Speaker 1: First Date follow Up powered by the Advocates Injury Attorneys
Speaker 1: online at ADJUSLA dot com.
Speaker 2: Lesha is on the phone today for a first day
Speaker 2: follow up, and she's getting ghosted by a guy named James.
Speaker 2: So in a second we're gonna call him and see
Speaker 2: if you'll tell us why he's a ghostinger and maybe
Speaker 2: get her another date. But first, Lesia, how long has
Speaker 2: it been since you heard from James.
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's been about a week.
Speaker 3: And then how many times have you reached out to
Speaker 3: him in that time?
Speaker 1: Yeah, like kind of a bunch. I was, uh, you know,
Speaker 1: I was texting a bunch. You know, we had a
Speaker 1: great connection and you know, you know, I was trying
Speaker 1: to get together, and you know I texted a few times,
Speaker 1: and you know, we had a plan. He canceled. We
Speaker 1: felt like he needed the weekend to recover. I offered
Speaker 1: to make him soup wish he declined, and I, you know,
Speaker 1: and then after that I texted him a couple of times.
Speaker 1: You know, he's feeling and like nothing.
Speaker 3: So, did your date happen or this was after the date? No?
Speaker 1: Well, well we had our first date, okay, okay, but
Speaker 1: then after that nothing happened.
Speaker 3: Okay, we'll tell us about the date.
Speaker 1: Well, we met Unhinge first of all, and like we
Speaker 1: talked a little bit, and we wanted to go out
Speaker 1: because we both like really like food and travel and stuff.
Speaker 1: And he's in a band and I used to sing
Speaker 1: in a band, so we had like a lot of
Speaker 1: great connections. And so we met for cocktails and we
Speaker 1: like bounced around and got tacos and ended up at
Speaker 1: this like karaoke place, which was really fun. After karaoke,
Speaker 1: we went back to his place and we were hanging
Speaker 1: out and like cuddling and stuff. But we did look up,
Speaker 1: but there was like a lot of like affection myself.
Speaker 1: And in the morning we kissed and like we crammed
Speaker 1: on seeing each other again like the next weekend. So
Speaker 1: that was the date.
Speaker 2: Is there anything that happened on the date that could
Speaker 2: have been awkward or something that would cause him to
Speaker 2: not want to talk to you again?
Speaker 4: So I talked this over a bit, and I think
Speaker 4: there might have been which I like want to apologize for,
Speaker 4: and like I've been feeling bad about it.
Speaker 1: So like when we were like hanging out and cuddling,
Speaker 1: he like pulls out his phone to play me like
Speaker 1: a rough edit of his band's new song, and I
Speaker 1: was excited to hear it. I was glad he wanted
Speaker 1: to share it with me. And you know, because I
Speaker 1: was on the music background, I didn't feel like I
Speaker 1: knew hold back what I thought, you know, So I
Speaker 1: mean I told him, I was like, I think this
Speaker 1: is like a great idea for a song. I said,
Speaker 1: like some of the lyrics were a little cheesy, and
Speaker 1: you know, his voice was a little picky and certain points,
Speaker 1: and like one of the lyrics in particular was like
Speaker 1: about her love being like a sugar rush eating a
Speaker 1: box of Kristy cream or something.
Speaker 3: Okay, I like laughed at that, and.
Speaker 1: Then I kept like asking him if I made him
Speaker 1: feel like he was eating a box of Krispy cream.
Speaker 1: And I thought it was funny, like I was joking,
Speaker 1: and like I think I may have crushed him. I
Speaker 1: don't know, maybe I took it too far. So I
Speaker 1: feel he's apologize. Yeah, but I mean.
Speaker 3: It sounds like you were being more playful.
Speaker 1: Yeah. No, I was just saying, like that's how I felt,
Speaker 1: like that's what the intention was.
Speaker 3: Ju Will you are doing.
Speaker 5: Music now too, so like think about this scenario wouldn't
Speaker 5: it be just kind of cute.
Speaker 3: Like, you're not are you going to be offended? No,
Speaker 3: I wouldn't be.
Speaker 2: I'm also a super harsh critic on myself, so I'd
Speaker 2: be like, you're right, the whole thing is crap.
Speaker 3: I'll throw it out, You're my all over, I quit
Speaker 3: it all.
Speaker 2: So I would just totally be like, yeah, thanks for
Speaker 2: the honest feedback I saw.
Speaker 5: That would also be a major turnoff and problem. Also, Okay,
Speaker 5: so maybe maybe he was a little but hurt.
Speaker 3: Maybe, I mean it might be.
Speaker 1: So I feel like, I don't know. I feel like
Speaker 1: we need to get him on the phone. You need
Speaker 1: to get a third party and to get him on
Speaker 1: the phone's phone because he's just ghosting me so like
Speaker 1: and I just want to apologize.
Speaker 3: Well, we'll try to figure it out for you.
Speaker 2: We'll play a song and we'll come back, and then
Speaker 2: we'll call him and see if it tell us why
Speaker 2: he's ghosting you and maybe get you another date with.
Speaker 3: Krispy Kreme boy. Okay, all right, should we not call
Speaker 3: him Krispy Crean boy? He disappeared?
Speaker 2: All right, Well, if las'll come back and get your
Speaker 2: first a follow up next right in the middle of
Speaker 2: our first date. Follow up if you're just joining us.
Speaker 2: Lisha is on the phone and she's getting ghosted by
Speaker 2: a guy named James. So we're about to call him
Speaker 2: and see if you'll tell us why he is ghostinger
Speaker 2: and maybe get her another date. But first, Lisha, why
Speaker 2: don't you catch us up on your situation.
Speaker 1: Yeah, so, I when I had a date with this
Speaker 1: guy James, it like went really well. We had cocktails
Speaker 1: and tacos, and we did karaoke and all this stuff,
Speaker 1: and you know, we bonded because he's in a band
Speaker 1: and I used to sing in a band, and you know,
Speaker 1: we have a lot of common interests. And I feel
Speaker 1: like and he hasn't tested me back in a week,
Speaker 1: so and I feel like something might have gone wrong
Speaker 1: the night we were on the date. I feel like
Speaker 1: I might have kind of heard his feelings making fun
Speaker 1: of one of his lyrics which involves Krispy Kreme, which
Speaker 1: I kept springing up. No, I don't know. I feel
Speaker 1: like I might have sent him and I need to apologize.
Speaker 1: And also he's ghosting me. So that's where we are.
Speaker 3: All right, are you ready for us to call him?
Speaker 1: Sure?
Speaker 3: Okay, here we go. Hello, him. I speaking to James. Please, yeah,
Speaker 3: speaking James. How are you?
Speaker 4: Man?
Speaker 2: My name is Jeubel. I'm calling from a radio show.
Speaker 2: It's called The Jubil Show.
Speaker 3: Hi, James. I'm Nina also on the show. Hi, and
Speaker 3: I'm Victoria. How are you?
Speaker 6: Oh? Cool, wonderful. I'm doing good man. I'm geting many
Speaker 6: calls on radio.
Speaker 1: But what's up?
Speaker 3: Have you ever listened to the show before?
Speaker 4: Yeah?
Speaker 1: Yeah, I have?
Speaker 3: Okay, thank you? Yeah. Have you ever heard of first
Speaker 3: date follow up before? Oh?
Speaker 6: Yeah, yeah I have? This is this one of these things?
Speaker 3: First a follow up?
Speaker 2: You know, that's a segment where if you're ghosting somebody,
Speaker 2: they can email us and then ask us to call
Speaker 2: you and ask why you're ghosting them. Somebody emailed us
Speaker 2: about you, James, Oh boy, any idea who would be?
Speaker 6: Yeah? Maybe someone I met someone online, like a little
Speaker 6: more than a week ago.
Speaker 3: Is that someone's name? Lisha?
Speaker 1: Yeah?
Speaker 6: Yeah, Lisha?
Speaker 2: Oh yeah yeah. Well Lisia emailed us and told us
Speaker 2: about your day. She said she really liked you, but
Speaker 2: she's confused. Can you tell us why you're ghostinger?
Speaker 6: I really liked her, but man, she's too much. She
Speaker 6: texted me on Saturday to ask about Well, first of all,
Speaker 6: I got sick, right, so like I got sick a
Speaker 6: little bit afterwards, but not the RNA nothing, but like,
Speaker 6: you know, she texted me on Saturday to ask me
Speaker 6: about soup, and then again to tell me good night
Speaker 6: and then text me a list of vitamins I.
Speaker 3: Should be taking because you were sick. Yeah, you know,
Speaker 3: it was.
Speaker 6: Like it was like a trip or a DoorDash GNC.
Speaker 6: You know, the whole bag falling, and then like not.
Speaker 3: Soon after asking if I missed her.
Speaker 6: But this this whole thing about like if I wanted
Speaker 6: Krispy Kremes, Like, ask me if I wanted Krispy Kreme.
Speaker 6: It's a it's a joke about some stupid lyric I made,
Speaker 6: and and and I mean just more texts, on and
Speaker 6: on and on. I'm not even giving you all that.
Speaker 3: Was all in one day. That happened all on the
Speaker 3: same day.
Speaker 6: Yeah, and this is someone I had just talked to online.
Speaker 6: They came over, we cuddled, I mean, the sweet it
Speaker 6: was great, you know, don't get me wrong, But after
Speaker 6: all this just pile it on and just stopping so
Speaker 6: soon I just stopped responding because like I needed to
Speaker 6: rest and I wake up and it was like, I
Speaker 6: mean I lose like twelve text messages from her. I
Speaker 6: don't respond, but I get even more the next day. Eventually,
Speaker 6: I just I just block her because I feel like
Speaker 6: that kind of energy I felt it gives me a
Speaker 6: lot of anxiety, like and I'm gonna go with the
Speaker 6: flow kind of guy. And when it just gets thraw r,
Speaker 6: it's like, first off, it doesn't know, we feel better,
Speaker 6: but then it's like, this is someone I just met,
Speaker 6: sweet girl. I mean, she came over, it was great,
Speaker 6: That day was amazing, Karaoke was fun, and yeah, like
Speaker 6: we talked that it was going to turn into something.
Speaker 6: But then the text, just the messaging, it was just nah, nah,
Speaker 6: it was just a note going.
Speaker 3: I mean, it sounds like she was just concerned because
Speaker 3: you were sick.
Speaker 5: Now, granted, twelve and maybe twenty four text messages might
Speaker 5: be a lot in two days, but the initial reachhout
Speaker 5: probably was kind of nice.
Speaker 3: Though.
Speaker 6: No, I mean, I get it, she's very sweet, but
Speaker 6: it's just someone I just started talking to online and
Speaker 6: it just started giving me the vibe that this is
Speaker 6: the kind of person that's going to give me a
Speaker 6: whole lot of anxiety.
Speaker 4: I don't.
Speaker 6: I just wanted peace.
Speaker 2: Okay, Well, speaking of peace, James, I will let you
Speaker 2: know that Lisa's actually on the phone listening and wants
Speaker 2: to talk to you.
Speaker 6: Yeah. Hi, oh hi, Lisa.
Speaker 1: Do you have a problem getting close to people like you?
Speaker 1: Not act everyone cares about you? Like I was just
Speaker 1: trying to show you that I cared And I'm like
Speaker 1: actually a good caretaker in like times like this.
Speaker 6: I get it. But it's just we just had one
Speaker 6: date after a little bit of online conversation, and I
Speaker 6: just feel Look, you're sweet, wonderful, but I just feel
Speaker 6: that we're nowhere close to the come over and make
Speaker 6: me soup stage of this relationship.
Speaker 1: Okay, Well, you said on your hind that you wanted
Speaker 1: to be intentional about the time we spend together and
Speaker 1: to prioritize the growth, and I feel like I was
Speaker 1: doing that. So I don't know what there is about
Speaker 1: this that you don't you wouldn't like, can.
Speaker 6: We go further than or can we have a relationship first?
Speaker 6: Can we like have some other There's there's steps to
Speaker 6: this before.
Speaker 1: Okay, wait, wait, I'm not ready to be in a
Speaker 1: relationship with you.
Speaker 6: Oh look, that's that's that's not what I said. Okay,
Speaker 6: that's that's not what I said. It's I feel there's
Speaker 6: a little miscommunication here.
Speaker 1: Well, I mean, I'm not well, you just mentioned wanting
Speaker 1: to have a relationship first, Like you talk about me
Speaker 1: texting a lot, and you're already talking about a relationship.
Speaker 1: So I don't know what the problem is with my
Speaker 1: texting when you're like, I want a relationship right now.
Speaker 6: What. No, I'm not I'm not saying right now. It's
Speaker 6: just that I just don't want to jump into things
Speaker 6: that just lead to anxiety. And just like already we're
Speaker 6: checking each other's mental health. Like I'm just trying to
Speaker 6: just go go with the vibe that we had that
Speaker 6: was that was real good. It just felt like this
Speaker 6: was this was just in a different place, and I
Speaker 6: was just like, I don't want to grow with this.
Speaker 1: You are living way too fast, James.
Speaker 6: Look, I just I just I'm I'm all for like
Speaker 6: all those texts in the soup, but I just feel
Speaker 6: that there's there's just a sequence to it that just
Speaker 6: you know, rocks my boat a certain way. And and
Speaker 6: like I'm sorry for or for miscommunicating or or like
Speaker 6: you know, just going outside the vibe that we had,
Speaker 6: and I just feel I just feel like we want
Speaker 6: the wrong direction with that.
Speaker 3: Well, James, would you like another date with Lisa?
Speaker 4: We'll pay for it, James, I just so you know,
Speaker 4: I will go on another date with you, but I
Speaker 4: just want to let you know, like I'm not gonna
Speaker 4: get together with you right now, just so you know.
Speaker 6: Yeah, So, like I said, I'm not interested in rushing
Speaker 6: in and getting together right now. I'm sorry about the miscommunication,
Speaker 6: but I'm willing to give this another go, just as
Speaker 6: long as you don't mention the Krispy Kremes.
Speaker 1: Okay, but we're not going to be like dating yet,
Speaker 1: Like this is just a date date, not like a
Speaker 1: dating date.
Speaker 6: Look, don't worry, I'm not trying to wipe you up
Speaker 6: just yet.
Speaker 1: Wait a minute, you want to wipe me up?
Speaker 4: Like?
Speaker 1: Hold on, why are we jumping to marriage?
Speaker 3: I don't think James wants to marry you yet.
Speaker 2: I think you guys should just go out one more day,
Speaker 2: goes Okay, Okay, I'm all right.
Speaker 1: Jubile's first date follow up