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Speaker 1: Piece of the plant is Charlamagne to God here and

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Speaker 1: as we come close to closing out this year, I

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Speaker 1: just want to say thank you for tuning it into

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Speaker 1: the Black Effect podcast Network. There have been so many

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Speaker 1: great moments over the past year. Take a listen to

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Speaker 1: some of those captivating moments in this special best of

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Speaker 1: episode episodes.

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Speaker 2: I am deeply Wow. I'm Debbie Brown and this is

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Speaker 2: the Deeply Well Podcast.

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Speaker 3: Today.

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Speaker 2: My guest is doctor Sheila Marie Campbell.

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Speaker 4: Chinese medicine doctors study just as much Western medicine as

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Speaker 4: they study Eastern medicine, but they practice, meaning they treat

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Speaker 4: with lifestyle modification. So somebody might come in and they

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Speaker 4: just need lifestyle modification. It's like, Okay, you have this deficiency,

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Speaker 4: so you need to add that food. Nutrition is always

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Speaker 4: the first line of defense within Chinese medicine. And then

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Speaker 4: there's going to be cheek cultivations, which is like your

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Speaker 4: cultivating your energy, which is something that nowadays, I mean,

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Speaker 4: you talk about this all the time, and I love

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Speaker 4: that you're so into cultivating your energy and who you're

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Speaker 4: allowing in your space and boundaries. That's all part of

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Speaker 4: Chinese medicine. And so when we're needling different people. We're

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Speaker 4: basically reinforcing their energetic boundary with their own body, with

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Speaker 4: their own world, with the way that their body is

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Speaker 4: interfacing with the world. And then when you take it

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Speaker 4: even further, when you're going because I like to blend

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Speaker 4: theories a little bit, so now we're going to go

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Speaker 4: chemistry and Chinese medicine, where it's like, if you understand,

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Speaker 4: we're all chemical beings interacting with the universe. We have

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Speaker 4: and we even say it when you're attracted to somebody,

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Speaker 4: you say, I have chemistry with that person. So what

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Speaker 4: I'm thinking about all the time is how do you

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Speaker 4: have deeper chemistry with the universe than people? And that's

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Speaker 4: how you're going to build stability, like real stability, because

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Speaker 4: you can't just walk around the world.

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Speaker 2: Hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on, I'll go back.

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Speaker 2: Can we sit in that first sei, Yeah, of course,

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Speaker 2: let's open that thing up. Yeah, I have more chemistry

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Speaker 2: with the universe. Can you expand there? That is gorgeous?

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Speaker 3: Yes.

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Speaker 4: So when you break down what is the human body

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Speaker 4: made of carbon, nitrogen, oxygen like hydrogen, you're chemical. You're

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Speaker 4: a chemical being. And so when you're having chemistry or

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Speaker 4: reactivity to somebody. It's your chemistry reacting to someone else's chemistry.

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Speaker 4: And so even attraction attraction is a chemical reaction, it's

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Speaker 4: just a positive one. And then we have non attraction

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Speaker 4: or lack of attraction that's a negative energy, or we

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Speaker 4: perceive it as negative. But really, what I like to

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Speaker 4: think of it is if you can really really ground

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Speaker 4: your energy, you're not going to just react to every

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Speaker 4: little bubble that pops into your space. Yeah, And so

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Speaker 4: that's like when you're building a relationship or you're building

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Speaker 4: a cosmic foundation with the universe. You're building a relationship

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Speaker 4: with the Sun, you're building a relationship with the moon.

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Speaker 4: So we're building a relationship with the earth that we're

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Speaker 4: walking on. And what I love about the Taoist practices

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Speaker 4: is there's chi movements or energy movements for every single

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Speaker 4: one of those. There's energy movements for connecting to the Earth,

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Speaker 4: there's energy movements for connecting to the Sun, for connecting

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Speaker 4: to the moon. And part of like Taoist rituals one

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Speaker 4: oh one is when you wake up, you connect to

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Speaker 4: the sun, and when your workday is done, you change

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Speaker 4: all of your clothes and then you connect with the moon,

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Speaker 4: and so it's really teaching you how to be in

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Speaker 4: a harmony with the universe and be in balance with

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Speaker 4: the universe. And that's even something that I teach in breakups,

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Speaker 4: where it's like if you're so chemically connected to somebody,

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Speaker 4: like you should be connected to the sun that way,

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Speaker 4: like you should be harnessing the sun that way. And

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Speaker 4: then it's like all of the additives are just kind

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Speaker 4: of like having dessert or like when you feel so

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Speaker 4: connected to the universe, it's like that's your potatoes for

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Speaker 4: me at least, Like I'm a stake girl, so it's

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Speaker 4: like that's like that's your sustenance to life. And I

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Speaker 4: love the solar power and like what we're doing nowadays

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Speaker 4: because it's just like when even if you think about

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Speaker 4: all the solar panels that are going on the house

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Speaker 4: that are like harnessing the energy of the sun, or

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Speaker 4: the electric cars that are getting solar power from the

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Speaker 4: house that are driving, and we should be doing that

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Speaker 4: every day. We should be harnessing the energy of the sun.

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Speaker 4: There's so much energy from the sun coming every single day,

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Speaker 4: and even if people live in a place that you

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Speaker 4: don't see the sunlight every day, the sun is still

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Speaker 4: up every single day, and you can harness the energy

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Speaker 4: that it's emitting even if you're not physically in contact.

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Speaker 4: I believe that we've talked about this too, Like watching

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Speaker 4: the sunrise and watching the sunset, there's just the magical

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Speaker 4: color shower we get from the sun. And I think

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Speaker 4: so even with the technology that's happening in the world

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Speaker 4: with power from the sun, that's such an old Chinese

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Speaker 4: medicine practice of harnessing the energy of the sun. That

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Speaker 4: is a practice that my teachers would say, if you can't,

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Speaker 4: I mean, the chi forms are complicated, and to practice

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Speaker 4: tai chi and to practice chigong, it's a lifelong study.

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Speaker 4: And so there's like if you can't remember, or you

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Speaker 4: don't want to do it, or you're too lazy or

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Speaker 4: whatever it is, just make sure you connect to the

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Speaker 4: sun every day, and make make sure you connect to

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Speaker 4: the moon at night, and then do at least one

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Speaker 4: form of cleansing the channels and the meridians. Because the

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Speaker 4: thing is is there's a lot of different types of

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Speaker 4: energy around, whether it's energy from the city that you're

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Speaker 4: in or energy from people, and it's your body is

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Speaker 4: constantly filtering energy and you could feel really bad about

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Speaker 4: yourself and it has nothing to do with you. And

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Speaker 4: so you have to learn at least one form of

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Speaker 4: how to cleanse your energy.

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Speaker 2: Shaka sing.

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Speaker 5: You know, people there must story sometime they're like, you know,

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Speaker 5: I can't imagine myself going through you what you've gone through.

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Speaker 5: I mean I cann't imagine it either until I was

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Speaker 5: there and being able to explore that internal world, which

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Speaker 5: I found that you know, when you think about Mandela

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Speaker 5: and you think about Malcolm, is that that was something

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Speaker 5: that they both had in common, is the exploration of

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Speaker 5: their own worlds and asking questions. One of the one

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Speaker 5: of the things I got really into philosophy while I

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Speaker 5: was in solitary. I was always curious about, you know,

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Speaker 5: how how does the mind work? And I remember reading

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Speaker 5: the Apology and Socrates said the unexamined life isn't worth living.

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Speaker 5: And when I began to examine my life, I began

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Speaker 5: to journal and write down like what happened to me?

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Speaker 5: You know, I started to ask these vario essential questions.

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Speaker 5: How did I go from an honor Roll scholarship student

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Speaker 5: with James of being a doctor and an artist who

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Speaker 5: serving on my most promising years in prison, and that

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Speaker 5: led to me just really being honest about what had happened.

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Speaker 5: The level of trauma that my body has experienced and

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Speaker 5: that has been through it's probably unimaginable the most people,

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Speaker 5: the brutality of the street culture that I lived in.

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Speaker 5: You know, most people can't even comprehend the magnitude of

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Speaker 5: the suffering that happens in that space because so much

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Speaker 5: of it is glorified. And so for me, it's that

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Speaker 5: internal journey that I'm always inviting people on to go on.

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Speaker 5: It's like the journey of self is beautiful, it's powerful,

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Speaker 5: and you unearthed so many things about yourself that you

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Speaker 5: didn't even believe was possible. And it all ties back to,

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Speaker 5: you know, what you were saying earlier about the traumatic

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Speaker 5: way that our lives play out up until the moment

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Speaker 5: where people are confronted with our innate power. You know,

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Speaker 5: struggle has been our dane from birth, right like we

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Speaker 5: know we know the mother's story of giving birth, you know,

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Speaker 5: we can you know viscerally experience, you know, a woman

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Speaker 5: pushing the child out through sheer labor and you know,

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Speaker 5: exhausting and pain and all the things we don't know

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Speaker 5: the child's story because they can't articulate it, you know,

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Speaker 5: other than with a crime. But when you think about

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Speaker 5: what that struggle is to get out of the womb,

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Speaker 5: doctors pulling on your head, i'mas pushing you from outside.

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Speaker 5: So we come into this world through struggle, I mean,

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Speaker 5: even through conception. You know, there's a war for sperm

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Speaker 5: to reach the egg. It's not like an easy chill pathway.

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Speaker 5: It's like, you know, I got to get there, you know,

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Speaker 5: And and so that's ordained. It's in us, you know,

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Speaker 5: to navigate adversity, to overcome obstacles, to overcome barriers to

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Speaker 5: entry into this thing that we call the world. And

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Speaker 5: so when you recognize that that is cellular that's in ourselves,

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Speaker 5: in our DNA, and you attached to that through that

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Speaker 5: internal journey, and you recognize like, I was born through struggle,

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Speaker 5: you know, and I fought to be here. You know,

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Speaker 5: every human being that's on this earth right now fought

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Speaker 5: to be here. And I think when we begin to

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Speaker 5: honor that, we actually begin to learn how to fight

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Speaker 5: in the best interests of our own health, well being, salvation,

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Speaker 5: our humanity. But when you take that for granted, it's

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Speaker 5: easy to extinguish that. And what happens is when you

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Speaker 5: come up against the force that is making you, forcing

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Speaker 5: you to confront your unwillingness or inability to recognize what

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Speaker 5: your humanist is, you have to extinguish that flame. And

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Speaker 5: so you know what Pop represented was, here's what it

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Speaker 5: means to be human as it exists in this world

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Speaker 5: from a black male perspective. And that's threatening and that's challenging.

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Speaker 5: And some of those challenges existed within him. He hadn't

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Speaker 5: quite reconciled, you know, and so it shows up in

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Speaker 5: these external ways. And you know, you think about Malcolm

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Speaker 5: and the person who pulled that trigger. What did Malcolm represent,

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Speaker 5: you know, to that person when it comes to having

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Speaker 5: to extinguish that beautiful humanity, that complex humanity that challenged

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Speaker 5: us to think differently and to fight for our human rights,

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Speaker 5: which is just basic dignity, you know, the things we're

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Speaker 5: still fighting for today and we're figuring out today, and

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Speaker 5: you know, sadly we're still confronted with people who want

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Speaker 5: to extinguish that that that flame. You know, they do

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Speaker 5: it in a very much more sophisticated way now. But

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Speaker 5: you know, my my push is for as humans, if

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Speaker 5: we start to collectively go inward and recognize our connectivity

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Speaker 5: to every human being that we encounter, like, we can

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Speaker 5: win the war.

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Speaker 2: You know.

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Speaker 5: We're losing battles right now, but we can win a war,

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Speaker 5: you know, but we have to be willing to acknowledge

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Speaker 5: and reconcile that. You know, this journey was ordained for us.

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Speaker 2: Today's episode is featuring the Saudi simon, Why.

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Speaker 3: Did I do it? What happened?

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Speaker 2: So?

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Speaker 6: Mom died December twenty fifth of twenty twenty two.

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Speaker 3: January February March.

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Speaker 6: I was incomplete this enchantment with humanity. Simultaneously, I had

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Speaker 6: my training started, so I was training one hundred people

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Speaker 6: and how to be somatic activated healers. So I had

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Speaker 6: to immediately lock in a part of me and deliver

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Speaker 6: this training to these people. Had paid good money to

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Speaker 6: learn this method and to teach this method right, and

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Speaker 6: looking back, that was a life affirming choice. That was

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Speaker 6: a life giving choice because it anchored me in service.

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Speaker 6: It anchored me here. And then a few like genetic

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Speaker 6: vated Mars and then April came around, and I remember

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Speaker 6: feeling the sensitized of to my grief. I remember questioning

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Speaker 6: did my mom ever live? Did she ever love me?

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Speaker 6: And I did I even have a life with her?

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Speaker 6: It was so the sensitized and I was and I

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Speaker 6: was losing sight of the grief to such a degreed

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Speaker 6: that I started to question if I even have had

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Speaker 6: a mother?

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Speaker 3: Does that make sense?

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Speaker 6: It's on the verge of a little like insanity a

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Speaker 6: little bit. But that's what grief can can kind of

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Speaker 6: pull you towards, you know, And I said.

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Speaker 2: Do you know what you're saying is especially in a

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Speaker 2: role like that of and you. The two of you

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Speaker 2: had such a beautiful relationship, so much love filled the

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Speaker 2: room when the two of you were together. So that

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Speaker 2: was such a blessed experience to have with a mother.

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Speaker 2: But what I'm hearing is too, when you lose your

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Speaker 2: first god, your first home, right, your mother, that is

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Speaker 2: calling into question all the roles that you play. Every

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Speaker 2: really brings in the what am I? And what am I?

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Speaker 2: If she doesn't exist?

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Speaker 3: Exactly?

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Speaker 6: All of it, literally, all of that it was and

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Speaker 6: the it became such a it was so heavy to

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Speaker 6: carry the idea and it still is of living through

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Speaker 6: life without that anchor, without that figure in my life.

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Speaker 6: You know, so all of this to say that I

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Speaker 6: started to be desensitized to the grief and I started

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Speaker 6: to take on more work, do more things, and I

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Speaker 6: was like, hmm, this is not I think I'm I

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Speaker 6: think I've lost the plot, like I should not be

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Speaker 6: high performance SAT right now. Something is off. And that's

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Speaker 6: when I realized that what was off was not enough

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Speaker 6: space for the grief to emerge, not enough space for

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Speaker 6: the grief to break me down, not enough time to

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Speaker 6: fall apart, and fall apart so gracefully that no one

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Speaker 6: who would hear me my mother just died would flinch

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Speaker 6: or say I'm so sorry for your lost thoughts in prayer,

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Speaker 6: or they would do the immediate thing. She's in a

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Speaker 6: better place, she's your ancestor now she has angel wings,

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Speaker 6: now she's watching over you.

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Speaker 3: At least she's not in pain.

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Speaker 6: You know, all the well intended things that we say

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Speaker 6: during grief which are tremendously.

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Speaker 2: Hurtful, it's for that person's comfort.

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Speaker 6: Exactly, because they're so deeply uncomfortable with how you are

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Speaker 6: feeling that they want to name something, say something that

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Speaker 6: in their mind could potentially resolve or fix you out

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Speaker 6: of suffering so they feel better without understanding that suffering

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Speaker 6: ceases and passes and changes with presents. So I needed

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Speaker 6: a concerted amount of time to fall apart, and to

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Speaker 6: fall apart in such a graceful way that I wouldn't

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Speaker 6: have anyone, even the well intended friends and community and strangers,

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Speaker 6: because so many people follow my work, running to fans

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Speaker 6: all the time, and they would always want to say

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Speaker 6: something so sweet and so kind, and it would always

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Speaker 6: like tug at me at my experience with the grief.

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Speaker 6: So going on this walk was the specific amount of time.

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Speaker 6: I didn't know that thirty two days was going to

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Speaker 6: I was gonna be the perfect amount of time. To

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Speaker 6: be honest, I just knew I needed to walk with

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Speaker 6: the grief. I knew that walking does so well for

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Speaker 6: me as a meditative practice, as a spiritual practice, as

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Speaker 6: an opportunity to just be with a feeling, be with

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Speaker 6: an experience. And I had downloaded all these playlists and

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Speaker 6: these podcasts and these books that I wanted to listen to,

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Speaker 6: and I really realized that I was saturated with enormous

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Speaker 6: amounts of information inside of me that I didn't need

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Speaker 6: to add music.

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Speaker 3: I didn't need to add a podcast. I didn't need

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Speaker 3: to add a book in order.

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Speaker 6: For me to distract myself from the overload of information

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Speaker 6: that was being poured into me by the grief. So

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Speaker 6: I just walked with this experience, and I just walked

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Speaker 6: with the unpleasantness of the grief, and at some point

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Speaker 6: I started to really make friends with grief that hey,

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Speaker 6: this is a friend that will be with me for

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Speaker 6: the rest of my life because I think the I

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Speaker 6: think En LaMonte says, it's like you start to limp

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Speaker 6: and you just realize that the limp is part of

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Speaker 6: your new way of walking.

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Speaker 2: In this episode, I really want to dive into some

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Speaker 2: thoughts I've been having around the timelines for Sometimes our

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Speaker 2: cycles of growth and learning can feel glacial. Other times

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Speaker 2: it feels as if we are being hurled into a

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Speaker 2: new self at full speed. Healing can happen in a decade,

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Speaker 2: or it can happen in the blink of an eye.

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Speaker 2: I've found that our openness and willingness to receive and

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Speaker 2: accept determine the timeframe. As I looked back on these

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Speaker 2: various versions of myself in the last you know, really

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Speaker 2: kind of twenty working years of my life, I could

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Speaker 2: also see, you know who I was, who I wasn't

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Speaker 2: who I was becoming, who I was trying to be,

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Speaker 2: who I thought I was. You know, all the different

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Speaker 2: ways that we try ourselves on over and over and

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Speaker 2: over again, and all the ways that if we're aware

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Speaker 2: of ourselves, we kind of fight ourselves over and over

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Speaker 2: and over again. And so to that thought, the pace

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Speaker 2: of growth, you know, spending some time with really identifying

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Speaker 2: for yourself what are some of those patterns in your life?

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Speaker 2: And we have so many, right you have your deeper

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Speaker 2: grooved patterns, which are some of those behaviors, some of

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Speaker 2: those ways of being that really affect your life and

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Speaker 2: the quality of relationship you're able to have with others

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Speaker 2: in all the different spectors of your life. And then

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Speaker 2: we have those other kind of smaller patterns which may

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Speaker 2: you know, kind of be around how we show up

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Speaker 2: for ourselves or not, how we you know, make certain

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Speaker 2: kinds of choices or not. But it really is so

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Speaker 2: interesting once you get into a practice with whatever your

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Speaker 2: patterns are, the sooner you can identify them and really

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Speaker 2: just observe them without judgment, coming into an acceptance of them,

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Speaker 2: the sooner you can work and participate with the energy.

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Speaker 2: I feel like sometimes all healing ass of us is

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Speaker 2: for our participation. It just wants us to turn on

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Speaker 2: that creator switch and really commit to the fact that

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Speaker 2: life is happening and we are at play with it.

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Speaker 2: We are in a dance with it. Sometimes the song

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Speaker 2: is sad, Sometimes the song is best. Sometimes the song

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Speaker 2: is a slow instrumental. Sometimes the song is really exciting.

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Speaker 2: Sometimes it's a love song. You know, but we're all

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Speaker 2: dancing to whatever rhythm is currently present, and it's just

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Speaker 2: so important to acknowledge and accept that so you can

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Speaker 2: participate with it. That is the ent higher point of

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Speaker 2: being here. And when I say here, I mean earth,

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Speaker 2: When I say here, I mean in your human body,

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Speaker 2: having your spiritual experience. When I say here, I mean living, alive, existing,

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Speaker 2: we are alive to create within creation. It's choices, it's participation.

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Speaker 2: And so when we kind of get into that groove

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Speaker 2: with ourselves and with our patterns and with the way

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Speaker 2: life moves through us, we then get the opportunity to say,

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Speaker 2: how long do I want to suffer? Or how long

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Speaker 2: do I want to be stuck? Or how long do

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Speaker 2: I want to stand still in whatever this current moment is.

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Speaker 2: Answer is always different for each of us. Whatever the

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Speaker 2: you know, kind of catalyzing experience we're after, and that

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Speaker 2: experience it's different for each of us, but the timeline

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Speaker 2: can change. And the timeline is based on choice, it's

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Speaker 2: based on action, it's based on acceptance, It's based on surrender.

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Speaker 2: The formula is surrender and acceptance. You know. I think

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Speaker 2: the question that's always going through the internet, and most

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Speaker 2: definitely the question I get asked a lot, is what's

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Speaker 2: the hack? What's the growth hack? You know, what's the

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Speaker 2: hack for healing? There's no hack, but there is a formula.

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Speaker 2: And the formula is surrender. It's acceptance and its participation.

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Speaker 2: And I think when we have some of those patterns

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Speaker 2: that we realize are our thing that we find ourselves

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Speaker 2: back in or you know, even if it's not a pattern,

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Speaker 2: if it's just a limiting belief, or if it's a

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Speaker 2: barrier that we're ready to take down, you know, something

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Speaker 2: that is stopping us from being more of ourselves or

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Speaker 2: you know, answering our unique call, whatever that is. When

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Speaker 2: we recognize it, and we all have many, our participation

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Speaker 2: decides whether or not we want to keep kind of

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Speaker 2: looping around that experience for ten years, or if we

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Speaker 2: want to kind of knock it out in an afternoon

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Speaker 2: or a week even, you know that is possibles.

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Speaker 1: Once again, thank you for tuning into the blackfect Podcast Network.

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Speaker 1: See you Are twenty twenty five from more great moments

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Speaker 1: from your favorite podcast