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Speaker 1: Okay, salute, salute.

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Speaker 2: Ah.

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Speaker 3: Hi, I am Freddie Rodriguez and I'm Wilmer Valdoroma.

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Speaker 2: We are in the Dose Amigos podcast.

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Speaker 1: Well, thank you so much for everyone who's been prescribing

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Speaker 1: and downloading.

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Speaker 3: It's so amazing that you'll have been looking for us

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Speaker 3: everywhere else that we are available and and.

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Speaker 1: Just enjoying these conversations.

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Speaker 3: You know, the idea of this podcast was to kind

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Speaker 3: of come together, reflect look ahead, but also be present

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Speaker 3: and enjoying and enjoying our friendship and the life that

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Speaker 3: we've lived, you know, in the legacy we're leaving behind.

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Speaker 3: And I think in this episode, you know, we wanted

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Speaker 3: to kind of domestify, you know, some of these things

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Speaker 3: you know that you know, multi generation that we've been

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Speaker 3: passed down, you know, I know mental health oth is

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Speaker 3: a is a big subject, you know, something that a

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Speaker 3: lot of people, you know struggle with today and and

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Speaker 3: you know, perhaps some of our listeners in this very

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Speaker 3: moment are going through a really difficult time. So we

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Speaker 3: thought it'd be cool to just say, hey, you know,

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Speaker 3: let's reflect on some of the things that we do

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Speaker 3: for ourselves. You know, some of the things that you

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Speaker 3: know that has gotten us through the darkness. You know,

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Speaker 3: our jobs, this career could be so so you know,

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Speaker 3: so tough, you know, rejection and the negativity that can

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Speaker 3: be surrounded by you know, it could be not just scary,

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Speaker 3: but could also really be.

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Speaker 1: Daunting.

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Speaker 3: It's hard to find the path, you know, when you're

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Speaker 3: when you're when you enter in these zones, and how

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Speaker 3: do you keep yourself yourself saying how do you keep

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Speaker 3: priority as the guide in light? And you know, how

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Speaker 3: do you protect yourself in all these ways? And we had.

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Speaker 1: To do things right.

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Speaker 3: We had to kind of figure out what are these

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Speaker 3: things that you treat you know yourself to you know,

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Speaker 3: and you know, I'll start with you know my version, right.

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Speaker 1: I started this thing called my hour.

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Speaker 3: A day that if if in twenty four hours you

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Speaker 3: didn't have one hour for yourself, then what.

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Speaker 1: Did you do for yourself today?

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Speaker 2: Right?

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Speaker 1: In other words, like.

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Speaker 3: Today match tomorrow or didn't match yesterday? Like how do

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Speaker 3: you you know, how did what did tuesday? What was

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Speaker 3: Tuesday different than Wednesday? And it's in that hour sometimes

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Speaker 3: when when our daily routine is going to work, you know,

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Speaker 3: getting on the same freeway, you know, making those similar

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Speaker 3: phone calls and then getting home and having a version

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Speaker 3: of the dinner we had before.

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Speaker 1: You know what about that day made you remember it?

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Speaker 3: You know, in that hour that I would afford myself

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Speaker 3: could be in the form of fitness, right which I

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Speaker 3: like to work out, listen to loud meal say, can

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Speaker 3: really get in the mood and like you know, and

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Speaker 3: sing out loud, and you know, it could be a swim,

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Speaker 3: it could be a walk, It could be a meditation.

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Speaker 1: It could be reading a chapter of your favorite book.

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Speaker 1: You know. It could be you know, watching an episode

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Speaker 1: of something you know.

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Speaker 3: And I think that the idea was that my hour

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Speaker 3: day kind of inspire us all to kind of take charge,

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Speaker 3: you know, and break the patterns of our daily lives,

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Speaker 3: you know.

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Speaker 1: And and find that.

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Speaker 3: But do you have something like that? Do you have

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Speaker 3: something like a you know, like my hour day? But

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Speaker 3: you know what, what do you what do you do

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Speaker 3: for yourself when it comes to like I want to

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Speaker 3: recenter again, I want to recharge.

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Speaker 2: Yeah.

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Speaker 4: A couple of years ago I went and I took

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Speaker 4: an intensive it's called TM Transcendental Meditation course, and it

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Speaker 4: was it was a three day course where they teach

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Speaker 4: you how to meditate. They give you a mantra, you know,

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Speaker 4: and it really helped me in so many different ways.

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Speaker 4: It helped me get centered. You know, I think it's

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Speaker 4: really normal in our industry for us to get anxious, right,

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Speaker 4: you know, for anxiety to be so prevalent in our

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Speaker 4: industry and in life, right, that's you know, obviously.

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Speaker 2: A byproduct of stress. Right.

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Speaker 4: And so I learned how to do that and it

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Speaker 4: and it also helped me in my in my acting

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Speaker 4: as well. You know, I find I remember one time,

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Speaker 4: I think we said this in the other episode, Andy

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Speaker 4: Garcia gave me some good advice.

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Speaker 2: He said, he said, just stay loose, man, stay loose.

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Speaker 4: Sometimes it's hard to stay loose, you know, when you're

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Speaker 4: when you're tense, when you're stressed, stakes are high, stakes

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Speaker 4: are high. Right, you don't know if other people on

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Speaker 4: set are disturbing your peace. You know, there's a multitude

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Speaker 4: of different elements that could affect that. And thus I

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Speaker 4: feel could affect your performance, you know. And I found

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Speaker 4: that meditation really helped me get centered, uh and help

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Speaker 4: me get focused enough that if any of that tried

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Speaker 4: to come into my space, I had the tools to

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Speaker 4: be able to deflect from that.

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Speaker 2: Uh. And and that and even in my regular life,

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Speaker 2: you know, just whatever stresses.

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Speaker 4: Or anxieties we're going through it, just a little bit

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Speaker 4: of that a few days, a few times a day

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Speaker 4: really helps combat that.

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Speaker 1: So question.

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Speaker 3: So there's so many forms of meditation, and I encourage

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Speaker 3: everyone to find their anthem, right, Like, go out there

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Speaker 3: and find all different versions of meditation and see which

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Speaker 3: one speaks to you, which one centers.

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Speaker 1: You in waste that you never thought you could be before.

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Speaker 1: But for you, what is that?

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Speaker 3: Do you mind talking a little bit about what is

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Speaker 3: the version of meditation you do it?

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Speaker 4: It's twenty minutes, two times a day. Oh, two times

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Speaker 4: a day, two times a day?

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Speaker 2: Yeah?

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Speaker 1: Is there specifically morning and evening?

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Speaker 2: Or I tend to do it?

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Speaker 1: Yeah?

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Speaker 2: Yeah. You know.

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Speaker 4: It's funny because the perception is that if you meditate,

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Speaker 4: it makes you sleepy, but it actually gives you some energy,

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Speaker 4: And so they encourage you to do it early in

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Speaker 4: order for you to take advantage of that energy, right,

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Speaker 4: and for you not to do it like right before

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Speaker 4: bed because they.

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Speaker 2: Think you'd be up.

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Speaker 4: So for me, it's a it's a combination of that

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Speaker 4: some prayer you know in the mornings, ah, some reading,

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Speaker 4: but you know, you have to equip yourself with the

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Speaker 4: tools right in whatever you do, whatever it is, whatever

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Speaker 4: you're dealing with in your life, right, you always need

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Speaker 4: a set of tools.

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Speaker 2: That's that's going to help you get through it, right, buddy.

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Speaker 1: I mean, what's what's the hour a day for me?

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Speaker 2: Yeah?

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Speaker 1: Is it?

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Speaker 2: Is it the same every single day or is it?

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Speaker 3: Well, it depends because I have forfeited my lunch, which

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Speaker 3: used to be my forty five minutes of just like

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Speaker 3: shutting it down. Are either closing my eyes or reading

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Speaker 3: or whatever I have to do. I have to forfeit

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Speaker 3: it to zoom meetings because I have just running out

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Speaker 3: of hours of the day to do all my business stuff.

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Speaker 3: But I will say my hour day starts really early.

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Speaker 3: You know, I'm the guy who gets up at four

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Speaker 3: to thirty in the morning. Wow, I'll be in the

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Speaker 3: gym at four thirty and that gives me actually a

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Speaker 3: good hour and forty five minutes.

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Speaker 2: Even if you get to bed late, you're getting up

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Speaker 2: at four in the morning.

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Speaker 1: I have to do it, Wow, I have to do it.

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Speaker 3: I have to just walk, you know. I walked through

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Speaker 3: the kitchen out through the kitchen door. I stepped down.

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Speaker 3: I walked towards my gym outside in the open. The

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Speaker 3: sky is full of stars, the air is crisp, cold, right,

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Speaker 3: the grass is still icy.

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Speaker 1: You know that.

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Speaker 3: Eventually you make it into you know, the serenity of

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Speaker 3: the night, and then you make it into the gym.

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Speaker 1: You make it into the.

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Speaker 3: Gym, you turn up your music and then you stretch. Yeah,

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Speaker 3: you know, just you and at times, you know, my

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Speaker 3: my my trainer at the time, you know, obviously, you know,

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Speaker 3: come in and four thirty in the morning, I meet

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Speaker 3: me there in the morning.

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Speaker 1: We'll do it, you know.

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Speaker 3: And there'll be times, well I'll just be there by

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Speaker 3: myself four thirty in the morning, just like nothing new.

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Speaker 3: You can hear a sound right that time. Occasionally you

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Speaker 3: cross a couple of coyotes, you know.

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Speaker 1: On your way to the gym.

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Speaker 3: But I walk in there and I will stretch, I

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Speaker 3: will warm up, and then I will just turn the

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Speaker 3: music to something that will make me happy, like I'll

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Speaker 3: do some Mark Anthony songs, so you know, I'll do

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Speaker 3: like some really lively, loud music and then that would

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Speaker 3: put me in that mood and then that that really

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Speaker 3: really would help it.

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Speaker 1: Puld set up this.

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Speaker 3: Tone so then I go from there, you know, take

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Speaker 3: a shower, give him the car, and then traffic didn't

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Speaker 3: bother me, you know. Then I would just go get

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Speaker 3: to the four or five eventually get down to where

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Speaker 3: we shoot, uh in Cis and then and then and

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Speaker 3: then I'd be I had such a running start, you know,

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Speaker 3: a lot of my co stars we just had working

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Speaker 3: up rolling running to.

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Speaker 1: Said are you already already two and a half hours?

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Speaker 1: So up, you know, going? Then I did walk in

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Speaker 1: annoyingly optimistic.

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Speaker 3: You know, are you Are you a breakfast guy or

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Speaker 3: you are you a car I love breakfast. Uh sometimes

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Speaker 3: I've had to do programs where I'm animated fasting, you know,

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Speaker 3: but some for the most part, I'd like to have

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Speaker 3: my breakfast in the morning.

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Speaker 1: If you do it before or after the workout, I

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Speaker 1: do it after.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, you know, I do it after because you know,

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Speaker 3: I like to kind of do a little bit a

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Speaker 3: fast workout.

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Speaker 1: I feel like I'm burning more, you know, I'm reaching

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Speaker 1: from what's in there, you know. And then.

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Speaker 3: You know, and then I'll just have a shake or

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Speaker 3: a world to have a breakfast right away and I

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Speaker 3: get to work, and you know, and I'll just you

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Speaker 3: would have to eat.

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Speaker 1: But then once you once you start your start man,

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Speaker 1: like you know, you.

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Speaker 3: Know how it is once you get to said, you're

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Speaker 3: on the all time and just bringing it, you know,

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Speaker 3: and each scene could be three pages, you know, hard goores,

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Speaker 3: you know. But but that really helps me, you know,

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Speaker 3: just kind of getting a Ronnie Star at it. If

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Speaker 3: I'm traveling somewhere, when I'm in the plane, I'll find

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Speaker 3: a way to just do some You guys can go

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Speaker 3: to any of your streaming music devices and go look

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Speaker 3: for brown noise brown and that it sounds funny because

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Speaker 3: you know you're not brown, but brown noise is like

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Speaker 3: this deep, deep, you know sound.

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Speaker 1: It's like a wide noise.

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Speaker 3: That people used to sleeping sometimes, but the brown noise

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Speaker 3: is so deep. It has like this really really basic

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Speaker 3: kind of you know structure, and as soon as it

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Speaker 3: goes on, it almost feels like the wound of.

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Speaker 1: A mother, you know, and you're just.

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Speaker 3: Sleeping in there, you know, And like that's one way

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Speaker 3: to really turn it off. Once that brown noise explained

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Speaker 3: in your heart and your mind, you're not thinking about

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Speaker 3: anything else, right, nothing outside, nothing inside your your your

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Speaker 3: mind is able to kind of slow it down, you're

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Speaker 3: focusing on the sound, and then at that very moment

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Speaker 3: you're able to let go a little bit. The tense

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Speaker 3: on your shoulders go away, you know, the quick thinking

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Speaker 3: slows down, and that really helps. But brown noise is

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Speaker 3: an interesting one. Else to sleep with brown noise because

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Speaker 3: it's such just so relaxing.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, it's quieting the brain.

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Speaker 1: Do you sleep with that noise maker?

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Speaker 2: I do?

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Speaker 1: Yeah, it's toff.

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Speaker 3: I've been to hotel rooms where I'm like, it's too

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Speaker 3: quiet in here, you know, Yeah.

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Speaker 2: I have to.

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Speaker 4: If you go on youtubeb and you and you put

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Speaker 4: like thunderstorm black screen, there's like twelve hours worth of

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Speaker 4: stuff like that on YouTube.

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Speaker 1: You listen to storms. Yeah, that's that's the thing all night.

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Speaker 2: Yeah.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, but with a black screen, so it's just it's

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Speaker 4: just the sound of the storm in the back.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, but I need something like that.

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Speaker 3: When did you realize that what was that moment? What

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Speaker 3: was that thing? Well, what was that experience that made

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Speaker 3: you think or made you realize that you really needed to.

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Speaker 1: Have this structure of meditation and prayer.

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Speaker 2: I you know, I think that.

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Speaker 4: You know, going through our business, uh and going through

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Speaker 4: the stresses of it. Eventually it starts to get to you.

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Speaker 4: You know, it starts to affect you and affect your

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Speaker 4: mental health. And you know, when you're young and then

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Speaker 4: you're in your twenties, you think you're resilient to everything, right,

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Speaker 4: and then all of a sudden, you start to get

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Speaker 4: older and you start ago, I should probably start doing

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Speaker 4: something about this, uh uh. And then and then you know,

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Speaker 4: I had, you know, my my pop passed away, and

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Speaker 4: you know, had you know, a couple of debts in

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Speaker 4: the family, and that really like rocks you you know,

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Speaker 4: rocks your core.

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Speaker 2: Uh.

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Speaker 4: And then you start to seek out ways to deal

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Speaker 4: with it, you know, especially in our industry, right, it's

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Speaker 4: so it's so easy to turn to other things as

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Speaker 4: opposed to meditation.

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Speaker 2: Or prayer or whatever.

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Speaker 4: You know, it's really easy to start diving into the

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Speaker 4: substance stuff.

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Speaker 2: You know, it's never been my thing, but.

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Speaker 3: Sure, you know, but in our professor and it's it's

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Speaker 3: a you know, it's it's a tough card. You know,

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Speaker 3: being being dealt at that card is is tricky. You know,

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Speaker 3: nobody equips you with this industry. In most careers, you

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Speaker 3: do the work, you show up, you put in your hours,

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Speaker 3: you go home, right, you get paid hourly, you get

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Speaker 3: paid you know, a yearly rate whatever.

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Speaker 1: Whatever that is.

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Speaker 3: But in our profession, and it's it's so much uncertainty.

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Speaker 3: You know, when your next job is going to be,

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Speaker 3: you know, and if a show ends, you know, like

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Speaker 3: you got to get a new one, you're out with

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Speaker 3: that is, you know, and you hope it's something that

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Speaker 3: can hopefully pay the road for the rest of your career,

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Speaker 3: you know.

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Speaker 1: But but it's tough. I mean this, there's some high

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Speaker 1: pressures that comes.

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Speaker 2: With what we do.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, it does a number on your nervous system, you know,

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Speaker 4: and so you have to really start paying attention to

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Speaker 4: those things. And as you get older, you start to

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Speaker 4: realize that. You know, when you're younger, you think you're superman.

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Speaker 4: You know, you don't pay pay attention to any of

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Speaker 4: that stuff, right, But but you know, whether it's that

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Speaker 4: or like even therapy, you know, as we continue this

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Speaker 4: conversation about Latinos and mental health, you know, therapy is

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Speaker 4: something that Latinos and look, and I'm speaking on my

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Speaker 4: own behalf, right, Like, I feel like within our culture

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Speaker 4: is not really something that's at the forefront or.

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Speaker 2: It's talked about or anything like that.

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Speaker 1: No, No, we always put a little dirt on it, you.

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Speaker 4: Know, have a little dirt on it.

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Speaker 3: But before we dive into these multi generational shading of

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Speaker 3: the patterns, I want to acknowledge there are you know,

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Speaker 3: our thro amigo. Here is you know, Josh, Josh in

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Speaker 3: the In the name of you know, having this be

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Speaker 3: our our zen moment, we decided that maybe Josh can

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Speaker 3: help us.

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Speaker 1: With a mocktail.

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Speaker 3: A mocktail, you know, yeah, something that can bring our

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Speaker 3: senses up to a different level.

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Speaker 1: Josh, what do you make for us today? Today?

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Speaker 3: We're going to make a mint, tarragon cucumber, just a

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Speaker 3: refreshing a small water cooler.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, you know, something to kind of get the.

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Speaker 3: Mind right, set the tone that Japanese citrus in there,

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Speaker 3: also sudachi.

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Speaker 1: Just give it a little little tanginess to it. Very good.

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Speaker 1: That sounds great, sounds that wish to meditate that to that.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, you know, we should be in the sauna.

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Speaker 2: Absolutely, that's awesome. Can't wait to taste it. But yeah, man, But.

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Speaker 3: But speaking of multi generational tools, we've never been I

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Speaker 3: don't think I can speak for myself.

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Speaker 1: I don't think we've been ever given.

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Speaker 3: Tools and how to actually cope, how to actually not

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Speaker 3: just cope, but like, how do we how do we process? Yeah,

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Speaker 3: how do we process trauma? How do we how do

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Speaker 3: we endure it? You know, how do we get through it?

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Speaker 3: And then most importantly, how do we set up ourselves

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Speaker 3: for success?

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Speaker 1: You know?

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Speaker 3: Would you agree that that it does something that it's hard?

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Speaker 3: You know in our culture somehow that passed to us somehow.

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Speaker 4: I just I just think that in our culture, we're

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Speaker 4: taught to suppress trauma, suppress feeling, suppress and and keep

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Speaker 4: and keep your head down and keep moving forward. Right,

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Speaker 4: But when you start to learn as you get older,

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Speaker 4: is that you know, it's it's it's like a pressure cooker, right,

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Speaker 4: Like you suppress, you suppress. Eventually, it's gonna have to

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Speaker 4: come out somewhere, right, It's gonna seep through the hole somehow.

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Speaker 1: Right.

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Speaker 3: Oh yeah, wow, Okay, even the collar feels like it

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Speaker 3: took me to a Japanese garden, thank you?

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Speaker 1: Yeah so much? Look at that a salute? Yeah, mint

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Speaker 1: on the top there has mint and tarragon and sudachi,

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Speaker 1: which is a Japanese citrus cucumber inside of there. Like

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Speaker 1: I said, just a small water.

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Speaker 2: Oh my, yeah, but that's delicious.

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Speaker 1: Oh my josh, this is pretty good. It's is damn good.

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Speaker 1: Thank you. Very refreshing.

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Speaker 3: Be getting back up on multi generational inheritance. I have

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Speaker 3: discover myself, my own life, and through my parents. I

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Speaker 3: never saw my dad process a bad day. I never

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Speaker 3: saw my mom complain about what it could have been. Yeah,

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Speaker 3: they just kept looking ahead.

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Speaker 1: They kept driving forward, ignoring the wounds and ignoring.

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Speaker 3: The scars that they had from the sacrifices they undeniably

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Speaker 3: had to make.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, you know that.

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Speaker 3: And you know, specifically for us, who are you know,

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Speaker 3: sons who are very aware of the household and what's

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Speaker 3: happening and what our responsibility would be. You know, it's

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Speaker 3: hard not to be aware of some of the turmoil,

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Speaker 3: some of the pain and some of the stress, you know,

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Speaker 3: some of the trauma that your mom or your dad

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Speaker 3: might be carrying as you become an adult. You know,

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Speaker 3: do you feel like, do you ever saw your parents

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Speaker 3: like taking a bead or one for a walk or

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Speaker 3: like or you know.

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Speaker 2: It was just like absolutely not right.

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Speaker 4: No, you know I think that that are both of

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Speaker 4: our parents came from other places in the United States,

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Speaker 4: and and and their their lives sort of the survival mechanism, right,

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Speaker 4: And that's part of the survival mechanism.

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Speaker 2: It's everything you just said. You just you just.

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Speaker 4: Put your head down and you look forward and all

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Speaker 4: the stuff you just listed, and you survive. You know,

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Speaker 4: you put the blinders on and you survive. However, like

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Speaker 4: I was saying earlier, I feel like eventually you're you're

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Speaker 4: suppressing all the stuff that you're going through, right, all

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Speaker 4: the trauma that you've experienced, and eventually it has to

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Speaker 4: come out someway.

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Speaker 2: Somehow, and what I don't know, what form, I don't know.

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Speaker 4: You know, people sometimes channel that into alcoholism. Sometimes people

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Speaker 4: channel that into drugs.

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Speaker 3: Sometimes sometimes it manifests in projections onto your family and

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Speaker 3: through your kids.

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Speaker 1: You know, your kids bear you.

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Speaker 3: Know, some of that that sadness, that's some of that depression,

398
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Speaker 3: some of that inner you know anger. It's so important

399
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Speaker 3: to you know, for us as we kind of hold

400
00:19:07,760 --> 00:19:12,040
Speaker 3: the baton in this next phase of our generation to

401
00:19:12,160 --> 00:19:16,320
Speaker 3: kind of pass down to the next version of ourselves,

402
00:19:16,840 --> 00:19:19,800
Speaker 3: you know, better tools to figure out that if you're

403
00:19:19,880 --> 00:19:23,720
Speaker 3: going to continue to carry this storch, you know, you

404
00:19:23,800 --> 00:19:26,600
Speaker 3: got to find some outlets. You know, you have to

405
00:19:26,760 --> 00:19:32,640
Speaker 3: let some things go, you know, and look, by all

406
00:19:32,680 --> 00:19:35,960
Speaker 3: means we're not ever advertising here that we're the end masters.

407
00:19:35,960 --> 00:19:39,000
Speaker 3: I mean we have to carry stress we're doing. We're actors, right,

408
00:19:39,080 --> 00:19:42,440
Speaker 3: like actors have to really kind of you know unfortunately,

409
00:19:43,320 --> 00:19:45,560
Speaker 3: you know, good job for job, and you know, even

410
00:19:45,600 --> 00:19:48,320
Speaker 3: though this is our careers and this is what we do,

411
00:19:49,400 --> 00:19:52,000
Speaker 3: their level of inconsistency is not like you get in

412
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Speaker 3: a doctor's office and you can work there for ten years.

413
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Speaker 3: It's just not how it works, right, Like you can

414
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Speaker 3: do a movie this summer, you may not get another

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Speaker 3: one until next winter or the following winter.

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Speaker 1: A year and a half from that winter.

417
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Speaker 3: You know, you get a TV show nobody saw I

418
00:20:07,440 --> 00:20:10,119
Speaker 3: got canceled three episodes in, you know, and like, so

419
00:20:10,240 --> 00:20:13,800
Speaker 3: there's a lot of uncertainty that's distressful. And then you

420
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Speaker 3: become an adult, right, and then you have a family,

421
00:20:17,720 --> 00:20:21,040
Speaker 3: you have kids, but this is what you do, you're

422
00:20:21,080 --> 00:20:23,680
Speaker 3: an actor, and and you know, so and so I

423
00:20:24,320 --> 00:20:27,439
Speaker 3: reflected on that and then I and I flipped the

424
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Speaker 3: coin and said, wow, our parents did what they could,

425
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Speaker 3: and they did what they had to.

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Speaker 1: What would you say to that next generation? What would

427
00:20:37,760 --> 00:20:40,200
Speaker 1: you say to to the next version.

428
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Speaker 3: Of all of us, you know, that says you know,

429
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Speaker 3: all Latinos, you know, you know, when it comes to

430
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Speaker 3: mental health, they just put some.

431
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Speaker 1: Dirt on it, you know, which is what I was

432
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Speaker 1: saying earlier. What would you say to that?

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Speaker 2: I think that it's important to.

434
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Speaker 4: Find what that outlet is, to let out whatever it

435
00:20:59,720 --> 00:21:03,959
Speaker 4: is you're suppressing, right, whatever anger, whatever trauma it is

436
00:21:04,000 --> 00:21:07,440
Speaker 4: you're suppressing, because otherwise it will it will come out.

437
00:21:07,520 --> 00:21:07,679
Speaker 2: You know.

438
00:21:07,760 --> 00:21:10,680
Speaker 4: It's like it's like putting a band aid, right, You're

439
00:21:10,720 --> 00:21:13,600
Speaker 4: going to bleed somewhere, you know, and you don't want

440
00:21:13,600 --> 00:21:16,240
Speaker 4: to be bleeding on your spouse or you know, or

441
00:21:16,359 --> 00:21:20,040
Speaker 4: someone that you really love. And and I feel like

442
00:21:20,080 --> 00:21:23,719
Speaker 4: our culture in particular are not encouraged to do that,

443
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Speaker 4: you know.

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Speaker 2: And I'm not I'm not.

445
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Speaker 4: Sitting here as like an advocate for like therapy for example,

446
00:21:29,359 --> 00:21:31,159
Speaker 4: you know, but like whatever that thing is, you know,

447
00:21:31,320 --> 00:21:32,040
Speaker 4: is it is it?

448
00:21:32,080 --> 00:21:32,720
Speaker 1: Is it prayer?

449
00:21:32,920 --> 00:21:35,120
Speaker 2: Is it meditation? Is it?

450
00:21:35,160 --> 00:21:37,240
Speaker 4: Is it worth waking up at four in the morning

451
00:21:37,400 --> 00:21:40,760
Speaker 4: and putting on brown noise and and working out and

452
00:21:40,840 --> 00:21:44,760
Speaker 4: like whatever that thing is. Because I feel like we're

453
00:21:44,800 --> 00:21:46,080
Speaker 4: not taught that there.

454
00:21:45,960 --> 00:21:48,920
Speaker 2: Should be a thing. It's just put your head down,

455
00:21:49,000 --> 00:21:51,879
Speaker 2: get to work, clock in, clock out, come home, provide

456
00:21:51,920 --> 00:21:54,000
Speaker 2: for your family. You know. It's it's a it's a

457
00:21:54,000 --> 00:21:54,320
Speaker 2: bit of.

458
00:21:54,280 --> 00:21:57,360
Speaker 4: A hamster wheel a little bit right, And I get

459
00:21:57,400 --> 00:21:59,760
Speaker 4: it right, you know, like you said, you get older,

460
00:21:59,760 --> 00:22:01,720
Speaker 4: you have kids, you have a family, You're just trying

461
00:22:01,720 --> 00:22:02,159
Speaker 4: to survive.

462
00:22:02,280 --> 00:22:05,560
Speaker 2: You're just trying to do your things. So I understand. Yeah.

463
00:22:05,600 --> 00:22:08,240
Speaker 1: And it's also you know, this goes beyond our culture too,

464
00:22:08,280 --> 00:22:08,879
Speaker 1: to your point.

465
00:22:09,119 --> 00:22:11,040
Speaker 3: You know, I mean, there's so many cultures out there

466
00:22:11,080 --> 00:22:14,200
Speaker 3: that have had to you know, keep their head down

467
00:22:14,240 --> 00:22:17,040
Speaker 3: and keep digging, you know, and discourse for anyone. It

468
00:22:17,040 --> 00:22:19,480
Speaker 3: doesn't matter if you're white, if you're black, if you're brown,

469
00:22:19,520 --> 00:22:22,639
Speaker 3: if you Asian. You know, it doesn't matter. You know,

470
00:22:22,680 --> 00:22:25,800
Speaker 3: we all carry certain multi generational burdens, you know that

471
00:22:26,080 --> 00:22:28,800
Speaker 3: that we feel we have to kind of continue to carry.

472
00:22:28,960 --> 00:22:31,600
Speaker 3: And that doesn't mean you ever need to forget what

473
00:22:31,880 --> 00:22:34,000
Speaker 3: and who you are and what it took for you

474
00:22:34,080 --> 00:22:37,720
Speaker 3: to become what you are. It just feels like this

475
00:22:37,920 --> 00:22:41,120
Speaker 3: is a moment where you can allow yourself to love

476
00:22:41,160 --> 00:22:44,920
Speaker 3: yourself a little harder than before. Just love yourself a

477
00:22:44,960 --> 00:22:47,399
Speaker 3: little harder, you know, you need to take a nap.

478
00:22:48,359 --> 00:22:52,160
Speaker 1: Take a nap, right right, simple example.

479
00:22:52,160 --> 00:22:53,679
Speaker 3: It's like, if we can make it obtainable and make

480
00:22:53,680 --> 00:22:58,080
Speaker 3: it attainable, you know, and I think about also, you know,

481
00:22:58,160 --> 00:23:01,000
Speaker 3: our ability to pass down to the next generation the

482
00:23:01,040 --> 00:23:04,920
Speaker 3: tools they need to continue to you know, outlive tyranny,

483
00:23:06,520 --> 00:23:10,080
Speaker 3: you know, to continue to move forward and disrupt and

484
00:23:10,080 --> 00:23:11,840
Speaker 3: and build and in order if we're going to go

485
00:23:11,880 --> 00:23:15,760
Speaker 3: and disrupt and build a new you know, a new marketable,

486
00:23:15,920 --> 00:23:19,600
Speaker 3: equitable place for our culture, you know, we're gonna have

487
00:23:19,640 --> 00:23:21,560
Speaker 3: to take care of some things, you know, because we're

488
00:23:21,560 --> 00:23:23,119
Speaker 3: gonna continue to take some hits on the way.

489
00:23:23,200 --> 00:23:26,720
Speaker 1: There. You talk about you know, projection.

490
00:23:26,560 --> 00:23:31,160
Speaker 3: And it's all real, right, and yeah, I mean that's

491
00:23:31,240 --> 00:23:32,879
Speaker 3: that's that's one of those things. I mean, you're in

492
00:23:32,880 --> 00:23:36,280
Speaker 3: this in this subject in this episode. I you know,

493
00:23:36,359 --> 00:23:39,600
Speaker 3: I I think you and I have lived long enough.

494
00:23:40,480 --> 00:23:42,480
Speaker 1: We have so many incredible people.

495
00:23:42,280 --> 00:23:44,760
Speaker 3: In our lives, but we're also lost so many people

496
00:23:44,840 --> 00:23:50,080
Speaker 3: in our lives to depression, to stress, you know, to

497
00:23:50,160 --> 00:23:54,639
Speaker 3: the complicity of like you know, you know, not meeting

498
00:23:54,680 --> 00:23:58,160
Speaker 3: expectations to yourself or to others, or you know, there's

499
00:23:58,240 --> 00:24:01,959
Speaker 3: just so much about the depression that's just scary, especially

500
00:24:02,000 --> 00:24:05,560
Speaker 3: in the artist community. Man, it's a torture community, you know,

501
00:24:05,600 --> 00:24:08,240
Speaker 3: it's a sad community. It's a broken community.

502
00:24:07,760 --> 00:24:12,240
Speaker 1: That defines light and art, you know. And when art.

503
00:24:12,200 --> 00:24:17,199
Speaker 3: Is isn't diluted or fractured by an industry that's you know,

504
00:24:17,240 --> 00:24:20,480
Speaker 3: that has to make money, you know, it's hard for you.

505
00:24:20,480 --> 00:24:21,840
Speaker 1: To continue to enjoy it, you know.

506
00:24:21,920 --> 00:24:24,560
Speaker 3: And you know, I've lost a lot of friends to

507
00:24:25,720 --> 00:24:32,000
Speaker 3: you know, unfortunate unfortunate suicides, drug addictions.

508
00:24:31,400 --> 00:24:34,200
Speaker 1: You know, And and it's really really scary.

509
00:24:34,840 --> 00:24:37,960
Speaker 4: Yeah, because they have no place to direct that that

510
00:24:38,200 --> 00:24:41,199
Speaker 4: whatever it is that's happening inside. You know, did you

511
00:24:41,240 --> 00:24:45,280
Speaker 4: find your parents ever had some place to direct that

512
00:24:45,440 --> 00:24:46,760
Speaker 4: where they could release that.

513
00:24:46,920 --> 00:24:54,720
Speaker 3: My mom never has. She wears it like the baddest

514
00:24:54,720 --> 00:24:55,280
Speaker 3: woman alive.

515
00:24:56,800 --> 00:24:57,040
Speaker 2: You know.

516
00:24:58,160 --> 00:25:00,600
Speaker 3: There are times when I've seen her crime, you know,

517
00:25:00,720 --> 00:25:04,280
Speaker 3: and and when she cries, she lets some of all

518
00:25:04,320 --> 00:25:05,240
Speaker 3: of that stuff out.

519
00:25:05,560 --> 00:25:08,919
Speaker 1: You can tell. It's like thirty forty years of things

520
00:25:08,960 --> 00:25:09,360
Speaker 1: they just.

521
00:25:09,320 --> 00:25:12,040
Speaker 3: Like come out in one cry and then and then

522
00:25:12,080 --> 00:25:16,560
Speaker 3: she doesn't cry for like another ten years. My mom is,

523
00:25:18,840 --> 00:25:21,520
Speaker 3: at eyesight, the strongest woman've ever met in my life.

524
00:25:23,080 --> 00:25:26,320
Speaker 3: But that doesn't mean she's not putting it together inside

525
00:25:26,320 --> 00:25:29,480
Speaker 3: of her every day, you know, trying to like get it,

526
00:25:29,840 --> 00:25:31,800
Speaker 3: you know, get it to a happier place.

527
00:25:31,880 --> 00:25:35,560
Speaker 2: It doesn't doesn't, you know, doesn't wear it on her sleeve.

528
00:25:35,680 --> 00:25:37,240
Speaker 1: No, she will never know.

529
00:25:37,480 --> 00:25:39,560
Speaker 3: You will never know, right, And you know, I would

530
00:25:39,560 --> 00:25:42,960
Speaker 3: say that my daughter has definitely brought new sunshine into

531
00:25:43,000 --> 00:25:43,440
Speaker 3: her house.

532
00:25:43,640 --> 00:25:44,000
Speaker 2: Yeah.

533
00:25:44,040 --> 00:25:45,120
Speaker 1: And the same thing with my dad.

534
00:25:45,520 --> 00:25:47,800
Speaker 3: Yeah, they all, you know, they all have things that

535
00:25:47,880 --> 00:25:50,320
Speaker 3: they just I don't know if they'll ever be able

536
00:25:50,320 --> 00:25:53,840
Speaker 3: to say out loud how they feel, whether they're sad

537
00:25:53,960 --> 00:25:56,080
Speaker 3: or not. And I mean I think my dad in

538
00:25:56,200 --> 00:25:58,520
Speaker 3: his older age, I think he's definitely a lot softer now,

539
00:25:58,560 --> 00:26:00,359
Speaker 3: and you know, he cries a lot easier, you know,

540
00:26:00,480 --> 00:26:02,560
Speaker 3: and he cries of happiness, he cries of you know,

541
00:26:02,600 --> 00:26:03,200
Speaker 3: all these things.

542
00:26:03,240 --> 00:26:05,520
Speaker 1: But yeah, I don't think they have either, you know.

543
00:26:05,560 --> 00:26:07,480
Speaker 3: And I think it's a pattern, right, It's like that's

544
00:26:07,480 --> 00:26:08,960
Speaker 3: a that's the thing, you know, it's a it's a

545
00:26:09,040 --> 00:26:10,679
Speaker 3: it's a pattern that happens in our lives.

546
00:26:20,760 --> 00:26:23,040
Speaker 2: So do you feel that you've broken that pattern?

547
00:26:23,560 --> 00:26:28,040
Speaker 3: I think I have. I'm more conscious, you know. I mean,

548
00:26:28,280 --> 00:26:30,560
Speaker 3: look the way we talk to each other, right, there's

549
00:26:30,600 --> 00:26:32,000
Speaker 3: times when you call me I'm like, hey, I just

550
00:26:32,000 --> 00:26:35,159
Speaker 3: want to make sure right, to make sure that you know,

551
00:26:35,280 --> 00:26:37,680
Speaker 3: you knew kind of how I meant when I send

552
00:26:37,720 --> 00:26:41,760
Speaker 3: you that text, right, Like our parents would never do that.

553
00:26:41,840 --> 00:26:43,920
Speaker 1: They're like take it, to leave it and see whatever

554
00:26:43,920 --> 00:26:44,800
Speaker 1: it comes back. You know.

555
00:26:46,280 --> 00:26:48,880
Speaker 3: But you're so much more aware of the atmosphere than

556
00:26:48,880 --> 00:26:51,000
Speaker 3: the harmony that you create in your life. And like,

557
00:26:51,720 --> 00:26:54,680
Speaker 3: you know, you and I never had an uncomfortable situation.

558
00:26:54,760 --> 00:26:57,120
Speaker 3: We've never had a situation where we're like it has

559
00:26:57,200 --> 00:27:03,239
Speaker 3: to get to like not talking, like why, Like I

560
00:27:03,280 --> 00:27:05,399
Speaker 3: can't even fathom not talking to Freddie, you know what

561
00:27:05,440 --> 00:27:07,879
Speaker 3: I mean, Like it doesn't make sense, right, Like, we

562
00:27:07,920 --> 00:27:10,639
Speaker 3: don't we don't have the we don't have the stubbornness

563
00:27:10,720 --> 00:27:11,280
Speaker 3: to say like.

564
00:27:11,800 --> 00:27:15,880
Speaker 1: Oh he calls me, yeah, no, no, I call you first.

565
00:27:16,000 --> 00:27:18,119
Speaker 1: You called me first. If he's quatched whatever, it's gonna call.

566
00:27:18,240 --> 00:27:19,800
Speaker 3: And we've never had to by the way, just for

567
00:27:19,840 --> 00:27:23,320
Speaker 3: the record, we've never had to squatch anything, you know.

568
00:27:23,920 --> 00:27:26,920
Speaker 1: But you've always been an incredibly supportive friend.

569
00:27:27,359 --> 00:27:30,639
Speaker 4: Thank you, brother, Thank you man, and same same, And

570
00:27:30,960 --> 00:27:34,240
Speaker 4: I'm really happy that we're using this platform to to

571
00:27:34,320 --> 00:27:36,840
Speaker 4: talk about this. You have no idea how many times

572
00:27:36,880 --> 00:27:41,560
Speaker 4: I've had the same conversation behind the scenes with people

573
00:27:42,400 --> 00:27:45,560
Speaker 4: who don't don't feel comfortable talking about it, don't feel

574
00:27:45,560 --> 00:27:47,280
Speaker 4: comfortable bringing that subject matter on.

575
00:27:47,560 --> 00:27:47,760
Speaker 1: You know.

576
00:27:49,560 --> 00:27:53,840
Speaker 4: I've you know, I can't begin to tell you how

577
00:27:53,840 --> 00:27:57,840
Speaker 4: many people I've come across, whether people I'm close to

578
00:27:58,040 --> 00:28:01,760
Speaker 4: or not, who are just in so much pain. You know,

579
00:28:01,960 --> 00:28:05,760
Speaker 4: they're just in so much pain, and that pain continues

580
00:28:05,840 --> 00:28:08,320
Speaker 4: to bleed in places where it shouldn't.

581
00:28:08,400 --> 00:28:08,600
Speaker 1: You know.

582
00:28:09,600 --> 00:28:11,360
Speaker 4: And then when I start, when I begin to have

583
00:28:11,400 --> 00:28:15,320
Speaker 4: these conversations about healing, they look at me like I'm

584
00:28:15,359 --> 00:28:18,520
Speaker 4: crazy sometimes, you know, or like I'm presenting some sort

585
00:28:18,560 --> 00:28:23,359
Speaker 4: of new agey thing, you know. You know, I had

586
00:28:23,400 --> 00:28:25,560
Speaker 4: a friend of mine who's like, oh, man, it's just

587
00:28:25,600 --> 00:28:26,840
Speaker 4: some Hollywood shit, man.

588
00:28:26,960 --> 00:28:30,920
Speaker 2: You know, I'm like, no, dude, it's not Hollywood shit.

589
00:28:31,040 --> 00:28:31,200
Speaker 4: Man.

590
00:28:31,320 --> 00:28:34,119
Speaker 1: It's it's you know, you're going through some stuff.

591
00:28:33,760 --> 00:28:36,479
Speaker 2: And you have to heal from it.

592
00:28:36,520 --> 00:28:36,720
Speaker 1: You know.

593
00:28:36,880 --> 00:28:40,400
Speaker 4: It's like the concept of having to heal from it

594
00:28:40,440 --> 00:28:42,160
Speaker 4: is like it's foreign, you know.

595
00:28:44,520 --> 00:28:48,000
Speaker 1: Yeah, no, it's it's very real. It's very real.

596
00:28:48,080 --> 00:28:48,840
Speaker 2: Yeah.

597
00:28:48,880 --> 00:28:54,600
Speaker 3: Well, look, I feel happy that we can have a

598
00:28:54,640 --> 00:28:56,720
Speaker 3: platform to just be vulnerable.

599
00:28:56,320 --> 00:28:58,080
Speaker 1: And say, hey, we don't have all the answers here.

600
00:28:58,200 --> 00:29:00,960
Speaker 3: We're not supposed to have all the answers, but we

601
00:29:01,040 --> 00:29:03,240
Speaker 3: at the very least can create a space where we

602
00:29:03,280 --> 00:29:05,800
Speaker 3: can all just say it out loud, you know, just

603
00:29:05,880 --> 00:29:08,240
Speaker 3: say that like we don't have it all together or

604
00:29:08,320 --> 00:29:10,760
Speaker 3: sometimes you know, and and that we're you know, we're

605
00:29:10,800 --> 00:29:12,320
Speaker 3: trying to be strong, and we're trying to be happy

606
00:29:12,320 --> 00:29:14,880
Speaker 3: with where we live and with the few years that we.

607
00:29:14,880 --> 00:29:17,240
Speaker 1: May have left in this earth. You gotta make the

608
00:29:17,280 --> 00:29:17,960
Speaker 1: most of it, you know.

609
00:29:18,040 --> 00:29:21,280
Speaker 3: So you know, for everyone who's listening and everyone who's

610
00:29:21,320 --> 00:29:25,760
Speaker 3: out there at home feeling and you know, and wondering

611
00:29:26,080 --> 00:29:29,680
Speaker 3: if there's anyone out there that would understand or or

612
00:29:29,800 --> 00:29:30,840
Speaker 3: feels the.

613
00:29:30,800 --> 00:29:34,520
Speaker 1: Way you do, You're understood. There is a world, there

614
00:29:34,600 --> 00:29:35,480
Speaker 1: is a place.

615
00:29:35,600 --> 00:29:39,240
Speaker 3: You know, and we share it all together, and you'll

616
00:29:39,280 --> 00:29:41,200
Speaker 3: be surprised how many people out there are willing to

617
00:29:41,560 --> 00:29:43,440
Speaker 3: not just pick up the phone but be there before you.

618
00:29:44,320 --> 00:29:46,440
Speaker 3: So if you're in a dark place and you're going

619
00:29:46,480 --> 00:29:49,960
Speaker 3: to something and this happens to finds you, please know

620
00:29:50,280 --> 00:29:55,000
Speaker 3: that there's hodlines, there's friends, you know, there's family members

621
00:29:55,000 --> 00:29:58,959
Speaker 3: you haven't called, and you're not alone in that feeling.

622
00:29:59,600 --> 00:30:03,280
Speaker 4: Yeah, don't and don't allow how you've been brought up,

623
00:30:04,000 --> 00:30:06,160
Speaker 4: Dictate the moves that you make.

624
00:30:07,600 --> 00:30:09,040
Speaker 2: In order to get help right.

625
00:30:10,480 --> 00:30:13,040
Speaker 4: You know. I've run into that so many times, you know,

626
00:30:13,920 --> 00:30:16,080
Speaker 4: where people are like, well, that's not how my parents

627
00:30:16,120 --> 00:30:18,400
Speaker 4: did it, that's not how my grandparents did it. Well,

628
00:30:19,160 --> 00:30:21,560
Speaker 4: this is a different time and a different generation, you know.

629
00:30:22,000 --> 00:30:27,520
Speaker 3: And there's nothing more courageous, yeah, than saying how you feel.

630
00:30:28,600 --> 00:30:31,960
Speaker 3: It takes real bravery, a real courage to just speak

631
00:30:32,000 --> 00:30:35,520
Speaker 3: aloud and say I'm not okay. There's no strength in

632
00:30:35,640 --> 00:30:39,040
Speaker 3: like swallowing it. The strength really comes from you taking

633
00:30:39,080 --> 00:30:42,800
Speaker 3: its power by actually invoking it out loud. Once he

634
00:30:42,920 --> 00:30:46,520
Speaker 3: leaves your mouth, he leaves your body. So the more

635
00:30:46,560 --> 00:30:50,160
Speaker 3: you can express it, the faster you can get to healing.

636
00:30:51,120 --> 00:30:54,560
Speaker 3: And anyway, I hope this episode helped you, guys, And

637
00:30:54,600 --> 00:30:57,640
Speaker 3: I want to thank Josh, you know, forgiving us this

638
00:30:58,160 --> 00:31:03,880
Speaker 3: varies and know, drink really delicious drink, and Josh really

639
00:31:03,880 --> 00:31:04,400
Speaker 3: appreciate you.

640
00:31:04,400 --> 00:31:05,560
Speaker 1: Man, appreciate you, guys.

641
00:31:05,560 --> 00:31:05,840
Speaker 2: Thank you.

642
00:31:06,400 --> 00:31:08,520
Speaker 1: And this is those Amigos.

643
00:31:09,560 --> 00:31:12,160
Speaker 4: I am Wilmer Valderrama, I am Freddie Rodriguez and we

644
00:31:12,240 --> 00:31:20,800
Speaker 4: are signing off. Dose Amigos is a production from WV

645
00:31:20,960 --> 00:31:24,960
Speaker 4: Sound and iHeartMedia's Michael through That podcast network, hosted by Me,

646
00:31:25,320 --> 00:31:27,600
Speaker 4: Freddie Rodriguez and Wilmer Valdorama.

647
00:31:27,880 --> 00:31:32,040
Speaker 3: Those Amigos is produced by Aaron Burlson and Sophie Spencers Abos.

648
00:31:32,080 --> 00:31:36,840
Speaker 4: Our executive producers are Wilmer Valdorama, Freddie Rodriguez, Aaron Burlson

649
00:31:36,960 --> 00:31:39,160
Speaker 4: and Leo Klem at WV Sound.

650
00:31:39,360 --> 00:31:41,680
Speaker 3: This episode was shot and edited it by Ryan Posts

651
00:31:41,720 --> 00:31:44,800
Speaker 3: and mixed by Sean Tracy and features original music by

652
00:31:44,800 --> 00:31:46,440
Speaker 3: Madison Devenport and Helo Boy.

653
00:31:46,600 --> 00:31:50,120
Speaker 4: Our cover art photography is by David Avalos and designed

654
00:31:50,160 --> 00:31:51,840
Speaker 4: by Deny Holtzkall and.

655
00:31:51,880 --> 00:31:54,480
Speaker 3: Thank you for being at Third Amigo today. I appreciate

656
00:31:54,520 --> 00:31:56,200
Speaker 3: you guys always listening to Those Amigos.

657
00:31:56,480 --> 00:31:58,640
Speaker 4: The more podcasts from my Heart, visit the ir heart

658
00:31:58,680 --> 00:32:01,760
Speaker 4: Radio app, apple Pot Podcast, or wherever you listen to

659
00:32:01,800 --> 00:32:02,640
Speaker 4: your favorite shows.

660
00:32:02,920 --> 00:32:06,160
Speaker 1: See you next week.

661
00:32:09,040 --> 00:32:09,080
Speaker 4: M