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Speaker 1: A disabled person keeps parking where I don't want them to,

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Speaker 1: So I got them toad, Am I the a hole?

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Speaker 2: Really, if you think about it, OP is enabling the

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Speaker 2: disabled person by making them move.

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Speaker 1: It's like the US workout programs like get up and

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Speaker 1: at him.

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Speaker 2: Yeah yeah, I think OP is doing this person a favor.

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Speaker 2: It's like, Oh, you can't move, let me help you

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Speaker 2: move right? Oh okay, let me push you across the

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Speaker 2: street exactly, let.

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Speaker 3: Me push you into oncoming traffic.

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Speaker 4: Wow.

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Speaker 1: What what a kind heart? Ople My goodness. So I

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Speaker 1: bought a house a few months ago and I moved

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Speaker 1: in last month.

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Speaker 3: Congrats, congrats Op.

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Speaker 1: The previous owner was a friendly old man that could

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Speaker 1: no longer live alone, so he decided to sell and

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Speaker 1: move in with his daughter. Just to be clear, I

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Speaker 1: put disabled in quotation marks because I.

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Speaker 3: Don't believe in this disability. I don't. Your legs don't work?

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Speaker 2: Come on it, like, come on to do the old

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Speaker 2: branding technique where you take a hot iron and put.

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Speaker 3: It on their leg. Flinch, then you you know they're

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Speaker 3: not legit.

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Speaker 1: Wow, that's the classic move.

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Speaker 2: You know you gotta test, you gotta test. That's how

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Speaker 2: you test people's legs work or not.

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Speaker 1: Of course, that's that's that's what that's definitely what people do.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, it's like, oh, you're finding your disability. Let's try

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Speaker 2: the branding technique.

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Speaker 1: Shout out the government. I put this in quotation marks

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Speaker 1: because the lady in question is just really really overweight,

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Speaker 1: and I'm not sure if that counts as disabled.

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Speaker 2: However, we are we talking pick up a buck, look

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Speaker 2: it up. I think it still counts disabled. If you

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Speaker 2: can't if you're so fat you can't move, you're still disabled.

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Speaker 1: I think that's what it is. Yeah, like legally, legally.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, just because you caused your own disability doesn't mean

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Speaker 2: that you aren't disabled. Yes, Like if I shoot both

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Speaker 2: of my kneecaps and can't walk, I'm still disabled, even

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Speaker 2: though I shop both my kneecaps.

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Speaker 1: Great move, yeah, great move, great move those checks. Now

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Speaker 1: you don't have to deal with your stupid knees.

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Speaker 2: You know, knees suck. Let's listen, like we could just

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Speaker 2: get how many people knee problems?

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Speaker 3: Right? Like, oh, I can't run well, like my knees hard.

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Speaker 3: Just shoot them, get rid of them.

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Speaker 1: Samuel Donner Solutions won't tell you about this one. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: they tried to keep it a secret, but we were

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Speaker 1: being yeah, we're gonna expose the truth. This is truth

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Speaker 1: the social Salm and John. The best is doctors don't

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Speaker 1: want to reveal this one trick. In Santa Monica, California,

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Speaker 1: we lived, oh of course. Yeah, yeah, that placed three

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Speaker 1: hundred miles away from where.

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Speaker 3: We are, Santa Monica. Barely there's gonna be.

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Speaker 1: There's gonna be like one hundred just random okop fans

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Speaker 1: wandering the streets of Sanaa to Salm and John.

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Speaker 2: Where are they Santa Monica. We're talking about the next

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Speaker 2: in line for the Santa Claus job. Oh yeah, Santa Claus,

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Speaker 2: San Diego, Santa Monica, or or Santa Monica, Nebraska, you know,

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Speaker 2: the famous famous you know.

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Speaker 1: Population of four thy five hundred. We're there, so look

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Speaker 1: for us there, the most popular. We are the talk

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Speaker 1: of the town.

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Speaker 2: That we are only people talking, that everyone is vocally

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Speaker 2: disabled there exactly. We ripped out their book so we

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Speaker 2: would be the only podcast. Oh man, okay, where are

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Speaker 2: we in this story? Yeah, no one will podcast about us.

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Speaker 2: We are the Amazon podcast and destroying ever podcast in

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Speaker 2: our weake. Jeff Bezos, every other podcast, will have to

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Speaker 2: pee in a bottle in order to record, because we've

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Speaker 2: bought all of the podcasts studio, and did you record

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Speaker 2: ten episodes? We're not letting you out of your room episodes.

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Speaker 2: Here's a bottle.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, but sir, I need water. Once you pee in

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Speaker 3: the bottle, drink that. That's right.

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Speaker 1: You must record at all times. Not a second wasted

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Speaker 1: and not a dropping it a piss either. Nope. Now,

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Speaker 1: apparently he had been allowing use of his driveway to

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Speaker 1: his disabled neighbor lady, largely because street parking is extremely limited,

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Speaker 1: and what little street parking there is is pretty much

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Speaker 1: instantly occupied. Sounds like they live in Santa Monica, Nebraska.

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Speaker 1: Yeah around classic dude sen amount of rasca. You're lucky

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Speaker 1: if you find a spot. Oh yeah, yeah, I charge

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Speaker 1: you out the wazoo.

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Speaker 3: The wazoo is charged. Yep.

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Speaker 1: What I'm saying is, unless you have a driveway, you

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Speaker 1: end up parking a good five minute walk away. And

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Speaker 1: that's a best case scenario. And a five minute walk

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Speaker 1: for an obese disabled person is more like a ten

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Speaker 1: minute roll. I mean, I'm just gonna let that one

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Speaker 1: sit where it is. Obviously, I was unaware obviously, I

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Speaker 1: was unaware of this, so I was surprised to see

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Speaker 1: a large suv large parks in my driveway. When I

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Speaker 1: moved it, it's like flatbed truck, plenty of space in

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Speaker 1: the here coming in.

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Speaker 3: We got extra wide loads, extra wild lady.

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Speaker 2: Oh god, we're yeah, we're gonna get oh man.

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Speaker 1: So I ended up having to knock on several doors

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Speaker 1: asking whose car it was because they were removers who

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Speaker 1: could not stand still on the busy road for long. Yeah.

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Speaker 1: So literally like he's just got like giant trucks of

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Speaker 1: his stuff. Like, hey, move, get out of the way,

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Speaker 1: Like that's the giant giant trucks. Where moving. He's literally

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Speaker 1: moving in, but someone has parked in his spow.

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Speaker 3: So he's trying to move in this this lady, random.

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Speaker 1: Random large suv. I figured it was the neighbor's car,

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Speaker 1: so after ten minutes of knocking, an extremely angry, enormous

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Speaker 1: lady opened the door. Quote that those are that's an

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Speaker 1: exact quote.

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Speaker 3: Guys. Okay, I say gotta be Claire.

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Speaker 1: Go on, it's a right a story. I told her

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Speaker 1: to move the car, and she immediately started arguing that

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Speaker 1: the neighbor said it was fine. I told her he's

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Speaker 1: moved out. He's not your neighbor. No more, you're on

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Speaker 1: the ally. It's got I moved in and no it's

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Speaker 1: not fine. And to move it because the movers need

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Speaker 1: to unload my stuff. She begrudgingly did. I ended up

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Speaker 1: seeing her walk back half an hour later, completely wet

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Speaker 1: with sweat.

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Speaker 2: Not low key low key though he might be helping

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Speaker 2: her avoid a heart attack with this one. You know,

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Speaker 2: maybe maybe this is the fitness program she needed to

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Speaker 2: turn it around. The old car walk, Yeah, the car Hey, hey,

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Speaker 2: you gotta you gotta walk.

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Speaker 3: Can't just not walk? It's not healthy.

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Speaker 1: Well, if I have bionic knees, I can.

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Speaker 3: That's true. Whatever I play, it's true.

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Speaker 5: Yeah.

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Speaker 2: I mean I guess like something sort of exer Like

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Speaker 2: if you don't have any legs, then I guess you

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Speaker 2: don't have to walk, but some sort of exercise. Yes,

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Speaker 2: is good. We're we're pro exercise. Not I'm having legs.

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Speaker 2: I don't have anti exercise, anti and anti legs. What

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Speaker 2: can we do? What can we do to just stop all?

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Speaker 2: I want the future right now.

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Speaker 1: I was literally about to say that we will become

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Speaker 1: a morphous blobs.

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Speaker 3: That is my.

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Speaker 1: Stand John for president.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, every man, woman, and child will be given a

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Speaker 2: morphous blob to be consumed by.

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Speaker 1: You will get a moving chair where you'll not lead

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Speaker 1: to lift a finger, foot, or toe.

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Speaker 3: Ever. Again, all you have to do is press the

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Speaker 3: button to vote for me.

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Speaker 2: Again.

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Speaker 3: That's the only movie you'll have to have her make.

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Speaker 2: Now.

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Speaker 1: A few days later, I went back to work and

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Speaker 1: lo and behold, suv is parked in my driveway again.

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Speaker 3: Dude, she's addicted to the workout.

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Speaker 2: Now. It's just like it's like Berry's bootcam, but for

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Speaker 2: obese people.

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Speaker 1: Well, now she's not parking there, so she's not getting

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Speaker 1: the exercise.

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Speaker 3: Well no, I thought she is parking there.

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Speaker 1: She parked in the driveway to drive.

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Speaker 2: But yeah, so she's going to get the exercise because

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Speaker 2: she's have to move it again.

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Speaker 1: Exercise to go back out and movement. Yeah, it's double

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Speaker 1: the exercise. That's an interesting workout plan. I go over

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Speaker 1: there again, spend twenty minutes knocking on the door before

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Speaker 1: this lady opens the door again visibly angry. I tell

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Speaker 1: her to move her card if.

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Speaker 2: It's taking twenty minutes, because it takes her twenty minutes

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Speaker 2: across her house. Oh, it's so canceled.

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Speaker 1: You're on your own on this one, buddy, John, Yeah yeah, John. Automatically,

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Speaker 1: John clicked this box to automatically opt into all of

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Speaker 1: Sam's y's and opinions.

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Speaker 3: He's signing the waiver right now. That's right.

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Speaker 1: Part of our Amazon podcast Empire is getting all the

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Speaker 1: unequivocally all rights of all participants. I tell her to

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Speaker 1: move her car. My driveway is not public parking. She protests,

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Speaker 1: saying her ankles can't take walking the distance, and claims

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Speaker 1: that I can easily walk. I tell her that, while

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Speaker 1: that might be true, it's my got dang driveway and

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Speaker 1: I want to park there myself.

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Speaker 3: Damn straight Yo.

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Speaker 1: Again, she moves her car again. I spot her half

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Speaker 1: an hour later, drenched in sweat, making her way home. Well,

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Speaker 1: it happened again a week or so ago, oh man,

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Speaker 1: and this time she would not open her door. I

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Speaker 1: got tired of it and had her SUV toad. That

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Speaker 1: is a very long walk. It is escalating. She of

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Speaker 1: course came to my house to scream at me. I

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Speaker 1: told her to get the hell off my property. A

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Speaker 1: few days later, I had a small fence installed with

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Speaker 1: a lock on it to make sure she didn't do

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Speaker 1: it again, So I guess on the parking.

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Speaker 2: Spot low key smart. I feel like Opie's just making

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Speaker 2: smart moves. He's playing chess over here, definitely forty chess

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Speaker 2: over Yeah, sixty chess. Oh god, all the d's, all

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Speaker 2: the d's nuts chess. I have since been beating these

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Speaker 2: nuts on your chest. They had to cook for a second,

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Speaker 2: but it came out strong.

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Speaker 3: I did.

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Speaker 1: I have since been getting dirty looks from her and

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Speaker 1: one other neighbor. When I told my mom, she told

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Speaker 1: me that I should be nicer to people. I do

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Speaker 1: sort of feel bad. She clearly struggles with the walk

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Speaker 1: after all. So the question is to the okay, op

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Speaker 1: gang was op the a hole? Now? I want to

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Speaker 1: know what you all think? This is, uh, one of

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Speaker 1: the trickier ones, one of the trickier, stickier ones. But

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Speaker 1: sweat stick sweaty sticky swam Sam, wipe, wipe those beads

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Speaker 1: off your forehead and tell us what do you think?

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Speaker 3: Okay?

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Speaker 2: Well, I think I think if he noticed that she's

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Speaker 2: parking there a lot and he doesn't use it, just

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Speaker 2: like say like, hey, for a monthly fee, you could

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Speaker 2: park there, you know, it sounds like she really needs

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Speaker 2: to park. Interesting, So I say to put that capitalist

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Speaker 2: monopoly Manhattan, Yeah, and make some money off this this

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Speaker 2: lady there we go at the very least. Or I mean,

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Speaker 2: guess you could be like a nice neighbor. There's letter

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Speaker 2: park there if you don't need.

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Speaker 3: Too of it. That's gross.

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Speaker 1: Wow, why'd be nice when you can? But you can

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Speaker 1: be jump bez.

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Speaker 3: Of parking spaces on your neighbor streets. Monopoly.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, now he's gonna sell all the parking spaces up

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Speaker 2: and down the block.

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Speaker 1: You know, that's an interesting idea because we read a

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Speaker 1: story just a few weeks back where somebody it was

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Speaker 1: an airplane seat and the person was too large and

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Speaker 1: and he spilled over, and so OPI's offer was like, hey, like,

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Speaker 1: I'll take one hundred and fifty, which is like.

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Speaker 3: What it would be or whatever I think she might.

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Speaker 3: I think she would pay it, dude.

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Speaker 1: It's it's an interesting idea. I think it's a good

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Speaker 1: I think it's definitely a good thing to offer.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, at the end of the day, yes, like a

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Speaker 2: little bit of a dick move, but it is also

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Speaker 2: his spot, so he can whatever he wants with that.

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Speaker 2: She's in the wrong for parking in his his spot.

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Speaker 2: It sounds like he needs it too. But what we

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Speaker 2: want you to do is baffle and blow our minds

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Speaker 2: with your comments. So put your thoughts in the comments

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Speaker 2: below and publicly subscribe and we might just read it.

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Speaker 3: Love you.

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Speaker 4: I went to beat my meat, but then I found

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Speaker 4: my girlfriend on the hub beaten somebody else's meat.

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Speaker 2: Apparently, they say, like money is like one of like

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Speaker 2: the dirtiest objects, Like dirty money is like real.

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Speaker 1: It's like it literally has to be. Yeah, I mean,

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Speaker 1: how do you watch thing goes everywhere? Yeah, and no

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Speaker 1: no one washes it.

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Speaker 2: Think of all the stripper buttholes just mad cracks, mad cracks,

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Speaker 2: mad cracks.

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Speaker 1: Speaking of cracks and other genitalia.

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Speaker 2: Yeah yeah that song show me your janitals, your janitals?

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Speaker 3: What show me your Yeah?

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Speaker 1: What is that?

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Speaker 4: I went to beat my meat, but then I found

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00:12:54,520 --> 00:12:57,720
Speaker 4: my girlfriend on the hub beaten somebody else's meat.

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Speaker 2: No, you don't want your girlfriend and the cook meats

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Speaker 2: with someone else.

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00:13:03,000 --> 00:13:05,080
Speaker 1: That's a sausage for one. Sweet.

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Speaker 2: Have you seen the I just I love my smoked meats,

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00:13:10,360 --> 00:13:11,880
Speaker 2: you know, like the Mark Zuckerberg thing.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, put that in I smoked meats. I love

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Speaker 1: smoked meats. I am a human. I am a human consume.

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00:13:20,760 --> 00:13:27,120
Speaker 1: I do consume food, not data. Uh, this actually did

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Speaker 1: happen today, and I'm still kind of shaken up from

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Speaker 1: my initial reaction. Basically, me and my girlfriend of almost

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Speaker 1: three years are now in a long distance relationship due

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Speaker 1: to us both being in college, which that sucks. But yeah,

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Speaker 1: like college at least hopefully like after they get out,

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Speaker 1: like almost a senior year, like hopefully they can get together.

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Speaker 3: Wow. You know, man, it sounds it.

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Speaker 1: Sounds like they have such a great relationship based off

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Speaker 1: the title. I mean, just like really really solid.

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Speaker 2: Dude, Like you know, you go with your freshman year,

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Speaker 2: You're you're hanging out your dorm. You're meeting some.

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Speaker 1: Cuties and uh slanging some sausages, laying some sausages.

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Speaker 3: Gea yea.

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Speaker 1: Some days you want honey barbecue, other days you want

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00:14:13,120 --> 00:14:19,040
Speaker 1: you know, honey mustard, horse radish. Yeah, that's a unique choice.

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Speaker 1: We're both from the same hometown, so during the summer

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Speaker 1: we get to see each other freely because we both

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Speaker 1: come home to work.

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Speaker 3: Cool.

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Speaker 1: Now, long distance is hard as.

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00:14:30,520 --> 00:14:33,760
Speaker 2: Yes, it is. I have done long distance, Yeah, multiple times.

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00:14:33,840 --> 00:14:37,480
Speaker 1: It is not fun. It sucks, So summer is a

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00:14:37,480 --> 00:14:41,200
Speaker 1: great time for us to f like Catholics.

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00:14:42,400 --> 00:14:43,920
Speaker 3: Are Catholics? Do Catholics?

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Speaker 5: I know?

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00:14:44,920 --> 00:14:47,280
Speaker 1: I know they. I know they take it into booty

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00:14:47,320 --> 00:14:53,760
Speaker 1: hole because it's like not because it's illegal, but if

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00:14:53,800 --> 00:14:56,720
Speaker 1: you just take it just straight in the dumper, then

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00:14:57,040 --> 00:15:00,560
Speaker 1: that apparently is Jesus doesn't look, which is like, which

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00:15:00,560 --> 00:15:02,520
Speaker 1: is just it's just hilarious.

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Speaker 3: Like is that actually does that?

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Speaker 5: I don't.

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Speaker 1: I don't know if that's like, actually, that's just what

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00:15:06,720 --> 00:15:07,600
Speaker 1: people say say.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, there's another song where it's like, uh, fuck me

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Speaker 2: and the ass because I love Jesus the Good Lord

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00:15:15,600 --> 00:15:20,920
Speaker 2: would want it that way. Sweet Sensation of anal penetration?

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Speaker 3: Is that?

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00:15:22,400 --> 00:15:23,920
Speaker 1: Is that Bo Burnham? Or is that someone?

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00:15:24,080 --> 00:15:24,280
Speaker 3: I know?

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00:15:24,480 --> 00:15:28,200
Speaker 2: It's it's like this, this group of ladies I see

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00:15:28,240 --> 00:15:31,360
Speaker 2: see you know I have all the meme songs. You do?

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Speaker 1: You have the meme song? Yeah, you really do. Actually

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00:15:33,280 --> 00:15:34,880
Speaker 1: I never put that together. You have all the meme

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00:15:34,920 --> 00:15:36,800
Speaker 1: songs on deck, so we gotta have Oh it is

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00:15:36,920 --> 00:15:39,560
Speaker 1: six fun time to make up for the time that

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00:15:39,600 --> 00:15:43,440
Speaker 1: we spend a part of course. Fortunately she's on the

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Speaker 1: pill so we don't have to use any protection. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: and that's great, right? Wrong? How to take the glasses

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Speaker 1: off of that?

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Speaker 3: One?

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Speaker 1: Last night we ended up hanging out and we were

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00:15:58,400 --> 00:16:02,760
Speaker 1: about to get busy, but she ended up getting a headache,

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00:16:02,760 --> 00:16:08,440
Speaker 1: and as a result, classic it happens, it happens, and

320
00:16:08,520 --> 00:16:11,320
Speaker 1: as a result, she wasn't in the mood. So I

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00:16:11,400 --> 00:16:16,440
Speaker 1: went home with some blue blue balls and decided that

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00:16:16,600 --> 00:16:19,640
Speaker 1: I was tired too and just went to sleep it off.

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00:16:19,680 --> 00:16:22,640
Speaker 1: After going in and out of sleep, I eventually decided

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00:16:23,200 --> 00:16:27,360
Speaker 1: I wanted to get off and all reliable would have

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00:16:27,560 --> 00:16:30,840
Speaker 1: to do on this one fellas it comes in hand.

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00:16:31,320 --> 00:16:39,080
Speaker 1: I'm but getting handed tonight, ladies and gentlemen, And no

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00:16:39,200 --> 00:16:44,120
Speaker 1: I'm not talking fixing plumbing or maybe I am fixing

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00:16:44,200 --> 00:16:49,480
Speaker 1: somebody's pipe tonight. No, hey, I gotta screw loose. You

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00:16:49,680 --> 00:16:55,040
Speaker 1: could screw back into place. So I did what anyone

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00:16:55,080 --> 00:16:58,680
Speaker 1: would do. I loaded up good Old, I loaded up

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00:16:58,840 --> 00:17:02,720
Speaker 1: the Hub and started browsing through the videos until I

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00:17:02,840 --> 00:17:06,280
Speaker 1: found one of those casting tapes that looked good enough

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00:17:06,320 --> 00:17:08,399
Speaker 1: for my desires.

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00:17:08,920 --> 00:17:10,800
Speaker 3: Feel that desire pee ooh.

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00:17:11,720 --> 00:17:14,760
Speaker 1: I got the lotion ready and just lathered up my

336
00:17:14,960 --> 00:17:18,800
Speaker 1: meat skepter. And that is actually what they wrote. I

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00:17:18,840 --> 00:17:21,800
Speaker 1: did not even change it for that one. But then

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00:17:23,240 --> 00:17:27,399
Speaker 1: I stopped, oh to do a double take. The girl

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00:17:27,400 --> 00:17:31,600
Speaker 1: in the video kind of looked like my girlfriend. Oh no,

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00:17:31,880 --> 00:17:34,960
Speaker 1: actually exactly like my girlfriend.

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00:17:35,080 --> 00:17:35,560
Speaker 3: Oh no.

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00:17:36,040 --> 00:17:39,080
Speaker 1: I was just thinking, oh cool, this is just like

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Speaker 1: me banging one out to some some newdies. And then

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Speaker 1: I got back to Jack and my sausage.

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Speaker 5: But but once this, but once this, but once the

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00:17:53,920 --> 00:17:58,040
Speaker 5: cheeks started clapping, my heart stops bapping.

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00:17:59,840 --> 00:18:05,560
Speaker 1: My heart stopped. And because she had the exact same

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00:18:05,920 --> 00:18:12,040
Speaker 1: birthmark that my girlfriend did. Oh no, a spot, recognizable, recognizable.

349
00:18:12,640 --> 00:18:16,520
Speaker 1: I spotted it right below her booty, same shape and everything.

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00:18:17,760 --> 00:18:22,000
Speaker 1: This was not a lookalike. This was my girlfriend. Yep,

351
00:18:22,520 --> 00:18:25,119
Speaker 1: this is where we're at. I grabbed my earbuds to

352
00:18:25,160 --> 00:18:28,960
Speaker 1: plug in, and sure enough, it was her voice speaking

353
00:18:29,040 --> 00:18:32,680
Speaker 1: to the camera, explaining how she was doing this because

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00:18:32,680 --> 00:18:37,280
Speaker 1: she needed some money for college and she's in college.

355
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Speaker 3: Well, I mean that's when you need money.

356
00:18:41,119 --> 00:18:42,240
Speaker 1: It's like it all lies.

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00:18:42,400 --> 00:18:45,639
Speaker 3: Oh, like it's happening right now, yes, yes, right.

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00:18:46,320 --> 00:18:50,240
Speaker 1: So I checked below the video title and it linked

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00:18:50,280 --> 00:18:54,160
Speaker 1: to the actors, and it linked to the actress actress's name,

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00:18:54,880 --> 00:18:58,720
Speaker 1: and I saw her screen name. I was hesitant, but

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Speaker 1: I clicked on it. Oh, now I clicked out. Turns

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00:19:04,280 --> 00:19:08,000
Speaker 1: out this wasn't a one time quick cash deal because

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Speaker 1: on my screen I was looking at page after page

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Speaker 1: after page of all of these videos of my girlfriend

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00:19:16,600 --> 00:19:20,360
Speaker 1: being railed by giant monster ding dongs.

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00:19:20,720 --> 00:19:24,200
Speaker 2: Oh no, I feel bad for ope, Yeah, that's rough.

367
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Speaker 1: You don't want to know that my girlfriend was not

368
00:19:27,720 --> 00:19:33,760
Speaker 1: as innocent as I thought she was a starlet. I

369
00:19:33,880 --> 00:19:36,760
Speaker 1: was so effing torn in that moment. So many feelings

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00:19:36,760 --> 00:19:39,639
Speaker 1: just started running through my brain. It now made sense

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Speaker 1: why she suddenly decided to go on the pill last

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Speaker 1: year without really having a reason. She was always complaining

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Speaker 1: about money, so this makes sense that she would do

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Speaker 1: it for this reason too.

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Speaker 3: Oh my god.

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Speaker 1: I then started freaking out about catching something. None of

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00:19:54,720 --> 00:19:58,199
Speaker 1: these videos had the guys using protection, and several times

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00:19:58,240 --> 00:20:02,000
Speaker 1: there was a cream po oh, no, fresh out the

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00:20:02,080 --> 00:20:10,960
Speaker 1: up ding your pies ready, honey, yeah it is. We

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00:20:10,960 --> 00:20:15,320
Speaker 1: were both each other's first so once, so once she

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00:20:15,440 --> 00:20:18,680
Speaker 1: was on the pill, we ditched using protection altogether because

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00:20:18,720 --> 00:20:21,320
Speaker 1: we knew neither of us had anything. But now I

383
00:20:21,480 --> 00:20:23,240
Speaker 1: was terrified that I had been duped.

384
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Speaker 3: Dude, I mean I would be.

385
00:20:24,960 --> 00:20:28,520
Speaker 2: It's like because it's like one thing that that person like,

386
00:20:28,520 --> 00:20:30,960
Speaker 2: like that person sleeping with another person, but the person

387
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Speaker 2: that she's sleeping with is also sleeping with another person,

388
00:20:33,880 --> 00:20:37,320
Speaker 2: and so you have like a uh like it's like

389
00:20:37,440 --> 00:20:40,320
Speaker 2: it's like squared, you know, it's not a compound.

390
00:20:40,560 --> 00:20:43,880
Speaker 1: Compounds, dude, that's that's compound interest. I do not want

391
00:20:43,920 --> 00:20:49,480
Speaker 1: to now, not to mention. We had been plowing like

392
00:20:49,600 --> 00:20:52,920
Speaker 1: crazy over the last few months, so my worries were

393
00:20:52,960 --> 00:20:56,720
Speaker 1: heightened because this was very very recent. Yeah, I realized

394
00:20:56,720 --> 00:20:59,480
Speaker 1: that it was late enough that I couldn't do anything,

395
00:20:59,760 --> 00:21:03,000
Speaker 1: so oh I just went to bed. I woke up

396
00:21:03,000 --> 00:21:07,400
Speaker 1: the next morning in cold sweats. I was angry, pissed,

397
00:21:07,760 --> 00:21:10,920
Speaker 1: in an emotional wreck. I sent a text to my girlfriend,

398
00:21:11,320 --> 00:21:15,159
Speaker 1: calling her a salute and a liar and everything in

399
00:21:15,200 --> 00:21:18,400
Speaker 1: the book I could think of, oh ye flying off

400
00:21:18,400 --> 00:21:21,199
Speaker 1: the handle over here. I called up my doctor's office

401
00:21:21,240 --> 00:21:24,879
Speaker 1: and scheduled to get tested. Fortunately, they could take me

402
00:21:24,920 --> 00:21:27,920
Speaker 1: in right then, so I drove over. After the tests

403
00:21:27,960 --> 00:21:30,720
Speaker 1: were finished, I got a text from my girlfriend, what

404
00:21:30,760 --> 00:21:34,639
Speaker 1: the f are you even talking about? I was even

405
00:21:34,760 --> 00:21:38,400
Speaker 1: angrier than before. This dumb little bish was gonna ask

406
00:21:38,560 --> 00:21:39,239
Speaker 1: dumb about it?

407
00:21:39,760 --> 00:21:39,960
Speaker 3: No.

408
00:21:40,560 --> 00:21:43,920
Speaker 1: I was furious, but I had evidence she was not

409
00:21:43,960 --> 00:21:47,440
Speaker 1: going to get out of this without some explaining. So

410
00:21:47,960 --> 00:21:50,679
Speaker 1: I fired up the good old hub once again to

411
00:21:50,760 --> 00:21:56,600
Speaker 1: find the videos, and then I couldn't find the casting

412
00:21:56,600 --> 00:21:58,159
Speaker 1: one that found last night.

413
00:21:58,240 --> 00:22:01,800
Speaker 3: Did she did de lead all of them? Did she?

414
00:22:03,280 --> 00:22:06,480
Speaker 1: No worries? I remembered her stage name from all the

415
00:22:06,560 --> 00:22:10,000
Speaker 1: videos I had seen, So I went and I went

416
00:22:10,040 --> 00:22:12,560
Speaker 1: and typed it into the search bar, but again was

417
00:22:12,600 --> 00:22:15,240
Speaker 1: surprised by what I found, not because I was looking

418
00:22:15,280 --> 00:22:18,560
Speaker 1: at her being railed by other dudes again, but because

419
00:22:18,560 --> 00:22:24,200
Speaker 1: the videos were not there. They didn't exist. What now?

420
00:22:24,240 --> 00:22:27,320
Speaker 1: I was just fing confused? Yeah, us too, buddy.

421
00:22:27,480 --> 00:22:29,679
Speaker 3: Wait, so like maybe check the search history or something.

422
00:22:29,960 --> 00:22:32,720
Speaker 1: I don't Yeah, Like, are re exhausting all that? If

423
00:22:32,600 --> 00:22:34,440
Speaker 1: if you found it last night? How could it all

424
00:22:34,480 --> 00:22:38,040
Speaker 1: just magically disappear? Like this doesn't make any sense. I

425
00:22:38,080 --> 00:22:40,720
Speaker 1: tried looking at other websites but came up with the

426
00:22:40,760 --> 00:22:44,680
Speaker 1: same results. Nothing. I knew I saw them last night, though,

427
00:22:44,840 --> 00:22:48,320
Speaker 1: so they were there, right, And that's when the realization hit.

428
00:22:48,680 --> 00:22:50,600
Speaker 1: Remember how I said I was drifting in and out

429
00:22:50,600 --> 00:22:54,320
Speaker 1: of sleep before getting up to jerk my sausage. It

430
00:22:54,359 --> 00:22:58,200
Speaker 1: was all a dream, A very bad dream.

431
00:22:58,359 --> 00:23:00,760
Speaker 3: Man had dreams about has to be.

432
00:23:01,040 --> 00:23:05,440
Speaker 1: And acted whacking off of all of the stuff.

433
00:23:05,480 --> 00:23:08,520
Speaker 2: See that that shows that maybe you gotta you gotta

434
00:23:08,600 --> 00:23:11,359
Speaker 2: cut the cut the whacken, because if you're having dreams

435
00:23:11,359 --> 00:23:14,320
Speaker 2: about whacken, yeah, nuh, you.

436
00:23:14,320 --> 00:23:16,720
Speaker 1: Might need to might need to switch it on up my.

437
00:23:16,720 --> 00:23:17,880
Speaker 3: Gag, curb it a little bit.

438
00:23:18,240 --> 00:23:20,680
Speaker 1: My brain decided that a great dream to have would

439
00:23:20,680 --> 00:23:25,639
Speaker 1: be my girlfriend being a star if you catch my drift,

440
00:23:26,119 --> 00:23:30,439
Speaker 1: and forcing me to watch her bang other dudes. So

441
00:23:30,520 --> 00:23:32,920
Speaker 1: here I am explaining you to my girlfriend like an

442
00:23:32,960 --> 00:23:36,920
Speaker 1: idiot about how I let a dream about her, about

443
00:23:37,000 --> 00:23:39,880
Speaker 1: I let a dream about her doing videos without my knowledge,

444
00:23:40,119 --> 00:23:43,080
Speaker 1: apologizing for all the names I call I called her,

445
00:23:43,240 --> 00:23:45,720
Speaker 1: and sitting in awe at about how badly this has

446
00:23:45,760 --> 00:23:49,480
Speaker 1: turned out. Fortunately, she seems to be mostly understanding of this,

447
00:23:49,560 --> 00:23:52,880
Speaker 1: So so I think we're in the good for now.

448
00:23:53,040 --> 00:23:56,920
Speaker 2: Wow, Luckily she's understanding. But uh, also, like, what if

449
00:23:56,920 --> 00:23:58,040
Speaker 2: you just deleted everything?

450
00:23:59,720 --> 00:24:02,520
Speaker 1: I'm that's got to be impossible. Also, how would she know?

451
00:24:03,400 --> 00:24:04,800
Speaker 1: I thought that was the first thing I thought of too.

452
00:24:04,800 --> 00:24:06,439
Speaker 1: When I was reading it, I was like, wait, she

453
00:24:06,600 --> 00:24:08,560
Speaker 1: just like deleted everything. But then I was like, wait

454
00:24:08,560 --> 00:24:11,919
Speaker 1: a second. This was like hours he was like probably

455
00:24:11,920 --> 00:24:14,000
Speaker 1: at like you know, early am, and this was the

456
00:24:14,000 --> 00:24:16,520
Speaker 1: next morning. And then she she would have no idea

457
00:24:17,320 --> 00:24:19,439
Speaker 1: referring to and then even if she did see it,

458
00:24:19,480 --> 00:24:21,040
Speaker 1: and try like I.

459
00:24:21,160 --> 00:24:23,240
Speaker 3: Doubt a long time to delete everything.

460
00:24:23,000 --> 00:24:25,160
Speaker 1: And also like I don't I don't even know how

461
00:24:25,160 --> 00:24:27,439
Speaker 1: it works, like can't like does the network own it?

462
00:24:27,480 --> 00:24:29,920
Speaker 1: Like can you even take it down? You know? So

463
00:24:30,080 --> 00:24:37,760
Speaker 1: likes you gotta stop with that one yeah, yeah, you

464
00:24:37,800 --> 00:24:40,760
Speaker 1: gotta chill out for a sec. One one sentence of

465
00:24:40,760 --> 00:24:43,280
Speaker 1: advice that is going to change your life. Wake your

466
00:24:43,280 --> 00:24:45,360
Speaker 1: ass up, See you next time.