a breakdown of each of the songs, and
Speaker 1: even with sixteen carriages, right as as I listened to
Speaker 1: sixteen characters, like, there's a part of me that's like,
Speaker 1: I hear what Beyonce is sang in that song, and
Speaker 1: I feel it so much, And I pray that her
Speaker 1: kids never have to feel that right like I never.
Speaker 1: I pray, I actually pray for all black kids to
Speaker 1: never have to feel that song per se right, to
Speaker 1: feel like they had to give up so much of
Speaker 1: their youngness and their youth, you know, to be to
Speaker 1: work right like Beyonce is sanging that song right Like,
Speaker 1: I'm basically on the road helping my family. I'm helping
Speaker 1: my family get out you know, I'm gonna say get
Speaker 1: out of poverty. Because we know that Beyonce didn't come
Speaker 1: from poverty. But we also know that Beyonce's parents, you know,
Speaker 1: her mother gave up persal on, her father gave up
Speaker 1: his job. I think he was an insurance broker something
Speaker 1: like that. And literally they basically said, we're gonna pour
Speaker 1: all of our energy into Beyonce. And yes, they were
Speaker 1: in a privileged place, but the reality of the matter
Speaker 1: was like in order for Beyonce felt like there was
Speaker 1: this thing on her at the age of like fourteen
Speaker 1: fifteen years old that she had to be perfect and
Speaker 1: be good at it all so that way she could
Speaker 1: help her parents and lift her her family up. That
Speaker 1: pressure is something that we all feel. And so I
Speaker 1: that's the reason why I positive this right as a
Speaker 1: talking point for us our show, because I see how
Speaker 1: we do that to black kids. I see how we
Speaker 1: do that to black youth specifically and making them feel
Speaker 1: like and again, and it's not just a black issue, right,
Speaker 1: I'm just you know, obviously this is a black ass show,
Speaker 1: so we're going to talk about it from the black person.
Speaker 1: But I think marginalized kids in general we have this
Speaker 1: onus of feeling like we have to always excel in
Speaker 1: every single thing that we do because the white eye,
Speaker 1: like the white people are looking at us, the white
Speaker 1: people are going to critique us if we show up
Speaker 1: half as good to it. And so that's you know,
Speaker 1: that's just like I said, I think there's two things
Speaker 1: that are here. The expectation that we put on black creators, children, artists,
Speaker 1: all those things because we know that we're better than
Speaker 1: the oppressor. And knowing that the oppressor will never be
Speaker 1: able to touch us with a ten football. And then
Speaker 1: we have this thing of how they constantly how youth
Speaker 1: black youth are constantly being told that nothing they do
Speaker 1: will ever be good enough, so you have to work
Speaker 1: twice as hard just to get as far. Even at
Speaker 1: my big age of forty, I still feel that, right like,
Speaker 1: even looking at our podcast numbers pressure that means you
Speaker 1: have talked about off air of often sure that are
Speaker 1: you know, we've got to get the awards and we
Speaker 1: got to get our numbers up it. We got to
Speaker 1: do this. And I know that that's not coming from
Speaker 1: I want to make that very clear in case you
Speaker 1: know our team is listening, right, I want to make
Speaker 1: it very clear that this is not coming from iHeart
Speaker 1: per se. But there is still this idea of when
Speaker 1: we came into this, right like, if your show is
Speaker 1: not good enough, it can be canceled. And it didn't
Speaker 1: come from our team. It just comes from the world
Speaker 1: that we live in as black people and black people
Speaker 1: that if your show is not quote unquote the best
Speaker 1: show ever, or it's not the most the most awarded show,
Speaker 1: it's not a good show, you know, And so I
Speaker 1: just you know, I hate that we're here. I hate
Speaker 1: that we're here. I hate that the world keeps projecting
Speaker 1: their insecurities onto a seven year old than an eight
Speaker 1: year old and a twelve year old child, you know.
Speaker 1: And I want to be clear too, the reason why
Speaker 1: we don't see Sir, I want to make that also
Speaker 1: very clear. It's no shade. The reason why we don't
Speaker 1: see Sir is because Sir doesn't like the attention. And
Speaker 1: I think that's the reason why we don't see him.
Speaker 1: It is because for whatever reason, we don't know what
Speaker 1: the full reason is. But Beyonce has said, Sir is
Speaker 1: not roomy or Blue. Sir does not like the attention,
Speaker 1: and they honor that, and I love for that.
Speaker 3: Which I think is I mean, like like lately greate parenting.
Speaker 3: Like again, if you watch Renaissance, right like Blue was
Speaker 3: asking to be on stage and Beyonce was like no,
Speaker 3: like I don't want you to be on stage. And
Speaker 3: then and then Blue was like, let's negotiate, girl, I
Speaker 3: want to be on stage, and Beyonce said like if
Speaker 3: you want to do this, and you can do this,
Speaker 3: and like then like okay, girl, do it, and like
Speaker 3: see what happens right and like and the and then
Speaker 3: obviously when people coming from Blue Beyonce was like, I
Speaker 3: hate that you saw this and I always sing but
Speaker 3: Blue Blue was like, Noga, I got this and it
Speaker 3: has come out and slayed the game every single time,
Speaker 3: which I think is like super super dope. But I think,
Speaker 3: you know, like like I appreciate the parenting that they're
Speaker 3: giving of saying but because like it'd be so easy
Speaker 3: as famous parents to then try and profit off their
Speaker 3: kids as well, which I which I love, because they're
Speaker 3: saying like like.
Speaker 2: We don't need a profit off of our kids.
Speaker 3: Like they're like we profitable already, we don't need to
Speaker 3: make more off of our kids, and we refuse to
Speaker 3: make them. We've refused to make them perform and let's
Speaker 3: be honest, perform for the white gays like like they
Speaker 3: just don't just make make make a book right like
Speaker 3: like she like like she she she she even said
Speaker 3: she went said in her song, Boss, my great grandchildren
Speaker 3: already rich. That's a lot of it was a lot
Speaker 3: of children on your Forbes list, like she like she
Speaker 3: is like I taken care of my my my family,
Speaker 3: fat family for generations. Now they need to do what
Speaker 3: they want to do and not what they have to do,
Speaker 3: which I think is have to really really really really politial,
Speaker 3: you know, which does.
Speaker 2: Like leading to another question as well.
Speaker 3: But but also why we walk back to your point
Speaker 3: about right, right, like like us as blot folks having
Speaker 3: if like we have to meet our numbers, right, Like
Speaker 3: we know that the country we live and exists in
Speaker 3: runs off of meeting your metrics. It runs off of metrics,
Speaker 3: it runs off of the impact, runs off evaluation, it
Speaker 3: runs off of us mediur numbers, and so like, yeah,
Speaker 3: it's a very real thing that we weekly are like, hey, what.
Speaker 2: Can we do to people, to people to be people
Speaker 2: to be more engaged with us?
Speaker 3: Right, even though our quality of engagement is so good,
Speaker 3: so many we have like amazing people who listen to
Speaker 3: our show, who who ride with us, who walk with us.
Speaker 2: On our social media, who leave us reviews.
Speaker 3: Right, but like but but but when like when when
Speaker 3: when when we get that one bad review or bad comment,
Speaker 3: or we get reading four stars and that five stars,
Speaker 3: or we're saying that we're not getting we're not getting
Speaker 3: hundreds of thousands of downloads, right like our minds like well,
Speaker 3: America runs off metrics and we're in the metrics, which
Speaker 3: is which is like so frustrating because then right then
Speaker 3: and then puts us in space where like we're like
Speaker 3: we've like we can't create because we want to do
Speaker 3: it for joy. We got to create, like to do
Speaker 3: it for survival work. It becomes work, It becomes work.
Speaker 3: And so I think the other question I'm thinking a
Speaker 3: lot about is like like what one for the kids?
Speaker 3: But also usually for black folks, right, like was it?
Speaker 3: But I think especially for it for these like their children,
Speaker 3: Like what what does it mean for black children to
Speaker 3: be free to do things because they want to do
Speaker 3: it now because they have to do it?
Speaker 2: But black children don't feel like kids? What does that
Speaker 2: look like?
Speaker 1: You mean? And so I said, like I had posted
Speaker 1: this on social I posted this on social like literally
Speaker 1: the the like A few hours after I got home
Speaker 1: and I started seeing all the comments about Roomy, you know,
Speaker 1: on on social media. I said to myself, I said,
Speaker 1: you know, I watch Blue and I watch Roomy, and
Speaker 1: I watch a lot of other like you know, I
Speaker 1: have a a friend of my Angelina Spicer, who is
Speaker 1: a comedian and she has a daughter, and I have
Speaker 1: quite a few friends who are like in the industry,
Speaker 1: My friend Jessica, right, my friend just you know, yeah,
Speaker 1: you know Jessica, just Marie Gercie, who's the friends on
Speaker 1: our show. She has a daughter, and I watch their kids.
Speaker 1: And even though Jessica's kid is not black, she's she's Latin. Next,
Speaker 1: I still recognize that there's the oppression that is over
Speaker 1: their heads. Right, there's still this this this thing of
Speaker 1: you're you're you're a minoritized child, living, like you said,
Speaker 1: in a world that is not built for you and
Speaker 1: based off of metrics and capitalism and all these other things.
Speaker 1: And I just, you know, I think about, you know,
Speaker 1: what does it mean to be free? For them? Is
Speaker 1: the idea that they can stand on a stage and
Speaker 1: jump up for joy and wave at people and have
Speaker 1: people wave back to them, and have signs that say
Speaker 1: we love you for them simply just existing right like
Speaker 1: they don't have to they don't and and so you know,
Speaker 1: and I'm trying not to get too deep into the whole,
Speaker 1: like fake woke, and I know what I'm talking about,
Speaker 1: and and you know, my educational back although I do
Speaker 1: have a degree to back up, I think about the
Speaker 1: the gamut of like systematic oppression and racism, and the
Speaker 1: ways that black people only ever see markets, not black people,
Speaker 1: white people, specifically white systems. I want to say more largely,
Speaker 1: white systems only see us when we're entertaining, only value
Speaker 1: us when we're doing something to help them feel better
Speaker 1: about what they're not doing.
Speaker 2: Right.
Speaker 1: We love what you had to say, doctor Higgins, because
Speaker 1: you came in and said the hard thing. But everyone's
Speaker 1: not thinking about what my life is like when I
Speaker 1: walk out that door and people are making it hell
Speaker 1: for me because I said and did what needed to
Speaker 1: be done around that hard thing. Right. So I think
Speaker 1: about that a lot, Like what does freedom look like?
Speaker 1: Not feeling like they have to constantly be on right?
Speaker 1: So like I think it's like I love the idea
Speaker 1: that Sir is not in the limelight. Like I love
Speaker 1: that when people are like, well, where's sir. We don't
Speaker 1: need to see sir. Sir as a child at home?
Speaker 2: He is, he's.
Speaker 1: Childcare provider, Like he's at home. Let him be at home.
Speaker 1: It's the same thing when my friend Jessica says, I
Speaker 1: don't want my daughter being on social media. Good No,
Speaker 1: I same thing about me. I don't want my nephew,
Speaker 1: like I understand, like I under like I I would
Speaker 1: never purport myself to feel like I have a massive
Speaker 1: brand and that I'm this huge or whatever. But I
Speaker 1: love the idea that no one really knows who my
Speaker 1: nephew is, like you know them because you pictures of
Speaker 1: my close friends. But I don't want I don't want
Speaker 1: my nephew involved with a lot of the stuff I'm
Speaker 1: doing because I want my nephew to be a seven
Speaker 1: year old kid. I want him coming over to Uncle
Speaker 1: Johnny's house and not feeling like he has to duck
Speaker 1: and dodge and mind everything that he's doing, and that
Speaker 1: he can come over here, play with his toys, play
Speaker 1: with you know, play what's that video game that everybody plays?
Speaker 1: Uh no that?
Speaker 2: But also oh okay.
Speaker 1: Come up here and play switch and have a good time.
Speaker 1: Like I just I want our kids to not have
Speaker 1: to feel like we feel like I will be transparent
Speaker 1: and saying like I don't know how to rest because
Speaker 1: I've never been able to. I don't know how. And
Speaker 1: I'm sure you feel this too, like we me and you,
Speaker 1: like even right now trying to get this podcast done,
Speaker 1: we are we are always doing something because what does
Speaker 1: the world tell us if you're not working, if you're
Speaker 1: not overly stressed, if you're not over rod blocks, if
Speaker 1: you're not that too. I'm sure if you're not you're
Speaker 1: not doing something. I mean, and I'm sure you hurt
Speaker 1: this as a black kid too. If you're not doing something,
Speaker 1: you're not productive, right, get up and do something. Why
Speaker 1: are you sitting down? Why are you watching TV? Go
Speaker 1: do something productive? And it's like, nigga, I'm eight, What like,
Speaker 1: go outside and mow the lawn?
Speaker 4: Why?
Speaker 1: Like I want, like, I literally want that from my nephew. Great,
Speaker 1: and when we go to Disneyland, get what you want,
Speaker 1: I'll give you listen to one hundred dollars just say
Speaker 1: I don't want my nephew like my nephew. I see
Speaker 1: him almost as if he's my child. I don't want
Speaker 1: my nephew to have to feel the way I felt
Speaker 1: growing up. You know. I want my nephew to enjoy.
Speaker 1: And it almost makes me emotional because it's like it's
Speaker 1: so I just hate that we're at a place where
Speaker 1: we take this shit that we carry with us and
Speaker 1: we it's almost like it's I liken it to the
Speaker 1: idea I know I'm on a soapbox today, but it's
Speaker 1: like I liking it to Like so when people UH
Speaker 1: talk about, oh, well, I had to work hard to
Speaker 1: get my degree, so you should no one helped me
Speaker 1: pay my degree, so no, you should be happy that
Speaker 1: somebody got their degree for free, because why should they
Speaker 1: have to fucking struggle in order for them? Like, it
Speaker 1: just it blows my mind that we take our stress
Speaker 1: and our oppression and we just drop it off on
Speaker 1: these kids and we and we normalize it like this
Speaker 1: is like the way that these people are talking about
Speaker 1: these children. It's not normal. So it just it really
Speaker 1: really makes me upset. I don't know I and like
Speaker 1: I know, I don't know them. I don't know their kids.
Speaker 1: I probably never will, but it just it's it's it's
Speaker 1: really upsetting to me that I think that we we
Speaker 1: are so hard on kids who just want to have
Speaker 1: the Blue just wants to have fun. Let her have fun.
Speaker 1: I didn't get to have fun at fourteen. I was
Speaker 1: working at a fucking Shaky's. At fourteen, I was collecting
Speaker 1: tips because I was trying to help my mom pay bills.
Speaker 1: I didn't get to have fun. So seeing Blue up
Speaker 1: there dancing and having a good time at her age.
Speaker 1: Let her I didn't get that, you know. So that's
Speaker 1: where I'm at.
Speaker 2: Ooh girl, that is.
Speaker 3: I that so much in my spirit, and like I'm thinking,
Speaker 3: I'm thinking like some of different things within that, because
Speaker 3: like like wanting your kids be free, wanting them to
Speaker 3: not have to like be a part of the suppressive
Speaker 3: system that keeps them, that keeps them like tethered to
Speaker 3: like tether to obligation of possibility versus joy is so
Speaker 3: so real. It's like I I like, I I think
Speaker 3: like it was what you say about like the like
Speaker 3: rest like never like like whenever I told me what
Speaker 3: I'm enough to, the people were like while like you
Speaker 3: do so much, and I feel like it's not enough
Speaker 3: all the time. I feel like I can't run myself
Speaker 3: to the ground and still be like it's not enough.
Speaker 3: It's not enough, even though it's too much. And and
Speaker 3: and I'm as like, well if I do this work,
Speaker 3: like because I'm from not part of this work, like
Speaker 3: no one, no one else is doing this work right now,
Speaker 3: not that it's only on me or that on the
Speaker 3: end all be all for it, but like I often
Speaker 3: think like I'm i I am the one.
Speaker 2: Driving this right now. And if I'm not the one
Speaker 2: driving this, I don't know who's gonna pick.
Speaker 3: It up, and and and and frankly, the work is
Speaker 3: too important like to me to drop, but it contributes
Speaker 3: to like to my burnout, right Like, I wish I
Speaker 3: could trust that people could pick it up.
Speaker 2: I wish I could trust that.
Speaker 3: People like like like have my back and like so
Speaker 3: like sometimes they do sometimes that, but leave it and
Speaker 3: sometimes I don't, and so right like like, the conditions
Speaker 3: are not created for us to be able to rest
Speaker 3: in the first place. And so when someone someone's and
Speaker 3: and so when when someone's like when someone's got to
Speaker 3: ask me, like, oh, how do you find rest?
Speaker 2: How do you find relaxation?
Speaker 3: Girl? Find me a condition to do it, find me
Speaker 3: a place to do, like like you're asking you like
Speaker 3: you're at hello.
Speaker 2: You address the symptom and not the cause.
Speaker 3: I address the cause of that symptom, girl, And I can,
Speaker 3: like and I can and I can work on it,
Speaker 3: you know, And I think right like that begins at
Speaker 3: your childhood. That begins that like when you have kids
Speaker 3: and they have they have challenges, you address the stem
Speaker 3: the challenge, not the cause of the challenge you don't
Speaker 3: address like what actually the issue it's it stems like
Speaker 3: stems from for them, you know. I sometimes like I
Speaker 3: struggle with like like you know, like I I struggle
Speaker 3: a lot sometimes with with like kids of celebrities, because
Speaker 3: part of me sometimes is like, okay, like these are
Speaker 3: you know, like right, like like's it's it's it's a
Speaker 3: it's a it's a double double it's short because part
Speaker 3: of me is like I wish.
Speaker 2: Right, like like like like I'm like roomy.
Speaker 3: Sirt and blue, like I wish they could just be
Speaker 3: kids and partimes. And and sometimes I'm like okay, but
Speaker 3: they also go on like shoving vacations, right like, they
Speaker 3: also like they also do get to be kids, like
Speaker 3: like like when their parents are working, they're there for work,
Speaker 3: but like they also do get to be kids in
Speaker 3: other ways that like many people do not get to
Speaker 3: be kids, right right, right, And and that said, they
Speaker 3: all like they're also kids in a public spotlight, right
Speaker 3: And so the pressure they have for the work from
Speaker 3: the from the world around them is also just like
Speaker 3: wild and intense, right, And I think it's like definitely microcosmic,
Speaker 3: particularly around there the the as we play like we
Speaker 3: place on young black women. I also feel and I've
Speaker 3: been thinking about this a lot too, like a lot
Speaker 3: of people are commenting on Blues apparents and people have
Speaker 3: always commented on to parents all the way, and like
Speaker 3: and I will she was, I'm not shy away right
Speaker 3: like I've been mo those people like I've been want
Speaker 3: one more people who like like I hope she was
Speaker 3: like this not like this right and and and as adult,
Speaker 3: I'm like, oh my god, like why like like I'm
Speaker 3: not given have a chance to just like be a
Speaker 3: free child, like right, like like I'm like one, I'm
Speaker 3: basing her worth of how she might look, which is
Speaker 3: already probacas in itself, right and then like and I'm
Speaker 3: saying she looks this other way she made not look
Speaker 3: as good or something I was thinking about.
Speaker 2: I was listening to.
Speaker 3: Uh uh Sequoia Holmes, who was on but who runs
Speaker 3: Black People Pair More.
Speaker 2: She's a show on her sexem as well too.
Speaker 3: I think it's like the the the deadly dirty she
Speaker 3: was talking about, like she she was saying like she
Speaker 3: was never she wasn't called beautiful a lot growing up,
Speaker 3: and so it's not part of her daddy right, and
Speaker 3: it's nothing. She doesn't think she's not beautiful, and and
Speaker 3: like like and she is right, but like but but
Speaker 3: she made a point of saying like, it's not my
Speaker 3: daddy's not tied to like my beauty. And so she
Speaker 3: was like, I want young girls to grow not feeling
Speaker 3: like they have they have to be beautiful to be
Speaker 3: worth something. And I was like, I was like, oh,
Speaker 3: like what an interesting moment of like framing for me
Speaker 3: of like, oh, like I'm like I always come out,
Speaker 3: I always comment on like I'm come on, I'm coming
Speaker 3: on people's appearances of like oh, like you look thinner
Speaker 3: a ball, like like I'm always post like you're so studying,
Speaker 3: are right, And part of me wants to do that
Speaker 3: partment is like, oh my gosh. I also don't want
Speaker 3: reinforce the idea that like they're like looking good or
Speaker 3: being beautiful for them in a way exactly exactly right.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 3: I feel like in the case of Blue, everyone's like
Speaker 3: she looks so much like her mom, she looks so great,
Speaker 3: and it's like you're coming like you're comparing and beyond
Speaker 3: a child to Beyonce like that like that like that
Speaker 3: is that is how she kind of wild right like
Speaker 3: like and like, no kid wants to compare to the parents.
Speaker 3: No kid wants to be in their parents shadow because
Speaker 3: they want to be their own person. And so I
Speaker 3: do have a question for us of like, are we
Speaker 3: actually are aren't we actually making it work for Blue
Speaker 3: by putting on this on her right, you know, or
Speaker 3: like like or by saying like, oh, like she nailed
Speaker 3: her mom's choreography from uh what was was?
Speaker 2: Yeah?
Speaker 3: Yeah, she like she she buy that choreography from from
Speaker 3: from she said, much like her mom. Give her two years,
Speaker 3: she'll be like her mom. No, like like like, let
Speaker 3: Blue be blue. Her name is not Blue Beyonce. Let
Speaker 3: her be blue. Let her let her be herself, you know.
Speaker 1: And and I want to not to cut you off,
Speaker 1: but to your point, I think that's like that's the
Speaker 1: nuclear the nucleus of of what we're talking about, right,
Speaker 1: the the giving kids, specifically black children, the space to
Speaker 1: be themselves. Like I really want us to get black
Speaker 1: people in general, not just children but everybody black, right,
Speaker 1: you need to be able to be ourselves but children themselves. Yes,
Speaker 1: let them be they all?
Speaker 3: And you know, and I will say I do like
Speaker 3: you get a question of and he know we do
Speaker 3: anything be and Jairman and say conversations with the kids
Speaker 3: as as are pretty talking about us around blackness, and
Speaker 3: and then I I also think I also think so
Speaker 3: like I think like even though it's beyonce.
Speaker 2: Child, I I I think that's the.
Speaker 3: Level that Beyonce and Jason now, the like no amount
Speaker 3: of protection that they have like socially of being their
Speaker 3: their child will could will keep Blue safe.
Speaker 2: From everything in the world.
Speaker 3: Like like I I absolutely do believe, like I absolutely
Speaker 3: do do believe Stale that like even even if she
Speaker 3: says I'm shah, that does not that meant that may
Speaker 3: not matter to a police officer in the field for
Speaker 3: some way, right, And so I absolutely do absolute which
Speaker 3: is also why like they are security up right there
Speaker 3: when you know they're driven with other people. They only
Speaker 3: people only that they trust around their kids because like
Speaker 3: like they don't want to be in spaces where the
Speaker 3: kids be endagered in any way, which is yeah, yeah,
Speaker 3: so who okay, okay, fam, Well, now that we have
Speaker 3: told Blue ivy Andy haters, we're to go ahead to
Speaker 3: get there and how to kick rocks on the way,
Speaker 3: we gotta take one man, another quick break and past
Speaker 3: the cause, the cause of paying bills, that is, we
Speaker 3: will be back soon with what's on your plate?
Speaker 4: In just a bit, can't you pay my benephone?
Speaker 1: Boom?
Speaker 3: Okay, fam, we are back and say want light and
Speaker 3: fun for what's on your plate? As to big girls
Speaker 3: to go to a lot of events and knowing that
Speaker 3: your events events were having some interesting food choices. And
Speaker 3: I'm here to ask you what's your favorite outdoor stadium,
Speaker 3: what's your favorite outdoor concert venue or stadium snack?
Speaker 2: You know what what you should think have some of
Speaker 2: the best the best snacky booths.
Speaker 1: You Yes, so I don't have a specific location. However,
Speaker 1: one thing about so everyone, I will say this, A
Speaker 1: lot of people give me a lot of like people.
Speaker 1: People always comment on my teeth. People are like, you
Speaker 1: have such pretty teeth.
Speaker 3: Now, I thank you.
Speaker 1: A lot of people don't know is that I also
Speaker 1: have spent a lot of my life with fucked up
Speaker 1: teeth because my teeth are brittle, and so I've had
Speaker 1: to have a lot of work done on my mouth
Speaker 1: because one of the things that I love to eat
Speaker 1: is popcorn, and I think I get that from my mom.
Speaker 1: My mom is a massive popcorn eater, and so am I.
Speaker 1: I love every variation of popcorn you could think of.
Speaker 1: I'm gonna eat it, and so I love going to
Speaker 1: stadiums and if I see they got popcorn, I won't it.
Speaker 1: Especially I will say that Disneyland has the best popcorn.
Speaker 1: They put crack in that popcorn. I don't know what
Speaker 1: they put in that popcorn, but it's good. But a
Speaker 1: good soda popcorn is ever eat it for me. I'm
Speaker 1: a big girl. So I love candy. I you know
Speaker 1: I love candy and drinks. You know I love to
Speaker 1: go to the movie theater and put candy in the popcorn.
Speaker 1: I can't wait to get back from my vacation so
Speaker 1: I can go see centers and I can do that.
Speaker 1: I can mix the chocolates and into popcorns because that's
Speaker 1: my favorite thing to do.
Speaker 2: But yes, yes, no, no.
Speaker 1: I would also say that I love a good so
Speaker 1: I'm a true so when you go to so Far
Speaker 1: and you and go when you get to the level
Speaker 1: wherever level you're sitting, I don't want you to out
Speaker 1: yourself from where you're sitting. But they have a little
Speaker 1: stand with a little cowboy cup drink uh there's like
Speaker 1: a blended mixed drink situation. I love those two, especially
Speaker 1: if it's a good alcoholic one, even though I don't
Speaker 1: really drink. I would have gotten one when I went
Speaker 1: to the show, but I can't have it because of
Speaker 1: the sugar content and it. But that's also my favorite.
Speaker 1: I love a good mixed drink. It's because those things
Speaker 1: are loaded with sugar. And also if I can get
Speaker 1: a good hot dog or good chili dog, I will
Speaker 1: say Dodgers, they have some really good dogs. I will
Speaker 1: give them tip tip the back to the Dodger Stadium.
Speaker 1: They got some good hot dogs and a good coke zero,
Speaker 1: not diet coke. Die coke is nasty. I'd be telling
Speaker 1: the people that die coke is disgusting. Coke zero is
Speaker 1: where it's all right. Question of the day. Are you
Speaker 1: a Are you a soda drinker? I've never seen you
Speaker 1: drink soda?
Speaker 2: Okay, love this question. Yes, Yes, and no.
Speaker 3: I I didn't gules because because I mean one, because
Speaker 3: like there were a lot of diatodas were growing up
Speaker 3: and like my like my parents were diabetic. So they're like,
Speaker 3: we're not going to drink sugar sugar, so and so
Speaker 3: I just never like, like, tell me, tell me if
Speaker 3: die bag parents don't tell me.
Speaker 2: I diaba of parents in the house. No candies, you.
Speaker 3: Know, no no things with sugars, but my grandparents. I
Speaker 3: I do like it depends like and I don't love
Speaker 3: alsodas like I'm I've never been like, I've never been
Speaker 3: like a mountain dew girly. I'm not a spread reality
Speaker 3: like it's not it's just like not my I.
Speaker 2: I don't do who iced tea and iced tya. People
Speaker 2: love the baha blasts. I'm like like, but like I'm
Speaker 2: an I cigaret. I'm a lemonade girly.
Speaker 1: I do you said?
Speaker 2: I sy I know iced tea, iced tea, iced tea.
Speaker 1: I do never get I could never.
Speaker 2: I do appreciate.
Speaker 3: I appreciate a crisp coke zero sometimes I do, I did,
Speaker 3: I did.
Speaker 2: I do love root beer. I love root beer. No.
Speaker 3: I drink a lot of the what they called ollipops,
Speaker 3: the allpop sodas they had. They actually love for soda
Speaker 3: is because because because you know, the lower your content,
Speaker 3: they're they're they're higher part of their their their pre biotics.
Speaker 3: And I let oropotics and I fuck those up. They're
Speaker 3: expensive as hell, but I do love those. I d
Speaker 3: down if I'm at a stadium. You know pet Co
Speaker 3: Parkingsan Diego. There's a lot of a lot of things there,
Speaker 3: but they have there. There's just one place. It's a
Speaker 3: barbecue place that they exist outside of the Citdium that
Speaker 3: I love to go to. But they also have a
Speaker 3: sale in the Citdium and I love to go to them,
Speaker 3: but they're always so fucking packed. I often don't get
Speaker 3: stadium food because the line is just so damn long,
Speaker 3: like minds me too long?
Speaker 2: Minutes to pay twenty dollars for all hot so long?
Speaker 1: What we missed?
Speaker 2: Go ahead?
Speaker 3: Why I pay ten dollars for a human national hot dog?
Speaker 3: That that that that that pencil dick for.
Speaker 2: A hot dog? Why am I this?
Speaker 1: Woh?
Speaker 2: I got so.
Speaker 1: Hot in the straight My god? Yeah, we almost missed
Speaker 1: Beyonce standing in line waiting for.
Speaker 3: I'm saying girl because the way, because the way, I
Speaker 3: was up. Because at restaurants I left for, I left for.
Speaker 3: I left just I was like, I need to get
Speaker 3: I need some drinks. I went to get some iced tea.
Speaker 2: Right.
Speaker 3: It took ten minutes of the iced tea mind you,
Speaker 3: my seat was like no more than thirty feet from
Speaker 3: the concession stand. So and I missed church Girl. The
Speaker 3: one song, the one song that I said that you
Speaker 3: really wanted to see.
Speaker 2: Was because my dumb ass like, let me get some
Speaker 2: nice and the I see machine was broken.
Speaker 3: Then she goes somewhere. Then then then then she can
Speaker 3: find the cup. And I said, I just want to
Speaker 3: hear your church door, right, And it was on her
Speaker 3: birthday show. So I missed her little little birthday.
Speaker 1: I missed the whole thing.
Speaker 3: What many of this like, I think I think I
Speaker 3: saw on on the silver screen, so I was I said, yeah,
Speaker 3: so like you know, I I'm not I think like
Speaker 3: I'm I don't do hot was popping that much either.
Speaker 3: I'm a nachos really, I love me some nachos. I
Speaker 3: wish it was different and better, you know, besides just
Speaker 3: the cheese and the plane around chips. But like it's fine,
Speaker 3: It's just that's it, you know again, like exactly it
Speaker 3: doesn't do. But again, like I didn't do like just
Speaker 3: things I actually eat as a kid. So I'm kind
Speaker 3: of like whatever, now it's adult.
Speaker 2: I'm trying. I'm trying.
Speaker 3: I'm going to like the baseball games more and trying
Speaker 3: to reclaim, reclaim and joy like no, I can love
Speaker 3: my inner child and get this hot today and because
Speaker 3: you can, because you can, because you can, Yes, I
Speaker 3: love that for you.
Speaker 1: I was last question, are you a gelopino girl? Do
Speaker 1: you depend?
Speaker 2: Depends? I do so depends. I don't love them.
Speaker 3: If it's like should cheese not chows, I don't love
Speaker 3: them on that, but I love them on the nacho
Speaker 3: cheese sauce notchos.
Speaker 1: Because I want them in the I want them in
Speaker 1: the cheese. I don't want to see.
Speaker 3: Them because the gelopino like feel right, feels like it's
Speaker 3: part of the sauce versus like yeah.
Speaker 1: But I love me a girl, yes, but no, yeah,
Speaker 1: I love yeah, I will. I will bite into one
Speaker 1: if it's not hot. I I don't mind opinions if
Speaker 1: they're hot. If they're not hot, I'm just you. We
Speaker 1: all know that I'm not a hot girl. Anything too hot,
Speaker 1: I'm not eating it. So spicy is not my ministry.
Speaker 1: But I just wanted to know, just like like I said,
Speaker 1: every time I every time I'm on the mic with you,
Speaker 1: I learned so much about my sister. So I was like,
Speaker 1: I wonder if my sister actually but I always yeah,
Speaker 1: I see, yeah, you do you do. Every time we've
Speaker 1: gone to eat, you've always got nice tea. I can't
Speaker 1: say that. Well. With that being said, now that you
Speaker 1: both have learned, now that everybody has learned a lot
Speaker 1: about both of us, we are going to take one
Speaker 1: more quick break to pay some bills, and when we
Speaker 1: get back, we're going to be back with your favorite segment. Yes,
Speaker 1: ma'am and no, ma'm pammy. All right, y'all, so we are,
Speaker 1: as you all know, we're recording early this week because
Speaker 1: life is going up against both of our heads like
Speaker 1: a mama with a chocolate. But with that being said,
Speaker 1: in this segment, we again we give flowers or we
Speaker 1: take them away, and this week I want to give flowers,
Speaker 1: obviously to the Queen. We've been talking about her all
Speaker 1: episode and anytime I can give Beyonce her I'm going
Speaker 1: to y'all know that about me. But actually I'm not
Speaker 1: going to give Beyonce flowers in the way that you think,
Speaker 1: because again, we could just talk about Beyonce all dan
Speaker 1: about how amazing she is. But I definitely wanted to
Speaker 1: say I wanted to say yes, ma'am. And like I said,
Speaker 1: I don't want to give too much away for those
Speaker 1: of you who are waiting to go to Cowboy Carter,
Speaker 1: but the yes man that I wanted to give her
Speaker 1: was specifically just really about this idea of her, like
Speaker 1: the creativity around her and what I mean by that is.
Speaker 1: And as you, Joha, being a multi hyphenate, you probably
Speaker 1: get it right. When when we sit down and we
Speaker 1: think about, Okay, well we want to do this thing
Speaker 1: and we got to do this, there's all these logistics
Speaker 1: and things that sometimes you have to think about. And
Speaker 1: for me it's like watching Cowboy Carter and being at
Speaker 1: the show. It wasn't just for me like okay, well,
Speaker 1: Beyonce's a great singer and she has this great song
Speaker 1: and she has this great album. Okay, great, But then
Speaker 1: to actually like fully actual lives, like an actual show
Speaker 1: and have to think about every interlude and have to
Speaker 1: think about what the dancers are going to be doing
Speaker 1: in a moment or what you know, in this in
Speaker 1: particular show, there's a lot of props, and so how
Speaker 1: the prop's going to be moving and who's going to
Speaker 1: be holding what props and what's like there's just so
Speaker 1: much that goes into being a creative and and and
Speaker 1: for me it's like, yes, I know that Beyonce has
Speaker 1: you know, grown grown money, money like she has long money,
Speaker 1: and so she probably has people to help her with this.
Speaker 1: But the idea that she sits and she hears a
Speaker 1: song is she can think about it and say this
Speaker 1: is what I see, this is what I want to happen.
Speaker 1: Who can help me make this happen? It takes a
Speaker 1: lot of energy to do that, and so I just
Speaker 1: I literally just want to give her a lot of
Speaker 1: credit for that and just be like wow, like the
Speaker 1: fact that she pour and then also the fact that
Speaker 1: she's pouring into so many other creatives while she's being creative,
Speaker 1: because I've also like, I just found out that a
Speaker 1: friend of my reached out to a friend and said, oh,
Speaker 1: I want to do this, look for the next Kyle
Speaker 1: werk Hardershom'm going to Can you reach out to this
Speaker 1: person to help me? And she said, Oh, that person's
Speaker 1: actually working for Beyonce now and their prices are a
Speaker 1: little bit higher, which again I expect or oh they
Speaker 1: may not have the capacity because they you know, Beyonce
Speaker 1: has them doing this thing, and I'm like, wow, that's
Speaker 1: really cool to know that somebody that I know on
Speaker 1: my day to day is now styling and doing some
Speaker 1: you know, doing alterations for a really big tour. So
Speaker 1: it's just really cool to know that Beyonce is not
Speaker 1: just Beyonce, that Beyonce really is doing it for the culture.
Speaker 2: So period.
Speaker 1: That's just my take on it now. My nomn pam
Speaker 1: very simple. I'm just gonna say fuck so Fi. I
Speaker 1: the fact whoever designed so far can go straight to hell.
Speaker 1: It is the most unfriendly, unaccessible, confusing, gotdy, non inviting
Speaker 1: venue I have ever been to. I just I did
Speaker 1: you see did you see her at so Fi?
Speaker 2: When you were?
Speaker 3: Did?
Speaker 1: I hate it? I? That was my first time at
Speaker 1: the Sofi Stadium and it was terrible.
Speaker 3: I liked it only because so section I think three
Speaker 3: hundred is right at the level in which you and
Speaker 3: when you come up the first walking and so that
Speaker 3: was it was easy. If I sat anywhere else, I
Speaker 3: would be like, where the fuck am I going?
Speaker 1: I was in one Hunter and I was I was
Speaker 1: abusing Rah Straighted and the guy recently, how you build
Speaker 1: it it? Yeah, it's terrible. It's so terrible. So for
Speaker 1: anybody that's going to you know, I know, like I said,
Speaker 1: by the time you all hear this, you are you
Speaker 1: know who else? The NRG Stadium is also not super
Speaker 1: accessible either. It's also very very badly built. But who
Speaker 1: am I? I mean, I'm just a podcaster. So but anyway,
Speaker 1: what are your guest? Ma'm'son no man, pass.
Speaker 2: Find me a well but stadium?
Speaker 3: I have no who the fuck like I can't find
Speaker 3: like I I just wonder like who, like y'all don't
Speaker 3: you don't you'll don't let urban planners build these things?
Speaker 2: So who's building them?
Speaker 3: Even though my room planners the ones who should be
Speaker 3: building it because they're the ones that have the thoughts
Speaker 3: behind urban planning?
Speaker 2: Right, go off?
Speaker 1: Who are we?
Speaker 3: Who were besides just two bitches with mics? I guess y,
Speaker 3: yes man, Pam? Not okay, No, honestly my yes man, Pam.
Speaker 3: As I am running on fumes. Is people saying, girl,
Speaker 3: the terrorists like the way that has become locally our
Speaker 3: thing of like, hey, do you want to go out tonight?
Speaker 2: Girl?
Speaker 1: Girl?
Speaker 3: I can't the tariffs? Hey girl, do you want to?
Speaker 3: So I can't the terrorists? Hey girl, I can't the
Speaker 3: terrorists go the terrorists. I've ruined everything and I live
Speaker 3: and I'm just like the terrorists, the terrorists, terrorists, And
Speaker 3: now no one can define what the tariff is. No
Speaker 3: one knows the tariff comes from. Everyone just says, girl,
Speaker 3: the terrorists. I can't the terarriffs, and I just I
Speaker 3: live sting down every single time. My nomad PAM is no.
Speaker 3: I will give up a file a form of complaint
Speaker 3: with this later. But you know, I'm at this must
Speaker 3: multi day event and I'm.
Speaker 1: Going to file a formal complaint later.
Speaker 2: I understand. I understand security needs. I really do. I
Speaker 2: really do, but I.
Speaker 3: Have I am seeing people being profiled for secure mind
Speaker 3: you from like people color security profile by security of color,
Speaker 3: and I'm like, how can provide your own people? Like
Speaker 3: the love of security is like I understand the need
Speaker 3: for safety and like I really do, but like there
Speaker 3: has to be a better way than what we're doing now.
Speaker 3: It just doesn't feel like I think my point of
Speaker 3: like people I know are being profiled by by your
Speaker 3: place because they like look different or something, but like
Speaker 3: that isnt going to help make it more safe and
Speaker 3: like and also like I was just like actually actually
Speaker 3: actually sorry. Let me also say another thing is there's
Speaker 3: a there's a discussion.
Speaker 2: About belonging in this place, and.
Speaker 3: I'm sorry to round a little bit. I've been talking
Speaker 3: about belonging for the past seven years. Like I'm not
Speaker 3: saying that. I'm like I'm the purveyor of belonging anyway, right,
Speaker 3: Like I have a belonging like like injustice work years
Speaker 3: ago and people are now talking about it like it's
Speaker 3: a novel idea. And now I'm like, belonging is around
Speaker 3: for so long. Why are you just now approaching as
Speaker 3: if people have been shying this work from the heavens since,
Speaker 3: you know, since since the beginning of de I work.
Speaker 3: And you're using belonging and staid of de I And
Speaker 3: that's robmatic because your work of belonging is not actual
Speaker 3: be longing. You're discussing a nosion people like, for example,
Speaker 3: like I lunch to an event and like, like one
Speaker 3: thing I think about, right is like the there's there
Speaker 3: there's there are people who are still mask wearers, right,
Speaker 3: like to wear were mass of comforences and like roughly
Speaker 3: so for their own safety inclusion will say you're welcome
Speaker 3: to wear your mask, but belong But like if you,
Speaker 3: for if you're forcing a lunch for them in the
Speaker 3: middle of this giant ballroom that we have to go
Speaker 3: to for the event, they can't eat because they're wearing
Speaker 3: a mask. Like how they unless they risk their lives
Speaker 3: to their mask offs to eat their food. Blogging would say,
Speaker 3: let's make it so you can go eat somewhere outside
Speaker 3: where you feel safer before our program begins. So we like,
Speaker 3: so we so we can, so we can do so
Speaker 3: we can do our program together afterwards. Right, Like that's
Speaker 3: what belogging would be. And so I'm like, y'all are y'allonging?
Speaker 3: Knowing belonging is joputting in practice, right Like inclusion is
Speaker 3: saying white folks about folks can be in the same place. Right,
Speaker 3: but we're but but we'll only we'll only play white music.
Speaker 3: Belonging is gonna be you all, all all folks can
Speaker 3: be in one place and they all they all get
Speaker 3: a chance to DJ, they all get a chance to
Speaker 3: have to have the oscar and we're all we're all
Speaker 3: discing to it. We're all trying all the foods that
Speaker 3: we have, Like y'all don't know what belonging is so
Speaker 3: stop saying it, Like it's just so frustrating to be
Speaker 3: in spaces. The conversations that one like are not pickable
Speaker 3: to actual life today and they don't actually fit what
Speaker 3: they're saying.
Speaker 2: It fits like I want belonging for all the people, but.
Speaker 3: It won't happen if we keep acting like what this
Speaker 3: is is doing at and like it just it.
Speaker 2: Just makes me.
Speaker 3: It makes me so very upset because there are several
Speaker 3: things like us and as someone who loves design programs,
Speaker 3: I'm seeing the pain points and like this could have
Speaker 3: been so different, but you decide to do this because
Speaker 3: because like you decided the majority is more important than
Speaker 3: like these people here by the day right now, the
Speaker 3: people the right, like the the the minority of folks
Speaker 3: like are the ones that will never come back and
Speaker 3: the end, And you'll keep building for majority until you
Speaker 3: only you have you have?
Speaker 2: Then do you keep building the majority until you.
Speaker 1: Have totally isolated?
Speaker 3: Yeah?
Speaker 2: And you have no.
Speaker 1: Yep that Yeah. I could go on for hours. I
Speaker 1: just I think a lot of people I'm gonna and
Speaker 1: I'm gonna keep saying it. I've been saying it. Niggas
Speaker 1: don't read, and I just want to make it clear
Speaker 1: that niggas can be anybody right, and niggas don't just
Speaker 1: have to be black people. Niggas just don't read. And
Speaker 1: it's frustrating to me because it's like I've been saying
Speaker 1: We've all been saying this in our work since the
Speaker 1: inception of time, right include us, and now people are belonging, belonging, belonging,
Speaker 1: and it's like, no, you just don't. It's the same
Speaker 1: reason why people don't like saying black right, because they
Speaker 1: know that there's a responsibility that comes to saying black.
Speaker 1: And so when you start talking about de I, it
Speaker 1: means you actually have to do something. And so what
Speaker 1: do we do. We let's lean on belonging to make
Speaker 1: it easier for us to do this work. It's just
Speaker 1: all of it is. And I'm gonna say this. I know,
Speaker 1: I'm I know it's gonna be late by the time
Speaker 1: this comes out. But while everyone was going up about
Speaker 1: the met Gala, I wasn't because it's performative. Everything around
Speaker 1: the met Gala this season, in terms of the theme,
Speaker 1: was performative. No, I will not be explaining anymore. Google it,
Speaker 1: do your own research, figure it out, or pay me
Speaker 1: for us. To engage that conversation. But everything related to
Speaker 1: the met gala was performative and I didn't see it. Yes,
Speaker 1: there were some cute looks. Jenelle mone was the best stressed,
Speaker 1: but I just I'm just not here for it. So anyway,
Speaker 1: with that being said, we have to go. Please send
Speaker 1: us your thoughts, feedback and email to Blackfatfempod at gmail
Speaker 1: dot com. You can also send us your thoughts via
Speaker 1: social media by interacting with our post on Instagram and
Speaker 1: the Blue of the Skies. We're over there, you know,
Speaker 1: say hello, drop in and drop us Alid Queen Joho.
Speaker 1: Where can the dolls find you this week? Outside of Baltimore.
Speaker 3: My Cowboys, cowgirls and cal Days and cal Gays, you
Speaker 3: can find me Johodanel's across all social website Jordan Daales
Speaker 3: dot com.
Speaker 2: If not there, you will find.
Speaker 3: Me Indpper down in the litas fringe as I'm as
Speaker 3: I'm yeing my last hall even post cowboy Carter hoping
Speaker 3: not my last hall, yes he he my last hall
Speaker 3: of the week. I at that point book book WHOA.
Speaker 2: Very excited for it.
Speaker 3: And just you know, living life to its fullest as
Speaker 3: best as I can.
Speaker 2: And that's wild world.
Speaker 1: I hope you have the most amazing time at the Rodeo.
Speaker 1: I will tell you, like I've been telling everybody, this
Speaker 1: is for everybody. This is not just a sofi thing.
Speaker 1: Get to the arena early as early as you can.
Speaker 1: That merch line. We waited in the merch line for
Speaker 1: an hour and a half. They also have a very
Speaker 1: long line for tasting Sir Davis. So if you haven't
Speaker 1: tasted Sir Davis, go, they are giving it away. They
Speaker 1: have a little mocktail like in mocktail, but they have
Speaker 1: a little cocktail situation too, like a tasting cocktail you
Speaker 1: can get with your shot of Sir Davis. And they
Speaker 1: also have the sacred booths out there where they're giving
Speaker 1: away stuff to I didn't get you know what, Joe,
Speaker 1: can you do that? Do a favor for me? If
Speaker 1: you go, Can you get me one of the little
Speaker 1: sacred Rodeo keychains?
Speaker 2: Yes, I'm gonna eat that. Got ya?
Speaker 1: And Chris, I know, I know Chris, you're gonna listen
Speaker 1: to this.
Speaker 2: Chris.
Speaker 1: Yes, I still have your jersey. I will give it
Speaker 1: to you when I when I'm out in La. But anyway,
Speaker 1: all that to be said, Yes, please make sure, if
Speaker 1: you're going get there early. As for me and mine,
Speaker 1: you will find me at home. Well, actually no, so
Speaker 1: we're recording early because I'm getting ready to go on
Speaker 1: a trip. So you can find me rest for a
Speaker 1: week and a half, much needed rest that I need.
Speaker 1: And other than that, I'm telling everybody go to w
Speaker 1: W dot dotor johnpad dot com. I have eleven more
Speaker 1: dates left in my book tour. It's insane to me
Speaker 1: that I said that. The fact that I've probably almost
Speaker 1: did twenty is crazy. But anyway, all that to be
Speaker 1: said of eleven more dates, So if you want to
Speaker 1: catch me on tour, I will. There are some dates
Speaker 1: I have in California. There are a few more dates
Speaker 1: that I have in Chicago, a few dates that I
Speaker 1: will be a few I'm trying to think of where
Speaker 1: else I'm not going. I'll be in New Orleans. I
Speaker 1: will be in Wichitah. I will also be in Columbus, Ohio.
Speaker 1: So I'm in Dallas, Texas. I'm in Dallas too, So
Speaker 1: if you want to see me, there's a chance for
Speaker 1: you to catch me. But other than that, buy my book,
Speaker 1: keep running it up. I love to see it. And yeah,
Speaker 1: that's pretty much it for me and for mine. So
Speaker 1: with that being said, we love you, We thank you
Speaker 1: for listening. We want to thank our producers Beiwang for
Speaker 1: handling all the logistics with the show, and everyone over
Speaker 1: at iHeartMedia who continues to keep the show up and running. Yes,
Speaker 1: we are in our fourth officially fourth season of the
Speaker 1: show and so it is so grateful to be still
Speaker 1: on the air and being able to bring this show
Speaker 1: to you all. We also want to shout out our
Speaker 1: wonderful editor Chris Rogers, because without him, y'all would have
Speaker 1: no audio and they do a lot of really cool
Speaker 1: hope stuff, So we're very grateful for what they do
Speaker 1: for us with the show and also what they do
Speaker 1: for the tubes of you. We love the comments down
Speaker 1: over at the youtubes. And with that being said, this
Speaker 1: has been another show. Stay black, Fat, femine, fabulous, and
Speaker 1: remember what Jojo.
Speaker 3: We may not be your cup of tiggirl, but get
Speaker 3: us her Davis. You want me anyway, It's okay you.
Speaker 1: Probably, but also be cautious because it's a sipping It's
Speaker 1: a sipping liquor. It's not a drinking liquor. They are
Speaker 1: two different things. I only knew because I was raised
Speaker 1: around alcoholic But y'all have a great one. Love y'all,
Speaker 1: see you next time. Buy