WEBVTT - "Boobs in the Moonlight" 0:00:02.080 --> 0:00:08.880 No entering Rdice Stockholm. Hey everybody, this is Arta Marine 0:00:08.880 --> 0:00:11.200 and this is the very first episode of Will You 0:00:11.240 --> 0:00:14.200 Accept This Rose? What We're gonna be on every Wednesday, 0:00:14.280 --> 0:00:17.840 un nuriced. It is a podcast celebrating the greatest comedy 0:00:17.880 --> 0:00:21.320 of all time, The Bachelor franchise. I wrote in Eddie Peppertone, 0:00:21.360 --> 0:00:23.560 who has literally never seen an episode of the show, 0:00:23.600 --> 0:00:25.919 so he's gonna be watching it all season along with 0:00:25.960 --> 0:00:29.080 Aaron folio myself, and so check it out every Wednesday. 0:00:29.480 --> 0:00:35.559 Oh my god, I have a podcast now. This is 0:00:35.680 --> 0:00:40.160 Eddie Peppertone reporting from Atlanta regarding The Bachelor. I can't 0:00:40.159 --> 0:00:46.600 be with Aaron and what's your name? Arden? I'm here 0:00:46.640 --> 0:00:49.360 in Atlanta filming a thing for adult swim and I 0:00:49.360 --> 0:00:51.920 gotta tell you I watched The Bachelor for the first 0:00:51.960 --> 0:00:54.440 time ever in my life. This thing, I found out 0:00:54.880 --> 0:00:59.040 has been on twelve years something like that, and it 0:00:59.120 --> 0:01:02.720 was based on the movie, a fictional movie. So somebody 0:01:02.760 --> 0:01:06.200 created this show out of a movie. I mean, I'm 0:01:06.280 --> 0:01:08.440 late to the party, but thank god I am, because 0:01:08.480 --> 0:01:10.880 I watched it in my hotel room. Just picture this 0:01:11.080 --> 0:01:13.960 me with an iPad in bed. You know, I guess 0:01:14.000 --> 0:01:18.440 everybody should watch this in bed. This guy, this bachelor, 0:01:18.480 --> 0:01:22.920 he's a small town guy. Small town values are very 0:01:22.959 --> 0:01:26.240 important to him. Small town values are very important to 0:01:26.280 --> 0:01:29.839 this guy. That's why he wants to funk six women. 0:01:30.280 --> 0:01:32.560 And basically, really that is what it is. I mean, 0:01:32.560 --> 0:01:35.520 come on, you know this whole thing. It is hilarious 0:01:35.560 --> 0:01:40.480 when they talk about this guy feeling like he's unlovable, 0:01:40.600 --> 0:01:44.679 of him, you know, crying about being unlovable, and his 0:01:44.880 --> 0:01:48.880 mother cries and his father christ. Um, it's very hard 0:01:48.960 --> 0:01:51.520 not to go in and out of consciousness when you're 0:01:51.520 --> 0:01:54.680 when you're watching, um, a piece of ship like this. 0:01:55.200 --> 0:01:58.520 He's going into this house with twenty six women and 0:01:58.560 --> 0:02:02.400 he's going to fun the wife without knowing any of them. 0:02:02.440 --> 0:02:05.960 Like this is the funniest. It's like an arranged marriage. 0:02:06.840 --> 0:02:10.880 Uh in the twenty first century, right, I mean, this guy, 0:02:10.960 --> 0:02:15.360 so he's gonna meet these women and have no real 0:02:16.440 --> 0:02:19.799 interaction with the that's the funniest thing. Like this is 0:02:19.840 --> 0:02:23.040 supposed to lead to marriage. There was this a military 0:02:23.080 --> 0:02:25.800 woman and you we first meet her, she's firing a 0:02:25.880 --> 0:02:30.960 gun and talking about Afghanistan, and then you go into 0:02:31.040 --> 0:02:35.200 the twins who like talking tandem. You know, first he 0:02:35.240 --> 0:02:39.040 gives a first impression Rose, which is hilarious to a 0:02:39.120 --> 0:02:43.960 woman who left her news anchor job to be part 0:02:44.000 --> 0:02:48.560 of this reality show, so she's not exactly Edward Armorrow. Anyway, 0:02:48.639 --> 0:02:50.560 I hope you get a flavor of it from this 0:02:50.680 --> 0:02:55.160 little communicate from Atlanta that you know. I don't know 0:02:55.240 --> 0:02:57.240 how I'm going to watch the rest of this show. 0:02:57.440 --> 0:02:59.360 I mean, I would rather see a show where Gnome 0:02:59.560 --> 0:03:03.120 chomps Ski. You know, the great intellectual Noam Chomsky has 0:03:03.160 --> 0:03:06.880 twenty six hot women around him, just like these women, 0:03:07.040 --> 0:03:11.160 and he's talking to them about U N resolutions and 0:03:11.200 --> 0:03:14.240 they're like, I don't know about U N resolutions, but 0:03:14.320 --> 0:03:18.440 I do know that U N spells un and you're 0:03:18.480 --> 0:03:21.600 being unfriendly to me, Gnom, will you please look at me. 0:03:22.480 --> 0:03:24.440 I would like to see a show like that. But anyway, 0:03:24.600 --> 0:03:29.080 I just can't believe that art In dragged me into 0:03:29.200 --> 0:03:34.200 this nightmare. And I will continue to watch this, but 0:03:34.680 --> 0:03:41.480 it's gonna be hard. Oh yeah, she's gonna get all. 0:03:43.960 --> 0:03:57.160 It feels so good. I just got this rule rules 0:03:57.560 --> 0:04:18.800 to your words. Welcome to the very first podcast of 0:04:18.920 --> 0:04:21.520 Will You Accept This? Rose, Baby Girl. My name is 0:04:21.600 --> 0:04:26.039 Arton Marine. I'm here with my co host Aaron Foley. Hello, UM, 0:04:26.040 --> 0:04:28.800 this is going out to you Bachelor Nations super fans. 0:04:28.920 --> 0:04:33.440 This is a podcast about all things Bachelor. UM, I 0:04:33.520 --> 0:04:35.039 just want to tell you a little bit about my 0:04:35.080 --> 0:04:39.119 back story with a Bachelor. I I hit it hard 0:04:39.200 --> 0:04:41.480 early on. I was in for like the first two 0:04:41.520 --> 0:04:45.320 or three seasons, and uh back in the sixties, back 0:04:45.360 --> 0:04:49.960 to when when it first started, and up to Andrew 0:04:50.040 --> 0:04:54.159 Firestone and then when he rejected Jen Chef, I poor 0:04:54.279 --> 0:04:56.880 Jen Chef, and I watched the gen Chef season and 0:04:56.920 --> 0:05:01.240 then when she took us through about about seventy two 0:05:01.279 --> 0:05:05.560 hours of television and then said I choose not to choose, 0:05:06.000 --> 0:05:08.680 that was when at that moment, I was like, fuck you, 0:05:08.839 --> 0:05:11.880 I'm out. I'm out Jen Chef. Like was she? I 0:05:12.120 --> 0:05:14.640 just started watching the Okay, so she had been I 0:05:14.680 --> 0:05:16.599 think she was the number two for Andrew fire Style. 0:05:16.760 --> 0:05:19.120 So she was the new bachelorette. Oh, she became the 0:05:19.120 --> 0:05:22.280 new bachelor. She refused to she chose not to choose. 0:05:22.279 --> 0:05:25.440 She didn't take anybody. And it's like it's like girl 0:05:25.480 --> 0:05:28.320 she wears pleated duck or this was a while ago, 0:05:28.360 --> 0:05:30.400 but she wore a lot of like statement necklaces and 0:05:30.400 --> 0:05:33.799 like chunky jewelry and she's like, it's just the plainest Jane. 0:05:33.960 --> 0:05:36.320 She was a really cute playing Jane. I feel like 0:05:36.360 --> 0:05:39.400 she was like from Chicago and she's like, girl, this 0:05:39.440 --> 0:05:41.360 is just a get Like you don't want to marry them, 0:05:41.400 --> 0:05:43.279 although it's preferred if you do, but you don't have to. 0:05:43.520 --> 0:05:47.719 Like you pick one. You didn't get satisfaction, just pick one, 0:05:47.800 --> 0:05:50.240 You just pick one. So I was out. I tapped out. 0:05:50.279 --> 0:05:54.800 And then about last year, I guess when whenever last fall, 0:05:55.160 --> 0:05:57.840 the most important thing in my life happened and somebody 0:05:57.920 --> 0:06:00.320 told me to get back into the Bachelor franchise and 0:06:00.480 --> 0:06:03.200 I got back in with Caitlin, and uh, I gotta 0:06:03.240 --> 0:06:05.520 tell you it was a game changer. I mean Caitlin 0:06:05.600 --> 0:06:09.440 Bristow just first of all, she was a firecracker. You 0:06:09.520 --> 0:06:13.760 gotta love you gotta love Caitlin. And then once we 0:06:13.800 --> 0:06:16.880 got to the episode two things. One was Tony the Healer. 0:06:16.920 --> 0:06:20.360 I was like tapping in with Toy the Healer. For 0:06:20.360 --> 0:06:22.720 those of you um out there who are are new 0:06:22.760 --> 0:06:25.800 to The Bachelor, he was a contestant. He was his 0:06:25.839 --> 0:06:27.760 profession was a healer. And that's always one of the 0:06:27.760 --> 0:06:32.840 best things about all the contestants profession. His profession was healer, 0:06:33.400 --> 0:06:36.440 and he would say he might have been a serial killer. 0:06:36.440 --> 0:06:38.440 He would say with dead earnest is two people into 0:06:38.480 --> 0:06:40.960 the camera, again and again. I see the world to 0:06:41.120 --> 0:06:43.760 the eyes of a child, a spirit of a warrior 0:06:44.040 --> 0:06:46.880 and the heart of a gypsy like anybody that talks. 0:06:47.839 --> 0:06:51.000 New tattooed right above her as crack you know what 0:06:51.240 --> 0:06:53.280 it actually called. I could only afford the first half 0:06:53.880 --> 0:06:56.039 for and then. But I'm hoping to get the spirit 0:06:56.080 --> 0:06:57.880 of a gypsy after I pay my taxes, when I 0:06:57.920 --> 0:07:00.360 get my refund this yeff, going right to the ink bar, 0:07:00.800 --> 0:07:03.640 right to get cat phone d Yeah. I mean we 0:07:03.760 --> 0:07:05.880 got to have some sort of tab wherever you post 0:07:05.960 --> 0:07:10.640 this to people, to people to donate what you know 0:07:10.840 --> 0:07:14.080 we should get. We should put together like a Kickstarter 0:07:14.200 --> 0:07:19.000 campaign completely healing tattoo. Here's my question for you, how 0:07:19.120 --> 0:07:21.160 much would you actually have to be paid to eat 0:07:21.360 --> 0:07:24.360 It's it's not a short chunk of words there. I 0:07:24.440 --> 0:07:26.840 see the world through the eyes of a child. I 0:07:26.920 --> 0:07:29.000 have the spirit of a gypsy in the heart of 0:07:29.000 --> 0:07:30.800 a warrior, or the heart of the warrior, spirit of 0:07:30.840 --> 0:07:33.360 a gypsy. How much would you have to be paid 0:07:33.440 --> 0:07:36.040 ink that on your body. To ink that on my body, 0:07:36.160 --> 0:07:38.880 i'd have to be, well, you know, quite a quite 0:07:38.920 --> 0:07:40.360 an amount of money to get me out of a 0:07:40.400 --> 0:07:44.440 couple of jams. I'd probably say sixty grand. Oh no, 0:07:44.600 --> 0:07:48.000 I probably say like five and up. Pretty good. Things 0:07:48.040 --> 0:07:51.480 are not good for me right now. For any of 0:07:51.560 --> 0:07:54.120 our listeners out there, we don't know what our email 0:07:54.120 --> 0:07:57.400 addresses yet, so tweet tweet me at our marine air 0:07:57.480 --> 0:08:00.320 d E N M y R I N and let's 0:08:00.320 --> 0:08:02.440 see maybe we could, maybe we could get a Kickstarter 0:08:02.560 --> 0:08:04.800 campaign for one of our listeners out there who would 0:08:04.840 --> 0:08:07.080 do it for the lowest amount, and we can see 0:08:07.080 --> 0:08:08.600 if we can actually start a page for one of 0:08:08.640 --> 0:08:12.400 you guys. Wait, would you seriously? And all seriously, podcasts 0:08:12.400 --> 0:08:15.320 are very serious and their subject is very serious. How 0:08:15.400 --> 0:08:17.480 low would you go? I mean I love it, but 0:08:17.600 --> 0:08:19.640 I'm no, no, no, I love the game like this, 0:08:19.720 --> 0:08:23.160 So let's start high. Okay, So five, So where would 0:08:23.160 --> 0:08:25.440 I put it? This has to be a righte above 0:08:25.480 --> 0:08:30.120 your ass crack okay. So so it's like not even 0:08:30.160 --> 0:08:32.760 a tramp stamp. It's almost like a cox Ex bone stamp. 0:08:33.160 --> 0:08:36.000 Well I think it's like a okay, tramps. So it's 0:08:36.000 --> 0:08:38.720 a tramp stamp, like if you're at the beach, someone's 0:08:38.720 --> 0:08:44.080 gonna see this. Okay, okay, okay, here's my question. Could 0:08:44.240 --> 0:08:47.400 the entry fee if I actually got it tattooed above 0:08:47.480 --> 0:08:50.440 my ask crack? Could I then be promised a slot 0:08:50.559 --> 0:08:54.360 as a contestant on The Bachelor? Okay, yes, okay. I 0:08:54.480 --> 0:08:58.040 would do it honestly for cash after taxes. I don't 0:08:58.040 --> 0:09:00.680 have to pay any taxes on it. Okay, very into 0:09:00.720 --> 0:09:03.719 the law. I haven't filed in years. Oh my god, 0:09:04.200 --> 0:09:06.720 Aaron is running. I'm not kidding. That's not a joke. 0:09:06.880 --> 0:09:09.400 I really have to get on it. Um. I would 0:09:09.440 --> 0:09:13.800 say I would probably do it for I would do 0:09:13.840 --> 0:09:16.000 it for two hundred fifty dollars cash. Oh all right, 0:09:16.040 --> 0:09:19.319 I thought you were going to say, like, no, you know, 0:09:19.880 --> 0:09:21.280 let's pushed me lower. What I do it for a hunter? 0:09:21.320 --> 0:09:22.640 I would do it for a hundred thousand. I think 0:09:22.640 --> 0:09:24.520 I do it for hund would do it on the 0:09:24.520 --> 0:09:25.920 back of the mind that I could get it removed. 0:09:26.200 --> 0:09:27.599 But here's the I would do it. Would hurt to 0:09:27.600 --> 0:09:29.240 get that removed. Thing is you can't get it removed. 0:09:29.440 --> 0:09:30.760 I'm part of the deal. No, I would do it 0:09:30.800 --> 0:09:34.040 for a hundred thousands to keep checking in because keep 0:09:35.080 --> 0:09:36.439 or you have to return the money if you get 0:09:36.440 --> 0:09:38.320 it removed. Oh yeah, and you know what, and then 0:09:38.360 --> 0:09:40.960 you have like that weird removed like you're the chick 0:09:41.080 --> 0:09:43.760 with like a removed tramp stamp, like healer from a 0:09:43.840 --> 0:09:47.400 bachelor contest. You know what, I think I would do 0:09:47.440 --> 0:09:49.120 it for a hundred grand I think I'd probably do 0:09:49.160 --> 0:09:51.679 it because us to think about it after taxes, like 0:09:51.760 --> 0:09:55.040 before taxes, assuming I would have to pay like an 0:09:55.080 --> 0:09:58.360 agent or something taxes right now, Okay, I just pay 0:09:58.440 --> 0:10:01.240 my taxes. Okay, let's keep going. Then um on the 0:10:01.320 --> 0:10:03.319 other thing, and he kept saying people like everybody there. 0:10:03.360 --> 0:10:04.880 So Tony also would be like I gave up a 0:10:05.000 --> 0:10:07.840 lot to be here. You know, I left my plants, 0:10:08.120 --> 0:10:10.559 I left my bonds, eye tree, I left my birds. 0:10:11.320 --> 0:10:13.240 You're telling me that's not the greatest. This is the 0:10:13.320 --> 0:10:16.080 greatest comedy on television. Then you get to last year, 0:10:16.240 --> 0:10:19.079 JJ and Clint to have a Clint this hot sort 0:10:19.120 --> 0:10:21.839 of area nation the most like hill or youth looking 0:10:21.960 --> 0:10:24.400 into the camera going you know what I mean? He 0:10:24.520 --> 0:10:27.679 was a gorgeous blonde, not my type, not not no 0:10:27.760 --> 0:10:30.120 pepper in this pop but like a good looking little 0:10:30.200 --> 0:10:33.160 blonde peanut looking into the into the camera saying I 0:10:33.280 --> 0:10:35.839 never thought that I would be coming here to meet 0:10:35.880 --> 0:10:37.599 my wife and I'd end up falling in love with 0:10:37.640 --> 0:10:40.040 a man. I'm in love with JJ, are you? I 0:10:41.800 --> 0:10:44.319 have that moment recorded and sometimes I just go back 0:10:44.360 --> 0:10:46.400 in and play do you just mess? Is that you're 0:10:46.440 --> 0:10:53.000 like at your calm tape filthy? I'm sorry, I'm sorry, 0:10:53.040 --> 0:10:55.560 Bachelor Nation. Please will you accept my rose and my apology? 0:10:56.280 --> 0:10:58.480 Why you please accept my rosen apology? I've got one 0:10:58.520 --> 0:11:01.120 more tramp stamp does for you. So so that's basically 0:11:01.160 --> 0:11:02.880 how I got back in, and then of course it's 0:11:02.880 --> 0:11:05.000 a season to jump back in. And then I got 0:11:05.080 --> 0:11:06.599 and then somebody was like, well you have to do 0:11:06.720 --> 0:11:08.640 Badslor in Paradise, and I was like, come on, I'm 0:11:08.640 --> 0:11:10.120 not a loser. And then I was like, oh yes 0:11:10.200 --> 0:11:14.120 I am. I will love to the Bachelor in Paradise. Editors, Now, Aaron, 0:11:14.160 --> 0:11:16.760 you didn't watch Bachelor par watch two episodes and was 0:11:16.840 --> 0:11:18.880 so discussed today I turned it off. Me. I just 0:11:19.160 --> 0:11:21.280 let me just give you three things to help drink 0:11:21.320 --> 0:11:23.240 you in. For and for any Badgelor fans out there 0:11:23.280 --> 0:11:26.400 who resisted Badgelor in Paradise, Like I did you know? 0:11:26.520 --> 0:11:28.360 You don't have to admit it to anybody. It can 0:11:28.360 --> 0:11:32.480 be your secret shame show. Um, here's what's the editors 0:11:32.520 --> 0:11:35.880 on Baslor in Paradise, I think secretly hate the contestants. 0:11:36.000 --> 0:11:38.240 So they edited it in a way that like, so 0:11:38.360 --> 0:11:41.720 there'll be a girl that's super hammered, like probably talking 0:11:41.760 --> 0:11:44.360 to one of the producers, and then what they'll edit 0:11:44.440 --> 0:11:46.800 it so like she's actually talking to like a raccoon 0:11:46.920 --> 0:11:49.839 that's holding like a wine bottle. And then there was 0:11:49.920 --> 0:11:51.880 like literally and they were like what do you think? 0:11:51.960 --> 0:11:53.959 And they would cut to the raccoon who's like holding 0:11:54.000 --> 0:11:56.600 the bottle upside down. There was a girl they kept 0:11:56.760 --> 0:11:58.120 making it look like she was going to like talk 0:11:58.160 --> 0:12:01.000 to a crab and stuff. So it was it's crazy. 0:12:01.120 --> 0:12:03.200 Is it all the it's all the crazy, it's crazy 0:12:03.320 --> 0:12:05.800 nut birds from the regular show exactly. It's all the 0:12:05.800 --> 0:12:08.960 people who didn't find love, including Amber, who's back this season. 0:12:09.120 --> 0:12:11.040 So that brings you so aar Just a little backstory. 0:12:11.400 --> 0:12:16.080 When did you get in on Bachelor? Um? I probably 0:12:16.240 --> 0:12:18.760 started a couple of years ago, so I've probably had 0:12:18.880 --> 0:12:22.200 maybe seven eight seasons or something like that, Well, here's 0:12:22.200 --> 0:12:23.959 what if I don't know a lot, but I know 0:12:24.640 --> 0:12:27.280 you know, you'll be our historian. You'll be our Bachelor 0:12:27.360 --> 0:12:29.280 history of the two of us. I will say, like, 0:12:29.440 --> 0:12:33.000 what was interesting? Diving back into the show. I don't 0:12:33.000 --> 0:12:35.199 remember people's names though, I don't remember anybody. I don't 0:12:35.200 --> 0:12:37.000 remember I don't even remember your name. I don't remember 0:12:37.040 --> 0:12:40.640 anybody's name. Oh my god, I'm Amanda and I'm a healer. 0:12:41.040 --> 0:12:44.199 Um there's but like what's amazing when you start watching it. 0:12:44.280 --> 0:12:46.280 There's all these weird super fans and it's never who 0:12:46.320 --> 0:12:48.360 you would think. I would never have been, like, you 0:12:48.400 --> 0:12:51.480 know who watches a Bachelor, it's Aaron Fully Now I'm 0:12:51.640 --> 0:12:56.360 I'm all into a level where um, I'm I'm like in, 0:12:56.640 --> 0:12:59.839 I'm obsessed, what's your favorite? I used to do like 0:13:00.080 --> 0:13:02.440 the did like the night after the shows do rundowns 0:13:02.480 --> 0:13:05.360 on Facebook, but they got too long and and it 0:13:05.520 --> 0:13:07.440 was and but people were like, you have to start 0:13:07.440 --> 0:13:09.400 because I would just be like, this is not like whatever, 0:13:10.240 --> 0:13:12.800 because I would get so I mean even after you 0:13:12.880 --> 0:13:15.200 came over for the show on Monday and with our 0:13:15.200 --> 0:13:17.280 friend Renee, and we were just we could barely get 0:13:17.280 --> 0:13:19.520 through because you're just this is like I love having 0:13:19.559 --> 0:13:22.079 people over. I never like doing stand up on Sunday 0:13:22.160 --> 0:13:26.120 or Monday, yes, and so to have people over, and 0:13:26.400 --> 0:13:28.040 it takes us three hours to get through these shows 0:13:28.080 --> 0:13:31.600 because we're laughing so hard. I gotta tell you it. Actually, 0:13:31.640 --> 0:13:35.440 when I watch it, it makes it makes every cell 0:13:35.520 --> 0:13:38.160 on my body crazy, Like I think it's my favorite 0:13:38.160 --> 0:13:40.760 comedy on televisions. And then I by the end, I 0:13:40.800 --> 0:13:43.160 found myself invested, like I actually did like Sean. I 0:13:43.240 --> 0:13:44.760 know most people you know, you were not your team, 0:13:44.840 --> 0:13:47.880 not team Sean for Caitlin. Oh yeah, no, I mean 0:13:47.960 --> 0:13:49.360 I like Sean. I just thought he was like a 0:13:49.400 --> 0:13:51.400 little bit of roided out in my head moments right, 0:13:51.480 --> 0:13:53.720 like I liked Nick, but there was But I actually 0:13:53.800 --> 0:13:56.080 with this. I actually still find myself like checking up 0:13:56.160 --> 0:13:58.640 on them to see if they're still together. They are, 0:13:59.120 --> 0:14:02.080 they're splitting their time time between Nashville. There's plenty other 0:14:02.160 --> 0:14:06.240 time between Nashville and vancou and the Coup Vancouver. I 0:14:06.280 --> 0:14:09.199 thought he lived in Connecticut or something. He's from Connecticut, 0:14:09.559 --> 0:14:11.319 but he lives in Nashville. Now. I think he's a 0:14:11.400 --> 0:14:15.400 trainer in Nashville. And she picked her up about seven times. 0:14:15.960 --> 0:14:18.160 He was every shot. He was picking her up with 0:14:18.240 --> 0:14:21.320 a flannelon. Yeah. And then Nick was crying in like 0:14:21.400 --> 0:14:23.520 an Irish sweater in the corner, and she was busy. 0:14:23.600 --> 0:14:25.880 She would like cry and like put her hand, you can't. 0:14:25.960 --> 0:14:27.960 She would always she would cry in a way like 0:14:28.040 --> 0:14:31.360 wiping away her tears with her fingers, like really extended. 0:14:31.480 --> 0:14:33.720 Which brings us to Ben, which brings us to Ben 0:14:33.960 --> 0:14:36.640 aggains this year's bachelor. Now, did you think it was 0:14:36.640 --> 0:14:39.360 gonna be Jared? Did you think it was gonna be Jared? Um? 0:14:39.640 --> 0:14:43.200 I liked jareded both from Rhode Island, little road road, 0:14:43.760 --> 0:14:46.080 biggest little of the Union. We had the biggest little 0:14:46.120 --> 0:14:48.840 state in the Union, Rhode Island. Did you know that 0:14:48.920 --> 0:14:51.680 song too? I did know that song? But what would 0:14:51.680 --> 0:14:54.120 I always go to when people say Rhode Island? I say, 0:14:54.160 --> 0:14:57.760 if you're playing trivia, it is it always comes up 0:14:58.160 --> 0:15:01.160 that Rhode Island is the smallest state with the longest name. 0:15:01.320 --> 0:15:05.320 Because the technical state of the of Rhode Island is 0:15:05.440 --> 0:15:11.240 state of Rhode Island and Providence Plantations. That is something 0:15:11.480 --> 0:15:15.880 I didn't know. So so I also liked I know 0:15:15.920 --> 0:15:17.520 a lot of women out there like Jared I thought 0:15:17.600 --> 0:15:21.920 Jared was charming. Can I see this place Jared was 0:15:22.000 --> 0:15:25.640 on Bachelor in Paradise was a pig. No, he was 0:15:25.680 --> 0:15:29.640 a palm of poor Jared' bachelor. He was such a gentleman. 0:15:29.840 --> 0:15:32.560 And this girl Ashley, I don't know, there's so many Ashley's. 0:15:32.560 --> 0:15:35.120 It was like Ashley, I Astley age. Ashley j one 0:15:35.160 --> 0:15:37.320 of the Ashleys who was obsessed. It was like this 0:15:37.440 --> 0:15:39.440 beautiful girl kind of looks like a card Ashi and 0:15:39.520 --> 0:15:43.520 she's wait, not the crazy one from She's the World. 0:15:43.600 --> 0:15:46.120 So she became obsessed with poor Jared because she thought 0:15:46.160 --> 0:15:48.520 he looked like the guy from Aladdin. No, yeah, and 0:15:48.640 --> 0:15:51.480 did she say that out loud? And so she literally 0:15:52.040 --> 0:15:54.280 was going to give him her v card and when like, like, 0:15:54.400 --> 0:15:56.600 the poor guy, here's the best fact, you have to 0:15:56.680 --> 0:15:59.800 watch it, he wouldn't. She wouldn't take no for it's 0:15:59.840 --> 0:16:03.520 the she's virgin like in North America. So she became 0:16:03.560 --> 0:16:06.520 obsessed with him and like basically put her inky spray 0:16:06.640 --> 0:16:08.600 all over him and was like no other girl can 0:16:08.640 --> 0:16:10.840 have him. And he was being such a gentleman. He 0:16:10.920 --> 0:16:12.600 didn't know how to shake her. He was clearly still 0:16:12.640 --> 0:16:15.080 hurt from Caitlin and oh, my god, I can't believe 0:16:15.080 --> 0:16:16.760 I could actually say this out loud in the room 0:16:16.880 --> 0:16:19.040 and like people who are here, and it's actually the 0:16:19.120 --> 0:16:21.200 safe space. We can leave it here. This is a 0:16:21.240 --> 0:16:24.840 safe space. And so but she ended up writing him 0:16:25.280 --> 0:16:27.880 like a twelve page letter when he caught her, and 0:16:27.960 --> 0:16:31.360 it was twelve page, single space, back and back in front, 0:16:31.720 --> 0:16:34.520 like back to back. She wrote him a letter that 0:16:34.600 --> 0:16:38.560 was like twenty four pages, single space. She's she was 0:16:38.760 --> 0:16:41.120 my least favorite. She was glad that she had a 0:16:41.160 --> 0:16:43.480 lot of botox. So when she cried and then her 0:16:43.560 --> 0:16:45.720 sister came on you and you're like, what happened in 0:16:45.800 --> 0:16:48.600 that household? That her sister was just like her but 0:16:48.800 --> 0:16:50.800 was like banging all the dudes. One of the greatest 0:16:50.960 --> 0:16:56.400 Bachelor scenes I've ever witnessed was Ashley Princess Jersey and 0:16:56.480 --> 0:16:59.920 then psychopath um Woman. They were on a double day. 0:17:00.720 --> 0:17:03.560 Who was the guy? Was it the farmer? I didn't 0:17:03.600 --> 0:17:05.680 see that was a farmer. I think it was farmer. 0:17:06.359 --> 0:17:08.240 Should I can't remember, That's what I'm saying. I can't 0:17:08.240 --> 0:17:10.240 remember these. I forget what the guy. I think the 0:17:10.280 --> 0:17:13.639 guy was Chris the farmer. Okay, so Chris the Farmer 0:17:13.760 --> 0:17:16.720 goes on a double date with psychopath woman who literally 0:17:17.240 --> 0:17:20.720 couldn't get the information soon enough out on camera that 0:17:20.800 --> 0:17:24.480 her husband died of like an aneurysm. She they basically 0:17:24.560 --> 0:17:26.600 were like, are you excited about the day, And she's 0:17:26.600 --> 0:17:28.840 just like, yes, my husband out of an aneurism. It's like, 0:17:28.880 --> 0:17:32.160 what do you want for breakfast? Eggs? My husband? That yeah? 0:17:32.280 --> 0:17:35.600 So psycho and she was psycho. So Psycho and Princess 0:17:35.680 --> 0:17:38.680 New Jersey going a double day in like a canyon. 0:17:39.520 --> 0:17:43.560 He flies in with a helicopter, cuts them both and 0:17:43.760 --> 0:17:46.879 flies out with a helicopter and these two are crying 0:17:46.920 --> 0:17:48.760 in the canyon. I was like, oh my god, it 0:17:48.880 --> 0:17:51.560 was amazing. It's almost like the bat Cave. It's like 0:17:51.600 --> 0:17:54.760 the heart the heart rate bat cave. He like repelled 0:17:54.800 --> 0:17:57.520 it and just to leave a wounded virgin and a 0:17:57.600 --> 0:18:00.639 wounded widow. Take no prisoners in the bathroom. That's the thing. 0:18:00.720 --> 0:18:04.080 You take no prisoners the world. But this is what 0:18:04.200 --> 0:18:05.600 I want to say, and this is what I noticed. 0:18:05.600 --> 0:18:07.679 And again, you have more, you have more. You are 0:18:07.720 --> 0:18:10.560 our expert here, I'm really not. But what I noticed 0:18:10.760 --> 0:18:13.680 what I noticed watching the Batteurette last year, how quickly 0:18:13.920 --> 0:18:16.800 these guys would dump all their ship on her almost 0:18:16.840 --> 0:18:18.800 like that's a connection. Like people can't wait to be 0:18:18.880 --> 0:18:21.520 like my mom does. It's a trend. Yeah, it's a trend. 0:18:21.640 --> 0:18:24.600 I I oh my god, the one that that like 0:18:24.880 --> 0:18:27.639 broke his neck running and then insulted her at the 0:18:27.640 --> 0:18:30.920 Alimo last year. I went to Princeton. Yes, he was 0:18:31.359 --> 0:18:33.879 so awful he couldn't saying he went, this guy is 0:18:33.960 --> 0:18:39.440 perfect to that great stories. He got hit by a 0:18:39.520 --> 0:18:42.240 car or whatever and now and then he was such 0:18:42.280 --> 0:18:44.480 an asshole because he knew he was losing, and he 0:18:44.760 --> 0:18:49.320 was losing over he was. He was disgusting. You know 0:18:49.359 --> 0:18:51.119 what I love whenever I hear because like I grew 0:18:51.200 --> 0:18:53.480 up back as you know, back east, Philip Pecky's people 0:18:53.640 --> 0:18:56.639 love if somebody went to Harvard or Priston. They love 0:18:56.720 --> 0:18:59.159 to let you know it within the first twenty seconds. 0:18:59.400 --> 0:19:01.240 But what I love to do the way Princeton people 0:19:01.280 --> 0:19:02.760 do it is they come, I went to school in 0:19:02.800 --> 0:19:04.479 New Jersey, and then I like to go, oh, did 0:19:04.520 --> 0:19:07.200 you go to Rutgers, knowing full well what the answer 0:19:07.280 --> 0:19:08.919 is it like, no, no, it was Printon. It was Princeton, 0:19:09.160 --> 0:19:10.879 you know, But like they are people like I went 0:19:10.920 --> 0:19:12.919 to college in Cambridge, you know, and I'd be like, oh, 0:19:13.000 --> 0:19:16.480 did you go to like you asked me Cambridge, Like no, 0:19:16.560 --> 0:19:18.159 it was Harvard. I went to Harvard. It was Harvard, 0:19:18.320 --> 0:19:21.000 you know. It's like, yeah, yeah, we got it. No, 0:19:21.119 --> 0:19:23.200 I think you've hit it. The two trends. What I've 0:19:23.320 --> 0:19:25.800 noticed just from the last couple of years is you 0:19:25.920 --> 0:19:29.800 have to drop tragedy v immediately and then I Love 0:19:29.880 --> 0:19:32.720 you bombs by like episode four. Yeah, It's just it's 0:19:32.760 --> 0:19:34.600 so ridiculous. It's like, who can say I love you 0:19:34.680 --> 0:19:38.160 the quickest? A bunch of lesbians? Yeah, those are my people. 0:19:38.240 --> 0:19:42.600 Nobody panic. They dropped the elboms like like lesbians all 0:19:42.640 --> 0:19:46.960 over and uh and it's like who died? Yeah, the tragedy. Now, 0:19:47.200 --> 0:19:49.200 to be fair, we were giggling a lot during the 0:19:49.240 --> 0:19:52.639 first episode, but I was putting money on. Also, single 0:19:52.720 --> 0:19:55.560 moms generally are going to like bust out, I'm here 0:19:55.600 --> 0:20:01.240 for my twins, Kaylee and in Brooklyn, like I don't know, 0:20:01.400 --> 0:20:04.840 did I couldn't even did she say that. No, moms 0:20:04.880 --> 0:20:06.920 are gonna win. They're gonna make it pretty far because 0:20:06.960 --> 0:20:08.960 they're usually a hot mom. But like it's not they're 0:20:09.000 --> 0:20:14.160 not gonna win. She's she's got to um and then 0:20:14.359 --> 0:20:17.720 we have uh and then also like how quickly people 0:20:17.920 --> 0:20:21.560 just drop the tragedies. Um, so let's get to this season. 0:20:22.400 --> 0:20:25.880 Oh my god. Now overall scale a one to ten. 0:20:26.280 --> 0:20:28.800 How do you give the episode? What did you think? 0:20:28.880 --> 0:20:32.320 I mean, I'm going, I'm going guns and blazons. I'd 0:20:32.359 --> 0:20:34.200 literally give it like a nine and a half. I 0:20:34.320 --> 0:20:36.280 loved every secon. I'm gonna give it in eleven? Can 0:20:36.320 --> 0:20:39.119 I give it an eleven? I don't? I mean I 0:20:39.600 --> 0:20:44.000 was laughing so hard. The job titles were amazing job titles. 0:20:44.280 --> 0:20:48.159 I mean, what was the chicken enthusiast? Chicken enthusiasts? I 0:20:48.240 --> 0:20:52.280