Speaker 1: Second date up to date. Over the years, we've had
Speaker 1: people with all sorts of interesting professions call in for
Speaker 1: a second date update. Oh yeah, for sure. And we've
Speaker 1: had a few former pro athletes, a movie stunt man,
Speaker 1: and one time we got a junior level auditor at
Speaker 1: an accounting firm. I mean that was interesting to me. Numbers,
Speaker 1: well most because my parents do all my taxes, so
Speaker 1: I don't know anything about that stuff. It's fascinating. But
Speaker 1: today's phone call is pretty special because we have someone
Speaker 1: on the line who says they have one of our jobs.
Speaker 1: And that's a professional stand up comedian, just like joke
Speaker 1: each other. His name is Harold, So please welcome to
Speaker 1: the stage. Harold. How's going everybody? Is that a fake accent?
Speaker 1: Is that part of your stick? Harold? Fake? Ain't nothing
Speaker 1: fake about me? Beer, but my finger nails I got on? Okay,
Speaker 1: all right, I like this guy. Al it's gonna take
Speaker 1: my job. Thanks for being with us, man. So um,
Speaker 1: before we get into your date, first, tell us about
Speaker 1: the girl that you met. What's her name? Oh, her
Speaker 1: name was Ashley? Okay, how'd you meet her? I met
Speaker 1: her through this date nap, But you know that's a
Speaker 1: whole other chick k boodle. Yeah, you never know how
Speaker 1: boring you are until you start feeling out that darn thing.
Speaker 1: I tell you, seriously, I feel like this is a setup,
Speaker 1: the whole thing for his next joke. I'm telling you though.
Speaker 1: But you know what, as I was feeling it out,
Speaker 1: I kid, you're not I realized, Hey, wait a minute,
Speaker 1: there's millions. I'm talking billions of people out here who's
Speaker 1: not dating me. What the heck is their problem? Yeah?
Speaker 1: I feel you, man, I feel that way all the time.
Speaker 1: I'm like, how came I only have two thousand people
Speaker 1: dating me? Where are my millions? So? Did she hit
Speaker 1: you up? Is she the one that reached out to
Speaker 1: you on the profile? Well? Yeah, I feel it. I mean,
Speaker 1: you know, I just want to meet somebody nice. You
Speaker 1: get into a relationship, yea, a serious relationship. To me,
Speaker 1: it's like freaking a marathon. It's all stupid. Huh. Okay,
Speaker 1: I thought you wanted to be in a relationship. Well
Speaker 1: I'm just saying I wouldn't mind being in one. But
Speaker 1: for the most part, you got to go through all
Speaker 1: this foolishes. Okay, can we just focus maybe a little bit.
Speaker 1: I'm really enjoying your perspective on life, Harold. But can
Speaker 1: we can we get to your date with with Ashley? Yeah?
Speaker 1: But I just very You wan't to know how I
Speaker 1: came about doing all of this. Well, okay, we got
Speaker 1: the idea you met her online, So yeah, exactly did
Speaker 1: you do with her? I mean we went out to
Speaker 1: go e too this restaurant? Carol, How was the conversation
Speaker 1: between you and Ashley? Because it's like this one. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I may I may know why she's not calling you
Speaker 1: about I tell you, I's gonna make her smile and
Speaker 1: laugh throughout this whole evening. Are you saying that you
Speaker 1: ran a comedy bit on her? Yeah? Well I'm not
Speaker 1: really a comedy bit. I just told her through things
Speaker 1: that I believe ben Like, for instance, I told her,
Speaker 1: I said, you know what, Ashley? She said, what, Harold?
Speaker 1: I said, you know you're like a jelly fish? Yeah,
Speaker 1: jeally fish. And I said, your body's ruldimentally and I'm
Speaker 1: just I'm scared to get near it. That was what
Speaker 1: they call a harroldism. Goody, this is where did she laugh?
Speaker 1: She chuffed out to all get out and then and
Speaker 1: then I followed it up with I said, you know what, Ashley?
Speaker 1: She said, oh what, Harold? I said, you know, relationships
Speaker 1: are the darnest thing. They're ninety percent of trying to
Speaker 1: figure out where we're gonna go eat at? Harold is
Speaker 1: her hair? I really I do appreciate, though you re
Speaker 1: enacting Ashley answering your questions, because I really feel like
Speaker 1: I'm there. Can we get back just to the date again? Well,
Speaker 1: how do you think your chemistry was? Do you feel
Speaker 1: a connection there? I did? I mean I was getting
Speaker 1: ready to walk her up to her door after we
Speaker 1: concluded a nice little dinner and walk around the lake.
Speaker 1: But I was telling her what I thought about doing.
Speaker 1: I'm sort of glad I didn't. She was like, well,
Speaker 1: what's that I told her? I said, I was going
Speaker 1: to wear a parachute tonight. Are just hear me out?
Speaker 1: I don't know why I was going to wear it,
Speaker 1: but I favor it was go start off a conversation.
Speaker 1: Wait a minute, we didn't have a bunch of you
Speaker 1: asked her wait, hold on through for curveball, and that
Speaker 1: one you told her you were gonna wear a parachute.
Speaker 1: And when she asked why, you didn't have an answer, right,
Speaker 1: I held it during my trunk, I said, I I
Speaker 1: got here and I didn't feel my mojo, and I
Speaker 1: didn't feel like myself. I was gonna draft on this
Speaker 1: here in parachute and walk in this her restaurant. There
Speaker 1: is actually a parachute there. That's what he said, the
Speaker 1: city on an actual parachute in the back of this
Speaker 1: tru I thought, parachute. You never know when a good
Speaker 1: parachute joke it's gonna come up. But think about it,
Speaker 1: somebody was gonna have to ask me. She was going
Speaker 1: to have to say, now, Harold, okay, why are you
Speaker 1: wearing this here parachute? But she didn't say that. Well,
Speaker 1: I didn't wear but I'm telling you, I feel good
Speaker 1: about myself and I had my moojo. Okay, well, I
Speaker 1: feel like I've gotten a pretty good idea. It sounds
Speaker 1: like you guys had a lot of chemistry. So maybe
Speaker 1: let's pass forward to the end of the day. How
Speaker 1: how did the night end with you? And as I'd
Speaker 1: like to get to the very finish, what's the last
Speaker 1: thing that happened? I tell you what now, and I'll
Speaker 1: be very sore flight with you For the first time.
Speaker 1: When I went there, I went in for that. They're
Speaker 1: little kiss and I was ready. Embracis you know like
Speaker 1: how they showed on television, just alone, drawn out, faint
Speaker 1: while you were weary of short, my god, and nothing happening.
Speaker 1: I mean, heck, but I tell you, I mean. I said,
Speaker 1: thank you, ma'am, and and I walked about four feet
Speaker 1: and I turned around and I said, you know, if
Speaker 1: you want, you can call me c beb bet. I say, yes,
Speaker 1: it stands for coffee bean, and then she says coffee bean.
Speaker 1: And I walked another two steps to my car and
Speaker 1: I turned around and I did a thrust. I said, yes,
Speaker 1: be calls I grind. So fine, there we go. I
Speaker 1: told her, just like nexwell house, I'm good to the
Speaker 1: last drop. Well, god, that sounds like a pretty great time, Jeffrey,
Speaker 1: in your in your mind when you look back on
Speaker 1: the day, don't ask, don't think the moment that could
Speaker 1: have gone wrong. Okay, well all right, okay, let's let's
Speaker 1: play a song and we'll come back and then we'll
Speaker 1: try and get you your second date up date. All right, CB,
Speaker 1: no good, I got a whole plethora of still you
Speaker 1: guys about all right? All right, we're gonna take a
Speaker 1: short intermission. We'll be back with more of second if
Speaker 1: you're just joining us for the second Date update. We've
Speaker 1: been talking with one of our listeners named Harold about
Speaker 1: his first date with a woman named Ashley. Now, Harold
Speaker 1: is a stand up comedian, and he went into a
Speaker 1: lot of detail about their night. But here are the
Speaker 1: main points that I took away. Okay, they went to
Speaker 1: a restaurant, he drove her home. Yes, he pulled a
Speaker 1: parachute out from the trunk of his car, and he
Speaker 1: even got a short peck at her doorstep, even though
Speaker 1: he was kind of hoping for a longer, sloppier kiss. Yeah,
Speaker 1: you are. What's the very end the CBE the coffee being, Well,
Speaker 1: he has a nickname he likes to go by CBE,
Speaker 1: which is short for coffee being because he grinds so fine. Yeah. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I feel like is a really important last ending shot
Speaker 1: of his d One thing was abundantly clear to me, though,
Speaker 1: and that's that he had a really nice time with
Speaker 1: Ashley and he's bummed that she's not calling him back. Now, Harold,
Speaker 1: about ready to make your phone call here? How you feeling.
Speaker 1: I'm just so approving of you? Guys doing this here
Speaker 1: for me. I mean I would jog an the other
Speaker 1: day and man, I saw this couple holding hands and
Speaker 1: i just started thinking about this little filly and I'm like,
Speaker 1: oh man, this makes me hopeful that one day I
Speaker 1: can find the right person that more hate that couple
Speaker 1: just as bad as me. Well, I'm just hoping it's
Speaker 1: gonna be Ashley. That's what I was feeling for. You
Speaker 1: can roast people together. I hope that for you too. Harold, Yeah, Harold,
Speaker 1: we didn't hear. I mean, have you reached out to
Speaker 1: Ashley and she hasn't called you back. There are a
Speaker 1: couple of Texas and I even called, but I got nothing. Okay,
Speaker 1: So you reach out to her, okay, answering your Texas. Well,
Speaker 1: maybe we'll have better luck here because I'm ready to
Speaker 1: dial her number and we're gonna try and get your
Speaker 1: second date up day. You ready to do this, man, Yeah,
Speaker 1: let's go for it. Remember this, wait until it's your
Speaker 1: turn to talk. Jeffrey'll handle it from getting I'll call
Speaker 1: you in when I think you should talk to her. Okay,
Speaker 1: I'll tell you, guys, that might be a little tough
Speaker 1: to do, because hell, I've got a lot of haroldisms
Speaker 1: I need to get rid of. Okay, we're all trying
Speaker 1: to get you another date, Harold, so just damp in
Speaker 1: the haroldism at Okay, let me try and get some
Speaker 1: answers from her. All right, alright, alrighty, okay, here we go.
Speaker 1: I'm in a dollar number right now. Hello, Hi, I'm
Speaker 1: looking for Ashley. Who is this? Hi, Ashould. My name
Speaker 1: is jeff from the radio show Broken Jeffrey in the Morning.
Speaker 1: Who did you say that we'll be on site? Okay.
Speaker 1: We're a morning radio show. Okay, we're called Brooke and
Speaker 1: Jeffrey in the Morning, and we're reaching out to you
Speaker 1: today because we heard that you love comedy. I'm sorry,
Speaker 1: what is this about, though, I'm confused. Well, we're a
Speaker 1: comedy radio show and we have a friend of our
Speaker 1: show who all so does comedy. Thank your friend. I
Speaker 1: held it might be I don't know. I'm okay, thank you,
Speaker 1: hold on, hold on. I'm sorry. I am fascinated to
Speaker 1: hear your side of the night, like he told us
Speaker 1: about your date and what we're doing here. It's called
Speaker 1: a second date update. We're trying to help Harold understand
Speaker 1: what went wrong during your first date, because, believe it
Speaker 1: or not, he doesn't know. Yeah. Wow, that's amazing that
Speaker 1: he doesn't. I'm yeah, yeah, so what is your help? Yeah,
Speaker 1: because we all understand that Harold is a one of
Speaker 1: a kind type of character. Else, Yeah, he sure is.
Speaker 1: You know, So is there something about him or about
Speaker 1: the date that was a problem for you? Well, you know,
Speaker 1: to be honest, um, some point of it was fun
Speaker 1: because he is a comedians of his jokes or even
Speaker 1: a little bit fun. Okay, but some of them I
Speaker 1: even have a punch fine, you know, like I just
Speaker 1: I just looked at him. Yeah, you know, he just
Speaker 1: talks a lot. Yeah, I'm not sure what you mean.
Speaker 1: But I mean, did he ever take a second to
Speaker 1: like ask you questions? No, that's the thing, and that's
Speaker 1: the thing that made me kind of go like, yeah,
Speaker 1: he's not going to work because for me, the number
Speaker 1: one thing I need is a phenomenal Well. I mean,
Speaker 1: sometimes people talk a lot when they're really nervous because
Speaker 1: they're out with someone that they like. Yeah, but that's okay, Okay,
Speaker 1: I get it. Did a glass of water, you know,
Speaker 1: like take a second. I understand how you're feeling that
Speaker 1: maybe you don't know if there's a bond there, But
Speaker 1: I don't know if Harold would necessarily agree with you
Speaker 1: on everything. You know, he probably would make a joke
Speaker 1: about it, or try to. I mean, there may not
Speaker 1: be a punch line. Did he try? He sounds like
Speaker 1: a sweetheart in his own way? Does he? How long
Speaker 1: can you last for that? A day? A week? No,
Speaker 1: I wouldn't even give it five minutes. Maybe just give
Speaker 1: it five more minutes because I need to let you
Speaker 1: know that Harold is on the other line listening, and
Speaker 1: he does want to talk to you right now. I'm
Speaker 1: he has not spoken an entire one word this entire time. Harold,
Speaker 1: are you there? It's been hard, I must say, Oh,
Speaker 1: but but I just want to clearify something real quick.
Speaker 1: And Ashley, I hope you know when I talked about
Speaker 1: putting one arm around you, getting my other arm putting
Speaker 1: it around you and squeezing you tight and just tackling you,
Speaker 1: I'll be honest. I was talking about relationships. Then my
Speaker 1: mind went to a football and I just went all,
Speaker 1: that doesn't make any well, that's what That's what happens
Speaker 1: when you're in love, Like things don't make sense anymore.
Speaker 1: Things start running together. Can I can? I ask Ashley,
Speaker 1: was there any jokes that made you laugh of Harold's
Speaker 1: and you said one about a pasta I'm trying to
Speaker 1: get I don't want to think about that. I don't think.
Speaker 1: I don't think we heard that one, discussed that one
Speaker 1: on the radio, so it's a live one, okay. But
Speaker 1: I tell you, I mean I would love to spend
Speaker 1: some more time with you so we can go over
Speaker 1: a few that was funny. No, no, no, no, Harold,
Speaker 1: you're missing the point, dude. Are you not listening to her?
Speaker 1: I'm gonna make the next all about her, That's what
Speaker 1: I'm trying to tell you. Now, how Harold, how are
Speaker 1: you gonna make it all about her? I'm gonna just
Speaker 1: sit back, relax, putting my feet up, have my guitar,
Speaker 1: and just sticks along while she's stopping away. Wait, guitar,
Speaker 1: give a little back background track her to talk over.
Speaker 1: That wouldn't be able to hear the answers if you
Speaker 1: play the guitar. Harold. Yeah, I mean, because you put
Speaker 1: me on the spot that I talked so much. I'm
Speaker 1: not saying a thing. I'm just gonna listen to you. No,
Speaker 1: that's not what she wants. That's exactly what she wants.
Speaker 1: She wants a man who is a very very deep listener.
Speaker 1: If you're not listening, if you're playing guitar, you can
Speaker 1: play guitar and listen. Harold sounds like a very multiti
Speaker 1: a person. To tell him, Ashley, tell him exactly what
Speaker 1: you want right now, Like, just listen to what I say.
Speaker 1: Ask me questions about me. Don't make me feel like
Speaker 1: you're testing out the dolts. Okay, do you want to
Speaker 1: give it a try right now? Harold? Why don't you
Speaker 1: ask her a question about her that has nothing to
Speaker 1: do with you. Let's practice. Do you like Whipray Ashley? I? Yes,
Speaker 1: I agree? Okay, Now do you like the little whip
Speaker 1: whip leather whip? Though? I'm just trying to find out
Speaker 1: about her, guy, Okay, I's trying to find out about
Speaker 1: what types of foods you like? And ask your questions.
Speaker 1: Ask her real questions, like about what she likes, what
Speaker 1: motivates her in life, what her pick it's like? Oh
Speaker 1: now there's specific questions. Okay, okay, let me ask you
Speaker 1: this motion porty quickly and of them all? All right?
Speaker 1: Do you like dn Max after dark or cho plus Okay,
Speaker 1: I like a plus. Okay, Okay, Now we get in
Speaker 1: some way. So are we getting to the end? That's
Speaker 1: what we need to get to. Yeah, I'm gonna be
Speaker 1: honest with you because I'm feeling some synergy here guys.
Speaker 1: And you know what, That's why I would love to
Speaker 1: ask Ashley, would you like to go out on one
Speaker 1: more date with Harold? We will pay for it. Dinner
Speaker 1: is gonna be free, and so are the jokes. Yea,
Speaker 1: the dinner sounds great. But to be honest, I don't
Speaker 1: think I could stand the heading of not being listened to.
Speaker 1: That's really a big thing for me. That's not shocked.
Speaker 1: You want me to leave the guitar home, oh my goodness.
Speaker 1: Or I could put it in the trunk in patient
Speaker 1: change of mind. On the date with the parachute the
Speaker 1: guitar together, Will you bring your ears? Certainly? Will? I
Speaker 1: have no problem with that. I just need to spend
Speaker 1: some more time with you. Really sweet, Actually, I mean
Speaker 1: you're jokes worth funny, some of them, some of them mean.
Speaker 1: I'm a be honest with you. You know, if you
Speaker 1: just eat a peanut butter sandwich, it's all good. But
Speaker 1: there is nothing like peanut butter jelly and banana. And
Speaker 1: actually you're that banana. Oh and you're the peanut butter
Speaker 1: jelly where I don't think. I don't think more romantic
Speaker 1: words have ever been said. Are you actually changing your
Speaker 1: mind on this? Actually? Are you actually turning? I don't know.
Speaker 1: I mean, oh, oh my god, this is working. I mean,
Speaker 1: boys and girls, do you hear that? Pathetic? There's some
Speaker 1: sinners up and this your error. I feel the synergy. Okay, Actually,
Speaker 1: we're sending you out one more time, even if you
Speaker 1: change your mind, You're going out on one more date
Speaker 1: with Okay, oh my god, you have to update us
Speaker 1: on this because I need to do the second night win. Harold.
Speaker 1: Are you feeling happy right now? I'm a little straight
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