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Speaker 1: Okay, happy hello everybody. I would like to say Happy St.

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Speaker 1: Patrick's Day. Hi, Happy St. Patty's Day. The most important

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Speaker 1: holiday of the year, and I think that we should

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Speaker 1: all start out by well, I guess saying Happy St.

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Speaker 1: Patrick's Day to each other, right, Yes, I guess it's

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Speaker 1: the least offensive holiday of the year. I mean, I

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Speaker 1: don't know, it's I'm from Chicago, so there's a lot

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Speaker 1: going on on St. Patty's Day. Usually there it's there

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Speaker 1: was dying the river green. There's all kinds of just

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Speaker 1: white girls drunk from the suburbs all over. It's it's

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Speaker 1: a lot. It's a lot dyeing the river green. Is

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Speaker 1: that possible? They really do it. I always thought it

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Speaker 1: was just like a euphemism when I was growing up,

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Speaker 1: But then when I moved to the city, like later

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Speaker 1: on into Chicago, they like fully put die into the

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Speaker 1: river and diet like it's kind of always a little green,

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Speaker 1: but they diet bright green. Supposedly it doesn't kill all

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Speaker 1: the fish. But you know, yeah, that sounds very suspect. Well,

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Speaker 1: hopefully you're all wearing green today because it is St.

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Speaker 1: Patty's Day. But if you need something to wear, you

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Speaker 1: might check out our merch. Yeah, everybody. We have new merch.

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Speaker 1: We have Dear Chelsea merch which you can order on

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Speaker 1: my website Chelsea handler dot com. And we have cute

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Speaker 1: t shirts and cute hats and yeah, go and get some.

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Speaker 1: We have added some second shows in areas. I'm filming

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Speaker 1: my next stand up special at the Rymann in Nashville,

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Speaker 1: so tickets are now on sale for that, and we've

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Speaker 1: added second shows in d C. And at the Wiltern

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Speaker 1: in Los Angeles and oh, San Francisco. Yeah, we're adding

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Speaker 1: a second show in San Francisco at the Masonic and

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Speaker 1: that weekend I perform at the Masonic two shows and

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Speaker 1: then Joe Koi performs the next night and the next

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Speaker 1: night and at some arena in San Francisco. So we're

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Speaker 1: gonna be both performing in the same city the same weekend.

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Speaker 1: So how fun, Oh my goodness, just bull descending on

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Speaker 1: a city and just doing wonderful thing, descending on our

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Speaker 1: hot air balloon. That's how we like to enter cities.

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Speaker 1: That's really fun. That's really fun. So are you making

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Speaker 1: a point to sort of try and tour together so

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Speaker 1: you can actually see each other or how does that

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Speaker 1: work in your life. Yeah, I mean I think thee

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Speaker 1: well his tours, and his tour kind of wraps itself

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Speaker 1: up in April and then because he's shooting his special,

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Speaker 1: so then he's done. And then I think he'll probably

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Speaker 1: just come on the road with me, like as a

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Speaker 1: plus one. And then you know, obviously we're gonna want

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Speaker 1: to He'll, you know, come and make surprise guest appearances.

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Speaker 1: That's my shows and like I like to do when

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Speaker 1: I'm with him. But I think, yeah, we want to

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Speaker 1: work towards a thing where we're going to be performing

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Speaker 1: together so that the next tour we're in it together,

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Speaker 1: you know, So we'll have to figure out our Lucy

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Speaker 1: and DESI act. But I don't think it'll be a problem. No.

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Speaker 1: I mean you seem to get along very well and

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Speaker 1: like people are psyched to see you both together. It's

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Speaker 1: just really fun. Well, I know Joe is not with you,

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Speaker 1: but I hear somebody's going to be with you soon. Oh.

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Speaker 1: I am taking my dogs alone to Whistler. I just

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Speaker 1: I don't want to be away from them any longer.

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Speaker 1: And I wasn't so great at taking them out to

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Speaker 1: go to the bathroom last year, Like I put these

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Speaker 1: p pads on my balcony and I would just leave

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Speaker 1: the door open and by the time I came home,

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Speaker 1: there would just be like pe pads on my balcony

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Speaker 1: filled with urine, and I was like, oh my god,

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Speaker 1: I'm turning into courtly love. But now Joe, coming back

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Speaker 1: and forth, I'm feeling like he's going to contribute a

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Speaker 1: little bit more. He's more of the get up and

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Speaker 1: take the dogs for a walk kind of guy than

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Speaker 1: I am. So I'm just kind of pawning that off

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Speaker 1: on him and using him like a bitch is basically

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Speaker 1: what I'm doing. I'm like, you know what, Joe, you

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Speaker 1: can take care of the dogs because he is their

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Speaker 1: stepfather and they love him. They're starting to love him,

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Speaker 1: and I don't want to be away from them anymore.

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Speaker 1: Are they calling him dad yet? No, they're not going

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Speaker 1: to say that, and they I don't even think they

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Speaker 1: speak English quite frankly, so they're never going to say

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Speaker 1: that Papa Bear. Maybe that's all I can but yeah,

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Speaker 1: so I'm gonna take them with me. That means I'm

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Speaker 1: taking them to like my stand up shows, and then

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Speaker 1: we're flying into Whistler and then they'll be there with

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Speaker 1: me for a couple of months. Are they like pretty

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Speaker 1: good flyers? Yeah, they're pretty good wherever. Like yesterday, Joe

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Speaker 1: and I took Bernice to Starbucks with us, and Joe

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Speaker 1: has one of these ridiculous cars. It's a convertible. I

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Speaker 1: don't know what kind it is because it's just so

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Speaker 1: loud you can hear them coming from like three blocks away.

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Speaker 1: I'm like, how do we get it? You're successful? Like

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Speaker 1: cool it with the fucking cars. Anyway, we brought Bernice

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Speaker 1: to Starbucks and she sat in my lap and had

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Speaker 1: her arms paws around me. Albeit it was a forced

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Speaker 1: situation because there was nowhere else for her to go

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Speaker 1: because it's like a two seater sports car, so she

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Speaker 1: was forced to have to hug me. But I'll take it.

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Speaker 1: And it was adorable, And I was like, you know what,

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Speaker 1: I'm not willing to go another month without them. No,

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Speaker 1: you just like need that cuddly buddy that you can embrace. Yeah. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: and they're gonna be upset when they're not around my belt,

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Speaker 1: my housekeeper, But you know what funk that? Because they've

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Speaker 1: been with her for months. They she took them last

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Speaker 1: night for her own She's like, I need to sleep

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Speaker 1: over if they're going. And then Felix, my dog walker

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Speaker 1: who's there works at the house every day, said the

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Speaker 1: same thing. He had a sleepover with them on Saturday.

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Speaker 1: I was like, oh my god, it's like we're ride

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Speaker 1: sharing these It's like a group on with these dogs.

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Speaker 1: Everyone loves them. Our guest today is the host of

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Speaker 1: Full Frontal with Samantha b which is in its seventh

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Speaker 1: season and it airs on Thursdays at ten on TBS.

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Speaker 1: And she also has a podcast which I was just

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Speaker 1: on called Full Release, and that's wherever you get your podcast.

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Speaker 1: Please welcome Samantha b. Hi. Like, I was so excited,

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Speaker 1: thank you for having me. Oh my god, I'm excited

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Speaker 1: to be here. Okay, this is strange because we were

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Speaker 1: just we just recorded your podcast and we are now

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Speaker 1: recording my podcast. But this is the actual first time

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Speaker 1: that we have ever spoken, which doesn't really make a

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Speaker 1: lot of sense. It doesn't make any sense. And like

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Speaker 1: I feel also like I've said your name in so

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Speaker 1: many contexts because as we talked about in my pipe,

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Speaker 1: like people are always like, well, you're the only woman

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Speaker 1: doing a show, and you're like, no, I'm not. Because

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Speaker 1: there's Chelsea, there's this person. There's like there's like a

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Speaker 1: lot of so I feel like I've said your name,

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Speaker 1: I've tried to manifest you many times, and anyway, now

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Speaker 1: we're here. So I'm very grateful, thank you. I'm I'm

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Speaker 1: excited to talk to you. I want to talk to

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Speaker 1: you first. I want to ask you about your your

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Speaker 1: seventh season of Full Frontal with Samantha b And I

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Speaker 1: want to know how that has been, what this experience

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Speaker 1: has been like, and what the most kind of challenging

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Speaker 1: thing that you faced, because I think we we think, oh,

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Speaker 1: you get a TV show, it's going to be great.

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Speaker 1: You get to express your creative whatever you want to

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Speaker 1: put out there, you get to do, and then it

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Speaker 1: comes with such a whole other plethora of baggage that

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Speaker 1: you're just like, there are so many challenges you come across,

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Speaker 1: and for every person that's different, because some people thrive

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Speaker 1: in different situations. So I'm curious to know what your

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Speaker 1: biggest challenges have been and like, really, what you've learned

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Speaker 1: about yourself through doing all of this. Well, I think

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Speaker 1: that the big inning it was like put my whole

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Speaker 1: self on hold. I feel like I don't even really

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Speaker 1: remember the first year and a half because it's so

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Speaker 1: much busy making and you're just trying to like it

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Speaker 1: feels like every every show that you complete, you're like

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Speaker 1: scrambling to complete the next one. You're like always you're

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Speaker 1: just like churning and churning and the wheels are constantly turning,

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Speaker 1: so you're never at rest, never at rest. And then

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Speaker 1: you have a little bit more time to kind of

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Speaker 1: like take a step back and think, but it's not

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Speaker 1: that much more time, and now kind of seven seasons in,

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Speaker 1: I'm like, Okay, now I can now I can think

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Speaker 1: a little bit. But for me, the most challenging thing

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Speaker 1: is actually managing I think managing people like managing a business,

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Speaker 1: like being honest about the fact that it's like a

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Speaker 1: business with real people who have real lives and worries

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Speaker 1: and concerns and complaints and you kind of have to

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Speaker 1: like be a part of that and fix problems and

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Speaker 1: fix your work culture and like that I found really

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Speaker 1: challenging because I'm not like a business. This person I

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Speaker 1: don't know how to do. I'm not trained. This is

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Speaker 1: like a a gift. This is like a present and

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Speaker 1: an opportunity, and you're trying to be very creative, but

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Speaker 1: you also I think balancing like the creative part and

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Speaker 1: the performing part, which is the part that you get

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Speaker 1: into it for with actually being a caretaker of people

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Speaker 1: and trying to make a work environment that works for

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Speaker 1: other people. That was the part that I found so

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Speaker 1: unexpected and and extremely challenging, and I still find it

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Speaker 1: challenging to this day. Yeah, I agree with that. It's

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Speaker 1: very hard to manage people, especially when that's not what

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Speaker 1: you're setting out to do, you know, totally as a

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Speaker 1: comedic voice or as you know, as a journalistic voice,

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Speaker 1: like however you want to frame it. You're sitting there

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Speaker 1: trying to just share your opinion and you're kind of

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Speaker 1: p o V. And then you realize, oh, there's so

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Speaker 1: much more involved than that, totally. Like people go to school,

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Speaker 1: like people go to college to learn how to manage

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Speaker 1: and learn there's like techniques and there's philosophies, and there's

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Speaker 1: ways to approach things and ways to like phrase things

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Speaker 1: that are better than others. And it's like, I'm sure

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Speaker 1: it was probably hard for you to like you're a

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Speaker 1: performer and you're so independent and you're like you're doing

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Speaker 1: your own thing, and then all of a sudden, there's

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Speaker 1: like people working for you, and it's hard to grapple

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Speaker 1: with that. It's a really sharp learning curve. It was

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Speaker 1: for me for sure. I want to say thank you

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Speaker 1: for saying all of a sudden instead of all of

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Speaker 1: the sudden, because I have been saying all of the

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Speaker 1: sudden for many years and somebody very kindly and appropriately

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Speaker 1: corrected me and said, it's not all of the sudden,

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Speaker 1: you fucking idiot. For somebody who likes to correct other

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Speaker 1: people's grammar, you should figure out that you're saying all

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Speaker 1: of the sudden. And I was so horrified. So now

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Speaker 1: I listen to make sure everyone's saying all of a sudden.

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Speaker 1: Oh my god. You know what, for my most of

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Speaker 1: my entire life, I thought it was doggie dog world.

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Speaker 1: You know what. It's a doggie dog world out there, guys,

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Speaker 1: And if you say it fast enough it makes sense.

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Speaker 1: You're like, yeah, it is a doggie dog world. So

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Speaker 1: how did you manage when in the beginning of your show,

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Speaker 1: like you're you obviously have more responsibilities than I do

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Speaker 1: because you have a family, So how did that work

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Speaker 1: out for you? Because I know you're with the love

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Speaker 1: of your life. You're with your partner. Yep, ye ye. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: we've been married now for we've been together since whatever

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Speaker 1: that means, I can't I don't count. I don't know.

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Speaker 1: I don't know how many years that is, and they

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Speaker 1: don't remember those things, but it was. And we have

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Speaker 1: three kids, so we have like a sixteen We have

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Speaker 1: a sixteen year old, thirteen year old, and an eleven

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Speaker 1: year old. And so I think I did like a

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Speaker 1: medium job at a lot of things, and I definitely

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Speaker 1: lost myself. So I went like, there's three big pieces

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Speaker 1: of this. There's the work, and then there's my children,

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Speaker 1: and then there's me as a human being. And I

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Speaker 1: just focused on the other two things. And I probably

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Speaker 1: didn't pay any attention to myself for many years. I

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Speaker 1: think I actually like was like I just give over.

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Speaker 1: I just kind of gave over for years. And Yeah,

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Speaker 1: the irony that you're doing a show with your name

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Speaker 1: on it, but you're not paying any attention to yourself, No,

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Speaker 1: not at all. No, it was. It's not It's not possible,

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Speaker 1: and I do think a lot of people experience that.

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Speaker 1: It's not unusual, it's not like special. I definitely stopped

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Speaker 1: like having my period like I stopped all these things

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Speaker 1: were just like everything stop everything, like, shove all your

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Speaker 1: personal feelings out the door for a while. We'll get

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Speaker 1: back to you later. And so and and I did.

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Speaker 1: I'm like more and more fully realized human being now

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Speaker 1: than I was at the beginning. Do you go to therapy?

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Speaker 1: I don't look at you. I probably should. Well I

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Speaker 1: tried to, and then I was like, I don't get

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Speaker 1: me wrong, How I'm going to do this? How do

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Speaker 1: I add this to my schedule? It feel very yeah,

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Speaker 1: And in the beginning of therapy, I would say it

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Speaker 1: felt very self absorbed. You know, you're like, oh god,

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Speaker 1: now I have to be one of these people that

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Speaker 1: just sits here. In addition to having my whole life

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Speaker 1: be about me, I have to go now and talk

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Speaker 1: to somebody about myself for two hours. And it feels

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Speaker 1: it is good in the long run, but in the beginning, when,

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Speaker 1: especially when you have your own show and you have

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Speaker 1: all of these things, you just it is kind of

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Speaker 1: a breath of fresh air to not think about yourself.

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Speaker 1: How do you know when you found the right person? Like,

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Speaker 1: how do you actually find I feel like that's the secret,

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Speaker 1: which is that you don't necessarily have to go with

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Speaker 1: the first therapist you meet, like you probably could have

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Speaker 1: bad ones along the way. Right. Oh yeah, that's what

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Speaker 1: everybody talks about, you know, because people find one and

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Speaker 1: it's not a match, and then they're like, you know,

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Speaker 1: forget it, you know, what's the point. But I mean

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Speaker 1: I would argue always that there's always somebody that's going

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Speaker 1: to be a match. It's just a matter of going

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Speaker 1: through the trial and error. But you know, it's not

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Speaker 1: that everybody has to go to therapy. I mean, let's

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Speaker 1: be realistic. Some people are fine without it and some

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Speaker 1: people really need to unpack their ship. So right, right, right,

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Speaker 1: there's a lot of therapy talk on this podcast. We

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Speaker 1: got We started this podcast trying to give advice, you know,

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Speaker 1: like I wanted people to call in, like where should

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Speaker 1: I go on vacation? And then all of a sudden,

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Speaker 1: all of a sudden, it got serious and I was

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Speaker 1: like big responsibilities. But I love it. I love kind

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Speaker 1: of helping people, you know, just be a better version

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Speaker 1: of themselves, because I think that's it. The thing that

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Speaker 1: I got so much from therapy was calming the fucked down,

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Speaker 1: not being so reactive and just calming down and sitting

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Speaker 1: still instead of having a million things going on. I

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Speaker 1: had an inability to do that. So once I was

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Speaker 1: able to kind of start understanding that it's not like

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Speaker 1: you're ever fully cooked, obviously, because what would be the

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Speaker 1: point if we were. But I liked all that stuff

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Speaker 1: when I was seeing like concrete improvements. Then it became addictive.

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Speaker 1: I was like, Okay, wait, I can get better at this.

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Speaker 1: I can do this in a more mindful way. I

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Speaker 1: really would love someone to teach me how to calm

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Speaker 1: the funk down, because I actually don't like I feel

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Speaker 1: now I'm fifty two and I stand doing everything like

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Speaker 1: I never It's really I never sit down like my

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Speaker 1: feet or in pay at the end of the day

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Speaker 1: from just like the amount of like back and forth

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Speaker 1: like zip zip zip zip zip, constantly walking and I

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Speaker 1: have like live in an apartment. Where am I going?

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Speaker 1: Maybe you're on your walking treadmill? Who knows. I just

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Speaker 1: never said, what have you learned about yourself doing this

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Speaker 1: show that you were surprised to learn in a good way?

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Speaker 1: Like what good qualities at managing people? Did you find

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Speaker 1: out about yourself? Well? I did find out it's certainly

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Speaker 1: not possible to make everyone who works for you happy.

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Speaker 1: I learned that I care about people being happy. I truly,

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Speaker 1: like meaningfully would rather know what someone's problem is and

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Speaker 1: try to help fix the problem than to just stick

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Speaker 1: my head in the sand and pretend that there's no

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Speaker 1: problem and then it's going to go away on its own.

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Speaker 1: I did learn that I'm generally unwilling to leave. Takes

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Speaker 1: me a long time to solve problems sometimes, but I'm

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Speaker 1: always game to try. And that's actually like a pretty

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Speaker 1: painful proposition. It's much easier to like not care what's

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Speaker 1: going on in anybody's life, or to to not care

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Speaker 1: and kind of like turn away from that. It just

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Speaker 1: sort of understood that it was better to have a

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Speaker 1: more difficult experience, Like if people were truly unhappy, I

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Speaker 1: did want to know it, and that sometimes came back

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Speaker 1: to me like it was sometimes my doing that people

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Speaker 1: were unhappy. So being willing to be responsible for that

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Speaker 1: was both a good thing to know about myself but

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Speaker 1: also very hard. Kind of like made life pretty hard.

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Speaker 1: It's been a long learning journey. How about your relationship

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Speaker 1: with your husband, how has that been affected by seven

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Speaker 1: years of you doing this show? Well, he's really I mean,

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Speaker 1: he had his show, he had a script a show

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Speaker 1: at the same time that I was launching this show.

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Speaker 1: So we were just like full pistons, like both of

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Speaker 1: us firing in our separate in our distinct categories. Like he's,

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Speaker 1: you know, he's an executive bruiser of my show. I

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Speaker 1: was an executive bruiser of his show. So we were

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Speaker 1: just like firing on all cylinders for four solid years,

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Speaker 1: and somehow we understood each other's issues. We had like

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Speaker 1: a separate we had like a language of our work

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Speaker 1: and then a language of our family. We were both

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Speaker 1: very very good at making a separation though, like we're

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Speaker 1: very good at compartmentalizing our two worlds. So like when

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Speaker 1: work was over, we were on the kids. Were like

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Speaker 1: very into parenting our kids. We love them. We sacrifice

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Speaker 1: a tremendous amount of like we don't really party. We

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Speaker 1: don't we separated all that stuff out, Like we don't

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Speaker 1: we'll never go out. We don't have like networks of

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Speaker 1: like people we met at parties because we never because

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Speaker 1: we're always like, let's do some school essays. So we

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Speaker 1: and we were sort of like both went on that

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Speaker 1: journey and we're really like homebodies. So we were just

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Speaker 1: like work and kids and nothing in between, and we

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Speaker 1: were we did that together. So our relationship is very solid.

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Speaker 1: Sometimes we get frustrated. Sometimes we get frustrated with each other.

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Speaker 1: Like I definitely tune out sometimes I space out if

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Speaker 1: I'm in work mode, I'm so spaced. Everyone can tell

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Speaker 1: that I'm physically present but completely mentally disengaged. And now

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Speaker 1: instead of like arguing about it, they all just kind

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Speaker 1: of go, oh, she's gone. Like I hear them saying

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Speaker 1: that she's gone, and I'm physically there, and I'm like, yep,

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Speaker 1: I'm gone. I can't deal with this right now. Everybody's

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Speaker 1: been very patient. And do you have a lot of

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Speaker 1: close girlfriends? No? I have a like really small group

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Speaker 1: of girlfriends and that is great. And I have my

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Speaker 1: husband and I have my kids. It's like a do

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Speaker 1: you tight have a really small family too. I'm an

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Speaker 1: only child, the only child of an only child, which

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Speaker 1: is interesting that you have three children. I think it's

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Speaker 1: probably because of it's probably because of that. Actually, what

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Speaker 1: size family does your husband come from? He's one of two,

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Speaker 1: so we both come from relatively small families. We don't

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Speaker 1: have like a big network of we're very much. I

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Speaker 1: think we're very much about creating an island that we

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Speaker 1: would want to live on. That's cute. It's pretty great.

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Speaker 1: It's pretty great. We travel well together. We're just like

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Speaker 1: we're just like a little unit and we just bounce

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Speaker 1: around all together. Yeah. On your podcast, we were talking

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Speaker 1: about my relationship and you were saying that you've met

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Speaker 1: your person too, and it's, uh, I think you could

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Speaker 1: always tell when someone's with their person, right, there's a

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Speaker 1: total calm. Equanimity is a good word for it. That's

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Speaker 1: a really good word for it. It is a very

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Speaker 1: it is very grounding to be like, Okay, I'm very

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Speaker 1: grateful for it, so so grateful, But also I don't

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Speaker 1: think about it all that much because I don't have

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Speaker 1: to think about it all that much. It's not really dramatic.

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Speaker 1: It's not a place of conflict. Which is not to

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Speaker 1: say that we don't disagree, for sure, we do, but

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Speaker 1: it's not a place of conflict in my life, Like,

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Speaker 1: it's not something I have to resolve. We argue well

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Speaker 1: together and smooth it out quickly. Disagree about some small things,

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Speaker 1: but generally speaking, it's it's there for both of us

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Speaker 1: because when we got together, we were doing children's theater

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Speaker 1: as Data and Sailor Moon. Everybody download that damn trip. Well,

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Speaker 1: I was the star of the show. Did play Sailor Moon,

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Speaker 1: just in case anyone was wondering. But like you know,

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Speaker 1: we went through like such phases of life were like

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Speaker 1: he was working and I was not working, and then

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Speaker 1: I was working and he was not working. So we

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Speaker 1: were always like when we had nothing, filling in the

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Speaker 1: blanks for each other. And that has like continued smoothly

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Speaker 1: into like higher stakes and bigger jobs, and we're still

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Speaker 1: filling in the blanks. When I'm really busy. He'll take

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Speaker 1: over this. He's away, I take over this, And it's

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Speaker 1: not easy, but that's how we do it. You mentioned

390
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Speaker 1: it's not dramatic, but you don't see you strike me

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Speaker 1: as somebody who has a very dramatic personality, do you?

392
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Speaker 1: I have in the past, very super dramatic. So this

393
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Speaker 1: was like I would say that Jason, my husband, is

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Speaker 1: the first person who he settled me down as a person.

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Speaker 1: He's actually the person who brought me to Earth, which

396
00:20:35,000 --> 00:20:38,520
Speaker 1: I needed and and didn't like before I met Jason,

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Speaker 1: when we were on our first date actually, which I

398
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Speaker 1: didn't even know for him, it was a date. For me.

399
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Speaker 1: I was like, I'm just going out to dinner with

400
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Speaker 1: this my friend Jason and were you guys friends for

401
00:20:50,200 --> 00:20:51,639
Speaker 1: a long time before you went on a day? But

402
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Speaker 1: we were co workers, so we worked on this children's

403
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Speaker 1: theater show and we were like, let's go out for dinner.

404
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Speaker 1: And he was like, we're going on a date and

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Speaker 1: I was like, we are at dinner, and the whole

406
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Speaker 1: dinner I just talked to him about how I was

407
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Speaker 1: ruined and I would never be in a relationship. I

408
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Speaker 1: was like, well that's it for me, folks. I never

409
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Speaker 1: I don't need it. I don't need it, I don't

410
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Speaker 1: want it. No more relationships, thank you very much. I'm

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Speaker 1: closing up shop and let's go to a movie. Should

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Speaker 1: we go? See you Waiting for Guffman? And he was

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Speaker 1: like I might kiss you and I was like, no,

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Speaker 1: thank you, and then I drove away, and then we

415
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Speaker 1: went on another day and then we did no thanks

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Speaker 1: and now here you are. Well, I think it's twenty

417
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Speaker 1: five years later, right plus something. We're literally this I

418
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Speaker 1: think this month approximately twenty five years together. Oh well,

419
00:21:44,520 --> 00:21:47,399
Speaker 1: that's a pretty big anniversary. That's called the silver anniversary.

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Speaker 1: I believe you might want to get your ducks in

421
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Speaker 1: a row. I'm sure I'm wrong about that. Every anniversary

422
00:21:53,040 --> 00:21:57,160
Speaker 1: is like it's paper and this is the yarn anniversary.

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Speaker 1: Like it doesn't start to get really good until you're

424
00:21:59,680 --> 00:22:03,439
Speaker 1: like fifty years in and then they're like Pewter or

425
00:22:03,520 --> 00:22:06,600
Speaker 1: something like that. And do you feel like, do you

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00:22:06,640 --> 00:22:08,600
Speaker 1: feel like the last seven years of your life with

427
00:22:08,600 --> 00:22:10,200
Speaker 1: the show? Like do you feel like life has gone

428
00:22:10,240 --> 00:22:15,719
Speaker 1: by so quickly, so quickly? Like so quickly. I do

429
00:22:15,840 --> 00:22:19,359
Speaker 1: feel like a really only market in like Jason and

430
00:22:19,400 --> 00:22:20,919
Speaker 1: I were just getting old together. But I see it

431
00:22:20,960 --> 00:22:23,320
Speaker 1: in the kids because like when we started this enterprise,

432
00:22:24,760 --> 00:22:27,639
Speaker 1: they were little. I mean they were like kids. We

433
00:22:27,680 --> 00:22:30,240
Speaker 1: had a whole other life. We had a whole other life,

434
00:22:30,280 --> 00:22:33,960
Speaker 1: like a different physical circumstances. And I don't know exactly

435
00:22:33,960 --> 00:22:35,639
Speaker 1: know what happened, but I definitely looked up and I

436
00:22:35,680 --> 00:22:41,080
Speaker 1: was like, you guys are all teenagers. Wait a minute.

437
00:22:42,400 --> 00:22:44,359
Speaker 1: That's primarily how I think of children, just as a

438
00:22:44,400 --> 00:22:47,359
Speaker 1: reflection of age is a reflection of myself. Yeah, which

439
00:22:47,359 --> 00:22:49,680
Speaker 1: is which is why I never had them, because I'm like, listen,

440
00:22:49,680 --> 00:22:51,639
Speaker 1: I don't need to be reminded of that life is

441
00:22:51,680 --> 00:22:55,080
Speaker 1: moving quickly. How did you deal with the Trump years

442
00:22:55,640 --> 00:22:58,480
Speaker 1: since you were, you know, constantly talking about that that,

443
00:22:58,560 --> 00:23:01,240
Speaker 1: How did that affect your site key and kind of

444
00:23:01,280 --> 00:23:04,720
Speaker 1: emotional well being. I think when people spoke about Trump

445
00:23:04,760 --> 00:23:08,560
Speaker 1: dearrangement syndrome, that was That's what I felt. I had

446
00:23:08,600 --> 00:23:12,080
Speaker 1: that like full ring where I couldn't Sometimes I just

447
00:23:12,119 --> 00:23:14,359
Speaker 1: couldn't communicate how angry I was, Like I would just

448
00:23:14,440 --> 00:23:19,439
Speaker 1: get up. It was so disgusted and horrified on a

449
00:23:19,680 --> 00:23:24,280
Speaker 1: really daily basis, and I it was coincided with paramounopause,

450
00:23:24,400 --> 00:23:27,520
Speaker 1: which is a trip on its own, to the point

451
00:23:27,560 --> 00:23:31,000
Speaker 1: where I didn't really sleep. I wasn't It was always

452
00:23:31,080 --> 00:23:33,920
Speaker 1: kind of eating properly. I'm never a person who would

453
00:23:33,960 --> 00:23:37,159
Speaker 1: like skip a meal from stress. I love meals. But

454
00:23:37,240 --> 00:23:40,879
Speaker 1: I would wake up like clockwork at two thirty in

455
00:23:40,880 --> 00:23:43,320
Speaker 1: the morning and be like, all right, what's going on

456
00:23:43,359 --> 00:23:45,240
Speaker 1: in the world? And then I would like get really

457
00:23:45,400 --> 00:23:50,399
Speaker 1: enraged by reading the news. Just a constant immersion in

458
00:23:50,600 --> 00:23:54,280
Speaker 1: the news cycle. It was hard to get my sleeping

459
00:23:54,280 --> 00:23:57,040
Speaker 1: back on track, and it was tough. I don't know

460
00:23:57,160 --> 00:23:59,840
Speaker 1: it was hard. It was. It was not as hard

461
00:23:59,880 --> 00:24:01,560
Speaker 1: for me. I mean I was still doing a comedy show,

462
00:24:01,600 --> 00:24:04,359
Speaker 1: like that's still a fun job. I still enjoyed my

463
00:24:04,440 --> 00:24:06,320
Speaker 1: work and I had fun at work and it was great.

464
00:24:06,359 --> 00:24:08,840
Speaker 1: But it was like sifting through all that anger to

465
00:24:08,920 --> 00:24:12,000
Speaker 1: get to the kernels of comedy was quite an undertaking,

466
00:24:12,040 --> 00:24:14,919
Speaker 1: and it was real undertaking for my whole team at

467
00:24:14,920 --> 00:24:17,800
Speaker 1: the show, Like we were all every day we're like, oh, fun,

468
00:24:17,960 --> 00:24:19,919
Speaker 1: ten new things that we have to that are going

469
00:24:20,000 --> 00:24:24,760
Speaker 1: to ruin the world and tangibly destroy people's lives and

470
00:24:24,800 --> 00:24:28,160
Speaker 1: set conditions for terrible things to happen in the future

471
00:24:28,680 --> 00:24:31,720
Speaker 1: too vulnerable people. And you could just see it happening,

472
00:24:31,760 --> 00:24:35,000
Speaker 1: and you're like, what the why is that anybody dare

473
00:24:35,040 --> 00:24:37,520
Speaker 1: anything about this. I did learn that there are no

474
00:24:37,680 --> 00:24:41,520
Speaker 1: heroes and no white knights coming to save you. You

475
00:24:41,560 --> 00:24:44,840
Speaker 1: have to save yourself, and that's really hard to do.

476
00:24:44,840 --> 00:24:46,480
Speaker 1: You have to save yourself and you also have to

477
00:24:46,520 --> 00:24:48,200
Speaker 1: find We were talking about this last night at dinner

478
00:24:48,200 --> 00:24:50,359
Speaker 1: and with some friends, and I were discussing, you know,

479
00:24:50,680 --> 00:24:53,720
Speaker 1: actively being hopeful and positive and knowing that you're putting

480
00:24:53,760 --> 00:24:56,320
Speaker 1: something out that is going to counter all of the

481
00:24:56,359 --> 00:24:58,960
Speaker 1: negativity and all of the destruction that we see every

482
00:24:59,040 --> 00:25:01,800
Speaker 1: day and not so wrapped up in that because I

483
00:25:01,800 --> 00:25:04,720
Speaker 1: also had that experience when Trump selected, I got so

484
00:25:04,800 --> 00:25:07,600
Speaker 1: immersed and so wrapped up. The only thing that would

485
00:25:07,640 --> 00:25:09,720
Speaker 1: calm me down was talking to other people who also

486
00:25:10,080 --> 00:25:12,480
Speaker 1: were as as pissed as I was. You know, it's

487
00:25:12,480 --> 00:25:15,280
Speaker 1: like the lowest common denominator of human interaction is like,

488
00:25:15,600 --> 00:25:17,040
Speaker 1: what do you think is gonna happen? Where is this

489
00:25:17,080 --> 00:25:19,240
Speaker 1: gonna go? What about what he said here? You know?

490
00:25:19,359 --> 00:25:22,280
Speaker 1: And then I think coming out of it and understanding, like,

491
00:25:22,440 --> 00:25:27,560
Speaker 1: getting stuck in that cog is so unhelpful for for

492
00:25:27,840 --> 00:25:30,920
Speaker 1: spreading joy or light or hope or whatever your game

493
00:25:31,080 --> 00:25:33,040
Speaker 1: is or your currency is that you want to spread

494
00:25:33,080 --> 00:25:36,640
Speaker 1: out there. It's nice to remind yourself even when all

495
00:25:36,800 --> 00:25:39,639
Speaker 1: terrible things are happening, like good things can happen at

496
00:25:39,680 --> 00:25:42,560
Speaker 1: the same time, and there are ways to inform, educate

497
00:25:42,680 --> 00:25:45,480
Speaker 1: and motivate people to get involved in the right way.

498
00:25:45,520 --> 00:25:48,760
Speaker 1: Instead of allowing all of that to you know, weigh

499
00:25:48,880 --> 00:25:50,720
Speaker 1: so heavily on you, which I was so guilty of

500
00:25:50,760 --> 00:25:53,679
Speaker 1: doing during that time, I just let it just engulf me,

501
00:25:53,840 --> 00:25:56,879
Speaker 1: you know, instead of moving towards a place of okay,

502
00:25:56,920 --> 00:26:00,000
Speaker 1: how do we work towards something better? It's a real practice,

503
00:26:00,160 --> 00:26:02,520
Speaker 1: and it really does help to be off of social media.

504
00:26:02,640 --> 00:26:05,320
Speaker 1: That's actually a very like to take breaks from that

505
00:26:05,400 --> 00:26:08,680
Speaker 1: and to give yourself time away from that is because

506
00:26:08,680 --> 00:26:10,800
Speaker 1: it is a constants like an I mean, it is

507
00:26:10,840 --> 00:26:14,680
Speaker 1: just an onslaught and it's so easy, it's so so

508
00:26:14,760 --> 00:26:18,000
Speaker 1: easy to get caught up in things that aren't really

509
00:26:18,200 --> 00:26:20,840
Speaker 1: all that important, or to believe that it's real life

510
00:26:20,960 --> 00:26:25,040
Speaker 1: when it's it's not. Controversies that bubble up on social

511
00:26:25,040 --> 00:26:27,880
Speaker 1: media aren't necessarily things that people are talking thinking about

512
00:26:27,920 --> 00:26:30,000
Speaker 1: in real life, and there is a real life to

513
00:26:30,040 --> 00:26:33,399
Speaker 1: be lived away from that. Yeah, and that's what we

514
00:26:33,520 --> 00:26:35,840
Speaker 1: do on this show. This is about real life. Social

515
00:26:35,840 --> 00:26:37,800
Speaker 1: Media comes up all the time, as you would expect,

516
00:26:38,119 --> 00:26:40,120
Speaker 1: but I find that to be so true for me too.

517
00:26:40,160 --> 00:26:43,280
Speaker 1: I try so hard to have a life outside of

518
00:26:43,359 --> 00:26:47,760
Speaker 1: my professional life, outside of competitiveness, outside of looking around

519
00:26:47,800 --> 00:26:50,040
Speaker 1: to see what other people are doing and not focusing

520
00:26:50,040 --> 00:26:52,880
Speaker 1: on what you're doing, you know, and actually having real

521
00:26:53,000 --> 00:26:56,879
Speaker 1: experiences with real people that are independent of a profession

522
00:26:57,200 --> 00:27:00,480
Speaker 1: or of social media, or of an impression or any

523
00:27:00,520 --> 00:27:04,240
Speaker 1: of that. So what we're gonna do with Catherine, our

524
00:27:04,320 --> 00:27:07,400
Speaker 1: co host, I know you're excited about this Samantha, I can.

525
00:27:07,960 --> 00:27:10,440
Speaker 1: I can see the fervor in your eyes. We are

526
00:27:10,520 --> 00:27:12,080
Speaker 1: people are going to call in, some of them or

527
00:27:12,080 --> 00:27:13,760
Speaker 1: will be on zoom so you can see them, and

528
00:27:13,840 --> 00:27:15,560
Speaker 1: some of them will write, Katherine, what do we have

529
00:27:15,880 --> 00:27:19,320
Speaker 1: in store for us today in terms of advice giving? Oh?

530
00:27:19,400 --> 00:27:23,119
Speaker 1: My goodness, so many things. We have, uh, some baby talk,

531
00:27:23,359 --> 00:27:26,960
Speaker 1: we have bad behavior at one of your shows, Chelsea.

532
00:27:28,440 --> 00:27:31,080
Speaker 1: Fear of your partner falling out of love with you?

533
00:27:32,880 --> 00:27:35,920
Speaker 1: Some some wild stuff. Did you fear that, Samantha ever,

534
00:27:36,040 --> 00:27:37,840
Speaker 1: that your husband would fall out of love with you?

535
00:27:39,040 --> 00:27:41,560
Speaker 1: I think that's normal. I think that's normal too. I'm

536
00:27:41,600 --> 00:27:43,879
Speaker 1: at a brand new relationship and I'm like, at some

537
00:27:44,040 --> 00:27:46,479
Speaker 1: point he is going to find out how disgusting I

538
00:27:46,520 --> 00:27:49,879
Speaker 1: am and be disgusted by me, you know, and I

539
00:27:50,359 --> 00:27:54,680
Speaker 1: and we're still in the honeymoon phase. Ish ish we're

540
00:27:54,880 --> 00:27:59,760
Speaker 1: phasing into we're phasing into the other phase. But yeah,

541
00:27:59,800 --> 00:28:03,400
Speaker 1: I have that fear. That's a very very normal, everyday

542
00:28:03,480 --> 00:28:05,879
Speaker 1: human fear, of course. But you know you have to

543
00:28:05,880 --> 00:28:07,720
Speaker 1: know that they're having that fear about you as well.

544
00:28:08,520 --> 00:28:10,159
Speaker 1: So I would imagine you feel that way about your

545
00:28:10,200 --> 00:28:12,119
Speaker 1: children too, Like, what if my children grow up to

546
00:28:12,160 --> 00:28:15,000
Speaker 1: hate me right, that would be in fear for any parent.

547
00:28:15,520 --> 00:28:20,600
Speaker 1: Natural fear, natural fear. Great, something else to be afraid of? Yeah, great, good,

548
00:28:20,680 --> 00:28:23,399
Speaker 1: let's add more fear. Yeah. Well, we'll take a quick

549
00:28:23,560 --> 00:28:30,600
Speaker 1: break for an ad and we'll be right back and

550
00:28:30,640 --> 00:28:35,920
Speaker 1: we're back with Samantha V and Catherine. Al Right, well,

551
00:28:36,280 --> 00:28:39,360
Speaker 1: let's jump right into our first question. Our first question

552
00:28:39,440 --> 00:28:43,320
Speaker 1: comes from shar She says, Dear Chelsea, my future sister

553
00:28:43,400 --> 00:28:45,800
Speaker 1: in law has been in a relationship for about a

554
00:28:45,880 --> 00:28:48,600
Speaker 1: year now. I recently spent some time with her and

555
00:28:48,640 --> 00:28:52,880
Speaker 1: her boyfriend and noticed read couldn't stop cringing that they

556
00:28:53,000 --> 00:28:56,200
Speaker 1: use their baby talk voice in public and it was

557
00:28:56,280 --> 00:28:58,840
Speaker 1: driving me crazy. How do I tell them that the

558
00:28:58,880 --> 00:29:01,360
Speaker 1: baby talk is something for the privacy of their own

559
00:29:01,360 --> 00:29:07,680
Speaker 1: home and not for public consumption. Thank you, shar God,

560
00:29:08,080 --> 00:29:11,440
Speaker 1: I want to Yeah, do you know, do you really

561
00:29:11,480 --> 00:29:16,560
Speaker 1: want to hear the talk? Do? What? What's my? What

562
00:29:16,920 --> 00:29:19,680
Speaker 1: you doing? Or else they're going to all that me

563
00:29:19,840 --> 00:29:22,800
Speaker 1: on Enchilada. I don't know what does that sound like?

564
00:29:22,880 --> 00:29:28,840
Speaker 1: What when two adults do that? It's exciting they're both

565
00:29:28,880 --> 00:29:31,800
Speaker 1: doing it if I love it. We actually do have

566
00:29:31,880 --> 00:29:35,080
Speaker 1: a clip from her, and so here is a little

567
00:29:35,080 --> 00:29:39,160
Speaker 1: bit of what that baby talk sounds like I really

568
00:29:39,280 --> 00:29:45,360
Speaker 1: want some Mexican food. Oh you do? Oh you when

569
00:29:45,360 --> 00:29:50,080
Speaker 1: you get a margarita the Mexican plish? Yeah? Should I

570
00:29:50,120 --> 00:29:56,120
Speaker 1: have one margharita or two margarita's? M last time you

571
00:29:56,200 --> 00:30:02,880
Speaker 1: had to I had to drive you home. You're probably

572
00:30:03,120 --> 00:30:12,760
Speaker 1: right I should have one, I would say. Honestly, I

573
00:30:12,760 --> 00:30:15,480
Speaker 1: would say shoot her an email and be direct as

574
00:30:15,480 --> 00:30:20,200
Speaker 1: possible and say, listen, baby talk is not for public consumption.

575
00:30:20,640 --> 00:30:23,800
Speaker 1: No one is interested in listening to that. I love

576
00:30:23,880 --> 00:30:28,760
Speaker 1: you and that's all you have to write. Wait, but

577
00:30:28,800 --> 00:30:32,880
Speaker 1: she's your sister. Wait, so show the math on this one.

578
00:30:33,040 --> 00:30:35,520
Speaker 1: It's her future sister in law. So I think that

579
00:30:35,560 --> 00:30:42,160
Speaker 1: means her boyfriend's or fiance's sister sister. That's what right, Yes,

580
00:30:42,360 --> 00:30:46,760
Speaker 1: that's the relationship. So it's like not her sibling, but

581
00:30:46,840 --> 00:30:50,840
Speaker 1: someone is going to spend a lot of time with m. Yep,

582
00:30:51,640 --> 00:30:55,880
Speaker 1: that's a bit of an that's a bit awkward. Do

583
00:30:55,920 --> 00:30:58,040
Speaker 1: you think you can be that direct with your future

584
00:30:58,080 --> 00:31:01,000
Speaker 1: sister in law? I think that when arms of baby talk,

585
00:31:01,080 --> 00:31:03,880
Speaker 1: when it's such a ridiculous behavior, you have to just

586
00:31:04,000 --> 00:31:06,280
Speaker 1: hit the nail off the head and be direct about

587
00:31:06,560 --> 00:31:09,880
Speaker 1: how absurd. It is to think that that's acceptable. No

588
00:31:10,000 --> 00:31:13,800
Speaker 1: one is interested in hearing that. No one's interested in

589
00:31:13,800 --> 00:31:18,000
Speaker 1: seeing people tongue kiss openly. Like if there are pornographs,

590
00:31:18,200 --> 00:31:23,160
Speaker 1: pornographic pornographic videos, there are pornographs, there are pornographic videos.

591
00:31:23,200 --> 00:31:25,959
Speaker 1: You can watch that for that kind of stimulation. Like,

592
00:31:26,040 --> 00:31:28,600
Speaker 1: it's just I think the short sweet to the point,

593
00:31:28,720 --> 00:31:32,000
Speaker 1: and I love you the idea I'm a porn where

594
00:31:32,080 --> 00:31:34,600
Speaker 1: their baby talking ad and I love you so much.

595
00:31:34,680 --> 00:31:36,880
Speaker 1: I love you so much. Yeah, I love you so much.

596
00:31:37,040 --> 00:31:38,840
Speaker 1: Will I love you so much? And I'm worried that

597
00:31:38,880 --> 00:31:40,680
Speaker 1: you're being taken the wrong way when you guys talk

598
00:31:40,800 --> 00:31:46,680
Speaker 1: baby talk. Oh yeah, that's nicer, you know. Maybe, I

599
00:31:46,720 --> 00:31:48,800
Speaker 1: don't know. That's a tough one. I don't know. Right now.

600
00:31:48,840 --> 00:31:50,880
Speaker 1: All I'm thinking about is how many times I've done

601
00:31:50,920 --> 00:31:53,080
Speaker 1: that in public with Joe, And I'm just like fun,

602
00:31:53,240 --> 00:31:54,920
Speaker 1: I hope that I don't do that, but I don't

603
00:31:54,920 --> 00:31:57,160
Speaker 1: think I do it. Sometimes I call him Buddha, Buddha

604
00:31:57,160 --> 00:31:59,120
Speaker 1: Buddha in front of people, but they all are in

605
00:31:59,200 --> 00:32:00,880
Speaker 1: on that and they call him to too. But that's

606
00:32:00,920 --> 00:32:02,920
Speaker 1: as far as it goes in public. We used to

607
00:32:02,960 --> 00:32:06,040
Speaker 1: have friends who called each other, babe, and I really

608
00:32:06,040 --> 00:32:10,400
Speaker 1: hated it. I was like, oh my god, and now

609
00:32:10,920 --> 00:32:13,160
Speaker 1: my house one all night we started doing it ironically.

610
00:32:13,240 --> 00:32:15,360
Speaker 1: This is the danger of doing something ironically in your

611
00:32:15,360 --> 00:32:18,560
Speaker 1: own life, because now we're like bed dead dead and

612
00:32:18,600 --> 00:32:22,880
Speaker 1: we just we've done it now for ten to fifteen years. Ironically.

613
00:32:23,040 --> 00:32:24,680
Speaker 1: I used to make a joke about the word pussy

614
00:32:24,680 --> 00:32:26,720
Speaker 1: because it was such a vile word that I would

615
00:32:26,760 --> 00:32:28,760
Speaker 1: be like, oh, how's your pussy doing today, you know,

616
00:32:28,880 --> 00:32:30,840
Speaker 1: to try and normalize it, and then as a joke,

617
00:32:30,920 --> 00:32:32,520
Speaker 1: my sisters and I like I would go in and

618
00:32:32,520 --> 00:32:35,000
Speaker 1: like say hi to my sister. I'm like, hi, pussy face, pussy,

619
00:32:35,320 --> 00:32:38,800
Speaker 1: And then it became a regular like nickname, and it's like,

620
00:32:38,960 --> 00:32:41,800
Speaker 1: my sisters like, that's not funny. You cannot be using

621
00:32:41,840 --> 00:32:44,600
Speaker 1: it normally because it turned from a joke into now

622
00:32:44,640 --> 00:32:46,680
Speaker 1: you're doing it normally. I'm like, oh, yeah, that's right.

623
00:32:46,720 --> 00:32:49,560
Speaker 1: You can't do that either. But Baby, I mean, I

624
00:32:49,560 --> 00:32:52,320
Speaker 1: don't know. I don't find babe annoying. Baby talk is

625
00:32:52,520 --> 00:32:57,480
Speaker 1: for the bedroom on its pillow talk. Yeah, okay, okay,

626
00:32:57,800 --> 00:33:00,440
Speaker 1: So I don't know. I mean, I I think, yeah,

627
00:33:00,520 --> 00:33:03,400
Speaker 1: I think, be firm and hopefully make the first time,

628
00:33:03,440 --> 00:33:09,880
Speaker 1: the last time I accept your advice. I'm making a

629
00:33:09,920 --> 00:33:13,760
Speaker 1: mental note to myself, Jason, we should stop doing baby talk,

630
00:33:14,000 --> 00:33:17,520
Speaker 1: like I'm gonna learn a lot, well, especially your baby talk,

631
00:33:17,600 --> 00:33:20,040
Speaker 1: because your baby talk was come here, whoopsie, I got

632
00:33:20,040 --> 00:33:23,400
Speaker 1: a pickle or whatever. I hope no one ever catches

633
00:33:23,440 --> 00:33:27,520
Speaker 1: me talking to my cat. I don't because then, yeah, yeah,

634
00:33:27,720 --> 00:33:29,960
Speaker 1: that's exactly what it was, the way I talked to

635
00:33:30,080 --> 00:33:33,240
Speaker 1: my dogs. You have to have a special voice for

636
00:33:33,280 --> 00:33:38,040
Speaker 1: your dogs, like you just do. Yeah. Yeah, that's that's expected,

637
00:33:38,200 --> 00:33:40,720
Speaker 1: that's needed. Yeah, you have to have a special voice

638
00:33:40,720 --> 00:33:42,479
Speaker 1: for your dogs because they don't have a voice, so

639
00:33:42,520 --> 00:33:45,080
Speaker 1: you have to supply them with one, and has to

640
00:33:45,080 --> 00:33:48,920
Speaker 1: be very high frequency, very weird. Yes. My mother in

641
00:33:49,000 --> 00:33:50,960
Speaker 1: law when we were home visiting for the holidays, she

642
00:33:51,000 --> 00:33:53,240
Speaker 1: actually pointed out, She's like, oh, you guys baby talk

643
00:33:53,280 --> 00:33:55,680
Speaker 1: your dog a lot, like kind of constantly. And I

644
00:33:55,720 --> 00:33:58,160
Speaker 1: was like, it's not baby talk though, it's like a

645
00:33:58,240 --> 00:34:00,560
Speaker 1: mimsy speak. And her name is mit See, it's like

646
00:34:00,680 --> 00:34:04,160
Speaker 1: it's her own language. It's for her. Yeah, it's not

647
00:34:04,160 --> 00:34:06,480
Speaker 1: like I'm gonna talk to Bert like he's an adult, like, hey, Bert,

648
00:34:06,560 --> 00:34:09,879
Speaker 1: come here. It's like that doesn't work. Well? Does nothing

649
00:34:09,920 --> 00:34:14,680
Speaker 1: works because you can't hear anything I said? But whatever? Well.

650
00:34:14,719 --> 00:34:19,440
Speaker 1: Our next email comes from Carrie. She's in her twenties.

651
00:34:20,000 --> 00:34:23,400
Speaker 1: She says, I recently attended your show in Minneapolis, Chelsea.

652
00:34:23,920 --> 00:34:26,560
Speaker 1: It was amazing and I thoroughly enjoyed it. I had

653
00:34:26,560 --> 00:34:29,040
Speaker 1: purchased two tickets for the third row a few months

654
00:34:29,080 --> 00:34:32,400
Speaker 1: ago while I was heavily intoxicated, not just because I'm

655
00:34:32,440 --> 00:34:35,120
Speaker 1: a huge fan of yours, but also to spite one

656
00:34:35,160 --> 00:34:37,319
Speaker 1: of my close friends who got tickets for your show

657
00:34:37,360 --> 00:34:40,080
Speaker 1: with some other girls and didn't invite me, even though

658
00:34:40,120 --> 00:34:42,360
Speaker 1: I can guarantee that I'm a larger fan of you

659
00:34:42,600 --> 00:34:45,680
Speaker 1: than they are. They were up in the nosebleeds, so

660
00:34:45,760 --> 00:34:48,719
Speaker 1: I found great joy from having awesome seats, knowing they

661
00:34:48,760 --> 00:34:51,920
Speaker 1: were probably jealous a f Given that I splurged on

662
00:34:52,000 --> 00:34:54,560
Speaker 1: third row seat tickets, it took me a little bit

663
00:34:54,600 --> 00:34:57,840
Speaker 1: to conduct an investigation on who I knew that loved

664
00:34:57,840 --> 00:35:00,160
Speaker 1: you and would be willing to spend that much. I

665
00:35:00,200 --> 00:35:02,759
Speaker 1: found a coworker who was like, hell, yes, I love

666
00:35:02,840 --> 00:35:05,799
Speaker 1: Chelsea Handler. About a year ago, I hung out with

667
00:35:05,800 --> 00:35:09,000
Speaker 1: her outside of work and got drinks. Long story short,

668
00:35:09,440 --> 00:35:11,600
Speaker 1: that night got real weird. And I made a vow

669
00:35:11,640 --> 00:35:13,560
Speaker 1: that I would never hang out with her outside of

670
00:35:13,560 --> 00:35:17,279
Speaker 1: work ever again. Despite my promise to myself, I took

671
00:35:17,320 --> 00:35:19,560
Speaker 1: her up on her offer to come with. When she

672
00:35:19,680 --> 00:35:22,120
Speaker 1: arrived at my house at six pm, she was already

673
00:35:22,200 --> 00:35:25,399
Speaker 1: black out drunk. We missed dinner, and long story short,

674
00:35:25,520 --> 00:35:28,400
Speaker 1: she took more shots during your opener, which perpetuated her

675
00:35:28,440 --> 00:35:32,360
Speaker 1: intoxication level. I don't think you said one single sentence

676
00:35:32,440 --> 00:35:34,839
Speaker 1: during the show without her screaming at you, and I

677
00:35:34,880 --> 00:35:38,920
Speaker 1: was completely horrified and embarrassed. People around us were also

678
00:35:38,960 --> 00:35:41,360
Speaker 1: clearly annoyed, and despite my attempts at telling her to

679
00:35:41,400 --> 00:35:44,279
Speaker 1: shut the funk up, she kept doing it. I just

680
00:35:44,320 --> 00:35:48,120
Speaker 1: wanted to sincerely apologize for her stupidity and obnoxious actions

681
00:35:48,239 --> 00:35:51,120
Speaker 1: during Your show. I also feel bad that she negatively

682
00:35:51,160 --> 00:35:54,040
Speaker 1: affected the people around us from enjoying the show at

683
00:35:54,040 --> 00:35:57,040
Speaker 1: its fullest. She spent the entire day after puking in

684
00:35:57,120 --> 00:35:59,359
Speaker 1: my basement, and I will most likely be getting some

685
00:35:59,400 --> 00:36:02,120
Speaker 1: sort of con track notarized that says I'm never to

686
00:36:02,160 --> 00:36:04,680
Speaker 1: see her face outside of work again. How can I

687
00:36:04,719 --> 00:36:07,520
Speaker 1: get over my anger and embarrassment at what she did,

688
00:36:07,760 --> 00:36:11,319
Speaker 1: especially when I have to see her at work Carrie, Oh,

689
00:36:12,200 --> 00:36:16,040
Speaker 1: that's yeah. Well, first of all, I would think, listen,

690
00:36:16,160 --> 00:36:19,799
Speaker 1: don't worry about that. I don't even remember that. There

691
00:36:19,840 --> 00:36:24,719
Speaker 1: are sometimes hecklers, but that's not ruining, it's disturbance. It's

692
00:36:24,719 --> 00:36:28,880
Speaker 1: not welcome, but it happens, and people get wasted. The

693
00:36:28,920 --> 00:36:31,919
Speaker 1: bigger issue is your friends drinking, which sounds like she's

694
00:36:31,920 --> 00:36:33,840
Speaker 1: a hot mess, and so you should have a little

695
00:36:33,840 --> 00:36:38,880
Speaker 1: bit more empathy for why she's in that situation instead

696
00:36:38,920 --> 00:36:42,640
Speaker 1: of so much judgment towards her, because that's not helpful either.

697
00:36:43,160 --> 00:36:46,640
Speaker 1: And you're holding onto anger, which I don't know your face,

698
00:36:46,760 --> 00:36:49,480
Speaker 1: I don't know her face. It's okay, you didn't affect

699
00:36:49,520 --> 00:36:51,960
Speaker 1: my life in a negative way. You know, probably some

700
00:36:52,000 --> 00:36:55,280
Speaker 1: people around you, but they're not still thinking about that either.

701
00:36:55,800 --> 00:36:57,759
Speaker 1: Your friend sounds like she's just a hot mess, and

702
00:36:57,800 --> 00:36:59,640
Speaker 1: there's a reason why she's a hot mess. There's a

703
00:36:59,640 --> 00:37:02,640
Speaker 1: reason why she's blacking out drinking the two times you've

704
00:37:02,680 --> 00:37:05,319
Speaker 1: hung out with her. So I mean that that's a

705
00:37:05,360 --> 00:37:07,319
Speaker 1: pattern of behavior. So if you can find it in

706
00:37:07,360 --> 00:37:10,080
Speaker 1: your heart to be a little bit more open minded

707
00:37:10,120 --> 00:37:12,920
Speaker 1: about maybe helping her figure out what her issues are,

708
00:37:13,480 --> 00:37:16,839
Speaker 1: because that isn't normal behavior. You know, you don't want

709
00:37:16,880 --> 00:37:19,040
Speaker 1: to be out doing that. If that happens to somebody

710
00:37:19,080 --> 00:37:21,920
Speaker 1: wants fine, But if it happens to somebody dent of

711
00:37:21,960 --> 00:37:24,319
Speaker 1: the time, which is the two times you hung out

712
00:37:24,320 --> 00:37:27,080
Speaker 1: with her, that's not a good indicator. So she could

713
00:37:27,120 --> 00:37:31,960
Speaker 1: probably use more of a friend than somebody who's judging her.

714
00:37:32,680 --> 00:37:34,279
Speaker 1: And if you could find it in your heart to

715
00:37:34,320 --> 00:37:35,920
Speaker 1: be that for her, that would be great. It's not

716
00:37:36,000 --> 00:37:38,880
Speaker 1: your responsibility, but it would be a nice exercise and

717
00:37:39,040 --> 00:37:42,759
Speaker 1: human kindness. Samantha, what do you think? I agree with you.

718
00:37:42,880 --> 00:37:46,840
Speaker 1: I feel like if she was carrying shame for that event,

719
00:37:46,920 --> 00:37:49,359
Speaker 1: I feel like you have absolved her of that and

720
00:37:49,400 --> 00:37:52,719
Speaker 1: she shouldn't carry that with her. It happened, it's over.

721
00:37:53,280 --> 00:37:57,840
Speaker 1: She already wasn't responsible for her friends condition, and it

722
00:37:57,920 --> 00:38:01,399
Speaker 1: is unfortunate, but it didn't affect anyone's lives. It didn't

723
00:38:01,400 --> 00:38:04,759
Speaker 1: affect if you don't remember, if it doesn't stand out

724
00:38:04,760 --> 00:38:07,279
Speaker 1: to you, it was unfortunate, but it's not something she

725
00:38:07,280 --> 00:38:10,920
Speaker 1: should really carry. She shouldn't carry any guilt forward. She

726
00:38:11,040 --> 00:38:15,319
Speaker 1: really only has to have a functioning work relationship with

727
00:38:15,360 --> 00:38:19,399
Speaker 1: this person. I feel like what you're suggesting is great.

728
00:38:19,440 --> 00:38:21,359
Speaker 1: If this person needs a friend or they just need

729
00:38:21,440 --> 00:38:25,480
Speaker 1: someone to say. You know, ad percent of our social

730
00:38:25,480 --> 00:38:28,200
Speaker 1: interactions have been really awkward and weird, and they're kind

731
00:38:28,239 --> 00:38:30,840
Speaker 1: of centered on drinking. So if you ever want to

732
00:38:30,840 --> 00:38:34,160
Speaker 1: talk about that, I'm right here. Otherwise, we're co workers.

733
00:38:34,400 --> 00:38:37,160
Speaker 1: We don't have to interact outside of this place. It's

734
00:38:37,200 --> 00:38:38,760
Speaker 1: up to you. I don't want to do that again,

735
00:38:38,800 --> 00:38:40,799
Speaker 1: but I feel like you might be hurting, and if

736
00:38:40,840 --> 00:38:44,319
Speaker 1: that's the case, maybe I could be helpful. And that's it.

737
00:38:44,600 --> 00:38:47,560
Speaker 1: Like you're not responsible, but you're friendly enough to go

738
00:38:47,640 --> 00:38:50,799
Speaker 1: out sometimes, so it feels like there's more than just

739
00:38:50,960 --> 00:38:54,000
Speaker 1: a work relationship. But you don't have to like overstep,

740
00:38:54,400 --> 00:38:57,759
Speaker 1: and empathy is good. Empathy for this person takes you

741
00:38:57,800 --> 00:39:00,680
Speaker 1: outside of your own anger. It can like you can

742
00:39:00,719 --> 00:39:03,959
Speaker 1: alleviate that for you and also think about the things

743
00:39:03,960 --> 00:39:06,160
Speaker 1: that are adding to your anger, like your other friends

744
00:39:06,160 --> 00:39:08,920
Speaker 1: getting tickets and not in fighting. You like that all

745
00:39:08,960 --> 00:39:12,160
Speaker 1: that all worked itself into that situation for you. So

746
00:39:12,440 --> 00:39:14,480
Speaker 1: you know, you are kind of probably in a slightly

747
00:39:14,520 --> 00:39:17,040
Speaker 1: aggravated state because of all of that, trying to kind

748
00:39:17,040 --> 00:39:20,080
Speaker 1: of with the gamesmanship of getting better tickets and doing

749
00:39:20,120 --> 00:39:23,560
Speaker 1: your own thing. So just take all those factors into it.

750
00:39:23,760 --> 00:39:26,560
Speaker 1: But definitely holding on to angers. It doesn't do anyone

751
00:39:26,600 --> 00:39:28,560
Speaker 1: any good, and it certainly doesn't do you any good.

752
00:39:28,840 --> 00:39:36,760
Speaker 1: I totally agree with that. Yeah. Well, our next question

753
00:39:36,880 --> 00:39:40,799
Speaker 1: comes from Charlotte. She says, Dear Chelsea, I wanted to

754
00:39:40,840 --> 00:39:44,279
Speaker 1: write in to ask about mental health social anxiety, in particular,

755
00:39:44,880 --> 00:39:47,440
Speaker 1: every time I have a get together with close friends

756
00:39:47,600 --> 00:39:50,520
Speaker 1: or family, I worry after worried about what people think

757
00:39:50,520 --> 00:39:53,440
Speaker 1: of me. I continue to ruminate about things I said

758
00:39:53,640 --> 00:39:56,600
Speaker 1: or did, and I worry I'm being judged or seen

759
00:39:56,640 --> 00:39:59,680
Speaker 1: in a bad light. I don't have the best confidence

760
00:39:59,680 --> 00:40:02,000
Speaker 1: and wondering how you stay so sure of yourself and

761
00:40:02,040 --> 00:40:05,240
Speaker 1: so comfortable with who you are as a person. Charlotte,

762
00:40:05,280 --> 00:40:10,719
Speaker 1: and she is here with us to chat. Hi Charlotte, Hi, Charlotte,

763
00:40:11,000 --> 00:40:13,680
Speaker 1: how are you? Hi? We have Samantha be here today

764
00:40:13,880 --> 00:40:19,400
Speaker 1: as my guest. Hi, how are you? Fellow Ontarian? Nice?

765
00:40:20,440 --> 00:40:22,520
Speaker 1: Nice to meet you, Nice to meet you. So what

766
00:40:22,560 --> 00:40:25,839
Speaker 1: do you so you are overthinking? You're a little bit

767
00:40:25,880 --> 00:40:29,839
Speaker 1: self conscious? Right? Yeah? Big time? Like I'll go out

768
00:40:30,040 --> 00:40:32,440
Speaker 1: with people, you know, have a good time, and then

769
00:40:32,480 --> 00:40:35,839
Speaker 1: I'll get home and I'll just ruminate, and even if

770
00:40:35,840 --> 00:40:39,960
Speaker 1: it's about like nothing, you know, and I don't know why,

771
00:40:40,440 --> 00:40:44,600
Speaker 1: and I just want to kind of get those intrusive

772
00:40:44,640 --> 00:40:46,840
Speaker 1: thoughts kind of out of my head after having like

773
00:40:46,880 --> 00:40:50,000
Speaker 1: a social interaction, you know, even with people that I

774
00:40:50,040 --> 00:40:53,120
Speaker 1: know really well. So I don't know why that's happening.

775
00:40:53,760 --> 00:40:55,799
Speaker 1: And are you do you find yourself when you're in

776
00:40:55,800 --> 00:40:58,120
Speaker 1: the situations that you're already thinking about what you're going

777
00:40:58,200 --> 00:41:01,480
Speaker 1: to say instead of maybe listening or are you present

778
00:41:01,640 --> 00:41:05,359
Speaker 1: when you're in those moments? Kind of both. I'm kind

779
00:41:05,360 --> 00:41:07,520
Speaker 1: of guilty too of like just thinking about what I

780
00:41:07,560 --> 00:41:10,960
Speaker 1: want to say sometimes Yeah, yeah, maybe I need to

781
00:41:11,040 --> 00:41:12,920
Speaker 1: be a little bit like what you just said, maybe

782
00:41:12,920 --> 00:41:15,799
Speaker 1: listen a little bit more. I always find that when

783
00:41:15,840 --> 00:41:18,960
Speaker 1: I feel self conscious, the best exercise is to listen,

784
00:41:19,640 --> 00:41:22,279
Speaker 1: because then it takes you out of your own headspace,

785
00:41:22,360 --> 00:41:24,080
Speaker 1: you know what I mean, instead of thinking because we've

786
00:41:24,080 --> 00:41:27,200
Speaker 1: all been there and you're not by yourself. I've experienced

787
00:41:27,239 --> 00:41:30,919
Speaker 1: bouts of self consciousness after bouts of huge misplaced self

788
00:41:30,920 --> 00:41:32,719
Speaker 1: confidence where I was like, wait a second, I thought

789
00:41:32,719 --> 00:41:34,960
Speaker 1: I was that person and now I'm sitting here wondering

790
00:41:34,960 --> 00:41:36,879
Speaker 1: what I'm gonna say when this. You know, when there's

791
00:41:36,920 --> 00:41:41,200
Speaker 1: a lull and the best antidote to the noise in

792
00:41:41,239 --> 00:41:44,120
Speaker 1: your brain is to listen, you know, and and being

793
00:41:44,200 --> 00:41:46,320
Speaker 1: in that moment so that you could hear what somebody

794
00:41:46,360 --> 00:41:49,440
Speaker 1: is saying, because there is no wrong way to be present,

795
00:41:49,520 --> 00:41:52,439
Speaker 1: you know, unless you're a complete asshole lunatic who's going

796
00:41:52,520 --> 00:41:55,759
Speaker 1: off on people like you're not doing anything offensive. I

797
00:41:55,760 --> 00:41:57,600
Speaker 1: can tell by talking to you for two minutes that

798
00:41:57,680 --> 00:42:02,480
Speaker 1: you're totally easy going night person. You know you're not.

799
00:42:02,920 --> 00:42:05,200
Speaker 1: You're not going to be pissing people off left and right.

800
00:42:05,360 --> 00:42:09,560
Speaker 1: So the over analyzation that are over analysis. I should

801
00:42:09,640 --> 00:42:13,200
Speaker 1: say that a lot of us experiences a temporary thing

802
00:42:13,680 --> 00:42:16,239
Speaker 1: and it's just usually is derivative of what's going on

803
00:42:16,280 --> 00:42:17,920
Speaker 1: in your life at the time. You know, if you're

804
00:42:17,960 --> 00:42:21,520
Speaker 1: feeling other forms of not being completely settled, but it's

805
00:42:21,520 --> 00:42:24,680
Speaker 1: not a permanent state of mind. So first understand that, like,

806
00:42:24,800 --> 00:42:26,879
Speaker 1: don't think, oh, this is how things are going to be.

807
00:42:27,120 --> 00:42:30,400
Speaker 1: They're not. Nothing stays. There's no permanence with any of this,

808
00:42:30,960 --> 00:42:32,799
Speaker 1: and that's something you know, we all know just from

809
00:42:32,840 --> 00:42:35,880
Speaker 1: life experience. But it's not uncommon to go through about

810
00:42:35,880 --> 00:42:38,520
Speaker 1: of self consciousness, and I think it's just about getting

811
00:42:38,520 --> 00:42:40,719
Speaker 1: your head out of that. You know, there's books you

812
00:42:40,719 --> 00:42:44,200
Speaker 1: can read on mindfulness or present moment awareness or any

813
00:42:44,280 --> 00:42:46,600
Speaker 1: of that stuff, which kind of they all say the

814
00:42:46,680 --> 00:42:50,600
Speaker 1: same thing, But it's just about really being present gives

815
00:42:50,600 --> 00:42:54,279
Speaker 1: you the gift of not being so self conscious and

816
00:42:54,440 --> 00:42:57,040
Speaker 1: you know, really being in the moment and noticing when

817
00:42:57,040 --> 00:42:59,520
Speaker 1: your thoughts get derailed to take yourself back to the

818
00:42:59,560 --> 00:43:02,279
Speaker 1: moment you're in, whether it's eating a sandwich and being

819
00:43:02,320 --> 00:43:05,400
Speaker 1: completely focused on that, or if you're doing your emails,

820
00:43:05,560 --> 00:43:08,160
Speaker 1: being completely focused on that, not doing it while you're

821
00:43:08,160 --> 00:43:10,319
Speaker 1: watching a show, while you're reading the paper. You know,

822
00:43:10,320 --> 00:43:12,279
Speaker 1: I used to work out when read the paper and

823
00:43:12,320 --> 00:43:15,000
Speaker 1: have the news on and then listen to a podcast.

824
00:43:15,080 --> 00:43:19,520
Speaker 1: Like obviously that wasn't working. So like really just being present,

825
00:43:19,680 --> 00:43:22,480
Speaker 1: overly present right now in this moment because you are

826
00:43:22,560 --> 00:43:25,600
Speaker 1: feeling this way, but overly present, you know, when you're walking,

827
00:43:25,800 --> 00:43:28,440
Speaker 1: literally walk and enjoy the leaves on the trees and

828
00:43:28,480 --> 00:43:31,480
Speaker 1: what you're looking at and noticing the people. You just

829
00:43:31,480 --> 00:43:33,760
Speaker 1: have to get yourself a little bit outside of yourself

830
00:43:34,040 --> 00:43:37,719
Speaker 1: and like over exercise that kind of pattern of behavior. Yeah,

831
00:43:37,800 --> 00:43:39,920
Speaker 1: that makes sense. It's like I was worrying today too.

832
00:43:39,920 --> 00:43:43,280
Speaker 1: I'm like, oh, am, I gonna think about this conversation

833
00:43:43,480 --> 00:43:46,840
Speaker 1: and worry about, oh did I say the wrong thing

834
00:43:47,160 --> 00:43:49,440
Speaker 1: or you know, And I have a pretty dry sense

835
00:43:49,440 --> 00:43:52,440
Speaker 1: of humor too, and some people don't get it, so

836
00:43:52,520 --> 00:43:55,160
Speaker 1: I worry about that as well. So I think that

837
00:43:55,280 --> 00:43:58,520
Speaker 1: makes sense about just like paying attention more. You could

838
00:43:58,520 --> 00:44:00,600
Speaker 1: walk away from this conversation no going that you did

839
00:44:00,600 --> 00:44:04,319
Speaker 1: not say anything wrong or weird, and that no one

840
00:44:04,440 --> 00:44:07,440
Speaker 1: We're all like we're all like sitting here going I

841
00:44:07,480 --> 00:44:09,759
Speaker 1: want the best. I literally want the best for you.

842
00:44:09,960 --> 00:44:13,160
Speaker 1: I feel like this is so familiar, Like I totally

843
00:44:13,239 --> 00:44:15,239
Speaker 1: understand where you're coming from. I feel like I've been

844
00:44:15,239 --> 00:44:17,320
Speaker 1: in this position to where I'm like, oh did I

845
00:44:17,920 --> 00:44:19,759
Speaker 1: what did I do? Like, let me just like go

846
00:44:19,960 --> 00:44:22,319
Speaker 1: back over every conversation and go like, oh did I

847
00:44:22,520 --> 00:44:25,239
Speaker 1: Are they thinking about me right now? And I'll tell

848
00:44:25,280 --> 00:44:27,480
Speaker 1: you what. One of the only gifts of being fifty

849
00:44:27,520 --> 00:44:30,000
Speaker 1: two is that you really start to get a clear

850
00:44:30,040 --> 00:44:32,480
Speaker 1: picture of how much people are not thinking about you,

851
00:44:33,040 --> 00:44:35,759
Speaker 1: Like how much they are actually not going through the

852
00:44:35,800 --> 00:44:38,759
Speaker 1: conversation and thinking like, oh, what a funk up, what

853
00:44:38,880 --> 00:44:41,960
Speaker 1: a weird thing that she said? They're actually just like

854
00:44:42,120 --> 00:44:44,719
Speaker 1: living their lives and going like that was really fun? Right,

855
00:44:44,960 --> 00:44:47,120
Speaker 1: We went out for we had brunch that was really fun.

856
00:44:47,160 --> 00:44:50,320
Speaker 1: I really enjoyed that we should do that again. They're

857
00:44:50,320 --> 00:44:53,920
Speaker 1: probably having like a really positive take on it. And

858
00:44:53,960 --> 00:44:55,440
Speaker 1: if I can say one more thing, and this is

859
00:44:55,480 --> 00:44:57,920
Speaker 1: probably not like I don't know if this is healthy

860
00:44:58,239 --> 00:44:59,839
Speaker 1: or if this is bad, So I'm going to just

861
00:45:00,080 --> 00:45:03,080
Speaker 1: say what I'm going to say and like take it

862
00:45:03,160 --> 00:45:06,400
Speaker 1: or leave it. But when um years ago, when I

863
00:45:06,440 --> 00:45:09,560
Speaker 1: was like starting this show, my my husband always seems

864
00:45:09,560 --> 00:45:11,920
Speaker 1: like really confident. He's got this Like I don't know

865
00:45:11,960 --> 00:45:14,200
Speaker 1: if it's a masculine quality or whatever, it's just maybe

866
00:45:14,200 --> 00:45:16,919
Speaker 1: it's adjacent quality that he never really seems to worry

867
00:45:16,920 --> 00:45:19,560
Speaker 1: about what other people think of him. He never seems

868
00:45:19,600 --> 00:45:21,400
Speaker 1: to worry about it, and like it never would occur

869
00:45:21,480 --> 00:45:24,080
Speaker 1: to him in a million years to be like, was

870
00:45:24,160 --> 00:45:27,520
Speaker 1: he did he think that I was too loud that time? Never?

871
00:45:28,080 --> 00:45:31,040
Speaker 1: And I remember asking him. I like cornered him in

872
00:45:31,040 --> 00:45:34,000
Speaker 1: the bathroom once because I was like, please help me

873
00:45:34,239 --> 00:45:37,400
Speaker 1: release myself. Like I literally articulated this. I was like,

874
00:45:37,719 --> 00:45:40,560
Speaker 1: help me release myself from worrying what other people are

875
00:45:40,560 --> 00:45:42,279
Speaker 1: thinking about me all the time. I was like, how

876
00:45:42,320 --> 00:45:44,440
Speaker 1: do you do it? Literally? What do you do? Is

877
00:45:44,440 --> 00:45:47,560
Speaker 1: it like a man quality? Is this a masculine quality?

878
00:45:47,680 --> 00:45:50,120
Speaker 1: Is this adjacent thing? Like how do you push out

879
00:45:50,200 --> 00:45:53,000
Speaker 1: thoughts of what other people think of you? And he

880
00:45:53,080 --> 00:45:55,440
Speaker 1: was like oh, he was like it's so easy. And

881
00:45:55,480 --> 00:45:57,880
Speaker 1: I was like, what do you do? Because I was

882
00:45:57,960 --> 00:46:01,000
Speaker 1: like just embroiled in all this up. He was like, oh,

883
00:46:01,080 --> 00:46:03,360
Speaker 1: if one of those thoughts pokes into my head, I

884
00:46:03,440 --> 00:46:07,560
Speaker 1: just physically push it out. I was just like, not now, Satan,

885
00:46:07,800 --> 00:46:11,960
Speaker 1: and he just almost in his brain goes, I'm not

886
00:46:12,040 --> 00:46:15,680
Speaker 1: doing this right now. And I started doing that if

887
00:46:15,719 --> 00:46:18,520
Speaker 1: I felt like insecurity creeping, and I started going like,

888
00:46:18,960 --> 00:46:21,160
Speaker 1: I don't have time for this right now. This is

889
00:46:21,320 --> 00:46:24,560
Speaker 1: not helping. And then I would do another hobby or

890
00:46:24,600 --> 00:46:27,239
Speaker 1: something like, do something else an activity that was like

891
00:46:27,320 --> 00:46:30,040
Speaker 1: really physical, and it just got me out of that

892
00:46:30,160 --> 00:46:32,919
Speaker 1: plane of thinking. I don't know if that's helpful in

893
00:46:32,960 --> 00:46:36,080
Speaker 1: any way. No, I think that is helpful. My husband's

894
00:46:36,080 --> 00:46:38,200
Speaker 1: the exact same way. He does not here. He just

895
00:46:38,360 --> 00:46:40,360
Speaker 1: lives his life. And I'm like, oh my god, like

896
00:46:40,600 --> 00:46:44,120
Speaker 1: do you think I'm weird? You know? It's like it's

897
00:46:44,160 --> 00:46:46,360
Speaker 1: so funny, like if you as you're saying this, Samantha,

898
00:46:46,400 --> 00:46:48,319
Speaker 1: I'm like, God, I was just thinking in my mind,

899
00:46:48,480 --> 00:46:50,480
Speaker 1: how many men have ever been like, God, I hope

900
00:46:50,520 --> 00:46:52,520
Speaker 1: I didn't say the wrong thing. It's like it's a

901
00:46:52,520 --> 00:46:56,920
Speaker 1: total male female dynamic like that we've created from probably

902
00:46:57,000 --> 00:46:59,960
Speaker 1: from them questioning our thoughts and feelings. I will say

903
00:47:00,600 --> 00:47:04,160
Speaker 1: my husband is actually like this, so he I hope

904
00:47:04,160 --> 00:47:05,840
Speaker 1: this is okay to share as he's here in the

905
00:47:05,920 --> 00:47:08,600
Speaker 1: room with me. But he does have the same sort

906
00:47:08,600 --> 00:47:12,120
Speaker 1: of social anxiety where like the day after a party

907
00:47:12,280 --> 00:47:14,600
Speaker 1: he ruminates on it and he's like, oh my god,

908
00:47:14,640 --> 00:47:16,719
Speaker 1: I hope I didn't sound stupid. I hope they liked me,

909
00:47:16,760 --> 00:47:19,120
Speaker 1: And I'm like, what are you talking about? Like they were,

910
00:47:19,160 --> 00:47:22,520
Speaker 1: they were charmed by you. You're cracking jokes, You're fun

911
00:47:22,960 --> 00:47:26,560
Speaker 1: like you were conversing. He's so much fun at a party,

912
00:47:26,560 --> 00:47:29,840
Speaker 1: and he's everyone loves him. He's tall and handsome and

913
00:47:29,880 --> 00:47:33,279
Speaker 1: well spoken and smart and generally great. But I think

914
00:47:33,360 --> 00:47:35,160
Speaker 1: Chelsea's right, like it is one of those things that

915
00:47:35,200 --> 00:47:38,279
Speaker 1: has to come from inside and Sam as well. It's

916
00:47:38,280 --> 00:47:40,799
Speaker 1: like it has to come from inside of you, either

917
00:47:40,880 --> 00:47:43,440
Speaker 1: pushing it out or like being present in the moment

918
00:47:43,480 --> 00:47:46,680
Speaker 1: and experiencing what's really going on. No amount of my

919
00:47:46,760 --> 00:47:49,480
Speaker 1: reassuring him that he was great at the party, convinces

920
00:47:49,560 --> 00:47:51,080
Speaker 1: him he was great at the party. It sort of

921
00:47:51,080 --> 00:47:54,200
Speaker 1: has to come from inside. That's a great point. It

922
00:47:54,280 --> 00:47:57,040
Speaker 1: does have to come from whatever technique you use. But

923
00:47:57,120 --> 00:47:59,480
Speaker 1: I do find like business is a cure for a

924
00:47:59,520 --> 00:48:02,160
Speaker 1: lot of that. Getting outside of your own body in

925
00:48:02,200 --> 00:48:04,279
Speaker 1: a way and being like very busy with something is

926
00:48:04,320 --> 00:48:08,719
Speaker 1: helpful in terms of just not ruminating on things. And

927
00:48:08,760 --> 00:48:11,400
Speaker 1: also there's a couple of good books that just remind

928
00:48:11,440 --> 00:48:14,080
Speaker 1: you and give you, Like there's one called Finding Peace

929
00:48:14,080 --> 00:48:17,080
Speaker 1: in a Frantic World. It's written by Mark Williams. It's

930
00:48:17,080 --> 00:48:19,600
Speaker 1: like a beginner's guide for mindfulness, Like it just gives

931
00:48:19,600 --> 00:48:21,799
Speaker 1: you the basic steps when you're too much in your

932
00:48:21,800 --> 00:48:26,400
Speaker 1: head to just remember that acts of service, helping someone else,

933
00:48:26,719 --> 00:48:29,399
Speaker 1: focusing on someone else's issues, being like a good friend

934
00:48:29,400 --> 00:48:31,839
Speaker 1: to somebody else, or whoever's in your life, that will

935
00:48:31,880 --> 00:48:34,200
Speaker 1: always take you out of yourself, you know. And then

936
00:48:34,239 --> 00:48:36,839
Speaker 1: also the Power of Now by kartl Just it all

937
00:48:37,440 --> 00:48:41,800
Speaker 1: espouses the entire practice of just always knowing that those

938
00:48:41,840 --> 00:48:44,880
Speaker 1: thoughts are your ego, those thoughts are your negative voice

939
00:48:44,920 --> 00:48:47,520
Speaker 1: trying to drag you in. So saying no, get out

940
00:48:47,960 --> 00:48:50,759
Speaker 1: is exactly the way to treat those thoughts, you know,

941
00:48:50,920 --> 00:48:53,440
Speaker 1: like there's no room for you here, and once you

942
00:48:53,480 --> 00:48:56,480
Speaker 1: start implementing those things, you'll get out of this much

943
00:48:56,560 --> 00:49:00,160
Speaker 1: quicker than you think. And also to be forget being

944
00:49:00,200 --> 00:49:03,200
Speaker 1: of yourself like this is normal, Like I want you

945
00:49:03,200 --> 00:49:06,840
Speaker 1: to be kind to yourself and know that like every

946
00:49:06,920 --> 00:49:10,560
Speaker 1: human person feels these thoughts, you know what I mean.

947
00:49:10,680 --> 00:49:14,080
Speaker 1: And I think that the struggle. I think everybody has

948
00:49:14,480 --> 00:49:17,839
Speaker 1: this struggle to to great some extent, like maybe for

949
00:49:17,880 --> 00:49:20,160
Speaker 1: some people it's not a big struggle, but everybody has

950
00:49:20,160 --> 00:49:24,160
Speaker 1: those feelings of like afterwards going like judging yourself, and

951
00:49:24,239 --> 00:49:28,040
Speaker 1: I want for you that you forgive yourself. Yeah, you

952
00:49:28,080 --> 00:49:31,640
Speaker 1: know we all feel it sucks. Yeah, the thought of

953
00:49:31,800 --> 00:49:34,480
Speaker 1: people being unhappy with me is like the worst thing.

954
00:49:34,800 --> 00:49:36,759
Speaker 1: I don't know why. I don't know why. I don't

955
00:49:36,760 --> 00:49:39,520
Speaker 1: know how to be kind to myself and know that

956
00:49:39,600 --> 00:49:43,120
Speaker 1: nothing happened, But if somebody is unhappy with me, how

957
00:49:43,160 --> 00:49:45,600
Speaker 1: to like kind of get past that, if that makes

958
00:49:45,600 --> 00:49:47,839
Speaker 1: any sense, like just being like, well that's what I said,

959
00:49:47,840 --> 00:49:50,480
Speaker 1: and I said what I said, you know, with me

960
00:49:50,520 --> 00:49:53,759
Speaker 1: not being offensive, but yeah, but also think about like

961
00:49:53,840 --> 00:49:55,719
Speaker 1: you know, think of yourself as a little girl or

962
00:49:55,760 --> 00:49:58,160
Speaker 1: do you think of yourself as as your daughter. Would

963
00:49:58,160 --> 00:50:00,239
Speaker 1: you ever want your daughter to feel that way, to

964
00:50:00,360 --> 00:50:02,720
Speaker 1: feel like she has to please everybody in this world?

965
00:50:03,120 --> 00:50:05,680
Speaker 1: You know, that's a fake construct that has been built

966
00:50:05,800 --> 00:50:08,120
Speaker 1: up for women to behave in a certain way that

967
00:50:08,239 --> 00:50:10,560
Speaker 1: is people pleasing. And do you want to be that

968
00:50:10,640 --> 00:50:13,160
Speaker 1: kind of girl who fucking wants to be that? You know,

969
00:50:13,280 --> 00:50:16,080
Speaker 1: somebody who's making everybody happy? You know, then you're just

970
00:50:16,120 --> 00:50:18,680
Speaker 1: a product of your society instead of being an original.

971
00:50:19,160 --> 00:50:21,600
Speaker 1: So focus on that and think about yourself as a

972
00:50:21,640 --> 00:50:23,160
Speaker 1: little girl, Like what would you do if it was

973
00:50:23,200 --> 00:50:25,680
Speaker 1: your daughter. You wouldn't allow You would be horrified for

974
00:50:25,719 --> 00:50:28,160
Speaker 1: her to feel this way. Right, It's not your job

975
00:50:28,239 --> 00:50:31,080
Speaker 1: to please everybody. It's your job a to please yourself

976
00:50:31,160 --> 00:50:33,839
Speaker 1: and make yourself and the people you love happy and

977
00:50:33,880 --> 00:50:36,840
Speaker 1: make them feel safe and secure in your relationship. But

978
00:50:36,960 --> 00:50:39,520
Speaker 1: beyond that, you don't have an obligation to the world,

979
00:50:40,000 --> 00:50:42,400
Speaker 1: you know, and you should start try some you know,

980
00:50:42,600 --> 00:50:47,239
Speaker 1: try headspace. Headspace has all these like beginning courses about that,

981
00:50:47,480 --> 00:50:50,319
Speaker 1: about the voices in your head, about that dialogue, and

982
00:50:50,400 --> 00:50:52,719
Speaker 1: about focusing, you know, and if you just even put

983
00:50:52,800 --> 00:50:55,040
Speaker 1: in five minutes a day of that, you just start

984
00:50:55,120 --> 00:50:57,520
Speaker 1: to create a different narrative in your head in a

985
00:50:57,520 --> 00:51:00,480
Speaker 1: different way that you're speaking to yourself, and that has

986
00:51:00,520 --> 00:51:03,920
Speaker 1: a domino effect. Yeah, you're a three dimensional person. You're

987
00:51:03,960 --> 00:51:06,080
Speaker 1: a human person too, and you have a right to

988
00:51:06,200 --> 00:51:08,399
Speaker 1: exist in this world and believe certain things and say

989
00:51:08,600 --> 00:51:12,479
Speaker 1: whatever you want. And if people don't like you because

990
00:51:12,520 --> 00:51:15,040
Speaker 1: you said one thing the night before, then they're not

991
00:51:15,320 --> 00:51:18,520
Speaker 1: really worth knowing. If they don't like you for the

992
00:51:18,520 --> 00:51:21,920
Speaker 1: three dimensional self that you are, like, if they really

993
00:51:22,440 --> 00:51:25,560
Speaker 1: are so affected by that, then holy sh it. And

994
00:51:25,600 --> 00:51:27,120
Speaker 1: I would also like to go on the record and

995
00:51:27,160 --> 00:51:29,719
Speaker 1: say that I am in Canada four months out of

996
00:51:29,719 --> 00:51:32,640
Speaker 1: the year and no Canadian has ever offended me, So

997
00:51:32,760 --> 00:51:36,759
Speaker 1: you also have that on your side. Thank you well.

998
00:51:36,800 --> 00:51:39,760
Speaker 1: And I just wanted to thank you Chelsea too. Besides

999
00:51:39,800 --> 00:51:42,839
Speaker 1: my mom, you're like a huge inspiration for just being

1000
00:51:42,880 --> 00:51:46,440
Speaker 1: like an outspoken woman and still being mindful of other people,

1001
00:51:46,560 --> 00:51:49,480
Speaker 1: but when somebody's trying to bring you down, just telling

1002
00:51:49,520 --> 00:51:52,320
Speaker 1: them to get lost and just to be a strong woman.

1003
00:51:52,320 --> 00:51:54,399
Speaker 1: And I just wanted to thank you for that. Well,

1004
00:51:54,440 --> 00:51:56,480
Speaker 1: you're welcome, but you are. You're a strong woman too.

1005
00:51:56,520 --> 00:51:58,400
Speaker 1: You know, we just have to tap into our reservoir

1006
00:51:58,440 --> 00:52:01,160
Speaker 1: of strength and sometimes we don't strong, but you're strong.

1007
00:52:02,120 --> 00:52:05,600
Speaker 1: Thank you appreciate that. Well, good luck with everything, and

1008
00:52:05,719 --> 00:52:07,920
Speaker 1: please pick up those books. Okay, those two books, I

1009
00:52:07,920 --> 00:52:10,720
Speaker 1: wrote them down. Great, great, I'm sure you can google

1010
00:52:10,719 --> 00:52:13,640
Speaker 1: them and find them right away. Yeah, thank you so much.

1011
00:52:13,760 --> 00:52:17,200
Speaker 1: I appreciate it. Thanks, take care you okay, speak to

1012
00:52:17,239 --> 00:52:23,200
Speaker 1: you soon. Bye. Oh oh my god, I know, I know,

1013
00:52:23,840 --> 00:52:27,280
Speaker 1: but you know something. When I experienced my first adult

1014
00:52:27,400 --> 00:52:30,000
Speaker 1: self doubt or insecure phase, because I went for so

1015
00:52:30,040 --> 00:52:32,960
Speaker 1: long without ever even thinking about what people thought about me,

1016
00:52:33,080 --> 00:52:36,719
Speaker 1: just like you know, who cares like that arrogant attitude

1017
00:52:36,719 --> 00:52:40,720
Speaker 1: almost and then going through my first bout of like, oh,

1018
00:52:40,800 --> 00:52:45,359
Speaker 1: self examination, and then the self flagellation that goes with that,

1019
00:52:45,440 --> 00:52:48,239
Speaker 1: where you go, oh wait a second, and then the

1020
00:52:48,280 --> 00:52:51,600
Speaker 1: self consciousness that is coupled with that. It's such an

1021
00:52:51,760 --> 00:52:55,719
Speaker 1: unpleasant and unwelcome feeling to be in his to be

1022
00:52:55,800 --> 00:52:59,080
Speaker 1: worried all the time about something that other people are

1023
00:52:59,200 --> 00:53:03,359
Speaker 1: not worrying about is not a great feeling. It can

1024
00:53:03,400 --> 00:53:06,680
Speaker 1: be really debilitating, like just to get caught in that

1025
00:53:07,120 --> 00:53:09,640
Speaker 1: and to like live to be just like so steeped

1026
00:53:09,640 --> 00:53:12,799
Speaker 1: and worry. Yeah. Second, guessing yourself is not a fun

1027
00:53:12,920 --> 00:53:15,879
Speaker 1: environment to be in, really not fun, not fun at all.

1028
00:53:16,400 --> 00:53:19,759
Speaker 1: And I think also post pandemic, I kinda after my

1029
00:53:19,880 --> 00:53:22,279
Speaker 1: first few interactions after that, I was like, Oh, we're

1030
00:53:22,280 --> 00:53:24,240
Speaker 1: all just gonna be a little weird for a little while,

1031
00:53:24,560 --> 00:53:26,959
Speaker 1: because I felt like I don't usually feel that way

1032
00:53:27,239 --> 00:53:31,000
Speaker 1: that afterwards, like was I weird? Was I weird? And

1033
00:53:31,640 --> 00:53:34,440
Speaker 1: I had engagement party for one of my cousins and

1034
00:53:35,120 --> 00:53:38,800
Speaker 1: I felt like as I was talking to her sister

1035
00:53:38,880 --> 00:53:42,040
Speaker 1: and my other cousin, I'm like, I just keep laughing

1036
00:53:42,080 --> 00:53:43,879
Speaker 1: at all her stories. I don't know what to say

1037
00:53:43,920 --> 00:53:46,040
Speaker 1: back to her, like thank god, she's telling so many

1038
00:53:46,040 --> 00:53:48,960
Speaker 1: funny stories. And then the next day she texted me

1039
00:53:49,000 --> 00:53:50,959
Speaker 1: and she's like, I'm sorry if I was talking too much,

1040
00:53:51,120 --> 00:53:52,520
Speaker 1: Like I was like, oh, wait, we're all just going

1041
00:53:52,560 --> 00:53:54,960
Speaker 1: to feel like we're acting really strange for a while.

1042
00:53:55,360 --> 00:53:57,160
Speaker 1: You know. It does feel strange, yeah, And I'm like

1043
00:53:57,239 --> 00:54:01,400
Speaker 1: really quick to anger, like little things. I'm like, ohs

1044
00:54:01,600 --> 00:54:05,400
Speaker 1: angry about this. It's nothing. It is a bit of

1045
00:54:05,400 --> 00:54:11,120
Speaker 1: a roller coaster seeing the lower part of people's faces. Yeah,

1046
00:54:10,239 --> 00:54:14,120
Speaker 1: it is. And I definitely can relate to a post

1047
00:54:14,120 --> 00:54:17,360
Speaker 1: pandemic socializing where I was like ship what am I

1048
00:54:17,440 --> 00:54:20,640
Speaker 1: going to say now? Like, Okay, someone said something and

1049
00:54:20,680 --> 00:54:23,680
Speaker 1: now it's my turn to return the tennis ball. And

1050
00:54:23,719 --> 00:54:26,520
Speaker 1: I was like, I mean, even my sister goes, what

1051
00:54:26,640 --> 00:54:27,920
Speaker 1: is wrong with you? I go, I don't know what

1052
00:54:28,000 --> 00:54:30,440
Speaker 1: to say to people anymore. And I've never been short

1053
00:54:30,520 --> 00:54:33,359
Speaker 1: for words, so I can only imagine what somebody who's

1054
00:54:33,480 --> 00:54:36,440
Speaker 1: more shy or less sure of themselves must be feeling.

1055
00:54:36,480 --> 00:54:38,719
Speaker 1: But yeah, for sure, the pandemic meet us all a

1056
00:54:38,719 --> 00:54:43,319
Speaker 1: bit of a hot mess. Yeah, definitely. Well, our next

1057
00:54:43,400 --> 00:54:48,640
Speaker 1: question comes from back. She's twenty eight. She says, Dear Chelsea,

1058
00:54:48,840 --> 00:54:51,799
Speaker 1: I'm in a pickle. I have an intense fear that

1059
00:54:51,840 --> 00:54:54,759
Speaker 1: my partner of two years will ultimately lose interest in

1060
00:54:54,840 --> 00:54:57,920
Speaker 1: me and fall out of love eventually. My opinion of

1061
00:54:57,960 --> 00:55:00,720
Speaker 1: men isn't exactly high. I seem to box my partner

1062
00:55:00,760 --> 00:55:03,120
Speaker 1: into the same category that most men have fallen into

1063
00:55:03,160 --> 00:55:07,399
Speaker 1: in my life, ultimately fickle, selfish, and ignorant. My self

1064
00:55:07,560 --> 00:55:10,440
Speaker 1: esteem isn't the highest, and I'm riddled with anxiety that

1065
00:55:10,480 --> 00:55:12,760
Speaker 1: he will find me less attractive as I get older,

1066
00:55:12,960 --> 00:55:16,839
Speaker 1: or god forbid, bear his children. I'm constantly thinking of

1067
00:55:16,920 --> 00:55:20,440
Speaker 1: self sabotaging the relationship as the fear of rejection is

1068
00:55:20,520 --> 00:55:23,920
Speaker 1: so intense. How do I stay confident and address these

1069
00:55:23,960 --> 00:55:29,200
Speaker 1: fears without projecting needy girlfriend vibes onto him love back. Well,

1070
00:55:29,239 --> 00:55:31,280
Speaker 1: I would say that when you are living in fear

1071
00:55:31,440 --> 00:55:35,680
Speaker 1: and based out of fear, you are going to perpetuate

1072
00:55:35,760 --> 00:55:39,440
Speaker 1: that feeling and it can become a self fulfilling prophecy.

1073
00:55:39,520 --> 00:55:42,640
Speaker 1: So you have to really work hard on getting yourself

1074
00:55:42,680 --> 00:55:45,640
Speaker 1: out of that mindset because it's a waste of your time,

1075
00:55:45,719 --> 00:55:47,880
Speaker 1: and it's a waste of your energy, and you're almost

1076
00:55:47,920 --> 00:55:51,399
Speaker 1: working against yourself. So you've been with somebody for two

1077
00:55:51,480 --> 00:55:54,200
Speaker 1: years and you have to start thinking. You know, every

1078
00:55:54,239 --> 00:55:58,080
Speaker 1: negative thought comes with a positive counterpart. That's physics. Every

1079
00:55:58,200 --> 00:56:01,600
Speaker 1: action has a reaction, and if you can start changing

1080
00:56:01,640 --> 00:56:05,160
Speaker 1: that dialogue in your head, that's what you have to do. First,

1081
00:56:05,280 --> 00:56:07,520
Speaker 1: you have to get in control of the fact that

1082
00:56:07,760 --> 00:56:10,480
Speaker 1: you don't have control over the future. You have control

1083
00:56:10,520 --> 00:56:13,400
Speaker 1: over how you behave You can't control what's going to

1084
00:56:13,480 --> 00:56:15,360
Speaker 1: happen with your partner, if he's going to stay in

1085
00:56:15,440 --> 00:56:17,480
Speaker 1: love with you, if he's going to remain in love

1086
00:56:17,520 --> 00:56:20,360
Speaker 1: with you. You can only control how you conduct yourself.

1087
00:56:20,719 --> 00:56:23,560
Speaker 1: So even if you don't believe it, right now that

1088
00:56:23,640 --> 00:56:25,560
Speaker 1: you're worthy of all of that. You have to start

1089
00:56:25,600 --> 00:56:28,920
Speaker 1: acting like it. You have to start believing that you

1090
00:56:29,000 --> 00:56:30,719
Speaker 1: do have all of the things that you have that

1091
00:56:30,760 --> 00:56:34,520
Speaker 1: you offer the relationship. You can't worry about aging. Everyone's aging.

1092
00:56:34,680 --> 00:56:36,920
Speaker 1: You know, these are things that are happening to everybody.

1093
00:56:36,960 --> 00:56:40,920
Speaker 1: So getting so hyper focused on this relationship and it

1094
00:56:41,040 --> 00:56:45,239
Speaker 1: falling apart is a dangerous pattern of thought for you.

1095
00:56:45,680 --> 00:56:47,799
Speaker 1: So there is a book that my friend told me

1096
00:56:47,840 --> 00:56:51,840
Speaker 1: about once when she was feeling similar. It's called rejection Proof,

1097
00:56:52,480 --> 00:56:55,040
Speaker 1: Rejection of Proof or rejection proof or something. I know

1098
00:56:55,080 --> 00:56:56,799
Speaker 1: there's an umbrella on the cover because I have it

1099
00:56:56,840 --> 00:56:58,920
Speaker 1: at my house, And of course I haven't read that

1100
00:56:58,960 --> 00:57:03,120
Speaker 1: one yet, but I'll get to it. But you have

1101
00:57:03,280 --> 00:57:07,640
Speaker 1: to really just start working on having a positive dialogue

1102
00:57:07,640 --> 00:57:11,160
Speaker 1: with yourself. Immediately. Pick up as many books as you

1103
00:57:11,200 --> 00:57:14,120
Speaker 1: can until you read something that strikes a chord within

1104
00:57:14,239 --> 00:57:17,480
Speaker 1: you that you can like turn into a manifestation for yourself.

1105
00:57:17,840 --> 00:57:20,280
Speaker 1: Because all of our wasted a time and energy is

1106
00:57:20,320 --> 00:57:22,760
Speaker 1: spent on fear. And when you come from a place

1107
00:57:22,800 --> 00:57:25,880
Speaker 1: of hope and positivity instead of fear, and you build

1108
00:57:25,880 --> 00:57:29,520
Speaker 1: yourself up like to courage and bravery, then the fear

1109
00:57:29,560 --> 00:57:31,800
Speaker 1: is eliminated, and it's down below and it's something that

1110
00:57:31,840 --> 00:57:34,480
Speaker 1: you don't even recognize in yourself. But it's not gonna

1111
00:57:34,520 --> 00:57:36,880
Speaker 1: happen overnight. You have to be an active participant in

1112
00:57:36,920 --> 00:57:40,200
Speaker 1: getting yourself healthier. Oh, this is great advice. This is

1113
00:57:40,240 --> 00:57:42,520
Speaker 1: great advice because it is hard to operate from a

1114
00:57:42,600 --> 00:57:45,160
Speaker 1: place of fear and you can't control the future. You

1115
00:57:45,200 --> 00:57:49,560
Speaker 1: have no say in how the future unfolds. I also

1116
00:57:49,680 --> 00:57:52,960
Speaker 1: do think like if you're in a positive if you

1117
00:57:52,960 --> 00:57:54,560
Speaker 1: really take a step back and you look at your

1118
00:57:54,560 --> 00:57:57,720
Speaker 1: relationship and you go, actually, it's he's never given me

1119
00:57:57,720 --> 00:58:00,480
Speaker 1: any indication that he's falling out of what we have

1120
00:58:00,520 --> 00:58:03,840
Speaker 1: a very state. He would be very surprised to hear

1121
00:58:04,000 --> 00:58:06,840
Speaker 1: that I am very worried about the future and these

1122
00:58:06,920 --> 00:58:11,160
Speaker 1: kind of irrational thoughts. Like it's okay to have those

1123
00:58:11,200 --> 00:58:15,520
Speaker 1: conversations with your partner, not dwell on them, but just

1124
00:58:15,720 --> 00:58:20,720
Speaker 1: to honestly say, I'm having like irrational thoughts. Can I

1125
00:58:20,760 --> 00:58:22,200
Speaker 1: just tell you what they are and then I can

1126
00:58:22,200 --> 00:58:26,400
Speaker 1: maybe put them to rest. If your partner loves you,

1127
00:58:26,560 --> 00:58:29,120
Speaker 1: which it sounds like you are in a really solid

1128
00:58:29,200 --> 00:58:32,400
Speaker 1: relationship as long as you're not living and acting from

1129
00:58:32,400 --> 00:58:35,040
Speaker 1: a place of fear all the time, if you're able

1130
00:58:35,080 --> 00:58:37,400
Speaker 1: to talk about things that, like, you should be able

1131
00:58:37,440 --> 00:58:40,120
Speaker 1: to talk about weird fears that you're having about the future,

1132
00:58:40,360 --> 00:58:43,160
Speaker 1: Like you should be able to say that. I think

1133
00:58:43,680 --> 00:58:45,880
Speaker 1: just before we got married and my husband was like,

1134
00:58:46,200 --> 00:58:48,720
Speaker 1: I am worried that you're gonna that you're gonna like

1135
00:58:48,800 --> 00:58:51,280
Speaker 1: have children and split because like I have some weird

1136
00:58:51,320 --> 00:58:53,240
Speaker 1: family history and stuff. And he was like, I'm worried

1137
00:58:53,240 --> 00:58:55,680
Speaker 1: that that's just like in your jeans maybe, And I

1138
00:58:55,760 --> 00:58:59,880
Speaker 1: was like, I don't think it is, but I also don't,

1139
00:59:00,520 --> 00:59:02,640
Speaker 1: but I don't think so. I think it's okay. And

1140
00:59:02,680 --> 00:59:05,200
Speaker 1: I do think that if you're in a supportive relationship,

1141
00:59:05,200 --> 00:59:08,600
Speaker 1: it's okay to like give voice to irrational fear once

1142
00:59:08,600 --> 00:59:11,080
Speaker 1: in a while, and it's not it shouldn't be scary

1143
00:59:11,160 --> 00:59:13,520
Speaker 1: for the other person because you do have to be

1144
00:59:14,120 --> 00:59:16,440
Speaker 1: true to yourself. I think if you're like living in

1145
00:59:16,480 --> 00:59:19,840
Speaker 1: that place all the time, then that's a different matter entirely.

1146
00:59:19,920 --> 00:59:22,560
Speaker 1: But having a healthy dialogue with yourself is very important.

1147
00:59:22,920 --> 00:59:26,840
Speaker 1: As Chelsea is saying, I think that's really really great advice. Yeah,

1148
00:59:26,920 --> 00:59:28,720
Speaker 1: And I like what you're saying, you know, you that's

1149
00:59:28,720 --> 00:59:31,320
Speaker 1: good advice, also talking about it voicing your fear. I

1150
00:59:31,360 --> 00:59:33,320
Speaker 1: remember my girlfriend was going through a rough patch with

1151
00:59:33,320 --> 00:59:36,840
Speaker 1: her boyfriend and she he he wanted a child and

1152
00:59:36,920 --> 00:59:39,280
Speaker 1: she did it and that's why we're friends. She goes,

1153
00:59:39,360 --> 00:59:41,080
Speaker 1: is it a deal breaker? But they've been together for

1154
00:59:41,120 --> 00:59:43,720
Speaker 1: three or four years already, and he was like, I

1155
00:59:43,760 --> 00:59:45,959
Speaker 1: don't know. I have to think about it. I didn't

1156
00:59:46,000 --> 00:59:48,320
Speaker 1: realize this was so important to me. And she's like, well,

1157
00:59:48,360 --> 00:59:50,200
Speaker 1: I need I need an answer. You need to tell me.

1158
00:59:50,280 --> 00:59:52,120
Speaker 1: She's like, you have six weeks to figure it out,

1159
00:59:52,400 --> 00:59:54,360
Speaker 1: and I was like, no, no, you cannot give someone

1160
00:59:54,440 --> 00:59:56,680
Speaker 1: six weeks to figure this out. Like when you put

1161
00:59:56,800 --> 00:59:59,120
Speaker 1: when you need a definitive answer on something, you're giving

1162
00:59:59,200 --> 01:00:02,200
Speaker 1: something no, no space to breathe. You're not giving any

1163
01:00:02,360 --> 01:00:05,240
Speaker 1: room for it to be okay. You know, because you

1164
01:00:05,320 --> 01:00:08,120
Speaker 1: can't control the outcome. You can never control the outcome.

1165
01:00:08,160 --> 01:00:10,320
Speaker 1: All you can control is how you conduct yourself and

1166
01:00:10,360 --> 01:00:13,160
Speaker 1: your response to things. So I would definitely bring it

1167
01:00:13,200 --> 01:00:15,240
Speaker 1: up with your partner. I'm sure him he'll probably say

1168
01:00:15,280 --> 01:00:17,560
Speaker 1: something to you that will make you feel better and

1169
01:00:17,640 --> 01:00:19,800
Speaker 1: better I mean, that will make you feel better about

1170
01:00:19,800 --> 01:00:23,160
Speaker 1: the situation. But beyond that, it's your job to not

1171
01:00:23,240 --> 01:00:26,560
Speaker 1: look to him to make you feel better all the time.

1172
01:00:27,000 --> 01:00:28,919
Speaker 1: You know it's something you can bring up, but it's

1173
01:00:28,920 --> 01:00:31,800
Speaker 1: not a burden for you to place on him, because

1174
01:00:31,840 --> 01:00:35,160
Speaker 1: it's an inside conversation that you're having with yourself and

1175
01:00:35,200 --> 01:00:37,480
Speaker 1: that needs to get stronger. Your sense of self needs

1176
01:00:37,520 --> 01:00:40,520
Speaker 1: to get stronger. So hopefully you will be able to

1177
01:00:40,560 --> 01:00:43,640
Speaker 1: have more open conversations because you know, nobody wants their

1178
01:00:43,640 --> 01:00:45,960
Speaker 1: partner to feel like that. Who wants to see their

1179
01:00:46,000 --> 01:00:49,120
Speaker 1: partner suffering like that or worried? Yeah, when you're two

1180
01:00:49,200 --> 01:00:51,560
Speaker 1: years into a relationship, you don't have to pretend that

1181
01:00:51,600 --> 01:00:54,720
Speaker 1: you love boxing or whatever it is, like whatever their

1182
01:00:54,760 --> 01:00:57,160
Speaker 1: hobby is that you really can't stand, but you think

1183
01:00:57,200 --> 01:00:59,520
Speaker 1: that you like. You pretend to like it so much

1184
01:00:59,560 --> 01:01:01,040
Speaker 1: that you actual really think that you like it, and

1185
01:01:01,080 --> 01:01:03,160
Speaker 1: then the moment that your relationship is over, you're like, oh,

1186
01:01:03,200 --> 01:01:05,960
Speaker 1: I funking really hated that. Actually that wasn't really fun

1187
01:01:06,000 --> 01:01:10,040
Speaker 1: at all. But like, you're so deep into the relationship

1188
01:01:10,120 --> 01:01:13,520
Speaker 1: now you should be able to like be your true self,

1189
01:01:14,120 --> 01:01:17,440
Speaker 1: and part of that is allowing letting that person know

1190
01:01:17,520 --> 01:01:20,280
Speaker 1: that you're going to like that. You're also trying to

1191
01:01:20,320 --> 01:01:23,200
Speaker 1: create a better dialogue inside yourself and that you're aware

1192
01:01:23,720 --> 01:01:26,360
Speaker 1: that it might seem irrational, but it's okay to say

1193
01:01:26,360 --> 01:01:30,200
Speaker 1: it out loud occasionally sometimes when I this something that

1194
01:01:30,320 --> 01:01:32,640
Speaker 1: I do, if I you know, sometimes like in this

1195
01:01:32,680 --> 01:01:34,800
Speaker 1: business and this is so weird, but I am going

1196
01:01:34,840 --> 01:01:37,160
Speaker 1: to say it. You know, you're like you're always reading

1197
01:01:37,160 --> 01:01:40,280
Speaker 1: stories about like opportunities all around you, and everybody's like,

1198
01:01:40,400 --> 01:01:43,520
Speaker 1: what's he getting, what's she doing? What's this? Like? You sold? What?

1199
01:01:43,800 --> 01:01:47,400
Speaker 1: Oh my god? And you get jealous. You get you

1200
01:01:47,440 --> 01:01:50,480
Speaker 1: have like these eruptions of jealousy and even though you're

1201
01:01:50,520 --> 01:01:53,200
Speaker 1: doing really well and this seems so crazy, like why

1202
01:01:53,200 --> 01:01:55,200
Speaker 1: would you be jealous? Why would you be thinking about

1203
01:01:55,240 --> 01:01:58,360
Speaker 1: opportunities that someone else is getting? Like how is that

1204
01:01:58,600 --> 01:02:02,000
Speaker 1: relevant to you? But it happened in erupts and I

1205
01:02:02,080 --> 01:02:04,760
Speaker 1: personally like to give it a voice. I like, we'll

1206
01:02:05,040 --> 01:02:06,920
Speaker 1: take my husband and I'll go, oh, I feel so

1207
01:02:07,000 --> 01:02:10,240
Speaker 1: jealous today and here's why. And he's like, oh my god,

1208
01:02:10,240 --> 01:02:11,680
Speaker 1: what is wrong with you? And I'm like, I have

1209
01:02:11,800 --> 01:02:14,000
Speaker 1: to just say it out loud in order for me

1210
01:02:14,040 --> 01:02:17,880
Speaker 1: to disperse it. The more I hold it, the more

1211
01:02:17,960 --> 01:02:21,240
Speaker 1: real it gets, And that's very unhealthy. Sometimes I need

1212
01:02:21,280 --> 01:02:23,280
Speaker 1: to say it out loud because I need to hear

1213
01:02:23,320 --> 01:02:27,520
Speaker 1: what it sounds like in real life. And the moment

1214
01:02:27,560 --> 01:02:30,840
Speaker 1: I hear myself say it, I go, oh, okay, and

1215
01:02:30,880 --> 01:02:33,400
Speaker 1: it's just like he races. So I don't know if

1216
01:02:33,440 --> 01:02:36,320
Speaker 1: that's I like that. I like that, especially with somebody

1217
01:02:36,320 --> 01:02:38,920
Speaker 1: that you can trust. I remember once telling my sister

1218
01:02:39,040 --> 01:02:41,680
Speaker 1: years ago a friend of mine got a huge opportunity

1219
01:02:41,680 --> 01:02:43,520
Speaker 1: and I was the one who had, you know, brought

1220
01:02:43,560 --> 01:02:45,720
Speaker 1: her into stand up and introduced her to stand up

1221
01:02:45,720 --> 01:02:47,480
Speaker 1: and encourage her to do it. And then she got

1222
01:02:47,480 --> 01:02:49,840
Speaker 1: a big break before I did, and I had all

1223
01:02:49,880 --> 01:02:52,920
Speaker 1: these feelings of envy and jealousy. And I was in

1224
01:02:52,960 --> 01:02:55,200
Speaker 1: my twenties, and I called my sister and I told her,

1225
01:02:55,240 --> 01:02:57,760
Speaker 1: I go, I feel so terrible. I'm so jealous. But

1226
01:02:57,840 --> 01:02:59,920
Speaker 1: she's my friend and and she's like, it's how to

1227
01:03:00,000 --> 01:03:03,280
Speaker 1: really fine? She's like, just tell something. You tell me,

1228
01:03:03,400 --> 01:03:05,479
Speaker 1: that's okay. Just don't As long as you don't act

1229
01:03:05,520 --> 01:03:08,680
Speaker 1: on the jealousy, you're almost expunging it by giving it

1230
01:03:08,760 --> 01:03:11,280
Speaker 1: a voice. And I think that's great to remember. You know,

1231
01:03:11,600 --> 01:03:13,560
Speaker 1: you have somebody in your life that you can trust

1232
01:03:13,600 --> 01:03:16,040
Speaker 1: and always confide in, and that should be your person

1233
01:03:16,400 --> 01:03:18,760
Speaker 1: that you can say the things that you're embarrassed to say,

1234
01:03:18,760 --> 01:03:20,600
Speaker 1: and sometimes when you do, hear them out loud. Just

1235
01:03:20,640 --> 01:03:25,200
Speaker 1: like Samantha just said, You're like, Okay, anything I'm operating on,

1236
01:03:25,320 --> 01:03:28,280
Speaker 1: You're like, that's just too stupid. I was holding on

1237
01:03:28,320 --> 01:03:32,200
Speaker 1: to that for too long. Okay, let's move forward. Yeah,

1238
01:03:32,680 --> 01:03:36,440
Speaker 1: give yourself the room to be vulnerable. Right, Well, we'll

1239
01:03:36,480 --> 01:03:39,560
Speaker 1: take a quick break and we'll be back to wrap

1240
01:03:39,720 --> 01:03:51,080
Speaker 1: up with Samantha B and Chelsea. Okay, and we're back. Great, Okay,

1241
01:03:51,160 --> 01:03:57,480
Speaker 1: this is fun. Yeah, good advice giving Samantha awesome high stakes.

1242
01:03:57,640 --> 01:04:00,480
Speaker 1: I love it. These are real, these are real lives.

1243
01:04:00,480 --> 01:04:05,720
Speaker 1: These are like very relatable issues, very relatable. Well, speaking

1244
01:04:05,720 --> 01:04:09,120
Speaker 1: of relatable issues, sam do you have any advice you'd

1245
01:04:09,160 --> 01:04:12,560
Speaker 1: like to ask from Chelsea? Here's a question and this

1246
01:04:12,680 --> 01:04:15,880
Speaker 1: is like, okay, okay, this isn't going to sound like

1247
01:04:15,920 --> 01:04:20,080
Speaker 1: anyone who knows me and anyone who works with me

1248
01:04:20,160 --> 01:04:23,760
Speaker 1: will think that this question is insane because it's very

1249
01:04:23,840 --> 01:04:27,720
Speaker 1: unlike me. I don't. You're very open about drug use,

1250
01:04:28,320 --> 01:04:31,640
Speaker 1: very open about drug use, very open about all of that, pharmaceuticals,

1251
01:04:31,680 --> 01:04:34,880
Speaker 1: all of that, and no one ever offers me drugs

1252
01:04:34,880 --> 01:04:36,760
Speaker 1: of any kind and I don't know what it is

1253
01:04:36,800 --> 01:04:41,240
Speaker 1: about me obviously like such a nerd and it's because

1254
01:04:41,240 --> 01:04:46,320
Speaker 1: you're from look, Canada. Whatever one thing that I would

1255
01:04:46,480 --> 01:04:51,080
Speaker 1: like to try after watching the whole documentary about fungi

1256
01:04:51,120 --> 01:04:54,600
Speaker 1: on Netflix, which I loved, and I was like this,

1257
01:04:55,360 --> 01:04:59,160
Speaker 1: I feel like that documentary about fungi, like fantastic Fungi

1258
01:05:00,200 --> 01:05:03,560
Speaker 1: was so was almost like a spiritual experience for me

1259
01:05:03,600 --> 01:05:07,080
Speaker 1: watching that. Should I try magic mushrooms? I think you

1260
01:05:07,160 --> 01:05:11,120
Speaker 1: have to because it is so, because it's so I

1261
01:05:11,160 --> 01:05:13,720
Speaker 1: took yesterday. I take a little chocolate square of magic

1262
01:05:13,800 --> 01:05:17,760
Speaker 1: mushrooms almost every day, almost every day. I haven't taken

1263
01:05:17,760 --> 01:05:19,680
Speaker 1: it today. I wish I had now that we're talking

1264
01:05:19,680 --> 01:05:22,200
Speaker 1: about it, so I could just But there is there

1265
01:05:22,320 --> 01:05:26,000
Speaker 1: is a mental clarity that you can reach. You don't

1266
01:05:26,000 --> 01:05:29,000
Speaker 1: have to go bonkers and go dose yourself. But right

1267
01:05:29,000 --> 01:05:32,280
Speaker 1: now there's so many in Canada. Everyone has mushrooms, they

1268
01:05:32,280 --> 01:05:36,560
Speaker 1: have micro dose fifty milligrams, it's whatever you want. I

1269
01:05:36,600 --> 01:05:38,560
Speaker 1: like it in chocolate because I just gives me a

1270
01:05:38,600 --> 01:05:41,520
Speaker 1: better like upper. But there is a mental clarity that

1271
01:05:41,680 --> 01:05:46,160
Speaker 1: isn't naturally available to me. It is an upper in

1272
01:05:46,200 --> 01:05:49,240
Speaker 1: a way where you don't feel like you're on a drug,

1273
01:05:49,600 --> 01:05:51,440
Speaker 1: you know, like mushrooms. If you take silicide and you

1274
01:05:51,480 --> 01:05:53,280
Speaker 1: want to do a proper dose or you want to

1275
01:05:53,360 --> 01:05:56,480
Speaker 1: do a guided you know dose for healing purposes, that's

1276
01:05:56,480 --> 01:05:58,840
Speaker 1: a different situation, and I would encourage that for people

1277
01:05:58,840 --> 01:06:00,920
Speaker 1: who are dealing with trauma anything that they want to,

1278
01:06:01,000 --> 01:06:02,960
Speaker 1: you know, kind of tackle. But I think there is

1279
01:06:03,040 --> 01:06:06,320
Speaker 1: really nothing to lose. You kind of just see everything

1280
01:06:06,400 --> 01:06:09,160
Speaker 1: from a little bit more. It taps into a part

1281
01:06:09,200 --> 01:06:11,160
Speaker 1: of your brain where you are able to be up,

1282
01:06:11,600 --> 01:06:14,880
Speaker 1: you're clear minded, you're not you know, off your rocker,

1283
01:06:15,160 --> 01:06:19,440
Speaker 1: and you're able to be productive and sound. So it

1284
01:06:19,560 --> 01:06:22,640
Speaker 1: kind of adds to whatever you've already got going on naturally.

1285
01:06:22,960 --> 01:06:25,920
Speaker 1: Do you think that because I've never done them before,

1286
01:06:26,400 --> 01:06:28,480
Speaker 1: that I'll have a really because I've had like I've

1287
01:06:28,520 --> 01:06:30,800
Speaker 1: taken I've taken up in the past and had such

1288
01:06:30,880 --> 01:06:34,120
Speaker 1: bad experiences, do you think that I would be at

1289
01:06:34,280 --> 01:06:36,560
Speaker 1: risk for having a really bad experience just from the

1290
01:06:36,680 --> 01:06:39,440
Speaker 1: stress of like just from being kind of tense about

1291
01:06:39,440 --> 01:06:42,800
Speaker 1: it but really wanting but really I feel like it

1292
01:06:42,880 --> 01:06:46,000
Speaker 1: could be really beneficial to me, but I'm also terrified, Like,

1293
01:06:46,080 --> 01:06:48,240
Speaker 1: do you think that the terror will cause me to

1294
01:06:48,280 --> 01:06:50,680
Speaker 1: have a bad experience. I honestly think if you have

1295
01:06:50,760 --> 01:06:52,439
Speaker 1: that kind of fear, you should just have the most

1296
01:06:52,520 --> 01:06:55,640
Speaker 1: minimal possible amount you can have, like a half of

1297
01:06:55,640 --> 01:06:58,680
Speaker 1: a micro dose to allay your fear, because once you

1298
01:06:58,720 --> 01:07:00,840
Speaker 1: do that, you're gonna understand I'm not going to be

1299
01:07:00,920 --> 01:07:03,720
Speaker 1: overwhelmed by this, and then your fear will abate, and

1300
01:07:03,760 --> 01:07:07,160
Speaker 1: then by the time it does, you can introduce whatever

1301
01:07:07,560 --> 01:07:11,400
Speaker 1: minuscule amount and it's almost an imperceptible feeling when it's

1302
01:07:11,400 --> 01:07:14,040
Speaker 1: done right. When you don't have too much, like fifty

1303
01:07:14,080 --> 01:07:17,640
Speaker 1: milligrams of psilocybin is not going to affect you in

1304
01:07:17,600 --> 01:07:20,360
Speaker 1: any deleterious. You're not gonna lose it, You're not gonna

1305
01:07:20,360 --> 01:07:23,400
Speaker 1: get overwhelmed. You're just gonna have a little bit of

1306
01:07:23,480 --> 01:07:27,360
Speaker 1: a feeling of like, oh, oh, everything is brighter and

1307
01:07:27,480 --> 01:07:31,000
Speaker 1: clearer and I am my mind is clear. And it

1308
01:07:31,120 --> 01:07:33,880
Speaker 1: adds to whatever you're already working with. You know, on

1309
01:07:33,880 --> 01:07:36,959
Speaker 1: on a brain mechanical level, and there are so many

1310
01:07:37,000 --> 01:07:39,320
Speaker 1: parts of our brain that we're not accessing, and when

1311
01:07:39,360 --> 01:07:42,720
Speaker 1: you do something like that, you are accessing a part

1312
01:07:42,720 --> 01:07:45,120
Speaker 1: of your brain and you feel it. You're like, oh gosh,

1313
01:07:45,360 --> 01:07:47,480
Speaker 1: so I just yeah, the fear is definitely something to

1314
01:07:47,520 --> 01:07:50,240
Speaker 1: be considered, but you just even take it easier because

1315
01:07:50,240 --> 01:07:51,880
Speaker 1: you just have to remember, this isn't a drug. You're

1316
01:07:51,880 --> 01:07:53,520
Speaker 1: not trying to get sucked up. You're just you're just

1317
01:07:53,560 --> 01:07:56,919
Speaker 1: trying to like enhance. It's an enhancer. We talked about

1318
01:07:56,960 --> 01:07:58,880
Speaker 1: it at dinner last night, and we're talking to just

1319
01:07:58,920 --> 01:08:02,080
Speaker 1: about the efects of it and how people don't understand

1320
01:08:02,160 --> 01:08:06,480
Speaker 1: how it enhances almost every experience, a work experience, a

1321
01:08:06,560 --> 01:08:10,640
Speaker 1: play experience, or even a family experience. Oh great, because

1322
01:08:10,640 --> 01:08:13,440
Speaker 1: I don't, like I'm not up for seeing like elves

1323
01:08:13,560 --> 01:08:17,519
Speaker 1: running under the sofa, Like I don't not really, that's

1324
01:08:17,520 --> 01:08:19,599
Speaker 1: how the experience I'm looking for. It was just like

1325
01:08:19,840 --> 01:08:24,639
Speaker 1: what does this mean? Like what could this unlock inside? Yes,

1326
01:08:24,760 --> 01:08:28,040
Speaker 1: that's a great way to look at it. Yeah, like

1327
01:08:28,200 --> 01:08:30,240
Speaker 1: is that is that a possibility? And how long will

1328
01:08:30,240 --> 01:08:31,960
Speaker 1: it last? And will I be normal in front of

1329
01:08:31,960 --> 01:08:35,599
Speaker 1: my children? So maybe I'll do it like by myself. Yeah,

1330
01:08:35,600 --> 01:08:37,840
Speaker 1: it doesn't last forever, don't worry. It's like a couple

1331
01:08:37,840 --> 01:08:40,960
Speaker 1: of hours maybe, And you know, and again, it's not

1332
01:08:41,040 --> 01:08:43,120
Speaker 1: like you're going to have to be like tripping in

1333
01:08:43,160 --> 01:08:45,800
Speaker 1: a room in the dark, like it's not like that.

1334
01:08:45,840 --> 01:08:47,599
Speaker 1: You just go about your business like you would any

1335
01:08:47,600 --> 01:08:49,800
Speaker 1: other day. You know, try it on a day where

1336
01:08:49,800 --> 01:08:51,479
Speaker 1: you don't have to do a lot, so that you're

1337
01:08:51,520 --> 01:08:54,360
Speaker 1: not like worried about that. But just to create the

1338
01:08:54,400 --> 01:08:56,880
Speaker 1: confidence in your psyche that you're okay and you're not

1339
01:08:56,880 --> 01:08:59,200
Speaker 1: going to freak out. Is to do it as minimally

1340
01:08:59,240 --> 01:09:02,240
Speaker 1: as possible and so that you could kind of understand

1341
01:09:02,240 --> 01:09:05,320
Speaker 1: it better. I love this. This is good advice. Okay,

1342
01:09:05,479 --> 01:09:08,600
Speaker 1: I needed to talk that through. Okay, Like, talk to

1343
01:09:08,640 --> 01:09:11,200
Speaker 1: me next week when I'm like playing the mandolin at

1344
01:09:11,240 --> 01:09:13,640
Speaker 1: a renaissance fair. I'm like, I gave it all up.

1345
01:09:13,880 --> 01:09:19,160
Speaker 1: I'll probably just mail you some magic mushrooms from from

1346
01:09:19,200 --> 01:09:21,760
Speaker 1: some other name to another name, but they'll get to

1347
01:09:21,800 --> 01:09:24,240
Speaker 1: you somehow. We'll make you. We'll find our way, just

1348
01:09:24,280 --> 01:09:27,120
Speaker 1: like a Magellan. Okay, you calmed me down. I really do.

1349
01:09:27,160 --> 01:09:29,000
Speaker 1: I think it would be so. I feel like it

1350
01:09:29,080 --> 01:09:30,960
Speaker 1: would be good for me because I am like pretty

1351
01:09:31,000 --> 01:09:33,160
Speaker 1: uptight and kind of a control freak in my own home,

1352
01:09:33,240 --> 01:09:37,519
Speaker 1: like and walking around sorting laundry. It's boring. I would

1353
01:09:37,560 --> 01:09:39,880
Speaker 1: like to try a new version of myself in a

1354
01:09:39,920 --> 01:09:42,479
Speaker 1: minor way. It would be nice to let go a

1355
01:09:42,520 --> 01:09:45,680
Speaker 1: little awesome. I'm a love drug question. So yeah, and

1356
01:09:45,760 --> 01:09:48,400
Speaker 1: plus every by the way, everyone is doing it, you

1357
01:09:48,400 --> 01:09:51,040
Speaker 1: know what I mean, and everyone's loving it like it's

1358
01:09:51,080 --> 01:09:55,120
Speaker 1: getting rave reviews. So this is the moment. This is

1359
01:09:55,120 --> 01:09:58,679
Speaker 1: my time. So Chelsea, one question about that. I am

1360
01:09:58,720 --> 01:10:01,439
Speaker 1: also a person who has never done magic mushrooms, but

1361
01:10:01,560 --> 01:10:04,679
Speaker 1: people often recommend doing them in nature. Do you think,

1362
01:10:04,800 --> 01:10:07,240
Speaker 1: like even from microdos, would you say, like head out

1363
01:10:07,439 --> 01:10:11,439
Speaker 1: doors or do you always Okay, yeah, I mean you know,

1364
01:10:11,560 --> 01:10:13,880
Speaker 1: I I could do it inside too, but like, no,

1365
01:10:14,120 --> 01:10:17,599
Speaker 1: it enhances everything and the colors of the leaves on

1366
01:10:17,640 --> 01:10:20,439
Speaker 1: the trees, the nature that you're seeing. Yeah, it enhance.

1367
01:10:20,479 --> 01:10:24,439
Speaker 1: It's just an enhance her. So to understand it better

1368
01:10:24,640 --> 01:10:26,519
Speaker 1: is to be in nature, you know, because then you

1369
01:10:26,560 --> 01:10:28,960
Speaker 1: really have a connection and you realize like, oh, okay,

1370
01:10:29,040 --> 01:10:33,400
Speaker 1: this is this is you understand how kind of small

1371
01:10:33,520 --> 01:10:35,800
Speaker 1: you are and how amazing everything is. Like that we're

1372
01:10:35,840 --> 01:10:38,760
Speaker 1: all sitting here, you know, functioning. It's just kind of

1373
01:10:38,800 --> 01:10:40,880
Speaker 1: like it's got that vibe to it too, where you're

1374
01:10:40,920 --> 01:10:43,720
Speaker 1: just really happy and grateful that you get to be

1375
01:10:43,800 --> 01:10:47,880
Speaker 1: like here doing your thing. I love this. Okay, all right,

1376
01:10:48,040 --> 01:10:54,200
Speaker 1: that's great, that's cool. Well, Sam will do mushrooms together. Okay, okay, perfect, awesome,

1377
01:10:54,320 --> 01:10:57,519
Speaker 1: Well where can everyone find you? She's going to be

1378
01:10:57,479 --> 01:11:00,280
Speaker 1: in the wood doing mushrooms with her podcast. Full East

1379
01:11:00,320 --> 01:11:03,040
Speaker 1: is the podcast I'm going to be a guest on

1380
01:11:03,280 --> 01:11:05,640
Speaker 1: as well, probably the very same week that you're a

1381
01:11:05,640 --> 01:11:08,519
Speaker 1: guest on mine. We released on Tuesdays. When when do

1382
01:11:08,560 --> 01:11:13,120
Speaker 1: you release? Release on Thursdays? Thursday's Tuesday, Thursday. We do

1383
01:11:13,160 --> 01:11:17,760
Speaker 1: a full release on Thursday, and then Full Frontal with

1384
01:11:17,800 --> 01:11:20,880
Speaker 1: Samantha b is in its seventh season yep, Thursdays at

1385
01:11:20,920 --> 01:11:24,040
Speaker 1: seven pm on TBS. Oh god, thank you so much, Samantha.

1386
01:11:24,040 --> 01:11:25,800
Speaker 1: I had a wonderful morning with you. I mean, we've

1387
01:11:25,840 --> 01:11:28,479
Speaker 1: spent more time together probably that I've spent with anyone

1388
01:11:28,479 --> 01:11:31,200
Speaker 1: other than my boyfriend this year, and we just met,

1389
01:11:31,400 --> 01:11:34,240
Speaker 1: so we're off to a really great start. I loved it.

1390
01:11:34,320 --> 01:11:36,519
Speaker 1: Thank you so much for talking me through this and

1391
01:11:36,560 --> 01:11:38,479
Speaker 1: for oh my god for bringing me on. That was

1392
01:11:38,520 --> 01:11:42,400
Speaker 1: like emotional. I know it can get emotional. Yeah, I

1393
01:11:42,439 --> 01:11:44,799
Speaker 1: loved it. I want all the people who ask questions

1394
01:11:45,040 --> 01:11:48,720
Speaker 1: to take your advice and run with it anyway. Thank

1395
01:11:48,760 --> 01:11:50,679
Speaker 1: you so much. It was great to have a great

1396
01:11:50,720 --> 01:11:54,360
Speaker 1: day you too. Bye bye. Bye, And if you'd like

1397
01:11:54,439 --> 01:11:57,080
Speaker 1: to get advice from Chelsea and one of her guests,

1398
01:11:57,280 --> 01:12:02,920
Speaker 1: please write into Dear Chelsea Project at gmail dot com.