00:00:08 Speaker 1: Well, I invited you here. I thought I made myself perfectly clear. When you're a guest in my home, you gotta come to me empty. And I said, no, guests, your presences presents enough. I already had too much stuff. 00:00:35 Speaker 2: So how do you dare to surbey me? 00:00:46 Speaker 3: Welcome to I said, no gifts. I'm Richard Wineger. Welcome to the podcast. I wonder what you're doing. If you're I don't know, if you're listening to this podcast while you're working parking enforcement, maybe take a minute to just cut some people up. Break. I was just out and I didn't feed the meter. I just had to run to the car, and I was so anxious, So, you know, maybe just don't be a nark for thirty seconds of your life. Give everybody a minute to just breathe at the meter. And on the other side, if you're listening to this, well, considering an illegal parking job, I don't know, maybe circle the block a couple of times and look for something that's a little more doable. I don't know. Welcome to the podcast. I'm so happy everyone's here, and I'm so happy about today's guest. Everybody loves her. We're so excited to talk to her. It's Lisa trag or Liza. 00:01:45 Speaker 2: I don't know if everybody loves me enough. 00:01:48 Speaker 3: People love me, but enough to assume everybody. 00:01:51 Speaker 2: Yeah, but I got there's some enemies around town. 00:01:55 Speaker 3: Start naming enemies. We've got an hour. Just get out your list, unfurl the scroll, and begin naming enemies. 00:02:04 Speaker 2: Sometimes I get confrontational. I'm trying to work on it. Do you watch below deck? 00:02:09 Speaker 3: No, I've had it recommended to me so many times, and I'm certain I would love it. 00:02:13 Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah, upstairs, downstairs, you know, hot people hooking up an a lyast heard this already, but there's like one girl came for this other girl and was like, you're the worst, chief stew you suck it. That like went for her and the other g went okay, and it drove this bitch wild, and I was like, that's what I want to do from now on. 00:02:33 Speaker 3: I want to be a kay just not giving anybody anything that they want. 00:02:38 Speaker 2: Because I get too emotional about everything, and I want to be like, doesn't matter. 00:02:43 Speaker 3: Okay, So that's wonderful, and that really is the absolute defense. The other person will lose their mind because they want you to Also be on their level of hysteria. 00:02:55 Speaker 2: Well, recently I got into a fight with a friend and she was like, you're being really defensive. Oh, I'm really defensive. I go out, Oh, yeah, you just said something shitty and I'm defent. What are you talking? Of course? 00:03:08 Speaker 3: Do you feel like you're getting in fights like daily, weekly? How often are you confronting someone? 00:03:13 Speaker 2: Oh? I would say weekly, but sometimes it's not that important. Like someone was kind of yelling at a server and I went, don't yell at her. 00:03:23 Speaker 3: Oh that's that's a very heroic cause. 00:03:26 Speaker 2: That's a conference and that's what he did. My favorite thing when then after you say it, they go, I wasn't yelling. I wasn't yelling. But their voice changes. 00:03:35 Speaker 3: Just immediately proving yeah, but that is not their regular volume of voice. He's confrontational, he's not. He is confrontational, but he's loud. So it does seem like he's frequently confronting or like trying to cause some sort of situation. But it's just the level of volume of his voice. His mom, I think as a kid, would say things like I'm not mad, this is just my voice, you know, And it's just a loud. Family and so you're always wondering is this person yelling at me or are they just speaking? 00:04:08 Speaker 2: How long have you been together six and a half years? Is he Russian or no? 00:04:12 Speaker 3: He's a half Italian half Slovak. Mm hmm, so he's loud from New Jersey. But then when when I'm angry, he'll say stop yelling, and I'll be like, I'm not yet, I think anything, because I speak at kind of a level volume at all times. The moment that it goes to any other level, it feels like yelling to people, They're like, wow, he's excited. 00:04:36 Speaker 2: I grew up in a yelling family. So when people are like I won't be spoken to like this, It's like, all right, tome police, that's not what like we I hate that kind of the v like of how you say it matters more than what is actually happening. 00:04:52 Speaker 3: Right, Yeah, it's a hard thing to adjust to. I think anyone that comes from you know, basically the middle of the country free is used to everyone talking in a very pleasant way. So you get onto a coast and you meet people who, uh speak at different volumes, and you just feel like everyone's mad at you. But people are or if anyone's even just honest about their opinion. You're like, I can't believe that someone's sharing their feelings. 00:05:16 Speaker 2: Yeah, it's just like the hardest thing to do in the world, but it also would solve every problem ever. 00:05:23 Speaker 3: Oh, healthy communication, I mean speaking of let's just be honest. I realized I wasn't following you, following you on Instagram today, so I went over. 00:05:33 Speaker 2: The same trash you're posting trash, which is annoying. 00:05:36 Speaker 3: Look that is not annoying. That is I okay, I am following you know, but because I wanted to well, you know, this isn't This is not a not a follow me back situation. I just wanted you to be aware that where I'm getting this information from. I noticed you were in New York recently. How long were you there for? 00:05:55 Speaker 2: I was only there for like a week. 00:05:58 Speaker 3: This was just a were you're doing shows? What are you doing? 00:06:00 Speaker 2: No? I did two weeks in Chicago, and then I went to New York to celebrate my birthday, see my best friend perform at the Comedy Cellar, and just do Labor Day weekend lunches, walking around, laying in bed watching below Deck with my best tie. 00:06:13 Speaker 3: Oh that sounds incredible and it looked like you had a lot of wonderful food. 00:06:16 Speaker 2: Dat wonderful food got stuck in a hurricane. Someone gave me mushrooms. I thought it was inedible. I had a lot. 00:06:26 Speaker 3: Did you do mushrooms while you were there? 00:06:29 Speaker 2: Not on purpose? 00:06:30 Speaker 3: What was then? What was the experience? 00:06:32 Speaker 1: Like? 00:06:33 Speaker 2: I tried to make it as positive as possible. It could have been way worse. I could have thought there was like a bugs crawling all over me, but I didn't know what was happening to me in the car I left and I was like, fuck, I don't feel good. I didn't have energy. And then I laid down on the couch and I went, I'm on mushrooms, so I tested them angry and then I was trying to pew and it felt like it was fifteen hours, but it was just like three four hours of just not my favorite but not the worst. And then I just listened to Chromatica and Joanne and. 00:07:05 Speaker 3: Are you a big Gaga person? 00:07:07 Speaker 2: Yeah? I have a Gaga shower curtain, but I'm But you know when you say like you love someone and them, you meet the people that are like every album I know the name, I know this and I'm not like I but I yes, I'm Miley's my number one, but Gaga is very impar my last. 00:07:20 Speaker 3: Thing Miley, and Miley to me seems like somebody that would be hard to be a hardcore fan of because she seems so all over the place musically. 00:07:30 Speaker 2: Yeah, but I love all the hits and I just I want to hear her voice, so as long as she's singing, I'm down on all her journeys. Who's your number one? 00:07:42 Speaker 3: Look, I'm not super into this sort of this type of pop music, but when I like, when I'm really craving it, I'll listen to a Charlie XCX. Obviously, Robin is next level, Like I put her in another category. 00:07:56 Speaker 2: No, but I just said you're number one. I didn't say it had to be a pop diva. 00:08:00 Speaker 3: Oh well, number one so number one band? What are we talking about? 00:08:05 Speaker 2: Number one woman, number one fan of. 00:08:09 Speaker 3: Lisa Traeger, and I've got her here, I've trapped her on my podcast. 00:08:14 Speaker 2: Robin is a good one though. 00:08:15 Speaker 3: Robin So, I mean Robin, I mean, really takes her time, does deliberate things. You know, it's going to be exactly what she wants it to be. 00:08:22 Speaker 2: I had her early album. I had the Show Me Love and CD. 00:08:27 Speaker 3: You know, I'm sure a lot of us did. That was all over the radio, and what nineteen ninety seven? 00:08:32 Speaker 2: And then what do you remember the moment where you realize it was the same Robin? 00:08:36 Speaker 3: Oh it's wild. I mean it's a fully different person. 00:08:40 Speaker 2: Yeah, that was, I mean so cool. 00:08:42 Speaker 3: I've since tried to go back to those earlier things, and it's just I don't think that early stuff is any good. I imagine she agrees. 00:08:49 Speaker 2: I like the hits. 00:08:50 Speaker 3: The hits are fine, but like compared to the new Robin, where it's like she's doing exactly what she wants to be doing, I can't even I won't even talk about it. I'll get so up. 00:09:00 Speaker 2: Did you have fomo seeing the video of everyone on the New York City platform after the concert sing dancing to Reno. 00:09:07 Speaker 3: I don't like singing or yelling in Unison. It makes me feel uncomfortable and embarrassed. 00:09:15 Speaker 2: WHOA, that's wild opposite for me. 00:09:18 Speaker 3: You love? Do you like once you have to do a big cheer or this kind of thing where everyone's saying the same thing at once. 00:09:24 Speaker 2: Yeah, maybe it's cause I was in the swim team, and I don't know about a cheer. 00:09:29 Speaker 1: No. 00:09:30 Speaker 2: I like defense. Yeah, I like that. 00:09:32 Speaker 3: It makes me so uncomfortable. I don't know why. It makes you like there's just this huge I feel like I'm feeling every person in the audience's embarrassment is channeled through me, and it's almost debilitating. It's I can't do it. 00:09:45 Speaker 2: I can't do things. I wouldn't want to sing on my own. That takes a lot of effort for me, and I really have to like try hard. But with a group that's the best drunk singing a song you all loved together share. Are you a sober person? 00:10:00 Speaker 3: I don't drink, so maybe that's part. 00:10:03 Speaker 2: This is it, This is why if I was sober, I would hate to go defense. But I yeah, that's that's the key. That's the missing key. 00:10:14 Speaker 3: I feel like I've had jobs though where drunk or not. You I mean, you couldn't be drunk in those situations and people were, you know, yelling like the managers were trying to get everybody excited about something. That sort of thing just sends a shiver down my spine. 00:10:28 Speaker 2: Corporate cheer is different than train platform after a Robin concert, I just. 00:10:35 Speaker 3: Don't want to experience or share an experience with anyone. I think that's my problem. I've just got to be basically a hermit. 00:10:43 Speaker 2: You're a hermit. I like being a I need hermit times I'm social social, and then I will fully shut down in crumble. 00:10:49 Speaker 3: I just read this book called Stranger in the Woods. Have you heard of this? It's about, Yes, a guy who is called the North Pond Hermit. He lived in Maine in the woods for thirty years. Spoke one word the entire time. It's a wild story word. What's the word? I think he said? 00:11:09 Speaker 2: Hi? 00:11:10 Speaker 3: Like he crossed paths with some people once and the rest of the time he was robbing cabins around the woods, and he was kind of kind of became this folklore around Maine. It was like the North Pond Hermit. Then they finally caught him. 00:11:24 Speaker 2: So he was robbing. That's the added little thing, that's. 00:11:28 Speaker 3: Right, but only like you know, the necessities, the bare necessities. He was taking mac and cheese, he was occasionally taking batteries, propane, tanks, just things to survive it. 00:11:39 Speaker 2: And what do you think happened to him? Like why did he need such solitude? 00:11:43 Speaker 3: It's such a in reading this thing, I think that socially there must have just been something slightly askew with him, because when he was twenty, he drove his car into the woods, walked out of the car into the and just left it there and then just went and lived in the woods for thirty years. 00:12:02 Speaker 2: But are we sure this is one hundred percent reel or is this like a million little pieces with the sprinkles. 00:12:08 Speaker 3: I mean, while reading, I was like, he could be lying about this entire thing to this author journalist. But I mean, there's no proof otherwise that it's not true. 00:12:21 Speaker 2: I mean, so he came out, so now is he like out and about? 00:12:24 Speaker 3: He's not out and about he was. This author basically forced his way into the hermit's life. While the hermit was in prison or jail or whatever was happening with him. The author just showed up and said they had been corresponding by letter occasionally and the hermit was reluctant, and so the author just went to Maine and was a visitor and the guy kind of warmed up to him. So then, I mean, my god, here I go. I'm just describing this whole book. This is exactly whatever this is why you're here, This is why the listeners here. 00:12:55 Speaker 2: Well, no, because I like to learn, but I hate to read, so like this is good. Now I have a new information. 00:13:01 Speaker 3: It's nice people are learning about a hermit. But essentially he's now out of prison and has been basically kind of imprisoned by society because he can't go back into the woods. He's kind of I think he's on parole and has to like get a job and be part of society now, which seems like it's the last thing this guy wants to do. But what are you going to do? I mean, he was in the woods for thirty years and he was stealing mac and cheese, et cetera, filling the woods with garbage. 00:13:28 Speaker 2: Now I want mac and cheese so bad. 00:13:32 Speaker 3: Well, that's up to you. You know, it's three point fifteen as of recording. You've got dinner ahead of you. 00:13:37 Speaker 2: I'm not. I can't ruin my day like that. 00:13:41 Speaker 3: Do you start the day with a mac and cheese? Or end it with a mac and cheese? 00:13:45 Speaker 2: M in bed at night in the dark, alone like a whole bowl to myself till it hurts, Like I want to eat mac and cheese. 00:13:53 Speaker 3: This is like a craft mac and cheese and Annie's mac and cheese. Those are the only mac and cheese. 00:13:58 Speaker 2: I know, I'll take both, but I'll so ordering. And recently in New York, I had a mac and cheese and it was this career. 00:14:05 Speaker 3: Oh delicious cheese. 00:14:06 Speaker 2: Yeah, it was really but I had one of those experiences. It's like it was my favorite restaurant and it closed down pandemic and I was walking and I saw it reopen in a new location. So we went. But I was like, wait, where are the Cracker? Wait, there's used to be this, and so I was kind of annoying. 00:14:22 Speaker 3: What restaurant is the Mermaid in who? I've never heard of it? 00:14:26 Speaker 2: They have the best happy hour I've ever experienced, shrimp, corn dogs, the little cups of New England, clam chowder. 00:14:31 Speaker 3: It's like, oh that sounds delightful. 00:14:34 Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm a seafood coal. 00:14:36 Speaker 3: Speaking of all of of confrontation this kind of thing. Before the podcast even began, you mentioned, you know, we've never met in real life. 00:14:45 Speaker 2: No, And I also want to say, how did you finangle your way into a show where people buy you things constantly? 00:14:52 Speaker 3: A wish geus I made, look I do get a lot. I am getting a lot of on this podcast, but it's kind of become an actual problem in my life, you know, like I'm getting a lot of things that I have no practical use for the space. No, I can't regift these things. 00:15:12 Speaker 2: Oh you don't regifts. 00:15:14 Speaker 3: No, they're just kind of piling up. Eventually it's going to crush me. But for the time being, you know, occasionally someone will give me an edible thing, which I you know, can kind of get that out of the way. But it does feel a little bit like Tetrius with the pieces just piling up, and eventually I'm going to it's gonna be an avalanche. I'm going to be destroyed. 00:15:33 Speaker 2: No, I only I can only get my parents' edible gifts because they're they they grew up in the war. Like, they don't like using stuff. They have to save it for a special day. Oh, we can't get it dirty. They hide everything. So I have to get them perishables. 00:15:46 Speaker 3: And so what sort of perishable goods are you getting them? 00:15:49 Speaker 2: So like most recently for Father's Day, sent him a mixed nut platter thing. 00:15:55 Speaker 3: Oh delicious. 00:15:57 Speaker 2: My big thing was on his eightieth I got him Petrosian caviar. 00:16:03 Speaker 3: Oh my god, that's a fancy gift. 00:16:06 Speaker 2: Yeah, it was like eight hundred dollars of caviar. I sent what they could. 00:16:10 Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, how much cat I mean. 00:16:14 Speaker 2: It's not a lot. It's not a lot. 00:16:16 Speaker 3: Is it basically like what would you say, the size of a shoe polish container. 00:16:22 Speaker 2: I don't remember the things, but also comes with little billini things, the crimfresh there's like other things, and it's like over you pay for the shipping. Really, you know it's. 00:16:31 Speaker 3: Ohish oh, because you don't want it to rotten the mail. 00:16:34 Speaker 2: Yeah, and they pack it up. But then they started sending the catalogs to my parents' house, and then they saw how much they spent. They're like, you're mentally ill. We still pay your cell phone bill? What are you doing? 00:16:43 Speaker 3: But they got to enjoy it and yeah that's about it. 00:16:49 Speaker 2: But I send cakes, desserts, flower like it has to be super, super useful or it's going to be hidden away. 00:16:58 Speaker 3: I feel like I have that in common with your parents. I feel like I have I have a hard time using things or like I you know. 00:17:05 Speaker 2: I'll rip the tag before I even try it on. 00:17:10 Speaker 3: I just feel like it could go away at any minute, so I should. I've got to be careful with everything, and it's not a healthy thing. I'm like, which which is frustrating because I'm aware it's not a good way of thinking, but there's no way of overcoming it. 00:17:21 Speaker 2: I guess there's no good or bad. 00:17:25 Speaker 3: I would argue my personal experience is not good. 00:17:29 Speaker 2: I'm just shocked you don't regift. I will be honest, that's a shock for me. 00:17:32 Speaker 3: Well, I feel like that would be a giant controversy in the podcasting community if suddenly my gifts were flying out the window to various people around town. 00:17:42 Speaker 2: I don't know. 00:17:43 Speaker 3: Maybe what I could do. I see, this is why we need to be doing this these in person. Maybe I start regifting the gifts to my guests. Maybe they show up, and then I'm suddenly like, here's you know, the caviar, which I assume you got me et cetera. But look, let's put that aside for a minute, because I do I want to talk to you about Target. You saw me at Target and didn't say anything to me. 00:18:07 Speaker 2: I didn't We had never met, and so I was, you know, I just kept my distance, but I looked at you for a while. 00:18:14 Speaker 3: You followed me around the store. 00:18:16 Speaker 2: I texted Kara, I told her I saw you. She said you live in the neighborhood. And that was that. But we were Yeah, the big Target. 00:18:25 Speaker 3: The big Target. And you say you prefer the small target. 00:18:28 Speaker 2: I'm just closer to the small target. And I hate multiple level stores like that. I can go to a multi floor like Macy's or clothing, but a grocery or Target, I'll always choose the flatter store. 00:18:43 Speaker 3: I think a flat store is more natural for a grocery store. I'm used to a flat store for grocery stores. And the moment I have to put a shopping cart on an escalator, the experience has been ruined for me. And I'm worried that the milk is going to crush the eggs or what have you. 00:19:01 Speaker 2: And I'm jealous. I want to jump in that roller coaster. 00:19:04 Speaker 3: Oh of course, I would love to ride that little thing to the top like a little penguin. No, yeah, that thing. It does look kind of dangerous, I will say, but I wouldn't mind getting in the shopping cart. And just has anybody ever done that? I have to assume someone has. 00:19:19 Speaker 2: Yeah, some skater teens trying to. 00:19:21 Speaker 3: Where a baby has been forgotten in the shopping cart and taken a right to the top of the mountain. 00:19:26 Speaker 2: It would be so scary. But all the small target there's like famous Tacos in front of it. 00:19:32 Speaker 3: Yes, and now I want to hear about this, So. 00:19:34 Speaker 2: The line is so long, And then in some group chatter somewhere, someone told me that people have been food poisoned, like kidding, yeah, friend of a yeah, people are were food poisoned from it. Recently. 00:19:48 Speaker 3: I've been wanting to go there for months. It's one of those places that will decide on a place to go to dinner ed then we'll pass and be like, oh, we could have gone there, But now I guess maybe for the best. 00:19:58 Speaker 2: I'll still try. I mean I would want to. With the line that long, you're I'm curious. 00:20:02 Speaker 3: Right of course, And they have that giant l pastor spit which just makes me want to I could eat that for days. 00:20:09 Speaker 2: But it's like romantic. There needs to be a plan, like well, let's get you know, let's stand in line for an hour. But you can't just do that. You don't want to do that for dinner. If you're just like, where do we go, let's go. Wait, it's like more of an event. 00:20:21 Speaker 3: Right, it is kind of and then you're going to be eating in the target parking lot. It's like you really have to commit to the general idea that it's not a spur of the moment sort of thing, or you have to be like you stumble upon it while wandering around the neighborhood or something. 00:20:35 Speaker 2: But you think I should have said hi to you when I saw you at the Target. 00:20:38 Speaker 3: I would have loved I loved somebody, whether I've met them or not. It's a little jolt to the shopping trip. And you know, it's like it adds a little texture to your my browsing. I'm frequently there for no reason at all, just kind of looking at things. 00:20:55 Speaker 2: So say hello, I will this is a lesson I'll take with me forever. 00:21:00 Speaker 3: I hope. So I hope that this has been a hard lesson learned and that you evolve. Lisa, Look, you agreed to be on this podcast. I feel like it's been a long time in the works, to be honest, it's been months of you know, back and forth our lawyers kind of going at each other's throats. Like Lisa will only be on the podcast under these terms, and I said, I'll only have her on the podcast under these terms. Eventually both of our lawyers were fired, we hired new lawyers. We finally came to an agreement. We're on the same network, for God's sake, and it was still just blood a bloodbath. But you're here now and the podcast is called I said no gifts, and so I was a little surprised. I was a little bit startled the other night when I opened the front door, and to my surprise, there was a box addressed to me. Now it's in kind of a purple bag with a cupcake on it, with a sprink What is that called a spark I was gonna call it a sprinkler, but I guess sparkler is kind of a sprinkler of fire, So I guess I wasn't that far off. 00:22:07 Speaker 2: But did you do that? 00:22:08 Speaker 3: Because I don't know if I say you did that? Look who did it is nobody's business. This could have been done by anyone. It's a beautiful bag. End of conversation. 00:22:20 Speaker 2: Sorry, cut that. 00:22:23 Speaker 3: Keep it. Look, Lisa, I have to ask you, is this a gift for me? 00:22:31 Speaker 2: It is? It is? Yes? 00:22:33 Speaker 3: Should I dive in here. 00:22:35 Speaker 2: I would love you. I would love for that to happen. I hope this is a gift that, instead of crushing you in a pile of gifts, it's something that you go, huh, I will see. 00:22:50 Speaker 1: I like them. 00:22:51 Speaker 3: Huh. Okay, here's some tissue paper. I could do this all day. I would like to do this for five minutes, just dropping listeners left and right. 00:23:02 Speaker 2: But we're not going to I thought there's some asmr creeps. Oh yeah, it is still boxed. 00:23:08 Speaker 3: I'm still in the box. We've got to have a surprise. I think there was one gift recently that I wasn't surprised by. But most of the time I like to be shocked. 00:23:18 Speaker 2: I love a surprise. 00:23:19 Speaker 3: Oh I adore a surprise. I am good or bad, it's just you know, I like a little, a little something new. So here we go. I've got my scissor. I'm flying through the box opening I'm opening I don't even like to look at it until I've fully taken it out and I'm feeling things. It feels like there's two items in here. To be honest, are there two items in here? 00:23:44 Speaker 2: There are? 00:23:45 Speaker 3: There's like a larger one in a smaller one. Should I take one out first? 00:23:48 Speaker 2: I think the bigger one first. 00:23:49 Speaker 3: Okay, bring out the bigger one first and we'll keep the smaller one. Oh, this is a very useful thing. This is great and a beautiful color. It's an Algaene water bottle, which I've been using the same water bottle for about six years now. Wow, it's actually right here, totally destroyed. It's for other purposes. It's metal and can be used as a weapon. 00:24:13 Speaker 2: But this. 00:24:15 Speaker 3: I've never owned one of these, and I'm always so envious of people who haven't because I love to hydrate and these make water look so delicious. 00:24:21 Speaker 2: It was huge in high school, and I feel like the two thousands are coming back. They've been back. We've been living in a denial state, and I thought the cool girls with their north faces and their birkenstocks, they had their anlgenes. 00:24:35 Speaker 3: They're back in such a huge way. Do you have one? 00:24:39 Speaker 2: I don't have an Algaen. I have tons of water bottles, cups with straws. I don't use any of them. They're scattered everywhere. I have tons of plastic bottles. I'm constantly I'm drowning in plastic. 00:24:52 Speaker 3: Do you have like a go to one when you do use them, or are you just picking randomly and using that totra what. 00:24:59 Speaker 2: I could find? But I you know, I'll have a favorite for a couple It's like Barbies. It's like I'll play with it for a few days and then it's like I don't need this, I can't, I'll lose it, I'll leave it. 00:25:10 Speaker 3: Do you feel like you're a hydrated person. 00:25:12 Speaker 2: I have to focus on it really hard, really yeah. 00:25:16 Speaker 3: So like, is this a new thing where you're like, I'm going to start drinking sixty ounces of water a day or is it just randomly you'll think, oh, I should probably have some water now. 00:25:27 Speaker 2: Well, it depends how into my fitness routine I am at at any particular moment. So if I'm going hard courts, like yeah I'm chugging, I'm chugging. But if I'm left to my own devices, just a few. But also if I'm at the comedy clubs, I'll drink more water because they'll give you water bottles. Oh right, So if I or if I'm out to dinner, I'll fucking I'll finish three four glass. It has to be it's like a trough situation. 00:25:51 Speaker 3: Nuts I'm kind of the same where like a pre pandemic, when I was in writer's rooms, there was you know, there was water uplenty. I was drinking constantly, just constantly having to go to the bathroom. I was as hydrated as I've ever been. And then like the first four months of the pandemic, I was probably drinking a glass of water a day. I was essentially a dried up leaf. And now I've kind of recommitted I just fill up this water bottle as frequently as possible. I haven't really noticed any difference in any way health wise, but I've been told it's a good thing to do. 00:26:30 Speaker 2: Well, yeah, it's a good thing. You haven't noticed any difference, is it all? Though? 00:26:36 Speaker 3: No? I mean what differences would I notice? 00:26:39 Speaker 2: Well, one time my friend and I were at the Brooklyn Museum and we hit like a moment where we both were like we got to get out of here. And then we both sipped on the water fountain and immediately we're like, oh, I have more energy, and then we got to stay at the art museum longer. 00:26:54 Speaker 3: Oh well, then maybe my situation is more that I am secretly hydrating, and so I've just I never really noticed a different. 00:27:03 Speaker 2: You're also not drinking. Drinking ruins your life, so you're on like a hamster wheel of having to hydrate because they're just poisoning your body. 00:27:15 Speaker 3: Do you, I mean, do you drink things other than water when you're trying to hydrate or is it just purely water? 00:27:21 Speaker 2: I have greens from this fitness blogger. I love greens. Yeah, it's like powdered greens. Oh helps relieve bloats okay? 00:27:30 Speaker 3: And does it taste bad? 00:27:33 Speaker 2: Taste delicious? 00:27:34 Speaker 3: Really? 00:27:35 Speaker 2: This girl she just went viral on not just like a few years ago, went viral with her weight loss journey and she's so into fitness and now she has an eight like eight figure company. She makes greens. She makes some like powders are all natural, so for weightlifters, I guess they use like pre workout and postwork on stuff, but those are usually chemically So she created because she has borderline personality, so she needs like level stuff, So she created lines of like powders and proteins that are all natural. And I just watch her work out every day. 00:28:10 Speaker 3: Oh that's great. Wait, so did she use these powders on her journey or did she use them after her journey. 00:28:17 Speaker 2: I think after, but they got really big on TikTok. They like if you just drink it every morning, it does help with bloat. I don't know how that interesting. I don't know how. 00:28:25 Speaker 3: And it's just a mix of green vegetables dehydrated and crushed. 00:28:29 Speaker 2: Yeah, something weird like that. But I'll drink anything. I love diet coke. I love apple juice, I love bubble tea, I love a beverage. I love a diet sun kissed. 00:28:38 Speaker 3: Oh I've never had a diet sunkiss. I bet I could get into that. 00:28:41 Speaker 2: Yeah, I love all sodas, but I get the diet version. Like if I'm getting sugar, I'd rather have gummy candies. 00:28:46 Speaker 3: Right, I'm exactly the same. I mean I drank like a sugared soda up until I was probably twenty two, and then made the shift. I was working at restaurants where that you could, you know, drink as much soda as you wanted. And that just feels so dangerous to. 00:29:00 Speaker 2: Me, maybe because I'm a girl who was always diet coke, Like I didn't even think of anything else. 00:29:05 Speaker 3: Oh, sure, and is diet coke your favorite diet soda. 00:29:10 Speaker 2: No, I think like diet rupert. Yeah, diet coke is the most, the one I frequent the most. If I order a sushi takeout, I want to diet coke with that. 00:29:16 Speaker 3: Oh yeah, I love a diet coke. I like a Coke zero. But apparently they've changed the formula. There was this giant backlash against it. I don't know. I don't follow the politics of diet. 00:29:28 Speaker 2: Soda, so I was I'm on BuzzFeed a lot, and they just came up with a thing like huge company blunders, like big companies that like made one one mistake and lost five hundred million dollars, like Red Lobster did and all you can eat crab leg deal and they lost five hundred million dollars. 00:29:45 Speaker 3: I mean, of course, I mean that one I could have I'm not in the Red Lobster or the crab business, and I could have told them that was a bad idea. 00:29:53 Speaker 2: Oh. J. C. Penny did something stupid where like they were like, oh, instead of having sales, we'll just make everything like it's seventy percent off. And then they lost money because you know, like that. 00:30:03 Speaker 3: I remember that one, and they put Ellen is the face. 00:30:07 Speaker 2: Yeah, and they put like some ana like they try to do a third what's a third? A third pound burger? But people didn't realize that that was more than a quarter pound, so they lost money. 00:30:21 Speaker 3: You can't count on the general population's grasp of math when you're like selling anw Hamburgers. 00:30:27 Speaker 2: No, but saying with the Jcpenny people are like, I'm not driving unless I get a deal, and they're like, of course. 00:30:33 Speaker 3: I mean, I mean, speaking as an extremely cheap person who buys almost everything on sale. If I go somewhere and there's not some sort of clearance rack, I'm just like blining my way out of the store. I need something to appear like it's been discounted. I need to look at the crappy little sticker that's been placed over the normal sticker and say, look, I'm ripping this store off. 00:30:53 Speaker 2: Why do you splur John? 00:30:55 Speaker 3: Absolutely nothing. It's again headed back to I'm a I am away of this problem, but I do nothing to fix it, not even a nice dinner. 00:31:05 Speaker 2: You're not splurging anything and anything. 00:31:07 Speaker 3: No, I mean, like I really have to force myself to splurge on a dinner, Like it's a painful experience until it's like months in the rear view, and then I can look back and say, that was a nice. 00:31:19 Speaker 2: Dinner, and what you're in your partner, what's what's the deal? 00:31:23 Speaker 1: Oh? 00:31:23 Speaker 3: He hates it. He despises every moment of it. He's a I mean, I'm sure most people would find it extremely frustrating to deal with me. Do you splurge on things? 00:31:37 Speaker 2: You know? I'm the opposite problem where I'm living in a studio apartment and there's multiple items here that cost hundreds, if not thousands of dollars. What. Yeah, I have a big problem, big problem. 00:31:48 Speaker 3: Like, so, what's like an example of a really expensive thing you bought recently? 00:31:52 Speaker 2: Oh? Recent? Okay. So so it was my birthday, So I was in New York. I want in a soul Cycle birthday ride with a few friends, and then on the way home to the hotel, I didn't have a new outfits. I'd been on the road and everything is and I was like, I just want a new thing to wear tonight. So I popped into the Forever twenty ones as are I was, and then I went into Rag and Bone and I bought a three hundred and seving dollars dress. 00:32:14 Speaker 3: See that does to me. That does sound fun. Like theoretically, I'm like, oh, the idea of going into a store not thinking about the price and buying something the thing, the exact thing I want. That sounds like a I mean, of course, that's a great time. But I cannot do it. It's impossible for me to do. I don't know how to overcome it. 00:32:31 Speaker 2: I'm trying. Oh, my friend's birthday is coming up this weekend. She's in New York and I didn't know exactly what together. And I was in ohair airport. Do you watch the housewives? 00:32:41 Speaker 3: I watched The Real Housewives of Salt Lake City. 00:32:43 Speaker 2: Okay, well, I can't wait for it to start. 00:32:46 Speaker 3: Just about to start, I can't believe. 00:32:47 Speaker 2: Well, this is the famous meme. You know, it's Kyle and then she's pulling Taylor and then there's a cat at the end of the dinner table. It's like a popular meme with the white cat. 00:32:54 Speaker 3: That's sounds familiar. 00:32:56 Speaker 2: So it's like a popular meme. And there's a store at the airport with the purse with that meme on it. And I ran in and I said how much? And she goes two hundred and I go I'll take it, and she goes, you're a good friend. I got Yeah. 00:33:09 Speaker 3: And do you ever worry about money? 00:33:11 Speaker 2: Yeah? When I paid my MXS straight, Yeah, I worry about it all the time. I were not really Actually no, the problem is I don't worry about it or think about it. But the pandemic fucked me so hard and I had to get rid of my apartment. I was living month to month. It was so stressful. I was like, I've really learned. I've learned, but. 00:33:31 Speaker 3: Then you're buying this three hundred dollars dress. 00:33:34 Speaker 2: I haven't learned it all. I'm out to dinner. I'm getting seven dollar iced coffee cold Bruise. I lost the necklace. I went and bought another one of the same kind. I bought this foot Yeah. I bought the sticker of Mary, Kate and Ashley seven dollars. I got a seven dollars sticker. I just like, don't oh, I got I got a hotel in New York for two days. 00:33:54 Speaker 3: That's insane, wonderful. I mean, I guess, like you say, seven dollars cold Bruce, I guess like if that counts, I will uh a few times a week by myself. A decent cold brew before this podcast. But that all like I justify my mind. I'm like, well, I'm about to record the podcast. I need caffeine. I want to enjoy it. I'll go to Collage Coffee. It's my favorite coffee, and I'll spend five dollars. 00:34:18 Speaker 2: Great, Okay, this is good to know. 00:34:20 Speaker 3: So that's that's maybe one little thing I'm willing to spill. 00:34:24 Speaker 2: But I'm gonna have to color my grays. I'm gonna go get my nails done this week. Like I'm just I'm constantly spending, NonStop, no matter what, and I'll find new ways like this call. I have like twelve of these. If I can't find the com I'll buy another one. And this is one. I have two or three of my suitke because I went to stay at my best friend's house in New York and she had two combs that I had left there from the previous trips. 00:34:46 Speaker 3: So I just need to follow behind you closely, and I'm probably going to get some nice item eventually as you drop it or forget it. That's my new shopping philosophy. Just follow these around town. 00:34:58 Speaker 2: Yeah, Like I'm just looking at every it's in. It's truly, it's at it. But you know, I had a nice, thrifty shopping experience recently. I went to Old Navy and they had some quality products. I loved my Old Navy time. Really yeah. I bought dresses, bathing suits. I took my niece bought her some dresses. 00:35:15 Speaker 3: So was this like a new turn to Old Navy or do you go there frequently? Because I feel like, you know, some people may have dropped off with Old Navy then returned correct maybe they've changed their philosophy. 00:35:26 Speaker 2: I haven't been Old Navy in like a decade. I would say, okay, and I was by the hotel in my hometown and I want, yeah, I'll go to Old Navy, see what's up. And then I was like, oh my god. 00:35:40 Speaker 3: I've always had a trouble with Old Navy because I'm a very basically child size adult and their men's clothes are not They don't go to my size. So I always end up feeling like I look kind of sloppy in an Old Navy clothing item. I feel like I feel left out at an Old Navy. 00:35:57 Speaker 2: Where that's a great place to feel out of place. You don't want to feel at home at old maybe, But where do you mostly shop clip for clothes? 00:36:09 Speaker 3: Where will I go? Well, let's say I'll go to you know, thrift stores. 00:36:13 Speaker 2: I will go. 00:36:14 Speaker 3: I'll buy like basic T shirts, you know, an H and M or a Target that basically covers it. I guess anywhere where you can get a shirt for roughly ten dollars. I'm not coming across well on this podcast, I just sound like I'm completely miserable person. 00:36:32 Speaker 2: No, you sound totally fine, and you're gonna be able to retire. 00:36:36 Speaker 3: You're to retire into just total lack of enjoyment. 00:36:41 Speaker 2: No, but you'll be able to relax and finally spend the little money or you know, when the ship hits the fan, you're gonna grab your passport and you're gonna have enough cash to leave. You're gonna get the fuck out of here. So don't be bad. Wait open the get the next show. 00:36:57 Speaker 3: I get into that? Is there anything left any to be said about this now? Jean Water, I hope you use it. Of course I'm going to use. 00:37:04 Speaker 2: The big brim is hard, but it does feel cool. You hold the cat back. It's just like it's like drinking from a waterfall. Yeah, well, I. 00:37:12 Speaker 3: Will say I just recently, well, I can't say I got into but I'm about to get into rock climbing. I'm going to get a rock climbing membership the carabiner. 00:37:20 Speaker 2: That will help this. 00:37:22 Speaker 3: I'll fit right in at the gym. Nobody will know the wiser. Is that what people say? But I'm gonna look like it. 00:37:28 Speaker 2: That's a brag. I had mountain climbing in high school, rock climbing like a class. Yeah, for pe, one of the electives was rock climbing, and like we had a rock climbing wall. 00:37:40 Speaker 3: Yeah, did you enjoy it? 00:37:42 Speaker 1: No? 00:37:42 Speaker 2: I actually didn't. I was not good at it. I threatened a girl and then I had to earn her trust back if I wanted to pass the class. And then I also everyone everyone in the class could climb this net and I just couldn't get to the top of this. Like oh and no, I had a real rough going mountain in rock climbing. 00:38:02 Speaker 3: What you threatened a girl like I'm going to pull you off of the wall or I'm going to let you follow your death? What are we what are we talking about? 00:38:08 Speaker 2: I don't even remember, but there was an issue like I threatened her. 00:38:14 Speaker 3: Okay, let me, get into this book. 00:38:15 Speaker 2: Get into it. 00:38:17 Speaker 3: It got okay here. Oh, I'm beyond thrilled at what I agree? Are these stickers? 00:38:25 Speaker 2: Yeah? There? 00:38:26 Speaker 3: And I've never known how to say this character's name. And these may there may be Hello Kitty or something in here, but so far I'm just saying. 00:38:34 Speaker 2: That's how you say it either. But I love him, and it's all. It's all Karropi. 00:38:38 Speaker 3: I loved Karroopi. In elementary school. I had a little pencil case with Karopi on it. There was also a penguin named Bat's Maru, who I also loved. He was more of the bad boy, but Karropi was my original love. 00:38:55 Speaker 2: Sorry you go. 00:38:57 Speaker 3: On, No, I want to know why you sent these, because it feels like you looked into my past somehow I didn't. 00:39:03 Speaker 2: I love Cropy too. I went to high school with a lot of Pacific Islanders and like Taiwanese, and they just had like the clolest fucking Sanrio stuff, and I love Sanrio and Hello Kitty is too obvious, I don't know, And I thought what the green water bottle Kropi would be it. But I had no idea that you loved Karopi like I did, I do. 00:39:25 Speaker 3: I'm going to put one of these on my water bottle. 00:39:27 Speaker 2: That was I'm gonna put the something. 00:39:28 Speaker 3: I mean, I have so many I can put them on every item my own essentially. Yeah, this is like a pack of fifty Karopi. Listener, if you don't know who Kroopi is, it's the little frog who's friends with Hello Kitty and the rest of the gang. He's very cute and always seems to be up to something. I'm looking at one right now, he's got a crown and a scepter, and then the other one is just kind of smiling meekly. But there are so many in here, and uh Sanrio. Yeah. I actually interviewed for a job there high school, and I remember my cell phone went off during the interview, which I imagined led to me not getting the job. But I could even re employee. 00:40:10 Speaker 2: I thought, you'm like a headquarters. But then now I realized as a teen, it was like the story. 00:40:15 Speaker 3: I was interviewing for the CEO position of San Rio. I had just touched down in Tokyo and my cell phone went off during the interview, and so they just sent me back. 00:40:26 Speaker 2: There was other ones. There was like a choco dog. 00:40:29 Speaker 3: Poco Poco Poco sounds right, poco or choco. There were so many. I feel like Hello Kitty had like a kind of a twin. 00:40:38 Speaker 2: So yeah there because I just watched The Toys That Made Us and I watched the Hello Kitty episode. 00:40:44 Speaker 3: Oh was it good? 00:40:45 Speaker 2: Yeah? It was great. I love knowing the history of I watched the My Little Pony. I watched all the girly toys. I didn't really care about g I, Joe or Legos, but it's a nice adventure. And if you like Robert, there's one called like this is pop Music? Oh shirt episodes all about sweetish producers and Swedish hits and why Sweden comes without with so many hits. 00:41:04 Speaker 3: Oh, I've got to watch that. But what did you learn from the San Rio documentary? 00:41:09 Speaker 2: It's like tiny gift, lots of joy is how it translates to her something, because I guess in Japan it's like really cute, like customer to give little cute things to people. Sure, and so this guy's like, I'm gonna make cute shit and sell it. But there's ups and downs. Is there a mouth? But she's not a cat, she's a girl, and her name's like he kid. She's a girl. She's not in a which way. She's like a girl that looks like a kitten. She's not a cat. That's why she does girly things. She likes the piano. And then like they yeah and like the boom, and then they lost money, and then they came back and now I mean, Hello Kitty is here to stay. Like that's gonna you know, like if you were to put a vessel underground for the future, Hello Kitty would make it. 00:41:52 Speaker 3: Well, I absolutely agree. I feel like Hello Kitty's popularity is cyclical, like every maybe five ten years, it becomes extremely popular is everywhere, and then it kind of quiets down, but it doesn't ever fully go away, because I think everyone loves Hello Kiddy, whether they admit it or not. 00:42:11 Speaker 2: Yeah, I would get at tattoo. Honestly, I wanted a cropy one, but I was like, I I hate, yeah, I want. I have too many trademarked items already, But I do love that. But I also it's the same thing with like I'm wearing my Tiffany's bracelet from back in the day. The coach is back, Like I just think our crew we're in their thirties or in your thirties. Yes, everything our parents didn't let us buy, we get to buy it. Now it's back and we're just living our teenage years again. 00:42:40 Speaker 3: This is what I'll say about the thousands coming back. There are some fun things, but then there's also the trauma of middle school. It's like the wide leg genes, the new metal, these kind of things. I don't want to ever see these things again. I felt like culture, popular culture in particular, really bottomed out from basically nineteen ninety eight too about two thousand and three. 00:43:04 Speaker 2: So to me, that's the height of my life. Like Spice Girls, Britney Spears, the Backstreet Boys, legally blonde, mean girls. These are the things they care about. 00:43:15 Speaker 3: But you're naming the good, the things that were fun. But then you think about kid rock, limp biscuit, corn, wide leg jeans, oversized camouflage shirts. What are we talking? Bowl cuts, bleached frosted tips. I could go on, I could sell. Did you ever go to Gadzooks? No, I've never been into gad zeks? 00:43:40 Speaker 2: Was that kind of Spencer's Like, yeah, but Spencer's but clothing, because I remember I bought gothic pants and my parents sent me back to return them. 00:43:51 Speaker 3: Your parents strict about what you wore. 00:43:53 Speaker 2: They were not about to let me wear gothic pants. I don't think they were strict, but that that took them over the line for sure. 00:43:59 Speaker 3: They like ray pants. Were they like super wide? 00:44:01 Speaker 2: Yes, They're like, you're not dragging around these weird pants. And I thank them for that. But lately my parents have been shading me a little bit because they want me to wear heels again, Like they're each of them separately. Were like, so you don't even wear heels anymore, like you used to wear heels. Oh, how things have changed. I'm like, yeah, heels are done. 00:44:22 Speaker 3: Are heels out as far as fashion goes right now? 00:44:25 Speaker 1: No? 00:44:25 Speaker 2: No, no, no. People are out their club people are wearing heels. I'm gonna wear Adidas with short skirts like I don't. I'm gonna wear sneakers. 00:44:34 Speaker 3: You're gonna be comfortable. 00:44:35 Speaker 2: Yeah, if I'm filming something fancy on television, I'll throw on a boot heeled platform. I'm not wearing a heel. I'm not It's feminine. I'm not being uncomfortable in any way. 00:44:47 Speaker 3: Do you think your parents have got together and were like we're concerned about Lisa's heel. Use like, why are they both thinking about that in any way? 00:44:56 Speaker 2: They just like have traditional gender things their head of, like what things should be, And I'm kind of like they're not their nightmare. They like me, but I'm just like, ah, I think tattoos and sneakers confuse them. Sure, but I wear dresses ninety percent of the time, So I'm like, does this not count for anything? I'm a dress girl. 00:45:17 Speaker 3: Tell him to lay off. I mean nobody. I mean, how many people wear heels regularly. 00:45:23 Speaker 2: It's but my dad will do weird that. He'll like bring a funny vest and be like, maybe you can wear this on stage. 00:45:28 Speaker 1: Like. 00:45:31 Speaker 3: You should do a tour where your parents dress you for the entire thing. 00:45:35 Speaker 2: I'll be uncomfortable, but like my mom, like I forgot what photos we were going through, but it was like I was wearing my patent letter, like fake patent leather, hot pink Aldo heels like tiny little like that's not happening. 00:45:49 Speaker 3: That sounds completely uncomfortable. I had one experience with Aldo where they sold me a shoe that was so uncomfortable and then the customer service was horrible. I vowed never to return. That was two thousand and six, So you remember. I remember. I remember, although and I will that I It'll be the last thing I think about as I go to the grave. I'll think what horrible customer service Aldo had, and then I'll die. 00:46:15 Speaker 2: Well, that's the circuit city of it all. If you pay people a lot and they are passionate or they will be motivated to learn about the products and be better. But if your sales force is just like teens and you're paying them six seven dollars, you're not getting good service. 00:46:31 Speaker 3: Yeah, it's a little bit the in and out where their their employees are all very nice and do a good job because I guess they pay them all, right. 00:46:39 Speaker 2: Yeah, costco and in and out I hear good things. 00:46:43 Speaker 3: It's just common sense. 00:46:46 Speaker 2: It's not common here. No, it's not because the capitalists rulemakers are always like this is logic, Like they don't see it's their own but they think their beliefs are logic. So it's like tough to penetrate well. 00:46:58 Speaker 3: And once everything crumbles them, they'll just move on to the next job to do it at. 00:47:02 Speaker 2: They don't care, they don't They're just sociopaths. We're being held a hostage by sociopaths. 00:47:07 Speaker 3: We really are. It's a scary time. 00:47:09 Speaker 2: Listen. I nailed it with the stickers. 00:47:12 Speaker 3: I am so beyond thrill that I'm so glad that I mean, bless Hello Kitty, Bless the gang. But I'm basically in it for Kropi. 00:47:20 Speaker 2: Me too. 00:47:21 Speaker 3: I had a little money bank with bats Maru, who was sitting on top of a pile of coins. I probably it's probably still in my house somewhere from like sixth grade. But that was my one, my one step outside of the Karopi world. Okay, we have to play a game. Do you want to play? There's a game called Gifter or a Curse or there's a game called Gift Master. 00:47:43 Speaker 2: Well, gift or Curse I do on the on your Instagram. I play the game. 00:47:46 Speaker 3: Oh right, right, so. 00:47:48 Speaker 2: I've played the game, So but what is the other one? 00:47:52 Speaker 3: Gift Master is a game where I give you it's there's a you don't you can't win or lose as much. I tell you three types of gifts, three items this sort of thing, and then three celebrities who you would give them to, and you tell me who you'd give what and why. 00:48:07 Speaker 2: I like that. I like that. I mean I kind of want to play both. 00:48:10 Speaker 3: But I mean we could do you know, we could play this. I mean, we could record a four hour podcast here if you like. You know, the listener is screaming, Ridger, get off the microphone. But let's start with gift Master and if we're in the moon for another game, okay, it's our life gift Master. Ready, I need a number between one and ten seven. Okay, I have to do some like calculating right now. You have the microphone, you can recommend, you can promote, you can do whatever you want. I'll be right back. 00:48:39 Speaker 2: Okay, great. So I have a podcast called That's Messed Up, an SVU podcast. It's on the exactly Right network. Recently, I've enjoyed White Lotus. I thought that was great, written by Mike White, who was on Survivor, which I recommend a lot new seasons starting this fall in September, I would recommend. And I don't do I have nothing. I mean, I watched Clueless on the plane. I must Okay, thank god, I've ran out. 00:49:10 Speaker 3: There are so many things you recommended that I'm like, now I want to talk about all of those things. But again, we have to. We just started watching Survivor for the first time. I'm only twenty years behind, but I'm addicted immediately. Welcome White Lotus is so good, and of course that's messed up. Everyone should listen to. Okay, this is how the game works. I'm gonna name I've basically explained it already, but I'm gonna name three gifts. I'm gonna name three celebrities. You're gonna tell me which gift you'd give which celebrity and why. So here we go. The gifts you're gonna be giving today are Number one, ankle length hair, so hair that goes all the way to the person's ankles. It's a new look for them. Number two a water softener so that I actually can't quite explain. I've I've put it in the list. I know it does something to your water. Uh I, as far as I know, it's a better than hard water, but I don't know what the difference between. 00:50:06 Speaker 2: Learned that from like a Zest commercial was that the green soap like they always used to be like, not hard water like the soap brands just couldn't get enough. But I get it, Okay. 00:50:17 Speaker 3: I imagine it's better for your skin or something. I don't know. And then finally, the third gift you'll be giving today is Olympic fever, so you'll be giving the person kind of the thrill of wanting to watch the Olympics. 00:50:28 Speaker 2: Well, you like to know this. I saw Robin Roberts on my flight this week. Oh you're kidding, and she was wearing US Olympic merch top to bottom. 00:50:38 Speaker 3: She's got permanent Olympic fever. Yeah, that's an interesting move for her and for the entire plane. Everybody gets to kind of just wait, that's going on there. 00:50:48 Speaker 2: The woman in front of me was googling gayel and I had to be like, it's not gayl bitch. 00:50:54 Speaker 3: Did you tell the person? 00:50:55 Speaker 2: Of course not, but in my head I was like, I would. 00:50:59 Speaker 3: Love to hear from the seat behind me, it's not gayl bitch. If anyone ever talks to me on a plane, that's the only thing you're allowed to say to me. Okay, these are the three celebrities you'll be giving the gifts to. Number one Lizzo, who I think is probably gearing up for a new album or something. She's been out of the limelight for a minute. She's back. Number two doctor Oz number three Logan Paul. Now this is do you know who Logan Paul is. I know he's part of the Paul group. I picture kind of a scary looking arian YouTube star. 00:51:40 Speaker 2: Actually, he was on an episode of Lon Order SVU. 00:51:43 Speaker 3: Oh you're kidding. What did he play? 00:51:45 Speaker 2: He played an incel who gamer gate guy who kidnaps a woman who makes video games and does bad things. 00:51:53 Speaker 3: I have to see that. Oh well, then you you've got a decent idea of who he is. 00:51:59 Speaker 2: Then I'm going to give him ankle length hair immediately because I'm sick of him boxing. I'm sick of them making a mockery of the sport. I'm sick of this nonsense. And I feel with ankle length hair, he would not be able to fight in a ring. 00:52:15 Speaker 3: So I would love to see Logan Paul tripping around a boxing ring over his own hair, his own just shimmering hair. 00:52:23 Speaker 2: Yeah, so I'm trying to get him out of the game. 00:52:26 Speaker 3: Very good laser accuracy with that one. 00:52:29 Speaker 2: And then I'm going to give Lizzo Olympic fever because I think she would be fun to watch the events with, Like I would love to be in the stands of a swimming competition with her gymnastics anywhere. Really, I think we'd have a good time eating popcorn watching the games. So selfishly, i'd want her to have Olympic fever to and then I would watch the game with her, the games. 00:52:51 Speaker 3: With her, That makes sense. I feel like I could see her performing at an opening ceremony playing the flute. I feel like she's got a Olympic energy to begin with. 00:53:02 Speaker 2: Yeah, I've been in our lifetime. If the Olympics don't get canceled, should be Yeah, I think she would be able to perform there one year for the show, right, Right, And then I guess I'm giving Doctorraws a soft water machine because he's a health not he would love it, and it's a generic gift that you didn't put much thought into because I don't care about him. 00:53:25 Speaker 3: Right, I think that makes perfect sense. 00:53:27 Speaker 2: Oh, you like health here. I found this at bed bath, And beyond the gift for seats attached. 00:53:35 Speaker 3: I can imagine he's going to at some point circle around to hot water soft water machines and try to, you know, kind of hawk those as the new solution to something. He's always got something that doesn't quite work for what Actually, the actual problem is I can see him going with soft waters like this will cure cancer? 00:53:56 Speaker 2: What have you? That was a fun game. 00:53:59 Speaker 3: Yeah, it is a fun game. And I appreciate you saying that there's a home version listener. The listener should know I made a home version of the game that you can buy online and it's. 00:54:08 Speaker 2: Delightful, entrepreneurial spirit. 00:54:11 Speaker 3: Yes, now, Lisa, I mean we've never played two games on this podcast before. Do you want to play another game? 00:54:17 Speaker 2: Yes? 00:54:17 Speaker 3: I would like to go. For some sort of record, we do have to answer at least one listener message. Do you have the time? 00:54:24 Speaker 2: I have the time. 00:54:24 Speaker 3: Okay, we're gonna play Gift or a Curse. This is truly unprecedented and I am thrilled beyond belief. Okay, I need another number from you between one and ten. 00:54:34 Speaker 2: I'm gonna do another classic number and go with three. 00:54:38 Speaker 3: Okay, we're gonna I'm gonna do this quickly because. 00:54:41 Speaker 2: You know, I'm being a menace, being a menace, demanding, but you know you don't get what you don't ask for, and sometimes you got to ask and be like, I want a few games because I love games. But in social situations when You're like, is anyone ready for heads up? 00:54:54 Speaker 1: Yet? 00:54:54 Speaker 2: People get so upset. 00:54:57 Speaker 3: Okay, I've done an excellent job. This is how gift or a curse works. Oh you know, I'll name a thing. You tell me if it's a gift or a curse, and why there are correct answers so you can win or lose this game or get a you know, a bad grade. Okay, So yeah this the steaks have suddenly ratcheted up to a level that's going to cause you a great deal of stress. Okay. Number one gift her a curse. Gravy. 00:55:23 Speaker 2: Gravy. 00:55:24 Speaker 3: Gravy as in the sauce category. That's you know, usually I feel like most people think of gravy as maybe a brown, fatty thing. 00:55:33 Speaker 2: I'm going, yes, I think it's I think it's a gift. Ah. Why well, if something doesn't taste good, you can wet it up, make it better. Anything that's greasy or fatty is delicious. I didn't grow up with it, and for years I'd be like, no gravy, no gravy, no gravy. And then once it's snuck in, You're like, this is nice. 00:55:54 Speaker 3: Liza, You're right, of course, I love I mean I can't remember the last time I had gravy. But you put that on mashed potato. As you put it on, you know, Thanksgiving, you've got the gravy. Also, gravy can reach as far as a tomato sauce. You know a lot of you know, Italians called the red sauce gravy. So I love a gravy and I have nothing bad to say about it. It's never it's so infrequently in my life that I can't complain that it's like too much. You know, gravy. The word gravy alone is indicates good things too much. 00:56:27 Speaker 2: I love it, and I like a gravy boat. 00:56:29 Speaker 3: Oh, of course, how many items demand their own little boat. I feel like every I mean, every food should have a boat. Should have a bread boat. You should have your cheese boat. The table should be littered with boats. But I can't get everything I want. I'm thinking a gravy boat. Oh, a caso boat. 00:56:50 Speaker 2: Incredible. 00:56:52 Speaker 3: Oh to just pour keso over whatever you want. 00:56:55 Speaker 2: I'm getting hungry. 00:56:57 Speaker 3: Oh, good grief, caso. There's another wonderful thing. Okay, you've got one so far. Next up, this is a listener suggestion. Someone named Mackenzie has written and suggested platform sneakers gift or a curse. 00:57:12 Speaker 2: Platform sneakers, yes, so, but not the elevated wedge ones like a platform. 00:57:19 Speaker 3: It sounds like yeah, almost, you know, we're thinking Ginger Spice. 00:57:23 Speaker 2: Were gift gift, gift gift, and why Well, I love Ginger Spice, I love a platform. I hate a wedge sneaker, but I love the converse platform. I love. Yeah, be a little taller, be comfortable. But it's a little dressed up. And the Spice girls they've done nothing wrong ever, Like what about breaking up? It was frustrating, But it's like Victoria Beca. Maybe we just needed that clothing line. I don't know. And she had so many fucking kids. I mean she has so many kids. Yes, how many kids? She has like four or five kids. 00:58:03 Speaker 3: Wow, that's a decent amount of kids for a Spice girl. 00:58:06 Speaker 2: Yeah. Brooklyn Cruse, Romeo Harper, I think, yeah. 00:58:10 Speaker 3: I think before she is a menace with those names. Okay, Vicky reach out, But. 00:58:15 Speaker 2: She was the first. That's the thing she did Brooklyn before everyone like. 00:58:19 Speaker 3: She said she was the first. Right has she ever been to Brooklyn? Is the big question? 00:58:24 Speaker 2: I think the story is that he was conceived in Brooklyn, and that's. 00:58:28 Speaker 3: Why I did it interesting. 00:58:29 Speaker 2: I hope I'm not making that up. 00:58:32 Speaker 3: I mean, I hope you are spreading a little lie about old Vicky B. 00:58:37 Speaker 2: I'm scared that I didn't get a point on this one. 00:58:40 Speaker 3: Well, nothing to be scared of. You got it right. I think a platform sneaker. You know, they come in and out of style. When they're in style, they look great. Everyone loves them. Wh they're out of style, they look hilarious. Everyone loves them. There's no like. I don't see any problem. There's no downside with the platform sneaker. I would love to as a short person. Maybe I need a pair? 00:58:59 Speaker 2: Yeah, yes. 00:59:01 Speaker 3: This is another listener of suggestion from someone named Lizzie Gift or a curse. Staying in an Airbnb in an international location Gift and. 00:59:13 Speaker 2: Why, Well, I bet it's cheap. Like if you go to Puerto Rico or the Bahamas or somewhere like a real housewife and get an airbnb right on the right on the water, you get privacy, maybe an outdoor shower. It's nice. I can't imagine it not being nice. I was in Edinburgh. I stayed for a month in a lovely apartment with Emmy Blotnik and it felt it felt nice. I liked it. I think it's good. I understand where this person might be coming from. Where it's like, fuck, we're in England and the two sinks, or like things are different or something is shitty and we don't have the language to discuss it with this person. But yeah, same with my sister and or family. They stayed in this beautiful place. It's adventurous. I've been down for adventure and house. Yes, yes, gift. 00:59:59 Speaker 3: Liza, I know, I know you got it. Ah, it's a gift, I think. And this kind of goes into my platform shoe logic. 01:00:08 Speaker 1: You know. 01:00:09 Speaker 3: Sometimes it is a bad situation. We did go to London and stayed with a woman named Labette, and it was a disaster. Her friend died while we were staying with her. She was extremely drunk. There was a family of probably eight in the room next to ours, all smokers. There were ants. It was you know, it was not as advertised. Labette had a full emotional breakdown while we were there. 01:00:32 Speaker 2: You had a white Lotus moment. 01:00:34 Speaker 3: It was an experience. Yeah, it was a total white load. Like I'll remember La Bette for the rest of my life. And then I I you know, when I went to Japan, I stayed exclusively in airbnbs. They were so much cheaper, and you get to stay in the neighborhoods. It's nice. I mean, look, you got to be of course, you have to be careful. And but even if you're a little loosey goosey like me, you'll end up with maybe a labet and you'll get to experience and the owner of an air b andb's. 01:01:00 Speaker 2: Grief and you challenge your relationship and you come out stronger, of course. 01:01:08 Speaker 3: So it's really I mean a win win no matter what you do. Lisa, you've just become only the third winner in I said no gifts history to win, gift or a curse? 01:01:18 Speaker 2: Am I in good company? 01:01:20 Speaker 3: You're in very good company. You've got Naomi Peagan. Wow, she was the original winner. Ed then I unfortunately am forgetting number two. It's okay for that person, God bless them. 01:01:32 Speaker 2: Naomi is fun. That's exciting. 01:01:34 Speaker 3: Yeah, she nailed it. You know some people just get it and listener as Lisa, look at me just promoting things on the Instagram. You can go play, you post your own things you tag I said no gifts. Then we all get to vote on them. It's a delightful Instagram game. Put up the things that you want to see if it's a gift or a curse, and will vote. I hope that was a good explanation. I don't like to explain things. Finally, we're gonna move on now. You know, we've taken a lot of time here, Liza, and youve got generous with your time. We're going to do it. 01:02:03 Speaker 2: We got to help the public. 01:02:05 Speaker 3: This is called I said no emails. People write into I said no gifts at gmail dot com with their gift questions, you know, their general questions about manners, this kind of thing, and I try to talk them through it. My guest tries to talk them through it, and then we ultimately succeed. So let's do a short one here, because we have taken a lot of time, and you know, the first one I've got dialed up here is literally like it looks like a book proposal. There fifty paragraphs. I can't read that. Right now, We're going to do this nice short one and this is maybe the shortest one I've ever seen. It says hybridger My parents helped me twenty six move. Oh sorry in parentheses twenty six she her move recently, I would like to give them a gift to show appreciation for all the help. Looking to spend around fifty to one hundred dollars best a fan. Now she's left her name out so she won't Apparently this is a sensitive subject because she doesn't want mom and dad to find out that she's reaching out to podcasts for gift help. And that's fine. She's twenty six, she's living it up. The parents have helped. What do you give this? What do you give them? 01:03:09 Speaker 2: Fifty to one hundred is a great price, and usually I'm very anti gift certificate, but I think with parents, like money to a nice restaurant in the neighborhood, a dinner out, like maybe theater tickets to a local production. I don't know what's happening in the world with COVID and stuff, but because parents don't want my like, I'm thinking it might be cute, Like I remember one time someone did movie tickets with like snacks and little things like I like, maybe an experience, maybe a bunch of breads, cheeses, something to enjoy that your parents. But I don't know them, but that's what I'm that's that was my my initial instinct. But I will keep thinking while you think. 01:03:49 Speaker 3: That's a really nice initial thank you instinct where it's just something they get to enjoy. There's no you know, you hopefully know mom and dad's preferences as far as food go or their theater preference. Is this kind of thing. All that said, I say, split it right down the middle. Get them eat your gift card to Supercuts. They can go get matching haircuts. That's just top of my head. So that's Look, you've got two options already. But I mean, we can keep thinking. 01:04:15 Speaker 2: We're edible if they're like a partier, if they're like to get down a bottle of something, you know, cheers to you guys, enjoy like if they moved her out of her play you know it's like enjoy this or some edibles if they like to party in that way too. 01:04:31 Speaker 3: Right, Very yeah, a bottle of something is very is a nice traditional thank you gift. 01:04:37 Speaker 2: And then for me for my mom, I don't know if this is a dad that like I always I love the store coming soon, like a really chic fun house sware or a game they could play together batgammon and then they can learn batgammon together. 01:04:50 Speaker 3: Oh, now you're hitting on something interesting, which is there's you know, there's probably gonna be a little bit of coldness at home. Mom and dad have probably grown apart over the years and suddenly the daughter has gone missing and they have to deal with each other. So a game or something that can kind of bring them together in a nice way. Look, here's me promoting again. Send them gift, mester. 01:05:13 Speaker 2: Yes, I think game and then if they're gonna spend time at home like one of those heated foot massage or things are but that's the heated foot massage or a neck like a thing to massage while they sit. 01:05:26 Speaker 3: Right and kind of just in silence and think about how their marriage has fallen, is falling apart day by day. What about sending them a cardboard cutout of you? That's fine, it feels like kind of a kitchy fun thing. I'm missing you're missing me, and they can put it wherever they want. 01:05:42 Speaker 2: It's a sensitive thing for me because my ex did send me a cardboard cutout of herself when she couldn't make it to my birthday and then dumped me. About nine days later. 01:05:52 Speaker 3: Oh you're kidding. Well, that's a weird move. 01:05:55 Speaker 2: So I had this giant cut cardboard of her while she was like, I'm over this. 01:06:01 Speaker 3: What did you do with the cardboard? 01:06:04 Speaker 2: California? I was in New York. Now I don't know who. I don't know if her friend took it or who has it, or if it's in the tray. I have no idea. 01:06:10 Speaker 3: I hope it's decomposing somewhere. Yeah, that's a real weird move. Nine days out from a breakup to send that that, it's like even, I mean not. It takes a lot of time and effort. I imagine to get a cardboard cutout of yourself. Obviously the breakup was on your mind, unless it was a split like last second decision. 01:06:31 Speaker 2: No, she brub She decided I got us a hotel room. It was like over eight hundred a night. Like the wife was gorgeous. 01:06:37 Speaker 3: What are you doing? 01:06:39 Speaker 2: It was like the whole one, whole wall is glass. You see all of Manhattan. It's gorgeous. And that's where she decided to be like is this really gonna work? And I'm like not in the room, it're devastating, don't do it? Here, but anyways, yeah, so that might be a game a foot massage. 01:07:00 Speaker 3: Yeah, you're the options are almost endless with parents who I can I have already assumed have grown tired of each other. 01:07:09 Speaker 2: But I like the cardboard cutout, cardboard cutout, well, a framed thing or yeah that's like cheesy parent though, like a framed thing of the family together. 01:07:18 Speaker 3: Right, how about just a nice photo of yourself to hang on. 01:07:20 Speaker 2: The fridge, not fifty to one hundred dollars. 01:07:23 Speaker 3: Though, well, I'm talking about one hundred dollars photo that for some reason it costs one hundred dollars, either you got ripped off or it's printed on you know, gold, Maybe it's a magnet bridge magnet with you on it. That's just a tiny thing that goes along with the food or the theater tickets. 01:07:38 Speaker 2: Yeah, like if they're food, or even just like a sexy ass food basket with delicious things, like who doesn't like to open a basket and be like oh yeah, yum, Like. 01:07:46 Speaker 3: Of course that's always fun. I feel like that's the go to and then you know, of course, the super cut skiff cards are always there if you can't find anything else. I hate or yeah, two petticures peedicures. That's good. 01:08:04 Speaker 2: Uh oh, maybe a membership too. I like an art museum or botanic garden. 01:08:09 Speaker 3: Very nice. You are trying. You were doing everything in your power to save this marriage, and I'm out here just trying to, you know, continue to push them apart. 01:08:19 Speaker 2: You're trying to be fun. It's like, I just want to give her enough option. You know. I'm looking at my Bart Simpson cookie jar. A cookie jar of like a thing they like? Is I like the Oh I love I don't. 01:08:28 Speaker 3: I surprisingly don't own a cookie jar. I like a good cookie jar. They're very cute. 01:08:33 Speaker 2: I have a one hundred one DOLMATIONI one too, but it's on my parents. There used to be a cookie jar store in Chicago. 01:08:39 Speaker 3: Oh, I would have loved to visit that. 01:08:42 Speaker 2: Yeah. I got my sister a Flintstone's I mean I was there. I loved the cookie jar store. 01:08:47 Speaker 3: Get your parents a cookie jar. That's everyone should get everyone in their life a cookie jar. That's a fun thing to get. 01:08:53 Speaker 2: Yeah. Oh, and you know what, just to be cheesy, A build a bear, do a little message, sing them a song. This a fan. 01:09:03 Speaker 3: I wish you had sent your name but that's okay. We're talking to you, we're talking to your parents, and yeah, Lisa, I've had such a fantastic time. 01:09:14 Speaker 2: Thank you. It's hard to go. And now I'm just like coffee, table books, pajamas, matching pajamas, aceop soap ASoP soap is good though. 01:09:24 Speaker 3: Oh that's a great gift that no one's ever given to me. I don't know what that says about my stop your budget. Yeah, I'm going to start telling people five hundred dollars or more. The gift has got to be extremely. 01:09:37 Speaker 2: Expensive because I do like to follow rules when it comes to that. But it is like, get some aceop soap in the mix I need? 01:09:46 Speaker 3: How do I get a billionaire on this podcast? 01:09:48 Speaker 2: You've had my next celebrities? You had like a Kate Blanchette or something like Tony collect Like you had someone where I was like, what. 01:09:56 Speaker 3: Wonderful? I'm sorry, but I'm talking billion and there are only a few of them. But I've got to get one of these assholes on my podcast, and did They've got to give me a car or a house that's mine? 01:10:07 Speaker 2: We went from luxury soap to a car real quick. 01:10:12 Speaker 3: How do I get someone on here so wealthy that buying me a car or house is just like nothing. 01:10:18 Speaker 2: Did you wait question? Do you like Gaga? Did you watch the Gaga on Netflix doc The Five Foot Two? Now? 01:10:23 Speaker 3: Look, I haven't watched the documentary. I'm you know, I could take her or leave her. 01:10:27 Speaker 2: Okay. So she's driving to meet up with Mark Ronson, who's like a you know, producer. 01:10:32 Speaker 3: Oh yeah, super producer. 01:10:33 Speaker 2: And she goes in and shays, I hate your car. Sorry, and it's like, I gotta not like, did she pay for it? Did she just send a gift? Did she take the cars? He rich too, so he's like, I got it, don't worry. I don't give a shit. We're about to get a number of hats Like I'm just like, what happened after she hit his car? 01:10:50 Speaker 3: That's wild. I need to know the end of that story. 01:10:53 Speaker 2: One day, Hopefully I can ask her one day. 01:10:56 Speaker 3: Well hopefully one day she's on this podcast. Despite the fact that I just said I could take her or leave her, and she gives me a car Goga reach out. Okay, Well this is I have had such a wonderful time and I've gone two useful gifts. I'm just beyond beyond thrill. 01:11:13 Speaker 2: Do you like to swim? 01:11:15 Speaker 3: I love to swim. I wish I had a swimming pool at the podcast. 01:11:19 Speaker 2: I'm gonna rent this pool in the neighborhood one day, and. 01:11:21 Speaker 3: We're all you can rent a pool in the neighborhood. 01:11:24 Speaker 2: Yeah, it's not even that much. I have a special link that's not like on an app. And we I've been Lizzie's been with me karras on this pool. And there's a hot tub too. 01:11:34 Speaker 3: We've got okay, and I'll come swinging in with my new water bottle. Yes, it's going to be a thrill. Yes, listener, you're not invited. I'm so sorry, but this is the end of the podcast, and I hope you've had as good of a time as we have. And if you haven't, I don't know, maybe it wasn't you know, maybe this just wasn't working for you today. And I hope you don't hold it as I hold it against us. I hope that you return next week with a whole with the whole family. Bring the family next time. I love you. Take care of yourself, be careful, do what you need to do. Goodbye. I said no gifts is an exactly right production. It's produced and engineered by our dear friend Annalise Nelson and the theme song is by miracle worker Amy Mann. You must follow the show on Instagram at I said no gifts, that's where you're going to see pictures of all these wonderful gifts I'm getting. You have to see the gifts. Listen and subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Stitcher or wherever you found me. And why not leave a review while you're there. It's really the least you could do, considering everything I do for you. And if you're interested in advertising on the show, go to midrol dot com slash ads. 01:13:00 Speaker 1: I invited you here. I thought I made myself perfectly clear. But you're I guess to my home. You gotta come to me empty, and I said, no guests, your own presences presence enough. I already had too much stuff, So how do you dare to surbey me