WEBVTT - A Delicate Waltz with Jessie James Decker 0:00:01.880 --> 0:00:07.320 Wine Down with Janet Kramer and I Heart Radio Podcast. Well, 0:00:09.280 --> 0:00:13.800 we have a lot to discuss. Um the band is 0:00:13.880 --> 0:00:18.480 back together. There was a reason why Katherine was not 0:00:18.680 --> 0:00:23.560 on the last few episodes. It was because she's in love. 0:00:24.360 --> 0:00:27.680 She doesn't get who knows it and she needed some 0:00:27.720 --> 0:00:33.280 time to go through that. Uh, Katherine, why don't you 0:00:33.280 --> 0:00:35.639 just take the floor, Katherine? Is it someone we know? Yeah, 0:00:35.840 --> 0:00:37.760 tell us you're in love and we want to know 0:00:37.840 --> 0:00:41.240 who it is. Give us a clue. Let's let's play 0:00:41.280 --> 0:00:43.480 the like, let's play the guessing game. Who is Cat 0:00:43.560 --> 0:00:47.160 in love with? Is it someone you met on Hinge? 0:00:48.720 --> 0:00:54.760 Absolutely not? Also Hinge lasted all of Like, does he 0:00:54.880 --> 0:01:01.640 have any kids? He does? Oh? Does he have one kid? Nope? 0:01:01.920 --> 0:01:06.280 Two kids? Does he have three? Yes? Yes? Three? Does 0:01:06.280 --> 0:01:12.280 he want more kids? Absolutely not. Is that part of 0:01:12.280 --> 0:01:17.200 the reason that you're in love with him? It's actually scheduled? 0:01:18.200 --> 0:01:22.640 Oh really? Oh yeah? Wow? Okay, so there's a great 0:01:22.640 --> 0:01:27.640 amount of intimacy in your relationship. Well we have to 0:01:27.720 --> 0:01:31.160 worry about snipping. Well, that's great that we've become intimate 0:01:32.280 --> 0:01:38.800 with who y'all are so funny? Okay, So Nick and 0:01:38.840 --> 0:01:45.080 I are not getting divorced. Some people here have called it. 0:01:45.920 --> 0:01:48.520 You know. Also, how many times did I say are 0:01:48.560 --> 0:01:51.560 you sure? Are you sure? Because everyone thinks that I'm 0:01:51.640 --> 0:01:57.120 like the reason, like the chat's blowing up, wow yeah um, 0:01:57.520 --> 0:02:00.800 because it's like literally everyone was like she just wanted 0:02:00.840 --> 0:02:02.840 to be single, Janna Janna as the reason because she 0:02:03.040 --> 0:02:05.400 just likes miserable people, like she wants to be miserable 0:02:05.400 --> 0:02:07.600 without people. And I'm like, y'all, I'm like, after every 0:02:07.640 --> 0:02:09.720 like after the more work you've done, I'm like, Kavin, 0:02:09.800 --> 0:02:11.840 are you sure? Are you sure you don't want to 0:02:11.840 --> 0:02:14.000 be back together with Nick? Like? And the funny thing 0:02:14.040 --> 0:02:16.600 about it is like I really kept towards the end 0:02:16.639 --> 0:02:19.160 a lot of that to myself, a lot of it, 0:02:19.200 --> 0:02:21.320 like we didn't even talk about it that much, like 0:02:21.440 --> 0:02:23.800 right in the beginning though I did though for sure, 0:02:24.200 --> 0:02:28.040 I'm saying before like making the decision, when people are 0:02:28.080 --> 0:02:30.440 like you like convinced me or whatever, it's like we 0:02:30.440 --> 0:02:32.720 didn't even really divorced about it. Yeah, I know. That's 0:02:32.720 --> 0:02:34.000 why I was like, well, I remember when you came 0:02:34.040 --> 0:02:36.040 over and I was like what, yeah, Like, I mean 0:02:36.120 --> 0:02:38.600 through the years, I wish and discussed, but yeah, I 0:02:38.639 --> 0:02:40.519 just didn't really talk to anybody about it. It was 0:02:40.560 --> 0:02:44.600 like me and my therapist, you know, so whatever to 0:02:44.720 --> 0:02:48.960 those people. But those people call people miserable as they 0:02:48.960 --> 0:02:51.480 sit behind their keyboards and have opinions about everybody as 0:02:51.560 --> 0:02:56.399 his life. Yeah, but anyway to shame. So anyway. Yeah, So, um, 0:02:56.600 --> 0:02:59.880 long story short, Um, about a month and a half ago, month, 0:03:00.000 --> 0:03:03.000 a little over a month ago. UM, we just kind 0:03:03.000 --> 0:03:05.280 of started working on things. You know, long story short. 0:03:05.320 --> 0:03:08.000 I won't go into all the details, but um, obviously 0:03:08.040 --> 0:03:11.040 everyone knows a lot of our issues, you know, stemmed 0:03:11.040 --> 0:03:15.760 around me and my lack of vulnerability, vulnerability and intimacy, 0:03:16.000 --> 0:03:19.760 and that's just something I knew I had to work on. Um. 0:03:19.880 --> 0:03:22.240 And as I was starting to kind of work on 0:03:22.280 --> 0:03:24.839 myself and a lot of prayer, praying about it a lot, 0:03:24.880 --> 0:03:28.040 a lot, UM, I just kind of kept going back 0:03:28.080 --> 0:03:30.000 to him like he was my safe place, and I 0:03:30.040 --> 0:03:31.760 was like, oh, I have to start here. You know, 0:03:31.800 --> 0:03:34.120 there's things I need to say to him. Even if 0:03:34.120 --> 0:03:37.160 you were to not get back to kind yeah, there 0:03:37.240 --> 0:03:39.920 was not. At first. That wasn't the goal. Yeah, the 0:03:40.000 --> 0:03:43.360 goal was just to open up, tell him how I felt. 0:03:43.760 --> 0:03:45.960 In the beginning, it was like we're getting divorced, after 0:03:46.000 --> 0:03:47.440 fifteen years, and I need to tell him. I think 0:03:47.440 --> 0:03:49.480 he's a great dad. I think that he did was 0:03:49.520 --> 0:03:51.840 a great husband, you know those things. But as it 0:03:51.920 --> 0:03:53.720 kind of went on and I was able to like 0:03:53.880 --> 0:03:56.440 dig into my emotions, it's like I realized like that 0:03:56.480 --> 0:03:58.280 I didn't want to lose him, you know, that he 0:03:58.400 --> 0:04:01.960 was my best friend. I just wasn't a too open 0:04:02.080 --> 0:04:03.920 up and I needed to work on that. So I 0:04:03.960 --> 0:04:06.840 started to work on that. But it just happened to 0:04:06.840 --> 0:04:08.600 be that I wanted to work on it with him, 0:04:08.640 --> 0:04:10.840 you know, And so it just kind of overtime. So 0:04:10.880 --> 0:04:12.480 I mean we were sneaking around because we don't want 0:04:12.480 --> 0:04:14.400 we didn't tell our kids. So it was like, you know, 0:04:14.480 --> 0:04:15.920 he had a rental and I had my house. Like 0:04:15.960 --> 0:04:18.680 we were literally like sneaking, Like he got a rental car. 0:04:18.720 --> 0:04:24.960 I was like chool. I felt like high school, but 0:04:25.000 --> 0:04:26.960 I never even did that and called a sack. I 0:04:27.000 --> 0:04:28.880 didn't either. I just said that I didn't do that 0:04:28.880 --> 0:04:32.320 in high school. Either. Had fun at thirty eight, but 0:04:32.360 --> 0:04:35.520 like we went on, I planned like a little vacation 0:04:35.560 --> 0:04:37.760 at the beginning, or just like a night out and 0:04:37.760 --> 0:04:40.400 I was like, wait, do we even get to ride together? 0:04:40.480 --> 0:04:42.160 Like where do I put my car? And we were 0:04:42.200 --> 0:04:44.680 going to meet at this one place, but like the 0:04:44.720 --> 0:04:47.760 whole town was there, so it's like we can't go there. 0:04:47.880 --> 0:04:50.560 We don't do town stuff. So we went to a 0:04:50.680 --> 0:04:54.760 gas station outside of town, parked my car, met and drove. 0:04:54.880 --> 0:04:58.520 You know, So but what have fun? Like so fun? Yeah, 0:04:58.800 --> 0:05:01.760 and falling in love all her again. Yeah, when I 0:05:01.800 --> 0:05:05.480 think to like, I remember one of the times when 0:05:05.520 --> 0:05:08.599 it came over as a friend. My god, I don't 0:05:08.680 --> 0:05:13.480 know that, but like I remember him being like Catherine 0:05:13.480 --> 0:05:16.200 was vulnerably vulnerable with me for the first time, and 0:05:16.200 --> 0:05:18.640 I'm like, Nick, I'm like, well maybe y'all can you 0:05:18.640 --> 0:05:20.279 know And he's like no, He's like I don't think. 0:05:20.400 --> 0:05:22.920 He was like I don't know, but I'm like, like 0:05:23.000 --> 0:05:25.440 you were opening up, like he was like welcoming the 0:05:25.520 --> 0:05:27.520 opening up, and I'm just like, I don't know. There's 0:05:27.520 --> 0:05:29.280 always a piece of me that actually it was just 0:05:29.320 --> 0:05:32.359 like that's why I kept saying, like I'm sure there's 0:05:32.440 --> 0:05:34.960 nothing there, like you don't mean to try because it's 0:05:34.960 --> 0:05:37.560 like he's because it's like you kept saying that he's 0:05:37.600 --> 0:05:40.320 my best friend, and I'm like, then what is the problem, right? So, yeah, 0:05:40.480 --> 0:05:43.200 you just need to. I mean like, yeah, well yeah, 0:05:43.320 --> 0:05:45.640 but I think it was the intendency block, right, Like 0:05:45.680 --> 0:05:47.680 I'll never forget you saying that to me. And You're like, 0:05:47.680 --> 0:05:49.279 well do you think you could? And I was like nope, 0:05:49.279 --> 0:05:50.920 and I just shut down. I just put my wall back. 0:05:51.120 --> 0:05:54.880 I remember. I remember literally like I can't even talk 0:05:54.920 --> 0:05:59.760 about it. Um yeah, we're like as not as no. 0:06:00.000 --> 0:06:04.520 I was like, I love it. Speak time I talked 0:06:04.520 --> 0:06:07.680 about it, I would absolutely tear up. But I'm learning now. 0:06:07.960 --> 0:06:10.559 I guess it's just I know it. I'm very aware 0:06:10.600 --> 0:06:12.440 of it when I do it again. I remember in 0:06:12.480 --> 0:06:15.000 the car, just like shut it down, you know. And 0:06:15.040 --> 0:06:17.440 so that's what I always did in our marriage, and 0:06:17.520 --> 0:06:20.599 so I mean, honestly, I know it sounds very cliche, 0:06:20.760 --> 0:06:23.560 but like I literally just get up every morning and 0:06:23.600 --> 0:06:25.840 I say the same prayer every morning, and it's just 0:06:25.920 --> 0:06:28.360 like it's a day by day thing for me. Just 0:06:28.440 --> 0:06:31.120 to keep my heart heart open is the biggest thing. 0:06:31.240 --> 0:06:34.920 And to just keep you know, pursuing it and showing up. 0:06:35.080 --> 0:06:37.880 I mean I think that that's always There were always 0:06:37.880 --> 0:06:40.600 things that I knew I should do, that would pop 0:06:40.600 --> 0:06:42.800 into my head that I should say all those things 0:06:42.839 --> 0:06:44.560 and I just didn't do it. You know, we were 0:06:44.640 --> 0:06:48.039 just so far just like in our corners that I 0:06:48.080 --> 0:06:50.240 didn't do it and he didn't. You know, he gave 0:06:50.360 --> 0:06:53.720 up to It's like we both kind of gave up. Um, 0:06:53.760 --> 0:06:56.200 so anyway, so yeah, so now it's just like, so, 0:06:56.240 --> 0:06:59.719 what does the road look like now? You know, we 0:06:59.800 --> 0:07:02.120 did tell the kids, so the kids are aware. Um, 0:07:02.240 --> 0:07:04.080 they were definitely starting to pick up on it. You 0:07:04.080 --> 0:07:06.000 know when we told them. My thirteen year old was 0:07:06.040 --> 0:07:07.720 like I knew it, you know. So I mean like 0:07:08.240 --> 0:07:11.800 so yeah, um, and what a inspiring thing for them 0:07:11.800 --> 0:07:14.520 to witness to. Yeah, that's what I'm like. That was like, 0:07:14.640 --> 0:07:17.160 I can't I was how happy were they? I can't 0:07:17.280 --> 0:07:24.000 imagine liked story the video. I have a video and 0:07:24.000 --> 0:07:27.040 an the best because I mean she cried throughout the day. 0:07:27.160 --> 0:07:29.600 I mean it was the sweetest thing. And she's constantly 0:07:29.600 --> 0:07:32.320 like that makes me want to cry. She yeah, I 0:07:32.360 --> 0:07:34.720 mean she's constantly even now she's like, hey go his dad, 0:07:34.800 --> 0:07:36.680 Hey go hold his hand, hey go, Like she just 0:07:36.720 --> 0:07:40.720 so badly wanted to see affection, you know. Um. It's 0:07:40.760 --> 0:07:43.680 such good groundwork for them that before you go to 0:07:43.720 --> 0:07:45.000 the next thing, I just want to say something I 0:07:45.000 --> 0:07:47.480 just wrote downside and forget it. I when I was 0:07:47.480 --> 0:07:51.520 looking on Instagram, I was like, I noticed, by the way, However, 0:07:51.760 --> 0:07:55.000 fifteen years that i've known you and Nick together, I've 0:07:55.080 --> 0:07:58.960 never seen your hand on his shoulder, arm and leg. 0:07:59.040 --> 0:08:01.520 And I was like, who crap. I was like Cat 0:08:01.560 --> 0:08:03.920 put her hand on his shoulder at the football game 0:08:04.320 --> 0:08:07.320 physical I was like, go, girl, go. I ran into 0:08:07.360 --> 0:08:09.880 them at a birthday party on Sunday and I was like, well, 0:08:09.920 --> 0:08:14.160 look who it is on the love seat, literally like 0:08:14.360 --> 0:08:18.000 real side touching close. I mean I usually used to 0:08:18.080 --> 0:08:20.720 make my skin crawl. That sounds terrible, but that's what 0:08:21.040 --> 0:08:22.720 Mike was. He'd be like, every time you touched me, 0:08:22.800 --> 0:08:27.800 my skin crawls. And I'm like, oh, it feels really 0:08:27.840 --> 0:08:30.800 good for you to say that. It sounds terrible, but 0:08:30.880 --> 0:08:33.920 it's it's hard to explain it, truly, it's hard to explain. 0:08:34.440 --> 0:08:36.360 So is the road trying to figure out where the 0:08:36.440 --> 0:08:39.840 intimacy block comes or like what is like we've hit 0:08:39.960 --> 0:08:43.680 I think we've destroyed the intimacy block from my understand Honestly, 0:08:43.800 --> 0:08:48.360 I think I was just able to. It started with 0:08:48.440 --> 0:08:51.400 just a very vulnerable conversation and it was hard and 0:08:51.520 --> 0:08:53.760 it was not easy to have that conversation. But once 0:08:53.840 --> 0:08:56.160 I was able to, and I literally broke down. I'll 0:08:56.200 --> 0:08:59.480 just be honest, like complete breakdown. At this point, I 0:08:59.559 --> 0:09:02.040 have nothing thing to lose kind of thing, you know, 0:09:02.240 --> 0:09:06.040 then it was just easier. Um. You know, of course, 0:09:06.120 --> 0:09:07.880 I you know, I think that's always going to be 0:09:07.960 --> 0:09:09.360 a part of me, and I think I'm always going 0:09:09.400 --> 0:09:11.560 to have to constantly work at it. Um. And he's 0:09:11.559 --> 0:09:13.560 aware of that, and we have a lot of conversation 0:09:13.600 --> 0:09:16.040 about it. But I'm just you know, like sometimes I 0:09:16.080 --> 0:09:18.760 don't even notice it when I'm touching him. Now sometimes 0:09:18.840 --> 0:09:21.240 I have to tell myself to do it. It's kind 0:09:21.240 --> 0:09:23.599 of a mix, and I think that's okay to like 0:09:23.679 --> 0:09:28.199 I remember, like with Mike, it's like he's like I 0:09:28.320 --> 0:09:31.520 have to physically like touch her leg. And as hard 0:09:31.559 --> 0:09:33.280 as it is for like me to like be like, well, 0:09:33.320 --> 0:09:35.000 why wouldn't you want to, It's like I know that 0:09:35.080 --> 0:09:36.800 he's like trying, and I think that's all Nick probably 0:09:36.840 --> 0:09:39.400 wants to. It's just like the effort put in where 0:09:39.480 --> 0:09:41.920 like the effort was lost, you know, well it becomes 0:09:42.040 --> 0:09:45.280 just like a habit over eventually, yeah, where you're just 0:09:45.640 --> 0:09:48.400 become business partners essentially a room exactly, and that's the 0:09:48.440 --> 0:09:52.040 tricky part because the undoing of that is so frustrating 0:09:52.200 --> 0:09:57.400 and long and hope lost. Yeah, and I think, you know, 0:09:57.520 --> 0:10:01.120 it's it's interesting because, you know, I definitely choosing to 0:10:01.240 --> 0:10:04.320 not regret the road that we took to get there. Um, 0:10:04.400 --> 0:10:07.640 I'm definitely seeing as it's all was blessed and it 0:10:07.720 --> 0:10:09.480 needed to happen that way. I think I had to 0:10:09.520 --> 0:10:13.000 get out of the situation and be broken to be 0:10:13.120 --> 0:10:17.640 able to like fix you know, what was broken essentially. Um, 0:10:17.840 --> 0:10:19.400 so I don't even regret that. You know. I was 0:10:19.400 --> 0:10:20.920 a little worried with the kids, like do I need 0:10:20.960 --> 0:10:22.400 to say I'm sorry that we put you through this? 0:10:22.440 --> 0:10:24.800 Blah blah blah blah. But it's like they're just happy, 0:10:25.640 --> 0:10:28.040 you know. And then they also saw us happy together, 0:10:28.559 --> 0:10:30.880 so it was you know, even so I think it's 0:10:30.920 --> 0:10:33.719 beautiful because they see all working like that's like what 0:10:33.840 --> 0:10:36.480 they should see is like you guys working towards it. 0:10:36.520 --> 0:10:38.679 Because again, it's not good for them just to see 0:10:38.720 --> 0:10:41.480 happy parents never fighting, right, It's not good just to 0:10:41.520 --> 0:10:43.040 see them fighting all the time. So it's like to 0:10:43.160 --> 0:10:45.320 show the like work and the commitment like, I think 0:10:45.400 --> 0:10:48.000 that's like what they should see now. If it was 0:10:48.280 --> 0:10:50.240 we're gonna get divorced again and three and then again 0:10:50.280 --> 0:10:51.840 and back and forth like that back and forth would 0:10:51.840 --> 0:10:53.800 be a lot on them. But like, you know, and 0:10:53.880 --> 0:10:55.760 that's why we waited, you know, we wanted you know, 0:10:55.760 --> 0:10:58.280 because that first week or so, it was very every 0:10:58.320 --> 0:11:00.719 conversation was if we do this, if we do this, 0:11:01.240 --> 0:11:03.199 and there was just like a point where it just 0:11:03.320 --> 0:11:05.959 kind of flipped. You know, I can't even explain it, 0:11:06.280 --> 0:11:08.319 but it just kind of flipped. It's like, we're doing this, 0:11:08.600 --> 0:11:10.880 you know, but we have to protect the kids. But 0:11:11.080 --> 0:11:12.280 because you know, at the end of the day, my 0:11:12.400 --> 0:11:15.880 whole thing was breaking the cycle because my parents did 0:11:15.920 --> 0:11:19.079 not show affection. They had the same issues. I just 0:11:19.800 --> 0:11:21.199 had to make a decision on which way I was 0:11:21.200 --> 0:11:22.839 going to break the cycle. And it was either we 0:11:22.920 --> 0:11:24.320 get out of this and then we go get other 0:11:24.400 --> 0:11:26.360 relationships and they're going to have to be healthy to 0:11:26.440 --> 0:11:28.400 show them. And then once I was out of it, 0:11:28.440 --> 0:11:31.120 I was like, I have to fix this no matter what, 0:11:31.720 --> 0:11:33.400 you know, and I'd rather do it with him and 0:11:33.440 --> 0:11:36.640 then go back and show him them what a healthy 0:11:36.720 --> 0:11:41.439 relationship should look like. So I mean, really big, giant, 0:11:42.559 --> 0:11:46.839 inspiring work. And I love personally that it happened the 0:11:46.880 --> 0:11:51.600 way it did for any like validation you may need 0:11:51.679 --> 0:11:53.920 from what a kid sees. I don't for some reason 0:11:54.040 --> 0:11:57.840 that that like the separation and you two learning yourselves 0:11:58.000 --> 0:12:00.640 enough and who's you are and then to come back 0:12:00.720 --> 0:12:03.840 to each other like that really is. That's like, that's 0:12:03.880 --> 0:12:07.680 the redemption story. That's huge. And let me say to y'all, 0:12:07.840 --> 0:12:10.560 I didn't even know it, but I found out later 0:12:11.000 --> 0:12:15.080 that um my ten year old Emmy and another person 0:12:15.160 --> 0:12:18.079 in our not immediate family, but in our family had 0:12:18.160 --> 0:12:21.560 been praying together for us to get back together like often, 0:12:21.920 --> 0:12:24.480 and so it's such a cool thing to be to 0:12:24.640 --> 0:12:27.559 show her like, look like your prayers were answered, you 0:12:27.679 --> 0:12:30.439 talked to God, you asked a very specific thing, and 0:12:30.520 --> 0:12:32.640 it happened, and may not have happened, you know, or 0:12:32.679 --> 0:12:34.280 if it didn't happen, like, but it was just a 0:12:34.360 --> 0:12:37.640 good time. It's a good thing to really show her. 0:12:37.920 --> 0:12:39.880 And I think it's been like really great for her 0:12:39.880 --> 0:12:42.360 because she's like, wow, like it really worked, you know. 0:12:42.800 --> 0:12:45.439 And I think it's like a good like sometimes you 0:12:45.960 --> 0:12:50.559 don't know what you have, but also like until you 0:12:50.640 --> 0:12:54.160 lose it. You know. It's like I think not that 0:12:54.240 --> 0:12:56.040 you ever like took Nick for grien or something like that, 0:12:56.200 --> 0:12:58.079 but like it's like you realize, like, well he was 0:12:58.160 --> 0:12:59.880 my best friend and he was like sometimes you don't 0:13:00.000 --> 0:13:02.920 realize those things until like you lose it, like and 0:13:03.000 --> 0:13:05.240 then again, like you're saying, like, no matter what, you're 0:13:05.240 --> 0:13:07.360 gonna have to work on yourself, whether it's with Nick, 0:13:07.400 --> 0:13:09.880 whether it's with the guy from Hinge, like you know 0:13:09.880 --> 0:13:12.160 what I mean, like whoever it is. And I think 0:13:12.240 --> 0:13:14.280 it's like that's the same thing. Like you know, I 0:13:14.320 --> 0:13:16.400 think we can all attest to that, like things within 0:13:16.520 --> 0:13:18.280 your marriage, things with me dating. I'm like, all right, 0:13:18.360 --> 0:13:20.960 like I have to change some stuff where I'm gonna 0:13:21.000 --> 0:13:23.040 keep picking the same I'm gonna keep doing the same thing. 0:13:23.080 --> 0:13:24.839 And it's like it's like we have we have to 0:13:24.920 --> 0:13:27.200 work on ourselves. It's not about the other persons about ourselves. 0:13:27.280 --> 0:13:30.400 And you find this shopping. But I'm not super affectionate, 0:13:31.320 --> 0:13:33.439 so you told me that, I know, And so I 0:13:33.520 --> 0:13:35.079 just don't want you to feel alone in that, like 0:13:35.240 --> 0:13:37.959 I have to sometimes, which I think would be unexpecting 0:13:38.080 --> 0:13:43.199 from people that would listen to me. So I'm not 0:13:43.520 --> 0:13:46.760 like I am with the kids excessively, like they're going 0:13:46.800 --> 0:13:48.839 to need a therapist for opposite reasons that I did. 0:13:49.000 --> 0:13:53.120 But like I'm not super affectionate with Preston enough either, 0:13:53.520 --> 0:13:55.600 and so I've had to work on that because I'm 0:13:55.679 --> 0:13:59.480 severely independent, and when I'm learning from Amy, our mutual therapist, 0:14:00.360 --> 0:14:04.000 is that my severe independence once was my survival tactic, 0:14:04.080 --> 0:14:06.800 but I don't need it anymore. And so I was 0:14:06.840 --> 0:14:08.800 going to ask you if that was but I didn't 0:14:08.800 --> 0:14:11.319 want to purchect if you will without a doubt that 0:14:11.440 --> 0:14:14.040 was me. But like I don't have to be Christen 0:14:14.120 --> 0:14:17.120 from Michigan all the time in that way like heart, 0:14:17.240 --> 0:14:19.080 you know, like I toughen up and I can take 0:14:19.120 --> 0:14:21.000 care of myself. But it's like, but I can also 0:14:21.160 --> 0:14:22.840 just be like, hey that hurt my feelings or hey 0:14:22.880 --> 0:14:26.960 I need this. And what's interesting is in a relationship 0:14:27.080 --> 0:14:31.000 sometimes somebody needs to know that they're needed. Very elementary. 0:14:31.120 --> 0:14:33.600 But for some reason I missed the memo that it 0:14:33.760 --> 0:14:36.120 served us when we needed it to serve us, and 0:14:36.240 --> 0:14:39.160 in our lifestyle, my lifestyle at home, it does serve 0:14:39.240 --> 0:14:41.800 me because he's gone so much that me being independent 0:14:41.840 --> 0:14:44.680 and handling life and you know, being mom and dad 0:14:44.720 --> 0:14:46.320 when I need to be a husband and wife when 0:14:46.320 --> 0:14:49.320 I need to be is like okay, but I'm also 0:14:49.440 --> 0:14:53.400 working on that well. Because independence, I've I've learned can 0:14:53.440 --> 0:14:55.360 be a positive and such a negative. It can be 0:14:55.560 --> 0:14:59.560 both and it's just learning arts, yeah for sure, but yeah, 0:14:59.600 --> 0:15:02.400 absolut there's so much about independence that keeps serving me. 0:15:02.520 --> 0:15:04.200 But there's a lot of things I can just lay 0:15:04.240 --> 0:15:07.400 down and honestly, it was exhausting still using independence and 0:15:07.760 --> 0:15:10.280 pieces of that. You know what's like interesting too, like 0:15:10.440 --> 0:15:12.040 just like hearing that and reflecting on it. Is like 0:15:13.200 --> 0:15:17.680 when I when there's someone that likes me, I'm actually 0:15:17.880 --> 0:15:21.200 not as affectionate, but like I'm more affectionate to those 0:15:21.320 --> 0:15:23.480 that like I feel like I have to like oh 0:15:24.040 --> 0:15:27.440 like proving, like proving or like to like chase to 0:15:27.640 --> 0:15:30.000 to chase like those people I'm more affectionate with. And 0:15:30.040 --> 0:15:32.440 the guys that like I know that would want to 0:15:32.480 --> 0:15:34.520 be with me, it's like, oh no, like this because 0:15:34.520 --> 0:15:37.240 it feels foreign, foreign to have the guys actually like 0:15:37.320 --> 0:15:39.840 showing me affection Like no joke. Flowers showed up in 0:15:39.880 --> 0:15:41.240 my house and I was like, who are these from? 0:15:41.720 --> 0:15:43.320 You know what I mean? Like this must be before 0:15:43.320 --> 0:15:46.960 my grandpa. Like that guy doesn't send flowers, you know, 0:15:47.280 --> 0:15:52.240 so good guys do send flower But it's like I 0:15:52.320 --> 0:15:54.680 see that I'm just saying like that. I was like, 0:15:54.720 --> 0:15:56.200 oh my gosh. I was like, I'm actually not as 0:15:56.400 --> 0:15:59.520 touchy with people that like, because it's like it's scary 0:16:00.360 --> 0:16:03.400 in like foreign. Yeah. I think the fear of rejection. 0:16:03.560 --> 0:16:06.200 If I went back through all my relationships and saw 0:16:07.400 --> 0:16:10.720 I really dated some winners, um, but there was so 0:16:10.800 --> 0:16:13.280 many like hurtful comments that I think my vulnerability got 0:16:13.360 --> 0:16:14.680 shut out a little bit. And I was like, well, 0:16:14.680 --> 0:16:17.280 I'll just guard myself then, because clearly you guys can't 0:16:17.320 --> 0:16:18.560 take care of me. And then I made it a 0:16:18.640 --> 0:16:21.000 gender wide pandemic in my brain. So then I was like, 0:16:21.120 --> 0:16:23.760 none of them can be trusted. And then God gave me. 0:16:25.000 --> 0:16:27.480 God gave me legend, my son, and I was like, well, 0:16:27.680 --> 0:16:30.200 now here's a turn of events on plot twist, because 0:16:30.200 --> 0:16:32.520 I'm going to have to learn how to love this 0:16:33.240 --> 0:16:35.080 I can't wait to hear the messages you get about 0:16:35.080 --> 0:16:36.680 me saying that, but like, I'm gonna have to learn 0:16:36.720 --> 0:16:40.160 to love this gender so much more differently and fullhearted. No, 0:16:40.480 --> 0:16:43.280 I mean they're not all lumped together anymore. I had 0:16:43.320 --> 0:16:46.800 to start picking them apart. You know, well I meant, 0:16:46.880 --> 0:16:49.240 I mean truly, I mean, and again, I don't want 0:16:49.240 --> 0:16:52.280 you to think like nothing is rainbows and butterflies, Like 0:16:52.600 --> 0:16:54.320 you're going to have hard times in your marriage. You're 0:16:54.320 --> 0:16:56.360 gonna have hard times, like you're gonna have great times. 0:16:56.360 --> 0:16:58.520 You're gonna amazing times. And it's like no matter what, 0:16:58.760 --> 0:17:01.720 like we all go through struggles and you guys, you know, 0:17:01.800 --> 0:17:04.200 worked it out and that's amazing, like truly, like that's 0:17:04.240 --> 0:17:06.280 like we don't get to pick how how it's broken 0:17:06.320 --> 0:17:09.720 apart sometimes to be healed. Yeah, I just think that's great. 0:17:09.960 --> 0:17:12.200 And even when like in your healing and you're still 0:17:12.280 --> 0:17:14.479 like having to go like, oh this is like it's okay, 0:17:14.760 --> 0:17:16.520 Like you're not like it's not going to be like 0:17:16.640 --> 0:17:19.840 we have the best marriage ever. It's okay. You still 0:17:20.000 --> 0:17:22.560 have like moments of like struggle and hard times. And 0:17:22.560 --> 0:17:24.720 I think that's a lot of people why people piece 0:17:24.760 --> 0:17:28.440 out so fast is because it's like, you know, you 0:17:28.560 --> 0:17:32.000 just and it's like because I mean, frick, as much 0:17:32.000 --> 0:17:33.680 as I would have loved to have pieced out, like 0:17:34.280 --> 0:17:36.119 the first time I heard about Mike cheating and like 0:17:36.119 --> 0:17:38.720 at the same time, it's like did the work to try? 0:17:38.800 --> 0:17:40.520 And it's like sometimes like you try and you try 0:17:40.560 --> 0:17:42.480 and you try, and it's like then you realize, like, okay, 0:17:42.520 --> 0:17:44.119 it's not working, and it's like for y'all, it's like 0:17:44.240 --> 0:17:46.320 you you guys chose to like you're trying together, and 0:17:46.400 --> 0:17:49.040 like that's beautiful no matter what, like and you can 0:17:49.160 --> 0:17:52.119 know regardless, like how that's a thing, like you know 0:17:52.359 --> 0:17:55.040 that you try because I think and this is what 0:17:55.200 --> 0:17:56.920 I had said to you, And I was like, I 0:17:57.359 --> 0:17:58.840 I said, I think bee this, I said this so 0:17:58.920 --> 0:18:02.960 nick to and so but I I was always fearful 0:18:03.040 --> 0:18:05.240 that you were going to regret leaving because you didn't 0:18:05.280 --> 0:18:08.560 try wholeheartedly. And I don't please, don't take that like no, 0:18:08.840 --> 0:18:10.560 it's the first thing I said. When I sat down 0:18:10.600 --> 0:18:12.320 with him, I started bawling and I was like, I 0:18:12.359 --> 0:18:14.639 don't feel like I tried. It was like there was 0:18:15.000 --> 0:18:16.920 there was two hard looking. I needed to make a 0:18:16.960 --> 0:18:18.480 decision because I'm a person that can't sit in that 0:18:18.560 --> 0:18:20.360 gray and I'm just like, I have to make a decision. 0:18:20.640 --> 0:18:22.600 This is hard and this is hard. Which hard am 0:18:22.640 --> 0:18:25.600 I going to choose? And I just chose that one 0:18:25.640 --> 0:18:27.840 and then realized, wait a minute, I still have to 0:18:27.920 --> 0:18:31.680 do the other hard for myself, you know. So yeah, no, 0:18:31.800 --> 0:18:35.119 you're right. That's literally the first thing I said. And 0:18:35.200 --> 0:18:37.200 I think even in the trying, like Janna is saying, 0:18:37.359 --> 0:18:41.600 when you try, even in the in the very least, 0:18:41.680 --> 0:18:43.959 you're still going to meet yourself somewhere you've never met 0:18:44.040 --> 0:18:46.800 yourself before. So even if it doesn't work relationship wise, 0:18:46.840 --> 0:18:50.840 you're still gaining momentum on yourself in your own coming 0:18:50.880 --> 0:18:53.080 back to yourself and all of it anyway, and now 0:18:53.200 --> 0:18:56.320 you'll know like you did everything, you tried everything, and 0:18:56.680 --> 0:18:59.000 you know, and don't feel like a failure if it's 0:18:59.560 --> 0:19:01.480 you know, who knows, like we just don't know, Like 0:19:01.600 --> 0:19:04.399 it's like as long as like that's why I was 0:19:04.440 --> 0:19:06.280 so not easy for me to because it as hard 0:19:06.320 --> 0:19:07.920 as hell to walk away. But I was also like, 0:19:08.119 --> 0:19:11.400 I try everything, and I can rest in my head 0:19:11.480 --> 0:19:14.160 like I can you know, you left nothing on the field. 0:19:14.720 --> 0:19:16.600 But but if I would have left six years ago, 0:19:16.880 --> 0:19:18.760 I would have been like, I wonder if we could 0:19:18.760 --> 0:19:21.080 have made it work, like I really, But then there's 0:19:21.080 --> 0:19:23.240 also like some you know, so as I'm just saying, like, no, 0:19:23.440 --> 0:19:26.320 matter what, Like, I'm proud of you for trying. Thank you, 0:19:26.520 --> 0:19:31.400 And honestly I understand your point of view more now 0:19:31.800 --> 0:19:33.239 because I think in the very beginning, we're like, why 0:19:33.240 --> 0:19:35.879 aren't you leaving? I'm like, but now I see that 0:19:36.000 --> 0:19:38.119 it's like, yeah, that regret and not that I necessarily 0:19:38.200 --> 0:19:42.040 was sitting in this place of regret, but you might have. Doubly, 0:19:42.400 --> 0:19:44.480 I think it would have caught up to you. Certainty 0:19:44.560 --> 0:19:46.800 turns in the regret. I think if you don't get 0:19:46.840 --> 0:19:49.520 certain about it, whatever way, you can understand why you 0:19:49.800 --> 0:19:53.320 had to be able to say I tried everything. Yeah, 0:19:53.359 --> 0:19:56.280 like I totally understand that now. I honestly think scar 0:19:56.400 --> 0:19:59.520 tissue in a relationship is hot. I think it's beautiful 0:19:59.640 --> 0:20:01.840 and I think like a favorite, like I wish my 0:20:02.080 --> 0:20:04.520 X and I like could have been the like that 0:20:04.600 --> 0:20:07.800 could have been our redemption story story. But it's beautiful 0:20:07.840 --> 0:20:11.920 scar tissue. We do like stunning scar tissue, a lot 0:20:11.960 --> 0:20:14.840 of it, But you really do. I mean, but you 0:20:15.000 --> 0:20:18.080 fought the good fight, no pun intended, but like, I 0:20:18.119 --> 0:20:19.800 don't forget to buy that book because it still matters. 0:20:20.240 --> 0:20:22.560 And my part was don't read the trust because that 0:20:22.720 --> 0:20:25.359 was all a lie. But it's to tell the truth. 0:20:25.760 --> 0:20:28.879 Let me tell you what all of that was a lie? Anyways, 0:20:29.480 --> 0:20:32.920 it was opposite day. I just feel like, but like 0:20:33.040 --> 0:20:35.680 you really did, like your scar tissue matters, because Jason 0:20:35.760 --> 0:20:37.480 Jolie have a scar tissue to fall back on. They 0:20:37.520 --> 0:20:40.720 saw two people go for it as hard as hard 0:20:40.760 --> 0:20:44.399 as they could. They didn't see either. But anyways, moving on, 0:20:44.720 --> 0:20:46.399 we all have good therapists and great. I think that 0:20:46.560 --> 0:20:51.320 there's redemption stories for every marriage. Whether it stays that's 0:20:51.359 --> 0:20:54.480 what I'm saying, or gets back together, y'all will have 0:20:54.640 --> 0:20:58.080 a redemption story each of you. I'm excited. Thanks. Yeah, 0:20:58.880 --> 0:21:01.280 it's amazing. And I came out of came out of 0:21:01.359 --> 0:21:04.639 the bathroom and I was like baby cat Nick her 0:21:04.680 --> 0:21:07.000 fighting together, and He's like, halleluja. Knew it was gonna happen. 0:21:08.000 --> 0:21:11.159 It's so funny how many people said that. Yeah. It's 0:21:11.200 --> 0:21:13.880 also interesting like when you get divorced, how many people 0:21:13.960 --> 0:21:16.280 you here go like, oh I saw that comment, or man, 0:21:16.359 --> 0:21:17.600 I don't know how you guys made it work. And 0:21:17.640 --> 0:21:20.160 then like to hear people say that about getting guy together. 0:21:20.200 --> 0:21:25.359 People saw that coming together. Okay, well we are about 0:21:25.400 --> 0:21:28.199 to get Jesse James Decker on. She's killing it right 0:21:28.240 --> 0:21:29.760 now and dancing with the stars, so let's get her 0:21:29.800 --> 0:21:50.560 on Jesse. You're in the dance studio. Hey, girls, let 0:21:50.640 --> 0:21:52.960 me do full screen here. You look gor I know 0:21:53.280 --> 0:21:58.440 what is happening. God, thanks, I'm exhausted. Um yeah, you've been. 0:21:59.080 --> 0:22:00.920 I mean obviously, because I feel like even when we 0:22:01.160 --> 0:22:02.920 ran into each other, I don't know, a month or 0:22:02.920 --> 0:22:04.400 so ago, You're like, I'm just all over the place, 0:22:04.440 --> 0:22:07.640 and then you started texting me, You're like what about 0:22:07.720 --> 0:22:09.040 Like I was like, who is your hair person? Was 0:22:09.119 --> 0:22:12.440 dancing the stars? And like what she questions? And I 0:22:12.560 --> 0:22:16.119 was like, what's going on? Tell me everything? Um, but 0:22:16.240 --> 0:22:20.640 were you hesitant to do the show? So the only 0:22:20.800 --> 0:22:23.639 reason why I was hesitant would just be like the 0:22:23.800 --> 0:22:28.280 time commitment, because you know we're I mean, you all 0:22:28.320 --> 0:22:30.760 know we're mothers and so like you've got kids, and 0:22:30.880 --> 0:22:32.680 that's the first thing that pops to my mind, is like, 0:22:32.800 --> 0:22:35.879 how the heck am I supposed to balance this? Because 0:22:36.000 --> 0:22:40.000 our kids conversed and so I think I needed to 0:22:40.160 --> 0:22:42.840 understand the schedule. And as soon as I was told 0:22:42.880 --> 0:22:46.040 I was going to be able to practice and rehearse 0:22:46.280 --> 0:22:48.880 in Nashville, that was a game changer for me because 0:22:48.960 --> 0:22:51.199 I don't know if it's always been like that, right, Um, 0:22:51.320 --> 0:22:53.600 you know you you definitely could. I mean I remember 0:22:54.080 --> 0:22:56.480 um when I did. I did most of mine um 0:22:56.760 --> 0:22:58.399 in l A. But the problem is I was touring 0:22:58.480 --> 0:23:00.159 to just like you know, you're doing shows you and 0:23:00.240 --> 0:23:02.920 I think you know, we, Katherine, you know, had to 0:23:03.000 --> 0:23:05.720 cancel a bunch of shows because towards the end of it, 0:23:05.800 --> 0:23:09.240 I'm like, I can't keep doing shows and rehearsal and 0:23:09.400 --> 0:23:11.080 be a mom. I'm like, I'm like, I don't even 0:23:11.240 --> 0:23:12.800 like and now I feel like I almost have a 0:23:12.840 --> 0:23:14.840 shot at it. So I'm like, so we started to 0:23:14.880 --> 0:23:18.159 cancel shows because it just got just um emotional, I 0:23:18.200 --> 0:23:19.879 mean emotionally but like physically, I mean all of it 0:23:20.040 --> 0:23:23.080 just like a lot. And then traveling you throw a 0:23:23.160 --> 0:23:25.680 flying and I don't know about y'all, but like I 0:23:26.000 --> 0:23:28.439 I know people that can get on planes and then 0:23:28.640 --> 0:23:31.480 get right back to business. It sucks the life out 0:23:31.520 --> 0:23:34.080 of me flying. It just drains me. And so you 0:23:34.200 --> 0:23:37.280 throw that in there and it's like but yeah, So 0:23:37.359 --> 0:23:38.680 as soon as I was asked to do what, I 0:23:38.720 --> 0:23:40.320 was like, I need to figure out what it is 0:23:40.400 --> 0:23:42.480 that I need to keep and what I can move 0:23:42.560 --> 0:23:44.240 and who will be cool with me moving some of 0:23:44.320 --> 0:23:46.440 these things around and some of these shows, because it 0:23:46.720 --> 0:23:48.960 is You're right, like, it's hard to do everything and 0:23:49.040 --> 0:23:51.920 juggle everything at once. Where do you think emotionally you 0:23:52.000 --> 0:23:56.720 are going into week three? I feel like I am 0:23:57.400 --> 0:24:00.159 more positive this week. Last week I was a little like, 0:24:01.000 --> 0:24:03.639 oh man, like, I don't I don't know how week like, 0:24:03.720 --> 0:24:06.119 I felt like week one and the first dance was 0:24:06.240 --> 0:24:09.959 so great, and then you know, the scores didn't totally 0:24:10.080 --> 0:24:12.080 reflect that, so I was like, dang, I don't I 0:24:12.160 --> 0:24:14.320 don't know. I'm not a dancer, so I don't know 0:24:14.400 --> 0:24:16.440 what's good and what's not good. So for me, I 0:24:16.520 --> 0:24:18.080 thought it was good, but I guess it wasn't. I 0:24:18.160 --> 0:24:20.800 don't know. And then week two I went into it 0:24:20.880 --> 0:24:24.600 more serious and just not as confident because I'm like, okay, 0:24:24.760 --> 0:24:26.720 like I better straighten my legs, I better do all 0:24:26.760 --> 0:24:30.439 these things. Now, going into a week three, I'm feeling 0:24:30.960 --> 0:24:34.600 really positive. I think about it. Everything that you've said, 0:24:34.680 --> 0:24:37.680 Jannah has been that. I refer to your little Dancing 0:24:37.720 --> 0:24:41.960 with the Stars calendar that you've given me, and you 0:24:42.560 --> 0:24:44.800 so because I literally said he I was like, okay, 0:24:44.880 --> 0:24:46.719 you're going to go through a wave of motions. Week one, 0:24:46.760 --> 0:24:48.400 it's gonna be fun, but then you're not gonnat the scores. 0:24:48.440 --> 0:24:50.000 Then you're gonna be like depressed, and like week four 0:24:50.040 --> 0:24:51.359 you're like you're gonna want to quit. And then like 0:24:51.440 --> 0:24:53.440 week said so, you get your best score ever, and 0:24:53.480 --> 0:24:55.440 then it's like so much fun. And it's like because 0:24:55.640 --> 0:24:57.440 they put you and then like that's that's the whole 0:24:57.440 --> 0:24:59.000 point too, like they're putting. They're not gonna give you 0:24:59.119 --> 0:25:01.360 like all eight or all nines. And and then it's 0:25:01.359 --> 0:25:03.280 also hard to when you see these people that are 0:25:03.880 --> 0:25:05.800 really good or the head dance before and you're like, 0:25:05.840 --> 0:25:08.199 well that's not fair, like I've never danced a day 0:25:08.240 --> 0:25:10.560 in my life. And but it's like but then they're 0:25:10.560 --> 0:25:12.440 going to give them low score. Like you just watch 0:25:12.520 --> 0:25:14.160 like it's it's all going to start like to turn, 0:25:14.200 --> 0:25:15.639 because then then they're going to be harder on you, 0:25:15.920 --> 0:25:17.560 harder on them, and then they'll be better on you. 0:25:17.760 --> 0:25:20.119 And it's like which week do you fight with your partner? 0:25:27.000 --> 0:25:30.200 I think me it's just like anyone that you're forming 0:25:30.280 --> 0:25:34.560 a partnership with or um a friendship, anything, there's there's 0:25:34.600 --> 0:25:36.919 always going to be those getting to know each other 0:25:37.119 --> 0:25:41.480 kinks speaking of my party, keeping to know each other 0:25:41.680 --> 0:25:44.440 things that you work through and it's like, you know, 0:25:44.560 --> 0:25:47.320 and I feel like we've done that really well. You know, 0:25:47.480 --> 0:25:49.879 last week we really got to know each other on 0:25:50.000 --> 0:25:52.440 it on even more so, and I just feel like 0:25:53.119 --> 0:25:57.240 we really are understanding one another, and I just think 0:25:57.280 --> 0:26:00.879 it makes for an even better partnership. Where do you 0:26:01.040 --> 0:26:04.840 think that you guys uh kind of bad? You know, 0:26:05.080 --> 0:26:07.719 um butt heads a little bit when it comes to training. 0:26:08.600 --> 0:26:10.560 He's just very passionate and I love that and I 0:26:10.680 --> 0:26:13.240 understand passion. I come from a really passionate family. I 0:26:13.320 --> 0:26:15.600 think the only time is like I just so it 0:26:15.720 --> 0:26:18.320 takes me a little longer to grasp certain things. So 0:26:18.400 --> 0:26:20.480 all I asked, where just a little grace period to 0:26:20.600 --> 0:26:23.920 like understand what I'm doing. Um, but I really think 0:26:23.960 --> 0:26:26.760 that we're working through those things. And it's like I 0:26:26.880 --> 0:26:28.520 have a pep in my step these last couple of 0:26:28.600 --> 0:26:32.800 days because I really feel like we're finding our way together. Um, 0:26:32.960 --> 0:26:35.600 who is your best friend on the show like dancing 0:26:35.720 --> 0:26:39.920 partner wise? Like that's that's on the show, Celeberty. I 0:26:40.040 --> 0:26:43.800 don't know yet. There's certain people you see more because 0:26:43.840 --> 0:26:46.880 I guess you're kind of in like a pod system. Um, 0:26:47.080 --> 0:26:49.000 and so I feel like there's certain people that you 0:26:49.080 --> 0:26:51.879 see consistently because they're dancing the same time of rehearsing 0:26:51.960 --> 0:26:54.600 the same time you. So I think I see Charlie 0:26:54.920 --> 0:26:58.680 and she Angela more than anyone, and so we I 0:26:58.800 --> 0:27:02.480 feel like I always chatted up and catch up with 0:27:02.680 --> 0:27:05.720 Mark and Charlie probably more than anyone because we seem 0:27:05.800 --> 0:27:08.320 to practice and rehearse the same time. And she's just 0:27:08.440 --> 0:27:10.760 so I love that, you know, she's and she's amazing too. 0:27:10.800 --> 0:27:13.520 I'm like so many people like incredible. When I watched 0:27:13.560 --> 0:27:15.879 the show, I was like, oh, man, like I would like, 0:27:16.000 --> 0:27:20.280 there's so many good dancers too on the show. Everyone seriously, 0:27:20.440 --> 0:27:23.760 like half of the squad is so incredible. I'm sitting 0:27:23.800 --> 0:27:25.680 there like with my mouth on the ground, being like, 0:27:25.800 --> 0:27:29.120 oh my god, they're so good. But they're like they 0:27:29.200 --> 0:27:33.320 look professional, like from a thirty thou feet perspective. To me, 0:27:33.480 --> 0:27:36.760 you fit there like it was but I mean that 0:27:37.119 --> 0:27:40.080 like truly though, Like it wasn't like one of those 0:27:40.119 --> 0:27:43.120 I was like, oh okay, you know, like because I mean, listen, 0:27:43.160 --> 0:27:44.600 if they tried to cast me with Dancing the Stars. 0:27:44.600 --> 0:27:46.240 You and you guys would feel really good about yourself. 0:27:46.359 --> 0:27:48.600 But it's like it just feels to me like a 0:27:48.680 --> 0:27:50.600 natural fit. So I feel like it's good that you 0:27:50.680 --> 0:27:52.639 feel positive this week because you should be because you 0:27:52.920 --> 0:27:54.600 you're meant to be there, and you should be there. 0:27:54.640 --> 0:27:59.280 You're a little booty shaker j j D. Let's not pretend. Well, 0:27:59.400 --> 0:28:03.240 thank you. I man, it's funny because you feel like 0:28:03.320 --> 0:28:06.160 you're a good dancer. Like growing up, there's I've always 0:28:06.160 --> 0:28:08.200 feel like I had rhythm, but you come into this 0:28:08.320 --> 0:28:12.080 and you were humbled immediately going. You might have natural rhythm, 0:28:12.200 --> 0:28:15.520 but like learning steps is a whole other level. Like Jenny, 0:28:15.520 --> 0:28:17.840 you made it look so easy and so effortless, Like 0:28:18.000 --> 0:28:21.840 I watched and I remember just thinking, like you you 0:28:22.000 --> 0:28:25.240 just made it look so easy, girl. I was the 0:28:25.400 --> 0:28:28.920 ice on your ribs. It was so hard. I mean that. 0:28:29.000 --> 0:28:30.920 And that's you know, when I said to you, I'm like, 0:28:30.960 --> 0:28:32.280 oh my god, that was a note. I was got 0:28:32.359 --> 0:28:34.480 to like, you know, stronger legs, stronger legs. I mean, 0:28:34.520 --> 0:28:36.399 Glad would just be like yelling at I mean like 0:28:36.520 --> 0:28:38.520 I am literally doing the best I can, like and 0:28:38.560 --> 0:28:40.560 I don't remember, and I'm sorry and I told you, like, 0:28:40.600 --> 0:28:43.640 it wasn't until like the maybe the day before where 0:28:43.640 --> 0:28:46.440 I'm like, Okay, it's starting to click. You know. It's 0:28:46.520 --> 0:28:48.680 like it's hard. But I mean at the same time, 0:28:48.760 --> 0:28:50.800 like I told you to like just have fun because 0:28:50.840 --> 0:28:54.560 it goes by so fast, And that is something that 0:28:54.640 --> 0:28:57.040 I've really tried to think, even though we're only going 0:28:57.080 --> 0:28:59.840 into week three, I've really tried to step in and go, Okay, 0:29:00.080 --> 0:29:02.760 remember to have fun. Jass, Like, I don't want to 0:29:02.880 --> 0:29:04.640 walk away from this and be like I should have 0:29:04.720 --> 0:29:06.520 enjoyed it more because I was so stressed out. Like 0:29:06.600 --> 0:29:10.560 it is stressful, it is so hard. You're challenging yourself. 0:29:10.600 --> 0:29:12.880 You're putting yourself in a situation you never have before, 0:29:12.920 --> 0:29:16.800 so it is heavy on you. But I do think 0:29:16.840 --> 0:29:18.920 about what you say every time. I, like Jama said 0:29:18.960 --> 0:29:21.600 to remember to just like enjoy myself. So I'm really 0:29:22.080 --> 0:29:23.720 trying to do it because I wish I could go 0:29:23.840 --> 0:29:26.200 back like that's how and like and just truly have 0:29:26.400 --> 0:29:29.920 fun with it and like and know that like your 0:29:30.000 --> 0:29:33.440 kids will be okay. They're always going to be okay. 0:29:33.480 --> 0:29:35.680 They've got you know, an amazing you have an amazing husband, 0:29:35.680 --> 0:29:38.560 amazing they have amazing dad, and it's like they're one 0:29:38.600 --> 0:29:39.760 of the things that the two I love when I 0:29:39.920 --> 0:29:42.479 went to your show at the Rhyme and like your 0:29:42.560 --> 0:29:45.320 kids are watching you, like live your dreams and be 0:29:45.480 --> 0:29:48.160 this boss ass babe, and like you know and just 0:29:48.320 --> 0:29:50.880 like run companies, kittenish and all these other things that 0:29:50.920 --> 0:29:53.400 you do. It's like you are showing your children like 0:29:53.520 --> 0:29:57.120 how to be like this amazing independent, strong woman and 0:29:57.280 --> 0:30:00.040 loving and nurturing and like like you come home and 0:30:00.120 --> 0:30:01.479 like you're cooking them the soup, and I'm like, how 0:30:01.560 --> 0:30:04.720 does she find the time? Like I'm microwaving chicken nuggets, 0:30:04.840 --> 0:30:06.880 like I'm just laying the recipes already in a book 0:30:06.920 --> 0:30:11.320 because she did that too, and damn it, just how 0:30:11.440 --> 0:30:13.760 is she doing this? And it's like you are showing 0:30:13.800 --> 0:30:15.880 it like your kids like just like I know, like 0:30:15.920 --> 0:30:17.200 you probably miss them right now and you want to 0:30:17.240 --> 0:30:19.800 be with them, but it's like you like they they 0:30:19.840 --> 0:30:21.880 are watching you, and you are giving them more from 0:30:21.960 --> 0:30:24.520 doing what you're doing than, like, you know, than being 0:30:25.640 --> 0:30:28.280 in their face for sure. And I have to keep 0:30:28.320 --> 0:30:29.920 in mind. Another friend told my book, this is a 0:30:29.960 --> 0:30:34.000 blimped time this time and like it may feel so 0:30:34.200 --> 0:30:37.200 long now but it's not. And so I do keep 0:30:37.240 --> 0:30:39.360 trying to tell myself that because like you, Jana, I'm 0:30:39.400 --> 0:30:42.200 in it. I'm freaking in it and I want to work, 0:30:42.280 --> 0:30:44.320 but I'm like I'm in it with with my kids 0:30:44.440 --> 0:30:46.560 and it's it's the most important thing to me in 0:30:46.600 --> 0:30:48.080 the whole world. But I do have to remember, like 0:30:48.200 --> 0:30:53.240 it's okay to do something for myself and try something 0:30:53.360 --> 0:30:56.840 new and challenge myself in a different way, like this 0:30:57.040 --> 0:30:58.920 is for me, this is for me to go. I'm 0:30:59.120 --> 0:31:02.680 putting myself out of a comfort zone and exhausting something 0:31:02.760 --> 0:31:05.440 that I've never done and it's okay, and it's like 0:31:05.520 --> 0:31:07.360 something I'm gonna be proud of one day when i 0:31:07.440 --> 0:31:09.920 step away from all this going, I can't believe I 0:31:10.040 --> 0:31:11.720 did that and I'm proud of myself for that, and 0:31:11.800 --> 0:31:14.400 it's like good for you. Yeah, I feel like we 0:31:14.480 --> 0:31:15.800 all need to do that, like I'll step out of 0:31:15.880 --> 0:31:17.640 something like That's why, Like Jess, I know we can't 0:31:17.680 --> 0:31:19.160 say the show, but like we both got asked to 0:31:19.160 --> 0:31:20.320 do a show, and I'm like, man, I want to 0:31:20.400 --> 0:31:21.920 do this because it would be so out of my 0:31:22.000 --> 0:31:25.240 comfort zone because I always stay in like like even yes, 0:31:25.320 --> 0:31:27.280 I'm driving on the expressway now, but I'm staying on 0:31:27.360 --> 0:31:29.280 the right lane. I don't get into the middle lanes 0:31:29.360 --> 0:31:32.520 like I stay in my comfort zone, like lane over 0:31:32.680 --> 0:31:36.760 Cramer Beef. It's like, I'm like, girl, we got places 0:31:36.840 --> 0:31:38.640 to go, and I see her over their Grandma pace 0:31:39.080 --> 0:31:42.160 to settled into that right lane. I'm the speed stir 0:31:42.280 --> 0:31:45.440 all the way and the other lang J J D 0:31:45.520 --> 0:31:47.600 and I are like pedal to the metal raising show 0:31:47.720 --> 0:31:52.360 actually on the side streets, not on this pressway. I know, 0:32:05.080 --> 0:32:07.520 is there. I mean, Jesse, we were talking about this 0:32:07.640 --> 0:32:10.960 in an episode. I know. We we talk just tooth 0:32:11.000 --> 0:32:13.200 and nail, just you and me, like on text with this, 0:32:13.320 --> 0:32:16.200 but like how you deal with hate is like so 0:32:16.440 --> 0:32:20.440 beautifully done, because I feel like you do get picked 0:32:20.440 --> 0:32:23.120 apart a lot, and like every time, like you know, 0:32:23.160 --> 0:32:24.800 and I say, I'm like a girl, I went down 0:32:24.880 --> 0:32:26.440 read it and you're like, why do you do that 0:32:26.600 --> 0:32:28.720 to yourself? You know, And it's like and it's like 0:32:28.840 --> 0:32:31.520 I always kind of listen to the things that you 0:32:31.680 --> 0:32:33.720 say because you have such a fresh take on it, 0:32:33.800 --> 0:32:36.720 and also like but then you also get vulnerable, like 0:32:36.760 --> 0:32:39.560 you're like when people were someone says something about your 0:32:39.600 --> 0:32:41.800 weight and I remember being like what is wrong with people? 0:32:41.920 --> 0:32:45.000 Like why are they like it's like, it's so hurtful 0:32:46.000 --> 0:32:48.920 it is. I think what happens is when you are 0:32:48.960 --> 0:32:51.880 in the spotlight and you put yourself out there, it 0:32:52.720 --> 0:32:55.040 people feel like they have a right to say what 0:32:55.160 --> 0:32:56.800 they want to say, and they would never say these 0:32:56.840 --> 0:32:59.120 things to you on the street, but it does put 0:32:59.200 --> 0:33:02.000 you in a place where people feel like they can 0:33:02.520 --> 0:33:05.760 be comfortable enough to give their opinion even when it's 0:33:05.800 --> 0:33:09.120 not nice. And I do think sometimes whenever we are 0:33:09.200 --> 0:33:12.520 texting about that, it is hurtful. And yes I did 0:33:12.640 --> 0:33:15.000 put on weight this summer, thank you for noticing that 0:33:15.120 --> 0:33:19.000 and acknowledging acknowledging that random person like thank you. It's 0:33:19.400 --> 0:33:22.480 it's the things that you already feel hard on yourself 0:33:22.560 --> 0:33:25.960 about that someone else is pointing out, and it is hard. 0:33:26.040 --> 0:33:28.000 We're human beings, and I do feel like people need 0:33:28.080 --> 0:33:31.080 to stop and realize that. But like we've said, it's 0:33:31.120 --> 0:33:33.880 never gonna go away. It will always be there and 0:33:34.040 --> 0:33:37.400 so but our perspective can change, and it goes for 0:33:37.520 --> 0:33:39.720 people that are in the spotlight or someone who's not 0:33:39.800 --> 0:33:42.520 on the spotlight. When people are saying hurtful things, you 0:33:42.680 --> 0:33:46.000 have to remember like they can't be happy. They can't 0:33:46.080 --> 0:33:49.240 be waking up feeling the sunshine on their face and 0:33:49.320 --> 0:33:51.800 happy to go about their day if they want to 0:33:51.880 --> 0:33:54.520 hurt people all day long. Hurt people, hurt people. It's 0:33:54.520 --> 0:33:58.000 a real thing. And so I try to sit back 0:33:58.160 --> 0:34:02.880 and have grace for those people now. And what's another 0:34:02.960 --> 0:34:07.640 word that I think of sometimes I guess perspective of that. 0:34:07.760 --> 0:34:10.080 They're they've got to be sad. They've got to be 0:34:10.200 --> 0:34:13.320 hurting every day, and I want to have sympathy instead 0:34:13.480 --> 0:34:15.640 and stop getting angry. It used to make me angry 0:34:15.719 --> 0:34:17.840 and used to make me want to cry all the 0:34:17.960 --> 0:34:20.120 time and look in the mirror going maybe I do 0:34:20.280 --> 0:34:23.440 have a big nose, maybe I am overweight, maybe all 0:34:23.600 --> 0:34:25.239 you know, all the things they want to point out. 0:34:25.760 --> 0:34:28.520 But I now have sympathy for those people, and I 0:34:29.719 --> 0:34:31.480 swear to God I pray for them at night now 0:34:31.680 --> 0:34:33.759 because and it makes me have more peace with it 0:34:33.840 --> 0:34:36.640 going you know what they're hurting. I can't imagine what 0:34:36.719 --> 0:34:38.799 their lives must be like to want to wake up 0:34:38.840 --> 0:34:41.040 every day and get on their computer and point out 0:34:41.080 --> 0:34:43.239 all the things that I already know about myself. So 0:34:43.360 --> 0:34:45.359 you just got to take a bath and go I'm 0:34:45.400 --> 0:34:47.399 gonna pray for them, and I'm gonna keep going about 0:34:47.440 --> 0:34:49.440 my business because they're not going to affect me. And 0:34:49.480 --> 0:34:53.920 I'm gonna be happy. That's a word. Yeah, I love that. 0:34:54.360 --> 0:35:00.200 But yeah it's I'm like quiet, like already it's tear well, 0:35:00.200 --> 0:35:02.759 but you just have to like even now, like you 0:35:02.840 --> 0:35:04.680 can't give it any more attention. It's like we have 0:35:04.840 --> 0:35:07.320 to now, like because the more attention you give it, 0:35:07.440 --> 0:35:09.680 the more it makes it real. So it's like I 0:35:09.760 --> 0:35:12.000 feel it. Yeah, we move on from it. I know. 0:35:12.160 --> 0:35:14.840 I went out on this one day with someone and 0:35:14.960 --> 0:35:17.640 they were starting to talk, Oh that's the ugly version 0:35:17.719 --> 0:35:19.640 of this person and like, oh my god, hiss like 0:35:20.160 --> 0:35:22.000 his his this, that and the other. And I'm like, 0:35:22.800 --> 0:35:25.960 people are so freaking mean. I'm like why, Like I'm 0:35:26.040 --> 0:35:29.000 just like, as long as I want to, that's all 0:35:29.080 --> 0:35:33.120 that matters, okay, Like hey mean, like it's like, donnan, 0:35:33.160 --> 0:35:34.840 you don't need to be mean like and say like 0:35:35.000 --> 0:35:37.520 hurtful things about other people. And they're it's like there's 0:35:37.560 --> 0:35:39.279 just some people who were never mean gold in high 0:35:39.320 --> 0:35:42.239 school and it shows. That's all I'll say for sure. 0:35:42.320 --> 0:35:45.880 And it's just and I think about that and there 0:35:45.920 --> 0:35:48.320 are the mean girls. Alan and I were just talking 0:35:48.360 --> 0:35:50.560 about that he had trouble in school where people were 0:35:50.600 --> 0:35:54.080 mean to him, and they Alan came here, tom my friend. 0:35:55.080 --> 0:35:59.160 They they were like hurtful for him. Who wanted to 0:35:59.200 --> 0:36:04.320 be a look at this guy. I got the privilege 0:36:04.360 --> 0:36:08.120 of dancing with Alan a few times when when Glub 0:36:08.239 --> 0:36:10.200 was sick, and you were just like, you're just the sweetest. 0:36:10.200 --> 0:36:11.360 When I found out she had you, I was like, 0:36:11.440 --> 0:36:13.680 he's the best. You'll love him. He's so kind. But 0:36:14.360 --> 0:36:16.160 it's interesting to say you got bully because so my 0:36:16.280 --> 0:36:18.640 son's and dance, I'm I'm you know, he's he's in 0:36:18.719 --> 0:36:21.720 hip hop now, and I'm like, man, so like boys, 0:36:21.960 --> 0:36:23.960 like what do I tell him when the kids bullying 0:36:24.680 --> 0:36:31.960 actually won't get okay? Shoot? But like but because really, 0:36:32.040 --> 0:36:34.400 like what do they say to you? You know, like 0:36:34.960 --> 0:36:37.320 at the time, growing up, it just it was taboo 0:36:37.400 --> 0:36:40.760 for a boy to dance. There was no boy dancers. 0:36:40.840 --> 0:36:43.640 Dancing with the stars wasn't even really a thing until 0:36:44.440 --> 0:36:46.560 you know, two thousand five when it started. So like 0:36:47.200 --> 0:36:50.720 growing up, when I was Tann eleven years old, dancing 0:36:51.400 --> 0:36:54.600 wasn't famous, It wasn't it wasn't fun. It wasn't cool. 0:36:54.640 --> 0:36:56.480 No one did it, and I got made fun of 0:36:56.560 --> 0:37:01.120 a lot um In hindsight, you know, actually, at the time, 0:37:01.200 --> 0:37:04.880 even I didn't care because obviously I love dancing so 0:37:05.040 --> 0:37:08.400 much that like it was my safe place after school. 0:37:08.440 --> 0:37:10.719 I would go straight to dance and just have fun 0:37:10.840 --> 0:37:14.000 and enjoy and like live my best life. That during 0:37:14.040 --> 0:37:17.120 the day, high school and and even junior high did 0:37:17.239 --> 0:37:19.799 not matter to me. And so now I look back 0:37:19.840 --> 0:37:22.799 at it, I'm like, yeah, it was a tough childhood. 0:37:23.320 --> 0:37:25.239 Everyone made fun of me, but I don't care, like 0:37:25.320 --> 0:37:28.680 it made me who I am, and I really, you know, 0:37:28.840 --> 0:37:31.120 I can. I can move past that and just be 0:37:31.200 --> 0:37:35.359 thankful that I still have dance. And now look at 0:37:35.400 --> 0:37:42.719 you that you read he's gotten the big trophy I 0:37:42.800 --> 0:37:47.319 got Jesse. Now that's what is your favorite thing about 0:37:47.400 --> 0:37:49.640 Jesse as a person, and then your favorite thing about 0:37:49.719 --> 0:37:53.839 Jesse as a dancer. Okay, one of the funniest things 0:37:53.840 --> 0:37:57.720 about Jesse is when like she's being sarcastic and over excited, 0:37:57.760 --> 0:38:03.040 it's so funny, like it's just that that that, And 0:38:03.080 --> 0:38:05.640 then when we're having fun in rehearsals, it's real, you know, 0:38:05.719 --> 0:38:08.680 it's not just like, oh, we're gonna be excited to 0:38:08.760 --> 0:38:11.759 do the dance, like will. She makes the best references. 0:38:11.800 --> 0:38:15.279 I think you like love movies. She's a movie buff, 0:38:15.360 --> 0:38:20.960 and she makes really accurate references. Give us one, well 0:38:21.040 --> 0:38:24.319 today was the best one of ms congeniality. And he's 0:38:24.360 --> 0:38:27.200 telling me to walk more graceful and glide, and I 0:38:27.360 --> 0:38:29.840 was like, I'm glad here, like when she's trying to 0:38:32.000 --> 0:38:35.320 feel why walk like her and I'm blind and blind 0:38:35.960 --> 0:38:39.200 this is like, it's it's just I love references like that. 0:38:39.360 --> 0:38:41.799 I love movies, you know, so it's it's really fun. 0:38:42.080 --> 0:38:45.359 And she makes the perfect reference. And then what's one 0:38:45.440 --> 0:38:48.640 thing that you um like, you, what's one thing that 0:38:48.719 --> 0:38:52.960 you're like you wish that she would um? Oh, this 0:38:53.120 --> 0:38:55.800 is the potst, none of the potst. I just like, 0:38:56.000 --> 0:38:58.200 what's one thing where you're just like like, I wish 0:38:58.239 --> 0:39:00.759 she could, you know, do do this or listen to 0:39:00.800 --> 0:39:03.600 me on this? I got you ready. This is the 0:39:03.680 --> 0:39:06.400 best one. I wish she believed in herself more in 0:39:06.520 --> 0:39:09.880 dancing because she gets it and I can see her 0:39:10.080 --> 0:39:12.359 trying so hard and a lot of the time, I'm 0:39:12.360 --> 0:39:14.799 sure you're familiar with it is like as soon as 0:39:14.840 --> 0:39:18.040 you let go, it clicks that can you like believe 0:39:18.080 --> 0:39:20.800 in yourself and it just it happens, It clicks, and 0:39:20.960 --> 0:39:23.360 you're like, oh my god, that Why was I struggling 0:39:23.400 --> 0:39:25.040 so hard with that when all I had to do 0:39:25.200 --> 0:39:28.319 is less and so like to me is like if 0:39:28.400 --> 0:39:31.320 she can believe in herself as soon as I believe 0:39:31.360 --> 0:39:34.400 in her, then it's like, okay, we're easy. And honestly, 0:39:34.560 --> 0:39:37.200 it's it's not just her, it's more of me because 0:39:38.080 --> 0:39:40.839 I have to change. I've been learning, especially with Jesse, 0:39:41.200 --> 0:39:43.799 how to change the way I teach. I overheard her saying, 0:39:43.920 --> 0:39:48.280 but you know, like Jesse is somebody that really reacts 0:39:48.440 --> 0:39:51.520 really well to positive reinforcement. And I've been doing that 0:39:51.920 --> 0:39:54.560 and I've been really adjusting to it. And I feel 0:39:54.600 --> 0:39:57.480 like this last like the last half of last week 0:39:57.560 --> 0:40:00.280 and this week has just been so much more wife 0:40:00.480 --> 0:40:04.960 and like almost easy because in a good environment, because 0:40:05.000 --> 0:40:09.640 I'm already going to beat yourself myself. I'm already going 0:40:09.680 --> 0:40:11.680 to do that, Like you don't have to worry about that. 0:40:11.800 --> 0:40:14.200 I got that covered, So I'm already there. So if 0:40:14.320 --> 0:40:16.919 I'm part of myself and he's double it's like double 0:40:16.960 --> 0:40:18.800 heart on myself. I need to have him lift me 0:40:18.800 --> 0:40:21.320 because I'm already inside just going like you can't do this, 0:40:21.440 --> 0:40:22.840 you can't do this. I need him to be like 0:40:23.000 --> 0:40:27.600 you can do this, and me go okay, right, you know, 0:40:27.800 --> 0:40:30.000 I see her right away and I'm like, oh, she's 0:40:30.120 --> 0:40:33.800 really like understanding it and she's not allowing herself to 0:40:33.920 --> 0:40:36.160 do it yet. And then when she does, it's like 0:40:36.239 --> 0:40:39.440 we finished, Like that was that was fun. That was great, 0:40:39.880 --> 0:40:41.560 and so like that to me is like I want 0:40:41.560 --> 0:40:44.680 to be better at facilitating that. For just it's almost 0:40:44.719 --> 0:40:47.440 like you gotta let go believe and let god you know, 0:40:47.719 --> 0:40:58.000 just for sure. Who's who's y'all's biggest competition? Do you think? Oh? Everyone? Everyone? 0:40:58.120 --> 0:41:00.239 You could just name one? Who do you think? Because 0:41:00.280 --> 0:41:04.000 who's who thinks the one? Honestly, I seriously can't tell you. 0:41:04.000 --> 0:41:07.759 You could probably say one, Jane, I I feel like, 0:41:07.880 --> 0:41:10.239 going into it, you may think there's one or two. 0:41:10.320 --> 0:41:13.360 But when you're standing on that balcony and you're watching everyone, 0:41:14.400 --> 0:41:18.799 I mean you're like, oh that that person. Like every 0:41:18.920 --> 0:41:21.720 you can see everyone getting to the finals this season. 0:41:21.800 --> 0:41:23.680 I don't know if it's always like that on every 0:41:24.360 --> 0:41:27.160 season of this show, but you even said yourself, like 0:41:27.320 --> 0:41:29.880 everyone's really good, Like there's at least half of the 0:41:29.920 --> 0:41:32.440 people in this caste. You're like, oh my god, there's 0:41:32.560 --> 0:41:35.239 there's the beauty about the show is that it is 0:41:35.280 --> 0:41:38.800 about growing and learning. But there are amazing dancers already, 0:41:39.239 --> 0:41:41.360 you know, Like it's this is like one of the 0:41:41.440 --> 0:41:44.439 first seasons where you look at like more than half 0:41:44.480 --> 0:41:47.000 the casting like on any other season, this person is 0:41:47.000 --> 0:41:49.840 a winner actually a good way to put it. And 0:41:49.960 --> 0:41:52.680 so I don't know who's gonna win this season. I 0:41:52.760 --> 0:41:54.880 mean well, and not to be rude, but like Bobby 0:41:54.920 --> 0:41:56.840 Bones did win. So it's like sometimes it's not the 0:41:56.880 --> 0:41:58.920 best answer that wins, it's the best story and it's 0:41:58.960 --> 0:42:02.120 the best you know, authenticity and the I actually went 0:42:02.200 --> 0:42:04.640 back and rewatched some of his season and he was 0:42:04.960 --> 0:42:09.440 entertaining and he cared and he fun And I think 0:42:09.480 --> 0:42:12.080 that's what it is. It's not just who's the best dancer, 0:42:12.440 --> 0:42:14.960 but who's really who's doing this for a bit, is 0:42:14.960 --> 0:42:18.600 going to really let go and who's growing and really 0:42:19.400 --> 0:42:23.120 committing to the show. Um, any tips or any like 0:42:23.160 --> 0:42:26.440 a little tidbits you can give for for tomorrow because 0:42:26.680 --> 0:42:29.880 this is airing Sunday, So anything you can give us 0:42:30.000 --> 0:42:35.799 as a little tease yess is committing. I am all 0:42:36.600 --> 0:42:45.840 in from hit. I'm going to good Oh my gosh, 0:42:46.520 --> 0:42:48.839 I'm so excited. Well, you guys have to watch, Um 0:42:49.239 --> 0:42:52.200 Jesse and Alan vote for them on Disney Plus. Um 0:42:52.440 --> 0:42:55.600 you can watch it live there and you guys were rooting. 0:42:55.719 --> 0:42:59.840 We're voting, we're loving and um Jesse, let me know 0:43:00.040 --> 0:43:02.680 which Monday I can come out and see any any 0:43:02.760 --> 0:43:09.320 of them came this Monday, come tomorrow. Okay, let me 0:43:09.360 --> 0:43:11.880 say that I can call Mike and we'll text. We'll 0:43:11.920 --> 0:43:14.759 see which one. Okay, okay, Um, I love you guys 0:43:14.800 --> 0:43:21.279 so much, thanks for coming on by. Wait do you 0:43:21.320 --> 0:43:29.640 want to go to l A. Where's tomorrow? Tomorrow? My 0:43:29.760 --> 0:43:33.680 life doesn't work well now that Colvin's not getting a divorce. 0:43:33.800 --> 0:43:37.680 Like you know, Nick can watch the kids. We can 0:43:37.760 --> 0:43:41.160 do There's a thing. I actually saw you more when 0:43:41.280 --> 0:43:43.759 you were married. That's like, that's the thing. I'm like 0:43:44.160 --> 0:43:46.160 you Bee, like, oh, it's still gonna work for Jenna's 0:43:46.160 --> 0:43:47.600 agenda with her being singles like no, no, no, it 0:43:47.600 --> 0:43:49.839 actually works better when they were married, right, I got 0:43:49.920 --> 0:43:51.600 to see her more. I know that your text was 0:43:51.640 --> 0:43:53.160 like I can't it's not my kid for a weekend, 0:43:53.239 --> 0:43:56.080 I can't, And I was like, my kids are so 0:43:58.760 --> 0:44:02.520 your kids are, Um, well No, But seriously, I love Jessine. 0:44:02.560 --> 0:44:04.200 I love the way that she I'm gonna start, I'm 0:44:04.200 --> 0:44:07.560 gonna start praying for y'all, for the main people. No, seriously, 0:44:07.960 --> 0:44:10.840 because about the perspective. That's not going to change. So 0:44:11.000 --> 0:44:14.680 it's change our perspective. No, I know. Is I got 0:44:14.719 --> 0:44:17.000 a dozen rosists, That's all I care about. Is there 0:44:17.080 --> 0:44:19.360 anything you want to tell us? Nope? Is there a 0:44:19.440 --> 0:44:22.320 thousand things you want to tell us? Goodbye?