Speaker 1: Welcome to Carefully Reckless, the production of Our Heart Radio
Speaker 1: and the Black Effect. I still a nice still aspect,
Speaker 1: I still aspect, nice still ask still still, and I'm
Speaker 1: back with another Carefully Reckless episode. It is your girl,
Speaker 1: just hilarry, guess and listen. I got my sister back.
Speaker 1: I told her she was coming back. Say I'm here again, y'all,
Speaker 1: all right, so listen. She didn't know that I was
Speaker 1: gonna do this, but I usually do story time. And
Speaker 1: then I asked you all questions, and you know, I
Speaker 1: get you all feedback and all that ship, but we're
Speaker 1: gonna jump straight into this right here. I ain't even
Speaker 1: letting her know what the topic is. One day, like
Speaker 1: my sister was dating this guy, right, everything was cool.
Speaker 1: You know. He got close with my niece, my nephew,
Speaker 1: my and the reason why I say I have two nieces,
Speaker 1: but nobody ever gets close to the middle baby. Like
Speaker 1: my middle baby is Zoe. She's two. We ourselves. You
Speaker 1: don't funk with nobody but herself, and that's what it is. Um.
Speaker 1: He got close to my younger, my youngest niece. You know,
Speaker 1: she's very impressionable. She reminds me of myself and Rudy Huxable.
Speaker 1: So like baby Nugget is very just just oh my god,
Speaker 1: that's a kid that you want to be around, like yes,
Speaker 1: like lovy and clingy. Yes. So she actually was really
Speaker 1: really like close with him, like she was cool, and
Speaker 1: he was coming around a lot doing everything, right, I'm
Speaker 1: talking about this nigga was like doing house chores. He
Speaker 1: still had a job and everything, but he would like
Speaker 1: come over to my sister's house and like take care
Speaker 1: of the house and put the kids, help and put
Speaker 1: the kids down and everything right. And we talk about, yeah,
Speaker 1: I'm straight out because yeah, since we we know for
Speaker 1: putting each other out there like that. Um. Yeah. So
Speaker 1: so one particular day and then they were dealing with
Speaker 1: each other for like like months, you know, like this
Speaker 1: was like four like for or five months or five
Speaker 1: months maybe, Yeah, And one particular day, like I got
Speaker 1: close to him, to you, like, I started calling him brother.
Speaker 1: You know how it is when your sister dates or
Speaker 1: your brother dates you, you you adopt the person that
Speaker 1: they're working with, you know what I mean. So I
Speaker 1: was calling them bro. He had called me one day
Speaker 1: and he was like, yo, I have um something serious
Speaker 1: to tell you, and I'm like, yo, what's up? You good?
Speaker 1: You know? And he was like yeah, like it's it's
Speaker 1: not regular, So you need to call me when you
Speaker 1: and I was out somewhere and so I was like,
Speaker 1: he was like, you call me when you're you're away.
Speaker 1: I'm like, yo, and you know what that is. But
Speaker 1: when I feel like somebody got some tea like that,
Speaker 1: like you can't tell me wherever I'm at. I need
Speaker 1: to be sitting down and all that ship. I'm gonna
Speaker 1: leave wherever man, I don't give an Well. I was
Speaker 1: with like a nigger too and something. He had some
Speaker 1: money child, but I said, okay, somethee. So I went
Speaker 1: in the house and um, I called him and he
Speaker 1: before that he texts you remember he had texted you
Speaker 1: because you told him you was busy. He was like
Speaker 1: just text me or something. Yeah, but he was like
Speaker 1: I couln't. I can't text you like this. And I
Speaker 1: told him to call me and I was out, so
Speaker 1: he was like, no, this ain't nothing that I can
Speaker 1: you know what I mean? So I went home and
Speaker 1: I called him and I was like, yo, what's up.
Speaker 1: He was like, I'm gonna call you. Want to get off.
Speaker 1: I'm like, damn, I could have stayed with the nigga.
Speaker 1: So he he ended up calling me later and ship
Speaker 1: and he was like, yo, so I don't know why
Speaker 1: I feel this way. I don't know why I'm even
Speaker 1: this way, but like I have like feelings for niggas,
Speaker 1: like and I'm like saying, you know, he said he
Speaker 1: has a urge urge for yes every once in a while,
Speaker 1: That's what he said. Yeah, so but he texts that. Remember, no,
Speaker 1: he didn't text it right now, Yes he did because
Speaker 1: he had just made the screenshots. Oh, Ship, all right
Speaker 1: with it? Maybe now now, I'm sorry, y'all, this is
Speaker 1: like a good screen how many years ago? This was
Speaker 1: like years and years ago? Okay, all right, so this
Speaker 1: is five years ago, y'all. I'm sorry. You definitely had
Speaker 1: the screenshots. Remember, he was like, oh, she made him up.
Speaker 1: He was like, I don't even feel like like, I
Speaker 1: don't make up screens shots. Now. I might make a
Speaker 1: fake page and and harass your motherer, but I ain't
Speaker 1: gonna make up some screenshots now. I didn't even know
Speaker 1: how to do that back non or whatever. So his
Speaker 1: ass had admitted to me that he was bisexual. You know,
Speaker 1: he said, I just have these feelings for men, but
Speaker 1: not just any men. I have a thing like a
Speaker 1: fetish for trannies. And I'm like what he said, Yeah,
Speaker 1: like I'm attracted the trans and then get dumbass, was like,
Speaker 1: so like you like the ones that had the surgery
Speaker 1: or the ones that still got the dicks? Y? Yeah
Speaker 1: you are you are you attracted the transsexuals or transgender?
Speaker 1: My my mother? You know what I'm saying that he
Speaker 1: was like, he said, he said, um, this nigga gonna
Speaker 1: say if they had the surgery, I might as well
Speaker 1: just be with a woman. He was like, if they
Speaker 1: are transgender, Yeah, like if they had the surgery to
Speaker 1: have a pussy, then that might as well just be
Speaker 1: you know, straight, always straight, and just with a girl.
Speaker 1: And I'm saying with this dumb girl, she's gonna say
Speaker 1: so like what you do with to dick? Like yeah,
Speaker 1: like what do you do? You know? So I'm trying
Speaker 1: to get you know, and this is five years ago.
Speaker 1: I was not as mature as I am now, and
Speaker 1: ship and I you know, and I'm just like yo,
Speaker 1: I mean I just couldn't believe what I was hearing him, Like, Yo,
Speaker 1: my sister's boyfriend is telling that he is attracted to
Speaker 1: men as well as my sister, and I'm just like, yo, okay.
Speaker 1: So after we got past all that, you know, the
Speaker 1: hooplah of it all, I was like, okay, are you
Speaker 1: going to tell her? And he was like, hell yeah yo,
Speaker 1: but I just had to tell you first. I'm like, okay, well,
Speaker 1: what the funk made you tell me and not your
Speaker 1: girlfriend first? You know, he was just like, what the
Speaker 1: funk you mean? That bit should killed me? And listen,
Speaker 1: this ain't only five years later of maturity for me.
Speaker 1: This is five years of whosa for her too, Because
Speaker 1: my sister, of our shade is she used to be
Speaker 1: very temperamental. She was like, you know what I mean,
Speaker 1: it is what it is, Dr Jacko and Mr had Honey,
Speaker 1: that's who she Yes, yes, she definitely I calmed down.
Speaker 1: Was a diagnosed schizophrenic. All right. Only two people lived
Speaker 1: in my band. I thought it was a bunch, but
Speaker 1: you know, because I know more than anybody, and I
Speaker 1: swear as more than two. But you know, she was
Speaker 1: a diagnosed bipolar patient and she would show these you know,
Speaker 1: certain triggers would get her going, and he was afraid
Speaker 1: to tell her, and of course rightfully, so I do understand.
Speaker 1: So I was like, yo, I'm gonna give you some
Speaker 1: time to tell her, because he was just like, Yo,
Speaker 1: I want to tell her, but I'm not gonna tell
Speaker 1: he like tonight, I'm like when you need to tell
Speaker 1: her because you just told her little sister and my
Speaker 1: loyalty is to her. And also, this ain't just ain't
Speaker 1: this ain't no regular ship. You feel me like, are
Speaker 1: you having sex with these you know men? And he's like, yeah,
Speaker 1: I am too. I'm like, yo, because you are having
Speaker 1: sex with my sister. You're in an act of a
Speaker 1: sexually active relationship with my sister, Nigga. This ain't no
Speaker 1: stranger nothing like I don't know her through you, ni,
Speaker 1: I know you through her. So she's the most important
Speaker 1: to me, you know. And so he was honest about everything.
Speaker 1: He was like, yes, I do have sex with men,
Speaker 1: and I'm like, okay, when's the last time? And he
Speaker 1: was like like he started a little bit, like I
Speaker 1: mean like he stopped a little bit, he paused, and
Speaker 1: he didn't want to tell me, but he it was
Speaker 1: more recent than the fund it should have been, you know,
Speaker 1: and it was in the earlier stages of him dating
Speaker 1: my sister, and um, he was telling me like he's
Speaker 1: basically like since he like really really got a fishal
Speaker 1: and realized that he fell in love with my sister,
Speaker 1: that he's tried to fight these urges off. It doesn't work.
Speaker 1: Their research and it's like men all around the world
Speaker 1: that deal with the same thing. Yeah, yeah, and I'm
Speaker 1: just like listening, Yeah, we know that, but I'm responsible
Speaker 1: for my sister. That's it, you know what I'm saying.
Speaker 1: You're not all the men around the world. You're one
Speaker 1: man that's dealing with you know, this problem or you know.
Speaker 1: And it was a problem for him because that's that's why.
Speaker 1: And then the reason why it was a problem for
Speaker 1: me is because you're not giving her a choice. You know,
Speaker 1: you knew you had these feelings from men you knew.
Speaker 1: And although coming out is not an easy process, you're
Speaker 1: still being selfish. Like you're still being selfish, you know,
Speaker 1: and and and always I don't give a funk you're
Speaker 1: being selfish. Um, because she has the right to know
Speaker 1: that she's fucking a guy who Fox guys. So he
Speaker 1: was like, yo, just give me like a day. I said,
Speaker 1: all right, that means You're gonna tell her tomorrow, right,
Speaker 1: And he was like yeah, yeah, yah, yeah, I'm gonna
Speaker 1: telling when I get off tomorrow or whatever. Can you
Speaker 1: be there. I'm like how yeah? He was like yeah,
Speaker 1: because I know she's gonna start swinging, she's gonna go
Speaker 1: to fuck off, she's gonna go crazy. Please. So next
Speaker 1: day came and now imagine me as a little sister,
Speaker 1: like I talked to this girl every fucking day. I'm
Speaker 1: with her all day every day, and it's like, um so,
Speaker 1: now I feel bad because I'm hiding something like but
Speaker 1: I'm not really hiding. I'm waiting for this nigga to
Speaker 1: do what the fun he said he was gonna do
Speaker 1: this nigga gets off work, I'm calling him to see
Speaker 1: what the funk going on? Hain't answering. I called my sister, Hey, Yo,
Speaker 1: is Yo there? She like, no, he ain't come over. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I ain't really talked to him today. Oh why so
Speaker 1: you're chickening out now pretty much? And so I kept
Speaker 1: blowing his sucking phone up, I said yo, And I
Speaker 1: finally text him. I said, Yo, I'm ready to tell him.
Speaker 1: That's when he called me back. He was like, Yo,
Speaker 1: this ship is not easy. I need for you to
Speaker 1: understand you. This ship is not easy. Can I tell
Speaker 1: her tomorrow? What did I let him stow it again?
Speaker 1: Like he was like, no, nigga, like no, like said yeah, yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: I was gonna say. I don't remember if I gave
Speaker 1: him another day, but I definitely gave him that one
Speaker 1: day when he asked me the first time. But it's like, nah, y'all,
Speaker 1: I don't know what the fun going on. So I
Speaker 1: told her, first of all, you begged me not to
Speaker 1: go off, like yo, please do not go off on
Speaker 1: this nigga because he is scared. He is scared of you, like,
Speaker 1: do not go off on him. I'm like, like, I
Speaker 1: ain't gonna go off. I ain't gonna go off. So
Speaker 1: he finally and you thought it was another bit the
Speaker 1: whole time you thought I already telling you something about
Speaker 1: Then you're sitting there saying that. So the maturity and
Speaker 1: meat had to kick in and I had to be like,
Speaker 1: all right, you know what, I can't go off on
Speaker 1: this nigga because I need to. I need to make
Speaker 1: sure his health is good. Yeah that right there, and
Speaker 1: then him saying that he wasn't you know fully protecting himself.
Speaker 1: Did admit. He did admit because I did ask him,
Speaker 1: my bay, y' all. So I asked him, I said, yo, um, now,
Speaker 1: if you just had sex with a guy two or
Speaker 1: three months ago, did you use protection? And he was like,
Speaker 1: that's when I knew. I was like, all right, well no,
Speaker 1: he said, sometimes you do. Sometimes. Yeah, he did tell
Speaker 1: me sometimes you use it, sometimes you know, sometimes you don't.
Speaker 1: But he did admit that he did not use protection
Speaker 1: with that last dude. And so I'm like, yo, what
Speaker 1: the funk? That's what had me upset. So that's why
Speaker 1: he was like, Yo, I'm gonna I promise, I'm gonna
Speaker 1: tell her. I just need you to be there. So
Speaker 1: now back fast forward. I told my sister what the
Speaker 1: fun was happening. She had to collect herself. She really did,
Speaker 1: um like it was that that day. I would never
Speaker 1: forget that day. That day was so heart wrenching for
Speaker 1: her because all the things that are going through her
Speaker 1: mind are just tearing her apart because it's like, yo,
Speaker 1: like she couldn't breathe when I told her, like it
Speaker 1: was just like yo. And then imagine having to tell
Speaker 1: your loved one some ship like that. You know, So
Speaker 1: of course she started blowing up his phone sending the
Speaker 1: messages and ship and he already knew that I told
Speaker 1: her by then. So of course this nigga calls me
Speaker 1: from another phone like, YO, you fucking told her? Remember
Speaker 1: he asked me some type of way. He was like, YO,
Speaker 1: you told her already or something like that, and I
Speaker 1: was like, yeah, yeah, yeah, you didn't, and you were
Speaker 1: fucking ignoring me, Like what the funk you mean? I
Speaker 1: told you I would have to tell her. You could
Speaker 1: have told your little sister. Motherfucker, you told her little sister,
Speaker 1: her girlfriend's little sister. So just imagine the pressure I
Speaker 1: was failing, the position I was put in. And yeah,
Speaker 1: that's how the fun that ship with. I had to
Speaker 1: collect myself before I actually got to like really reach
Speaker 1: out reach out to him. And when I reached out
Speaker 1: to him, I was just like, hey, my sister told me.
Speaker 1: You know what you talked to her about. I ain't
Speaker 1: trying to argue, I ain't trying to fuss. I want
Speaker 1: to come pick you up from working when you get
Speaker 1: all work in the morning. I want us to go
Speaker 1: to the clinic. When is the last time you've been tested?
Speaker 1: I want to see some results. I want to get
Speaker 1: tested together. Even if something is going on with me,
Speaker 1: I won't know, but at least I can see what
Speaker 1: your results is. And I'm going to continue to get
Speaker 1: myself tested, you know you periodically, because that's how it works, exactly.
Speaker 1: It just doesn't show up. It don't show it that
Speaker 1: that ship just won't show up sometime. Yeah, he agreed.
Speaker 1: He agreed to go and get tested with me the
Speaker 1: next morning because he worked overnight. He worked overnight shift,
Speaker 1: and he agreed to go with me. So I go
Speaker 1: to his job because I knew what time he got
Speaker 1: off work, because I've been dealing with him for a
Speaker 1: few months. Um. I went to his job. I'm sitting
Speaker 1: out there in the parking lot. I see people walking
Speaker 1: out and I'm like, well, maybe he ain't. You know,
Speaker 1: he ain't come out yet. So I saw a familiar
Speaker 1: face one of his co workers that I've I've given
Speaker 1: a ride to before, and I'm like, hey, um, such
Speaker 1: and such is he still like that? Oh? He left
Speaker 1: last night? He said he had an emergency. I'm like, oh, worry, okay,
Speaker 1: So I called his phone, go straight to voicemail. I'm blocked.
Speaker 1: I go on Facebook, I'm blocked. I go on Instagram,
Speaker 1: I'm blocked. I'm like, oh sorry. So I made a
Speaker 1: page and it's the first time I ever made just
Speaker 1: a page. I mean, I was famous for doing like
Speaker 1: I mean, and granted I wouldn't say it was a
Speaker 1: fake page. I just made a page real quick, just
Speaker 1: so I could reach out to him, and I told
Speaker 1: him like, hey, like, what's what's uping? Like where you at?
Speaker 1: Like you, I feel like you're trying to duck me out.
Speaker 1: He just like, just just leave me alone. I'm like,
Speaker 1: leave you alone, nigga. We we got obligations, like we
Speaker 1: got to go to to the clinics so we can
Speaker 1: see what's going on. Like now, now you're scaring me
Speaker 1: because I feel like you're trying to hide something, Like
Speaker 1: what then is going on with you? Is this something
Speaker 1: that you know about you that you don't want me
Speaker 1: to know about you? Like what is going on? So
Speaker 1: I'm like, look, he like, leave me alone, Leave me alone.
Speaker 1: I like looking you don't say something like I'm gonna
Speaker 1: put you out there like you Yeah, now you're playing
Speaker 1: with me like a game. I came at you calm,
Speaker 1: I came at you very civilized, I came at you
Speaker 1: like an adult when I really wanted to go off.
Speaker 1: I was so shocked and how you handled it, because like,
Speaker 1: even even though I told him that I wanted to
Speaker 1: be there when he told you, I really didn't because like, honestly,
Speaker 1: she would have sucked both of us up. You understand
Speaker 1: what I'm saying. So like I really wanted was like
Speaker 1: what So that's why I say, yo, like I know
Speaker 1: I would have got nigga. So I was like really
Speaker 1: scared to fucking be there as well. That's why I
Speaker 1: was like, I'm glad I got to tell it, because like, no,
Speaker 1: she would have never forgave me for knowing and just
Speaker 1: not saying anything. Hold up, hold up, I know the
Speaker 1: ship getting good, but listen to just a couple of
Speaker 1: seconds of a commercial. If you love me, you'll listen. Yeah,
Speaker 1: go ahead. Yeah, so you said, um, he was like,
Speaker 1: leave leave me alone, basically like he obviously did not
Speaker 1: want to see what the was going on with him
Speaker 1: if he already didn't know what. Yeah, So I started
Speaker 1: reaching out of the bitches that I knew that he
Speaker 1: didn't sucked in the past. I'm like, hey, you know
Speaker 1: this nigga. Niggas and they're like what. I'm like, look,
Speaker 1: I don't know what you know, but I'm telling you
Speaker 1: this because you know, I want you to get checked
Speaker 1: because I'm gonna go get checked. And y'all was dealing
Speaker 1: with him before I was dealing with him, So like,
Speaker 1: when y'all get checked, let me know what y'all papers say.
Speaker 1: Because I'm new to this. Y'all the been there, like
Speaker 1: I need to know. Like he playing, it became a
Speaker 1: whole situation where he was like, oh, they're lying, they're lying,
Speaker 1: they're lying, and him, Yeah, I got him in a
Speaker 1: Facebook group. Remember the guy that ran the Facebook group?
Speaker 1: Um well, A couple of the guys that ran the
Speaker 1: Facebook was like, um well, she shortly says she got
Speaker 1: receipts talking about you. Shortly says she got receipts. They're
Speaker 1: gonna go live going through her phone. We went live
Speaker 1: going through just and see this is his number right here,
Speaker 1: by bye, this is his number, he's saying right here.
Speaker 1: Sometimes I get the urge to blah blah blah. And
Speaker 1: then you touched on the fact that the transgender that
Speaker 1: used to do your head front she wrew awesome head
Speaker 1: solace and everything like that and he was in her
Speaker 1: damn DNA and she's very popular people, very And it's
Speaker 1: crazy because I actually, and I just I had a
Speaker 1: whole flashback of while him and I would lay in
Speaker 1: my bed one day and I'm like, yo, look at
Speaker 1: this person right here. I showed him um Lucy papers,
Speaker 1: and I was like, I was look at this person,
Speaker 1: and he was like, damn, she looked good. I was
Speaker 1: just like, um, you know, um, you know she she
Speaker 1: was born a boy. He was like what, I can't
Speaker 1: even tell. I was like, I know, she looked good
Speaker 1: at ship. The whole time, he already been following Lucy,
Speaker 1: been following Mercy, and Lucy is a bad you know
Speaker 1: for y'all to know, you know, who bought them? Are
Speaker 1: his own? Like definitely, he already knew who she was.
Speaker 1: He knew who she us and come to find out
Speaker 1: he was following he had a vest selection of trans
Speaker 1: What does it trans? Transgender means that they had this,
Speaker 1: I mean, so, so is it considered? I mean, because
Speaker 1: you know it's it's real specific trans woman and trans man.
Speaker 1: So which would it be trans woman because you're trying
Speaker 1: trying to transition into a woman, would be a trans
Speaker 1: woman okay, And so that's when you first called onto it.
Speaker 1: So after he told you what he told you, then
Speaker 1: I realized that he was following a lot of trans
Speaker 1: woman So that so that, oh so that made you
Speaker 1: think back. You started get back to a lot of ships.
Speaker 1: Remember that time you had told me. He was like,
Speaker 1: oh my god, that explains why he be moaning. He'd
Speaker 1: be like, shame, he shame moaning her name, Like ya
Speaker 1: wanted this dick suck from the bag, Like I ain't
Speaker 1: saying that's gay, but he wanted me to suck his
Speaker 1: dick from the bag, and his but was a little
Speaker 1: hurt and like took my nose almost sneezed at his
Speaker 1: ass like it was my god, and that right would
Speaker 1: it felt real good to him sneezing the ness like
Speaker 1: you know that gust of winding Let you know what
Speaker 1: I mean that probably feeling don't don't go sneeze in
Speaker 1: the n assholes. We were going through the phone and
Speaker 1: then we were fucking quote unquote monsters to everyone. They
Speaker 1: felt like we were being Internet bullies, like we were
Speaker 1: being Internet bullies. Like I'm not being an Internet bully.
Speaker 1: We are not being Internet bullies. I tried to reconcile
Speaker 1: with this man. I tried to get him too. I
Speaker 1: came to him calmly, calm, cool and collected. I came
Speaker 1: to him calm, cool and collect, and I just wanted
Speaker 1: to just get checked out. He did not want to
Speaker 1: get checked out, Like are you scared? Like at this point,
Speaker 1: like now, nigger, I have to put you out there.
Speaker 1: And and he kept telling people I was mine, So
Speaker 1: that made me and I'm like, oh, no, funk, no,
Speaker 1: you know, And like I said, y'all, keep in mind,
Speaker 1: this is five years ago. I was way less mature.
Speaker 1: I was like hitting for the belt, nigger, I mean
Speaker 1: hitting below the belt because this nigga was like really
Speaker 1: acting like he hadn't just told me that. And I'm like, Yo,
Speaker 1: this ship don't even gonna be like this, you motherfucker,
Speaker 1: Why would you do that? Like he had my sister
Speaker 1: fighting behind this ship and everything. He literally I'm sitting
Speaker 1: at this little little restaurant bar lounge that you know,
Speaker 1: it was like like a neighborhood cheers or whatever. I'm
Speaker 1: sitting there. I had these two girls walk up on
Speaker 1: me like hey, you ain't v and I'm like, I
Speaker 1: got a chicken wing in my fing between my fingers,
Speaker 1: like you're sucking it up. I ain't need get a
Speaker 1: chance to suck it up. That was the first wing,
Speaker 1: and they up on me. When I had the first
Speaker 1: wing in my hand, I'm like between my finger you know,
Speaker 1: I love the drumsticks, so I had a little drumstick
Speaker 1: in my hand, like you know, and I'm like, yeah,
Speaker 1: you know, that's that's my name. Like I'm looking at them,
Speaker 1: not sizing them up, but just looking at him, like
Speaker 1: do I know, y'all? Do know? This girl was like
Speaker 1: these these faces were totally unfamiliar. Like the one girl
Speaker 1: was like, yeah, I would drag you, but I like
Speaker 1: coming head. I was like, well, I like coming here too.
Speaker 1: We can go on the park a lot. She was
Speaker 1: a big bitch. I wasn't you woke up to maybe
Speaker 1: like I would like dragging you, but I like coming ahead, bitch,
Speaker 1: So why the fund is you even overhere? Like I
Speaker 1: guess she was trying to be intimidating. I don't want
Speaker 1: to let you know. She did, and like I guess
Speaker 1: trying to trying to scare me. But I'm just like, look,
Speaker 1: we can go. I was like a little bad baby,
Speaker 1: catch me outside there. You girl. And so we went
Speaker 1: outside and like I said, she was big and I
Speaker 1: wasn't that small, and that ship was like a fucking
Speaker 1: I swear it looked like a fucking SMO wrestling match
Speaker 1: or something because it really wasn't even a fight. It
Speaker 1: was like like I hit a few times and I
Speaker 1: guess she was trying to hit me. I don't know
Speaker 1: it was she was drunk. I wasn't. It was. It
Speaker 1: was just a mess. And then I'm sitting there trying
Speaker 1: to figure out, like, why is all of this happening?
Speaker 1: Like at the same time I'm doing all it's like, wait,
Speaker 1: why the fund is this even going on? Why is
Speaker 1: this going on? Come to find out it was him
Speaker 1: that's sent her because he was hiding out at her house. Yeah,
Speaker 1: but remember he had said that ship. Oh I didn't
Speaker 1: know that he was hiding out to her. But remember
Speaker 1: he was like, um, them bitches lying, they're fucking lying.
Speaker 1: There don't know. People get killed for that type of ship.
Speaker 1: That's why I'm gonna have my cousin slapped the shut
Speaker 1: out of Oh. Yeah. He was saying, gonna put money
Speaker 1: on your head, and he was like, nigga, what money?
Speaker 1: You don't even have no fucking money. This is the
Speaker 1: thing all kids and Ship. There's no no more child
Speaker 1: I'm talking about. He was man. We he said, we
Speaker 1: got him put out of his house. He was living
Speaker 1: with one of his homeboys, and Ship. We kept coming
Speaker 1: over there like no, Yo, you need to go to
Speaker 1: the doctor's like you And the bucking cousin was like, Yo,
Speaker 1: look you gotta get the funk out on rom and Yo,
Speaker 1: you you gotta go. I don't know what you got
Speaker 1: going on, nigga saying you're gay and ship, Like I
Speaker 1: don't really even kid if you're gat not you just
Speaker 1: got a lot of drama. I want you out. So
Speaker 1: people go on line and say little shit or you know,
Speaker 1: he would have other people saying ship for him, and
Speaker 1: I'm telling you, I'm like, oh, like where you cannot
Speaker 1: win the internet battle, not with me, not five years ago,
Speaker 1: not now. You can't. You just it's such a class back.
Speaker 1: Just can't do that ship, especially if you line like
Speaker 1: and I got receipts, like, cannot do that, Like Yo,
Speaker 1: it don't even got I kept saying that, like you
Speaker 1: don't even gotta be like they didn't even have to
Speaker 1: be like this, like you fucking lied. You just didn't,
Speaker 1: you know. So all of that ship happened, and then
Speaker 1: this nigga ends up married to that he is married.
Speaker 1: He married this girl I went to school high school with.
Speaker 1: And I asked one of my friends, I'm like, yo,
Speaker 1: he married such and such, Like you think I should
Speaker 1: say something? He was like, I think you just need
Speaker 1: to mind your business because you know, already went through
Speaker 1: enough ship with that situation. And I was just like,
Speaker 1: I'm glad you told me that. I feel like that's
Speaker 1: the best advice you ever gave me, because I felt
Speaker 1: like me and her aren't close or nothing like that,
Speaker 1: but we spoke. We weren't in the same class. She
Speaker 1: was in a class under me, and we and we
Speaker 1: used to be you know, social media friends and stuff
Speaker 1: like that, and I felt like we were, you know,
Speaker 1: cool enough where I could tell her something like that.
Speaker 1: But you know, like my friend that I asked if
Speaker 1: I should tell her. They were just like, you know,
Speaker 1: she may think you hate no, may thank you lying,
Speaker 1: or they think you'll be messy or whatever. So I
Speaker 1: was just like, yeah, I'm glad you said to leave it.
Speaker 1: You don't know, you know, you're not Right're not close
Speaker 1: so she could just think that, you know, because the
Speaker 1: first thing she's gonna do is show him, right, and
Speaker 1: he's gonna tell her what he wants, you know what
Speaker 1: I mean. So and then no times i'd have send
Speaker 1: somebody already told him. And that was a big that
Speaker 1: was big. It was a real big. But then I
Speaker 1: felt like, ohso, like if you weren't in that, even
Speaker 1: though it was big, it was big, and the certain
Speaker 1: it wasn't big like all, it didn't go yeah, it
Speaker 1: wasn't viral or now if you was as big as
Speaker 1: you were, yeah back then now have been yeah, oh yeah,
Speaker 1: if you're saying that, if I was as big as
Speaker 1: I him now back then, then oh yeah, because I
Speaker 1: don't even think I don't even think Tara had recognized
Speaker 1: you yet, because that's when really stuff really started taking
Speaker 1: off of you, when Tara Tara from Love and Hip Hop,
Speaker 1: Yeah yeah, yeah, that's when it was just like, was
Speaker 1: like this girl first started doing just with the mess.
Speaker 1: Yeah I was, and I was only doing it on
Speaker 1: the reality show. I was doing just the Mess on
Speaker 1: reality TV, not all start everything, yeah, not on everything,
Speaker 1: Like it was mainly just literally off the love of
Speaker 1: hip hop. Yeah, yeah, I was, I was, I started
Speaker 1: doing just with the mess, just on love and hip hop. Okay, yeah,
Speaker 1: so yeah damn. So if you can give anybody any
Speaker 1: type of advice or you know, give drop a gym
Speaker 1: to women based off that experience you had, was this
Speaker 1: the nis everywhere? Yo? Yo, I hate you just d
Speaker 1: It's like, no, but now I don't even have any
Speaker 1: advice for the women. I have advice for the men.
Speaker 1: Do not take it upon yourself. Guys, I'm not knocking you.
Speaker 1: If you feel this way. If this is something that
Speaker 1: you like to do, so be it. Let your partner,
Speaker 1: let the woman you're dating, let whoever you're fucking with,
Speaker 1: male or female, let them know. Let it be their
Speaker 1: decision if they want to deal with you. And you
Speaker 1: like to do those things. For motherfucker loves to have
Speaker 1: threesomes and they don't tell me this going into a
Speaker 1: relationship that they love to have threesomes like I don't.
Speaker 1: I don't like to do. So I feel like that's
Speaker 1: something like you need to be upfront with with certain things,
Speaker 1: and that is one thing that you most definitely need
Speaker 1: to be upfront with your sexuality. Sexuality is a big
Speaker 1: piece that you need to be upfront with when dealing
Speaker 1: with someone, when getting to know someone, dating whatever. It
Speaker 1: is a very big piece, a very valuable fact piece
Speaker 1: that needs to be discussed now. If it would have
Speaker 1: been a thing where, you know, with him and I
Speaker 1: started talking, he's just like, oh, you know, Shay. You know,
Speaker 1: every once in a while, I like the I like
Speaker 1: the funk with trains out have been like, Okay, I
Speaker 1: ain't knocking you, but I don't want to deal with
Speaker 1: you because I'm not into that kind of thing. I
Speaker 1: wouldn't have knocked nothing. We could have been cool because
Speaker 1: he was a cool mother. He was a cool dude.
Speaker 1: He really was. He did he had great things about him.
Speaker 1: He was really good with kids. Should have been great.
Speaker 1: And I am just remembering to this day that he
Speaker 1: had a bunch of kids. Yeah, but he was always
Speaker 1: real yours. I know, we never seen his Yeah I've
Speaker 1: seen here a couple of times, but it was I've
Speaker 1: never seen Yeah, it wasn't. I don't think, um, I
Speaker 1: was really around his kids like that because when he
Speaker 1: was around his kids, you know, you know, some people, UM,
Speaker 1: like other baby mothers don't really want the kids around
Speaker 1: other And I get it. I get I'm like, so
Speaker 1: it was just like yeah, I get it, but um, yeah,
Speaker 1: he definitely had um a few I actually um I
Speaker 1: saw him probably like back in because he was um
Speaker 1: when I was. But he still lives next door to
Speaker 1: this guy that um him and his wife lived next
Speaker 1: door to this guy that I was dating, what the fund.
Speaker 1: So he was taking the trash out one day and
Speaker 1: I'm walking up the steps and I look up and
Speaker 1: he looked down and saw me, and he froze up
Speaker 1: like he saw a damn go listen, listen. I've seen
Speaker 1: him at the fucking mall one day. I seen him
Speaker 1: at mom Dumb And this was like like two years
Speaker 1: ago maybe or something like that, like maybe like two
Speaker 1: or three years ago. Minus is like it's abou to
Speaker 1: be yet only too so like yeah, I've seen him
Speaker 1: nineteen or something like that. And he was in a
Speaker 1: moment he like stopped like oh ship, you know how
Speaker 1: like the whole body get hot, and yeah, he froze like,
Speaker 1: oh ship, I know I ain't about to see this bitch.
Speaker 1: I just waved at him like yeah, I was like, hey,
Speaker 1: I dona gave a little white people smile when they
Speaker 1: are talking. Yeah, like and I'm like, all right, move
Speaker 1: on the way. So I walk up the steps tight
Speaker 1: and Ship real sorry, but all right, So did you
Speaker 1: tell the nigga he knew about it? Okay, so he
Speaker 1: didn't know about this, Yeah, he knew about it because
Speaker 1: he happened to see it in that circle. So that
Speaker 1: guy already knew about it. And I was like, yo,
Speaker 1: you ain't telling me. He was like, yeah, I mean
Speaker 1: what you want me to say, right right? Ain't nothing
Speaker 1: that you know he could do with Ship. And I'm
Speaker 1: pretty sure that he's not the only man um that
Speaker 1: is battling you know, his you know, sexuality and you
Speaker 1: know demons that come with and the demons are not
Speaker 1: being able to you know, living your truth, and you
Speaker 1: you are and you're trying to fight it, and it's like, yo,
Speaker 1: like no, that's when it becomes a demon. But if
Speaker 1: you basically, what she's saying is so I clear to something, y'all,
Speaker 1: y'all try to cancel her again. She's not saying that
Speaker 1: homosexuality is a demon. She's just saying when you're trying
Speaker 1: to hide it is when it's it seems like it's
Speaker 1: a demon. Ya, you're fighting it like you're you're you're
Speaker 1: fighting yourself, you know, and that and that's what spiritual
Speaker 1: warfare is like. When you fight with yourself, you fight
Speaker 1: with like you know who you are. You know when
Speaker 1: it's much easier to just walk in your truth and
Speaker 1: be who you are. You know what I'm saying, And
Speaker 1: then it don't matter who the funk accepts you. You
Speaker 1: know what you don't like. You're not supposed to be
Speaker 1: looking for acceptance by people anyway, looking for validation from
Speaker 1: other people anyway. I know that it may seem like
Speaker 1: it'll make your life easier to be accepted, but honestly,
Speaker 1: who the funk wants to fit in this funk up
Speaker 1: as world? So we're gonna end it on that note,
Speaker 1: say bias, peace out, and don't be judging my sense.
Speaker 1: But her name is Lady of Rage. What I or Instagram?
Speaker 1: Just kid? You want access to more questions about Good Guy,
Speaker 1: I Love You book and Every Wednesday hump Day and
Speaker 1: my best deep pad boys piece. Carefully Reckless is a
Speaker 1: production of I Heart Radio and The Black Effect. For
Speaker 1: more podcasts from I heart Radio, visit the I heart
Speaker 1: Radio app, Apple podcast, or wherever you listen to your
Speaker 1: favorite shows.