Speaker 1: This is the most dramatic podcast ever and iHeartRadio podcast.
Speaker 1: Chris Harrison and Lauren z Ema coming to you from
Speaker 1: our home office in Austin, Texas, LZ, Happy universary.
Speaker 2: Happy anniversary, babe. We wanted to come on and record
Speaker 2: a podcast because one year ago today today, November fourth,
Speaker 2: twenty twenty three, we were having the best morning of
Speaker 2: getting ready at home. Our kids were there, Josh and Taylor,
Speaker 2: Josh's girlfriend, Catherine, my family, our your family, your family
Speaker 2: was in town. Our dearest friends were all getting ready
Speaker 2: and looking dapper in accordance with the theme that I
Speaker 2: pushed upon them, all cowboy chic and getting ready for
Speaker 2: us to have the best party of our lives in Austin, Texas.
Speaker 1: Actually, what I was doing I remember vividly that morning.
Speaker 1: I walked out because we had two meat smokers in
Speaker 1: our driveway and yes.
Speaker 2: Courtesy of Bambam's Barbecue in Utah.
Speaker 1: Our boy Cameron and so our friend Cameron. One of
Speaker 1: his gift to us was he wanted to come in
Speaker 1: from his barbecue place in Provo, Utah. And if you're
Speaker 1: around Salt Lake City, if you get up to Park City,
Speaker 1: if you're around Provo, got to go to Bam Bams anyway,
Speaker 1: so he wanted a barbecue. He's like, well, I'm just
Speaker 1: going to barbecue in your driveway. So he dropped a
Speaker 1: bunch of meat smokers in our driveway. So at eight
Speaker 1: thirty in the morning, I walked out on my wedding
Speaker 1: day and he's out there pulling the pork butts off
Speaker 1: in the brisket.
Speaker 2: And he'd been cooking all night with my mom. He'd
Speaker 2: been out. They'd been baking together with my mom and
Speaker 2: sister and my brother's girlfriend.
Speaker 1: And that's how the wedding day started.
Speaker 2: It was wonderful. And look, I know we kind of
Speaker 2: we mentioned our anniversary a few podcasts ago because and
Speaker 2: we got to figure out how we're going to move
Speaker 2: forward here. But I'm also a big like the more celebrating,
Speaker 2: the better person. So we got married on October fourteenth
Speaker 2: in Napa at the most beautiful wedding at Roy Estate.
Speaker 2: Go there if you are in Napa. Is the most
Speaker 2: magical place. It's like a modern day castle in Napa, California,
Speaker 2: on the most stunning day with our a small group
Speaker 2: about thirty five of our closest family and friends, and
Speaker 2: it was magical. And we drank great wine and had
Speaker 2: an incredible dinner and danced all night at the Archer
Speaker 2: Hotel there. But then we thought, we have so many
Speaker 2: great family and friends in our lives, we got to
Speaker 2: have a big blowout party in the home we love
Speaker 2: so much, Austin, Texas. And that's what we did on
Speaker 2: November fourth. Yeah, the night, two hundred and fifty people
Speaker 2: at that one.
Speaker 1: That was it was amazing. So the night before, you know,
Speaker 1: obviously I think we've we've talked about this before. We
Speaker 1: had the bachelor family, all of them that could make
Speaker 1: it in town that night made.
Speaker 2: It there and then here here in Austin.
Speaker 1: Here in Austin.
Speaker 2: Friday night that weekend we had a bachelor reunion at
Speaker 2: our house and intimate gathering.
Speaker 1: A couple of people like Elon Gail, our producer, I
Speaker 1: think Sean and Catherine came in the day of so
Speaker 1: but it was a great night that led into a
Speaker 1: wonderful morning. So we got up that morning we were
Speaker 1: barbecuing with cam and the driveway and all that. But
Speaker 1: the whole day was so chill.
Speaker 2: They were so easy.
Speaker 1: Yeah, it was very easy.
Speaker 2: I think we had taken the nerves out of it
Speaker 2: with the NAPA wedding first, and again I can't recommend,
Speaker 2: I don't recommend the two party system, but I recommend
Speaker 2: the two wedding system. We had this emotional wedding with
Speaker 2: again just the smallest amount of family and friends, and
Speaker 2: so we got our nerves out there. We had the
Speaker 2: big butterflies in our stomach leading up to the vows
Speaker 2: there and we were able to have really focused time
Speaker 2: with family and friends. So I think the day of
Speaker 2: this big party in Austin and we did our vows
Speaker 2: again in Austin, so all of our friends and family
Speaker 2: who were there got to hear everything and feel part
Speaker 2: of everything, but our nerves were gone. We'd kind of
Speaker 2: already done it once through and knew we nailed it,
Speaker 2: and we just got to enjoy. I thought, and actually
Speaker 2: I love doing the vows twice because then I sort
Speaker 2: of really got to hear what you were saying, because
Speaker 2: you know, the first time you almost black out a
Speaker 2: little bit or something.
Speaker 1: Favorite part of the day and one of my two
Speaker 1: things that really stood out that I would I don't
Speaker 1: know how you can do it, because if you don't
Speaker 1: do two weddings, you know you're not going to get
Speaker 1: the first look and all that. So we'd already done
Speaker 1: all those things, like Lauren was just talking about. So
Speaker 1: one of the most beautiful things is we got ready
Speaker 1: here at the house, and there's something easy about getting
Speaker 1: ready in your own place. So we're getting ready together.
Speaker 2: I know. That was really fun because we weren't because
Speaker 2: in Napa, obviously it's like we're waiting to see. But
Speaker 2: I liked having both. I liked ware traditional until the
Speaker 2: walk down the aisle.
Speaker 1: That was more traditional. We're separated and all that, which
Speaker 1: is great, and the anticipation was building all day. You know,
Speaker 1: I was like, what she doing. And I was hanging
Speaker 1: out with my you know, my dad and my brother
Speaker 1: and your brother, and we were kind of taking you know,
Speaker 1: it's just like traditional. But that day here getting ready
Speaker 1: with you, just walking around, the kids were here. I'll
Speaker 1: never forget when we to drive over to the ceremony.
Speaker 1: That's what really struck me is this is fantastic. It
Speaker 1: was really it was weird. But everybody had left your family,
Speaker 1: everybody had already made it their way to the wedding site,
Speaker 1: and the only people that were left were us and
Speaker 1: we me, you and Josh and Tay got in the
Speaker 1: truck and drove to our wedding and it was just
Speaker 1: it was we just put on some music and we
Speaker 1: were just talking like we were going to dinner.
Speaker 2: It was really casual and cool, and you know, obviously
Speaker 2: we were able to afford these two parties. But I
Speaker 2: will also say we did a lot of I don't know,
Speaker 2: I'm still a Midwest girl. I save money where I can.
Speaker 2: We did a lot of doing some stuff ourselves, including
Speaker 2: my mother baking a lot of the desserts for the wedding.
Speaker 2: We did a lot of you know, I don't like
Speaker 2: our friend Cam did, so we did a lot of
Speaker 2: things here and there, and ultimately, I would confidently say
Speaker 2: that we got both weddings in total for the price
Speaker 2: of what a lot of people pay for one wedding.
Speaker 2: Now that being said, you know, whatever you can afford,
Speaker 2: you can afford. And at the end of the day,
Speaker 2: it's just about being with your friends and family.
Speaker 1: And we saved money on a car. We love ourselves,
Speaker 1: but pulled up to our own wedding.
Speaker 2: But I think the most important thing is the people
Speaker 2: and having some great music and you know, a few
Speaker 2: drinks and dancing all night long. But again, I sort
Speaker 2: of really do recommend all this as I'm reflecting one
Speaker 2: year later, which we wanted this podcast to be about,
Speaker 2: kind of reflecting one year later. We want to talk
Speaker 2: a little bit about where our marriage is at one
Speaker 2: year later. And as I'm thinking back, I think what
Speaker 2: people struggle with the most when planning a wedding is
Speaker 2: managing all the expectations, both for yourself and for those
Speaker 2: who love you like you're you know, a lot of
Speaker 2: people say like, oh, well, my mom was mad I
Speaker 2: didn't spend more time with her the day of, and
Speaker 2: and we kind of eliminated that with the two weddings,
Speaker 2: or well I was so busy saying hi to everyone,
Speaker 2: I didn't get to enjoy it, and we kind of
Speaker 2: eliminated that with the two weddings. So I stand behind,
Speaker 2: do something intimate and then have a party.
Speaker 1: Yeah. I don't know how what that looks like in
Speaker 1: any traditional sense, if you just like we're you know,
Speaker 1: doing the traditional church or traditional type of wedding. But man,
Speaker 1: it really did just it was like a release valve
Speaker 1: of pressure, and it was for everybody. And you know,
Speaker 1: Laura and I talk about ourselves and our pressure because
Speaker 1: that you know, the bride and groom are usually the
Speaker 1: ones that really feel it, but everybody kind of felt totally.
Speaker 2: Like my sister was more tense, not you know, but
Speaker 2: more on edge on the day of the NAPA wedding
Speaker 2: because she's thinking, I got to walk down the aisle
Speaker 2: and I'm.
Speaker 1: Your mom my, mom my, dad. Yeah, yeah, for sure,
Speaker 1: No for everybody. Everybody got to just relax, and there
Speaker 1: was like a little bit of a cocktail hour before
Speaker 1: you and I got to the Austin wedding. But the
Speaker 1: second thing that I love the most in retrospect, and
Speaker 1: I'm looking back at pictures today, you and I are
Speaker 1: both looking at videos and pictures and the walk down
Speaker 1: the aisle when we got there, the kids walked in,
Speaker 1: and you and I stood around the corner and we
Speaker 1: held hands and we got to be there together for
Speaker 1: a minute. And then we walked into our own wedding together,
Speaker 1: and again it was just talk about a release valve
Speaker 1: of emotions where we got to look at each other,
Speaker 1: We got to stop look and make eye contact with
Speaker 1: the people that were there.
Speaker 2: Yeah, because we weren't looking at each other as we
Speaker 2: did in the more traditional NAPA wedding. In that wedding,
Speaker 2: I was focused on you, But at Austin, I was
Speaker 2: looking around and seeing everyone as we walked down the aisle,
Speaker 2: like oh, and saying hi to people.
Speaker 1: We watched the video of both weddings today, saved it
Speaker 1: had not watched it, had not watched it. So we
Speaker 1: watched it together, tears in our eyes, of course, and
Speaker 1: we're crying and it was beautiful. But one thing that
Speaker 1: hit me was when I saw myself walking down the
Speaker 1: aisle in Napa at our first wedding, I'm like, why
Speaker 1: didn't you slow down? Why didn't you like pat people
Speaker 1: on the shoulder and like hug people and like, But
Speaker 1: I didn't. I was so nervous and excited in my head,
Speaker 1: I all but sprinted down the aisle. And I give
Speaker 1: this advice all the time, take time to smell the
Speaker 1: roses and take it all.
Speaker 2: So logistics, that's the thing. It isn't all on you.
Speaker 2: Part of its legit. You're thinking is the bride and groom.
Speaker 2: We only have this place until ten pm or whatever.
Speaker 2: Like there's literally a schedule you have to follow. So
Speaker 2: the two wedding system, it took a lot of the
Speaker 2: tension out of it. I feel so blessed for both days.
Speaker 2: And yeah, we wanted to wait until our one year
Speaker 2: anniversary to watch our videos and to look through a
Speaker 2: photo album. We had to save something special, So I was.
Speaker 1: Any strike you did anything pop out to you. Watching
Speaker 1: the videos for the first time.
Speaker 2: It was really cool. Well, I mean it just unlocked memories.
Speaker 2: I sort of had forgotten what the getting ready process was. Like.
Speaker 2: It was cool to see you getting ready because we're separate, so.
Speaker 1: The same thing. It was fun to see behind the
Speaker 1: scenes that you and your your mom and your sister
Speaker 1: getting you ready.
Speaker 2: And probably you know, everybody has a cell phone today,
Speaker 2: but still a videographer is just going to get angles
Speaker 2: you didn't and that kind of thing.
Speaker 1: And like I wrote you a letter every day of
Speaker 1: the last week before our wedding. I didn't know you
Speaker 1: read the last one, Like I didn't know when I
Speaker 1: thought maybe you did it that morning or and so
Speaker 1: I got to see you reading that for the first time,
Speaker 1: and so all of it just being able to kind
Speaker 1: of I was like a fly on the wall.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's a reminder of the details. You remember it
Speaker 2: as this big, happy thing, but it is nice to
Speaker 2: have those, oh, visual memories.
Speaker 1: A mistake I made, and luckily you corrected it, and
Speaker 1: it would have would have been a big faux pas.
Speaker 1: As we watched the videos today, I wasn't all that
Speaker 1: into a videographer to start, Remember, I was like, oh, photographer,
Speaker 1: I want the pictures and all that, but I don't.
Speaker 1: Maybe it's because of bats or days and being on
Speaker 1: camera so much and you and I doing so much
Speaker 1: TV as like, oh, I don't really care to see
Speaker 1: myself on TV again anymore. And I would have been
Speaker 1: so stilled that way. Well, no, I don't mean like
Speaker 1: I don't want to work again. I just met like
Speaker 1: I don't need to. I didn't feel the need to
Speaker 1: video myself because I don't know I did.
Speaker 2: It felt self indulgent or something.
Speaker 1: Yeah or something, I don't know.
Speaker 2: I was just like you, only like weddings went the
Speaker 2: focus on.
Speaker 1: But I was the one that was like, oh, babe,
Speaker 1: I don't know if we need a videographer, and you
Speaker 1: and our assistant Karen, who was such a big part
Speaker 1: of this wedding.
Speaker 2: And shout out to Karen, so helpful.
Speaker 1: But that you guys forced me to do that, and
Speaker 1: I am so glad as we watched that video that
Speaker 1: would have been lost forever. So many in it, by
Speaker 1: the way, different than pictures. Everything looks so much more
Speaker 1: vibrant and beautiful.
Speaker 2: Yes, and thank god it came together at the last
Speaker 2: minute because we finally convinced you of this a little close.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I was late. I was late.
Speaker 2: Was I figed someone?
Speaker 1: That was my big gap.
Speaker 2: Thank you to Kiko, Francisco Media and NAPA for coming
Speaker 2: through close to the end there I goofed on that.
Speaker 2: You know, I listen. I actually, uh, I used to
Speaker 2: feel the same as you, like in the very beginning,
Speaker 2: I kind of agreed with you, like, yeah, who watches
Speaker 2: their wedding video? You kind of just need the pictures.
Speaker 2: But I think it's a different time now. I mean,
Speaker 2: everything is so on social media and it's so video
Speaker 2: focused now that actually video is what you watch more
Speaker 2: than pictures in modern times. I think like back in
Speaker 2: the day, people probably even lost their vhs of their
Speaker 2: wedding video, but you know, you frame the photos and
Speaker 2: put them on your walls. Today, I think people take
Speaker 2: in video more. And you're right. One thing I didn't
Speaker 2: see coming was that I actually think the video captured
Speaker 2: the the day better than the photos. Well, I don't know.
Speaker 2: I guess it's the difference of camera or whatever, but
Speaker 2: literally you could the sky was so beautiful in Napa,
Speaker 2: and I think the video captured it better than the
Speaker 2: photography did, just because of cameras and lenses and stuff,
Speaker 2: and so it was so gorgeous. And I really do feel,
Speaker 2: on that note, blessed for both Austin and Napa. When
Speaker 2: I look back in Napa the week before there had
Speaker 2: been a massive heat wave and we were sort of nervous,
Speaker 2: and then the day of our wedding, it not only
Speaker 2: was the weather amazing, but the sky was stunning. And
Speaker 2: then in Austin, now that I kind of know Austin
Speaker 2: a little better, I think the week before it was raining.
Speaker 1: Well look at today as we are taping this, it's
Speaker 1: raining here in Austin. There's a massive storm coming in
Speaker 1: the next two days.
Speaker 2: Yes, so we were taking more of a risk with
Speaker 2: an outside wedding than I thought we were. And again
Speaker 2: we just had a perfect, glorious day. We didn't even
Speaker 2: need We were worried should we get heaters. We didn't
Speaker 2: need anything.
Speaker 1: One of those Texas sunsets with a huge Texas sky,
Speaker 1: and you know, it was fun. As I look back
Speaker 1: as we saw the video of like our friends, because
Speaker 1: there was like a real longhorn, a Texas longhorn there
Speaker 1: and our friends, you know, that showed up from LA
Speaker 1: and a lot of the batch of people are taking
Speaker 1: pictures with the longhorn. And it was just a great
Speaker 1: country western Austin, Texas theme and it really came off
Speaker 1: and you know, like it could be a little cheesy,
Speaker 1: but it came off really well.
Speaker 2: It was cowboy she.
Speaker 3: It was cowboy she.
Speaker 2: I feel so blessed to feel that there's not a
Speaker 2: thing I would go back and change. I mean, well,
Speaker 2: I say that with a caveat could you analyze it
Speaker 2: and say, oh sure. But if you're planning a wedding,
Speaker 2: my advice is you just have to accept that, like
Speaker 2: you're going to hope for an A minus, you know
Speaker 2: what I mean. It is impossible when you're planning a
Speaker 2: wedding is a production, it is an event. Life is
Speaker 2: going to happen. It will be impossible that it will
Speaker 2: go completely perfectly as you picture it in your mind.
Speaker 2: But if you have an A minus, it's it's amazing.
Speaker 2: And I really do think it was the perfect combination
Speaker 2: of you know, spending money where we did, doing some
Speaker 2: things ourselves where we did, because that also made it
Speaker 2: more personal and connected, and having our families involved, and
Speaker 2: you know, there's laughter and joy like in those moments
Speaker 2: like baking with Cam and our and my mind was
Speaker 2: up all night before, yeah, and doing the gift bags
Speaker 2: with my sister. And so when you family feel I
Speaker 2: recommend involving family because they feel part of it. And
Speaker 2: then I think there's like a spiritual element. I really
Speaker 2: do think my Dad was looking down on us, giving
Speaker 2: us those two perfect days of weather, and I felt
Speaker 2: that all of our hard work came together, and that
Speaker 2: also our attitude of knowing, of keeping the perspective like
Speaker 2: I did go into it thinking if a few things
Speaker 2: go wrong, I'm not going to be upset because I'm
Speaker 2: really just happy to marry this man. And what I
Speaker 2: do tell people is a good gauge on whether you
Speaker 2: should marry someone, is this, if you couldn't have a wedding,
Speaker 2: if you were not allowed to have the party that
Speaker 2: we all dream of, would you still want to marry
Speaker 2: the person. Well, some people get wrapped up in the party.
Speaker 2: I think it's easy to do because it's such a
Speaker 2: big part of our culture.
Speaker 1: It's been a year. Does it feel like it to you?
Speaker 1: To me, it seems like a long time ago. If
Speaker 1: you told me it was two years or three, I'd be.
Speaker 2: Like, I, why do you think that is? I agree?
Speaker 2: Is it because we're in this election? You're in? This
Speaker 2: Year's felt like a lot going on. I know.
Speaker 1: I just feel like I look like the eve of.
Speaker 2: Our I mean, we're on the our anniversary and it's
Speaker 2: the eve of the election.
Speaker 1: Yeah. I know that we didn't plan out for now
Speaker 1: thinking a year ahead. But maybe this is the the
Speaker 1: distraction we all need. But to me, it just I
Speaker 1: look back and I think, Wow, a lot's changed in
Speaker 1: a great way since in just a year. It feels
Speaker 1: like a long time. I feel like we've grown a
Speaker 1: lot together, and I feel like we did. Honestly, if
Speaker 1: you'd asked me that day, this day, a year ago,
Speaker 1: do you have a lot more to grow and to
Speaker 1: learn and to progress in your love in relationship? I'd
Speaker 1: say no, you know we're there. But it is amazing
Speaker 1: how time and history and just experiences propels you forward
Speaker 1: in a relationship. If you're both in love and you're
Speaker 1: both willing and able to dive into that, and so
Speaker 1: I guess this year is just I feel like we've
Speaker 1: progressed so much as a couple, and I assume we
Speaker 1: will feel the same a year from now and two,
Speaker 1: you know, as we go on. So I don't know,
Speaker 1: that's how I feel. How do you feel?
Speaker 2: I completely agree? And what strange is we didn't talk
Speaker 2: about this before we'd sat down to record this, but
Speaker 2: I was just like in the bathroom and thinking about
Speaker 2: how it is weird. I do feel we've grown a
Speaker 2: lot in a year. And it's odd how you can
Speaker 2: feel really good. It's not like things were bad. You
Speaker 2: can feel good about your relationship. We're so happy the
Speaker 2: day we got married, and yet and yet looking back,
Speaker 2: I do feel we've progressed. And I guess the lesson
Speaker 2: there is, even when things are good, there's still growth
Speaker 2: to happen, and you want things to keep getting better,
Speaker 2: and growth is part of that.
Speaker 1: So and you think of the experience in life just
Speaker 1: comes at you right, and it's like, in that time,
Speaker 1: we've had a child graduate college and get them off
Speaker 1: in the real world, and a daughter get back to college,
Speaker 1: and a baby born in our family, and so good
Speaker 1: things and great things and there's In that.
Speaker 2: Time, we started a new job.
Speaker 1: We started media, joined mayor of Street Media that we
Speaker 1: had kind of started talking about in Earnest. Really around
Speaker 1: this our wedding, which was the one in Napa is
Speaker 1: when we really like kind of started cementing this deal.
Speaker 2: And so, yeah, gosh, I forgot about that. It was
Speaker 2: like on our wedding weekend we cemented the deal.
Speaker 1: We got a call and said happy wedding present from
Speaker 1: our lawyer.
Speaker 2: Wow, And then.
Speaker 1: The both our lawyers were at the Austin wedding. Yes,
Speaker 1: shout out to Chris Chatham and Brian Freeman. But yeah,
Speaker 1: so it just things happen, right, and it galvanizes you,
Speaker 1: or I guess that it could tear you apart if
Speaker 1: you're not strong. And you're both not into this, but.
Speaker 2: I think you're both not open. I think that's the
Speaker 2: biggest thing, right to me, The people who suffer the
Speaker 2: most in life are the ones who aren't open to growth,
Speaker 2: open to change, flexible, who don't welcome experiences affecting them.
Speaker 2: I think those are the people who truly suffer the most,
Speaker 2: because life's about evolution.
Speaker 1: There was a brain surgery in the family.
Speaker 2: Oh my gosh, yeah, we went to everything with your.
Speaker 1: Mom, thank god. Yeah, those things like you get to
Speaker 1: see like even honestly, like that week, I got to
Speaker 1: see a side of you that I had not seen before,
Speaker 1: this caretaker side of how is she going to take
Speaker 1: care of me and my family in need?
Speaker 2: And you mean the week with stuff with your mom?
Speaker 1: Yeah, just like you know, when things happen like that,
Speaker 1: like you just no, no, no no.
Speaker 2: And when there.
Speaker 1: Are times when things happen you're like you know and
Speaker 1: my uncle passing away and there, you know, there are
Speaker 1: things when you get different glimpses of your spouse, it
Speaker 1: just it brings you together. But again that's a good
Speaker 1: thing because those things could also tear your apart and
Speaker 1: fracture you and go, oh, she didn't really handle that well,
Speaker 1: or he didn't come, he didn't show up for me
Speaker 1: that day.
Speaker 2: And what do you think is the biggest change or
Speaker 2: evolution or growth that we have made in our relationship
Speaker 2: this year?
Speaker 1: I just feel more and more even and it's not
Speaker 1: like I didn't feel this a year ago, but I
Speaker 1: feel even more now that you are my partner in life.
Speaker 1: You are behind me, but not in a unquestioning way
Speaker 1: like you will put me, you know, hold my feet
Speaker 1: to the fire. You will question, but at the same
Speaker 1: time you will love and appreciate. You're my biggest fan
Speaker 1: and my biggest cheerleader, and I love that and I
Speaker 1: know that. But also again, you have to earn it,
Speaker 1: and I love that with you, is that you have
Speaker 1: to earn it and fight for it and work at it.
Speaker 1: And it's not just. It's not just given. Everything's earned.
Speaker 1: And I feel the same way, and so I guess
Speaker 1: the point is, there wasn't a moment that did that.
Speaker 1: Every hurdle that we've had, good or bad. Right, you
Speaker 1: have hurdles in life, and sometimes you're going up in life.
Speaker 1: Sometimes you're on the roller coaster down. But every hurdle
Speaker 1: we've crossed together, whether we've stumbled or not, it's brought
Speaker 1: us closer together. And I've seen a little different something
Speaker 1: about you.
Speaker 2: I do think you've changed a little bit on seeing
Speaker 2: challenging as like not a negative thing. Yeah, I think
Speaker 2: you see it as a more positive and loving thing. Now.
Speaker 1: That's happened this year, Yeah, yeah, that took You're right
Speaker 1: that we even though we've been together for five years,
Speaker 1: I think this year I've really come.
Speaker 2: To, but you always let me. You always. It's not
Speaker 2: like you never let me challenge you. But I think
Speaker 2: you've shifted your viewpoint in the past when I might
Speaker 2: challenge you or push you on something, you heard it,
Speaker 2: but you thought it was this negative thing, and now
Speaker 2: you're like, no, it's a good thing.
Speaker 1: More and more, how you're how the Zemis women speak
Speaker 1: a lot.
Speaker 2: I don't think it's just the Zeo. I think that's
Speaker 2: all women.
Speaker 1: Man. No, Yeah, you're fair particular way of pushing each
Speaker 1: other and I and I've come to love that and
Speaker 1: learn it.
Speaker 2: I think that the biggest thing that we've grown and
Speaker 2: has been our communication, which is in that realm. I
Speaker 2: think we're a lot like we've reached deeper levels of communication. Again,
Speaker 2: it's almost i'd be curious of other people who are
Speaker 2: married or have been with partners for a long time.
Speaker 2: Please shoot me a DM if you understand this or
Speaker 2: can put it in better words than I am right now.
Speaker 2: I never felt we had bad communication, but I have
Speaker 2: now seen us unlock new levels of depth of communication,
Speaker 2: of vulnerability with each other that I didn't know we
Speaker 2: could even achieve, which makes me really excited for where
Speaker 2: our marriage will go from here.
Speaker 1: And it takes effort, you know. I think. I think
Speaker 1: when you get married off and you're like, okay, good, like.
Speaker 2: We're good, I'm set, I got my person.
Speaker 1: And it's easy because then you get back to life,
Speaker 1: it's like, okay, now we got the kids and we
Speaker 1: got jobs, and we got you know, you just kind
Speaker 1: of start cruising. And even when you're happy, Uh, those
Speaker 1: are the times you kind of have to really push
Speaker 1: yourselves to try harder because when you are experiencing bliss
Speaker 1: and whether you're newly married or just things are good
Speaker 1: in life, it's you got to really push each other
Speaker 1: to challenge each other to continue to communicate and go deeper.
Speaker 1: It's easy to kind of hit the pause button and
Speaker 1: just cruise control. And I do think we have fought
Speaker 1: that hard this year. And really, you're you're great at
Speaker 1: You're better than I am. It's one of the great
Speaker 1: attributes you have given to me of don't just hit
Speaker 1: cruise control, and you really got to work at that.
Speaker 1: You're better at that than I am. You think, so, yeah,
Speaker 1: you're you're you're overall you're a better communicator than I am.
Speaker 2: I agree with that. You're you're not a bad communicator.
Speaker 1: But no, I'm not I I and I won't even
Speaker 1: say for a guy, because you know, that's such a
Speaker 1: sexist thing to say, and guys aren't that bad, and
Speaker 1: we get a bad rap for that. But you are
Speaker 1: a better communicator because you and I think you come
Speaker 1: about it honestly, not only with your family but your friends.
Speaker 1: You come from a great group of women who are
Speaker 1: such good communicators, and that's really rare, even for women.
Speaker 1: I think it's rare. And so you're just better. You're
Speaker 1: more intentional, you're more intense, and those things are important.
Speaker 1: You need that and you've taught me to be better
Speaker 1: at that, thanks Anny. Yeah, honestly, if and when we
Speaker 1: get back to work, I think I'll be even better
Speaker 1: at what I used to do. Oh wow, at asking
Speaker 1: questions and really driving.
Speaker 2: I agree. And I won't get this right. But there's
Speaker 2: some it's a marriage therapist out there, someone who has
Speaker 2: a quote about like how relationships are the best form
Speaker 2: of therapy, And I think that's so true. Where do
Speaker 2: we learn the most about ourselves through our relationships with others?
Speaker 2: Where we challenge to be better through our relationships with
Speaker 2: and marriage has got to be number one on that,
Speaker 2: and a good relationship, friendship or romantic will be one
Speaker 2: that pushes you to be better. And I'm just so
Speaker 2: grateful I you know, I yeah, Like you were just saying,
Speaker 2: when you kind of get into the day and day out,
Speaker 2: I mean, I'm trying. I'm really trying to reflect on
Speaker 2: this past year and everything that's happened and things that
Speaker 2: we've done, and sometimes it can all run together. But
Speaker 2: I do think we're in really happy years right now,
Speaker 2: which I'm really thankful for. Is there anything you want
Speaker 2: to achieve in the next year of our marriage.
Speaker 1: I mean in our lives together. I just like that.
Speaker 1: What I really enjoy is us just striving together and
Speaker 1: working together. I didn't I was there was moments of
Speaker 1: trepidation of like, oh, should we work together, you know,
Speaker 1: because I've heard pluses and minuses for couples working together.
Speaker 1: But I've really enjoyed working with you and seeing that
Speaker 1: side of your brain. I always loved it and respected
Speaker 1: it from afar when I was like watching you at
Speaker 1: entertainment tonight or you know, when you were interviewing me
Speaker 1: and interviewing other people, I got to see you and
Speaker 1: I knew you were good, but working by your side
Speaker 1: is different, and how we speak to each other at
Speaker 1: times and work is different than in our love life,
Speaker 1: and so learning that balance and that back and forth
Speaker 1: has also been good for us, and I think we've
Speaker 1: done a good job of that this year. So that's
Speaker 1: I think that's what I look forward to. As you said,
Speaker 1: we're in a good season, and God bless us. I
Speaker 1: hope that season continues there. You know, there will be
Speaker 1: a fall in a winter to life. There always is,
Speaker 1: but right now it's it's wonderful and now I'm excited
Speaker 1: to kind of see what our next chapter is and
Speaker 1: what this next year will bring.
Speaker 2: At the anniversary, Babe, I love you.
Speaker 1: And I think the most like hopeful thing and loving
Speaker 1: thing I can say is I wish we were doing
Speaker 1: it again tonight. I wish we were getting dressed right
Speaker 1: now and getting ready to go back to the same
Speaker 1: party that we had last year.
Speaker 2: I truly feel so thankful that I look back on
Speaker 2: our wedding and think I would do that night over
Speaker 2: and over and over again. I really would dance all
Speaker 2: night long with the people you love, to.
Speaker 1: All our friends and family, to everybody that was here,
Speaker 1: all the vacter nation that showed up. We love you.
Speaker 1: It's been so fun to go back and look at
Speaker 1: the pictures, the videos, and one more tip as I
Speaker 1: close this out and we wrap up this episode, save
Speaker 1: something you know I used to save that top tier
Speaker 1: of wedding cake for the anniversary. Save a video, save
Speaker 1: some pictures, Save something for anniversaries when you get a
Speaker 1: year later and you have perspective and it might just
Speaker 1: look it might rekindle something, but it also just might
Speaker 1: remind you of that love and how great it was
Speaker 1: and that you want to do it all over again.
Speaker 1: And thank you guys for letting us share our love
Speaker 1: with you. It's been a great adventure this first year.
Speaker 1: Happy anniversary, babe, I love you and here's to many,
Speaker 1: many more. Thanks for listening. Follow us on Instagram at
Speaker 1: the Dramatic pod ever, and make sure to write us
Speaker 1: a review and leave us five stars. I'll talk to
Speaker 1: you next time.