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Speaker 1: You tuned into the Gangster Chronicles podcast with Saints McDonald,

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Speaker 1: Rachie Ray Jr. And you Hunter, one of the dicks

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Speaker 1: of soap Bus Network. You don't come do you think

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Speaker 1: you're something new? I absume kind of fact the moha right, boys,

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Speaker 1: I want to shoot their way at the top of

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Speaker 1: the class. You gotta like Nijia, you gotta wear around

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Speaker 1: matter of fact on my lovevation. Right now, you are

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Speaker 1: gonna wake up one morning with your best part up

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Speaker 1: into your mon I like to welcome everybody to another

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Speaker 1: episode of Against the Chronicles. My name is Big Steel

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Speaker 1: with my host James McDonald, and we've got a special

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Speaker 1: brother here to nightmare all the way from Harlem World,

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Speaker 1: the world famous Harlow Boy Cavario. What's correcting with your

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Speaker 1: broke man? Everything is everything, loved one. I'm just head

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Speaker 1: happy to be here and honored to be amongst men

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Speaker 1: over sure, man, I'm glad that we have you in here. Man,

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Speaker 1: I'm a big fan of UM Done. I'm a big

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Speaker 1: fan of Don Deva magazine, man, huge fan. I probably

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Speaker 1: have about fifty UM. I probably have fifty of the

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Speaker 1: magazines in my closet right now. My wife always gets

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Speaker 1: mad until I don't you throw those magazines away? I

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Speaker 1: got you know, you guys man the source in there,

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Speaker 1: you know, just classic magazines. Man, I figured it would

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Speaker 1: be a value one day. Well the games brother, the

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Speaker 1: information that was captured in Don Diva magazine, Um, it's

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Speaker 1: only chronicle there. There's nowhere else that that. There's no

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Speaker 1: other historical record. And you know, I spent my time

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Speaker 1: in the midst like like really in the um the

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Speaker 1: point of birth for a lot of things during the

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Speaker 1: time and doing that. So the stuff that I got

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Speaker 1: was very like firsthand and it doesn't exist anywhere else

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Speaker 1: but in my publication, on my formal publication, so you

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Speaker 1: know it's valuable and that you won't find that information

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Speaker 1: and we else. And it's definitely full of information, not

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Speaker 1: just stories, exactly a lot of a lot of information.

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Speaker 1: And um, I won't lie. When I first started thinking

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Speaker 1: about the richinal like premise for the Gangster chronicles, Don

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Speaker 1: Deva Magazine was one of my blueprints. You know, it's

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Speaker 1: one of my blueprints. I kind of took a blueprint

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Speaker 1: a used proof from from down Devon always get people

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Speaker 1: their credit, you know, from Don Diva from um the

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Speaker 1: where's the guy, Heraldo Rivera just the whole investigative type

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Speaker 1: of journalism thing. And so I wanted a specific skill

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Speaker 1: set when I was looking for the host, you know

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Speaker 1: what I mean. I wanted specific you know, skill set forward.

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Speaker 1: So I'm like talking to my glass, you talking to

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Speaker 1: glasses alone, and I'm telling him, I'm like, man, I

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Speaker 1: got an idea for this show and we kind of

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Speaker 1: just started perfecting it. And so I'm like, man, I

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Speaker 1: probably never be able to find a host that can

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Speaker 1: pull that, you know, pull that kind of thing off.

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Speaker 1: So I'm looking at YouTube one day and uh, I

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Speaker 1: see this guy right here, and so I'm listening to

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Speaker 1: the story and use, y'all look at something, you know,

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Speaker 1: you look at people. You kind of getting number to media,

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Speaker 1: you know. So ILL used to look at something for

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Speaker 1: the first two or three minutes and just kind of

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Speaker 1: just whatever. But it's like, um, I'm looking at this

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Speaker 1: guy right here, and it's almost like I got a

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Speaker 1: wondering to his soul. It was just like like I

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Speaker 1: was it was almost like he was having a conversation

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Speaker 1: with me, but it was through the screen. I was

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Speaker 1: listening to it. I said, that's the guy right there.

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Speaker 1: So I gotta go find him. And when I get

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Speaker 1: in that mode, like I gotta find somebody, I usually

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Speaker 1: i'm using successful. So you know, here we go today.

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Speaker 1: Um damn, I appreciate that. Um I can. I can,

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Speaker 1: honesgely say. I don't look at much stuff like that.

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Speaker 1: I don't. I don't all of this. It happened, but

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Speaker 1: I'm not taking my shop to be big hitted or

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Speaker 1: none of another ship like that. And I'm just the

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Speaker 1: nature of the thing is the nature of the thing, man. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: I'm choking it in. I'm loving it, and I mean

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Speaker 1: it's good for me. Yeah, it's a beautiful thing. It's cool,

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Speaker 1: you know. So in you forming don Dieva, Man, how

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Speaker 1: did you come up with that concept? Like what was

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Speaker 1: your thought? I'm going to start a magazine and I'm

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Speaker 1: just gonna be about the Illers gangster ship ever, like,

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Speaker 1: like what was the premise? Man? You know? It's interesting, right,

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Speaker 1: there's a lot of stories from what I heard really

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Speaker 1: in the periphery because I don't pay attention to the bullshit,

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Speaker 1: but about how the magazine came to be. And there

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Speaker 1: are stories where somebody implied that it was their idea.

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Speaker 1: It's the furthest thing from the truth. There was no

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Speaker 1: one's idea to create Don Diva magazine at all. I

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Speaker 1: write about that. Uh, the I called the accidental birth

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Speaker 1: of a brand um in the beginning of this this

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Speaker 1: is the Non Divil book or Gangsters and Young Guns.

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Speaker 1: And to give you a brief synopsis without giving too

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Speaker 1: much away, in that particular thing is um. The product

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Speaker 1: that people thought was a magazine was really a promo

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Speaker 1: for an entertainment company that we intended to go into

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Speaker 1: film and television. That's why the first logo that I

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Speaker 1: created was a half of Film Real and half a CD,

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Speaker 1: or a half of c D and half a Film Real.

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Speaker 1: So if you take a circle, cut it in half,

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Speaker 1: you gotta d make you know what I mean, boom

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Speaker 1: half the CD boom, half the film Real entertainment. So

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Speaker 1: all of the first magazines say Don Diva Entertainment because

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Speaker 1: that first promo we made for the Don Diva Entertainment Company,

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Speaker 1: That's what the logo was on it. So when people

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Speaker 1: thought it was a magazine, they started asking, you know,

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Speaker 1: we're gonna do another magazine. I was like, oh uh,

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Speaker 1: this was December of ninety nine. Oh, next month, in

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Speaker 1: January two thousand was our first actual, conscious, deliberate effort

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Speaker 1: to create a magazine. It a little too loud, A

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Speaker 1: little too loud? Is that music I get out? So

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Speaker 1: this magazine and you had, this magazine was floating through

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Speaker 1: the prisons and all that heavy heavy. I had five

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Speaker 1: thousand subscribers in the present system here on New York,

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Speaker 1: all over the country country. I started in December ninety nine,

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Speaker 1: but the official launch was January two thousand, and I

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Speaker 1: did it from two thousand, January two thousand to August

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Speaker 1: of two thousand and six, when this was like, h

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Speaker 1: this is not going any further than it is, no

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Speaker 1: matter what effort UP put in your money. No, I

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Speaker 1: was making just enough to keep it growing, but not

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Speaker 1: really to support a lifestyle. Listening to this ship and

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Speaker 1: I get a little noise in the factory, Yeah yeah,

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Speaker 1: I thought that that juju was somebody's phone. But that's

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Speaker 1: what I was thinking, Is it my phone? Because I

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Speaker 1: still hear it. You hear you know, you had the

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Speaker 1: phone that shipping on the floor in the dough. That's cool,

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Speaker 1: but that ain't pick up? Okay, cool cool where um?

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Speaker 1: So officially it was January two thousand that it became Okay,

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Speaker 1: we're gonna do this magazine. But no one that was involved,

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Speaker 1: which was my my, my, my ex of many many

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Speaker 1: many relations, many exes ago at that, you know, at

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Speaker 1: this point. But UM, my ex and I and a

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Speaker 1: friend of ours, UM named Susan Hampstead, we were the

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Speaker 1: three that started this magazine. Um. The funds that came

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Speaker 1: that were used to get the few pieces of equipment,

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Speaker 1: you know, the programs and the computers to do it.

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Speaker 1: Once we decided this is what we're gonna do. Once

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Speaker 1: it was determined that the intent of the first promo

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Speaker 1: piece failed and people didn't pick up on the fact

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Speaker 1: that it was a promo for an entertainment company, thought

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Speaker 1: it was a magazine. It's like that didn't work out.

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Speaker 1: It's like, well, wait, it did work out. So that

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Speaker 1: that bread that we initiated came from we initially started

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Speaker 1: when it came from older Jamaican gentleman, a friend of

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Speaker 1: mine named Tyrone. It was a week King Pen and

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Speaker 1: he got popped by the FEDS just before we started

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Speaker 1: the magazine. But my ex at the time was running

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Speaker 1: his record labels, independent record label, you know, so he

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Speaker 1: would hit her with funds like you know, every soul

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Speaker 1: every night ninety days or so. He just hit her

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Speaker 1: with a few hundred thousand dollars. So he had just

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Speaker 1: hit her before he got locked. And once he got locked,

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Speaker 1: he told her, well, take the money in transferred from

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Speaker 1: my account to your account whatever this and you know,

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Speaker 1: get you know, moved out the way whatever. Happy and

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Speaker 1: so he he just recently told me it's like maybe

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Speaker 1: like six months ago, you know, now this is in.

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Speaker 1: He just recently told me. It's that, he said, Yo,

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Speaker 1: I left. I left with three thirty five thousand dollars.

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Speaker 1: I know I did, but it was not my business

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Speaker 1: that she worked for the guy, you know what I mean.

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Speaker 1: And we weren't together what it was two years after

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Speaker 1: our relationship was over, you know what I mean. We

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Speaker 1: owned cars and home together whatever ever. But you know,

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Speaker 1: other than that, we're just family. So you guys just

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Speaker 1: kind of just at that point then, no, this is

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Speaker 1: at the beginning of don Diva. But when I when

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Speaker 1: when I ultimately left, when I left on Diva, that's

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Speaker 1: when I was like, you know, yeah, I'm I don't

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Speaker 1: want to continue to be entangled with this person going forth.

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Speaker 1: So I immediately changed my numb and everything, and you

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Speaker 1: know that was that. Then later we saw the Hip

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Speaker 1: Hop Weekly. This was away from it. There was nothing

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Speaker 1: to it. The value in it was it was the

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Speaker 1: adventures of me. Anybody that knows, Anybody who was around

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Speaker 1: and saw me saw it anywhere. If you saw it,

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Speaker 1: you saw me. So what you saw in Don Diva

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Speaker 1: was whatever I was doing, whomever I was hanging with,

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Speaker 1: right and when I uh, you know, when I was

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Speaker 1: doing what I was doing. Um, every dime that came

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Speaker 1: in went to the bare minimum of my maintenance and

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Speaker 1: back into the magazine, just just to give it, just

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Speaker 1: to give it this edge. This is this is right here.

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Speaker 1: It's called a perfect bound. Right now. When I first

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Speaker 1: started the magazine that I had no idea perfect bounds,

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Speaker 1: saddle stits saddle stitches, the one where you see it,

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Speaker 1: it's folded, it's increased end, sharp end, just to go

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Speaker 1: from that look to a more official magazine look and

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Speaker 1: give it this perfect bound. That was an additional three

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Speaker 1: thousand dollars added to the cost of printing. At that point,

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Speaker 1: we weren't even doing more than fifty tho magazines, but

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Speaker 1: I was selling every single one of them myself out

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Speaker 1: of my own hand, and I wrote a hundred percent

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Speaker 1: of the magazine UM nine of the time every picture

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Speaker 1: did all the distribution myself away from because I know

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Speaker 1: what it's like to start something. I know the cost

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Speaker 1: that goes into it, and I don't think people ever,

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Speaker 1: they don't think about the exponential costs. They don't think

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Speaker 1: about it. Most people have never created anything. Most people

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Speaker 1: have only worked for other people. They've come to a building.

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Speaker 1: They never thought about how did this building come to

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Speaker 1: exist and how did the businesses within it become to exist.

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Speaker 1: They don't think about that. It's it's just here. So

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Speaker 1: most people never had the experience of taking something from

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Speaker 1: a thought to bring it into fruition. They never had

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Speaker 1: that experience. So you can tell them anything about how

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Speaker 1: how you got what you have. You can tell them anything,

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Speaker 1: and they don't know what the process is. Yeah, exactly,

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Speaker 1: because you know, I think people they don't think about

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Speaker 1: just like websites, for example, Like we got about ten

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Speaker 1: different websites that we run, and they don't think about

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Speaker 1: how much that cost per month. They don't think about this,

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Speaker 1: they don't think about that. It's just a lot of

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Speaker 1: stuff that goes into it. So it's not just as

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Speaker 1: cut and dry because it kind of pissed me off

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Speaker 1: from people think, Okay, you just got a podcast, so

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Speaker 1: you just go somewhere every winds they go talking come home. No,

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Speaker 1: it's a lot of work that goes into that through

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Speaker 1: the week, and it's a seven day a week thing.

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Speaker 1: It's not just um at that moment. It's a seventh

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Speaker 1: day a week thing. So tell me, man, So you

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Speaker 1: say you just walked away from it, man, mm hmm.

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Speaker 1: What don't regrets or anything? None. Bro. When I started

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Speaker 1: Don Diva, I was fresh off the streets. I was

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Speaker 1: you know, my last few years in the street. I

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Speaker 1: spent my time, uh, picking up bread, meeting a cat

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Speaker 1: with a bag in the gym three four hours a day, uh,

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Speaker 1: and and reading four or five hours a day. My

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Speaker 1: last four years in the game. Huh. He was good. Yeah.

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Speaker 1: I was on the block like every day. Like I

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Speaker 1: had spots in different cities, and I was I'd go

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Speaker 1: to blocks and be on blocks. I'll go out there

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Speaker 1: and do twelve hours on the block with my crew.

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Speaker 1: Everybody knows that. So you educated yourself. I educated myself.

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Speaker 1: I read three thousand books since nineteen and have not

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Speaker 1: been to Nobody's prison, and I read everything what they

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Speaker 1: called polly Man. I read everything. I study everything, every subject,

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Speaker 1: quantum physics, metaphysics, history, biology, chemistry, everything that. I was

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Speaker 1: going to ask you if you had any type of

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Speaker 1: journalism background, because the magazine doing Don div Yeah, because

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Speaker 1: it was very well written. I was doing Don Diva.

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Speaker 1: But I've always had an appreciation for writing. I always

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Speaker 1: had an attraction to it in my um, in my

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Speaker 1: intro um I opened up with then just to put

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Speaker 1: this into perspective, this is this is my autobiography, right,

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Speaker 1: raised by wolves. I began writing that as like an

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Speaker 1: introspection when I decided I wasn't gonna, you know, sling

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Speaker 1: drugs anymore, right, And I did it very suddenly. You know.

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Speaker 1: I was home one day, had just come home off

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Speaker 1: the street, and I was like, I was doing my

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Speaker 1: thing in North Carolina and I was living in Atlanta,

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Speaker 1: and I was like, you know what, I'm tired. I

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Speaker 1: don't want I don't do it anymore. It was seventeen

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Speaker 1: and a half years, three generations in. I think the

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Speaker 1: streets have gotten enough of all blood, sweat and tears.

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Speaker 1: And you hadn't got correct at that point. MM hmm. See,

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Speaker 1: so you escaped the game man what they call a

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Speaker 1: statistical anomaly. Yeah, and that's a till that very few

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Speaker 1: people get to tell, you know, anybody level that you did,

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Speaker 1: because it's not like he was out there just moving zones,

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Speaker 1: you know what I mean? M hm, Yeah, absolutely, you know. Um,

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Speaker 1: and I came from a very organized system, so we

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Speaker 1: were very very systematic in our destruction, you know what

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Speaker 1: I'm saying. Um. So, you know, when I kind of

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Speaker 1: fall into this whole journalism thing, it all comes quite naturally,

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Speaker 1: and it's like everything that I did before had especially

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Speaker 1: equipped me to be effective in doing that. So when

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Speaker 1: I began writing this as my diary and just thinking

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Speaker 1: about what I was gonna do with the rest of

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Speaker 1: my life, and the self help books which I read

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Speaker 1: everyone that was created between eighty five and ninety five,

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Speaker 1: every self help book there was, I read, right, And

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Speaker 1: I don't just read it. I studied, like books of

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Speaker 1: my own that I've written in a response to the

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Speaker 1: information I was taking, because a lot of it said

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Speaker 1: engage with the information, you know, meaning you read something

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Speaker 1: that it impacts you know, people highlight Why why do

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Speaker 1: you highlight? You highlight? Because there's something about this particular

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Speaker 1: sentence or statement that resonates with you. So instead of

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Speaker 1: highlighting right it right the phrase or the paragraph, I've

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Speaker 1: written the whole pages, several of them, because it resonated

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Speaker 1: with me like that. And because I did that, and

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Speaker 1: writing is a psycho neural you know, activity, muscular activity, writing,

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Speaker 1: it imprinted on my sulbconscious it became me. So it

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Speaker 1: wasn't just something I knew it. It came something I

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Speaker 1: did because I understood the connection between what's happening in

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Speaker 1: here and what I'm doing in the world like that. Dude,

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Speaker 1: most people don't learning can pick up that concept. It

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Speaker 1: would take you so long to even condition yourself to

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Speaker 1: do that. Well, the thing is, I became aware of

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Speaker 1: that right and it became first my unconscious then conscious

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Speaker 1: um drive and motivation to figure out a way two

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Speaker 1: share exposed what I had become exposed to, which was

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Speaker 1: that information was the only thing that was truly gangster.

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Speaker 1: Knowledge is the only thing truly gangster. Everything they think

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Speaker 1: it's period. So I wanted to um extend and expand

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Speaker 1: the whole concept of gangsterism since I knew they were

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00:16:48,520 --> 00:16:52,080
Speaker 1: so so attracted to it. You know, and that's why

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Speaker 1: Don Diva read the way to read. I wrote stories

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Speaker 1: or articles in Don Diva in two thousand about the

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Speaker 1: the chi and chipping plantation and where the chip came from.

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Speaker 1: You know what the chip, who created, what they created for,

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Speaker 1: and what it was then used for after the creator

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Speaker 1: created it. Remember reading an article? Right, that kind of

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Speaker 1: information never makes its way to uh those of us

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Speaker 1: who will be most impacted by the lack of information. Right.

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Speaker 1: So I knew there was a thousand a million of

305
00:17:22,560 --> 00:17:24,719
Speaker 1: the means out there who just needed to have somebody

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Speaker 1: who understood that information and understood them well enough that

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Speaker 1: they could convey the information to them and they can

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Speaker 1: understand its relevance in their life. That's all. That is

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Speaker 1: my purpose. That is the reason I get up every day,

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Speaker 1: to the reason I opened my mouth, because that is

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Speaker 1: most important. That there's nothing. Here's the big problem to that.

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Speaker 1: Solutions I'm trying to and and I'm gonna give you one.

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Speaker 1: The problem with that is a lot of people in

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Speaker 1: the hood today can relate to the way you explain

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Speaker 1: things and and certain things they he he's thinking like this,

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Speaker 1: He's thinking, I don't understand what you're talking about. So

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Speaker 1: they not let me turn from this. Let me not

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Speaker 1: what you mean you mean, because I'm not saying you

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Speaker 1: know what I'm saying, my nigga, like check this ship out,

320
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Speaker 1: but do like on some real ship. You gotta think, son,

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Speaker 1: when you're going out there and doing this ship you're doing,

322
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Speaker 1: you gotta be like, yo, so I'm gonna gona he

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Speaker 1: get this motherfucker back right what I'm saying, like when

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00:18:23,359 --> 00:18:26,719
Speaker 1: you go get that motherfucking back, Like just understand something, like,

325
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Speaker 1: my nigga, I'm only talking away. I'm talking because I

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Speaker 1: like to express myself in that way. But I'm from

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Speaker 1: that thing like that for real though, Like for real though,

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Speaker 1: So I know who to say what to and how

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Speaker 1: to say it to him to make sure I don't

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Speaker 1: just talk to hear myself. I want the mother to

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Speaker 1: underdig me. I don't him up. That's what I'm talking about. Yes, yes,

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Speaker 1: I mean initially I didn't. So it was a lot

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Speaker 1: of things that I put out there that I thought

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Speaker 1: would resonate with people. And because and this was the

335
00:19:00,160 --> 00:19:03,520
Speaker 1: advantage of dogging myself like I did you know, um

336
00:19:03,520 --> 00:19:06,119
Speaker 1: writing all the articles and doing all the distribution and

337
00:19:06,200 --> 00:19:09,520
Speaker 1: setting up all the retail locations and you know, just

338
00:19:09,600 --> 00:19:12,359
Speaker 1: doing everything. You know what I'm saying, like realistically, you know,

339
00:19:12,560 --> 00:19:15,960
Speaker 1: um um, my partner she handled you know, the stuff

340
00:19:16,000 --> 00:19:19,320
Speaker 1: inside the office, the business I generated being out on

341
00:19:19,359 --> 00:19:21,639
Speaker 1: the street. She was there to receive that and manage that.

342
00:19:21,680 --> 00:19:24,080
Speaker 1: And she was competent and responsible and capable of doing that,

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Speaker 1: which is why after our relationship I would continue to

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Speaker 1: have anything to do with her, because she had a

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00:19:28,560 --> 00:19:30,960
Speaker 1: practical purpose and not for nothing. That's one of the

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Speaker 1: main tenants of gangsterism. If you're around me, you serve

347
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Speaker 1: a purpose. Period. You could be my girl, mana, whoever,

348
00:19:39,960 --> 00:19:42,080
Speaker 1: but you gotta serve a purpose because I don't have

349
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Speaker 1: time for people who don't serve a purpose. I just

350
00:19:44,840 --> 00:19:46,520
Speaker 1: don't have time. I may love you and everything, but

351
00:19:46,560 --> 00:19:49,800
Speaker 1: you will rarely see me the purpose people won't. They're

352
00:19:49,800 --> 00:19:51,480
Speaker 1: the ones who have my time and attention because I

353
00:19:51,480 --> 00:19:56,119
Speaker 1: got one mission. Get to the money. That's really what

354
00:19:56,160 --> 00:19:58,840
Speaker 1: it was, you know, get to the money, and maintained

355
00:19:58,840 --> 00:20:03,200
Speaker 1: the think I don't care well, you know, I want

356
00:20:03,200 --> 00:20:05,680
Speaker 1: to go back to a partners. You mentioned something that's deep, man.

357
00:20:06,440 --> 00:20:09,400
Speaker 1: You said that you were a third generation hustler. Man

358
00:20:09,560 --> 00:20:13,080
Speaker 1: and talk us talk about that a little bit, because

359
00:20:13,080 --> 00:20:14,800
Speaker 1: that's deep, man. So that was kind of like your

360
00:20:14,800 --> 00:20:18,040
Speaker 1: family trade. You know, you have some families there and um,

361
00:20:18,080 --> 00:20:20,560
Speaker 1: they may own seven elevens, they may own the chain

362
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Speaker 1: of restaurants. You guys were into cocaine and heroron distribute

363
00:20:25,240 --> 00:20:30,280
Speaker 1: cocaine and Erwin distribution, to my correctness, heroin primarily. Yeah,

364
00:20:30,880 --> 00:20:34,280
Speaker 1: So that means you guys probably go back to the

365
00:20:34,400 --> 00:20:38,600
Speaker 1: late fifties and sixties with that three generations. Tell me

366
00:20:38,640 --> 00:20:40,399
Speaker 1: about that. Who was the first one that kind of

367
00:20:40,400 --> 00:20:42,800
Speaker 1: got off the boat that because obviously if people weren't

368
00:20:42,840 --> 00:20:45,800
Speaker 1: getting cracked like that, if you were able to elude

369
00:20:45,840 --> 00:20:48,280
Speaker 1: capture for that loan, that means you had a hell

370
00:20:48,320 --> 00:20:51,520
Speaker 1: of a system. I mean, you know, it was a

371
00:20:52,680 --> 00:20:56,159
Speaker 1: it was a different time. First of all, when we

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Speaker 1: did the things we did, and y'all can relate to this,

373
00:20:58,960 --> 00:21:01,240
Speaker 1: We did the things we did acting in our neighborhoods.

374
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Speaker 1: Who gave a fuck, We can get away with a

375
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Speaker 1: lot of ship, nobody care, and anybody who was unfortunate

376
00:21:07,960 --> 00:21:10,400
Speaker 1: or foolish enough to interlope into our space, they would

377
00:21:10,400 --> 00:21:13,720
Speaker 1: subject to those same rules. Now they were two light

378
00:21:13,760 --> 00:21:16,720
Speaker 1: of complexion. Then somebody might come around asking some questions,

379
00:21:17,359 --> 00:21:19,159
Speaker 1: but there was always one of two of them that

380
00:21:19,280 --> 00:21:21,159
Speaker 1: had the okay to come in and you caught for

381
00:21:21,160 --> 00:21:24,280
Speaker 1: everybody else and bring it back to them. So the

382
00:21:24,440 --> 00:21:27,720
Speaker 1: things that uh, we're being done back then to the

383
00:21:27,760 --> 00:21:30,520
Speaker 1: magnitude that my family was doing it like it was

384
00:21:30,560 --> 00:21:33,640
Speaker 1: happening in Harlem. I mean, you talked about the time

385
00:21:33,640 --> 00:21:39,560
Speaker 1: when they were maybe uh half a million herointics in America,

386
00:21:40,560 --> 00:21:44,040
Speaker 1: eighty percent of them were in Harlem. This is a

387
00:21:44,240 --> 00:21:48,720
Speaker 1: statistical historical fact, you know what I'm saying. He was

388
00:21:48,760 --> 00:21:54,119
Speaker 1: a whole different animal, heroin man to the devil. And

389
00:21:54,200 --> 00:21:56,560
Speaker 1: that's why I could never dabble in it man, because

390
00:21:56,840 --> 00:22:00,800
Speaker 1: there was the German for us who was the company

391
00:22:00,880 --> 00:22:04,480
Speaker 1: that made it, patented it and then sold the people

392
00:22:04,840 --> 00:22:07,760
Speaker 1: and told the doctors that tells people that it was

393
00:22:07,840 --> 00:22:11,720
Speaker 1: for headaches and stress, and people are going and get

394
00:22:11,760 --> 00:22:15,480
Speaker 1: it over the counter, and then people got strung out.

395
00:22:15,680 --> 00:22:20,239
Speaker 1: Then they made it illegal after creating a demand for

396
00:22:20,320 --> 00:22:23,800
Speaker 1: something that it hears itself to you human gooing, so

397
00:22:23,920 --> 00:22:27,840
Speaker 1: you can't function it. You figure, heroin is a different drug,

398
00:22:27,880 --> 00:22:31,959
Speaker 1: and the fact than it sticks to your receptors, so

399
00:22:32,040 --> 00:22:34,439
Speaker 1: when you don't have it, it's almost like you're burning alive.

400
00:22:34,560 --> 00:22:38,399
Speaker 1: So because most heroin addicts, they don't take heroinin to

401
00:22:38,440 --> 00:22:42,359
Speaker 1: get hid the functions. So when you that's right, So

402
00:22:42,400 --> 00:22:44,400
Speaker 1: when you start out, my sister was the heroin atic.

403
00:22:44,920 --> 00:22:48,639
Speaker 1: My first cousin of four of my first cousins were

404
00:22:48,680 --> 00:22:51,639
Speaker 1: heroin addics, you know, like I grew up with it

405
00:22:51,680 --> 00:22:55,520
Speaker 1: in my home, right, so I lived with this reality.

406
00:22:55,880 --> 00:23:00,840
Speaker 1: I overstand it a very personal, you know, perspective like

407
00:23:00,880 --> 00:23:04,800
Speaker 1: for real, right, running souls and ulcers, the size of

408
00:23:05,480 --> 00:23:09,359
Speaker 1: pieces and ship like that. Mother could fallen asleep nodding

409
00:23:09,400 --> 00:23:14,359
Speaker 1: off in Millie conversation, and you're like, I'm hungry. You know.

410
00:23:14,520 --> 00:23:17,520
Speaker 1: My mother left to go hand love business and got

411
00:23:17,520 --> 00:23:19,000
Speaker 1: me sitting with my sister to make sure that she

412
00:23:19,040 --> 00:23:25,160
Speaker 1: don't go nowhere. But she's a dophing right When when

413
00:23:25,240 --> 00:23:29,040
Speaker 1: that when you first started messing with it, right, you

414
00:23:29,040 --> 00:23:32,240
Speaker 1: develop yourself what they're called a little chippy, you know. Right,

415
00:23:32,400 --> 00:23:35,679
Speaker 1: so you're weaken warrior, you're good, you can function, you

416
00:23:35,720 --> 00:23:40,159
Speaker 1: go out. You're actually getting high, all right, three or

417
00:23:40,200 --> 00:23:43,439
Speaker 1: four times in especially back then. We need a thing

418
00:23:43,480 --> 00:23:46,520
Speaker 1: that was taken, you know, Like I grew up on

419
00:23:46,520 --> 00:23:49,359
Speaker 1: a hundred fifteen Street. I'm from Huntret Street, sixty Street,

420
00:23:49,359 --> 00:23:52,800
Speaker 1: fourteen Street, eight Avenue, seventh Avenue. Blue Magic was being

421
00:23:52,840 --> 00:23:59,520
Speaker 1: sold right on the corner of my block, Frank. But

422
00:23:59,760 --> 00:24:05,080
Speaker 1: I know Frank. I knew Frank. And so it would

423
00:24:05,080 --> 00:24:08,960
Speaker 1: be so much people on the corner copping and bopping.

424
00:24:09,160 --> 00:24:11,199
Speaker 1: They used to have to run the bus down to

425
00:24:11,280 --> 00:24:14,359
Speaker 1: Manhattan Avenue to get up past sixteen Street and come

426
00:24:14,400 --> 00:24:17,720
Speaker 1: back up to the Avenue. There was that much activity, right,

427
00:24:17,760 --> 00:24:21,040
Speaker 1: So that's that's the environment that these people were in.

428
00:24:21,440 --> 00:24:23,439
Speaker 1: And it was like that. So if anybody not to

429
00:24:23,440 --> 00:24:25,600
Speaker 1: get high back then I got one cousin that I

430
00:24:25,640 --> 00:24:28,919
Speaker 1: know too, that I knew for sure, never messed around.

431
00:24:28,920 --> 00:24:32,920
Speaker 1: Everybody else messed around. Right, So now you've got this

432
00:24:32,920 --> 00:24:35,199
Speaker 1: this environment where these young people are coming up and

433
00:24:35,240 --> 00:24:37,480
Speaker 1: they don't really know what the heroin is actually doing,

434
00:24:37,840 --> 00:24:39,080
Speaker 1: you know what I mean, only know is that this

435
00:24:39,160 --> 00:24:41,720
Speaker 1: is the high and they're getting strong out of the

436
00:24:41,760 --> 00:24:45,840
Speaker 1: four uses, strung out, you're strong, you're stuck. So it

437
00:24:46,040 --> 00:24:49,280
Speaker 1: used to be you take it and you high. Then

438
00:24:49,440 --> 00:24:53,320
Speaker 1: is you take it and you're not so high, But

439
00:24:53,440 --> 00:24:56,879
Speaker 1: then it's you down. Here is your norm and getting

440
00:24:56,960 --> 00:24:59,280
Speaker 1: high is your old norm. Now you're taking it just

441
00:24:59,320 --> 00:25:01,000
Speaker 1: to feel as good as you used to feel before

442
00:25:01,000 --> 00:25:03,159
Speaker 1: you started messing around with heroin. And that's where the

443
00:25:03,240 --> 00:25:06,840
Speaker 1: overdose and that's where the overdoses coming in. That because

444
00:25:07,080 --> 00:25:09,119
Speaker 1: we're trying to get yeah, because it's really big in

445
00:25:09,160 --> 00:25:14,399
Speaker 1: the Midwest, and New Orleans has a fifty of the

446
00:25:14,440 --> 00:25:19,440
Speaker 1: people in New Orleans before I know, before um then

447
00:25:19,480 --> 00:25:24,520
Speaker 1: trained thing of them were on heroin. M that's huge.

448
00:25:24,800 --> 00:25:28,800
Speaker 1: And they started as young as nine years old. Oh yeah, man, man,

449
00:25:29,320 --> 00:25:31,480
Speaker 1: why why do you think that's so cold? But this like,

450
00:25:32,320 --> 00:25:36,960
Speaker 1: don't feed larceny. Right, it's a level of larcity that

451
00:25:37,280 --> 00:25:40,159
Speaker 1: is like unfathomable. Bro, Like you you won't even be

452
00:25:40,280 --> 00:25:44,840
Speaker 1: to get your mind around about. Okay, right, Why do

453
00:25:44,920 --> 00:25:48,440
Speaker 1: you think those young people in New Orleans are so

454
00:25:49,040 --> 00:25:51,560
Speaker 1: cold blooded and vicious some of your if you don't

455
00:25:51,600 --> 00:25:54,879
Speaker 1: tune into those places, you don't know how crazy some

456
00:25:55,000 --> 00:25:56,680
Speaker 1: of the crimes that go on there with a pretty

457
00:25:57,000 --> 00:26:00,680
Speaker 1: regular degree, you know, a great degree. Well, it's pretty

458
00:26:00,680 --> 00:26:03,639
Speaker 1: easy when somebody needs to fix, when somebody needs their fixed,

459
00:26:03,680 --> 00:26:07,040
Speaker 1: it's easy to tell a kid there's thirteen years old.

460
00:26:07,119 --> 00:26:09,159
Speaker 1: Hey man, I'm gonna give you this, Graham, but I

461
00:26:09,240 --> 00:26:10,440
Speaker 1: need you to go in there and shoot all the

462
00:26:10,520 --> 00:26:13,320
Speaker 1: motherfucker's in that room and they're head it's gonna go.

463
00:26:13,440 --> 00:26:22,440
Speaker 1: Get that's done. Ship, that's done. Right back back, come back,

464
00:26:23,520 --> 00:26:27,000
Speaker 1: it's still hot. Yeah, come on, let's go all day

465
00:26:27,760 --> 00:26:31,000
Speaker 1: teams of them. I just talked to b G and

466
00:26:31,040 --> 00:26:33,480
Speaker 1: all of them about this way you back twent years

467
00:26:33,480 --> 00:26:35,119
Speaker 1: ago he was talking them about this like yo like

468
00:26:35,400 --> 00:26:39,560
Speaker 1: because they was all working around. Yeah, which you know,

469
00:26:40,080 --> 00:26:41,800
Speaker 1: not to get into the whole thing with baby, because

470
00:26:41,840 --> 00:26:43,920
Speaker 1: that's actually my man, you know, shout out the bird.

471
00:26:44,000 --> 00:26:47,240
Speaker 1: But but that's how Bird was able to kind of

472
00:26:47,600 --> 00:26:49,560
Speaker 1: keep them dudes at the place where they was at

473
00:26:49,600 --> 00:26:52,600
Speaker 1: because all of them, you know about if I'm good,

474
00:26:52,680 --> 00:26:54,560
Speaker 1: I got I got some jewels on, I could dip

475
00:26:54,560 --> 00:26:56,520
Speaker 1: any time I want to when acase somebody else got

476
00:26:56,600 --> 00:26:58,960
Speaker 1: my back and all that. I ain't never dreamt of

477
00:26:59,000 --> 00:27:01,080
Speaker 1: nothing better than this. Are you kidding me? Hell? Yeah?

478
00:27:01,119 --> 00:27:03,240
Speaker 1: It was good. Yeah, you can get whenever you want to.

479
00:27:03,400 --> 00:27:05,439
Speaker 1: You know, you got a couple of thousand in your pocket.

480
00:27:05,520 --> 00:27:07,200
Speaker 1: You know you got a car to ride around. Not

481
00:27:08,400 --> 00:27:11,800
Speaker 1: stand the mad because you're the bag. Because I think

482
00:27:11,840 --> 00:27:15,000
Speaker 1: a lot of people, you know, if you looked at

483
00:27:15,080 --> 00:27:16,800
Speaker 1: B G. Back then, though, a lot of people thought

484
00:27:16,840 --> 00:27:19,680
Speaker 1: that was just They thought that that was the New

485
00:27:19,840 --> 00:27:23,200
Speaker 1: Orleans swagger to be just kind of just like falling

486
00:27:23,200 --> 00:27:25,119
Speaker 1: asleep doing the interview, and they thought it was just

487
00:27:25,240 --> 00:27:28,600
Speaker 1: a swag. No them dudes, was they're so cool? Yeah,

488
00:27:28,640 --> 00:27:30,159
Speaker 1: there was not enough, you know what I mean, It

489
00:27:30,240 --> 00:27:31,960
Speaker 1: was not enough. They was on that you know, on

490
00:27:32,080 --> 00:27:35,160
Speaker 1: that show. You you lived on the block watching all

491
00:27:35,240 --> 00:27:38,360
Speaker 1: this ship Jo, how you didn't get in? I mean,

492
00:27:38,520 --> 00:27:42,040
Speaker 1: what you had to to keep you away from all that,

493
00:27:42,880 --> 00:27:44,920
Speaker 1: um to the degree I kept what you mean in

494
00:27:45,119 --> 00:27:49,840
Speaker 1: terms of my own use. Yeah, uh, what I just said,

495
00:27:50,160 --> 00:27:53,480
Speaker 1: just watching swords and just the whole there was nothing

496
00:27:53,560 --> 00:27:56,800
Speaker 1: attractive about it, nothing sexy about it. See, my generation

497
00:27:56,960 --> 00:27:59,840
Speaker 1: got the opportunity to see what happens to the people.

498
00:28:00,320 --> 00:28:03,880
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, the aids, man, the aids before a wait

499
00:28:03,920 --> 00:28:08,800
Speaker 1: before hid wow man, but even then before then, man,

500
00:28:08,880 --> 00:28:10,560
Speaker 1: like you talk about the swords, we used to have

501
00:28:10,680 --> 00:28:13,760
Speaker 1: them in Cleveland. They will walk around down a hundred

502
00:28:13,800 --> 00:28:16,919
Speaker 1: and five, man, you would see the most beautiful black women,

503
00:28:18,680 --> 00:28:21,119
Speaker 1: you know, just the most beautiful black women to be hookers.

504
00:28:21,200 --> 00:28:22,920
Speaker 1: Like you just walk down a hundred five and see

505
00:28:22,960 --> 00:28:26,439
Speaker 1: these beautiful, like fine women and they were just different

506
00:28:26,480 --> 00:28:28,600
Speaker 1: back because you had real pimping going on. So the

507
00:28:28,680 --> 00:28:32,359
Speaker 1: girls was just really just they was just fine. You know,

508
00:28:32,400 --> 00:28:34,760
Speaker 1: they stepped out of the Mercedes or Rose Wars and

509
00:28:34,760 --> 00:28:36,560
Speaker 1: then you know the man sitting down the block. But

510
00:28:36,640 --> 00:28:38,760
Speaker 1: then you saw that go from that to where the

511
00:28:38,920 --> 00:28:42,000
Speaker 1: pimp started getting more raggedy because he was on there.

512
00:28:42,880 --> 00:28:44,880
Speaker 1: And then you see his girl she kind of just

513
00:28:44,960 --> 00:28:46,960
Speaker 1: springing it up. Then you see that same dress he

514
00:28:47,040 --> 00:28:49,160
Speaker 1: had on, his raggedy and she kind of walking like this.

515
00:28:49,800 --> 00:28:52,000
Speaker 1: It's like they're leaning, man. You know, you can see

516
00:28:52,040 --> 00:28:53,880
Speaker 1: people leaning on on air. You see a whole bunch

517
00:28:53,880 --> 00:28:57,520
Speaker 1: of people leaning on air. You know, a bunch of

518
00:28:57,560 --> 00:29:00,280
Speaker 1: people leaning on air. They hundred five just like you know,

519
00:29:00,360 --> 00:29:02,040
Speaker 1: and they just like this, and you know they're running

520
00:29:02,080 --> 00:29:03,680
Speaker 1: up to your car. You're like, oh no, and they

521
00:29:03,800 --> 00:29:06,120
Speaker 1: got the things. And then I'm gonna tell you, man,

522
00:29:07,200 --> 00:29:08,880
Speaker 1: it hit hard in Cleveland to because it was one

523
00:29:08,880 --> 00:29:10,520
Speaker 1: of them cities. I had a whole bunch of friends

524
00:29:10,560 --> 00:29:12,680
Speaker 1: that got impacted by hair and one of stuff. Just

525
00:29:12,880 --> 00:29:16,920
Speaker 1: really man, this I'm talking about man like eighty five, man,

526
00:29:17,000 --> 00:29:20,160
Speaker 1: eighty six man, just like I'm talking about young people man,

527
00:29:20,360 --> 00:29:22,880
Speaker 1: just and you know if you it kind of went

528
00:29:22,960 --> 00:29:25,800
Speaker 1: from the heroine to the crack because you're talking about

529
00:29:25,920 --> 00:29:29,840
Speaker 1: something that's easily attainable, and it's a mass distribution, and

530
00:29:29,880 --> 00:29:32,080
Speaker 1: it's cheap. You can go get a fixed air on

531
00:29:32,200 --> 00:29:35,280
Speaker 1: for two dollars. Man, you can get for two dollars

532
00:29:35,320 --> 00:29:37,040
Speaker 1: real quick, you know what I mean. And you see me,

533
00:29:37,200 --> 00:29:40,600
Speaker 1: you're going um on the way to school. Man, we

534
00:29:41,160 --> 00:29:42,920
Speaker 1: would walk past this. You know, you got all the

535
00:29:43,240 --> 00:29:46,160
Speaker 1: vacant lots in the Midwest, you walk through, take shortcuts right,

536
00:29:46,160 --> 00:29:48,800
Speaker 1: you know, dunk up under the fence, walked there, needles

537
00:29:48,840 --> 00:29:51,480
Speaker 1: all over the crown because at nighttime you can just

538
00:29:51,560 --> 00:29:54,680
Speaker 1: see the lighters flicking. Man, a little music playing. They're back.

539
00:29:54,720 --> 00:29:57,520
Speaker 1: They're just getting wasted. And that's when the murder rate

540
00:29:57,680 --> 00:30:04,120
Speaker 1: just And I tell people, man, ocine what nothing like heroin, Dude, nothing.

541
00:30:04,280 --> 00:30:07,560
Speaker 1: It's no compati the world. It makes cocaine look like

542
00:30:08,000 --> 00:30:11,400
Speaker 1: what we do it comparatively giving the shame that the

543
00:30:11,560 --> 00:30:15,600
Speaker 1: same ship happens. Cocaine take yours, Damn you lose everything,

544
00:30:15,800 --> 00:30:19,120
Speaker 1: just like heroin. Cocaine is just you mean users or

545
00:30:19,160 --> 00:30:23,480
Speaker 1: sell users, showers and everybody else, everybody that showed cocaine.

546
00:30:23,720 --> 00:30:25,920
Speaker 1: If they showed cocaine and got away with it from

547
00:30:26,000 --> 00:30:29,240
Speaker 1: ten years and went to prison or did whatever. When

548
00:30:29,320 --> 00:30:32,600
Speaker 1: they come home, they don't have ship, they don't have nothing.

549
00:30:32,920 --> 00:30:35,240
Speaker 1: Someone fuckers showed dope all their life right now in

550
00:30:35,280 --> 00:30:38,640
Speaker 1: the day and they ain't got bailin, got nothing. But

551
00:30:38,960 --> 00:30:41,640
Speaker 1: but it's it's well, it ain't. It certainly isn't because

552
00:30:41,760 --> 00:30:45,480
Speaker 1: there's no money in the business. It is because it's

553
00:30:45,520 --> 00:30:49,680
Speaker 1: because people do not have any sort of financial education.

554
00:30:50,840 --> 00:30:52,720
Speaker 1: That's that's what it is. It doesn't matter what you

555
00:30:52,800 --> 00:30:54,600
Speaker 1: give them. You know, my uncle, the leader of our

556
00:30:54,680 --> 00:30:56,800
Speaker 1: family man, this guy used to tell me. You said

557
00:30:56,880 --> 00:31:00,360
Speaker 1: you took every dollar and you distributed it evenly across

558
00:31:00,400 --> 00:31:04,280
Speaker 1: the planet to every man, woman, child, make its way

559
00:31:04,360 --> 00:31:09,280
Speaker 1: back to its original owners. People are in the condition

560
00:31:09,320 --> 00:31:12,240
Speaker 1: they're inn because they don't know anymore to do any better.

561
00:31:13,200 --> 00:31:15,040
Speaker 1: And what you currently know can only take you as

562
00:31:15,080 --> 00:31:19,920
Speaker 1: far as it's taken you. Yes, so let's go back

563
00:31:19,960 --> 00:31:23,040
Speaker 1: to my question. Man who was the first person off

564
00:31:23,080 --> 00:31:25,040
Speaker 1: the boat, man who jumped out the car first as

565
00:31:25,080 --> 00:31:26,880
Speaker 1: far as the hustler man and said, this is gonna

566
00:31:26,880 --> 00:31:29,240
Speaker 1: be our family trade. We're gonna do it, We're gonna

567
00:31:29,240 --> 00:31:31,600
Speaker 1: do it well. And we go do it efficient my

568
00:31:31,760 --> 00:31:38,520
Speaker 1: mother and my uncle's um. To my knowledge, it was

569
00:31:38,600 --> 00:31:41,560
Speaker 1: just something you guys did. So you just County, just

570
00:31:41,640 --> 00:31:43,440
Speaker 1: woke up, count like I said, like the guys that

571
00:31:43,640 --> 00:31:46,920
Speaker 1: may own a restaurant, a family restaurant, or have a business.

572
00:31:47,000 --> 00:31:49,480
Speaker 1: It's just it's kind of something that you just adapted

573
00:31:49,520 --> 00:31:54,240
Speaker 1: to naturally. So if if they had, then I said

574
00:31:54,240 --> 00:31:56,920
Speaker 1: this in in my book, you know, Amazed by Wolves.

575
00:31:56,960 --> 00:31:59,320
Speaker 1: I said that if they had been locksmiths, I would

576
00:31:59,320 --> 00:32:02,400
Speaker 1: have been a locksmith. Now how I would have adapted

577
00:32:02,880 --> 00:32:06,440
Speaker 1: the skills and the teachers that they gave me. You know,

578
00:32:07,080 --> 00:32:08,600
Speaker 1: it could have went anyway, but it would have been

579
00:32:08,640 --> 00:32:11,120
Speaker 1: around that, right. So if I was a guy that

580
00:32:11,280 --> 00:32:16,840
Speaker 1: sold people the plans or how you circumvent all lock systems,

581
00:32:17,480 --> 00:32:20,200
Speaker 1: then you know that might have been an advent of

582
00:32:20,480 --> 00:32:25,400
Speaker 1: my generational or or neighborhood influence or whatever you know.

583
00:32:25,720 --> 00:32:28,600
Speaker 1: So they could have been legitimate locksmith, real quick man,

584
00:32:28,800 --> 00:32:36,320
Speaker 1: hold up, real quil we almost run. You call that

585
00:32:36,360 --> 00:32:40,400
Speaker 1: a gainst by natures and not my children. No, I

586
00:32:40,480 --> 00:32:43,760
Speaker 1: thought the whole world was like my world, bro, the

587
00:32:43,760 --> 00:32:46,280
Speaker 1: whole world where I was totally underfites society, and I

588
00:32:46,360 --> 00:32:54,640
Speaker 1: did not know it quick man. Hold on, we go

589
00:32:54,760 --> 00:32:58,520
Speaker 1: back in this netfleicks. Let me pull it up that

590
00:32:58,720 --> 00:33:01,160
Speaker 1: really we ganges that on to that, to the to

591
00:33:01,320 --> 00:33:04,120
Speaker 1: the well. They want us to start doing a different

592
00:33:04,120 --> 00:33:06,480
Speaker 1: together like they wanted, like you know within the show

593
00:33:06,520 --> 00:33:09,080
Speaker 1: instead is being cut in. We were doing that. We

594
00:33:09,240 --> 00:33:16,200
Speaker 1: do the thing now, well we didn't go do it

595
00:33:16,320 --> 00:33:20,720
Speaker 1: right right now? What is that you're talking about? It's

596
00:33:20,720 --> 00:33:24,520
Speaker 1: a read, it's a commercial. Oh, I need the money man.

597
00:33:24,560 --> 00:33:27,200
Speaker 1: You got to get got to get the money man. Yeah,

598
00:33:27,280 --> 00:33:32,320
Speaker 1: let me see that. I need something that that catch

599
00:33:32,400 --> 00:33:34,959
Speaker 1: my attention. I need something good to read. All right,

600
00:33:35,840 --> 00:33:38,840
Speaker 1: try this on. This is my newest book, my fourth book.

601
00:33:39,920 --> 00:33:43,840
Speaker 1: And you remember how A We's saying that I engage

602
00:33:43,880 --> 00:33:45,920
Speaker 1: with the books that I read. I write like I

603
00:33:46,040 --> 00:33:48,160
Speaker 1: read it, And what if I think about it or

604
00:33:48,200 --> 00:33:50,520
Speaker 1: feel about it, I write about it. I write my

605
00:33:50,560 --> 00:33:53,080
Speaker 1: thoughts about it, or I righted itself or whatever. That

606
00:33:53,280 --> 00:33:54,760
Speaker 1: had a lot to do with me being able to

607
00:33:54,800 --> 00:33:58,800
Speaker 1: assimilate and and incorporate the information, not just be aware

608
00:33:58,800 --> 00:34:00,840
Speaker 1: of it and be able to get check it, gurgetated

609
00:34:00,960 --> 00:34:03,640
Speaker 1: or you know whatever, you know, like to really become

610
00:34:03,680 --> 00:34:05,760
Speaker 1: it right like I had become all the information I

611
00:34:05,800 --> 00:34:09,000
Speaker 1: had gotten before that from wherever the fun it came from. Right,

612
00:34:09,440 --> 00:34:14,040
Speaker 1: So this is something that I created after um I

613
00:34:14,360 --> 00:34:16,560
Speaker 1: started teaching in South Carolina and in the prisons out

614
00:34:16,600 --> 00:34:18,319
Speaker 1: there after they had that riot when the seven brothers

615
00:34:18,400 --> 00:34:21,080
Speaker 1: got murdered back in two dollar eight team, And so

616
00:34:22,600 --> 00:34:27,200
Speaker 1: I was teaching violent offenders in maximum security prisons how

617
00:34:27,239 --> 00:34:30,920
Speaker 1: to think critically, because if I were able to get

618
00:34:30,960 --> 00:34:34,319
Speaker 1: through seventeen and a half years of blood mutton ship

619
00:34:34,840 --> 00:34:38,000
Speaker 1: and walk away a lot healthy, pin functional, then there

620
00:34:38,120 --> 00:34:40,960
Speaker 1: must be something. It wasn't the fact I carried two

621
00:34:41,000 --> 00:34:43,719
Speaker 1: guns everything I never wanted. I would say, Man, it's

622
00:34:43,719 --> 00:34:45,800
Speaker 1: a good thing I had my guns. Only that never happened.

623
00:34:45,840 --> 00:34:48,319
Speaker 1: My guns never saved me. They were there, but there

624
00:34:48,360 --> 00:34:52,160
Speaker 1: were a tool. And you know, every job don't call

625
00:34:52,280 --> 00:34:56,080
Speaker 1: for Himmer. Most jobs don't call for him in that game, right,

626
00:34:56,520 --> 00:35:00,719
Speaker 1: So you know, um I felt that if if I

627
00:35:00,920 --> 00:35:05,239
Speaker 1: could create a system like you said that they could

628
00:35:05,320 --> 00:35:09,520
Speaker 1: relate to and it not put too much of an

629
00:35:09,560 --> 00:35:14,360
Speaker 1: imposition on their attention and their time, they could slowly

630
00:35:14,719 --> 00:35:18,200
Speaker 1: get into it and start to see how having information

631
00:35:18,320 --> 00:35:21,840
Speaker 1: being information would be useful. So this is what I

632
00:35:21,880 --> 00:35:25,000
Speaker 1: came up with. So these are fifty of my quotes, right,

633
00:35:25,080 --> 00:35:28,080
Speaker 1: These are fifty of my quotes, And I write the quote,

634
00:35:28,239 --> 00:35:31,600
Speaker 1: then I write the elaboration, basically the explanation of what

635
00:35:31,719 --> 00:35:34,320
Speaker 1: it is I'm I'm intending to convey with this quote.

636
00:35:35,000 --> 00:35:38,200
Speaker 1: And the quotes come from my life experiences. They come

637
00:35:38,320 --> 00:35:42,920
Speaker 1: from me being around my elders and constantly being in

638
00:35:43,120 --> 00:35:46,520
Speaker 1: class and being expected to retain the information that they

639
00:35:46,560 --> 00:35:50,480
Speaker 1: were giving me. So I'm talking about at like six seven,

640
00:35:50,640 --> 00:35:55,719
Speaker 1: eight ninety these this, I'm being taught the tenants of gangsters, right,

641
00:35:56,360 --> 00:36:01,440
Speaker 1: So um, I'm expected to be able to respond to

642
00:36:01,480 --> 00:36:03,719
Speaker 1: certain ships in a in a way that says you've

643
00:36:03,719 --> 00:36:06,120
Speaker 1: been paying attention. And it was a lot to keep

644
00:36:06,160 --> 00:36:09,000
Speaker 1: track of. And you know, there are no more dysfunctional

645
00:36:09,040 --> 00:36:14,040
Speaker 1: motherfuckers than gagses but forever so there their their inappropriateness

646
00:36:14,080 --> 00:36:18,000
Speaker 1: had no limits. You know, I'm a five year ol

647
00:36:18,040 --> 00:36:19,880
Speaker 1: kids six year old kids. And then after I response,

648
00:36:19,960 --> 00:36:22,160
Speaker 1: and motherfuckers are talking to me like I'm a midget

649
00:36:22,280 --> 00:36:27,680
Speaker 1: or something. Organize I'm a child, right, So um, I

650
00:36:27,880 --> 00:36:32,920
Speaker 1: am trying to keep track of these lessons, you know,

651
00:36:33,400 --> 00:36:37,400
Speaker 1: and I just as a response and wanting so badly

652
00:36:37,920 --> 00:36:42,200
Speaker 1: to belong I created a system where they would say

653
00:36:42,239 --> 00:36:44,120
Speaker 1: something to me and I would take an in turn

654
00:36:44,160 --> 00:36:50,400
Speaker 1: into something rhythmic, you know, and short to basically like

655
00:36:50,520 --> 00:36:54,040
Speaker 1: put a pin in that. So whenever I found myself

656
00:36:54,120 --> 00:36:57,560
Speaker 1: in a situation where, you know, something like this piece

657
00:36:57,600 --> 00:36:59,440
Speaker 1: of information, a piece information that I got from them

658
00:36:59,480 --> 00:37:03,680
Speaker 1: would be useful, my subconscious automatically access that quote and

659
00:37:03,760 --> 00:37:06,360
Speaker 1: then it was like boom, hit the quote and boom,

660
00:37:07,120 --> 00:37:09,960
Speaker 1: this is what you do. I didn't recognize that that

661
00:37:10,120 --> 00:37:13,080
Speaker 1: was happening. I didn't recognize that was happening until I

662
00:37:13,120 --> 00:37:17,480
Speaker 1: started immersing myself in psychology and Babel science. So you

663
00:37:17,560 --> 00:37:21,800
Speaker 1: just evolved. That's what I evolved to the understanding of

664
00:37:21,960 --> 00:37:25,960
Speaker 1: how we work. You know what I'm saying, So much

665
00:37:26,000 --> 00:37:28,120
Speaker 1: of what we do is not what we think of

666
00:37:28,239 --> 00:37:31,160
Speaker 1: this consciously get there, I mean, so do me if

667
00:37:31,200 --> 00:37:32,680
Speaker 1: this is something I do. When I introduce this book

668
00:37:32,719 --> 00:37:37,160
Speaker 1: to people, I say, open it. Just arbitrarily, spick a

669
00:37:37,200 --> 00:37:38,719
Speaker 1: space and just open up and see what court it

670
00:37:38,760 --> 00:37:48,080
Speaker 1: opens up. To me, it's it's it's the Ganges prerogative.

671
00:37:48,120 --> 00:37:54,640
Speaker 1: The hottest hand, the path of least resistance usually leads

672
00:37:54,680 --> 00:38:01,200
Speaker 1: to the point of most regrets deep right, So when

673
00:38:01,320 --> 00:38:04,920
Speaker 1: somebody reads that, the purpose of that other page opposite

674
00:38:05,200 --> 00:38:07,840
Speaker 1: is for them to you know, of course you you

675
00:38:07,880 --> 00:38:10,279
Speaker 1: can either read my elaboration when I intended for to

676
00:38:10,360 --> 00:38:13,759
Speaker 1: be conveyed, or you can make your own and then

677
00:38:13,880 --> 00:38:17,640
Speaker 1: compare yours to mine, and you know, kind of learn

678
00:38:18,000 --> 00:38:21,600
Speaker 1: from You know what you're being exposed to, how it's

679
00:38:21,640 --> 00:38:26,600
Speaker 1: impacting you, and you know how to incorporate some more

680
00:38:26,680 --> 00:38:29,480
Speaker 1: of this, you know, understanding that's didn't being exposed to.

681
00:38:30,000 --> 00:38:32,160
Speaker 1: And but they don't know, they don't know that that's

682
00:38:32,200 --> 00:38:34,600
Speaker 1: what's happening, because I didn't know that's what was happening

683
00:38:34,840 --> 00:38:36,960
Speaker 1: until one day I heard myself responded to somebody in

684
00:38:37,040 --> 00:38:38,480
Speaker 1: the way that I was like, who the fund is

685
00:38:38,520 --> 00:38:40,799
Speaker 1: that that? Where that come from? I don't know where

686
00:38:40,800 --> 00:38:43,600
Speaker 1: that came from? And I recognized that was what I

687
00:38:43,719 --> 00:38:47,200
Speaker 1: was doing. And that's that's what you do in school.

688
00:38:47,200 --> 00:38:48,640
Speaker 1: The only thing is they give you what they want

689
00:38:48,680 --> 00:38:50,080
Speaker 1: you to know to make sure that you're a good

690
00:38:50,160 --> 00:38:53,120
Speaker 1: assimilated worker and not somebody's gonna be a critical thinker

691
00:38:53,520 --> 00:38:59,239
Speaker 1: and operate autonomously to the system. Right exactly, Well, you

692
00:38:59,320 --> 00:39:01,279
Speaker 1: know what I wanted take this time, a real quick

693
00:39:01,320 --> 00:39:02,839
Speaker 1: man to give a shout out to our boy Ray

694
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695
00:39:06,760 --> 00:39:10,320
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696
00:39:10,520 --> 00:39:12,600
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697
00:39:12,600 --> 00:39:15,160
Speaker 1: working from home, are you working on your fitness? Man,

698
00:39:15,320 --> 00:39:17,239
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699
00:39:17,360 --> 00:39:20,759
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700
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706
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Speaker 1: You know, I'm not talking about the beats by the

707
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716
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719
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721
00:40:16,880 --> 00:40:19,440
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722
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Speaker 1: need to pick up a pen and see what the

723
00:40:20,719 --> 00:40:23,279
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724
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731
00:40:43,719 --> 00:40:45,439
Speaker 1: you and he gonna funk you up if you don't

732
00:40:45,440 --> 00:40:52,920
Speaker 1: put them on. All right, but flawless. By the way, Man,

733
00:40:54,680 --> 00:40:56,359
Speaker 1: after a while, you get you you know what I'm saying,

734
00:40:56,360 --> 00:40:58,960
Speaker 1: You get used to it because you know that at

735
00:40:59,000 --> 00:41:02,400
Speaker 1: that with you practice. Yeah, exactly, That's really what everything

736
00:41:02,440 --> 00:41:06,320
Speaker 1: we're talking about. Man, I just I need helping and

737
00:41:07,440 --> 00:41:11,600
Speaker 1: I'm just so used to talking street. I'm so used

738
00:41:11,600 --> 00:41:17,480
Speaker 1: to understanding only that. But I try to identify with

739
00:41:17,880 --> 00:41:21,120
Speaker 1: how you talk and listen and I'm absorbing it. But

740
00:41:21,920 --> 00:41:25,160
Speaker 1: and I get what you're saying, but I just can't.

741
00:41:26,760 --> 00:41:29,919
Speaker 1: I'm gonna tell you that this point that I wanted

742
00:41:30,040 --> 00:41:35,840
Speaker 1: to fish before, speak to that. Right, if you practice

743
00:41:36,360 --> 00:41:40,520
Speaker 1: any behavior, you become better at that behavior. When people

744
00:41:40,600 --> 00:41:44,959
Speaker 1: improving things typically adds to their sense of worth, which

745
00:41:45,040 --> 00:41:47,120
Speaker 1: makes them more inclined to do it, because that's what

746
00:41:47,360 --> 00:41:52,120
Speaker 1: ultimately drives human beings, a sense of value, validation exactly.

747
00:41:52,160 --> 00:41:55,080
Speaker 1: And a lot of times when we improve upon those areas,

748
00:41:55,239 --> 00:41:57,680
Speaker 1: we actually don't know. It's because I tell James all

749
00:41:57,719 --> 00:41:59,960
Speaker 1: the time. I go back and I'm listened to the

750
00:42:00,160 --> 00:42:04,000
Speaker 1: earlier episodes, right, and I laugh. You don't have a thing, man,

751
00:42:04,040 --> 00:42:05,920
Speaker 1: I said, Look, listen to James May. I don't want

752
00:42:05,960 --> 00:42:08,400
Speaker 1: to talk. He's not saying a word. But I see this.

753
00:42:08,600 --> 00:42:10,480
Speaker 1: You know, I've seen him go from the point of

754
00:42:10,560 --> 00:42:13,120
Speaker 1: doing that to actually put off episodes by itself, and

755
00:42:13,360 --> 00:42:16,879
Speaker 1: some of our best performing episodes. So you do pick

756
00:42:16,960 --> 00:42:20,920
Speaker 1: up that stuff. I was. I was so gang bangage.

757
00:42:21,760 --> 00:42:26,400
Speaker 1: I couldn't write no other way but in gang writing. Uh,

758
00:42:28,360 --> 00:42:31,640
Speaker 1: I got just got a quick story. I remem death

759
00:42:31,760 --> 00:42:35,320
Speaker 1: Row at the office and we got that exotic cars

760
00:42:35,320 --> 00:42:37,040
Speaker 1: and all kind of ship. Right, So we had the

761
00:42:37,120 --> 00:42:41,240
Speaker 1: office phone ring, pick up the phone and I'm writing,

762
00:42:42,480 --> 00:42:46,360
Speaker 1: you know, a message. So I'm so the dude come in.

763
00:42:46,480 --> 00:42:48,600
Speaker 1: I said, you you got a message here? So he

764
00:42:48,719 --> 00:42:53,160
Speaker 1: look what the fund is this hitting up? Like like

765
00:42:53,719 --> 00:42:56,440
Speaker 1: that's all I knew, my couragey, I didn't do noneing.

766
00:42:56,840 --> 00:42:59,759
Speaker 1: I had to actually sit down and get myself back

767
00:42:59,840 --> 00:43:02,520
Speaker 1: to it, like writing. You know what I'm saying. I

768
00:43:02,680 --> 00:43:06,120
Speaker 1: was just so far into being a gang member, a

769
00:43:06,200 --> 00:43:10,320
Speaker 1: proficient game member. For me, it was a graffiti graffiti

770
00:43:10,320 --> 00:43:14,880
Speaker 1: in the seventies, right and and bro like you couldn't

771
00:43:15,080 --> 00:43:16,920
Speaker 1: make out anything or what I was writing, like a

772
00:43:17,080 --> 00:43:20,319
Speaker 1: schoolwork was already graffiti, and I like to write. That's

773
00:43:20,320 --> 00:43:23,040
Speaker 1: why I was when I first referenced my my book

774
00:43:23,080 --> 00:43:27,920
Speaker 1: and my intro and I asked about the writing thing,

775
00:43:28,200 --> 00:43:31,719
Speaker 1: you know, um, something about you know, the like how

776
00:43:31,800 --> 00:43:34,400
Speaker 1: did I become you asked about the journalism thing, and

777
00:43:34,480 --> 00:43:37,160
Speaker 1: basically became profision and the writing or whatever. Happy. But

778
00:43:37,600 --> 00:43:39,640
Speaker 1: I always had an attraction to write. I was one

779
00:43:39,680 --> 00:43:40,920
Speaker 1: of those kids with the teachers that we got the

780
00:43:40,920 --> 00:43:42,720
Speaker 1: writing side of day and I'd be like yeah. Everybody

781
00:43:42,840 --> 00:43:44,800
Speaker 1: was like oh, and I never understood why. But I

782
00:43:44,800 --> 00:43:49,640
Speaker 1: didn't understand that there feelings about things were different from

783
00:43:49,680 --> 00:43:55,320
Speaker 1: my feelings about things. Right, So, um, I always always

784
00:43:55,440 --> 00:43:59,400
Speaker 1: liked writing. And when I began writing this as my journal,

785
00:44:00,600 --> 00:44:04,080
Speaker 1: I began with my earliest memory, right whatever, my earliest

786
00:44:04,120 --> 00:44:06,080
Speaker 1: memories were. So it's just random things I remembers. I

787
00:44:06,160 --> 00:44:08,440
Speaker 1: was just writing them, just writing different And I wrote

788
00:44:08,600 --> 00:44:11,320
Speaker 1: about when my first grade teacher told me that I

789
00:44:11,400 --> 00:44:14,480
Speaker 1: could be a writer, and I totally forgotten to bud

790
00:44:14,560 --> 00:44:17,760
Speaker 1: it into That was first grade, so holy in first grade.

791
00:44:20,440 --> 00:44:23,719
Speaker 1: First grade. So I was five in the first grade, right, um,

792
00:44:24,120 --> 00:44:27,799
Speaker 1: twenty five years later, I remember that I hadn't thought

793
00:44:27,840 --> 00:44:30,120
Speaker 1: about that ever at all. I remember that when I

794
00:44:30,200 --> 00:44:33,160
Speaker 1: was sitting there writing, figuring out my life, where I'm

795
00:44:33,160 --> 00:44:36,080
Speaker 1: going in this beginning, at the beginning for myself and

796
00:44:36,600 --> 00:44:40,560
Speaker 1: I'm writing about this period in my life and this

797
00:44:40,880 --> 00:44:43,840
Speaker 1: comes out of me without me having a conscious recall

798
00:44:43,960 --> 00:44:46,239
Speaker 1: of it. It's just that's what I'm saying, that writing,

799
00:44:46,280 --> 00:44:49,720
Speaker 1: the psycho neural muscular activity, this ship, it was just happening.

800
00:44:50,000 --> 00:44:52,000
Speaker 1: It's just coming out things that I had forgotten, should

801
00:44:52,040 --> 00:44:54,320
Speaker 1: I had subverted. We had a lot of ship, you know.

802
00:44:54,320 --> 00:44:57,800
Speaker 1: I mean anything that goes against the preferred narrative we

803
00:44:57,880 --> 00:45:00,479
Speaker 1: have of ourselves, whether it's be bad, or be tough,

804
00:45:01,000 --> 00:45:03,640
Speaker 1: or we kind anything that does not fit in that

805
00:45:03,800 --> 00:45:07,279
Speaker 1: narrative that actually happens in real life. We over time

806
00:45:07,400 --> 00:45:11,200
Speaker 1: will rewrite that or completely erase that ship from our

807
00:45:11,239 --> 00:45:14,840
Speaker 1: conscious mind. That's how we as human beings, as mammals,

808
00:45:14,920 --> 00:45:20,719
Speaker 1: that's how we basically survived, would be we couldn't do that. Yes,

809
00:45:20,840 --> 00:45:24,080
Speaker 1: natural adaptation, you know you selectively just come times, just

810
00:45:24,400 --> 00:45:27,600
Speaker 1: stuff in your memory. Just you ever noticed that cognitive

811
00:45:27,640 --> 00:45:29,719
Speaker 1: this will go crazy? Yeah? You ever noticed when you

812
00:45:29,800 --> 00:45:32,200
Speaker 1: go back home sometimes you'll go back to certain places

813
00:45:32,239 --> 00:45:34,640
Speaker 1: and to bring you to a point. I remember, man,

814
00:45:34,719 --> 00:45:36,799
Speaker 1: I had this dude. It was a dude. Leon. Leon

815
00:45:36,960 --> 00:45:38,920
Speaker 1: was about man. You remember, they wouldn't they would hold

816
00:45:38,960 --> 00:45:41,320
Speaker 1: people back in high school back in our day. This

817
00:45:41,440 --> 00:45:45,040
Speaker 1: dude was actually about likeab eighteen years old and we

818
00:45:45,160 --> 00:45:47,440
Speaker 1: were liking seventh grade or something like that. But he

819
00:45:47,520 --> 00:45:49,239
Speaker 1: was a grown as man sitting at the desk for

820
00:45:49,360 --> 00:45:52,480
Speaker 1: being stuff with big Swoll. Motherfucking man. I remember that dude, Man,

821
00:45:53,160 --> 00:45:56,640
Speaker 1: he would punk everybody. He was. Man, he was my

822
00:45:56,760 --> 00:46:03,160
Speaker 1: eighth grade he was eighteen, you know, called me quick, motherfucker,

823
00:46:03,280 --> 00:46:05,959
Speaker 1: come on and hang out with me. And he probably

824
00:46:05,960 --> 00:46:09,040
Speaker 1: been over there with you button. I remember, Man, its

825
00:46:10,040 --> 00:46:12,719
Speaker 1: seven grade, eighteen years old. I guess his mama said,

826
00:46:13,280 --> 00:46:15,000
Speaker 1: so you stopping to school? You getting that out of here?

827
00:46:15,160 --> 00:46:18,399
Speaker 1: I remember, man. Anyway, I was walking past this liquor store.

828
00:46:18,400 --> 00:46:20,279
Speaker 1: I was back at the house, right, and I was

829
00:46:20,440 --> 00:46:22,520
Speaker 1: back walking past. You know, the little hood story has

830
00:46:22,560 --> 00:46:25,160
Speaker 1: been there forever, right, same dude, still working in everything.

831
00:46:25,880 --> 00:46:30,360
Speaker 1: I remember walking past there. That dude Leon had embarrassed

832
00:46:30,400 --> 00:46:32,160
Speaker 1: me that day in school. Man, I was talking to

833
00:46:32,200 --> 00:46:35,800
Speaker 1: this chicken shell Morrigan and he just came past me

834
00:46:35,880 --> 00:46:37,760
Speaker 1: and slapped the shell of me, like from the side.

835
00:46:37,960 --> 00:46:41,000
Speaker 1: And I was so mad, man, And so I thought

836
00:46:41,040 --> 00:46:42,920
Speaker 1: about that the whole day. I said, I'm gonna get

837
00:46:42,960 --> 00:46:46,279
Speaker 1: this motherfucker, because you know, you get embarrassed. I had

838
00:46:46,320 --> 00:46:49,520
Speaker 1: a lunch box, and I remember, man, I saw him

839
00:46:49,560 --> 00:46:53,439
Speaker 1: out there smoking weed in his little weeds outside the store,

840
00:46:53,440 --> 00:46:55,279
Speaker 1: and I went to cracked his ass and helped my

841
00:46:55,400 --> 00:47:00,560
Speaker 1: lunch box, and everybody kind of paused, and that motherfucker

842
00:47:00,640 --> 00:47:03,600
Speaker 1: did like this and blood square if we're out his head.

843
00:47:04,080 --> 00:47:06,600
Speaker 1: And then it's like, man, every kid in the neighborhood

844
00:47:06,760 --> 00:47:09,200
Speaker 1: just started piling on this motherfucker's once they saw me

845
00:47:09,320 --> 00:47:12,959
Speaker 1: take off on him. Yeah, everybody started just started taking

846
00:47:13,000 --> 00:47:14,640
Speaker 1: off on his ass. And I was walking by the

847
00:47:14,719 --> 00:47:16,520
Speaker 1: store and I remembered that, and I hadn't thought about

848
00:47:16,560 --> 00:47:17,759
Speaker 1: that in years, and I was like, this is what

849
00:47:18,200 --> 00:47:20,799
Speaker 1: Leon's asked that that day, and it wasn't more asked.

850
00:47:20,800 --> 00:47:26,600
Speaker 1: What was after that? Why do you think you remember

851
00:47:27,200 --> 00:47:32,120
Speaker 1: Michelle's first and last name? Because Michelle lived behind me,

852
00:47:32,280 --> 00:47:34,880
Speaker 1: Like you know, we got our backyard is right here

853
00:47:34,920 --> 00:47:37,680
Speaker 1: in her backyard was right there, and we would sit

854
00:47:37,760 --> 00:47:39,719
Speaker 1: on top of the garage and talk to each other

855
00:47:40,200 --> 00:47:44,799
Speaker 1: all the time. Yeah, and that was my home, independent school. Yeah,

856
00:47:45,239 --> 00:47:47,000
Speaker 1: it turned out to be I should think things. I

857
00:47:47,120 --> 00:47:48,560
Speaker 1: liked it, But she turned out to be just a

858
00:47:48,640 --> 00:47:50,520
Speaker 1: really good friend of mine. A girl that's a friend

859
00:47:50,560 --> 00:47:51,960
Speaker 1: of you know, a friend of mine. On this day,

860
00:47:51,960 --> 00:47:53,960
Speaker 1: she hit me on Facebook. She married at the homie

861
00:47:54,280 --> 00:47:56,480
Speaker 1: and they got kids and stuff, and we you know,

862
00:47:56,560 --> 00:47:58,480
Speaker 1: we're friends, but you know, you think you gotta crush

863
00:47:58,520 --> 00:48:00,640
Speaker 1: on somebody, and she's like, no, you're my friend. I

864
00:48:00,719 --> 00:48:02,160
Speaker 1: can't you know what I mean. I got put in

865
00:48:02,200 --> 00:48:03,759
Speaker 1: the friends on real quick, you know what I mean.

866
00:48:03,920 --> 00:48:07,440
Speaker 1: So so we just became friends, man. And she was

867
00:48:07,560 --> 00:48:09,319
Speaker 1: just real cool people, you know what I mean. She's

868
00:48:09,360 --> 00:48:12,560
Speaker 1: just real cool people. Man. And uh, it's funny man,

869
00:48:12,800 --> 00:48:15,480
Speaker 1: that the human mind is something else. Man. And it's

870
00:48:15,560 --> 00:48:19,960
Speaker 1: like I've had a big educational psychology man, just as

871
00:48:20,000 --> 00:48:23,160
Speaker 1: far as doing this, man. And uh, that's one of

872
00:48:23,280 --> 00:48:25,080
Speaker 1: my gifts is to be able to just deal with

873
00:48:25,239 --> 00:48:27,800
Speaker 1: people on where they're at. I never get mad, I

874
00:48:27,880 --> 00:48:32,959
Speaker 1: get upset idea what people where they are? You have empathy? Yeah,

875
00:48:33,320 --> 00:48:37,120
Speaker 1: only empathy can give you that. You have to train

876
00:48:37,160 --> 00:48:39,640
Speaker 1: in the world. You can't replace empathy. You have to

877
00:48:39,719 --> 00:48:43,279
Speaker 1: have empathy, though, man, because there are some people they

878
00:48:43,400 --> 00:48:45,520
Speaker 1: just are who they are. Man. And I'm gonna tell

879
00:48:45,560 --> 00:48:47,560
Speaker 1: you once somebody, I think it's the age by the

880
00:48:47,640 --> 00:48:51,040
Speaker 1: time you or thirty, dude, whoever you are, you can change,

881
00:48:51,120 --> 00:48:53,399
Speaker 1: don't get me wrong, but you can evolve and grow.

882
00:48:53,880 --> 00:48:56,680
Speaker 1: You can evolve and grow. We can change. But if

883
00:48:56,719 --> 00:48:59,600
Speaker 1: we evolve and grow, then what the world knows of

884
00:48:59,760 --> 00:49:04,080
Speaker 1: us as us changes. Because I'm I'm still the same person.

885
00:49:05,000 --> 00:49:07,680
Speaker 1: I'm still the same person. I've just evolved to a

886
00:49:07,760 --> 00:49:12,880
Speaker 1: person who I sold many more options and recourse that

887
00:49:13,480 --> 00:49:16,720
Speaker 1: I don't have to like the hammer is the last

888
00:49:17,040 --> 00:49:19,920
Speaker 1: thing I think about. Well, but that's the thing man,

889
00:49:19,960 --> 00:49:24,000
Speaker 1: And I noticed man by me always being physically bigger

890
00:49:24,000 --> 00:49:26,960
Speaker 1: than everybody. I learned very quickly. Man. You know that

891
00:49:26,960 --> 00:49:28,640
Speaker 1: I could go out there and squad, but motherfuck up.

892
00:49:29,120 --> 00:49:31,440
Speaker 1: But I had friends that was my size, that was

893
00:49:31,520 --> 00:49:33,880
Speaker 1: playing that bully ship that was getting gunned down. So

894
00:49:34,600 --> 00:49:38,280
Speaker 1: I learned to be more of um. Now I wouldn't

895
00:49:38,280 --> 00:49:40,520
Speaker 1: back down from the ship. If mother want to knuckle up,

896
00:49:40,520 --> 00:49:42,840
Speaker 1: we can knuckle up. But I would rather be the

897
00:49:42,920 --> 00:49:45,600
Speaker 1: type to talk out, you know, like, you know, hey, man,

898
00:49:46,200 --> 00:49:48,319
Speaker 1: what's going on, Like what's the problem. Let's let's find

899
00:49:48,360 --> 00:49:49,960
Speaker 1: out what the problem is. That we gotta fight. We

900
00:49:50,040 --> 00:49:52,680
Speaker 1: gotta fight, but what's the problem. But I've learned, man,

901
00:49:52,800 --> 00:49:57,759
Speaker 1: that um people that are gangsters. Man I would rather

902
00:49:57,920 --> 00:50:01,600
Speaker 1: deal with them over of the so called civilized society

903
00:50:01,680 --> 00:50:04,640
Speaker 1: because one thing about a gangster, if he gives you

904
00:50:04,760 --> 00:50:07,840
Speaker 1: his word about something, that's what he's gonna do, and

905
00:50:07,920 --> 00:50:12,839
Speaker 1: he's gonna remain most most people like like they're true

906
00:50:12,880 --> 00:50:15,800
Speaker 1: to the nature of that thing you speak of exactly

907
00:50:15,920 --> 00:50:18,279
Speaker 1: all of those if they're true to it, man, their

908
00:50:18,320 --> 00:50:21,000
Speaker 1: word is gonna be their bond. Man. You can call

909
00:50:21,080 --> 00:50:23,359
Speaker 1: him at twelve o'clock at nights and if they're there,

910
00:50:23,360 --> 00:50:25,600
Speaker 1: they're gonna be there. And because because it's important for

911
00:50:25,680 --> 00:50:29,879
Speaker 1: them to carry on, to have their word, their word

912
00:50:30,000 --> 00:50:31,759
Speaker 1: is everything in their name is their name, you know

913
00:50:31,800 --> 00:50:34,560
Speaker 1: what I mean. So everything else is passing through a

914
00:50:34,640 --> 00:50:38,680
Speaker 1: borrowed That right there, that a stick with you. So

915
00:50:38,920 --> 00:50:41,239
Speaker 1: if your name is good, you can have it all,

916
00:50:41,640 --> 00:50:43,600
Speaker 1: lose it all, name, and get it back. But if

917
00:50:43,640 --> 00:50:46,399
Speaker 1: your name and you have it all, you lose it all.

918
00:50:47,000 --> 00:50:50,759
Speaker 1: You won't get no opportunity to get your ship back

919
00:50:50,760 --> 00:50:53,800
Speaker 1: because motherfucker's remembers your name exactly. And I try to

920
00:50:53,880 --> 00:50:58,839
Speaker 1: make it um even with me. I try to. It's

921
00:50:58,880 --> 00:51:02,719
Speaker 1: a thing with me. Yeah, I have a thing man

922
00:51:02,840 --> 00:51:08,640
Speaker 1: with um. Sometimes I like to manage people's expectations because

923
00:51:08,719 --> 00:51:11,040
Speaker 1: sometimes people would try to force you in position to

924
00:51:11,080 --> 00:51:13,040
Speaker 1: do something they want you to do, and they get

925
00:51:13,160 --> 00:51:15,400
Speaker 1: mad because I may not necessarily be biting for it.

926
00:51:15,520 --> 00:51:19,560
Speaker 1: But I've became very proficient that looking ahead of things,

927
00:51:19,600 --> 00:51:22,960
Speaker 1: that being kind of um kind of three steps, you know,

928
00:51:23,200 --> 00:51:26,239
Speaker 1: six or seven months down the line of where I see, yeah,

929
00:51:26,280 --> 00:51:28,160
Speaker 1: I can't do this right now because it's not gonna

930
00:51:28,200 --> 00:51:30,359
Speaker 1: turn out right. If it don't turn out right, nine

931
00:51:30,400 --> 00:51:31,719
Speaker 1: times the team you could be mad at me. So

932
00:51:32,040 --> 00:51:36,719
Speaker 1: let's wait until I'm in position. So when I give

933
00:51:36,719 --> 00:51:39,719
Speaker 1: you my word, it actually means something. You get what

934
00:51:39,800 --> 00:51:42,120
Speaker 1: I'm saying. So basically, don't let somebody put you in

935
00:51:42,160 --> 00:51:44,040
Speaker 1: the position where you're going to be where you can

936
00:51:44,080 --> 00:51:46,920
Speaker 1: potentially undermined when he hear something right now yea. And

937
00:51:47,000 --> 00:51:49,640
Speaker 1: they could never be put in a position to do

938
00:51:49,840 --> 00:51:53,280
Speaker 1: something when he don't want to do. That's only by choice.

939
00:51:54,080 --> 00:51:56,879
Speaker 1: If you choose to do that, then you accept all

940
00:51:56,960 --> 00:51:59,160
Speaker 1: the all the back ends and all of that other

941
00:51:59,280 --> 00:52:01,799
Speaker 1: ship that can win it. A man gonna be a man.

942
00:52:01,880 --> 00:52:04,920
Speaker 1: My grandfather told me, what you tell this man, and

943
00:52:05,000 --> 00:52:07,440
Speaker 1: what did you tell that man? Your word is everything.

944
00:52:07,840 --> 00:52:11,959
Speaker 1: By say I'm going to rolling with no problem. Nothing

945
00:52:11,960 --> 00:52:16,040
Speaker 1: else should be said. Don't have the questions. So that's

946
00:52:16,080 --> 00:52:18,359
Speaker 1: what you that's what we go off and we're seeing

947
00:52:18,400 --> 00:52:22,799
Speaker 1: the same thing. Brother, Everybody don't possess that. Everybody don't

948
00:52:22,920 --> 00:52:26,640
Speaker 1: understand that that's that's well. The thing is, we have

949
00:52:26,800 --> 00:52:30,360
Speaker 1: had experience enough at this point, beyond our developmental stuff

950
00:52:30,400 --> 00:52:35,760
Speaker 1: to know that, um, that is the majority of humans.

951
00:52:37,800 --> 00:52:40,239
Speaker 1: And I think a lot of us having what we

952
00:52:40,400 --> 00:52:43,080
Speaker 1: have the way that we do. Uh, those of us

953
00:52:43,160 --> 00:52:46,279
Speaker 1: that are of the thing that we are. I think

954
00:52:46,320 --> 00:52:48,239
Speaker 1: it has a lot to do with the fact that

955
00:52:48,320 --> 00:52:51,279
Speaker 1: we made to understand. The consequences for anything else are

956
00:52:51,480 --> 00:52:54,839
Speaker 1: extremely severe. Have you ever been put in a situation

957
00:52:55,880 --> 00:52:58,320
Speaker 1: that that made you want to go back or revert

958
00:52:58,800 --> 00:53:03,160
Speaker 1: to how you used to get down? Yeah? Oh yeah,

959
00:53:03,400 --> 00:53:05,839
Speaker 1: But like I said, the toolbox is much more full now.

960
00:53:06,120 --> 00:53:08,880
Speaker 1: When I first left the street and stumbled into this

961
00:53:09,000 --> 00:53:13,440
Speaker 1: don this don diva thing, um, I didn't. I had

962
00:53:13,440 --> 00:53:16,640
Speaker 1: a very naive perception of the world. Right, So I

963
00:53:16,800 --> 00:53:20,799
Speaker 1: thought that squares followed all the rules in their lives

964
00:53:20,840 --> 00:53:26,840
Speaker 1: are governed by rules, and right that's what I had

965
00:53:26,920 --> 00:53:29,160
Speaker 1: no clue. I had no clue because I never dealt

966
00:53:29,200 --> 00:53:31,520
Speaker 1: with them. I never interacted with them, so I didn't

967
00:53:31,560 --> 00:53:33,759
Speaker 1: have any clue. I didn't have no clue about that,

968
00:53:33,800 --> 00:53:35,680
Speaker 1: and it didn't matter to me, you know what I'm saying.

969
00:53:35,920 --> 00:53:38,440
Speaker 1: So at the point in which I got into the

970
00:53:38,600 --> 00:53:41,440
Speaker 1: space where I'm dealing with these people, UM, I have

971
00:53:41,560 --> 00:53:47,759
Speaker 1: these unrealistic expectations. Right, So I'm dealing with def JAM

972
00:53:48,200 --> 00:53:51,960
Speaker 1: or Universal or whatever the labels were back then or whatever, right,

973
00:53:52,600 --> 00:53:55,800
Speaker 1: and um we're doing this thirty net thing. So for

974
00:53:55,880 --> 00:53:57,480
Speaker 1: people who don't know thirty net and you're in the

975
00:53:57,560 --> 00:54:01,319
Speaker 1: magazine business, it's like, okay, the advertiser, your client, they

976
00:54:01,400 --> 00:54:05,560
Speaker 1: will um run and add in your publication, and thirty

977
00:54:05,640 --> 00:54:08,640
Speaker 1: days after that ad hits the market, they pay you

978
00:54:08,760 --> 00:54:13,000
Speaker 1: for it. Okay. So you know I'm I'm busting my

979
00:54:13,160 --> 00:54:16,520
Speaker 1: ass to get this thing, you know, going keeping going, right,

980
00:54:17,440 --> 00:54:21,120
Speaker 1: I'm writing under the twelve pseudonyms, right, so people don't

981
00:54:21,120 --> 00:54:23,919
Speaker 1: think it's as small as it is. And so when

982
00:54:23,960 --> 00:54:26,400
Speaker 1: it's time for me to get my money, you know,

983
00:54:26,560 --> 00:54:28,800
Speaker 1: old habits prevailed. I still want my money. When I

984
00:54:28,880 --> 00:54:30,440
Speaker 1: want my money, and I want my money was supposed

985
00:54:30,440 --> 00:54:33,080
Speaker 1: to show up because you told me that's what you do.

986
00:54:33,320 --> 00:54:35,800
Speaker 1: So I told you I would put the magazine, the

987
00:54:35,920 --> 00:54:37,840
Speaker 1: ad in this particular magazine, it would come out of

988
00:54:37,880 --> 00:54:40,840
Speaker 1: this particular time, and I did, and it did. I

989
00:54:40,960 --> 00:54:45,160
Speaker 1: did as we just said. I kept my word as expected,

990
00:54:46,120 --> 00:54:48,680
Speaker 1: especially for you squares, right, y'all follow all the rules, right,

991
00:54:48,760 --> 00:54:50,799
Speaker 1: So I did my part. So that check is as

992
00:54:50,840 --> 00:54:52,880
Speaker 1: good as in the mail. Thirty five days later, my

993
00:54:53,000 --> 00:54:58,799
Speaker 1: check ain't there. I'm like, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, up,

994
00:54:58,840 --> 00:55:02,720
Speaker 1: discivariy man, you when much check at bro every everything,

995
00:55:02,840 --> 00:55:05,480
Speaker 1: But no, where's my check at thirty five days? And

996
00:55:05,600 --> 00:55:09,200
Speaker 1: I knowing they're going, this motherfucker's crazy. What the fun like?

997
00:55:09,239 --> 00:55:11,600
Speaker 1: How you think that's I got no clear, no idea

998
00:55:11,640 --> 00:55:15,520
Speaker 1: how it works. I'm thinking, you guys do everything on time.

999
00:55:15,560 --> 00:55:17,319
Speaker 1: And right, I'm so glad I'm not in the street,

1000
00:55:17,360 --> 00:55:19,000
Speaker 1: no ball, I ain't gonna bust nobody in the head.

1001
00:55:19,040 --> 00:55:21,000
Speaker 1: And you know, trying to figure out my mother. You

1002
00:55:21,000 --> 00:55:22,919
Speaker 1: know that what this is the decent the nine thoughts

1003
00:55:22,920 --> 00:55:25,879
Speaker 1: I'm having. So I'm on the phone. It's like you're

1004
00:55:25,960 --> 00:55:29,160
Speaker 1: trying me. You've got millions of dollars, so you must

1005
00:55:29,200 --> 00:55:32,960
Speaker 1: be trying me. So my old instincts are let me,

1006
00:55:33,200 --> 00:55:35,360
Speaker 1: let me, let you know where the line is before

1007
00:55:35,400 --> 00:55:37,520
Speaker 1: you get a toll cross that motherfucking lose the leg.

1008
00:55:38,080 --> 00:55:41,200
Speaker 1: Let me let you know. And it took my man

1009
00:55:41,440 --> 00:55:46,640
Speaker 1: Jeff Dixon, who is responsible for ludicrous career from my hood,

1010
00:55:47,520 --> 00:55:50,040
Speaker 1: to tell me you gotta you gotta slow down. Here,

1011
00:55:50,120 --> 00:55:52,719
Speaker 1: you go down, it will black boil your ass. You

1012
00:55:52,760 --> 00:55:54,879
Speaker 1: know what I mean. I'm like, you know, I shoot straight,

1013
00:55:54,920 --> 00:55:58,760
Speaker 1: bro like. I don't bullshit nobody, and I've never accepted

1014
00:55:58,800 --> 00:56:01,040
Speaker 1: it from other people. I give to people what I

1015
00:56:01,160 --> 00:56:04,280
Speaker 1: want and I don't make no exceptions. And Princess the pulpous,

1016
00:56:04,400 --> 00:56:06,600
Speaker 1: I treat people like people. I treat them like I

1017
00:56:06,640 --> 00:56:10,000
Speaker 1: would want to be treated, period. So it took some

1018
00:56:10,719 --> 00:56:12,880
Speaker 1: you know one thing. Another thing about gangsters. Gangsters are

1019
00:56:13,160 --> 00:56:17,000
Speaker 1: very sensitive, Oh yeah, highly sin and I don't mean

1020
00:56:17,160 --> 00:56:20,400
Speaker 1: in a sissy fied way. I mean highly attuned to

1021
00:56:20,560 --> 00:56:24,520
Speaker 1: bullshit in the slightest degree. And those of us who

1022
00:56:24,560 --> 00:56:30,920
Speaker 1: are committed, we are very preemptive about bullshit. Minute in

1023
00:56:30,960 --> 00:56:34,520
Speaker 1: a second, save your fucking life, because you seem to

1024
00:56:34,600 --> 00:56:37,520
Speaker 1: be entertaining the idea of going down a dark path

1025
00:56:38,120 --> 00:56:40,239
Speaker 1: and changing the trajectory of both our lives. So let's

1026
00:56:40,280 --> 00:56:42,640
Speaker 1: not do that. Let me let you understand something right now,

1027
00:56:43,040 --> 00:56:45,759
Speaker 1: All the motherfucker's that you love. They love you too.

1028
00:56:46,320 --> 00:56:50,120
Speaker 1: Don't undervalue that ship. I'm committed. Are you committed? I'm

1029
00:56:50,160 --> 00:56:52,920
Speaker 1: ready to go. I live for you. That's what you want.

1030
00:56:53,040 --> 00:56:54,920
Speaker 1: You want me to live for you. I live for you.

1031
00:56:55,840 --> 00:56:59,520
Speaker 1: That kind of commitment has always been rare. We have

1032
00:56:59,760 --> 00:57:02,120
Speaker 1: all away. He's been rare, you know what I'm saying,

1033
00:57:02,239 --> 00:57:06,960
Speaker 1: Like for real, for real? You know, so this this

1034
00:57:07,200 --> 00:57:13,520
Speaker 1: whole thing about you know, everybody's gangster and everybody's a shooter,

1035
00:57:13,680 --> 00:57:18,280
Speaker 1: and this is mass insanity, bro, mass insanity. Ain't we

1036
00:57:18,400 --> 00:57:21,240
Speaker 1: in a month of the world that that particular genetic

1037
00:57:21,920 --> 00:57:27,160
Speaker 1: trait is suddenly everybody got it. The funk out here,

1038
00:57:27,720 --> 00:57:31,440
Speaker 1: everybody don't got it. Everybody is doing it. Everybody's doing

1039
00:57:32,080 --> 00:57:33,520
Speaker 1: and then when they got to deal with the consequences,

1040
00:57:33,520 --> 00:57:35,120
Speaker 1: that's when they've been oh wait a minute, that's that's

1041
00:57:35,160 --> 00:57:37,280
Speaker 1: actually not me. And you see it every day because

1042
00:57:37,320 --> 00:57:42,840
Speaker 1: they break down crime kid on on on Instagram. That

1043
00:57:42,920 --> 00:57:48,200
Speaker 1: one kid, he's about six four and he's standing there,

1044
00:57:48,640 --> 00:57:51,440
Speaker 1: you know what I mean, chest out and the judge

1045
00:57:51,480 --> 00:57:55,920
Speaker 1: that two years and he said, now your lord is

1046
00:57:56,000 --> 00:57:59,200
Speaker 1: standing in the same distance you standing from The judge

1047
00:57:59,360 --> 00:58:01,920
Speaker 1: heard the same things that you got ask what are

1048
00:58:01,960 --> 00:58:05,400
Speaker 1: you saying? You didn't hear him? He said two years,

1049
00:58:06,960 --> 00:58:10,080
Speaker 1: oh yeah, and folded like a shutar Chinese launchy man.

1050
00:58:11,960 --> 00:58:16,400
Speaker 1: Now anything he knew? They know, yeah, two years And

1051
00:58:16,480 --> 00:58:18,600
Speaker 1: I bet you his big ass was giving him the

1052
00:58:18,640 --> 00:58:20,840
Speaker 1: business on the street though. But she had a big

1053
00:58:20,920 --> 00:58:23,240
Speaker 1: old silk striped down his back when he was running

1054
00:58:23,240 --> 00:58:25,480
Speaker 1: around them off of the street. You know what I watched.

1055
00:58:25,640 --> 00:58:29,320
Speaker 1: I'm a very big friend, big fan of forty eight hours.

1056
00:58:29,840 --> 00:58:34,400
Speaker 1: Oh that's the running nine of the cat that walk

1057
00:58:34,440 --> 00:58:37,280
Speaker 1: in there. I could have went home that night, but

1058
00:58:37,440 --> 00:58:41,480
Speaker 1: they don't because I know he was weighing heavy on

1059
00:58:41,560 --> 00:58:45,439
Speaker 1: your chest. Brother, come on and talk to me. Don't

1060
00:58:45,480 --> 00:58:48,440
Speaker 1: get it off your chest and be done with it. Well,

1061
00:58:48,960 --> 00:58:51,480
Speaker 1: you know, if I tell you what happened, I ain't

1062
00:58:51,520 --> 00:58:55,160
Speaker 1: going home. But then just they see that that what

1063
00:58:55,760 --> 00:58:57,840
Speaker 1: that in the in the clinical space, they call that

1064
00:58:57,960 --> 00:59:01,760
Speaker 1: cognitive dissonance. That's believing too things that are the opposite

1065
00:59:01,760 --> 00:59:04,760
Speaker 1: of one another to be true. Right, that I can

1066
00:59:04,840 --> 00:59:08,400
Speaker 1: be honest in this situation and go home. And you

1067
00:59:08,480 --> 00:59:12,320
Speaker 1: know why they're so successful to that ship because they

1068
00:59:12,400 --> 00:59:12,760
Speaker 1: are not