1 00:00:12,720 --> 00:00:17,360 Speaker 1: Okay, so let's talk about settling. 2 00:00:18,280 --> 00:00:21,360 Speaker 2: I really want to talk about settling in relationships because 3 00:00:22,760 --> 00:00:28,640 Speaker 2: I want to say something so graciously and in a classy, 4 00:00:28,680 --> 00:00:33,479 Speaker 2: respectful manner. Anytime that I've left a relationship where it 5 00:00:33,520 --> 00:00:39,040 Speaker 2: doesn't feel right in my body at that time, I 6 00:00:39,159 --> 00:00:43,000 Speaker 2: later thank myself and it's gone deeper and deeper. Okay. 7 00:00:43,200 --> 00:00:43,760 Speaker 1: So it could be. 8 00:00:43,800 --> 00:00:46,000 Speaker 2: Leaving an engagement, leaving a marriage, it could be a 9 00:00:46,080 --> 00:00:47,720 Speaker 2: number of things. But I just want to tell you 10 00:00:48,520 --> 00:00:52,800 Speaker 2: that recently I've been saying to myself, I am so 11 00:00:53,159 --> 00:00:57,800 Speaker 2: grateful for having the courage to walk away from things 12 00:00:57,840 --> 00:01:00,600 Speaker 2: that don't work for me. So that could be work, 13 00:01:01,480 --> 00:01:05,520 Speaker 2: That could be friendships. That could be business deals that 14 00:01:05,640 --> 00:01:10,399 Speaker 2: just crush your soul. That could be confronting a boss 15 00:01:10,480 --> 00:01:12,560 Speaker 2: or not accepting less than what you deserve. That could 16 00:01:12,560 --> 00:01:15,679 Speaker 2: be a relationship where you're just like I am doing 17 00:01:15,959 --> 00:01:19,440 Speaker 2: it's good. It could be very good. Now if it's bad, 18 00:01:19,560 --> 00:01:21,720 Speaker 2: that's not even a discussion. But it could be good 19 00:01:21,800 --> 00:01:24,040 Speaker 2: to very good. But if it doesn't fit feel right 20 00:01:24,040 --> 00:01:25,800 Speaker 2: in your body, you know, when you eat something it 21 00:01:25,840 --> 00:01:28,120 Speaker 2: doesn't agree with you. You may not get violently ill, but 22 00:01:28,160 --> 00:01:31,200 Speaker 2: it doesn't agree with you or you're constantly thinking about it, 23 00:01:31,720 --> 00:01:33,399 Speaker 2: you know, when you're fidgeting in an outfit or it 24 00:01:33,480 --> 00:01:35,040 Speaker 2: just like you don't love it, so you don't live 25 00:01:35,080 --> 00:01:36,600 Speaker 2: for it. Put it the fuck down, take it off 26 00:01:36,640 --> 00:01:38,200 Speaker 2: if you don't. If you're not, like you have to 27 00:01:38,200 --> 00:01:40,960 Speaker 2: like convince yourself and people around you. You know, when 28 00:01:41,000 --> 00:01:43,840 Speaker 2: you put something on you like this is it game 29 00:01:43,880 --> 00:01:48,320 Speaker 2: over story in film at eleven. That's what a relationship 30 00:01:48,320 --> 00:01:50,600 Speaker 2: should be like. And if you're not feeling that now, 31 00:01:50,600 --> 00:01:52,000 Speaker 2: it doesn't mean that you're not going to go through 32 00:01:52,040 --> 00:01:54,320 Speaker 2: issues and work through things, but like it has to 33 00:01:54,400 --> 00:01:55,200 Speaker 2: be coming out. 34 00:01:55,080 --> 00:01:55,680 Speaker 1: Of your pores. 35 00:01:55,720 --> 00:01:57,960 Speaker 2: How right a relationship is for you. You have to 36 00:01:58,120 --> 00:02:01,600 Speaker 2: know from the depths of your being if a relationship 37 00:02:01,640 --> 00:02:04,120 Speaker 2: is right for you, and if it's not, you cannot 38 00:02:04,160 --> 00:02:07,880 Speaker 2: stay because of fear your age, you're too old, you're 39 00:02:07,880 --> 00:02:10,000 Speaker 2: never gonna meet someone, or this person was so great, 40 00:02:10,120 --> 00:02:11,800 Speaker 2: or they treat you so well, or they're rich or 41 00:02:11,800 --> 00:02:13,960 Speaker 2: they're generous, or they're a doctor, or your parents like them, 42 00:02:14,040 --> 00:02:16,360 Speaker 2: or your friends like them, or they fit in, or 43 00:02:16,639 --> 00:02:18,320 Speaker 2: your kids are still home and they're not off at 44 00:02:18,400 --> 00:02:20,600 Speaker 2: college yet, or you have a good friend group and 45 00:02:20,680 --> 00:02:21,360 Speaker 2: it's going to break up. 46 00:02:21,360 --> 00:02:21,839 Speaker 1: The friend group. 47 00:02:21,960 --> 00:02:25,000 Speaker 2: All of these things do not matter. Okay if you 48 00:02:25,200 --> 00:02:29,080 Speaker 2: don't know, yes, it's no, because this is the most 49 00:02:29,080 --> 00:02:33,280 Speaker 2: important part of this. Once you jump, you fly, and 50 00:02:33,360 --> 00:02:35,680 Speaker 2: then you find what you really need. And if you 51 00:02:35,760 --> 00:02:37,959 Speaker 2: are stuck in the wrong thing, you're never gonna find 52 00:02:37,960 --> 00:02:39,480 Speaker 2: the right thing. And not until you find the right 53 00:02:39,520 --> 00:02:41,519 Speaker 2: thing or you're going to say, oh my god, thank 54 00:02:41,520 --> 00:02:43,400 Speaker 2: you so much for having the courage to walk out 55 00:02:43,440 --> 00:02:46,280 Speaker 2: of something that it's harder to walk out of something 56 00:02:46,360 --> 00:02:50,080 Speaker 2: that's like very good because you're almost there. But we 57 00:02:50,160 --> 00:02:53,440 Speaker 2: are winners. We go all the way. We take that 58 00:02:53,480 --> 00:02:55,760 Speaker 2: ball into the end zone. We don't eat average food 59 00:02:56,080 --> 00:02:59,120 Speaker 2: mid we don't go on mid vacations. I'd rather stay 60 00:02:59,120 --> 00:03:01,880 Speaker 2: home and go on a mid or shitty vacation. I'd 61 00:03:01,960 --> 00:03:04,280 Speaker 2: rather stay home than stay in a shitty room. I 62 00:03:04,280 --> 00:03:06,240 Speaker 2: don't want to go somewhere and feel grosser than I 63 00:03:06,240 --> 00:03:08,280 Speaker 2: do at home, Like I want to go somewhere and 64 00:03:08,280 --> 00:03:10,120 Speaker 2: be elevated. I don't want to eat out if it's 65 00:03:10,120 --> 00:03:11,520 Speaker 2: not gonna be better than what I could look at home. 66 00:03:11,560 --> 00:03:12,960 Speaker 2: I don't want that. I don't need to go to 67 00:03:12,960 --> 00:03:15,760 Speaker 2: a hip restaurant with shift food. Do it or don't. 68 00:03:16,080 --> 00:03:18,519 Speaker 2: That's part of what I was saying about my Halloween costume, 69 00:03:18,880 --> 00:03:21,000 Speaker 2: you know, like do it or don't you going to Halloween. 70 00:03:21,080 --> 00:03:22,320 Speaker 1: Let's go to the Hidi Gloon party. 71 00:03:22,360 --> 00:03:24,560 Speaker 2: Let's do it, let's get dressed, let's turn it out, 72 00:03:25,040 --> 00:03:27,760 Speaker 2: let's have fun, and let's go home. Like that's it. 73 00:03:27,840 --> 00:03:29,840 Speaker 2: I don't want to do medium. I don't want mediocre. 74 00:03:29,960 --> 00:03:33,639 Speaker 2: I don't want mid in any category. Not food, not sex, 75 00:03:33,760 --> 00:03:38,800 Speaker 2: not man, not woman, not friend, not job, not travel, 76 00:03:38,960 --> 00:03:43,840 Speaker 2: not experience, not staff, not team around you. We do 77 00:03:44,000 --> 00:03:47,920 Speaker 2: all stars, we do Hall of Fame. We're not like 78 00:03:48,080 --> 00:03:50,320 Speaker 2: that tipsy demere trend. It's like we're not like the 79 00:03:50,320 --> 00:03:53,640 Speaker 2: other girlies. We don't do average. We don't do mid. 80 00:03:54,120 --> 00:03:57,280 Speaker 1: We do elite. We do do it or don't and 81 00:03:57,440 --> 00:03:59,080 Speaker 1: do it well or don't do it at all. 82 00:03:59,400 --> 00:04:08,320 Speaker 2: So that's something that I think is really important in relationships. 83 00:04:17,440 --> 00:04:20,360 Speaker 2: I think we tend to self sabotage in relationships when 84 00:04:20,400 --> 00:04:22,680 Speaker 2: we're really happier, when it's going really well, when we 85 00:04:22,720 --> 00:04:25,359 Speaker 2: get scared. If you ever started dating someone and you 86 00:04:25,440 --> 00:04:27,360 Speaker 2: like them so much that you have anxiety because you're 87 00:04:27,400 --> 00:04:30,480 Speaker 2: like over your skis and you're like having anxiety, you're 88 00:04:30,520 --> 00:04:33,200 Speaker 2: sabotaging that is a dangerous place to be, and that's 89 00:04:33,200 --> 00:04:35,599 Speaker 2: a place when you have to calm down. Take several 90 00:04:35,640 --> 00:04:38,799 Speaker 2: deep breaths. Do not text anything, Do not email anything. 91 00:04:39,160 --> 00:04:42,080 Speaker 2: Write an email to yourself or to the person and 92 00:04:42,120 --> 00:04:44,280 Speaker 2: put it in drafts and just save it. 93 00:04:45,000 --> 00:04:45,680 Speaker 1: Do not send. 94 00:04:45,720 --> 00:04:49,400 Speaker 2: You need to wait six hours before sending because we 95 00:04:49,600 --> 00:04:53,360 Speaker 2: tend to get anxiety and want to blow things up 96 00:04:53,360 --> 00:04:56,120 Speaker 2: because they're too good. Especially if you grow up in 97 00:04:56,160 --> 00:04:59,560 Speaker 2: a fucked up house, especially if you're used to chaos 98 00:05:00,120 --> 00:05:02,359 Speaker 2: us is your norm, it's going to be very hard 99 00:05:02,440 --> 00:05:05,960 Speaker 2: for you to have peace and be happy. There also 100 00:05:06,040 --> 00:05:09,520 Speaker 2: will be situations where you are incapable of being loved. 101 00:05:10,000 --> 00:05:14,360 Speaker 2: You are not porous, you are not open, you're not available, 102 00:05:14,960 --> 00:05:17,640 Speaker 2: and that's a hard thing to access. And also trust yourself, 103 00:05:17,640 --> 00:05:21,680 Speaker 2: because if you're not open and porous and accessible, it 104 00:05:21,720 --> 00:05:23,919 Speaker 2: may be because you're with the wrong person. With the 105 00:05:24,040 --> 00:05:26,919 Speaker 2: right person, you will want to open up with the 106 00:05:27,000 --> 00:05:29,359 Speaker 2: right person. You will want to check yourself because you 107 00:05:29,360 --> 00:05:32,200 Speaker 2: will want to do the work because it's so worth it, 108 00:05:32,240 --> 00:05:34,880 Speaker 2: because the stakes are so high. Like if you meet 109 00:05:34,920 --> 00:05:38,200 Speaker 2: someone that's incredible and you know they are so well 110 00:05:38,240 --> 00:05:41,039 Speaker 2: matched to you and you are so compatible, that's when 111 00:05:41,080 --> 00:05:43,040 Speaker 2: you really have to pull your shit together, and that's 112 00:05:43,040 --> 00:05:45,200 Speaker 2: when you have to check yourself. And that's like when 113 00:05:45,240 --> 00:05:48,679 Speaker 2: you're going to the Olympics, you're preparing for the big race, 114 00:05:48,839 --> 00:05:52,679 Speaker 2: you're preparing for you know, your college entry exams or whatever. 115 00:05:52,720 --> 00:05:55,440 Speaker 2: The most important thing is you are not fucking around. 116 00:05:55,480 --> 00:05:58,560 Speaker 2: You're not making mistakes. You're not you know, getting drunk 117 00:05:58,600 --> 00:06:02,560 Speaker 2: and doing drunk dialing or just like you know, self 118 00:06:02,600 --> 00:06:04,960 Speaker 2: destructing and doing stupid things and saying things. 119 00:06:04,960 --> 00:06:06,919 Speaker 1: You're gonna check yourself before you wreck yourself. 120 00:06:07,279 --> 00:06:09,640 Speaker 2: When you see that something is really good for you 121 00:06:10,080 --> 00:06:13,119 Speaker 2: and could really like change your life, you're not going 122 00:06:13,160 --> 00:06:18,359 Speaker 2: to fuck it up. You are going to collect, get organized, 123 00:06:18,440 --> 00:06:23,160 Speaker 2: be intentional, and do the work. So if something usually 124 00:06:23,160 --> 00:06:25,560 Speaker 2: when something's really good and people are really connected and 125 00:06:25,600 --> 00:06:27,880 Speaker 2: everything's great, that's when they wouldn't do therapy. That's when 126 00:06:27,920 --> 00:06:30,200 Speaker 2: they think they've got it going good. But everything has 127 00:06:30,200 --> 00:06:33,600 Speaker 2: the new car smell and little cracks become craters. And 128 00:06:33,760 --> 00:06:36,400 Speaker 2: when the car has the new car smell, that's when 129 00:06:36,440 --> 00:06:37,840 Speaker 2: you start doing the work. That's when you get the 130 00:06:37,880 --> 00:06:40,279 Speaker 2: self help book. That's when you talk to your partner 131 00:06:40,320 --> 00:06:42,960 Speaker 2: about self help. That's when you check in with your partner. 132 00:06:43,279 --> 00:06:46,360 Speaker 2: That's when you do therapy on yourself and eventually hopefully 133 00:06:46,400 --> 00:06:51,000 Speaker 2: with them. I am not above if I'm really into someone. 134 00:06:51,279 --> 00:06:54,880 Speaker 2: I'm not above early on, if they're on the same page, 135 00:06:55,040 --> 00:06:57,400 Speaker 2: once every couple of months talking to a therapist or 136 00:06:57,400 --> 00:06:59,640 Speaker 2: once a month, because you want to lock the door 137 00:06:59,680 --> 00:07:02,880 Speaker 2: before you get robbed. And there could be different dynamics. 138 00:07:03,080 --> 00:07:05,520 Speaker 2: If you're an adult and you have kids and you're blending, 139 00:07:06,000 --> 00:07:07,920 Speaker 2: that would be a situation where you might want to 140 00:07:07,920 --> 00:07:11,360 Speaker 2: get a professional involved, okay, because that's something that takes 141 00:07:12,040 --> 00:07:14,640 Speaker 2: you know, finessing, and you don't want to do damage 142 00:07:14,640 --> 00:07:17,360 Speaker 2: in the beginning that you can undo. Or if you're 143 00:07:17,360 --> 00:07:20,040 Speaker 2: in a long distance relationship, let's say, and there's certain 144 00:07:20,320 --> 00:07:22,560 Speaker 2: you get in your head and there's a certain you know, 145 00:07:22,600 --> 00:07:24,480 Speaker 2: there are certain tools and a skill set you need 146 00:07:24,520 --> 00:07:27,960 Speaker 2: to navigate. That's a time when you would be proactive 147 00:07:28,040 --> 00:07:33,040 Speaker 2: and intentional. So I think it's important to make an 148 00:07:33,080 --> 00:07:35,680 Speaker 2: effort and be intentional when the stakes are high, and 149 00:07:35,720 --> 00:07:38,320 Speaker 2: you know when they're high, when you're like, wow, this 150 00:07:38,360 --> 00:07:41,640 Speaker 2: could really be it. And I know myself and I 151 00:07:41,680 --> 00:07:43,840 Speaker 2: know my tendencies, and I know my habits, and I 152 00:07:43,920 --> 00:07:47,600 Speaker 2: know my ways and I know that history repeats itself, 153 00:07:47,640 --> 00:07:50,280 Speaker 2: and I know that I start to get anxious attachment 154 00:07:51,120 --> 00:07:54,160 Speaker 2: to someone. I start to get anxiety. I start to 155 00:07:54,160 --> 00:07:56,320 Speaker 2: get in my head. I make up scenarios, I start 156 00:07:56,360 --> 00:07:59,440 Speaker 2: to obsess, I start to fixate. I start to get 157 00:07:59,440 --> 00:08:03,000 Speaker 2: overly knee, I start to get overly distant. I start 158 00:08:03,000 --> 00:08:04,920 Speaker 2: to want to make the other person jealous. I start 159 00:08:04,920 --> 00:08:07,640 Speaker 2: to like when they're jealous. I start to be jealous. 160 00:08:07,840 --> 00:08:10,560 Speaker 2: Whatever your noise is, you have it, and you keep 161 00:08:10,600 --> 00:08:12,320 Speaker 2: doing it over and over. And when you first get 162 00:08:12,360 --> 00:08:14,480 Speaker 2: in the relationship, you don't think you're going to do 163 00:08:14,560 --> 00:08:16,559 Speaker 2: it over and over because it's got the new car smell. 164 00:08:16,840 --> 00:08:19,240 Speaker 2: And then all of a sudden, one day you hit 165 00:08:19,280 --> 00:08:21,400 Speaker 2: a brick wall and you go back to your ways, 166 00:08:21,440 --> 00:08:24,040 Speaker 2: and you convince yourself, and you call your friends and 167 00:08:24,040 --> 00:08:26,640 Speaker 2: your crowdsource because you want all your friends to validate 168 00:08:26,960 --> 00:08:30,440 Speaker 2: and reinforce what you're saying, which is a terrible idea. 169 00:08:30,600 --> 00:08:34,120 Speaker 2: Do not go taking advice from your friends. Take advice 170 00:08:34,160 --> 00:08:37,520 Speaker 2: from professionals. Or you could have a certain friend or 171 00:08:37,559 --> 00:08:41,000 Speaker 2: a colleague or someone that you already know has excellent judgment. 172 00:08:41,600 --> 00:08:44,000 Speaker 2: Doesn't always tell you what you want to hear. Is 173 00:08:44,080 --> 00:08:46,200 Speaker 2: going to tell you the unpopular thing is going to 174 00:08:46,240 --> 00:08:49,800 Speaker 2: be like your local affordable therapist. That's a different model, 175 00:08:50,080 --> 00:08:51,720 Speaker 2: but it's not your friend that every day you just 176 00:08:51,720 --> 00:08:53,680 Speaker 2: call it a complaint and they validate everything you say, 177 00:08:54,240 --> 00:08:56,080 Speaker 2: and they just don't They just want to make you 178 00:08:56,080 --> 00:08:58,920 Speaker 2: feel good, or they just like are someone that allows 179 00:08:58,960 --> 00:09:02,720 Speaker 2: you to hear yourself talk, don't do that. There's a 180 00:09:02,760 --> 00:09:05,800 Speaker 2: lot to navigate, and as we get older, there are 181 00:09:05,920 --> 00:09:21,839 Speaker 2: so many dynamics. So I have a dating theory and 182 00:09:22,280 --> 00:09:24,240 Speaker 2: a relation to theory and a marriage theory, and it 183 00:09:24,320 --> 00:09:25,360 Speaker 2: might help frame things. 184 00:09:25,679 --> 00:09:26,440 Speaker 1: I think that in. 185 00:09:26,360 --> 00:09:29,559 Speaker 2: Partnerships, one partner is a rescue dog. Well, no, that's 186 00:09:29,600 --> 00:09:31,920 Speaker 2: not true. You can have two rescue dogs together. You 187 00:09:31,960 --> 00:09:34,360 Speaker 2: can have two breeder dogs together. But I think that 188 00:09:34,760 --> 00:09:37,120 Speaker 2: people are either a breeder dog or a rescue dog. 189 00:09:37,360 --> 00:09:40,720 Speaker 2: You either grew up in the Drew Barrymore School of parenting, 190 00:09:40,760 --> 00:09:42,920 Speaker 2: which is an extreme, don't get me wrong. And I 191 00:09:43,000 --> 00:09:45,320 Speaker 2: grew up I went to the Drew Barrymore School of Childhood, 192 00:09:45,800 --> 00:09:48,079 Speaker 2: and or you were like in a family that was together, 193 00:09:48,480 --> 00:09:50,520 Speaker 2: and of course every family has its issues. But like 194 00:09:50,559 --> 00:09:54,440 Speaker 2: you have a safe, secure attachment program, you believe that 195 00:09:54,480 --> 00:09:57,400 Speaker 2: people can have a good relationship. You've witnessed good relationships, 196 00:09:57,760 --> 00:10:01,880 Speaker 2: you have some foundation, you are not a mess, and 197 00:10:01,920 --> 00:10:06,440 Speaker 2: you don't like you've seen normal constructs that other people 198 00:10:06,720 --> 00:10:09,400 Speaker 2: have never even witnessed, like for me, seeing like a 199 00:10:09,440 --> 00:10:14,600 Speaker 2: normal relationship in a family environment, a stable relationship, non drama, 200 00:10:14,800 --> 00:10:21,040 Speaker 2: non drugs, non abuse, non alcohol, non psychological abuse, non gambling, 201 00:10:21,320 --> 00:10:25,760 Speaker 2: you know, non underage going to night clubs like just 202 00:10:25,960 --> 00:10:29,040 Speaker 2: I've seen action. I've seen just debauchery. And so for me, 203 00:10:29,800 --> 00:10:32,880 Speaker 2: chaos was the norm. Action was the norm. So being 204 00:10:32,920 --> 00:10:35,559 Speaker 2: in something stable and peaceful, or seeing someone or being 205 00:10:35,640 --> 00:10:38,520 Speaker 2: with someone who's normal and stable and peaceful is strange. 206 00:10:38,559 --> 00:10:43,560 Speaker 2: It's an alien concept. It's like putting something strange into 207 00:10:43,559 --> 00:10:47,400 Speaker 2: your bloodstream that it doesn't that it rejects. So I'm 208 00:10:47,440 --> 00:10:50,040 Speaker 2: like a rescue dog because someone could do something that 209 00:10:50,080 --> 00:10:52,360 Speaker 2: would be normal, and I would see it as a 210 00:10:52,360 --> 00:10:54,880 Speaker 2: fight or flight. I would see it as trauma. Someone 211 00:10:54,920 --> 00:10:56,760 Speaker 2: could not text you back for thirty minutes, and I 212 00:10:56,800 --> 00:10:59,000 Speaker 2: could think the world's coming to an end, where someone 213 00:10:59,000 --> 00:11:01,920 Speaker 2: else would have a normal rational thought that like someone 214 00:11:02,000 --> 00:11:04,760 Speaker 2: might be in, you know, in an appointment, and that's 215 00:11:04,760 --> 00:11:07,160 Speaker 2: just a dumb example. But breeder dogs walk in with 216 00:11:07,240 --> 00:11:12,560 Speaker 2: secure attachment history. They've seen good relationships. They know that 217 00:11:12,600 --> 00:11:15,080 Speaker 2: it's possible. It's not like an island that they see 218 00:11:15,080 --> 00:11:17,120 Speaker 2: that they have no idea how to swim to. They 219 00:11:17,160 --> 00:11:19,120 Speaker 2: have faith in the process. They think they could be 220 00:11:19,120 --> 00:11:21,480 Speaker 2: in love. They know how to treat someone nicely. They 221 00:11:21,559 --> 00:11:24,160 Speaker 2: don't need for there to be action and drama and 222 00:11:24,200 --> 00:11:28,880 Speaker 2: a problem all the time. They aren't deeply anxiety ridden 223 00:11:28,880 --> 00:11:31,040 Speaker 2: in insecure. They could be insecure. They could be jealous, 224 00:11:31,080 --> 00:11:33,560 Speaker 2: but they might not have the same issues and noise. 225 00:11:34,080 --> 00:11:36,480 Speaker 2: And the thing is, if someone identifies what they are 226 00:11:36,559 --> 00:11:38,240 Speaker 2: and shares it with the other person, it can help 227 00:11:38,240 --> 00:11:41,240 Speaker 2: in the relationship because you know when someone's doing something 228 00:11:41,240 --> 00:11:43,440 Speaker 2: it has nothing to do with you. If a breeder 229 00:11:43,480 --> 00:11:46,360 Speaker 2: dog starts shaking like I have a special needs dog smalls, 230 00:11:46,600 --> 00:11:49,319 Speaker 2: he shakes for no reason. He's a rescue. His mom 231 00:11:49,400 --> 00:11:51,680 Speaker 2: is going to be euthanized. He shakes for no reason. 232 00:11:51,760 --> 00:11:54,480 Speaker 2: He's a disaster. He's a mess. He has five nervous 233 00:11:54,480 --> 00:11:57,280 Speaker 2: breakdowns a day. He's scared of water, his own shadow. 234 00:11:57,280 --> 00:11:59,280 Speaker 2: He'll have two nervous breakdowns a day to start shaking 235 00:11:59,280 --> 00:12:03,480 Speaker 2: and panicking. Things happened like he's a fucking wreck. Okay, 236 00:12:03,760 --> 00:12:05,640 Speaker 2: Biggie is just like super well adjusted. 237 00:12:05,640 --> 00:12:06,679 Speaker 1: I could bring him on a plane. 238 00:12:06,760 --> 00:12:09,480 Speaker 2: Small's tongue comes out like one of those frogs that 239 00:12:09,559 --> 00:12:12,480 Speaker 2: has like that tongue that comes out to like get flies. I'm, 240 00:12:12,800 --> 00:12:15,400 Speaker 2: you know, not a mess, but like normal. I tell 241 00:12:15,440 --> 00:12:18,520 Speaker 2: people I'm a squirrel. I don't trust. So you come 242 00:12:18,559 --> 00:12:19,959 Speaker 2: near me and maybe I'll come with you to get 243 00:12:20,000 --> 00:12:21,200 Speaker 2: like some of the food. But you make a little 244 00:12:21,200 --> 00:12:24,040 Speaker 2: weird move. I'm running up that fucking tree. So like 245 00:12:24,160 --> 00:12:26,320 Speaker 2: I'm like a rescue dog. You cannot explain why a 246 00:12:26,360 --> 00:12:28,400 Speaker 2: rescue dog you come near them and they shake and 247 00:12:28,440 --> 00:12:30,240 Speaker 2: they run away, or why they won't let you put 248 00:12:30,240 --> 00:12:31,440 Speaker 2: a leash on her, or they won't let you give 249 00:12:31,520 --> 00:12:33,400 Speaker 2: him a bath, or some weird thing triggers down like 250 00:12:33,440 --> 00:12:34,319 Speaker 2: a treat or something. 251 00:12:34,559 --> 00:12:35,079 Speaker 1: You don't know. 252 00:12:35,160 --> 00:12:38,080 Speaker 2: They're a rescue dog. They've been fucked up. They have 253 00:12:38,120 --> 00:12:40,920 Speaker 2: a fucked up child, a a fucked up past. Someone 254 00:12:40,960 --> 00:12:44,439 Speaker 2: abused them. Someone asks who hurts you? I'm like, where 255 00:12:44,520 --> 00:12:46,199 Speaker 2: do you want? Where do I sign up for? 256 00:12:46,280 --> 00:12:48,600 Speaker 1: Telling you? You want the list who hurt me? Who 257 00:12:48,600 --> 00:12:49,240 Speaker 1: didn't hurt me. 258 00:12:50,559 --> 00:12:52,079 Speaker 2: I've seen my mother get the shit beaten out of 259 00:12:52,080 --> 00:12:54,520 Speaker 2: her with a phone I've seen people do drugs. I've 260 00:12:54,559 --> 00:12:56,440 Speaker 2: had my mother get beaten up and then heard sex 261 00:12:56,480 --> 00:12:57,360 Speaker 2: fifteen minutes later. 262 00:12:57,720 --> 00:12:58,360 Speaker 1: Crazy shit. 263 00:12:58,400 --> 00:13:00,880 Speaker 2: I've been to nightclub since I was thirteen years doing drugs, 264 00:13:00,920 --> 00:13:03,160 Speaker 2: doing everything that's wrong, everything that your kid is not 265 00:13:03,200 --> 00:13:05,400 Speaker 2: supposed to be doing. Taking the train into New York 266 00:13:05,440 --> 00:13:09,520 Speaker 2: City at fourteen years old, getting myself to fourteenth Street, 267 00:13:09,559 --> 00:13:12,240 Speaker 2: to the Palladium, to Area to the tunnel to save 268 00:13:12,280 --> 00:13:15,080 Speaker 2: the robot. Like, none of this is normal. I have 269 00:13:15,120 --> 00:13:17,760 Speaker 2: a fourteen year old in my house, Like what, So 270 00:13:17,800 --> 00:13:20,520 Speaker 2: the thing is, I'm a fucking rescue dog. So to 271 00:13:20,600 --> 00:13:23,160 Speaker 2: communicate with a partner. If I'm in a relationship with 272 00:13:23,200 --> 00:13:25,400 Speaker 2: a breeder dog, I have to let the breeder dog 273 00:13:25,520 --> 00:13:29,880 Speaker 2: know I don't act like a normal person. So understand 274 00:13:29,920 --> 00:13:32,839 Speaker 2: that one of us is going to have to be sane. 275 00:13:33,080 --> 00:13:34,839 Speaker 2: One of us has to be the rock. I'm not 276 00:13:34,960 --> 00:13:39,359 Speaker 2: the rock. I'm the fucking peacock. I'm the star. I'm entertaining, 277 00:13:39,440 --> 00:13:42,080 Speaker 2: I'm hilarious, I'm loyal, I'll be good to you, I'll 278 00:13:42,120 --> 00:13:44,360 Speaker 2: do everything for you. I am the most fun person 279 00:13:44,440 --> 00:13:46,880 Speaker 2: you've ever met. No two days will ever be the same. 280 00:13:47,200 --> 00:13:50,280 Speaker 2: You will have a life of laughter and excitement and 281 00:13:50,400 --> 00:13:54,040 Speaker 2: adventure and joy and fucking ride or die, and loyalty 282 00:13:54,080 --> 00:13:56,319 Speaker 2: and hard work, and you will learn things you never learn. 283 00:13:56,600 --> 00:13:59,520 Speaker 2: No one's ever been more efficient, I don't. No one's 284 00:13:59,559 --> 00:14:02,840 Speaker 2: ever been more like. I am highly functional, I am 285 00:14:02,880 --> 00:14:05,520 Speaker 2: super organized. I can get ten things done. 286 00:14:05,280 --> 00:14:05,880 Speaker 1: To your one. 287 00:14:05,960 --> 00:14:08,840 Speaker 2: I will always be ahead of you, smarter, faster, quicker. 288 00:14:09,160 --> 00:14:11,960 Speaker 2: But I'm a fucking disaster. So you need to know 289 00:14:12,080 --> 00:14:15,400 Speaker 2: that you're gonna have to be the rational saying rock here. 290 00:14:15,800 --> 00:14:17,760 Speaker 2: So do you want that job or don't you? And 291 00:14:17,960 --> 00:14:20,680 Speaker 2: also you have to be interesting, because you can't be 292 00:14:20,720 --> 00:14:23,400 Speaker 2: a fucking boring doormat. That's gonna be the rock. You 293 00:14:23,440 --> 00:14:27,400 Speaker 2: have to be fun and ready to go. So know 294 00:14:27,520 --> 00:14:30,280 Speaker 2: if you're the rescue dog or the breeder dog, communicate 295 00:14:30,400 --> 00:14:33,000 Speaker 2: about it. And two rescue dogs can be together, and 296 00:14:33,040 --> 00:14:35,160 Speaker 2: a rescue dog and a breeder dog can be together. 297 00:14:35,200 --> 00:14:39,000 Speaker 2: But you just have to communicate. It's an important thing. 298 00:14:39,040 --> 00:14:41,840 Speaker 2: And you know who you are. Maybe you're right down 299 00:14:41,880 --> 00:14:43,800 Speaker 2: the middle, Maybe you're a part maybe you're a mixed breed, 300 00:14:43,840 --> 00:14:45,920 Speaker 2: you're part rescue, part reader. I don't think you can 301 00:14:45,920 --> 00:14:48,320 Speaker 2: be part bader, part rescue, but I once did get 302 00:14:48,360 --> 00:14:52,600 Speaker 2: a dog from it. Was like a rescue dog, but 303 00:14:52,680 --> 00:14:55,400 Speaker 2: I got it from like a rescue dog store, so 304 00:14:55,560 --> 00:14:58,400 Speaker 2: it was like safe, but it wasn't a purebred, so 305 00:14:58,600 --> 00:15:20,560 Speaker 2: you decide for yourself. You are welcome, have a great day.