Speaker 1: I'm not joking. Almost every interstitial piece of the Beyonce
Speaker 1: concert she was smoking cigarette, smoking something, smoking a stogy,
Speaker 1: smoking a cigarette, smoking stokey cigar. I don't know, but
Speaker 1: I'm like, did you.
Speaker 2: Hear it in her voice that she's been smoking?
Speaker 3: She like, Jeline, jolly Joel, Joe, beg of you beg Jeline.
Speaker 3: Please don't take Joane.
Speaker 2: You was always a bird.
Speaker 1: Go sing your songs somewhere else. You're freaking bird.
Speaker 2: Hello the Internet, and welcome to season three, eighty six,
Speaker 2: Episode three of Dirt Elysis. Guys, it's a production by
Speaker 2: Heart Radio. It's a podcast where we take a deep
Speaker 2: dive in to america shared consciousness. And it is, in fact, Wednesday,
Speaker 2: April thirtieth, twenty twenty five, the last day of April.
Speaker 1: Yep, Yeahaunt, no fooling us. It's the last day of April.
Speaker 1: It's also Stop Food Waste Day. It's National Adopted Shelter
Speaker 1: Pet Day, the National Military Brat's Day, National bubble Tea Day,
Speaker 1: National Raisin Day, National Oatmeal cookie Day. Oh put those together,
Speaker 1: my most hated cookie. I'm sorry oatmeal, raisin, and get
Speaker 1: the fuck out my face. National Bugs Bunny Day, Hairstylist
Speaker 1: Appreciation Day and Honesty Day.
Speaker 2: What's your favorite cookie? Chocolate chip?
Speaker 1: I don't have like a favorite. I love chocolate chip,
Speaker 1: I love double chocolate, I love peanut butter chocolate. I
Speaker 1: have like oatmeal peanut butter, but oatmeal raisin. Fuck you,
Speaker 1: that's not a cookie. That's a punishment from my grandmother.
Speaker 1: My grandmother would always make sure that I'm making cookies
Speaker 1: and it would be oatmeal raisin. And I remember I
Speaker 1: got in trouble because I'm like, like, these are cookies.
Speaker 1: And the way she she didn't suffer fools, she like
Speaker 1: she was should.
Speaker 2: Be doesn't suffer fools day, you know, like the last
Speaker 2: day of April should be just where you don't take
Speaker 2: no ship from no fools.
Speaker 3: Yeah.
Speaker 2: I don't know what the opposite of like an April
Speaker 2: Fool's prank is, but we should come up with it.
Speaker 1: It would be like it would be like cutting honesty,
Speaker 1: cutting Honesty Day, Yeah, yeah, just airing a grievance, like
Speaker 1: really something that maybe should be done a little bit
Speaker 1: more delicately, just forcing.
Speaker 2: That, like chic Earnest, we don't like your personality. We
Speaker 2: think it's bad, right exactly you're doing a lot all
Speaker 2: the time. Anyways, my name is Jack O'Brien aka past
Speaker 2: the puke bag on the right hand. I'll past the
Speaker 2: puke bag on the right and I'll give me that
Speaker 2: puke bag before he fills my hands. That one courtesy
Speaker 2: a snarf you law on the discord as to the
Speaker 2: fact that we don't we don't get puke bags as
Speaker 2: they're not as omnipresent as they as they once were.
Speaker 2: They used to be one of the two things that
Speaker 2: you got in your seatback card. You got the fun
Speaker 2: little comic but one page comic about what happens if
Speaker 2: the plane crashes, and then you got a puke bag.
Speaker 2: And now they're just like they're cocky, they're calling their shots.
Speaker 2: They're like, this is gonna be a smooth flight. Nobody's
Speaker 2: gonna need to throw up.
Speaker 1: Unless you're drunk. You're drunk, in which case you've got
Speaker 1: to throw off the plane drunk man, but he's sick.
Speaker 2: Anyways, my seven year old threw up in my hands
Speaker 2: on the most recent place.
Speaker 1: You're dedicated, Dedicated, Dedicated.
Speaker 2: That's called dedication, and this is Dedication Day. I'm thrilled
Speaker 2: to be joined as always by my co host mister
Speaker 2: Miles Grell Ray aka.
Speaker 4: All e lawns, things, true grifts, dupe schemes, rules with
Speaker 4: clenched fist.
Speaker 2: All right, No, Dick, I wait no, don't.
Speaker 4: For amplow watches waiting to blame it on JD. Penis,
Speaker 4: won't go cyber drugs. Blow keeps a little mask off
Speaker 4: Torso's wet dough. Okay, shout out on salad Torso's wet dough.
Speaker 2: Swet do and then he did add that go back
Speaker 2: God back, God back, God back God.
Speaker 1: Jim Ross WWE style. Uh for that outro, But anyway,
Speaker 1: thanks helse one on the Discord server.
Speaker 5: Oh.
Speaker 1: Also, I know a lot of y'all I've i've please
Speaker 1: hit me up. There's a new batch of people being like,
Speaker 1: how do I get on the Discord server? D m
Speaker 1: me on Blue Sky. I know I still have some,
Speaker 1: but message me there and I will get you.
Speaker 2: Discord Discord is about the Gremlins two up in there.
Speaker 2: The new batch is coming. They do not know how
Speaker 2: that there's a sports one as heels on.
Speaker 1: It's very pretty and horny. That was my favorite gremlin.
Speaker 2: Yeah, Miles were thrilled to be joined in our third
Speaker 2: seat once again by one of our favorite guests, a
Speaker 2: very funny writer and comic whose comedy has been highlighted
Speaker 2: in Vulture, The La Times. I use one of Illuminative's
Speaker 2: twenty five Native American comedians to follow.
Speaker 1: You can catch him at the.
Speaker 2: Siren Theater in Portland on Saturday, May twenty fourth, and
Speaker 2: you can go check out his podcast, Sage Based Wisdom. Now,
Speaker 2: please welcome back to the show, the hilarious and talented.
Speaker 5: Brian by him right, Hell, yeah, what's up? Do you
Speaker 5: want to come out as saying? Oatmeal raising kerkies are
Speaker 5: the closest thing we have to dog treats as humans
Speaker 5: like you. It tastes like what a dog would love.
Speaker 1: It's great. I love oatmeal, like I'll eat oatmeal like, yeah,
Speaker 1: I was raised on oatmeal for breakfast, so it's not
Speaker 1: I don't like them, and I'll even eat raisin. But
Speaker 1: like together, this is not a treat and oatmeal is
Speaker 1: not a treat. Yeah, oatmeal is just my realna.
Speaker 5: Lie.
Speaker 1: Really, what are you putting in that ship? I'll put
Speaker 1: like chocolate milky ship in there.
Speaker 2: You put chocolate milk in your oatmeal.
Speaker 5: It is the perfect foundation for anything sweet. Like if
Speaker 5: anything else there you can. I put like peanut butter
Speaker 5: in there.
Speaker 2: Sometimes, you guys, I need to step my own go
Speaker 2: with ital was my oatmeal was like a thing that
Speaker 2: a doctor once told me I had to eat because
Speaker 2: my cholesterol was too high. I have, like, you know,
Speaker 2: hereditarily high cholesterol and it works, but I just like
Speaker 2: always associated it with being like a fucking steak. I
Speaker 2: was down there.
Speaker 1: My dad would be instant oatmeal with boiling water and
Speaker 1: then to cool it off a splash of milk, and
Speaker 1: so I was raised on the splash of milk to
Speaker 1: cool off the oatmeal, and then that escalated. I said,
Speaker 1: want to put some chocolate, I want to put some
Speaker 1: eggnogg in here, some other ship and it all goes.
Speaker 5: I will say that my favorite cookie is the white
Speaker 5: chocolate chip macadamia from.
Speaker 1: From somewhere you went specific reason those are so good?
Speaker 1: Are goaded? Yeah, although I'm not going to eat that
Speaker 1: foot long one that they're trying to push. I'm like, bro,
Speaker 1: just keep it regular. I don't need a cookie.
Speaker 2: Yes, there's a long. Every long is our brand. We're
Speaker 2: doing foot long nachos now doritos nachos its.
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's really bad. Any thoughts on what the end
Speaker 1: of April should be. If, like, if April first is
Speaker 1: April Fools, I felt like I saw you maybe winding
Speaker 1: up to chime in there when we were talking about it.
Speaker 5: In case I was maybe April. I think you're on
Speaker 5: the right track with honesty, right, maybe April April cools. Oh,
Speaker 5: it's kind of cool. You're so cool, you're just brutally honest.
Speaker 2: Oh, a little April Fools is a little weird. Al
Speaker 2: it's like not trying to be cool. It's just like
Speaker 2: a little nerdy. It's a little like.
Speaker 1: It's a little like doey oi if yah, Like.
Speaker 5: We're wearing Hawaiian shirts.
Speaker 2: Yeah, like that, we're.
Speaker 5: Acting like it.
Speaker 2: April April Cools is just like a day where you
Speaker 2: get to be cool as fucking like, tell people the truth.
Speaker 1: You're Yeah, you're smoking a filterless Newport because you rip
Speaker 1: the filter off because you're animal like that. And then
Speaker 1: you're looking at the dude, I could totally I definitely
Speaker 1: know why your parents got divorced. Yeah, exactly, they were
Speaker 1: wrong to you. All right, Ryan, We're thrilled to have you.
Speaker 1: We're going to get to know you a little bit better.
Speaker 1: In a moment.
Speaker 2: First, a couple of stories that we're talking about. There
Speaker 2: was a good idea proposed by Amazon that I could
Speaker 2: see them doing and other companies following, except they got
Speaker 2: yelled at by Trump and so now they're not doing
Speaker 2: it anymore because authoritarianism works.
Speaker 1: What's selling Nazi merchandise?
Speaker 2: No, so they already do that. Oh okay, it's to
Speaker 2: put the amount that your price went up based on
Speaker 2: the tariffs, like on the price, so you should so
Speaker 2: you know what, and why wouldn't they like we're that way.
Speaker 2: They're not catching shit for like the price going up,
Speaker 2: and they're not you know, they're not chaining then, so
Speaker 2: like they just anyways, it's a good idea, and one
Speaker 2: angry phone call from Donald Trump to Jeff Bezos and
Speaker 2: that idea is over. I do hope like other companies
Speaker 2: that aren't run by tech all guards who are trying
Speaker 2: to be best friends with Donald Trump might might pick
Speaker 2: us up. But real good kind of window into how
Speaker 2: things work that we'll look at, as well as just
Speaker 2: like what what's going on in the White House. It
Speaker 2: seems like it's just a lot of coddling, a lot
Speaker 2: of codling of a.
Speaker 5: Yeah, where's I have a question. Yeah, I don't know
Speaker 5: if you guys want to answer this.
Speaker 1: We are money to the podcast.
Speaker 5: Do your cariffs go to the government? No, where do
Speaker 5: they use the tariffs go to the extra money that
Speaker 5: it's being paid.
Speaker 1: I guess they do go to the government, right, Oh
Speaker 1: in terms of who's paying the yes, yes, yes, you
Speaker 1: don't getting the money that is that's collected by that's
Speaker 1: collected by customs.
Speaker 2: Which is part of the government. Yes, yes, yes, and then.
Speaker 5: Customs is going to come rolling next time I go through.
Speaker 5: Customs are all gonna be wearing like four chains exactly.
Speaker 2: Customs just all of a sudden, like super expensive sunglasses on.
Speaker 2: They have like people handling their ship for them.
Speaker 1: Yeah, it basically I think what they Customs collects it,
Speaker 1: but then it goes to like a thing the treasure.
Speaker 1: It ultimately like the treasury.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and then that gets redistributed to all of us.
Speaker 1: Right, No, no, that goes well, I mean, sure, Jack, whichever,
Speaker 1: which version do you want me to tell you about it?
Speaker 2: Version? Tell me appy it's going to be.
Speaker 1: It's they are drinking our collective fucking milkshake right now.
Speaker 2: With that, they just go, yeah, thank you all up
Speaker 2: here now yeah, sounding like that milkshake was going up
Speaker 2: your nose. Man, I'm not gonna lie to you.
Speaker 1: Hey man, Look so how I get down, man, And.
Speaker 2: We'll talk about the debate that is once again raging
Speaker 2: on the internet. One hundred man versus one gorilla. It's
Speaker 2: an old debate, but all of a sudden, it was like,
Speaker 2: I don't know, it was like someone you know, when
Speaker 2: like a big news event happens and you check Twitter
Speaker 2: and it's just like ten straight tweets that are all
Speaker 2: about the same thing. That's what I got yesterday from
Speaker 2: this old like Reddit post. Like suddenly, just like.
Speaker 1: Oh so people, I saw like a black Twitter post
Speaker 1: about one hundred guys fighting one gorilla over the weekend,
Speaker 1: and I thought maybe it was that. But also the Internet,
Speaker 1: everything happened in cycles.
Speaker 2: So yeah, yeah, well it's just an old debate, but
Speaker 2: it like this old idea flared up over the weekend
Speaker 2: and now we are. Everybody was talking about it, so
Speaker 2: we're going to talk about it.
Speaker 1: Thoughts has not changed, My thoughts will never change.
Speaker 2: We don't write the zeitgeist. We just report on it, folks.
Speaker 2: So we'll talk about that all of that plenty more.
Speaker 2: But first, Brian Bahi, we do like to ask our guest,
Speaker 2: what is something from your search history that's revealing about.
Speaker 1: Who you are?
Speaker 5: My search history lately, I've been I've been going down
Speaker 5: this rabbit hole of TikTok's giving me a lot of
Speaker 5: sports content lately, and I'm seeing a lot of edits
Speaker 5: of like basketball players from like the nineties, and so
Speaker 5: I was looking up Jordan Ones. I'm in the market
Speaker 5: for some Jordan on wo as somebody who who has
Speaker 5: almost no familiarity with the game of basketball, or weeks
Speaker 5: only just from two weeks of watching clips on TikTok
Speaker 5: am I now attempting to make this my entire identity.
Speaker 1: This feels like exactly why brands love social media, Like
Speaker 1: this comedian we've got fuck all about basketball trying to
Speaker 1: buy ones. Now look what we did with the algorithm. Wait,
Speaker 1: so what happened? What exactly got piqued your interest about
Speaker 1: the Jordan WANs from these videos? Like you just kept
Speaker 1: seeing the shoe over and over and you're like.
Speaker 5: No, I'm just like trying. I'm like, what's like because
Speaker 5: I feel like lately the sports content has been kind
Speaker 5: of it's been hitting a home run in a way.
Speaker 5: There's the Woman's College Playoffs was huge for me. There
Speaker 5: was the PGA.
Speaker 1: PGA was huge for YouTube. That was a huge, huge,
Speaker 1: yes putting.
Speaker 5: For some reason, I was like getting a lot of
Speaker 5: it and I was like, this is really like heartwarming
Speaker 5: to me. And then somehow out of that I like
Speaker 5: went down. I think it's because of the the women's
Speaker 5: college I've just like slowly like more basketball stuff just
Speaker 5: giving to me and I'm eating it up. I'm just
Speaker 5: watching it, you know. There there it's almost like watching
Speaker 5: skateboarding videos in a way where it's like it's like
Speaker 5: fun music is being.
Speaker 1: Over all these something.
Speaker 5: Okay, I'm like, wait, that's that's really that speaks.
Speaker 1: To me, right, Yeah, and then now Jordan One's now
Speaker 1: you're in the market for Jordan one in the market.
Speaker 2: I mean you were watching some old ship if you
Speaker 2: saw somebody playing basketball and Jordan One's right, I don't
Speaker 2: think NBA heard Yeah, the Converse All Stars back when
Speaker 2: the NBA was a race war. Yes, Oh you're not
Speaker 2: in the right So it's srubreddits if you don't think
Speaker 2: it is. Still I was just like watching I guess
Speaker 2: it was a podcast. It's like one of those things
Speaker 2: that's basically just like a YouTube channel where like people
Speaker 2: talk and like it was like a twenty minute clip
Speaker 2: of a guy just naming all the top scorers by
Speaker 2: white guys in NBA history by season.
Speaker 1: For It's like, what the fuck, what a weird what
Speaker 1: a weird rain man trait to happen? I know, like
Speaker 1: white supremacist sports rain man. Yeah, I only know the
Speaker 1: white guys.
Speaker 2: Googliata man, there's a name you don't hear very often anyway. Yeah,
Speaker 2: Tom googli Otta was on.
Speaker 5: There nineties because that name sounds very familiar.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it was the nineties. Yeah, what is bringing this about? Bro?
Speaker 2: You just the sports content entered your feet and you
Speaker 2: started fucking with it? Or is there like I think,
Speaker 2: are you hanging out like a bunch of sportos now, yeah,
Speaker 2: hanging out at the fort side.
Speaker 1: Wild Wings, yeahs and Hooters.
Speaker 5: I think it's also just like the this like hashtag
Speaker 5: like Hope Core of it all.
Speaker 1: Like oh, so you're like, oh, you're seeing Hope core.
Speaker 5: Sports at Hope Core.
Speaker 1: Okay, the best of the best for some reason.
Speaker 5: Uh, that's where I am mentally right now, that makes sense?
Speaker 1: We all, I thought you because like the agro straight
Speaker 1: guy versions I see on TikTok are the ones that
Speaker 1: start off with like heavily edited Brazilian biley funk songs.
Speaker 1: It's like.
Speaker 2: And it's like Boom.
Speaker 1: Dunking a bunch, and I'm like, yeah, Alan dunking a bunch,
Speaker 1: Like that's just weird. It's just like weird.
Speaker 2: Al was a problem. You guys don't never realize it,
Speaker 2: like you.
Speaker 1: Like, it feels like just AI is making remember something
Speaker 1: where like yo, check out yea three point shooting.
Speaker 2: By the way, we gotta If you listen to Doctor
Speaker 2: Carrie Mcinernie's episode yesterday, she followed she hit us and
Speaker 2: followed up with like a couple of articles about AI
Speaker 2: and like what it's going, what they're trying to do
Speaker 2: to us to like our free will. There's like a
Speaker 2: intention market where they're like, anyways, well we will have
Speaker 2: on that story coming soon. But it's terrifying. All right, Well,
Speaker 2: Jordan want's a classic shoe.
Speaker 1: What size you guys have him? I got a pair.
Speaker 1: I got a pair. Yeah, I had a pair, but
Speaker 1: then they burned in the fire and then a comedian
Speaker 1: shout out Ian Carmel, he gave me a pair of
Speaker 1: Jordan One's the Shadow, the Great Shadow Ones, Gray Black. Yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: the Great Black was nice.
Speaker 3: Yeah.
Speaker 1: Yeah, they're very narrow. If you have wide feet, I would,
Speaker 1: I would, I would advise to size up.
Speaker 5: I actually do have narrow feet.
Speaker 1: Oh then you are found your ship. You're gonna love.
Speaker 5: I'm kind of like Jordan's like that.
Speaker 1: Narrow feet. Yeah, sure, terrible gambling problem. I like they're
Speaker 1: very versatile to the Jordan Ones. Well, now they're just
Speaker 1: they're so that silhouette is just so timeless. Now it's
Speaker 1: just like sneaker shape.
Speaker 2: Yeah. Like all those what's that one shoe that you
Speaker 2: can buy that looks like it's been beat to ship
Speaker 2: and it costs like five hundred.
Speaker 1: Dollars Golden Goose.
Speaker 2: Yeah yeah, like those are all basically like their high
Speaker 2: tops all look like Jordan Ones.
Speaker 1: I feel like, yeah, the Blazers, it's all Yeah, is
Speaker 1: the biggest red flag I've ever seen on a human being.
Speaker 2: Yeahbody's wearing that.
Speaker 5: I'm like, I'm crossing the street.
Speaker 1: It's so weird to like cosplay, like I'm living in
Speaker 1: these like these clothing items to buy like pre distressed things.
Speaker 1: I'm just like, yeah, no, I've got plenty of distress
Speaker 1: to go around.
Speaker 2: I don't know, I don't need you doing the better.
Speaker 1: Be like Matt Damon at the end of Private Ryan and.
Speaker 2: Earn this, earn this Golden Goose. What is something you
Speaker 2: think is underrated? Brian?
Speaker 5: So I'm watching the Pit. I'm kind of really into
Speaker 5: the pit. Shout out emergency rooms, Yeah, shout out Ivy drips.
Speaker 5: And it's like it's reminding me that, like I feel
Speaker 5: like we've spent so much time in media, like really
Speaker 5: kind of loving the anti hero and somebody that's just
Speaker 5: like digging themselves in this hole and then trying to
Speaker 5: get out of the hole. Yeah, like I forgot there's
Speaker 5: like really cool stories about people that are actually like
Speaker 5: doing well and trying to do Yeah for people, this
Speaker 5: is actually what's up?
Speaker 2: Wait, so, like, what what drug problems does this doctor have?
Speaker 5: There's no drug he needs that he actually he actually
Speaker 5: just helped too many people during COVID.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I need at least a light drug problem. He
Speaker 2: needs to be doing it while drunk has ended.
Speaker 5: I think it has, but I haven't finished it.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it really connected like every way. Yeah, Yeah, there's
Speaker 2: a preview for it, like a fifteen second teaser that
Speaker 2: like played before something I was watching on Max where
Speaker 2: he's like going to take a piss in the bathroom
Speaker 2: and somebody's like there's an emergency and he has to
Speaker 2: like stop himself from pissing to like go deal with
Speaker 2: the emergency. That's That's that dedication that stressed me out. Man.
Speaker 1: That's someone you can sign up to fight a gorilla
Speaker 1: with you And.
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's right if you can start there just ten
Speaker 2: of them. I feel like the whole the gorilla question
Speaker 2: really comes down to whether you're able to do the
Speaker 2: thing that we love seeing an action movie's and assemble
Speaker 2: a team, you know, like do you get to go out?
Speaker 2: Because the original question was like no, it's just a
Speaker 2: random group of a hundred. But I think if we
Speaker 2: can select our team, we might have a chance.
Speaker 1: I will clone Lawrence Taylor on Crack. Lawrence Taylor is
Speaker 1: the first fifty I need, Laurence what I'm thinking Lawrence
Speaker 1: and waylor wait football coach and the primatologist. Those are
Speaker 1: three the three things that I'm able to assemble the team.
Speaker 2: Yeah, those are the three first picks you need.
Speaker 5: I would pick ten people with you know, those grip strength, things. Yea,
Speaker 5: how strong a grip is. I think that's really what's key,
Speaker 5: because grill is going to try to fling you off.
Speaker 5: If your grip is strong, you're gonna hang on.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: Okay, So like people who do like rock climbing, they
Speaker 1: have sane grip strength. Yeah yeah, yeah, yeah, you're.
Speaker 2: So good and like the running the approach, like if
Speaker 2: they're like this, I mean, guys, this is why this
Speaker 2: is why.
Speaker 1: No, maybe I'm back, damn it. Maybe I'm back about
Speaker 1: it just a little bit harder.
Speaker 2: Brian, what is some what do you think is overrated? Oh?
Speaker 5: Yeah, so that that my pit thing was anti heroes.
Speaker 5: I think they're overrated. We're done with it. Leave that
Speaker 5: ship in when we weren't in the Age of Aquarius.
Speaker 5: Because we are in the Age of Aquarius. It's currently
Speaker 5: as of a few months ago.
Speaker 2: That's great news for me.
Speaker 5: Is that good?
Speaker 1: That's from hair, It's great.
Speaker 5: It's when all the it's like historically, I don't know
Speaker 5: anything about what I'm talking about.
Speaker 3: But.
Speaker 5: Historically it's when like huge like revolutions and shit happened.
Speaker 1: All right, Oh hell yeah, I think we kind of
Speaker 1: need that right now, guys.
Speaker 2: Low key, I think we need that right now. All right?
Speaker 2: So that was your under overted? Underrated?
Speaker 1: Is the pit?
Speaker 2: Overrated? Is he anti heroes?
Speaker 5: No? Underrated?
Speaker 3: Was uh? Fuck?
Speaker 5: I actually forget what I just said.
Speaker 1: No did you say the pit?
Speaker 5: No? The pit was me leading into anti heroes? I
Speaker 5: think anti overrated and underrated? Is something else?
Speaker 2: Is the pit? Wait?
Speaker 5: Oh oh wait I this processed food?
Speaker 2: Oh that's okay, So let's do that. Okay, okay, So
Speaker 2: I think we flipped your overrated and underrated? What what's
Speaker 2: something you think is underrated?
Speaker 1: Okay?
Speaker 2: Processed?
Speaker 1: Which one? What kind? What's the most underrated process food?
Speaker 2: I think like cheese, processed cheese, American cheese.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm just kind of like over it's like one, yeah,
Speaker 1: American just oil and water in the shape of it.
Speaker 2: I fucking I am fully in agreement that I love
Speaker 2: American cheese. Like the melt the melting point on that
Speaker 2: ship is so crucial, Like, yes, I guess, and I
Speaker 2: was made in a lab.
Speaker 1: I used to rake my teeth over the edges of
Speaker 1: the plastic to make sure I was getting all that
Speaker 1: cheese off when I was a kid, you know what
Speaker 1: I mean?
Speaker 2: Like, like what's behind stays watching at like room temp.
Speaker 2: It's like melts at room temp is a wild is
Speaker 2: a wild quality for a substance to have.
Speaker 5: Watching the craft singles get squirted into the plastic and
Speaker 5: then the plastic kind of adhering it around it is
Speaker 5: pretty fascinating.
Speaker 1: Poetry. Poetry.
Speaker 5: Yeah, that's the hope core edit that I should be watching.
Speaker 5: I guess.
Speaker 2: I mean we shouldn't be surprised that processed food as
Speaker 2: you're underrated because you said that your favorite cookie is
Speaker 2: white chocolate macadamia nut cookies from somewhere. Yeah, yeah, that's fine.
Speaker 5: They're always moist.
Speaker 1: They are.
Speaker 2: They are, and you know why because they are sprayed
Speaker 2: down with chemicals that aren't available to anybody except No Fortune,
Speaker 2: five hundred corporations and the US military.
Speaker 1: Brian just he trusts the process. That's right.
Speaker 5: You gotta trust the process. I think we need to
Speaker 5: stop having trying to have so much control over everything.
Speaker 1: That's trust the process and right.
Speaker 2: Control works in the short term. Long term, it's a
Speaker 2: bad strategy. It's gonna it's gonna fuck you up trying
Speaker 2: to control everything just to let it go. Eat the
Speaker 2: fucking processed food.
Speaker 1: Trust the process.
Speaker 2: Trust the process, and we we know how well that
Speaker 2: worked out for the seventy six ers, so it'll probably
Speaker 2: work out for all of us as well.
Speaker 1: That's my basketball team, bro, you need a hope core
Speaker 1: sixers at it? Man, really, I do not.
Speaker 2: I'm going over here.
Speaker 1: I'm dead man.
Speaker 2: I need to think about that ship for a little while. Yeah,
Speaker 2: all right, great to have you back, Brian. We're gonna
Speaker 2: take a quick break. We're gonna come back. We're gonna
Speaker 2: talk about some of this news. You heard about this
Speaker 2: stuff the news. We'll be right back.
Speaker 1: And we're back and.
Speaker 2: Yeah. So corporation, one of the big corporations, stumbled on
Speaker 2: an idea, yeah, that I think would have served both
Speaker 2: them and consumers. I think, you know, it would have
Speaker 2: like enlightened consumers a little bit. The idea is to
Speaker 2: put the cost that the tariffs were costing the amount
Speaker 2: of the tariffs were costing people onto each item. So
Speaker 2: the thing that used to be seven dollars is now
Speaker 2: thirteen dollars. They just say the tariff surcharge is six dollars,
Speaker 2: and people understand, well, I guess that wasn't Amazon's fault
Speaker 2: that everything's more expensive.
Speaker 1: It's just their fault that they're passing it on to us.
Speaker 2: It is their fault that they're passing around. I mean,
Speaker 2: so that's what Trump was like, Well, a big corporation
Speaker 2: like that, like can't afford the six dollars, And it's like, no,
Speaker 2: that's not how these fucking things work. What are you crazy?
Speaker 1: Actually, the publicly traded company, Yeah, certainly not gonna be
Speaker 1: like yeah, and we will just we will stomach that
Speaker 1: and just dwindle away in our revenue. That's because that's
Speaker 1: how American companies think.
Speaker 2: But anyways, they were thinking about doing that, and then
Speaker 2: they got a call from Daddy, and Donald Trump got
Speaker 2: mad and called them, and they immediately backtracked and pretended
Speaker 2: Stalin style. Not only do they are they like, no,
Speaker 2: we're not going to do that anymore. They're like, that
Speaker 2: never happened. We were never considering doing that.
Speaker 1: Who told you that they're probably all fucked up on
Speaker 1: drugs or something, because that was ever going to happen.
Speaker 2: The person who says that disappears from all pictures past
Speaker 2: and future just cut it out of it.
Speaker 5: Was that Hunter was that sounds like something Hunter would say.
Speaker 1: Right, But yeah, like this and see it, and they're saying,
Speaker 1: quote Trump called Bezos to complain about reports that Amazon
Speaker 1: was considering displaying the cost of US tariffs next to
Speaker 1: prices for certain products on the website. The call came
Speaker 1: shortly after one of the senior officials phoned the President
Speaker 1: to inform him of the story quote. Of course, he
Speaker 1: was pissed. One of the officials, who was granted anonymity
Speaker 1: to speak, candidly told CNN, why should a multi why
Speaker 1: should a multi billion dollar company pass off cost to consumers?
Speaker 1: Good course of all, good question. I'm like, really, you're
Speaker 1: really never been to America before, that's the thing you're
Speaker 1: saying out loud and then out a briefing today, White
Speaker 1: House Press Secretary Caroline Levitt called the move quote a
Speaker 1: hostile and political act, adding that she had spoken about
Speaker 1: the matter with President Trump earlier.
Speaker 2: Yes.
Speaker 1: Really, yeah, it sounds like a kind of do you
Speaker 1: think someone actually in the White House saying why should
Speaker 1: a multi billion dollar company pass off cost to consumers?
Speaker 1: The multi billion dollar companies should be absorbing those costs
Speaker 1: to keep prices low. That's completely against the philosophical mission
Speaker 1: of all corporations in America.
Speaker 2: I mean, I agree, yeah, yeah, it's just wildly unrealistic.
Speaker 2: That they're not going to pass it on.
Speaker 1: That's something Elizabeth Warren says right out loud, you know,
Speaker 1: Elizabeth Warren, but like out of the White House again,
Speaker 1: because I think all that, for all of this, the
Speaker 1: thing that they just aren't saying out loud is why
Speaker 1: are you showing the cost of it to make us
Speaker 1: look bad for the dumbest fucking economic policy. People have
Speaker 1: seen this the last few centuries, maybe since the tulip
Speaker 1: fucking the.
Speaker 2: Tulip panic, Yeah, the tulip panic, Like what the fuck
Speaker 2: are y'all talking about tulipmania? Yes, yes, of course tulipmania, Tumania.
Speaker 2: Many people are saying this is the best idea since Tulipmania.
Speaker 3: Right.
Speaker 2: It's also frustrating to me because it's truly unimaginable for
Speaker 2: me that a Democratic president would be able to get
Speaker 2: a corporation to stop what they're doing by yelling at them,
Speaker 2: but also that they would even try, you know, because
Speaker 2: they are the party of the corporations, where they think
Speaker 2: these are their friends.
Speaker 1: I feel like, well, see the Republicans used to but
Speaker 1: in pursuit of like total like a total white ethno state,
Speaker 1: like they have to now be like sorry, y'all like
Speaker 1: you have to do everything we say. Now, that's that's
Speaker 1: just sort of the game at this point. But yeah,
Speaker 1: there's no way. Yeah. I mean, look, Biden could have
Speaker 1: said something when it was clear that quote unquote inflation.
Speaker 1: So much of that was just corporate greed because they
Speaker 1: were just charging more because they knew they could. But yeah,
Speaker 1: I think the most you did it was like they
Speaker 1: got it, they got it, they gotta knock that off.
Speaker 1: Was like kind of like the energy we got from
Speaker 1: the White House.
Speaker 2: Then, I mean, Harris came out and was like, this
Speaker 2: is gonna be a big part of my campaign is
Speaker 2: that like the reason that things inflation was happening. And
Speaker 2: then she got shouted down externally like in the papers
Speaker 2: by you know, economists and quote, and then also internally
Speaker 2: because like one of Doug's brothers or something. I forget
Speaker 2: who it was, but it was like someone who's like
Speaker 2: close to her, not because of like being associated because
Speaker 2: of their job, but because of like a familial or
Speaker 2: like friend connection was like on the board at uber
Speaker 2: or something, you know, like someone influential in the world
Speaker 2: of it's her brother in law. It was her brother
Speaker 2: in law, brother in law came at her and was like,
Speaker 2: this is a bad look for you. This is not
Speaker 2: Wall Street approved, because that was the New York Times
Speaker 2: headline was Harris had a Wall Street approved economic pitch.
Speaker 2: Yes exactly, she.
Speaker 5: Are, Okay, wait, so are the terriffs set up? I
Speaker 5: feel like I'm the six year old in this.
Speaker 1: If you're six five.
Speaker 5: And the terror set up to like make all just
Speaker 5: like manufacturing ship American based.
Speaker 1: And that's like the very abstract idea, but in practice
Speaker 1: it's it's going to take years to get any kind
Speaker 1: of semblance of manufacturing at levels that could be like, well,
Speaker 1: now everything is American made, it's going to take And
Speaker 1: also the cost there's the cost of labor is still
Speaker 1: high in the United States, so everywhere that's not changing
Speaker 1: anything for sure unless we have a total sea change
Speaker 1: of like what we pay people. So because we pay
Speaker 1: the people who work in factories enough that they can
Speaker 1: even pay the prices that's justified by the cost of labor,
Speaker 1: it's all very like it they're just selling a fever
Speaker 1: dream because most people will just stop thinking at the well, yeah, man,
Speaker 1: because then we're gonna start building stuff here, and then
Speaker 1: we're gonna get jobs. And and everything is gonna start
Speaker 1: and it's like that's that ship has set sail.
Speaker 5: It's yeah, it's not gonna happen.
Speaker 1: Yeah, And now American consumers are way too reliant on
Speaker 1: very cheap goods that you're there. It's cheap because the
Speaker 1: places that they're exploiting, the people's labor to make this
Speaker 1: ship is cheap. It is not cheap to do that
Speaker 1: here because they will all a just won't pay people
Speaker 1: living wages. And if they like again, for all of
Speaker 1: that to happen, so many things have to also go
Speaker 1: up to make everything be like, oh well, I can't
Speaker 1: afford this new American made thing because my wages have
Speaker 1: gone up three times.
Speaker 5: Exactly Like if they want to, if that's what they want,
Speaker 5: they need to also do take the steps to make
Speaker 5: it realistic for so many other Yeah.
Speaker 1: Yeah, because this this is like even this is just
Speaker 1: again I think that's where like people sort of thinking
Speaker 1: sort of ends. And now we're at this place now
Speaker 1: where a lot of people are using like the Wiley
Speaker 1: coyote off the cliff meme because shipping from China has
Speaker 1: basically cratered and they're like now see this like pause
Speaker 1: and stuff like of goods that were coming out of
Speaker 1: the hose. Wait till we get to that air gap
Speaker 1: in the hose and nothing's coming out anymore. And that's
Speaker 1: when there's a lot there's gonna be a lot of
Speaker 1: chaos at least for like, you know, the kinds of
Speaker 1: consumer goods that we have important.
Speaker 2: Toilet paper shortage will apply to other things, like this
Speaker 2: is paper shortage from the early pandemic. You're going to
Speaker 2: see that in many different places.
Speaker 1: Yeah, for just like the things that you weren't counting.
Speaker 1: It's like, oh, like cheap toys for kids or things
Speaker 1: like that, like all that kind of stuff, and I
Speaker 1: can do without those.
Speaker 2: Jesus Chris.
Speaker 5: That you get this pretty after two seconds. For kind
Speaker 5: of the action movie industry, because I feel like a
Speaker 5: lot of kind of the act threes in your Fashion
Speaker 5: and Furious Is or something, they all take place in
Speaker 5: like those big metal shipping containers, and we're not using
Speaker 5: those anymore. Then the audience is gonna be like, this
Speaker 5: isn't realistic?
Speaker 2: Yeah exactly. Yeah. So it's among many unpopular ideas that
Speaker 2: the Trump administration is pursued full blast, and I think
Speaker 2: a lot of people have assumed, like slash hoped that, well,
Speaker 2: this is like he Trump's a maverick. He's like a
Speaker 2: He's a capitalist. He knows what he's doing. And the
Speaker 2: reason he's pursuing these is because even though he knows
Speaker 2: they're wildly unpopular, he had he has a gun instinct
Speaker 2: and he's just gonna he's gonna ride with it. And
Speaker 2: we're also seeing reporting that that's not true. He actually
Speaker 2: doesn't realize they're unpopular. He is like a celebrity who's
Speaker 2: been surrounded but it's like the celebrityary Katy Perry, yeah,
Speaker 2: or like a comedian who gets like too famous and
Speaker 2: then like they're the album two albums after they have
Speaker 2: like a house that with like twenty people who work
Speaker 2: for them at it, you know, and then like they
Speaker 2: come out and here was like wait, what this person
Speaker 2: seems like they're on a different planet than me. Like that. Yeah,
Speaker 2: Katy Perry, I guess.
Speaker 1: Disease blissfully unaware of what's happening around him, because like
Speaker 1: the Amazon story, along with the ones about the polls
Speaker 1: and Trump's reaction to them, like the latest pot night
Speaker 1: in the last polls we talked about on the show,
Speaker 1: like the latest ones that came out over the weekend
Speaker 1: in Earli this week again paints this picture of people
Speaker 1: managing his moods to keep things going, and it like
Speaker 1: again that whole thing about like what what the what?
Speaker 1: What's a multi Why isn't a multi billion dollar corporation
Speaker 1: able to stomach that stuff? They're trying to make this
Speaker 1: look bad. Sounds like a thing someone says to Donald
Speaker 1: Trump about like why everything is fucked up?
Speaker 2: And he's right, yeah, then they can afford it. Yeah, yeah,
Speaker 2: Bazos can afford it. Do that.
Speaker 1: Okay, America can afford to give people health care. And okay, so,
Speaker 1: oh so we don't always believe if you can afford it,
Speaker 1: you should do it. So then shut the fuck up. So,
Speaker 1: like the latest polls right the Times is Trump's approval
Speaker 1: rating at forty two percent. The Washington Post has him
Speaker 1: at thirty nine percent. Trump just got on truth social
Speaker 1: and saying stuff like these fake news polls from fake
Speaker 1: news organizations. He said, these organizations are sick and the
Speaker 1: enemy of the people. And he's like the famous Pollar
Speaker 1: pollster John McLaughlin. He's even says these are fake polls
Speaker 1: and then also not mentioning he's like this is a
Speaker 1: guy I hired to do Bypoles this quote unquote famous
Speaker 1: polster mad at Fox and again this is just shock
Speaker 1: like this shock over These numbers are based on living
Speaker 1: in an echo chamber where staff are telling him how
Speaker 1: much he is killing it, and we know how much
Speaker 1: he watches press briefings, and like the way Caroline Levitt talks,
Speaker 1: it's clearly to please the audience of Trump. And I
Speaker 1: think this what the Republicans are doing, especially with Project
Speaker 1: twenty twenty five. They have to destroy a lot of
Speaker 1: these norms in order to get their agenda through in
Speaker 1: the way they see it, you know, happening in their dreams.
Speaker 1: So the best way to get unpopular policies backed by
Speaker 1: the President is to obscure how unpopular they are and
Speaker 1: even straight up lie and tell him that people fucking
Speaker 1: love shit like Doge or the tariffs, or that they
Speaker 1: are not illegal like this shit he's doing with trafficking,
Speaker 1: disappearing immigrants or canceling visas for kids who exercise their
Speaker 1: right to free speech.
Speaker 2: You're the man king, He's in his like fat Elvis
Speaker 2: stage right now, right. I feel like, you know, just like,
Speaker 2: oh man, that was hilarious. Tiny Elvis nineties.
Speaker 1: That was so sick when you roundhouse kicked that mannequin.
Speaker 1: President Trump cool, like, okay, but I mean you look
Speaker 1: at this. One quote right from this is from an
Speaker 1: interview a couple of weeks ago, when Time interviewed Trump.
Speaker 1: This is very telling. This is from Time. Quote the
Speaker 1: Supreme Court ruled that. This is them asking about kill
Speaker 1: mar Abrego Garcia. This is the person asking Trump the
Speaker 1: Supreme Court ruled that you have to bring kill mar
Speaker 1: Abrego Garcia back. Aren't you disobeying the Supreme Court? Trump responded, quote,
Speaker 1: That's not what my people told me. They say that
Speaker 1: this Nino decision was something very different and actually was
Speaker 1: something in my favor.
Speaker 2: Which, like we saw that and we assumed that that
Speaker 2: was they were joking, right, Like we saw him say,
Speaker 2: oh like that. Somebody asked him about the Supreme Court
Speaker 2: and he was like that that was for us, right,
Speaker 2: and they were like, yeah, yeah, boss, that's for us,
Speaker 2: And then everybody kind of laughed, Like I didn't think
Speaker 2: that he actually believed that this Nino decision that went
Speaker 2: against him was actually for him.
Speaker 1: That's it.
Speaker 2: That's like a startling lack of content with reality.
Speaker 1: It is if your brain is the consistency of Nickelodeon
Speaker 1: floam from the early nineties, and you are so senile
Speaker 1: that truly you just the repetition of a sentence will
Speaker 1: then become your reality. That's like what this totally is.
Speaker 1: Because he's even like what illegal, No, that's not He
Speaker 1: always says a thing is like not, My people told
Speaker 1: me that that's that's not the case, when it's like,
Speaker 1: oh are they? They're telling you this. This makes sense.
Speaker 1: Not to excuse anything what Trump's doing, but I think
Speaker 1: it just shows his mental state, and these people are
Speaker 1: basically realizing, Okay, we can get him to do really
Speaker 1: unpopular shit if we lie about it, and then when
Speaker 1: the shit hits the fan freak out and then dial
Speaker 1: back things like the tariffs or him softening his stance
Speaker 1: on China or whatever. But yeah, it's a coddling old
Speaker 1: man day every.
Speaker 5: Day inside of manifesting in a way.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean that the only people who are allowed
Speaker 2: to manifest are these like massive CEOs and like the
Speaker 2: people who have just like lucked them their way into
Speaker 2: being like the one in a million who like actually
Speaker 2: succeed all the way in capitalism, and then they become
Speaker 2: surrounded by a bunch of people who are just managing them,
Speaker 2: you know, and just like trying, like trying to create
Speaker 2: whatever they think that person.
Speaker 1: Wants to see.
Speaker 2: It's like the whole world of celebrity. It's the whole
Speaker 2: world of like the people who are like billionaires are
Speaker 2: have not been anywhere in the realm of reality for
Speaker 2: you know, since they hit a billion dollars, you know. Yeah,
Speaker 2: And he's like all of those things combined. He's a celebrity, billionaire, CEO, president,
Speaker 2: and like he's just so insulated.
Speaker 5: He's like the Gecko Geico in a way. He's kind
Speaker 5: of just like.
Speaker 1: Hmm, go on in many ways, fake accent even no,
Speaker 1: but it is like what you're saying, Jack, it's the same.
Speaker 1: It's like having a terrible entourage a celebrity. Like at
Speaker 1: a certain point, all those people you hire, they realize
Speaker 1: they have to keep the money hose on for their
Speaker 1: like for like their livelihoods too, and they're like, yeah,
Speaker 1: take that gig, Yeah, do this, do this, because I
Speaker 1: need you to be working for me to get a check,
Speaker 1: so like we'll fucking do whatever. And unfortunately, like you're saying,
Speaker 1: it's now all kind of coming together in the form
Speaker 1: of a presidency.
Speaker 2: Like as Brian pointed out, like the Geico Gecko, like
Speaker 2: the the number one celebrity who's like around the poisonous
Speaker 2: on trot, like the Geico Geckos, like a massive coke
Speaker 2: problem that like I mean, that's been document.
Speaker 1: I don't know if we should justin maybe let's cut that.
Speaker 1: I don't want to.
Speaker 2: I don't want to like with you know, we we care,
Speaker 2: like it's he gets.
Speaker 5: He's so very well connected and like you know, the
Speaker 5: dark underbelly of.
Speaker 1: Yeah Salamander or society.
Speaker 2: He said, Ducks disappeared just for you know, looking like
Speaker 2: the affleck do. But he is, as Gilbert Godfrey, what happened?
Speaker 2: It's just like, oh you thought those are natural clues.
Speaker 2: I yeah, we hope he gets the help he needs,
Speaker 2: but like with the entourage around him that he has,
Speaker 2: like you know, it's just a bunch of people paid
Speaker 2: to get him to the next commercial gig and like
Speaker 2: keep him from flipping out.
Speaker 1: But think about, like at his coke think about like
Speaker 1: if you I don't know, this is like a weird example,
Speaker 1: but like if your grandparents are like babysitting you and
Speaker 1: your bunch of friends and like, dude, my grandpa's fucking
Speaker 1: out of it. Dude, he will drive us to buy fireworks.
Speaker 1: They tell him they're legal and actually you can play
Speaker 1: with them at thirteen years old and not eighteen.
Speaker 2: Watch.
Speaker 1: Yeah, dude, grandpa, can you take us to get fireworks?
Speaker 1: I thought that you're too young. No, they just changed
Speaker 1: the law that you can actually be nine years old
Speaker 1: and handle fireworks. Oh okay, can we go? Sure? Like
Speaker 1: that's the same thing. It's like, can we like disappear
Speaker 1: a bunch of immigrants right now? And I don't know
Speaker 1: if Trump's first reaction is like, that's unconscionable, but they're
Speaker 1: gonna be like it's people are gonna fucking love it.
Speaker 1: And then he's like, oh, well they're gonna love it sure,
Speaker 1: And I'm not. I don't. I don't have enough critical
Speaker 1: thinking skills to really do anything else. And it aligns
Speaker 1: with my slight desire to, you know, mistreat people of color.
Speaker 1: So yeah, let's go fire cloud of power that like
Speaker 1: has no center to it, and everyone else trying to like, yeah,
Speaker 1: it's like a vape cloud that they're just trying to
Speaker 1: push in one direction.
Speaker 2: I mean vape vape clouds are cool compared to it.
Speaker 2: That's true. Yeah, let's take a quick break and we'll
Speaker 2: be right back to talk about what's on everybody's mind,
Speaker 2: the debate over one one hundred person one gorilla. We'll
Speaker 2: be right back, and we're back.
Speaker 1: We're back.
Speaker 2: I do just at the the Floam reference smiles. I
Speaker 2: don't want that to go by without being remarked on.
Speaker 1: It's okay, Like I said, check my bio encyclopedic knowledge
Speaker 1: of the nineties.
Speaker 5: Is that the one that would like that would almost
Speaker 5: like crack when you molded it.
Speaker 1: Yeah, it was like a bunch of little beads almost
Speaker 1: like held together.
Speaker 2: It was really what if.
Speaker 1: Rice Krispy Treats was toy you know what if Rice
Speaker 1: Krispy Treats gave you bowel problems, if you even touched
Speaker 1: your mouth after handling it. It's if you ate them.
Speaker 2: They were in your body for the rest of your
Speaker 2: life and also your children's lives somehow your progeny.
Speaker 1: Also.
Speaker 5: Now every third person is like gooning to as Mr
Speaker 5: Shit and we have we have Floam to thank for that.
Speaker 1: I know, right exactly. We were just out here just
Speaker 1: trying to figure it out on our own with Nickelodeon Floam.
Speaker 1: I gave it the full brand name because I felt
Speaker 1: like people would forget if I didn't properly say Nickelodeon Floam.
Speaker 2: Nickelodeon Floam, a larger and larger part of their body
Speaker 2: is just made out of floam, like instead of a
Speaker 2: left knee. I have flown down there. I can just
Speaker 2: mold it and remold it as I walk. Anyways, old debate,
Speaker 2: and this is not this is not the story that
Speaker 2: I thought I was going to be talking about today.
Speaker 2: And yet, like I said, we report on the zeitgeist,
Speaker 2: we don't make it. Yesterday I had the experience of
Speaker 2: checking social media and it just being wall to wall
Speaker 2: one hundred men versus one gorilla, you know, commentary videos,
Speaker 2: and so this is an old debate. I mean this
Speaker 2: sort of debate.
Speaker 5: You know.
Speaker 2: There was one of my favorite articles from the early
Speaker 2: days of Cracked, like two thousand and eight Cracked, I think,
Speaker 2: was by this writer Chris Buckles, that was just like
Speaker 2: how to fight twenty children like as one person, And
Speaker 2: it was just like really well thought out and good
Speaker 2: advice that i've that has shaped me as a person.
Speaker 5: Used.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, I'll link off to that as my work
Speaker 2: in media. But it is kind of one of those
Speaker 2: questions like once you start thinking about it, it's kind
Speaker 2: of hard to stop. I will say, the original question,
Speaker 2: as originally posed on Reddit five years ago, I think
Speaker 2: has a fairly simple answer because they really stacked the
Speaker 2: deck against the humans. Oh yeah, yeah. The original question
Speaker 2: was like, all right, first round, you can only go
Speaker 2: two at a two men at a time, yeah, and
Speaker 2: they're in a grilla exhibit. The second one is in
Speaker 2: a construction as at a construction site, and you can
Speaker 2: go ten at a time. They also say that it
Speaker 2: just has to be like one hundred average people. And
Speaker 2: then the third one, I guess you can go all
Speaker 2: at once, but you're not going to have many people
Speaker 2: left after those first two rounds to go all at once,
Speaker 2: which is like really your only hope.
Speaker 1: I think all of the sort of modifiers are meaningless
Speaker 1: because really the question is how can what just in
Speaker 1: a in a fair one? Okay, no tools, no weapons,
Speaker 1: not because this guy is basically bringing up like rainbow
Speaker 1: road type ship where like the headrilla fall off the
Speaker 1: edge or some ship. No, what is it going to
Speaker 1: take for one hundred human beings? To beat the fuck
Speaker 1: out of a gorilla.
Speaker 2: Yeah, like a cage match or something like that.
Speaker 1: Yeah, you know, yeah, And my first reaction is it's
Speaker 1: not happening. It's not happening. Ever, my big thing with
Speaker 1: all of this is human beings don't have like fangs.
Speaker 1: They cannot draw blood. So you're you're you're counting on
Speaker 1: purely overpowering a gorilla. I mean, we do have thangs, moms,
Speaker 1: but can you okay, can you can you draw blood
Speaker 1: from a through that gorilla's fur?
Speaker 2: Probably if I had to, if he stayed still, if
Speaker 2: he stayed still, if I hit the finger real hard
Speaker 2: like Charlie, yeah, I probably could. I can bite through
Speaker 2: a lot I got.
Speaker 1: But I'm just saying that's how I see a gorilla somehow,
Speaker 1: like if it fought a tiger's because the tiger slashes
Speaker 1: the gorilla and is like it's leaking in a straight
Speaker 1: up hold the gorilla. Fucking hundred people aren't doing that.
Speaker 1: The first guy that gets ripped in fucking half by
Speaker 1: this thing, all people are gonna go, h no, right,
Speaker 1: you need all these other things that I think you need.
Speaker 2: I think first of all, we need to we need
Speaker 2: a draft, like and not not a like military's where
Speaker 2: we're going by birthday. I think we need to mcgoover's style,
Speaker 2: get to put together a team mcgroov of the film,
Speaker 2: not the SNL sketch, Oh thank you, which the film,
Speaker 2: the film sketch. The sketch is a completely different thing.
Speaker 2: The film is a work of art. The you know,
Speaker 2: I think we need to be able to intentionally assemble
Speaker 2: a team. I think there needs to be some sort
Speaker 2: of a squid Game style motivation that is going to
Speaker 2: prevent what you're talking about where they see a person
Speaker 2: get ripped in half and everybody's like, this is not
Speaker 2: worth it. It needs to be worth Like it needs
Speaker 2: to be one hundred men and the grill are in
Speaker 2: the cage and like it's not over until.
Speaker 1: It would be sick in squid Game, like in the
Speaker 1: actual like a new season of squid Game, Like when
Speaker 1: there's like four hundred people left, it's like all four
Speaker 1: hundred y'all versus gorilla right now, right, Yeah, a lot
Speaker 1: of y'all are going to die, a lot of y'all
Speaker 1: going to die. But four hundred four hundred feels like maybe.
Speaker 2: Four hundred, So how are you? I don't even know
Speaker 2: what hundred is different than one hundred other than like, I.
Speaker 1: Feel like a gorilla killing three hundred people with its
Speaker 1: bare hands may tire the gorilla out get tired, and
Speaker 1: then the other ones are just like coming up and
Speaker 1: like kind of yeah, I feel like that would probably be.
Speaker 2: True after like fifty right, like that, that's a lot
Speaker 2: of people to kill.
Speaker 5: I could see that. I almost think now, I think
Speaker 5: you could almost it can be. It can almost be
Speaker 5: a random assortment of one hundred people. It doesn't they don't.
Speaker 5: You don't even need to do a draft. You just
Speaker 5: need a coach that's like like a maestro, Yes, a
Speaker 5: maestro who's running plays and basically the goal of every
Speaker 5: play is somebody goes for the eyes. I think once
Speaker 5: you get the eyes.
Speaker 2: Brian, Okay, that is right, it's gotta be the eyes.
Speaker 2: Although all right, so this is what I'm saying, you
Speaker 2: gotta be the eyes. Like that convinced me in a
Speaker 2: split second. At first, I was like, we need a
Speaker 2: like legendary football coach.
Speaker 1: I think is the coach?
Speaker 2: No, I know, well, now I'm thinking we need still
Speaker 2: still I want Mike Tomlin. Mike Tomlin from the Steelers
Speaker 2: and like just every year they have a terrible team.
Speaker 2: Everyone's like, these guys are gonna win two games this year,
Speaker 2: and every year they are like a two seed, right,
Speaker 2: And he's just has out energy. He like yells at
Speaker 2: everybody cut your eyelids off, cut your eyelids off when
Speaker 2: they go out to play, which is just like this,
Speaker 2: So I don't know. And and also a great tactician,
Speaker 2: although we might not need one with Brian.
Speaker 1: No, I do know this.
Speaker 2: Brian has absolutely I just thinking primatologist would be helpful,
Speaker 2: like somebody who sure, yeah, can really speak to it,
Speaker 2: but like a primatologists where you've like you know, kidnapped
Speaker 2: their kid, because other way they're going to be like,
Speaker 2: we should let the gorilla kill us.
Speaker 1: Yeah, because I don't want to introduce like you know,
Speaker 1: there could be something like gorillas hate like reflective material
Speaker 1: or something like maybe like a non weapon object that
Speaker 1: evens it up. But I don't even like that idea
Speaker 1: because now we're not talking we're talking about one hundred people. Yes,
Speaker 1: one hundred people with tools can beat in a gorilla
Speaker 1: right with just if we're going to brass tacks, bare
Speaker 1: hands and feet, I think Brian, yes, you you take
Speaker 1: out the vision. Now you're dealing with an animal has
Speaker 1: no situational awareness, and now you can kind of get
Speaker 1: a little but even then you're.
Speaker 2: Gonna be teasing it.
Speaker 1: Yeah yeah, way terrified all of a sudden, but you're
Speaker 1: still solved the part that you have negated the absolute
Speaker 1: exponentially higher strength of the gorilla, because the second you
Speaker 1: grab it, the gorilla will just put hands on you,
Speaker 1: rip you a half, even if it can't see. And
Speaker 1: I feel like you're gonna you're just gonna take the
Speaker 1: gorilla off even more with his eyes being all gorilla
Speaker 1: is po Yeah, I.
Speaker 5: So I was.
Speaker 2: I was fully on the You just overwhelm it with
Speaker 2: one hundred at once. And then this Guardian article about
Speaker 2: this debate pointed out that somebody did a three professional
Speaker 2: soccer players, three professional football players verse one hundred children in.
Speaker 1: Japan in Japan.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and the professional soccer players won.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, they beat the ship up them.
Speaker 2: They won.
Speaker 1: I mean they won one nothing, but like I don't
Speaker 1: mean well they if you see the video, they had
Speaker 1: like sixty kids in goal, like literally sixty, Like there
Speaker 1: were like sixty kids goalkeepers in the goal, and they
Speaker 1: just had to kind of headed in over them, but
Speaker 1: like the way they just the three of them just
Speaker 1: spread the field out and were just hitting long balls
Speaker 1: that they can like like just had the kids chasing
Speaker 1: right and it was pretty It was pretty impressive. If
Speaker 1: it's the one I'm thinking of, because I've definitely seen
Speaker 1: that one. I was like, Yeah, their skills are just
Speaker 1: way too high to them get for the kids to
Speaker 1: handle that. I think if it's one hundred random people,
Speaker 1: it depends. I do think you're probably gonna get one
Speaker 1: person who screams go for the eyes in that group,
Speaker 1: you know what I mean? Yeah, and then and then
Speaker 1: you might have a chance. If we're allowed to build
Speaker 1: a team. I do like the humans chance, like if
Speaker 1: we're allowed to draft on even if we're allowed to
Speaker 1: draft ten, there's no answer. There's no answer, Like there's
Speaker 1: no conceivable answer for how you gate. What are you
Speaker 1: gonna do? Like have ten guys try and hold the
Speaker 1: arms right like a gorilla will.
Speaker 2: I'm talking Mike Tomlin and the foremost primatologist and then
Speaker 2: like Lawrence Taylor or whoever the closest person to love
Speaker 2: Taylor Kurrent.
Speaker 1: I'm actually I like the eye thing, but I keep
Speaker 1: coming back to the thing like you can't negate the strength.
Speaker 1: I do think the strength.
Speaker 5: Even in the eye think I do think ten people
Speaker 5: will die for sure, Oh yeah, yeah, oh yeah. Ultimately
Speaker 5: the people will win.
Speaker 2: I do.
Speaker 1: I do think that's right. Like everyone, everyone's pushing vibes
Speaker 1: right now.
Speaker 5: No one's giving me plays, and then you you show them,
Speaker 5: give me.
Speaker 1: An example of the play. What happens? How are you
Speaker 1: gonna like, you can't can't damage your gorilla's achilles? Ten
Speaker 1: do with your teeth, you know what I mean.
Speaker 5: I'm trying to think the first ten are absolutely going
Speaker 5: to get sucked up, that eleventh person goes through the eyes,
Speaker 5: and then the ninety rush the fuck out of the gorilla.
Speaker 2: I think a big difference is going to be if
Speaker 2: it's in a ring where no, you can't pick up
Speaker 2: something that's close by, because like our access to tools
Speaker 2: or like our ability to use whatever is at hand
Speaker 2: as a tool was like the crucial thing that allowed
Speaker 2: us to like get out of the food chain. So
Speaker 2: like if if it's a gorilla enclosure at a zoo
Speaker 2: even or like you know, I feel like that is
Speaker 2: almost an advantage because then I do feel like you can,
Speaker 2: like you have rocks you.
Speaker 1: Know, Okay, how about this not see but that's the thing. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I get that, but I'm I think that the thing
Speaker 1: that is in the appealing about this problem is how
Speaker 1: could the pure just strength of the human body overcome
Speaker 1: a gorilla? Obviously that's.
Speaker 2: If you've been watching these sports these old core videos
Speaker 2: have run uh in a place where he believes I'm
Speaker 2: with him.
Speaker 1: Just over that like like track, you just hear this
Speaker 1: song playing that's like the Hope and all the Hope Core.
Speaker 1: You're like, oh man, and then the hundred guys ran
Speaker 1: after the gorilla.
Speaker 5: It is very graphic and the poking.
Speaker 2: I'm saying one like access to one rock. I don't know.
Speaker 2: So there's this story. I like that guys versus a
Speaker 2: guy named Golia.
Speaker 5: This is what I'm talking about.
Speaker 2: Thank you.
Speaker 1: Going biblically the original sports Hope Core. Wow, way to
Speaker 1: bring it back, way to bring it back?
Speaker 2: All right? Brian, what a pleasure having you on the
Speaker 2: Daily Zeist as always? Where can people find you? Follow
Speaker 2: you all that good stuff?
Speaker 5: You can find me Instagram beat Brian with an I
Speaker 5: Underscore b a h E or TikTok is Brian Bahi.
Speaker 2: Yeah yeah, And is there a work of media or
Speaker 2: so media that you've been enjoying.
Speaker 5: Yeah, I believe. I sent the link and it is
Speaker 5: exactly what I aut. It's it's Steph Curry, you know,
Speaker 5: and he's talking about how he was like a tiny
Speaker 5: dude or whatever. Not tiny, but you know he was
Speaker 5: very underestimated, I guess early on because he's not like
Speaker 5: super tall, he wasn't super big. And then it and
Speaker 5: then there's a hard cut to him just like going
Speaker 5: to town.
Speaker 2: Going to town, making some perfect it's a it is
Speaker 2: a great clip. And there is a great documentary called, uh,
Speaker 2: what's that documentary called that? We we watched it for
Speaker 2: boosties a while back. I think it was just this
Speaker 2: underrated documentary. Yeah, I think it was all underrated. But
Speaker 2: like it's wild because players who you're like, man, they
Speaker 2: they're like a real journeyman, and you know they they
Speaker 2: nobody thought they were going to be good. But then
Speaker 2: you like go back and watch their high school games
Speaker 2: and it's like, oh, they were the biggest, strongest, best athlete,
Speaker 2: best basketball player in their town by like one hundred percent.
Speaker 2: They were like so much better than everybody else. But
Speaker 2: like Steph Curry was actually small for high school basketball,
Speaker 2: he like was a late bloomer, so he was like
Speaker 2: a tiny little guy. Like he looks tiny out there
Speaker 2: in his high school games and it's just like throwing
Speaker 2: up threes with his whole body. And then he like
Speaker 2: has a late ish growth spurt. But we even saw it,
Speaker 2: Like I had kind of forgotten that when he first
Speaker 2: came to our attention in college basketball, he was like
Speaker 2: small for college basketball, Like he was skinny and you know,
Speaker 2: just like a little dude. And I think he added
Speaker 2: like a couple of inches and a bunch of muscle
Speaker 2: like once he got into the NBA. It is a
Speaker 2: wild story that like it's you just have to like keep.
Speaker 1: The thing that even struck me is like his dad
Speaker 1: couldn't even get him like Nepo babied and of Virginia Tech.
Speaker 1: Like they're like that was your dream, Virginia.
Speaker 2: They're like, we love you, Dell, but this guy is
Speaker 2: a lose boy.
Speaker 1: No sorry, off you go.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, they couldn't even get him into Virginia Tech.
Speaker 2: You had to go to Davidson and uh just a yeah.
Speaker 2: It is a it is a hopium story. It's Hope Core,
Speaker 2: Hope Core. I highly highly recommend it amazing miles. Where
Speaker 2: can people find you as their working media?
Speaker 1: You've been enjoy ah Man, Yes, find me everywhere at
Speaker 1: Miles of Gray. Basically that's yeah, anywhere that symbol. If
Speaker 1: you like basketball like Brian does, come check out Miles
Speaker 1: and jack out mad Masks. Some people say it's the
Speaker 1: hope core of basketball podcast.
Speaker 4: Uh.
Speaker 1: And if you are a hardcore ninety day fiance fan,
Speaker 1: then check me out on four to twenty day Fiance.
Speaker 1: Let's see this post like from Blue Skies from at
Speaker 1: Jake grumbachtop, you's got a social posted your child will
Speaker 1: toil in the factory. It will be masculine, it will
Speaker 1: restore our national character, it will make America great again.
Speaker 1: Oh my child, my child will run a lucrative right
Speaker 1: wing podcast. That yeah, yeah, there's that. And then another
Speaker 1: part was just sort of Ben Collins, who you know
Speaker 1: runs the Onion now at Ben Collins's social uh quote
Speaker 1: treeted this sort of like part of JB. Pritzker's speech
Speaker 1: where he was talking about like you know, we need
Speaker 1: we need actual like resistance against this government to get
Speaker 1: something done. And that's where Sean Handy like he's calling
Speaker 1: for a violence this is a call to violence against
Speaker 1: MAGA when he's just like, no, how about people don't
Speaker 1: get pushed around anymore. But this one part that Tim
Speaker 1: or tim Ben Collins displaying his tim onion Yeah Ben
Speaker 1: highlighted was autistic kids and adults who are loving contributors
Speaker 1: to our society don't deserve to be stigmatized by a
Speaker 1: weird NEPO baby who wants dashed at dead bear inside
Speaker 1: his car. Damn fucking now, go off and don't talk
Speaker 1: about your billions, JB. Don't talk about your billions. Keep
Speaker 1: a stay on message, baby, stay on message.
Speaker 2: Let's see you can find me on Twitter at Jack Underscore,
Speaker 2: O'Brian on Blue Sky at Jack ob the number one
Speaker 2: on Mad Boosties and let's see what was up? Been
Speaker 2: doing rob at okay, but still tweeted Kevin Bacon, John Hamm,
Speaker 2: what's next, Tim Pork. It's just a good question that
Speaker 2: needs to be answered. And then a lot of people
Speaker 2: were retweeting the tweet from at Ned's feed where during
Speaker 2: the NFL draft it said the Cardinals pick is in
Speaker 2: and he said we got a new pope, and Matthew
Speaker 2: Waltherer tweeted this is the first NFL Draft ever held
Speaker 2: during a papal interregnum. First chance in history to make
Speaker 2: this joke. Who knows when it could be funny again?
Speaker 1: Was good time?
Speaker 2: Nope, you know the Cardinals pick was in, but unfortunately
Speaker 2: they picked a wide receiver. They did not pick it.
Speaker 1: Oh, the messy one pulled out of the conclave.
Speaker 2: Oh did he?
Speaker 1: Yeah, Giovanni Angelo, bet you who we're talking about. Who's
Speaker 1: there going his way? No, he pulled out of the conclave.
Speaker 1: But yeah, May seventh is the date to start the conclave,
Speaker 1: so you better watch conclave by next seven starts.
Speaker 5: Yeah.
Speaker 2: Yeah, Oh my god, what I thought it was happening
Speaker 2: right now?
Speaker 5: Yeah, I thought it immediate.
Speaker 2: No, bra I was working the publishing industry. It's fucking
Speaker 2: just taking their sweet ass time. You can find us
Speaker 2: on Twitter and Blue Sky at Daily Zeitgeist. Where at
Speaker 2: the Daily Zeitgeist on Instagram, you can go to the
Speaker 2: description of this episode wherever you're listening to it, and
Speaker 2: you can find the footnote Nope, which is where we
Speaker 2: link off to the information that we talked about in
Speaker 2: today's episode. We'll click off to that Steph Curry Hope
Speaker 2: core clip.
Speaker 3: Uh.
Speaker 2: We also link off to a song that we think
Speaker 2: you might enjoy. Hey, Miles, is there a song that
Speaker 2: you think people might enjoy?
Speaker 1: Yeah, this is an La band called Coastal Kites and
Speaker 1: the track is called savilein Stardust sa v A l
Speaker 1: I n Stardust. It sounds I don't know how to
Speaker 1: describe it. It sounds like you found an old tape
Speaker 1: in you're, like a high eight cam quorder tape in
Speaker 1: your garage and you dust it off and.
Speaker 2: You find out your dad was a surfer, her mom
Speaker 2: was a surfer.
Speaker 1: Like it has like this grainy, psyche surf vibe to
Speaker 1: it is what I imagine. So it just feels look
Speaker 1: as La is finally starting to realize that this is
Speaker 1: a desert and the temperature warms up. I like music
Speaker 1: that helps you feel like that. So this is a
Speaker 1: sablein Stardust by Coastal Kites.
Speaker 2: All right, we will link off to that in the footnotes.
Speaker 2: Today is a production of by Heart Radio. For more
Speaker 2: podcasts from my heart Radio, visit the iHeartRadio app Apple
Speaker 2: podcast wherever you listen to your favorite shows. That's gonna
Speaker 2: do it for us this morning. We're back this afternoon
Speaker 2: to tell you what is trending and we will talk
Speaker 2: to you all then, Bye bye. The Daily Zeit Guys
Speaker 2: is executive produced by Catherine Law, co produced by bae Wag,
Speaker 2: co
Speaker 1: Produced by Victor Wright, edited and engineered by Justin Connor,