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Speaker 1: What's Up Tribe.

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Speaker 2: I'm Erica and I'm Mila, and this is Good.

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Speaker 3: Mom's Bad Choices Podcast.

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Speaker 4: Beach season two.

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Speaker 2: If you joined us for season one, you got three

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Speaker 2: hundred uncensored episodes.

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Speaker 1: But things are a little different in twenty twenty four.

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Speaker 1: Not only are we.

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Speaker 3: Having new guests, new segments, but we're going outside, y'all.

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Speaker 3: We're getting out of our studio and podcasting in the wild,

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Speaker 3: So make sure you check us out on YouTube to

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Speaker 3: see where we're headed next.

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Speaker 2: This podcast is for all the good moms, all the

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Speaker 2: good dads, and even y'all hain't got no kids.

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Speaker 1: Pull up.

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Speaker 4: Join us in season two.

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Speaker 2: As we deep dive into even more uncensored topics like love, sex, dating, and.

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Speaker 1: Just look at this as the ultimate group chat.

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Speaker 3: All the shit you're afraid to say out loud or

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Speaker 3: even try, We say it and do it for you.

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Speaker 4: Because nothing's off limits here.

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Speaker 3: This is a judgment free zone to show up exactly

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Speaker 3: as you are, and let's be honest, we've all made

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Speaker 3: a few bad choices, so sit back, relax, and enjoy

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Speaker 3: the ride.

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Speaker 1: This bitch is always late.

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Speaker 5: M surprised surprise, Happy Valentine today, So cute the same

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Speaker 5: we are.

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Speaker 2: I love you, I love you, thank you.

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Speaker 1: Thank you for says smack my red shreds.

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Speaker 4: Did you come on? I am so ready, you're late.

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Speaker 1: Come on.

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Speaker 4: Only the best sold food.

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Speaker 1: Gon'd be war for your baby.

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Speaker 3: I'm black, Welcome back to good Mom's Bad Choices. I'm Erica,

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Speaker 3: and I'm Nila. Happy fucking Valentine's Day. Happy Valentine's Day, tribe.

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Speaker 3: So if you are listening right now, you might want

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Speaker 3: to check us out on YouTube because we are in

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Speaker 3: the wild again. We are out of the office, and

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Speaker 3: this time we came to Harold and Bell's, which is

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Speaker 3: a black owned restaurant in LA that we love, love, love,

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Speaker 3: And what better way to celebrate Valentine's d than even

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Speaker 3: some motherfucking creole soul food.

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Speaker 2: Right. Not only is Valentine's Day, it's Black History Months,

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Speaker 2: so you know you got to get all the black

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Speaker 2: owned good shit and our good friends here at Harolen Bell's.

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Speaker 2: Let us let me come take my wife on Valentine's Day,

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Speaker 2: because you know.

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Speaker 4: We like that VIP shit. We in the back and shit.

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Speaker 4: Only the best for my lady.

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Speaker 1: Thank you. I know me.

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Speaker 3: Look called me and was like, bitch, We're going to dinner

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Speaker 3: and you need to dress up so look cute.

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Speaker 1: And I was like, okay, hold on, and you.

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Speaker 2: Know, had a little pushback because it's not in the valley.

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Speaker 2: You know, valley girls very very rarely rear over the hill.

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Speaker 2: But when I tempted her with fried chicken and gumbo,

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Speaker 2: she was on the whizzays. So thank you for joining me,

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Speaker 2: my lon What else would I be on Valentine's Day?

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Speaker 1: Right with your wife exactly?

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Speaker 2: This episode is all about love and friendship and you.

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Speaker 4: Know, loving on your friends.

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Speaker 2: I think we forget to love on our friends because

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Speaker 2: we love on our niggas.

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Speaker 4: We're wasting all the love on the niggas.

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Speaker 2: Or bitches, you know, whoever you're romantically involved with.

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Speaker 6: But you know, I wanted to remind you how much

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Speaker 6: I love you, and you know, I just treat you

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Speaker 6: real nice and special and do something kind for you

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Speaker 6: so that we can take time to talk without business,

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Speaker 6: without the who well and you know, hang out and

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Speaker 6: hit well.

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Speaker 1: Thank you.

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Speaker 3: I appreciate that, And I think that's it was a

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Speaker 3: beautiful reminder because I think often we do forget like

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Speaker 3: we always are like brunching or like that's your girl day, right,

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Speaker 3: But like when you have a really intentional day where

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Speaker 3: it's like, hey, I want to have one on one

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Speaker 3: time with you, and I want to celebrate our friendship.

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Speaker 1: It's like not something that we I think do a

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Speaker 1: lot with our friends.

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Speaker 3: Were just like, yeah, bitch, let's just go have some

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Speaker 3: drinks and we'll talk about those niggas over the drinks.

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Speaker 1: So we might do that today, but cause we are bases.

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Speaker 3: But I just I just love being able to spend

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Speaker 3: time with you because I think in twenty twenty three,

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Speaker 3: so much of our alone time was about business, and

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Speaker 3: I think we're like raining our friendship back in to

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Speaker 3: remind ourselves.

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Speaker 1: Wait, hold on, let's cut the business.

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Speaker 3: Talk and let's just talk about, well, how are you doing,

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Speaker 3: how are you feeling?

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Speaker 1: Are you happy? Are you good?

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Speaker 4: Yeah? I am, I'm happy. I'm good.

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Speaker 1: Okay, good.

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Speaker 2: I know, but I think it's true not all best

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Speaker 2: friends are also in business with each other, which has

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Speaker 2: been quite the learning curve, but it does require that

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Speaker 2: we do it with intention and remember, yeah, I think

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Speaker 2: most of twenty twenty three, eighty nine percent of our

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Speaker 2: conversations were beginning and ending with business and.

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Speaker 4: What we needed to do.

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Speaker 2: And I think it's important to just slow down and

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Speaker 2: remember what's important, you know, because business is always going

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Speaker 2: to be there.

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Speaker 4: But our friendship requires nurturing.

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Speaker 2: You know. We call our friendship an entity because when

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Speaker 2: we met, something otherworldly took place, and so it does

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Speaker 2: require that it's nurtured.

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Speaker 1: Absolutely. Well.

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Speaker 7: Cheers to that, my dear, Oh cheers.

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Speaker 4: So you know I wanted to bring you here.

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Speaker 2: I drug you all the way from the valley, but

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Speaker 2: I wanted you to meet the owner of this restaurant,

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Speaker 2: Ryan Lego, and tell you a little bit about Haroland Bell's,

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Speaker 2: and tell you all about Harolin Bells because.

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Speaker 4: This is a landmark. Hi, Ryan, how's it going good?

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Speaker 8: Absolom for you to guys.

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Speaker 4: Thank you, yes, yes, thank you.

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Speaker 2: Come have a seat with us for a minute. I

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Speaker 2: appreciate you letting you know, letting us come here, bringing

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Speaker 2: my wife.

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Speaker 8: I'm glad to have you guys.

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Speaker 4: I haven't been here in a little bit.

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Speaker 1: It is.

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Speaker 4: It is a very special day. I haven't been here

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Speaker 4: in a long time, but I still to come here.

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Speaker 2: When I was a little girl, my dad used to

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Speaker 2: come pull up and bring me, so I know it's

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Speaker 2: been here for a long time.

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Speaker 4: Tell us about the restaurant.

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Speaker 9: All right, So would you say that's a familiar story?

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Speaker 9: Is generation started in nineteen sixty nine. The area itself,

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Speaker 9: Jefferson Park. This was like the settling round for people

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Speaker 9: coming to California from New Orleans in the forties, fifties

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Speaker 9: and sixties. So my grandparents were part of that migration,

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Speaker 9: so to speak, along with a bunch of their friends

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Speaker 9: and families. And what they wanted was they wanted to

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Speaker 9: play similar to New Orleans where they can come hang

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Speaker 9: out and gather.

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Speaker 8: You know.

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Speaker 9: It wasn't a restaurant then when it first started, and

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Speaker 9: food was like kind of an afterward. It was really

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Speaker 9: a spot to drink, to play cards, the bad horses,

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Speaker 9: and there was pool tables and jukebox and build the

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Speaker 9: dancers and things like that. So it's definitely evolved over

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Speaker 9: the years. That's how That's how it started, and there's

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Speaker 9: been a family affair ever since.

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Speaker 8: This is a year at Universe sixty four.

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Speaker 4: Wow, So you inherited this place.

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Speaker 9: You know, there was a financial transaction and it wasn't

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Speaker 9: just my parents, they had business partners also, you know,

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Speaker 9: so in the eighties they did a really big expansion,

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Speaker 9: you know, so there was other business partners involved other.

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Speaker 8: Than my family.

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Speaker 9: So they see want some real est stadiums and business

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Speaker 9: and other things you know of mont it so inherent.

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Speaker 9: I was in the first position to say, but you know,

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Speaker 9: a business deal still had to occur.

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Speaker 4: Basically you had to you had to pay too.

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Speaker 3: Is there anything on the menu that has been on

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Speaker 3: the menu from like the very beginning?

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Speaker 9: Yeah, gumbo, of course, gumbo fried, trim pried catfish, oyster

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Speaker 9: po boys. You know, I don't know if you notice

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Speaker 9: stuff prod in the restaurant. There is the original menu

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Speaker 9: up there right now. We're talking like trimp po boys

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Speaker 9: for seventy five cents.

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Speaker 4: Oh damn, A lot of times that changed.

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Speaker 2: You were just telling us how the City of Los

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Speaker 2: Angeles just made this area officially what was it.

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Speaker 8: The New Orleans Corridor.

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Speaker 9: So what that story I just told you is that

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Speaker 9: they made it officials this year by designating.

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Speaker 8: Jefferson Boulevard from where we are.

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Speaker 9: Jefferson and Tenth Avenue down the Holy Name of Jesus

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Speaker 9: Catholic Church, which was everyone's first church, those people moving

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Speaker 9: from New Orleans, very strong Catholic tradition.

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Speaker 8: It was everyone's first choice. Or our first church when

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Speaker 8: they moved to La.

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Speaker 1: Wow.

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Speaker 2: I didn't realize like the culture of like specifically like

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Speaker 2: creole people either, did I it was so strong in

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Speaker 2: La I mean I knew that there was like a

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Speaker 2: migration that happened from the South because of like the

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Speaker 2: like industrialism and stuff in business, like jobs opportunities opening up,

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Speaker 2: but I didn't realize specifically like New Orleans people were

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Speaker 2: you know right here in this area. Yeah.

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Speaker 8: I don't know how.

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Speaker 9: Distreat in particular ended up being able to have may

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Speaker 9: have had something to do with the church, but yeah, forties, fifties,

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Speaker 9: and sixties they were, they were here and they were

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Speaker 9: coming in ways. My grandfather came post World War two

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Speaker 9: when he was in the Navy, and uh, he had

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Speaker 9: a series of jobs and businesses before starting this. He

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Speaker 9: was kind of like a serial entrepreneur. So he had

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Speaker 9: a Texico franchise down the street. He had a painting business,

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Speaker 9: and he had a bike shop. And this was you know,

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Speaker 9: like the fourth or fifth one that he had. And

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Speaker 9: like I said, this was just like a joint. It

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Speaker 9: was not a restaurant.

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Speaker 3: You know. It's still was something that's been like provably

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Speaker 3: in your family obviously everyone eats, but it's it's cooking

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Speaker 3: in the house.

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Speaker 9: Yeah, you know, in New Orleans it's you know, it's

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Speaker 9: it's part life, right, And a lot of times it's men,

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Speaker 9: men doing a lot of the cooking, which is different

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Speaker 9: than other causes. I'm not saying that like the women

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Speaker 9: don't cook either, but I've felt like it's been a

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Speaker 9: larger portion of a little men and the Louisiana household

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Speaker 9: is cookin.

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Speaker 2: That's funny that you say that, because my dad cooks

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Speaker 2: in my household, Like in my house growing up, my

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Speaker 2: dad cooked, and even now in my household.

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Speaker 4: Like my boyfriend cooks.

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Speaker 2: And I was like, I I we get this image

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Speaker 2: that women are always the ones cooking and cleaning, but

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Speaker 2: I haven't really experienced that.

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Speaker 4: And I'm just thinking like.

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Speaker 2: The influx of just like the migration of how people

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Speaker 2: came in and how food was introduced to America's and

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Speaker 2: like how much we've influenced American cuisine and like just

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Speaker 2: even lies.

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Speaker 4: We've been told that women be in the kitchen.

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Speaker 2: Men have been prominently cooked in that, like you know,

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Speaker 2: in restaurants. And also I think probably after like slavery,

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Speaker 2: and they were.

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Speaker 4: Like let me give you a break, let me actually

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Speaker 4: get in here and do some shit. Yeah, you know

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Speaker 4: what I mean. So it's interesting.

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Speaker 1: So as Harold your grandfather and Belli your grand.

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Speaker 9: Yeah, my dad was also named Herold also but yeah

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Speaker 9: the original rold All. Uh Mary though, who's blind my grandma?

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Speaker 1: Oh well, I love the history.

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Speaker 3: I can't wait to dig into this food. It looks delicious.

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Speaker 4: Yes, thank you?

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Speaker 8: Uh try and true Uh recipes?

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Speaker 1: What would you say? Is like your top? Like what

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Speaker 1: are the people? What do the people think? Things that

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Speaker 1: people always come.

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Speaker 9: Back for Dumbo fried, cafish, propheciate you say mm, trimple boys?

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Speaker 8: Uh Begnet's and breakfast.

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Speaker 4: I didn't know that.

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Speaker 1: Hym, we're getting the Nye's what fast, bitch?

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Speaker 4: I got smoke a blind in the parking lot to

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Speaker 4: make more room.

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Speaker 1: What is happening?

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Speaker 2: Thank you so so so much. I'm excited to to

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Speaker 2: dig in.

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Speaker 8: Welcome, You're welcome. Happy to have you guys.

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Speaker 4: It was lovely, This food is lovely.

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Speaker 7: I know.

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Speaker 3: I'm so grateful to be in the space, this black owned,

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Speaker 3: family owned landmark space, and here the history is really beautiful.

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Speaker 4: I know.

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Speaker 2: I think we forget like that Black people in America

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Speaker 2: is relatively recently and just remembered to actually like investigate

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Speaker 2: the history of where you are and how you got there,

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Speaker 2: because honestly, it's so divine, you know when I think

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Speaker 2: about just the divine interventions and meetings of just people

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Speaker 2: intersecting and creating ideas and birthing businesses that you know,

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Speaker 2: withstand the test of time, and they're still here and

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Speaker 2: they're still feeding us, like spiritually and physically, but like

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Speaker 2: even with us, you know, and like how we got

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Speaker 2: to California by way of our parents and Ryan and

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Speaker 2: the things that we've created in this place and the

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Speaker 2: memories we've created and how it's shaped us. I think,

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Speaker 2: as black people shout out to February Black History Month,

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Speaker 2: wherever you live, investigate how your people got there and

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Speaker 2: who you are, and like how the migration of honestly,

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Speaker 2: like African chattel slavery has like migrated and impacted the

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Speaker 2: United States so significantly. I've been watching this show on Netflix,

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Speaker 2: Hog High on the Hog.

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Speaker 4: Just so you guys know, I'm a fucking foodie. Like

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Speaker 4: I know, I'm ninety eight pounds, but a.

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Speaker 2: Bitch eats a lot and specifically like soul food. I

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Speaker 2: can cook soul food really well, like I really.

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Speaker 4: Can throw down. So this is like near and dear

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Speaker 4: to my heart.

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Speaker 2: But just how that show really highlights how like African

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Speaker 2: Americans have impacted American cuisines so significantly through the slave

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Speaker 2: you know, that's through slavery, and you know just how

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Speaker 2: we've moved out of that and how we've blossomed because

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Speaker 2: I don't think we really take an account from a

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Speaker 2: day to day basis sometimes just.

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Speaker 4: Like oh shit, my grandmother or my great grandmother.

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Speaker 2: Just had privileges and they really, like I know, we're

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Speaker 2: figuring out ourselves and figuring out adulthood, but imagine imagine

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Speaker 2: figuring out adulthood and the guys of the Jim Crow

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Speaker 2: or like right after slavery when you haven't been able

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Speaker 2: had access to education and to all these things, you know,

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Speaker 2: and you just pack your shit up and say we're

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Speaker 2: going to California because I heard there's some jobs. Like

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Speaker 2: it'd be a day days long, you know, days and

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Speaker 2: days travel. You've not really just maybe got a car.

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Speaker 2: You know, you may get harassed in between. You can't

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Speaker 2: stay at every hotel. You probably have kids in tow

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Speaker 2: and the fear and then you show up in a

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Speaker 2: new place and you have to like soil, you.

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Speaker 4: Know, like you have to like make roots.

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Speaker 2: And the beautiful things that we've gotten from the strength

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Speaker 2: and the diligence of our ancestors is some real shit.

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Speaker 2: And I think when we can like hone in on

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Speaker 2: that information and investigate that history, it kind of reminds you,

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Speaker 2: like why the fuck you're here and how important like

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Speaker 2: your purpose is and whatever it is you do and

306
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Speaker 2: however you contribute, and like Ryan's family started a little

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Speaker 2: jup joint so they could like hang out and chill

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Speaker 2: and kick it, and it's still here, you know, serving us.

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Speaker 2: So I think it's important, you know, especially in this month,

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Speaker 2: especially all year, just to be curious about all the

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Speaker 2: things and like how you ended up where you're at,

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Speaker 2: and like imagine your daddy stayed in Texas, Like but

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Speaker 2: if you were a Texas.

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Speaker 4: Baby, who the fuck would you be?

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Speaker 2: Or if I was a Philly baby that stayed in Philly,

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Speaker 2: you know, right.

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Speaker 3: It Also as you're as you were talking, it was

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Speaker 3: I was thinking about just the grace that we need

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Speaker 3: to extend sometimes to our grandparents, to even our parents,

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Speaker 3: because they are you know, the result of their parenting

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Speaker 3: and and what those not having the opportunity to work

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Speaker 3: on yourself because you're just trying to survive, and how

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Speaker 3: that manifests in how they've parented your parents or how

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Speaker 3: they parented your grandparents, and how that trickles down and

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Speaker 3: then we say, like why.

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Speaker 1: The fuck would you treat me this way? How could

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Speaker 1: you do this?

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Speaker 3: And it's like we're not really taking into consideration the

329
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Speaker 3: full scope of the trauma of being black in America.

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Speaker 2: It's true, and like the beauty of it is like

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Speaker 2: there's two sides to every point, right, Like there is

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Speaker 2: significant trauma and there is like this this place where

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Speaker 2: it's like I'm surviving and I'm trying to figure it out,

334
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Speaker 2: and I'm trying to make away from my family and

335
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Speaker 2: I'm trying to you know, stay safe and stay alive

336
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Speaker 2: in a place where everybody really is trying to kill

337
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Speaker 2: me and make me like make me less than and

338
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Speaker 2: you know how that trauma builds on and how that

339
00:16:46,480 --> 00:16:49,560
Speaker 2: contributes to your parenting. I was watching a video yesterday

340
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Speaker 2: about like a football player like basically reading a letter

341
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Speaker 2: to his parents, you know, just like how he was

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Speaker 2: yelled at in the morning before school and like how

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Speaker 2: he's changing that and his you know, with his kids,

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00:17:02,040 --> 00:17:03,920
Speaker 2: and so it's true, like the grace you have to

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00:17:03,920 --> 00:17:07,480
Speaker 2: give is like imagine the anger, Imagine the fear, Imagine

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Speaker 2: the frustration and the rage living and existing like I can.

347
00:17:11,640 --> 00:17:14,040
Speaker 2: I don't even watch certain movies because I'm too emotional,

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Speaker 2: like about a certain period of time unless I'm really

349
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Speaker 2: mentally prepared for it. So imagine living in it and

350
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Speaker 2: then still having to be kind to your kids and

351
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Speaker 2: compassionate and soft and being scared but still having to

352
00:17:27,760 --> 00:17:31,160
Speaker 2: be brave and being scared, but still moving into neighborhoods

353
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Speaker 2: where people were literally trying to harass you and getting

354
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Speaker 2: away with it.

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Speaker 4: And also like thinking about.

356
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Speaker 2: Ryan and his great grandparents making this place for play, right,

357
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Speaker 2: you know, still making a place to like we're gonna

358
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Speaker 2: have our place, but inside these walls it's and we're

359
00:17:50,400 --> 00:17:53,000
Speaker 2: gonna we're gonna commune and we're gonna drink and we're

360
00:17:53,000 --> 00:17:56,720
Speaker 2: gonna dance, and we're gonna celebrate life despite all the bullshit,

361
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Speaker 2: you know, despite the journey here, and that's really beautiful too,

362
00:18:00,720 --> 00:18:02,919
Speaker 2: and even like thinking about this place starting here, you know,

363
00:18:02,960 --> 00:18:08,240
Speaker 2: this new, this this Los Angeles establishing this place this

364
00:18:08,440 --> 00:18:11,960
Speaker 2: side of town as New Orleans Quarters or whatever, like

365
00:18:12,240 --> 00:18:15,879
Speaker 2: from here to the church, how deeply spirituality has served

366
00:18:15,880 --> 00:18:19,359
Speaker 2: in our community and specifically New Orleans is like a

367
00:18:19,359 --> 00:18:23,520
Speaker 2: witchy but Catholic place, and you know, the the intersection

368
00:18:23,800 --> 00:18:27,120
Speaker 2: of religion and spiritual spiritualism and how like I think

369
00:18:27,160 --> 00:18:30,560
Speaker 2: it's coming back. Whereas before it was really scary, everything

370
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Speaker 2: witchy or everything was very separate.

371
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Speaker 1: There was no there wasn't we weren't allowed to intersect

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Speaker 1: those two things.

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Speaker 2: Well because well but I think that's a part of

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Speaker 2: the scheme, the gimmick, right because inevitably, as a Black American,

375
00:18:43,760 --> 00:18:47,480
Speaker 2: you have your African culture and religion that is probably

376
00:18:48,200 --> 00:18:52,240
Speaker 2: what we now call label witchy or magic. And then

377
00:18:52,280 --> 00:18:55,399
Speaker 2: we have this the we have this rigid form of

378
00:18:55,480 --> 00:18:58,160
Speaker 2: Christianity which was you know, nine times out of ten

379
00:18:58,280 --> 00:19:01,240
Speaker 2: provided to you by your slave owners. And then we've

380
00:19:01,320 --> 00:19:04,560
Speaker 2: meshed it and we've covered it in those things, and

381
00:19:04,640 --> 00:19:06,919
Speaker 2: like just to recoming back to that in general, like

382
00:19:06,960 --> 00:19:09,159
Speaker 2: as even us you know, on this journey in the

383
00:19:09,200 --> 00:19:11,320
Speaker 2: last six years, like I don't think I mean, I

384
00:19:11,320 --> 00:19:12,879
Speaker 2: think I've always been a witch, but I don't know

385
00:19:12,880 --> 00:19:15,880
Speaker 2: if I was like out loud self proclaiming that I'm

386
00:19:15,920 --> 00:19:19,359
Speaker 2: a witch five years ago. You know, but this journey

387
00:19:19,440 --> 00:19:24,159
Speaker 2: has kind of an unheedled like this part of me,

388
00:19:24,840 --> 00:19:27,240
Speaker 2: and I think it's just a return to our roots.

389
00:19:27,800 --> 00:19:28,040
Speaker 1: You know.

390
00:19:28,160 --> 00:19:29,840
Speaker 4: It's like I'm not scared of that, Like this is

391
00:19:29,880 --> 00:19:30,600
Speaker 4: actually my shit.

392
00:19:31,359 --> 00:19:34,880
Speaker 2: But I'd like to give a little toast to our

393
00:19:34,960 --> 00:19:38,040
Speaker 2: ancestors and to the journey here and our journey here

394
00:19:38,160 --> 00:19:43,680
Speaker 2: and just the divine, just the divine intervention in our

395
00:19:43,720 --> 00:19:47,280
Speaker 2: lives that if we honor it can really birth beautiful

396
00:19:47,359 --> 00:19:49,160
Speaker 2: things that last a really long time.

397
00:19:51,280 --> 00:19:51,639
Speaker 7: It is.

398
00:19:55,280 --> 00:19:58,800
Speaker 4: So speaking of witchy shit, it's.

399
00:19:58,680 --> 00:20:05,280
Speaker 2: Terole time where because we travel with our Chao cards everywhere. Literally,

400
00:20:05,280 --> 00:20:07,240
Speaker 2: I have my other like may pack in my purse.

401
00:20:08,720 --> 00:20:10,440
Speaker 2: I always say this, but it's also like a party

402
00:20:10,520 --> 00:20:14,160
Speaker 2: Oh okay, it's also it's also like a party trick.

403
00:20:14,359 --> 00:20:16,119
Speaker 4: Like, oh, everybody's poor. Do you want to Oh, I'm Mila.

404
00:20:16,359 --> 00:20:17,679
Speaker 1: You want to know my you want to know my?

405
00:20:17,880 --> 00:20:25,879
Speaker 4: Want to have my purse? Can things like cat crawling

406
00:20:25,920 --> 00:20:32,080
Speaker 4: under the card? I love it? But what better place

407
00:20:32,400 --> 00:20:33,360
Speaker 4: do you want these cards?

408
00:20:33,440 --> 00:20:35,560
Speaker 1: Sure, we'll take those cards. I need to be in

409
00:20:35,600 --> 00:20:35,880
Speaker 1: the tack.

410
00:20:36,080 --> 00:20:39,320
Speaker 4: Usually when they usually when they fall out.

411
00:20:39,359 --> 00:20:39,919
Speaker 1: I know I use them.

412
00:20:39,920 --> 00:20:43,000
Speaker 3: We're gonna use off for all five of those cars.

413
00:20:43,080 --> 00:20:44,840
Speaker 10: Those are the cards, and then I'm let you choose

414
00:20:44,840 --> 00:20:58,760
Speaker 10: one of the fun Okay, okay, hmm, I know it.

415
00:20:59,200 --> 00:20:59,960
Speaker 4: Why'd you know it?

416
00:21:00,119 --> 00:21:00,639
Speaker 1: I'll just knew it.

417
00:21:02,160 --> 00:21:05,439
Speaker 4: There's a eight of sorts, okay, eight of sorts?

418
00:21:06,760 --> 00:21:09,000
Speaker 1: I don't I've pulled this one a few different times.

419
00:21:09,680 --> 00:21:10,399
Speaker 4: This is the season.

420
00:21:11,359 --> 00:21:13,080
Speaker 3: Well, I saw it when it fell and then I

421
00:21:13,160 --> 00:21:14,639
Speaker 3: when you when you laid them out, I was like,

422
00:21:14,680 --> 00:21:15,280
Speaker 3: I'm gonna.

423
00:21:15,080 --> 00:21:18,520
Speaker 1: Get that one. Okay that doesn't know No, No, it's

424
00:21:18,520 --> 00:21:18,960
Speaker 1: a good one.

425
00:21:19,040 --> 00:21:19,560
Speaker 4: It's not bad.

426
00:21:19,640 --> 00:21:23,000
Speaker 1: Okay. So you see the eight of Sorts shout out

427
00:21:23,040 --> 00:21:24,120
Speaker 1: to mahogany Taro.

428
00:21:26,080 --> 00:21:29,040
Speaker 3: And if I remember correctly and we can flee, should

429
00:21:29,040 --> 00:21:32,199
Speaker 3: pull up BDDY because I don't remember everything. But in

430
00:21:32,240 --> 00:21:35,360
Speaker 3: the Eight of Swords, there's a woman that's h bound

431
00:21:36,240 --> 00:21:39,119
Speaker 3: and then there's this beautiful castle behind her, and she

432
00:21:39,160 --> 00:21:41,000
Speaker 3: feels like she doesn't have any options. But all she

433
00:21:41,040 --> 00:21:44,439
Speaker 3: has to do is untie herself and turn around and

434
00:21:44,480 --> 00:21:47,119
Speaker 3: she could be free, but she feels like she's stuck

435
00:21:47,119 --> 00:21:49,359
Speaker 3: in the confines of whatever situation she's in, and she

436
00:21:49,400 --> 00:21:52,440
Speaker 3: feels like she's stuck. But really it's it's a mind shift,

437
00:21:52,680 --> 00:21:55,399
Speaker 3: and it's really about shifting your mindset and knowing that

438
00:21:55,440 --> 00:21:56,240
Speaker 3: you have options.

439
00:21:58,560 --> 00:22:01,080
Speaker 4: Yeah, let me read no, Yeah, that's what it says.

440
00:22:01,200 --> 00:22:06,679
Speaker 2: It says negative thoughts, self imposed restriction, imprisonment, victim, mentality.

441
00:22:08,080 --> 00:22:13,159
Speaker 2: The aid of Swords reveals that you feel trapped and restricted.

442
00:22:12,600 --> 00:22:13,760
Speaker 4: By your circumstances.

443
00:22:14,000 --> 00:22:16,359
Speaker 2: Hmm, it's interesting that we were just talking about the

444
00:22:16,400 --> 00:22:20,439
Speaker 2: circumstances of growing up black in America. You believe your

445
00:22:20,440 --> 00:22:23,280
Speaker 2: options are limited with no clear path out. You might

446
00:22:23,320 --> 00:22:26,960
Speaker 2: be in an unfulfilling job, an abusive relationship, a significant

447
00:22:26,960 --> 00:22:29,520
Speaker 2: amount of debt, or a situation way out of alignment

448
00:22:29,560 --> 00:22:32,359
Speaker 2: with your inner being. You are now trapped between a

449
00:22:32,440 --> 00:22:35,959
Speaker 2: rock and a hard place with no resolution available. However,

450
00:22:36,200 --> 00:22:38,040
Speaker 2: take note, but the woman in the card is not

451
00:22:38,200 --> 00:22:40,919
Speaker 2: entirely imprisoned by the aid of Swords around her, and

452
00:22:40,960 --> 00:22:42,720
Speaker 2: if she wanted to escape, she could.

453
00:22:43,160 --> 00:22:44,640
Speaker 4: She merely needs to move.

454
00:22:44,520 --> 00:22:48,359
Speaker 2: That blindfold and free herself from the self imposed bindings

455
00:22:48,400 --> 00:22:51,080
Speaker 2: that hold her back. When the aid of Swords appears

456
00:22:51,119 --> 00:22:53,280
Speaker 2: in Tara reading, it comes as a warning that your

457
00:22:53,320 --> 00:22:56,600
Speaker 2: thoughts and beliefs are no longer serving you. You may

458
00:22:56,760 --> 00:23:00,480
Speaker 2: be overthinking things, creating negative patterns, or limiting yourself only

459
00:23:00,520 --> 00:23:03,480
Speaker 2: considering the worst case scenario. The more you think about

460
00:23:03,480 --> 00:23:06,000
Speaker 2: the situation, the more you feel stuck and without any options.

461
00:23:06,400 --> 00:23:08,159
Speaker 2: It is time to get out of your head and

462
00:23:08,280 --> 00:23:10,960
Speaker 2: let go of those thoughts and beliefs holding you back.

463
00:23:11,560 --> 00:23:13,840
Speaker 4: As you change your thoughts, you change your reality.

464
00:23:14,840 --> 00:23:18,639
Speaker 3: HM that's received and resonate with that.

465
00:23:19,640 --> 00:23:24,680
Speaker 2: It feels sometimes like you can't get out of fucking situations,

466
00:23:24,720 --> 00:23:26,080
Speaker 2: but it is, It is always.

467
00:23:26,160 --> 00:23:27,720
Speaker 4: There is always a brighter side.

468
00:23:27,840 --> 00:23:30,840
Speaker 2: And like the things that we are usually battling with

469
00:23:30,920 --> 00:23:33,840
Speaker 2: or that are like suffocating us, are generally.

470
00:23:35,200 --> 00:23:36,040
Speaker 4: Not that serious.

471
00:23:36,480 --> 00:23:38,600
Speaker 3: Yes, but you have to make a choice though, and

472
00:23:38,640 --> 00:23:42,240
Speaker 3: you act. You have to actively change or work on

473
00:23:42,359 --> 00:23:44,480
Speaker 3: changing your mind. And that's and that's really uncomfortable. And

474
00:23:44,480 --> 00:23:46,000
Speaker 3: I think that's why a lot of people get stuck

475
00:23:46,520 --> 00:23:49,320
Speaker 3: in whatever mind state or whatever state of mind that

476
00:23:49,320 --> 00:23:54,320
Speaker 3: they're in, because it requires you to actually move against

477
00:23:54,400 --> 00:23:58,439
Speaker 3: whatever limiting belief system that's been serving you for however

478
00:23:58,520 --> 00:24:01,080
Speaker 3: long or not serving you. But it requires you to

479
00:24:01,119 --> 00:24:03,560
Speaker 3: get uncomfortable, and I think that's often the hardest part,

480
00:24:03,600 --> 00:24:05,639
Speaker 3: and that's why people don't That's why people get stuck

481
00:24:05,640 --> 00:24:09,160
Speaker 3: and that's why people who continue to I guess, suffer

482
00:24:09,520 --> 00:24:13,199
Speaker 3: essentially because there's a short term suffering that has to

483
00:24:13,240 --> 00:24:15,480
Speaker 3: occur in order for the mind shift to happen, and

484
00:24:15,480 --> 00:24:16,560
Speaker 3: people aren't willing to just.

485
00:24:16,560 --> 00:24:17,080
Speaker 4: Get out of it.

486
00:24:17,200 --> 00:24:19,439
Speaker 3: Yeah, well, people aren't willing to get uncomfortable and for

487
00:24:19,520 --> 00:24:22,240
Speaker 3: it to hurt a little bit. We're such in a

488
00:24:22,280 --> 00:24:25,520
Speaker 3: society that we're always like numbing ourselves down with all

489
00:24:25,520 --> 00:24:30,439
Speaker 3: different types of things, whether it's drugs, alcohol, television, distraction relationships.

490
00:24:30,680 --> 00:24:35,280
Speaker 3: There's a numbing that we've become accustomed to where that's

491
00:24:35,359 --> 00:24:38,640
Speaker 3: the easier thing. We'd rather do that than actually rip

492
00:24:38,680 --> 00:24:41,159
Speaker 3: off the band aid and get really uncomfortable for a

493
00:24:41,200 --> 00:24:43,160
Speaker 3: few months. And that's what I was telling my friend

494
00:24:43,160 --> 00:24:45,959
Speaker 3: that the other day. I was like, you can just like,

495
00:24:46,280 --> 00:24:48,640
Speaker 3: if you could just commit to be uncomfortable for six months,

496
00:24:48,640 --> 00:24:52,040
Speaker 3: it could totally change your fucking life, just to commit

497
00:24:52,119 --> 00:24:55,080
Speaker 3: to being uncomfortable for six months out of the long

498
00:24:55,160 --> 00:24:57,119
Speaker 3: ass life that you were about to live and just

499
00:24:57,119 --> 00:24:58,040
Speaker 3: see what happens.

500
00:24:58,520 --> 00:24:59,360
Speaker 4: The thing about.

501
00:24:59,200 --> 00:25:03,200
Speaker 2: Numbing yourself is that we live in a society that

502
00:25:03,200 --> 00:25:06,680
Speaker 2: that is the programming you have to actively fight out

503
00:25:06,680 --> 00:25:09,919
Speaker 2: of not only the numbing, but the misery, like making

504
00:25:09,960 --> 00:25:11,840
Speaker 2: the misery a part of your story, you know what

505
00:25:11,880 --> 00:25:16,240
Speaker 2: I mean, Like we actively live your default inner voice

506
00:25:16,320 --> 00:25:19,080
Speaker 2: is probably negative unless you actively.

507
00:25:18,640 --> 00:25:22,040
Speaker 4: Work out of it. Because everything in our programming, everything.

508
00:25:21,720 --> 00:25:23,280
Speaker 2: In our environment is going to tell you you're not

509
00:25:23,280 --> 00:25:26,199
Speaker 2: good enough, you're not beautiful enough. It's too difficult, it's

510
00:25:26,280 --> 00:25:29,359
Speaker 2: too far fetch, it's not possible. Because that's kind of

511
00:25:29,359 --> 00:25:31,840
Speaker 2: how they want you to feel. Because if everybody knew

512
00:25:31,880 --> 00:25:35,639
Speaker 2: that they were magic, then we'd all be doing everything

513
00:25:35,680 --> 00:25:39,119
Speaker 2: we need and that would really benefit the powers that be.

514
00:25:39,840 --> 00:25:43,560
Speaker 2: And so I think that, like sometimes the numbing starts

515
00:25:43,600 --> 00:25:46,159
Speaker 2: early because think about it. As a child, you're just

516
00:25:46,240 --> 00:25:52,720
Speaker 2: like this big you know, like you go, our kids

517
00:25:52,720 --> 00:25:55,280
Speaker 2: will fucking play out a whole imaginary scene right here

518
00:25:55,280 --> 00:25:56,760
Speaker 2: and don't give a fuck who's in here.

519
00:25:57,000 --> 00:25:58,760
Speaker 4: But are we going to do that? Probably not?

520
00:25:58,880 --> 00:26:07,440
Speaker 2: I mean yeah, yeah, but most people don't have that

521
00:26:09,080 --> 00:26:13,159
Speaker 2: bravery to do that. And it's it's this revolving door

522
00:26:13,240 --> 00:26:19,880
Speaker 2: of pain and Buddhism they say, like conflict is conflict

523
00:26:19,920 --> 00:26:22,440
Speaker 2: is expected, Suffering is optional.

524
00:26:24,040 --> 00:26:25,120
Speaker 4: Suffering is optional.

525
00:26:25,720 --> 00:26:29,439
Speaker 2: We're going to feel whatever the emotion is that is

526
00:26:29,480 --> 00:26:34,879
Speaker 2: behind whatever obstacle, but for how long and just generally

527
00:26:36,000 --> 00:26:38,800
Speaker 2: listen to the way you think and pay attention to

528
00:26:38,840 --> 00:26:41,360
Speaker 2: how you feel, because that's where the numbing comes in, right,

529
00:26:41,480 --> 00:26:43,200
Speaker 2: because if you don't pay attention to how you feel,

530
00:26:43,200 --> 00:26:43,880
Speaker 2: then you're just numb.

531
00:26:44,320 --> 00:26:47,120
Speaker 3: And also taking into account, like if we're talking about too,

532
00:26:47,240 --> 00:26:49,280
Speaker 3: just like the history of our people and like the

533
00:26:49,359 --> 00:26:53,640
Speaker 3: numbing that we've had to we've had to, we've had

534
00:26:53,680 --> 00:26:57,480
Speaker 3: to enact in order to survive, and then like trying

535
00:26:57,480 --> 00:26:59,040
Speaker 3: to unnumb those.

536
00:26:58,880 --> 00:27:00,040
Speaker 1: Parts of you.

537
00:27:00,040 --> 00:27:02,440
Speaker 3: You don't even know our numb because you've never even

538
00:27:02,480 --> 00:27:04,760
Speaker 3: known what it is to feel in that space anymore.

539
00:27:05,200 --> 00:27:07,280
Speaker 3: And I think like the beginning of that is really

540
00:27:07,320 --> 00:27:10,920
Speaker 3: looking at your parents and seeing where are you numbed out?

541
00:27:11,240 --> 00:27:13,560
Speaker 1: Because nine times out of ten, that's also where you are?

542
00:27:13,880 --> 00:27:16,520
Speaker 2: And how have I adopted them?

543
00:27:16,720 --> 00:27:16,920
Speaker 1: Right?

544
00:27:16,960 --> 00:27:19,600
Speaker 2: Because even if you don't fuck with your parents, if

545
00:27:19,600 --> 00:27:23,320
Speaker 2: you were raised with them, you were inevitably adopting.

546
00:27:23,320 --> 00:27:24,000
Speaker 1: That's what I'm saying.

547
00:27:25,280 --> 00:27:27,680
Speaker 3: However, they are numbed out, you need to evaluate if

548
00:27:27,720 --> 00:27:29,840
Speaker 3: that's how you are as well, because nine times out

549
00:27:29,880 --> 00:27:34,359
Speaker 3: of ten, yeah, probably, or sometimes instead of doing that,

550
00:27:34,400 --> 00:27:36,720
Speaker 3: we go the total opposite, right, Like we go the

551
00:27:36,720 --> 00:27:39,960
Speaker 3: total extreme, like our parents totally neglected us, and now

552
00:27:40,080 --> 00:27:43,119
Speaker 3: like as parents, we are helicopter ass parents over our

553
00:27:43,200 --> 00:27:45,119
Speaker 3: children because we were so neglected as children.

554
00:27:45,440 --> 00:27:46,000
Speaker 1: So it's like.

555
00:27:47,560 --> 00:27:51,840
Speaker 3: Investigating and then understanding how this is showing up in

556
00:27:51,880 --> 00:27:55,720
Speaker 3: my life, in my body, in my relationships, and then

557
00:27:56,119 --> 00:27:58,680
Speaker 3: changing it, and then and then being okay and knowing

558
00:27:58,720 --> 00:28:04,280
Speaker 3: that the change reply's time, knowing that it requires patience, practice, practice,

559
00:28:04,320 --> 00:28:04,720
Speaker 3: and pain.

560
00:28:05,200 --> 00:28:05,440
Speaker 1: Pain.

561
00:28:05,840 --> 00:28:07,280
Speaker 4: It's going to be uncomfortable.

562
00:28:07,520 --> 00:28:13,440
Speaker 2: I was telling Erica recently, Luna was like doing something

563
00:28:13,480 --> 00:28:15,200
Speaker 2: and I was like, give me a hug, Come give

564
00:28:15,200 --> 00:28:17,320
Speaker 2: me a hug, and Orlando was like please, and I

565
00:28:17,400 --> 00:28:20,040
Speaker 2: was like, shut the fuck up, Like I've just broke

566
00:28:20,160 --> 00:28:22,639
Speaker 2: this person came out of my pussy, so you need

567
00:28:22,680 --> 00:28:25,480
Speaker 2: to shut the fuck up about when I'm demanding hugs.

568
00:28:26,000 --> 00:28:27,600
Speaker 2: And I had told him that later, like I really

569
00:28:27,600 --> 00:28:29,720
Speaker 2: hate when you do that, because I was like, tantrik speech,

570
00:28:29,760 --> 00:28:31,720
Speaker 2: tantrik speech. I'm like, sometimes you just need to shut

571
00:28:31,720 --> 00:28:34,199
Speaker 2: the fuck up, like don't use me on me. But

572
00:28:34,440 --> 00:28:36,320
Speaker 2: you know, he said to me something that was kind

573
00:28:36,320 --> 00:28:38,920
Speaker 2: of profound, and I was high when he told me,

574
00:28:38,960 --> 00:28:40,760
Speaker 2: so maybe it just made me go even deeper. But

575
00:28:40,880 --> 00:28:44,000
Speaker 2: he was just like, it's not that you know, and

576
00:28:44,040 --> 00:28:45,800
Speaker 2: I'm not trying to interfere, and maybe I shouldn't do

577
00:28:45,840 --> 00:28:47,520
Speaker 2: it in that way, but you don't want her to

578
00:28:47,520 --> 00:28:50,840
Speaker 2: get used to even something that you're requesting and love

579
00:28:51,320 --> 00:28:55,160
Speaker 2: feel hard or feel demanding. And that's the thing with

580
00:28:55,200 --> 00:28:58,880
Speaker 2: tantic speech, like it takes a demand and it makes

581
00:28:58,920 --> 00:29:02,240
Speaker 2: it a request consciously just by being like please, can

582
00:29:02,280 --> 00:29:03,320
Speaker 2: you please panent me?

583
00:29:03,440 --> 00:29:04,000
Speaker 4: Can you thank you?

584
00:29:04,200 --> 00:29:06,160
Speaker 2: Like and I'd like to say I'm the Queen of finesse,

585
00:29:06,440 --> 00:29:08,680
Speaker 2: but with people close to me, we forget, you know,

586
00:29:08,760 --> 00:29:10,560
Speaker 2: like give me that, give me a kiss, do that

587
00:29:10,600 --> 00:29:13,760
Speaker 2: for me. And so it made me really seep deeply

588
00:29:13,800 --> 00:29:17,680
Speaker 2: into that statement, and it made me realize, like I

589
00:29:17,760 --> 00:29:21,200
Speaker 2: generally don't I don't want, I don't like to speak

590
00:29:21,240 --> 00:29:26,200
Speaker 2: this permanency over my who I am. But I don't

591
00:29:26,240 --> 00:29:29,480
Speaker 2: really have the tools sometimes to be soft, because that's

592
00:29:29,480 --> 00:29:30,760
Speaker 2: not how I was spoken to as a.

593
00:29:30,800 --> 00:29:32,040
Speaker 4: Child, you know.

594
00:29:32,160 --> 00:29:34,080
Speaker 2: And so I'm like, yeah, give me a kiss, and

595
00:29:34,160 --> 00:29:36,720
Speaker 2: it is loving, but this is how I'm asking for it,

596
00:29:36,800 --> 00:29:37,040
Speaker 2: you know.

597
00:29:37,240 --> 00:29:38,600
Speaker 4: And like just.

598
00:29:38,760 --> 00:29:42,480
Speaker 2: Being honest with myself about how I speak to Luna,

599
00:29:42,600 --> 00:29:46,320
Speaker 2: even if it's in love, how it feels, what vibration

600
00:29:46,440 --> 00:29:49,600
Speaker 2: it's giving by the words I'm choosing by not saying

601
00:29:49,640 --> 00:29:52,920
Speaker 2: please or thank you because I'm feeling like i'm saying

602
00:29:52,920 --> 00:29:55,760
Speaker 2: something in love. I'm actually asking for what I need,

603
00:29:56,040 --> 00:29:58,920
Speaker 2: but not asking for it kindly, and it creates this

604
00:29:59,000 --> 00:30:03,400
Speaker 2: weird environ around the very thing that is loving. And

605
00:30:03,440 --> 00:30:05,680
Speaker 2: it made me realize like, oh my god, Like this

606
00:30:05,720 --> 00:30:08,600
Speaker 2: is a big issue for me because this is what

607
00:30:08,640 --> 00:30:10,880
Speaker 2: I was exposed to. This is literally the only way

608
00:30:10,920 --> 00:30:13,120
Speaker 2: I know how to express myself. And even for me,

609
00:30:13,200 --> 00:30:14,920
Speaker 2: like asking for dick, I'm like, give me some dick.

610
00:30:17,680 --> 00:30:19,080
Speaker 2: I'm like, Wow, I'm not sexy at all.

611
00:30:19,160 --> 00:30:24,520
Speaker 1: You know, there's no sexy.

612
00:30:25,560 --> 00:30:27,760
Speaker 4: Take that out, but I did.

613
00:30:27,800 --> 00:30:31,080
Speaker 2: It's like it was this moment of clarity and I

614
00:30:31,120 --> 00:30:34,000
Speaker 2: was just like, wow, I have to work on this

615
00:30:34,200 --> 00:30:36,480
Speaker 2: because I don't want that to be the undertone to

616
00:30:36,680 --> 00:30:38,840
Speaker 2: all of my relationships with people that I love.

617
00:30:39,680 --> 00:30:42,000
Speaker 4: And that can very much be the case, but it's true.

618
00:30:42,000 --> 00:30:45,600
Speaker 2: I mean, investigate and examine the places our parents came from,

619
00:30:45,760 --> 00:30:47,360
Speaker 2: even us what we do right now.

620
00:30:47,600 --> 00:30:50,480
Speaker 4: Our parents are like what the fuck are you doing?

621
00:30:51,160 --> 00:30:53,240
Speaker 4: You know, like, and I'm like this is important.

622
00:30:53,280 --> 00:30:56,640
Speaker 2: They're like, you know, you, whatever the fuck it is

623
00:30:56,680 --> 00:30:57,800
Speaker 2: you guys, you're doing over there on.

624
00:30:57,800 --> 00:31:02,840
Speaker 4: Stage, barely clothes, cucumbers in people's mouths, with them on

625
00:31:02,960 --> 00:31:03,600
Speaker 4: all floors.

626
00:31:03,640 --> 00:31:05,840
Speaker 2: I don't get it, and I can see how they

627
00:31:05,840 --> 00:31:09,920
Speaker 2: can be misconstrued when you come from an environment that

628
00:31:09,960 --> 00:31:12,560
Speaker 2: you have not where you've had to survive and you've

629
00:31:12,560 --> 00:31:16,280
Speaker 2: had to protect yourself and you've had to be weary

630
00:31:16,320 --> 00:31:16,880
Speaker 2: of people.

631
00:31:17,680 --> 00:31:20,800
Speaker 1: So it's so funny, yes, because I feel like.

632
00:31:22,560 --> 00:31:25,520
Speaker 3: Our parents have a hard time, and not even just

633
00:31:26,040 --> 00:31:29,120
Speaker 3: our parents, parents in general sometimes have a hard time

634
00:31:29,160 --> 00:31:33,560
Speaker 3: witnessing their children in play as adults, you know, because

635
00:31:33,600 --> 00:31:37,080
Speaker 3: they didn't get to experience that type of play. And however,

636
00:31:37,160 --> 00:31:39,640
Speaker 3: they've worked hard because they wanted to provide a life

637
00:31:39,640 --> 00:31:42,800
Speaker 3: for their children could experience something different, right, And then

638
00:31:42,840 --> 00:31:46,600
Speaker 3: they are experiencing it, but it's not maybe not exactly

639
00:31:46,680 --> 00:31:48,640
Speaker 3: how they expected them to experience it.

640
00:31:49,000 --> 00:31:51,360
Speaker 1: And then they're like, what are you doing? Why are

641
00:31:51,360 --> 00:31:51,760
Speaker 1: you doing that?

642
00:31:52,040 --> 00:31:53,440
Speaker 3: And this is a conversation I've had to have with

643
00:31:53,440 --> 00:31:55,680
Speaker 3: my moms too, because there was a time where I

644
00:31:55,720 --> 00:32:00,520
Speaker 3: was traveling a lot and for leisure and she had

645
00:32:00,520 --> 00:32:02,920
Speaker 3: a problem with it, and I was just like, is

646
00:32:02,920 --> 00:32:05,680
Speaker 3: it this why you've worked so hard so that I

647
00:32:05,800 --> 00:32:08,800
Speaker 3: you always complained that your youth well, she traveled a

648
00:32:08,800 --> 00:32:11,440
Speaker 3: lot before she had me, and then her life.

649
00:32:11,280 --> 00:32:11,960
Speaker 1: Kind of went to shit.

650
00:32:13,240 --> 00:32:17,200
Speaker 3: I did it, But my mom was pretty living a

651
00:32:17,240 --> 00:32:20,360
Speaker 3: real good life before me. She was dating like cheeks

652
00:32:20,360 --> 00:32:22,320
Speaker 3: and shit and princes and she needs.

653
00:32:22,120 --> 00:32:23,360
Speaker 1: To write her own book about all that.

654
00:32:23,520 --> 00:32:25,400
Speaker 3: And then she met a football player and he fucking

655
00:32:25,520 --> 00:32:28,520
Speaker 3: downgradr downgraded her from her Saudi raping lifestyle.

656
00:32:28,800 --> 00:32:29,720
Speaker 4: The athletes, guys.

657
00:32:32,720 --> 00:32:36,760
Speaker 3: But you know, when she had me, like, she sacrificed

658
00:32:36,840 --> 00:32:39,440
Speaker 3: a lot. She didn't get to enjoy herself. She didn't

659
00:32:39,440 --> 00:32:42,560
Speaker 3: get to travel for leisure. And she's worked incredibly hard

660
00:32:42,560 --> 00:32:45,560
Speaker 3: to build a lifestyle for her family and her children

661
00:32:45,960 --> 00:32:48,040
Speaker 3: so that they don't have to do that, you know.

662
00:32:48,160 --> 00:32:49,680
Speaker 3: And so I had to remind her of that. I

663
00:32:49,720 --> 00:32:52,600
Speaker 3: was like, first of all, Mom, this is my money.

664
00:32:52,800 --> 00:32:55,719
Speaker 3: Second of all, Mom, didn't you work really hard so

665
00:32:55,760 --> 00:32:58,320
Speaker 3: that we could experience and not have to suffer and

666
00:32:58,360 --> 00:33:01,120
Speaker 3: not have to stay put because we have to do

667
00:33:01,480 --> 00:33:03,760
Speaker 3: because we have to put our heads down and work hard.

668
00:33:03,800 --> 00:33:06,400
Speaker 3: And granted, I'm gonna do that anyway. I'm doing that anyway.

669
00:33:06,440 --> 00:33:08,600
Speaker 3: I'm of you. I'm a hard ass working bitch because

670
00:33:08,640 --> 00:33:11,160
Speaker 3: of you. But I had to remind her of that.

671
00:33:11,200 --> 00:33:12,320
Speaker 3: And she didn't even know what to say to me.

672
00:33:12,400 --> 00:33:14,560
Speaker 3: She was just like and I was like.

673
00:33:14,520 --> 00:33:16,600
Speaker 4: Got me there be med.

674
00:33:17,520 --> 00:33:20,640
Speaker 3: And it's funny because I the more I talk to

675
00:33:21,640 --> 00:33:23,960
Speaker 3: other women and they have the same thing to say

676
00:33:23,960 --> 00:33:26,560
Speaker 3: about their parents as well. There's a judgment around, like

677
00:33:26,960 --> 00:33:30,040
Speaker 3: what type of what you seek as pleasure, what you

678
00:33:30,080 --> 00:33:33,280
Speaker 3: seek as joy, what you seek is fun and the time,

679
00:33:34,000 --> 00:33:37,400
Speaker 3: it's like a time limit to how much energy you

680
00:33:37,440 --> 00:33:40,360
Speaker 3: can put into those things, Like that's a little too much.

681
00:33:40,360 --> 00:33:42,560
Speaker 1: You're going a little too hard with the joy over there.

682
00:33:42,960 --> 00:33:44,880
Speaker 2: Well, the thing is, and I say this all the time,

683
00:33:44,920 --> 00:33:48,840
Speaker 2: and I've said this, it's joy and leisure like ease

684
00:33:49,320 --> 00:33:55,920
Speaker 2: is a foreign concept to black people, to immigrants, to

685
00:33:56,360 --> 00:33:57,440
Speaker 2: children of immigrants.

686
00:33:57,480 --> 00:33:59,760
Speaker 4: It is literally a foreign concept.

687
00:34:00,160 --> 00:34:04,280
Speaker 11: And because we're children of those people, we existed in

688
00:34:04,320 --> 00:34:06,920
Speaker 11: their bodies before we existed in these bodies, and so

689
00:34:07,120 --> 00:34:11,000
Speaker 11: we have inherited those feelings for protection.

690
00:34:11,200 --> 00:34:16,560
Speaker 4: That is biologically, that's how we are made. If something,

691
00:34:16,640 --> 00:34:17,799
Speaker 4: if you have lived in a.

692
00:34:17,760 --> 00:34:21,560
Speaker 2: Life where you would be murdered for too loud play joy,

693
00:34:22,120 --> 00:34:26,120
Speaker 2: and so your kids are born with the instincts to

694
00:34:26,200 --> 00:34:28,680
Speaker 2: know you don't go too hard in play. And so

695
00:34:28,920 --> 00:34:35,280
Speaker 2: I've realized like fighting for safety, fighting to feel safe,

696
00:34:35,320 --> 00:34:38,800
Speaker 2: fighting to regulate my nervous system, fighting.

697
00:34:38,480 --> 00:34:40,560
Speaker 4: To be aware of.

698
00:34:41,920 --> 00:34:44,960
Speaker 2: When the guilt of play comes up, because this is

699
00:34:45,000 --> 00:34:47,480
Speaker 2: how I've been programmed, and how my parents have been programmed,

700
00:34:47,480 --> 00:34:50,160
Speaker 2: and how their parents have been programmed, and that actually

701
00:34:50,440 --> 00:34:58,160
Speaker 2: playing is releasing generational curses. Playing is healing, it's healing generational.

702
00:34:57,560 --> 00:34:59,839
Speaker 4: Wounds, because these are the things that.

703
00:34:59,760 --> 00:35:03,360
Speaker 2: Are ancestors did not get the opportunity to plan and

704
00:35:03,440 --> 00:35:05,439
Speaker 2: play doesn't look like this or like that.

705
00:35:05,520 --> 00:35:07,279
Speaker 4: It looks like how the fuck it looks for you,

706
00:35:07,600 --> 00:35:09,520
Speaker 4: because only you can deem what's fun for you.

707
00:35:10,400 --> 00:35:14,440
Speaker 2: And like even with Orlando, it is so happy all

708
00:35:14,480 --> 00:35:17,440
Speaker 2: the time and has like so much joy and so

709
00:35:17,480 --> 00:35:21,440
Speaker 2: many ideas, and sometimes I'm like working and I'm like,

710
00:35:21,560 --> 00:35:23,640
Speaker 2: shut the fuck up, it's too much right now, Like

711
00:35:23,680 --> 00:35:26,400
Speaker 2: I need to schedule your joy and I need to

712
00:35:26,400 --> 00:35:28,839
Speaker 2: schedule your ideas because I don't have time for your

713
00:35:28,840 --> 00:35:29,560
Speaker 2: ideas right now.

714
00:35:30,360 --> 00:35:32,000
Speaker 4: And I didn't like that one, so now I'm definitely

715
00:35:32,040 --> 00:35:32,560
Speaker 4: can't hear you.

716
00:35:33,040 --> 00:35:36,120
Speaker 2: But it's it's made me work on myself because I'm like,

717
00:35:36,200 --> 00:35:39,439
Speaker 2: I'm showing up as a bitch. And there was times

718
00:35:39,480 --> 00:35:41,040
Speaker 2: as a kid I saw my mom show up, which

719
00:35:41,040 --> 00:35:42,480
Speaker 2: I thought was a bitch, and I was like, what

720
00:35:42,520 --> 00:35:44,799
Speaker 2: the fuck is her problem? And only because I had

721
00:35:44,800 --> 00:35:47,479
Speaker 2: those conscious thoughts, can I apply them now? And even

722
00:35:47,520 --> 00:35:51,040
Speaker 2: in love, like I'm in a very healthy, loving relationship,

723
00:35:51,520 --> 00:35:54,400
Speaker 2: and still like the first year, I was just like

724
00:35:55,280 --> 00:35:58,759
Speaker 2: waiting for him to fuck it up because I don't

725
00:35:58,800 --> 00:36:03,480
Speaker 2: feel safe being I didn't feel normal being normal, like

726
00:36:03,600 --> 00:36:06,000
Speaker 2: we all work to have these normal lives and be

727
00:36:06,040 --> 00:36:07,759
Speaker 2: able to play and be able to travel and have

728
00:36:07,840 --> 00:36:10,160
Speaker 2: kids and do this thing and be in love and

729
00:36:10,239 --> 00:36:12,480
Speaker 2: like be cheesy, and then you get there and you're like,

730
00:36:12,520 --> 00:36:13,319
Speaker 2: something's wrong here.

731
00:36:13,320 --> 00:36:14,200
Speaker 4: It doesn't feel right.

732
00:36:14,320 --> 00:36:17,400
Speaker 2: And I'm investigating this because nigga, you're about to fuck up.

733
00:36:18,080 --> 00:36:20,040
Speaker 4: But no, bitch, this is this is what the white

734
00:36:20,040 --> 00:36:22,120
Speaker 4: people are doing. This is this is the happily ever ever,

735
00:36:22,560 --> 00:36:24,880
Speaker 4: happily ever after. This is what it feels like. And

736
00:36:24,920 --> 00:36:27,879
Speaker 4: I really had to be like, oh, this is what's fun.

737
00:36:30,360 --> 00:36:32,480
Speaker 4: Oh yeah, I don't need to stress out. Masks does

738
00:36:32,520 --> 00:36:37,719
Speaker 4: not come to get me. But you know, and even

739
00:36:37,760 --> 00:36:41,000
Speaker 4: with Luna, like I don't like kid noises, I'm like, bitch,

740
00:36:41,000 --> 00:36:45,000
Speaker 4: you had a kid and you want her to be happy.

741
00:36:45,080 --> 00:36:48,040
Speaker 4: And I'm like, God, this is so noisy your happiness.

742
00:36:48,239 --> 00:36:50,520
Speaker 2: But then sometimes she's in the other room on the FaceTime,

743
00:36:50,680 --> 00:36:54,680
Speaker 2: like an old cackling lady, like what the fuck is

744
00:36:54,680 --> 00:36:58,440
Speaker 2: so funny, and I'm happy to hear her joy, and

745
00:36:58,480 --> 00:36:59,200
Speaker 2: it reminds me.

746
00:36:59,239 --> 00:37:01,279
Speaker 4: It's like, bring back that childlike joy.

747
00:37:01,840 --> 00:37:04,800
Speaker 2: Whatever you're stressed about, whatever adult shit that's so important,

748
00:37:05,200 --> 00:37:08,640
Speaker 2: the fucking email or the fucking mark from fucking on

749
00:37:08,800 --> 00:37:17,600
Speaker 2: brand and not sending your shit on time, It's fine.

750
00:37:15,360 --> 00:37:15,560
Speaker 3: You know.

751
00:37:15,800 --> 00:37:19,879
Speaker 2: It's just like, be present in the moment and enjoy it.

752
00:37:19,920 --> 00:37:24,200
Speaker 2: And I've just realized, like the practice of pleasure is

753
00:37:24,280 --> 00:37:27,360
Speaker 2: so important, and I'm really grateful that we get this

754
00:37:27,440 --> 00:37:30,799
Speaker 2: space and this opportunity to remind ourselves, to remind each

755
00:37:30,800 --> 00:37:34,799
Speaker 2: other to play, and also to just like check ourselves,

756
00:37:34,840 --> 00:37:37,440
Speaker 2: because I really feel like, even if our parents think

757
00:37:37,560 --> 00:37:40,439
Speaker 2: our jobs are stupid, it's important for us to play

758
00:37:40,480 --> 00:37:43,000
Speaker 2: so that our people see us play and remind them

759
00:37:43,200 --> 00:37:45,360
Speaker 2: that you should be in love. You deserve to be

760
00:37:45,400 --> 00:37:47,960
Speaker 2: in these epic romantic loves. You deserve to have fun,

761
00:37:48,000 --> 00:37:49,280
Speaker 2: You deserve to cart wheel.

762
00:37:49,239 --> 00:37:51,719
Speaker 4: You deserve to dance with your titties. App without no

763
00:37:51,800 --> 00:37:54,480
Speaker 4: nigga's opinions because you're you've.

764
00:37:54,160 --> 00:37:58,560
Speaker 2: Worked for this, being born and being existing as black

765
00:37:58,600 --> 00:38:02,520
Speaker 2: and brown people, existing in this form today right now

766
00:38:03,120 --> 00:38:08,560
Speaker 2: is enough to be feel liberated and at ease and

767
00:38:08,560 --> 00:38:14,319
Speaker 2: whatever play you choose, because sexually, platonically, whatever it is,

768
00:38:14,360 --> 00:38:20,279
Speaker 2: because these are the dreams of our ancestors. It was

769
00:38:20,360 --> 00:38:21,680
Speaker 2: my Mela rant for the day.

770
00:38:21,880 --> 00:38:28,040
Speaker 1: Amen, speaking of pleasure, Is it time to smoke a blood?

771
00:38:28,320 --> 00:38:29,120
Speaker 1: Is it smoke?

772
00:38:29,200 --> 00:38:29,759
Speaker 4: Breakup time?

773
00:38:30,520 --> 00:38:32,080
Speaker 1: A lot of time, smoke a lot of time.

774
00:38:32,400 --> 00:38:34,560
Speaker 4: But we have more food coming, so it's definitely. You know,

775
00:38:34,600 --> 00:38:36,239
Speaker 4: nigga's got a smokeing eat.

776
00:38:36,160 --> 00:38:37,160
Speaker 1: So that I could open up.

777
00:38:38,800 --> 00:38:42,080
Speaker 4: A nigga diet. Niggas would be like smoke a blamp

778
00:38:42,120 --> 00:38:42,879
Speaker 4: before you eat more.

779
00:38:43,120 --> 00:38:43,279
Speaker 1: Yeah.

780
00:38:43,280 --> 00:38:45,560
Speaker 4: Absolutely, And we got meals and we got.

781
00:38:45,760 --> 00:38:48,560
Speaker 1: Got more ship coming, So I think it's time for smoking. Clock.

782
00:38:59,360 --> 00:39:01,640
Speaker 3: I hope you let up with us and smoked a good,

783
00:39:01,760 --> 00:39:03,880
Speaker 3: nice blunt with us during our smoke break.

784
00:39:04,520 --> 00:39:06,560
Speaker 1: If not, what the are you doing?

785
00:39:07,000 --> 00:39:09,040
Speaker 4: I love the afternoon smoke break, dear.

786
00:39:12,680 --> 00:39:18,600
Speaker 3: So in the spirit of our talk, today's affirmation is

787
00:39:20,080 --> 00:39:23,240
Speaker 3: fuck the fear, do it for your ancestors.

788
00:39:23,960 --> 00:39:27,520
Speaker 4: Fuck the fear, do it for your ancestors. So I

789
00:39:27,520 --> 00:39:29,480
Speaker 4: guess that's not like a song. Fluck the feet do

790
00:39:29,600 --> 00:39:30,440
Speaker 4: it for your ancest.

791
00:39:30,520 --> 00:39:32,280
Speaker 1: Fuck the feet do it for your answers.

792
00:39:32,680 --> 00:39:34,920
Speaker 4: The feet do it for your ancest. Fuck the feet

793
00:39:35,160 --> 00:39:38,719
Speaker 4: do it for your ass back back like I wanted.

794
00:39:38,480 --> 00:39:39,000
Speaker 1: To bend over.

795
00:39:39,160 --> 00:39:40,880
Speaker 4: I'm like, God, I got them. I got the private

796
00:39:40,920 --> 00:39:41,520
Speaker 4: section for.

797
00:39:41,560 --> 00:39:44,320
Speaker 1: You, so I mean I could. I got the way ready.

798
00:39:44,920 --> 00:39:47,200
Speaker 4: This is a remix. Fuck the feet do it for

799
00:39:47,280 --> 00:39:49,560
Speaker 4: your ass. Fuck the feet do it for you. This

800
00:39:49,600 --> 00:39:52,480
Speaker 4: is like what's the girl from the name and the one?

801
00:39:55,160 --> 00:39:56,959
Speaker 1: Wait? What's your name? Big?

802
00:39:56,960 --> 00:39:59,879
Speaker 4: Fuck the fee do it for your ans is fun?

803
00:40:00,640 --> 00:40:07,520
Speaker 4: Do it for your answer? Yeah, we need to call her. Hey,

804
00:40:07,680 --> 00:40:11,160
Speaker 4: Big Freeda go we gotta sound. We could feel it

805
00:40:11,239 --> 00:40:14,640
Speaker 4: right here. We can feel it right here in New Orleans, LA.

806
00:40:16,000 --> 00:40:17,879
Speaker 2: Whoever knows Big Freda, tell her to call us because

807
00:40:17,880 --> 00:40:19,160
Speaker 2: we got to motherfucking hit.

808
00:40:19,320 --> 00:40:21,760
Speaker 1: I know nobody asked for that, but you're welcome.

809
00:40:22,239 --> 00:40:27,120
Speaker 4: Doesn't matter, doesn't matter, you get it anyway. Everyone just listening.

810
00:40:27,360 --> 00:40:30,960
Speaker 2: You need to tune into YouTube because Erica just backs

811
00:40:31,000 --> 00:40:33,600
Speaker 2: it up in a tight velvet dress in the in

812
00:40:33,640 --> 00:40:34,520
Speaker 2: the middle of the restaurant.

813
00:40:35,160 --> 00:40:39,319
Speaker 4: Totally necessary. I like that one. I fear do it

814
00:40:39,320 --> 00:40:43,719
Speaker 4: for your ancestors. Every time you question yourself, question should you?

815
00:40:44,120 --> 00:40:44,640
Speaker 1: Could you?

816
00:40:44,880 --> 00:40:48,160
Speaker 4: Is it too much? Nothing's too much, Honya.

817
00:40:48,440 --> 00:40:50,799
Speaker 3: Just imagine your ancestors wishing they could do half the

818
00:40:50,800 --> 00:40:54,600
Speaker 3: ship that you're doing right the fuck now, literally just

819
00:40:54,719 --> 00:40:57,920
Speaker 3: walking down the street in freedom.

820
00:40:57,040 --> 00:41:00,000
Speaker 2: Without the gaze of white folks. Sorry, I watched it

821
00:41:00,120 --> 00:41:02,160
Speaker 2: a segregation movie recently, going.

822
00:41:01,920 --> 00:41:05,200
Speaker 3: To the bathroom in fucking peace.

823
00:41:05,960 --> 00:41:09,160
Speaker 1: Yeah, I watched good God's so funny. My daughter is

824
00:41:09,560 --> 00:41:12,319
Speaker 1: she's learning about she learns about I'm okay every year.

825
00:41:12,680 --> 00:41:15,239
Speaker 3: But she asked me at the end of the day,

826
00:41:15,360 --> 00:41:17,520
Speaker 3: She's like, Mommy, do you know who Rosa Parks is?

827
00:41:17,840 --> 00:41:19,520
Speaker 1: And I was like, of course, I had Rosa parts is.

828
00:41:19,560 --> 00:41:21,279
Speaker 1: And she's like, is she alive? I was like, no,

829
00:41:21,320 --> 00:41:22,400
Speaker 1: she was, She's not alive.

830
00:41:22,640 --> 00:41:24,759
Speaker 3: And then I thought to myself, this is a very

831
00:41:25,760 --> 00:41:28,520
Speaker 3: crucial learning moment that I can enact on her and

832
00:41:28,560 --> 00:41:29,080
Speaker 3: not be for the.

833
00:41:29,080 --> 00:41:29,880
Speaker 1: Reasons you think.

834
00:41:30,400 --> 00:41:33,600
Speaker 3: Because my daughter is a rule follower, right, Like she's

835
00:41:33,840 --> 00:41:35,440
Speaker 3: a stickler of a following, this is a.

836
00:41:35,480 --> 00:41:37,640
Speaker 4: Time to tell her if not, yeah, she is.

837
00:41:37,560 --> 00:41:42,000
Speaker 1: A stickler for followers. I was like, so, honey, like

838
00:41:42,040 --> 00:41:43,960
Speaker 1: you've been learning about Rosa Parks. I'm like, so what

839
00:41:44,000 --> 00:41:46,960
Speaker 1: did she do? She was like, she sat somewhere she

840
00:41:47,000 --> 00:41:49,480
Speaker 1: wasn't supposed to sit. And I was like, and what happened?

841
00:41:50,080 --> 00:41:54,200
Speaker 1: She was like things changed for us.

842
00:41:54,320 --> 00:41:56,560
Speaker 4: And I was like yeah.

843
00:41:57,239 --> 00:41:59,120
Speaker 3: And I was like, you know, I know that you

844
00:41:59,239 --> 00:42:01,439
Speaker 3: really love to follow rules, but just imagine if Rosa

845
00:42:01,480 --> 00:42:03,840
Speaker 3: Parks never sat in the front of the bus.

846
00:42:03,880 --> 00:42:05,160
Speaker 1: Just imagine what would have happened.

847
00:42:05,480 --> 00:42:06,880
Speaker 3: And I was like, and this is a good example

848
00:42:06,920 --> 00:42:10,120
Speaker 3: of sometimes we have to say fuck those rules and

849
00:42:10,320 --> 00:42:11,719
Speaker 3: go against the rules to.

850
00:42:11,680 --> 00:42:14,360
Speaker 1: Make the change that you want to make. And she

851
00:42:14,520 --> 00:42:15,560
Speaker 1: was like okay, And.

852
00:42:15,520 --> 00:42:17,880
Speaker 3: I was like, gosh, she's hearing me, like hearing me

853
00:42:17,960 --> 00:42:19,279
Speaker 3: because I want to park in the fucking wred.

854
00:42:19,280 --> 00:42:20,040
Speaker 1: Shut the fuck up.

855
00:42:20,880 --> 00:42:23,440
Speaker 4: These are pervotal moments in our kids' lives.

856
00:42:23,520 --> 00:42:26,960
Speaker 2: I mean, even for you listening, I think we all

857
00:42:26,960 --> 00:42:30,560
Speaker 2: here heard that story all one through fifth grade or whatever.

858
00:42:30,600 --> 00:42:30,879
Speaker 4: The fuck.

859
00:42:30,920 --> 00:42:33,480
Speaker 2: They never stop telling it because there's no other important

860
00:42:34,239 --> 00:42:35,840
Speaker 2: marks in fucking black history.

861
00:42:35,880 --> 00:42:37,520
Speaker 4: But that's a joke if there are.

862
00:42:38,480 --> 00:42:42,839
Speaker 2: But yeah, sometimes following the rules is not what you're

863
00:42:42,840 --> 00:42:43,480
Speaker 2: supposed to do.

864
00:42:43,880 --> 00:42:46,719
Speaker 4: In fact, people who follow the rules make no change.

865
00:42:47,200 --> 00:42:51,279
Speaker 2: So for everybody in our comments talking fucking shit for

866
00:42:51,360 --> 00:42:54,200
Speaker 2: our parents, anybody else has anything else to say about

867
00:42:54,200 --> 00:42:57,720
Speaker 2: what the fuck we're doing. No change comes from well

868
00:42:58,040 --> 00:43:02,160
Speaker 2: behaved women. So when we're loud, when we're rowdy, when

869
00:43:02,160 --> 00:43:05,200
Speaker 2: we're doing whatever the fuck we want, it's because we

870
00:43:05,239 --> 00:43:08,040
Speaker 2: have an agenda, and that agenda is to free the

871
00:43:08,120 --> 00:43:10,000
Speaker 2: people in their minds.

872
00:43:10,480 --> 00:43:10,680
Speaker 1: Wait.

873
00:43:10,719 --> 00:43:13,480
Speaker 3: I have one other random fact, and this is actually

874
00:43:13,600 --> 00:43:17,240
Speaker 3: this could be for today's years old. And I learned

875
00:43:17,280 --> 00:43:19,920
Speaker 3: this because when I was telling my daughter this, then

876
00:43:19,960 --> 00:43:21,839
Speaker 3: that night we went to dinner with my cousin and

877
00:43:22,440 --> 00:43:24,719
Speaker 3: she was I reasked her who Rosa Parks was, and

878
00:43:24,719 --> 00:43:26,360
Speaker 3: if she knew how old she would be right, like

879
00:43:26,440 --> 00:43:28,640
Speaker 3: be at this current age, I think she'd be like,

880
00:43:29,800 --> 00:43:31,480
Speaker 3: I think it was like one hundred and ten or something,

881
00:43:31,600 --> 00:43:32,399
Speaker 3: one hundred and nine.

882
00:43:32,680 --> 00:43:33,640
Speaker 4: Rosa just died.

883
00:43:34,280 --> 00:43:37,120
Speaker 1: No, she died like fifteen, ten years ago.

884
00:43:37,280 --> 00:43:38,879
Speaker 4: No, she did look it up.

885
00:43:38,960 --> 00:43:39,319
Speaker 1: She did.

886
00:43:39,440 --> 00:43:40,520
Speaker 4: Yeah, I guess I reads.

887
00:43:40,760 --> 00:43:45,520
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, since we've been like recently ten years ago.

888
00:43:45,560 --> 00:43:47,439
Speaker 4: Okay, child, is you are twenty five?

889
00:43:47,480 --> 00:43:52,799
Speaker 1: No, bitch, that was recently twenty five, two thousand and five.

890
00:43:53,080 --> 00:43:55,360
Speaker 2: So ye, she died even longer ago than that today,

891
00:43:55,440 --> 00:43:57,439
Speaker 2: that nineteen years ago, bitch, five.

892
00:43:57,480 --> 00:43:59,400
Speaker 4: Was just around the corner. I was just in eleventh grade.

893
00:43:59,520 --> 00:43:59,840
Speaker 1: Okay.

894
00:44:00,440 --> 00:44:03,480
Speaker 3: Anyway, my cousin was telling me that she used to

895
00:44:03,480 --> 00:44:05,680
Speaker 3: write letters to Rosa Parks and she would write her back.

896
00:44:06,280 --> 00:44:09,160
Speaker 1: Really, yes, that's so cool, I know, And she said.

897
00:44:08,960 --> 00:44:11,040
Speaker 3: Yeah, she wrote me back many times then when I

898
00:44:11,080 --> 00:44:12,040
Speaker 3: was a kid, because.

899
00:44:11,800 --> 00:44:15,040
Speaker 1: I will Yeah, yeah, put the fuck because I was right.

900
00:44:15,280 --> 00:44:17,000
Speaker 4: I never writing I don't know.

901
00:44:17,040 --> 00:44:18,719
Speaker 1: But then she said, do you know that this is

902
00:44:18,760 --> 00:44:20,120
Speaker 1: a fun fact about Rosa Parks.

903
00:44:20,160 --> 00:44:23,680
Speaker 3: Did you know that the owner of Little Caesar's paid

904
00:44:23,760 --> 00:44:26,839
Speaker 3: her rent for like the last from twenty five years

905
00:44:26,840 --> 00:44:29,719
Speaker 3: from like she was like homeless. Basically, he got her

906
00:44:29,760 --> 00:44:32,040
Speaker 3: an apartment and paid her rent for ten years. She

907
00:44:32,080 --> 00:44:33,799
Speaker 3: didn't even know it was him that was paying it,

908
00:44:34,080 --> 00:44:36,000
Speaker 3: and then eventually she found out and he paid her

909
00:44:36,080 --> 00:44:37,520
Speaker 3: rent for the duration of her life.

910
00:44:38,120 --> 00:44:40,799
Speaker 4: Wow. Yeah, it's got chows. I don't even know who

911
00:44:40,840 --> 00:44:41,920
Speaker 4: mister Little Caesar is.

912
00:44:41,960 --> 00:44:44,399
Speaker 1: He's worth six billion dollars and he's also dead.

913
00:44:44,480 --> 00:44:48,280
Speaker 2: Can you imagine doing all you have done for history?

914
00:44:48,320 --> 00:44:52,160
Speaker 2: You've been in every motherfucking history book and been ending homeless.

915
00:44:52,320 --> 00:44:54,760
Speaker 2: Can you imagine them writing you up in every history

916
00:44:54,760 --> 00:44:57,879
Speaker 2: book and these motherfucker the word I want to say

917
00:44:58,120 --> 00:45:02,839
Speaker 2: is probably these motherfucking crackers got you out here homeless,

918
00:45:03,239 --> 00:45:06,520
Speaker 2: but they've used you and you're liking to paint this piece.

919
00:45:06,560 --> 00:45:08,879
Speaker 1: Yeah, there are your pictures in every classroom.

920
00:45:08,400 --> 00:45:11,759
Speaker 2: Fucking classroom, but you can't even afford to live in

921
00:45:11,800 --> 00:45:12,320
Speaker 2: this bitch.

922
00:45:13,239 --> 00:45:16,080
Speaker 4: That's crazy, little mister, little Caesar.

923
00:45:15,840 --> 00:45:17,320
Speaker 1: Mister Caesar, mister Caesar.

924
00:45:18,840 --> 00:45:20,919
Speaker 2: You know what, it's just a reminder to do something

925
00:45:21,000 --> 00:45:23,120
Speaker 2: kind for somebody, whether they know it or not.

926
00:45:23,280 --> 00:45:26,040
Speaker 4: Right, But it's like, how do you like? He was

927
00:45:26,080 --> 00:45:28,000
Speaker 4: somewhere like, where's this woman at? I need to pick

928
00:45:28,040 --> 00:45:28,399
Speaker 4: her rent?

929
00:45:29,080 --> 00:45:31,480
Speaker 1: I mean, it's nothing, It's like nothing to him.

930
00:45:31,800 --> 00:45:34,719
Speaker 3: And just imagine how many legends, how many people that

931
00:45:34,719 --> 00:45:37,399
Speaker 3: have impacted our society that are like down and out

932
00:45:37,520 --> 00:45:40,319
Speaker 3: that it would be absolutely nothing for someone to come

933
00:45:40,360 --> 00:45:43,120
Speaker 3: in and just fucking save their life a little bit.

934
00:45:43,200 --> 00:45:45,759
Speaker 2: Speaking of this, I'm gonna go dark because I have

935
00:45:45,840 --> 00:45:51,240
Speaker 2: no choice my darkness. Did you know that the five

936
00:45:51,560 --> 00:45:54,520
Speaker 2: richest men in the world, there's only five. The five

937
00:45:54,600 --> 00:45:59,279
Speaker 2: richest men in the world have doubled their wealth since

938
00:45:59,360 --> 00:46:01,360
Speaker 2: twenty twenty COVID.

939
00:46:01,880 --> 00:46:04,200
Speaker 4: I know, but it's only been four years.

940
00:46:04,960 --> 00:46:08,880
Speaker 12: You're the fucking fifth five richest niggas in the world,

941
00:46:09,040 --> 00:46:12,720
Speaker 12: and you've doubled that wealth since fucking COVID, you bitch

942
00:46:12,760 --> 00:46:17,040
Speaker 12: ass niggas. People are fucking starving, and then the government

943
00:46:17,080 --> 00:46:19,920
Speaker 12: is getting all this money to kill people in other countries,

944
00:46:20,360 --> 00:46:22,520
Speaker 12: but you fucking five bucks.

945
00:46:23,360 --> 00:46:24,360
Speaker 4: You can't even spend.

946
00:46:24,440 --> 00:46:26,279
Speaker 2: First of all, four out of three, out of five

947
00:46:26,280 --> 00:46:28,279
Speaker 2: of them are fucking about to die anyway if they

948
00:46:28,280 --> 00:46:30,960
Speaker 2: haven't stolen eleven hundred black people's organs.

949
00:46:31,480 --> 00:46:33,359
Speaker 4: But we're gonna get shut down for that.

950
00:46:34,560 --> 00:46:38,200
Speaker 2: But you haven't doubled your wealth while the rest of

951
00:46:38,239 --> 00:46:39,960
Speaker 2: the world, like you could literally.

952
00:46:39,880 --> 00:46:43,560
Speaker 4: Give that back and be perfectly fucking fine.

953
00:46:43,600 --> 00:46:45,560
Speaker 2: And three of you niggas are about to die any

954
00:46:45,600 --> 00:46:47,640
Speaker 2: second now, so really, you need to just let it go.

955
00:46:48,600 --> 00:46:51,920
Speaker 2: I can't imagine having access to that much money, you

956
00:46:51,920 --> 00:46:54,960
Speaker 2: can't even have that much luxury, and then still being

957
00:46:55,000 --> 00:46:58,000
Speaker 2: like fuck the poors.

958
00:46:58,200 --> 00:46:58,600
Speaker 4: Wild.

959
00:46:58,840 --> 00:47:01,600
Speaker 2: I can't even imagine getting that much wealth and still

960
00:47:01,640 --> 00:47:02,640
Speaker 2: having hate in my heart.

961
00:47:03,960 --> 00:47:05,920
Speaker 4: It's wild, Like, what do you have to hate?

962
00:47:06,560 --> 00:47:07,080
Speaker 7: You rich?

963
00:47:07,960 --> 00:47:09,600
Speaker 4: You might as well as give it out. I'm gonna

964
00:47:09,600 --> 00:47:11,600
Speaker 4: go to all the poor countries take a sack. I

965
00:47:11,640 --> 00:47:13,439
Speaker 4: don't know, it's just so why.

966
00:47:13,560 --> 00:47:15,360
Speaker 1: They might not be hateful, they might be some happy

967
00:47:15,360 --> 00:47:16,040
Speaker 1: old white men.

968
00:47:16,160 --> 00:47:16,400
Speaker 9: M M.

969
00:47:16,640 --> 00:47:19,040
Speaker 4: I saw them.

970
00:47:19,080 --> 00:47:21,720
Speaker 2: None of them are happy, none of them are getting

971
00:47:22,120 --> 00:47:24,240
Speaker 2: They're not getting fucked sucked.

972
00:47:24,520 --> 00:47:27,240
Speaker 3: They're they're definitely getting sucked and sucks. They had gotten

973
00:47:27,239 --> 00:47:28,799
Speaker 3: fucked in such a lot in their life because they've

974
00:47:28,800 --> 00:47:29,279
Speaker 3: paid for it.

975
00:47:29,440 --> 00:47:30,359
Speaker 4: Yeah, but that's not love.

976
00:47:30,560 --> 00:47:34,200
Speaker 2: That isn't that that that that vibrates different those little penises.

977
00:47:34,239 --> 00:47:38,200
Speaker 4: They don't look happy. No, I saw them. Anyway, back

978
00:47:39,120 --> 00:47:41,719
Speaker 4: to a regularly scheduled love program. Okay, you're not a

979
00:47:41,760 --> 00:47:45,080
Speaker 4: black panther that you guys know. My middle name is Asada.

980
00:47:44,680 --> 00:47:50,239
Speaker 4: I'm kind, but deep down I have reach. Anyway, I've

981
00:47:50,280 --> 00:47:53,320
Speaker 4: written you a love letter. I wrote you one too, okay,

982
00:47:53,400 --> 00:47:59,480
Speaker 4: in the in the in the spirit of love and friendship.

983
00:48:00,520 --> 00:48:03,680
Speaker 2: We've written each other letters because that's how cheesy we

984
00:48:03,760 --> 00:48:05,240
Speaker 2: are cheesy.

985
00:48:05,280 --> 00:48:07,560
Speaker 3: And also I want you guys to consider writing a

986
00:48:07,560 --> 00:48:09,520
Speaker 3: love letter to your friends, because I think it's really

987
00:48:09,560 --> 00:48:11,319
Speaker 3: important and it was really I mean, I wrote you

988
00:48:11,320 --> 00:48:13,200
Speaker 3: a love letter in our book as well.

989
00:48:13,320 --> 00:48:14,279
Speaker 4: Oh yeah you did?

990
00:48:14,600 --> 00:48:17,239
Speaker 1: Did I read that? You should? You never read it?

991
00:48:17,680 --> 00:48:20,040
Speaker 2: I don't you know, honestly, confession, I don't know if

992
00:48:20,040 --> 00:48:21,040
Speaker 2: I've read our book.

993
00:48:21,120 --> 00:48:22,319
Speaker 4: To bat, have you?

994
00:48:22,800 --> 00:48:24,360
Speaker 1: I mean in the process of writing it.

995
00:48:24,400 --> 00:48:26,839
Speaker 2: I have, Yeah, but that's when we're like in Costa Rica,

996
00:48:27,080 --> 00:48:30,319
Speaker 2: two days before a retreat looking for spy.

997
00:48:31,120 --> 00:48:32,960
Speaker 1: I think I'm on like chapter three on Autio.

998
00:48:33,040 --> 00:48:37,400
Speaker 2: Really wow, I never even downloaded it. I don't want

999
00:48:37,440 --> 00:48:38,280
Speaker 2: to hear my own voice.

1000
00:48:38,600 --> 00:48:40,880
Speaker 1: Why bitch, pay us? What the fun? Give me that?

1001
00:48:40,960 --> 00:48:41,879
Speaker 1: Give us the.

1002
00:48:45,480 --> 00:48:46,920
Speaker 4: Yeah, I guess I do have a love letter to

1003
00:48:46,960 --> 00:48:51,320
Speaker 4: you too. Did I need to read that book? Okay?

1004
00:48:51,360 --> 00:48:54,359
Speaker 4: So I'm an analogue girl. So I wrote my own paper.

1005
00:48:54,480 --> 00:48:54,840
Speaker 7: Write it?

1006
00:48:55,160 --> 00:48:57,640
Speaker 1: Wow? Three page? What is the three pages.

1007
00:48:57,760 --> 00:48:59,760
Speaker 4: I'm spend taking a full page?

1008
00:49:00,320 --> 00:49:05,880
Speaker 2: Let up and not mclosed with the kids.

1009
00:49:07,320 --> 00:49:14,720
Speaker 1: Okay, gonna make it comfortable. Okay, this is so cheesy.

1010
00:49:15,160 --> 00:49:19,280
Speaker 4: Wow, she's up your friends. It's very important. My sister,

1011
00:49:19,680 --> 00:49:21,960
Speaker 4: my bestie, my wife, my soulmate.

1012
00:49:22,520 --> 00:49:25,440
Speaker 2: I had no idea this life changing love and friendship

1013
00:49:25,560 --> 00:49:28,360
Speaker 2: was on its way. I truly had no idea I

1014
00:49:28,400 --> 00:49:32,320
Speaker 2: could experience love like this in adulthood. You have truly

1015
00:49:32,360 --> 00:49:36,960
Speaker 2: been my mirror because of the love strength drive you exude,

1016
00:49:37,239 --> 00:49:38,120
Speaker 2: you showed.

1017
00:49:37,840 --> 00:49:38,840
Speaker 4: Me my own power.

1018
00:49:39,760 --> 00:49:43,200
Speaker 2: This love was so unexpected, yet so intentional and divine.

1019
00:49:43,840 --> 00:49:47,440
Speaker 2: Experiencing your love allowed me to drop guards I hadn't

1020
00:49:47,440 --> 00:49:50,160
Speaker 2: even realized I had up Erica.

1021
00:49:50,560 --> 00:49:54,240
Speaker 4: You're beautiful, wild, emotional.

1022
00:49:54,200 --> 00:50:02,840
Speaker 2: Strong, moody, resilient, driven, poised, powerful, gentle, funny, silly and fun.

1023
00:50:03,400 --> 00:50:05,640
Speaker 4: The amount of memories we share are endless.

1024
00:50:09,680 --> 00:50:14,120
Speaker 2: We have We have such a good range, from the

1025
00:50:14,160 --> 00:50:16,640
Speaker 2: morning you drove me to planned parenthood at five am

1026
00:50:16,640 --> 00:50:19,400
Speaker 2: when we first started, to that night you showed up

1027
00:50:19,400 --> 00:50:23,480
Speaker 2: at my apartment and shambles over new news to Coachella's

1028
00:50:24,080 --> 00:50:31,480
Speaker 2: Goddess self, coins named Goddess, experiences, tours, tor shenanigans.

1029
00:50:33,040 --> 00:50:35,360
Speaker 4: Late nights, uh late nights in.

1030
00:50:35,440 --> 00:50:42,640
Speaker 2: Your dining room, new boyfriends, breakups, arguments over boobs and boys,

1031
00:50:44,800 --> 00:50:48,719
Speaker 2: to signing six figure contracts. I could honestly go on

1032
00:50:48,840 --> 00:50:52,560
Speaker 2: for hours, but the point is I could not imagine this.

1033
00:50:52,680 --> 00:50:56,120
Speaker 4: Life without you. I love you so deeply.

1034
00:50:56,320 --> 00:51:01,880
Speaker 2: This covenant, this entity is unbreakable and divine. Sharing and friendship, business,

1035
00:51:02,040 --> 00:51:04,759
Speaker 2: motherhood and growth with you has been an honor, And

1036
00:51:04,800 --> 00:51:07,279
Speaker 2: I know God sent us each other to shake shit

1037
00:51:07,400 --> 00:51:10,959
Speaker 2: up and make shit happen. No matter where life takes us,

1038
00:51:11,080 --> 00:51:13,680
Speaker 2: I will always be here for you, to love on you,

1039
00:51:14,080 --> 00:51:16,080
Speaker 2: to cry with you, to fight with you.

1040
00:51:16,560 --> 00:51:18,960
Speaker 4: If I that means not with you but with your mother.

1041
00:51:19,160 --> 00:51:19,920
Speaker 1: Yeah, be gross.

1042
00:51:21,120 --> 00:51:25,320
Speaker 2: If I ever, if I ever make you feel unappreciated

1043
00:51:25,440 --> 00:51:29,640
Speaker 2: or unloved by me, always know that's cap Oh okay,

1044
00:51:29,880 --> 00:51:30,600
Speaker 2: yeah like that.

1045
00:51:32,719 --> 00:51:35,239
Speaker 4: At my core, you are truly a piece of me.

1046
00:51:35,560 --> 00:51:38,560
Speaker 1: I love you too. Thank you.

1047
00:51:42,560 --> 00:51:43,560
Speaker 7: Okay.

1048
00:51:44,760 --> 00:51:48,000
Speaker 1: I am not an analog girl. I am actually, but

1049
00:51:48,760 --> 00:51:49,919
Speaker 1: this was easier in my phone.

1050
00:51:50,080 --> 00:51:50,520
Speaker 4: Let me tell you.

1051
00:51:50,640 --> 00:51:53,000
Speaker 2: Erica fucking text me last night like, don't forget to

1052
00:51:53,040 --> 00:51:55,839
Speaker 2: write my love letter, and I was like, okay.

1053
00:51:55,560 --> 00:51:58,120
Speaker 4: And then this morning I was like, fuck, I forgot.

1054
00:51:58,560 --> 00:52:01,600
Speaker 4: I never forget and schedule it. So I intentionally ubered

1055
00:52:01,600 --> 00:52:02,840
Speaker 4: here so that I could write it. And then she

1056
00:52:02,880 --> 00:52:04,640
Speaker 4: got here, She's like, you didn't already. I said, bitch,

1057
00:52:04,640 --> 00:52:05,359
Speaker 4: you reminded me.

1058
00:52:05,719 --> 00:52:08,080
Speaker 1: I wasn't. I didn't uber I was driving.

1059
00:52:08,480 --> 00:52:09,520
Speaker 4: You didn't take your own mind.

1060
00:52:09,520 --> 00:52:10,680
Speaker 3: I thought maybe I was going to do it on

1061
00:52:10,719 --> 00:52:12,160
Speaker 3: the whim, you know how like people when they accept

1062
00:52:12,160 --> 00:52:14,160
Speaker 3: their accepted space and then they dried it on the wind,

1063
00:52:14,160 --> 00:52:15,560
Speaker 3: and then they fuck it up and then they're mad.

1064
00:52:15,400 --> 00:52:17,960
Speaker 1: Because they should have said thousand thank you. But then

1065
00:52:18,000 --> 00:52:19,359
Speaker 1: I said, no, let me write this shit down.

1066
00:52:22,200 --> 00:52:28,360
Speaker 3: Okay, Jamila, God knew I needed this friendship and the sisterhood.

1067
00:52:28,360 --> 00:52:30,840
Speaker 3: Back when I stopped you on Instagram in twenty fifteen.

1068
00:52:32,080 --> 00:52:34,239
Speaker 3: Never in my wildest dreams could I have imagined that

1069
00:52:34,280 --> 00:52:36,680
Speaker 3: we would have created a relationship that has not only

1070
00:52:36,719 --> 00:52:40,400
Speaker 3: comforted me in my darkest hours, but blossomed and expanded

1071
00:52:40,400 --> 00:52:43,160
Speaker 3: my life in ways I didn't even think possible. The

1072
00:52:43,200 --> 00:52:45,120
Speaker 3: moment I saw you, you were a mirror to me,

1073
00:52:45,400 --> 00:52:47,640
Speaker 3: a mirror to the things that I deny to myself,

1074
00:52:47,680 --> 00:52:50,600
Speaker 3: and also a mirror in the similar similarities that we

1075
00:52:50,640 --> 00:52:52,920
Speaker 3: share and I had been searching for in a friend.

1076
00:52:54,080 --> 00:52:56,960
Speaker 1: Our friendship has shown me. Our friendship has shown me

1077
00:52:57,040 --> 00:52:58,280
Speaker 1: how crucial.

1078
00:52:59,520 --> 00:53:02,400
Speaker 3: It is for women to have at least one woman

1079
00:53:02,440 --> 00:53:04,520
Speaker 3: in their life that they love just as much as

1080
00:53:04,520 --> 00:53:06,560
Speaker 3: the person they choose to share their body, time, and

1081
00:53:06,600 --> 00:53:09,799
Speaker 3: heart with. You have protected me more than any man has.

1082
00:53:10,360 --> 00:53:13,080
Speaker 3: You have championed me more than my family members have.

1083
00:53:13,600 --> 00:53:15,400
Speaker 3: You have been patient with me like a mother is

1084
00:53:15,480 --> 00:53:18,360
Speaker 3: patient to her child. You have shown me that you

1085
00:53:18,480 --> 00:53:20,560
Speaker 3: love me over and over, even when you think you

1086
00:53:20,600 --> 00:53:21,680
Speaker 3: haven't cause you think you're not.

1087
00:53:21,640 --> 00:53:22,279
Speaker 1: Good at that part.

1088
00:53:23,960 --> 00:53:25,640
Speaker 3: You have been a shoulder to cry on and a

1089
00:53:25,640 --> 00:53:27,480
Speaker 3: person I call to share all my good and bad

1090
00:53:27,560 --> 00:53:30,279
Speaker 3: choices with, just like people choose to spend their life

1091
00:53:30,280 --> 00:53:32,479
Speaker 3: with someone and see no end in sight of their love.

1092
00:53:32,560 --> 00:53:35,200
Speaker 3: I see no insight, no end in sight for ours.

1093
00:53:35,800 --> 00:53:39,359
Speaker 3: I'm committed to this friendship for life, and even when

1094
00:53:39,400 --> 00:53:41,720
Speaker 3: we have children or get married. Just know you'll always

1095
00:53:41,719 --> 00:53:43,560
Speaker 3: be my wife and I'll always be here for you,

1096
00:53:43,640 --> 00:53:46,400
Speaker 3: no matter how dark or light it gets. You are

1097
00:53:46,440 --> 00:53:49,439
Speaker 3: my soulmate, and God did her mother fucking thing when

1098
00:53:49,480 --> 00:53:53,239
Speaker 3: she summoned us together. I want nothing more than for

1099
00:53:53,320 --> 00:53:56,319
Speaker 3: you to be successful in all your devil endeavors with

1100
00:53:56,400 --> 00:53:59,080
Speaker 3: me and outside of me. I want you to continue

1101
00:53:59,120 --> 00:54:04,320
Speaker 3: to experience juicy sex, soul filling love in all your relationships,

1102
00:54:04,600 --> 00:54:07,000
Speaker 3: and to share your magic everywhere you go, to be

1103
00:54:07,080 --> 00:54:08,160
Speaker 3: exactly as you are.

1104
00:54:08,520 --> 00:54:13,200
Speaker 1: Titties over sharing it all. Thank you for sharing your

1105
00:54:13,320 --> 00:54:16,000
Speaker 1: love and life with me. Happy Valentine's Day, my love

1106
00:54:16,200 --> 00:54:17,160
Speaker 1: cheers to many more.

1107
00:54:17,239 --> 00:54:18,560
Speaker 4: Oh, Happy Valentine Day.

1108
00:54:18,560 --> 00:54:21,560
Speaker 1: I M.

1109
00:54:23,360 --> 00:54:26,160
Speaker 4: Wow, I'm an emotional bite.

1110
00:54:27,760 --> 00:54:28,120
Speaker 1: I kind.

1111
00:54:28,239 --> 00:54:30,000
Speaker 3: I'm trying to hold it together cause I don't know

1112
00:54:30,040 --> 00:54:32,400
Speaker 3: if this water is and this mascara is waterproof.

1113
00:54:32,480 --> 00:54:32,719
Speaker 2: Is it?

1114
00:54:32,880 --> 00:54:35,480
Speaker 4: I think it looks like it's holding up.

1115
00:54:36,000 --> 00:54:39,000
Speaker 1: I told you, I googled it. I googled the mascar

1116
00:54:39,160 --> 00:54:40,680
Speaker 1: I don't think I looked up waterproof.

1117
00:54:40,719 --> 00:54:42,600
Speaker 4: Do you research the shit out of this? Mascar?

1118
00:54:42,719 --> 00:54:43,839
Speaker 1: You know my researching? Yes, bitch?

1119
00:54:43,880 --> 00:54:44,960
Speaker 4: Wait is my makeup fucked up?

1120
00:54:45,000 --> 00:54:45,799
Speaker 2: Now? I don't know.

1121
00:54:46,080 --> 00:54:47,600
Speaker 1: Just we'll just dry a little hair. Okay.

1122
00:54:47,680 --> 00:54:50,000
Speaker 3: Wait, speaking of research, because I did do some research

1123
00:54:50,000 --> 00:54:52,160
Speaker 3: and I wanted to share some fa facts about why

1124
00:54:52,160 --> 00:54:54,479
Speaker 3: it's so important for women to have friends and why

1125
00:54:55,120 --> 00:54:59,120
Speaker 3: this relationship in particular has been so healing, has been

1126
00:54:59,200 --> 00:55:02,200
Speaker 3: so like ben official to my health overall in general.

1127
00:55:02,360 --> 00:55:03,360
Speaker 1: Because I was really curious.

1128
00:55:03,400 --> 00:55:05,840
Speaker 3: I was like, what is like, what are the stats

1129
00:55:05,840 --> 00:55:09,960
Speaker 3: around like female friendships? And it was so interesting the

1130
00:55:10,000 --> 00:55:10,840
Speaker 3: things that I found.

1131
00:55:11,239 --> 00:55:11,959
Speaker 4: What did you find?

1132
00:55:12,040 --> 00:55:12,880
Speaker 1: Okay, I'm gonna tell you.

1133
00:55:15,880 --> 00:55:18,360
Speaker 3: I found that so it says how long does the

1134
00:55:18,400 --> 00:55:22,839
Speaker 3: average female friendship last? Recent research actually tells us that

1135
00:55:22,880 --> 00:55:26,719
Speaker 3: the average female friendship lasts sixteen years, which is six

1136
00:55:26,800 --> 00:55:27,759
Speaker 3: years longer than.

1137
00:55:27,680 --> 00:55:29,880
Speaker 1: The average romantic relationship.

1138
00:55:31,480 --> 00:55:35,360
Speaker 3: If a friendship lasts longer than seven years, psychologists say

1139
00:55:35,400 --> 00:55:36,719
Speaker 3: it will last a lifetime.

1140
00:55:37,239 --> 00:55:39,320
Speaker 4: We're nine years in so rewards.

1141
00:55:39,480 --> 00:55:42,440
Speaker 1: Yeah, done, it's done.

1142
00:55:42,800 --> 00:55:46,680
Speaker 3: And then there's this apparently there's this like I don't know,

1143
00:55:46,760 --> 00:55:48,080
Speaker 3: this rule around friendship.

1144
00:55:48,120 --> 00:55:50,280
Speaker 1: It's the eighty twenty Rule of friendship.

1145
00:55:51,440 --> 00:55:55,000
Speaker 3: It says eighty percent of eighty percent of the value

1146
00:55:55,040 --> 00:55:58,400
Speaker 3: of your friendships will come from twenty percent of your friends.

1147
00:55:58,760 --> 00:56:01,840
Speaker 3: For example, you might have ten casual friends, but probably

1148
00:56:01,880 --> 00:56:05,480
Speaker 3: only two or three are dark hour friends, like the

1149
00:56:05,480 --> 00:56:07,640
Speaker 3: person to recall in the dark darkness of your hour.

1150
00:56:07,719 --> 00:56:09,840
Speaker 3: These friends will support you through tough times and stay

1151
00:56:09,840 --> 00:56:13,160
Speaker 3: with you without any selfish benefit. And I was thinking

1152
00:56:13,160 --> 00:56:15,520
Speaker 3: about that, and I was thinking about, like how many

1153
00:56:15,520 --> 00:56:20,719
Speaker 3: women in general think they have an eighty percentage of

1154
00:56:20,719 --> 00:56:23,719
Speaker 3: friends Like that really would be there, but then things happen, like,

1155
00:56:23,760 --> 00:56:25,840
Speaker 3: for example, you have a child, right, Like there's so

1156
00:56:25,840 --> 00:56:27,600
Speaker 3: many women that encounter this when you have a kid,

1157
00:56:27,680 --> 00:56:29,920
Speaker 3: and you're like, where the fuck are all my friends?

1158
00:56:30,360 --> 00:56:33,600
Speaker 3: And you realize, like your friend group gets substantially smaller

1159
00:56:33,640 --> 00:56:36,840
Speaker 3: when you have these we have these rights of passage

1160
00:56:36,880 --> 00:56:39,680
Speaker 3: in your life, whether that's in death, whether that's in birth,

1161
00:56:39,760 --> 00:56:40,560
Speaker 3: whatever it is.

1162
00:56:40,480 --> 00:56:41,800
Speaker 1: When you need that support.

1163
00:56:42,880 --> 00:56:44,759
Speaker 3: And I was like, I think a lot more women

1164
00:56:44,800 --> 00:56:48,520
Speaker 3: need to really take inventory of like their friends, like do.

1165
00:56:48,600 --> 00:56:51,480
Speaker 1: You have an eighty twenty do you even have twenty?

1166
00:56:52,840 --> 00:56:53,000
Speaker 1: You know?

1167
00:56:53,440 --> 00:56:56,239
Speaker 2: I think the fucked up part about this because like

1168
00:56:56,280 --> 00:56:59,040
Speaker 2: when I as you talk about this. I'm thinking about

1169
00:56:59,239 --> 00:57:02,840
Speaker 2: particular time in my life where I have some friends

1170
00:57:02,840 --> 00:57:05,120
Speaker 2: that I've known my whole life and that I've just

1171
00:57:05,239 --> 00:57:08,000
Speaker 2: like gone to in certain situations and they did not

1172
00:57:08,280 --> 00:57:10,000
Speaker 2: show up in the way I thought that they would,

1173
00:57:10,120 --> 00:57:13,440
Speaker 2: and like how deeply devastating that was for me, Like

1174
00:57:13,560 --> 00:57:14,640
Speaker 2: my cancer, I feck and.

1175
00:57:14,680 --> 00:57:15,839
Speaker 4: Self can't take it.

1176
00:57:16,520 --> 00:57:20,280
Speaker 2: But I think when I met you, or when we

1177
00:57:20,320 --> 00:57:23,280
Speaker 2: started to start this and like rekindle this friendship, I

1178
00:57:23,320 --> 00:57:24,160
Speaker 2: was in a place that I.

1179
00:57:24,080 --> 00:57:28,840
Speaker 4: Didn't realize, like I really was like not fuck bitches,

1180
00:57:28,840 --> 00:57:31,080
Speaker 4: because I'm really a girl's girl, but.

1181
00:57:31,200 --> 00:57:33,840
Speaker 2: I was in need of like a friendship, that dark

1182
00:57:33,920 --> 00:57:36,840
Speaker 2: hour of friendship in a way that I thought I

1183
00:57:37,000 --> 00:57:39,920
Speaker 2: had and I did it, and it was it was

1184
00:57:39,960 --> 00:57:41,320
Speaker 2: like I was in a time where I had lost

1185
00:57:41,360 --> 00:57:41,840
Speaker 2: I was not.

1186
00:57:41,760 --> 00:57:43,880
Speaker 4: In my relationship with my baby daddy that I'd been with.

1187
00:57:43,920 --> 00:57:48,480
Speaker 2: For years, and I was going through really hard times

1188
00:57:48,520 --> 00:57:50,080
Speaker 2: and the people I thought that were going to really

1189
00:57:50,120 --> 00:57:54,640
Speaker 2: show up for me did not and it was difficult.

1190
00:57:54,720 --> 00:57:56,880
Speaker 2: And then when I found you, I was like I

1191
00:57:56,880 --> 00:57:58,400
Speaker 2: I didn't think that there was a time where I

1192
00:57:58,400 --> 00:58:01,240
Speaker 2: could find a friend of this depth.

1193
00:58:01,360 --> 00:58:04,000
Speaker 4: This age, at this age, these are the friends I got.

1194
00:58:04,800 --> 00:58:06,920
Speaker 4: This is what I got. This is why I got

1195
00:58:06,920 --> 00:58:10,520
Speaker 4: to deal with these bitches. I'm like, they're got my nerves.

1196
00:58:10,600 --> 00:58:12,800
Speaker 4: I don't have no choice if I have no friends.

1197
00:58:13,640 --> 00:58:15,320
Speaker 2: So I think there are times like where you showed

1198
00:58:15,400 --> 00:58:16,840
Speaker 2: up for me and I was like, oh shit, like

1199
00:58:16,880 --> 00:58:20,040
Speaker 2: this is different than that, and I can I can

1200
00:58:20,240 --> 00:58:23,439
Speaker 2: release that part of me that doesn't expect that love

1201
00:58:23,600 --> 00:58:26,200
Speaker 2: or doesn't you know, want to count on a person

1202
00:58:26,240 --> 00:58:28,919
Speaker 2: to show up in their darkest hour. But I think

1203
00:58:28,920 --> 00:58:31,800
Speaker 2: that was one of the things that was extremely shifting

1204
00:58:31,960 --> 00:58:34,320
Speaker 2: for a relationship because I think when you start or

1205
00:58:34,320 --> 00:58:35,760
Speaker 2: an adult friendship.

1206
00:58:35,320 --> 00:58:39,640
Speaker 4: It is with caution, you know, like who is this bitch?

1207
00:58:40,560 --> 00:58:41,040
Speaker 4: Who are you?

1208
00:58:41,160 --> 00:58:41,240
Speaker 2: Like?

1209
00:58:41,280 --> 00:58:42,040
Speaker 4: What do you really want?

1210
00:58:42,160 --> 00:58:45,520
Speaker 2: You know, the same people, yeah, like do you know okay?

1211
00:58:46,360 --> 00:58:49,400
Speaker 2: But when you started to show up for me, you know,

1212
00:58:49,440 --> 00:58:52,919
Speaker 2: because inevitably it doesn't start that way, but when things

1213
00:58:52,960 --> 00:58:54,840
Speaker 2: start real, shit started to happen and.

1214
00:58:54,760 --> 00:58:57,120
Speaker 4: You continued continue to be there.

1215
00:58:57,240 --> 00:58:59,920
Speaker 2: Like I got an abortion the first year that the

1216
00:59:00,240 --> 00:59:03,200
Speaker 2: fucking show started, and it was with the nigga across country.

1217
00:59:03,240 --> 00:59:05,160
Speaker 2: I didn't have no business having a baby with And

1218
00:59:05,200 --> 00:59:08,480
Speaker 2: thank god, my inner witch said bitch s shitsh morshin

1219
00:59:11,720 --> 00:59:16,160
Speaker 2: for real and Erica took me to play Para hairt

1220
00:59:16,200 --> 00:59:17,880
Speaker 2: like five am. I wrote about this in the book,

1221
00:59:18,000 --> 00:59:21,400
Speaker 2: with fucking Iry in the backseat, and I was like

1222
00:59:21,560 --> 00:59:24,160
Speaker 2: looked over, like this pitch is really my friend, and

1223
00:59:24,200 --> 00:59:26,680
Speaker 2: there was no judgment, there was no questions, and like

1224
00:59:26,720 --> 00:59:28,000
Speaker 2: I was like, you could just let you could just

1225
00:59:28,080 --> 00:59:29,479
Speaker 2: let me out here, and You're like, no, I'm gonna

1226
00:59:29,480 --> 00:59:29,720
Speaker 2: come in.

1227
00:59:29,760 --> 00:59:34,000
Speaker 4: And I was like, okay, I just leave you there.

1228
00:59:34,320 --> 00:59:36,800
Speaker 2: And the lobby like I'm fucking fifteen, and the fucking

1229
00:59:37,040 --> 00:59:40,320
Speaker 2: playing parahead. But I didn't even if though I wanted

1230
00:59:40,360 --> 00:59:42,800
Speaker 2: to get out of the car and deal with it myself.

1231
00:59:42,720 --> 00:59:45,240
Speaker 4: You didn't let me. And I needed that, you know.

1232
00:59:45,320 --> 00:59:46,240
Speaker 1: I really needed.

1233
00:59:45,960 --> 00:59:48,440
Speaker 2: Someone to be like, even if you don't ask for it,

1234
00:59:49,600 --> 00:59:52,720
Speaker 2: so emotional, even if you don't ask for it, I'm

1235
00:59:52,720 --> 00:59:53,760
Speaker 2: gonna be here, you know.

1236
00:59:53,960 --> 00:59:56,880
Speaker 4: And I think that's the difference. I think as women,

1237
00:59:58,080 --> 00:59:59,120
Speaker 4: especially as Black.

1238
00:59:58,920 --> 01:00:01,880
Speaker 2: Women, you've and so strong and you've dealt with shit

1239
01:00:01,960 --> 01:00:02,600
Speaker 2: by yourself.

1240
01:00:02,760 --> 01:00:04,760
Speaker 4: It's like I got this.

1241
01:00:04,960 --> 01:00:07,600
Speaker 2: But when someone is like you got it, but I'm

1242
01:00:07,640 --> 01:00:12,160
Speaker 2: here still, those are the shifting points. And I think

1243
01:00:12,600 --> 01:00:14,760
Speaker 2: because we are so strong, because we deal with shit

1244
01:00:14,920 --> 01:00:19,040
Speaker 2: so often alone or we're programmed in this like hyper

1245
01:00:19,040 --> 01:00:22,160
Speaker 2: independence that we don't expect it and so when we

1246
01:00:22,440 --> 01:00:25,240
Speaker 2: don't know how to receive it. And so I think

1247
01:00:25,280 --> 01:00:28,720
Speaker 2: this relationship has really allowed me to take inventory of

1248
01:00:28,760 --> 01:00:31,840
Speaker 2: that and then receive it and then also be like,

1249
01:00:31,960 --> 01:00:34,040
Speaker 2: you can do it, but you don't have to, you know.

1250
01:00:34,120 --> 01:00:35,960
Speaker 2: And those are the type of friendships I think that

1251
01:00:36,800 --> 01:00:40,480
Speaker 2: are divine and that are you know, life changing, And

1252
01:00:40,520 --> 01:00:42,400
Speaker 2: this has been a life changing relationship.

1253
01:00:42,520 --> 01:00:48,160
Speaker 4: And we've come up on some magical fucking I don't know,

1254
01:00:48,280 --> 01:00:51,760
Speaker 4: like I don't know what the fuck, I'm a bird,

1255
01:00:51,840 --> 01:00:56,040
Speaker 4: I'm like fucking gem, you know, some treasure that has

1256
01:00:58,080 --> 01:00:58,920
Speaker 4: has like.

1257
01:01:00,640 --> 01:01:04,200
Speaker 2: Allowed us to rebirth in this phoenix M S E

1258
01:01:04,400 --> 01:01:07,440
Speaker 2: with each other, you know. And I think that women

1259
01:01:07,840 --> 01:01:14,480
Speaker 2: really have the the ability to do that for each other, right,

1260
01:01:14,680 --> 01:01:17,960
Speaker 2: we are so magical we birth people. And so when

1261
01:01:18,000 --> 01:01:21,760
Speaker 2: we bring that magic and you know that co creation,

1262
01:01:22,520 --> 01:01:25,720
Speaker 2: that sex energy without the sex, you guys, you know

1263
01:01:26,160 --> 01:01:30,200
Speaker 2: that creative energy, then something really magical and powerful can

1264
01:01:30,240 --> 01:01:33,360
Speaker 2: be exchanged and be created. And I think we are

1265
01:01:33,960 --> 01:01:37,240
Speaker 2: a living proof of that, you know. And s like

1266
01:01:37,320 --> 01:01:39,760
Speaker 2: literally cook some shit up in the kitchen and here

1267
01:01:39,800 --> 01:01:40,120
Speaker 2: we are.

1268
01:01:41,160 --> 01:01:44,480
Speaker 4: So yeah, that eighty twenty. Shit is real.

1269
01:01:44,800 --> 01:01:46,840
Speaker 1: Yeah, I think it is too. And I think about just.

1270
01:01:49,320 --> 01:01:52,240
Speaker 3: Even my friends outside, like my friends outside of this

1271
01:01:52,320 --> 01:01:53,680
Speaker 3: are also your friends outside of this.

1272
01:01:54,240 --> 01:01:56,040
Speaker 1: But I even I even.

1273
01:01:55,960 --> 01:01:58,600
Speaker 3: Like, I'm like, damn, I'm blessed because it's I got

1274
01:01:58,640 --> 01:02:04,560
Speaker 3: like it's more like forty sixty uh for me, Like

1275
01:02:04,600 --> 01:02:07,280
Speaker 3: I have a very solid, beautiful group of friends that

1276
01:02:07,320 --> 01:02:09,440
Speaker 3: I know that I can rely on for different things

1277
01:02:09,480 --> 01:02:12,320
Speaker 3: and and also everything too at the same time, like

1278
01:02:12,360 --> 01:02:15,760
Speaker 3: I know which friend is am is maybe more gifted

1279
01:02:15,760 --> 01:02:17,800
Speaker 3: in supporting me in this way or that way or

1280
01:02:17,840 --> 01:02:20,960
Speaker 3: this way, but ultimately, each and every one of them,

1281
01:02:21,040 --> 01:02:23,280
Speaker 3: the ones I really choose to call my friends and sisters,

1282
01:02:23,320 --> 01:02:26,320
Speaker 3: are going to to show up for me no matter what. Absolutely,

1283
01:02:26,520 --> 01:02:30,480
Speaker 3: you know. And I realize how I know how where

1284
01:02:30,600 --> 01:02:34,840
Speaker 3: that is, I know how how isolating it is, and

1285
01:02:34,880 --> 01:02:36,920
Speaker 3: I know that because of so many people that well,

1286
01:02:36,960 --> 01:02:39,400
Speaker 3: I know because myself, I mean, I've I've I've always

1287
01:02:39,480 --> 01:02:41,400
Speaker 3: had a a s a group of friends.

1288
01:02:41,480 --> 01:02:42,840
Speaker 1: But it wasn't until I had.

1289
01:02:42,680 --> 01:02:44,840
Speaker 3: My daughter that I realized I didn't have I was

1290
01:02:44,880 --> 01:02:49,560
Speaker 3: more leaning on like the ten ninety and and then

1291
01:02:49,920 --> 01:02:52,400
Speaker 3: just within this work and talking to so many women

1292
01:02:52,600 --> 01:02:55,000
Speaker 3: and then beying like I ain't got nobody, Like I

1293
01:02:55,080 --> 01:02:59,440
Speaker 3: don't even know where to begin, and so I think, like, uh,

1294
01:02:59,480 --> 01:03:02,200
Speaker 3: what the beauty full thing that our entity has created

1295
01:03:02,320 --> 01:03:07,040
Speaker 3: has been this birthing of a community where women who

1296
01:03:07,080 --> 01:03:11,120
Speaker 3: don't have friends can find each other. And it does

1297
01:03:11,200 --> 01:03:13,680
Speaker 3: require you to get uncomfortable. It does require and you

1298
01:03:13,760 --> 01:03:19,080
Speaker 3: go out on a limb. It may not be like seamless.

1299
01:03:19,080 --> 01:03:20,920
Speaker 3: You may not just find your bestie walking down the

1300
01:03:20,920 --> 01:03:22,600
Speaker 3: street and that's your fucking storyline.

1301
01:03:22,680 --> 01:03:25,400
Speaker 1: Like, no, you might have to really nurture that relationship.

1302
01:03:26,520 --> 01:03:29,640
Speaker 1: And that brings me to my last statistic.

1303
01:03:30,080 --> 01:03:31,080
Speaker 4: Kind of statistic queen.

1304
01:03:31,880 --> 01:03:35,760
Speaker 3: It takes about eleven different encounters that are that are

1305
01:03:36,360 --> 01:03:40,240
Speaker 3: each three hours long over a period of six months

1306
01:03:40,320 --> 01:03:43,840
Speaker 3: to turn an acquaintance into a real friend.

1307
01:03:43,840 --> 01:03:44,479
Speaker 4: That makes sense.

1308
01:03:44,760 --> 01:03:50,040
Speaker 2: I think by the time, like between March and shit August,

1309
01:03:50,160 --> 01:03:53,880
Speaker 2: it's just when like I got that abortion. We when

1310
01:03:53,880 --> 01:03:56,120
Speaker 2: we started the podcast, we probably had not spent three

1311
01:03:56,160 --> 01:04:02,120
Speaker 2: hours consecutively together, do you think so that first episode.

1312
01:04:02,720 --> 01:04:05,440
Speaker 4: Was probably the beginning, the beginning of us spending.

1313
01:04:05,640 --> 01:04:07,760
Speaker 2: That may have been our second time spending three hours together.

1314
01:04:08,120 --> 01:04:10,440
Speaker 2: In the first two were photo shooting in a shopping.

1315
01:04:11,120 --> 01:04:12,080
Speaker 1: I'm not joking like that.

1316
01:04:12,640 --> 01:04:14,120
Speaker 2: I'm probably the one time I went to the club,

1317
01:04:14,160 --> 01:04:17,440
Speaker 2: but that doesn't count when we're talking, right, But honestly,

1318
01:04:17,720 --> 01:04:21,440
Speaker 2: you know, though, like this this exact space.

1319
01:04:21,200 --> 01:04:22,640
Speaker 4: You know, obviously not physically here.

1320
01:04:22,680 --> 01:04:26,960
Speaker 2: But good Mom's bad choices were the three hour conversations

1321
01:04:26,960 --> 01:04:31,720
Speaker 2: over a six month period that took our relationship from

1322
01:04:32,320 --> 01:04:36,000
Speaker 2: zero to best friends quickly. And you know, I have

1323
01:04:36,000 --> 01:04:38,560
Speaker 2: other friends who just like started texting me a lot

1324
01:04:38,640 --> 01:04:40,160
Speaker 2: their business and I was like, oh, okay, I guess

1325
01:04:40,160 --> 01:04:41,040
Speaker 2: for friends.

1326
01:04:40,720 --> 01:04:42,200
Speaker 4: You know, and I'm that type of bitch.

1327
01:04:42,760 --> 01:04:45,480
Speaker 2: But I realized that women have a hard time being vulnerable,

1328
01:04:46,000 --> 01:04:49,120
Speaker 2: and women have a hard time like I think, you know,

1329
01:04:49,200 --> 01:04:51,040
Speaker 2: I say for black women a lot because I'm a

1330
01:04:51,040 --> 01:04:51,520
Speaker 2: black woman.

1331
01:04:51,600 --> 01:04:53,680
Speaker 4: It's all I know, it's the only experience I have.

1332
01:04:54,320 --> 01:04:56,959
Speaker 2: But we've also been very much conditioned to like, don't

1333
01:04:57,000 --> 01:04:59,880
Speaker 2: tell your business and to show up a certain way

1334
01:05:00,040 --> 01:05:02,600
Speaker 2: and too like our shit has to be together, you

1335
01:05:02,600 --> 01:05:04,160
Speaker 2: know what I mean. And there's been times in our

1336
01:05:04,200 --> 01:05:08,440
Speaker 2: relationship where, like I knew we were dealing in different realms,

1337
01:05:08,480 --> 01:05:10,920
Speaker 2: but I still felt comfortable enough to tell you, like

1338
01:05:10,960 --> 01:05:12,920
Speaker 2: my car got repossessed in front of Erica's house, and

1339
01:05:12,920 --> 01:05:15,320
Speaker 2: I was embarrassed, but I didn't this is where I

1340
01:05:15,400 --> 01:05:18,000
Speaker 2: was at, and I had a friend who wasn't gonna

1341
01:05:18,080 --> 01:05:21,360
Speaker 2: judge me or and I felt embarrassed and I felt ways,

1342
01:05:21,400 --> 01:05:24,400
Speaker 2: but it wasn't like it. It's never been judgment. It's like,

1343
01:05:24,400 --> 01:05:26,600
Speaker 2: oh I got pregnant by this dumbass guy. It's never

1344
01:05:26,640 --> 01:05:28,560
Speaker 2: been judgment. It's like, what are we gonna do? And

1345
01:05:28,600 --> 01:05:32,240
Speaker 2: how are we gonna how are we gonna heal you?

1346
01:05:31,840 --> 01:05:33,600
Speaker 4: You know? What can I do for you?

1347
01:05:33,920 --> 01:05:37,080
Speaker 2: And I think that we fuck ourselves a lot not

1348
01:05:37,160 --> 01:05:39,880
Speaker 2: being able to show up as ourselves, you know, vulnerable,

1349
01:05:39,960 --> 01:05:40,520
Speaker 2: fucked up.

1350
01:05:41,040 --> 01:05:43,920
Speaker 4: Sometimes it's not beautiful. And I'm one of those people.

1351
01:05:43,720 --> 01:05:46,080
Speaker 2: Who really wants to present is everything is okay, because

1352
01:05:46,120 --> 01:05:48,760
Speaker 2: I don't want too much of your attention because I

1353
01:05:48,760 --> 01:05:51,240
Speaker 2: think it's weird and I can deal with it by myself.

1354
01:05:51,640 --> 01:05:53,840
Speaker 2: But it does require that you kind of let go

1355
01:05:53,920 --> 01:05:57,840
Speaker 2: of that perfection, Like perfection isn't in order to be

1356
01:05:57,960 --> 01:05:59,680
Speaker 2: vulnerable in a friendship in a real way.

1357
01:06:00,120 --> 01:06:03,520
Speaker 4: Not yeah, yeah, because we all have some shit you have.

1358
01:06:03,480 --> 01:06:04,240
Speaker 1: To you have to do.

1359
01:06:04,280 --> 01:06:07,680
Speaker 3: If you if you really say you want the friendship

1360
01:06:07,800 --> 01:06:11,360
Speaker 3: or the friend group that you desire, there is a

1361
01:06:11,440 --> 01:06:13,960
Speaker 3: disarming that has to happen or else you can just

1362
01:06:14,000 --> 01:06:15,680
Speaker 3: have a bunch of you can just have a bunch

1363
01:06:15,680 --> 01:06:18,080
Speaker 3: of eighty friends and you be in that group too.

1364
01:06:18,120 --> 01:06:19,960
Speaker 3: You're gonna be the eighty friend to a lot of bitches,

1365
01:06:20,000 --> 01:06:20,520
Speaker 3: and you won't.

1366
01:06:20,640 --> 01:06:22,560
Speaker 1: You won't. You're not even part of the twenty percent.

1367
01:06:22,600 --> 01:06:24,920
Speaker 2: But then when you actually need somebody you have, you

1368
01:06:25,160 --> 01:06:27,440
Speaker 2: won't even feel comfortable calling any of those bitches, right,

1369
01:06:28,040 --> 01:06:31,600
Speaker 2: And that is that's of all of the things that

1370
01:06:31,640 --> 01:06:36,400
Speaker 2: we've that we've cultivated, Like, our friendship is my most

1371
01:06:36,480 --> 01:06:39,600
Speaker 2: proud like the thing I'm most proud of, and like

1372
01:06:39,640 --> 01:06:42,440
Speaker 2: it really is a marriage, you know, it really is

1373
01:06:42,480 --> 01:06:47,200
Speaker 2: a marriage. Like we've put in the work and we

1374
01:06:47,280 --> 01:06:52,160
Speaker 2: are constantly finding new ways to better our friendship so

1375
01:06:52,200 --> 01:06:55,800
Speaker 2: that we can keep doing the work for the community.

1376
01:06:57,760 --> 01:07:02,919
Speaker 3: So yeah, well that's cheers to that you don't barely

1377
01:07:02,960 --> 01:07:03,760
Speaker 3: have nothing to dream.

1378
01:07:03,800 --> 01:07:07,160
Speaker 2: I don't know, I mean, I guess cheers to forever

1379
01:07:07,280 --> 01:07:11,800
Speaker 2: friendship and to being vulnerable in them and sharing the

1380
01:07:11,920 --> 01:07:15,080
Speaker 2: message of sisterhood.

1381
01:07:19,640 --> 01:07:23,480
Speaker 4: So I brought couples.

1382
01:07:24,680 --> 01:07:29,000
Speaker 2: We're not really strangers because we're a couple. Actually, they're

1383
01:07:29,040 --> 01:07:33,760
Speaker 2: sending us some stuff. Yeah, send us some money.

1384
01:07:34,840 --> 01:07:37,160
Speaker 4: What have you been extra sensitive too lately?

1385
01:07:42,040 --> 01:07:56,560
Speaker 13: What have I been extra sensitive too lately? M Because

1386
01:07:56,560 --> 01:07:58,440
Speaker 13: the same should have always sends it up about.

1387
01:08:01,040 --> 01:08:02,360
Speaker 4: Which is I.

1388
01:08:02,560 --> 01:08:04,280
Speaker 1: I think I'm very sensitive.

1389
01:08:03,880 --> 01:08:07,240
Speaker 3: About how I parent and like how I show up

1390
01:08:07,280 --> 01:08:10,360
Speaker 3: as a parent. Really Yeah, when people have opinions like

1391
01:08:10,600 --> 01:08:19,320
Speaker 3: my mom, I think I'm also been extra sensitive to touch,

1392
01:08:19,800 --> 01:08:23,240
Speaker 3: physical touch. I think because I I mean, I'm I'm

1393
01:08:23,280 --> 01:08:25,840
Speaker 3: a touchy type of bitch anyway with.

1394
01:08:25,280 --> 01:08:27,400
Speaker 1: With men, not so much women, which I'm not like,

1395
01:08:27,439 --> 01:08:33,240
Speaker 1: I'm always trying to work on why are you laughing?

1396
01:08:33,320 --> 01:08:34,080
Speaker 1: Why are you laughing?

1397
01:08:34,080 --> 01:08:34,640
Speaker 7: Everything?

1398
01:08:35,040 --> 01:08:42,880
Speaker 3: With women, I feel very I think my heart is

1399
01:08:43,000 --> 01:08:43,639
Speaker 3: very sensitive.

1400
01:08:43,640 --> 01:08:44,559
Speaker 1: It's very sensitive.

1401
01:08:44,600 --> 01:08:48,000
Speaker 3: It's very open because after my last relationship, I told myself,

1402
01:08:48,000 --> 01:08:51,160
Speaker 3: I'm not like closing myself off and I wasn't going

1403
01:08:51,200 --> 01:08:53,200
Speaker 3: to like harden myself. And that was also the message

1404
01:08:53,200 --> 01:08:54,840
Speaker 3: I got last year when I also tried to I

1405
01:08:56,400 --> 01:08:58,880
Speaker 3: was like, I'm not you should I should have Yeah,

1406
01:08:58,880 --> 01:09:00,360
Speaker 3: And I did it, and then I got the voice

1407
01:09:00,400 --> 01:09:01,960
Speaker 3: and the voice told me that your lesson is not over.

1408
01:09:02,000 --> 01:09:03,479
Speaker 1: And then I went back and then I was like, Okay,

1409
01:09:03,479 --> 01:09:06,240
Speaker 1: you got it, lesson is received.

1410
01:09:06,560 --> 01:09:08,880
Speaker 4: Got it? We had it eleven months later got it.

1411
01:09:09,000 --> 01:09:09,439
Speaker 4: We got it.

1412
01:09:09,439 --> 01:09:10,280
Speaker 1: It was really important.

1413
01:09:10,680 --> 01:09:11,680
Speaker 4: It was it was.

1414
01:09:14,160 --> 01:09:18,320
Speaker 3: I think I'm just very sensitive to energy in general.

1415
01:09:18,600 --> 01:09:22,519
Speaker 3: So I feel like I can feel people's energy even

1416
01:09:22,600 --> 01:09:24,960
Speaker 3: more so than before. And like the other day, Mela

1417
01:09:24,960 --> 01:09:26,760
Speaker 3: asked me if I'm an mpath and I like took

1418
01:09:26,760 --> 01:09:28,720
Speaker 3: a very long time to answer, and then she was like, well,

1419
01:09:28,720 --> 01:09:32,599
Speaker 3: you're not, bitch, and I was like, but I think

1420
01:09:32,640 --> 01:09:34,840
Speaker 3: I am. And I think there's a spectrum of like

1421
01:09:35,280 --> 01:09:38,680
Speaker 3: what empathy looks like for people and how deeply impacted

1422
01:09:38,680 --> 01:09:42,479
Speaker 3: you are by people's energy, and mine is mine shows

1423
01:09:42,520 --> 01:09:45,120
Speaker 3: up differently, Like some people cry very easily right like,

1424
01:09:45,400 --> 01:09:48,000
Speaker 3: and I can tell me I can and I can cry.

1425
01:09:48,080 --> 01:09:50,479
Speaker 1: I can cry easily too, depending on what it is,

1426
01:09:50,560 --> 01:09:51,000
Speaker 1: but we can.

1427
01:09:51,600 --> 01:09:54,320
Speaker 3: But I think, just in general right now, I feel

1428
01:09:54,320 --> 01:09:56,280
Speaker 3: like just very sensitive to.

1429
01:09:58,120 --> 01:09:59,759
Speaker 1: Energy and people overall.

1430
01:10:00,400 --> 01:10:03,880
Speaker 2: What about you, Uh, yeah, I am always sensitive to

1431
01:10:04,000 --> 01:10:04,759
Speaker 2: energy and people.

1432
01:10:04,800 --> 01:10:09,920
Speaker 4: But yeah, I think that I am hyper sensitive. But

1433
01:10:09,960 --> 01:10:13,960
Speaker 4: I think I'm really sensitive to myself.

1434
01:10:14,920 --> 01:10:18,639
Speaker 2: Where as I'm like on this deep investigative journey into

1435
01:10:18,920 --> 01:10:21,160
Speaker 2: why I am the way I am and how I

1436
01:10:21,240 --> 01:10:25,800
Speaker 2: show up and being really conscious of the thoughts that

1437
01:10:25,880 --> 01:10:28,600
Speaker 2: I have and honestly like like I've said this to you,

1438
01:10:28,680 --> 01:10:31,520
Speaker 2: like even thoughts like about you or in a relationship,

1439
01:10:31,600 --> 01:10:33,519
Speaker 2: or think you're mad at me, or even just like

1440
01:10:33,600 --> 01:10:37,719
Speaker 2: how I respond to situations, and like I think then.

1441
01:10:37,760 --> 01:10:40,320
Speaker 4: It's been I'm I'm sensitive to it because now I'm

1442
01:10:40,360 --> 01:10:41,639
Speaker 4: it's time to do this work.

1443
01:10:41,680 --> 01:10:43,760
Speaker 2: But I think it's also like the hardest work I've

1444
01:10:43,800 --> 01:10:47,880
Speaker 2: ever had to do, not changing myself, but being open

1445
01:10:48,120 --> 01:10:51,080
Speaker 2: to change about how I show up and even my

1446
01:10:51,160 --> 01:10:55,160
Speaker 2: thought process and like, you know, recognizing when thoughts are

1447
01:10:55,200 --> 01:10:57,920
Speaker 2: negative or and like or I'm feeling jealousy, you know,

1448
01:10:57,960 --> 01:10:59,639
Speaker 2: and then I'm like that you need to do air element,

1449
01:10:59,760 --> 01:11:02,320
Speaker 2: you know, Like I had this crazy it's so ridiculous.

1450
01:11:02,360 --> 01:11:04,240
Speaker 2: I don't want to admit it and out loud. It

1451
01:11:04,320 --> 01:11:08,720
Speaker 2: was so dumb. But immediately I was like, bitch, you

1452
01:11:08,760 --> 01:11:10,559
Speaker 2: need to do your own limit, like you need to

1453
01:11:10,560 --> 01:11:13,400
Speaker 2: sit down. And it helped, you know, but it was

1454
01:11:13,479 --> 01:11:18,120
Speaker 2: just like a ridiculous thought. It was very childish and.

1455
01:11:18,560 --> 01:11:20,519
Speaker 4: I had to check myself. And so I just think

1456
01:11:20,560 --> 01:11:22,640
Speaker 4: that I'm in this this space where I was.

1457
01:11:22,640 --> 01:11:24,040
Speaker 2: Like, I don't know if you're hanging out with somebody,

1458
01:11:24,080 --> 01:11:26,880
Speaker 2: and I was like, jealousy, it's me poor.

1459
01:11:27,880 --> 01:11:31,559
Speaker 4: It was stupid. It was like the last few weeks,

1460
01:11:32,360 --> 01:11:35,760
Speaker 4: but I had to like check it, you know what

1461
01:11:35,800 --> 01:11:37,479
Speaker 4: I mean, Like where is this coming from?

1462
01:11:37,479 --> 01:11:40,360
Speaker 2: Like you it's literally made up, and just just being

1463
01:11:40,400 --> 01:11:41,639
Speaker 2: cognizant of that, you know.

1464
01:11:41,640 --> 01:11:43,639
Speaker 4: And just like all those things. So I think.

1465
01:11:45,320 --> 01:11:46,480
Speaker 1: She was jealous.

1466
01:11:48,400 --> 01:11:50,000
Speaker 4: For not the bitch I spent every week in a

1467
01:11:50,080 --> 01:11:56,240
Speaker 4: moment with Psycho. But yeah, this really extra sensitive about

1468
01:11:56,560 --> 01:11:59,880
Speaker 4: me lately, and like how I show up and who

1469
01:11:59,880 --> 01:12:02,559
Speaker 4: I am, my tru.

1470
01:12:05,439 --> 01:12:07,280
Speaker 3: What's something we used to do at the beginning of

1471
01:12:07,280 --> 01:12:09,920
Speaker 3: our l What is something we used to do at

1472
01:12:09,920 --> 01:12:12,719
Speaker 3: the beginning of our relationship that you miss the most?

1473
01:12:13,280 --> 01:12:16,839
Speaker 4: I picked up. Yeah, I don't think we do anything

1474
01:12:17,080 --> 01:12:24,400
Speaker 4: but nothing. It's never happening again.

1475
01:12:25,439 --> 01:12:30,679
Speaker 1: M I guess hang out alone, hang out by ourselves more.

1476
01:12:31,000 --> 01:12:32,680
Speaker 3: I think like when we hang out there's always a

1477
01:12:32,680 --> 01:12:33,559
Speaker 3: lot of people around.

1478
01:12:34,080 --> 01:12:35,120
Speaker 1: It's either like we're.

1479
01:12:35,000 --> 01:12:37,160
Speaker 3: With our group of friends, or we're working, or there's

1480
01:12:37,280 --> 01:12:41,640
Speaker 3: someone behind the camera or Orlando's there or whatever. It is, Like,

1481
01:12:41,680 --> 01:12:45,840
Speaker 3: I think that I miss hanging out with you one.

1482
01:12:45,720 --> 01:12:46,360
Speaker 4: On one more.

1483
01:12:46,840 --> 01:12:49,599
Speaker 2: Yeah, I was gonna say working, I mean not working out,

1484
01:12:49,880 --> 01:12:53,439
Speaker 2: hanging out without being work related or not having to

1485
01:12:53,479 --> 01:12:56,599
Speaker 2: talk about anything. Work related, like I'm not doing nothing

1486
01:12:56,680 --> 01:12:59,519
Speaker 2: but kind of yeah, kind of, you know, because there

1487
01:12:59,560 --> 01:13:02,320
Speaker 2: was a time we're like, we're just doing this when

1488
01:13:02,360 --> 01:13:03,760
Speaker 2: it was time to do this, and then we just

1489
01:13:03,760 --> 01:13:04,200
Speaker 2: hang out.

1490
01:13:04,360 --> 01:13:07,120
Speaker 4: But now it's like everything and revolves.

1491
01:13:06,600 --> 01:13:09,120
Speaker 2: Around this machine that we've created and like how it

1492
01:13:09,160 --> 01:13:10,800
Speaker 2: can improve and how it can be better, and how

1493
01:13:10,800 --> 01:13:11,280
Speaker 2: we can make.

1494
01:13:11,200 --> 01:13:13,240
Speaker 4: More money and like are we making money yet?

1495
01:13:13,680 --> 01:13:17,040
Speaker 1: No? No, no, no, you.

1496
01:13:17,000 --> 01:13:18,720
Speaker 2: Know, I never paying you know, And it's just like

1497
01:13:20,040 --> 01:13:24,160
Speaker 2: a consciousness that has overtaken, not overtaken the friendship because

1498
01:13:24,160 --> 01:13:29,439
Speaker 2: it's so deeply tied together. But yeah, like where we

1499
01:13:29,479 --> 01:13:36,040
Speaker 2: can just kind of decompress and separate these two things,

1500
01:13:36,800 --> 01:13:39,240
Speaker 2: which is difficult because our friendship is our business and

1501
01:13:39,320 --> 01:13:39,920
Speaker 2: vice versa.

1502
01:13:40,000 --> 01:13:45,080
Speaker 4: But yeah, like just being in the backyard naked, smoking weed, doing.

1503
01:13:44,840 --> 01:13:46,600
Speaker 1: Nothing bringing into more of that.

1504
01:13:46,960 --> 01:13:49,479
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, well summer's coming.

1505
01:13:51,320 --> 01:13:52,080
Speaker 4: Okay, one more?

1506
01:13:55,080 --> 01:13:58,240
Speaker 2: In what ways is this relationship unlike any other before?

1507
01:14:00,720 --> 01:14:02,559
Speaker 1: It's so many ways.

1508
01:14:02,960 --> 01:14:05,480
Speaker 4: Yeah.

1509
01:14:05,560 --> 01:14:08,360
Speaker 3: Uh. I think the level of like vulnerability I've been

1510
01:14:08,400 --> 01:14:10,920
Speaker 3: able to that's been able to exist in this I

1511
01:14:10,960 --> 01:14:13,400
Speaker 3: think also just and and vulnerability even in like my

1512
01:14:13,439 --> 01:14:16,360
Speaker 3: deepest insecurity is about our relationship and being able to

1513
01:14:16,400 --> 01:14:21,080
Speaker 3: say that out loud to you and on multiple occasions,

1514
01:14:21,360 --> 01:14:25,280
Speaker 3: and probably I could do it even more honestly, And

1515
01:14:25,360 --> 01:14:30,400
Speaker 3: so I think, like I've never experienced that with a woman.

1516
01:14:30,960 --> 01:14:33,080
Speaker 3: I might've experienced that with a man because women were

1517
01:14:33,120 --> 01:14:35,160
Speaker 3: really good at telling me cause how we feel, but

1518
01:14:35,400 --> 01:14:38,320
Speaker 3: with women, we don't really do that. And so I

1519
01:14:38,320 --> 01:14:40,479
Speaker 3: would say that like being able to do that, I

1520
01:14:40,520 --> 01:14:41,480
Speaker 3: think also.

1521
01:14:44,760 --> 01:14:47,240
Speaker 1: Being naked a lot, because I.

1522
01:14:47,160 --> 01:14:48,679
Speaker 3: Don't really have a lot of friends that I would've

1523
01:14:48,680 --> 01:14:50,160
Speaker 3: may been able to do that with. I mean, I

1524
01:14:50,160 --> 01:14:52,800
Speaker 3: think I I've always felt pretty comfortable in my body

1525
01:14:52,840 --> 01:14:55,280
Speaker 3: and being naked. I think when that comes from my

1526
01:14:55,320 --> 01:14:57,120
Speaker 3: mom because she was really ni she was mute a

1527
01:14:57,120 --> 01:14:58,800
Speaker 3: lot in the house, even though now she acts like

1528
01:14:58,840 --> 01:15:04,320
Speaker 3: that ever existed. But but there's like, uh, the freedom

1529
01:15:04,520 --> 01:15:09,280
Speaker 3: of like just I think existing in my body is

1530
01:15:09,320 --> 01:15:10,960
Speaker 3: something that I never really got to do with any

1531
01:15:10,960 --> 01:15:13,960
Speaker 3: woman in my life like that, thank you.

1532
01:15:15,680 --> 01:15:18,479
Speaker 2: I think in what ways this relationship is unlike any

1533
01:15:18,479 --> 01:15:19,040
Speaker 2: other before.

1534
01:15:19,080 --> 01:15:20,720
Speaker 4: I think that we have been able to.

1535
01:15:22,920 --> 01:15:27,599
Speaker 2: Yeah, grow together, consciously, healed together, and like be vulnerable

1536
01:15:27,640 --> 01:15:30,519
Speaker 2: about the things that we're healing and where we're at,

1537
01:15:30,760 --> 01:15:34,320
Speaker 2: and also just make the rules, you know, Like we've

1538
01:15:34,400 --> 01:15:36,840
Speaker 2: really made the rules in our relationship and there's been

1539
01:15:36,920 --> 01:15:38,880
Speaker 2: no blueprint, and it's like.

1540
01:15:39,280 --> 01:15:40,400
Speaker 4: You wanna party this guy?

1541
01:15:40,760 --> 01:15:44,960
Speaker 2: Okay, wha party our friend's boyfriend with her permission?

1542
01:15:45,000 --> 01:15:49,760
Speaker 4: Okay you know, and like, oh like just whatever, it is,

1543
01:15:49,800 --> 01:15:51,080
Speaker 4: like you think I should shu?

1544
01:15:51,160 --> 01:15:52,800
Speaker 2: You think we should send this guy a picture of

1545
01:15:52,840 --> 01:15:54,599
Speaker 2: us inner lingerie and see if I'll come on our show.

1546
01:15:55,320 --> 01:15:55,559
Speaker 4: Yeah.

1547
01:15:55,640 --> 01:16:00,920
Speaker 1: Yeah, shout out to band Lathan, Thanks thanks man.

1548
01:16:01,120 --> 01:16:05,040
Speaker 3: I mean wait, not wait, not this being Neila's tactic,

1549
01:16:05,120 --> 01:16:06,120
Speaker 3: because Mila.

1550
01:16:05,920 --> 01:16:07,679
Speaker 1: Was like, we gotta get Kat Williams on our ship.

1551
01:16:08,600 --> 01:16:10,840
Speaker 1: Was like, I have a probably run that tactic back.

1552
01:16:10,840 --> 01:16:12,519
Speaker 4: I said, you think we just send the pictures on lingerie?

1553
01:16:12,560 --> 01:16:14,439
Speaker 4: I think it's too thirsty now. But she was gonna

1554
01:16:14,439 --> 01:16:15,360
Speaker 4: be too thirsty.

1555
01:16:15,240 --> 01:16:19,080
Speaker 2: If worked back in twenty eighteen. Did I don't think

1556
01:16:19,080 --> 01:16:21,360
Speaker 2: I sent? I told Nellie and she was like, no,

1557
01:16:21,840 --> 01:16:23,639
Speaker 2: you can't ask the people. You can't ask old people.

1558
01:16:23,680 --> 01:16:24,639
Speaker 2: You can't they don't understand.

1559
01:16:24,640 --> 01:16:27,559
Speaker 4: No, you got no no, you know, pull pull cat's

1560
01:16:27,600 --> 01:16:28,240
Speaker 4: DMS ups.

1561
01:16:29,840 --> 01:16:30,639
Speaker 1: If anything's on the.

1562
01:16:33,520 --> 01:16:36,200
Speaker 4: Cat is gonna understand the call, just like just like

1563
01:16:36,400 --> 01:16:39,680
Speaker 4: Ban did. Fucking band what is he?

1564
01:16:39,800 --> 01:16:40,880
Speaker 1: Oh my god?

1565
01:16:41,760 --> 01:16:44,639
Speaker 2: But yeah, like just making the rules and just knowing

1566
01:16:44,680 --> 01:16:49,120
Speaker 2: that I can be my full complete cells here, naked

1567
01:16:49,520 --> 01:16:52,120
Speaker 2: titties out, your boyfriend there, your new boyfriend there. I

1568
01:16:52,160 --> 01:16:55,439
Speaker 2: don't care what boyfriend this is, and just like be

1569
01:16:55,720 --> 01:16:58,840
Speaker 2: full blown myself and know that you have my back.

1570
01:16:58,640 --> 01:17:00,679
Speaker 4: And that there's no weird energy.

1571
01:17:03,080 --> 01:17:05,559
Speaker 1: Hey amen, amen Amen.

1572
01:17:08,439 --> 01:17:11,799
Speaker 2: So our males are about to come out because bitches

1573
01:17:11,800 --> 01:17:15,519
Speaker 2: are very hungry now that we've smoked and Erica has

1574
01:17:15,600 --> 01:17:19,960
Speaker 2: been dying, I mean fucking dying Erica and Luna for

1575
01:17:20,040 --> 01:17:23,599
Speaker 2: us to do ASMR and wait side note. That's when

1576
01:17:23,600 --> 01:17:25,240
Speaker 2: I was in the bathtub in Luna and she goes

1577
01:17:26,080 --> 01:17:27,640
Speaker 2: she made me watch ASMR and I was like she

1578
01:17:27,720 --> 01:17:30,280
Speaker 2: whispering the whole time and she's like yeah.

1579
01:17:30,400 --> 01:17:32,760
Speaker 4: So she's like, let's who do you want to watch you?

1580
01:17:32,960 --> 01:17:34,800
Speaker 4: And I was like no, and she puts us in.

1581
01:17:34,880 --> 01:17:37,400
Speaker 4: She goes good Mom's Bad Choices with kids and I

1582
01:17:37,400 --> 01:17:39,639
Speaker 4: was like, no, it's called the forest is a pharmacy. She'said,

1583
01:17:39,680 --> 01:17:41,360
Speaker 4: oh yeah, And then I was like why do you

1584
01:17:41,400 --> 01:17:43,280
Speaker 4: want to watch this? She's like, so you can see

1585
01:17:43,400 --> 01:17:45,960
Speaker 4: like if you mess up. I was like, remain. She

1586
01:17:46,000 --> 01:17:47,559
Speaker 4: was like, you canna see to watch yourself to see

1587
01:17:47,560 --> 01:17:51,320
Speaker 4: if you mess up. She was okay, Well, I was like,

1588
01:17:51,320 --> 01:17:54,000
Speaker 4: but I'm being myself. I don't think I can mess up.

1589
01:17:55,040 --> 01:17:56,479
Speaker 4: And I was like, is she right? Do I need

1590
01:17:56,520 --> 01:17:58,600
Speaker 4: to like watch to see what I do? Weird? Like,

1591
01:17:58,800 --> 01:18:00,639
Speaker 4: you know what it is? You guys do letely honest.

1592
01:18:02,120 --> 01:18:04,559
Speaker 2: I am so and I wouldn't say insecure, but I

1593
01:18:04,600 --> 01:18:08,439
Speaker 2: am so overly conscious that I don't want to watch

1594
01:18:08,439 --> 01:18:10,120
Speaker 2: it at all because I don't want to have any attachment.

1595
01:18:10,120 --> 01:18:12,360
Speaker 2: If I don't like it, I literally just be like

1596
01:18:12,520 --> 01:18:15,000
Speaker 2: it's done. I could have a bookheer in my nose,

1597
01:18:15,000 --> 01:18:16,000
Speaker 2: I could do some Fox up shit.

1598
01:18:16,000 --> 01:18:17,680
Speaker 4: I don't know, I don't know. I'm not having it.

1599
01:18:17,760 --> 01:18:19,680
Speaker 2: I'm not looking at it because I don't like to

1600
01:18:19,760 --> 01:18:21,720
Speaker 2: rewatch and like to we listen. I probably listen to

1601
01:18:22,800 --> 01:18:25,320
Speaker 2: eighteen percent of our episodes in the last six years.

1602
01:18:25,640 --> 01:18:28,519
Speaker 4: But when she said that, I was like, she's smart.

1603
01:18:29,360 --> 01:18:31,280
Speaker 2: I could have been improving the last six years, but

1604
01:18:31,320 --> 01:18:33,719
Speaker 2: I've avoided myself because it's too scary.

1605
01:18:34,160 --> 01:18:36,240
Speaker 4: Not too scary for you, too scary for me.

1606
01:18:37,479 --> 01:18:42,080
Speaker 2: So we finally for Erica, because we are here eating,

1607
01:18:42,680 --> 01:18:46,639
Speaker 2: we are gifting the people which you've always been dying for.

1608
01:18:47,960 --> 01:18:52,519
Speaker 3: Us eating and doing ASMR so if you want to

1609
01:18:52,560 --> 01:18:54,400
Speaker 3: make sure you subscribe to our YouTube channel because we're

1610
01:18:54,439 --> 01:18:58,400
Speaker 3: going to create another channel for ASMR because all my

1611
01:18:58,479 --> 01:19:00,280
Speaker 3: ASMR dreams are finally.

1612
01:19:00,280 --> 01:19:02,639
Speaker 4: But hold your horses. I don't think we're recruiting another channel.

1613
01:19:03,760 --> 01:19:05,880
Speaker 1: Doesn't know it yet, but we're creating a channel.

1614
01:19:06,200 --> 01:19:08,880
Speaker 3: The channel's happening, and it's what's gonna take our YouTube

1615
01:19:08,920 --> 01:19:11,599
Speaker 3: to the next level. Just to fucking wait, just you wait,

1616
01:19:11,960 --> 01:19:14,040
Speaker 3: We're gonna come YouTube fucking stars on the rise.

1617
01:19:14,080 --> 01:19:14,960
Speaker 4: What is that plaque?

1618
01:19:15,040 --> 01:19:16,240
Speaker 1: Yeah, we're gonna be a plaque.

1619
01:19:16,000 --> 01:19:17,880
Speaker 3: That's gonna see a million views and it's gonna be

1620
01:19:18,040 --> 01:19:19,320
Speaker 3: that as Mr video.

1621
01:19:19,160 --> 01:19:22,040
Speaker 1: Of you just lurping on fucking charboiled oysters.

1622
01:19:22,200 --> 01:19:23,880
Speaker 4: It's gonna be like longer nails or something.

1623
01:19:23,920 --> 01:19:28,639
Speaker 2: Okay, anyway, we love you, thank you for sitting through

1624
01:19:28,640 --> 01:19:31,360
Speaker 2: this love fest of Erica, and I remember to love

1625
01:19:31,400 --> 01:19:33,400
Speaker 2: on your friends, Remember to write your friends and love

1626
01:19:33,479 --> 01:19:36,920
Speaker 2: letter order fucking are we really strangers? And get to

1627
01:19:36,920 --> 01:19:39,639
Speaker 2: know your lovers and your wives and your friends better

1628
01:19:40,120 --> 01:19:43,360
Speaker 2: and rate when we view this fucking episode and also

1629
01:19:43,400 --> 01:19:45,800
Speaker 2: download it. I don't know if you know this. We

1630
01:19:45,840 --> 01:19:48,400
Speaker 2: don't get streams unless people are downloading. So it's this

1631
01:19:48,520 --> 01:19:51,640
Speaker 2: is not based on listens. It's based on downloads. So

1632
01:19:51,680 --> 01:19:55,759
Speaker 2: if you haven't downloaded the episode, review it, leave a comment,

1633
01:19:56,120 --> 01:19:59,360
Speaker 2: download it, because that's what actually matters, even if you're

1634
01:19:59,400 --> 01:19:59,960
Speaker 2: the deleted late.

1635
01:20:00,280 --> 01:20:03,160
Speaker 4: Honestly, you know where to find us.

1636
01:20:03,280 --> 01:20:07,519
Speaker 2: Good Moms Underscore back Choices on Instagram, Good Momsbad Choices dot.

1637
01:20:07,320 --> 01:20:09,960
Speaker 4: Com for everything Good Moms. We're coming to a city

1638
01:20:10,040 --> 01:20:11,639
Speaker 4: near you very soon.

1639
01:20:12,080 --> 01:20:15,559
Speaker 2: We have retreats lined up, we have merch, we have

1640
01:20:15,640 --> 01:20:18,120
Speaker 2: good looks, and now we have ASMR.

1641
01:20:18,360 --> 01:20:21,240
Speaker 4: So don't play yourself, treat yourself.

1642
01:20:22,240 --> 01:20:25,120
Speaker 2: Subscribe to our YouTube channel and we'll see you next week.

1643
01:20:25,320 --> 01:20:40,559
Speaker 1: Bye,