WEBVTT - Tim Minchin 0:00:02.360 --> 0:00:05.440 I'm bad for the same reason because if someone asked 0:00:05.440 --> 0:00:07.120 me a question, I just answer it to the best 0:00:07.120 --> 0:00:11.119 of my ability one hundred. But if it's really a 0:00:11.200 --> 0:00:13.800 silly question, I'll go I'm not much good with those 0:00:13.840 --> 0:00:17.279 sorts of questions. What I need to be better is 0:00:17.320 --> 0:00:20.239 someone asked a good question and I think, oh, that's 0:00:20.280 --> 0:00:23.120 a good question. I'm going to unpack it, and now 0:00:23.320 --> 0:00:26.000 I don't. That's what gets me in trouble, because although 0:00:26.079 --> 0:00:27.520 you could look at it like this, and you could 0:00:27.520 --> 0:00:29.760 look at it like that, and then the press will go, 0:00:30.240 --> 0:00:31.960 he said that thing, and I'm like, no, I was. 0:00:32.479 --> 0:00:34.680 I was doing the thing I'm trying to do, which 0:00:34.760 --> 0:00:38.519 is to be self aware about my biases. A bit 0:00:38.560 --> 0:00:39.200 doesn't work out. 0:00:41.280 --> 0:00:45.320 Hello, I'm mini driver. I've always loved Proust's questionnaire. 0:00:45.840 --> 0:00:50.000 It was originally in nineteenth century parlor game where players 0:00:50.000 --> 0:00:53.440 would ask each other thirty five questions aimed at revealing 0:00:53.520 --> 0:00:57.240 the other player's true nature. In asking different people the 0:00:57.280 --> 0:01:00.680 same set of questions, you can make observations about which 0:01:00.720 --> 0:01:02.120 truths appear to be universal. 0:01:02.320 --> 0:01:02.959 And it made me. 0:01:02.920 --> 0:01:06.240 Wonder, what if these questions were just the jumping off point, 0:01:06.480 --> 0:01:09.400 what greater depths would be revealed if I asked these 0:01:09.480 --> 0:01:13.920 questions as conversation starters. So I adapted Pru's questionnaire and 0:01:13.959 --> 0:01:16.680 I wrote my own seven questions that I personally think 0:01:16.720 --> 0:01:19.800 are pertinent to a person's story. They are when and 0:01:19.840 --> 0:01:22.560 where were you happiest? What is the quality you like 0:01:22.680 --> 0:01:27.120 least about yourself? What relationship, real or fictionalized, defines love 0:01:27.160 --> 0:01:31.559 for you? What question would you most like answered, What person, place, 0:01:31.680 --> 0:01:34.560 or experience has shaped you the most? What would be 0:01:34.600 --> 0:01:37.200 your last meal? And can you tell me something in 0:01:37.240 --> 0:01:40.840 your life that's grown out of a personal disaster? And 0:01:40.920 --> 0:01:45.400 I've gathered a group of really remarkable people, ones that 0:01:45.480 --> 0:01:47.960 I am honored and humbled to have had the chance 0:01:48.000 --> 0:01:50.600 to engage with. You may not hear their answers to 0:01:50.680 --> 0:01:54.000 all seven of these questions. We've whittled it down to 0:01:54.200 --> 0:01:58.400 which questions felt closest to their experience, or the most surprising, 0:01:58.800 --> 0:02:04.240 or created the most fertile ground to connect. My guest 0:02:04.240 --> 0:02:09.160 today is the musician, composer, writer, and comedian Tim Minchin. 0:02:10.440 --> 0:02:12.200 Tim's live shows. 0:02:11.760 --> 0:02:15.600 Are unlike anyone else's, and I urge you to go 0:02:15.639 --> 0:02:18.040 and see him if he's playing anywhere near you at 0:02:18.080 --> 0:02:23.240 any time. He has this magical spectrum that he plays 0:02:23.240 --> 0:02:27.160 within where one minute the mundane is being examined and 0:02:27.240 --> 0:02:31.239 poeticized in a hilarious way, and in the next moment, 0:02:31.600 --> 0:02:35.799 an existential philosophical viewpoint enters the scene or song, and 0:02:36.160 --> 0:02:41.840 now all things are transformed, including you, the audience. Tim 0:02:41.880 --> 0:02:44.680 wrote the music and lyrics to the multi award winning 0:02:44.760 --> 0:02:49.679 musical Matilda. He has released five DVDs and seven live albums, 0:02:50.040 --> 0:02:53.239 and this summer in June, his show Songs The World 0:02:53.280 --> 0:02:55.720 Will Never Hear is touring in the UK. 0:02:56.520 --> 0:02:58.480 Like I said, go and see. 0:02:58.360 --> 0:03:01.120 Him perform if he possibly can, because he is a 0:03:01.200 --> 0:03:08.720 proper magic Can you tell me wherein when you were happiest? 0:03:09.320 --> 0:03:13.600 You have to tell me yours, I will tell you mine. 0:03:13.760 --> 0:03:15.040 Do you have one? 0:03:15.320 --> 0:03:15.760 Yeah? 0:03:15.919 --> 0:03:18.440 I think it can either be like it's either a moment, 0:03:18.440 --> 0:03:21.760 because obviously there are I would hope lots and lots 0:03:21.800 --> 0:03:24.120 and lots of different happy moments. I think it's really 0:03:24.160 --> 0:03:29.840 about isolating one that reflects something about you. So for 0:03:29.960 --> 0:03:34.280 me it is there is this clear day when my 0:03:34.360 --> 0:03:37.080 mum was still alive and she was on the beach 0:03:37.120 --> 0:03:40.400 with my son and they were like having a picnic, 0:03:40.720 --> 0:03:42.320 and I think my sister was there with a couple 0:03:42.320 --> 0:03:45.440 of her kids, and the waves suddenly picked up, and 0:03:45.480 --> 0:03:46.520 I was like, I'm just going to go for a 0:03:46.560 --> 0:03:49.280 quick surf, and I paddled out and I was just out, 0:03:49.920 --> 0:03:52.680 and I could see that there was a set coming in, 0:03:53.200 --> 0:03:55.760 and I just turned around, knowing the set was coming, 0:03:55.760 --> 0:03:59.560 and I just saw them on the beach and the 0:03:59.600 --> 0:04:03.040 feeling seeing them all there and then turning back and 0:04:03.080 --> 0:04:05.880 there was this perfect set of waves and there was 0:04:05.880 --> 0:04:07.680 probably only a couple of other people in the water 0:04:08.280 --> 0:04:11.240 paddling for that wave, catching it and then riding it 0:04:11.400 --> 0:04:14.840 and watching my son holding my mum's hand, like jumping 0:04:14.880 --> 0:04:18.040 up and down on the beach. It was such undiluted 0:04:18.400 --> 0:04:19.800 joy of connection. 0:04:20.240 --> 0:04:23.400 And that's a convergence of so many things that you love. 0:04:24.160 --> 0:04:28.640 So you managed to get your mom now be artified 0:04:28.680 --> 0:04:32.160 by demise and your son, who you love because he's 0:04:32.200 --> 0:04:35.160 your son, and your hot favorite thing, which is being 0:04:35.200 --> 0:04:39.120 in the ocean, and then the ocean serving up adrenaline 0:04:39.120 --> 0:04:41.800 and dolphins in the form of a good step, and 0:04:41.839 --> 0:04:44.960 then you catching them set, so you communing with the 0:04:44.960 --> 0:04:49.080 ocean and being witnessed, and there's so much there that 0:04:49.880 --> 0:04:52.000 you're right, that's a moment that speaks. 0:04:51.680 --> 0:04:53.000 To who you are exactly. 0:04:53.600 --> 0:04:56.400 I fear that I don't know if I can make 0:04:56.480 --> 0:05:01.839 them converge, because I am very when I'm down on 0:05:02.040 --> 0:05:04.800 my block where we have some trees, and I've just 0:05:04.839 --> 0:05:09.200 done like eight hours hacking away at some drop that 0:05:09.240 --> 0:05:12.119 some people would find absolutely horrible, like trying to clear 0:05:12.279 --> 0:05:16.280 an area of weeds of invasive species, and I'm just 0:05:16.640 --> 0:05:19.599 hot and sweat. But there was a task which eight 0:05:19.600 --> 0:05:26.000 hours ago looked actually futile. But just by putting my 0:05:26.080 --> 0:05:30.200 head down and not stopping, I made something difficult. I 0:05:30.320 --> 0:05:32.440 put it behind me, and then I'm hot and I'm tired, 0:05:32.520 --> 0:05:34.600 and I walk into that little shitty house we have 0:05:34.720 --> 0:05:37.080 down there and get a beer and feel like I've 0:05:37.120 --> 0:05:39.680 earnt that beer, rather than I'm having that beer because 0:05:40.000 --> 0:05:43.640 I find the ends of days anxiety making. But rather 0:05:43.720 --> 0:05:46.159 this is a beer I've learnt by doing labor. And 0:05:46.480 --> 0:05:49.840 you know that is a version of it, as is 0:05:50.600 --> 0:05:53.960 the me that runs my ten k in a time 0:05:54.040 --> 0:05:57.599 I'm proud of, as is me watching my son play guitar. 0:05:58.360 --> 0:06:01.920 And then there's the version of happiness that you get 0:06:02.000 --> 0:06:04.440 when you've got ten thousand people standing up at the 0:06:04.520 --> 0:06:07.200 end of a concert that is unmatched, or just me 0:06:07.320 --> 0:06:10.000 on stage buying piano. That's a type of happiness, you 0:06:10.040 --> 0:06:12.520 know what I mean. There's a sort of selfishness womania 0:06:12.640 --> 0:06:16.440 call happiness, and then it's opposite. There's eight hours of 0:06:16.480 --> 0:06:19.479 weeding where I've managed to convince my kids to help me, 0:06:20.200 --> 0:06:22.839 and then there's being on stage in front of a 0:06:22.839 --> 0:06:24.880 lot of people, and they're very, very different. 0:06:25.320 --> 0:06:27.760 I think what I like about that question because a 0:06:27.760 --> 0:06:29.760 lot of people have rolled their eyes at it, But 0:06:29.960 --> 0:06:34.080 what I think it does is ask us to distill 0:06:35.080 --> 0:06:39.400 what it is in ourselves that we connect with around contentment. 0:06:39.960 --> 0:06:42.800 So it doesn't surprise me at all that running a 0:06:42.880 --> 0:06:47.600 ten k in a time that you deem appropriate, clearing weeds, 0:06:47.720 --> 0:06:50.200 or standing on a stage, that all of those things 0:06:50.680 --> 0:06:52.960 are a distillation of a part of you, and that 0:06:53.000 --> 0:06:55.359 they become part of your self knowledge. 0:06:55.560 --> 0:06:57.120 And I like how revealing that is. 0:06:57.160 --> 0:06:59.680 Because we don't ask ourselves, I think enough, or share 0:06:59.720 --> 0:07:02.480 with ease each other what helps us distill those things? 0:07:02.480 --> 0:07:05.240 Like happiness is such a kind of ephemeral idea for 0:07:05.279 --> 0:07:07.160 most people, and they're like, oh, I'm so busy thinking 0:07:07.160 --> 0:07:09.000 about not being able to pay my mortgage or my 0:07:09.000 --> 0:07:12.200 shit job or my boring relationship or whatever it is 0:07:12.760 --> 0:07:15.080 that we don't go. These small things or these big 0:07:15.080 --> 0:07:16.760 things are the things that make me feel better. 0:07:17.240 --> 0:07:20.240 An amazing one yesterday morning, because it was a Sunday 0:07:20.360 --> 0:07:22.920 morning and we've just moved back into our house that 0:07:23.000 --> 0:07:26.440 has been being renovated for two years, and my daughter, 0:07:26.600 --> 0:07:29.520 who has not found a high school easy, just in 0:07:29.640 --> 0:07:32.280 her final year. Twelve weeks o and we're back in 0:07:32.320 --> 0:07:36.440 the house and my boy was going to do an 0:07:36.480 --> 0:07:39.640 audition for a musical. And he's not an extrovert, he's 0:07:39.640 --> 0:07:42.560 not a show kid, but he really wants to do it, 0:07:43.280 --> 0:07:46.080 and so I spent now with him warming up his 0:07:46.240 --> 0:07:48.520 voice because he had cold, and I was teaching him 0:07:48.520 --> 0:07:50.200 how to warm up, and for the first time ever, 0:07:50.240 --> 0:07:52.400 he understood the benefit of warming up. And I sent 0:07:52.440 --> 0:07:55.280 him off to his audition, and my daughter woke up 0:07:55.360 --> 0:07:57.800 having had a bit of a night out, which you know, 0:07:57.840 --> 0:08:01.240 it's quite new and exciting to have it. I'm in 0:08:01.320 --> 0:08:03.280 this house that we spent all out of time and 0:08:03.320 --> 0:08:06.360 money on and making coffee and my coffee machine. I mean, 0:08:06.360 --> 0:08:09.520 there are those moments where but they're rare ones because 0:08:09.560 --> 0:08:11.920 they're ones where you've gone. If I renovate my house, 0:08:11.960 --> 0:08:14.600 and if I get my daughter through high school, and 0:08:14.640 --> 0:08:18.040 if my son likes music like I do, those are 0:08:18.040 --> 0:08:19.560 the sort of things that will make me happy, and 0:08:19.600 --> 0:08:22.800 if I have a good coffee machine, And often they 0:08:22.840 --> 0:08:26.120 are false. And then every now and then you get 0:08:26.200 --> 0:08:28.440 day where you're like, ah that I thought this shit 0:08:28.480 --> 0:08:33.360 would make me happy, and usually usually so I thought 0:08:33.360 --> 0:08:35.400 it would make me happy and then didn't. And the 0:08:35.520 --> 0:08:38.120 happiness comes at you from the side in a moment 0:08:38.240 --> 0:08:41.640 you weren't expecting. And that's a hard lesson to learn. 0:08:42.240 --> 0:08:43.839 I mean, I say it in my little book I've 0:08:43.920 --> 0:08:47.120 just put out, don't see happiness. Happiness is like an orgasm. 0:08:47.200 --> 0:08:49.079 If you think about it too much, it goes away. 0:08:49.360 --> 0:08:51.520 I think happiness is the side effect, and you should 0:08:51.559 --> 0:08:53.760 be very careful about pursuing it. And you'll notice that 0:08:53.960 --> 0:08:56.400 all those things when you send them back to me. 0:08:56.760 --> 0:08:59.400 I was a bit mortified to realize they're all goal 0:08:59.520 --> 0:09:02.640 or into which there's something about my brain. I need 0:09:02.679 --> 0:09:04.000 a task now. 0:09:04.240 --> 0:09:08.080 But that's interesting, Like what's that mortification? Because it's you, 0:09:08.840 --> 0:09:10.720 but it's but that's also that's who you are, and 0:09:10.800 --> 0:09:13.239 in a way, it's like it's how you achieve the extraordinary, 0:09:13.400 --> 0:09:18.280 very very very idiosyncratic things that you tim achieve, and 0:09:19.040 --> 0:09:21.480 you being goal oriented, I wish that you would rethink 0:09:21.520 --> 0:09:22.280 your mortification. 0:09:22.480 --> 0:09:25.280 Well it's not a horrific mortification, but it's like, oh, yeah, 0:09:25.600 --> 0:09:28.200 that clocks that's me. Yeah, I like to have a 0:09:28.240 --> 0:09:30.080 goal and do it and then have a beer at 0:09:30.080 --> 0:09:33.000 the end with my family. That I'm a pretty simple orrobot. 0:09:33.120 --> 0:09:35.280 Really I need a thing to feel like I've achieved, 0:09:35.679 --> 0:09:38.520 and then that's just a relaxation of me. 0:09:43.760 --> 0:09:47.079 So what quality do you like least about yourself? 0:09:47.760 --> 0:09:52.920 Probably related to that need to achieve, which I don't 0:09:52.920 --> 0:09:55.040 know if I like it. The thing I think is 0:09:55.320 --> 0:09:59.200 a bit of a trial. Is it slightly re inless 0:09:59.240 --> 0:10:03.280 sense that I need to do something more to prove 0:10:03.320 --> 0:10:06.439 myself to myself or something. It's a bit tiring when 0:10:06.440 --> 0:10:12.240 it works, tiresome to be needing to prove myself to myself. 0:10:12.400 --> 0:10:14.840 Who is the you that is proving and who is 0:10:14.880 --> 0:10:17.360 the you that needs to be proved too. 0:10:17.920 --> 0:10:21.600 I've talked about this idea that I think maybe just 0:10:21.760 --> 0:10:24.880 second child stuff or whatever, or going to a boys' 0:10:24.880 --> 0:10:27.680 school where you kind of made you feel like if 0:10:27.720 --> 0:10:30.640 you're not whatever footy player. There's a bit of that stuff. 0:10:30.640 --> 0:10:33.120 But also because I've got a lot of closed doors 0:10:33.280 --> 0:10:37.320 in my career as a musician and an actor and artist. 0:10:37.520 --> 0:10:39.760 There are a lot of closed doors for about ten years, 0:10:39.760 --> 0:10:41.880 which in hindsight, of course, were the best thing that 0:10:41.880 --> 0:10:44.319 could have possibly happened, because it made me work out 0:10:44.440 --> 0:10:47.240 and got me where I got. But I think those 0:10:47.280 --> 0:10:50.559 closed doors gave me a little mechanism in my brain 0:10:50.720 --> 0:10:53.439 that has a bit of a I'll show them, and 0:10:53.480 --> 0:10:56.320 the me I'm proving myself too could also be described 0:10:56.360 --> 0:11:00.920 as this esoteric them. But there is no there. There 0:11:01.000 --> 0:11:05.000 is an I'll show them training in my brain, and 0:11:05.040 --> 0:11:07.280 I think artists get that all the time, a bit yeah, 0:11:07.320 --> 0:11:09.319 well you oh idea all the time. 0:11:09.480 --> 0:11:14.600 And I've only recently started asking myself who who the 0:11:14.640 --> 0:11:18.120 fuck is the them? Who is the them? And why 0:11:18.160 --> 0:11:19.320 do I think they care? 0:11:20.120 --> 0:11:22.440 They don't care. In fact, the people who said no 0:11:22.640 --> 0:11:26.120 to me, I'm very happy for me. I know people 0:11:26.120 --> 0:11:28.079 who said no to me, You're like, oh, you did 0:11:28.160 --> 0:11:30.960 so well, so great, Like there's no one to prove 0:11:31.040 --> 0:11:33.920 itself to. And that's connected to the other thing that 0:11:34.000 --> 0:11:36.880 I think is unattractive in me, which is I can 0:11:37.200 --> 0:11:39.599 get a bit sort of how dare they know? A 0:11:39.679 --> 0:11:44.200 bit righteous when I'm unfairly criticized or i feel like 0:11:44.240 --> 0:11:47.760 I've been mistreated, or specifically, if i feel like I've 0:11:47.800 --> 0:11:50.360 been treated in a manner that I would not treat others. 0:11:51.160 --> 0:11:56.000 I'm not claiming any sort of ethical even goodness, let 0:11:56.040 --> 0:11:58.520 alone perfection, but I have a very this is the 0:11:58.600 --> 0:12:00.559 right way to treat people, and this is how one 0:12:00.559 --> 0:12:02.640 should behave And when I'm treated in a way that 0:12:02.720 --> 0:12:05.760 I don't think I'll trick someone else. I have a 0:12:05.800 --> 0:12:10.280 tendency to be a bit right and it's not really attractive. 0:12:10.400 --> 0:12:12.360 You need to be able to take listenings and arrows 0:12:12.440 --> 0:12:16.640 with humility, and I worked on that as well. But yeah, 0:12:16.720 --> 0:12:20.520 I can get a bit defensive and a bit like 0:12:21.320 --> 0:12:23.280 not being treated well and I'm going to write a 0:12:23.320 --> 0:12:26.720 strongly worded letter. And I was like, oh, shut, you're 0:12:26.760 --> 0:12:27.120 all right. 0:12:27.200 --> 0:12:31.040 By the way, my boyfriend is constantly telling me that 0:12:31.160 --> 0:12:33.840 I need to write a book for the lou called 0:12:34.280 --> 0:12:40.840 a strongly worded letter because hot but him, I'm not joking. 0:12:41.040 --> 0:12:44.080 I think that we should because it is it is 0:12:44.120 --> 0:12:46.040 the funniest thing. Like he's walked into the kitchen on 0:12:46.080 --> 0:12:48.400 more than one occasion, and he's like, what are you doing. 0:12:48.400 --> 0:12:50.120 I was like, I'm writing to the New York Times 0:12:50.160 --> 0:12:52.360 about the first so I would not include the word 0:12:52.520 --> 0:12:57.079 dyke d y k e in Word today or some 0:12:57.440 --> 0:13:00.920 show that they've changed the design A write righteousness is 0:13:01.000 --> 0:13:03.000 Oh my god, it's hilarious. 0:13:03.080 --> 0:13:05.559 I've got a fire called unsent Angry Letters. 0:13:05.760 --> 0:13:07.959 I think we should make a compilation and we should 0:13:07.960 --> 0:13:09.920 just solicit letters from people that we. 0:13:09.960 --> 0:13:13.120 Know, Yeah, and take all the identifying factors out of it. 0:13:13.280 --> 0:13:13.960 Yeah, exactly. 0:13:14.240 --> 0:13:16.480 I read one the other day I wrote years ago 0:13:17.000 --> 0:13:19.360 where I pulled out of a corporate geek and I 0:13:19.480 --> 0:13:24.640 pulled out hugely apologetically, with plenty of time. I got 0:13:24.679 --> 0:13:27.240 a really good role in something. It was like a 0:13:27.360 --> 0:13:30.800 major thing, and I pulled out and they tried to 0:13:31.320 --> 0:13:36.439 sue me for the money and all that letter was hilarious. 0:13:36.600 --> 0:13:42.000 It was like so shaming and so self rutchous. I 0:13:42.040 --> 0:13:43.520 write them for myself. 0:13:43.600 --> 0:13:46.960 I do send my word spelling Being connections letters to 0:13:47.000 --> 0:13:48.960 the New York Times and they never write back. 0:13:49.240 --> 0:13:51.559 I was doing spelling be today and they wouldn't let 0:13:51.559 --> 0:13:56.080 me have na fair enough Pali pali as in pay 0:13:56.760 --> 0:13:58.280 like he's a bit pally with me. 0:13:59.720 --> 0:14:02.000 I think there's all sorts of words that at Anglo 0:14:02.360 --> 0:14:05.559 Australian was that they just won't have any chance. That's 0:14:20.720 --> 0:14:25.040 what person, place, or experience most altered your life. 0:14:25.640 --> 0:14:30.600 Well, see, I'm I'm a determinist fetishist, as in I 0:14:30.600 --> 0:14:32.480 I am. 0:14:32.120 --> 0:14:33.200 I'm writing that down. 0:14:33.320 --> 0:14:36.520 Hold on, I love that determinist fe. 0:14:37.720 --> 0:14:40.240 As in I am. I was on stage, they're not 0:14:40.400 --> 0:14:43.120 doing an interview, and I sort of made the point 0:14:43.640 --> 0:14:46.440 that the fact that you came to the show to 0:14:46.600 --> 0:14:49.080 know if you're in a relationship with someone and you 0:14:49.160 --> 0:14:51.000 intend to have children, the fact that you came to 0:14:51.040 --> 0:14:53.560 see me speech to night and that I am saying 0:14:53.560 --> 0:14:58.120 a sentence will change the child you have, because everything does, 0:14:58.160 --> 0:15:00.760 because the chance of you having any one child is 0:15:00.800 --> 0:15:03.400 a swimm into one. And so just the fact that 0:15:03.480 --> 0:15:05.760 I'm talking a bit long now means you're with this 0:15:05.880 --> 0:15:08.760 theater two seconds later than you would and everything from 0:15:08.840 --> 0:15:11.200 that moment forward will be slightly different than it would 0:15:11.200 --> 0:15:15.280 have been. Everything everything that you touch from that moment 0:15:15.320 --> 0:15:18.280 forward will be slightly different, and therefore your child will 0:15:18.280 --> 0:15:20.680 be a different child. Because I said the sentence track 0:15:20.840 --> 0:15:24.800 and so I fare to show that butterfly wing, flat stuff. 0:15:24.840 --> 0:15:27.840 So it's hard. I like to think about the tiny, 0:15:28.000 --> 0:15:31.720 tiny things that changed everything. I can't name, and I don't. 0:15:31.840 --> 0:15:35.120 That you could change. 0:15:35.240 --> 0:15:39.600 It's all of them, right, it's every every choice changes. 0:15:39.920 --> 0:15:43.960 Right then, can you tell me when that in your life? 0:15:44.200 --> 0:15:48.280 Do you remember when feeling that you were a determinist 0:15:48.320 --> 0:15:49.720 fetishist began? 0:15:49.880 --> 0:15:49.960 Like? 0:15:50.040 --> 0:15:50.960 Were you very young? 0:15:51.400 --> 0:15:55.200 Was that something that you were conscious of suddenly going, 0:15:55.400 --> 0:15:59.479 Oh my god, I believe in every single thing affects 0:15:59.560 --> 0:16:00.440 every thing. 0:16:00.560 --> 0:16:02.520 I was trying to figure that out. I've been playing 0:16:02.560 --> 0:16:06.120 a song in my latest tour called Understand that has 0:16:06.160 --> 0:16:09.440 a middle eight in the song just as this loop 0:16:09.520 --> 0:16:12.160 that goes you believe in fate? I guess I believe 0:16:12.240 --> 0:16:16.160 in consequence and flapping butterflies and photographs and it's all 0:16:16.320 --> 0:16:18.840 just about this. And I'm like, oh that I wrote 0:16:18.840 --> 0:16:21.640 that in two thousand and two. I was in my twenties. 0:16:21.840 --> 0:16:24.960 Oh right, this stuff is earlier than I thought I 0:16:24.960 --> 0:16:27.400 would have pegged it as in my thirties. I think 0:16:27.400 --> 0:16:29.840 I was really issued into journalism before I really got 0:16:29.840 --> 0:16:32.000 my head around free will and the problem with free 0:16:32.000 --> 0:16:36.160 will anyway, What was the question, what personal? It was? 0:16:36.360 --> 0:16:38.840 What personal place or experience most altered your life. But 0:16:39.000 --> 0:16:42.000 that's such an interesting answer because the answer. 0:16:42.240 --> 0:16:44.800 Is all moments always, all. 0:16:44.640 --> 0:16:48.480 Moments affected, all moments affected, all moments affected moments. 0:16:48.600 --> 0:16:51.800 I think that's right. The particular jiz that my dad 0:16:51.800 --> 0:16:54.640 did on a train to Edinburgh in nineteen seventy five 0:16:54.960 --> 0:16:57.920 is the main event that after everything. 0:16:58.040 --> 0:17:00.200 That way is that where you work and see. 0:17:00.160 --> 0:17:02.680 I believe I was considered back with my mom's just 0:17:02.800 --> 0:17:05.600 diver well a year ago now and so I'm sorry 0:17:06.080 --> 0:17:08.520 I used to not say particular things. Now I've been 0:17:08.560 --> 0:17:11.400 saying whatever I want. No, the story goes my dad 0:17:11.440 --> 0:17:13.600 and mum were on a sleeper trained to Edinburgh. 0:17:13.640 --> 0:17:15.200 Oh that's very romantic. 0:17:16.720 --> 0:17:17.160 That's why. 0:17:18.920 --> 0:17:20.400 Maybe that is why you rock and roll. 0:17:20.480 --> 0:17:23.600 But I also I like how you what did you 0:17:23.640 --> 0:17:25.000 just call it awayward jizz? 0:17:28.400 --> 0:17:31.480 Yeah, there's lots of little moments that changed my career. 0:17:31.560 --> 0:17:34.879 And I suppose because I've had this one relationship in 0:17:34.920 --> 0:17:38.000 my life, Sarah, who I met when I was seventeen. 0:17:38.160 --> 0:17:40.480 That's sort of turning up on the first day of 0:17:40.680 --> 0:17:43.800 UNI and seeing this girl I've met before and finding 0:17:43.800 --> 0:17:45.840 out we had all the same lectures. I mean that 0:17:46.119 --> 0:17:50.240 it's it's hard to put any quantity on her influence 0:17:50.280 --> 0:17:53.240 on my work. I guess I would have been a musician. 0:17:53.280 --> 0:17:55.320 I would have been an artist whatever I think it's 0:17:56.000 --> 0:17:58.760 built to do. But my first girlfriend happened to be 0:17:59.080 --> 0:18:03.119 someone who suited me. But it is very unusual in 0:18:03.160 --> 0:18:06.040 this day and age and in our industry to have 0:18:06.280 --> 0:18:09.080 one relationship and to have to fall in love with 0:18:09.119 --> 0:18:12.320 someone who's so different in it, so compatible, and who 0:18:12.320 --> 0:18:17.840 has been so unbelievably supportive of every eight hours of 0:18:17.880 --> 0:18:20.680 weeding I've ever wanted to do. She's like, all right, 0:18:20.760 --> 0:18:22.840 if you want to do weeding, or you want to 0:18:22.880 --> 0:18:25.240 write an orchestra tour, or you know, you want to 0:18:25.280 --> 0:18:28.240 have kids and move to England when I'm six months 0:18:28.280 --> 0:18:30.560 pregnant with that first child, Okay, we're moving to England. 0:18:30.600 --> 0:18:33.440 She's not a pushover, she's just up for it. And 0:18:33.520 --> 0:18:37.679 that's obviously massively influential in allowing me to do what 0:18:37.720 --> 0:18:39.680 I've ended up doing. Yeah, it's a. 0:18:39.600 --> 0:18:44.320 Little true lovely Sarah. Give her a big hug from me, please. 0:18:44.080 --> 0:18:49.440 I'll do that. She's Quoked's hell at the moment, is she? Yeah, 0:18:49.800 --> 0:18:52.600 look after yourself. I'm doing a podcast. 0:18:57.480 --> 0:19:00.359 In your life, and I know that this going to 0:19:00.400 --> 0:19:03.040 dovetail into something else that I just said, But I'm 0:19:03.080 --> 0:19:06.119 asking you in your life, can you tell me about 0:19:06.160 --> 0:19:09.360 something that has grown out of a personal disaster. 0:19:09.960 --> 0:19:13.480 Oh? Yeah. That's one of the great bits of learning 0:19:13.760 --> 0:19:17.240 that you can only get from time, is that everything 0:19:17.280 --> 0:19:21.560 that seems bad at the time because everything that happens 0:19:21.600 --> 0:19:26.119 after any given event is dependent on that event to happen. 0:19:27.240 --> 0:19:30.320 Because there is no faith and no God with my worldview, 0:19:30.640 --> 0:19:33.040 with all due respect to people who believe in fate 0:19:33.119 --> 0:19:38.959 and God, because it's just a deterministic thing. Every disaster 0:19:40.320 --> 0:19:44.320 is the shit in which all your future flowers grow. 0:19:45.560 --> 0:19:50.000 And getting your head around that is really great bit 0:19:50.040 --> 0:19:52.600 of wisdom, and it's very hard to apply in the moment. 0:19:52.640 --> 0:19:55.639 When the next bad thing happens, you think, well, hold on, 0:19:55.680 --> 0:19:59.639 I've learned that when bad things happen, they are the 0:19:59.680 --> 0:20:02.080 shit in which future flowers grow. It that's just how 0:20:02.200 --> 0:20:04.879 causality works. But in the moment you still ray on 0:20:04.960 --> 0:20:06.840 against it. Of course you do. It's a negative thing. 0:20:06.880 --> 0:20:09.520 It's a tortered expectation. It's a thing about which you're 0:20:09.520 --> 0:20:11.600 going to write and anyway later. But I think it 0:20:11.600 --> 0:20:15.080 would be true wisdom to be able to, in the 0:20:15.160 --> 0:20:19.280 moment of disaster, access your knowledge that out of this 0:20:19.440 --> 0:20:21.320 desans will grow something beautiful. 0:20:21.600 --> 0:20:24.280 I've banged on about that since I was in my 0:20:24.600 --> 0:20:27.560 late teens early twenties, of how it is possible that 0:20:27.600 --> 0:20:31.480 this duality exists, that one can categorically know what you're 0:20:31.520 --> 0:20:34.160 saying is true, which is, I know that something good, 0:20:34.280 --> 0:20:37.399 invariably something else, not just good, something else is going 0:20:37.440 --> 0:20:38.040 to grow out of this. 0:20:38.280 --> 0:20:41.640 Unless nothing good is ever going to happen again, everything 0:20:41.760 --> 0:20:43.640 future good will rely on this moment. 0:20:43.720 --> 0:20:47.160 How can we become experientially so shit? How can one 0:20:47.200 --> 0:20:49.280 hold both those things to be true? Is that just 0:20:49.600 --> 0:20:53.679 fundamentally being a human being that you're experiencing a terrible time? 0:20:53.880 --> 0:20:58.760 How can one fully piggyback onto the notion that this 0:20:58.880 --> 0:21:02.720 is going to create something else, interesting, good, whatever adjectivity 0:21:02.720 --> 0:21:04.760 you want to use, something else will grow out of this. 0:21:04.720 --> 0:21:07.440 Shit Because you'd be a psycho, you'd be a psycho 0:21:07.600 --> 0:21:10.480 robot to be able to just skip a step, because 0:21:10.480 --> 0:21:13.399 the whole reason the good stuff comes is because you 0:21:13.440 --> 0:21:17.160 don't skip a step because you rail against what you've lost, 0:21:17.359 --> 0:21:19.960 or you rail against your thoughts of expectation, or you 0:21:20.080 --> 0:21:23.080 grieve for your mum, or you grieve for your relationship, 0:21:23.200 --> 0:21:26.520 or you grieve for the four years you spent working 0:21:26.560 --> 0:21:30.040 on an animated film in LA and then get shut 0:21:30.040 --> 0:21:32.560