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Speaker 1: Hey, lady, is doctor dom here. If you like this

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Speaker 1: show and you want to make your own, let me

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Speaker 1: tell you about the free platform Anchor. It's a creation

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Speaker 1: tool that allows you to record and edit your podcast

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Speaker 1: right from your phone or computer. You can add songs

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Speaker 1: from Spotify and create any type of content that you

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Speaker 1: are looking for. Anchor will distribute it all for you

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Speaker 1: so it can be heard on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and more.

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Speaker 1: Download the free Anchor app or go to anchor dot

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Speaker 1: fm to get started.

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Speaker 2: On this week's episode in her Space.

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Speaker 3: Hopefully your bedroom should be for sleep and sex. That's it.

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Speaker 2: What about eating snacks?

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Speaker 3: None of it? None of it, none of it?

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Speaker 4: Right?

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Speaker 2: Okay, girl, you ever been to a hotel that has

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Speaker 2: bomb as sheets and pillows where you're attempted to take

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Speaker 2: that shit own with you? Like, let me pack this

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Speaker 2: shit about suitcase. That is, I have never slept the

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Speaker 2: way that I like, I'm trying to save up my

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Speaker 2: coin so I can get that kind of you know,

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Speaker 2: mattress and bedding and all that at some point in life.

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Speaker 2: But girl, when I sleep in some of these hotels,

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Speaker 2: like it is the best sleep of my life. Like

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Speaker 2: I could close the b lines and just stay sleep

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Speaker 2: for hours.

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Speaker 1: Yes, and hotels know this, and so they invest in

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Speaker 1: that right Yeah, to make sure that one Welcome to

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Speaker 1: her Space, a podcast dedicated to uplifting women like you.

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Speaker 1: We're your hosts doctor Dominique Broussard, a college professor and psychologist.

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Speaker 2: And Terry Lomax, a techie and motivational speaker. In a

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Speaker 2: world where black women are often misrepresented and misunderstood, please

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Speaker 2: join us as we initiate authentic conversations on everything from

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Speaker 2: fibroids to fake friends and create a safe space where

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Speaker 2: black women can just be.

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Speaker 4: Welcome to season three of the heart Space podcast. If

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Speaker 4: this is your first time tuning in, thank you so

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Speaker 4: much for being here. You could be anywhere in the

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Speaker 4: world right now. You could be listening to any other podcast,

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Speaker 4: but you decided to be here, and dom and I

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Speaker 4: appreciate you. If you have tuned into the podcast before,

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Speaker 4: thank you so much for coming back and joining us.

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Speaker 4: I'm glad we didn't scare you.

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Speaker 2: Away, and I do want to let you know if

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Speaker 2: you are trying to figure out what podcast episode you

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Speaker 2: should listen to next, you got to check out our

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Speaker 2: episode from season two about anxiety. It's episode eight, and

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Speaker 2: it's called Is This What Anxiety Looks Like? This is

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Speaker 2: one of our most popular episodes right now, and we

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Speaker 2: talk about ways to address anxiety and why black women

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Speaker 2: have higher anxiety than others. So you definitely want to

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Speaker 2: check that out. And without further ado, let's dive into

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Speaker 2: this week's episode.

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Speaker 1: Thinking about anxiety ties perfectly into this week's episode. So

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Speaker 1: I quote of the day, the only time I have

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Speaker 1: problems is when I sleep. And that comes from the

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Speaker 1: late Great Tupac Shakure one more time. The only time

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Speaker 1: I have problems is when I sleep.

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Speaker 3: Not see.

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Speaker 1: When you hear that, what does that mean? The only

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Speaker 1: time I have problems is when I sleep?

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Speaker 2: I don't know. Dom. This is a tricky one because

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Speaker 2: when you shared it, I was like, what what does

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Speaker 2: he mean? What is he talking about? But I feel

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Speaker 2: like it's Tupac. So we gotta get digged deep, we

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Speaker 2: gotta go to the next level. We gotta think abstract, right,

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Speaker 2: we gotta go outside of the box. And so I'm thinking,

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Speaker 2: I mean, he was faced with a lot in his life, right,

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Speaker 2: So maybe it's because of nightmares, right, Maybe it's because

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Speaker 2: of the things he's battling with. I don't know. I

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Speaker 2: think sleep is like a lovely time. I love sleep,

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Speaker 2: I love to be I love taking naps like I

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Speaker 2: love sleep. So I I'm having a hard time understanding

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Speaker 2: what it means, but I would love to hear your perspective.

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Speaker 1: I think you were writ on it when you said

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Speaker 1: that if we think about his life and think about

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Speaker 1: what he was going through, that sleep was the only

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Speaker 1: time he had problems, probably because like a lot of us,

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Speaker 1: he dealt with anxiety, dealt with stress, dealt with depression,

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Speaker 1: and oftentimes that manifests itself in our sleep, especially if

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Speaker 1: we're not dealing with it in our day to day life.

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Speaker 1: And then we add on top of that, you know,

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Speaker 1: if someone is dealing with trauma, sometimes trauma may present

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Speaker 1: itself as nightmares or night terror disorder or flashbacks in

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Speaker 1: their sleep, and so there's a multitude of reasons why

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Speaker 1: he might have been having sleep issues.

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Speaker 2: That's a really good point. That's a really good point.

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Speaker 2: I didn't even think about that. I'm like processing what

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Speaker 2: you said, like, oh, okay, So I guess what that

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Speaker 2: makes me think of is our relationship with to sleep.

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Speaker 2: Like I'll talk about my relationship. I think I have

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Speaker 2: a good relationship with sleep. I really don't track my

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Speaker 2: I don't track the amount of time that I'm sleep.

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Speaker 2: I just go to sleep when I'm tired. If I

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Speaker 2: feel the urge to take a nap, I take naps.

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Speaker 2: But I know that I don't function well without sleep.

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Speaker 2: Some people are like, oh, I only need a couple

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Speaker 2: hours I need. I don't know how many I need. Honestly,

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Speaker 2: I just know that my body. I just when I'm sleep,

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Speaker 2: I listen to my body. When my body says it's

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Speaker 2: time to go to sleep, my body says I'm tired.

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Speaker 2: I typically try to go to sleep, and I'm a

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Speaker 2: light sleeper. No way, am I light sleeper? No, it depends.

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Speaker 1: Well, let's think about this. Do you have a general

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Speaker 1: timeframe in which you fall asleep at night?

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Speaker 2: Honestly, not really. I don't really think about it. I

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Speaker 2: feel like sometimes it'll be ten. Sometimes when I'm trying

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Speaker 2: to work on something, it might be midnight. It just

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Speaker 2: depends on what I'm doing in life. But I usually

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Speaker 2: feel like I get enough sleep. I'm not usually tired.

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Speaker 3: What time do you usually wake up in the morning.

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Speaker 2: Well, lately I've been doing a little workout routine, so

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Speaker 2: I've been up a little early.

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Speaker 4: Maybe around like damn, I'm just I don't know.

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Speaker 2: Don't I feel like what is my life? Do? I

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Speaker 2: feel like I don't pay attention to this part of

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Speaker 2: my life. So I really don't know. Like I don't

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Speaker 2: have a consistent time. Lately, I've been trying to get

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Speaker 2: up around between five thirty six. That does not happen

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Speaker 2: every day. So don't think I'm great for getting ever

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Speaker 2: early because that does not happen often. But maybe seven

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Speaker 2: to eight. I don't know.

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Speaker 1: So if you go to bed at let's say you

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Speaker 1: have a night where you were up late, and you

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Speaker 1: went to bed around like midnight one am, what time

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Speaker 1: would you generally wake up in the morning, Let's say eight,

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Speaker 1: So you don't have sleep issues or you're not concerned

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Speaker 1: about sleep because you're one of the rare people who

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Speaker 1: is getting the recommended amount of sleep a night. So

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Speaker 1: what we know is that what medical professionals and what

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Speaker 1: mental health professionals know is that six to eight hours

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Speaker 1: is what is generally recommended for adults.

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Speaker 2: I was just going to say, maybe maybe I'm taking

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Speaker 2: I wouldn't say taking my sleep for granted, but maybe

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Speaker 2: I am. Maybe I am taking my sleep for granted,

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Speaker 2: maybe that's not something that I think about because it's

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Speaker 2: not the issue for me. I know that there are

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Speaker 2: some people who can't fall asleep at night, right, and

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Speaker 2: I think for me, I don't really I don't think

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Speaker 2: I problem fall in sleep. If I'm tired, I could

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Speaker 2: be on the plane, I can be in the backseat.

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Speaker 3: It's like my car.

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Speaker 2: Like you know, I wouldn't say uber, I don't fall

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Speaker 2: asleep in ubers because you never know, or you might

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Speaker 2: end up just saying but I don't really have a

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Speaker 2: problem falling asleep, So I don't think it's something I

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Speaker 2: give much thought to, which is why I'm kind of

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Speaker 2: like stumbling, like, I don't know, I never thought about

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Speaker 2: that because it isn't so i'd love to learn more about.

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Speaker 2: I don't know what we can what advice we can

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Speaker 2: give people that may be struggling. Maybe I can give

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Speaker 2: some advice on what I do well.

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Speaker 1: I mean, I think that's a good point because, like

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Speaker 1: I said, you're one of the rare people who gets

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Speaker 1: the recommended amount of sleep, and so that's why it's

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Speaker 1: not necessarily on your radar. If you're someone who's not

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Speaker 1: getting enough sleep. Oh, you are fully aware of it,

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Speaker 1: like you are fully aware that.

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Speaker 3: You're tired. Either you're waking up groggy and at night.

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Speaker 1: They may even have difficulty difficulty falling asleep. We also

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Speaker 1: have people who can fall asleep but maybe have difficulties

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Speaker 1: staying asleep.

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Speaker 3: There's lots of.

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Speaker 1: Different causes for that, and we can kind of dive

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Speaker 1: in and talk about some of those. But I think

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Speaker 1: the biggest thing that I want to stress for us,

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Speaker 1: or want us to take time to kind of look

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Speaker 1: at and evaluate in our own lives, is what is

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Speaker 1: our relationship with sleep? So what multiple recent studies have

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Speaker 1: shown within the last four to five years, there's been

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Speaker 1: a lot of research on the connection between sleep, sleep disorders,

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Speaker 1: and race and what and we'll have the links to

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Speaker 1: the research in the show notes. But one of the

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Speaker 1: things that the National Sleep Foundation has found from their.

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Speaker 3: Research is that.

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Speaker 1: Most African Americans that means you, lady, are not getting

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Speaker 1: enough sleep at night. Most African Americans are getting fewer

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Speaker 1: than six hours of sleep at night, experiencing sleep apnea,

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Speaker 1: have poor sleep quality, and have daytime sleepiness. And we're

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Speaker 1: experiencing this on average less than white people. We're also

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Speaker 1: getting on average, almost a whole hour.

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Speaker 3: Less sleep than white people. Now why is that.

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Speaker 1: I think that we can think about it from like

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Speaker 1: a historical perspective and a cultural perspective.

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Speaker 3: So we know that just as a people, we.

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Speaker 1: Experience a lot of trauma, a lot of day to

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Speaker 1: day stressors, and those things will keep us awake at night.

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Speaker 3: If you live, let's say.

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Speaker 1: That you live in an environment that's not safe, You're

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Speaker 1: not going to get enough sleep because you're focused on

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Speaker 1: your safety. Let's say that you have an extremely stressful job.

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Speaker 1: You're not getting enough sleep because you're worried about your

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Speaker 1: performance on your job. Let's say that you're a graduate student.

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Speaker 1: Let's say that you're a professional trying to excel in

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Speaker 1: your field. Chances are you're not getting enough sleep because

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Speaker 1: you're trying to excel.

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Speaker 3: You're trying to.

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Speaker 1: Make sure that that thesis, that dissertation is done, that

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Speaker 1: you're past senior comprehensive exams, that you're submitting the next document,

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Speaker 1: the next you're doing the next presentation, whatever it is,

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Speaker 1: whatever milestone you're expected to achieve, you're focused on doing that.

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Speaker 3: And because we know that the stakes.

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Speaker 1: Are higher for us as African Americans, we're putting more

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Speaker 1: pressure on ourselves. The more pressure we're putting on ourselves

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Speaker 1: to excel. For a lot of us, that means that

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Speaker 1: the first thing to go is our sleep.

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Speaker 2: Now that you said that, and maybe think about the

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Speaker 2: fact that I've been sleeping well as like recently, but

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Speaker 2: I noticed that when I'm stressed, when I have anxiety,

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Speaker 2: there have been times the other night I just moved

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Speaker 2: and so the other night I was thinking about I

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Speaker 2: was up like kind ofly just literally my mind racing,

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Speaker 2: like how what should I get for this this room,

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Speaker 2: and like just thinking about different design ideas and just

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Speaker 2: I mean, it's not a stressor, but it's just something

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Speaker 2: that my mind was really really into when I was

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Speaker 2: trying to go to sleep. And so I think about

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Speaker 2: different instances in life where I am experiencing a stressful

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Speaker 2: period or I have something that's anxiety and inducing coming

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Speaker 2: up in life, for whether it's a presentation or a

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Speaker 2: difficult conversation. In those instances, it is kind of hard

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Speaker 2: to go to sleep and my mind is just racing.

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Speaker 2: And now see I don't think about this often, but

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Speaker 2: now think about it. I've come up with some things,

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Speaker 2: and so I know, for a fact that there have

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Speaker 2: been times when I'm like, damn, I'm tired. I would

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Speaker 2: love to go to sleep, but my mind is just busy, busy, busy.

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Speaker 2: Sometimes it's in a creative space where it's like I'm

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Speaker 2: thinking of ideas and things I want to do, and

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Speaker 2: so there are some things that I've been doing that

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Speaker 2: have helped me kind of come down, wind down and

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Speaker 2: get ready for bed. I'm not sure if we're going

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Speaker 2: to dive into that right now, but I do have

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Speaker 2: some tips.

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Speaker 1: Yes, we will get to that eventually, and I think

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Speaker 1: but one of the things that you pointed out that

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Speaker 1: I want us to also pay attention to is that

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Speaker 1: our lack of sleep is not always because of bad.

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Speaker 3: Stuff or stressful things.

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Speaker 1: Right, Like you said, like you're in a creative space

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Speaker 1: and you're like so amped that you're like, oh no,

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Speaker 1: Like I can't sleep because like I have fifty million

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Speaker 1: ideas running through my brain and I don't know how

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Speaker 1: to slow it down so that I can rest.

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Speaker 2: Remember back when we would get ready for our first

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Speaker 2: day of school, only got them fresh clothes, we got

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Speaker 2: our hair did and we're like, oh, I can't wait

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Speaker 2: to see who my new friends are at those nights

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Speaker 2: were the toughest. Oh my gosh, I remember it like

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Speaker 2: it was yesterday. Dom Like my mom will pack our backpacks,

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Speaker 2: our lunches, have our school supplies, like everything. It's like

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Speaker 2: your first day and it's so's you have a lot

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Speaker 2: of anxiety, but it's also very exciting. Those were the

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Speaker 2: nights where I could not sleep at all, and I

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Speaker 2: will wake up tied as a kid because you're so

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Speaker 2: excited for this new experience. Oh that brings that.

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Speaker 1: Good memory, yes, and see it's like little things like that,

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Speaker 1: and like for me, like I think back, you know,

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Speaker 1: as you talked about like the first day of school,

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Speaker 1: Like I thought about that, but then I also thought.

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Speaker 3: About even currently.

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Speaker 1: Usually if I'm taking a trip and it's a trip

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Speaker 1: for fun, like something i'm excited about, usually that night

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Speaker 1: before I can't sleep. And so now we'll ignore the

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Speaker 1: fact that I tend to be a last minute packer,

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Speaker 1: and so part of why I might not be sleeping

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Speaker 1: is because I'm uplate packing and I want to pay.

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Speaker 1: I'm one to like set an early morning flight, so

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Speaker 1: I might have a flight at six am and it's

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Speaker 1: midnight and I'm still up packing, So I literally may

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Speaker 1: only get a few hours sleep. Like I guess when

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Speaker 1: I do the math, that's like, what three hours of sleep,

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Speaker 1: which is absolutely horrible for your health. That is not

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Speaker 1: something we should be doing on a regular basis. But

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Speaker 1: I also know that even on those nights when I've

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Speaker 1: like really been good and packed everything and I'm in

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Speaker 1: bed at a decent time, my body is not letting

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Speaker 1: my mind is not letting me sleep because I'm so

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Speaker 1: excited about this upcoming adventure. And so in those instances, no,

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Speaker 1: it's not a bad thing that you're like to be

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Speaker 1: excited and to feel restless, But over time, if that

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Speaker 1: is your sustained way of being, it's not sustainable. Basically,

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Speaker 1: you're going to experience health issues. So getting less than

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Speaker 1: the recommended amount of sleep will eventually lead to health issues.

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Speaker 3: So particularly for us.

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Speaker 1: As women, as Black women, it can lead to weight gain,

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Speaker 1: it can lead to heart disease, diabetes, and it plays

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Speaker 1: an interconnected role in anxiety and depression. When I hear

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Speaker 1: all of those things, I think, Okay, maybe we need

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Speaker 1: to be doing something about our sleep, right And so

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Speaker 1: te when you think about because like you said at

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Speaker 1: the beginning of the episode, that you get your eight

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Speaker 1: hours of sleep. Can you think about anything that you

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Speaker 1: do in particular that ensures that you get those eight hours?

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Speaker 2: I would say that, let me see, I feel like

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Speaker 2: I do a good job of setting boundaries and like

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Speaker 2: prioritizing my sleep. I think that falls into the self

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Speaker 2: care aspect. And so for me, I'm kind of at

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Speaker 2: a point now in my life finally where I do

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Speaker 2: advocate for my needs. So if someone's trying to have

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Speaker 2: this long conversation, I'm like, all r it's getting late.

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Speaker 2: I need to go to sleep. I'm vocal about that.

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Speaker 2: I think also even when sometimes I might have a

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Speaker 2: you know, my colleagues and now we may travel somewhere

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Speaker 2: and they're doing like a late night chat and I'm like,

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Speaker 2: all right, shall my energy is low, I need to

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Speaker 2: go to sleep. I'll peace out right and let them know,

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Speaker 2: like I'll see you all in the morning. So I

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Speaker 2: think for me, just setting boundaries that's been super key.

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Speaker 2: And the other thing that I've done lately is having

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Speaker 2: like a wine down routine. Now I will say I

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Speaker 2: feel like I'm struggling with routine in general, So I say, oh,

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Speaker 2: I'm gonna get up at this time. I'm gonna do this,

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Speaker 2: I just be like, shit, just don't be sticking with me.

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Speaker 2: But I just do the best I can. I just

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Speaker 2: show up and I'm like, yo, I'm gonna try to

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Speaker 2: get tomorrow. So I don't really have a consistent routine

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Speaker 2: outside of we're going up, brushing my teeth and washing

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Speaker 2: my face. Like everything else is just like what we're

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Speaker 2: doing today, like it is what it is. But I

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Speaker 2: think when calling it sleep, there is like sometimes if

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Speaker 2: I I'm very anxious, if I'm struggling with anxiety, I'll meditate, Okay,

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Speaker 2: meditations key also deep breaths, Like there's a several apps

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Speaker 2: you can use, and I find that when you take

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Speaker 2: those deep breaths, by the time you get to like

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Speaker 2: ten twenty your sleep and you wake up the next

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Speaker 2: morning and you're like, oh, I fell asleep, right. So

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Speaker 2: I think that taking a bath, lighting some candles, I mean,

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Speaker 2: reading a book as well, so doing something other than

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Speaker 2: being on my phone. I've learned that being on your

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Speaker 2: phone late at night and doing something active isn't very

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Speaker 2: good if be trying to transition into sleep mode. And

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Speaker 2: so I think doing something that's sort of relaxing eases

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Speaker 2: me into that, and I see you smiling, don what's

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Speaker 2: coming up for you?

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Speaker 1: Because you're doing all the things that I normally tell

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Speaker 1: people to do when they're having sleep issues. So that's why,

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Speaker 1: that's exactly why it's easy for you to get your

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Speaker 1: eight hours. One of the things. So the first thing

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Speaker 1: that I like to tell people is to create a space.

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Speaker 1: Our bodies become conditioned to the spaces we create for them.

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Speaker 3: Right.

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Speaker 1: So one of the things that I remember when I

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Speaker 1: lived in Texas, and actually I had this one couch,

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Speaker 1: this purple couch, and all my friends who know me

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Speaker 1: know that I had a purple couch right all through

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Speaker 1: grad school and through my years in Texas, and I

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Speaker 1: would fall asleep on that couch all the time, to

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Speaker 1: the point that I conditioned my body that even if

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Speaker 1: I wasn't trying to fall asleep, my body knew once

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Speaker 1: you're in this certain position on this.

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Speaker 3: Couch, is lights out, nap time interesting.

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Speaker 1: And so you can create that same space, that same

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Speaker 1: environment in your bedroom. What I like to tell folks

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Speaker 1: is that your bedroom should be for sleep and sex.

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Speaker 3: That's it. What about eating snacks, none of it, none

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Speaker 3: of it, none of it. Right. Okay, So if you're

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Speaker 3: really trying.

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Speaker 1: To get good have good sleep hiding and I know,

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Speaker 1: like it's hard, especially if because one of the other

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Speaker 1: tips and we'll have the tips all laid out for

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Speaker 1: you on the show notes. But one of the other

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Speaker 1: tips is to have a good mattress and good pillows,

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Speaker 1: because that will affect your ability to stay asleep, to

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Speaker 1: get good sleep. I know, you know, you see all

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Speaker 1: these advertisements for all these like high end mattresses and

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Speaker 1: all these high end sheets.

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Speaker 3: It makes a difference.

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Speaker 2: Girl, you ever been to a hotel that has bomb

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Speaker 2: as sheets and pillows where you're attempted to take that

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Speaker 2: shit own with you, Like, let me pack this shit

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Speaker 2: about two cases. That is, I have never slept the

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Speaker 2: way that I like, I'm trying to save up my

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Speaker 2: coin so I can get that kind of you know,

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Speaker 2: mattress and bedding and all that at some point in life.

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Speaker 2: But girl, when I sleep in some of these hotels,

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Speaker 2: like it is the best sleep of my life, Like

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Speaker 2: I could close the blindes and just stay sleep for hours.

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Speaker 1: Yes, and hotels know this, and so they invest in that, right, yeah,

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Speaker 1: to make sure that one you get a good night's

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Speaker 1: rest and two that you keep coming back to that hotel,

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Speaker 1: and so we should do that for ourselves. So your

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Speaker 1: bedroom should be that inviting space for sleep if you

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Speaker 1: have the.

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Speaker 3: Ability to do it.

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Speaker 1: Because I also recognize that depending on where you are,

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Speaker 1: you might not have the space. Depending on your living situation,

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Speaker 1: that might not be an option for you. So usually

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Speaker 1: what I tell people is that at a minimum, your

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Speaker 1: bed should only be for sleep and sex. So even

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Speaker 1: if you have to have like a workstation in your bedroom,

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Speaker 1: or you have like a chair, or you know, you

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Speaker 1: have other pieces of furniture in your room, your bed

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Speaker 1: itself should be for sleeping sex. That way, you condition

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Speaker 1: your body that when you're in bed it's for relaxation.

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Speaker 1: I know that people like myself, I like to read.

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Speaker 1: If you're going to read in bed, one thing you

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Speaker 1: mentioned earlier about relaxation, so and not having an active

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Speaker 1: mind right before you're trying to go to sleep, so

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Speaker 1: not being stimulated. So if I'm going to read before bed,

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Speaker 1: I'm reading something that's relaxing me. I'm reading for pleasure,

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Speaker 1: research articles, chapters that I need to read for class.

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Speaker 1: I'm not doing that right before bed because that interferes

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Speaker 1: with my sleep.

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Speaker 2: And don't be watching the first forty eight before you

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Speaker 2: go to sleep. That's my show girl. I find that

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Speaker 2: when I've watched stuff like that, I have nightmares, and

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Speaker 2: I also do. I also want to speak to the

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Speaker 2: fact that you might be in a space of life,

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Speaker 2: or you're on a tight budget. Maybe you can't get

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Speaker 2: those bed sheets and that pillow. Maybe you just had

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Speaker 2: a baby and your sleep padding it's like out of

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Speaker 2: whack right now. Or maybe you're just in a space

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Speaker 2: where you're you're a single mom and you're just out

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Speaker 2: there trying to do what you can for your kids,

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Speaker 2: you're working two jobs. I personally, although I haven't experienced that,

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Speaker 2: I just want to offer a little ounce of hope

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Speaker 2: and saying that where you're at right now isn't going

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Speaker 2: to last forever. Right I'm being hopeful and we're speaking

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Speaker 2: this into existence that you will be in a space

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Speaker 2: where you can prioritize and focus on your ebbs and flows.

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Speaker 1: And there are ways that even in the what feels

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Speaker 1: like the most stressful, toughest times, you can still prioritize sleep.

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Speaker 1: So if you've got that new baby, you sleep when

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Speaker 1: the baby sleeps, right. If you don't have the finances

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Speaker 1: to buy the high end mattress or buy the high

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Speaker 1: end sheets. Again, at a minimum, don't do anything else

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Speaker 1: in your bed though, so that you can train yourself

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Speaker 1: to sleep when you're in bed. And so then once

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Speaker 1: you've created that environment that stimulates sleep, then like you mentioned,

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Speaker 1: you have to have that relaxing bedtime routine. And I

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Speaker 1: know some people like you said routine doesn't work, right,

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Speaker 1: that's okay. There should still you should have like your

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Speaker 1: toolbox of things that you'll do at night before you

435
00:25:02,119 --> 00:25:04,600
Speaker 1: go to sleep. And so even if you don't do

436
00:25:04,720 --> 00:25:08,520
Speaker 1: all of those things every single night, you do one

437
00:25:08,600 --> 00:25:14,840
Speaker 1: or two of those things so you have some good ideas. Meditation, reading,

438
00:25:15,560 --> 00:25:21,919
Speaker 1: bubble bath, prayer, whatever it is that is designed to

439
00:25:22,280 --> 00:25:30,120
Speaker 1: calm you down. So again, no reading heavy brain stimulating text,

440
00:25:30,440 --> 00:25:37,080
Speaker 1: No watching dramatic things on dramatic or traumatic things on television,

441
00:25:37,480 --> 00:25:43,639
Speaker 1: Put your phones down, Facebook, Instagram, all of that can wait.

442
00:25:44,320 --> 00:25:49,200
Speaker 1: Give yourself time. Put your phone down, turn off those

443
00:25:49,240 --> 00:25:53,800
Speaker 1: bright overhead lights, turn the TV off too. So if

444
00:25:53,840 --> 00:25:56,840
Speaker 1: you turn the TV off and give yourself a good

445
00:25:56,960 --> 00:26:01,040
Speaker 1: fifteen to thirty minutes to rest, to kind of just

446
00:26:01,240 --> 00:26:04,560
Speaker 1: wind down, that'll get you set up for a good

447
00:26:04,640 --> 00:26:07,119
Speaker 1: night's rest. I know that a lot of us, you know,

448
00:26:07,200 --> 00:26:12,240
Speaker 1: when we talk about like being achievers and setting goals,

449
00:26:12,760 --> 00:26:15,280
Speaker 1: some of us like to review our to do list

450
00:26:15,359 --> 00:26:18,840
Speaker 1: for the next day. That's what's causing you to stay

451
00:26:18,920 --> 00:26:21,800
Speaker 1: up at night because you're ruminating on all the things

452
00:26:21,800 --> 00:26:24,560
Speaker 1: that you have to do the next day. Save that

453
00:26:24,600 --> 00:26:27,240
Speaker 1: for first thing, when you wake up at night, before

454
00:26:27,280 --> 00:26:30,640
Speaker 1: you go to sleep, you reflect on the things that

455
00:26:30,720 --> 00:26:35,320
Speaker 1: went well, not the other stuff. The things that went well,

456
00:26:35,640 --> 00:26:38,600
Speaker 1: the things that you are grateful for. So again, the

457
00:26:38,680 --> 00:26:44,040
Speaker 1: goal is to put ourselves in a relaxing, peaceful mindset

458
00:26:44,680 --> 00:26:47,800
Speaker 1: so that it's easier for us to fall asleep, it's

459
00:26:47,880 --> 00:26:53,159
Speaker 1: easier for us to slow down. The other thing to

460
00:26:53,200 --> 00:27:01,480
Speaker 1: think about caffeine, alcohol, Do you use any of those things?

461
00:27:01,560 --> 00:27:01,840
Speaker 3: Terry?

462
00:27:02,400 --> 00:27:06,480
Speaker 2: So, typically I don't. I don't do coffee or anything

463
00:27:06,560 --> 00:27:09,280
Speaker 2: like that. I drink socially, but I'm not really a drinker.

464
00:27:09,720 --> 00:27:13,120
Speaker 2: But lately I've been doing this workout routine where there

465
00:27:13,200 --> 00:27:16,280
Speaker 2: are like caffeine pills that are like part of the

466
00:27:16,320 --> 00:27:19,680
Speaker 2: supplement pack that I take, and so I haven't noticed anything,

467
00:27:20,480 --> 00:27:23,119
Speaker 2: you know, out of the ordinary with that. Everything's been good.

468
00:27:23,359 --> 00:27:26,280
Speaker 2: But I'm also mindful, like, oh, okay, I'm now taking caffeine,

469
00:27:26,280 --> 00:27:28,520
Speaker 2: So I don't know if I haven't really noticed anything

470
00:27:28,600 --> 00:27:33,040
Speaker 2: just yet, but I can imagine that taking it often

471
00:27:33,520 --> 00:27:35,960
Speaker 2: can cause some kind of issue when it comes to sleep.

472
00:27:36,280 --> 00:27:39,320
Speaker 1: Well, what my suggestion would be is to pay attention

473
00:27:39,600 --> 00:27:44,280
Speaker 1: to the time of day in which you're consuming your caffeine.

474
00:27:44,480 --> 00:27:47,520
Speaker 1: I love coffee. I have to have coffee every single morning,

475
00:27:47,960 --> 00:27:51,040
Speaker 1: and so, but I know that if I have coffee

476
00:27:51,080 --> 00:27:56,280
Speaker 1: after twelve o'clock, chances are I'm going to be much

477
00:27:56,400 --> 00:27:59,480
Speaker 1: later than I want to be because my body isn't

478
00:27:59,520 --> 00:28:03,200
Speaker 1: used in a necessarily taking in high amounts of caffeine

479
00:28:03,400 --> 00:28:04,320
Speaker 1: in the afternoon.

480
00:28:05,480 --> 00:28:06,000
Speaker 3: Alcohol.

481
00:28:07,080 --> 00:28:10,879
Speaker 1: Now, we know that alcohol is a depressant, and so

482
00:28:10,920 --> 00:28:14,640
Speaker 1: it's supposed to for a lot of us because we hear, oh,

483
00:28:14,640 --> 00:28:18,000
Speaker 1: it's a depressant, that means it should make me fall asleep.

484
00:28:18,400 --> 00:28:21,280
Speaker 1: Well sure, and I know plenty of us that have

485
00:28:21,359 --> 00:28:23,560
Speaker 1: stories of like, well, I don't like to drink red wine, girl,

486
00:28:23,600 --> 00:28:29,640
Speaker 1: because red wine puts me to sleep. True, indeed it might. However,

487
00:28:32,240 --> 00:28:35,679
Speaker 1: consuming alcohol is not going to help you sleep throughout

488
00:28:35,720 --> 00:28:38,680
Speaker 1: the night. It's not going to give you the quality

489
00:28:38,760 --> 00:28:41,920
Speaker 1: sleep that you need. So if you consume a lot

490
00:28:41,920 --> 00:28:45,800
Speaker 1: of alcohol before bed. You may wake up multiple times

491
00:28:45,840 --> 00:28:49,200
Speaker 1: throughout the night, you may wake up the next morning

492
00:28:49,240 --> 00:28:53,880
Speaker 1: with a hangover. So then all of that was for

493
00:28:54,480 --> 00:28:57,000
Speaker 1: nothing because you didn't get the sleep that you were

494
00:28:57,040 --> 00:28:57,600
Speaker 1: looking for.

495
00:28:58,560 --> 00:29:00,800
Speaker 2: That's a good point. And I think about you know,

496
00:29:00,880 --> 00:29:06,120
Speaker 2: the National Sleep Foundation talks about how sleep is important. Right. Obviously,

497
00:29:06,160 --> 00:29:08,240
Speaker 2: people think that it's a time where your body shuts down,

498
00:29:08,240 --> 00:29:10,040
Speaker 2: but it's really when your body's doing work. So that's

499
00:29:10,040 --> 00:29:13,080
Speaker 2: when our body's repairing and restoring, and it plays a

500
00:29:13,080 --> 00:29:16,520
Speaker 2: critical role in our memory as well. And when I

501
00:29:16,560 --> 00:29:18,880
Speaker 2: think about other things, like if you smoke weed before

502
00:29:18,920 --> 00:29:21,120
Speaker 2: you go to sleep, for some people, it makes you

503
00:29:21,520 --> 00:29:23,440
Speaker 2: feel a certain way in the morning, you feel groggy,

504
00:29:23,480 --> 00:29:25,680
Speaker 2: maybe you don't sleep as well. I know I've experienced that,

505
00:29:25,960 --> 00:29:27,840
Speaker 2: and I've had friends that experience that as well. If

506
00:29:27,840 --> 00:29:29,360
Speaker 2: you smoke before you go to sleep, it's like I

507
00:29:29,520 --> 00:29:34,600
Speaker 2: wake up and I just don't feel I'm a little slower.

508
00:29:34,640 --> 00:29:36,800
Speaker 2: You know, I might still be high when you wake up,

509
00:29:36,800 --> 00:29:37,480
Speaker 2: like whatever it.

510
00:29:37,400 --> 00:29:39,720
Speaker 1: Is, right, there's lots of research out there. There's a

511
00:29:39,760 --> 00:29:43,800
Speaker 1: growing body of research out now about that about how, yeah,

512
00:29:44,680 --> 00:29:48,000
Speaker 1: it might we may get you to sleep, but it's

513
00:29:48,040 --> 00:29:50,920
Speaker 1: not going to keep you asleep and it's not going

514
00:29:51,040 --> 00:29:54,680
Speaker 1: to give you the quality of sleep that you're looking for.

515
00:29:55,720 --> 00:29:58,480
Speaker 2: Can we just say that you advocating for your rest,

516
00:29:58,600 --> 00:30:02,280
Speaker 2: for your sleep, that is an act of self care, right,

517
00:30:02,320 --> 00:30:04,680
Speaker 2: It's a bold act of self care. You deserve it,

518
00:30:05,040 --> 00:30:06,600
Speaker 2: you need it to be your best self and to

519
00:30:06,640 --> 00:30:08,680
Speaker 2: show up in the world the way that you were

520
00:30:08,680 --> 00:30:10,800
Speaker 2: meant to show up, you know. And so I think

521
00:30:10,840 --> 00:30:13,000
Speaker 2: it's really important for us to just advocate for our needs.

522
00:30:13,040 --> 00:30:15,720
Speaker 2: We've talked about self care and previous episodes, and so

523
00:30:15,760 --> 00:30:18,479
Speaker 2: it's important for us to advocate for that and tell

524
00:30:18,520 --> 00:30:21,160
Speaker 2: the people around us, like, oh, it's my bedtime, right,

525
00:30:21,440 --> 00:30:23,000
Speaker 2: I got to go to sleep, and just kind of

526
00:30:23,040 --> 00:30:26,280
Speaker 2: create routines around those in your life as well, so

527
00:30:26,280 --> 00:30:28,360
Speaker 2: that you can get what you need to be the

528
00:30:28,400 --> 00:30:29,080
Speaker 2: best that you can be.

529
00:30:29,880 --> 00:30:31,800
Speaker 1: I agree, and I think, you know, like I said,

530
00:30:31,840 --> 00:30:35,960
Speaker 1: we'll have these sleep tips listed in our show notes.

531
00:30:36,400 --> 00:30:38,440
Speaker 1: And I think one of the things one of the

532
00:30:38,480 --> 00:30:41,440
Speaker 1: reasons why we wanted to bring this up is to

533
00:30:41,520 --> 00:30:45,560
Speaker 1: think about or to acknowledge that this month month of

534
00:30:45,640 --> 00:30:52,320
Speaker 1: July is National Minority Mental Health Month, and we don't

535
00:30:52,480 --> 00:30:56,280
Speaker 1: usually think about sleep in terms of its impact on

536
00:30:56,320 --> 00:31:04,200
Speaker 1: our mental health. So we are fully aware of anxiety, depression, ADHD, bipolar, schizophrenium,

537
00:31:04,800 --> 00:31:08,040
Speaker 1: We're aware of all those other disorders, but we don't

538
00:31:08,160 --> 00:31:15,400
Speaker 1: think about insomnia, sleep, apnea, night terror disorder. Those are things. Narcolepsy,

539
00:31:16,760 --> 00:31:19,880
Speaker 1: those are things that are related to our sleep. So

540
00:31:19,920 --> 00:31:22,160
Speaker 1: that means that it is a part of our mental health.

541
00:31:22,720 --> 00:31:27,560
Speaker 1: And so I just wanted to encourage us to use

542
00:31:27,640 --> 00:31:30,760
Speaker 1: this month as we're thinking about Okay, it's a halfway

543
00:31:30,800 --> 00:31:33,720
Speaker 1: point through the year. What are we going to do

544
00:31:34,920 --> 00:31:37,440
Speaker 1: to finish out the year strong? One of the things

545
00:31:37,520 --> 00:31:39,840
Speaker 1: we can do is make sure that we are getting

546
00:31:40,080 --> 00:31:44,800
Speaker 1: enough sleep. Thanks for joining us today in her Space.

547
00:31:45,440 --> 00:31:50,280
Speaker 1: Please note that our show may contain conversations about self health, advice,

548
00:31:50,720 --> 00:31:53,800
Speaker 1: self empowerment, and mental health, but it is by no

549
00:31:53,960 --> 00:31:56,920
Speaker 1: means meant to be a substitute for an ongoing formal

550
00:31:57,000 --> 00:32:01,200
Speaker 1: relationship with a trained mental health provider. If you or

551
00:32:01,240 --> 00:32:03,840
Speaker 1: someone you know is in need of mental health care,

552
00:32:04,160 --> 00:32:08,960
Speaker 1: please visit the Therapy Black Girls Directory Psychology today or

553
00:32:09,120 --> 00:32:10,760
Speaker 1: contact your insurance provider.

554
00:32:12,000 --> 00:32:14,080
Speaker 2: If you liked what you heard and want to keep

555
00:32:14,080 --> 00:32:18,840
Speaker 2: the conversation going, connect with us on Facebook, Instagram, and

556
00:32:18,960 --> 00:32:24,720
Speaker 2: Twitter at her Space podcast or check out our website

557
00:32:24,760 --> 00:32:29,560
Speaker 2: at herspacepodcast dot com, and before we meet again, repeat

558
00:32:29,640 --> 00:32:33,560
Speaker 2: after me, I will not judge myself for where I'm starting.

559
00:32:34,080 --> 00:32:35,920
Speaker 2: I'm making progress every day.

560
00:32:36,080 --> 00:32:38,960
Speaker 3: Thanks for joining us. We'll see you next Weeklyady,