Speaker 1: Episode two eight two Regaining motivation when you don't feel
Speaker 1: like caring about money. Welcome to the Frugal Friends podcast,
Speaker 1: where you'll learn to save money, embrace simplicity, rights, and
Speaker 1: liver with your life. Here your host Jen and Jill.
Speaker 1: Mm hmmmmmm. Welcome to the Frugal Friends podcast. My name
Speaker 1: is Jen, my name is Jill, and today we are
Speaker 1: talking about motivation, that elusive sought after word and feeling,
Speaker 1: and sometimes you just don't feel motivated. A lot of
Speaker 1: the times you don't feel motivated, and that's normal, that's
Speaker 1: absolutely normal. Let's not work against our psychology, let's work
Speaker 1: with it and figure out how do we get motivated?
Speaker 1: How do we just keep going? And that's really what
Speaker 1: today's episodes about. How do we just keep going? How
Speaker 1: just go? Just keep going? So we're going to talk
Speaker 1: about that, but first a word from our sponsor, caring Less.
Speaker 1: Caring Less actually found the motivation to sponsor us when
Speaker 1: we feel like we should care more. It's actually important
Speaker 1: to remember that there's always room to care less. Gen
Speaker 1: reminded me of this recently, and you know what, remembering
Speaker 1: both ends of that spectrum can show us we've truly
Speaker 1: struck the balance. Caring less the only alternative to not
Speaker 1: being able to care anymore. But if you do find
Speaker 1: yourself caring more specifically about money goals, debt payoffs, and
Speaker 1: just caring a little bit more about gaining some motivation,
Speaker 1: you should check out our new Debt Free Stories video
Speaker 1: series on YouTube. Us into any of us talk about
Speaker 1: these debt free stories. We can't announce it without singing
Speaker 1: it because we're so excited. We've got all the goody goodness.
Speaker 1: You need to care less about all the other distractions
Speaker 1: on social media so that you can care more about
Speaker 1: getting motivation from other people, getting excited about other people's
Speaker 1: debt payoff stories. Hearing some fellow Frugal Friends listeners, and
Speaker 1: it's all over on Frugal Friends podcast YouTube channel. Look
Speaker 1: it up on YouTube, hit the subscribe button. Go ahead
Speaker 1: and hit that notification button so you can know in
Speaker 1: the next video drops. Because every there, there's no two
Speaker 1: videos alike. It's like snowflakes up in here. Every video
Speaker 1: is different, every story is different because all of you
Speaker 1: are different, and all of it, though, contains so much
Speaker 1: fun and inspiration and motivation. If you are kind of
Speaker 1: in that slump right now, It's okay to be in
Speaker 1: that slump. We're here for you Frugal Friends podcast, step
Speaker 1: free stories, so you can have that little spark of
Speaker 1: external motivation when you are just not feeling it. These
Speaker 1: are there for you and some really good practical tips.
Speaker 1: So search Frugal Friends on YouTube, subscribe, turn on notifications.
Speaker 1: We gotta coming at you all February into March. We've
Speaker 1: had them all January. So binge the backlog and come
Speaker 1: back for more. Yes, that backlog, okay, So I mean
Speaker 1: one of the greatest ways to regain motivation is to
Speaker 1: binge the backlog of Frugal Friends podcast episodes and debt
Speaker 1: free stories. So that's number one. So that's the first tip,
Speaker 1: and if you need some episodes to do that with
Speaker 1: episode one dred how to maintain a hundred percent effort
Speaker 1: on your financial journey. Spoiler, there is no it's just
Speaker 1: keep going. An episode fifty five what to do when
Speaker 1: you feel like giving up feelings that we have all had,
Speaker 1: whatever your financial goal is. So episode episode hundred. Now
Speaker 1: we're at episode two eight two and we are going
Speaker 1: to talk specifically about motivation. And in this first article
Speaker 1: it is titled Unmotivated five reasons why you're feeling this way.
Speaker 1: So let's start by digging into maybe why you feel unmotivated. Jill,
Speaker 1: using your expertise on people, what did you think about
Speaker 1: this article? What did you think about the articles like
Speaker 1: the small cat on the side with the crown? From
Speaker 1: a professional standpoint, I think cats are really great motivators
Speaker 1: to care less. They really epitomize that. And that's, you know,
Speaker 1: coming from my professional expert opinion. It's really it's a
Speaker 1: great info graphics. So motivation it is such a tricky one.
Speaker 1: I think that they did a really good job of
Speaker 1: helping us figure out how we're made, what's going to
Speaker 1: make us tick, how we are going to be able
Speaker 1: to move through some of the goals that we've set
Speaker 1: in beneficial ways to have the behaviors and focus that
Speaker 1: we want to have. But motivation, it is, it can
Speaker 1: be quite elusive. We could chase after it, we could
Speaker 1: find it for a moment, we lose it. We have
Speaker 1: to rEFInd it like that. It just is a reality
Speaker 1: to life, and I think sometimes it is indicative of
Speaker 1: maybe is that not a good goal, or maybe as
Speaker 1: motivation not necessarily the end thing that I want to
Speaker 1: point out is it just how do I just keep
Speaker 1: going even in the midst of my emotions telling me
Speaker 1: that I want to stop or my body telling me
Speaker 1: I want to stop? And sometimes we need to pay
Speaker 1: attention to that. So there's so much that can be said,
Speaker 1: but I do think that this article gave a decent overview.
Speaker 1: I especially appreciate some of the things that they mentioned
Speaker 1: at the beginning before they even get into some of
Speaker 1: the reasons we might feel this way. What might lead
Speaker 1: to kind of this unmotivated state of mind can be stress,
Speaker 1: oversleeping or lacking sleep, potentially having unclear goals and priorities.
Speaker 1: We might just feel like we're not on a great
Speaker 1: path or accomplishing things or feeling purposeful or successful because
Speaker 1: we have not really clearly defined what it is that
Speaker 1: we're aiming at. Certainly, when we kind of are just
Speaker 1: sitting around or scrolling or engaged in a lot of
Speaker 1: really distracting, mindless activities, that's not going to always be
Speaker 1: the most motivating thing. It will kind of keep us
Speaker 1: in that cycle. Nutrition, how much, removing our bodies, whether
Speaker 1: or not we're exercise, I sing, all of these things
Speaker 1: can play into it. So I think one of the
Speaker 1: key takeaways in this is that there are many and
Speaker 1: multiple layers to this. It's not just going to be
Speaker 1: a linear path of I'm feeling unmotivated, so plug in
Speaker 1: this answer and done. It's this kind of ever evolving.
Speaker 1: Things are constantly moving and changing in our environments inside
Speaker 1: of us, and I think keeping a pulse on all
Speaker 1: of that is going to help us to identify why
Speaker 1: am I feeling unmotivated? What might this be connected to?
Speaker 1: And then hit it at that thing. Is it related
Speaker 1: to stress? Okay? Then how can I respond? Is it
Speaker 1: related to sleep? Okay? How can I respond? And again,
Speaker 1: that's going to come back to what we talk about
Speaker 1: very often of curiosity with self being aware of what's
Speaker 1: happening inside of us and our environment and circumstances to
Speaker 1: be able to respond well, not just out of guilt
Speaker 1: and shame of shouldn't be feeling this way? Yeah, I
Speaker 1: feel like they kind of put these solutions before the problems.
Speaker 1: So we are gonna talk about the five problems or
Speaker 1: reasons you might be unmotivated. But these are really like
Speaker 1: the ones that Jill kind of listed out, are not
Speaker 1: so much the problem, but you can look at them
Speaker 1: as like the solutions. So if you're not feeling motivated,
Speaker 1: then identifying maybe stressors that you can eliminate, or getting
Speaker 1: an extra hour of sleep, putting doing like a social
Speaker 1: media fast changing up some of the way you're doing
Speaker 1: your diet or your exercise, Uh, doing a task that
Speaker 1: you've been putting off that you really don't want to
Speaker 1: do doing it immediately. So getting over some of some
Speaker 1: of these things can really the solution to motivation. Because
Speaker 1: as you'll find over and over throughout this episode spoiler alert,
Speaker 1: is that the solution to motivation is just action, some
Speaker 1: type of action, not even significant action, just some kind
Speaker 1: of action, not even maybe in the direction like in
Speaker 1: the specific direction, but maybe in a peripheral direction. Because
Speaker 1: when we do any kind of action, when we just
Speaker 1: like get up off the couch, that can be kind
Speaker 1: of the instant like like my fingers, Yeah, something that
Speaker 1: we need to trigger a different like movement, like because
Speaker 1: the ball at rest stays at rest, a ball in
Speaker 1: motion stays in motion. It's not a ball, it's an object.
Speaker 1: But you get what I'm saying. So just being in
Speaker 1: motion or not being in motion, but like starting motion. Yeah,
Speaker 1: and this applies to anything I know we're specifically talking
Speaker 1: financial goals, and that's relevant and import and but I
Speaker 1: think we can lack motivation in all areas of our person.
Speaker 1: But usually when we're lacking in one, we're lacking in
Speaker 1: a few. And so it might even be to what
Speaker 1: you're saying, Jen, experiencing activity or motion in a separate
Speaker 1: area of life can then also have a positive ripple
Speaker 1: effect on our finances. So also recognize that making a
Speaker 1: move in anyone area of life could help us in
Speaker 1: the other areas of life as we start to feel
Speaker 1: the momentum of that. And this article, I will just
Speaker 1: say it's the title says five reasons. I could only
Speaker 1: determine four, so we'll go through all four. And if
Speaker 1: there's a hidden fifth, let us know. Maybe that list
Speaker 1: of things was the first one. Okay, let's go with that,
Speaker 1: So let's number two. The second one is having a
Speaker 1: negative outlook. I love it when these articles like say
Speaker 1: a number and then when you get in there the
Speaker 1: number is wrong. That happens more often than anything online writing. Oh,
Speaker 1: it's absolutely just for the title is for s c O.
Speaker 1: The article is you you never know what you're going
Speaker 1: to get, and that is literally why we do what
Speaker 1: we do because you never know what you're gonna get,
Speaker 1: and we get four. Uh So the second is having
Speaker 1: a negative outlook can decrease your motivation. And we are
Speaker 1: self fulfilling prophecies, aren't we When we are dwelling on
Speaker 1: the one bad thing that happened and ignoring the nine
Speaker 1: good things that happened, we become self fulfilling prophecies of
Speaker 1: our own progress, of our own like capabilities. We do
Speaker 1: to ourselves what we what we say we're going to
Speaker 1: do to ourselves. And so that's really like I see
Speaker 1: that in my life with like people around me, but
Speaker 1: I also see it in my life like it's able.
Speaker 1: It allows me to identify in myself when I am
Speaker 1: my own negative, self fulfilling prophecy, and that really makes
Speaker 1: me not motivated to be better if I just think
Speaker 1: I'm going to fail, if I think things are against me,
Speaker 1: why do better? You know? Why try? I think set
Speaker 1: a different way. This is also related to having an
Speaker 1: unhelpful mindset. I know, we talk about mindset a ton
Speaker 1: and how thoughts lead to emotions lead to behaviors, and
Speaker 1: so when ultimately all that's to say is it starts
Speaker 1: in our brain It starts in our thought patterns, and
Speaker 1: that has such a profound and powerful impact on the
Speaker 1: way that our lives then go, at least for what's
Speaker 1: within our control. There's plenty that is outside of our control.
Speaker 1: But for what we have influence over, it starts with
Speaker 1: our thoughts, and that's going to lead us down any
Speaker 1: number of trajectories based on what we're thinking and how
Speaker 1: we're perceiving what's happening. And that's not to say look
Speaker 1: at everything with rose colored glasses. We can still be realistic,
Speaker 1: but it also means giving space for looking at the positive,
Speaker 1: for looking at something in a more optimistic way, or
Speaker 1: looking at the things that are going well or right, again,
Speaker 1: still based in reality, but not solely focusing in on
Speaker 1: the negative, non beneficial things that are continuing to add
Speaker 1: to a lack of motivation. Then the next one, whether
Speaker 1: it's number two or three on this list, is forgetting
Speaker 1: about the long term benefits. And this can happen for
Speaker 1: all of us, and it's one of the things that
Speaker 1: I think it's important to recognize that always and forever
Speaker 1: keeping long term wise in focus isn't always possible for us.
Speaker 1: Like having retirement be motivation for me today in the
Speaker 1: day in, day out drudgery of life. That's not always
Speaker 1: going to be the best motivator, but certainly thinking about
Speaker 1: some version of long term I would even say mid term,
Speaker 1: or even on the shorter term, like what is it
Speaker 1: that this small task might be leading me towards, even
Speaker 1: if it's just an end product in a week or
Speaker 1: a month from now. We don't have to use the
Speaker 1: term long term in like a ten year time span
Speaker 1: kind of a thing, but thinking through what is the
Speaker 1: why behind this action, what can it be leading to
Speaker 1: can help us kind of regain some of that strength
Speaker 1: and energy to do the thing. I know. I have
Speaker 1: felt this way so many times, specifically in our renovation process.
Speaker 1: We're about two and a half years in on renovating
Speaker 1: like literally all aspects of this house, and there are
Speaker 1: so many times when in the end of a work
Speaker 1: day and I'm supposed to get now started on doing
Speaker 1: the reno projects, and I literally, for like the actual
Speaker 1: use of the term, I don't have any motivation. And
Speaker 1: that might be exactly coinciding with how much energy and
Speaker 1: literal physical strength that I have. But one of the
Speaker 1: things that can help me in those moments is if
Speaker 1: I do this now, I am one day closer to
Speaker 1: my kitchen being ready for me to host people in.
Speaker 1: I am one day closer to being able to have
Speaker 1: guests in my Airbnb. And that may not work all
Speaker 1: of the time, but sometimes keeping a little bit of
Speaker 1: that longer term focus in mind can help me realize, Okay, yes,
Speaker 1: I can paint another wall today, I can would fill
Speaker 1: some more trim. I can do this. We can do
Speaker 1: hard things. I feel the same way like I have
Speaker 1: to in order to not get frustrated and super sad,
Speaker 1: I have to kind of look at the uh, you know,
Speaker 1: we're renovating like the rental side of our house right now,
Speaker 1: and so in order to not get set about that,
Speaker 1: I have to look at things that we're going to
Speaker 1: be putting on our side of the house, um that
Speaker 1: I'm going to get to benefit from, and knowing the
Speaker 1: closer I get to finishing this rental, the closer I
Speaker 1: get to getting my oasis. So that is what I
Speaker 1: have to do, and remind myself to like keep going
Speaker 1: and prime that wall, paint that wall that's pretty much
Speaker 1: on capable. And as it relates to financial goals, I
Speaker 1: think this rings true in those circumstances, And they also
Speaker 1: high light celebrating small winds as you go, because we
Speaker 1: know just the ten, fifteen, twenty years down the road
Speaker 1: isn't always going to be enough for us. We need
Speaker 1: to be able to acknowledge and celebrate when we've experienced
Speaker 1: some of those smaller achievements. And so whatever way that
Speaker 1: that looks for you, whether it's long term financial goals
Speaker 1: or you're doing a renovation project as well, how can
Speaker 1: we also build in some celebratory pieces, some ways to
Speaker 1: congratulate ourselves of we are getting things accomplished. It's not
Speaker 1: remaining stagnant for as long as we keep moving. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I often forget to do that. I always want to
Speaker 1: get to the next thing and the next thing. But
Speaker 1: it is important to stop and recognize the completion of
Speaker 1: a season. So even if you don't feel like it is,
Speaker 1: it is worth it for just staying motivated in the future.
Speaker 1: It may not feel significant in the press, isn't But
Speaker 1: in the future, when you're lacking motivation, those past elements,
Speaker 1: those past celebrations, will affect how quickly you move on
Speaker 1: in the future. So the next one is setting unrealistic
Speaker 1: goals And I love this quote, and I think it's
Speaker 1: from Steve Jobs, is that we vastly overestimate what we
Speaker 1: can do in a year and underestimate what we can
Speaker 1: do in ten years. And I feel like that is so, so,
Speaker 1: so so true. We set goals for ourselves that are
Speaker 1: quite lofty because we are told to, but are in
Speaker 1: reality unrealistic because they're not backed by systems and strategies.
Speaker 1: They're just goals. They're just dreams, wishes that your heart makes.
Speaker 1: And then because we're not focusing on systems and strategies,
Speaker 1: we don't meet these lofty goals. And then and we
Speaker 1: don't obviously do in ten years what we could have.
Speaker 1: But for anybody who has paid off debt, and for
Speaker 1: everyone we featured in our debt free stories we talked,
Speaker 1: many of them thought it was going to take you know,
Speaker 1: five one year, five years to pay off their debt.
Speaker 1: Many of them saw their payoff in half that time,
Speaker 1: which is amazing because it was just a matter. Right.
Speaker 1: It doesn't happen for everyone, but for the people we
Speaker 1: talked to, it did, and so and in our own
Speaker 1: experience too, we thought it was gonna take five years.
Speaker 1: It took too. So when you get started on something
Speaker 1: and you're focusing on systems and strategies and just focusing
Speaker 1: on small steps, you can accomplish more in ten years
Speaker 1: than you've ever dreamed. But if you're just setting unrealistic goals,
Speaker 1: not backed by any plans or or mini goals, as
Speaker 1: the article says, then you're going to be suffering with
Speaker 1: a lot of motivation lost because it's just gonna be
Speaker 1: a lot of challenges, um, a lot of things that
Speaker 1: are going to feel hard to come back from. M hmm. Yeah.
Speaker 1: And the last thing on this list is not using
Speaker 1: your time wisely, and they say it's the one thing
Speaker 1: you can never get back. We often say it is
Speaker 1: our only true limited resource. We can often find ways
Speaker 1: to get more money, gain more resources, but time we can't,
Speaker 1: Like we all have the same amount of time given
Speaker 1: to us, and they kind of worked it backwards and
Speaker 1: saying if we feel like we're always running out of time,
Speaker 1: we can that can lead to a lack of motivation, like, oh,
Speaker 1: I just I don't have enough time. I keep losing
Speaker 1: time and keep running out of time. And so one
Speaker 1: of the solutions to this is certainly to get very
Speaker 1: clear on what our goals are. What is the thing
Speaker 1: that we are trying to find motivation for. Do we
Speaker 1: feel like we can define that really clearly? If not,
Speaker 1: if we can't summarize that in a sentence or two,
Speaker 1: then we need to bring more definition around it and
Speaker 1: then break it down, like like you just said, Jen,
Speaker 1: finding some more measurement to it, being more specific in
Speaker 1: what each step along the way is going to be,
Speaker 1: and be really realistic about can I accomplish that in
Speaker 1: that stated amount of time given all of the other circumstances.
Speaker 1: I think that's another thing that we can misjudge is yes,
Speaker 1: maybe it might only take two weeks to get one
Speaker 1: thing accomplished, but might it take longer if you also
Speaker 1: factor in the reality that you're a parent, and you're
Speaker 1: a homeowner, and you've got friends and family you need
Speaker 1: to see, and you've got these other projects, Like these
Speaker 1: are things we need to look at some of these
Speaker 1: goals within reality and then measure our time well within
Speaker 1: the midst of that and make it reasonable, make it attainable,
Speaker 1: and then follow through with that plan, stay on track
Speaker 1: with how are you using your timing? Again, this has
Speaker 1: been a huge one for us with the renovation. Is
Speaker 1: there really truly wasn't a ton of time because we
Speaker 1: both have jobs that we're doing and we're still traveling
Speaker 1: and hosting people, and so one of the things that
Speaker 1: truly did help me. I don't know that I could
Speaker 1: have worded it this way until I read this article,
Speaker 1: but we got really realistic with timing, like, sure, we
Speaker 1: may only actually need three weeks fully focused on the
Speaker 1: kitchen to finish the kitchen, but when we look at
Speaker 1: the reality of our season and circumstances, it's probably actually
Speaker 1: going to take us two months. And that has lifted
Speaker 1: a huge weight off of us of pressure and to
Speaker 1: realize it's okay to just give two hours a night
Speaker 1: to this. I don't need to feel like I need
Speaker 1: to get everything accomplished in one night to feel productive.
Speaker 1: And that has actually led to motivation rather than taken
Speaker 1: away from it, which has been helpful. Yeah, and that's
Speaker 1: where this prioritization comes in, because we always talk about prioritizing,
Speaker 1: and when you prioritize one goal, that goal gets done quickly, right,
Speaker 1: And so some people, for some people it might be
Speaker 1: their renovation is that I want to go really hard
Speaker 1: for three weeks, bust this out, and then not worry
Speaker 1: about it moving forward. But if that's not your priority,
Speaker 1: you can choose something else. Is that I want to
Speaker 1: take this season, you know, especially back in the holiday season.
Speaker 1: I want to take this season to rest two deep
Speaker 1: in relationships to HUGA, and I will put the renovation
Speaker 1: on the back burner and instead of taking three weeks
Speaker 1: and missing out on this season, I will stretch it
Speaker 1: out over two months. Neither one is better, and we
Speaker 1: do the same thing with our finances. As long as
Speaker 1: you are intentional about your choice and the c I mean,
Speaker 1: the choice you make does not have to be the
Speaker 1: choice you carry with you long term. It can be
Speaker 1: a three week choice or a two month choice, but
Speaker 1: it has to be an intentional choice. Yeah. Yeah, well said,
Speaker 1: I really want to get to this next article because
Speaker 1: I did enjoy it. It comes from CNBC and is
Speaker 1: titled how the pandemic Killed your motivation In six ways
Speaker 1: to get it back according to Science. Woof, that's a
Speaker 1: pack title. Yeah, because okay, so this is where we
Speaker 1: get down to strategy systems movement. This is the real
Speaker 1: key to regaining motivation because you're gonna lose it, that's
Speaker 1: just what happens. So these are the steps to take
Speaker 1: not all at the same time. This is a list
Speaker 1: of options two get your motivation back. And it's not
Speaker 1: just like it not they say the pandemic, because that's
Speaker 1: like a this was written in January, and that was,
Speaker 1: you know, a sexy thing to put in an article
Speaker 1: title This is anything. It is anything motivation. But what
Speaker 1: I really do like about the intro portion of the article,
Speaker 1: I felt as though this really hit the nail on
Speaker 1: the head that I want to highlight is motivation tends
Speaker 1: to drop when you feel a deficit in three key
Speaker 1: areas of life. Your our, your autonomy, competence and relationships. Again,
Speaker 1: I don't know that I could have summarized it in
Speaker 1: that way, But when you think about that and realize
Speaker 1: what is my lack of motivation connected to I think usually,
Speaker 1: at least for me, it is one of these three things.
Speaker 1: If I feel like my autonomy, my ability to control
Speaker 1: certain aspects of my life there influence some things, that's
Speaker 1: gonna really inhibit some motivation to do things right, Like,
Speaker 1: think about someone just told you to do something and
Speaker 1: there's no options about it. How motivated are you going
Speaker 1: to feel? It? Usually not that motivated. Your competence for
Speaker 1: something This one is so accurate for me. If I
Speaker 1: don't feel as though I've got the skill set or
Speaker 1: tools or resources to do a job, I'm going to
Speaker 1: feel very unmotivated to do that thing. I feel far
Speaker 1: more motivated to do the things that I feel competent in,
Speaker 1: I feel expert at. So it's definitely a stretching thing
Speaker 1: to do something that we don't feel very good at.
Speaker 1: And then relationship, that's that's why you listen to for girlfriends,
Speaker 1: but us and relationships. When our relationships are strained or interrupted,
Speaker 1: or we're feeling like we don't have great connection, that's
Speaker 1: also going to bear strong weight on our levels of motivation.
Speaker 1: I do appreciate that they highlighted all of these things
Speaker 1: were intersected and in some ways hijacked through the pandemic,
Speaker 1: and in some ways are still there's still a lingering
Speaker 1: ripple effect. So I don't want to say, oh, it's
Speaker 1: all over and this is just any time. While in
Speaker 1: some ways, yes, this is just related to motivation in general,
Speaker 1: but there could be ways in which this is lingering
Speaker 1: from what we've experienced over the last two and a
Speaker 1: half years, and the ways in which this is interrupted.
Speaker 1: The ripple effects of that and other life circumstances that
Speaker 1: might intersect with your autonomy, competence, and relationships. So if
Speaker 1: you are even wanting to start at the core of
Speaker 1: idea entifying why is this happening? Why can I not
Speaker 1: just seem to pick up steam here? This could be
Speaker 1: a really good template and blueprint for again being curious
Speaker 1: with yourself of am I feeling a lack of autonomy?
Speaker 1: Is it competence? Is it relationships? That's going to help
Speaker 1: us in identifying ways to respond, Well, if we can
Speaker 1: know what the root cause of it is really appreciated
Speaker 1: that portion, yes, yes, yes, But let's get into the
Speaker 1: six tips. The first one I loved create daily rituals.
Speaker 1: So a two eighteen study out of Harvard found that
Speaker 1: rituals and predefined any predefined sequence of actions characterized by
Speaker 1: rigidity and repetition increase people's self control and feelings of
Speaker 1: self discipline. So some people have really elaborate rituals, but
Speaker 1: the article says, these don't have to be elaborate. It
Speaker 1: could just be very small. Just as long as you're
Speaker 1: doing it every day, that's the important thing. So, for example,
Speaker 1: putting your workout clothes beside your bed, so that you
Speaker 1: can exercise first thing in the morning. That's considered a ritual,
Speaker 1: taking time to meditate or relax once you get your
Speaker 1: kids set up for the school day, who has time
Speaker 1: for that? If you do, it's a ritual walking your
Speaker 1: dog after work, So overtime rituals become automatized behavior. Rituals
Speaker 1: rituals automatized behavior. They become habits. Okay, rituals become habits.
Speaker 1: And when a habit becomes automatic, it frees up your
Speaker 1: mental energy to be able to focus on other things.
Speaker 1: So I love creating like just these different rituals throughout
Speaker 1: the day, and I kind of refer to them as
Speaker 1: habits stacking. I don't know if it's the same thing,
Speaker 1: but when you're trying to create a habit it, you
Speaker 1: stack it onto another habit um and eventually you have
Speaker 1: like a row of habits that can be considered a ritual.
Speaker 1: So maybe try that. That is really really good in
Speaker 1: my opinion, to create motivation. But just start with one.
Speaker 1: Don't don't start with a string of habits. Start with one.
Speaker 1: Really simple example of that is looking at your transactions
Speaker 1: for the day while you brush your teeth. That would
Speaker 1: kind of be like that habit stacking, creating that ritual
Speaker 1: if that's something you're trying to get better at or
Speaker 1: keep a pulse on. Again, it's going to be individualized
Speaker 1: for you. But pairing these different things together that might
Speaker 1: pair well and help you towards your goal keep you motivated.
Speaker 1: Related to this idea is number two setting up routine queues.
Speaker 1: So the article mentions how we are hardwired to forge
Speaker 1: these as siations between ourselves and the environment. There can
Speaker 1: be things within our environment that trigger certain thoughts, emotions, behaviors,
Speaker 1: sometimes subconsciously. One of the things that they reference in
Speaker 1: here is that it could have become confusing for people
Speaker 1: who are used to going into the office and and
Speaker 1: now are at home and have been maybe working from
Speaker 1: home a lot, where the couch or the TV is
Speaker 1: typically a queue or a trigger of it's the weekend.
Speaker 1: And yet if you're working from home and you're running
Speaker 1: into your passing by the couch or the TV regularly,
Speaker 1: it can kind of shift that in your mindset of
Speaker 1: but I don't want to be in a frame of
Speaker 1: work for work like I'm home and these are the things,
Speaker 1: these are my comfort items. And so this is also
Speaker 1: connected to I know we've talked about James clear with
Speaker 1: the habits and the cue, the craving, the reward, and
Speaker 1: how when we run into these triggers or these cues,
Speaker 1: what they can produce inside of us. And so we
Speaker 1: can use that to our advantage to set up cues
Speaker 1: within our environment that's going to keep us on track
Speaker 1: for the thing that we want to accomplish, the task
Speaker 1: at hand, the goal for the future. And so that
Speaker 1: might mean like putting our exercise clothing out the night before.
Speaker 1: Then when we wake up and we see it, that
Speaker 1: is an automatic kind of visual cueue of this is
Speaker 1: what's next on the docket. I don't have to necessarily
Speaker 1: bend over backwards to find the motivation to do the
Speaker 1: thing that I want. I'm creating these cues in our
Speaker 1: in my environment. This also is related to the physical
Speaker 1: space that we set up um maybe doing tasks or
Speaker 1: assignments in a space that's going to help us to
Speaker 1: stay focused on that task at hand and maybe even
Speaker 1: eliminate the cues or the triggers that are going to
Speaker 1: be those distractions. We can use this to our advantage
Speaker 1: when it comes to our finances as well. And we've
Speaker 1: talked a ton about ways to intersect some of our
Speaker 1: habits or patterns when it comes to impulse purchasing, setting
Speaker 1: up cues or barriers to not buy the things that
Speaker 1: we've not put a lot of thought or intention behind.
Speaker 1: So consider what your cues are, what are the things
Speaker 1: that might lead you down something that is beneficial or
Speaker 1: non beneficial, and figure out ways to intersect that with
Speaker 1: various cues. Usually it's going to be something related to
Speaker 1: our five senses. Something we see, something we hear, something
Speaker 1: we smell. Of course, it can be taste in touch
Speaker 1: as well, but primarily we're going to want to think
Speaker 1: about what we see, what we hear, what we smell,
Speaker 1: how does that maybe que us to something. Yes, definitely,
Speaker 1: cues are super super important when you when you find
Speaker 1: your cues, then you can start breaking bad habits. Next
Speaker 1: is to reward yourself right away. And so this can
Speaker 1: kind of be a little counterintuitive and not something that
Speaker 1: you should be doing long term. But we are instant
Speaker 1: gratification motivated like that. We're trying to get away from
Speaker 1: that as a as a pattern, as like a all
Speaker 1: the time, but you can't deny that is the way
Speaker 1: we are wired. So This kind of gets into the
Speaker 1: intrinsic and extrinsic motivation. I know we've talked about it
Speaker 1: in one of our other motivation episodes, so one of
Speaker 1: the other ones we talked about at the at the
Speaker 1: top of the episode. Internal motivators are things you do
Speaker 1: out of the joy of doing them. So I drink
Speaker 1: coffee in the morning out of the joy that it
Speaker 1: does nothing. I don't have to be motivated to do that.
Speaker 1: That is something I'll gladly do. Extrinsic motivators are external motivators,
Speaker 1: and that's what gives us the instant gratification that we
Speaker 1: need in order to develop internal motivators. You don't just
Speaker 1: like wake up in the morning with internal motivators automatically,
Speaker 1: Like when I was five, I didn't wake up and
Speaker 1: want coffee. So that's kind of like this is the start.
Speaker 1: You start really slowly with giving yourself a lot of
Speaker 1: instant gratification rewards for a short amount of time, and
Speaker 1: then you work up to being able to develop those
Speaker 1: internal motivators, which are study show much more effective than
Speaker 1: external motivators and much more long lasting. So you can't
Speaker 1: rely on external motivators long term. You have to want it. Yes,
Speaker 1: when you're starting, you've got to have them. So don't
Speaker 1: think the you are weak for needing more. External motivators
Speaker 1: are more immediate gratification, more upfront. It's why we um,
Speaker 1: that's why we you know, the debt snowball method is
Speaker 1: so popular. It's because you've got those instant motivators very
Speaker 1: quickly if you've got a number of smaller debts. And
Speaker 1: so this is the same concept. So they say, when
Speaker 1: you run on the treadmill, you could reward yourself with
Speaker 1: a favorite Netflix show, or you could have a treat
Speaker 1: like a cup of coffee or a piece of chocolate.
Speaker 1: You know. So these are not like take yourself out
Speaker 1: to dinner every time you make a good financial choice.
Speaker 1: These are small things. So think of things that you
Speaker 1: can use to reward yourself quite frequently up front, and
Speaker 1: that will help you kind of regain this routine of
Speaker 1: motivation and action they didn't have. Similarly, the next thing
Speaker 1: on this list is to make room for moments of
Speaker 1: positive ativity. And this isn't exactly saying external motivators. It's
Speaker 1: more so recognizing that cultivating some of those more welcomed
Speaker 1: viewed as positive emotions every day can have an impact
Speaker 1: on motivation and productivity. So this is something that we
Speaker 1: would want to incorporate and engage in daily. Even once
Speaker 1: we've turned external motivation into internal motivation, it is good
Speaker 1: to cultivate these types of emotions as well. And so
Speaker 1: they mentioned ideas like watching a funny video or shooting
Speaker 1: a text off to a friend, anything that is going
Speaker 1: to kind of bear weight on some of the more
Speaker 1: positive emotions that we can experience that can enhance our
Speaker 1: performance at work. It can give that nice break that
Speaker 1: we want. It can help us feel connected with others
Speaker 1: and involved in the community. It's just good to make
Speaker 1: room for some of these breaks in the midst of
Speaker 1: what we're doing, and especially for feeling a lack of motivation.
Speaker 1: It's okay to create space for some of this. And
Speaker 1: when we're talking about financial goals in the financial journey,
Speaker 1: this is absolutely included in that. To give room for
Speaker 1: fun and laughter, it can be free. It doesn't have
Speaker 1: to knock us off of our ultimate goals. But giving
Speaker 1: space to to play, to enjoy life, to do the life,
Speaker 1: giving things, to connect with others, just room for moments
Speaker 1: of positivity. And the last thing I will say is
Speaker 1: don't be too hard on yourself. I like this one.
Speaker 1: Uh So, this is where they actually start to talk
Speaker 1: about intrinsic and extrinsic motivation. And the article says, your
Speaker 1: motivation can ebb and flow, and it will ebb and
Speaker 1: flow and a lot of so the same like intrinsic
Speaker 1: and extrinsic positive motivators, we can have intrinsic and extrinsic
Speaker 1: negative motivators. So internally, if there is a trauma that
Speaker 1: we are trying to avoid reliving, or a consequence we
Speaker 1: are trying to avoid, then we are motivated to do
Speaker 1: something to avoid that. It can even be like if
Speaker 1: you're doing a diet bet and you've put you know,
Speaker 1: fifty bucks in and you're trying to avoid the shame
Speaker 1: of losing that fifty bucks, then you're motivated to do
Speaker 1: They work off of that type of emotion. And then
Speaker 1: there's also extrinsic negative motivators, which could be like external punishment,
Speaker 1: which you know hopefully don't see as an adult, but
Speaker 1: are there So this the there are both types and
Speaker 1: it's very it's a very weird phenomena that we are
Speaker 1: often very attractive to negative types of motivation. They seem
Speaker 1: to be more They are effective more quickly than positive motivators.
Speaker 1: And I don't know if it's like a loss of
Speaker 1: version thing or we are our own worst enemies. I
Speaker 1: don't know, but psychologically it is we're very drawn to
Speaker 1: these negative motivators. They work more efficiently. So knowing that
Speaker 1: there's always it's like salt in your strategy. Yes, there
Speaker 1: are some negative consequences to not sticking with your goal,
Speaker 1: and you should remember those. You should be fully aware
Speaker 1: of the negative consequences and the negative internal and external
Speaker 1: motivators that are in play. But like that's salt, and
Speaker 1: too much salt really does ruin the dish. So don't
Speaker 1: be too hard on your self. Let's focus on these
Speaker 1: positive motivations, these positive actions, the things we can do,
Speaker 1: and not be too hard of our on ourselves. When
Speaker 1: life happens, when seasons change, when you're just like having
Speaker 1: a day, you know, So that's I think really important.
Speaker 1: The last one on this list is to know your triggers.
Speaker 1: This is also called another way being prepared, knowing ourselves,
Speaker 1: being prepared knowing how we're going to respond, not thinking
Speaker 1: as though that's never gonna happen, or I'm going to
Speaker 1: avoid it. That's not possible. Things will happen, our plans
Speaker 1: will get interrupted, we will experience a lack of motivation,
Speaker 1: and what are the circumstances that primarily lend themselves to that?
Speaker 1: And how do I want to respond again? We can
Speaker 1: look at this from a variety of ways of what
Speaker 1: we might be facing in our lives as it relates
Speaker 1: to our financial goals. What are the things that cause
Speaker 1: the most derailment? Is it seeing other people spend money
Speaker 1: and feel feeling like everyone else gets to have all
Speaker 1: the good stuff and all the fun and everyone else
Speaker 1: makes so much more than me and whatever? It is? Like,
Speaker 1: what what is it that's going to cause you to think, Okay,
Speaker 1: well then I might just go buy this, or I'm
Speaker 1: going to go spend impulsively, or why even have this
Speaker 1: goal anymore? I'm going to just throw it off to
Speaker 1: the side, or is it an unforeseen bill? Whenever you
Speaker 1: get a charge that you weren't expecting. These things are
Speaker 1: going to happen, and it's okay for it to even
Speaker 1: knock the wind out of our sales for a minute,
Speaker 1: for a minute, but then regaining that strength and energy
Speaker 1: to keep going for the goal. That you've set out,
Speaker 1: assuming it's a good goal, assuming it's a goal that's
Speaker 1: actually worth achieving. Knowing what these things are ahead of time,
Speaker 1: and already having a script for how we're going to
Speaker 1: respond to that, whether that needs to be an internal
Speaker 1: kind of narrative script that we speak to ourselves, or
Speaker 1: if there's an actual plan of action that we're going
Speaker 1: to implement when this trigger happens. But we do need
Speaker 1: to take a good look at what are these things
Speaker 1: for me? They're going to be different for everybody, and
Speaker 1: how do I want to respond when they happen, not
Speaker 1: if they happen. Yes, absolutely, And you know what I
Speaker 1: respond to. That is the action I take when I
Speaker 1: don't know what else to do, whether foreseen or unforeseen,
Speaker 1: I'm always willing to take action on this the bill
Speaker 1: of the week. That's right, It's time for the best
Speaker 1: minute of your entire week. Maybe a baby was born
Speaker 1: and his name is William. Maybe you paid off your mortgage,
Speaker 1: maybe your car died and you're happy to not have
Speaker 1: to pay that bill anymore. That bill Buffalo bills, Bill Clinton,
Speaker 1: this is the bill of the week. Hey guys, my
Speaker 1: bill of the week is actually a parking pass that
Speaker 1: my husband and I purchased for the ferry. We we're
Speaker 1: going to catch the ferry and go over for the day,
Speaker 1: and there was an option of paying for parking, which
Speaker 1: would cost for the day eighteen dollars, which felt very
Speaker 1: monstrous to me, and I had a little argument with
Speaker 1: my husband about whether or not we should park down
Speaker 1: the street and just walk. But we also have a
Speaker 1: baby while almost two year old, a car seed gifts
Speaker 1: were bringing over for family, and we end up buying
Speaker 1: the parking pass, which I was initially heartbroken about. But
Speaker 1: on the way home, we missed the ferry and then
Speaker 1: we had to catch the ferry, which took two hours
Speaker 1: to arrive back to our home Vancouver Island, And after
Speaker 1: sleeping on the ferry and waking up disoriented, I was
Speaker 1: pretty happy in the end to have my car sitting
Speaker 1: right outside the door rather than a fifteen minute walked
Speaker 1: down the road. And that is my bill of the week. WHOA,
Speaker 1: that's that's a horror story bill. Yeah, I And that
Speaker 1: is the bill I would gladly pay at this point
Speaker 1: in my life. I always look for the free parking.
Speaker 1: Don't get me wrong, I'm always the first to look
Speaker 1: for it. But sometimes it's just worth it to pay
Speaker 1: for parking when you're in a season of your life,
Speaker 1: when you are carrying a human that cannot carry itself
Speaker 1: us get yeah. I mean it's a great hindsight, is Bill,
Speaker 1: And you made a great decision for yourself, or maybe
Speaker 1: your husband did pre pre what you knew was to come,
Speaker 1: and yeah it was. It ended up being a gift
Speaker 1: that you paid for that parking. I'm so sorry that
Speaker 1: you missed your ferry, but I do love the amount
Speaker 1: of listeners that we have in Canada. Shout out to
Speaker 1: all of our Canadian friends. Shout out to you. I
Speaker 1: am not going to embarrass myself by trying to do
Speaker 1: any Canadian celebration phrases. Thank you. Just shout out to you.
Speaker 1: If you all listening. Also have a bill that you
Speaker 1: initially didn't want to pay for but then ended up
Speaker 1: being very happy you did. Or again, your name is Bill,
Speaker 1: or you own a duck or you are Bill Curtis.
Speaker 1: Visit Frugal Friends podcast dot com slash Bill. Leave us
Speaker 1: your bill. We do need bills. This is a strong
Speaker 1: bill call calling all the bills of the week. We're
Speaker 1: at two episodes a week and the tank is low,
Speaker 1: if not empty, it's identified we need to we made
Speaker 1: a mistake and now it's time for oh my dear
Speaker 1: round shop you all right? So in this lightning round?
Speaker 1: What is your personal trick for when you're feeling unmotivated
Speaker 1: and go for a un Mine is literally just standing up.
Speaker 1: I and Lord knows, I have been very unmotivated. I
Speaker 1: am very pregnant, and I am not willing to do much.
Speaker 1: But when I have something I need to do, which
Speaker 1: is always, I just say, Okay, I'm going to just
Speaker 1: stand up because I'm always sitting down. So I'm just
Speaker 1: going to stand up, and whatever happens next will be
Speaker 1: better than what I was just doing. It doesn't have
Speaker 1: to be the thing that I'm actually supposed to do.
Speaker 1: Sometimes it isn't. Like Travis asked me to um put
Speaker 1: water in his avocado plant thing, and I got up,
Speaker 1: and I think I had the intention of doing it,
Speaker 1: and I did it. I did something else, and but
Speaker 1: just standing up was better than sitting down. So you
Speaker 1: got something else accomplished that you wanted to accomplish. I maybe,
Speaker 1: I guess I don't even remember what it was. I mean,
Speaker 1: I think that there is something too making making a
Speaker 1: movement to get back on track, doing the least with something. Yeah,
Speaker 1: just do the least. Yeah if yeah, For me, it's
Speaker 1: it is gum. If I were to think about how
Speaker 1: I got through college, undergrad graduate school, long days at work,
Speaker 1: it's taken a gum break. I can see do you
Speaker 1: take a break to chew gum or do you say
Speaker 1: I'm just going to move And the act of putting
Speaker 1: the gum in my mouth and chewing it is the trigger.
Speaker 1: Like it's like the act of okay, there's something for
Speaker 1: my mouth to do. It's kind of a little bit
Speaker 1: of a distraction. It feels like some movement. I can
Speaker 1: tell that I've had a particularly like stressful day or
Speaker 1: was really lacking motivation based on how many sticks of
Speaker 1: gum I chewed that day. But when I'm doing something
Speaker 1: that requires more focus, um um gets me through. M
Speaker 1: hm hm okay. But yeah, we can't those breaks. I
Speaker 1: think taking the breaks, whether for like a short term
Speaker 1: thing or a long term thing. I think when we're
Speaker 1: in debt payoff modes, having little pit stops along the
Speaker 1: way actually doing fun things on the budget night, or
Speaker 1: when we need to go through and look at all
Speaker 1: of our expenses like this. There's so many areas of
Speaker 1: life that all of this is relevant form and figuring
Speaker 1: out how to make it work in in our own way.
Speaker 1: Jen needs to stand up now. I just I was
Speaker 1: supposed to just start talking, and instead of words coming
Speaker 1: out of my mouth, it was you need to stand
Speaker 1: to get through our thank yous. No, I just need
Speaker 1: to say what I was gonna say, which is thank
Speaker 1: you so much for listening to this episode, um, and
Speaker 1: thank you for eating reviews normally. I'm not this tired,
Speaker 1: and we love, love love reading your kind reviews, especially
Speaker 1: this one from Julynn. I think that's how your screen
Speaker 1: names are just so fun and I can't say them
Speaker 1: and they say so encouraging in a real way. I
Speaker 1: really like the tips and the way this podcast makes
Speaker 1: frugality feel actually doable. The discussions are very applicable to
Speaker 1: every walk of life, and the realness is refreshing. I
Speaker 1: come to this podcast when I need a little push
Speaker 1: to keep going on the minimalist path, and then I
Speaker 1: don't feel alone in the journey, and we're here to
Speaker 1: be your little motivational push. Isn't that's so true? Podcasts
Speaker 1: can be that too, or things like watching debt free
Speaker 1: stories on the Frugal Friends podcast YouTube channel, or chatting
Speaker 1: with a friend who might have other energy levels than
Speaker 1: you do, or reading a book like whatever it is,
Speaker 1: you can find little ways to spark that and we're
Speaker 1: so glad that this is that for you. Jul Ni,
Speaker 1: I don't thank you. Thank you for listening, and if
Speaker 1: you enjoyed the show, please take a minute to leave
Speaker 1: a review and rating. It helps potential new listeners know
Speaker 1: what our show is all about, what they're getting into,
Speaker 1: so they don't waste their time if they don't need
Speaker 1: that little motivational push to keep going. See you next time.
Speaker 1: Frugal Friends is produced by Eric Sirianni Jill, I'm gonna
Speaker 1: muster all my energy to tell you this story and
Speaker 1: it's my are buying story. Hey, I need the time
Speaker 1: has come, all right? So I am a mini van mom?
Speaker 1: Now I am? We bought a minivan Mini van mom. Yes, moms.
Speaker 1: We have been doing research for several weeks on what
Speaker 1: we wanted and we were confident going in the make,
Speaker 1: model and year range of what we wanted. I say we,
Speaker 1: I mean I I wanted um mileage features. I was
Speaker 1: very clear with like a parameter. You know. Um, I
Speaker 1: wasn't stuck on one thing. So I have identified two
Speaker 1: possible vans and I go in Thursday to test drive one.
Speaker 1: It is my second choice. I know this, and so
Speaker 1: I sit down with the guy and he gives me, um,
Speaker 1: you know, a little just a light spiel. I'm alone,
Speaker 1: so I don't think he takes me seriously and yeah, yes, uh,
Speaker 1: And so then I leave and I pick up Kai.
Speaker 1: The next day, we go to test drive the one
Speaker 1: I really want. And for this one, Travis is able
Speaker 1: to get off work early. I say the day before,
Speaker 1: don't get off work early for this one. No need.
Speaker 1: I really want the other one. And so we go
Speaker 1: and he gets there before me, and because I have
Speaker 1: lost track of time, I have probably napping. And he
Speaker 1: gets there, you know, gets a sales guy. The front
Speaker 1: of the store is littered with people in black outfits. Um,
Speaker 1: and they are the salespeople. And it is uh quite
Speaker 1: nerve wracking on asleep. But we already had a salesperson, right, yeah,
Speaker 1: we already had a salesperson, so I didn't have to
Speaker 1: worry about them. So we go, we test drive it.
Speaker 1: I love it. It is the one that I want,
Speaker 1: and we go in and I will say these cars,
Speaker 1: these two cars had different features, had different pros, different cons.
Speaker 1: They were the same price advertised online, same to the
Speaker 1: five dollar one was five dollars more than the Yeah, okay,
Speaker 1: but they were comparable in their features where one, you know,
Speaker 1: one was newer, but it had more miles. One was
Speaker 1: older but it was very low mileage um. One didn't
Speaker 1: have leather, one didn't have a DVD pack. So there
Speaker 1: was just like they were comparable. They were not the same,
Speaker 1: but they were comparable. And we're sitting down with this
Speaker 1: man and who's not a man. He's younger than I am,
Speaker 1: and he did not know who I will us and
Speaker 1: I am negotiating with him for an hour and a
Speaker 1: half and I am I am just like, I am realistic,
Speaker 1: but I am not shy, like I know why I'm here,
Speaker 1: I know why you're here. I know like that you
Speaker 1: have tacked on an extra fee, which means you're pricing
Speaker 1: is not transparent. This is a superfluous fee. And then
Speaker 1: that really piste off the manager because he's like, it's
Speaker 1: not superfluous, it's ancillary, and I was like, no, no, dear,
Speaker 1: it's superfluous, and then the sales guy starts using that
Speaker 1: word because they just likes it, and I was like,
Speaker 1: it's a good word in fact um and so so
Speaker 1: like I'm trying. They tacked on all these fees, which
Speaker 1: is what I hate about dealers, and to the point
Speaker 1: where the best deal I could get after an hour
Speaker 1: and a half off was still four thousand dollars more
Speaker 1: than the guy the day before, who was just like,
Speaker 1: here you go his this is the value of you
Speaker 1: trade in, this is the car, this is our one fee,
Speaker 1: this is you know, the dealer. You're gonna pay a
Speaker 1: dealer fee. There's no getting around the dealer fee. It's
Speaker 1: all of the and celary fees that you can get
Speaker 1: around that not every dealership charges. So we were there
Speaker 1: and they had us like we were. We had a
Speaker 1: we had sunk an hour and a half into this negotiation,
Speaker 1: and so we had that um. We felt invested. We
Speaker 1: we felt like I felt like I was gonna waste
Speaker 1: I didn't want to waste this guy's time. And then
Speaker 1: we both had it was like in the same moment,
Speaker 1: Travis and I like looked at each other. He he
Speaker 1: his moment was first, but he looked at me and
Speaker 1: like it incited the moment in me, and it was
Speaker 1: just like what are we doing? Are we going to throw?
Speaker 1: And it was this really, this one feature that I
Speaker 1: wanted in the car that put it over the top
Speaker 1: for me. And I was like, am I going to
Speaker 1: pay four thousand dollars for fancy cruise control when you
Speaker 1: won't even cross the bridge to go to Tampa? You like,
Speaker 1: you will have no reason to use cruise control because
Speaker 1: ten minutes away you are not lying. And so we
Speaker 1: we had already signed the deal like they were running
Speaker 1: my credit and and we said, sorry, we have to
Speaker 1: go pick up our child. We're late, and we left.
Speaker 1: We left, and we went straight to the other guy.
Speaker 1: We we did have to pick up our child, like
Speaker 1: that was not a lie. And uh we went to
Speaker 1: him and we were like this, I mean, what's the catch.
Speaker 1: Because the warranty was better, the trade and value was better.
Speaker 1: There was total transparency in pricing um like the price advertised.
Speaker 1: The only fee added on top of that was the
Speaker 1: dealer fee. And then you've got your taxes you can't
Speaker 1: get around, and then the tag you know, transfer that
Speaker 1: you can't get around. That was it total transparency, total chillness.
Speaker 1: I know that was it. And then they took like
Speaker 1: three more dollars off or something when they we were
Speaker 1: in there telling them how much we love the deal,
Speaker 1: and then they gave us like another three hundred off.
Speaker 1: The takeaway is you can walk away. You can walk
Speaker 1: away any invested time and energy into something. You don't
Speaker 1: have to do it like pull the trigger, just based
Speaker 1: on feeling obligated. Yes, and you know what, you know
Speaker 1: how many lattez I can buy with four thousand dollars
Speaker 1: I can buy? Oh, this is bad, six hundred and
Speaker 1: sixties six to take you to buy that many lats? Right,
Speaker 1: And so that is six hundred sixty six decisions I
Speaker 1: don't have to make because I made the right decision
Speaker 1: one time. M m m m m m m. And
Speaker 1: it was not easy, but because you wanted that cruise control. Yeah,
Speaker 1: they had me, they really had me. But they didn't
Speaker 1: because they let you go. They let you go pick
Speaker 1: up your child. Yeah, and you never came back. I
Speaker 1: had gotten them down. I had gotten them down thousands
Speaker 1: of dollars. How many times have I told you? Since then?
Speaker 1: They sent email a few emails. Yeah, but I told
Speaker 1: him straight up. I was like, because I had the
Speaker 1: other deal on the table, which is why you always
Speaker 1: want to get multiple deals. I was like, this is
Speaker 1: what I've got over here, and and this is what
Speaker 1: you're working with, and you're it was a reconditioning fee
Speaker 1: that was like sellars. That was the biggest thing. And
Speaker 1: that and another fee because my car was over eighty
Speaker 1: thousand miles, they had a they took two thousand out
Speaker 1: of the trade and value. So instead of just giving
Speaker 1: me a number for the trade and value, they gave
Speaker 1: me a high number and then on the list of
Speaker 1: fees took two thousand off. So there's that like no
Speaker 1: transparency in pricing. But the reconditioning fee is like we're
Speaker 1: really proud of our reconditioning, Like we make these cards
Speaker 1: really like beautiful to sell. And I was like, that's
Speaker 1: your job. That's a price you put into the car,
Speaker 1: Like that's the price of doing business. That's the markup.
Speaker 1: That's not like this added fee that you add on
Speaker 1: the back. And I don't pay for you to recondition
Speaker 1: this car. You don't sell cars if you don't recondition them. Yeah,
Speaker 1: and that's a car, that's a price you bake into
Speaker 1: the price you put online. So it's just really was
Speaker 1: the deceptive practices that also just sent me running. I'm glad,
Speaker 1: I'm glad you've got a car. I'm glad you like it.
Speaker 1: I'm glad you didn't fall victim to spending an extra
Speaker 1: four thousand dollars. Can't wait to see it me Two