Speaker 1: Down the line, say something fucked up does happen and
Speaker 1: I do end up getting a blood clot. Bitch, I'm
Speaker 1: living one because I'm never gonna die. Like I'm the
Speaker 1: luckiest person alive. I'll never die. And in two years
Speaker 1: and I'm dead, they're gonna clip that and be like.
Speaker 2: You're like genuinely not that we feel invincible.
Speaker 1: No one's gonna kill me exactly.
Speaker 2: I'm not being killed by accident, yep. And that's that
Speaker 2: on that.
Speaker 3: I'm not gonna go into depth, but it's just like I.
Speaker 1: I think we can infer what you mean, okay.
Speaker 3: But like not in like a scary way, because I
Speaker 3: don't want to scare anyone or like trigger anyone, or
Speaker 3: like make anyone feel uncomfortable. But like I remember, this
Speaker 3: is a conversation I had with a friend when we
Speaker 3: first met, and we had a debate about this where
Speaker 3: I was like, no fucking murderer is going to murder me, bitch,
Speaker 3: I see you coming, and I feel like I have
Speaker 3: no other option. I'm doing the job because I'm not
Speaker 3: giving you the serious satisfaction.
Speaker 1: Of you're not getting off on killing me.
Speaker 3: Yeah, no one is getting off on killing me, not
Speaker 3: even the universe. So if I gotta do what I
Speaker 3: gotta do, I'm gonna do what.
Speaker 4: I gotta do.
Speaker 1: Alright, cycle my body back to Earth. But what I
Speaker 1: was saying is like, I'm not going to die from
Speaker 1: the vaccine, and if for some reason in thirty years
Speaker 1: my blood starts clotting, I'm going to survive, and I'm
Speaker 1: going to sue and I'm going to get my bag
Speaker 1: and I'm going to distribute my wealth.
Speaker 3: L the most insane hypothetical ever, Like.
Speaker 4: Okay, girl, why.
Speaker 1: The way I take hypotheticals so serious? Like like sometimes
Speaker 1: like we're close to ending our relationship over fucking.
Speaker 3: Hypothetical and it's literally because of me being like I
Speaker 3: don't believe in aliens, and Drew will literally throw a fit,
Speaker 3: like I will ever see this man as angry as
Speaker 3: me disagreeing with the hypothetical and he gets so mad
Speaker 3: because I just I can't get into it.
Speaker 2: I'm like, I am grounded in reality.
Speaker 1: It's because you're disagreeing with everything at my core. It's
Speaker 1: like it's like you literally just disagree with me.
Speaker 3: Sh I tell you about one time me and Ryan
Speaker 3: were out for drinks and it was with Josh too,
Speaker 3: and it's the hypothetical of marrying Harry Styles or Tipothy
Speaker 3: schallomet on the spot came up and I said I
Speaker 3: wouldn't do that. I was like, I don't know them.
Speaker 3: I was like, not only my core, at my core,
Speaker 3: I don't believe in marriage, because it's fucking insane. I'm
Speaker 3: not marrying anyone, not even the love of my life
Speaker 3: at any point in my life.
Speaker 2: So why would I marry this married Huh? You wish
Speaker 2: we got married?
Speaker 3: You tried to see, like I said, not even my
Speaker 3: platonic soulmate can bag me. No one is getting me
Speaker 3: to sign those stupid fucking papers.
Speaker 2: And then she got really, really mad. She was so
Speaker 2: upset me.
Speaker 1: I'm about to get upset to you right now.
Speaker 3: Like, Okay, first of all, I don't think, and this
Speaker 3: is a big take, I don't think sexually we would
Speaker 3: have good chemistry, me and Harry or me and Timothy
Speaker 3: Shallon May could you imagine us kissing?
Speaker 1: No, I literally cannot even imagine, Like those are.
Speaker 3: Just two men that, like, I don't think biologically we
Speaker 3: could get it going anyways.
Speaker 2: So I'm not hearing that, Like, I'm not doing that
Speaker 2: to myself.
Speaker 1: Style, Like they're two.
Speaker 3: They are so disconnected from reality. In my head, I
Speaker 3: cannot comprehend that they are living beings, let alone having
Speaker 3: to have some sort of like relationship with them like that,
Speaker 3: Like maybe Timothy on like a friendly level, but even that,
Speaker 3: like I crack up at his existence, not because I
Speaker 3: find him like corny or anything, but people at that
Speaker 3: level literally make me laugh. It's like Kylie Jenner, like
Speaker 3: if I came up to me and just starting dogg
Speaker 3: to me, I would corract the fun.
Speaker 1: I'm like, you're you're not, Like there is.
Speaker 2: No comprehending someone.
Speaker 3: And also because I just think about like so sometimes
Speaker 3: when our followers meet us and they're like I can't believe,
Speaker 3: like I'm looking at you right now, like that.
Speaker 2: With Timothy Shall with Harry Styles, I have like put
Speaker 2: that man is a like god. No, he is a fucking.
Speaker 3: Three D render, like not a real human, Like I'm
Speaker 3: fascinated about his existence since I was literally yeah, his
Speaker 3: fucking cock since I was like fourteen, So therefore his
Speaker 3: cock does not exist. Actually, I literally can't look at
Speaker 3: anyone and see their genitals, like.
Speaker 1: My biggest where are you going now?
Speaker 3: I'm just ranting, but like no, you know how like
Speaker 3: some people like, wait, now, listen, you know some people
Speaker 3: look at someone and they like, can sexualize someone. I
Speaker 3: cannot sexualize anyone for the life of me, Like I
Speaker 3: genuinely I have.
Speaker 1: To whoa I can.
Speaker 3: I have to get to know someone first, and then
Speaker 3: I'm like, oh, maybe maybe, but I don't. I don't
Speaker 3: find people sexy, like I'm not. I find woman sexy,
Speaker 3: but like, man, I'm like, can you fucking get the
Speaker 3: fuck out of my face?
Speaker 1: But that's it, damn Okay.
Speaker 2: I just have to get a man.
Speaker 3: To know a man first, because men like off Rip
Speaker 3: are oh gross.
Speaker 1: Gross I wholeheartedly agree with.
Speaker 3: Yeah, and then when you get to know them, it's like, Okay, stinky,
Speaker 3: I kind of like you.
Speaker 1: Okay, stinky, Okay, onion powder, you know what, onion powder?
Speaker 1: I kind of like you.
Speaker 3: But yeah, that's my rant about not being able to
Speaker 3: imagine myself marrying Timothy Shallamy or Harry's house.
Speaker 1: I'd have sex with both of them. I mean, we
Speaker 1: could talk about how I know for one thousand percent
Speaker 1: fact that I can cross the big red balls and
Speaker 1: wipe out without a doubt if they put them in
Speaker 1: front of me. Right now, I would literally go so
Speaker 1: be snow.
Speaker 3: Just say you couldn't carry a gallon of milk and
Speaker 3: you think you're crossing those balls.
Speaker 1: I'm crossing those balls with zero effort, like I'm just
Speaker 1: running like a robot across Like literally, that's all you
Speaker 1: have to do is just run across. Like these bitches
Speaker 1: have the wrong strategy when they dive onto it, like yeah,
Speaker 1: of course you're gonna fucking fly off, like bounce off
Speaker 1: your simple physics. It's literally like I have it all
Speaker 1: worked out in my brain, like.
Speaker 3: Physics, Well, then apply to me on fucking wipe out.
Speaker 3: I don't think it's the hardest thing in the world.
Speaker 1: No, I'm literally gonna rent them for myself just to
Speaker 1: prove it to myself.
Speaker 3: I would love that because I would love to try.
Speaker 1: That's my next video is like, literally.
Speaker 2: Where are you gonna rent that? You're acting like it's
Speaker 2: that fucking that sky zone you have to.
Speaker 1: Like, I'll figure it out. I'll figure it out. I
Speaker 1: figured everything out there.
Speaker 5: You do nothing.
Speaker 3: Literally, yesterday Drew was like, I want to see a
Speaker 3: building get demolish. I'm gonna go do that.
Speaker 2: I was like sometimes when Drew said my passenger see
Speaker 2: talking in the car.
Speaker 3: I genuinely feel like there's an automated like AI machine
Speaker 3: trying to make something to relate to me, and it's
Speaker 3: just missing because I'm like, what are you talking about?
Speaker 1: Okay, I just want to see a building fall. It's
Speaker 1: poetic almost. It's like the destruction of humanity post capitalism,
Speaker 1: like buildings falling. It's beautiful.
Speaker 3: And I have literally every TikTok the post capitalist ramifications
Speaker 3: of the deep popification.
Speaker 1: Yeah, literally, but I just think seeing a building fall
Speaker 1: would hit a spot in me that needs to be hit.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I get that because I was it be beautiful
Speaker 3: like literally, that was like when we lived in thirteen
Speaker 3: oh four and we like all had like a.
Speaker 1: That weird healthy. So basically, no, don't even talk about it.
Speaker 1: Don't it's bad.
Speaker 5: It's bad.
Speaker 1: Like that's something that.
Speaker 3: Says you wanted to see buildings get like basically blown up.
Speaker 3: But like again, no one inside we just like it's
Speaker 3: it's just like wanting to see that kind of thing.
Speaker 1: It's just like I want just destruction and chaos. Like literally,
Speaker 1: for the longest time, I just wanted chaos, and then
Speaker 1: I got chaos and I was like take it back, please.
Speaker 3: I can't do that anymore.
Speaker 2: And you were like, wait, why does that sound fun?
Speaker 1: Why does that sound wit?
Speaker 3: Sounds lit fucking stupid?
Speaker 6: Yeah, okay, last bill I'll expose is I went to
Speaker 6: like the the gynecologists, like six no, dude, it's almost
Speaker 6: a year ago now.
Speaker 3: I went to the gynecologists because I was like, I
Speaker 3: need to just go get my kuchie checked on because something.
Speaker 1: Funky is this discharge looks a little funny.
Speaker 2: Fun Town is getting a little too funny.
Speaker 1: And honest, honestly like her discharge did taste.
Speaker 5: Weird, like.
Speaker 3: Funky down was violating some of the clauses in their bill.
Speaker 2: But yeah, it.
Speaker 3: Was itchy, stinks thinks that's the scary part. It didn't
Speaker 3: smell different. That was what was scaring me actually. But
Speaker 3: basically I found out that I had bacterial imaginosis and
Speaker 3: I used to affection at the same damn time.
Speaker 2: But it's pretty common.
Speaker 1: But we made sour dough bread in that oven.
Speaker 3: Fuck it's with you. But basically when I went they
Speaker 3: were like, oh, they were like, you have to get
Speaker 3: tests to know if you have bacterial vaginosis. And they
Speaker 3: were like, well, we have to test this swab and
Speaker 3: that the lab tests are going to run you like
Speaker 3: five hundred dollars because I also don't have health insurance.
Speaker 3: And then I was like okay, and they were like, oh,
Speaker 3: but you could just pay two fifty now and we'll
Speaker 3: send you the two fifty bill later if that makes
Speaker 3: you more comfortable. We like, when after we get the
Speaker 3: test results back, we'll give you the rest. And I
Speaker 3: was like, yeah, I'm gonna do that because like, one,
Speaker 3: I don't want to spend five hundred dollars right now,
Speaker 3: and then two, how the fuck do I know y'all
Speaker 3: are actually gonna give you those results? So I was
Speaker 3: like okay, and I spent the two fifty and I
Speaker 3: was like, okay, yeah, I even have the voice memos
Speaker 3: that I sent to you when I was like, I
Speaker 3: just spent five hundred dollars for my pussy to be
Speaker 3: fucking swabbed, but the fact that that's a voice mevel
Speaker 3: on my phone, I need to find it. Basically. Not
Speaker 3: too long later, I get a pretty little bill in
Speaker 3: the mail and I'm like, oh, this is the two
Speaker 3: fifty I owe. I opened it and it's sixteen hundred
Speaker 3: dollars and it doesn't they gave me an itemized bill.
Speaker 3: It doesn't have any lay fees on there or anything.
Speaker 3: That's see, that's why you bitch should have kept your
Speaker 3: fucking mouth shut, letting everyone, letting everyone know that we
Speaker 3: need Like I wish there was a way for everyone
Speaker 3: to know that you needed to get an itemized bill
Speaker 3: without the people themselves knowing, Like the people who will
Speaker 3: give you itemized bill because now they know that, they're like, bitch,
Speaker 3: don't ask any questions. We're gonna send you the itemized
Speaker 3: bill and you can even ask for it. Yeah, but
Speaker 3: basically I haven't paid that back, and I'd literally rather
Speaker 3: my fucking pussy shrivel up and fall off my body
Speaker 3: and then to go back like because I die.
Speaker 2: I'm not giving you all any more money.
Speaker 1: We're literally just airing out like us like breaking the law,
Speaker 1: like we are literally criminals and fugitives because I have
Speaker 1: a medical bill that I have insurance, like I have insurance,
Speaker 1: and for some reason they keep trying to get me
Speaker 1: to pay two hundred and sixty dollars and I'm like
Speaker 1: evading that bill, like fuck y'all, I'm not paying that, Like,
Speaker 1: come for my credit. I don't even have a credit
Speaker 1: score because I will never ever, ever ever get a
Speaker 1: credit score. I swear to girl.
Speaker 3: You say that, and so we need to fucking get
Speaker 3: our own apartments and how the fuck are you gonna
Speaker 3: move in?
Speaker 1: You're gonna co sign for me?
Speaker 3: I will I do that for all my friends.
Speaker 5: Thank you.
Speaker 1: I was thinking about that last night. I was like, now,
Speaker 1: how the fuck am I gonna get a car in
Speaker 1: an apartment? I was like, I'll just have someone sign.
Speaker 3: I literally would co sign. I co signed for all
Speaker 3: my days. I'll take the l because I don't because
Speaker 3: I don't believe in that ship anyway. I'm like a
Speaker 3: credit score, I don't know what. Then you're not going
Speaker 3: about like you can see my credit score, but I
Speaker 3: don't know if you want to believe that, like they
Speaker 3: say all sorts of lies. You say no, no, no,
Speaker 3: but yeah, we need to pay that bill because like.
Speaker 1: No, because you're not gonna we're not gonna be able
Speaker 1: to get our own places.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I know my credit score is not budget. I'm
Speaker 3: just gonna have to be like, please, look like, believe
Speaker 3: in me.
Speaker 1: With some faith in me.
Speaker 3: Ye have a little just in mad.
Speaker 1: We should wait until the stock market crashes, the housing
Speaker 1: market crashes because it's just been put afloat. They've been
Speaker 1: prolonging two thousand and eight for so long. And then
Speaker 1: we just buy houses because they'll be like literally pennies
Speaker 1: on the dollar. Like I will buy a three point
Speaker 1: one million dollar home for one million dollars and I
Speaker 1: will get rich in four years off that house. Baby,
Speaker 1: that's my I don't.
Speaker 3: Know anything about that anyway, Let's get back to the
Speaker 3: topic of this fucking podcast. Yeah, the day I wore that,
Speaker 3: like Elmer Fudd, I was out for ice cream with
Speaker 3: Mason and Dante, and I like took it off to
Speaker 3: talk about how greasy my hair was. It was literally
Speaker 3: like laid flat, like I put yelling to your head.
Speaker 1: The caps stuck to your head.
Speaker 3: And that's okay because you have to try your hair
Speaker 3: to be.
Speaker 1: Oily and also it's healthy. And also when you get
Speaker 1: like when you get three weeks deep and like you
Speaker 1: like wring out the oil, it's like actually free cooking oil.
Speaker 3: I've decided I'm gonna start slapping people. Like imagine when
Speaker 3: you said.
Speaker 1: That, I just went like start doing it, like I
Speaker 1: literally give you permission too, just like I okay, you
Speaker 1: know those videos, Oh my god, like you know those
Speaker 1: videos of like people getting like massive amounts of like disgusting,
Speaker 1: rotting food poured all over them when they're asleep, or
Speaker 1: like gallon buckets of water port on them, or like
Speaker 1: mustard bottles squirted on them. I gave everyone in my
Speaker 1: life permission to do that to me, just when I'm
Speaker 1: least expecting it. And like the other night, I fell
Speaker 1: asleep when everyone is still awake, and like I heard
Speaker 1: Kai mention. He was like, we should like mustard, we
Speaker 1: should do it to Drew, and I like, I like, actually,
Speaker 1: like got so fucking angry inside. I was like, I
Speaker 1: swear to God, if they try to do that shit
Speaker 1: to me right now, I will freak the I know.
Speaker 2: Every time you keep saying like y'all have for richure
Speaker 2: to do that to me, we literally like you can't
Speaker 2: make noise around you when he's asleep.
Speaker 3: He will fall asleep in the middle of all the
Speaker 3: fun and then be like wake up and be like
Speaker 3: or like you do this thing, or you like toss
Speaker 3: around really angrily instead of saying everything, like.
Speaker 1: Like everyone will just be in the living room like
Speaker 1: chatting it up, and then I'm like I just doze off.
Speaker 1: I fall asleep, and then I get actually angry when
Speaker 1: people wake me up when I'm the one that's sleeping
Speaker 1: in the wrong spot, like it's actually like so wrong,
Speaker 1: like I'll storm out of the room. But it's just
Speaker 1: I'm not actually angry. It's just like I'm fucking tired
Speaker 1: and I'm like woking up.
Speaker 5: No.
Speaker 3: I feel that when we went to that waterfall thing,
Speaker 3: I like it's falling asleep and I was having one
Speaker 3: of those nights where like, for some reason, I think
Speaker 3: usually I'm pretty good at that, Like if I fall
Speaker 3: asleep around people, I like usually don't make a fuss
Speaker 3: or say anything about it because I can literally sleep
Speaker 3: through anything. But on the it's like in Big Sir,
Speaker 3: I was falling asleep and they we all fell asleep
Speaker 3: watching something on the TV, and I was like, turn
Speaker 3: it off, turn it off, like and Josh just being
Speaker 3: really nice because we had to share, but he was like,
Speaker 3: do you like is it the light er?
Speaker 4: Is it the noise?
Speaker 3: I was like this is both turn it off. And
Speaker 3: I was like turn it off and like thinging ding
Speaker 3: ding ding, And then Christian was on the other side.
Speaker 2: Of the room eating chips and I was trying so.
Speaker 3: Actually before before the chips, him and Lucas were whispering
Speaker 3: to each other and all I he was like.
Speaker 4: And out.
Speaker 2: I was like, all I fucking hear right now?
Speaker 3: Is stop? Like and I said that and then they
Speaker 3: like just kind of laughed but then stop.
Speaker 2: And then I couldn't hear Christian eating his chips and
Speaker 2: trying so hard to be quiet because it would.
Speaker 3: Be like like.
Speaker 2: And then he would like.
Speaker 1: The worst type of angry is when you're like actually
Speaker 1: angry and then like the people you're angry at just laughing.
Speaker 1: I was gonna I was gonna mention Miami, like, dude,
Speaker 1: that ship was actually diabolical. That was real drunk. It's okay,
Speaker 1: it's it's like irun, it's chill now. But like literally
Speaker 1: I was so mad. I snapped. It was like my
Speaker 1: breaking point, Like I snapped, Like I was asleep peacefully
Speaker 1: in the room. Indian and O'Ryan had like gone out,
Speaker 1: and I was like, I don't want to like go
Speaker 1: out to a clerb tonight. I'm like good just like
Speaker 1: hanging out and like going to sleep early whatever, and
Speaker 1: like in you and O Ryan stumbling like three hours later,
Speaker 1: I was like dead asleep and they are just like
Speaker 1: literally the loudest I've ever heard them be in my
Speaker 1: entire life. They were like that's it felt like they
Speaker 1: were like, let's be as loud as possible to piss
Speaker 1: off Drew in particular.
Speaker 3: And I don't remember thinking for a second about the
Speaker 3: fact that you were seeing like I was just.
Speaker 1: On one and and I like I tried my hardest.
Speaker 5: I really did.
Speaker 1: I like covered my head with my pillow. I did
Speaker 1: my thrash. I thrashed couple times, like as a warning sign.
Speaker 1: It's like literally me like warning y'all. It's like like
Speaker 1: I'm about to snap if y'all don't shut the fuck up.
Speaker 1: And then I just not. I don't even remember what you.
Speaker 3: Were like, this is literally the meanest thing anyone's ever
Speaker 3: done to me. Like a ride just laughed. It was
Speaker 3: so mean, and.
Speaker 1: I was like, wow, I have like actually was like
Speaker 1: really angry, Like he was like in my heart angry,
Speaker 1: like seeing red.
Speaker 3: If everyone on the planet Earth decided like and he
Speaker 3: is the.
Speaker 2: One going to the moon, no bitch, I'm killing myself.
Speaker 2: I don't want to go to the moon. There's no
Speaker 2: one there, there's nothing there.
Speaker 1: I would wholehearted, I would accept that fully. Like if
Speaker 1: someone was like, go to the moon, I'd be like, yeah,
Speaker 1: I'm going to the fucking moon with a guarantee I
Speaker 1: wouldn't explode in space, like I would fully go.
Speaker 2: No, I don't want that.
Speaker 3: I want like attention for being like hot and funny
Speaker 3: and like creative.
Speaker 1: You'd be the hot, funny creative first.
Speaker 2: No, I'd be the fucking nerd on the moon.
Speaker 1: No, you'd be the first hot, funny, creative girl on
Speaker 1: the moon.
Speaker 3: If I can, okay, if I can go to the
Speaker 3: moon with my tits out, I would go to the moon.
Speaker 1: Girl, you can in this hypothetical you can.
Speaker 2: Okay, then yeah I'm going to the moon.
Speaker 1: Yeah. Convincing you to go to the moon, like you
Speaker 1: can have your tits out if you want.
Speaker 3: You literally can't.
Speaker 2: Like I guess if they built a suit with like
Speaker 2: a shell.
Speaker 1: Around my mind, well, they will free the nipple in
Speaker 1: our lifetime, Like the nipple will be free. I believe
Speaker 1: that you.
Speaker 2: Shut your fucking morouth, like just think before you speak.
Speaker 3: But basically I don't believe in moon travel. Drew his also,
Speaker 3: I guess commercialized. I don't fuck with billionaires going to
Speaker 3: the moon. We need to kill these motherfuckers there.
Speaker 1: William down to death to the billionaires. Literally though, like.
Speaker 3: Did you actually say that the billionaires you like really
Speaker 3: gave a show of it.
Speaker 1: I was like no, I agree, though, like kind of
Speaker 1: I don't think like we should kill them, but we
Speaker 1: should like figure something out where they like suffer.
Speaker 3: No killing people. I don't know, but like, girl, we
Speaker 3: need to lock you up in a cage, like we
Speaker 3: need to put you in a corner.
Speaker 1: It is so unethical have that amount.
Speaker 2: Of money that might makes no sense.
Speaker 1: Like what are you doing with it? And I understand
Speaker 1: the whole argument, like, well, Jeffrey Besils doesn't actually have
Speaker 1: that money. It's all tied up in stocks. Well, like
Speaker 1: fuck off, Like I don't care.
Speaker 3: He shouldn't have the like capability of like pulling that
Speaker 3: money out. Yeah, if that even makes sense.
Speaker 1: But like literally it's kind of crazy because if he did,
Speaker 1: he would destroy the world. Like if he was just
Speaker 1: like one day like I want to liquidate Amazon and
Speaker 1: sell all my stocks, like it would actually destroy the
Speaker 1: world for a little bit, because like we're so amazon
Speaker 1: ified after the pandemic.
Speaker 3: Like I know, if I would have to like go
Speaker 3: get my cat food, that would destroy me.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I had to leave the house. The house. But yeah,
Speaker 1: billionaires going to space is stupid. And I would have
Speaker 1: loved to watch one of the rockets blow up.
Speaker 2: That would be fucking awesome, But then what would happen?
Speaker 3: Who would take over his awesome?
Speaker 1: Jeffrey Besos stepped down like a month ago or some
Speaker 1: shit like that, Like he stepped down from like I
Speaker 1: don't know, I don't care at all truly, but he
Speaker 1: stepped down as a position, and I had a theory.
Speaker 1: I was like, the rocket's gonna blow out, but he's
Speaker 1: not actually gonna be in the rocket, and he's gonna
Speaker 1: fake his death and like live his life out on
Speaker 1: some like now you.
Speaker 3: Talking about the fucking Shane dossification of conspiracy theories and
Speaker 3: then sitting here talking about jeff Bezos faking his death.
Speaker 1: He would though, like if I was there, I would
Speaker 1: like and then I it's.
Speaker 3: Not like you would. You don't know this, man.
Speaker 5: Yeah, I do. Like we hang out.
Speaker 1: I was on full blown demon mode, like I was
Speaker 1: evil that.
Speaker 5: Yeah.
Speaker 2: We talked about this before about how.
Speaker 1: We it was a purge, like the reason why I
Speaker 1: was like in purgatory mentally for the past three or
Speaker 1: four days was because I've been like hungover. And this
Speaker 1: is why I don't drink often and I can't drink often,
Speaker 1: is because like my hangovers last forever, like they actually
Speaker 1: fuck with my brain chemistry and like make me like
Speaker 1: a zombie of a person. I guess that's literally fucking everybody,
Speaker 1: Like I'm not special, but it lasts for days and
Speaker 1: days and days. But oh my god, I I.
Speaker 5: Was on one.
Speaker 3: I literally didn't have a hangover because I'm a sleigh.
Speaker 3: I literally after drinking, I will come home, shower, wash
Speaker 3: my face, go to bed, wake up, eat Sleigh.
Speaker 1: When I come home after a night of drinking, I
Speaker 1: find rotten watermelons. I break them on the floor of
Speaker 1: the kitchen and put my feet in them and play
Speaker 1: in it. And that's not a joke. We'll add a
Speaker 1: picture and some video. And then I go to the
Speaker 1: most expensive house in LA and try to sneak in
Speaker 1: and almost get my ass beat by the security guards.
Speaker 1: And then I tell everybody pulling up to the party,
Speaker 1: like don't go up there. They're having demon blood orgies,
Speaker 1: like it's really evil, sinister shit, like don't do it.
Speaker 1: And yeah, it's just like really really dark shit, Like
Speaker 1: I don't know what goes on in my brain when
Speaker 1: I'm drunk, but I'm like, I'm a different person.
Speaker 2: I think I just didn't get that.
Speaker 3: Drunk, like.
Speaker 1: I we have free bottles of a zool Like I
Speaker 1: was like literally.
Speaker 3: Chucking that shit. I know, dude, ill, I like, I
Speaker 3: don't I get like the idea of like people like
Speaker 3: pouring shots in someone's mouth and it being like a
Speaker 3: sexy thing. But literally I am not sexy in that way.
Speaker 3: I'm like, don't fucking do that. I'm gonna get acid reflex.
Speaker 3: And I did. Yeah, I literally got asid reflex. I
Speaker 3: was like like about to throw up and I'm like
Speaker 3: thank you.
Speaker 1: Oh my god, like literally like no offense. But I
Speaker 1: was a super spreader that night, Like I like was
Speaker 1: pouring that bottle into everything mouth. Luckily you were first
Speaker 1: and like Denzel was second, but like I was pouring
Speaker 1: it into like everyone's mouth, like anybody who like, oh
Speaker 1: my god, I need to talk about this. But if
Speaker 1: you have like a bottle in the club, like you
Speaker 1: actually get like harassed. Like I was touched in ways
Speaker 1: I can't describe. And it was wrong. It was wrong
Speaker 1: in every sense.
Speaker 5: Of the word.
Speaker 1: What I wanted to say about the Olympics is like
Speaker 1: it acts is fucking hilarious to me. How like we've
Speaker 1: literally been doing this since like the dawn of like
Speaker 1: human consciousness, most like human shit, so primal, Like we
Speaker 1: literally like since the Coliseum, we've just been like fucking
Speaker 1: like flipping around around like running and like chanting for
Speaker 1: our country like that shit's so funny. Like really think
Speaker 1: about it, like we've been like we're just so human,
Speaker 1: you know, Like the Olympics is the most human shit.
Speaker 3: So like primal like animal like animal.
Speaker 1: Instinct to be like competition. Yeah, jump, like I'm better
Speaker 1: than you and I'm gonna prove that I'm better than
Speaker 1: you and I'm the best in the world. And like
Speaker 1: then I watch it and like my animal brain turns
Speaker 1: on and I eat that ship up every time, like
Speaker 1: no matter the event, I'm like yes, like go like
Speaker 1: whin like no matter. And it's also like whoever wins.
Speaker 1: I'm like you you, I knew you were gonna win
Speaker 1: that ship.
Speaker 3: That's your words. I mean You're like, oh, no, I
Speaker 3: knew it. I know, I knew it.
Speaker 2: I was I was thinking about that already, Like.
Speaker 1: I know, I know that's a huge insecurity of mine.
Speaker 1: And every time I say it, I'm like, why did
Speaker 1: I say that? But I literally do, I literally do
Speaker 1: think it, and then before I just don't say it,
Speaker 1: and then you say it or someone else says it. Literally,
Speaker 1: it's a pride thing. I think it. I think it
Speaker 1: stems down to like pride, and I'm like, I wish
Speaker 1: I said that, or like a jealousy thing, because everybody
Speaker 1: got a laugh from it, and I'm like, I wish
Speaker 1: I said that because I did know that, and I
Speaker 1: don't see that.
Speaker 3: You are intelligent and amazing and you should just start
Speaker 3: speaking your mind.
Speaker 1: I do know ple.
Speaker 3: Is because your dumb little ass lets things like balls
Speaker 3: of my mouth come out.
Speaker 2: Instead of other things.
Speaker 3: Instead of saying, like the intellectual thoughts you have, you're
Speaker 3: like balls in my mouth, because.
Speaker 1: It's way better. It's way better. No one wants No
Speaker 1: one wants another smart person. Everybody wants a clown. That
Speaker 1: was deep.
Speaker 3: That was deep, literally mean when I show up to
Speaker 3: the party. But when I show to a party that
Speaker 3: I'm in my too, I'm like, they didn't want another
Speaker 3: hot girl. They wanted a silly girl. Someone made a
Speaker 3: TikTok that really struck in their with me, and they
Speaker 3: were like I used to in life be like I'm
Speaker 3: not the hottest girl, but I'm the funniest girl. And
Speaker 3: then I get on this app and I see the hottest,
Speaker 3: funniest people in the world, and I'm like, oh, so
Speaker 3: there's comb there's literally combo meals out there running around,
Speaker 3: and here I am.
Speaker 1: You can't be both funny and hot. It's not there.
Speaker 1: It's not Yeah, I know. I mean honestly, look at us,
Speaker 1: like we're both touch me, we're both funny and hot.
Speaker 3: I don't I would consider myself like pretty and like
Speaker 3: when I when I put all my driving force into it,
Speaker 3: I could be hot.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I agree, And for me agree, yeah, I think
Speaker 1: you're a hot person, okay, and I want to bed you.
Speaker 1: And for me, everyone calling me hot has done absolutely
Speaker 1: nothing for me. I thought it would be good for me.
Speaker 1: I thought I'd be like, oh, finally like I am attractive,
Speaker 1: but no, like I still think I'm the ugliest.
Speaker 3: Well now now it just sets an expectation. The best
Speaker 3: thing to ever have happened to me was Josh's vlogs
Speaker 3: and seeing how fucking ugly I can look on camera.
Speaker 3: And I was like, Okay, yeah, I don't have to
Speaker 3: be hot all the time, like I am a person.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 3: And I was like that was a very humbling and
Speaker 3: like grounding experience because before that, all the content of
Speaker 3: me was like stuff I had filmed perfect.
Speaker 1: Angles, yeah, like flighting.
Speaker 3: And then like there's specifically one clip of me in
Speaker 3: one of Josh's logs.
Speaker 2: I was like, I am just a person.
Speaker 3: Huh, I'm just a super.
Speaker 2: Man. I was like, that's like billy sometimes.
Speaker 3: I'm not Carly Jenner. Oh, I am for sure, No
Speaker 3: Carly Jenner. I'm silly.
Speaker 1: Who's Carly Jenner?
Speaker 3: I'm a silly billy.
Speaker 1: Who the fuck is Carly Jenner? Your mom, bitch, There's
Speaker 1: no one named Carly Jenner, and my mom's name is
Speaker 1: not Carly Jenner. I'm really confused by this and it's
Speaker 1: starting to irk me. You're so fucking Jenner.
Speaker 4: Shut up.
Speaker 2: I think we're fucking done.
Speaker 1: No, your credit score, oh, I had to day.
Speaker 3: My credit score is awesome.
Speaker 2: It's back to normal.
Speaker 3: Yes, And I just want to say that is further
Speaker 3: proof that that ship is not fucking real. And guess
Speaker 3: what to get it back to normal? I didn't pay
Speaker 3: my goddamn guy in to colleges and I'm not gonna
Speaker 3: pay it.
Speaker 5: That's a lie.
Speaker 1: They really need someone did leave. I'll do it. Someone
Speaker 1: did leave.
Speaker 3: When we were leaving, and I was like, I think
Speaker 3: the house is gonna blow up. I was not kidding,
Speaker 3: and I was like, I was so sure, and I
Speaker 3: came and I jiggled all the knobs to make sure
Speaker 3: they were off, and I was like, I didn't take
Speaker 3: a picture of it, so like it's probably.
Speaker 1: Do you think it was because we, like you cleaned
Speaker 1: and I was like touching all the knobs.
Speaker 3: No, it's just sometimes like it like I get it
Speaker 3: itch in the back of my brain and I'm convinced
Speaker 3: that like I left it on and the house is
Speaker 3: gonna burn and like it's gonna die.
Speaker 1: You should maybe like get that looked at. That's sound healthy, you.
Speaker 3: Like I take color film, Like it shouldn't be that. No,
Speaker 3: the door locking thing is a problem, like it literally
Speaker 3: everyone always makes sun of me that I can't leave
Speaker 3: the house on time, But it's because I have to,
Speaker 3: Like on top of you.
Speaker 1: You wash your hands sixty three times, you have to
Speaker 1: the door three times. You come back and you're like, oh,
Speaker 1: I need to wash my hands because I just locked
Speaker 1: the door. And then you're like, oh, I need to
Speaker 1: go pee because if I have to go pee when
Speaker 1: i'm out, like I had to go in the public
Speaker 1: bathroom and there's germs.
Speaker 3: But it's just like a pro But the public bathroom
Speaker 3: is good if you've eaten me, So you have to
Speaker 3: wash your hands.
Speaker 1: After you eat the not me, not me, not anybody else.
Speaker 3: Not before or after. Never. Men don't wash their hands.
Speaker 1: No, people don't talk about that.
Speaker 2: Men do not wash them and it is so nice.
Speaker 3: No, they're like, I didn't have to wipe.
Speaker 5: I'm like, my penis.
Speaker 1: Literally my penis. I'm sorry, this is gonna be really graphic,
Speaker 1: but my penis goes in mouths like like, I'm I
Speaker 1: don't have to wash my hands after I touch my wiener.
Speaker 1: Like I'm sorry you said mouths because it's like, are
Speaker 1: you cheerating a.
Speaker 2: Mouth like a fucking dishwasher for your dick?
Speaker 3: Like is that what you're leading to right.
Speaker 1: Just saying it's not dirty?
Speaker 3: I hope it's not dirty before goes in something.
Speaker 1: Don't watch this episode, mom.
Speaker 3: Whispering, Mom, that is fucking gross. Men don't wash their
Speaker 3: balls they don't wash their hands.
Speaker 1: I wash my balls and I wash occasionally.
Speaker 3: I wash my hands both getting occasionally I wash my hands.
Speaker 1: No they don't, because no I wash.
Speaker 3: The handstup lasts way too long in our.
Speaker 1: House, I fake wash my hands. I'm gonna be honest.
Speaker 1: I turn on the sink and I make it sound
Speaker 1: like I'm washing my hands in the.
Speaker 2: Room, as if your mom's outside.
Speaker 1: Like literally, no, literally, everybody's done that.
Speaker 3: I swear to god, I have never done that in
Speaker 3: my life. I washed my fucking hands.
Speaker 1: No, actually both because fake washed your hands.
Speaker 5: No.
Speaker 3: Do you know what happens is if I try to
Speaker 3: do a quick wash, I'll get really insecure and I'll
Speaker 3: be like, my hands are so fucking dirty, and I'll
Speaker 3: do like a quick wash and then I'll be like,
Speaker 3: dry my hands off and try to leave the bathroom.
Speaker 3: And then the back of my brain is like, if
Speaker 3: you don't fucking wash your hands right now, you're probab,
Speaker 3: I'm gonna die. And I'm like, oh my god, and
Speaker 3: then I'll turn it.
Speaker 2: I'll like deep.
Speaker 1: Wash those I know there is someone out there watching
Speaker 1: this that has fake washed their hands along with me.
Speaker 1: They just you just turn on the water, you run
Speaker 1: it and then you turn it off, and then you
Speaker 1: leave the room.
Speaker 2: You don't even get like.
Speaker 1: No, you don't even get your hands wet because it's
Speaker 1: annoying because then you have to dry your hands off.
Speaker 2: There's a towel for your hands.
Speaker 1: Yeah, but the towel's dirty because it's been washed a
Speaker 1: hundred times with other hands.
Speaker 3: No, because the hands that are quieting off on the
Speaker 3: towel are clean.
Speaker 1: Have you ever heard of people? Have you ever heard
Speaker 1: of mold? I'm convinced our house is full of mold constantly.
Speaker 1: I swear to god. I watched one fucking video about
Speaker 1: like indoor allergies and mold, and people are like, no, you're.
Speaker 3: So fucking annoying.
Speaker 2: Drew got seasonal allergies and he was like.
Speaker 1: There's mold in the walls because I've never had allergies
Speaker 1: in my entire life. And then all of the sudden
Speaker 1: I come in. I don't have allergies when I'm outside,
Speaker 1: but then I come inside and immediately I have a
Speaker 1: sniffy nose and my nose.
Speaker 3: Ah, fucking room is dusty. When's the last time you
Speaker 3: washed your sheets?
Speaker 1: I don't wash my hands. Do you think I washed
Speaker 1: my sheets. No, I don't wash my wiener. Do you
Speaker 1: think I washed my seats? Guys, this is all jokes.
Speaker 1: This is all jokes. I don't even make that clear.
Speaker 1: Did you know that SpongeBob actually was like filmed in
Speaker 1: the bikini?
Speaker 3: Was practical?
Speaker 5: It was real.
Speaker 1: All of that shit was real. I just don't know
Speaker 1: what camera they filmed on because that shit looked like
Speaker 1: a cartoon, Like, I don't know how the fuck they.
Speaker 2: Did know it was it was the famous kids camera
Speaker 2: off of Amazon.
Speaker 1: Oh really, Yeah, that's actually fucking crazy because I literally
Speaker 1: remember watching that as a kid and was just like remember,
Speaker 1: like I was just like, how the fuck did that
Speaker 1: film make this look?
Speaker 3: And especially underwater and.
Speaker 1: Who's who's the character? Like who's playing?
Speaker 5: Man?
Speaker 3: If I had a heart attack, I like to think
Speaker 3: that like I would trend and that would be like
Speaker 3: a good thing.
Speaker 1: On Twitter for me.
Speaker 3: Yeah. No, I don't have Twitter, so I don't know
Speaker 3: if i'd turn on Twitter, so maybe i'd get like
Speaker 3: a lot of reposts on like ig story.
Speaker 1: Yeah no, I would definitely be I definitely milk your
Speaker 1: death like.
Speaker 3: Crazy, and you have all my premission to do about.
Speaker 1: I honestly don't know how I would react.
Speaker 3: No, I feel like we're not the kind of people
Speaker 3: to like grief publicly like that and intensely, which is
Speaker 3: kind of annoying because like, my lifelong goal is to
Speaker 3: get like as much attention as possible, and the idea
Speaker 3: that like when I pass, my friends won't be like
Speaker 3: but literally on the internet talking about me all the
Speaker 3: time twenty four to seven is kind of annoying, but
Speaker 3: like kind of beautiful because like I know, I'm.
Speaker 1: Like, you're still loved, You're still loved.
Speaker 2: I want public love like people are like, no, that's toxic.
Speaker 3: You shouldn't be like possessive and want people to be
Speaker 3: jealous and like anger you. No, I want all of
Speaker 3: my friends to know that, like if they lost me,
Speaker 3: it would be like the greatest, whether like I just
Speaker 3: stopped being their friends or I sorry, I thought I
Speaker 3: love the front door open if we get if a
Speaker 3: stranger comes in, that's good, whether if it's Josiah or
Speaker 3: a stranger. I don't know how long that cut is
Speaker 3: or how like weird it was, but if it jumped,
Speaker 3: it's because we were getting a knock out the door
Speaker 3: and I thought it was Josiah. And actually pissed me
Speaker 3: off so much because we told him to be quiet,
Speaker 3: and I was ready to go down there and like
Speaker 3: be a mean older sister and be like, what the
Speaker 3: fuck is wrong with me?
Speaker 1: I told you to shut the hell up when you
Speaker 1: came here.
Speaker 3: But it was the mailman. And then this is kind
Speaker 3: of weird. I got a poster delivered, so it was
Speaker 3: like like like a circular object and he did like
Speaker 3: we did have sex and we did use it like
Speaker 3: a dildo, so that was weird, but like all didn't. Yeah,
Speaker 3: we did. No one knows. I was gone for a
Speaker 3: long time.
Speaker 1: You were gone for like seven seconds.
Speaker 3: I'm a quick girl. One of my favorite videos to
Speaker 3: laugh at me because it will never not be funny
Speaker 3: is James Charles.
Speaker 1: Not enough people to talk about that collection of videos,
Speaker 1: but that is actually the best thing, the best content
Speaker 1: he ever made, and the one with him singing with
Speaker 1: the Loez brothers dancing in the background actually disturbing, Like.
Speaker 3: No, that that is also that is a person who
Speaker 3: did all that and then was like in the middle
Speaker 3: of the Grand Canyon singing like.
Speaker 1: I mean, James Charles, like is so effortlessly funny and
Speaker 1: it's unfair because everything he does makes me laugh.
Speaker 3: No, and it's no.
Speaker 7: What makes it so funny is like it's like very serious,
Speaker 7: Like he thought him singing in the middle of that
Speaker 7: canyon was like ethereal, Like it was like it was
Speaker 7: like this is he watched out.
Speaker 2: To you back and he was like, oh, are you
Speaker 2: kidding me? Like that was everything?
Speaker 3: Dude.
Speaker 2: If you can right now literally open up a separate
Speaker 2: tab and look up.
Speaker 3: James Charles, Coachella, Beyonce, that person, I'm not kidding that
Speaker 3: is like the least rhythmically inclined human on this planet,
Speaker 3: I like, and I stand by that.
Speaker 1: Yeah, period, point blank period everything. It's it's just so
Speaker 1: like it's so perfectly imperfec Like there's so so many
Speaker 1: good bad things about it. It's like like I think
Speaker 1: I've said this before, but like I actually enjoy watching
Speaker 1: bad movies more than good movies because like you literally
Speaker 1: don't have to focus on it. You just fucking laugh
Speaker 1: and make fun of it. Yeah, Like that's purely what
Speaker 1: those James Charles dancing videos are for me. Is just
Speaker 1: just like so bad.
Speaker 3: I can't look It's like Coco Melon exactly.
Speaker 1: It turns off my brain.
Speaker 3: I was sitting in class and the principal came up
Speaker 3: and or the vice principal. I think it was a
Speaker 3: vice principle. I fucking hated him, and I hope he
Speaker 3: has like a hemorrorid or something really annoying right now
Speaker 3: because I fucking hate him.
Speaker 1: But he was going to eat that hemorrhoid like a
Speaker 1: jelly bean, bite it off. I love biting hemorrhoids, you
Speaker 1: know what I'm talking about. When you get the haymies,
Speaker 1: their little jelly beans around the edge, you just like
Speaker 1: pull them off, like bite them with your front teeth.
Speaker 1: Leddy hymorrhids.
Speaker 3: No, keep going.
Speaker 1: Them like you were gonna keep going.
Speaker 3: I'm just not gonna say anything. But basically I got
Speaker 3: pulled out of French class and they were like, come
Speaker 3: down to the office, and I was like, what the
Speaker 3: fuck did I do? I go down to the office
Speaker 3: and they have my fucking line playing on the computer
Speaker 3: and I was like, I was like, oh my god.
Speaker 3: And I think someone at the school snitched on me,
Speaker 3: because I was like, I was like, you motherforckers don't
Speaker 3: know about buying.
Speaker 1: Because people by my school.
Speaker 3: Didn't like care about vine. And then I heard through
Speaker 3: the grape Vine that someone had snitched on me, so
Speaker 3: one of the like motherfuckers who like lose were one
Speaker 3: of those nerd ass motherfuckers who worked in the office.
Speaker 2: I was like, bitch, fuck you, you're a hater.
Speaker 3: But yeah, I got suspended for a week. And that's
Speaker 3: actually how my dad found.
Speaker 1: Out about my buying accounty.
Speaker 3: And that was a nightmare because I was like on
Speaker 3: there screaming about Nile Horn being shirtless, being awa like
Speaker 3: a fucking born Berry dude.
Speaker 1: Literally reminded me of probably the most trouble I had
Speaker 1: gotten in in my entire life was from my Twitter account.
Speaker 1: So I like, yeah, I had a reef tank, like
Speaker 1: a coral reef. Like I had a bunch of beautiful coral,
Speaker 1: a bunch of like really expensive fish. Like it was
Speaker 1: like my pride and joy, and they're obviously with that,
Speaker 1: Like you have to like test the water chemistry, so
Speaker 1: like I had this like set of like chemicals that
Speaker 1: like you like get samples of water and you put
Speaker 1: it in there, and it legitimately looks like like breaking
Speaker 1: bad vibes, Like it looks gnarly, it looks like I'm
Speaker 1: making meth with this fucking kit. So like obviously, my
Speaker 1: like young ass fucking fifteen year old brain is like, oh, like,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna make a banger tweet. So I take a
Speaker 1: picture of it and I posted on my Twitter account
Speaker 1: and I'm like cooking meth, bringing some to school tomorrow.
Speaker 1: Who wants it? And like like just like the most
Speaker 1: psych oh ship. And sure enough, I know who fucking
Speaker 1: snitched on me. I'm not gonna say their name, and
Speaker 1: I'm sure they're fucking listening to this because they were
Speaker 1: like my biggest hater fan and they're they're a grown ass,
Speaker 1: fucking man. Bitch, I fucking hate you, and I hope
Speaker 1: your house burns down with your family inside. You know,
Speaker 1: he ruined my life.
Speaker 2: I just literally means to that lady the other name
Speaker 2: for no reason in the car and I was.
Speaker 3: Like, she honked at me and you were like because
Speaker 3: you scared her, and I was like, yeah, I fucking
Speaker 3: scared because she.
Speaker 2: Has two more days to live.
Speaker 3: That bitch and I have like the meanest thing ever. Literally, No,
Speaker 3: we were like at dinner and you started it, bitch.
Speaker 5: Yeah, I was just like I don't I don't know
Speaker 5: how I started, dude.
Speaker 8: You just started it by being really loud about nothing.
Speaker 1: You were just like yeah, I would just like just
Speaker 1: randomly just laugh as loud as possible, like.
Speaker 3: Like really really, it's like not funny to anyone.
Speaker 1: It's like cringey probably, but I just do that really fucking.
Speaker 4: It like makes me crack it.
Speaker 5: It's like BASI too. It's like it's not something you hear,
Speaker 5: it's something you feel like.
Speaker 1: It's it's like a feeling.
Speaker 4: The couple, the older couple next.
Speaker 3: To us, like actually, if anybody has like I could
Speaker 3: probably look this up. And it's like I don't need
Speaker 3: to be asking this. But we went to b CD
Speaker 3: Tofu House and someone put beer into their into their
Speaker 3: rice and I was like, I'm so intrigued by that,
Speaker 3: Like I don't know like why they did that, and
Speaker 3: I didn't ask and I didn't google it because I'm
Speaker 3: a piece of shit and I just like.
Speaker 4: Want to know.
Speaker 8: And if I don't know, then I guess I'll never know.
Speaker 5: I'll never know.
Speaker 3: But me and just making them joke that we were
Speaker 3: like what if we were like so out of touch and.
Speaker 5: Just like I was just like, no, what is that for?
Speaker 5: That looks gross? Why are you doing that? Like just
Speaker 5: like really out.
Speaker 4: Of her like super like toned.
Speaker 3: I'd be like, oh you're not, like you're not supposed
Speaker 3: to be doing that, like actually like and we were
Speaker 3: just like cracking Sorry, my car is literally overriding to
Speaker 3: turn off, and we were just cracking up from that.
Speaker 3: And then oh from us laughing from that. This like
Speaker 3: couple was on like what was very obviously a first
Speaker 3: date and this like maybe a second day, Yeah, maybe
Speaker 3: a second day. And the white girl of the duo
Speaker 3: was like giving us dusters from us, like looking us
Speaker 3: up and down.
Speaker 1: So like we were just like, Okay, we'll fucking look back.
Speaker 1: So we like were making that face or we're just
Speaker 1: like like I was looking at everybody in like I
Speaker 1: was trying to make eye contact with everybody.
Speaker 3: It was so funny when you was scared and you're
Speaker 3: like I literally just looked everyone in here.
Speaker 1: And that no, it was it was crazy like I
Speaker 1: had never felt the way I felt that nice. And
Speaker 1: I was like making full eye contact with people and
Speaker 1: like like like looking them up and down like.
Speaker 5: And they were probably like, dude, who is this? Why
Speaker 5: are they judging me like this?
Speaker 3: For some reason, we were hella focus on the TV,
Speaker 3: like like if we weren't doing that.
Speaker 4: We were dead silent watching TV and all the TV
Speaker 4: was commercials for the restaurant.
Speaker 5: We were in Celebrities BCD.
Speaker 3: TOFU but basically, and then Drew's doing that, and I
Speaker 3: like to him, I was like, what if I did this?
Speaker 8: But I just ended up doing it anyway. I was like, no,
Speaker 8: but what if I did this? And like she was
Speaker 8: sitting here next to me, and I like turned and
Speaker 8: I was like.
Speaker 4: And like turned by.
Speaker 5: Like you looked her up and down.
Speaker 4: She was gonna be like, they're fucking bullies.
Speaker 5: No, but she they were.
Speaker 1: I will say she was really pretty, like she was, yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: she was really pretty, but like she just gave an energy,
Speaker 1: Like she just gave an off energy, and like she's
Speaker 1: really angry.
Speaker 3: Like excuse it, something's wrong with this fucking stranger, Like
Speaker 3: they don't find us being like obnoxiously annoying.
Speaker 8: And also we were like talking so loud.
Speaker 5: We were being like there's no excuse for our behavior.
Speaker 1: And if you were there, like I'm wholeheartedly, wholeheartedly sorry
Speaker 1: that you experienced the wrath of Drewin and you know,
Speaker 1: like on one, but like we mean no harm by it,
Speaker 1: Like we love you like.
Speaker 8: Yeah, I'm sorry if you're ever caught in the crossfire.
Speaker 8: Just no, like it's fun.
Speaker 5: You can talk about us, like we give you full permission.
Speaker 8: Yeah, everyone can talk about us.
Speaker 4: Call us annoying. We know we are, and.
Speaker 5: At the end of the day, like I love myself. Guys,
Speaker 5: if we should kiss in one episode, let us know.
Speaker 3: That's why I'm okay with being a bitter, fucking hater
Speaker 3: because I know a lot of times I'm projecting it.
Speaker 9: I'm a piece of shit and I'm a oh, look
Speaker 9: that's sweet.
Speaker 5: They're picking it up. Oh no, they just kicked it, assholes.
Speaker 5: Oh they're gonna smoke on the roof.
Speaker 4: I'm literally like, where are they going? They look like
Speaker 4: they fucking stink.
Speaker 5: Okay, they saw it. That was real. That was real.
Speaker 5: That was us in lifetime being bitter bullies.
Speaker 4: That on purpose, Like.
Speaker 3: They literally do look like they stink. They are like
Speaker 3: two white dudes with flip flops, like you're.
Speaker 8: Wearing thong sandals out as a man.
Speaker 3: You need to go to fuck it there, you need
Speaker 3: to figure I know your ship stinks. I know you
Speaker 3: don't cut your tone notes, and I know your ship
Speaker 3: stinks period, Like I know you smell like balls.
Speaker 5: Just wear slides, please, just wear slides. Please.
Speaker 1: Also men and men, and has a lot of opinions
Speaker 1: on men loving themselves taking care of Okay, I.
Speaker 3: Can't be the only person straight men like feeling themselves
Speaker 3: to taking pictures of them stuff.
Speaker 9: I'm like, why are you doing that like that?
Speaker 4: Like I not to.
Speaker 3: I like want a man who is like confident and
Speaker 3: like likes himself. But I'm like, if I'm driving us
Speaker 3: around and I look over and you're taking a fucking
Speaker 3: selfie because the sun is on you or something, I'm
Speaker 3: crashing the car.
Speaker 5: I'm crashing.
Speaker 1: I'm crashing it, and I'm blaming I'm unbuckling your seat crashing.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I'm unbuckling your seatbelt and getting us in a
Speaker 3: t bone accident. Because you shouldn't be doing that, like
Speaker 3: like you don't have like the fucking New York Times
Speaker 3: app to be looking at Like why are you looking
Speaker 3: at your play chess?
Speaker 5: Play chess?
Speaker 8: Actually, don't be on your phone. I also can't stand
Speaker 8: like a man who's on his phone so much, like
Speaker 8: what do you have going on there?
Speaker 3: I wish I was kidding, like I was in the
Speaker 3: car with like I've just been in situations with like
Speaker 3: men and I'm like, I literally will I be like,
Speaker 3: why are you on the phone so much?
Speaker 4: Like I'm like you were so not even that.
Speaker 3: I'm like you were so embarrassing, like you don't want
Speaker 3: to look outside and like be like what is in LA?
Speaker 5: We weren't driving around a concrete jungle.
Speaker 4: Con New York, idiot.
Speaker 5: See if you look at that, motherfucker?
Speaker 3: Also maybe like again I'm projecting because I get carsick
Speaker 3: and I can't look at the You're.
Speaker 5: Jealous and you're jealous of what I can do.
Speaker 4: No, you just like as like why are you looking?
Speaker 4: Like what is on there?
Speaker 8: Stop?
Speaker 5: You're literally I'm not kidding.
Speaker 4: Men should have burners, Like you don't need an iPhone?
Speaker 4: What do you need an iPhone for?
Speaker 3: If you want to post on ig way too you
Speaker 3: get home, go have an iPod Touch, Go have an
Speaker 3: iPad when.
Speaker 1: You're burner in your iPod touch with no service? If
Speaker 1: you have a phone with service. As a straight man.
Speaker 9: No, like what are you up to?
Speaker 4: Like no good? Like you're up to no good?
Speaker 5: On that you're either yeah.
Speaker 8: You're sexting someone and I don't.
Speaker 5: Like to say you're you're sexting someone.
Speaker 4: No, I just don't like it. It's so gross.
Speaker 1: But yeah, I could go on for day and goes
Speaker 1: on for days in days and days and a.
Speaker 8: Lot of opinions about like man, I'm like, oh.
Speaker 1: You should like you shouldn't love yourself, that's what shes.
Speaker 3: No, Like you should be confident, but don't take like
Speaker 3: when a man stops someone the other.
Speaker 1: No, I won't.
Speaker 3: I can't be the only person straight. Men like feeling
Speaker 3: themselves are taking pictures of them stuff.
Speaker 9: I'm like, why are you doing that like that?
Speaker 4: Like I not to.
Speaker 3: I like want a man who is like confident and
Speaker 3: like likes himself. But I'm like, if I'm driving us
Speaker 3: around and I look over and you're taking a fucking
Speaker 3: selfie because this.
Speaker 8: Is on you or something, I'm crashing in the car.
Speaker 5: I'm crashing.
Speaker 4: I'm crashing it, and I'm blaming.
Speaker 5: I'm unbuckling your seat crashing.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I'm unbuckling your seatbelt and getting us in a
Speaker 3: t bone attiday Because you shouldn't be doing that, like
Speaker 3: like you don't have like the fucking New York Times
Speaker 3: app to be looking at like why are you.
Speaker 5: Looking at your play chess play chess.
Speaker 8: Actually, don't be on your phone. I also can't stand
Speaker 8: like a man who's on.
Speaker 9: His phone so much, like what do you have going on?
Speaker 2: There?
Speaker 5: Are texting?
Speaker 4: I wish I was kidding, like I was.
Speaker 3: In the car with like I've just been in situations
Speaker 3: with like men and I'm like, I literally will I
Speaker 3: be like why are you on the phone so much?
Speaker 4: Like I'm like you were so not even that.
Speaker 3: I'm like you were so embarrassing, like you don't want
Speaker 3: to look outside.
Speaker 8: And like be like what is look at in LA
Speaker 8: We weren't driving around.
Speaker 5: A concrete jungle.
Speaker 8: Con ju New York idiot.
Speaker 5: See if you look at that? Motherfucker?
Speaker 8: Also maybe like again I'm projecting because I get carsick.
Speaker 8: I can't look at the You're.
Speaker 5: Jealous and you're jealous of what I can do.
Speaker 8: No, you just like as like why the are you looking?
Speaker 4: Like what is on there?
Speaker 8: Stop?
Speaker 5: You're literally I am not kidding.
Speaker 4: Men should have burners, Like you don't need an iPhone?
Speaker 4: What do you need an iPhone for?
Speaker 8: If you want to post on ig way too you
Speaker 8: get home, go have an iPod Touch, Go.
Speaker 1: Have an iPad When you're burner in your iPod Touch
Speaker 1: with no service, if you have a phone with service
Speaker 1: as a straight man.
Speaker 9: No, like, what are you up to?
Speaker 4: Like no good?
Speaker 3: Like you're up to no good on that you're either yeah,
Speaker 3: you're sexting someone.
Speaker 1: And I don't like to say you're you're sexting someone.
Speaker 4: No, I just don't like it. It's so gross. But yeah,
Speaker 4: I could go on for days.
Speaker 5: And goes on for days in days and.
Speaker 8: Days and a lot of opinions about like man, I'm like, oh, you.
Speaker 1: Should like you shouldn't love yourself, that's what shes No, Like.
Speaker 8: You should be confident, but don't take like when a
Speaker 8: man stops someone.
Speaker 4: The other No, I won't.
Speaker 5: I will say it is really cringey.
Speaker 1: Oh my god, here I go like, I'm sorry, hypocritical,
Speaker 1: It is just like something out.
Speaker 3: No, there's something a little funky about a man who's
Speaker 3: like posting a lot of pictures of himself.
Speaker 8: I'm like, a man's i G.
Speaker 4: A straight man's i.
Speaker 9: G shouldn't just be pictures of himself.
Speaker 4: I'm like, something's going.
Speaker 1: On here, Like, well, as a straight man, my i
Speaker 1: G is a picture myself as a straight man.
Speaker 3: So now we're just saying things okay, as a politician, Like, yeah,
Speaker 3: I just like you didn't see something on your walk
Speaker 3: you want to.
Speaker 1: Post, like you see the magnolia tree that you could
Speaker 1: take a picture of the magnolia tree. Say it smells
Speaker 1: like pussy. He smells like pussy out here, and it's
Speaker 1: a magnolia tree. Y'all know what I'm talking about. The
Speaker 1: pussy willows.
Speaker 8: No, they smell like a sneeze. They smell like com
Speaker 8: They smell like common sneezes.
Speaker 5: Tomatoes tastes like com that.
Speaker 3: You can't keep saying that because every day my like
Speaker 3: my go to like right now anywhere I go, like
Speaker 3: no matter where I am, I get or I make
Speaker 3: it myself a soft scrambled eggs, avocado, and slices of tomatoes.
Speaker 9: Like it's like all I will eat right now.
Speaker 3: And Drew said that the other day and I literally
Speaker 3: was eating my breakfast and I wanted to throw up
Speaker 3: because I chewed on the tomato for too long and
Speaker 3: I was like really getting into it.
Speaker 1: It's like it's like when you when if you're eating
Speaker 1: like red meat, you.
Speaker 8: Can we always talk about cocking balls and pussy on here.
Speaker 4: We always make.
Speaker 1: It it start tasting the farm when you're eating like red
Speaker 1: meat and also yeah, just like they we know it's
Speaker 1: just a big part of our life.
Speaker 5: Cockballs and pussy.
Speaker 4: No, we are just like weird.
Speaker 5: I can't say I literally the word the pea words.
Speaker 4: Uncomfortable.
Speaker 8: Yeah, okay, man with a straight Instagram.
Speaker 5: I'm straight as hell. Meats your girlfriend? I can't.
Speaker 8: This is my girlfriend, Yeah, this is my yeah, no,
Speaker 8: this is my boyfriend.
Speaker 4: That's like chill.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I am straight and don't get a fucking twisted. Yeah, absolutely,
Speaker 3: I got my eye.
Speaker 8: But yeah, we always bring it to coconball somehow.
Speaker 4: But I think that's it for the episode. Maybe we
Speaker 4: don't have to talk about cocon balls anymore.
Speaker 9: We can just shut up.
Speaker 1: I literally have red bull in my fucking eye. I'm
Speaker 1: curious to see if, maybe one day, if I'm ready
Speaker 1: enough and all that trauma from those terrible trips is gone,
Speaker 1: if I can just like eat a meal and then
Speaker 1: smoke and see if it's all good.
Speaker 3: Yeah, that's actually another thing I always eat before. Like
Speaker 3: I'll be with someone who like enjoys smoking weed and
Speaker 3: then they'll be like, oh my god, I'm gonna smoke
Speaker 3: and then we should order food, and I'm like, no,
Speaker 3: I'm getting food in me and then I can like
Speaker 3: maybe join.
Speaker 1: But maybe I'll have a midnight snack MUNCHIESE munchies if
Speaker 1: you can't until I feel fucking batshit crazy today, I
Speaker 1: don't feel normal. My most recent bad weed experience was
Speaker 1: when I was back in Texas and I was like
Speaker 1: laying on the couch watching TV and I just had
Speaker 1: the gnarliest thoughts about like like we were watching Netflix
Speaker 1: and I was watching these shows on Netflix and I
Speaker 1: was like, I was like, no, this is like garbage TV,
Speaker 1: Like we're watching garbage TV. And then we watched I
Speaker 1: was like, I was like, we have to turn this off.
Speaker 1: We have to turn this episode off, like or we
Speaker 1: have to turn the show off because it's literally like
Speaker 1: it was made by aliens to like keep us like
Speaker 1: down like or some like crazy like freaked out like
Speaker 1: like thought process. So we switched it and we put
Speaker 1: on this like magic show and it was like this
Speaker 1: dude doing this, but it was like it was so
Speaker 1: confusing because it was like this dude doing magic, but
Speaker 1: I couldn't tell if it was like a joke or
Speaker 1: if it was real or what. And I just kept
Speaker 1: saying that out loud and I kept like audibly being
Speaker 1: like no, no, like no, like turn this off. And
Speaker 1: I just kept going into these thoughts about like how
Speaker 1: like like this is gonna like I literally sound psycho,
Speaker 1: but I was like, dude, like TV is made to
Speaker 1: like keep the population at bay, like like just like
Speaker 1: the most that's what everybody thought like the eighties. Yeah, exactly,
Speaker 1: like the most smoked thoughts you can ever have. And
Speaker 1: I was like, this is why I don't do like,
Speaker 1: this is why I don't smoke or take edibles because
Speaker 1: I literally like cannot remember like the last good experience
Speaker 1: I had. And even like like I don't know, I
Speaker 1: don't know, I don't care, but like literally I could
Speaker 1: just go on it, shut the fuck up whatever. But
Speaker 1: I'm like not anti weed because I know it does
Speaker 1: help a lot of people, but like for me personally,
Speaker 1: I'm like it's it was made by the devil, like literally,
Speaker 1: and it's trying to kill me constantly.
Speaker 3: You're like, it's trying to kill me when the only
Speaker 3: person to go put it in you is you?
Speaker 1: Exactly, No, the weed it controls people.
Speaker 2: I think.
Speaker 5: Fuck.
Speaker 2: I was just thinking, Oh, that reminded me of when.
Speaker 3: I went to Texas for like that fun party we
Speaker 3: went to what was that party?
Speaker 2: I went to Texas for.
Speaker 1: My brother's funeral. That was the event of the year.
Speaker 3: You could eat anything when you're famished, and you might
Speaker 3: as well be eating out of Michelin stub bit. You
Speaker 3: could feed me the seven eleven like rotisserie talk like
Speaker 3: taquitos when I'm hungry, and I'll be.
Speaker 1: Like, this is the best food ever. But I will
Speaker 1: say those are the best food probably ever made.
Speaker 3: I never had the takitos, but I used to fuck
Speaker 3: up the chicken wings. But I was like the chicken
Speaker 3: wing monster.
Speaker 1: We just had this conversation like two days ago. But like,
Speaker 1: I can't do bone in meat at all, like boner meat.
Speaker 5: Eh, I can't.
Speaker 1: I can't do bone and meat because when you're eating,
Speaker 1: when you when you're eating, the sucking the bone, yeah, exactly.
Speaker 1: It's a little gay, Like I can't do that. I
Speaker 1: can't suck bones. No, because like when you're eating bone
Speaker 1: and meat, one it's on the bone, which I shouldn't
Speaker 1: fucking see bones ever in my life. That's so sinister
Speaker 1: until the tendons, uh uh, the tendons in the fat.
Speaker 1: When you buy into that shit, it is like eating
Speaker 1: fucking rubber bands, like the.
Speaker 2: Best taste ever.
Speaker 3: That's why I love like squid and octopus and like
Speaker 3: oxtail and like pigs feet because it's all like batty
Speaker 3: like like tendons and it's like it's the most.
Speaker 1: It literally is like a cultural thing I think, actually though,
Speaker 1: but no.
Speaker 2: I literally like that is what.
Speaker 3: Makes me like in the most, Like let me clarify,
Speaker 3: this is the most.
Speaker 1: Joe Rogan shit you'll ever say.
Speaker 3: I am not vegetarian because I'm like, yeah, like save
Speaker 3: the planet, Like of course, I'm like, yes, I do
Speaker 3: my part.
Speaker 2: But I am in any any like health thing I'm in.
Speaker 3: It's for vanity and like that's it purely.
Speaker 2: Never get it twisted.
Speaker 3: Like I don't have a hydroflask because I'm like, don't
Speaker 3: waste plastic. I have a hydroflast because if I don't
Speaker 3: have a hydroflask, I won't drink water and then I won't.
Speaker 2: Be pretty, Like I like, of course, like God blessed.
Speaker 3: That I'm like helping the world while I try to
Speaker 3: be pretty in like little ways. Yeah, but it it
Speaker 3: is never like I'm not skipping out on straws, like
Speaker 3: I will take a straw because I don't want my
Speaker 3: teeth to be yellow.
Speaker 1: Also, straws aren't the things that are killing the turtles.
Speaker 1: The things that are killing the turtles are fucking nuts.
Speaker 3: And a lot of people would be like, oh my god,
Speaker 3: did you switch from making cancel overfishing because you saw that. No,
Speaker 3: I'm sorry, Like that is not my duty, Like that's
Speaker 3: not my job.
Speaker 1: It's a corporation's job. We need to it's the scientist's
Speaker 1: job to figure out how to get us live drugs.
Speaker 1: Would you eat lab grown meat?
Speaker 3: Yeah, because that's what like plant based meat is. That's
Speaker 3: basically like lab grown.
Speaker 1: Would you know?
Speaker 2: Would I take lab grown meat.
Speaker 1: In my whole No, it was basically what I was
Speaker 1: gonna say. I was gonna say. I can't say it
Speaker 1: because it's just so gnarly. It's really it's really naughty.
Speaker 1: Should I just say it?
Speaker 5: Would you?
Speaker 1: I mean, that's a test too.
Speaker 3: Big, because lab grown pussy would.
Speaker 1: Hit like alien, like alien alien versus predator puss.
Speaker 3: I guess actually, lab grown dick would literally they can
Speaker 3: make it through the twirls that the little and.
Speaker 1: It could suck like they could. We could add a
Speaker 1: little attached.
Speaker 3: Meat you could shape it like the rabbit toys and
Speaker 3: give it like an extra mouth to be like I
Speaker 3: won't go.
Speaker 1: Yeah, you can tell a lot about a person.
Speaker 3: If they put the cart back.
Speaker 1: Yeah yeah, that like that's like really says all you
Speaker 1: need to know. There's another one of those where it's like, okay,
Speaker 1: like if you put your cart back, you're like a
Speaker 1: fairly like moral person. You care about the well being
Speaker 1: of others. But if you like leave it in the
Speaker 1: middle of the thing, you literally don't give a ship
Speaker 1: and you're a narcissist and you care about yourself and
Speaker 1: no one else.
Speaker 3: But there's a rush.
Speaker 1: But yeah, but I mean like I've been in rush
Speaker 1: situations and I always put.
Speaker 3: Oh no, you're like the most moral rounded person ever.
Speaker 1: Keep going though I t you like, thank you, thank you.
Speaker 1: I feel like I am so thank you. No, there's
Speaker 1: another one where it's like.
Speaker 3: You were gonna say something stupid. You were literally gonna
Speaker 3: say something so fucking stupid. No, go, what were you
Speaker 3: gonna say?
Speaker 1: As a man, it's my duty to make the girl
Speaker 1: come four times. That's just a line, like it's the
Speaker 1: type of person I am.
Speaker 3: You know, Oh you're so nice, you make girls square
Speaker 3: and stuff. You make sure your girl squirts.
Speaker 1: Yeah, we should just talk about how we miss the
Speaker 1: first two weeks of Lockdown.
Speaker 5: We should move on.
Speaker 1: But like a Zola is eating my goddamn plant. Motherfucker
Speaker 1: she was is she did? She chomp on it big time. No,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna fucking kill myself. Actually, I'm gonna fucking kill myself.
Speaker 1: Like this is actually like the saddest day of my
Speaker 1: goddamn life.
Speaker 3: Oh is it bad?
Speaker 1: Yes, we're leaving the same.
Speaker 3: The worst.
Speaker 2: We'll just keep it here for the rest of the episode.
Speaker 2: We'll watch her.
Speaker 1: I'm gonna fucking vomit.
Speaker 2: True wells. Also, so that's the good news.
Speaker 1: Dude, Oh my god, he ate no, and yet this
Speaker 1: is all him, That's all him. He was eating the
Speaker 1: funk out of that like a fucking snail. He's getting spankings.
Speaker 1: I'm not kidding. IM gonna spank the ship out of him.
Speaker 3: I'm so sorry. How much was this way too much?
Speaker 2: I'm so sorry.
Speaker 3: I'm gonna get a spray to like spray around that
Speaker 3: air of the couch so that it's all good.
Speaker 1: It shouldn't have been there anyways, Like I knew he
Speaker 1: was gonna do but that motherfucker
Speaker 3: M