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Speaker 1: I started to realize that not being an expert isn't

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Speaker 1: a liability, it's a real gift. If we don't know

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Speaker 1: something about ourselves at this point in our life, it's

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Speaker 1: probably because it's uncomfortable to know. If you can die

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Speaker 1: before you die, then you can really live. There's a

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Speaker 1: wisdom at death's door. I thought I was insane. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: and I didn't know what to do because there was

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Speaker 1: no internet. I don't know, man, I'm like, I feel

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Speaker 1: like everything is hard.

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Speaker 2: Hey, y'all, my name is Kat. I'm a human first

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Speaker 2: and a licensed therapist second. And right now I'm inviting

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Speaker 2: you into conversations that I hope encourage you to become

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Speaker 2: more curious and less judgmental about yourself, others, and the

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Speaker 2: world around you.

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Speaker 1: Welcome to You Need Therapy. Hi, guys to Welcome to

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Speaker 1: a new Monday episode of You Need Therapy Podcast. My

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Speaker 1: name is Kat. I am the host, and quick reminder

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Speaker 1: before we get into the episode today that although this

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Speaker 1: is called You Need Therapy and I am a licensed therapist,

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Speaker 1: this podcast does not serve as a replacement or a

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Speaker 1: substitute for any actual mental health services. But we also

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Speaker 1: always hope that it helps in some way, somehow on

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Speaker 1: whatever journey you were on. Now today is going to

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Speaker 1: be a fun episode because we're actually talking about something

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Speaker 1: called the fun Scale. Some of you guys might know

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Speaker 1: what that is. I'm not sure if I've ever talked

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Speaker 1: about it on here. It's actually something that I used

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Speaker 1: to reference a lot, but then I stopped referencing it

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Speaker 1: and the information kind of emptied from my brain and

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Speaker 1: I kind of forgot about it, as things tend to do.

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Speaker 1: But it came up in a session this week and

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Speaker 1: I thought to myself, Hey, I used to reference this

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Speaker 1: a lot and talk about it a lot, and that

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Speaker 1: must have been because it was useful. So maybe this

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Speaker 1: might be something that you guys would want to hear about.

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Speaker 1: And again, maybe some of you guys already know what

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Speaker 1: this is, but for those of you that don't, I'm

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Speaker 1: about to give you a little fun piece of information

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Speaker 1: or pieces of information. And I've been trying to figure

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Speaker 1: out where I learned about this first, because I thought

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Speaker 1: it was from my coworker when I was in an

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Speaker 1: adventure therapist, but now I also don't know if it

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Speaker 1: was taught to me by a guy that I dated

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Speaker 1: a while ago who was very outdoorsy, and I can't

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Speaker 1: remember because this is actually something that is used generally

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Speaker 1: with outdoor activities. It's in that I don't know what

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Speaker 1: to call that, Like obviously I'm not an outdoorsy girl

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Speaker 1: that whole world out there like outdoorsman adventure community, but

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Speaker 1: the types of fun are often referenced there when they

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Speaker 1: talk about the different things that they do, like climbing

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Speaker 1: and hiking and camping and all of those crazy things

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Speaker 1: that go into being the outdoor human. AnyWho, I say,

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Speaker 1: we just get into it. So let's start with what

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Speaker 1: is the fun scale? So the fun scale is a

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Speaker 1: scale of fun that that goes from one to two

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Speaker 1: to three that identifies and helps classify different types of

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Speaker 1: fun or different types of activities. It's really simple. There

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Speaker 1: are three types, and you'll see the pattern as I

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Speaker 1: talk about each one, and you'll see that. You know,

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Speaker 1: fun isn't always just in quotes fun, Stress and challenge

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Speaker 1: can oftentimes be a part of that, and I think

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Speaker 1: that is something that is very valuable to talk about

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Speaker 1: because a lot of times when we think about fun,

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Speaker 1: we literally just think about one type of fun and

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Speaker 1: we're gonna talk about three. One of the reasons like

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Speaker 1: I said, I find this so helpful with talking with

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Speaker 1: clients that I work with and just in my own life.

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Speaker 1: Is it widens our view of fun, it widens our

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Speaker 1: view of enjoyment, and it widens our view of pleasure.

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Speaker 1: And I did a couch talks at the time a

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Speaker 1: while ago talking about pleasure and taking pleasure seriously, and

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Speaker 1: it was inspired by a post from the Angry Therapist.

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Speaker 1: I don't know if you guys follow him on Instagram,

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Speaker 1: but he put that up a while ago, and then

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Speaker 1: I talked about it on here, but he actually just

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Speaker 1: recently reposted it, which is kind of timely and interesting.

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Speaker 1: But I want to just read a little part of

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Speaker 1: that post, just to refresh us from what he said

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Speaker 1: back then, and he wrote, pleasure doesn't just fall into

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Speaker 1: our laps. We must seek it, create it, and lean

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Speaker 1: backwards into it with our eyes closed and our arms folded,

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Speaker 1: like it's a trust test, because it is, and if

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Speaker 1: you fail, your relationship with your life will be on

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Speaker 1: thin ice, your world will be small, your shoulders hunched,

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Speaker 1: knuckles white. There is more to life than building your empire.

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Speaker 1: There is more to life than finding love. There's more

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Speaker 1: to life than raising children. There's more to life than

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Speaker 1: finding a purpose. A complete life also means to experience pleasure.

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Speaker 1: And I read this that was the end of it.

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Speaker 1: But I read this to remind us all that experiencing

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Speaker 1: fun and pleasure are essential to having a full life.

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Speaker 1: And part of this podcast is created to help people

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Speaker 1: access the tools and the ideas and the things that

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Speaker 1: they need to live the fullest life they can because

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Speaker 1: we all know we just get one of them, and

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Speaker 1: we all deserve to have the most full life that

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Speaker 1: we can have. And the interesting thing about fun and

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Speaker 1: pleasure is there's so much guilt that comes with purposely

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Speaker 1: doing things for the fun of it. You know, you

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Speaker 1: get the I should be doing this, or I could

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Speaker 1: be doing that, and all those ideas come into play,

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Speaker 1: and it just feels like is it even worth it

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Speaker 1: if I have to then feel like I should be

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Speaker 1: doing something differently, or I don't deserve this, or I

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Speaker 1: didn't work hard enough for this. In this episode is

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Speaker 1: a just I just wanted to be a wonderful, good,

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Speaker 1: healthy reminder that one of the most common regrets of

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Speaker 1: the dying. We learned this. I've learned this through the

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Speaker 1: podcast and I've through conversations on the podcast, continuing to

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Speaker 1: share this information with you all over and over because

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Speaker 1: I think it's so valuable. But when when looking at

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Speaker 1: the most common regrets of the dying, two of the

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Speaker 1: most popular ones were and have been I wish I

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Speaker 1: didn't work so much, and I wish I would have

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Speaker 1: let myself be more happy. We think of things like

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Speaker 1: pleasure and fun as privileges, which they are to an extent.

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Speaker 1: This isn't a black and white conversation, but pleasure and

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Speaker 1: fun also don't have to involve what you initially think about,

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Speaker 1: these lavish vacations, expensive dinners, concerts that cost a bajillion dollars.

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Speaker 1: That's not just fun and that's not just pleasure, And

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Speaker 1: it kind of like bleeds into that self care conversation

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Speaker 1: of like self care only involves these lavish things like

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Speaker 1: massages and facials and trips and this, and that's not true.

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Speaker 1: I want to widenari idea of what fun is, what

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Speaker 1: pleasure is, and what we can get out of both

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Speaker 1: of those things, because the truth is, we really get

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Speaker 1: to be fun into our stories. This is not always

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Speaker 1: a privilege, it's a right as a human. Now, again,

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Speaker 1: the other part of this conversation is how fun can

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Speaker 1: look different and it's not that simple. Which fun sounds

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Speaker 1: really simple? Right? Sometimes fun isn't really fun at all.

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Speaker 1: And I'm sure you've said before, I don't understand how

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Speaker 1: that could be fun for someone or man, we have

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Speaker 1: different ideas of fun. If that's fun for you, I've

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Speaker 1: said that before, I've thought that, I've heard that when

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Speaker 1: talking to someone. And there are a couple of reasons

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Speaker 1: for that. One, because we're why you're different. Just like

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Speaker 1: we like different foods, we might like different activities. The

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Speaker 1: other is you may be thinking about one type of

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Speaker 1: fun when somebody else is thinking about another type of fun,

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Speaker 1: and they're different and they all get to be fun.

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Speaker 1: So let's dive into the three types. So type one

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Speaker 1: Type one fun is more enjoyable fun when it's happening

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Speaker 1: like it's simply just fun. Type one fun applies to

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Speaker 1: activities that you just generally enjoy when you're experiencing them

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Speaker 1: in the moment. This could be eating at your favorite restaurant,

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Speaker 1: having Marguerite's on a patio with your friends, game night

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Speaker 1: with your friends, or family, laying out by a pool.

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Speaker 1: Think of anything that sounds fun just in the moment,

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Speaker 1: like you want to be in that moment. These are

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Speaker 1: oftentimes leisure activities or activities that don't take too much

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Speaker 1: physical strain or mental toughness. They have a lot to

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Speaker 1: do with preferences too. So, going back to what I

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Speaker 1: said right before, we got into the types. You might

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Speaker 1: love watching a movie on a Friday night, why somebody

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Speaker 1: else might be like, that's so boring. I want to

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Speaker 1: go take a painting class, or I want to go

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Speaker 1: to this trivia night at this restaurant. Also think about

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Speaker 1: like vacations. Your favorite vacation might be an inclusive resort

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Speaker 1: in Mexico, and your friends might be skiing in Colorado.

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Speaker 1: And you know what, there's no way that I want

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Speaker 1: to go skiing in Colorado. If I'm going on a vacation,

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Speaker 1: I will go to Colorado. But that's not my idea

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Speaker 1: of fun. But take me to an inclusive resort in

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Speaker 1: Mexico leave me there for a month. So different strokes

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Speaker 1: for different folks, you know. So that's type one. It's

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Speaker 1: just very simple. There's not like a ton to be said.

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Speaker 1: It just is fun for the sake of the activity.

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Speaker 1: Now let's move on to type two. Type too, fun

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Speaker 1: is when a task is difficult at the time but

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Speaker 1: feels rewarding afterwards. Often this is because it challenges you

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Speaker 1: to test your limits and it produces growth in you

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Speaker 1: that you appreciate. And I'm not sure how much I

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Speaker 1: would grow by drinking and margerita by the pool. You know.

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Speaker 1: That's why that's type one fun. It's fun for the

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Speaker 1: sake of being fun. Type too fun includes things that

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Speaker 1: are more challenging and may not be as pleasant at

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Speaker 1: the time. They become pleasant and they become gratifying when

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Speaker 1: you are reminiscing on them and thinking back on them

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Speaker 1: and looking at what you gain from them. This would

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Speaker 1: include things like a workout class. Maybe it didn't feel

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Speaker 1: pleasurable when you were going when you were at that class,

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Speaker 1: but when it was over, it was really fun to

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Speaker 1: see progress you made, or to see the commitment you

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Speaker 1: made to yourself. I mean, think about if you start

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Speaker 1: going to a word workout class and you can't do

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Speaker 1: one pull up, and then a couple months later you

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Speaker 1: end up doing three in a row without a break.

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Speaker 1: That is type two fun. It's this you get this

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Speaker 1: gratifying feeling of Wow, I'm so proud of myself. I'm

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Speaker 1: glad I did that, and that can be applied to

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Speaker 1: a range of physical measures. That doesn't just have to

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Speaker 1: be with pull ups, you know, it could also be

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Speaker 1: like an art project that's extensive and tedious. And I know,

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Speaker 1: for me, I like creative things like I like doing

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Speaker 1: I remember when I was planning my friend's bacherette party

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Speaker 1: back it was in October. It was actually so fun.

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Speaker 1: I was very proud of myself because I'm not a planner.

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Speaker 1: I don't enjoy planning things. I don't enjoy being in

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Speaker 1: charge of an extravagant situation like that, but I like

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Speaker 1: being in the experience. So it was fun for me

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Speaker 1: to create that experience. And I did all of these

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Speaker 1: like artsy projects. The theme was my friend's name is

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Speaker 1: kiro So the theme was Camp Kira. We did it

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Speaker 1: in Ashville. We got this cabin and made this huge

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Speaker 1: backdrop with all these different like felt cutouts, and I

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Speaker 1: did this big like pendant sign to hang from the

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Speaker 1: house that said welcome to Camp Kira. And I didn't

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Speaker 1: enjoy the experience of making that for the sake of

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Speaker 1: making it, because I just don't like those tedious kinds

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Speaker 1: of tasks. But it was fun. For me to look

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Speaker 1: back and see what I did and see the dedication

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Speaker 1: and see how, you know, somebody being important to me

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Speaker 1: can encourage me to do something that I don't love

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Speaker 1: doing all the time, and then I actually loved doing

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Speaker 1: it because I was doing it for that person. And

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Speaker 1: then it was also really fun to look at what

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Speaker 1: it gave us, Like putting it all together, like this

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Speaker 1: individual pendant that I made wasn't the fun, but it

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Speaker 1: was putting all this stuff together and seeing the final product.

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Speaker 1: So that's a long way of saying it could be

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Speaker 1: like an art project that is really extensive and tedious,

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Speaker 1: and maybe you filling in all the little dots and

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Speaker 1: the da da da da isn't the fun part. But

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Speaker 1: when you look back at what you did and the

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Speaker 1: dedication you had, that was fun. It can be a

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Speaker 1: problem solving situation too, And it makes me think of

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Speaker 1: escape games. For some people, that's type one fun. For me,

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Speaker 1: that's type two fun. I don't want to be in

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Speaker 1: this escape game. I want it to be figured out.

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Speaker 1: We actually got one of those. It's not like a

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Speaker 1: murder mystery party. It was like a detective game. We

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Speaker 1: got Patrick and I got one from his sister for Christmas,

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Speaker 1: and we had our friends over and did it and

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Speaker 1: it was so tedious. There are so many details, and

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Speaker 1: there are some people that came over that were like

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Speaker 1: in it to win it, and they loved it and

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Speaker 1: did all this stuff. And I was the person who

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Speaker 1: was on my phone looking up the answers. And then

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Speaker 1: it was fun once I found the answer and once

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Speaker 1: we got to the end of it. But I'm not

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Speaker 1: somebody that likes to be in the nitty gritty. Some

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Speaker 1: people like that, so for me, an escape game type

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Speaker 1: two fun. Type two fun is something that is sometimes miserable.

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Speaker 1: When I ran my first full marathon, Oh my gosh,

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Speaker 1: When I ran my first full marathon, I immediately said

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Speaker 1: to my friend that was there, do not ever ever

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Speaker 1: let me do that again. I had trained meticulously, I

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Speaker 1: had this perfect, beautiful training board. I did all these runs.

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Speaker 1: It did my rest days. I trained. I was so ready. However,

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Speaker 1: the day that the race came, it just so happened

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Speaker 1: that it was pouring rain the whole time, and my

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Speaker 1: headphone stopped working because of the rain. Honestly, this memory

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Speaker 1: is a little fuzzy. I don't know if they stopped

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Speaker 1: working or I got scared that I was going to

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Speaker 1: get electrocuted for using headphones while I was raining, which

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Speaker 1: I don't know if that's something I should be afraid of,

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Speaker 1: but I might have been. So I chucked my headphones

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Speaker 1: and my phone to my sister when I saw her,

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Speaker 1: like in the first three miles, And so I ran

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Speaker 1: for four hours without any music, without any sound except

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Speaker 1: the voice in my head, and near the end of

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Speaker 1: the race, I could already feel my muscles getting tight.

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Speaker 1: I was like sore before the race ended, and it

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Speaker 1: felt like I was almost like running backwards or in

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Speaker 1: slow motion at the end. And when I finished, it

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Speaker 1: was my head. I remember saying, do not ever let

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Speaker 1: me do that again. But then a couple of days

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Speaker 1: go by and you are sitting less with the physical pain,

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Speaker 1: and the challenge feels farther away, and the feelings of

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Speaker 1: accomplishment and excitement start to pump back in. So I

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Speaker 1: look back at that and I think that was fun.

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Speaker 1: And you know, I did another one, and it was

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Speaker 1: that same idea. I didn't rain. It was a much

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Speaker 1: more pleasurable experience, also somewhere where the road was much

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Speaker 1: more flat. However, right after it was done, I did

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Speaker 1: not want to run another one. I wanted it to

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Speaker 1: be over rather than you know, when you're on the

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Speaker 1: beach with your friends, you want that to keep going

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Speaker 1: on that type one fun. This I wanted to be over.

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Speaker 1: But then I also, after I had those feelings of

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Speaker 1: accomplishment and challenge and seeing where my limits were and

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Speaker 1: learning more about myself, it encouraged me to want to

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Speaker 1: do something like that again. Another example of type two

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Speaker 1: fun would be like hiking up a mountain that is

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Speaker 1: not easy, but then you get to see this beautiful view.

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Speaker 1: And hike is strenuous and maybe not the most pleasurable experience,

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Speaker 1: but the experience becomes pleasurable due to the hard work,

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Speaker 1: and you learn about the power of working and experiencing

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Speaker 1: something good, and how effort becomes worth the effort because

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Speaker 1: of that reward. And I say this, and I harp

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Speaker 1: on this, especially I harp on type two fun because

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Speaker 1: so often people say like, oh, sorry, that's like not

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Speaker 1: worth it. I'd never run a marathon, I'd never go

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Speaker 1: to hike. That's okay, you don't have to do either

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Speaker 1: of those things, but I don't want people to miss

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Speaker 1: out on the goodness that type two fun brings just

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Speaker 1: because the initial part doesn't sound exciting. There is power

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Speaker 1: in working for a reward, and sometimes the reward you

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Speaker 1: get from Type two fun isn't even what you think

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Speaker 1: you're gonna get. There are so many benefits to this

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Speaker 1: type of fun and having this type of fun and

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Speaker 1: making sure you have this type of fun in your life.

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Speaker 1: And some of those benefits would be increase self esteem,

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Speaker 1: Like to see what you can accomplish and to learn

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Speaker 1: what your limits are versus what you assume them to

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Speaker 1: be is huge. The memories you get. I have so

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Speaker 1: many good fond memories, not just of things like running

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Speaker 1: a marathon, but memories of doing these hard things that

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Speaker 1: have bonded me with people, bonded me with myself, bonded

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Speaker 1: me with God. The memories are things that I cherish

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Speaker 1: a lot of times more than being in that moment.

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Speaker 1: Like I was saying with the Type one like, you

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Speaker 1: just want to be in that moment. But a lot

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Speaker 1: of those Type one fun experiences, some of them have

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Speaker 1: great memories, but some of them it's just me, Like again,

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Speaker 1: land on the at the pool by myself. That's fun,

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Speaker 1: But I don't hold on to that memory as something sacred.

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Speaker 1: Usually other benefits to this type of fun I kind

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Speaker 1: of harped on this, but just the self discovery and

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Speaker 1: this one is just so I don't know what it means

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Speaker 1: a lot to me because you cannot know if you

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Speaker 1: can do something until you do it. And the lessons

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Speaker 1: that these experience, these experiences give you, they're just I mean,

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Speaker 1: what's the word for, I mean infinite. There's so many

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Speaker 1: and you never really know what you're gonna get. You

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Speaker 1: can get to know yourself so much better in these situations,

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Speaker 1: and you learn what I actually can do versus what

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Speaker 1: I don't want to do or what I think I

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Speaker 1: don't want to do. What you can learn what's important

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Speaker 1: to me. You learn about what's meaningful to you, and

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Speaker 1: you experience feelings that you might have never felt before

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Speaker 1: if you didn't give yourself the shot to feel those.

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Speaker 1: The other thing that is so huge for type two

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Speaker 1: fun is the resiliency that it brings. And in this

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Speaker 1: type of fun, you have to walk out of your

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Speaker 1: comfort zone and you get into this stretch zone. You're

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Speaker 1: not in a panic zone here. You walk from your

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Speaker 1: comfort to the stretch zone and you really get to

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Speaker 1: learn more about what you are capable of. And I

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Speaker 1: know for me the live shows that I did with Amy,

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Speaker 1: that might have been type one fun for Amy. That's

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Speaker 1: what she does. She talks in front of people. She

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Speaker 1: is a host of personality. That's what I think that

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Speaker 1: she might thrive on. That I don't I need to

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Speaker 1: ask her because I'm assuming this. But that was not

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Speaker 1: type one front for me. That was very much me

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Speaker 1: walking straight out of my comfort zone. And looking back

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Speaker 1: on those experiences to me is more satisfying than being

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Speaker 1: in them. I'd rather see the accomplishment than like, do

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Speaker 1: it again, although I'm sure we're going to be doing

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Speaker 1: them again. But I learned so much about my capabilities,

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Speaker 1: my strengths, my feelings throughout that experience, and I know

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Speaker 1: what I can handle. And one thing about resiliency that

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Speaker 1: seems to be unknown to a lot of people or

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Speaker 1: just not thought about, is that the only way to

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Speaker 1: build resiliency is to go through something where you have

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Speaker 1: to be resilient. That's the only way to be resilient.

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Speaker 1: To build resiliency, which we all need, it is a

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Speaker 1: very helpful thing to have in your life. You have

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Speaker 1: to go through challenge. And so when we think about

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Speaker 1: having the most full life that is going to have

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Speaker 1: to include challenges in things that we don't expect and

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Speaker 1: things that we always don't want to do because we

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Speaker 1: have to be to actually build that threat defense system.

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Speaker 1: For our nervous system to be really strong, it has

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Speaker 1: to feel threat so then it learns how to work right.

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Speaker 1: Has to be activated. So if we want our nervous

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Speaker 1: system to be resilient, it has to be activated, It

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Speaker 1: has to learn, it has to have experiences. And so

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Speaker 1: type two gives us a lot of opportunity to build

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Speaker 1: that resilience without it pushing us too far into that

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Speaker 1: panic zone that would be like hey, firefire, Like we

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Speaker 1: got to get out of here.

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Speaker 2: Now.

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Speaker 1: You might think that sometimes, but Type two fund doesn't,

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Speaker 1: in my opinion, include a life or death situation. And

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Speaker 1: then the last thing that I mean, there's way more.

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Speaker 1: But the last thing I'm going to say that type

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Speaker 1: two fun really brings us is gratitude, which again is

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Speaker 1: one of those things that it seems like it's said

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Speaker 1: all the time, but it's such an important thing to

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Speaker 1: hold onto and to cultivate in our lives. And not

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Speaker 1: only do you build gratitude for your body and your

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Speaker 1: mind and your spirit for keeping you and pushing you

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Speaker 1: and sharing you. Through the toughness of the experience, you

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Speaker 1: get to build gratitude for the ease of life as well,

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Speaker 1: and knowing how hard something can be allows us to

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Speaker 1: be more present in the even moments of life, the

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00:20:08,160 --> 00:20:10,479
Speaker 1: mundane moments of life that actually can be a lot

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Speaker 1: of the goodness of our lives. The only way to

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Speaker 1: truly have gratitude for our mountaintop moments is by knowing

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Speaker 1: that the valleys exist and by experiencing the valley and

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Speaker 1: of running a marathon wasn't hard for me, I don't

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Speaker 1: know that I would appreciate the accomplishment so much, and

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Speaker 1: I also wouldn't appreciate my nice, short, leisurely runs as

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Speaker 1: much these days either. So to wrap that whole section up,

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Speaker 1: Type two fun is really a type of fun that

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Speaker 1: is so fun because of the growth that it creates

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00:20:42,800 --> 00:20:44,760
Speaker 1: for us and the opportunity for growth that it creates

401
00:20:44,760 --> 00:20:49,600
Speaker 1: for us. And discomfort is a key ingredient for growth,

402
00:20:50,160 --> 00:20:52,760
Speaker 1: and that is why that's a big part of this

403
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Speaker 1: type of fun. But discomfort can still be fun. Let's

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Speaker 1: move on to type three fun, the last type of fun,

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00:20:59,320 --> 00:21:03,920
Speaker 1: and I I gotta say this is my least favorite

406
00:21:03,960 --> 00:21:06,160
Speaker 1: type of fun. It's a fun that I do would

407
00:21:06,160 --> 00:21:08,639
Speaker 1: never look forward to, and I don't really want to

408
00:21:08,720 --> 00:21:11,400
Speaker 1: always have in my life, but I need it. It's

409
00:21:11,440 --> 00:21:14,320
Speaker 1: actually not fun at all, which is kind of confusing

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00:21:14,400 --> 00:21:17,560
Speaker 1: in this whole conversation. But it's something that is not

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Speaker 1: fun in the moment, and you never want to do

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Speaker 1: it again. The pleasurable part of this type of fun

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00:21:24,400 --> 00:21:26,720
Speaker 1: is getting to tell the story of it, which might

414
00:21:26,760 --> 00:21:28,800
Speaker 1: sound weird, but we've actually all been here and we

415
00:21:28,840 --> 00:21:31,639
Speaker 1: all have these types of fun. It's when we have

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Speaker 1: those dreadful experiences that turn into the classic like dinner

417
00:21:34,320 --> 00:21:37,480
Speaker 1: table story that leaves you and your friends like dying

418
00:21:37,560 --> 00:21:40,920
Speaker 1: laughing hysterically, or like zoned in waiting in awe of

419
00:21:40,960 --> 00:21:43,600
Speaker 1: like the next thing that will happen, but you don't

420
00:21:43,640 --> 00:21:46,639
Speaker 1: want this experience to happen again. And it can be

421
00:21:46,640 --> 00:21:50,040
Speaker 1: something physical like you hiked I don't know, the Appalachian

422
00:21:50,080 --> 00:21:52,160
Speaker 1: Trail and you got caught in some kind of natural

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Speaker 1: disaster and maybe you did have this life or death situation,

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00:21:55,640 --> 00:21:59,280
Speaker 1: maybe you encountered a deadly animal. Or it can be

425
00:21:59,359 --> 00:22:01,600
Speaker 1: something like the time you fell off the treadmill at

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Speaker 1: the gym in front of a bunch of people, which

427
00:22:04,160 --> 00:22:06,600
Speaker 1: I know those are like viral videos that are going

428
00:22:06,640 --> 00:22:09,520
Speaker 1: around on Instagram and TikTok and stuff like that. But

429
00:22:09,640 --> 00:22:12,480
Speaker 1: I say that because I have a friend who's notorious

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Speaker 1: for falling, and I think that she would probably choose

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Speaker 1: to never fall in public again. But she has one

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00:22:18,040 --> 00:22:21,359
Speaker 1: story where she fell off of a treadmill at a

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Speaker 1: workout class. Repeatedly. It's like she fell and then she

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Speaker 1: tried to get up and like just walk it off,

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Speaker 1: but then she fell again and it was just a

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Speaker 1: whole thing. And I know that she doesn't want that

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Speaker 1: to happen again. That would be kind of crazy for

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Speaker 1: her to desire that, but it also has brought us

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Speaker 1: some of the best moments of laughter, and we reminisce

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00:22:40,240 --> 00:22:43,080
Speaker 1: on that story over and over again. And honestly, I

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00:22:43,119 --> 00:22:45,479
Speaker 1: wasn't even there. I just heard about it. The trainer

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00:22:45,520 --> 00:22:48,040
Speaker 1: actually came up to me the next day and was like, Hey,

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Speaker 1: is your friend okay, And I was like, what are

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00:22:49,840 --> 00:22:52,280
Speaker 1: you talking about. He was like, oh, you didn't hear.

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Speaker 1: So it's just become this like famous story in our

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Speaker 1: front group. And so again that's an example of yeah,

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00:22:59,160 --> 00:23:02,240
Speaker 1: not something you really look forward to. But it's those

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00:23:02,240 --> 00:23:05,159
Speaker 1: things that you're glad that they happened. It can also

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00:23:05,240 --> 00:23:08,800
Speaker 1: be a grueling experience physical well, and I will say

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00:23:09,240 --> 00:23:11,680
Speaker 1: those things that you're glad that they happened. Not all

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Speaker 1: the time you're like, yes, I'm glad that I fall

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Speaker 1: off the treadmill. But there's something to there's some pleasure

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Speaker 1: to be gained in being able to tell a story

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Speaker 1: like that. And again, it can be a grueling experience

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Speaker 1: physically or mentally. Maybe a story about the time you

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Speaker 1: broke a bone playing a sport, like you don't want

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Speaker 1: to break a bone, but maybe there's this crazy story

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Speaker 1: that you get to tell the story or get this

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Speaker 1: glory from this experience. Or it's something like I don't know,

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00:23:35,200 --> 00:23:37,440
Speaker 1: you dropped your phone in the ocean while you're on

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Speaker 1: an out of country vacation and then you're stranded without

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Speaker 1: a phone and you have to do all this stuff

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00:23:42,200 --> 00:23:44,400
Speaker 1: to figure out how to contact and get a new one.

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00:23:44,480 --> 00:23:47,159
Speaker 1: And it's a great story. But we hope that never

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00:23:47,200 --> 00:23:49,680
Speaker 1: happens to us again. So those are the three types

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Speaker 1: of fun. That is the fun scale. And I believe

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Speaker 1: that to live fully we need a nice mixture of these,

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Speaker 1: maybe not a balanced mixture, but a mixture. Maybe you

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Speaker 1: have more Type one, a little Type two, and a

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Speaker 1: pinch of Type three in your life. That's okay, it

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Speaker 1: doesn't have I don't think it should be. Probably, I

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00:24:08,200 --> 00:24:10,520
Speaker 1: don't think we need as many Type threes as Type ones.

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Speaker 1: But I think a combination of these helps us create

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Speaker 1: the best versions of ourselves, along with giving us a

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00:24:16,960 --> 00:24:20,320
Speaker 1: chance to live the most full lives. And obviously I

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00:24:20,440 --> 00:24:23,040
Speaker 1: enjoy at a baseline and look forward to Type one

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00:24:23,119 --> 00:24:26,119
Speaker 1: fun than most, but it's really Type two fun that

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00:24:26,200 --> 00:24:28,919
Speaker 1: I have the fondest memories of and I tend to

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00:24:28,960 --> 00:24:32,120
Speaker 1: appreciate more often than not. I think Type one fund

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00:24:32,240 --> 00:24:35,000
Speaker 1: also allows me to have the energy and the mental

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00:24:35,000 --> 00:24:38,280
Speaker 1: capacity and the mental strength at times. It's kind of

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Speaker 1: that regenerating fun that allows me to engage and more

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Speaker 1: of the Type two activities. Again, it's not about doing

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00:24:45,200 --> 00:24:47,600
Speaker 1: one of these more than the other. It's about engaging

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Speaker 1: in all of them in order to allow ourselves to

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00:24:50,040 --> 00:24:52,719
Speaker 1: have the best experiences we can have in our lives.

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Speaker 1: So when you think in your head, ugh, that sounds horrible,

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00:24:57,280 --> 00:24:59,760
Speaker 1: I'm not doing it, or I can't understand how anyone

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00:24:59,800 --> 00:25:02,159
Speaker 1: will call that fun. I want you to take a

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00:25:02,200 --> 00:25:06,000
Speaker 1: second and wonder about what makes something fun. Sometimes it's

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00:25:06,000 --> 00:25:09,240
Speaker 1: the present moment of the experience, but sometimes it's what

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00:25:09,320 --> 00:25:12,119
Speaker 1: you get out of the experience that makes it so desirable.

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00:25:12,760 --> 00:25:15,399
Speaker 1: And we need to take that into consideration when we

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Speaker 1: are saying yes and when we are saying no to

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00:25:18,480 --> 00:25:21,960
Speaker 1: opportunities in our lives. So I hope that you enjoyed

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Speaker 1: this fun episode of You Need Therapy Podcast. You can

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00:25:25,600 --> 00:25:29,000
Speaker 1: follow me at Kat dot defoda on Instagram and at

498
00:25:29,040 --> 00:25:32,080
Speaker 1: You Need Therapy Podcast where you'll get all the podcasts info.

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00:25:32,440 --> 00:25:35,160
Speaker 1: You can email me Catherine at You Need Therapy Podcast

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00:25:35,160 --> 00:25:38,040
Speaker 1: if you have any feedback or comments, or if you

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00:25:38,040 --> 00:25:42,000
Speaker 1: have questions that you want me to answer on Wednesday's episode,

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00:25:42,119 --> 00:25:44,720
Speaker 1: which are called couch Talks, which are episodes that I

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00:25:44,760 --> 00:25:46,920
Speaker 1: answer questions that you guys sent in to me, which

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00:25:47,000 --> 00:25:49,040
Speaker 1: you sent in through that email, so you can send

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00:25:49,080 --> 00:25:52,639
Speaker 1: those whenever. I love getting them and until Wednesday. I

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Speaker 1: hope you guys have the fun to day you need

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Speaker 1: to have bott