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Speaker 1: First Date follow Up powered by the Advocates Injury Attorneys

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Speaker 1: online at ADJUSLA dot com.

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Speaker 2: Lesha is on the phone today for a first day

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Speaker 2: follow up, and she's getting ghosted by a guy named James.

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Speaker 2: So in a second we're gonna call him and see

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Speaker 2: if you'll tell us why he's a ghostinger and maybe

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Speaker 2: get her another date. But first, Lesia, how long has

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Speaker 2: it been since you heard from James.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, it's been about a week.

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Speaker 3: And then how many times have you reached out to

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Speaker 3: him in that time?

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Speaker 1: Yeah, like kind of a bunch. I was, uh, you know,

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Speaker 1: I was texting a bunch. You know, we had a

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Speaker 1: great connection and you know, you know, I was trying

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Speaker 1: to get together, and you know I texted a few times,

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Speaker 1: and you know, we had a plan. He canceled. We

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Speaker 1: felt like he needed the weekend to recover. I offered

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Speaker 1: to make him soup wish he declined, and I, you know,

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Speaker 1: and then after that I texted him a couple of times.

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Speaker 1: You know, he's feeling and like nothing.

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Speaker 3: So, did your date happen or this was after the date? No?

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Speaker 1: Well, well we had our first date, okay, okay, but

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Speaker 1: then after that nothing happened.

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Speaker 3: Okay, we'll tell us about the date.

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Speaker 1: Well, we met Unhinge first of all, and like we

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Speaker 1: talked a little bit, and we wanted to go out

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Speaker 1: because we both like really like food and travel and stuff.

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Speaker 1: And he's in a band and I used to sing

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Speaker 1: in a band, so we had like a lot of

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Speaker 1: great connections. And so we met for cocktails and we

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Speaker 1: like bounced around and got tacos and ended up at

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Speaker 1: this like karaoke place, which was really fun. After karaoke,

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Speaker 1: we went back to his place and we were hanging

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Speaker 1: out and like cuddling and stuff. But we did look up,

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Speaker 1: but there was like a lot of like affection myself.

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Speaker 1: And in the morning we kissed and like we crammed

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Speaker 1: on seeing each other again like the next weekend. So

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Speaker 1: that was the date.

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Speaker 2: Is there anything that happened on the date that could

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Speaker 2: have been awkward or something that would cause him to

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Speaker 2: not want to talk to you again?

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Speaker 4: So I talked this over a bit, and I think

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Speaker 4: there might have been which I like want to apologize for,

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Speaker 4: and like I've been feeling bad about it.

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Speaker 1: So like when we were like hanging out and cuddling,

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Speaker 1: he like pulls out his phone to play me like

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Speaker 1: a rough edit of his band's new song, and I

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Speaker 1: was excited to hear it. I was glad he wanted

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Speaker 1: to share it with me. And you know, because I

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Speaker 1: was on the music background, I didn't feel like I

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Speaker 1: knew hold back what I thought, you know, So I

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Speaker 1: mean I told him, I was like, I think this

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Speaker 1: is like a great idea for a song. I said,

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Speaker 1: like some of the lyrics were a little cheesy, and

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Speaker 1: you know, his voice was a little picky and certain points,

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Speaker 1: and like one of the lyrics in particular was like

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Speaker 1: about her love being like a sugar rush eating a

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Speaker 1: box of Kristy cream or something.

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Speaker 3: Okay, I like laughed at that, and.

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Speaker 1: Then I kept like asking him if I made him

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Speaker 1: feel like he was eating a box of Krispy cream.

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Speaker 1: And I thought it was funny, like I was joking,

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Speaker 1: and like I think I may have crushed him. I

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Speaker 1: don't know, maybe I took it too far. So I

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Speaker 1: feel he's apologize. Yeah, but I mean.

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Speaker 3: It sounds like you were being more playful.

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Speaker 1: Yeah. No, I was just saying, like that's how I felt,

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Speaker 1: like that's what the intention was.

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Speaker 3: Ju Will you are doing.

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Speaker 5: Music now too, so like think about this scenario wouldn't

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Speaker 5: it be just kind of cute.

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Speaker 3: Like, you're not are you going to be offended? No,

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Speaker 3: I wouldn't be.

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Speaker 2: I'm also a super harsh critic on myself, so I'd

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Speaker 2: be like, you're right, the whole thing is crap.

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Speaker 3: I'll throw it out, You're my all over, I quit

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Speaker 3: it all.

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Speaker 2: So I would just totally be like, yeah, thanks for

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Speaker 2: the honest feedback I saw.

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Speaker 5: That would also be a major turnoff and problem. Also, Okay,

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Speaker 5: so maybe maybe he was a little but hurt.

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Speaker 3: Maybe, I mean it might be.

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Speaker 1: So I feel like, I don't know. I feel like

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Speaker 1: we need to get him on the phone. You need

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Speaker 1: to get a third party and to get him on

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Speaker 1: the phone's phone because he's just ghosting me so like

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Speaker 1: and I just want to apologize.

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Speaker 3: Well, we'll try to figure it out for you.

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Speaker 2: We'll play a song and we'll come back, and then

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Speaker 2: we'll call him and see if it tell us why

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Speaker 2: he's ghosting you and maybe get you another date with.

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Speaker 3: Krispy Kreme boy. Okay, all right, should we not call

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Speaker 3: him Krispy Crean boy? He disappeared?

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Speaker 2: All right, Well, if las'll come back and get your

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Speaker 2: first a follow up next right in the middle of

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Speaker 2: our first date. Follow up if you're just joining us.

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Speaker 2: Lisha is on the phone and she's getting ghosted by

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Speaker 2: a guy named James. So we're about to call him

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Speaker 2: and see if you'll tell us why he is ghostinger

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Speaker 2: and maybe get her another date. But first, Lisha, why

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Speaker 2: don't you catch us up on your situation.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, so, I when I had a date with this

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Speaker 1: guy James, it like went really well. We had cocktails

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Speaker 1: and tacos, and we did karaoke and all this stuff,

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Speaker 1: and you know, we bonded because he's in a band

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Speaker 1: and I used to sing in a band, and you know,

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Speaker 1: we have a lot of common interests. And I feel

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Speaker 1: like and he hasn't tested me back in a week,

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Speaker 1: so and I feel like something might have gone wrong

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Speaker 1: the night we were on the date. I feel like

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Speaker 1: I might have kind of heard his feelings making fun

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Speaker 1: of one of his lyrics which involves Krispy Kreme, which

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Speaker 1: I kept springing up. No, I don't know. I feel

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Speaker 1: like I might have sent him and I need to apologize.

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Speaker 1: And also he's ghosting me. So that's where we are.

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Speaker 3: All right, are you ready for us to call him?

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Speaker 1: Sure?

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Speaker 3: Okay, here we go. Hello, him. I speaking to James. Please, yeah,

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Speaker 3: speaking James. How are you?

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Speaker 4: Man?

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Speaker 2: My name is Jeubel. I'm calling from a radio show.

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Speaker 2: It's called The Jubil Show.

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Speaker 3: Hi, James. I'm Nina also on the show. Hi, and

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Speaker 3: I'm Victoria. How are you?

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Speaker 6: Oh? Cool, wonderful. I'm doing good man. I'm geting many

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Speaker 6: calls on radio.

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Speaker 1: But what's up?

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Speaker 3: Have you ever listened to the show before?

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Speaker 4: Yeah?

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I have?

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Speaker 3: Okay, thank you? Yeah. Have you ever heard of first

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Speaker 3: date follow up before? Oh?

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Speaker 6: Yeah, yeah I have? This is this one of these things?

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Speaker 3: First a follow up?

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Speaker 2: You know, that's a segment where if you're ghosting somebody,

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Speaker 2: they can email us and then ask us to call

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Speaker 2: you and ask why you're ghosting them. Somebody emailed us

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Speaker 2: about you, James, Oh boy, any idea who would be?

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Speaker 6: Yeah? Maybe someone I met someone online, like a little

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Speaker 6: more than a week ago.

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Speaker 3: Is that someone's name? Lisha?

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Speaker 1: Yeah?

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Speaker 6: Yeah, Lisha?

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Speaker 2: Oh yeah yeah. Well Lisia emailed us and told us

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Speaker 2: about your day. She said she really liked you, but

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Speaker 2: she's confused. Can you tell us why you're ghostinger?

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Speaker 6: I really liked her, but man, she's too much. She

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Speaker 6: texted me on Saturday to ask about Well, first of all,

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Speaker 6: I got sick, right, so like I got sick a

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Speaker 6: little bit afterwards, but not the RNA nothing, but like,

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Speaker 6: you know, she texted me on Saturday to ask me

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Speaker 6: about soup, and then again to tell me good night

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Speaker 6: and then text me a list of vitamins I.

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Speaker 3: Should be taking because you were sick. Yeah, you know,

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Speaker 3: it was.

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Speaker 6: Like it was like a trip or a DoorDash GNC.

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Speaker 6: You know, the whole bag falling, and then like not.

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Speaker 3: Soon after asking if I missed her.

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Speaker 6: But this this whole thing about like if I wanted

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Speaker 6: Krispy Kremes, Like, ask me if I wanted Krispy Kreme.

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Speaker 6: It's a it's a joke about some stupid lyric I made,

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Speaker 6: and and and I mean just more texts, on and

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Speaker 6: on and on. I'm not even giving you all that.

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Speaker 3: Was all in one day. That happened all on the

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Speaker 3: same day.

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Speaker 6: Yeah, and this is someone I had just talked to online.

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Speaker 6: They came over, we cuddled, I mean, the sweet it

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Speaker 6: was great, you know, don't get me wrong, But after

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Speaker 6: all this just pile it on and just stopping so

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Speaker 6: soon I just stopped responding because like I needed to

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Speaker 6: rest and I wake up and it was like, I

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Speaker 6: mean I lose like twelve text messages from her. I

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Speaker 6: don't respond, but I get even more the next day. Eventually,

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Speaker 6: I just I just block her because I feel like

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Speaker 6: that kind of energy I felt it gives me a

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Speaker 6: lot of anxiety, like and I'm gonna go with the

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Speaker 6: flow kind of guy. And when it just gets thraw r,

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Speaker 6: it's like, first off, it doesn't know, we feel better,

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Speaker 6: but then it's like, this is someone I just met,

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Speaker 6: sweet girl. I mean, she came over, it was great,

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Speaker 6: That day was amazing, Karaoke was fun, and yeah, like

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Speaker 6: we talked that it was going to turn into something.

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Speaker 6: But then the text, just the messaging, it was just nah, nah,

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Speaker 6: it was just a note going.

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Speaker 3: I mean, it sounds like she was just concerned because

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Speaker 3: you were sick.

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Speaker 5: Now, granted, twelve and maybe twenty four text messages might

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Speaker 5: be a lot in two days, but the initial reachhout

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Speaker 5: probably was kind of nice.

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Speaker 3: Though.

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Speaker 6: No, I mean, I get it, she's very sweet, but

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Speaker 6: it's just someone I just started talking to online and

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Speaker 6: it just started giving me the vibe that this is

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Speaker 6: the kind of person that's going to give me a

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Speaker 6: whole lot of anxiety.

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Speaker 4: I don't.

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Speaker 6: I just wanted peace.

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Speaker 2: Okay, Well, speaking of peace, James, I will let you

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Speaker 2: know that Lisa's actually on the phone listening and wants

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Speaker 2: to talk to you.

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Speaker 6: Yeah. Hi, oh hi, Lisa.

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Speaker 1: Do you have a problem getting close to people like you?

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Speaker 1: Not act everyone cares about you? Like I was just

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Speaker 1: trying to show you that I cared And I'm like

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Speaker 1: actually a good caretaker in like times like this.

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Speaker 6: I get it. But it's just we just had one

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Speaker 6: date after a little bit of online conversation, and I

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Speaker 6: just feel Look, you're sweet, wonderful, but I just feel

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Speaker 6: that we're nowhere close to the come over and make

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Speaker 6: me soup stage of this relationship.

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Speaker 1: Okay, Well, you said on your hind that you wanted

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Speaker 1: to be intentional about the time we spend together and

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Speaker 1: to prioritize the growth, and I feel like I was

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Speaker 1: doing that. So I don't know what there is about

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Speaker 1: this that you don't you wouldn't like, can.

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Speaker 6: We go further than or can we have a relationship first?

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Speaker 6: Can we like have some other There's there's steps to

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Speaker 6: this before.

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Speaker 1: Okay, wait, wait, I'm not ready to be in a

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Speaker 1: relationship with you.

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Speaker 6: Oh look, that's that's that's not what I said. Okay,

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Speaker 6: that's that's not what I said. It's I feel there's

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Speaker 6: a little miscommunication here.

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Speaker 1: Well, I mean, I'm not well, you just mentioned wanting

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Speaker 1: to have a relationship first, Like you talk about me

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Speaker 1: texting a lot, and you're already talking about a relationship.

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Speaker 1: So I don't know what the problem is with my

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Speaker 1: texting when you're like, I want a relationship right now.

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Speaker 6: What. No, I'm not I'm not saying right now. It's

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Speaker 6: just that I just don't want to jump into things

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Speaker 6: that just lead to anxiety. And just like already we're

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Speaker 6: checking each other's mental health. Like I'm just trying to

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Speaker 6: just go go with the vibe that we had that

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Speaker 6: was that was real good. It just felt like this

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Speaker 6: was this was just in a different place, and I

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Speaker 6: was just like, I don't want to grow with this.

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Speaker 1: You are living way too fast, James.

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Speaker 6: Look, I just I just I'm I'm all for like

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Speaker 6: all those texts in the soup, but I just feel

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Speaker 6: that there's there's just a sequence to it that just

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Speaker 6: you know, rocks my boat a certain way. And and

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Speaker 6: like I'm sorry for or for miscommunicating or or like

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Speaker 6: you know, just going outside the vibe that we had,

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Speaker 6: and I just feel I just feel like we want

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Speaker 6: the wrong direction with that.

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Speaker 3: Well, James, would you like another date with Lisa?

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Speaker 4: We'll pay for it, James, I just so you know,

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Speaker 4: I will go on another date with you, but I

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Speaker 4: just want to let you know, like I'm not gonna

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Speaker 4: get together with you right now, just so you know.

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Speaker 6: Yeah, So, like I said, I'm not interested in rushing

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Speaker 6: in and getting together right now. I'm sorry about the miscommunication,

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Speaker 6: but I'm willing to give this another go, just as

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Speaker 6: long as you don't mention the Krispy Kremes.

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Speaker 1: Okay, but we're not going to be like dating yet,

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Speaker 1: Like this is just a date date, not like a

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Speaker 1: dating date.

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Speaker 6: Look, don't worry, I'm not trying to wipe you up

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Speaker 6: just yet.

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Speaker 1: Wait a minute, you want to wipe me up?

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Speaker 4: Like?

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Speaker 1: Hold on, why are we jumping to marriage?

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Speaker 3: I don't think James wants to marry you yet.

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Speaker 2: I think you guys should just go out one more day,

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Speaker 2: goes Okay, Okay, I'm all right.

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Speaker 1: Jubile's first date follow up