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Speaker 1: I'm bad for the same reason because if someone asked

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Speaker 1: me a question, I just answer it to the best

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Speaker 1: of my ability one hundred. But if it's really a

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Speaker 1: silly question, I'll go I'm not much good with those

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Speaker 1: sorts of questions. What I need to be better is

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Speaker 1: someone asked a good question and I think, oh, that's

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Speaker 1: a good question. I'm going to unpack it, and now

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Speaker 1: I don't. That's what gets me in trouble, because although

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Speaker 1: you could look at it like this, and you could

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Speaker 1: look at it like that, and then the press will go,

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Speaker 1: he said that thing, and I'm like, no, I was.

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Speaker 1: I was doing the thing I'm trying to do, which

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Speaker 1: is to be self aware about my biases. A bit

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Speaker 1: doesn't work out.

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Speaker 2: Hello, I'm mini driver. I've always loved Proust's questionnaire.

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Speaker 3: It was originally in nineteenth century parlor game where players

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Speaker 3: would ask each other thirty five questions aimed at revealing

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Speaker 3: the other player's true nature. In asking different people the

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Speaker 3: same set of questions, you can make observations about which

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Speaker 3: truths appear to be universal.

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Speaker 2: And it made me.

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Speaker 3: Wonder, what if these questions were just the jumping off point,

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Speaker 3: what greater depths would be revealed if I asked these

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Speaker 3: questions as conversation starters. So I adapted Pru's questionnaire and

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Speaker 3: I wrote my own seven questions that I personally think

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Speaker 3: are pertinent to a person's story. They are when and

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Speaker 3: where were you happiest? What is the quality you like

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Speaker 3: least about yourself? What relationship, real or fictionalized, defines love

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Speaker 3: for you? What question would you most like answered, What person, place,

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Speaker 3: or experience has shaped you the most? What would be

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Speaker 3: your last meal? And can you tell me something in

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Speaker 3: your life that's grown out of a personal disaster? And

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Speaker 3: I've gathered a group of really remarkable people, ones that

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Speaker 3: I am honored and humbled to have had the chance

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Speaker 3: to engage with. You may not hear their answers to

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Speaker 3: all seven of these questions. We've whittled it down to

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Speaker 3: which questions felt closest to their experience, or the most surprising,

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Speaker 3: or created the most fertile ground to connect. My guest

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Speaker 3: today is the musician, composer, writer, and comedian Tim Minchin.

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Speaker 2: Tim's live shows.

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Speaker 3: Are unlike anyone else's, and I urge you to go

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Speaker 3: and see him if he's playing anywhere near you at

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Speaker 3: any time. He has this magical spectrum that he plays

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Speaker 3: within where one minute the mundane is being examined and

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Speaker 3: poeticized in a hilarious way, and in the next moment,

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Speaker 3: an existential philosophical viewpoint enters the scene or song, and

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Speaker 3: now all things are transformed, including you, the audience. Tim

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Speaker 3: wrote the music and lyrics to the multi award winning

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Speaker 3: musical Matilda. He has released five DVDs and seven live albums,

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Speaker 3: and this summer in June, his show Songs The World

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Speaker 3: Will Never Hear is touring in the UK.

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Speaker 2: Like I said, go and see.

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Speaker 3: Him perform if he possibly can, because he is a

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Speaker 3: proper magic Can you tell me wherein when you were happiest?

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Speaker 1: You have to tell me yours, I will tell you mine.

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Speaker 1: Do you have one?

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Speaker 2: Yeah?

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Speaker 3: I think it can either be like it's either a moment,

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Speaker 3: because obviously there are I would hope lots and lots

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Speaker 3: and lots of different happy moments. I think it's really

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Speaker 3: about isolating one that reflects something about you. So for

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Speaker 3: me it is there is this clear day when my

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Speaker 3: mum was still alive and she was on the beach

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Speaker 3: with my son and they were like having a picnic,

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Speaker 3: and I think my sister was there with a couple

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Speaker 3: of her kids, and the waves suddenly picked up, and

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Speaker 3: I was like, I'm just going to go for a

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Speaker 3: quick surf, and I paddled out and I was just out,

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Speaker 3: and I could see that there was a set coming in,

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Speaker 3: and I just turned around, knowing the set was coming,

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Speaker 3: and I just saw them on the beach and the

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Speaker 3: feeling seeing them all there and then turning back and

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Speaker 3: there was this perfect set of waves and there was

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Speaker 3: probably only a couple of other people in the water

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Speaker 3: paddling for that wave, catching it and then riding it

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Speaker 3: and watching my son holding my mum's hand, like jumping

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Speaker 3: up and down on the beach. It was such undiluted

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Speaker 3: joy of connection.

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Speaker 1: And that's a convergence of so many things that you love.

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Speaker 1: So you managed to get your mom now be artified

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Speaker 1: by demise and your son, who you love because he's

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Speaker 1: your son, and your hot favorite thing, which is being

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Speaker 1: in the ocean, and then the ocean serving up adrenaline

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Speaker 1: and dolphins in the form of a good step, and

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Speaker 1: then you catching them set, so you communing with the

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Speaker 1: ocean and being witnessed, and there's so much there that

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Speaker 1: you're right, that's a moment that speaks.

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Speaker 2: To who you are exactly.

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Speaker 1: I fear that I don't know if I can make

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Speaker 1: them converge, because I am very when I'm down on

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Speaker 1: my block where we have some trees, and I've just

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Speaker 1: done like eight hours hacking away at some drop that

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Speaker 1: some people would find absolutely horrible, like trying to clear

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Speaker 1: an area of weeds of invasive species, and I'm just

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Speaker 1: hot and sweat. But there was a task which eight

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Speaker 1: hours ago looked actually futile. But just by putting my

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Speaker 1: head down and not stopping, I made something difficult. I

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Speaker 1: put it behind me, and then I'm hot and I'm tired,

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Speaker 1: and I walk into that little shitty house we have

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Speaker 1: down there and get a beer and feel like I've

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Speaker 1: earnt that beer, rather than I'm having that beer because

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Speaker 1: I find the ends of days anxiety making. But rather

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Speaker 1: this is a beer I've learnt by doing labor. And

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Speaker 1: you know that is a version of it, as is

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Speaker 1: the me that runs my ten k in a time

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Speaker 1: I'm proud of, as is me watching my son play guitar.

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Speaker 1: And then there's the version of happiness that you get

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Speaker 1: when you've got ten thousand people standing up at the

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Speaker 1: end of a concert that is unmatched, or just me

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Speaker 1: on stage buying piano. That's a type of happiness, you

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Speaker 1: know what I mean. There's a sort of selfishness womania

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Speaker 1: call happiness, and then it's opposite. There's eight hours of

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Speaker 1: weeding where I've managed to convince my kids to help me,

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Speaker 1: and then there's being on stage in front of a

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Speaker 1: lot of people, and they're very, very different.

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Speaker 3: I think what I like about that question because a

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Speaker 3: lot of people have rolled their eyes at it, But

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Speaker 3: what I think it does is ask us to distill

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Speaker 3: what it is in ourselves that we connect with around contentment.

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Speaker 3: So it doesn't surprise me at all that running a

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Speaker 3: ten k in a time that you deem appropriate, clearing weeds,

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Speaker 3: or standing on a stage, that all of those things

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Speaker 3: are a distillation of a part of you, and that

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Speaker 3: they become part of your self knowledge.

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Speaker 2: And I like how revealing that is.

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Speaker 3: Because we don't ask ourselves, I think enough, or share

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Speaker 3: with ease each other what helps us distill those things?

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Speaker 3: Like happiness is such a kind of ephemeral idea for

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Speaker 3: most people, and they're like, oh, I'm so busy thinking

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Speaker 3: about not being able to pay my mortgage or my

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Speaker 3: shit job or my boring relationship or whatever it is

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Speaker 3: that we don't go. These small things or these big

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Speaker 3: things are the things that make me feel better.

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Speaker 1: An amazing one yesterday morning, because it was a Sunday

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Speaker 1: morning and we've just moved back into our house that

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Speaker 1: has been being renovated for two years, and my daughter,

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Speaker 1: who has not found a high school easy, just in

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Speaker 1: her final year. Twelve weeks o and we're back in

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Speaker 1: the house and my boy was going to do an

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Speaker 1: audition for a musical. And he's not an extrovert, he's

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Speaker 1: not a show kid, but he really wants to do it,

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Speaker 1: and so I spent now with him warming up his

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Speaker 1: voice because he had cold, and I was teaching him

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Speaker 1: how to warm up, and for the first time ever,

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Speaker 1: he understood the benefit of warming up. And I sent

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Speaker 1: him off to his audition, and my daughter woke up

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Speaker 1: having had a bit of a night out, which you know,

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Speaker 1: it's quite new and exciting to have it. I'm in

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Speaker 1: this house that we spent all out of time and

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Speaker 1: money on and making coffee and my coffee machine. I mean,

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Speaker 1: there are those moments where but they're rare ones because

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Speaker 1: they're ones where you've gone. If I renovate my house,

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Speaker 1: and if I get my daughter through high school, and

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Speaker 1: if my son likes music like I do, those are

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Speaker 1: the sort of things that will make me happy, and

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Speaker 1: if I have a good coffee machine, And often they

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Speaker 1: are false. And then every now and then you get

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Speaker 1: day where you're like, ah that I thought this shit

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Speaker 1: would make me happy, and usually usually so I thought

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Speaker 1: it would make me happy and then didn't. And the

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Speaker 1: happiness comes at you from the side in a moment

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Speaker 1: you weren't expecting. And that's a hard lesson to learn.

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Speaker 1: I mean, I say it in my little book I've

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Speaker 1: just put out, don't see happiness. Happiness is like an orgasm.

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Speaker 1: If you think about it too much, it goes away.

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Speaker 1: I think happiness is the side effect, and you should

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Speaker 1: be very careful about pursuing it. And you'll notice that

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Speaker 1: all those things when you send them back to me.

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Speaker 1: I was a bit mortified to realize they're all goal

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Speaker 1: or into which there's something about my brain. I need

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Speaker 1: a task now.

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Speaker 3: But that's interesting, Like what's that mortification? Because it's you,

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Speaker 3: but it's but that's also that's who you are, and

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Speaker 3: in a way, it's like it's how you achieve the extraordinary,

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Speaker 3: very very very idiosyncratic things that you tim achieve, and

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Speaker 3: you being goal oriented, I wish that you would rethink

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Speaker 3: your mortification.

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Speaker 1: Well it's not a horrific mortification, but it's like, oh, yeah,

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Speaker 1: that clocks that's me. Yeah, I like to have a

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Speaker 1: goal and do it and then have a beer at

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Speaker 1: the end with my family. That I'm a pretty simple orrobot.

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Speaker 1: Really I need a thing to feel like I've achieved,

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Speaker 1: and then that's just a relaxation of me.

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Speaker 3: So what quality do you like least about yourself?

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Speaker 1: Probably related to that need to achieve, which I don't

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Speaker 1: know if I like it. The thing I think is

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Speaker 1: a bit of a trial. Is it slightly re inless

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Speaker 1: sense that I need to do something more to prove

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Speaker 1: myself to myself or something. It's a bit tiring when

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Speaker 1: it works, tiresome to be needing to prove myself to myself.

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Speaker 3: Who is the you that is proving and who is

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Speaker 3: the you that needs to be proved too.

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Speaker 1: I've talked about this idea that I think maybe just

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Speaker 1: second child stuff or whatever, or going to a boys'

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Speaker 1: school where you kind of made you feel like if

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Speaker 1: you're not whatever footy player. There's a bit of that stuff.

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Speaker 1: But also because I've got a lot of closed doors

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Speaker 1: in my career as a musician and an actor and artist.

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Speaker 1: There are a lot of closed doors for about ten years,

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Speaker 1: which in hindsight, of course, were the best thing that

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Speaker 1: could have possibly happened, because it made me work out

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Speaker 1: and got me where I got. But I think those

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Speaker 1: closed doors gave me a little mechanism in my brain

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Speaker 1: that has a bit of a I'll show them, and

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Speaker 1: the me I'm proving myself too could also be described

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Speaker 1: as this esoteric them. But there is no there. There

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Speaker 1: is an I'll show them training in my brain, and

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Speaker 1: I think artists get that all the time, a bit yeah,

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Speaker 1: well you oh idea all the time.

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Speaker 3: And I've only recently started asking myself who who the

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Speaker 3: fuck is the them? Who is the them? And why

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Speaker 3: do I think they care?

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Speaker 1: They don't care. In fact, the people who said no

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Speaker 1: to me, I'm very happy for me. I know people

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Speaker 1: who said no to me, You're like, oh, you did

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Speaker 1: so well, so great, Like there's no one to prove

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Speaker 1: itself to. And that's connected to the other thing that

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Speaker 1: I think is unattractive in me, which is I can

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Speaker 1: get a bit sort of how dare they know? A

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Speaker 1: bit righteous when I'm unfairly criticized or i feel like

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Speaker 1: I've been mistreated, or specifically, if i feel like I've

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Speaker 1: been treated in a manner that I would not treat others.

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Speaker 1: I'm not claiming any sort of ethical even goodness, let

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Speaker 1: alone perfection, but I have a very this is the

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Speaker 1: right way to treat people, and this is how one

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Speaker 1: should behave And when I'm treated in a way that

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Speaker 1: I don't think I'll trick someone else. I have a

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Speaker 1: tendency to be a bit right and it's not really attractive.

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Speaker 1: You need to be able to take listenings and arrows

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Speaker 1: with humility, and I worked on that as well. But yeah,

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Speaker 1: I can get a bit defensive and a bit like

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Speaker 1: not being treated well and I'm going to write a

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Speaker 1: strongly worded letter. And I was like, oh, shut, you're

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Speaker 1: all right.

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Speaker 3: By the way, my boyfriend is constantly telling me that

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Speaker 3: I need to write a book for the lou called

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Speaker 3: a strongly worded letter because hot but him, I'm not joking.

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Speaker 3: I think that we should because it is it is

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Speaker 3: the funniest thing. Like he's walked into the kitchen on

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Speaker 3: more than one occasion, and he's like, what are you doing.

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Speaker 3: I was like, I'm writing to the New York Times

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Speaker 3: about the first so I would not include the word

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Speaker 3: dyke d y k e in Word today or some

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Speaker 3: show that they've changed the design A write righteousness is

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Speaker 3: Oh my god, it's hilarious.

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Speaker 1: I've got a fire called unsent Angry Letters.

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Speaker 3: I think we should make a compilation and we should

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Speaker 3: just solicit letters from people that we.

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Speaker 1: Know, Yeah, and take all the identifying factors out of it.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, exactly.

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Speaker 1: I read one the other day I wrote years ago

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Speaker 1: where I pulled out of a corporate geek and I

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Speaker 1: pulled out hugely apologetically, with plenty of time. I got

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Speaker 1: a really good role in something. It was like a

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Speaker 1: major thing, and I pulled out and they tried to

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Speaker 1: sue me for the money and all that letter was hilarious.

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Speaker 1: It was like so shaming and so self rutchous. I

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Speaker 1: write them for myself.

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Speaker 3: I do send my word spelling Being connections letters to

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Speaker 3: the New York Times and they never write back.

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Speaker 1: I was doing spelling be today and they wouldn't let

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Speaker 1: me have na fair enough Pali pali as in pay

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Speaker 1: like he's a bit pally with me.

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Speaker 3: I think there's all sorts of words that at Anglo

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Speaker 3: Australian was that they just won't have any chance. That's

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Speaker 3: what person, place, or experience most altered your life.

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Speaker 1: Well, see, I'm I'm a determinist fetishist, as in I

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Speaker 1: I am.

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Speaker 2: I'm writing that down.

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Speaker 3: Hold on, I love that determinist fe.

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Speaker 1: As in I am. I was on stage, they're not

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Speaker 1: doing an interview, and I sort of made the point

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Speaker 1: that the fact that you came to the show to

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Speaker 1: know if you're in a relationship with someone and you

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Speaker 1: intend to have children, the fact that you came to

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Speaker 1: see me speech to night and that I am saying

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Speaker 1: a sentence will change the child you have, because everything does,

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Speaker 1: because the chance of you having any one child is

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Speaker 1: a swimm into one. And so just the fact that

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Speaker 1: I'm talking a bit long now means you're with this

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Speaker 1: theater two seconds later than you would and everything from

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Speaker 1: that moment forward will be slightly different than it would

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Speaker 1: have been. Everything everything that you touch from that moment

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Speaker 1: forward will be slightly different, and therefore your child will

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Speaker 1: be a different child. Because I said the sentence track

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Speaker 1: and so I fare to show that butterfly wing, flat stuff.

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Speaker 1: So it's hard. I like to think about the tiny,

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Speaker 1: tiny things that changed everything. I can't name, and I don't.

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Speaker 2: That you could change.

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Speaker 1: It's all of them, right, it's every every choice changes.

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Speaker 3: Right then, can you tell me when that in your life?

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Speaker 3: Do you remember when feeling that you were a determinist

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Speaker 3: fetishist began?

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Speaker 1: Like?

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Speaker 2: Were you very young?

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Speaker 3: Was that something that you were conscious of suddenly going,

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Speaker 3: Oh my god, I believe in every single thing affects

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Speaker 3: every thing.

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Speaker 1: I was trying to figure that out. I've been playing

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Speaker 1: a song in my latest tour called Understand that has

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Speaker 1: a middle eight in the song just as this loop

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Speaker 1: that goes you believe in fate? I guess I believe

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Speaker 1: in consequence and flapping butterflies and photographs and it's all

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Speaker 1: just about this. And I'm like, oh that I wrote

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Speaker 1: that in two thousand and two. I was in my twenties.

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Speaker 1: Oh right, this stuff is earlier than I thought I

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Speaker 1: would have pegged it as in my thirties. I think

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Speaker 1: I was really issued into journalism before I really got

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Speaker 1: my head around free will and the problem with free

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Speaker 1: will anyway, What was the question, what personal? It was?

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Speaker 3: What personal place or experience most altered your life. But

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Speaker 3: that's such an interesting answer because the answer.

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Speaker 1: Is all moments always, all.

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Speaker 3: Moments affected, all moments affected, all moments affected moments.

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Speaker 1: I think that's right. The particular jiz that my dad

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Speaker 1: did on a train to Edinburgh in nineteen seventy five

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Speaker 1: is the main event that after everything.

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Speaker 2: That way is that where you work and see.

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Speaker 1: I believe I was considered back with my mom's just

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Speaker 1: diver well a year ago now and so I'm sorry

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Speaker 1: I used to not say particular things. Now I've been

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Speaker 1: saying whatever I want. No, the story goes my dad

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Speaker 1: and mum were on a sleeper trained to Edinburgh.

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Speaker 2: Oh that's very romantic.

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Speaker 1: That's why.

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Speaker 2: Maybe that is why you rock and roll.

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Speaker 3: But I also I like how you what did you

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Speaker 3: just call it awayward jizz?

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Speaker 1: Yeah, there's lots of little moments that changed my career.

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Speaker 1: And I suppose because I've had this one relationship in

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Speaker 1: my life, Sarah, who I met when I was seventeen.

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Speaker 1: That's sort of turning up on the first day of

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Speaker 1: UNI and seeing this girl I've met before and finding

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Speaker 1: out we had all the same lectures. I mean that

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Speaker 1: it's it's hard to put any quantity on her influence

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Speaker 1: on my work. I guess I would have been a musician.

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Speaker 1: I would have been an artist whatever I think it's

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Speaker 1: built to do. But my first girlfriend happened to be

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Speaker 1: someone who suited me. But it is very unusual in

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Speaker 1: this day and age and in our industry to have

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Speaker 1: one relationship and to have to fall in love with

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Speaker 1: someone who's so different in it, so compatible, and who

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Speaker 1: has been so unbelievably supportive of every eight hours of

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Speaker 1: weeding I've ever wanted to do. She's like, all right,

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Speaker 1: if you want to do weeding, or you want to

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Speaker 1: write an orchestra tour, or you know, you want to

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Speaker 1: have kids and move to England when I'm six months

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Speaker 1: pregnant with that first child, Okay, we're moving to England.

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Speaker 1: She's not a pushover, she's just up for it. And

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Speaker 1: that's obviously massively influential in allowing me to do what

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Speaker 1: I've ended up doing. Yeah, it's a.

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Speaker 2: Little true lovely Sarah. Give her a big hug from me, please.

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Speaker 1: I'll do that. She's Quoked's hell at the moment, is she? Yeah,

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Speaker 1: look after yourself. I'm doing a podcast.

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Speaker 3: In your life, and I know that this going to

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Speaker 3: dovetail into something else that I just said, But I'm

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Speaker 3: asking you in your life, can you tell me about

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Speaker 3: something that has grown out of a personal disaster.

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Speaker 1: Oh? Yeah. That's one of the great bits of learning

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Speaker 1: that you can only get from time, is that everything

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Speaker 1: that seems bad at the time because everything that happens

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Speaker 1: after any given event is dependent on that event to happen.

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Speaker 1: Because there is no faith and no God with my worldview,

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Speaker 1: with all due respect to people who believe in fate

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Speaker 1: and God, because it's just a deterministic thing. Every disaster

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Speaker 1: is the shit in which all your future flowers grow.

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Speaker 1: And getting your head around that is really great bit

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Speaker 1: of wisdom, and it's very hard to apply in the moment.

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Speaker 1: When the next bad thing happens, you think, well, hold on,

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Speaker 1: I've learned that when bad things happen, they are the

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Speaker 1: shit in which future flowers grow. It that's just how

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Speaker 1: causality works. But in the moment you still ray on

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Speaker 1: against it. Of course you do. It's a negative thing.

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Speaker 1: It's a tortered expectation. It's a thing about which you're

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Speaker 1: going to write and anyway later. But I think it

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Speaker 1: would be true wisdom to be able to, in the

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Speaker 1: moment of disaster, access your knowledge that out of this

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Speaker 1: desans will grow something beautiful.

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Speaker 3: I've banged on about that since I was in my

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Speaker 3: late teens early twenties, of how it is possible that

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Speaker 3: this duality exists, that one can categorically know what you're

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Speaker 3: saying is true, which is, I know that something good,

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Speaker 3: invariably something else, not just good, something else is going

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Speaker 3: to grow out of this.

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Speaker 1: Unless nothing good is ever going to happen again, everything

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Speaker 1: future good will rely on this moment.

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Speaker 3: How can we become experientially so shit? How can one

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Speaker 3: hold both those things to be true? Is that just

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Speaker 3: fundamentally being a human being that you're experiencing a terrible time?

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Speaker 3: How can one fully piggyback onto the notion that this

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Speaker 3: is going to create something else, interesting, good, whatever adjectivity

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Speaker 3: you want to use, something else will grow out of this.

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Speaker 1: Shit Because you'd be a psycho, you'd be a psycho

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Speaker 1: robot to be able to just skip a step, because

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Speaker 1: the whole reason the good stuff comes is because you

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Speaker 1: don't skip a step because you rail against what you've lost,

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Speaker 1: or you rail against your thoughts of expectation, or you

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Speaker 1: grieve for your mum, or you grieve for your relationship,

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Speaker 1: or you grieve for the four years you spent working

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Speaker 1: on an animated film in LA and then get shut

401
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Speaker 1: down or whatever like. But I got to meet me drag.

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Speaker 1: So there's personal stuff everyone goes through. But in terms

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Speaker 1: of a sort of more illustrative thing is my experience

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Speaker 1: of my movie in La America, Harry, in my movie

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Speaker 1: the Dream Wreaks film, we spent years building this thing

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Speaker 1: and it was going to be amazing, and then the

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Speaker 1: studio got sold and I got shut.

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Speaker 3: Down, and it really was four years work, right, Yeah,

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Speaker 3: I mean, and that's when we met.

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Speaker 2: It was in that period because we lived in a

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Speaker 2: neighborhoods So.

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Speaker 1: In hindsight, we had a great time in LA, but

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Speaker 1: I didn't both been Broadway in LA. I've had fantastic

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Speaker 1: times and met fantastic people, the artists and practitioners, I've

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Speaker 1: met some of my favorite people in the world. But

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Speaker 1: the businesses were ruthleous and yell and shitting and unethical.

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Speaker 3: And all against the backdrop of the sunniest most blue sky,

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Speaker 3: easy going.

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Speaker 2: It's such a fucking line.

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Speaker 1: It's so weird, and everyone's complicit and I didn't want

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Speaker 1: to be complicit. But anyway, I came back to Australia,

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Speaker 1: not with my tailor between my legs. We were always

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Speaker 1: going to move back to Australia after the film, and

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Speaker 1: I was very grumpy. I was really that was a

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Speaker 1: huge thought of expectation. I really didn't like that someone

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Speaker 1: had stolen my time and my heart. Yeah, I felt

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Speaker 1: really the opportunity cost of what I could have been doing.

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Speaker 1: I felt really cross. And then this project came about

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Speaker 1: that became a TV show called Upright, which I was

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Speaker 1: the sort of head writer on and active in. And

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Speaker 1: not only what I have not been able to help

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Speaker 1: create Upright if I haven't gone through that, but I

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Speaker 1: put this actual lesson that we're talking about into Upright,

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Speaker 1: because Upright it's about a guy who's got this shit

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Speaker 1: in his past that he can't get past, and he

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Speaker 1: has to get to this place that you were just

437
00:23:19,440 --> 00:23:23,359
Speaker 1: asking your rhetorical ish question about. He has to get

438
00:23:23,400 --> 00:23:26,640
Speaker 1: to the point of realization that we are not ourselves

439
00:23:27,040 --> 00:23:31,160
Speaker 1: despite our scars. We are ourselves because of our scars.

440
00:23:31,200 --> 00:23:34,480
Speaker 1: We are beautiful because of our messiness and our errors.

441
00:23:34,560 --> 00:23:37,960
Speaker 1: And you know, in the final episode, of season one

442
00:23:38,000 --> 00:23:41,840
Speaker 1: of Upright. He actually he's giving a piano to a child,

443
00:23:41,880 --> 00:23:46,280
Speaker 1: and he's describing the piano, but really he's describing himself. Well,

444
00:23:46,600 --> 00:23:49,480
Speaker 1: he's tropping. He probably doesn't know that's what he's doing,

445
00:23:49,480 --> 00:23:51,280
Speaker 1: but he's saying, it's all scratch, it's a bit out

446
00:23:51,280 --> 00:23:52,960
Speaker 1: of tune, but that's what makes it what it is.

447
00:23:53,000 --> 00:23:54,840
Speaker 1: And you know, you should just play it and don't

448
00:23:54,840 --> 00:23:57,480
Speaker 1: worry about making mistakes because sometimes when you make mistakes,

449
00:23:57,480 --> 00:24:00,600
Speaker 1: you make something accidentally beautiful. This is this monogue in

450
00:24:00,600 --> 00:24:03,040
Speaker 1: the final and I didn't realize that what I was

451
00:24:03,080 --> 00:24:07,199
Speaker 1: doing was making sense. I was using my art to

452
00:24:07,280 --> 00:24:09,920
Speaker 1: make sense of my lost art. And I know it's

453
00:24:09,960 --> 00:24:12,560
Speaker 1: not a big deal. Many worse things can happen then

454
00:24:12,640 --> 00:24:15,879
Speaker 1: losing a few years work, but just an illustrative idea.

455
00:24:16,240 --> 00:24:20,679
Speaker 1: I guess how I love that lesson in a really

456
00:24:20,720 --> 00:24:24,399
Speaker 1: profound way. As you say, though, applying it in the

457
00:24:24,480 --> 00:24:30,440
Speaker 1: moment when shit's going wrong is perhaps understandably impossible, because.

458
00:24:30,119 --> 00:24:32,000
Speaker 3: You still have to and maybe that's the point, like

459
00:24:32,040 --> 00:24:33,919
Speaker 3: you said, you have to go through the steps of

460
00:24:33,960 --> 00:24:37,920
Speaker 3: the experience because we're here in this experiential reality, and

461
00:24:37,920 --> 00:24:41,840
Speaker 3: that it's later with further reflection that you can perhaps

462
00:24:41,880 --> 00:24:45,200
Speaker 3: again distill. I hesitate to use the word meaning because

463
00:24:45,200 --> 00:24:49,560
Speaker 3: I'm actually a bit anti meaning. I don't really like meaning.

464
00:24:49,640 --> 00:24:52,840
Speaker 3: I don't like the assigning of meaning because it feels

465
00:24:52,880 --> 00:24:55,440
Speaker 3: full of dogma and that.

466
00:24:55,760 --> 00:24:58,320
Speaker 2: My meaning is more meaningful than your meaning. I think

467
00:24:58,359 --> 00:24:58,879
Speaker 2: it's bollock.

468
00:24:59,520 --> 00:25:02,240
Speaker 1: Just be obnoxious and quote. You know I was saying

469
00:25:02,280 --> 00:25:04,560
Speaker 1: earlier about that middle eight that has everyone will also

470
00:25:04,600 --> 00:25:07,240
Speaker 1: the lyric before that, yes, yes, the lyric before that

471
00:25:07,440 --> 00:25:10,760
Speaker 1: is it's not karmic destiny. It's just consequenced avoid of

472
00:25:10,880 --> 00:25:14,520
Speaker 1: meaning makes us miss the issue anyway. So it's just

473
00:25:14,600 --> 00:25:17,520
Speaker 1: I just felt like i'd missed out that lyrics. Yeah,

474
00:25:17,560 --> 00:25:19,480
Speaker 1: I think, yeah, looking for me.

475
00:25:19,840 --> 00:25:21,880
Speaker 2: I think it's a bumsteer. I think it's.

476
00:25:23,440 --> 00:25:25,800
Speaker 3: Yeah, that doesn't exist in America. That would not be

477
00:25:25,840 --> 00:25:27,520
Speaker 3: a phrase on anything ever.

478
00:25:27,560 --> 00:25:28,160
Speaker 2: In America.

479
00:25:28,359 --> 00:25:46,040
Speaker 3: A bomsteer doesn't exist. What question would you most like answered? Hmm?

480
00:25:46,560 --> 00:25:48,280
Speaker 1: I want to give a flip and answer, but I

481
00:25:48,280 --> 00:25:57,840
Speaker 1: can't even think of one of them. Eight sevens seven

482
00:25:57,880 --> 00:26:01,720
Speaker 1: eight fifty six. Yeah, that's my favorite. I got to say,

483
00:26:01,920 --> 00:26:06,680
Speaker 1: I love the unpacking more than anything else in my life,

484
00:26:06,720 --> 00:26:12,640
Speaker 1: you know, like I am really disinclined to be attracted

485
00:26:12,800 --> 00:26:14,720
Speaker 1: to answers that are simple.

486
00:26:14,760 --> 00:26:17,280
Speaker 2: So you like questions, I like questions.

487
00:26:17,040 --> 00:26:20,600
Speaker 1: Answers, I don't want anything answered. I want to constantly

488
00:26:20,720 --> 00:26:25,199
Speaker 1: be chipping away. And I really like And maybe it

489
00:26:25,240 --> 00:26:29,240
Speaker 1: makes me a buffoon, a wanker, or certainly a sophist,

490
00:26:29,440 --> 00:26:35,080
Speaker 1: but I really like a Priori contemplation. It was the

491
00:26:35,119 --> 00:26:37,720
Speaker 1: same when I was at Uni, like doing my aunt's degree,

492
00:26:37,960 --> 00:26:40,399
Speaker 1: I would always get my best grades when I didn't

493
00:26:40,400 --> 00:26:44,160
Speaker 1: go to the library at all and I didn't read anything,

494
00:26:44,440 --> 00:26:49,199
Speaker 1: and I just went at it. And I think I'm

495
00:26:49,960 --> 00:26:52,280
Speaker 1: for good or ill. I really don't want to know

496
00:26:52,359 --> 00:26:55,720
Speaker 1: what other people have made it at all. It's the

497
00:26:55,760 --> 00:26:59,600
Speaker 1: same with musical theater. Right before I wrote Matilda, I

498
00:26:59,600 --> 00:27:03,840
Speaker 1: have I studied a musical theater score. I'm not particularly

499
00:27:04,119 --> 00:27:07,720
Speaker 1: like I love musicals, but I'm not trained. I can't

500
00:27:07,760 --> 00:27:10,560
Speaker 1: read the music. I didn't go looking for what Sondeine

501
00:27:10,640 --> 00:27:13,239
Speaker 1: does or what Moieber and Jim Rice do. I just

502
00:27:13,320 --> 00:27:17,680
Speaker 1: went what would majit are? Seeing? Like I really liked

503
00:27:17,840 --> 00:27:20,520
Speaker 1: sitting down with Dennis Kelly, who had also never written

504
00:27:20,520 --> 00:27:22,760
Speaker 1: a musical, and just going how do we make this

505
00:27:22,840 --> 00:27:25,879
Speaker 1: story make people feel things? And I feel that about

506
00:27:25,960 --> 00:27:29,240
Speaker 1: life and about comedy. I've never analyzed comedy. I've not

507
00:27:29,440 --> 00:27:32,320
Speaker 1: ever watched much of it. I just don't want to

508
00:27:32,440 --> 00:27:35,280
Speaker 1: know what other people's answers are. I want to find

509
00:27:35,320 --> 00:27:39,360
Speaker 1: out my version of the answer. It's probably really arrogant

510
00:27:39,480 --> 00:27:42,639
Speaker 1: or something, but it's just served me being like, what

511
00:27:42,640 --> 00:27:45,639
Speaker 1: do I think about this? I'm a secret of answers

512
00:27:46,240 --> 00:27:49,359
Speaker 1: in like bashing through the bush kind of way, not

513
00:27:49,480 --> 00:27:52,399
Speaker 1: in that kind of looking for what someone else figured

514
00:27:52,400 --> 00:27:55,359
Speaker 1: out kind of way. Obviously with a million fucking exceptions,

515
00:27:55,560 --> 00:27:59,800
Speaker 1: including seven which I couldn't possibly do myself.

516
00:28:00,000 --> 00:28:01,320
Speaker 2: I love that answer.

517
00:28:01,680 --> 00:28:04,919
Speaker 3: It's very there's a real cook quote that's been in

518
00:28:04,960 --> 00:28:09,040
Speaker 3: a thousand sort of marriage for our ceremonies paraphrasing with

519
00:28:09,160 --> 00:28:11,480
Speaker 3: you sort of remain interested in the question. You eventually

520
00:28:11,520 --> 00:28:15,320
Speaker 3: live the answers, So just ask those questions that you

521
00:28:15,400 --> 00:28:18,880
Speaker 3: feel rather than seek the answer. Yeah, I think that is, and.

522
00:28:18,840 --> 00:28:21,600
Speaker 1: Not to get mine in the kind of question of

523
00:28:21,680 --> 00:28:24,639
Speaker 1: our time too much. But I've got off social media

524
00:28:24,680 --> 00:28:26,560
Speaker 1: and I finally got got a place in my life

525
00:28:26,600 --> 00:28:31,080
Speaker 1: where my phone is not governing my input. And one

526
00:28:31,080 --> 00:28:34,920
Speaker 1: of the reasons I got offer is it seems to

527
00:28:35,080 --> 00:28:40,880
Speaker 1: engender in curiosity, even whilst making people feel like they're

528
00:28:40,880 --> 00:28:44,120
Speaker 1: being really curious, because I feel like they're getting information

529
00:28:44,240 --> 00:28:46,920
Speaker 1: and they're learning stuff. But there's something about being fair

530
00:28:47,000 --> 00:28:51,560
Speaker 1: information all the time that buggers up our unnatural curiosity.

531
00:28:51,680 --> 00:28:53,400
Speaker 1: And I don't want anyone to think I think everyone

532
00:28:53,440 --> 00:28:56,280
Speaker 1: should make up their own theories about what medicine works

533
00:28:56,400 --> 00:29:01,240
Speaker 1: or whatever. I'm a massive data and evidence a science nerd, right,

534
00:29:01,320 --> 00:29:03,880
Speaker 1: so I'm a fact guy. I'm not saying we should

535
00:29:03,880 --> 00:29:06,400
Speaker 1: all make up our own facts. I just think we

536
00:29:06,440 --> 00:29:11,040
Speaker 1: should embrace creating an environment for oneself where your natural

537
00:29:11,120 --> 00:29:15,800
Speaker 1: curiosity and your own capacity to unpacked meaning to generate

538
00:29:15,880 --> 00:29:19,560
Speaker 1: your own meaning, to figure out what you feel about

539
00:29:19,600 --> 00:29:24,440
Speaker 1: the big questions about life and death and ethics and parenting,

540
00:29:24,520 --> 00:29:26,280
Speaker 1: and like just giving yourself space.

541
00:29:26,440 --> 00:29:29,440
Speaker 3: I feel exactly the same way, and I feel exactly

542
00:29:29,480 --> 00:29:30,040
Speaker 3: the same way.

543
00:29:30,280 --> 00:29:33,320
Speaker 1: That's why we're going to be friends until we.

544
00:29:33,400 --> 00:29:36,480
Speaker 2: Exactly until we die.

545
00:29:39,720 --> 00:29:43,120
Speaker 3: What relationship, real or fictionalized, defines love for you?

546
00:29:44,400 --> 00:29:48,800
Speaker 1: I don't know. I think i'd be making it up.

547
00:29:48,920 --> 00:29:49,800
Speaker 1: Just say though, is why?

548
00:29:49,880 --> 00:29:50,000
Speaker 3: Man?

549
00:29:50,040 --> 00:29:52,760
Speaker 2: Well, what define give me the tenets of what defines

550
00:29:52,880 --> 00:29:53,640
Speaker 2: love for you?

551
00:29:54,040 --> 00:29:57,320
Speaker 1: Because I haven't had many romantic relationships. Sarah and my

552
00:29:57,400 --> 00:29:59,760
Speaker 1: relationship grew out of a friendship and I felt in

553
00:29:59,760 --> 00:30:05,200
Speaker 1: love her, But I don't have be romantic. I'll tell

554
00:30:05,240 --> 00:30:06,479
Speaker 1: you what defines much for me.

555
00:30:06,960 --> 00:30:09,360
Speaker 2: Yeah, because it doesn't have to be romantic, and.

556
00:30:09,280 --> 00:30:15,720
Speaker 1: It's quite pedestrian, and it will make me seem nauseatingly auxorious.

557
00:30:16,320 --> 00:30:18,560
Speaker 1: Although I think auxorious has been.

558
00:30:18,640 --> 00:30:23,680
Speaker 2: I think using the word auxorious means is quite nauseating.

559
00:30:23,760 --> 00:30:26,160
Speaker 1: Yeah, so for the people who aren't wainkers enough to

560
00:30:26,200 --> 00:30:29,800
Speaker 1: know the word uxorias means inordinately fond of one's wife,

561
00:30:30,120 --> 00:30:34,240
Speaker 1: too fond of one's wife, and auxoria's implies that it's

562
00:30:34,280 --> 00:30:38,640
Speaker 1: a little bit nauseating. Anyway, this is what I understand

563
00:30:38,720 --> 00:30:41,680
Speaker 1: about Sarah and me. We are so different, like you've

564
00:30:41,680 --> 00:30:43,720
Speaker 1: met us both. I mean, we couldn't be more.

565
00:30:43,480 --> 00:30:45,400
Speaker 3: You couldn't be more different, And the fact that you've

566
00:30:45,440 --> 00:30:49,200
Speaker 3: jumped on the same train of your lives together is

567
00:30:49,640 --> 00:30:50,920
Speaker 3: fantastic and amazing.

568
00:30:51,040 --> 00:30:54,960
Speaker 1: What the great stroke of luck is. Notwithstanding to early

569
00:30:55,040 --> 00:31:02,080
Speaker 1: where she's disgusting and snotchy and gross, I'm not so

570
00:31:02,240 --> 00:31:05,840
Speaker 1: good with sick people. I'm like, apparently, no, I'll bring

571
00:31:05,880 --> 00:31:07,720
Speaker 1: you to a cup of tea but get out of

572
00:31:07,760 --> 00:31:11,200
Speaker 1: my face. I basically have been with Sarah for the

573
00:31:11,280 --> 00:31:15,040
Speaker 1: vast majority of the last thirty one years, and when

574
00:31:15,760 --> 00:31:19,280
Speaker 1: she goes upstairs to do something and comes back down

575
00:31:19,920 --> 00:31:22,920
Speaker 1: and comes into the room, I'm in the kitchen. I mean,

576
00:31:22,960 --> 00:31:26,040
Speaker 1: I basically am happy to see her when she walks

577
00:31:26,080 --> 00:31:28,760
Speaker 1: into the kitchen. And that is not something I did.

578
00:31:28,800 --> 00:31:31,600
Speaker 1: That's not a choice I made. It doesn't mean I'm like,

579
00:31:31,760 --> 00:31:35,560
Speaker 1: oh my god, so hot, and I just, of course

580
00:31:35,680 --> 00:31:39,280
Speaker 1: we are normal people in a relationship that's been around.

581
00:31:39,280 --> 00:31:41,640
Speaker 1: We've had kids and we've watched them grow up, and

582
00:31:41,680 --> 00:31:46,040
Speaker 1: we're not like fizzying with But the fact is, I'm

583
00:31:46,200 --> 00:31:49,440
Speaker 1: very rarely over thirty one years, have not wanted her

584
00:31:49,560 --> 00:31:52,440
Speaker 1: to walk into any room I'm in, And that is

585
00:31:53,120 --> 00:31:55,720
Speaker 1: That's what defines love for me. It's just we just

586
00:31:55,800 --> 00:31:59,080
Speaker 1: happen to be a functional paer and we like seeing

587
00:31:59,080 --> 00:32:02,680
Speaker 1: each other walk into that and I think we'll probably

588
00:32:02,720 --> 00:32:05,680
Speaker 1: go the whole way. I mean, you've come with my God.

589
00:32:05,760 --> 00:32:09,960
Speaker 3: I love that answer. I love that answer. I love

590
00:32:10,040 --> 00:32:12,960
Speaker 3: all your answers. I knew the excellent talking to you.

591
00:32:13,600 --> 00:32:15,800
Speaker 1: This is why I don't read questions, because I would

592
00:32:15,880 --> 00:32:17,640
Speaker 1: be worse if I've read them.

593
00:32:18,360 --> 00:32:21,040
Speaker 3: It's right for you. It's absolutely right for you. It's

594
00:32:21,080 --> 00:32:25,120
Speaker 3: funny the humanness of people invariably seeps out even when

595
00:32:25,160 --> 00:32:28,240
Speaker 3: there's a prepared answer. I've noticed even when.

596
00:32:28,080 --> 00:32:31,880
Speaker 2: People have what to say, probably big question.

597
00:32:32,040 --> 00:32:36,640
Speaker 3: What's interesting is how people like you and everyone that

598
00:32:36,680 --> 00:32:40,479
Speaker 3: I interview bellies up to answering a question that is

599
00:32:40,600 --> 00:32:44,440
Speaker 3: asking something of them, is asking for some excavation, and

600
00:32:44,480 --> 00:32:47,840
Speaker 3: even the most prosaic answers invariably lead their way into

601
00:32:48,120 --> 00:32:51,520
Speaker 3: stuff that is much more raw, rawer.

602
00:32:55,000 --> 00:33:00,600
Speaker 1: Your Americans.

603
00:32:59,440 --> 00:33:04,000
Speaker 3: Mirror for my favorite episode potentially of thirty Rock, the.

604
00:33:03,960 --> 00:33:07,440
Speaker 2: Rural Durer, the Rural Duror.

605
00:33:07,840 --> 00:33:10,880
Speaker 3: You're an angel for taking time out of your wine drinking,

606
00:33:11,120 --> 00:33:14,480
Speaker 3: your sick wife and your tour to come and talk

607
00:33:14,520 --> 00:33:16,720
Speaker 3: to me. And I just couldn't appreciate it more. I

608
00:33:16,840 --> 00:33:18,760
Speaker 3: fucking wish that we live next door to each other.

609
00:33:18,800 --> 00:33:22,240
Speaker 3: I'm so annoyed. Thank you so much, Tim, Loads of

610
00:33:22,280 --> 00:33:28,120
Speaker 3: love Tea. Mini Questions is hosted and written by Me,

611
00:33:28,440 --> 00:33:33,040
Speaker 3: Mini Driver, executive produced by me and Aaron Kaufman, with

612
00:33:33,160 --> 00:33:37,560
Speaker 3: production support from Jennifer Bassett, Zoe Denkler, and Ali Perry.

613
00:33:38,120 --> 00:33:41,920
Speaker 3: The theme music is also by Me and additional music

614
00:33:42,360 --> 00:33:46,880
Speaker 3: by Aaron Kaufman. Special thanks to Jim Nikolay Addison, O'Day,

615
00:33:47,400 --> 00:33:51,840
Speaker 3: Henry Driver, Lisa castella, A, Nick oppenheim, A, Nick Muller

616
00:33:52,120 --> 00:33:56,640
Speaker 3: and Annette wolf A, w kPr, Will Pearson, Nicki Etoor,

617
00:33:57,160 --> 00:33:59,840
Speaker 3: Morgan Levoy and Mangesh had tick at