1 00:00:04,120 --> 00:00:09,200 Speaker 1: Everybody. It's Bill Courtney. Welcome to the shop. Hi Alex. 2 00:00:09,360 --> 00:00:11,440 Speaker 2: Hey Bill, let's get into it this time. We don't 3 00:00:11,480 --> 00:00:12,040 Speaker 2: have much time. 4 00:00:12,160 --> 00:00:14,319 Speaker 1: We do want to get into the shop. Talk. 5 00:00:14,920 --> 00:00:17,320 Speaker 3: Well, no, we got to talk about the shop. Oh man, 6 00:00:17,760 --> 00:00:19,920 Speaker 3: I mean I'm going to give you an extra two 7 00:00:19,960 --> 00:00:23,240 Speaker 3: minutes to talk about the shop. Shop talk number seventy seven. 8 00:00:23,280 --> 00:00:27,440 Speaker 3: What's the number, oh oc Brown from Undefeated? Oh really, 9 00:00:27,840 --> 00:00:31,840 Speaker 3: number seventy seven. There's something If. 10 00:00:31,720 --> 00:00:34,120 Speaker 2: It wasn't for us, C, your life might have been different. 11 00:00:34,280 --> 00:00:36,959 Speaker 2: What's uh, It's actually interesting to think about it that way. 12 00:00:36,960 --> 00:00:39,120 Speaker 2: If it wasn't for USC, your life might have been different. 13 00:00:39,280 --> 00:00:41,159 Speaker 1: But for a lot of kids, my life, you and 14 00:00:41,159 --> 00:00:42,000 Speaker 1: I wouldn't know each other. 15 00:00:42,120 --> 00:00:43,440 Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, pretty crazy. 16 00:00:43,560 --> 00:00:49,160 Speaker 1: That's it all right? In the Atlantic, what kids told 17 00:00:49,240 --> 00:00:53,200 Speaker 1: us about how to get them off their phones? Children 18 00:00:53,280 --> 00:00:55,960 Speaker 1: who were raised on screens need more freedom out in 19 00:00:56,000 --> 00:00:56,680 Speaker 1: the real world. 20 00:00:56,960 --> 00:01:04,320 Speaker 2: By I don't know, Thenarsknes, Lenorskansy it's Lenor'skanesy. Yeah, and 21 00:01:04,400 --> 00:01:06,680 Speaker 2: Jonathan hed and then what's the last guy's name, I 22 00:01:06,720 --> 00:01:10,280 Speaker 2: don't know, Zach Rosch Okay, yeah, ok, Raush probably, but yeah, 23 00:01:10,360 --> 00:01:10,720 Speaker 2: keep going. 24 00:01:10,800 --> 00:01:13,960 Speaker 1: All right, So here's the deal. Everybody. I already loved 25 00:01:13,959 --> 00:01:18,000 Speaker 1: this because just read it, I'm sick of kids on 26 00:01:18,040 --> 00:01:21,959 Speaker 1: their phones all the time. And do you know, do 27 00:01:22,000 --> 00:01:26,360 Speaker 1: you know, seriously, there's a pediatric study and I'm gonna 28 00:01:26,400 --> 00:01:29,400 Speaker 1: butcher this and I wish you would find this next time. 29 00:01:29,440 --> 00:01:34,760 Speaker 1: But it's like the number of broken bones and children 30 00:01:35,319 --> 00:01:39,959 Speaker 1: has decreased by like, I don't know, something like eighty 31 00:01:40,040 --> 00:01:41,640 Speaker 1: percent over the last two decades. 32 00:01:41,720 --> 00:01:43,760 Speaker 2: Earlier, we kind of riffed on that in the Vanessa 33 00:01:43,840 --> 00:01:46,720 Speaker 2: Lias interview, but we didn't talk about the data. 34 00:01:46,760 --> 00:01:51,080 Speaker 1: But it's something like eighty percent. Huh. And that sounds great, right, 35 00:01:51,280 --> 00:01:54,720 Speaker 1: because you know, who wants to break a bunch of kids' bones? 36 00:01:55,040 --> 00:01:59,680 Speaker 1: But actually it leads to more problems down the road 37 00:01:59,720 --> 00:02:02,960 Speaker 1: because kids' bones are stronger from all the exercises of 38 00:02:03,000 --> 00:02:08,840 Speaker 1: stuff they got because they're fat eating twinkies, by devices 39 00:02:09,000 --> 00:02:11,000 Speaker 1: that we as parents give them. 40 00:02:11,080 --> 00:02:13,480 Speaker 2: And more importantly, what it means is you're not taking risks. 41 00:02:14,040 --> 00:02:16,760 Speaker 1: Yeah, that's a good point too. Yeah, So anyway, we're 42 00:02:16,760 --> 00:02:18,880 Speaker 1: going to talk about this stuff right after these brief 43 00:02:18,919 --> 00:02:40,960 Speaker 1: messages from our center sponsors. All right, everybody, welcome back. 44 00:02:41,200 --> 00:02:43,480 Speaker 1: What kids told us about how to get them off 45 00:02:43,520 --> 00:02:45,800 Speaker 1: their phones. So we're always trying to talk about a 46 00:02:46,560 --> 00:02:48,880 Speaker 1: well as usual, why don't we go to the source 47 00:02:48,919 --> 00:02:51,120 Speaker 1: and ask them? So apparently we're going to learn what 48 00:02:51,240 --> 00:02:54,239 Speaker 1: kids told us about how to get them off their phones. 49 00:02:54,360 --> 00:02:57,440 Speaker 1: Children who were raised on screens need more freedom out 50 00:02:57,560 --> 00:03:01,160 Speaker 1: in the real world. Even read the thing yet, But 51 00:03:01,240 --> 00:03:05,160 Speaker 1: I'm just going to paraphrase here. Quit being helicopter parents, Okay. 52 00:03:06,320 --> 00:03:09,280 Speaker 1: One common explanation for why children spend so much of 53 00:03:09,320 --> 00:03:13,280 Speaker 1: their free time on screens goes like this, smartphones and 54 00:03:13,320 --> 00:03:16,840 Speaker 1: social media platforms are addicting them. Kids stare at their 55 00:03:16,840 --> 00:03:20,519 Speaker 1: devices and socialize online instead of in person because that's 56 00:03:20,520 --> 00:03:24,320 Speaker 1: what tech has trained them to want. Boy, that's paraphrases 57 00:03:24,440 --> 00:03:27,360 Speaker 1: basically what a lot of people think and believe. But 58 00:03:28,280 --> 00:03:31,280 Speaker 1: this misses a key part of the story. The three 59 00:03:31,320 --> 00:03:34,160 Speaker 1: of us. These three of us writers are. 60 00:03:34,520 --> 00:03:38,040 Speaker 2: Leonora Narsknesi, Jonathan Hayden, Zack Ross. 61 00:03:38,320 --> 00:03:41,560 Speaker 1: All Right, these three people collaborated with the Hair's Poll 62 00:03:41,720 --> 00:03:45,680 Speaker 1: to survey a group of Americans whose perspectives don't often 63 00:03:45,720 --> 00:03:50,840 Speaker 1: show up in national data. Kids. What they told us 64 00:03:50,840 --> 00:03:54,960 Speaker 1: offers a comprehensive picture of how American childhood is changing, and, 65 00:03:56,120 --> 00:03:59,720 Speaker 1: most importantly, how to make it better. In March, the 66 00:04:00,120 --> 00:04:02,880 Speaker 1: poll surveyed more than five hundred kids ages eight to 67 00:04:02,960 --> 00:04:06,280 Speaker 1: twelve across the United States, who were assured that their 68 00:04:06,320 --> 00:04:10,000 Speaker 1: answers would remain private. The kids didn't want their parents 69 00:04:10,040 --> 00:04:14,480 Speaker 1: to know. That's funny. They offered unmistakable evidence that the 70 00:04:14,600 --> 00:04:18,880 Speaker 1: phone based childhood is in full force. A majority reported 71 00:04:18,960 --> 00:04:21,960 Speaker 1: having smartphones, and about half of the ten to twelve 72 00:04:22,040 --> 00:04:25,440 Speaker 1: year olds said that most or all of their friends 73 00:04:25,560 --> 00:04:27,640 Speaker 1: use social media. How old are your kids? 74 00:04:28,360 --> 00:04:30,800 Speaker 2: So? My oldest too, that this is relevant for are 75 00:04:31,120 --> 00:04:31,839 Speaker 2: ten and eleven? 76 00:04:32,560 --> 00:04:32,760 Speaker 1: Yeah? 77 00:04:33,480 --> 00:04:35,919 Speaker 2: Yeah, And I've refused to let them have horphones, but 78 00:04:35,960 --> 00:04:36,760 Speaker 2: most of their friends do. 79 00:04:37,160 --> 00:04:38,560 Speaker 1: I Georgie six, all. 80 00:04:38,520 --> 00:04:44,640 Speaker 2: Right, so six, oh geez, six, eight, ten, and eleven. 81 00:04:45,640 --> 00:04:49,000 Speaker 1: I mean three of them are in the focus group. Yeah, yeah, 82 00:04:49,200 --> 00:04:52,599 Speaker 1: do your kids have smartphones? When? How old will they be? 83 00:04:54,640 --> 00:04:56,440 Speaker 1: How old will they be when you let them have them? 84 00:04:56,640 --> 00:04:57,799 Speaker 2: I mean at least fourteen? 85 00:04:58,120 --> 00:04:58,599 Speaker 1: I love that. 86 00:04:58,800 --> 00:05:01,640 Speaker 2: Yeah, Yeah, anyway, going, I want you to we've ripped on. 87 00:05:02,160 --> 00:05:04,160 Speaker 2: I don't want us to complain about the topic too much. 88 00:05:04,160 --> 00:05:06,800 Speaker 2: There's fascinating stuff in here to get into, all right. 89 00:05:06,680 --> 00:05:10,800 Speaker 1: I'll keep going. All right, So about half of the 90 00:05:10,839 --> 00:05:12,840 Speaker 1: ten to twelve year old said that most of all 91 00:05:12,880 --> 00:05:16,880 Speaker 1: their friends use social media. This digital technology has given 92 00:05:16,960 --> 00:05:20,640 Speaker 1: kids access to virtual worlds where they're allowed to roam 93 00:05:20,680 --> 00:05:23,680 Speaker 1: far more freely than in the real one. About seventy 94 00:05:23,680 --> 00:05:25,039 Speaker 1: five percent of kids a change. 95 00:05:25,160 --> 00:05:26,960 Speaker 2: Think about that for a second, though, I know it 96 00:05:27,040 --> 00:05:28,520 Speaker 2: isn't that a wild I've never even thought of it. 97 00:05:28,600 --> 00:05:29,440 Speaker 2: That's such a good line. 98 00:05:30,360 --> 00:05:34,400 Speaker 1: The digital technology has given kids access to virtual worlds 99 00:05:34,560 --> 00:05:37,479 Speaker 1: where they're allowed to roam far more freely than the 100 00:05:37,520 --> 00:05:40,080 Speaker 1: real one. The point is, I don't know if that 101 00:05:40,200 --> 00:05:43,080 Speaker 1: line is indicative of a good thing or a bad thing. 102 00:05:43,080 --> 00:05:46,159 Speaker 1: I would say a bad thing for Kidsy's age. About 103 00:05:46,200 --> 00:05:49,880 Speaker 1: seventy five percent of kids ages nine through twelve regularly 104 00:05:50,360 --> 00:05:54,960 Speaker 1: play the online game Robologues, where they can interact with 105 00:05:55,000 --> 00:05:58,160 Speaker 1: friends and even strangers, but most of the children are 106 00:05:58,200 --> 00:06:01,039 Speaker 1: surveys said they aren't allowed to be out in public 107 00:06:01,160 --> 00:06:07,720 Speaker 1: at all without an adult. There you go. Most of 108 00:06:07,760 --> 00:06:10,720 Speaker 1: the kids survey can't walk around in public without an 109 00:06:10,760 --> 00:06:13,839 Speaker 1: adult because parents want to protect them, but then they 110 00:06:13,920 --> 00:06:16,960 Speaker 1: pay for it, give them advice and give them access 111 00:06:17,000 --> 00:06:21,720 Speaker 1: to room the world with strangers, many of whom are 112 00:06:22,640 --> 00:06:28,000 Speaker 1: grown creeps trying to do things with your children. Just 113 00:06:28,360 --> 00:06:31,480 Speaker 1: remember that fewer than half of the eight to nine 114 00:06:31,560 --> 00:06:34,440 Speaker 1: year olds have gone down a grocery store all alone. 115 00:06:34,800 --> 00:06:37,920 Speaker 1: More than quarter aren't allowed to play unsupervised, even though 116 00:06:37,960 --> 00:06:41,880 Speaker 1: on front yard, but yet they can roam around virtually 117 00:06:41,920 --> 00:06:46,160 Speaker 1: in this world. These are the exact kinds of freedoms 118 00:06:46,160 --> 00:06:49,240 Speaker 1: that kids told us they long for. We ask them 119 00:06:49,279 --> 00:06:51,720 Speaker 1: to pick their favorite way to spend time with friends, 120 00:06:52,240 --> 00:06:56,560 Speaker 1: unstructured play such as shooting hoops and exploring their neighborhoods, 121 00:06:56,600 --> 00:07:01,159 Speaker 1: participating in activities organized by adults, just playing Little League 122 00:07:01,160 --> 00:07:05,240 Speaker 1: and doing ballet, or socializing online. There was a clear winner. 123 00:07:06,360 --> 00:07:09,400 Speaker 1: An image of a graph showing responses to the question 124 00:07:09,600 --> 00:07:12,920 Speaker 1: how would you rather spend time with friends? Forty five 125 00:07:12,920 --> 00:07:17,600 Speaker 1: percent of the respondents said free play in person, thirty 126 00:07:17,600 --> 00:07:21,720 Speaker 1: percent said organized activity in person, and only twenty five 127 00:07:21,760 --> 00:07:26,080 Speaker 1: percent said online activity. Children want to meet up in person, 128 00:07:26,200 --> 00:07:29,960 Speaker 1: no screens or supervision, but because so many parents restrict 129 00:07:30,000 --> 00:07:32,840 Speaker 1: their ability to socialize in the real world on their own, 130 00:07:33,520 --> 00:07:36,440 Speaker 1: kids resort to the one thing that allows them to 131 00:07:36,480 --> 00:07:40,720 Speaker 1: hang out with no adults hovering their phones. Since the eighties, 132 00:07:41,160 --> 00:07:44,520 Speaker 1: parents have grown more and more afraid that unsupervised time 133 00:07:44,600 --> 00:07:48,080 Speaker 1: will expose their kids to physical or emotional harm. In 134 00:07:48,120 --> 00:07:51,480 Speaker 1: another recent Hairs poll, we asked parents what they thought 135 00:07:51,480 --> 00:07:53,640 Speaker 1: would happen if two ten year olds played in a 136 00:07:53,680 --> 00:07:57,480 Speaker 1: local part without adults. A realm sixty percent thought that 137 00:07:57,560 --> 00:08:02,040 Speaker 1: children would likely get injured. Half though they would likely 138 00:08:02,120 --> 00:08:07,120 Speaker 1: get have be ducted. I'm sorry for laughing, but good 139 00:08:07,480 --> 00:08:15,680 Speaker 1: grief ten year olds. When I was ten, I roamed everywhere, 140 00:08:15,840 --> 00:08:18,200 Speaker 1: and yeah, I might have gotten hurt or something, but 141 00:08:18,520 --> 00:08:20,800 Speaker 1: I mean, it wasn't anything sustain in. 142 00:08:20,800 --> 00:08:22,760 Speaker 2: The reality is most kids are in towns like I'm 143 00:08:22,760 --> 00:08:24,560 Speaker 2: in an Oxford that are really safe. 144 00:08:24,920 --> 00:08:29,080 Speaker 1: Yeah, roam, Oh, here we go. We're about to put 145 00:08:29,120 --> 00:08:32,440 Speaker 1: some data on what I just said. These intuitions don't 146 00:08:32,440 --> 00:08:37,000 Speaker 1: even begin to resimble reality. According to the Warwick Carns, 147 00:08:37,200 --> 00:08:41,040 Speaker 1: the author of How to Live Dangerously, kidnapping the United 148 00:08:41,040 --> 00:08:43,839 Speaker 1: States is so rare that a child would have to 149 00:08:43,880 --> 00:08:47,480 Speaker 1: be outside unsupervised on average seven hundred and fifty thousand 150 00:08:47,559 --> 00:08:49,840 Speaker 1: years before being snatched by a stranger. 151 00:08:50,920 --> 00:08:52,600 Speaker 2: I don't know who'd want to kidnap my kids? 152 00:08:52,640 --> 00:08:55,440 Speaker 1: Good luck, Yeah, that's right. There's a couple of my 153 00:08:55,600 --> 00:08:58,679 Speaker 1: kids you'd probably kidnap and bring back. Just say here, 154 00:08:58,920 --> 00:09:03,640 Speaker 1: I don't want anything to take them. But listen to that. 155 00:09:04,480 --> 00:09:07,960 Speaker 1: Kidnapping is so rare that a child would have to 156 00:09:07,960 --> 00:09:11,880 Speaker 1: be outside unsupervised for on average seven hundred and fifty 157 00:09:11,920 --> 00:09:16,200 Speaker 1: thousand years before being snatched. Parents know their neighborhood best, 158 00:09:16,280 --> 00:09:20,400 Speaker 1: of course, and they should assess them care. But the 159 00:09:20,520 --> 00:09:25,240 Speaker 1: tendency to overestimate risk comes with its own danger. Without 160 00:09:25,360 --> 00:09:28,200 Speaker 1: we're a world freedom, children don't get the chance to 161 00:09:28,240 --> 00:09:33,240 Speaker 1: develop confidence, confidence, and the ability to solve everyday issues. Indeed, 162 00:09:33,720 --> 00:09:37,680 Speaker 1: independence and is unsupervised play are associated with positive mental 163 00:09:37,679 --> 00:09:41,040 Speaker 1: health outcomes. What country were we talking about. 164 00:09:40,800 --> 00:09:46,920 Speaker 2: Recas Switzerland with Vanessa? Yeah, yeah, and their dealer is 165 00:09:46,920 --> 00:09:49,679 Speaker 2: actually that episode this is no, Yeah, that episode will 166 00:09:49,679 --> 00:09:52,240 Speaker 2: be out. Sorry, go ahead, So you might want to 167 00:09:52,240 --> 00:09:54,480 Speaker 2: refer to the Vanessa Lias episode. 168 00:09:54,559 --> 00:09:56,640 Speaker 1: Yeah, because they just let their kids do whatever the 169 00:09:56,640 --> 00:09:57,120 Speaker 1: all they want. 170 00:09:57,280 --> 00:10:00,760 Speaker 2: Actually, at their scos kids' school, you can drop them off. 171 00:10:00,800 --> 00:10:01,600 Speaker 2: They have to walk their. 172 00:10:01,559 --> 00:10:04,160 Speaker 1: Base, They have to walk to school or allow to 173 00:10:04,240 --> 00:10:08,000 Speaker 1: drop them off or pick them up to teach them. 174 00:10:08,760 --> 00:10:12,040 Speaker 1: Let's see, what were these words to teach them independence 175 00:10:12,480 --> 00:10:19,240 Speaker 1: and the other stuff. Okay, still I'll go back. Without 176 00:10:19,280 --> 00:10:22,840 Speaker 1: real world freedom, children don't get the chance to develop competence, confidence, 177 00:10:22,840 --> 00:10:26,520 Speaker 1: and the ability to solve everyday problems. Indeed, independence and 178 00:10:26,600 --> 00:10:31,480 Speaker 1: unsupervised players associated with positive mental health outcomes. Still, parents 179 00:10:31,520 --> 00:10:34,640 Speaker 1: spend more time supervising their kids than parents did in 180 00:10:34,679 --> 00:10:38,720 Speaker 1: the sixties, even though they now work more and have 181 00:10:38,840 --> 00:10:43,640 Speaker 1: fewer children. Across all income levels, families have come to 182 00:10:43,679 --> 00:10:46,680 Speaker 1: believe that organized activities are the key to get safety 183 00:10:46,720 --> 00:10:51,960 Speaker 1: and success. So sandlock games gave way to travel baseball 184 00:10:52,080 --> 00:10:55,000 Speaker 1: Cartwell's at the park gave way to competitive cheer teams. 185 00:10:55,600 --> 00:10:58,040 Speaker 1: Kids have been strapped into the back of the seat 186 00:10:58,120 --> 00:11:00,920 Speaker 1: for their lives, dropped off, picked up up, and overheld. 187 00:11:01,600 --> 00:11:05,640 Speaker 1: As their independence is dwindled, their anxiety and depression have spiked, 188 00:11:06,520 --> 00:11:09,400 Speaker 1: and they aren't the only one suffering. In twenty twenty three, 189 00:11:09,480 --> 00:11:13,760 Speaker 1: the Search in general cited intensive caregiving as one reason 190 00:11:13,840 --> 00:11:19,240 Speaker 1: for today's parents are more stressed than ever. That's so interesting. 191 00:11:20,320 --> 00:11:24,000 Speaker 1: Kids will always have more spare hours than adults can supervise, 192 00:11:24,200 --> 00:11:28,360 Speaker 1: a gap that devices now fill. Go outside has been 193 00:11:28,440 --> 00:11:32,320 Speaker 1: quite replaced with go online. The Internet is one of 194 00:11:32,320 --> 00:11:37,320 Speaker 1: the only escape patches from childhoods grown anxious, small, and sad. 195 00:11:38,240 --> 00:11:43,000 Speaker 1: We certainly don't blame parents for this. The social norms, communities, infrastructure, 196 00:11:43,040 --> 00:11:46,400 Speaker 1: and institutions that once facilitated free play. Ever, rod it 197 00:11:47,000 --> 00:11:49,520 Speaker 1: telling children to go outside doesn't work so well when 198 00:11:49,559 --> 00:11:52,600 Speaker 1: no one else's kids are there. That's why we're so 199 00:11:52,720 --> 00:11:55,440 Speaker 1: glad that groups around the country experimenting with ways to 200 00:11:55,520 --> 00:12:00,199 Speaker 1: rebuild American childhood rooting get in freedom, responsibility, and friendship. 201 00:12:00,760 --> 00:12:04,480 Speaker 1: In Piedmont, California, a network of parents started dropping their 202 00:12:04,520 --> 00:12:07,239 Speaker 1: kids off at the park every Friday to play and supervise. 203 00:12:07,920 --> 00:12:10,960 Speaker 1: Sometimes the kids argue or get bored, which is good 204 00:12:11,600 --> 00:12:14,600 Speaker 1: learning to handle boredom and conflict as an essential part 205 00:12:14,640 --> 00:12:18,640 Speaker 1: of a child's development. Elsewhere, churches, libraries, and schools are 206 00:12:18,679 --> 00:12:23,360 Speaker 1: creating screen free play clubs to ease the transition away 207 00:12:23,400 --> 00:12:27,400 Speaker 1: from screens to supervision. The Outside Play Lab at the 208 00:12:27,480 --> 00:12:31,200 Speaker 1: University of British Columbia developed a free online tool that 209 00:12:31,280 --> 00:12:33,679 Speaker 1: helps parents figure out how to give their kids more 210 00:12:33,720 --> 00:12:37,719 Speaker 1: outdoor time and why they should. Just a brief and 211 00:12:37,800 --> 00:12:41,000 Speaker 1: elude here, the fact that we have to give parents 212 00:12:41,160 --> 00:12:44,040 Speaker 1: tools about how to let their children go play outside 213 00:12:44,280 --> 00:12:47,200 Speaker 1: in and of itself is endemic of a problem. I 214 00:12:47,240 --> 00:13:16,440 Speaker 1: think we'll be right back. More than a thousand schools 215 00:13:16,520 --> 00:13:20,240 Speaker 1: nationwide have begun using a free program from let Grow, 216 00:13:20,360 --> 00:13:23,360 Speaker 1: a nonprofit. The two of us, Lenora and John, helped 217 00:13:23,360 --> 00:13:27,640 Speaker 1: found a foster children's independence k through twelve. Students in 218 00:13:27,679 --> 00:13:31,000 Speaker 1: the program get a monthly homework assignment do something new 219 00:13:31,040 --> 00:13:34,520 Speaker 1: on your own with your parents' permission, but without their help. 220 00:13:35,360 --> 00:13:39,480 Speaker 1: Kids use the prompt to run errands, climb trees, cook meals. 221 00:13:40,120 --> 00:13:44,000 Speaker 1: Some finally learn how to tie their own shoes. Here's 222 00:13:44,080 --> 00:13:47,520 Speaker 1: what one fourth grader with intellectual disabilities wrote in our 223 00:13:47,559 --> 00:13:53,560 Speaker 1: own words and spelling, this is my fist let it 224 00:13:53,600 --> 00:13:58,120 Speaker 1: Go project. I went shopping by myself. I handle it will, 225 00:13:58,640 --> 00:14:00,880 Speaker 1: but to check out was a little bit hard, but 226 00:14:01,080 --> 00:14:03,760 Speaker 1: was fun to do. I learned that I'm brave and 227 00:14:03,800 --> 00:14:08,199 Speaker 1: go shop by myself. I love the project. Other hopeful 228 00:14:08,240 --> 00:14:12,000 Speaker 1: signs are emerging. The New Jersey based Balance Project is 229 00:14:12,040 --> 00:14:15,560 Speaker 1: helping fifty communities reduce scream time and restore free play 230 00:14:15,600 --> 00:14:19,080 Speaker 1: for kids, employing the four new norms that John lays 231 00:14:19,080 --> 00:14:25,240 Speaker 1: out in The Anxious Generation. This summer, Newburyport, Massachusetts is 232 00:14:25,320 --> 00:14:28,000 Speaker 1: hating out prizes each week to kids who want to 233 00:14:28,040 --> 00:14:31,000 Speaker 1: try something new on their own. Leg Grow has a 234 00:14:31,040 --> 00:14:33,400 Speaker 1: toolkit for other communities that want to do the same 235 00:14:33,960 --> 00:14:37,800 Speaker 1: the Boy Scouts. The rebrand, now rebranded as Scouting America 236 00:14:37,840 --> 00:14:40,640 Speaker 1: and open to all young people, is finally growing again. 237 00:14:41,240 --> 00:14:44,200 Speaker 1: We could go on what we see in the data 238 00:14:44,400 --> 00:14:47,360 Speaker 1: and from the stories parents send us is both simple 239 00:14:47,480 --> 00:14:52,280 Speaker 1: and poignant. Kids being raised on screens long for freedom. 240 00:14:52,840 --> 00:14:56,040 Speaker 1: It's like they're homesick from a world they've never known. Boy, 241 00:14:56,080 --> 00:15:00,320 Speaker 1: that's a cool line granting them more freedom. They feel 242 00:15:00,400 --> 00:15:03,040 Speaker 1: uncomfortable at first, but if parents want their kids to 243 00:15:03,080 --> 00:15:05,640 Speaker 1: put down their phones, they need to open the front door. 244 00:15:06,200 --> 00:15:09,040 Speaker 1: Nearly three quarters of the children are survey agreed with 245 00:15:09,120 --> 00:15:12,680 Speaker 1: a statement, I would spend less time online if there 246 00:15:12,680 --> 00:15:15,120 Speaker 1: were more friends in my neighborhood to play with in person, 247 00:15:15,840 --> 00:15:19,480 Speaker 1: Stephanie H. Murray. Would adults lost when kids stop playing 248 00:15:19,480 --> 00:15:23,120 Speaker 1: in the street. If nothing changes, Silicon Valley will keep 249 00:15:23,120 --> 00:15:27,640 Speaker 1: supplying kids with ever more sophisticated AI friends that are 250 00:15:27,680 --> 00:15:30,680 Speaker 1: always available and will cater to a child's every whim. 251 00:15:31,200 --> 00:15:35,240 Speaker 1: But AI will never fulfill a child's deepest desires. Even 252 00:15:35,280 --> 00:15:39,200 Speaker 1: this generation of digital natives still longs for what most 253 00:15:39,240 --> 00:15:44,040 Speaker 1: of their parents had, time with friends in person without adults. 254 00:15:44,560 --> 00:15:48,240 Speaker 1: Today's kids want to spend their childhood in the real world. 255 00:15:48,440 --> 00:15:53,320 Speaker 1: It's our job to give it back to them. Holy smokes, 256 00:15:53,400 --> 00:15:55,240 Speaker 1: I don't have an hour to sit here and go 257 00:15:55,280 --> 00:15:57,040 Speaker 1: on about this. You've got two minutes. 258 00:15:57,080 --> 00:15:59,120 Speaker 2: If you got a hard stop, that's en sorright. 259 00:15:59,200 --> 00:16:02,000 Speaker 1: But we got maybe two to six. But the point is, 260 00:16:03,160 --> 00:16:10,160 Speaker 1: that's how I'm bragging on Lisa. But man, I'm telling you, 261 00:16:10,240 --> 00:16:13,320 Speaker 1: she would sling the door open after breakfast during the 262 00:16:13,360 --> 00:16:19,400 Speaker 1: summers and say get in the yard. And there were 263 00:16:19,880 --> 00:16:23,120 Speaker 1: a couple of other groups of kids. There were some 264 00:16:23,240 --> 00:16:26,240 Speaker 1: helicopter parents who didn't let their precious babies come outside 265 00:16:26,240 --> 00:16:28,440 Speaker 1: and get Skindny's. But there were there were, And we 266 00:16:28,560 --> 00:16:33,560 Speaker 1: lived and we weren't in a neighborhood where houses were 267 00:16:33,600 --> 00:16:36,000 Speaker 1: just lined up, so there was space. But I mean, 268 00:16:36,080 --> 00:16:40,240 Speaker 1: our kids wandered half a mile from the house playing 269 00:16:40,320 --> 00:16:43,120 Speaker 1: kick the can. There's no doubt they knocked on people's 270 00:16:43,120 --> 00:16:45,920 Speaker 1: doors and ran and did stuff they shouldn't do. I mean, 271 00:16:46,040 --> 00:16:49,480 Speaker 1: I'm sure of it, but you know what, and they did. 272 00:16:49,600 --> 00:16:52,760 Speaker 1: They came back scraped and bruised and sweaty and red 273 00:16:52,800 --> 00:16:57,280 Speaker 1: and everything else. But thank goodness, Lisa did that with 274 00:16:57,320 --> 00:17:02,520 Speaker 1: our kids. And we didn't fight the devices. We waited. 275 00:17:03,000 --> 00:17:07,679 Speaker 1: We did cell phones on everybody's fifteenth birthday, and I 276 00:17:07,720 --> 00:17:12,080 Speaker 1: still am not sure if that's earlier late, but we 277 00:17:12,160 --> 00:17:16,080 Speaker 1: did not do screen dumb and Max and Will were 278 00:17:16,119 --> 00:17:19,679 Speaker 1: allowed one hour of video games a day and that 279 00:17:19,840 --> 00:17:23,760 Speaker 1: was it. And you know, my kids are not perfect, 280 00:17:24,040 --> 00:17:27,240 Speaker 1: and they in fact, they're pretty flawed. But the one 281 00:17:27,280 --> 00:17:32,560 Speaker 1: thing they are they're social. They are very social human beings, 282 00:17:32,600 --> 00:17:34,879 Speaker 1: and they like to have fun and they like to laugh, 283 00:17:35,000 --> 00:17:39,400 Speaker 1: and they are creative and even as young adults, they 284 00:17:40,240 --> 00:17:43,440 Speaker 1: they are interested in new things. And I think it's 285 00:17:43,480 --> 00:17:45,680 Speaker 1: because they're all curious too. 286 00:17:45,800 --> 00:17:48,119 Speaker 2: I mean, I don't really know Maggie, but like Max, 287 00:17:48,800 --> 00:17:51,359 Speaker 2: Will and Molly are definitely all curious. I mean, you 288 00:17:51,359 --> 00:17:54,679 Speaker 2: remember Max, you know, came in here. Yeah, well we 289 00:17:54,760 --> 00:17:58,240 Speaker 2: did our thing, yeah, and he had some super powerful 290 00:17:58,320 --> 00:18:01,639 Speaker 2: lines of like me and my dad used to not 291 00:18:01,680 --> 00:18:03,240 Speaker 2: be on the same side of the field and like 292 00:18:03,359 --> 00:18:05,639 Speaker 2: now we are. And I'm forgetting the exact nature of it, 293 00:18:05,680 --> 00:18:07,199 Speaker 2: but he said a lot of beautiful things. 294 00:18:07,920 --> 00:18:11,480 Speaker 1: Macs a great kid. But the point is, I think 295 00:18:11,520 --> 00:18:15,920 Speaker 1: their curiosity and all of that comes from their socialization 296 00:18:16,040 --> 00:18:20,560 Speaker 1: as children, and their socializations children's comes from the fact 297 00:18:20,560 --> 00:18:23,679 Speaker 1: that when I was at work, Lisa kicked their ass 298 00:18:23,720 --> 00:18:25,840 Speaker 1: out the door and told them to go outside and play. 299 00:18:26,960 --> 00:18:32,280 Speaker 1: And I genuinely believe that, and so because that's my experience, 300 00:18:33,680 --> 00:18:40,080 Speaker 1: that's why I'm constantly talking about and candidly how disgusting 301 00:18:40,200 --> 00:18:45,000 Speaker 1: helicoptering is. I mean, you're shutting down your children's ability 302 00:18:45,040 --> 00:18:47,520 Speaker 1: to develop, and we got to let them get out there. 303 00:18:48,000 --> 00:18:51,920 Speaker 1: And what happens to this army of normal folks if 304 00:18:51,960 --> 00:18:57,679 Speaker 1: we don't have people who have the intellectual curiosity to 305 00:18:57,760 --> 00:19:00,520 Speaker 1: engage because they never learned how his kids unless it's 306 00:19:00,560 --> 00:19:03,080 Speaker 1: online with some stranger that's got an avatar. 307 00:19:03,720 --> 00:19:06,040 Speaker 2: So in like one sense they mentioned the article too, 308 00:19:06,040 --> 00:19:09,639 Speaker 2: it's helicoptering with the physical world, but then it's the 309 00:19:09,680 --> 00:19:11,240 Speaker 2: opposite of that with the online world. 310 00:19:11,400 --> 00:19:14,880 Speaker 1: Yeah, that's the other thing, that's with the real danger. 311 00:19:15,800 --> 00:19:19,800 Speaker 1: You're not even you're not even you're not even connected 312 00:19:19,960 --> 00:19:22,639 Speaker 1: as a parent to what the world danger is. When 313 00:19:22,680 --> 00:19:24,920 Speaker 1: you won't let your kid outside but you fill their 314 00:19:24,920 --> 00:19:28,159 Speaker 1: time with online stuff. The world dangers there. There are 315 00:19:29,359 --> 00:19:32,919 Speaker 1: there are horrible people in places in the world that 316 00:19:33,000 --> 00:19:36,840 Speaker 1: can get online and send your kids horrible pictures and 317 00:19:38,040 --> 00:19:40,920 Speaker 1: convince them to do awful things and just hype. 318 00:19:40,960 --> 00:19:43,440 Speaker 2: I mean, with my girls you know, they would they 319 00:19:43,480 --> 00:19:46,720 Speaker 2: know like way too much about sex, like ages eight 320 00:19:46,760 --> 00:19:48,879 Speaker 2: and nine, just from the culture and all the stuff 321 00:19:48,880 --> 00:19:52,200 Speaker 2: online and this hyper sexualized music and video content and 322 00:19:52,240 --> 00:19:54,640 Speaker 2: like that's all out there if you just let them 323 00:19:54,640 --> 00:19:55,360 Speaker 2: realm the internet. 324 00:19:55,560 --> 00:19:58,040 Speaker 1: Yeah, and they're not going to find that climbing the 325 00:19:58,080 --> 00:20:01,560 Speaker 1: top of a tree, not gonna climb find that building 326 00:20:01,560 --> 00:20:04,520 Speaker 1: a fort. They're not gonna find that plane kick the can. 327 00:20:05,160 --> 00:20:09,679 Speaker 1: So where's the danger. Danger's online? And the alternative danger 328 00:20:09,800 --> 00:20:12,880 Speaker 1: is so what if they skin any or break an arm? 329 00:20:13,080 --> 00:20:15,440 Speaker 1: Who cares? They're gonna be all right. Let them go. 330 00:20:15,600 --> 00:20:18,280 Speaker 1: Let them be kids. And It's been one of my 331 00:20:18,359 --> 00:20:21,000 Speaker 1: pet peeves and arguments for years and years and years. 332 00:20:21,040 --> 00:20:24,800 Speaker 1: And I'm sure I've hurt some mommy's feelings saying what 333 00:20:24,840 --> 00:20:27,479 Speaker 1: I'm saying, and maybe some daddy's feelings too, But for 334 00:20:27,520 --> 00:20:30,879 Speaker 1: gosh sakes, let your kids be free, let them roam, 335 00:20:31,000 --> 00:20:34,840 Speaker 1: let them learn, let them develop, and trust that you've 336 00:20:34,840 --> 00:20:37,479 Speaker 1: done a good, good enough job, given them the proper 337 00:20:37,520 --> 00:20:42,760 Speaker 1: morals and foundations that when they're faced with a big issue, 338 00:20:42,960 --> 00:20:47,320 Speaker 1: they'll cheers right. And if they don't, well, they'll learn 339 00:20:47,400 --> 00:20:50,960 Speaker 1: from that too. Let them roam, let them be free. Great, 340 00:20:51,480 --> 00:20:53,320 Speaker 1: great article. 341 00:20:53,680 --> 00:20:54,440 Speaker 2: I didn't write it, but. 342 00:20:54,480 --> 00:20:57,199 Speaker 1: Thanks no, well, thanks for finding it, thanks sharing it. 343 00:20:57,280 --> 00:21:01,760 Speaker 1: So that's it. Shop Talk numbers seventy seven. Quit being 344 00:21:01,800 --> 00:21:05,640 Speaker 1: a helicopter parent, recognize where the real danger is. Kick 345 00:21:05,680 --> 00:21:07,320 Speaker 1: your kids out of the house and let them go 346 00:21:07,400 --> 00:21:09,919 Speaker 1: have fun outside and understand that a little bit of 347 00:21:09,920 --> 00:21:12,760 Speaker 1: free time is really what they're longing for. And if 348 00:21:12,800 --> 00:21:15,959 Speaker 1: you're tired of all the time they're spending on screens, 349 00:21:17,240 --> 00:21:20,840 Speaker 1: listen to what they tell us. It's not that that's 350 00:21:20,880 --> 00:21:23,199 Speaker 1: the primary thing they want to do. It's just filling 351 00:21:23,240 --> 00:21:25,440 Speaker 1: the void for the things that they really long for, 352 00:21:25,520 --> 00:21:28,280 Speaker 1: which is face to face interaction and free play time 353 00:21:28,640 --> 00:21:32,040 Speaker 1: with friends. Give them that and you'll see your screen 354 00:21:32,080 --> 00:21:35,919 Speaker 1: time decrease, and you also see your child develop in 355 00:21:35,960 --> 00:21:39,520 Speaker 1: a better way than what maybe you've experienced so far. 356 00:21:39,720 --> 00:21:42,280 Speaker 1: So that's it. If you like this shop Talk, please 357 00:21:42,400 --> 00:21:44,600 Speaker 1: rate it, review it, share it with friends on social. 358 00:21:45,119 --> 00:21:47,879 Speaker 1: If you have an idea for shop Talk in the future, 359 00:21:47,920 --> 00:21:50,439 Speaker 1: you can write me anytime at Bill at normal folks 360 00:21:50,440 --> 00:21:53,040 Speaker 1: dot us. You can write me there as well if 361 00:21:53,040 --> 00:21:55,840 Speaker 1: you have ideas for guests for an Army and Normal Folks. 362 00:21:55,880 --> 00:21:59,920 Speaker 1: If you write me there, I will respond Please join what. 363 00:22:00,200 --> 00:22:01,840 Speaker 2: Join the Army at normal folks dot us. 364 00:22:01,960 --> 00:22:05,120 Speaker 1: Yeah, that's it. That's shop Talk number seventy seven. Thanks 365 00:22:05,160 --> 00:22:08,720 Speaker 1: for joining us. We'll see you next week.