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Speaker 1: It is time now for today's Strawberry Letter, and if

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Speaker 1: you need advice on relationships, work, sex, parenting, and more,

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Speaker 1: please submit your Strawberry Letter to Steve BARBFM dot com.

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Speaker 1: All you have to do is click submit Strawberry Letter,

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Speaker 1: and we could be reading your letter live on the air,

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Speaker 1: just like I'm going to read this one right.

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Speaker 2: Here, right now. You never know, it could be yours.

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Speaker 2: You never know, You never know.

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Speaker 3: Buckle up and hold on tight. We got it to

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Speaker 3: you here. It is a Strawberry Letter.

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Speaker 2: Thank you. Nephew's subject. I didn't mean what I said.

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Speaker 2: Dear Stephen Shirley.

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Speaker 1: My husband and I have been married for eight years

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Speaker 1: and we've known each other fifteen years. We have been

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Speaker 1: through ups and downs like most couples, but when we argue,

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Speaker 1: it's because of something that my husband has remembered from

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Speaker 1: the past. I won't say he's insecure, but he's always

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Speaker 1: worried about me leaving him for my ex boyfriend or

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Speaker 1: this female I pooled around with one time when we

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Speaker 1: were separated.

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Speaker 2: I guess it's my fault for.

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Speaker 1: Him thinking I would leave him, because when I get mad,

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Speaker 1: I say a lot of things I do not mean.

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Speaker 2: I want to hurt him and win the argument.

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Speaker 1: I always have to fix it for days after we've

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Speaker 1: made up. The last fight we had is a lot

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Speaker 1: different because I was still mad days later and he

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Speaker 1: overheard me on the phone.

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Speaker 2: With the woman I used to fool around with.

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Speaker 1: I told her that my husband is mediocre in bed

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Speaker 1: and she has way better skills than he does. I

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Speaker 1: told her that my ex boyfriend has been begging for

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Speaker 1: me to meet up with him at a hotel huh

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Speaker 1: by his house, and I was thinking about going because

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Speaker 1: he has a lot more stamina than my husband does.

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Speaker 1: I wasn't paying attention to the camera that we have

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Speaker 1: on the front porch, or the fact that it has

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Speaker 1: a microphone on it. My husband was in the house

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Speaker 1: and heard the entire conversation.

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Speaker 2: Conversation Yeah, I continued to sit on.

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Speaker 1: The porch after my call, and he talked through the

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Speaker 1: camera to tell me to come inside. I tried to

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Speaker 1: tell him that I was still upset and I didn't

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Speaker 1: mean anything I said, but there was no way to

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Speaker 1: fix it. I really don't think my side chick has

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Speaker 1: better skills than him. I was talking bs because I

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Speaker 1: was still salty with him. I've never cheated on him

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Speaker 1: unless we were separated, So I need him to believe

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Speaker 1: that it wasn't serious. I wasn't serious. How do I

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Speaker 1: get my husband to trust me again? Please help? Wow? Hm,

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Speaker 1: trust is a hard thing and this is just not

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Speaker 1: cool what you're doing. Okay, you really really you need

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Speaker 1: to grow up. I mean you're very immature. Words hurt

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Speaker 1: words lead to actions. That's why your husband is upset.

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Speaker 1: He thinks you know because you said it, you did it,

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Speaker 1: and you need to stop saying stupid stuff that you

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Speaker 1: don't mean. You can't take any of that stuff back.

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Speaker 1: You can't take it back, period. It's common sense that

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Speaker 1: if it's the only thing you guys argue about, this

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Speaker 1: is what you say. According to you, is what you've

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Speaker 1: said in the past. That you should stop talking. Your

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Speaker 1: husband is not insecure, but like most men, he's got

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Speaker 1: an ego, a fragile ego, and no man wants to

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Speaker 1: hear that someone else has better skills than him or

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Speaker 1: more stamina than him. What is wrong with you? You

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Speaker 1: really need to stop this. I mean, even if you

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Speaker 1: say you haven't cheated, he's not gonna believe you because

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Speaker 1: he heard what you said.

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Speaker 2: He heard it coming out of your mouth.

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Speaker 1: You're playing a dangerous game here with your husband, with

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Speaker 1: your marriage, all of that trust. That's a big thing

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Speaker 1: in marriage, a very very important thing. Once it's broken,

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Speaker 1: it's really really hard to get back, if ever, if

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Speaker 1: at all. But your husband is still here, he's still

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Speaker 1: there with you, so maybe there's a chance. So you

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Speaker 1: got to stop playing with this feelings. You've got to

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Speaker 1: grow up. You're hitting way below the belt. If you

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Speaker 1: don't stop this and work on fixing your marriage and

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Speaker 1: trying to get your husband to come back around. And

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Speaker 1: these are things that you've broken, you gotta lose him.

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Speaker 2: You really are Steve.

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Speaker 4: Wow, this is really one of the more ignorant letters

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Speaker 4: we've had in a while, and we've had some ignorance.

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Speaker 4: The subject is I didn't mean what I said. The

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Speaker 4: problem is he heard you. This is your whole problem.

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Speaker 3: This whole thing is her. You know, I don't even know.

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Speaker 4: I don't even know how this dude still here is

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Speaker 4: one of the worst. Look y'all been married eight years,

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Speaker 4: y'all known each other fifteen, she said, We've been through

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Speaker 4: ups and downs like most couples. But when we arega,

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Speaker 4: see now, this ain't like most couples now not reading

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Speaker 4: this letters like most couples.

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Speaker 3: I want to tell you this right now. This is rare.

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Speaker 4: But when we augur, it's because of something that my

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Speaker 4: husband has remembered from the past. And I won't say

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Speaker 4: he's insecure, but he's always worried about me leaving him.

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Speaker 4: Now why was he worried about him leaving him? Guess

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Speaker 4: what she says for my ex boyfriend? All this female

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Speaker 4: I fool around with one time we was separated. Now,

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Speaker 4: let's just deal with that part right here. Your husband

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Speaker 4: has an awful lot to wear. Any what he looking at,

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Speaker 4: what's she looking at?

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Speaker 3: What you're looking at him? Fault? What you're looking at

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Speaker 3: her fault.

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Speaker 4: Everybody walked by is a potential threat. She can't even

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Speaker 4: really relax. If a guy walked by, that's a threat.

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Speaker 4: If a woman walked by, that's a threat. Girl, Girl,

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Speaker 4: you too much? And she did.

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Speaker 3: She said, I guess it's my fault for him thinking.

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Speaker 4: And I would leave him because when I get mad,

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Speaker 4: I say a lot of things I do not mean.

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Speaker 3: I want to hurt him and win the argument. Are

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Speaker 3: you stupid? Hurting? Don't mean you win? What is y'all

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Speaker 3: y'all have an argument trying to one up each other.

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Speaker 4: Listen when you argue with your wife, this ain't cracking

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Speaker 4: or the joneses. Your mama so fat? Your mama so fat,

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Speaker 4: she need a belt on the size of the equator. Well,

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Speaker 4: your mama so fat?

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Speaker 3: That is what this is. Are y'all arguing to one

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Speaker 3: up each other?

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Speaker 2: So immature?

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Speaker 3: That's not winning an argument?

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Speaker 1: All right, Hold on, Steve, we'll have part two of

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Speaker 1: your response coming up at twenty three minutes after the hour.

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Speaker 1: Subject of today strawberry letter. I didn't mean what I said.

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Speaker 1: We'll get back into it right after this. You're listening

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Speaker 1: Steve Harvey Morning Show.

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Speaker 1: All right, come on, Steve, let's recap today Strawberry letter,

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Speaker 1: the subject, I didn't mean what I said.

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Speaker 2: I didn't mean it.

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Speaker 3: Well, but what you're saying it for? Because y'all all

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Speaker 3: got like fools.

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Speaker 4: First of all, you've been together for fifteen years, but

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Speaker 4: you think your man is insecure because he's afraid you're

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Speaker 4: gonna leave him for your ex boyfriend.

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Speaker 3: All a female you fooled around with when y'all were separating.

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Speaker 3: Who Who's just a lot to worry about? Me? He

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Speaker 3: can't get the man, he can't. I'm going out with

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Speaker 3: the girls for happy hour, Happy hour.

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Speaker 4: With the with the what with who? See, he ain't

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Speaker 4: got to worry about who's gonna be down there? All

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Speaker 4: he gotta worry about it is people are gonna be

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Speaker 4: down there, some people.

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Speaker 3: See.

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Speaker 4: Most people gotta worry about who are all gonna be

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Speaker 4: down there? And the dude wait to hear some other

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Speaker 4: dude's names or woman wait to hear some women name.

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Speaker 4: When you say you're going to have it hour, you

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Speaker 4: first question is is people gonna be there?

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Speaker 3: Because your everybody?

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Speaker 4: And then I guess it's my fault for him thinking

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Speaker 4: I would leave him when I get mad, because I

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Speaker 4: say a lot of things I don't mean because I

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Speaker 4: want to hurt him and win the argument.

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Speaker 3: Hurting a person is how you win an argument.

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Speaker 4: No, you gotta stop thinking of winning an argument and

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Speaker 4: thinking about suddenly and if you're arguing to win, you're

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Speaker 4: not going to do that, so now and then.

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Speaker 3: You always got to fix it.

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Speaker 4: For days after we'd been made up in the last fight,

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Speaker 4: we had a lot of which was a lot different

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Speaker 4: because I was still mad days later, and he overheard

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Speaker 4: me on the phone.

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Speaker 3: With the woman I used to fool around when I

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Speaker 3: told her on the phone.

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Speaker 4: That my husband is mediocre in bed and she got

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Speaker 4: way better skills than he do.

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Speaker 3: And he heard this with the woman you used to

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Speaker 3: fool around. He heard that.

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Speaker 4: That ain't insecurity. That's not insecure. That ain't he heard it.

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Speaker 4: That's a blatant statement. And you wasn't trying to hurt

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Speaker 4: him because you was talking about him without his knowledge.

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Speaker 4: So now this ain't how you win this argument because

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Speaker 4: you're talking about the man behind his back, So you

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Speaker 4: can't say that you was trying to win an argument.

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Speaker 3: By hurting him. You wasn't even talking to you.

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Speaker 4: Then I told her that my ex boyfriend been begging

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Speaker 4: me to meet up with him at a hotel by

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Speaker 4: his house, and I was thinking about going because he

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Speaker 4: got a lot more stamina than my husband. Do No,

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Speaker 4: wait a minute, this man is here in the feeling.

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Speaker 4: First of all, he ain't got no skills.

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Speaker 3: Now, he ain't got no stamping. Snap, what is he?

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Speaker 2: The man wants to hear that?

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Speaker 3: Why is he here? See?

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Speaker 4: And then once again, you're talking to you so far

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Speaker 4: on this latter I don't even know why you still

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Speaker 4: calling me your hugs, cause I'm telling you right now this.

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Speaker 4: And so I wasn't paying attention to the camera that

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Speaker 4: we got on front porch, and he got microphone on

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Speaker 4: my husbands.

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Speaker 3: In the house, hurd the entire come and say.

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Speaker 4: I sat on the porch after the call, he talked

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Speaker 4: to the camera, told me to come inside.

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Speaker 3: I tried to tell him I was still upset and

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Speaker 3: didn't mean anything I said.

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Speaker 4: But there was no way to fix I really don't

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Speaker 4: think my side chick has better skills him. Are you

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Speaker 4: listening to what you're writing? You're so stupid, You height

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Speaker 4: stupid I see. Not only did you say stupid stuff,

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Speaker 4: stupid stuff, you height stupid stuff, you actually said, I

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Speaker 4: don't think my side chick has better skills than him?

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Speaker 2: What let her have it?

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Speaker 4: I've never cheated on him unless we were separated. What

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Speaker 4: you just y'all wasn't separated when you was in here

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Speaker 4: telling your girlfriend that she had better skills and your

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Speaker 4: ex boyfriend that you was talking about to your side

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Speaker 4: chick because she don't care, because all y'all do everything.

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Speaker 3: And I was.

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Speaker 4: Talking to BS because I was still salty with him.

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Speaker 4: Uh so I need I need him to believe that

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Speaker 4: I wasn't serious. How do I get my husband to

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Speaker 4: trust me again? Please help?

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Speaker 3: Question number one? Is he steal your husband?

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Speaker 4: See, I'm stuck with just him because you not my wife,

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Speaker 4: because you belong.

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Speaker 3: To too many people.

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Speaker 4: You the other woman, you got a side chick cheating

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Speaker 4: with you, you got a boyfriend.

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Speaker 3: I'm just gonna be realsh.

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Speaker 2: This is one.

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Speaker 3: This is on.

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Speaker 4: This ain't no marriage trade and quit asking us fixed

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Speaker 4: though that's unfixable. Y'all need bish jakeson somebody like this

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Speaker 4: because I ain't got nothing, I don't know, just too

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Speaker 4: many people in here, ooh lord, Oh, here come to waitress. Oh,

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Speaker 4: here come the matrix, Here come to wait Oh the dishwasher.

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Speaker 3: Oh the bus boy. Oh look at that.

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Speaker 4: Oh look at this girl over here sitting. Who was

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Speaker 4: this man just rubbed up against me. It's just too

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Speaker 4: many people in mere. I'm confused, I'm hot, I'm all this.

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Speaker 4: It's just too much going on. Child, I can't even eat.

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Speaker 4: Everybody in here flying to me. I'm just slobbling on myself.

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Speaker 4: It's too much, all.

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Speaker 1: Right, Please leave your comments on today's Strawberry Letter like.

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Speaker 4: This over I'm like, all it's about sixty five people

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Speaker 4: in here.

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Speaker 1: I tell to Steve Harvey at them dot com and

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Speaker 1: check out the Strawberry Letter podcast on demand as well.

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Speaker 2: You're listening to the Steve Harvey Morning Show.