WEBVTT - Best Of Dear Chelsea: Alex Cooper

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<v Speaker 1>Hi, Catherine, I love Chelsea together.

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<v Speaker 2>Oh my god, it's Los Angeles and it's raining and

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<v Speaker 2>the whole everything is sliding down the hill. I love

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<v Speaker 2>the fucking rain, and I know it's not safe. Yeah,

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<v Speaker 2>but I fucking love when it rained.

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<v Speaker 3>It's I love it too, But like this fourth week,

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<v Speaker 3>I was like, I'm a little over it.

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<v Speaker 1>I'm all done with us.

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<v Speaker 2>I'm not, but I understand it's not good for Californians

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<v Speaker 2>and that people are and obviously it's a serious dangerous situation.

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<v Speaker 1>So I obviously don't love the rain.

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<v Speaker 2>And if I had to choose to have the rain

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<v Speaker 2>or not have the rain, I would have to choose

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<v Speaker 2>to not have the rain.

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<v Speaker 4>But then we're in a drought, Chelsea, I.

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<v Speaker 2>Know, but I just enjoy the sound of the pitter

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<v Speaker 2>pattern and I just it's so much moodier and it's

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<v Speaker 2>like cozy.

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<v Speaker 1>I love it so much. It makes me I just

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<v Speaker 1>you know. Anyway, Hi, what's happening. What's news?

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<v Speaker 3>Well, we got to see all of the gals from

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<v Speaker 3>my Yorca that we went to.

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<v Speaker 1>My God, right, I couldn't go when was it? Because

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<v Speaker 1>I was Friday?

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<v Speaker 2>Well, I had the Critics' Choice Awards so we had

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<v Speaker 2>rehearsals Friday for that.

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<v Speaker 4>Was so excited.

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<v Speaker 1>How did that go?

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<v Speaker 5>Oh?

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<v Speaker 4>Was amazing?

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<v Speaker 1>I loved it. I love dressing up like a little

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<v Speaker 1>Barbie doll. You in that red dress is everything? Yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>it was actually hot pink.

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<v Speaker 2>It was like the color of your of your hair amazing,

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<v Speaker 2>well parts of the color of your hair, like this little.

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<v Speaker 1>Strand up here. Yes, Yeah, it was really fun.

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<v Speaker 2>We had such a good time, my writers and I

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<v Speaker 2>that helped write the monologue or well and everybody there

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<v Speaker 2>and then we went out after and yeah, it was

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<v Speaker 2>really fun.

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<v Speaker 1>I had a great night. I'm so happy. Yeah, it

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<v Speaker 1>was fun to do actually good. Yeah.

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<v Speaker 2>Usually I don't like to do things like that because

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<v Speaker 2>I'm like, oh, it's going to be a paint and ass.

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<v Speaker 1>Plus it was interrupting my you know.

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<v Speaker 2>Christmas ski skilar But you know, I just understood that

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<v Speaker 2>I'm I'm gonna have to not we have to say

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<v Speaker 2>yes to work when I yeah, when I had knowing

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<v Speaker 2>I have to learn how to not take four months off.

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<v Speaker 4>Yeah, well we'll send you back right.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, I'm going back pretty good.

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<v Speaker 2>I'm actually marrying my makeup artist from New York Mia.

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<v Speaker 2>I'm marrying her tomorrow to someone else, so to her fiance,

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<v Speaker 2>and I am the officiant for their wedding God's And

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<v Speaker 2>I'm not sure how that happened exactly, but she told

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<v Speaker 2>me this weekend. Last week I was in New York

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<v Speaker 2>doing some press. She told me that she assumed that

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<v Speaker 2>I have married a bunch of people already. And I

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<v Speaker 2>looked at her, and my sister was with us at

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<v Speaker 2>dinner or shashana, and we both looked at her and thought,

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<v Speaker 2>have you been listening to anything I've ever said?

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<v Speaker 1>Why would you think that I marry a lot of people?

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<v Speaker 1>You know?

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<v Speaker 3>I can kind of see it as an extension of

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<v Speaker 3>like you get a lot of gay couples engaged at

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<v Speaker 3>your shows and things, right, and yeah.

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<v Speaker 2>But like this is a bigger level of responsibility. So Casey,

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<v Speaker 2>who is an assistant, he got me officiated online amazing,

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<v Speaker 2>and now I'm an efficient I can marry people. So

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<v Speaker 2>please don't put in requests because it's not happening. I'm

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<v Speaker 2>not doing this again. This is a one off.

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<v Speaker 1>Oh my gosh, are you are you are?

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<v Speaker 2>I'm an officiat. Yes, I'm a shaman, I'm a gycologist.

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<v Speaker 2>I'm a shaman. I'm a reverend. A reverend is good.

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<v Speaker 2>That's kind of like my speed great. I mean I'm

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<v Speaker 2>just fucking preaching gospel basically all the time.

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<v Speaker 4>Right, yes, so many gospels.

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<v Speaker 3>So, Chelsea, we recorded this episode with our very fantastic

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<v Speaker 3>guest a couple of weeks ago, and you were a

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<v Speaker 3>little under the weather. So just so people know, that's

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<v Speaker 3>why your voice sounds a little different.

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<v Speaker 2>Before I introduced our guest today, I want to say

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<v Speaker 2>that I was on a plane. I was flying back

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<v Speaker 2>from Boston, and I smoked a lot of pop because

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<v Speaker 2>I was tending to my sister who had surgery and

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<v Speaker 2>I was being a nurse and that was stressful for Chelsea,

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<v Speaker 2>so she smoked a lot of pot. And then I

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<v Speaker 2>have a very sensitive throat, so I started coughing and

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<v Speaker 2>I was like, okay, forget it. Then I had shows

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<v Speaker 2>and on the East Coast I got on the plane

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<v Speaker 2>Monday on Jet Blue. Thank god I had my own

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<v Speaker 2>little cubbyhole area, because I deteriorated on that plane ride

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<v Speaker 2>like I had full blown aids. I mean I was shivering,

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<v Speaker 2>my back was thumping, I was I was like packing

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<v Speaker 2>up a storm. Of course, I had a mask on

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<v Speaker 2>because I'm not a Republican, and I just was like,

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<v Speaker 2>oh my god, I'm they may have to ground the

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<v Speaker 2>plane and take me straight to the emergency room in.

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<v Speaker 1>Du Boy or wherever we were flying over.

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<v Speaker 2>And I got off the plane went straight My driver

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<v Speaker 2>drove me straight to my doctor's office. He goes, don't

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<v Speaker 2>come inside. Meet me in the alleyway because he's like,

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<v Speaker 2>I have to test you for RSB, COVID and the

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<v Speaker 2>flu that's going around. I'm like, I had the flu shot.

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<v Speaker 2>He goes, it doesn't matter, everyone's got it anyway. I

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<v Speaker 2>ended up having the flu. I'm on my fifth day antibiotics,

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<v Speaker 2>so I'm no longer infectious, which is upsetting for me

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<v Speaker 2>because I wanted to give you something when you got here.

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<v Speaker 6>Well, I have something, so I'm gonna give it to you.

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<v Speaker 1>Okay, what do you have?

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<v Speaker 6>I'm just kidding. I'm kidding. I actually got COVID for

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<v Speaker 6>the first time the other week.

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<v Speaker 1>Oh you did? Was that after I saw you at

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<v Speaker 1>that party? Yeah?

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<v Speaker 6>Yeah, I got it from you. You gave me the mushrooms.

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<v Speaker 6>Your friend gave me the mushroom. Oh yeah, she gave

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<v Speaker 6>my boyfriend the mushroom. Okay, this is Alex xanre Cooper. Everybody.

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<v Speaker 2>Okay, you know her from Call Her Daddy, which is

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<v Speaker 2>the number one podcast in.

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<v Speaker 1>All of the globe.

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<v Speaker 2>Okay, it's probably more popular than Joe Rogan's.

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<v Speaker 6>Podcast I Need to Hang Out with You more.

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<v Speaker 2>And she put herself on the map in a major,

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<v Speaker 2>major way. Because you know what's so funny. The first

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<v Speaker 2>time I met Alexandra, I didn't know who the fuck

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<v Speaker 2>she was, and I.

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<v Speaker 6>Would let me know it.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, well, my publicists were like, you have to go

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<v Speaker 2>do Alexandra Cooper's podcast. It's the biggest podcast in the world.

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<v Speaker 2>She just got this huge podcast deal. Blah blah blah blah.

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<v Speaker 2>I go, sure, whatever, and I go to her house

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<v Speaker 2>and the whole time she's like, do you even.

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<v Speaker 1>Know who I am? I'm like, well, I mean no,

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<v Speaker 1>but stop saying that. Like, I can't lie. I'm not

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<v Speaker 1>gonna pretend.

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<v Speaker 6>I was like the awkward girl who was like fangirling

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<v Speaker 6>that Chelsea Hammer.

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<v Speaker 2>I was stoned. I had my sunglasses on. I was like, listen, girl,

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<v Speaker 2>we can't we don't have time for this fangirl. Like,

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<v Speaker 2>let's get down to business. And then throughout the hour,

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<v Speaker 2>I was like, oh, okay, can see why this girl

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<v Speaker 2>is popular and she's fun. And then I've been able

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<v Speaker 2>to watch your success and run into you a few times,

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<v Speaker 2>and I do really like you.

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<v Speaker 6>Thank you. I like you too.

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<v Speaker 1>You're in a.

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<v Speaker 2>Very very solid relationship, you said the other night when

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<v Speaker 2>I saw you at the Amphire event.

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<v Speaker 1>For two years.

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<v Speaker 6>Right, it's shocking. I'm so proud of myself.

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<v Speaker 1>I'm proud of you.

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<v Speaker 6>It's been good because the toxicity was running through my

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<v Speaker 6>veins in college and out of college in New York City,

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<v Speaker 6>like I was just trying to ruin guys live. And

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<v Speaker 6>then I got over it and I was like, toxic

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<v Speaker 6>is now actually boring to me because it's the same

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<v Speaker 6>thing every time. And then I found healthy and it's good.

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<v Speaker 1>How did you find that?

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<v Speaker 6>I found that because I feel like I was just ready,

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<v Speaker 6>Like I wouldn't have been ready if it I wouldn't

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<v Speaker 6>have found healthy if I wasn't healthy. I got into

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<v Speaker 6>fucking therapy.

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<v Speaker 1>Well there's the answer for all of us, right, Yeah.

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<v Speaker 6>It sometimes you don't want to be in therapy because

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<v Speaker 6>you're like I want to keep spiraling, like this is

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<v Speaker 6>better for content, this is better just for me, and

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<v Speaker 6>generally keep living in the dark, and then I woke

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<v Speaker 6>up and I was like, all right, I guess it's

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<v Speaker 6>time twenty eight I figured out, Well that's good.

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<v Speaker 2>I mean, listen, I didn't figure my shit out until

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<v Speaker 2>I was like forty. But I think when you're an

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<v Speaker 2>artist or a creative, you think all the bad shit

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<v Speaker 2>is helpful for your material.

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<v Speaker 1>Like I remember doing stand up and anytime I.

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<v Speaker 2>Broke up with somebody is when I was just crushing

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<v Speaker 2>it because I could just go off on that relationship.

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<v Speaker 2>And then you've come to a point where you're like, well,

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<v Speaker 2>no one's gonna date me anymore. And then you're like,

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<v Speaker 2>but who gives a fuck? Because I don't want to

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<v Speaker 2>date anybody anyway. But then you know, you come to

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<v Speaker 2>grips with the idea that like it's so exhausting to

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<v Speaker 2>be in something that requires so much energy. You know, like, yeah,

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<v Speaker 2>you don't need drama or bad shit or toxicity in

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<v Speaker 2>your life to create good stuff.

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<v Speaker 1>You can do that.

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<v Speaker 2>It's like when fat comedians lose weight and they're like,

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<v Speaker 2>well are they still going to be funny? You're like,

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<v Speaker 2>what are you talking about?

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<v Speaker 1>Right?

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<v Speaker 6>Like that's their only bit?

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<v Speaker 2>Like you're like, you got funny because you're fat. That's

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<v Speaker 2>not the way it works anyway. So tell us a

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<v Speaker 2>little bit about your, for lack of a better word,

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<v Speaker 2>journey into podcasting, into the situation that you're in, Like,

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<v Speaker 2>how did everything start to wapping?

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<v Speaker 1>If you excuse me.

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<v Speaker 6>Oh my god, I just got the flu and COVID

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<v Speaker 6>at the same time. Chelsea just looked me dead in

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<v Speaker 6>the eyes. We made eye contact, and she just burped

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<v Speaker 6>a cough onto you, guys.

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<v Speaker 2>I have to be completely honest. I'm wearing a Maxie

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<v Speaker 2>shield right now because I cough. This cough I have

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<v Speaker 2>is so bad that I said to my housekeeper, and

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<v Speaker 2>we only speak Spanish, I'm like tenemos Maxi shields.

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<v Speaker 6>Now, you know what she sounds like. It's when you

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<v Speaker 6>have like a cough coming and you're holding your breath

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<v Speaker 6>in your throat and you're trying to talk. It's been

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<v Speaker 6>since I walked into the room. So why don't I

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<v Speaker 6>just podcast? You sit over there, you.

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<v Speaker 1>Just take a little break. You I want a Maxi pad.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah I haven't, and I fuck is it's fucking disgusting.

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<v Speaker 2>And every time I was out, I was getting my

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<v Speaker 2>color done last night and I coughed so hard and

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<v Speaker 2>then I got up.

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<v Speaker 1>I was like, ugh, is that urine dripping down my leg?

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<v Speaker 1>And I got up.

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<v Speaker 2>Luckily they're too gay men, so I didn't have to

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<v Speaker 2>be ashamed. And I said, you, guys, I need you

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<v Speaker 2>to get me my pea coat because I can't walk

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<v Speaker 2>out of the salon like this because I've urinated all

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<v Speaker 2>over myself. And they both looked at each other, got

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<v Speaker 2>my coat and didn't even say goodbye to me.

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<v Speaker 1>They were both like, fuck off, get out of here.

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<v Speaker 1>But so now, because of this crazy cough, I have

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<v Speaker 1>to wear a Maxi shield because a urine is just

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<v Speaker 1>gonna come out.

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<v Speaker 6>A Maxie shield.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, it's shielding the rest of the world from my urine.

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<v Speaker 6>I wouldn't judge you, but like behind your back, I would.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, I'm judging me in front of us.

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<v Speaker 6>To both of us, your pants, Well that sounds like

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<v Speaker 6>it's next.

0:09:35.520 --> 0:09:37.800
<v Speaker 2>By the way, did you hear that Putin shot his pants?

0:09:38.360 --> 0:09:41.920
<v Speaker 2>Putin fell down the stairs. Good for you, you fucking asshole,

0:09:42.000 --> 0:09:43.280
<v Speaker 2>and then shot his pants.

0:09:43.360 --> 0:09:45.679
<v Speaker 1>Oh yes, I love so good.

0:09:45.800 --> 0:09:48.720
<v Speaker 2>I love stories about people sitting their pants, especially that guy.

0:09:49.000 --> 0:09:51.520
<v Speaker 6>It's great. Okay, so back to you all. The journey,

0:09:51.520 --> 0:09:53.400
<v Speaker 6>the journey, the journey. Yeah, so I mean it's it's

0:09:53.440 --> 0:09:55.400
<v Speaker 6>I can keep it quick. It was I was out

0:09:55.440 --> 0:09:57.880
<v Speaker 6>of college. I was on unemployment text trying to figure

0:09:57.880 --> 0:09:59.720
<v Speaker 6>out my house. Did you go to a Boston university?

0:10:00.000 --> 0:10:02.520
<v Speaker 1>I was just in Boston. Buss is my favorite city.

0:10:02.520 --> 0:10:04.559
<v Speaker 6>I love it. It was so good for college too.

0:10:04.960 --> 0:10:06.560
<v Speaker 6>I feel like New York you think you would want

0:10:06.600 --> 0:10:07.640
<v Speaker 6>to go there, and then you're like, well, I don't

0:10:07.640 --> 0:10:09.480
<v Speaker 6>want to be in college in New York City?

0:10:09.679 --> 0:10:10.160
<v Speaker 1>What the fuck?

0:10:10.320 --> 0:10:13.599
<v Speaker 6>So Boston was perfect because I had all of the colleges,

0:10:13.679 --> 0:10:15.880
<v Speaker 6>and then that's where the professional athletes came in because

0:10:15.880 --> 0:10:17.400
<v Speaker 6>they were like, oh, I'm the city and it was great.

0:10:17.520 --> 0:10:19.679
<v Speaker 6>It was just a perfect opportunity for me to really thrive.

0:10:20.080 --> 0:10:22.720
<v Speaker 6>I got out of college and I had this like

0:10:22.760 --> 0:10:24.960
<v Speaker 6>awful job. I was in sales and it was for

0:10:25.000 --> 0:10:27.439
<v Speaker 6>a magazine and print is fucking dying. So my boss

0:10:27.480 --> 0:10:29.240
<v Speaker 6>is always like, why can't you sell shit? I'm like,

0:10:29.280 --> 0:10:31.920
<v Speaker 6>because who the fuck wants to buy an advertisement in

0:10:32.000 --> 0:10:35.520
<v Speaker 6>a magazine like bitch, this is dinosaur ages. So I

0:10:35.679 --> 0:10:39.000
<v Speaker 6>was really unamused by my job, miserable, and I was

0:10:39.040 --> 0:10:41.360
<v Speaker 6>just typing up scripts every day, like wanted to start

0:10:41.360 --> 0:10:43.400
<v Speaker 6>a YouTube channel. Want to do something in the creative field.

0:10:43.679 --> 0:10:47.320
<v Speaker 6>My dad's in sports television. I majored in film and television.

0:10:47.360 --> 0:10:49.400
<v Speaker 6>And then I'm at a fucking ad agency. But that's

0:10:49.440 --> 0:10:51.080
<v Speaker 6>usually how it goes, Like you gotta get a job

0:10:51.080 --> 0:10:55.040
<v Speaker 6>you hate. And finally I got fired and it was incredible.

0:10:55.160 --> 0:10:57.680
<v Speaker 6>Everyone was crying the day we all got laid off,

0:10:57.880 --> 0:11:00.319
<v Speaker 6>and I was like crying tears of happiness just because

0:11:00.640 --> 0:11:02.960
<v Speaker 6>I hated my job so much. But I didn't have

0:11:03.000 --> 0:11:05.120
<v Speaker 6>the balls to leave because I couldn't financially just be

0:11:05.160 --> 0:11:07.160
<v Speaker 6>like I'm gonna leave and go like I don't come

0:11:07.160 --> 0:11:08.600
<v Speaker 6>from a trust fund, like I had to have a

0:11:08.600 --> 0:11:12.040
<v Speaker 6>fucking job. So I'm on unemployment checks. And I was

0:11:12.040 --> 0:11:14.400
<v Speaker 6>gonna start a YouTube channel for my in Boston in

0:11:14.679 --> 0:11:16.679
<v Speaker 6>New York. Now I'm living in New York. And then

0:11:16.720 --> 0:11:19.600
<v Speaker 6>I wanted to start a YouTube channel. Call her Daddy

0:11:19.800 --> 0:11:21.520
<v Speaker 6>was now an idea and I was gonna do it

0:11:21.520 --> 0:11:23.720
<v Speaker 6>as a YouTube channel, and then some people were like,

0:11:23.720 --> 0:11:26.400
<v Speaker 6>you should do a podcast. It's not oversaturated like YouTube

0:11:26.480 --> 0:11:26.920
<v Speaker 6>right now.

0:11:26.920 --> 0:11:30.760
<v Speaker 1>Especially with the way you fucking talk. Shut the fuck up.

0:11:31.160 --> 0:11:33.400
<v Speaker 1>You should have been born with a fucking podcast.

0:11:33.480 --> 0:11:35.120
<v Speaker 6>I literally came out of the womb and like, I

0:11:35.120 --> 0:11:36.720
<v Speaker 6>I should have had a microphone in front of me

0:11:36.720 --> 0:11:38.920
<v Speaker 6>because I can never stop talking. My mother's always like

0:11:38.960 --> 0:11:41.640
<v Speaker 6>shut the fuck up, let your other siblings speak. Absolutely not.

0:11:42.160 --> 0:11:45.000
<v Speaker 6>So then I just started the podcast and I had

0:11:45.200 --> 0:11:47.640
<v Speaker 6>really no plan, like there was no business plan. I

0:11:47.640 --> 0:11:50.280
<v Speaker 6>didn't know anything about the industry. And after the first

0:11:50.320 --> 0:11:54.520
<v Speaker 6>episode was uploaded, Dave Portnoy from barstool DMed me and

0:11:54.679 --> 0:11:57.040
<v Speaker 6>was like what is this thing? Like what is going

0:11:57.040 --> 0:11:59.240
<v Speaker 6>on here? Like who made this promo? And I was like, oh,

0:11:59.240 --> 0:12:01.480
<v Speaker 6>I edited it to get like I edited it myself.

0:12:01.559 --> 0:12:03.480
<v Speaker 6>I went to film school and then I went in

0:12:03.520 --> 0:12:06.240
<v Speaker 6>for meeting. Dave Portnoy signed me and the show went

0:12:06.320 --> 0:12:09.559
<v Speaker 6>like number one on episode four, Wow, and it was wild,

0:12:09.679 --> 0:12:13.000
<v Speaker 6>And so it was like very aggressive start where I

0:12:13.120 --> 0:12:17.360
<v Speaker 6>wasn't prepared almost for the success. I understand. I'm so lucky.

0:12:17.480 --> 0:12:19.439
<v Speaker 6>Sometimes you have to work something for a very long time.

0:12:19.760 --> 0:12:21.880
<v Speaker 6>For me, it like it was uploaded and then it

0:12:21.920 --> 0:12:23.679
<v Speaker 6>was like what the fuck do I do now? There

0:12:23.720 --> 0:12:25.840
<v Speaker 6>was no plan, there was no vision, and so it

0:12:25.920 --> 0:12:29.080
<v Speaker 6>was kind of like a makeshift moment where every week

0:12:29.280 --> 0:12:31.679
<v Speaker 6>was just like trying to come up with a new

0:12:31.679 --> 0:12:34.840
<v Speaker 6>episode and a new concept. And then it just got big.

0:12:34.880 --> 0:12:37.439
<v Speaker 6>And then I left barstool, took my IP and went

0:12:37.480 --> 0:12:39.400
<v Speaker 6>to Spotify. It was pretty wild.

0:12:39.800 --> 0:12:41.360
<v Speaker 1>And how long has that been?

0:12:41.679 --> 0:12:43.600
<v Speaker 6>So I have a three year deal with Spotify and

0:12:43.640 --> 0:12:47.560
<v Speaker 6>I'm halfway into my second year. So it's been pretty

0:12:47.679 --> 0:12:50.240
<v Speaker 6>wild and it's been like a pretty amazing experience.

0:12:50.400 --> 0:12:52.640
<v Speaker 2>And do you have any interest in like having a

0:12:52.679 --> 0:12:53.400
<v Speaker 2>talk show?

0:12:54.080 --> 0:12:56.720
<v Speaker 6>Oh, I don't even know what. Like, it's quite crazy

0:12:56.720 --> 0:12:58.520
<v Speaker 6>because if you asked me, I never thought I would

0:12:58.520 --> 0:13:00.760
<v Speaker 6>be a podcaster, Like they didn't know that was even

0:13:00.800 --> 0:13:02.520
<v Speaker 6>a fucking thing back in the day. It'd be like

0:13:02.600 --> 0:13:05.719
<v Speaker 6>my dad's hobby was to like listen to podcasts, and

0:13:05.840 --> 0:13:09.080
<v Speaker 6>now I'm a podcaster. And so I don't know, Like

0:13:09.120 --> 0:13:10.439
<v Speaker 6>I don't know if it'd be a talk show. I

0:13:10.480 --> 0:13:12.600
<v Speaker 6>don't know if it's gonna continue. I think I'm just

0:13:12.720 --> 0:13:14.960
<v Speaker 6>making my show what I want it to be. Like

0:13:15.040 --> 0:13:17.960
<v Speaker 6>I'm doing video now that's not a podcast technically, but

0:13:18.040 --> 0:13:19.920
<v Speaker 6>it is because I want it to be. Like I'm

0:13:20.040 --> 0:13:23.680
<v Speaker 6>very stimulated by the visual aspect. Audio was never like

0:13:23.760 --> 0:13:26.200
<v Speaker 6>my passion, but it is how I got obviously.

0:13:26.400 --> 0:13:28.439
<v Speaker 2>Well it's kind of funny because it all fucking turns

0:13:28.440 --> 0:13:31.000
<v Speaker 2>into the same thing anyway. You know, like podcasting was

0:13:31.000 --> 0:13:32.920
<v Speaker 2>supposed to be so it wasn't on the air, and

0:13:32.960 --> 0:13:35.240
<v Speaker 2>then all of a sudden, you're watching podcasts on YouTube

0:13:35.280 --> 0:13:37.520
<v Speaker 2>and you're watching them and now it's a TV show

0:13:37.600 --> 0:13:39.800
<v Speaker 2>and you're like, it's like all of media.

0:13:40.000 --> 0:13:41.240
<v Speaker 1>You know, all these streaming.

0:13:41.000 --> 0:13:43.920
<v Speaker 2>Platforms are basically turning back into the three major networks

0:13:43.960 --> 0:13:48.080
<v Speaker 2>because they're all amalgamating. You know, Disney buys this, Warner

0:13:48.120 --> 0:13:50.800
<v Speaker 2>buys this, blah blah blah blah, Viacom buys this, and

0:13:50.840 --> 0:13:53.000
<v Speaker 2>we're basically getting right back to where we started.

0:13:53.240 --> 0:13:55.200
<v Speaker 1>So we have all these streaming platforms that are now

0:13:55.240 --> 0:13:56.000
<v Speaker 1>gonna put.

0:13:56.000 --> 0:14:00.000
<v Speaker 2>Commercials back on, so they're back to NBC, ABC and CBS.

0:14:00.200 --> 0:14:02.880
<v Speaker 1>It's all really stupid. It's like cell phones came out.

0:14:03.200 --> 0:14:06.040
<v Speaker 2>They were really small, then they got really big, and

0:14:06.080 --> 0:14:08.800
<v Speaker 2>then they got small, and now they're like what the fuck.

0:14:08.960 --> 0:14:10.880
<v Speaker 3>You know, I'm just waiting for them to like come

0:14:10.920 --> 0:14:13.680
<v Speaker 3>up with bundles of streaming services and then it's just cable.

0:14:13.800 --> 0:14:17.120
<v Speaker 2>Absolutely, you're right, right, it's a great point, So tell

0:14:17.200 --> 0:14:19.280
<v Speaker 2>us about it, and then now you're in a normal relationship.

0:14:19.320 --> 0:14:20.680
<v Speaker 1>I find that hard to believe.

0:14:20.840 --> 0:14:23.440
<v Speaker 6>It's very hard to believe, and I know people on

0:14:23.440 --> 0:14:25.680
<v Speaker 6>the internet which shit talk me like he doesn't exist.

0:14:26.080 --> 0:14:28.680
<v Speaker 1>It's not I'm mad at me. He exists.

0:14:28.800 --> 0:14:31.800
<v Speaker 6>He exists, thank you. Yeah, it's really wild. I think

0:14:31.880 --> 0:14:37.480
<v Speaker 6>that the reason it's so normal is because I actually

0:14:37.480 --> 0:14:39.680
<v Speaker 6>don't fucking know. I need to think about this answer.

0:14:39.920 --> 0:14:42.640
<v Speaker 6>I guess it's normal because he's very normal. He grew

0:14:42.720 --> 0:14:45.440
<v Speaker 6>up in LA He's very unaffected by just all of

0:14:45.440 --> 0:14:47.440
<v Speaker 6>it because you grew up around it, and he has

0:14:47.480 --> 0:14:50.080
<v Speaker 6>no interest in it. He's in the industry, but he's

0:14:50.200 --> 0:14:53.280
<v Speaker 6>very private, so we keep things offline, which I think

0:14:53.360 --> 0:14:57.360
<v Speaker 6>is nice because my relationship is not predicated on what

0:14:57.480 --> 0:15:00.440
<v Speaker 6>other people think about us. And I'm not like making

0:15:00.520 --> 0:15:03.800
<v Speaker 6>decisions because I'm seeing comments or I'm not using it

0:15:03.840 --> 0:15:07.040
<v Speaker 6>to monetize my business. It's a real relationship. And so

0:15:07.080 --> 0:15:08.480
<v Speaker 6>if I don't like him, I don't like him. Before

0:15:08.480 --> 0:15:09.760
<v Speaker 6>I like him, I like him. It's not going to

0:15:09.800 --> 0:15:11.840
<v Speaker 6>be based off of something I see on social media.

0:15:11.920 --> 0:15:13.040
<v Speaker 6>And I don't even give a shit. If you have

0:15:13.040 --> 0:15:15.440
<v Speaker 6>a platform, like when people have one hundred followers and

0:15:15.440 --> 0:15:19.000
<v Speaker 6>you're posting your partner, it is affected, you know what

0:15:19.000 --> 0:15:20.720
<v Speaker 6>I mean? Like or how many comments do we get

0:15:20.720 --> 0:15:22.320
<v Speaker 6>we can get in as many likes on that, Like

0:15:22.480 --> 0:15:25.240
<v Speaker 6>people are saying he's so hot, are they gonna DM him?

0:15:25.280 --> 0:15:27.280
<v Speaker 6>Or he's so ugly? Should I dump him? Like there's

0:15:27.360 --> 0:15:30.400
<v Speaker 6>too much stimulation going on. And so I think the

0:15:31.160 --> 0:15:33.800
<v Speaker 6>crux of why it's healthy is because it's as normal

0:15:33.800 --> 0:15:36.080
<v Speaker 6>as I could humanly possibly make it, and the only

0:15:36.120 --> 0:15:38.520
<v Speaker 6>people that are influencing my relationship is me and him.

0:15:38.760 --> 0:15:39.240
<v Speaker 1>I like that.

0:15:39.400 --> 0:15:40.040
<v Speaker 6>Yeah, And what.

0:15:40.040 --> 0:15:40.680
<v Speaker 1>Would you say?

0:15:40.760 --> 0:15:42.480
<v Speaker 2>I mean, I'm gonna ask you probably a hard question

0:15:42.560 --> 0:15:44.880
<v Speaker 2>to answer, but I think you probably can because you

0:15:44.920 --> 0:15:46.880
<v Speaker 2>seem to have a good, strong sense of yourself, which

0:15:46.920 --> 0:15:49.520
<v Speaker 2>I think is really admirable and I wish all women

0:15:49.560 --> 0:15:53.080
<v Speaker 2>would have, especially in their twenties. What would you accredit

0:15:53.160 --> 0:15:56.640
<v Speaker 2>your success and value in this podcast space? What are

0:15:56.680 --> 0:15:59.720
<v Speaker 2>your attributes that have gotten you here? And why do

0:15:59.760 --> 0:16:00.920
<v Speaker 2>you think you're so good at it?

0:16:01.400 --> 0:16:04.360
<v Speaker 6>Thank you? First of all, I mean, I think I

0:16:04.400 --> 0:16:07.240
<v Speaker 6>feel like I was very fortunate to be raised with

0:16:07.320 --> 0:16:10.760
<v Speaker 6>a pretty like normal, stable family, which I recognize that

0:16:10.840 --> 0:16:14.640
<v Speaker 6>makes me like not normal because most people's everyone's family

0:16:14.640 --> 0:16:19.160
<v Speaker 6>shit is family shit. But my parents were so obsessed

0:16:19.160 --> 0:16:21.080
<v Speaker 6>with making sure I was grounded, Like I think they

0:16:21.160 --> 0:16:23.440
<v Speaker 6>knew I wanted to be in entertainment my whole life,

0:16:23.480 --> 0:16:24.880
<v Speaker 6>and they kept being like, no, you're going to go

0:16:24.880 --> 0:16:26.880
<v Speaker 6>to college. No, we're not going to go to auditions

0:16:26.880 --> 0:16:28.600
<v Speaker 6>for you to be an actress, Like no. So they

0:16:28.600 --> 0:16:30.800
<v Speaker 6>were making sure that I was not getting ahead of

0:16:30.840 --> 0:16:32.800
<v Speaker 6>myself and that I was like focusing on what mattered,

0:16:32.800 --> 0:16:35.040
<v Speaker 6>which was in their minds like education and having a

0:16:35.080 --> 0:16:38.040
<v Speaker 6>normal life and being a good person and making me

0:16:38.080 --> 0:16:41.000
<v Speaker 6>go to church every fucking Sunday. And it was just

0:16:41.040 --> 0:16:44.160
<v Speaker 6>a very I grew up in Pennsylvania, and so I

0:16:44.200 --> 0:16:47.280
<v Speaker 6>feel like my parents instilled the values of just like

0:16:47.640 --> 0:16:50.080
<v Speaker 6>not getting affected by all of the bullshit because they

0:16:50.080 --> 0:16:52.120
<v Speaker 6>didn't let me do certain things when I wanted to

0:16:52.120 --> 0:16:55.000
<v Speaker 6>do it. On top of that, I think sports honestly

0:16:55.160 --> 0:16:59.200
<v Speaker 6>was like a huge help towards me having this drive

0:16:59.280 --> 0:17:02.120
<v Speaker 6>and grit and tenacity. And also like the amount of

0:17:02.120 --> 0:17:04.840
<v Speaker 6>people that say shit about me on the internet. I

0:17:04.880 --> 0:17:07.119
<v Speaker 6>don't know why doesn't affect me as much as maybe

0:17:07.160 --> 0:17:10.639
<v Speaker 6>it would other creators. I think because of the absolute

0:17:11.320 --> 0:17:14.960
<v Speaker 6>annihilation I received at playing Division one soccer. It was

0:17:15.000 --> 0:17:16.879
<v Speaker 6>like the hardest thing I've ever done in my life,

0:17:16.960 --> 0:17:20.440
<v Speaker 6>and getting basically like verbally abused every single day by

0:17:20.440 --> 0:17:23.679
<v Speaker 6>a coach and teammates and the whole thing, like it

0:17:23.800 --> 0:17:25.679
<v Speaker 6>just made me a very strong person. So when I

0:17:25.720 --> 0:17:29.280
<v Speaker 6>came into this industry, I'm very passionate about what I do.

0:17:29.359 --> 0:17:31.399
<v Speaker 6>I think is like why I'm able to stay grounded.

0:17:31.440 --> 0:17:33.640
<v Speaker 6>I'm not doing it for wrong reasons. I'm not doing

0:17:33.680 --> 0:17:36.080
<v Speaker 6>it for fame and money, Like I'm driven by the

0:17:36.119 --> 0:17:39.240
<v Speaker 6>fact that, like I've been obsessed with creating since such

0:17:39.240 --> 0:17:41.720
<v Speaker 6>a young age, and then just having support from my

0:17:41.800 --> 0:17:44.320
<v Speaker 6>family and like them literally hip checking me every day

0:17:44.320 --> 0:17:47.440
<v Speaker 6>of like, no, you sound fucking insane, like no, that

0:17:47.520 --> 0:17:49.560
<v Speaker 6>you're being a brat, and I'm like I am, so

0:17:49.720 --> 0:17:52.200
<v Speaker 6>I'm fortunate. I credit it really to my family.

0:17:52.480 --> 0:17:55.440
<v Speaker 1>So you grew up in Pennsylvania, And how many siblings.

0:17:55.000 --> 0:17:56.560
<v Speaker 6>Do you have too, I'm the youngest.

0:17:56.640 --> 0:17:58.119
<v Speaker 1>Okay, I'm the youngest too. And do you have a

0:17:58.160 --> 0:17:59.040
<v Speaker 1>boy and a girl or yup?

0:17:59.280 --> 0:18:01.280
<v Speaker 6>Okay, oldest sister and then middle brother.

0:18:01.440 --> 0:18:03.520
<v Speaker 2>And I also like that because you made an announcement

0:18:03.640 --> 0:18:06.679
<v Speaker 2>last year you were talking about becoming more politically active

0:18:06.760 --> 0:18:08.600
<v Speaker 2>and taking a stand for things that you believe in.

0:18:08.880 --> 0:18:11.280
<v Speaker 2>And I think with somebody with the sized platform you have,

0:18:11.800 --> 0:18:13.480
<v Speaker 2>I think the thing that kind of bugs me is

0:18:13.480 --> 0:18:16.480
<v Speaker 2>when people young people don't do that, it irks me

0:18:16.680 --> 0:18:17.640
<v Speaker 2>because you.

0:18:17.600 --> 0:18:19.360
<v Speaker 1>Know, you have so much influence and so much power.

0:18:19.440 --> 0:18:21.520
<v Speaker 2>So I just love that you're standing up for things,

0:18:21.920 --> 0:18:24.879
<v Speaker 2>and you know, for human rights and for basic things

0:18:24.880 --> 0:18:27.160
<v Speaker 2>that we should all be standing up for. And it's

0:18:27.200 --> 0:18:30.880
<v Speaker 2>not necessarily political to stand up for human rights. It's

0:18:31.000 --> 0:18:34.879
<v Speaker 2>kind of necessary. So that's also another great thing. So

0:18:35.000 --> 0:18:38.080
<v Speaker 2>on this podcast, we give advice to real people who

0:18:38.119 --> 0:18:38.520
<v Speaker 2>call in.

0:18:38.600 --> 0:18:39.840
<v Speaker 4>Well you know a little bit about that.

0:18:39.880 --> 0:18:41.760
<v Speaker 6>I'm excited. I love giving advice.

0:18:41.840 --> 0:18:45.359
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, so do I. I fucking can't get enough of it.

0:18:45.520 --> 0:18:48.120
<v Speaker 2>I'm just like, i overheard a conversation the other day.

0:18:48.119 --> 0:18:49.400
<v Speaker 2>I'm like, can I just chime in here?

0:18:49.600 --> 0:18:49.919
<v Speaker 1>Okay.

0:18:50.440 --> 0:18:52.800
<v Speaker 2>I was like, you're not making any sense right now,

0:18:52.840 --> 0:18:54.040
<v Speaker 2>and you're not helping her.

0:18:54.160 --> 0:18:56.440
<v Speaker 1>I'll help you and you get out of this conversation.

0:18:56.760 --> 0:18:59.399
<v Speaker 1>I was at the airport lounge. Incredible.

0:18:59.640 --> 0:19:01.800
<v Speaker 3>I oh, well, we'll take a quick break and we'll

0:19:01.840 --> 0:19:03.600
<v Speaker 3>be right back with Alex Cooper and.

0:19:03.640 --> 0:19:09.560
<v Speaker 1>Chelsea and we're back great.

0:19:10.280 --> 0:19:14.400
<v Speaker 3>Well, our first email comes from Bella. She's eighteen, she's

0:19:14.440 --> 0:19:17.800
<v Speaker 3>a student. The subject line is please help. He calls

0:19:17.880 --> 0:19:21.840
<v Speaker 3>me mom and can't get it up. Dear Chelsea, I'm

0:19:21.880 --> 0:19:24.560
<v Speaker 3>eighteen and in college and going out with this cool guy.

0:19:25.040 --> 0:19:25.440
<v Speaker 4>For now.

0:19:25.480 --> 0:19:28.040
<v Speaker 3>Things aren't that serious, but we do drop the lbom

0:19:28.160 --> 0:19:31.600
<v Speaker 3>here and there. My problem is sometimes he says I

0:19:31.680 --> 0:19:34.640
<v Speaker 3>love you, mom, or just accidentally calls me mom.

0:19:35.440 --> 0:19:37.560
<v Speaker 4>What the hell am I supposed to think about that?

0:19:38.200 --> 0:19:40.719
<v Speaker 3>I know it's subconscious and he can't help it, but

0:19:40.760 --> 0:19:43.719
<v Speaker 3>it weirds me out. He has a really close relationship

0:19:43.720 --> 0:19:46.399
<v Speaker 3>with his mom after his parents got divorced, but the

0:19:46.440 --> 0:19:49.840
<v Speaker 3>fact that he calls his partner that on accident is strange.

0:19:49.920 --> 0:19:52.520
<v Speaker 1>Right, First, well, it's by accident. It's not on accident.

0:19:53.080 --> 0:19:57.080
<v Speaker 2>He stops saying that everybody, it's things happen by accident.

0:19:57.520 --> 0:19:58.880
<v Speaker 1>Nothing is on an accident.

0:20:00.119 --> 0:20:01.240
<v Speaker 4>Or am I overreacting?

0:20:01.760 --> 0:20:02.920
<v Speaker 1>Am I overreacting?

0:20:03.040 --> 0:20:03.240
<v Speaker 6>Yes?

0:20:03.320 --> 0:20:05.800
<v Speaker 1>It's a fucking bad grammar. I fucking can't take it.

0:20:06.440 --> 0:20:09.320
<v Speaker 3>In addition, he also has this problem with getting it up,

0:20:09.400 --> 0:20:12.000
<v Speaker 3>and he's eighteen two. I don't judge him, and I've

0:20:12.040 --> 0:20:14.679
<v Speaker 3>always made it clear that when it's us, he's safe

0:20:14.680 --> 0:20:17.199
<v Speaker 3>and in a safe space. But he seems young to

0:20:17.240 --> 0:20:19.800
<v Speaker 3>be facing this type of issue. Right, I can't help

0:20:19.840 --> 0:20:22.160
<v Speaker 3>but overthink it. He smokes a shit ton of weed

0:20:22.200 --> 0:20:24.919
<v Speaker 3>on a daily basis, so maybe that's a contributor. But

0:20:25.000 --> 0:20:28.160
<v Speaker 3>this entire situation makes me feel unattractive, even though all

0:20:28.200 --> 0:20:29.919
<v Speaker 3>my friends tell me it's not my fault.

0:20:30.160 --> 0:20:31.840
<v Speaker 4>Kindly, Bella, would you.

0:20:31.800 --> 0:20:32.840
<v Speaker 1>Like to take this from the top?

0:20:32.960 --> 0:20:35.439
<v Speaker 6>Take this number one. You're eighteen years old and all

0:20:35.480 --> 0:20:38.480
<v Speaker 6>I heard was you feel unattractive and this guy is

0:20:38.520 --> 0:20:40.960
<v Speaker 6>calling you his mom. Get the fuck out. I don't

0:20:41.080 --> 0:20:42.840
<v Speaker 6>I feel like when you're at that point in your life,

0:20:42.880 --> 0:20:46.440
<v Speaker 6>if there's any doubt in your mind that something's off, leave,

0:20:46.560 --> 0:20:49.800
<v Speaker 6>You're too young, You've too much to do, You've so

0:20:49.880 --> 0:20:53.600
<v Speaker 6>many opportunities. It's so fucking weird. He's calling you his mom.

0:20:53.840 --> 0:20:56.440
<v Speaker 6>Sorry to anyone that refers to their partner as their mother,

0:20:57.240 --> 0:20:59.359
<v Speaker 6>he either wants to fuck his mom. There's something weird

0:20:59.359 --> 0:21:00.960
<v Speaker 6>that went on, Like, I don't know. I just don't

0:21:00.960 --> 0:21:03.320
<v Speaker 6>think that's for you to uncover. I think it's time

0:21:03.320 --> 0:21:05.560
<v Speaker 6>for you to pack your stuff, find someone that makes

0:21:05.560 --> 0:21:08.879
<v Speaker 6>you feel attractive, and don't be called someone's mom when

0:21:08.880 --> 0:21:11.280
<v Speaker 6>you're trying to fuck them. And unfortunately you can't even

0:21:11.320 --> 0:21:13.240
<v Speaker 6>fuck him because he can't get hard. We don't even

0:21:13.240 --> 0:21:14.720
<v Speaker 6>need to judge him on that. But you want to

0:21:14.720 --> 0:21:16.600
<v Speaker 6>have some good sex in college. Like, let's find someone

0:21:16.640 --> 0:21:18.600
<v Speaker 6>that can fuck and doesn't refer to you as mommy.

0:21:18.680 --> 0:21:20.560
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, there's plenty of guys you can fuck that won't

0:21:20.560 --> 0:21:22.439
<v Speaker 1>get it up, that won't call you mom. You know.

0:21:22.840 --> 0:21:25.760
<v Speaker 2>I mean, first of all, Bella, get out of there.

0:21:26.040 --> 0:21:28.520
<v Speaker 2>This is a waste of your time. This is your prime,

0:21:28.720 --> 0:21:32.120
<v Speaker 2>prime learning to have sex time in your life. Yeah,

0:21:32.160 --> 0:21:34.480
<v Speaker 2>this is where you lay the foundation of what you like,

0:21:34.800 --> 0:21:35.639
<v Speaker 2>what you don't like.

0:21:35.760 --> 0:21:37.959
<v Speaker 1>And you don't like this, he's not getting it up.

0:21:38.119 --> 0:21:40.560
<v Speaker 1>Calling you mom is fucking weird. Uh huh.

0:21:40.600 --> 0:21:43.639
<v Speaker 2>And you just exactly what Elex you said. You just

0:21:43.680 --> 0:21:46.159
<v Speaker 2>said that you don't feel attractive.

0:21:46.840 --> 0:21:49.080
<v Speaker 6>That's it, You're done, done, goodbye bye.

0:21:49.160 --> 0:21:51.879
<v Speaker 3>Find out somebody who makes you feel hot, yes, and

0:21:52.320 --> 0:21:55.360
<v Speaker 3>that can fuck you. I remember being a kid and

0:21:55.400 --> 0:21:58.040
<v Speaker 3>like once a year I would accidentally call a teacher mom.

0:21:58.440 --> 0:22:01.280
<v Speaker 3>That ended in sixth grade. He shouldn't be eighteen and

0:22:01.280 --> 0:22:01.720
<v Speaker 3>still called.

0:22:01.800 --> 0:22:04.880
<v Speaker 6>But a teacher is different because they're an authoritative figure.

0:22:04.680 --> 0:22:08.400
<v Speaker 6>They're helping you learn, they're giving you an education. Although teachers,

0:22:09.000 --> 0:22:12.040
<v Speaker 6>whatever the point is is your teacher's not fucking you, hopefully,

0:22:12.359 --> 0:22:15.359
<v Speaker 6>And I do feel as though there's nothing beneficial in

0:22:15.400 --> 0:22:18.040
<v Speaker 6>this relationship. You're not getting fucked and you're his mommy.

0:22:19.040 --> 0:22:20.720
<v Speaker 6>You're not a mom yet, you know what I mean?

0:22:20.800 --> 0:22:23.160
<v Speaker 6>Those days may come at one point, like leave them

0:22:23.160 --> 0:22:23.800
<v Speaker 6>for later on.

0:22:23.960 --> 0:22:25.280
<v Speaker 1>And for your children. Y.

0:22:25.760 --> 0:22:27.639
<v Speaker 4>Yeah, and it's not your job to fix him.

0:22:27.760 --> 0:22:30.159
<v Speaker 2>No neither, no, no no, learn yeah, nip that in

0:22:30.160 --> 0:22:32.399
<v Speaker 2>the butt, because listen, If you don't learn this lesson now,

0:22:32.560 --> 0:22:34.960
<v Speaker 2>unfortunately you'll have to learn it over and over again.

0:22:35.080 --> 0:22:37.440
<v Speaker 1>So let this be the first and the last time.

0:22:37.760 --> 0:22:38.000
<v Speaker 6>Yes.

0:22:38.840 --> 0:22:41.880
<v Speaker 3>Well, our next question comes from Rachelle, who is maybe

0:22:41.920 --> 0:22:44.080
<v Speaker 3>one of the most angelic sweet people I've ever talked to.

0:22:44.520 --> 0:22:47.240
<v Speaker 3>She's twenty two and she has kind of the opposite question.

0:22:47.960 --> 0:22:50.639
<v Speaker 3>Dear Chelsea, I hope all is well. I'm here reaching

0:22:50.640 --> 0:22:53.600
<v Speaker 3>out for advice on my boyfriend and i's sex life.

0:22:53.680 --> 0:22:57.080
<v Speaker 1>My boyfriend and my sex life, My boyfriend and my

0:22:57.240 --> 0:22:57.840
<v Speaker 1>sex life.

0:22:57.920 --> 0:23:00.840
<v Speaker 3>Yes, we're both twenty two years ago and have been

0:23:00.880 --> 0:23:03.800
<v Speaker 3>together for four years now. Last year we lived together

0:23:03.840 --> 0:23:06.359
<v Speaker 3>in Philly for over a year. It was amazing. We

0:23:06.440 --> 0:23:08.600
<v Speaker 3>both moved back home to our parents so we could

0:23:08.640 --> 0:23:11.320
<v Speaker 3>save some money and eventually move to a better location.

0:23:11.560 --> 0:23:14.520
<v Speaker 3>We live a couple hours apart our dilemma has been

0:23:14.640 --> 0:23:17.080
<v Speaker 3>how horny he often gets and the many times a

0:23:17.119 --> 0:23:20.159
<v Speaker 3>day he attempts to initiate sex. Yes, I'm aware this

0:23:20.280 --> 0:23:22.919
<v Speaker 3>is not the worst problem to have. I've enjoyed our

0:23:22.960 --> 0:23:26.159
<v Speaker 3>time apart because of this. I want so badly to

0:23:26.200 --> 0:23:28.440
<v Speaker 3>live with him, but the thought of once again being

0:23:28.480 --> 0:23:32.000
<v Speaker 3>asked for sex every day infuriates me. It makes me

0:23:32.040 --> 0:23:34.200
<v Speaker 3>feel like I'm just a bunch of holes. I thought

0:23:34.240 --> 0:23:36.520
<v Speaker 3>his sex drive would lower after some time, but it's

0:23:36.560 --> 0:23:40.119
<v Speaker 3>been four years. We're planning our life together, and sometimes

0:23:40.160 --> 0:23:42.800
<v Speaker 3>all I can dream about is the happiness I'll feel

0:23:42.920 --> 0:23:46.080
<v Speaker 3>when we get old and he gets ed. We spoke

0:23:46.119 --> 0:23:48.240
<v Speaker 3>to a therapist about this a couple months ago, and

0:23:48.320 --> 0:23:51.720
<v Speaker 3>she mentioned giving me space to initiate it myself. However,

0:23:51.840 --> 0:23:54.280
<v Speaker 3>I've found that my sex drive seems to be much lower,

0:23:54.320 --> 0:23:56.439
<v Speaker 3>and he does not have the patience to wait for

0:23:56.520 --> 0:23:59.359
<v Speaker 3>me to initiate. This makes me feel like a shitty

0:23:59.359 --> 0:24:01.760
<v Speaker 3>girlfriend for not wanting sex as much as he does,

0:24:01.920 --> 0:24:03.920
<v Speaker 3>but I also feel like I'm dealing with a desperate

0:24:03.960 --> 0:24:07.200
<v Speaker 3>sixteen year old. This is our biggest issue in our relationship.

0:24:07.400 --> 0:24:10.359
<v Speaker 3>We've communicated so much and tried so many different things.

0:24:10.600 --> 0:24:12.680
<v Speaker 3>It's the only thing that makes me wonder if we

0:24:12.680 --> 0:24:15.280
<v Speaker 3>should actually be together and pursue a life with one another,

0:24:15.760 --> 0:24:17.760
<v Speaker 3>if we got married someday. Isn't this something that could

0:24:17.840 --> 0:24:20.480
<v Speaker 3>kill a marriage? Thank you for reading rachelle.

0:24:20.520 --> 0:24:22.240
<v Speaker 1>Okay, first of all, can he go fuck Bella?

0:24:22.440 --> 0:24:25.840
<v Speaker 2>Because Bella needs to get fucked and this guy's got

0:24:25.880 --> 0:24:29.320
<v Speaker 2>extra juice going great for Bella. We had a previous

0:24:29.359 --> 0:24:32.879
<v Speaker 2>caller before you and her boyfriend can't get it up

0:24:32.880 --> 0:24:33.680
<v Speaker 2>and calls her mom.

0:24:33.840 --> 0:24:35.800
<v Speaker 1>So maybe we could just do a swap.

0:24:36.119 --> 0:24:37.600
<v Speaker 7>I think that could solve the problem.

0:24:38.280 --> 0:24:40.480
<v Speaker 6>Well, is this the person who's just asking the question.

0:24:42.400 --> 0:24:43.600
<v Speaker 1>I've never been on this show?

0:24:48.480 --> 0:24:51.320
<v Speaker 7>Why it's a pleasure to meet you up?

0:24:51.520 --> 0:24:55.199
<v Speaker 6>Oh god, I'm so sorry for your predicament.

0:24:55.520 --> 0:24:55.879
<v Speaker 7>Thank you.

0:24:56.320 --> 0:24:57.320
<v Speaker 6>Do you want some advice?

0:24:57.400 --> 0:24:57.600
<v Speaker 1>Yeah?

0:24:57.640 --> 0:24:58.359
<v Speaker 4>Should I go first?

0:24:58.359 --> 0:24:59.160
<v Speaker 6>To just go for it?

0:24:59.200 --> 0:24:59.640
<v Speaker 1>Okay?

0:24:59.800 --> 0:25:01.639
<v Speaker 6>So, so I think this is the classic which I

0:25:01.720 --> 0:25:04.160
<v Speaker 6>think is like, this will make you feel better. No

0:25:04.160 --> 0:25:06.719
<v Speaker 6>one has the same sex drive in a relationship. And

0:25:06.760 --> 0:25:09.240
<v Speaker 6>this is like a very common issue where two people

0:25:09.320 --> 0:25:11.320
<v Speaker 6>are on a different page with their sex life. The

0:25:11.440 --> 0:25:15.160
<v Speaker 6>issue is the person that wants sex more is made

0:25:15.200 --> 0:25:17.320
<v Speaker 6>to feel like the needy one is made to feel

0:25:17.320 --> 0:25:19.320
<v Speaker 6>like I want you all the time and feels rejected

0:25:19.320 --> 0:25:21.520
<v Speaker 6>because the person that doesn't have ash as a sex

0:25:21.600 --> 0:25:25.640
<v Speaker 6>drive is rejecting them. You, however, are like, my vagina

0:25:25.680 --> 0:25:27.760
<v Speaker 6>is gonna fall off if we have sex one more

0:25:27.840 --> 0:25:31.479
<v Speaker 6>goddamn time. Please go jack off in the bathroom. So

0:25:31.640 --> 0:25:34.160
<v Speaker 6>I think it all comes down, in my opinion, to communication.

0:25:34.720 --> 0:25:37.239
<v Speaker 6>I don't feel like you should be having sex in

0:25:37.320 --> 0:25:39.399
<v Speaker 6>moments that you're not turned on and you're not in

0:25:39.440 --> 0:25:41.640
<v Speaker 6>the mood and you're just doing it to appease him.

0:25:41.920 --> 0:25:44.639
<v Speaker 6>But I also understand on his point of view, is like,

0:25:44.720 --> 0:25:47.200
<v Speaker 6>I'm attracted to my partner, I want to have sex

0:25:47.240 --> 0:25:51.240
<v Speaker 6>with my girlfriend, So I would actually set a time.

0:25:51.440 --> 0:25:53.840
<v Speaker 6>It's not after sex, it's not before sex. It's at dinner,

0:25:53.880 --> 0:25:56.159
<v Speaker 6>it's at breakfast, it's at lunch, and you actually have

0:25:56.200 --> 0:25:58.760
<v Speaker 6>a sit down conversation and you start with a compliment

0:25:58.760 --> 0:26:01.639
<v Speaker 6>of how much you appreciate the relationship you have and

0:26:01.760 --> 0:26:03.719
<v Speaker 6>all the things you love about it. But then with

0:26:03.800 --> 0:26:06.280
<v Speaker 6>regard to your sex life, you come from the point

0:26:06.320 --> 0:26:09.680
<v Speaker 6>of view of saying, hey, I'm really struggling because when

0:26:09.720 --> 0:26:12.720
<v Speaker 6>we have sex, I love it. I'm having great sex

0:26:12.760 --> 0:26:16.119
<v Speaker 6>with you, Like there is no denying the dick game's great,

0:26:16.880 --> 0:26:20.800
<v Speaker 6>but I think that for me, there's just certain things

0:26:20.880 --> 0:26:23.760
<v Speaker 6>where I'm maybe not in the mood and you are,

0:26:23.920 --> 0:26:25.840
<v Speaker 6>and I want to just find a happy medium so

0:26:25.880 --> 0:26:28.840
<v Speaker 6>that you feel satisfied and I feel satisfied because it's

0:26:28.840 --> 0:26:30.679
<v Speaker 6>not fair to you. And if your partner is like,

0:26:31.000 --> 0:26:34.439
<v Speaker 6>I can't do that, I'm sorry, then maybe this is

0:26:34.480 --> 0:26:37.159
<v Speaker 6>someone that has a lack of respect in a greater

0:26:37.280 --> 0:26:39.960
<v Speaker 6>aspect that's outside of the bedroom. That's a problem. If

0:26:40.000 --> 0:26:42.280
<v Speaker 6>you're telling your partner that you're not enjoying something and

0:26:42.320 --> 0:26:44.800
<v Speaker 6>they want to continue to do it, that's selfish. So

0:26:44.920 --> 0:26:47.520
<v Speaker 6>hopefully your partner's like, okay, babe, how can we work

0:26:47.560 --> 0:26:49.959
<v Speaker 6>on this? And it's almost like you start like a

0:26:50.000 --> 0:26:52.520
<v Speaker 6>regiment of every time that we want to have sex.

0:26:52.720 --> 0:26:54.359
<v Speaker 6>I get to initiate once a week and you get

0:26:54.400 --> 0:26:56.600
<v Speaker 6>to initiate once a week, and like, let's start with

0:26:56.760 --> 0:26:58.919
<v Speaker 6>that and then go from there. But I think it's

0:26:58.960 --> 0:27:01.399
<v Speaker 6>actually like building in which sounds kind of corny, but

0:27:01.440 --> 0:27:04.919
<v Speaker 6>almost a communication that allows you to tell him how

0:27:05.000 --> 0:27:07.800
<v Speaker 6>you're feeling and then tell him you don't get the

0:27:07.840 --> 0:27:11.480
<v Speaker 6>opportunity to initiate because he's always fucking a horny little dog.

0:27:11.960 --> 0:27:15.760
<v Speaker 6>So on weekends, we're not having sex unless I initiate it,

0:27:15.800 --> 0:27:18.800
<v Speaker 6>and then hopefully you get in the mood and you're like, wait, what,

0:27:19.000 --> 0:27:20.760
<v Speaker 6>So it's like you can pick two days a week

0:27:20.800 --> 0:27:22.240
<v Speaker 6>we're gonna have sex during the week, but on the

0:27:22.240 --> 0:27:24.879
<v Speaker 6>weekend it's my time, or like come up with a rhythm.

0:27:25.040 --> 0:27:25.439
<v Speaker 6>I don't know.

0:27:26.160 --> 0:27:27.760
<v Speaker 1>I like that idea because I understand.

0:27:27.880 --> 0:27:29.880
<v Speaker 2>I can totally relate to being felt like you're being

0:27:29.920 --> 0:27:33.040
<v Speaker 2>attacked all the time sexually when a guy's on you

0:27:33.080 --> 0:27:34.560
<v Speaker 2>and they want to have sex all the time, and

0:27:34.560 --> 0:27:36.960
<v Speaker 2>you're like, give me some space to come to you.

0:27:37.359 --> 0:27:40.240
<v Speaker 2>If I could hit on you and initiate, that would

0:27:40.240 --> 0:27:43.000
<v Speaker 2>be sexier for me. Then constantly feel like if I

0:27:43.000 --> 0:27:44.600
<v Speaker 2>take my shirt off in front of you, I'm gonna

0:27:44.600 --> 0:27:45.480
<v Speaker 2>get pummeled.

0:27:45.800 --> 0:27:47.160
<v Speaker 1>I understand where you're coming from.

0:27:47.240 --> 0:27:50.879
<v Speaker 2>I also think Alex's advice is good and you should

0:27:50.920 --> 0:27:52.200
<v Speaker 2>start with that, But I think.

0:27:52.040 --> 0:27:54.720
<v Speaker 1>It is a big issue if you don't.

0:27:54.520 --> 0:27:57.439
<v Speaker 2>Resolve it now, because you do not want to just

0:27:57.480 --> 0:28:01.280
<v Speaker 2>be spending your life avoiding your partner and avoiding sex.

0:28:01.640 --> 0:28:04.360
<v Speaker 2>I mean, like a sex therapist, someone you can sit

0:28:04.400 --> 0:28:07.480
<v Speaker 2>down with and actually have an honest, open conversation so

0:28:07.520 --> 0:28:10.120
<v Speaker 2>that this is a more even playing field because you're

0:28:10.160 --> 0:28:12.280
<v Speaker 2>just gonna play the avoidance game. You're gonna try and

0:28:12.480 --> 0:28:14.960
<v Speaker 2>be asleep before he gets in the room. You're gonna

0:28:15.000 --> 0:28:18.400
<v Speaker 2>do all of the thing. Yeah, exactly.

0:28:18.480 --> 0:28:20.320
<v Speaker 6>And I agree with you, Chelsea, because I feel like

0:28:20.359 --> 0:28:23.240
<v Speaker 6>what happens is you're gonna start to resent him for

0:28:23.400 --> 0:28:26.200
<v Speaker 6>something that could actually be managed. And so I think

0:28:26.240 --> 0:28:28.399
<v Speaker 6>what it really comes down to is you need to

0:28:28.440 --> 0:28:30.680
<v Speaker 6>figure out how many times a week would you want

0:28:30.680 --> 0:28:32.840
<v Speaker 6>to have sex, and then you need to go from there.

0:28:32.880 --> 0:28:35.760
<v Speaker 6>Of like, if you number one, are enjoying your sex life,

0:28:35.760 --> 0:28:37.480
<v Speaker 6>that's great, Also you don't have to tell us, But

0:28:37.560 --> 0:28:39.640
<v Speaker 6>like if you're not, that's also another whole thing. When

0:28:39.680 --> 0:28:43.280
<v Speaker 6>you're having sex, if he's actually pleasuring you, also how

0:28:43.400 --> 0:28:45.520
<v Speaker 6>is the sex Like is he doing any for play?

0:28:45.560 --> 0:28:48.120
<v Speaker 6>Are you having an orgasm when you're actually having sex?

0:28:48.160 --> 0:28:50.400
<v Speaker 6>Like is it just about him going to poundtown and

0:28:50.400 --> 0:28:52.680
<v Speaker 6>then like splooging in four seconds and you're like, well

0:28:52.680 --> 0:28:54.800
<v Speaker 6>that wasn't fun. Like I think you need to look

0:28:54.840 --> 0:28:58.200
<v Speaker 6>inward and figure out what ways are you being pleasured

0:28:58.480 --> 0:29:01.680
<v Speaker 6>in the actual moment And also is it at all exciting?

0:29:02.040 --> 0:29:03.880
<v Speaker 6>Is it like now just a chore? If it's just

0:29:03.960 --> 0:29:05.720
<v Speaker 6>a chore. I agree, you go. You got to switch

0:29:05.760 --> 0:29:08.080
<v Speaker 6>it up, and you have to talk to him about it, honestly,

0:29:08.120 --> 0:29:11.520
<v Speaker 6>tell him to masturbate like jack off for there.

0:29:11.560 --> 0:29:12.160
<v Speaker 1>We've been there.

0:29:12.840 --> 0:29:15.280
<v Speaker 7>His quote now is like, is this for a tour?

0:29:15.400 --> 0:29:17.400
<v Speaker 7>For one? There was a period when I was like, Hey,

0:29:17.440 --> 0:29:19.880
<v Speaker 7>if you feel that you need to, and I clearly

0:29:19.960 --> 0:29:23.880
<v Speaker 7>am doing my own thing, just go. And he'll be like,

0:29:23.960 --> 0:29:25.680
<v Speaker 7>is this for tour for one? And I actually thought

0:29:25.680 --> 0:29:28.560
<v Speaker 7>that was sweet, And sometimes I'd say for two. Yes,

0:29:28.680 --> 0:29:31.480
<v Speaker 7>definitely have tried that, for sure. It kind of worked for.

0:29:31.440 --> 0:29:34.320
<v Speaker 1>A while, Okay, And do you enjoy the sex when

0:29:34.320 --> 0:29:34.880
<v Speaker 1>you have it?

0:29:35.320 --> 0:29:37.840
<v Speaker 7>Yes? But that's I think that's actually what led to

0:29:37.960 --> 0:29:41.840
<v Speaker 7>him maybe taking different approaches in the same evening, let's say,

0:29:42.160 --> 0:29:45.560
<v Speaker 7>because he knows that it's always the best time and I,

0:29:45.640 --> 0:29:48.760
<v Speaker 7>you know, afterwards, you're so google Gaga and I have

0:29:48.880 --> 0:29:51.160
<v Speaker 7>been in the spot where I almost felt bad, like

0:29:51.200 --> 0:29:52.800
<v Speaker 7>why didn't I want to do this when I end

0:29:52.880 --> 0:29:56.600
<v Speaker 7>up enjoying it so much? But it's because prior I

0:29:56.640 --> 0:30:00.640
<v Speaker 7>don't really feel that I need it. You know, afterwards,

0:30:00.640 --> 0:30:03.640
<v Speaker 7>I'm like, why wouldn't you? You're in love with this man.

0:30:03.720 --> 0:30:06.400
<v Speaker 7>It's the best time, he knows what you like. I'm

0:30:06.480 --> 0:30:09.120
<v Speaker 7>kind of fighting myself here, and then he's like trying

0:30:09.400 --> 0:30:11.880
<v Speaker 7>all these different ways. I don't know.

0:30:12.600 --> 0:30:14.600
<v Speaker 6>I think that when you're talking about this, it makes

0:30:14.600 --> 0:30:18.200
<v Speaker 6>me think that you have to hold strong for yourself

0:30:18.240 --> 0:30:20.640
<v Speaker 6>in moments. Of course, maybe you're gonna enjoy it in

0:30:20.640 --> 0:30:22.640
<v Speaker 6>the moment, but it started out with you were not

0:30:22.680 --> 0:30:24.280
<v Speaker 6>in the mood, you did not want to have sex.

0:30:24.520 --> 0:30:26.520
<v Speaker 6>And so I think that what you can do, even

0:30:26.560 --> 0:30:28.400
<v Speaker 6>though it may be very un sexy, like if it's

0:30:28.400 --> 0:30:30.560
<v Speaker 6>a Monday, you had a hard day of work, whatever

0:30:30.600 --> 0:30:33.600
<v Speaker 6>reason it is, you should literally say, babe, I'm gonna

0:30:33.640 --> 0:30:36.160
<v Speaker 6>be honest, not in the mood today, not in the mood.

0:30:36.400 --> 0:30:38.840
<v Speaker 6>And so when he tries to pressure you and be

0:30:38.960 --> 0:30:41.160
<v Speaker 6>like come on, like whatever, just be like, hey, not today,

0:30:41.160 --> 0:30:43.640
<v Speaker 6>maybe tomorrow. So it's almost like say no and then

0:30:43.760 --> 0:30:45.600
<v Speaker 6>whether you have to literally remove yourself and move to

0:30:45.640 --> 0:30:47.280
<v Speaker 6>the other side of the fucking couch or the bed.

0:30:47.560 --> 0:30:50.560
<v Speaker 6>But I think it's starting with yourself and creating boundaries

0:30:50.600 --> 0:30:53.440
<v Speaker 6>for yourself that will allow you then to feel better

0:30:53.560 --> 0:30:56.120
<v Speaker 6>about your decision when you actually do have sex, because

0:30:56.160 --> 0:30:58.680
<v Speaker 6>it was on your turf right now, it's all on

0:30:58.800 --> 0:31:00.360
<v Speaker 6>his time, and he's just kind of put wishing to

0:31:00.360 --> 0:31:02.840
<v Speaker 6>see if you'll you'll be down. And I think if

0:31:02.880 --> 0:31:05.120
<v Speaker 6>you start saying absolutely not, like not in the mood,

0:31:05.240 --> 0:31:07.520
<v Speaker 6>love you, nothing wrong with you, just not in the mood,

0:31:07.600 --> 0:31:10.320
<v Speaker 6>not tonight, maybe tomorrow, I think it will allow you

0:31:10.360 --> 0:31:12.760
<v Speaker 6>to feel better that you actually stopped it, instead of

0:31:12.760 --> 0:31:15.640
<v Speaker 6>it being like this wish washy in between, like maybe

0:31:15.640 --> 0:31:18.000
<v Speaker 6>it'll happen tonight if I like get her in the

0:31:18.000 --> 0:31:20.960
<v Speaker 6>mood enough, like just create a hard line.

0:31:20.760 --> 0:31:22.560
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, and explain it to him in terms that he

0:31:22.560 --> 0:31:24.560
<v Speaker 2>can understand that it's not so much fun to be

0:31:24.640 --> 0:31:26.680
<v Speaker 2>chased all the time. You sometimes want to be the

0:31:26.720 --> 0:31:30.400
<v Speaker 2>initiator and he's gonna respect that, and he's gonna like that.

0:31:30.720 --> 0:31:32.640
<v Speaker 2>I mean, how sexy is it if he gives you

0:31:32.760 --> 0:31:35.760
<v Speaker 2>enough space that you are the one initiating, going and

0:31:35.800 --> 0:31:37.960
<v Speaker 2>sitting on his lap at night and being like all

0:31:37.960 --> 0:31:39.240
<v Speaker 2>over him, like let's go.

0:31:39.680 --> 0:31:40.640
<v Speaker 1>He's gonna love that.

0:31:40.800 --> 0:31:43.120
<v Speaker 6>What if you literally do this, What if you say,

0:31:43.440 --> 0:31:46.440
<v Speaker 6>whoever initiated last, can't initiate next?

0:31:47.200 --> 0:31:50.040
<v Speaker 7>I love that. You know what I did last weekend?

0:31:50.080 --> 0:31:53.080
<v Speaker 7>I told him I was like, hey, can you when

0:31:53.160 --> 0:31:56.640
<v Speaker 7>I'm going to initiate. Can you just tell me, like, hey, babe,

0:31:56.720 --> 0:31:58.000
<v Speaker 7>not right now? Can you give me a couple of

0:31:58.040 --> 0:32:00.680
<v Speaker 7>minutes like I wanted to feel like just I initiated,

0:32:00.720 --> 0:32:03.080
<v Speaker 7>he didn't bounce, And when I tell you that got

0:32:03.120 --> 0:32:05.480
<v Speaker 7>me hot and bothered. He was like, can you wait

0:32:05.520 --> 0:32:05.880
<v Speaker 7>a moment?

0:32:06.320 --> 0:32:11.520
<v Speaker 6>Okay, So I think that's it. It's you literally almost

0:32:11.520 --> 0:32:14.160
<v Speaker 6>implement a game. So it's like, sorry, hot and fun.

0:32:14.200 --> 0:32:17.000
<v Speaker 6>Oh my god, I'm sorry, I'm getting She.

0:32:16.960 --> 0:32:19.240
<v Speaker 2>Has monkey pots. She came in here today with monkey pox.

0:32:19.280 --> 0:32:20.680
<v Speaker 2>I told her to not do that, and.

0:32:20.640 --> 0:32:22.080
<v Speaker 1>She has no respect for anybody.

0:32:22.520 --> 0:32:24.000
<v Speaker 6>I think this is it. I think this is it.

0:32:24.160 --> 0:32:26.720
<v Speaker 6>You like the game, you want the chase, you want

0:32:26.720 --> 0:32:28.920
<v Speaker 6>to feel like you sometimes can be in control. I

0:32:28.960 --> 0:32:31.080
<v Speaker 6>think that's the end of it, is that you have

0:32:31.240 --> 0:32:35.240
<v Speaker 6>an initiating game. Whoever initiated last now can initiate. I

0:32:36.160 --> 0:32:43.360
<v Speaker 6>love it, right, You're gonna be great.

0:32:43.600 --> 0:32:45.280
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, this is good. This is good.

0:32:45.360 --> 0:32:47.840
<v Speaker 3>The one thing that I'll say as well, like looking

0:32:48.240 --> 0:32:50.320
<v Speaker 3>farther down the road, because you know you've been with

0:32:50.360 --> 0:32:52.240
<v Speaker 3>this guy for four years, you love him, you're looking

0:32:52.320 --> 0:32:55.400
<v Speaker 3>for a future with him. I don't think it's something

0:32:55.400 --> 0:32:57.520
<v Speaker 3>that will destroy your marriage if you guys get married

0:32:57.560 --> 0:32:58.000
<v Speaker 3>one day.

0:32:58.520 --> 0:32:59.680
<v Speaker 4>I've been in a long marriage.

0:33:00.120 --> 0:33:03.840
<v Speaker 3>We have had fluctuating like who wants it more? When

0:33:04.560 --> 0:33:06.080
<v Speaker 3>I used to be the one who wanted it way

0:33:06.080 --> 0:33:07.840
<v Speaker 3>more than he did, and I would get super but

0:33:07.960 --> 0:33:09.960
<v Speaker 3>hurt when he didn't want it when I wanted it.

0:33:10.000 --> 0:33:12.800
<v Speaker 3>So like I get that perspective as well. But you know,

0:33:12.800 --> 0:33:15.400
<v Speaker 3>and it's like you're always being chased down. I will say,

0:33:15.600 --> 0:33:18.000
<v Speaker 3>as you get closer to your thirties and he does

0:33:18.040 --> 0:33:20.800
<v Speaker 3>as well, you may find that, like his levels come

0:33:20.840 --> 0:33:23.320
<v Speaker 3>down a little bit and yours go up, and you

0:33:23.400 --> 0:33:25.840
<v Speaker 3>meet kind of in the middle, because you know, the

0:33:26.320 --> 0:33:27.360
<v Speaker 3>great to look forward to.

0:33:27.720 --> 0:33:30.239
<v Speaker 7>Yeah, I know you guys, just yeah, you gave me

0:33:30.240 --> 0:33:32.640
<v Speaker 7>something to look forward to. And I know he even

0:33:32.720 --> 0:33:35.120
<v Speaker 7>just the idea that that could be, to be a potential.

0:33:35.280 --> 0:33:38.840
<v Speaker 7>He will love that. Yeah, give me time, don't worry.

0:33:40.560 --> 0:33:42.880
<v Speaker 4>Yeah, your thirties will be great for sex. I promise.

0:33:43.080 --> 0:33:43.720
<v Speaker 4>That's awesome.

0:33:44.400 --> 0:33:48.560
<v Speaker 7>Thank you, Oh my god, thank you so much. I

0:33:48.600 --> 0:33:49.760
<v Speaker 7>can't wait to talk to him about that.

0:33:49.800 --> 0:33:53.680
<v Speaker 1>You know, cut, You're so cute. I love it. Bye bye,

0:33:53.680 --> 0:33:54.600
<v Speaker 1>bye bye.

0:33:54.920 --> 0:33:57.000
<v Speaker 4>She the cutest person who ever laid your eyes on.

0:33:57.120 --> 0:34:00.760
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, that was really good advice. Yeah, that's supper. Way

0:34:00.800 --> 0:34:01.000
<v Speaker 1>to go.

0:34:05.400 --> 0:34:07.160
<v Speaker 4>Well, our next caller is Sandra.

0:34:07.880 --> 0:34:09.920
<v Speaker 1>Sandra Bullocks Sandra Sandy.

0:34:10.000 --> 0:34:12.640
<v Speaker 2>Imagine it's usually very private, so you guys, let's keep

0:34:12.640 --> 0:34:13.520
<v Speaker 2>this one under wraps.

0:34:14.400 --> 0:34:16.920
<v Speaker 3>Jesays Dear Chelsea. I'm a thirty year old female and

0:34:16.960 --> 0:34:19.120
<v Speaker 3>I've been dating my forty five year old boyfriend for

0:34:19.160 --> 0:34:19.879
<v Speaker 3>almost a year.

0:34:20.320 --> 0:34:21.839
<v Speaker 4>I recently found out that he.

0:34:21.800 --> 0:34:25.279
<v Speaker 3>Has visited escorts in the not so distant past. I

0:34:25.400 --> 0:34:27.719
<v Speaker 3>found this out because I looked at his text messages.

0:34:27.960 --> 0:34:30.000
<v Speaker 3>I know this isn't a good habit and I'm likely

0:34:30.120 --> 0:34:32.720
<v Speaker 3>just looking for ways to feel betrayed, but I'm working

0:34:32.760 --> 0:34:35.239
<v Speaker 3>on this with my therapist. I've looked once before and

0:34:35.360 --> 0:34:37.760
<v Speaker 3>was honest with him about it, and it definitely affected

0:34:37.760 --> 0:34:40.880
<v Speaker 3>our trust with each other. Our trust has since recovered,

0:34:41.040 --> 0:34:43.880
<v Speaker 3>I guess, until I chose to look again this time.

0:34:43.920 --> 0:34:46.359
<v Speaker 3>I found text messages of him making appointments to hire

0:34:46.400 --> 0:34:49.160
<v Speaker 3>an escort, and I should mention this is before they

0:34:49.160 --> 0:34:52.400
<v Speaker 3>were together. He was also specifically asking for certain women,

0:34:52.680 --> 0:34:54.680
<v Speaker 3>so I think that it was not a one time thing.

0:34:55.200 --> 0:34:58.160
<v Speaker 3>The most recent text was seven months before we started dating.

0:34:58.480 --> 0:35:01.680
<v Speaker 3>A little contexts a divorced man who was married for

0:35:01.719 --> 0:35:04.200
<v Speaker 3>thirteen years, and says that they would go years at

0:35:04.239 --> 0:35:06.359
<v Speaker 3>a time without having sex and this was a big

0:35:06.360 --> 0:35:09.120
<v Speaker 3>factor in their separation. He also disclosed to me in

0:35:09.160 --> 0:35:11.640
<v Speaker 3>the first month we were dating that he had cheated

0:35:11.640 --> 0:35:13.759
<v Speaker 3>on his ex wife with a stripper while he was

0:35:13.800 --> 0:35:16.279
<v Speaker 3>really drunk. He said he told his ex wife right

0:35:16.320 --> 0:35:19.040
<v Speaker 3>away and felt horrible and thought I should know upfront.

0:35:19.680 --> 0:35:21.799
<v Speaker 3>He has now been divorced for three years, but when

0:35:21.840 --> 0:35:24.080
<v Speaker 3>he hired these most recent escorts, he was in and

0:35:24.080 --> 0:35:27.200
<v Speaker 3>out of casual and more serious relationships, so I don't

0:35:27.200 --> 0:35:29.200
<v Speaker 3>think it was out of a lack of intimacy like

0:35:29.280 --> 0:35:32.120
<v Speaker 3>he'd previously felt in his marriage. He's also sober now,

0:35:32.200 --> 0:35:35.360
<v Speaker 3>so he can't blame being a drunk either. Our relationship

0:35:35.400 --> 0:35:38.439
<v Speaker 3>has honestly been great so far. Any hard conversation we've

0:35:38.480 --> 0:35:40.680
<v Speaker 3>had has made us stronger, and he's been a loving

0:35:40.680 --> 0:35:41.720
<v Speaker 3>and supportive partner.

0:35:42.280 --> 0:35:42.520
<v Speaker 6>Now.

0:35:42.560 --> 0:35:44.240
<v Speaker 3>I don't know what I should do with this information,

0:35:44.360 --> 0:35:45.600
<v Speaker 3>or even how to feel about it.

0:35:45.840 --> 0:35:47.000
<v Speaker 4>I worried that there are.

0:35:46.960 --> 0:35:49.479
<v Speaker 3>Some fucked up power dynamics involved in why he chose

0:35:49.480 --> 0:35:52.160
<v Speaker 3>to sleep with those escorts, but I also recognize it

0:35:52.200 --> 0:35:54.120
<v Speaker 3>was in his past before me and I found out

0:35:54.160 --> 0:35:58.280
<v Speaker 3>this information by looking through his things update from Sandra.

0:35:58.560 --> 0:36:01.440
<v Speaker 3>Her boyfriend is soon going to be visiting Thailand, so

0:36:01.440 --> 0:36:03.239
<v Speaker 3>there's some time sensitivity here.

0:36:03.600 --> 0:36:07.000
<v Speaker 6>Hi Sandra, Hey, Hi guys.

0:36:07.040 --> 0:36:08.640
<v Speaker 1>How are you hi? Good?

0:36:08.680 --> 0:36:08.919
<v Speaker 5>Good?

0:36:08.960 --> 0:36:10.960
<v Speaker 1>How are you doing good?

0:36:11.360 --> 0:36:13.680
<v Speaker 6>This is a deep one. I think reading that, I

0:36:14.120 --> 0:36:16.480
<v Speaker 6>feel a couple of things. I think number one, you

0:36:16.520 --> 0:36:20.680
<v Speaker 6>can find some solace in the fact that everything you

0:36:20.840 --> 0:36:26.120
<v Speaker 6>found predated your relationship. I actually appreciated that you also

0:36:26.239 --> 0:36:29.440
<v Speaker 6>noted that he had told his ex wife immediately after

0:36:29.480 --> 0:36:32.840
<v Speaker 6>something had happened. So it feels like the first step

0:36:32.960 --> 0:36:35.799
<v Speaker 6>is that he has no issue being very open and

0:36:35.840 --> 0:36:38.279
<v Speaker 6>honest in communication, even if it means he fucked up.

0:36:38.600 --> 0:36:41.640
<v Speaker 6>So we're we're already operating on a good playing field.

0:36:41.680 --> 0:36:44.359
<v Speaker 6>Because when you have a compulsive liar or someone that's

0:36:44.400 --> 0:36:47.040
<v Speaker 6>going to constantly be hiding things, that's where it gets

0:36:47.120 --> 0:36:49.959
<v Speaker 6>really tricky. The issue is is if he was doing

0:36:49.960 --> 0:36:52.080
<v Speaker 6>this in his past, there's no saying that he wasn't

0:36:52.120 --> 0:36:54.839
<v Speaker 6>going to be doing it now in your relationship. And

0:36:54.880 --> 0:36:58.280
<v Speaker 6>the issue again is that you found this by snooping,

0:36:58.480 --> 0:37:02.120
<v Speaker 6>and so you can't be like, hey, like I found this,

0:37:02.160 --> 0:37:04.120
<v Speaker 6>I'm wondering if you're doing it to me, because then

0:37:04.160 --> 0:37:07.200
<v Speaker 6>he can be like, you invaded my privacy and I

0:37:07.239 --> 0:37:08.560
<v Speaker 6>have never done that with you because we're in a

0:37:08.560 --> 0:37:10.960
<v Speaker 6>committed relationship. So I see why you're kind of in

0:37:11.000 --> 0:37:13.279
<v Speaker 6>a pickle. I think what it comes down to is

0:37:13.400 --> 0:37:16.360
<v Speaker 6>if you can't trust your partner, you have a huge issue.

0:37:16.520 --> 0:37:19.000
<v Speaker 6>And I don't know if I would personally be in

0:37:19.000 --> 0:37:22.799
<v Speaker 6>a relationship where I constantly was wondering and stressing out.

0:37:22.840 --> 0:37:25.640
<v Speaker 6>I've been in those relationships, so I think that if

0:37:25.680 --> 0:37:27.880
<v Speaker 6>I were you, I would nip it in the butt

0:37:27.960 --> 0:37:29.920
<v Speaker 6>so that you're not wasting time and you may have

0:37:29.960 --> 0:37:32.120
<v Speaker 6>to throw yourself under the bus a little bit. Because wait,

0:37:32.200 --> 0:37:34.319
<v Speaker 6>let me actually ask you, how did you know.

0:37:34.320 --> 0:37:37.759
<v Speaker 5>He told his ex wife He told me perfect, Yeah,

0:37:37.920 --> 0:37:41.440
<v Speaker 5>first month that we were dating, he immediately told me

0:37:41.600 --> 0:37:46.480
<v Speaker 5>that information without me having to ask. Perfect I did actually,

0:37:46.560 --> 0:37:49.279
<v Speaker 5>because I had said in my letter that I have

0:37:49.480 --> 0:37:53.040
<v Speaker 5>trouble keeping anything inside. I'm very easy to read. He

0:37:53.040 --> 0:37:56.360
<v Speaker 5>would know something was wrong. I told him two days

0:37:56.360 --> 0:37:58.799
<v Speaker 5>ago that I looked through his stuff because he's he's

0:37:58.840 --> 0:38:00.720
<v Speaker 5>currently in Thailand right now.

0:38:01.040 --> 0:38:01.799
<v Speaker 6>And what did he say?

0:38:02.360 --> 0:38:06.120
<v Speaker 5>He basically said, I mean I didn't really ask all

0:38:06.160 --> 0:38:08.520
<v Speaker 5>the questions that I feel like, maybe I wanted to

0:38:08.560 --> 0:38:12.040
<v Speaker 5>because I wasn't really sure even what my questions were

0:38:12.120 --> 0:38:14.279
<v Speaker 5>because I don't know how I'm feeling about it. But

0:38:14.400 --> 0:38:16.839
<v Speaker 5>he just said, yes, he had done that in the

0:38:16.880 --> 0:38:21.440
<v Speaker 5>past before me, and he just wishes that I hadn't

0:38:21.480 --> 0:38:24.600
<v Speaker 5>looked through his stuff and that he hopes that it

0:38:24.640 --> 0:38:28.920
<v Speaker 5>doesn't change my perception of him. But I didn't ask

0:38:29.080 --> 0:38:32.719
<v Speaker 5>too much more. He didn't give any opinions or feelings or.

0:38:33.040 --> 0:38:35.920
<v Speaker 2>Have you done this in previous relationships? Look through your

0:38:35.920 --> 0:38:37.480
<v Speaker 2>partner's phone?

0:38:37.480 --> 0:38:37.600
<v Speaker 6>Not?

0:38:39.840 --> 0:38:43.400
<v Speaker 5>No, not really. I mean I guess I had before

0:38:43.800 --> 0:38:47.120
<v Speaker 5>in my last serious relationship, and that's where I think

0:38:47.120 --> 0:38:50.239
<v Speaker 5>a lot of these trust issues came from, too. He

0:38:50.320 --> 0:38:52.839
<v Speaker 5>struggles with drug addictions, so there was also a lot

0:38:52.880 --> 0:38:55.319
<v Speaker 5>of that too, where I was trying to see, like

0:38:55.680 --> 0:38:58.680
<v Speaker 5>is he lying to me about currently using too? So

0:38:58.719 --> 0:39:01.960
<v Speaker 5>it was its whole other, like monster in itself.

0:39:02.280 --> 0:39:05.319
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, but our biggest mistakes are bringing our old relationships

0:39:05.320 --> 0:39:07.680
<v Speaker 2>into our new relationships, because there's always going to be

0:39:07.680 --> 0:39:11.160
<v Speaker 2>somebody that did something disrespectful or they lied, or they

0:39:11.239 --> 0:39:13.760
<v Speaker 2>cheated or whatever they did. But it is your job,

0:39:13.920 --> 0:39:17.480
<v Speaker 2>as part of your evolutionary growth into becoming more of

0:39:17.520 --> 0:39:20.280
<v Speaker 2>the person that you're meant to become is to stop

0:39:20.320 --> 0:39:23.680
<v Speaker 2>those patterns. You looking through his phone has garnered you

0:39:23.920 --> 0:39:26.759
<v Speaker 2>no knowledge at all, because he volunteered some of this

0:39:26.880 --> 0:39:27.680
<v Speaker 2>information to you.

0:39:27.920 --> 0:39:30.320
<v Speaker 1>The fact that he went and got escorts. Who gives

0:39:30.320 --> 0:39:30.720
<v Speaker 1>a shit.

0:39:31.120 --> 0:39:33.120
<v Speaker 2>That's he's a single guy. He's allowed to do whatever

0:39:33.160 --> 0:39:35.640
<v Speaker 2>the fuck he wants. Those are sex workers that you know.

0:39:36.000 --> 0:39:39.040
<v Speaker 2>That doesn't have any impact on your relationship. I would

0:39:39.120 --> 0:39:42.560
<v Speaker 2>really beseech you to not look through your partner's phone

0:39:42.640 --> 0:39:45.600
<v Speaker 2>unless you have a real fucking reason. It is a

0:39:45.880 --> 0:39:50.279
<v Speaker 2>very toxic thing to do, and it will completely disassemble

0:39:50.320 --> 0:39:52.759
<v Speaker 2>a relationship when you do that, because you're gonna find

0:39:52.840 --> 0:39:56.080
<v Speaker 2>something to bring up. You're gonna find something, and without

0:39:56.120 --> 0:39:59.040
<v Speaker 2>that trust, it's almost like you have no foundation when

0:39:59.080 --> 0:40:01.360
<v Speaker 2>you pick up someone else's phone to look through their stuff,

0:40:01.640 --> 0:40:05.640
<v Speaker 2>you know, without a real reason, without something really concrete

0:40:05.640 --> 0:40:08.080
<v Speaker 2>to go, wait a second, something fishy is happening here.

0:40:08.440 --> 0:40:10.720
<v Speaker 1>You know, it's none of your business what's in his phone.

0:40:11.040 --> 0:40:14.120
<v Speaker 2>It's not And in order to have a real, loving relationship,

0:40:14.160 --> 0:40:17.319
<v Speaker 2>there has to be respect and trust and you have

0:40:17.400 --> 0:40:18.239
<v Speaker 2>to stop doing that.

0:40:18.480 --> 0:40:21.600
<v Speaker 6>I agree, and I think, listen, you can't go back,

0:40:21.719 --> 0:40:25.120
<v Speaker 6>so let's just stay. You went through his phone, and

0:40:25.200 --> 0:40:28.080
<v Speaker 6>I think clearly whether it was from your past relationship

0:40:28.120 --> 0:40:29.960
<v Speaker 6>that's why you did it because you have trust issues,

0:40:30.320 --> 0:40:32.920
<v Speaker 6>or you also had a weird feeling about your partner.

0:40:32.960 --> 0:40:35.000
<v Speaker 6>Now number one, that's an indicator you're not in a

0:40:35.040 --> 0:40:37.520
<v Speaker 6>healthy relationship if you don't trust your partner. But let's

0:40:37.560 --> 0:40:39.319
<v Speaker 6>say now, okay, you look through the phone. You brought

0:40:39.320 --> 0:40:41.920
<v Speaker 6>it up to him. My advice would be that you

0:40:42.000 --> 0:40:44.560
<v Speaker 6>have a follow up phone call like FaceTime him and

0:40:44.600 --> 0:40:46.840
<v Speaker 6>be like, Hey, I've been thinking, and I want to

0:40:46.840 --> 0:40:51.000
<v Speaker 6>first apologize because I feel really shitty that I went

0:40:51.040 --> 0:40:53.719
<v Speaker 6>through your phone, and I will admit part of that

0:40:53.840 --> 0:40:56.920
<v Speaker 6>is on me and my baggage and my trust issues

0:40:56.920 --> 0:40:58.880
<v Speaker 6>of I did that in a past relationship and I

0:40:58.920 --> 0:41:01.040
<v Speaker 6>found shit that I didn't want to see, and so

0:41:01.120 --> 0:41:03.959
<v Speaker 6>it almost like reinforced that I should look through because

0:41:03.960 --> 0:41:05.879
<v Speaker 6>I'm going to find the hurt and I'm gonna find

0:41:05.920 --> 0:41:08.200
<v Speaker 6>out the truth that you're lying to me. What I

0:41:08.239 --> 0:41:11.000
<v Speaker 6>want to say is this, I want this relationship to work,

0:41:11.040 --> 0:41:12.759
<v Speaker 6>and I want to better myself and I want to

0:41:12.800 --> 0:41:16.439
<v Speaker 6>be honest with you. I promise to never look through

0:41:16.480 --> 0:41:19.080
<v Speaker 6>your stuff again. I think all I can ask though

0:41:19.120 --> 0:41:21.759
<v Speaker 6>from you, because it did make me a little insecure

0:41:21.840 --> 0:41:24.120
<v Speaker 6>to see what you've maybe done in the past, that

0:41:24.200 --> 0:41:28.200
<v Speaker 6>if you're having any type of feelings or desires or

0:41:28.239 --> 0:41:31.799
<v Speaker 6>your feel like anything, just talk to me, because I

0:41:31.840 --> 0:41:34.800
<v Speaker 6>would rather you be honest with me than me regret

0:41:35.120 --> 0:41:37.279
<v Speaker 6>now trusting you and telling you I'm not going to

0:41:37.320 --> 0:41:39.080
<v Speaker 6>ever look through your stuff again and then you go

0:41:39.160 --> 0:41:40.960
<v Speaker 6>and cheat. So I think if we can just have

0:41:41.000 --> 0:41:43.239
<v Speaker 6>an open communication, but I'll be honest, it made me

0:41:43.239 --> 0:41:45.720
<v Speaker 6>insecure and I want to own it because I hate

0:41:45.719 --> 0:41:47.680
<v Speaker 6>how I'm feeling right now, and I just want to

0:41:47.719 --> 0:41:50.600
<v Speaker 6>tell you that I think he'll really respect that you're

0:41:50.680 --> 0:41:53.839
<v Speaker 6>owning your shit. But you're also asking, like, hey, meet

0:41:53.840 --> 0:41:56.160
<v Speaker 6>me a little bit in the middle, because I've got

0:41:56.160 --> 0:41:58.560
<v Speaker 6>some trust issues and I want this to work, but

0:41:58.640 --> 0:42:01.000
<v Speaker 6>I also don't want to feel now like I'm gonna

0:42:01.000 --> 0:42:04.400
<v Speaker 6>get fucked over for trusting you. And hopefully, if it's

0:42:04.440 --> 0:42:07.719
<v Speaker 6>a good relationship, he'll reassure you and be like, I

0:42:07.800 --> 0:42:10.400
<v Speaker 6>haven't done this because I'm in love with you and

0:42:10.440 --> 0:42:13.080
<v Speaker 6>I don't need an escort right now because I'm with you,

0:42:13.680 --> 0:42:15.960
<v Speaker 6>and so I think hopefully you'll get the answer you want,

0:42:16.000 --> 0:42:18.040
<v Speaker 6>but I will say if he doesn't give you a

0:42:18.040 --> 0:42:21.239
<v Speaker 6>reassuring answer, and he's like, yeah, sure, I get Like,

0:42:21.480 --> 0:42:23.319
<v Speaker 6>then you also have to look internally of what do

0:42:23.360 --> 0:42:25.640
<v Speaker 6>you need in a relationship to feel fulfilled and maybe

0:42:25.680 --> 0:42:28.839
<v Speaker 6>he doesn't have the same type of attachment styles, et

0:42:28.920 --> 0:42:31.400
<v Speaker 6>cetera to make you feel secure in a relationship.

0:42:31.760 --> 0:42:34.080
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, and this guy went out of his way, you know,

0:42:34.160 --> 0:42:36.319
<v Speaker 3>a month in when you guys are just getting to

0:42:36.360 --> 0:42:38.080
<v Speaker 3>know each other, to like spill all his.

0:42:38.040 --> 0:42:38.560
<v Speaker 4>Shit to you.

0:42:38.640 --> 0:42:41.120
<v Speaker 3>Like he was super upfront with that stuff. So like,

0:42:41.360 --> 0:42:42.960
<v Speaker 3>this isn't even the guy I think you need to

0:42:43.000 --> 0:42:45.480
<v Speaker 3>be looking at his phone right like he's he's giving

0:42:45.520 --> 0:42:48.800
<v Speaker 3>it all to you already. Something that might help shift

0:42:48.800 --> 0:42:51.360
<v Speaker 3>your perspective a little bit on just like maybe feeling

0:42:51.440 --> 0:42:52.480
<v Speaker 3>kind of weird about.

0:42:52.200 --> 0:42:53.400
<v Speaker 4>Like he's hard sex workers.

0:42:53.719 --> 0:42:56.920
<v Speaker 3>Private Parts Unknown is a podcast and they did an episode.

0:42:57.080 --> 0:43:00.399
<v Speaker 3>It's two women who host it, and they didn't ep where.

0:43:00.400 --> 0:43:02.440
<v Speaker 3>They were out of the country somewhere where it's legal,

0:43:02.600 --> 0:43:06.200
<v Speaker 3>and they visited massurs who did happy endings.

0:43:06.520 --> 0:43:07.760
<v Speaker 4>They both got happy endings.

0:43:07.760 --> 0:43:10.319
<v Speaker 3>They had gotten like approval from their partners to do this,

0:43:11.040 --> 0:43:14.200
<v Speaker 3>and it really shifted my perspective on like what that

0:43:14.280 --> 0:43:16.960
<v Speaker 3>experience is really like. But it might be worth a listen,

0:43:17.360 --> 0:43:18.880
<v Speaker 3>just to help you serve you some clarity.

0:43:19.080 --> 0:43:23.080
<v Speaker 5>Yeah, good advice, Yeah yeah, yeah, because that's definitely I'm

0:43:23.080 --> 0:43:25.879
<v Speaker 5>happy with the direction that the call went. That it's

0:43:26.000 --> 0:43:30.399
<v Speaker 5>keeping myself in check and looking like in word at

0:43:30.400 --> 0:43:34.160
<v Speaker 5>the mistakes I've made in this. But that's definitely also

0:43:34.239 --> 0:43:36.719
<v Speaker 5>one of the reasons I had written into is just

0:43:36.760 --> 0:43:40.080
<v Speaker 5>like my general feelings and like confusion over how I'm feeling.

0:43:40.480 --> 0:43:43.800
<v Speaker 5>And I've definitely been trying to do more research into

0:43:43.880 --> 0:43:47.080
<v Speaker 5>it and ask people who have maybe experienced this before

0:43:47.440 --> 0:43:49.200
<v Speaker 5>and how they chose to see it.

0:43:49.520 --> 0:43:51.480
<v Speaker 6>I think, listen, I think it really does come down

0:43:51.480 --> 0:43:54.600
<v Speaker 6>to insecurity, and I can relate. It's almost the same

0:43:54.600 --> 0:43:57.239
<v Speaker 6>as when you see the current boyfriend you have or

0:43:57.280 --> 0:43:59.799
<v Speaker 6>your partner whoever you see their ex and you're like

0:44:00.080 --> 0:44:02.640
<v Speaker 6>pairing yourself and you're stressing out and oh my god,

0:44:02.680 --> 0:44:04.239
<v Speaker 6>am I not enough? And am I as good in

0:44:04.280 --> 0:44:07.360
<v Speaker 6>the bedroom? All that stuff. You have to find a

0:44:07.400 --> 0:44:10.240
<v Speaker 6>lot of this could be fixed by you actually focusing

0:44:10.280 --> 0:44:12.640
<v Speaker 6>on yourself and taking the focus off of him, work

0:44:12.640 --> 0:44:15.640
<v Speaker 6>on yourself. Are you insecure about yourself? What do you

0:44:15.800 --> 0:44:18.440
<v Speaker 6>think is triggering you so much about this? And that

0:44:18.440 --> 0:44:21.600
<v Speaker 6>actually should give you some power back of like, if

0:44:21.640 --> 0:44:24.360
<v Speaker 6>you feel good, if you are reading the signs correctly,

0:44:24.400 --> 0:44:26.640
<v Speaker 6>if you are not being shady, if you're being honest

0:44:26.680 --> 0:44:29.280
<v Speaker 6>in this relationship, and you feel like it's being given

0:44:29.360 --> 0:44:31.600
<v Speaker 6>back to you, that's all you have to worry about.

0:44:31.640 --> 0:44:33.680
<v Speaker 6>And then your own baggage you should deal with on

0:44:33.719 --> 0:44:36.359
<v Speaker 6>the side and not let it affect your new relationship.

0:44:36.840 --> 0:44:38.640
<v Speaker 7>Yeah, totally, thank you.

0:44:39.080 --> 0:44:41.520
<v Speaker 1>Right, But no more looking through his phone?

0:44:41.840 --> 0:44:45.560
<v Speaker 5>Yeah, no, no, no, no, it's a bad habit. I

0:44:45.600 --> 0:44:48.480
<v Speaker 5>need to stop. Yeah, I can go. I'll call him probably,

0:44:48.480 --> 0:44:51.520
<v Speaker 5>And also I'm going to Thailand with him in a week.

0:44:52.200 --> 0:44:53.760
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, I'm hoping.

0:44:53.880 --> 0:44:55.920
<v Speaker 5>Yeah, some good conversations there.

0:44:55.920 --> 0:44:58.279
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, good conversations give him the benefit of the doubt.

0:44:58.280 --> 0:45:00.319
<v Speaker 2>And also when you operate out of like a higher

0:45:00.480 --> 0:45:04.160
<v Speaker 2>level of existence by not reducing yourself to going through

0:45:04.160 --> 0:45:06.640
<v Speaker 2>his phone, you're going to get a different energetic reaction

0:45:06.680 --> 0:45:10.040
<v Speaker 2>from him as well. It's not hot when somebody's paranoid,

0:45:10.160 --> 0:45:10.960
<v Speaker 2>that's not sexy.

0:45:11.480 --> 0:45:11.880
<v Speaker 7>Totally.

0:45:11.960 --> 0:45:14.960
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, Yeah, you got a good dude, So let us

0:45:15.000 --> 0:45:16.680
<v Speaker 3>know how it goes. And if you have a deeper

0:45:16.680 --> 0:45:18.920
<v Speaker 3>conversation with him, and maybe this can lead.

0:45:18.800 --> 0:45:21.280
<v Speaker 1>To and maybe you can enjoy your own escort and.

0:45:23.840 --> 0:45:27.040
<v Speaker 5>I know honestly, I started like looking at I just

0:45:27.080 --> 0:45:29.040
<v Speaker 5>wanted to look up profiles online.

0:45:29.239 --> 0:45:31.799
<v Speaker 1>Keep an open mind. Maybe you guys can throuple up.

0:45:31.960 --> 0:45:35.239
<v Speaker 5>Yeah, like who's doing this and who are these people available?

0:45:35.440 --> 0:45:36.560
<v Speaker 1>The world is your oyster?

0:45:38.360 --> 0:45:44.319
<v Speaker 4>All right? Thanks Sandra, guys, bye bye bye. She's gonna

0:45:44.400 --> 0:45:46.160
<v Speaker 4>enjoy her happy ending massage in Thailand.

0:45:46.880 --> 0:45:49.200
<v Speaker 2>I might just go to Thailand for that massage because

0:45:49.200 --> 0:45:51.080
<v Speaker 2>I wouldn't mind. I mean, I once had a friend

0:45:51.120 --> 0:45:54.080
<v Speaker 2>who told us some MESSU said Bakara went down on

0:45:54.120 --> 0:45:57.400
<v Speaker 2>her and I was like what, I'm like, that happens

0:45:57.640 --> 0:45:59.360
<v Speaker 2>to women, and she's like yeah.

0:45:59.200 --> 0:46:01.560
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, all of a sudden was just like fiddling with me.

0:46:01.760 --> 0:46:03.560
<v Speaker 2>And then he asked if it was okay for him

0:46:03.560 --> 0:46:05.800
<v Speaker 2>to go down on me, and I was like, I

0:46:06.600 --> 0:46:07.480
<v Speaker 2>want that, massaur.

0:46:07.719 --> 0:46:09.440
<v Speaker 1>I'm open to any sort.

0:46:09.239 --> 0:46:11.839
<v Speaker 2>Of that kind of action during a massage, Like, if

0:46:11.840 --> 0:46:13.359
<v Speaker 2>you want to go down on me, I have no

0:46:13.480 --> 0:46:14.720
<v Speaker 2>fucking problem with that.

0:46:14.800 --> 0:46:17.160
<v Speaker 1>FYI for all the messuses that are out here.

0:46:17.640 --> 0:46:20.800
<v Speaker 4>PSA, BSA, A, missus PSA.

0:46:20.840 --> 0:46:24.520
<v Speaker 3>Well, our last question comes from A. She says, Dear Chelsea,

0:46:25.080 --> 0:46:27.080
<v Speaker 3>I need your help finding the right way to exit

0:46:27.160 --> 0:46:30.000
<v Speaker 3>a group chat. This chat consists of nine of my

0:46:30.120 --> 0:46:32.799
<v Speaker 3>college friends. We're now in our mid thirties. The chat

0:46:32.840 --> 0:46:34.880
<v Speaker 3>started a few years ago and used to be fun,

0:46:34.920 --> 0:46:37.640
<v Speaker 3>but has devolved into mostly a few people going back

0:46:37.640 --> 0:46:40.800
<v Speaker 3>and forth about their own personal circumstances. What one husband

0:46:40.880 --> 0:46:43.640
<v Speaker 3>did that's annoying, what one person's kid made at camp,

0:46:43.760 --> 0:46:46.839
<v Speaker 3>or what kind of cosmetics someone tried out. There's never

0:46:46.880 --> 0:46:50.279
<v Speaker 3>anything substantial or frankly interesting. I should add that I

0:46:50.280 --> 0:46:52.440
<v Speaker 3>don't think I've been personally addressed in the chat for

0:46:52.480 --> 0:46:54.959
<v Speaker 3>at least a year. Most of the banter that takes

0:46:54.960 --> 0:46:56.640
<v Speaker 3>place will happen in the middle of the work day,

0:46:56.719 --> 0:46:59.560
<v Speaker 3>and I work full time, so the messages are very disruptive.

0:47:00.040 --> 0:47:01.879
<v Speaker 3>I muted it a long time ago, but of course

0:47:01.880 --> 0:47:04.120
<v Speaker 3>when I open my messages and see there's eighty nine

0:47:04.160 --> 0:47:06.920
<v Speaker 3>on red texts, I either feel guilty or mean by

0:47:06.960 --> 0:47:09.560
<v Speaker 3>clicking open and just clear the inbox, or I end

0:47:09.640 --> 0:47:12.160
<v Speaker 3>up reading the messages out of guilt and regret doing

0:47:12.200 --> 0:47:14.640
<v Speaker 3>so once I've wasted my time and brain space to

0:47:14.680 --> 0:47:17.640
<v Speaker 3>do so. I'm currently only close with one girl in

0:47:17.680 --> 0:47:20.040
<v Speaker 3>the chat. By the way, she hates it too. I

0:47:20.080 --> 0:47:21.960
<v Speaker 3>really want to leave the chat. No one will miss

0:47:22.000 --> 0:47:24.279
<v Speaker 3>my presence because I barely reply as it is, but

0:47:24.360 --> 0:47:26.560
<v Speaker 3>I know that by leaving it comes off as rude

0:47:26.560 --> 0:47:28.080
<v Speaker 3>and mean, how do I do this?

0:47:28.480 --> 0:47:29.480
<v Speaker 4>I don't dislike.

0:47:29.200 --> 0:47:34.160
<v Speaker 3>Anyone, and I don't want to offend anyone. Thanks A oh,

0:47:34.239 --> 0:47:34.719
<v Speaker 3>I don't know.

0:47:34.760 --> 0:47:36.600
<v Speaker 2>I would say I was gonna say mute them, but

0:47:36.680 --> 0:47:38.960
<v Speaker 2>then you have still have it in your inbox.

0:47:39.200 --> 0:47:43.000
<v Speaker 6>I think when you have something that's annoying you in

0:47:43.040 --> 0:47:45.200
<v Speaker 6>your life, and the fact that you said no one's

0:47:45.239 --> 0:47:48.040
<v Speaker 6>gonna miss you, leave that shit, and the fact that

0:47:48.080 --> 0:47:50.279
<v Speaker 6>you also had the one person that you care about

0:47:50.400 --> 0:47:53.040
<v Speaker 6>also hates it, the two of you leave together, be

0:47:53.160 --> 0:47:55.799
<v Speaker 6>like five six, seven eight, press the button.

0:47:55.840 --> 0:47:56.879
<v Speaker 1>And get the fuck out of there.

0:47:57.040 --> 0:47:59.000
<v Speaker 6>I just feel like when you get to a certain

0:47:59.040 --> 0:48:01.160
<v Speaker 6>point in your life, actually, if you're not in college

0:48:01.160 --> 0:48:03.400
<v Speaker 6>and you're surrounded by like groups of people that you

0:48:03.440 --> 0:48:06.400
<v Speaker 6>have to see every day, if something is not making

0:48:06.440 --> 0:48:08.680
<v Speaker 6>you happy and it's annoying you and it actually makes

0:48:08.680 --> 0:48:10.240
<v Speaker 6>you feel worse about yourself, goodbye.

0:48:10.480 --> 0:48:10.680
<v Speaker 1>Yeah.

0:48:10.719 --> 0:48:12.840
<v Speaker 2>And you can also just preface it if you really

0:48:12.840 --> 0:48:14.880
<v Speaker 2>want to like feel good about it, being like, hey, guys,

0:48:14.880 --> 0:48:16.759
<v Speaker 2>I'm sorry, I'm going to exit this chat now.

0:48:16.840 --> 0:48:18.319
<v Speaker 1>I have so much work to do.

0:48:18.400 --> 0:48:21.279
<v Speaker 2>During the day. It's become kind of a distraction. Just

0:48:21.360 --> 0:48:23.360
<v Speaker 2>make up some bullshit. If you don't want to, just

0:48:23.360 --> 0:48:25.160
<v Speaker 2>say so and so, you know, because it comes up

0:48:25.400 --> 0:48:26.719
<v Speaker 2>so and so exited the group.

0:48:26.920 --> 0:48:27.080
<v Speaker 4>Yea.

0:48:27.200 --> 0:48:30.440
<v Speaker 2>From my personal experience, I've exited so many groups and

0:48:30.640 --> 0:48:34.279
<v Speaker 2>just said I'm leaving now goodbye, without any explanation. And

0:48:34.320 --> 0:48:36.200
<v Speaker 2>I have to tell you it is an onus off

0:48:36.200 --> 0:48:38.000
<v Speaker 2>your back. I don't want to deal with all that shit.

0:48:38.440 --> 0:48:40.600
<v Speaker 1>So I mean, you're you should.

0:48:40.280 --> 0:48:41.400
<v Speaker 2>Just get out of it. And if you want to

0:48:41.440 --> 0:48:43.120
<v Speaker 2>do it nicely, do it nicely. And if you want

0:48:43.120 --> 0:48:44.040
<v Speaker 2>to just leave it, leave it.

0:48:44.080 --> 0:48:44.560
<v Speaker 1>Who cares.

0:48:44.680 --> 0:48:47.360
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, it's not a huge life decision. Just you know,

0:48:47.480 --> 0:48:49.120
<v Speaker 2>make your life a little bit more simpler.

0:48:49.239 --> 0:48:53.239
<v Speaker 6>I also think that if you're feeling this way, a

0:48:53.280 --> 0:48:55.279
<v Speaker 6>lot of people in that group tat are feeling this way,

0:48:55.400 --> 0:48:58.480
<v Speaker 6>the fact that it's been lingering for years and people

0:48:58.480 --> 0:49:01.760
<v Speaker 6>are like it's like dusty comments of like hey guys,

0:49:01.920 --> 0:49:04.120
<v Speaker 6>like got back from walking the kid and like me

0:49:04.160 --> 0:49:06.200
<v Speaker 6>and my husband haven't had sex and three months like

0:49:06.239 --> 0:49:08.400
<v Speaker 6>any like get the fuck out of here. Just I

0:49:08.400 --> 0:49:09.960
<v Speaker 6>think you should leave her. I agree, just like leave

0:49:09.960 --> 0:49:12.160
<v Speaker 6>a little note like super busy, wish you all the best,

0:49:12.239 --> 0:49:13.080
<v Speaker 6>like love you guys.

0:49:13.160 --> 0:49:16.839
<v Speaker 4>Yeah, yeah, yep, this line is for work.

0:49:16.880 --> 0:49:19.200
<v Speaker 3>Calls love you bye, piece it and then your other

0:49:19.239 --> 0:49:21.239
<v Speaker 3>friend can leave and the other six girls who are

0:49:21.280 --> 0:49:24.759
<v Speaker 3>not the three girls who keep totally totally well, there

0:49:24.760 --> 0:49:27.040
<v Speaker 3>you go, as Alexandra.

0:49:27.160 --> 0:49:28.080
<v Speaker 1>You're not your full name.

0:49:28.160 --> 0:49:28.920
<v Speaker 6>It is Alexander.

0:49:28.920 --> 0:49:30.480
<v Speaker 2>Would be so funny if it wasn't, and I just

0:49:30.560 --> 0:49:32.879
<v Speaker 2>kept calling you alex Now it is. Okay, We're gonna

0:49:32.880 --> 0:49:34.279
<v Speaker 2>take a quick break and we'll be right back.

0:49:38.320 --> 0:49:38.919
<v Speaker 1>And we're back.

0:49:39.400 --> 0:49:41.880
<v Speaker 3>All right, Well we're here to wrap up. But Alex

0:49:41.880 --> 0:49:43.920
<v Speaker 3>do you have any advice you'd like from Chelsea?

0:49:44.560 --> 0:49:47.840
<v Speaker 6>Oh my gosh, I actually think we can expand a

0:49:47.840 --> 0:49:50.480
<v Speaker 6>little bit on I know you started Chelsea Lately and

0:49:50.520 --> 0:49:54.239
<v Speaker 6>it was gossip and celebrities and obviously comedy, and then

0:49:54.280 --> 0:49:58.920
<v Speaker 6>as your career progressed, you started getting vocal about things

0:49:58.960 --> 0:50:01.440
<v Speaker 6>that mattered and that you can about. And I can

0:50:01.560 --> 0:50:03.759
<v Speaker 6>assume that there were some people probably that were like,

0:50:03.800 --> 0:50:06.040
<v Speaker 6>staying your lane, bitch, just make us laugh and shut.

0:50:05.800 --> 0:50:06.359
<v Speaker 1>The fuck up.

0:50:07.239 --> 0:50:09.120
<v Speaker 6>I love how like say that so casually, I'm like,

0:50:09.120 --> 0:50:11.640
<v Speaker 6>that's the exact quotes that I've been getting lately. How

0:50:11.680 --> 0:50:14.480
<v Speaker 6>did you handle that? And like, did it did it?

0:50:14.520 --> 0:50:16.319
<v Speaker 6>Do you think it affected your career in any way?

0:50:17.200 --> 0:50:19.399
<v Speaker 2>Well, when I got really political, yeah, I'm so sure

0:50:19.440 --> 0:50:21.399
<v Speaker 2>it had a negative impact on my career because people

0:50:21.520 --> 0:50:23.480
<v Speaker 2>I was when when Trump got elected, I just could

0:50:23.480 --> 0:50:26.680
<v Speaker 2>not I was just at my I just lost it,

0:50:26.800 --> 0:50:29.000
<v Speaker 2>Like I mean, I was so angry that this country

0:50:29.040 --> 0:50:30.960
<v Speaker 2>could elect such a buffoon that I.

0:50:30.920 --> 0:50:31.680
<v Speaker 1>Couldn't deal with it.

0:50:31.760 --> 0:50:33.880
<v Speaker 2>And I'm sure that it did have a negative impact

0:50:33.920 --> 0:50:37.120
<v Speaker 2>on my career because my manager told me, you're ruining

0:50:37.160 --> 0:50:40.080
<v Speaker 2>your career, But I didn't care because you know, I

0:50:41.480 --> 0:50:44.000
<v Speaker 2>believe in myself and I knew that this was more

0:50:44.040 --> 0:50:44.560
<v Speaker 2>important to me.

0:50:44.640 --> 0:50:47.440
<v Speaker 1>That was the most paramount thing. People still say that

0:50:47.480 --> 0:50:48.080
<v Speaker 1>to me today.

0:50:48.160 --> 0:50:50.520
<v Speaker 2>People still say, oh, you used to be funny before

0:50:50.560 --> 0:50:52.239
<v Speaker 2>you got into politics. It's like, bitch, I have a

0:50:52.239 --> 0:50:55.040
<v Speaker 2>special coming out on December twenty seventh. It's fucking and

0:50:55.080 --> 0:50:57.480
<v Speaker 2>I just got nominated for a Grammy for my last special,

0:50:57.640 --> 0:50:59.840
<v Speaker 2>So I'm still fucking funny. Aw So, I actually a

0:51:00.120 --> 0:51:02.719
<v Speaker 2>multidimensional and I can care about a million different things

0:51:02.760 --> 0:51:04.680
<v Speaker 2>at the same time. And I would challenge you to

0:51:04.719 --> 0:51:07.200
<v Speaker 2>do the fucking same thing instead of thinking that people

0:51:07.280 --> 0:51:09.799
<v Speaker 2>are here for one purpose and one purpose only. We

0:51:09.880 --> 0:51:13.799
<v Speaker 2>have a multitude of things to offer and everybody's multi dimensional.

0:51:14.160 --> 0:51:16.719
<v Speaker 2>And whenever I see comments like that now, it just

0:51:16.800 --> 0:51:20.600
<v Speaker 2>makes me want to be louder about the things. Negative

0:51:20.920 --> 0:51:24.560
<v Speaker 2>comments about me are irrelevant. They're just irrelevant. I've spent

0:51:24.640 --> 0:51:26.960
<v Speaker 2>too much time in the public eye to let that

0:51:27.040 --> 0:51:27.560
<v Speaker 2>affect me.

0:51:27.840 --> 0:51:29.719
<v Speaker 1>I'm not here for the people that don't like me.

0:51:29.800 --> 0:51:30.920
<v Speaker 1>I'm here for the people that do.

0:51:31.600 --> 0:51:34.160
<v Speaker 6>I love that because I obviously look up to you

0:51:34.200 --> 0:51:38.320
<v Speaker 6>so much, and I have been obviously lightly stepping into

0:51:38.360 --> 0:51:41.000
<v Speaker 6>just talking about things that matter. My first thing was

0:51:41.040 --> 0:51:43.200
<v Speaker 6>literally human rights, and everyone's like, what the fuck, you

0:51:43.200 --> 0:51:45.640
<v Speaker 6>little slut, you're getting political? Tell us how to fuck

0:51:45.640 --> 0:51:48.600
<v Speaker 6>a dick, And I'm like, oh my god, I'm like, relax.

0:51:49.120 --> 0:51:52.359
<v Speaker 6>It's so frustrating to see how angry people get when

0:51:52.400 --> 0:51:54.920
<v Speaker 6>you step out of your lane. And it doesn't fully

0:51:54.960 --> 0:51:57.680
<v Speaker 6>bother me, but it's more just frustrating to see how

0:51:57.719 --> 0:52:01.000
<v Speaker 6>closed minded people are and how enable they are to

0:52:01.080 --> 0:52:03.279
<v Speaker 6>listen to something that actually will fucking affect them. Like

0:52:03.320 --> 0:52:06.239
<v Speaker 6>the amount of women that were like, why are you

0:52:06.280 --> 0:52:08.200
<v Speaker 6>getting political? I'm like, do you not want to have

0:52:08.239 --> 0:52:11.640
<v Speaker 6>an abortion? If you don't want the baby? Like what

0:52:11.680 --> 0:52:13.160
<v Speaker 6>are we up to over here, ladies.

0:52:13.200 --> 0:52:15.920
<v Speaker 3>It's also such bullshit to be like, that's your lane.

0:52:15.960 --> 0:52:18.160
<v Speaker 3>Your lane is you only get to talk about sex stuff.

0:52:18.200 --> 0:52:20.719
<v Speaker 2>I do only like that your lane. No one has

0:52:20.760 --> 0:52:24.520
<v Speaker 2>one lane. That's so limiting. We're not here for one lane.

0:52:24.760 --> 0:52:25.360
<v Speaker 2>We're swerving.

0:52:25.520 --> 0:52:28.400
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, yeah, we're swerving. Some of us are on the shoulder,

0:52:28.840 --> 0:52:30.759
<v Speaker 1>some of us are getting pulled over. You know, we

0:52:30.840 --> 0:52:33.919
<v Speaker 1>have ton tones so many lanes and not I feel

0:52:33.960 --> 0:52:34.839
<v Speaker 1>like is limiting too.

0:52:34.920 --> 0:52:37.120
<v Speaker 2>I remember Dax and Kristen we were talking about that

0:52:37.160 --> 0:52:39.520
<v Speaker 2>because Dax is like, just stay in your lane, and

0:52:39.800 --> 0:52:42.759
<v Speaker 2>at I could understand the validity of that because she

0:52:42.840 --> 0:52:46.440
<v Speaker 2>was comparing herself to other actresses writing different opportunities. But

0:52:46.480 --> 0:52:48.560
<v Speaker 2>at the same time, I'm like, well, no, that's limiting.

0:52:48.960 --> 0:52:51.319
<v Speaker 2>None of us have one lane. We all have things

0:52:51.320 --> 0:52:54.960
<v Speaker 2>to offer and let people. It's important to care about

0:52:55.040 --> 0:52:56.640
<v Speaker 2>other people than yourself.

0:52:57.000 --> 0:52:57.880
<v Speaker 1>And I think when you're.

0:52:57.760 --> 0:53:02.400
<v Speaker 2>Outspoken about anything political or anything that's happening in society.

0:53:02.000 --> 0:53:02.399
<v Speaker 1>You are.

0:53:02.800 --> 0:53:06.600
<v Speaker 2>I feel very responsible and like it's mandatory. I feel

0:53:06.600 --> 0:53:10.520
<v Speaker 2>that way. So yeah, I just so yeah, well, father Cooper,

0:53:10.719 --> 0:53:11.840
<v Speaker 2>you did a great job today.

0:53:12.040 --> 0:53:16.520
<v Speaker 1>I mean, you're a real solid addition to this podcast. Yeah, guys,

0:53:18.040 --> 0:53:18.600
<v Speaker 1>I mean.

0:53:18.840 --> 0:53:21.200
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, we're gonna call you when we have a cancelation

0:53:21.480 --> 0:53:23.160
<v Speaker 2>and we're just gonna come over to your house.

0:53:23.640 --> 0:53:25.200
<v Speaker 1>Are you still living in that house that I came

0:53:25.239 --> 0:53:26.960
<v Speaker 1>to you? I'm not good. I'm doing.

0:53:27.080 --> 0:53:29.319
<v Speaker 2>You came what I had, have a pocketing spot? I

0:53:29.360 --> 0:53:31.279
<v Speaker 2>was like, do you have a driveway? She's like not

0:53:31.320 --> 0:53:33.760
<v Speaker 2>really like what I had nothing.

0:53:33.840 --> 0:53:35.680
<v Speaker 6>I was mortified. And you would sit on the couch

0:53:35.719 --> 0:53:37.040
<v Speaker 6>and you couldn't get comfortable, and you wear in your

0:53:37.120 --> 0:53:40.160
<v Speaker 6>dress the whole thing. No, I'm I have a different place.

0:53:40.160 --> 0:53:41.840
<v Speaker 6>Now you should come over. You should come on collar daddie.

0:53:41.960 --> 0:53:42.440
<v Speaker 1>Let's do it.

0:53:42.520 --> 0:53:44.960
<v Speaker 6>Let's do it. It'll be so fun. Yeah, everyone loves you.

0:53:45.000 --> 0:53:46.560
<v Speaker 6>When you came on, it was amazing.

0:53:46.560 --> 0:53:48.200
<v Speaker 1>Oh well, this will be an even better interview now

0:53:48.239 --> 0:53:49.000
<v Speaker 1>than I know who you are.

0:53:49.880 --> 0:53:53.040
<v Speaker 6>You won't up high or you will.

0:53:52.880 --> 0:53:54.160
<v Speaker 1>We'll get high together.

0:53:54.600 --> 0:53:55.600
<v Speaker 6>You should do an episode.

0:53:56.040 --> 0:53:56.719
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, let's do it.

0:53:56.880 --> 0:53:57.400
<v Speaker 6>I'll love it.

0:53:57.840 --> 0:54:01.640
<v Speaker 1>I love it. Okay, thank you Alex Cooper, We love you.

0:54:02.080 --> 0:54:03.000
<v Speaker 6>Thank you, guys.

0:54:03.040 --> 0:54:06.480
<v Speaker 1>Thanks Catherine all. Thanks, don't forget to watch my special

0:54:06.520 --> 0:54:09.560
<v Speaker 1>on Netflix. You guys. Revolution, It's a revolution.

0:54:10.440 --> 0:54:12.439
<v Speaker 4>So if you'd like advice from Chelsea.

0:54:12.560 --> 0:54:15.799
<v Speaker 3>Just send us an email at Dear Chelsea podcast at

0:54:15.800 --> 0:54:20.080
<v Speaker 3>gmail dot com. Dear Chelsea is a production of iHeartRadio,

0:54:20.560 --> 0:54:24.239
<v Speaker 3>executive produced by Nick Stuff, produced by Catherine Law, and

0:54:24.440 --> 0:54:26.600
<v Speaker 3>edited and engineered by Brad Dickert.