Speaker 1: So get this. This story is wild.
Speaker 2: This is check this out like maybe the crazy story
Speaker 2: I've heard recently about an NBA player, maybe the dumbest,
Speaker 2: most preposterous way that an NBA player has ever been suspended.
Speaker 1: This is the story.
Speaker 2: In a game against the thunder Miami Heat, we're down
Speaker 2: just nine, just down to nine players, Dwayne Deadmond, journeyman
Speaker 2: probably gets like twelve minutes a game, getting some obvious
Speaker 2: minutes when they're down to nine men, decided to take
Speaker 2: out his in the Miami Heat haven't been good season
Speaker 2: long frustration out against Eric Spostra by getting pissy on
Speaker 2: the sideline. Not sure what it was about, not sure
Speaker 2: if there was some sort of independent thing going on,
Speaker 2: but he decided he was going to throw a temper tantrum.
Speaker 2: Spolster and Deadman jawed back and forth for about ten
Speaker 2: seconds before being separated. Totally fine, nothing wrong with that.
Speaker 2: And then he gets booted from the game. And along
Speaker 2: the way as he's being ejected, this is tremendous, he
Speaker 2: grabs a ferragun, which retail for about four hundred and
Speaker 2: ninety nine dollars.
Speaker 3: Throws it across the court where it lands in the
Speaker 3: middle of gameplay at the top of the key.
Speaker 1: What I have never heard of that before? Have you
Speaker 1: heard that? Miami Heat players they do some wild shit
Speaker 1: when they're mad at one another.
Speaker 2: Remember when Eudonnas Haslim and Jimmy Butler and Eric Sposter
Speaker 2: were all gonna fight last year. They just get there's
Speaker 2: something about that Miami air Man is insane.
Speaker 1: So today.
Speaker 2: The league, after consulting with pat Riley, decided they were
Speaker 2: going to hand down a one game suspension to Dwayne Deadmond,
Speaker 2: which means, my man, Dwayne Deadman got suspended for throwing
Speaker 2: a massage gun onto the court. Something that Deshaun Watson
Speaker 2: should familiarize himself with a massage gun to do it himself. Spostra,
Speaker 2: who's sneaky, fiery, very h much more bombastic than people realize,
Speaker 2: He said this, that's the Miami Heat. We're all a
Speaker 2: bunch of gnarly personalities. What are you talking about? Just
Speaker 2: throwing shit like I bet a player if they scratched
Speaker 2: each other across the flies and that's gnarly Heat culture
Speaker 2: for you.
Speaker 1: What does that even mean? That's like when I went
Speaker 1: to watch.
Speaker 2: Arizona play and some girl took her maneuvering out of
Speaker 2: her own body and put it on my shoulder, be like,
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, that's wildcat culture. No, that's fucking out of pocket,
Speaker 2: that's not adult activity, gnarly heat culture. I'm just gonna
Speaker 2: throw Have you ever felt a thera gun? They're heavy
Speaker 2: as fuck. If that would have hit baby Lowry in
Speaker 2: the head as he's coming up, he could have been concussed,
Speaker 2: he could.
Speaker 1: Have been out there just absolutely rocked.
Speaker 2: Deadman's averaging six and four on ten minutes per game.
Speaker 1: I don't think he's gonna have more of that moving forward.
Speaker 1: I don't know. It's just what's next one their gun?
Speaker 1: I don't even know.
Speaker 2: I don't even This has gotta be one of the
Speaker 2: craziest stories I've ever heard, moving forward to something more jolly.
Speaker 2: James Wiseman one part Deer in Headlights, one part Santa.
Speaker 1: Cruz Warrior, number one.
Speaker 2: Pick number two pick in the Draft now adds to
Speaker 2: his resume.
Speaker 1: Sound Cloud rapper.
Speaker 2: Yes, it's true, our man, James Wiseman dropped his I
Speaker 2: think second song today. I believe he had a single
Speaker 2: on the radio, which, let's be honest, the only reason
Speaker 2: it was probably on the radio is because it was
Speaker 2: James Wiseman. The song, though, is called get this tested.
Speaker 1: Oh, James Wiseman. He shouldn't have done that. You should
Speaker 1: not have called that tested.
Speaker 2: I might not have even said a word if it
Speaker 2: was called learning or struggling or g leaguing, or you know,
Speaker 2: any of those. But I do want to play a
Speaker 2: little of this clip because it's fucking funny.
Speaker 1: I wanted to marinate in your brain.
Speaker 2: I want the chorus specifically, as you listen to it,
Speaker 2: imagine James Wiseman drafted to a dynasty with Steph Curry,
Speaker 2: the best point guard of our generation, with Klay Thompson
Speaker 2: one of the best shooters of our generation, Steve Kerr,
Speaker 2: NBA champion, one of the best coaches in the league.
Speaker 1: Listen to this chorus and see if.
Speaker 2: It somehow jives in your mind best.
Speaker 1: What is James Wiseman talking about.
Speaker 2: There's just too much to dissect because the lyrics in
Speaker 2: the bars and the verses are just they have their
Speaker 2: own stuff we need to talk about. One of the
Speaker 2: lyrics is talking about how his pockets are empty. James
Speaker 2: Wiseman has been paid since Memphis, Like James Wiseman got
Speaker 2: kicked out of college basketball for literally getting paid millions
Speaker 2: of dollars to play for Benny Hardaway, which is maybe
Speaker 2: it all went to his parents. Maybe it didn't, but
Speaker 2: I know this, James Wiseman has not had any empty pockets.
Speaker 2: James Wiseman's about to get a huge contract that he
Speaker 2: did not earn. My first question is really just like
Speaker 2: what what has James Wiseman been tested by? Like, are
Speaker 2: we talking algebra? Are we talking about like school? Are
Speaker 2: we talking about tested by the G League?
Speaker 1: What are you tested by? James Wiseman, Tested by complex
Speaker 1: pick and roll coverages. That's n you kurw washy to run.
Speaker 2: Tested by the fact that you're supposed to just set
Speaker 2: hard screens. Just set the fucking screen, James, Do not
Speaker 2: slip and roll and demand the ball. Just set the screen,
Speaker 2: roll to the basket, get rebounds, fucking dunk. Be a
Speaker 2: more athletic Cavon Looney, James Wiseman, This is not a test,
Speaker 2: This is your job. James Wiseman, are you kidding me?
Speaker 1: You've been seven feet tall for like seven years.
Speaker 2: Miss man has zero minutes and eight sixteen bars under
Speaker 2: his belt, which is pretty much amount of minutes that
Speaker 2: he can actually play in a game.
Speaker 1: Productively. I don't understand.
Speaker 2: He's literally like food for NAMA's Cada who can't get
Speaker 2: any minutes for the Sacramento Kings. I will rewrite this
Speaker 2: song with all the things that James Wiseman has been
Speaker 2: tested by. I will do't do not give me some
Speaker 2: free time because I have had things like I've been
Speaker 2: test it. Yeah, I've been tested. I've been on the
Speaker 2: bench so long. Yeah, I'm fully rested. Yeah how about that?
Speaker 2: How about that?
Speaker 1: Yeah?
Speaker 2: Yeah, we'll talk about his ligaments and how they don't
Speaker 2: really work. Come on now, man, you get the point.
Speaker 2: James Wiseman. I need to have him on the show.
Speaker 2: He's the perfect He wouldn't like it. You would not
Speaker 2: like it. James Wiseman, I love you. I really root
Speaker 2: for you. I'm hoping for the best. But you gotta
Speaker 2: get the shit together, because you can't be writing lyrics
Speaker 2: and putting out SoundCloud songs when you can't get any
Speaker 2: minutes playing for a fucking team that drafted you number
Speaker 2: two overall when they barely have any first round picks,
Speaker 2: and oh my god, are they regretting it? To the
Speaker 2: point where Joe Lacub, the owner, is saying he didn't
Speaker 2: even make that decision that somebody else, like some random
Speaker 2: staffer made it for him. People are backing away from you,
Speaker 2: James Wiseman, do not make any songs.
Speaker 1: Do not make any songs.
Speaker 2: My question is also, will James Wiseman ever become a
Speaker 2: pretty to the NBA player? I don't know that's say, shake, shake,
Speaker 2: shake the magic eight ball, magic eight ball says. My
Speaker 2: sources say no. Will Wiseman become a part of a
Speaker 2: major trade, Yes, My sources say yes, because James Wiseman
Speaker 2: will get paid so much money, and we know Joe
Speaker 2: Lacamb's not going to the luxury tax for a guy
Speaker 2: who's talking about I think he's probably said tested in
Speaker 2: there what fifty times that oh, don't even and the
Speaker 2: first person not even him. It's the third verse that
Speaker 2: sounds very much like what you imagine James Wiseman to
Speaker 2: sound like, which is a lumbering oath. That's all the
Speaker 2: time that we after the heat check, before I get canceled.
Speaker 2: We'll be back one day with an all new episode.
Speaker 1: Comes out on Tuesday.
Speaker 2: Check out the feed for past episodes and many episodes.
Speaker 1: Do not forget to download, subscribe.
Speaker 2: Please tell your friends I just hit a car, so
Speaker 2: I need some money for my deductible.
Speaker 1: If you give me a follow.
Speaker 2: Send me some money to my VENMO that would be
Speaker 2: fucking phenomenal, and follow us on social at this heat
Speaker 2: checking at Tristan Criek on TikTok