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Speaker 1: Hello, and welcome to my favorite murder.

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Speaker 2: That's Georgia Hart's Dark.

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Speaker 1: That's care kill Gera. This is the miniso, the minisod.

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Speaker 1: We don't do it this way, but we're doing it anyway.

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Speaker 2: Listen. You don't tell us what we do or how

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Speaker 2: we do it, well, you just fucking do it. Can

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Speaker 2: you tell that I blue dry my hair in the

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Speaker 2: car with the windows rolled down today because it's so hot.

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Speaker 1: It's curly, it's cute, it's so curly.

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Speaker 2: I let it curl on up because I was.

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Speaker 1: Like, I can't get it done. I like that. Did

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Speaker 1: you tell I didn't wash my hair for fucking bays?

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Speaker 2: Can you tell I'm living on dry shampoo?

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Speaker 1: Of course?

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Speaker 2: Okay, I'm not going to read you the subject line

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Speaker 2: of this email, Georgia. I'm just going to start it,

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Speaker 2: and it starts Hello, MFM crew pets included. I wanted

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Speaker 2: to write in for a while, but I didn't have

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Speaker 2: a story that I could tell, mostly because the who

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Speaker 2: told me their stories wouldn't give me permission. Fair my

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Speaker 2: dad now retired from the US government. Don't worry, I'm

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Speaker 2: working on it. Oh come, due to my dad's job,

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Speaker 2: my family and I moved around a lot while I

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Speaker 2: was growing up. When I was in high school, we

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Speaker 2: were living in Columbia. Like many fifteen year olds, I

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Speaker 2: was a babysitter at that time for a couple kids

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Speaker 2: that lived in my building. One night, I was babysitting

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Speaker 2: three kids and my two younger sisters. One of the

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Speaker 2: kids asked me if we could do something fun. The

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Speaker 2: little girl, who asked nine years old, so classic?

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Speaker 1: Can we do something about and fun?

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Speaker 2: Ben asked me in her cute little kid voice, if

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Speaker 2: we could call the Jonas brothers. I let her know

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Speaker 2: that I did not personally know the Jonas brothers and

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Speaker 2: could not call them, but she insisted.

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Speaker 1: What was I to do?

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Speaker 2: So the kids and I started googling the Jonas brother's

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Speaker 2: phone numbers. While I didn't actually expect their numbers to

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Speaker 2: be on the internet, I did think it best we

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Speaker 2: would run into a phone number that fans could call into,

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Speaker 2: which I knew some bands had at one point in time.

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Speaker 2: At the worst, we would prank call somebody, which is

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Speaker 2: all so fun. That's when you're getting your babysitter hat on. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: but no, Karen and Georgia, neither of these scenarios was

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Speaker 2: what happened next. After ten to fifteen minutes of googling

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Speaker 2: and finding a fan page with no phone number, we

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Speaker 2: finally found a thread of fan discussions on what I

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Speaker 2: know now to be good old Reddit. There was a

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Speaker 2: listed number where fans call in and leave messages. So

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Speaker 2: I dialed the ten digit phone number ending in nine

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Speaker 2: one one. No, it did not ring alarm bells to me,

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Speaker 2: pun intended that the last three digits were nine one one. However,

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Speaker 2: when the woman on the other end answered the phone

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Speaker 2: saying nine to one one, what's your emergency? I knew

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Speaker 2: I made a mistake. So, like any kid would, I

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Speaker 2: hung up and told the little girl it was a

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Speaker 2: wrong number and we should go watch a movie instead. Oops, yep,

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Speaker 2: don't take care of it. Run away. But then the

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Speaker 2: phone started ringing. I yelled to my sisters in the

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Speaker 2: other room not to answer it, but it went off again.

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Speaker 1: Oh my god.

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Speaker 2: I looked at the eleven year old brother, who, unlike

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Speaker 2: the little ones, knew the mistake we had made. Now

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Speaker 2: it's we I had no other choice but to run

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Speaker 2: around the house and unplug each landline Skype.

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Speaker 1: For just compounding it.

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Speaker 2: I had no other choice, had no other choice. I

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Speaker 2: had no other choice. Is the beginning of everybody's autobiography

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Speaker 2: of fucked up shit they did or just like you

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Speaker 2: had literally a million other choices, Karen. After that, we

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Speaker 2: watched a movie and pretended the events of the evening

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Speaker 2: never happened. My parents and the kids' parents came home

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Speaker 2: shortly after, and everything was fine. No one said anything

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Speaker 2: about our night's activities, and I plug the phones back

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Speaker 2: in before going to bed. I want to note that

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Speaker 2: while living overseas, we did in fact have a phone

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Speaker 2: with a US number. It was a Skype phone with

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Speaker 2: a US number attached to it. Now, in order to

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Speaker 2: have a US based number, it has to be connected

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Speaker 2: to a US address. So the next morning, my mother

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Speaker 2: sat down at the dining room table after getting off

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Speaker 2: the phone and turned to my dad and sisters and I, saying,

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Speaker 2: the most wild thing happened when Grandma got home from

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Speaker 2: ballet last night. The police were surrounding her house.

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Speaker 1: Oh no, back in the US. Oh no.

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Speaker 2: I had forgotten that the address attached to our phone

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Speaker 2: was my grandmother's. The police asked if she was all right,

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Speaker 2: saying a nine one one call had been tracked back

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Speaker 2: to her address. Luckily, my grandma had been out all evening,

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Speaker 2: so they just chalked it up to a misunderstanding.

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Speaker 1: Hold on, grandma was at ballet.

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Speaker 2: Grandma was at ballet. If not teaching.

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Speaker 1: Ballets, it's probably a young grandma, young hip grandma, a

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Speaker 1: young hip hop. I bet she has hip hop on Tuesdays,

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Speaker 1: ballet on Wednesdays, modern daughter yas zoom zoom by Friday.

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Speaker 2: And then it's church all weekend. I bet you're wondering

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Speaker 2: if in that moment I confess to the call. No,

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Speaker 2: of course I didn't. It was only many years later,

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Speaker 2: as an adult drinking wine with my parents that I

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Speaker 2: told them the real story of what happened. They took

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Speaker 2: it well, but that could have been the wine. Thank

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Speaker 2: you for all that you and the exactly right team do.

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Speaker 2: And shout out to my friend Leah, who I got

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Speaker 2: hooked onto the podcast. Yeah, it's not a thank you

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Speaker 2: to Leah forgetting them right on the podcast. It's so

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Speaker 2: you're welcome.

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Speaker 1: Thank You're welcome, Leah.

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Speaker 2: Stay sexy, and don't google celebrity phone numbers. They're almost

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Speaker 2: always wrong, Kendle.

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Speaker 1: Somefucker put that number and read it and was like,

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Speaker 1: call this number.

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Speaker 2: Try hear nine one one.

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Speaker 1: I definitely called new Kids on the block, you know,

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Speaker 1: nine hundred line when I was a kid, and definitely

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Speaker 1: got in trouble for that.

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Speaker 2: What did you think you wanted to talk about or say?

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Speaker 1: I thought they'd fall in love with me if they knew.

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Speaker 1: They didn't know about me yet, so they hadn't fallen

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Speaker 1: in love with me. But if they finally knew about me,

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Speaker 1: then they'd be in love with me.

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Speaker 2: They would finally know the personality that they were waiting for.

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Speaker 1: Right And it's like this whole time, you've been writing

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Speaker 1: songs about me and you didn't even know it. You know,

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Speaker 1: I let them know.

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Speaker 2: Let me solve your yearning issue. The songs won't even

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Speaker 2: be necessary.

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Speaker 1: And surprise, it's me. I'm wearing fucking bicycle shorts and

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Speaker 1: a fucking.

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Speaker 2: And a choker and no, no, this is little Georgia

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Speaker 2: oversized water park shirt.

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Speaker 1: What was that one shirt called hypercolor shirt?

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Speaker 2: Oh?

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Speaker 1: Yes, okay, for the first time ever in my life,

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Speaker 1: actually I have reading glasses. The last of my family,

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Speaker 1: the last Jewish person.

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Speaker 2: Let's build it up a little bit, ladies and gentlemen.

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Speaker 2: Georgia Hardstark is going from twenty twenty vision to now

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Speaker 2: what is it twenty thirty five? Does it go higher

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Speaker 2: or lower?

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Speaker 1: I think it was higher. It's still really.

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Speaker 2: Good, but it's just not good to be twenty forty.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, so here we go.

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Speaker 2: If you just work on it, maybe you can get back.

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Speaker 1: How do you clean these?

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Speaker 2: Just you wipe them on your T shirt? Is what

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Speaker 2: I would say, but that any optometrists would be furious

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Speaker 2: that I would be saying.

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Speaker 1: If I look stupid, I won't wear them because that's

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Speaker 1: what I care about. WHOA I see?

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Speaker 2: Right?

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Speaker 1: Holy shit, glasses work. I'm not going to read you

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Speaker 1: the subject line, but it's fucked. Oh don't look podcast besties.

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Speaker 1: I've never really considered writing in but when this happened,

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Speaker 1: I needed to tell you. My dad, Leroy died a

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Speaker 1: few weeks ago. He was eighty seven. We weren't close.

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Speaker 1: Oh okay, doesn't care. My parents divorced when I was eight,

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Speaker 1: and he'd been remarried to my stepmom for over twenty years,

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Speaker 1: and while I would see them once or twice a year,

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Speaker 1: we didn't impact each other's daily lives.

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Speaker 2: Well, best case scenario for a grief.

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Speaker 1: Situation, right, anyone can be a parent cut to my

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Speaker 1: dad's funeral. I had barely walked in and signed the

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Speaker 1: guest book when an older gentleman just behind me reading

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Speaker 1: my name, boomed, you're Adam and shook my hand to

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Speaker 1: introduce himself and his wife. I'm Fred. I was a

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Speaker 1: coworker and friend of your dad's. I could hardly get

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Speaker 1: a word in. He enthusiastically told me work stories and

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Speaker 1: how the two couples had traveled to the British Virgin

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Speaker 1: Islands and sailed at Cadmaran together.

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Speaker 2: Wow.

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Speaker 1: Fred was excited to send me his photos once he

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Speaker 1: got home, so he typed his email address into my

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Speaker 1: phone and I pushed send. I excuse myself to visit,

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Speaker 1: with a parade of long unseen relatives, making my way

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Speaker 1: into the chapel, my dad's open casket at the head

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Speaker 1: of the room. As the service began, I settled into

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Speaker 1: the front row seat next to my siblings. The chaplain

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Speaker 1: called for anyone who'd like to speak, and Fred stepped forward.

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Speaker 1: This is a cell of he proclaimed, followed by his

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Speaker 1: work and catamaran stories. Fred mentioned how he and my

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Speaker 1: dad would often meet up for lunch to one up

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Speaker 1: each other's travel stories. His speech close with God speed leroy,

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Speaker 1: and hold the door open for the rest of us.

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Speaker 1: Fred walked back to his seat a few rows behind me.

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Speaker 1: My stepmom followed and had only taken the podium for

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Speaker 1: a few minutes when a series of loud and terrible

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Speaker 1: noises echoed. Then it says, yack, yack, yack. The service

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Speaker 1: halted and everyone's head turned towards the sound. Is Fred okay,

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Speaker 1: my stepmom asked to the bewildered room. Fred had slumped

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Speaker 1: forward in his pew and the noises had stopped. Subdued

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Speaker 1: panic ensued. Two men lifted and carried Fred to the

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Speaker 1: central aisle between the pews, laid him on the floor,

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Speaker 1: and started CPR as we waited for paramedics to arrive.

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Speaker 1: Oh no, Fred was unresponsive. This is called death at

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Speaker 1: a funeral.

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Speaker 2: Oh my okay, I'm so sorry. I was confused because

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Speaker 2: when you said yak yak yak, I thought Fred was

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Speaker 2: like heckling the stepmother, where I'm like.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, yes, Oh my god. A trio paramedics assembled a

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Speaker 1: stretcher under Fred and placed a compression machine over his

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Speaker 1: chest and started an IV. As the medics wheeled Fred

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Speaker 1: down the aisle, his wife field, don't stop that machine,

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Speaker 1: and they were all gone, leaving us mourners paralyzed in shock.

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Speaker 2: What would you even do?

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Speaker 1: Right? I looked at the funeral home employees for guidance,

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Speaker 1: wondering do we keep going? Do we reschedule the funeral?

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Speaker 1: How long do we have this place for? Is there

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Speaker 1: a funeral? After us? A cousin took the podium and

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Speaker 1: took charge and the funeral was back on track. Following

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Speaker 1: more speeches, prayers, and songs, my dad's casket was wheeled

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Speaker 1: into the back of a hearse. As the chaplain was

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Speaker 1: giving the final prayer for my father at the grave site,

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Speaker 1: he announced that we would also have a separate prayer

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Speaker 1: for Fred, who didn't make it.

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Speaker 2: Oh my god.

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Speaker 1: He followed. He's like, I'm gonna leave the door open

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Speaker 1: for us, and Lero was like, gotcha.

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Speaker 2: And if it was movie, yeah, he would be walking

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Speaker 2: back to his seat and like sit down and be

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Speaker 2: like hey, buddy, he'd be like what.

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Speaker 1: I guess Fred had pulled the ultimate one up on

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Speaker 1: my dad by all caps dying at his funeral, because

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Speaker 1: he remember, he was saying, how they do one up

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Speaker 1: stories about their trips. Yeah, the ultimate trip. I hope

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Speaker 1: my dad quote held the door open for him. The

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Speaker 1: last email in my phone was to Fred, who had

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Speaker 1: promised to send me photos, a somber reminder that time

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Speaker 1: is never guaranteed. Stay sexy and hold the door open, Adam.

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Speaker 2: He him, Adam like, oh my god, I love that

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Speaker 2: this happened.

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Speaker 1: And the first thing he thought was I have to

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Speaker 1: tell Karen in Georgia about it.

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Speaker 2: I mean, I would say absolutely that funeral goes on, yeah,

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Speaker 2: because that isn't the thing that's finalizing and making anything.

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Speaker 2: It's just an observation and you're still you're observing it,

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Speaker 2: maybe even more.

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Speaker 1: And he wasn't dead yet, like he wasn't fully.

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Speaker 2: They didn't pronounce that.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, So you got to keep going.

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Speaker 2: You just got to keep going in in the gray,

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Speaker 2: Adam Zad.

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Speaker 1: Gave him a gift when he left, which is a story.

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Speaker 2: For the mini sound that story. But then also it

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Speaker 2: is a nice idea because I've heard many, and like

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Speaker 2: even in our family stories about people coming to get

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Speaker 2: other people. So you know, Fred got picked up totally.

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Speaker 1: I love it.

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Speaker 2: What if he's like, no, I can't go, it's my funeral.

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Speaker 2: I'm sitting over here, I'm trying to listen to my compliments. Okay,

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Speaker 2: the subject line of this email is red Flags and

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Speaker 2: online Dating. Greetings to Frank and only Frank.

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Speaker 3: About six years ago, I was engaged in the world

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Speaker 3: of online dating, and then a parenthesies that says, yikes,

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Speaker 3: ninety nine percent of the time, I did all the

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Speaker 3: smart things.

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Speaker 2: Only meet in public places, don't tell people my number

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Speaker 2: or address until I get to know them in person,

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Speaker 2: have an escape plan, et cetera. Then I started talking

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Speaker 2: to this one guy and we hit it off instantly.

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Speaker 2: After only about two days of messaging, I threw all

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Speaker 2: into the wind. That's what people do love For some reason,

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Speaker 2: For some reason, I decided that our first date should

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Speaker 2: be at my house. I told him my dress. I know,

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Speaker 2: I mean, that's the thing though, it's like, you're positive. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: I told him my dress. We exchanged numbers, and I

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Speaker 2: offered to make a fancy dinner. I mean, in all

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Speaker 2: the playbooks, are doing this as wrong as you can

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Speaker 2: for a date, at least, and you don't cook relevant information.

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Speaker 2: I live in farm country. Between my house and the

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Speaker 2: paved road are sprawling acres of corn and soybeans. On

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Speaker 2: one side of the gravel driveway and dense woods perfect

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Speaker 2: for burying evidence. On the other the cell services if

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Speaker 2: he had best, this is a fucking horror movie. My

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Speaker 2: date arrived just before dusk, called nervously from my driveway

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Speaker 2: and I literally said, haha, this is creepy. Please don't

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Speaker 2: be a murderer. He pulled up and I cheerfully invited

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Speaker 2: him inside. At that exact moment, as though we were

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Speaker 2: in the opening act of a horror movie, the power

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Speaker 2: on the entire property went out. A sane person would

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Speaker 2: have gotten right the fuck out of there, but instead

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Speaker 2: we stood outside awkwardly and visited my goats until it

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Speaker 2: got too dark to see. He was clearly about to

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Speaker 2: leave when the power came back on. I casually said, great,

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Speaker 2: come on in and we'll have dinner. No, just rolling

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Speaker 2: with whatever the electricity wants you to do. He agreed,

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Speaker 2: but as I recall, it was a very quiet meal.

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Speaker 2: To this day, I still don't know what was wrong

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Speaker 2: with either of us, and of course I would never

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Speaker 2: do this in a post MFM world. Yeah, I mean, hey,

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Speaker 2: it feels good. Anyway. We got married this past January

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Speaker 2: and just so perfectly done, just well done, and despite

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Speaker 2: our many bizarre hobbies. Neither of us has turned out

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Speaker 2: to be a catfishing murderer yet, Thanks for everything you do.

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Speaker 2: I finally started going to therapy a year ago, thanks

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Speaker 2: in part to your show Stay Sexy. And if you're

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Speaker 2: going to lure a stranger into a dark cornfield, make

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Speaker 2: sure it's your soulmate, Tasey Norton, thank you for a

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Speaker 2: beautiful email.

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Speaker 1: Casey, you still don't know if it's a long con. Ugh,

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Speaker 1: you know you sap.

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Speaker 2: You fell for it in the five year schemes.

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Speaker 1: Right, the five year serial Killer. Okay, I'm not gonna

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Speaker 1: read you this. I reckne of this one. This feels good.

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Speaker 1: I feel smart.

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Speaker 2: You're gonna start finessing how you take them off and

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Speaker 2: put them back on?

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Speaker 1: I'm rip them off. Yep. There's many classes companies who

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Speaker 1: want to sponsor us. Hi Amtha, longtime listener, full time

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Speaker 1: lover of the pod. Six years ago, I moved from

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Speaker 1: rural Massachusetts to New Orleans to escape my abusive X

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Speaker 1: and start over. One night, after a lovely evening with friends,

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Speaker 1: it was time to head home. I got in my

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Speaker 1: car but hadn't locked the doors. I turned up my

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Speaker 1: music pretty loud and was in my own world, unaware

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Speaker 1: someone had been watching me. A moment later, a man

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Speaker 1: in a face mask opened my passenger door, jumped in,

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Speaker 1: held a gun to my side, and demanded everything I had.

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Speaker 1: I guess I was pretty fed up with brazen men

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Speaker 1: that year, so I began screaming profanities at him with

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Speaker 1: an intensity and volume neither of us expected. This is

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Speaker 1: called what not to Do during a carjacking. That's very

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Speaker 1: is the subject on it of this one. He began

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Speaker 1: screaming back, demanding my cell phone. It was a crappy

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Speaker 1: old Android, but I was so broke and had just

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Speaker 1: paid it off, so I yelled, fuck you, no, I

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Speaker 1: need this phone. After more yelling, he gave up on

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Speaker 1: the phone and demanded my wallet. I yelled that I

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Speaker 1: had no cash and I was just going to cancel

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Speaker 1: my credit cards anyway. We both continued screaming at each other.

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Speaker 2: We were married this past January.

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Speaker 1: And now I was nearly blacked out on adrenaline and

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Speaker 1: Taylor Swift's I Think He Knows was still blasting full volume.

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Speaker 2: Oh that's very creepy.

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Speaker 1: It was all pretty over stimulating, to say the least.

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Speaker 1: When I got not carjacked, but like harassed by this

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Speaker 1: like this driver. It was like a road rage thing

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Speaker 1: where he came at me. I hadn't like turned down

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Speaker 1: what I was listening to. So Tina Fey's memoir Pants

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Speaker 1: Lasting on. I'm taking video of him because I'm terrified.

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Speaker 1: And all you hear is Tina fet his bossy pants

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Speaker 1: just blasting.

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Speaker 2: She's no crying in the workplace.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, my brain finally engaged and I thought, girl, what

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Speaker 1: are you doing arguing with this man? Just get out

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Speaker 1: of the car. So I pushed open my door and

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Speaker 1: ran about thirty feet before I realized he wasn't following me.

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Speaker 1: He just wanted my car. I stopped and watched him

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Speaker 1: slide into the driver's seat, ready to see my beloved

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Speaker 1: old Honda peel away. But nothing happened. I heard the

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Speaker 1: grinding of gears and realized he can't drive a stick shift.

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Speaker 1: You do you think you'd check that first? A carjacker would?

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Speaker 2: I think it's like this assumed thing, like they're so

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Speaker 2: rare anymore.

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Speaker 1: Man, carjackers right right in and let us know about

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Speaker 1: your tips and twigs.

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Speaker 2: So how you make these decisions?

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Speaker 1: Can you jump out of the car scream? You can

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Speaker 1: have it and sprint it away into the night. This

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Speaker 1: is so funny, but this is so terrifying and novel.

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Speaker 1: Lock your door the minute you get in, drive away,

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Speaker 1: don't start doing.

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Speaker 2: Someone wants your car, give them your.

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Speaker 1: Your car, your phone. You're quiet.

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Speaker 2: It's not cute to screams, but that's a I like that.

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Speaker 2: This person is like I did it wrong, and there's

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Speaker 2: other things going on, like an adrenaline rush, like this

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Speaker 2: is a situation where you can't always control and make

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Speaker 2: those decisions subjects.

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Speaker 1: That is literally what not to do during carjackings.

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Speaker 2: They know.

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Speaker 1: I called nine one because it seemed like the right

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Speaker 1: thing to do, but it's New Orleans. So it ring

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Speaker 1: for quite a while until a nice lady picked up.

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Speaker 1: After I explained what happened, the dispatcher laughed and said,

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Speaker 1: so he didn't take anything, and you're not hurt, and

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Speaker 1: he's gone, okay, my baby, Well you have a good night.

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Speaker 1: And that was that. That's so New Orleans baby. A

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Speaker 1: couple days later, I saw an advisory story on the

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Speaker 1: news about how to survive a carjacking. For future reference.

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Speaker 1: You should stay calm and not resist, especially if they

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Speaker 1: have a weapon. Get a gun, so I can't recommend

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Speaker 1: my method. I know I was lucky to get out

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Speaker 1: unharmed except for some light trauma to add to my collection,

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Speaker 1: Stay sexy, lock your doors, and if you're going to

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Speaker 1: do crime, at least learn how to drive a stick.

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Speaker 1: A in New Orleans a year or.

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Speaker 2: So, right, And you know what sucks about that too,

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00:17:56,720 --> 00:17:59,560
Speaker 2: is like we're correcting it on that side, but we're

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Speaker 2: also not A's experience is horrifying and not their fault.

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Speaker 2: And you know what I mean, being in that situation,

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Speaker 2: you can't You're not going like I'm going to either

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Speaker 2: choose A or B. It's like you just kind of

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Speaker 2: have a reaction.

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Speaker 1: I mean, it's all it's all on. Taylor Swift really.

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Speaker 2: Really comes back and when the lawsuit is served.

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Speaker 1: To us for saying that, for defamation.

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Speaker 2: Directly to us, Okay, my last one is a delight.

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Speaker 2: I'm not going to read you the subject line. It says, hello, chickadees,

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Speaker 2: I love you, but I hope you already know that. Okay,

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Speaker 2: Onto the story, perfect Perfect. When I was nine years old,

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Speaker 2: my brother entered a contest on something called Speaker's Corner

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Speaker 2: in Vancouver, British Columbia now I heard about these from

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Speaker 2: my Canadian friends when they moved to La in La was.

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Speaker 1: An old school thing. It's an old.

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Speaker 2: School thing from the news, but then they also did

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Speaker 2: it on Much Music, which is Canada's MTV. Yeah, okay,

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00:18:52,280 --> 00:18:55,679
Speaker 2: so listen to this Speaker's Corner. We had Speaker's Corner

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Speaker 2: booths all over Vancouver and the surrounding suburbs. They kind

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00:18:59,080 --> 00:19:01,760
Speaker 2: of look like ATM and you'd put in a tuney

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Speaker 2: a two dollars Canadian coin and record a message into

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Speaker 2: the booth for sixty seconds. Okay, so you just basically

412
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Speaker 2: got to go in there and be like, here's how

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Speaker 2: I feel. Highlights from the Speaker's Corner booths aired on

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Speaker 2: a TV show on our local news station every Friday night.

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00:19:16,640 --> 00:19:20,040
Speaker 2: You'd get a nice mixture of drunk women in BCBG skirts,

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Speaker 2: mediocre guitar playing, and people passing on messages to their

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Speaker 2: grandma's It's cute and then it says it was a

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00:19:25,760 --> 00:19:28,480
Speaker 2: big deal. I would watch that show all day and night.

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Speaker 1: Yeah.

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00:19:29,520 --> 00:19:32,439
Speaker 2: The news station announced a contest to celebrate the opening

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Speaker 2: of the Tower of Terror ride at Disneyland. To enter

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Speaker 2: the contest, you had to record a video at speaker's corner,

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00:19:38,840 --> 00:19:41,480
Speaker 2: pretending that you just got off the ride, talking about

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Speaker 2: what the trip was like. The winner would get an

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Speaker 2: all expense paid trip to Disneyland for their family on

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Speaker 2: opening weekend of the ride.

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Speaker 1: Wow.

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00:19:48,720 --> 00:19:51,440
Speaker 2: Then come on the local morning show following the trip

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Speaker 2: and report back, that's huge. My brother decided to enter,

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Speaker 2: so we went to the mall, got ice cream from

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Speaker 2: the food court, and then got down to business. My

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Speaker 2: twelve year old brother appo the booth with chocolate ice

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00:20:01,280 --> 00:20:04,119
Speaker 2: cream smeared across his face. He put in his tuny,

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00:20:04,200 --> 00:20:07,560
Speaker 2: waited for the recording countdown, then proceeded to say, Wow,

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Speaker 2: I just got off the Tower of tarat Disneyland, and man,

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Speaker 2: if your favorite saying is the family that bars together

437
00:20:13,280 --> 00:20:18,639
Speaker 2: stays together, you will love this ride. Okay bye, that

438
00:20:18,800 --> 00:20:19,399
Speaker 2: was his message.

439
00:20:19,440 --> 00:20:19,640
Speaker 1: Okay.

440
00:20:19,960 --> 00:20:22,000
Speaker 2: Fast forward a month or so and the news station

441
00:20:22,160 --> 00:20:24,120
Speaker 2: called my mom to share that my brother had made

442
00:20:24,119 --> 00:20:26,639
Speaker 2: it to the top ten and the winner would be

443
00:20:26,640 --> 00:20:29,359
Speaker 2: announced the next morning. We woke up early, sat right

444
00:20:29,400 --> 00:20:31,320
Speaker 2: in front of our TV and waited for them to

445
00:20:31,400 --> 00:20:34,760
Speaker 2: air the ten best submissions. To our surprise, there was

446
00:20:34,840 --> 00:20:37,560
Speaker 2: no top ten. They just said and the winner is

447
00:20:37,680 --> 00:20:40,680
Speaker 2: and his video flashed across the screen. Oh my god,

448
00:20:40,960 --> 00:20:44,199
Speaker 2: my brother one. We couldn't believe it. He was a

449
00:20:44,240 --> 00:20:48,320
Speaker 2: local celebrity, and then it just says, barf kid. We

450
00:20:48,320 --> 00:20:50,920
Speaker 2: were flown from Vancouver to Anaheim, put up at the

451
00:20:50,960 --> 00:20:54,479
Speaker 2: Disneyland Hotel, which is the best, and we got to

452
00:20:54,520 --> 00:20:57,480
Speaker 2: experience the park for the first time. We were camping

453
00:20:57,560 --> 00:21:00,240
Speaker 2: kids and hadn't stayed at a hotel that was a

454
00:21:00,280 --> 00:21:02,800
Speaker 2: Best Western before that trip, so this was a big deal.

455
00:21:03,240 --> 00:21:05,719
Speaker 2: Before the park opened, a little old man walked us

456
00:21:05,760 --> 00:21:07,879
Speaker 2: up to the front gates, took out a key and

457
00:21:08,000 --> 00:21:12,960
Speaker 2: let us in, What kind of Willy Wonka fucking bullshit

458
00:21:13,040 --> 00:21:15,280
Speaker 2: is that? Seriously, have you ever gotten to do that? Now?

459
00:21:15,680 --> 00:21:20,240
Speaker 2: And you're a citizen Havannah out of disneyling thing escorted

460
00:21:20,280 --> 00:21:25,080
Speaker 2: me out, Not in, ma'am. The park was completely empty

461
00:21:25,080 --> 00:21:27,879
Speaker 2: except for us and the camera crew. My brother started

462
00:21:27,880 --> 00:21:30,000
Speaker 2: to get super nervous. He wasn't sure if he wanted

463
00:21:30,040 --> 00:21:32,480
Speaker 2: to ride it, especially with a camera in his face

464
00:21:33,000 --> 00:21:35,840
Speaker 2: and the looming possibility of actual barf. He finally got

465
00:21:35,920 --> 00:21:37,600
Speaker 2: up the courage to get on the ride, and he

466
00:21:37,680 --> 00:21:40,159
Speaker 2: did not barf, but he didn't write it again. It

467
00:21:40,240 --> 00:21:42,800
Speaker 2: is a really good ride. When we returned from the trip,

468
00:21:42,880 --> 00:21:45,159
Speaker 2: he was a guest on the morning news show. The

469
00:21:45,200 --> 00:21:47,520
Speaker 2: anchor asked him what he thought of Tower of Terror,

470
00:21:47,560 --> 00:21:49,919
Speaker 2: clearly hoping that he'd give it a rave review. He

471
00:21:49,960 --> 00:21:52,879
Speaker 2: took a breath, looked at the camera and said, Eh,

472
00:21:52,920 --> 00:21:57,080
Speaker 2: it wasn't for me. I did a little reenact.

473
00:21:57,520 --> 00:21:58,200
Speaker 1: Yeah, that was great.

474
00:21:58,359 --> 00:22:01,919
Speaker 2: It wasn't for me a twelve year old, twelve year

475
00:22:01,960 --> 00:22:04,840
Speaker 2: old boy. We went back to Disneyland years later without

476
00:22:04,880 --> 00:22:08,439
Speaker 2: the cameras and back at old Faithful Best Western, and

477
00:22:08,480 --> 00:22:11,040
Speaker 2: we all rode Tower of Terror about six times in

478
00:22:11,080 --> 00:22:11,440
Speaker 2: a row.

479
00:22:11,560 --> 00:22:12,200
Speaker 1: We loved it.

480
00:22:12,480 --> 00:22:14,560
Speaker 2: Maybe it is true that the family that almost bursts

481
00:22:14,600 --> 00:22:17,320
Speaker 2: together stays together, stay sexy, and don't be afraid to

482
00:22:17,320 --> 00:22:21,680
Speaker 2: make your TV debut with ice cream on your face. Fiona, Wow,

483
00:22:21,720 --> 00:22:23,360
Speaker 2: that's such a great gimmick.

484
00:22:23,640 --> 00:22:27,359
Speaker 1: I love that. So smart, so smart and so cute.

485
00:22:27,359 --> 00:22:30,240
Speaker 2: And it's so like, yeah, you got kids need to

486
00:22:30,280 --> 00:22:33,159
Speaker 2: remember for stuff like that. If they're giving away a trip,

487
00:22:33,520 --> 00:22:35,800
Speaker 2: get in there. They want to give it to a kid.

488
00:22:35,640 --> 00:22:37,240
Speaker 1: Too, totally. They don't want to give it to some

489
00:22:37,320 --> 00:22:39,639
Speaker 1: fucking n twenty three year old drunk guys.

490
00:22:39,880 --> 00:22:42,440
Speaker 2: Yeah, or some mom who's like, I'm going to choreograph

491
00:22:42,480 --> 00:22:44,320
Speaker 2: a dance and we'll I'll do it as a family.

492
00:22:44,960 --> 00:22:47,080
Speaker 1: Okay, I'm not going to read you this, Dear Karen

493
00:22:47,119 --> 00:22:49,919
Speaker 1: and Georgia. This is a story about my stepdad, Joe.

494
00:22:50,440 --> 00:22:53,280
Speaker 1: Joe is a and then it's in title thought snack

495
00:22:53,440 --> 00:22:57,400
Speaker 1: enthusiast Me too, Me too, always having a chocolate bar

496
00:22:57,520 --> 00:22:59,800
Speaker 1: or bag of crisps shoved down the side of the

497
00:23:00,320 --> 00:23:02,040
Speaker 1: and it says, one time, as a teenager, I got

498
00:23:02,040 --> 00:23:03,879
Speaker 1: off the couch and had a whole twig stuck to

499
00:23:03,920 --> 00:23:07,840
Speaker 1: my thought, sorry, stuck to my tights. Gross. He also

500
00:23:07,920 --> 00:23:13,520
Speaker 1: has a disagreed it's excited feel a lot worse than that. Yeah,

501
00:23:13,560 --> 00:23:16,280
Speaker 1: for real. He also has a million stories about almost

502
00:23:16,320 --> 00:23:18,880
Speaker 1: being jumped in Glasgow in the eighties, and this one

503
00:23:18,920 --> 00:23:22,040
Speaker 1: is my favorite. Glasgow in the eighties was a dangerious

504
00:23:22,200 --> 00:23:23,399
Speaker 1: fucking place to be.

505
00:23:23,760 --> 00:23:26,520
Speaker 2: Listen. There's some of the best people in yeld in Glasgow.

506
00:23:26,600 --> 00:23:29,600
Speaker 2: But they were having a serious Heroin problem around that.

507
00:23:29,600 --> 00:23:33,360
Speaker 1: Time, Heroin and British people problem. Yeah. Yeah, they were

508
00:23:33,359 --> 00:23:35,879
Speaker 1: not happy about either of them. One night, when he

509
00:23:35,960 --> 00:23:37,880
Speaker 1: was in his early twenties, he was walking home through

510
00:23:37,920 --> 00:23:40,840
Speaker 1: a bad area and bought a Mars bar for the journey,

511
00:23:41,119 --> 00:23:43,760
Speaker 1: and then it says I believe UK mars Bar equals

512
00:23:43,960 --> 00:23:45,040
Speaker 1: US Milky.

513
00:23:44,720 --> 00:23:47,000
Speaker 2: Way, that's correct, I can confirm, okay.

514
00:23:47,200 --> 00:23:49,440
Speaker 1: Unwrapping the Mars Bar, he noticed a group of people

515
00:23:49,520 --> 00:23:51,680
Speaker 1: up ahead, but only realized too late that they were

516
00:23:51,680 --> 00:23:54,240
Speaker 1: the type to land you in the hospital for literally

517
00:23:54,320 --> 00:23:56,440
Speaker 1: any reason if you encountered them.

518
00:23:56,800 --> 00:23:59,680
Speaker 2: Can I hooligan's what hooligans? And also just to give

519
00:23:59,680 --> 00:24:02,320
Speaker 2: a little perspective, and I probably said this already, but

520
00:24:02,800 --> 00:24:04,760
Speaker 2: I did get to live in Glasgow for three months,

521
00:24:05,280 --> 00:24:07,639
Speaker 2: and there was a thing there with the young people.

522
00:24:07,640 --> 00:24:10,120
Speaker 2: When they would go out to clubs. You didn't wear

523
00:24:10,119 --> 00:24:12,960
Speaker 2: a jacket no matter how cold it was outside. You

524
00:24:13,040 --> 00:24:15,439
Speaker 2: had to look like hard, like you could just withstand

525
00:24:15,480 --> 00:24:17,800
Speaker 2: the weather. So girls would be standing outside in like

526
00:24:17,880 --> 00:24:21,080
Speaker 2: forty degree weather in you know, just like standing there

527
00:24:21,119 --> 00:24:23,000
Speaker 2: in their dress, like acting like they weren't cold.

528
00:24:23,080 --> 00:24:24,199
Speaker 1: Did I see a lot of fights?

529
00:24:24,680 --> 00:24:28,520
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, I mean the post club scene at the

530
00:24:28,560 --> 00:24:34,040
Speaker 2: local Chinese place was incredible, Wow, incredible viewing, God, amazing.

531
00:24:34,240 --> 00:24:37,280
Speaker 1: So they became aware of him and started circling and

532
00:24:37,359 --> 00:24:40,879
Speaker 1: hurling abuse at him. Joe, knowing that he was minutes

533
00:24:40,880 --> 00:24:43,720
Speaker 1: from having his head kicked in, felt his legs turned

534
00:24:43,720 --> 00:24:46,760
Speaker 1: to stone and he could not move. They accused Joe

535
00:24:46,840 --> 00:24:49,000
Speaker 1: of getting with one of their girlfriends so that they

536
00:24:49,040 --> 00:24:52,120
Speaker 1: had an excuse to jump him. Unable to speak, Joe

537
00:24:52,160 --> 00:24:55,199
Speaker 1: just kept on eating his mars bar. Now, Joe has

538
00:24:55,240 --> 00:24:57,800
Speaker 1: a very specific way of eating a mars bar that

539
00:24:57,840 --> 00:25:00,600
Speaker 1: begins with him nibbling the chocolate off all the sides

540
00:25:00,720 --> 00:25:03,800
Speaker 1: like a beaver, then peeling the caramel off with his

541
00:25:04,040 --> 00:25:08,240
Speaker 1: teeth before eating the remaining nugat. That's how I eat twigs.

542
00:25:08,480 --> 00:25:11,480
Speaker 1: Do you larry alone? I want to fucking in front

543
00:25:11,480 --> 00:25:17,040
Speaker 1: of anyone. So this is what he did while this

544
00:25:17,119 --> 00:25:20,800
Speaker 1: pack of hounds harassed him. Suddenly, miraculously, the guy's back

545
00:25:20,880 --> 00:25:23,399
Speaker 1: down and slouched off, probably to go beat up some

546
00:25:23,440 --> 00:25:26,720
Speaker 1: other sucker, And after finally getting feeling back in his legs,

547
00:25:26,800 --> 00:25:29,960
Speaker 1: Joe ran straight home. So he's just standing there in

548
00:25:30,040 --> 00:25:32,359
Speaker 1: this morn bar. The next morning, he was walking through

549
00:25:32,560 --> 00:25:35,960
Speaker 1: the Barra's, a big market in the east end of Glasgow,

550
00:25:36,359 --> 00:25:40,680
Speaker 1: the Bars Bush, where he kept passing people who shot

551
00:25:40,760 --> 00:25:43,520
Speaker 1: him a big thumbs up and nods of respect. He

552
00:25:43,560 --> 00:25:45,560
Speaker 1: had no idea what they were doing and just shrugged

553
00:25:45,560 --> 00:25:47,640
Speaker 1: it off until he met a friend that exclaimed you're

554
00:25:47,720 --> 00:25:51,800
Speaker 1: a mad bastard. When he saw Joe, confused, Joe asked

555
00:25:51,880 --> 00:25:54,200
Speaker 1: him what the fuck he was talking about. His friend replied,

556
00:25:54,480 --> 00:25:57,240
Speaker 1: quote eating a Mars bar like that when you're about

557
00:25:57,240 --> 00:26:01,359
Speaker 1: to get jumped exclamation mark. Apparently, when didn't respond to

558
00:26:01,400 --> 00:26:03,600
Speaker 1: their taunts and kept on eating his chocolate bar like

559
00:26:03,600 --> 00:26:06,320
Speaker 1: a beaver, the group had decided he was a stone

560
00:26:06,359 --> 00:26:11,240
Speaker 1: cold psychopath who wasn't worth crossing, and bounced before he

561
00:26:11,359 --> 00:26:14,520
Speaker 1: did them any damage, before going on to tell everyone

562
00:26:14,560 --> 00:26:16,439
Speaker 1: in town that he was not to be messed with.

563
00:26:16,720 --> 00:26:19,320
Speaker 2: Yes ideal situation.

564
00:26:20,119 --> 00:26:22,440
Speaker 1: Joe felt like a local celebrity all morning, and he

565
00:26:22,520 --> 00:26:24,960
Speaker 1: got to keep his kneecaps all around. A great day,

566
00:26:25,000 --> 00:26:28,800
Speaker 1: I imagine. Good job on the pod, heart SSDGM, good

567
00:26:28,880 --> 00:26:31,160
Speaker 1: job on the pod, Martha.

568
00:26:31,240 --> 00:26:33,360
Speaker 2: God Martha. Thank you well, Joe.

569
00:26:33,440 --> 00:26:38,359
Speaker 1: We say, I mean, just hi, Hi, what's up?

570
00:26:38,960 --> 00:26:41,080
Speaker 2: Also, if you were from Glasgow and you want to

571
00:26:41,119 --> 00:26:42,800
Speaker 2: tell us what it was really like in the eighties,

572
00:26:42,840 --> 00:26:44,760
Speaker 2: because we don't really know what we're talking about, we

573
00:26:45,680 --> 00:26:47,920
Speaker 2: that's always a given. Sure we would love to hear.

574
00:26:48,560 --> 00:26:50,760
Speaker 2: I mean, any stories of any kind.

575
00:26:50,680 --> 00:26:52,640
Speaker 1: At my favorite murder at Gmail. Send them in to us.

576
00:26:52,640 --> 00:26:55,080
Speaker 1: We need them. Please, this is what it happens.

577
00:26:55,160 --> 00:26:56,879
Speaker 2: This is what it is and we can't do it

578
00:26:56,880 --> 00:26:57,280
Speaker 2: without you.

579
00:26:57,359 --> 00:26:59,560
Speaker 1: Yeah, good job on the pod, Stay sexy and don't

580
00:26:59,560 --> 00:27:03,639
Speaker 1: get murder word. Goodbye, Elvis, Do you want to Cookie?

581
00:27:11,359 --> 00:27:13,080
Speaker 2: This has been an exactly right production.

582
00:27:13,200 --> 00:27:15,920
Speaker 1: Our senior producer is Molly Smith and our associate producer

583
00:27:15,960 --> 00:27:16,680
Speaker 1: is Tessa Hughes.

584
00:27:16,800 --> 00:27:18,720
Speaker 2: Our editor is Aristotle Ascevedo.

585
00:27:18,840 --> 00:27:20,960
Speaker 1: This episode was mixed by Leona Squalacci.

586
00:27:21,080 --> 00:27:23,879
Speaker 2: Email your hometowns to My Favorite Murder at gmail dot com.

587
00:27:23,880 --> 00:27:26,080
Speaker 1: Follow the show on Instagram at my Favorite Murder.

588
00:27:26,119 --> 00:27:28,720
Speaker 2: Listen to My Favorite Murder on the iHeartRadio app, Apple

589
00:27:28,800 --> 00:27:31,000
Speaker 2: Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts.

590
00:27:31,000 --> 00:27:33,200
Speaker 1: And now you can watch My Favorite Murder on Netflix.

591
00:27:33,400 --> 00:27:35,439
Speaker 2: And when you're there, hit the double thumbs up and

592
00:27:35,600 --> 00:27:37,640
Speaker 2: the remind Me buttons. That's the best way you can

593
00:27:37,680 --> 00:27:38,480
Speaker 2: support our show.

594
00:27:38,880 --> 00:27:40,600
Speaker 1: Goodbye,