Speaker 1: Hey, folks, it's Lyle. Before we get into the episode,
Speaker 1: I wanted to let you know that tickets are on
Speaker 1: sale now for Therapy Gecko live in over forty cities
Speaker 1: across the United States, Europe, and Canada, and you can
Speaker 1: get them at therapy geckotour dot com before they sell out.
Speaker 1: These shows will involve bringing folks from the audience up
Speaker 1: on stage to talk to a Gecko about whatever they want,
Speaker 1: just like we do in this podcast. The shows are
Speaker 1: completely unplanned, they are completely unpredictable, and they will be
Speaker 1: a lot of fun. So I hope to see you there.
Speaker 1: Tickets at therapy geckotour dot com. All right, one last thing,
Speaker 1: This is a really special episode. Man. My guest for
Speaker 1: today is Tim Heidecker, who is a comedian that's been
Speaker 1: a huge influence on me since I ever started making
Speaker 1: stuff on the internet, all the way back to when
Speaker 1: I was thirteen. You know, He's hugely responsible for my
Speaker 1: comedy sensibilities and the sensibilities of a lot of people
Speaker 1: out there making stuff. And it was a real honor
Speaker 1: and a weird full circle moment to have him on
Speaker 1: this podcast. If you haven't already seen his shows, go
Speaker 1: check out Tim and Eric awesome show, great job, or
Speaker 1: Tim and Eric's bedtime stories right now on HBO Max,
Speaker 1: or just go to YouTube and search Tim and Eric
Speaker 1: and just start watching whatever videos come up. And if
Speaker 1: you have seen all of that stuff, then you will
Speaker 1: really enjoy this episode. So let's get into it. Tim Heidecker, Hi,
Speaker 1: what's been the most persistent thought on your mind lately?
Speaker 2: What's been the most persistent thought on my mind lately?
Speaker 2: How I don't have that?
Speaker 1: Well, you don't have a consistent you don't have like
Speaker 1: a rering pattern A.
Speaker 2: Few I'm trying to be honest with you.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I don't.
Speaker 2: It's uh, it would be what am I? What am
Speaker 2: I not doing to?
Speaker 1: Uh?
Speaker 2: What could I be doing better? What don't? What am
Speaker 2: I doing? What aren't I doing enough? How can I make?
Speaker 2: How can I grow what I'm doing? I guess I
Speaker 2: guess that. That is usually like the and then there's
Speaker 2: certain projects where we do the on Cinema Oscar special
Speaker 2: every year and that's about a month out from happening
Speaker 2: a little more little more than a month. So most
Speaker 2: of my nights before I go to bed are thinking
Speaker 2: about that, stressing about that, because it's an incredibly uh complicated,
Speaker 2: difficult thing to pull off. It's a three hour live
Speaker 2: movie basically the show with a lot of moving parts,
Speaker 2: and so I worry about it. I think about it.
Speaker 2: I make you know blast you know I've I find
Speaker 2: lately for some reason, I will have nothing all day
Speaker 2: and if you ever have this, I'll have nothing, no
Speaker 2: breakthroughs all day. And then rights, I'm about to go
Speaker 2: to sleep, and everything just rushes, it comes in and
Speaker 2: some of it is some of it's positive, some of
Speaker 2: it is ideas that I can use. So I but
Speaker 2: I want to go to sleep too, So I have
Speaker 2: to Yeah, I have to make the decision. Should I
Speaker 2: is that good enough that I'm going to remember it?
Speaker 2: Or can I?
Speaker 3: Uh?
Speaker 2: Should I get up and make a couple of quick notes.
Speaker 1: But at this point, when you've done so many projects
Speaker 1: and you're you've gone through those stressful times so many times,
Speaker 1: does it does it get.
Speaker 2: Easier or no, it only gets harder.
Speaker 1: How does it get harder?
Speaker 2: Well, there's some things about that get easier because you
Speaker 2: learn about what works and what doesn't work, and you
Speaker 2: develop patterns and relationships that you can trust.
Speaker 1: But you you.
Speaker 2: You some you know, you burned through the what I
Speaker 2: think is maybe a limited reservoir of creativity. Sure that
Speaker 2: and and and the world changes. You've done a lot
Speaker 2: of things are the things that you now can't do
Speaker 2: because you've done them already. So your struggle is how
Speaker 2: to maintain something that started very small, that might have
Speaker 2: started very organically, very inspirationally, from nothing, and then you
Speaker 2: got to, uh, this is now you know your life,
Speaker 2: so you want it to continue and be great and
Speaker 2: get better or or stop doing it? Is an option too,
Speaker 2: what is something else? But yeah, we're not. I'm not
Speaker 2: at that place. I'm just so I don't think. I
Speaker 2: think it's hard to say it gets easier.
Speaker 1: What's compelling you to still do stuff? Is it? Do
Speaker 1: you like was there at one point where it was
Speaker 1: because you had something to prove? Or is it is
Speaker 1: it always just been just because you like it?
Speaker 2: Well, it's generally a lot of fun, and it's generally
Speaker 2: a lot of it's a good use of time and
Speaker 2: the people. It's always it's almost everything I do is
Speaker 2: fairly collaborative, so there's always a partner involved. There's other
Speaker 2: people involved that I enjoy being with, enjoy and you know,
Speaker 2: I don't have hobbies. I don't collect, you know, I don't.
Speaker 2: I don't do things that I don't know how else
Speaker 2: i'd spend my time.
Speaker 1: Would you consider music a hobby?
Speaker 2: No, I don't consider it a hobby.
Speaker 1: Uh.
Speaker 2: It's another outlet for my creativity.
Speaker 1: Okay, what would you consider you don't have any hobbies? Uh?
Speaker 4: No.
Speaker 2: I generally lie inert in my bed and then work.
Speaker 2: And then you know, I have two young kids. Yeah,
Speaker 2: so I spend a lot of time with them obviously,
Speaker 2: play games and take them to various things and do
Speaker 2: activities with them. So uh, that consumes a lot of
Speaker 2: my time. And then I'll like watch TV at night
Speaker 2: or watch a movie or something.
Speaker 1: If you died tomorrow, would you be would you be
Speaker 1: like we did it? Or would you be like, nah,
Speaker 1: we had more things we didn't get.
Speaker 2: To Oh, completely unsatisfied.
Speaker 1: Completely unsatisfyleately Yeah, uh.
Speaker 2: No, I mean I'm there's certain certainly a tremendous amount
Speaker 2: of things that I've done and made and that I'm
Speaker 2: very proud of. So I take that back. I would
Speaker 2: be there's certain things I'm very proud of. But I
Speaker 2: always think that I you know, I think everybody thinks
Speaker 2: they should be appreciated more than than they are. Do
Speaker 2: you feel by more people?
Speaker 1: Do you not? Do you not feel? Isn't that crazy?
Speaker 1: You could be appreciated by so many people and still
Speaker 1: not feel well.
Speaker 2: You know they're not They're not honoring me at the
Speaker 2: Mark Twain Prize.
Speaker 1: There.
Speaker 2: I haven't gotten any I've never won an award.
Speaker 1: What a ward would you most want to win?
Speaker 2: Oscar would be great, Oscar for Best Actor?
Speaker 1: But I but no, Somebody email the Oscars. Listen.
Speaker 2: I'm very I'm very happy. Uh, I'm not gonna I'm
Speaker 2: trying not to complain, but you're asking me very pointed
Speaker 2: questions that I appreciate.
Speaker 1: Do you think I'm trying to get you to complain?
Speaker 2: No, but you're I'm trying to be honest too, And
Speaker 2: I don't want to just I don't want to, you know,
Speaker 2: act like the celebrity on a on the Jimmy Fallon
Speaker 2: Show and tell you how how great everything is, because
Speaker 2: it's that's not I want to be as open and
Speaker 2: forthright with you as I possibly can.
Speaker 1: I appreciate that we're starting. We are, we live. I'm
Speaker 1: just ninety percent sure we're alive.
Speaker 2: But I do tend to I did this live stream
Speaker 2: for on Cinema the other night, a Q and a thing,
Speaker 2: and they're like, because it's still fun. And I sort
Speaker 2: of wrestled with this idea of fun and what fun
Speaker 2: is because I don't really and the truth is, yes,
Speaker 2: it is fun, but it's also it's not just fun.
Speaker 1: It's there's work.
Speaker 2: And there's pain involved and there's a struggle. So yeah,
Speaker 2: I think it's it's it's it should be.
Speaker 1: Uh.
Speaker 2: I hope it's helpful to know that, Like even if
Speaker 2: there's a perception that that you know, everything is light
Speaker 2: and and fund it. Yeah, for everybody, there's there can
Speaker 2: be a you know challenge there.
Speaker 1: Do you have things outside of work that give you pain? Uh?
Speaker 2: My back hurts, right, tell me about a very specific
Speaker 2: upper back thing going on where it's it only affects
Speaker 2: me when I on drive, when I drive, and uh
Speaker 2: so you know I do this a lot.
Speaker 1: God damn, it doesn't really help. Like that kind of
Speaker 1: made my back start to hurt a little bit by
Speaker 1: doing that. By doing that, we have different.
Speaker 2: Well I've hurt my back badly in a couple of
Speaker 2: different ways that are so stupid and embarrassing, Like by
Speaker 2: picking up you know, picking up a piece of luggage,
Speaker 2: like right as I'd gone on this big trip everywhere
Speaker 2: and doing all sorts of physical things, and then at
Speaker 2: the last step and the last step up up to
Speaker 2: my house, I went like this with my suitcase and
Speaker 2: it just it went.
Speaker 1: It's kind of scary to think that you can develop.
Speaker 1: There's so much bad things that can happen to you
Speaker 1: just by going normally through your day. You don't even
Speaker 1: have to be yeah.
Speaker 2: You know, and I feel this past few years feel like,
Speaker 2: you know, I'm turning forty seven on.
Speaker 1: Friday, Happy birthday.
Speaker 2: Yeah you, thank you, and I'm I'm I'm you know,
Speaker 2: I'm starting to like contend with mortality and my body
Speaker 2: kind of you know, shutting down on me eventually. And
Speaker 2: you know, it's these are new You're a young boy,
Speaker 2: so you're not You're not going to face these anytime soon.
Speaker 2: These these fears and these thoughts.
Speaker 1: I'm trying to keep them in mind, Like I know
Speaker 1: that I'm not going to live forever.
Speaker 2: And that is stunning. It's a stunning thing to start
Speaker 2: to contemplate as you get older, Like there's it's the
Speaker 2: inevitability of it.
Speaker 1: Are you afraid at all?
Speaker 5: Uh.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I've made a whole album called Fear of Death. Okay,
Speaker 2: I think it's it's a terrifying proposition to me be dead,
Speaker 2: to be dead, but it's like, you know what, not
Speaker 2: to be dead, but to die. That moment that is coming.
Speaker 2: It's coming, and it could be slow and painful. It
Speaker 2: could be quick. It could be pushed out of a
Speaker 2: I get pushed in front of a dump truck. That
Speaker 2: might be better. But that moment is in the future
Speaker 2: for you and me and everybody watching.
Speaker 1: I read something that resonated with me a lot. It
Speaker 1: was it said something like, uh, some philosophy to gladly
Speaker 1: pay the taxes of life, and so to die a slow,
Speaker 1: painful death is a tax on the joy that you
Speaker 1: have that you got to live at all. You know.
Speaker 2: Well, that's that's a nice way of thinking of it.
Speaker 2: I feel guilt for my that my children will have
Speaker 2: to deal with that situation my wife if if I
Speaker 2: outlive her, which I hope I which I hope she does.
Speaker 1: You hope you die first, or she does first, she
Speaker 1: dies as soon as possible. Good. No, I'm just kidding.
Speaker 6: No.
Speaker 2: Yeah, so, uh, but the being dead, I don't care
Speaker 2: about that. Because it'll like, there's a great line about you.
Speaker 2: There's a great line I think Roger Ebert said, yeah,
Speaker 2: which is, uh, I have no memory, I had no issues,
Speaker 2: uh before I was.
Speaker 1: Born and now he's dead. Yeah.
Speaker 2: And I'm assuming it's a very similar situation.
Speaker 1: Very similar situation. Well do you not are you religious?
Speaker 1: Set all? Do you know I was born?
Speaker 2: I always say, uh, I was born and raised Catholics,
Speaker 2: So of course I'm an agnostic.
Speaker 1: Okay, do you would you if you could, uh somehow
Speaker 1: drink a potion or trick yourself something into like that
Speaker 1: gives you the belief, would you do that? Or do
Speaker 1: you like you're where you're at your.
Speaker 2: Belief I just don't think it's I just don't think
Speaker 2: it's I think it's irrelevant to I don't see uh,
Speaker 2: I don't see what good it'll do you unless you
Speaker 2: truly believe that there's this eternal damnation awaiting you if
Speaker 2: you don't behave by certain rules that seem arbitrary a
Speaker 2: lot of the time. So I guess I'll take my
Speaker 2: chances at that not being true. It doesn't seem likely.
Speaker 1: It doesn't seem very like, but a lot more people
Speaker 1: than not believe it.
Speaker 2: I don't know that's true.
Speaker 1: There's there's God. There's more people that believe in God,
Speaker 1: just globally than not.
Speaker 2: I don't know, but I don't know. That could be true.
Speaker 2: But they might not have given it a lot of thought.
Speaker 1: But there's something to I'm like, there's something to that.
Speaker 1: There's something.
Speaker 2: Sit down. Probably, I would say, if you brought in
Speaker 2: one hundred people one by one, give me ten minutes
Speaker 2: with each of them.
Speaker 1: Afterlife.
Speaker 2: The odds are not great.
Speaker 1: How would you know?
Speaker 2: That's why I don't call myself an atheist. That's obnoxious,
Speaker 2: you know, I don't know.
Speaker 1: I don't know.
Speaker 2: It doesn't matter to me. Would they I can't be
Speaker 2: thinking about that stuff.
Speaker 1: Do you think they would leave that room with after
Speaker 1: you tell them that there is no afterlife? And you
Speaker 1: would they leave that room sadder or happy?
Speaker 2: I think they should walk away with a serenity that
Speaker 2: this is one thing I could take out of my
Speaker 2: life thinking about.
Speaker 1: Okay, how's being a father? Is that tough?
Speaker 2: Oh it's great? Yeah? No, I I the older they
Speaker 2: get the first few years or a lot of work
Speaker 2: and there's not a lot of return, you know. I mean,
Speaker 2: the babies are cute, and there's a lot of some
Speaker 2: babies are My kids were very cute, they're very good,
Speaker 2: but they don't you know, you can't hang out with them.
Speaker 1: You can kind of hang out with a baby. I mean,
Speaker 1: if you're when you're hanging out with the grown man,
Speaker 1: you sometimes it's just you guys sitting together watching TV,
Speaker 1: and you can do that with a baby.
Speaker 2: That's true. But they don't give much back. They give
Speaker 2: they give nothing back.
Speaker 1: You ever talk to someone who is not a great conversationalist,
Speaker 1: it's kind of similar.
Speaker 2: Yeah, there's a lot of people I could name right now,
Speaker 2: but no I but now they're like seven and nine
Speaker 2: and they are sorry, six and nine, and you know,
Speaker 2: you can start you can start talking to thought stuff
Speaker 2: they have. Yeah, the opinion that my daughter, who's the
Speaker 2: older one, she's it's like hanging out with a like
Speaker 2: a friend of mine a lot of the time. So
Speaker 2: I love them quite a bit. And you know, I've
Speaker 2: reached there's a point at the night in the night,
Speaker 2: it's around eight eight thirty with bedtime, when my wife
Speaker 2: and I are like goodbye, you know, like.
Speaker 1: Good night, and they're off in their own Yeah, we
Speaker 1: do not. I do not.
Speaker 2: I can't hang anymore.
Speaker 1: What do they do? Are they? Is it books? Is it?
Speaker 1: Do they have an iPad? What are they doing when
Speaker 1: they're not with you? Either you they have.
Speaker 2: They're on the iPad? They play roadblocks, okay, which was
Speaker 2: a great thing during the pandemic because they were able
Speaker 2: to socialize with their friends and and they watch movies
Speaker 2: and TV and read a lot. They read a lot
Speaker 2: of books. My daughter's a voracious reader. She reads at
Speaker 2: the breakfast table in the morning. And so they seem
Speaker 2: pretty well rounded.
Speaker 1: Are you optimist, like, are you optimistic about the future
Speaker 1: or are you what do you arrange on that the
Speaker 1: optimism pessimism spectrum.
Speaker 2: Uh, doesn't look great.
Speaker 1: Doesn't look great.
Speaker 2: It doesn't look great for now. I mean, I don't know.
Speaker 2: You can look. I'm listening to the great Dan Carlin
Speaker 2: history podcast, the hardcore History.
Speaker 1: It's called Terrific.
Speaker 2: It's not about that very long form.
Speaker 1: Sounds like a porn hardcore history.
Speaker 2: Well, he's talking to almost in this one about the
Speaker 2: fall of the Roman Empire and the rise of the
Speaker 2: the Vikings and the barbarians, you know, and you know,
Speaker 2: every civilization's collapse and people persist. Yeah, so it do
Speaker 2: you do look around, you go like, this is you know,
Speaker 2: like Lax. Today here in La power went out. I
Speaker 2: don't know that the whole airport lights went out, electricity
Speaker 2: went out for like an hour. It's not a good
Speaker 2: sign of a thriving civilization, you know. I mean it's
Speaker 2: a minor thing, but there's a million little ticks in that.
Speaker 1: But during the time when the power is out in Lax,
Speaker 1: there's still way more places in the world where the
Speaker 1: power is on. Absolutely pretty good. Yes, well it's pretty good.
Speaker 1: You know.
Speaker 2: That's interesting you bring that up because I'm driving over
Speaker 2: here and it was a long drive, yes, and it
Speaker 2: was traffic, and you look at the traffic and sometimes
Speaker 2: at you know, four o'clock, you look at the traffic
Speaker 2: and you think this isn't working. You know, this is broken.
Speaker 2: Everything's broken. But then you have another I had another thought,
Speaker 2: which was like, what's kind of amazing. There's all these
Speaker 2: people on the road and no one's driving into each other.
Speaker 2: You know, yeah, they very perfect. I mean like it's
Speaker 2: all it does kind of work. So you know, you
Speaker 2: could look at the news. You could say, well, I
Speaker 2: mean California in the West seems to be running.
Speaker 1: Out of water.
Speaker 2: Yeah, but they've been saying that for a long time,
Speaker 2: so you know, I don't know. I expect bad things.
Speaker 2: I always expect bad things to happen, but always expect.
Speaker 2: You have to be you have to be ready. Do
Speaker 2: you believe I was in New York on nine to eleven?
Speaker 2: You didn't think I knew that was coming?
Speaker 1: Do you? You always expect bad No?
Speaker 2: I think it's just the reality. If you look at history,
Speaker 2: there that that that that you know through history, there's
Speaker 2: just there's there's been a but we're doing you.
Speaker 1: Were talking about the barbarians and that we're doing way
Speaker 1: better than those. You take a ship and it goes
Speaker 1: to a magical place that you don't even know where
Speaker 1: it is. They had plumbing back then.
Speaker 2: Ours is probably better, though, absolutely there are there are,
Speaker 2: there are, of course. I don't want to go back
Speaker 2: to the I'm not I'm not saying I want to
Speaker 2: go back to live during the time of the Dark Ages,
Speaker 2: which is not appropriate term, by the way, I learned.
Speaker 1: You don't call you the dark dark Ages? Why did?
Speaker 1: Why is that not? Well?
Speaker 2: Because it discounts a lot of positivity, positive things that
Speaker 2: were happening during that time.
Speaker 1: Okay, I guess, yeah, okay, it wasn't all bad, just
Speaker 1: like now. Yeah, So I'm not sure what the question
Speaker 1: do I am I positive about the Are you positive?
Speaker 1: Aout the feet? It sounds what you said that you
Speaker 1: always look at waiting for bad things to happen. So
Speaker 1: I was like, you're not, No, but I don't. It
Speaker 1: doesn't consume me, you know, I don't. I don't.
Speaker 2: I still, you know, live my life and hope for
Speaker 2: the best and try to do things and try to
Speaker 2: you know, and have fun. But I'm just being honest.
Speaker 2: You can't look at you can't just have a rosy
Speaker 2: rose colored glasses perspective on the world.
Speaker 1: Is this so this is why would you this philosophy? Philosophy?
Speaker 1: Are you like? Do you want your kids to be
Speaker 1: like as cautious as you are?
Speaker 2: They should be pragmatic and skeptical of the world around them.
Speaker 2: And my dad taught me that a little healthy dose
Speaker 2: of skeptics.
Speaker 1: Kind of like a expect the worst, hope for the best.
Speaker 2: Absolutely, that's a great way to look.
Speaker 1: I think, hey, do you want to take a phone call?
Speaker 1: We have to. That's why I came in.
Speaker 2: I should also say, before I know this is a.
Speaker 2: I know this is a the therapy therapy, therapy show,
Speaker 2: therapy show. I am a scientologist, and we don't believe
Speaker 2: in in psychology psychiatry. We find that that's not helpful.
Speaker 1: People are calling in specifically desiring advice from you through
Speaker 1: a scientology lens. Yeah, it works out very well.
Speaker 2: This is a pretty good you know. This is where
Speaker 2: sometimes ideas come from, and the audience now can be
Speaker 2: the witness to a new one, which is I'm going
Speaker 2: to self identify as a scientologist.
Speaker 1: Do you want to take one the is serious?
Speaker 2: Yeah or whatever, I don't, don't ask me, just bring him,
Speaker 2: bring him our way. I'll take it all.
Speaker 1: Hello. Hello Adrian, Hi Adrian, you're on the phone with
Speaker 1: Lyle and Tim? Or what's going on?
Speaker 2: Baby?
Speaker 1: How can we get you a name?
Speaker 7: I I'm just gonna say that I love you so much,
Speaker 7: mister Tim. I've heard that you're a comedian and a
Speaker 7: very cool I love comedy. But I just wanted to
Speaker 7: talk about family stuff.
Speaker 8: I guess.
Speaker 1: What kind of family stuff you call and talk about, Adrian.
Speaker 7: I don't feel I might be wrong, but I don't
Speaker 7: feel like my family loves me as a son. They
Speaker 7: just love me when they need stuff from me. I
Speaker 7: constantly feel like I'm a slave, that they don't appreciate
Speaker 7: the things I do for them, and whenever I try
Speaker 7: to bring it up to them that they make me
Speaker 7: feel a certain way, that they just treat me like
Speaker 7: I'm a disrespectful guy. I don't want to say kids
Speaker 7: because I'm like twenty, But.
Speaker 2: Can I do you have a good circle of friends?
Speaker 9: I do.
Speaker 7: I have a decent circle of friends. I'm trying to
Speaker 7: go through college with some of them. I have an
Speaker 7: amazing girlfriend that helps me through this.
Speaker 2: Guess what, But that's your family. That's your family's family. Yeah.
Speaker 2: I mean, if you want to bring if you have
Speaker 2: something else to say. But I find this a lot,
Speaker 2: a lot that you can only expect so much of
Speaker 2: your blood relatives. Sometimes it's going to be. It has
Speaker 2: to be, nat, you have to be. It has to be.
Speaker 2: It's not always gonna work. Yeah, And just because they're
Speaker 2: your family doesn't mean that it has to work. It'd
Speaker 2: be nice if it does. It makes things easier, But
Speaker 2: sometimes it's just not healthy to have that close up
Speaker 2: relationship with your family just because they're your family. And
Speaker 2: if you can find that love and find that support
Speaker 2: amongst friends and you know other people in your life.
Speaker 2: You know, don't obsess over getting it from your immediate
Speaker 2: family because it may never happen.
Speaker 1: Mm hmmmm.
Speaker 2: But that's my two cents. Please continue.
Speaker 1: Well, yeah, I mean it's it's tough, right because I've
Speaker 1: talked to people about this stuff on here before. It's
Speaker 1: very tough when there's an issue like this that's so like,
Speaker 1: you know, sad, a person struggling with like stuff going
Speaker 1: on with their family. But there's only you. If you
Speaker 1: can't force somebody to give you something in a relationship,
Speaker 1: to love you or to act a certain way to
Speaker 1: you can like express that you're feeling, you can do
Speaker 1: I love that. And then at the end of the
Speaker 1: day that's all you can do, and that sucks. But
Speaker 1: it is a great beautiful thing to hear that you
Speaker 1: have friends that you can kind of like lean more
Speaker 1: into those those relationships to find the love that you
Speaker 1: feel like you're not finding from your family. What do
Speaker 1: you feel about all of this.
Speaker 7: Adrian, I think there's all very good points. I think, honestly,
Speaker 7: like the only issues that I still live with my
Speaker 7: parents because of college ain't cheap man, and I would
Speaker 7: I mean, I'm not looking for like a way to
Speaker 7: tell them that I'm leaving moving out. I'm just uh,
Speaker 7: I completely understand there's there's.
Speaker 2: Still an actual dependency there, right right right?
Speaker 1: Yea, do you work at all outside of school?
Speaker 9: Yeah?
Speaker 7: I work at Taco Bell.
Speaker 2: Okay, well how much does it how much does this
Speaker 2: fracture or how much does this? Uh like, what's an
Speaker 2: example of how this is affecting you in practical terms.
Speaker 9: I just.
Speaker 7: Like my my parents, mainly my dad. He's kind of
Speaker 7: cold like with his emotions, but he only treats me
Speaker 7: nice whenever he wants something from me, and then he'll
Speaker 7: guilt trip me about it. And I'm like, well, I
Speaker 7: mean you you do all I do all this for you,
Speaker 7: and and you make all these faces whenever I ask
Speaker 7: you to do something. But I mean I never ask
Speaker 7: anything with them. I like, it's it's a little weird,
Speaker 7: like that's.
Speaker 10: A rough thing.
Speaker 1: That's a rough thing, Like a parent looking at their
Speaker 1: child is like like, like, you need to pay a debt.
Speaker 1: You have a debt. You need to pay it to
Speaker 1: me just for the fact that I raise right, Yeah.
Speaker 7: Yeah, it's like that, like like I I'm not saying
Speaker 7: that I want anything from when I do stuff for them,
Speaker 7: but like they say that, like you do this out
Speaker 7: of like the kindness of your heart, and we still
Speaker 7: give you stuff. But they pay for my gas. But
Speaker 7: I never get to see that gas because it's being
Speaker 7: used to run ends for them.
Speaker 2: You know, well, you know, I also say this like
Speaker 2: I think being a teenager in early twenties, it's a
Speaker 2: tough period of time. It's a transitionary period of time,
Speaker 2: transitional period of time, and you will probably grow out
Speaker 2: of this situation soon as you get out of school
Speaker 2: and make a life for yourself, and you know your
Speaker 2: relationship with your family might change because of that.
Speaker 1: This is it.
Speaker 2: It's in a real tricky spot right now. But maybe
Speaker 2: it just kind of got to keep your head down
Speaker 2: and and see and try not to, you know, let
Speaker 2: it get to you and know that it's about them,
Speaker 2: not you, and only you know you could be honest
Speaker 2: with them, but don't let it. Don't let it like
Speaker 2: you know, obsessed, don't become obsessive about it.
Speaker 1: And in the meantime, plan lots of playdates with the friends.
Speaker 1: You know, this is a good point. I feel like
Speaker 1: spending some time with your friends. There's always a good idea.
Speaker 2: I love my friends and some of them I treat
Speaker 2: I consider family, you know, we consider each other's family
Speaker 2: because I don't know family. I'm not very close with them,
Speaker 2: you know, because there's any acrimony there. It's just we
Speaker 2: don't really get along.
Speaker 1: Adrian, is there anything else you want to say to
Speaker 1: the people that compet there before we go?
Speaker 7: Uh? I love the get I'm gonna start watching more
Speaker 7: things for you, Tim, and thank you for listening. I'll
Speaker 7: have a probably great night.
Speaker 1: Hey, thank you, Adrian.
Speaker 2: All the best to you.
Speaker 1: Who's your best friend?
Speaker 2: I don't think about in those terms. I think there's
Speaker 2: a lot. There's different friends for different situations in my life. Obviously,
Speaker 2: Eric and I are very close each other for twenty years.
Speaker 2: Greg Turkington, who I've worked with a lot, my producer
Speaker 2: on office hours, Matt very close with.
Speaker 1: Very and your first cousin are hanging off of a cliff.
Speaker 1: You can only save one. Who are we going with? Well? Eric?
Speaker 2: I mean it just makes business sense.
Speaker 1: Sure, you know, right, because it's not really bringing in anything. Yeah, hello,
Speaker 1: I may, I'm here with Tim. We're being geckos. How
Speaker 1: you doing?
Speaker 7: Oh?
Speaker 11: My God, I'm just so good.
Speaker 1: Are you good? Guys? I don't want to answer it
Speaker 1: for you? Is it talking to you? I think she's
Speaker 1: talking to both of us? No, May, May, How can
Speaker 1: we get you today? What's going on?
Speaker 11: Oh my gosh, I just have to start first by saying, Lyle,
Speaker 11: I have listened to you since the COVID lockdown and
Speaker 11: the only first I've ever talked to you, and.
Speaker 12: Oh my god, I love you.
Speaker 1: Love you too? Man. Oh but anyways, could you say
Speaker 1: something nice about Tim too? Because the other caller didn't
Speaker 1: say anything nice about Tim and it's making you know what, Tim.
Speaker 11: I think you are so freaking cool for being here.
Speaker 11: Like the fact that you're cool enough to be associated
Speaker 11: with Lyle means that you're like an aless celebrity for me.
Speaker 1: Great. How can we help you today, babe?
Speaker 10: Dude?
Speaker 11: So, I'm I'm living in Salt Lake City right now.
Speaker 11: I'm from Seattle, and I'm going to graduate college and
Speaker 11: I've had literally so much fun with it. But I'm
Speaker 11: a little nervous about making money off the that, you know,
Speaker 11: and so I've been thinking about moving to Colorado and
Speaker 11: opening up, like I want to get a space that
Speaker 11: is like a half dispensary, half gym, because that disso
Speaker 11: isn't like part of my major, but the gym is
Speaker 11: part of my major, so I'd still be using my education,
Speaker 11: you know, but also like guaranteed i'd be making some money.
Speaker 1: You want to open a half dispensary half gym. Everyone's
Speaker 1: body is different and responds differently to things. But I,
Speaker 1: when I get stoned, exercises the last thing. Yeah, I
Speaker 1: think of.
Speaker 2: I generally fall asleep, but there might be something there.
Speaker 2: I think if you do it in a very curated
Speaker 2: Uh what do you what would would be the word
Speaker 2: the artisan kind of of you know, like not a
Speaker 2: lot of equipment. It's like very or it's very kind
Speaker 2: of yoga e some some maybe bar like what's that
Speaker 2: called bar? With the with the bar, it's like dance,
Speaker 2: It's like ballet a car you got it? Yeah, the bar.
Speaker 11: There's zoomba, there's pilates, Like, well.
Speaker 2: Zoomba is a little outdated.
Speaker 1: What what what is? What do you do?
Speaker 2: Zooma is like very nineties. Maybe Zoomba's coming back though
Speaker 2: Zooma's nineties.
Speaker 1: I feel like a zoomba, Uh you could do a
Speaker 1: wee zany zoomba, We smoke weed, We get a little zany,
Speaker 1: but go a little crazy, do a little zoomba. I
Speaker 1: like that.
Speaker 2: I like getting a little high.
Speaker 11: And then snoop dog.
Speaker 2: Or you could play some like a fish or Grateful Dead.
Speaker 1: Or something by the way, you know, And with the
Speaker 1: financial thing, I don't know the numbers on this, but
Speaker 1: would starting a business be significantly more expensive than college?
Speaker 11: You know, probably that or it would equal out because
Speaker 11: I'm about to leave call into a fifty k in debt,
Speaker 11: and so to even have like I feel like an
Speaker 11: idea or get legality of business going, it'd be around
Speaker 11: fifty k.
Speaker 1: So, oh yeah, it.
Speaker 2: Sounds like you got some startup costs there.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, where do you begin?
Speaker 2: You've got to like find a partner and stuff. You
Speaker 2: got to get somebody that that's been that's in the game, right.
Speaker 11: Yeah, dude, I gotta find a realtor somebody who can
Speaker 11: find me a space because first I'll definitely open up
Speaker 11: the gym because I can just get that going and
Speaker 11: then hopefully at patch on this dispo later.
Speaker 2: But dude, take out all the cliff bars and put
Speaker 2: in tens of.
Speaker 1: Gummies medicated weed. Cliff bars yeah.
Speaker 7: Oh my god, that would be awesome.
Speaker 1: Cliff here right now, may are you high right now?
Speaker 11: You know I'm not joking. The reason it took me
Speaker 11: a second to pick up the phone was because I
Speaker 11: had you on you and I might have exhaled out
Speaker 11: of my water pipe.
Speaker 1: Huh Okay in this moment, do you feel like exercising?
Speaker 11: You know, I feel like a million dollars because I'm
Speaker 11: talking to you. But honestly, when I get done, I
Speaker 11: love to work out. I love it. It feels so good.
Speaker 11: I can connect with the movement and muscle.
Speaker 9: It's awesome.
Speaker 2: Yeah, because you're inspiring me to try working out stoned
Speaker 2: because I've never tried it, and I don't enjoy working out.
Speaker 2: I find it tedious and like it's always a it's
Speaker 2: like I just got to do it, and I go
Speaker 2: through it and it's boring. But if I was a
Speaker 2: little high, it might be fun.
Speaker 11: If you just like, you don't even like counting and
Speaker 11: stuff is so much easier and you don't even like.
Speaker 1: Realize I feel like counting would be fine. One, four, eight.
Speaker 12: Well exactly.
Speaker 11: That's the fun of it because eventually you get to
Speaker 11: eight and you're.
Speaker 13: Like, yeah, I did it yay. I don't know how
Speaker 13: I got here, but I did it.
Speaker 1: I'm sold on the side.
Speaker 2: My next workout is is on Friday morning, and I
Speaker 2: will attempt this and let you.
Speaker 1: Know, may anything else you want to say to the
Speaker 1: people with the computer before.
Speaker 11: We go, I just want to say, everybody drops some
Speaker 11: love for Lyle ever two and everybody have a great eye.
Speaker 1: Thank you. May have a good one you too. Bow.
Speaker 1: Do you get high often?
Speaker 4: No?
Speaker 2: But I do take a I take a gummy at
Speaker 2: night that puts me to bed.
Speaker 1: It hits me every night. Yeah.
Speaker 2: I got five, like a five milligram or whatever, like
Speaker 2: very light, and it just keeps me, keeps me down.
Speaker 1: I got to be put down like.
Speaker 2: A horse every night. It's all my ideas, you know.
Speaker 1: But right right, and then then the flushing of creative
Speaker 1: ideas and you're suppressing them with the weed gumming.
Speaker 2: Yeah, but I don't generally, I don't and I don't.
Speaker 2: I don't get I don't uh use weed uh socially
Speaker 2: very often every once in a while, but very very rarely.
Speaker 2: I just started kind of getting very very very in
Speaker 2: small doses, very a couple of times a year into
Speaker 2: mushrooms though, and I really do like that, like a
Speaker 2: little like I did this over the summer. I just
Speaker 2: took a tiny bit.
Speaker 1: What's a tiny bit like some like a micro like
Speaker 1: half a stem or something half a stem? Okay, not
Speaker 1: even like what did I do? What to do for you?
Speaker 2: It's just a beautiful, wonderful few hours happy, a little
Speaker 2: little loopy, a little you know.
Speaker 1: And is that was it your first time?
Speaker 2: No, I did it. I've done it over off and
Speaker 2: on for years. I did it in high school a lot.
Speaker 2: Psychedelics a lot, not a lot, but you know, there's
Speaker 2: like a summer of doing acid.
Speaker 1: And stuff and did you?
Speaker 2: And then I had a bad experience and I wasn't.
Speaker 2: I stayed away for a year twenty years or so.
Speaker 1: Can I ask what the bad experience was?
Speaker 2: Yeah, well, I've now analyzed it, and I've determined that
Speaker 2: it really probably wasn't the acid. It was probably I
Speaker 2: was at the Lollapalooza nineteen ninety four and you had
Speaker 2: the Smashing Pumpkins there, and you had the Beastie Boys,
Speaker 2: and the Beastie Boys came out and we were way
Speaker 2: in the back and had been tripping all day, and
Speaker 2: the energy shifted as you can imagine. When the Beastie
Speaker 2: Boys came out, this is like ill Communication era. Does
Speaker 2: that mean anything to you? Check your head ill Communication.
Speaker 1: I'll look it up like they were. I mean they
Speaker 1: were headlining. This is hot. I know that what was
Speaker 1: was the other band you said was beast of Boys
Speaker 1: and Smashing Pumpkins. Okay, no, I mean they have similar
Speaker 1: like hardcore.
Speaker 2: Yeah, but it's a little prettier, a little dreamier psychedelic,
Speaker 2: so it kind of worked. But hm, Anyway, I took
Speaker 2: a hit from a joint from a stranger.
Speaker 1: And I had.
Speaker 2: A full disassociative, you know, panic attack that stayed with
Speaker 2: me for hours, even the next day. It was kind
Speaker 2: of tingling in me and and I just assumed it
Speaker 2: was this reaction it was the acid. But there's a
Speaker 2: good chance the dude gave me, you know something, something
Speaker 2: some angel duster. I don't know what, you know, PCP,
Speaker 2: I mean, who knows? So, uh, it's still very you know.
Speaker 2: I don't encourage it's it's a it's a dangerous sport
Speaker 2: any drugs. I don't encourage anybody. If you do it,
Speaker 2: do it with sup, you know, with somebody I don't know.
Speaker 1: Do it supervision.
Speaker 2: No, but but I find that a tiny little bit
Speaker 2: of mushrooms can be can be something you can control.
Speaker 2: And there are no decide effects that I found. I
Speaker 2: don't feel bad the next day, and you know, and
Speaker 2: and it doesn't last a long time. Very nice. I
Speaker 2: think there's going to be more, you know, it's gonna
Speaker 2: become a little more.
Speaker 9: Yeah.
Speaker 1: When you were in high school, do you can you
Speaker 1: and you were kind of doing more acid and stuff.
Speaker 1: Can you recall any epiphanies?
Speaker 2: No, but I can recall the brand of acid were
Speaker 2: a little Beavis and butt Head tabs.
Speaker 1: That sounds safe.
Speaker 2: Yeah, No, I mean that kind of what I was
Speaker 2: getting in Allentown, Pennsylvania. The drugs I was getting in
Speaker 2: Allentown must have been the worst stuff, you know, it
Speaker 2: just must have been the not the primo good stuff.
Speaker 2: But epiphanies, Yeah, I mean what you learn about life. Sure,
Speaker 2: I think a lot of my as I was talking
Speaker 2: earlier about my skepticism of of higher power, I think
Speaker 2: some of that.
Speaker 1: Creeping in with the acid a little bit. I think so,
Speaker 1: I think. So, see what's going on in the queue? Hello, Hello, Ryan.
Speaker 1: It says here that you want to talk about the
Speaker 1: time that you put your energy into a coin and
Speaker 1: sent it through space.
Speaker 14: Okay, so I got that's I did that maybe.
Speaker 3: Two three days ago.
Speaker 15: I wanted to I put a coin in a box,
Speaker 15: put my energy in trying to send it through space
Speaker 15: time and I did it a couple of days ago,
Speaker 15: and I wanted to. I haven't moved the box yet,
Speaker 15: so I wanted to pick it up live on the
Speaker 15: phone with you guys. But I I just started watching.
Speaker 14: Sorry, what was it?
Speaker 1: Nothing?
Speaker 15: Go ahead, please, I'm a huge fan of you, Tim,
Speaker 15: I'm I'm a huge fan. I'm so excited.
Speaker 2: Finally, Jesus, it took two. It took three calls, we
Speaker 2: got one.
Speaker 1: We were one.
Speaker 2: Thank you. Of course it's the guy that put a
Speaker 2: coin in a box that was sending up your time
Speaker 2: in space.
Speaker 15: Obviously. Yeah, I mean, what other sort of person would
Speaker 15: be that late watching watching your shows?
Speaker 16: Man?
Speaker 15: You you really you You're one of the best, you know, producer, writer,
Speaker 15: actors of all time. You know, thank you. I'm so excited.
Speaker 15: I I you know, I want to just take a
Speaker 15: moment to appreciate the fact that I can call a
Speaker 15: get go and and talk to one of the best writers.
Speaker 2: And I love that because I appreciate and I love
Speaker 2: doing it. I love that there's this big old world
Speaker 2: out there that we can through technology, we can all
Speaker 2: kind of get into the same room together. And I
Speaker 2: wish we could do it more often because I think
Speaker 2: it's a very healthy thing.
Speaker 1: I agree. I feel like we're all kind of in
Speaker 1: the room together.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: Now, you sent a coin through space.
Speaker 15: So I wanted to. I didn't just want to send
Speaker 15: a coin through space time. I wanted the universe to
Speaker 15: I wanted to help somebody, so I I The energy
Speaker 15: that I put into the coin was to attempts to
Speaker 15: try to get the coin to appear to whoever might
Speaker 15: need it at the time, and appear of the currency
Speaker 15: of the time as well, and just be a coin
Speaker 15: endlessly traveling through space and time for whoever might need it.
Speaker 2: Okay, did it work?
Speaker 15: So I'll pick up the box right now. I did
Speaker 15: it three days ago.
Speaker 14: It did not. It did not.
Speaker 1: What does it look like?
Speaker 2: Yeah, how do you know that it worked?
Speaker 1: Before?
Speaker 15: I never have tried any thing remotely close to this
Speaker 15: until maybe three days ago.
Speaker 1: Okay, here's what I have even thought about this. So
Speaker 1: you're sending a coin into space to travel through time
Speaker 1: so that the coin can help whoever needs it, whether
Speaker 1: the coin finds itself in the future or in the past.
Speaker 1: Is that accurate? Yes? Okay, So how are you if
Speaker 1: you're sending a coin, how are you sure that the
Speaker 1: coin will I mean, you could probably go look at
Speaker 1: historical data and see what kind of currency they were
Speaker 1: took in the sixteen hundred's, but if in the future,
Speaker 1: you don't know what they're going to be bartering way true, that.
Speaker 15: Was so when I say I put energy into it,
Speaker 15: you know, you to do something like that, you need
Speaker 15: the right words and the right you know, thought process.
Speaker 15: So like, you know, what I wanted to happen was
Speaker 15: in if it was the future or the past, the
Speaker 15: coin would morph into whatever currency of the of the
Speaker 15: time period to whoever might be in neither. It was
Speaker 15: for somebody in need.
Speaker 2: That's fair and it's it's generous. What did it look
Speaker 2: like when it worked? What was that experience? Could walk
Speaker 2: us through? Just tell us what happened when it When
Speaker 2: you said you claimed that it.
Speaker 15: Worked, so it's no, I know it's never worked.
Speaker 3: I've never tried anything.
Speaker 1: You said that. I also thought hearing you say it worked.
Speaker 15: What about apologize for the misunderstanding.
Speaker 2: Okay, you're you retract that. That's fair, that's an honest
Speaker 2: you're a ask well, uh, why would you think it
Speaker 2: would work?
Speaker 1: So?
Speaker 3: Okay, Yeah, I believe that everybody is God, everything in
Speaker 3: the universe as well, not just people, so we all
Speaker 3: things have the ability to travel through space time.
Speaker 2: Okay, I remember into.
Speaker 1: What would you tell him?
Speaker 2: Well, what did I tell him?
Speaker 1: Yeah?
Speaker 2: I mean how old are you?
Speaker 15: Twenty seven?
Speaker 2: Okay? And uh are you on uh medication?
Speaker 15: How do you define nothing like? Not?
Speaker 1: No?
Speaker 2: For I smoke marijuana, no psychoactive medication. Oh I takes yeah, okay,
Speaker 2: but no like prescribed pharmaceutical.
Speaker 1: Uh no, that's.
Speaker 2: Okay.
Speaker 1: Is there anything else you want to say to the
Speaker 1: people of the computer before we go?
Speaker 2: Yeah, well, well let me just let me say I
Speaker 2: think you could take Can I say one thing? Ry,
Speaker 2: I think you could take your experiments here as perhaps
Speaker 2: uh maybe you can gather some information from that that
Speaker 2: perhaps you might have a a false theory on this concept.
Speaker 2: Maybe you've proved that you've done the good work of
Speaker 2: proving that this might not be the case.
Speaker 1: Try it with a dollar.
Speaker 15: Okay, all night, I will.
Speaker 2: All right, Ryan, thank you for coming. Yeah, thanks, thanks
Speaker 2: for the kind words, Ryan.
Speaker 13: Yeah, it was.
Speaker 2: Amazing talking with you all the best.
Speaker 1: Thank you Nice. I like him. I like him too.
Speaker 2: That means let's let m think outside the box.
Speaker 1: Who cares?
Speaker 2: Yeah, I was not sending guns around or anything like that.
Speaker 1: I don't think he's sending guns around if he was,
Speaker 1: Like I put a gun that I'm trying to send
Speaker 1: through space and time. I feel like a coin in
Speaker 1: any era is not going to help a lot. I'm
Speaker 1: being that's.
Speaker 2: True, though, that's true. This is one one coin isn't
Speaker 2: solving anybody's major life.
Speaker 1: Somebody's trying to get enough, like saved up for a
Speaker 1: stick of gum, and it could find them and help them.
Speaker 1: Which is that's any anything helps?
Speaker 2: Sure, maybe he could scale it up if it worked
Speaker 2: and then start sending big like a big sack of
Speaker 2: wheat to somebody in need or something.
Speaker 1: Is Is money important to you? Uh?
Speaker 2: Sure, yes, I think it's it's uh maintains a maintain
Speaker 2: a standard of living. Ah. I have children, of course,
Speaker 2: and I don't live extravagantly. I don't we We're pretty
Speaker 2: humble about most things.
Speaker 1: I don't have. I don't have a boat. Is there
Speaker 1: any like I couldn't imagine having a boat. Is there
Speaker 1: anything that you are like? I want a good one
Speaker 1: of this thing? Like anything that you are like, I
Speaker 1: if I'm I'm gonna spend good money on this thing
Speaker 1: because it's I feel like everyone has a thing like that.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean, I don't cheap, I don't. I I
Speaker 2: like good I like well made clothes sometimes that fit well,
Speaker 2: you know, and that you know, I don't disparage anybody
Speaker 2: for wearing cheaply made, cheap clothes, but like, yeah, like this,
Speaker 2: like this from Amazon. But you know, I don't dress,
Speaker 2: I don't fancy or anything, but I might, you know,
Speaker 2: scale up a little bit for for a nice cashmere
Speaker 2: sweater or something.
Speaker 1: I liked the coat you came in, the puffy coat.
Speaker 2: Yeah, the PATAGONI like. So I don't might spend a
Speaker 2: little money on wardrobe because I don't wear I'll also
Speaker 2: only wear.
Speaker 1: Like four things, you know what I mean.
Speaker 2: So like, like, I spend a lot of money, but
Speaker 2: I spend more money than maybe your average Joe on
Speaker 2: like a black or a white T shirt because it's
Speaker 2: the only thing I wear and I wanted to feel
Speaker 2: comfortable and last a long time, so I see value
Speaker 2: in spending a little more.
Speaker 1: On you know what I mean, how often do you
Speaker 1: do laundry?
Speaker 2: Well, I should say I have lots of you know,
Speaker 2: I have like, let's say, fifteen shirts.
Speaker 1: Okay, you have fifteen shirts.
Speaker 2: And we do laundry once a week. So I'm not
Speaker 2: I'm not. I shouldn't say.
Speaker 1: Say you have fifteen shirts and you do laundry once.
Speaker 1: Say you will always have. I always have more than
Speaker 1: I need. Okay, clothes smart, Yeah, I'll run out. I
Speaker 1: always wait until I run out. Actually I wait until
Speaker 1: a week after I run out.
Speaker 2: No, I've always wear clean clothes. What I mean is
Speaker 2: I have the same kind of general I'm like, you
Speaker 2: know Einstein or something where you just have the same outfit.
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, jeans or so Mark Zuckerberg does.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I's sort of I don't go that, but I
Speaker 2: have a general like day to day what you know,
Speaker 2: t shirt, pants, socks, underwear routine.
Speaker 1: I like the idea of sending stuff through space to
Speaker 1: help other people, but like a like a shirt could
Speaker 1: be good.
Speaker 2: Yeah, but I use people always need shoes.
Speaker 1: People always need shoes, So I think in the future, Well,
Speaker 1: we don't know what they're gonna need in the future,
Speaker 1: so sending that I would recommend for him. I think
Speaker 1: you should send stuff into the past because we kind
Speaker 1: of know what they needed. Then study the past. But
Speaker 1: in the future you have no idea.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I I don't want to think about that anymore.
Speaker 1: Let's take a call. Hello, Hi, how are you?
Speaker 3: I'm good? How about you, Tim?
Speaker 1: How are you good? Aiden?
Speaker 9: Yeah?
Speaker 1: What's going on?
Speaker 9: I got I got a lot going on. I thought
Speaker 9: maybe i'd call in and.
Speaker 14: Uh, don't take the wrong way.
Speaker 9: You guys are a lot older than me, and uh,
Speaker 9: I think it's best to ask you, guys, you got
Speaker 9: a lot more experience on the planet than me, about
Speaker 9: what you think about the ship I got going on.
Speaker 9: I mean I already see got it.
Speaker 2: Thank you for respecting your elders exactly.
Speaker 15: Well, yeah, I don't want to just call you guys old.
Speaker 1: How old are you, Aiden?
Speaker 15: Molde nineteen?
Speaker 1: Okay, from the way you're talking, I thought you would
Speaker 1: be like seventeen. Hmmm, No, Aiden, what's going on? Tell
Speaker 1: us everything? Tell us nothing, get us, get us.
Speaker 14: Well.
Speaker 9: One of my main things is, uh, I can't really
Speaker 9: commit to one person. What bro I like a lot
Speaker 9: of high school for five years, be it her round
Speaker 9: and off, and now I don't know. I've just I
Speaker 9: seek out a lot of affection from other women, That's
Speaker 9: what she said. And I guess I just continue to
Speaker 9: do so part of it maybe because my dad really
Speaker 9: isn't around all the time. He was always in and
Speaker 9: out of jail, so kind of kind of rough. I mean,
Speaker 9: being a man, in my eyes is kind of hard.
Speaker 9: Still trying to figure that out, Which is like I said,
Speaker 9: why I like to talk to people who are a
Speaker 9: lot older than me, because I mean, the way I
Speaker 9: see it is some people go to jail forty to
Speaker 9: lights and like I can't even comprehend that. You know,
Speaker 9: I've been on the planet for twenty years and I
Speaker 9: wasn't even cognitive for all of them.
Speaker 2: Well, you already sound like you've got a head start
Speaker 2: on things you've got to You're very you seem just
Speaker 2: to have the perspective to know to talk to us.
Speaker 2: Seems like you've you've got a head start. And I'm
Speaker 2: keeping your nose clean and staying out of trouble.
Speaker 1: I can't stay tule.
Speaker 9: I do try to stay out of trouble. I mean,
Speaker 9: now I try my best I mean considering seeing where
Speaker 9: my dad ended up, you know, but it's.
Speaker 14: Hard, I really really that the.
Speaker 9: Yeah I am, I really am.
Speaker 1: When you're what kinds of things are you getting in trouble?
Speaker 12: For nowadays, it's pretty much just it'd be like possession
Speaker 12: or being somewhere I'm not supposed to hanging around motherfuckers.
Speaker 9: I shouldn't, and I really don't anymore. When I was younger,
Speaker 9: I was hanging around some really grimy people. I didn't
Speaker 9: really have no friends, and the only people that were
Speaker 9: friends with me were the grinding kids on the side
Speaker 9: of town. So I got roked in with a real
Speaker 9: bad crowd. And then ultimately I feel like I just
Speaker 9: kind of copied down their mannerisms and started doing a
Speaker 9: whole bunch of you know, shit I shouldn't. Like nowadays,
Speaker 9: I'm still you know, doing thats bombs. I'm taking a
Speaker 9: shitload of acid and molly, and I'm fucking doing black
Speaker 9: and Buddha every day, Like I can't I a day
Speaker 9: where I do.
Speaker 1: Yeah, but it's black and Buddha.
Speaker 9: It's it's a smokeable form of opium black.
Speaker 8: With weed.
Speaker 2: Well, it sounds like you have a drug problem.
Speaker 9: Yeah, I try my best to do it in moderation.
Speaker 2: Well you can't, man, this is serious stuff. This opioids
Speaker 2: are very serious. They're very addictive, and you don't have
Speaker 2: necessarily the control to be in charge of that. So
Speaker 2: I would suggest you get some professional help.
Speaker 1: I do. I do.
Speaker 9: I've been to rehab a few times. There's a lot
Speaker 9: of things I don't do anymore. I was doing heroin
Speaker 9: with my cousin. We were at my grandfather's house and
Speaker 9: he dropped dead. We were going to the liquor store
Speaker 9: and that he was just laying in the screen door,
Speaker 9: and by the time he came back, he was still
Speaker 9: there and probably wasn't even alive anymore.
Speaker 14: So that that got me to kick that.
Speaker 1: But can I ask you a question? So, I I
Speaker 1: know you said you went to rehab a few times.
Speaker 1: Are you, like currently have professional help?
Speaker 9: Yeah, yeah, I do. I see a therapist. I don't
Speaker 9: go to a psychiatrist anymore. I find frequently that going
Speaker 9: to them, they don't ever talk to me about my problems.
Speaker 9: They just kind of load me up on drugs. And
Speaker 9: I'm like, I already do that. I'm looking to I'm
Speaker 9: looking to have someone sit down and have a conversation
Speaker 9: with me, and to me, it's not ideal therapy. I
Speaker 9: kind of hate the idea of someone, you know, paying
Speaker 9: someone to care about you. And I got a lot
Speaker 9: of people around me who care and listen. But I
Speaker 9: do seek out therapy, even though I don't see it
Speaker 9: as you know, so great.
Speaker 6: It's just.
Speaker 1: What do you.
Speaker 2: What do you what do you aspire towards? What do
Speaker 2: you aspire to be or what? What are your interests?
Speaker 1: Like?
Speaker 2: What do you want to do with your life?
Speaker 9: Well, right now I'm getting my certifications from comp CIA.
Speaker 9: I'm getting an A plus, a security plus, and a
Speaker 9: network plus.
Speaker 14: Those are the three.
Speaker 9: Main things I'm doing right now because I'm not going
Speaker 9: to like a college or anything.
Speaker 1: What are those?
Speaker 2: I missed?
Speaker 1: What that is?
Speaker 6: Is that?
Speaker 2: Uh like a tech stuff?
Speaker 14: Yeah?
Speaker 9: It basically what I want to do is I'd start
Speaker 9: out in it and then I'd end up doing network security.
Speaker 9: The ideal to work penetration testing company. That'd be pretty cool.
Speaker 2: Hey, yo, this is a cheap joke.
Speaker 1: I like, I like, uh that, I mean you got
Speaker 1: your head on. Yeah.
Speaker 2: That's why I'm confused because it's like, well, then I
Speaker 2: don't think you should be like you got to lay
Speaker 2: off the hard stuff a little bit and focus and
Speaker 2: uh get uh you know, get get a get on
Speaker 2: a path towards success, which sounds like you're on the path.
Speaker 2: But the opio I'm opium. What do you take?
Speaker 6: Opium?
Speaker 1: Yeah?
Speaker 2: Man, that's like, that's that's bad news.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 2: I just try to get get that out of your
Speaker 2: life as soon as possible can.
Speaker 1: I ask. I want to ask you this one.
Speaker 2: To be a down like good advice.
Speaker 1: I don't think that's I don't think you're being a
Speaker 1: downer by telling him not to do opium. I think
Speaker 1: that that's No.
Speaker 9: I don't think so at all. I think it's very reasonable.
Speaker 1: I want to know one thing from you, and I
Speaker 1: asked I like asking this to people. So you're ceor
Speaker 1: have professional health, that's good. Tell me is there anything
Speaker 1: that you're a therapy? I know you said you don't
Speaker 1: like therapy and whatnot, and I get it, But is
Speaker 1: there anything that your real therapist has told you that's
Speaker 1: been particularly helpful?
Speaker 14: Yeah?
Speaker 9: I really believe her when she says that most of
Speaker 9: my drug use is probably just me holding myself back
Speaker 9: because my dad wasn't around, and like I got raped
Speaker 9: twice when I was a kid by a family member.
Speaker 9: So there's a lot of things that I feel like
Speaker 9: kind of took away my manhood. And now I don't
Speaker 9: have a man in my life to kind of teach
Speaker 9: me to do that.
Speaker 1: Though.
Speaker 9: I feel like in the times where I feel like
Speaker 9: I'm not doing so a lot, that's when I go off.
Speaker 9: When I start doing you know, all the shit to
Speaker 9: make me happier, Like if I'm gonna, you know, do
Speaker 9: a math bomb or some molire assid just shroom like,
Speaker 9: that's when that happens.
Speaker 2: But I just would you like replace that stuff with
Speaker 2: like oreos, Like if you had oreos, they're very satisfying.
Speaker 1: Yeah, they're like crack.
Speaker 2: Yeah, maybe it's maybe, I mean, perhaps it's not. It's
Speaker 2: also dangerous to overdo oreos.
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's my that's my version of all this stuff.
Speaker 1: Sorry to interrupt, No, it's okay.
Speaker 9: I feel like I kind of replaced eating a lot
Speaker 9: with with working out. I don't like to eat too
Speaker 9: much anymore. I do eat three thousand calories a day
Speaker 9: because I'm trying to hit one eighties at wait one
Speaker 9: thirty nine right now. But I mean, I think my
Speaker 9: main issue is that I can't commit to women. I'm
Speaker 9: you know, I kind of just.
Speaker 2: Well, you're only nineteen, yeah, I said, I thought this
Speaker 2: was early in the conversation. There's gonna be a little
Speaker 2: lighter Yeah, but uh, yeah, you're only nineteen. I don't
Speaker 2: think you should have a great expectation or anybody should
Speaker 2: have great expectation from you to commit. Yeah, unless you're
Speaker 2: really feeling like, unless you have somebody that you really feel,
Speaker 2: uh you're like a special connection with, then you really
Speaker 2: want to be in the commitment. But if you're not
Speaker 2: feeling it, you're not feeling.
Speaker 1: It, and you do listen. I also I want to
Speaker 1: I want to say, and also because like you can't
Speaker 1: if you're if you are have a lot of stuff
Speaker 1: you're working on for yourself, you can't. You don't want
Speaker 1: to bring another person's stuff into that because you know,
Speaker 1: you got to figure out your aunt thing. Yeah, I mean, look, man,
Speaker 1: you're a sound like a smart fucking guy. Absolutely, gom
Speaker 1: Like you're a smart fucking guy. You have your head
Speaker 1: on straight. I know it's tough dealing with all this stuff,
Speaker 1: but there's like physical fucking things going on. But like, dude,
Speaker 1: I follow, like I don't know if this means anything
Speaker 1: to you, But like follow the light because it's bright up.
Speaker 2: Well, and also follow your gut. And you don't need
Speaker 2: necessarily a father figure because you seem like you get
Speaker 2: it and you you can be you can let you
Speaker 2: can listen to yourself and follow your your gut and
Speaker 2: your your inner inner inner monologue or your inner voice
Speaker 2: that seems like knows what you need to do. But
Speaker 2: the idea of a father figure, I mean, I had
Speaker 2: a good dad. I have a good dad, But you know,
Speaker 2: there it's I've made. I made a lot of things
Speaker 2: happen in my own head by thinking about it. And
Speaker 2: and and if you're nineteen, uh, you know, maybe you
Speaker 2: can maybe there's somebody, Uh, I don't know, there's somebody
Speaker 2: else in your life that that that where you, where
Speaker 2: you're working, that you could pick up little things from
Speaker 2: or you know, I don't think that's essential. It's not
Speaker 2: an excuse to be uh doing these hard drugs and
Speaker 2: dangerous drugs because you don't have a father figure. I
Speaker 2: would I try to like expunge that as an excuse
Speaker 2: or and expunge that as a reason why you're not
Speaker 2: doing what in a.
Speaker 9: Good agree I think it's an excuse. M.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's a it's a convenient one. It's it sounds right,
Speaker 2: but it's not necessarily the case.
Speaker 1: Aiden man. Is there anything else that that that you
Speaker 1: want to say about this or that that you feel
Speaker 1: like we didn't cover, just anything in general that you
Speaker 1: want to say before we go.
Speaker 9: No, No, I just really appreciate you guys taking the
Speaker 9: time to talk, and I appreciate it.
Speaker 1: Yeah, for sure, be helpful.
Speaker 9: And I think I'm gonna wake up tomorrow and try
Speaker 9: to kick the black and Buddha maybe like try to
Speaker 9: micro does on some screams or something.
Speaker 6: I definitely don't.
Speaker 9: I think you guys are right. I don't think I
Speaker 9: need to be doing this shit especially good.
Speaker 14: I don't, like, I don't.
Speaker 9: Even have any pain, so I don't know why I'm
Speaker 9: doing it.
Speaker 2: You're right, And if if it might not be that easy.
Speaker 2: So if you if it, if it is challenging, don't
Speaker 2: give up and reach out and find find some real
Speaker 2: help because we're not that No, No, we're not licensed.
Speaker 1: No, Unfortunately, I do.
Speaker 9: Know to seek out real help. I just really wanted
Speaker 9: to ask your guys' input on it. Like I said,
Speaker 9: you guys have been on this surf a lot longer
Speaker 9: than me, but the idea of people being forty years
Speaker 9: old is just unfathomable to me. I haven't even been
Speaker 9: cognitive for twenty years. So I just really appreciate you
Speaker 9: guys giving me your.
Speaker 6: Insight on it.
Speaker 9: I understand it's not sure or anything, but it's been
Speaker 9: really helpful.
Speaker 14: I do appreciate it.
Speaker 9: I'm really going to take the advice to heart.
Speaker 2: You're right, good, happy to do it.
Speaker 1: Hey, take care of it.
Speaker 14: You guys have a great night. I appreciate it.
Speaker 2: You too, Yeah, you too, take care. Be safe.
Speaker 1: Man. That guy he's like, that's it's.
Speaker 2: Confusing, right, because he's so articulate. Yeah, yeah, you know
Speaker 2: you can tell he's very seems like you could imagine
Speaker 2: that God.
Speaker 1: Be very motivated. Yeah. Absolutely.
Speaker 2: And then to hear him talk about doing meth bombs
Speaker 2: and black and budha and just make me made me
Speaker 2: sad because that's a that's a dark path if you're
Speaker 2: not careful.
Speaker 1: I hope, I I don't know. It's I'm glad to
Speaker 1: hear he was saying that he's gonna go into it
Speaker 1: and he has like a y like everything everything the
Speaker 1: path forward felt very clear. Like that's what I meant
Speaker 1: when I was talking about the light, Like I really
Speaker 1: saw it in him. Yeah, you know, yeah.
Speaker 2: When you're nineteen, I mean, life can seem like that's
Speaker 2: all life is, that that little world you live in
Speaker 2: right there. But man, there's so much to come, so
Speaker 2: much fun, great stuff to come, and adventures and and
Speaker 2: and bad things are coming and and but but exciting
Speaker 2: things are coming to when you're that age.
Speaker 1: When you were like nineteen or early, what were you
Speaker 1: angsty as a person?
Speaker 2: Yeah, a little bit, a little bit, Yeah, a little angsty,
Speaker 2: but a bit of a bit of a goofball id.
Speaker 2: I found that. My wife told me that one of
Speaker 2: the greatest compliments she heard from somebody else about me
Speaker 2: just the other day. Because there's a few of our
Speaker 2: friends that I've known, I've known since college that we're
Speaker 2: all still friends and we're currently they have a daughter
Speaker 2: that's my son's age, so we see them a lot.
Speaker 2: And my wife was like, I was talking to Christina
Speaker 2: and we were talking about all you guys back in
Speaker 2: the old days, back in the college days, and what
Speaker 2: you were all like and how different you all were.
Speaker 2: But she said, but Tim was this is the same
Speaker 2: as he was. He's the same as he was as
Speaker 2: he is now real And it was a compliment. It
Speaker 2: wasn't like he's always you know. It was like he's
Speaker 2: been very he's very even. Uh it's funny, you know,
Speaker 2: and and can be you know, it's not perfect, but
Speaker 2: he's uh, he's always been the same.
Speaker 1: This is this is kind of interesting to transition into
Speaker 1: something I did want to talk to you about, and
Speaker 1: I've heard you talk about it on another podcasts, like
Speaker 1: you're you're making more sincere appearances as yourself. Do you
Speaker 1: feel like anything like within you changed to want to
Speaker 1: be less? I guess fuck around?
Speaker 2: Ye yeah, like like like perhaps having kids is a
Speaker 2: bigger deal than I thought it was going to be.
Speaker 1: Huh. But also.
Speaker 2: The analogy if people might not know this reference, but
Speaker 2: Andy Kaufman. Andy Kaufman was very a big influential person
Speaker 2: to me. He was almost entirely always in character. Whenever
Speaker 2: you saw him, he was always doing some bit. He
Speaker 2: was always doing, you know, not not talking about himself
Speaker 2: in any kind of genuine way. Yeah, And that was
Speaker 2: his whole thing, And that was what I wanted to do,
Speaker 2: and that's what Eric wanted to do. And that was
Speaker 2: kind of all our our focus on that, aside from
Speaker 2: the making of the stuff. It was like, well, if
Speaker 2: I was going to do an interview or you know,
Speaker 2: be on somebody's show, I would want to make sure
Speaker 2: that there was that it was funny and that it
Speaker 2: was interesting and challenging in some way. Andy Kaufman died,
Speaker 2: you know, when he was I think thirty eight or
Speaker 2: forty or something. Yeah, pretty well, I think maybe, yeah,
Speaker 2: maybe mid thirties. Died of cancer. And I always say, like,
Speaker 2: if you had lived that, stick would have gotten old,
Speaker 2: you know, that he wouldn't have been able to keep
Speaker 2: that going. It would have for himself, he would have
Speaker 2: been exhausted by it, and it would have wouldn't have
Speaker 2: been fun anymore.
Speaker 1: And so.
Speaker 2: I still like to laugh and joke around and if
Speaker 2: there's some occasion that that feels right to do a
Speaker 2: bit with and to be in character certainly lots of places,
Speaker 2: But I don't want to like stop myself from just
Speaker 2: being myself for for what, for no reason anymore? Yeah,
Speaker 2: And I find I have more to offer than just
Speaker 2: than just doing bits.
Speaker 1: Were when you started having more sincere appearances, as was
Speaker 1: any part of you afraid that it would dilute when
Speaker 1: you do want to go out and do bits.
Speaker 2: Uh No, I mean if I'm gonna do a bit now,
Speaker 2: it would it would be I don't know, there'd be
Speaker 2: something very clearly signaling that in what I'm doing or
Speaker 2: talking about. But I still get. I mean, there's still people,
Speaker 2: and we live very much in an age now. I
Speaker 2: believe of literalism, and and people are very which is
Speaker 2: a little paradoxical because you think everybody would be so skeptical,
Speaker 2: but people are very quick to believe what they see
Speaker 2: and hear. Right, Yeah, do you agree.
Speaker 1: I see what you're saying. The more people are taking
Speaker 1: things at face Valt, yeah, yes.
Speaker 2: For instance, I assume that when I said I was
Speaker 2: a scientologist, that a large number of people just like
Speaker 2: he's a scientologist. Why would he joke? Why would he not?
Speaker 2: Why would he be lying?
Speaker 14: You know?
Speaker 2: But I have a very like, you know, dry sense
Speaker 2: of humor, and it also might not click with a
Speaker 2: lot of people. But when it does click with people,
Speaker 2: the people that know me and get my rhythms whatever,
Speaker 2: might have enjoyed that joke because they know I'm not
Speaker 2: a scientologist.
Speaker 1: I mean, part of them enjoying the joke, I mean,
Speaker 1: of course, but like a part of them enjoying the
Speaker 1: joke is the people that don't.
Speaker 2: Don't get the joke joke, of course. But obviously I
Speaker 2: think even in my most most sort of nihilistic or
Speaker 2: or confrontational comedy, there's still in me a desire to
Speaker 2: express myself and to be understood right and to be
Speaker 2: appre and to be uh, you know, rewarded through applause.
Speaker 1: We were talking about that earlier, the appreciate what it
Speaker 1: was like, What do you feel like you the mediums
Speaker 1: that you were going through in the way that you
Speaker 1: were going about it, do you feel like you were
Speaker 1: not being understood through that?
Speaker 2: Well, it was being understood by a portion of a
Speaker 2: small group of people who really got it, really felt
Speaker 2: personal connection to it, of course, but that you know,
Speaker 2: then there's a big bucket of people that didn't and
Speaker 2: were didn't didn't care for it at all, which is
Speaker 2: you know, I mean, that's that's everybody. But and I
Speaker 2: and we I don't I guess, uh, we never try
Speaker 2: to win.
Speaker 1: Over the whole room. Yeah, you just do what you do.
Speaker 2: You just do whatever is in your mind, and you
Speaker 2: try to make it as good as it can be
Speaker 2: and hope it works. I'd prefer everybody loved dollar, you know,
Speaker 2: I'm not trying to well sure, why not?
Speaker 5: Oh?
Speaker 1: I feel like even like as just as like being
Speaker 1: a human being, if your desire is for like, if
Speaker 1: you're just living your life and you want everyone to
Speaker 1: like just as a person, it's different, different with being
Speaker 1: a person than with making a thing, I guess, I.
Speaker 2: Mean from a from a business from a economic perspective,
Speaker 2: the more people that are into your shit, the easier
Speaker 2: it is, the more t shirts I can get, or
Speaker 2: just the easier it is to do stuff, which is
Speaker 2: the easier it is to make stuff.
Speaker 1: Because power your control.
Speaker 2: So, like, my favorite group is the Beatles.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I don't.
Speaker 2: I think they certainly probably did things to try to
Speaker 2: appeal to as many people as possible, but they didn't
Speaker 2: go out of there, they didn't go crazy doing that.
Speaker 2: They just were themselves. Yeah, and they did it over
Speaker 2: and they worked really hard on it and they got
Speaker 2: really good at it. But they were pretty much just
Speaker 2: them doing what they wanted to do, and for whatever reason,
Speaker 2: that connected with everybody, and.
Speaker 1: You felt like buying being not being understood by you know,
Speaker 1: broadly made it harder to just make stuff and get
Speaker 1: the money that you need, yeah, get cameras.
Speaker 2: And we're in that level of and this we're not
Speaker 2: at this level, but we're in that pool of like
Speaker 2: David Lynch or people that are doing very personal things
Speaker 2: that are that we all know, like I know, when
Speaker 2: we're making stuff that's like, well, this isn't for my mom,
Speaker 2: you know, this isn't for but I went. But at
Speaker 2: the same time, I could still wish that it was
Speaker 2: more about It's more about them than us, you know
Speaker 2: what I mean.
Speaker 1: Yeah, But the people who it's for, they absolutely love
Speaker 1: it and it's so.
Speaker 2: And it's great and so, like I said, I'm never
Speaker 2: trying to do I'm never like changing my approach to
Speaker 2: reach a more bigger audience. All I'm saying is how
Speaker 2: nice would it be if we were the Beatles?
Speaker 1: But would suck? Well?
Speaker 2: Two of them are dead.
Speaker 1: Two of them are dead. One sounds kind of nice.
Speaker 2: From violence, gun violence, one from cancer. But they say,
Speaker 2: do you know about George Harrison being violently knife attacked
Speaker 2: in his home? I don't, like, you know before he died,
Speaker 2: obviously he was a crazed person broke into his house
Speaker 2: and attacked him with a knife and nearly killed him.
Speaker 2: And they say that kind of sped up his his
Speaker 2: own death.
Speaker 1: That's just getting stabbed with a knife will absolutely speed
Speaker 1: up your own death in many situations.
Speaker 2: So, yes, there's a downside to being in the Beatles,
Speaker 2: I guess, but I don't know. I'm not sure where
Speaker 2: the question started.
Speaker 1: Well, beetles are not you will die.
Speaker 2: The trick is. The other truth is like, as I
Speaker 2: get older, it's exhausting to come up with, you know,
Speaker 2: bits every time somebody asked me to. So it's sort
Speaker 2: of like, yeah, I better let that go because I
Speaker 2: actually do there's you know, like there's many sides to
Speaker 2: what I want to do, and I'm absolutely in loving
Speaker 2: the hell out of talking to people, you know, I
Speaker 2: love it. So I'm not forcing myself into doing something
Speaker 2: I don't want to do. It would be stupid and
Speaker 2: embarrassing and cringey if I was like doing a bit
Speaker 2: this whole time.
Speaker 1: When you're doing it, like when you're it's just for
Speaker 1: eleven minutes, you can do it. Well, I mean you've
Speaker 1: done a bit for four hours at a time.
Speaker 2: Yeah, Well but it is when that's when I want
Speaker 2: that idea to exist. Yes, and it's controlled and it's
Speaker 2: worked on, and it's it's put out there for a reason.
Speaker 2: But yeah, if my whole identity is wrapped in irony
Speaker 2: and bits, you know, I'm a miserable guy. Oh yeah,
Speaker 2: And clearly I'm not a miserable guy.
Speaker 1: First, when I first started doing this, I was a
Speaker 1: little bit more, a little bit more distant, a little
Speaker 1: more like maybe I'll like fuck with people and like.
Speaker 2: But then you talk to that guy and you're like,
Speaker 2: I can't fuck with that.
Speaker 1: I can't fuck with that dude. That's what When I
Speaker 1: was in high school, I was soap. I was I
Speaker 1: wanted to make stuff like like I saw like Kyle
Speaker 1: Mooney's interviews where he would do on the street stuff
Speaker 1: and like fuck with people, and I was like, that
Speaker 1: is hilarious. I want to do that. And I would
Speaker 1: fuck with people. And then folks start, you know, like
Speaker 1: folks start like, you know, getting vulnerable and like I
Speaker 1: can't fuck with them. And even and now I'm like
Speaker 1: I I I it's more enjoyable to not fuck with people.
Speaker 2: And that's part of I think my evolution is happening.
Speaker 2: At the same time as I think comedy might be
Speaker 2: evolving in a way of we've like the Man on
Speaker 2: the Street prank Show, the prank shows, the it's funny,
Speaker 2: but some of it feels a little like we're all tired,
Speaker 2: like mean spirited. Yeah, like we don't we don't well,
Speaker 2: and it's and it's and it's overdone and it's been
Speaker 2: done a million times and stuff. So it's uh, I mean, yeah,
Speaker 2: there's still people doing great work and funny stuff, but
Speaker 2: I think a lot of people I know in comedy
Speaker 2: are having this kind of like what are we doing here?
Speaker 2: I lifetime and we but we also know that there's
Speaker 2: value in making people laugh because laughing is a good
Speaker 2: healthy thing to do and h and so I don't know,
Speaker 2: you know, just uh, as you get older, you just
Speaker 2: you look at your work, you look at other people's work,
Speaker 2: and you think, all right, well, what what what.
Speaker 1: Am I doing?
Speaker 2: What could be what's the best way to do this?
Speaker 1: You know?
Speaker 2: And sometimes it isn't being entirely entrenched in irony.
Speaker 1: I mean, you're totally right that that would just be exhausting.
Speaker 1: And if I did this pot it's like if you
Speaker 1: do a podcast where you're talking to people or where
Speaker 1: you're just live for hours a week. To be in
Speaker 1: a thing like that is fucking exhausting. Take a call
Speaker 1: as you wish. Hello, Hello, Hello, is this the gek
Speaker 1: This is two geckos. This is uh Lyle and Tim
Speaker 1: and we're geckos and we're talking to people and we're
Speaker 1: living life. How you doing?
Speaker 4: Oh my god, I'm good.
Speaker 17: How are you guys?
Speaker 2: Great?
Speaker 1: What's what's going on? Riley? How's life?
Speaker 18: Uh?
Speaker 4: I called in to talk about my irrational fear of butterflies.
Speaker 1: Irrational fear of butterflies.
Speaker 2: You should be very afraid.
Speaker 1: In many countries butterflies have venomous bites.
Speaker 2: Actually, yeah, I'd stay the hell away.
Speaker 1: Where's your fear come from?
Speaker 4: I have no idea, because I've always had it. Like
Speaker 4: I remember in kindergarten we were like we had like
Speaker 4: this butterfly project where we would like sort of grow
Speaker 4: them in the classroom, and I was just horrified. I
Speaker 4: couldn't go near the cages. And I would like draw
Speaker 4: pictures of like fanged butterflies and give them to my parents.
Speaker 4: And like it's been like a long time, and I
Speaker 4: don't know where it stems from.
Speaker 1: What about moths? You know?
Speaker 4: I haven't really had a whole lot of experience with
Speaker 4: like big scary moths, but I can imagine they would
Speaker 4: be the same.
Speaker 1: Gotcha, I feel like it'd be worse. I don't think
Speaker 1: it'd be the same.
Speaker 2: Moths are kind of gross, but then when when you
Speaker 2: smash them, they just turned to dust A lot of time. Yeah,
Speaker 2: I have never crushed them. I've never touched a butterfly. Butterfly,
Speaker 2: I've never I've never killed a butterfly. It seems like
Speaker 2: bad luck.
Speaker 1: Have you ever killed a butterfly?
Speaker 10: Riley?
Speaker 9: I have not.
Speaker 4: I don't get close enough to do that.
Speaker 1: I just now.
Speaker 9: Use explosure therapy, but it hasn't worked.
Speaker 4: Oh yeah, my boyfriend's here. He took me to a
Speaker 4: butterfly room once and it was horrible.
Speaker 1: Did he know? Did he take you to a butterfly
Speaker 1: room knowing that you're afraid of butterflies?
Speaker 4: Yet?
Speaker 2: Here's what I'm going to predict. I have a little
Speaker 2: I don't like to make predictions, but here's my prediction.
Speaker 1: How old are you? Riley?
Speaker 4: Eighteen?
Speaker 2: Okay, Riley, I'm going to predict. I'm envisioning Riley as
Speaker 2: a thirty five year old woman, very confident in her life.
Speaker 2: Maybe she's not with this dude she's with now. Believe me,
Speaker 2: I don't think that's happening. But you're a very you're
Speaker 2: in a great place. You're a great great you're married
Speaker 2: or whatever you are. Maybe you got a couple of kids.
Speaker 2: You're having a glass of mine, and the hell it's
Speaker 2: your birthday, right, And you and your friend you're good
Speaker 2: friends from high school, some of them and some work friends.
Speaker 2: You're sitting around and you're laughing, and you're talking about
Speaker 2: the old days, and you go, do you know something?
Speaker 2: This is so embarrassing. When I was eighteen, I was
Speaker 2: so scared of And they go, what.
Speaker 1: Uh getting killed? Or what? We're so scared of? What
Speaker 1: falling off a bridge?
Speaker 10: No?
Speaker 1: I was scared of butterflies. Can you believe that?
Speaker 2: You're all laughing, tears rolling down your face and you
Speaker 2: won't even remember why. All you remember is that you
Speaker 2: were scared of butterflies, and you know it's just gonna pass.
Speaker 1: I love that some good perspective. What do you think
Speaker 1: of that, Riley?
Speaker 4: I mean, yeah, that makes sense. The only thing is
Speaker 4: I like, I know they're harmless, Like I'm not like
Speaker 4: afraid of what they'll do to me or anything. But
Speaker 4: like every time I see one and every time it
Speaker 4: comes near me, it's like an instant like fight or
Speaker 4: flight reaction. Like I don't know what it is. I
Speaker 4: know that they're safe, but they're just I.
Speaker 1: Think you should choose fight every time until all of
Speaker 1: the butterflies are gone, and that way you won't have
Speaker 1: a problem anymore.
Speaker 2: Yes, the world would be a better place for you
Speaker 2: in a high butterfly population area.
Speaker 1: Do you need to move really?
Speaker 9: Possibly?
Speaker 4: I'm in like the least populated butterfly.
Speaker 1: Zone, like two seconds. Can you put them on for
Speaker 1: like a second? Hi?
Speaker 16: Tim, I'm a huge fans.
Speaker 2: Always the boyfriend. Well, thank you. I'm sorry I disparage
Speaker 2: your relationship there. I just I don't know.
Speaker 1: I was gonna why why? Why was it okay? Because
Speaker 1: I'm thinking two things. Did you take her to the
Speaker 1: butterfly sanctuary and as an act of good faith because
Speaker 1: you thought it would be exposure therapy or because you
Speaker 1: thought it would be funny or maybe a little bit
Speaker 1: of it.
Speaker 16: I got to say it's probably a little bit of both,
Speaker 16: but mostly exposure therapy, because I think it's funny when
Speaker 16: like we're outside and one passes by and she flips out,
Speaker 16: so like, maybe if we go to room, then she's like, oh,
Speaker 16: they're harmless. Didn't work though, and you're allowed to kill.
Speaker 16: Fight wasn't an option.
Speaker 2: I take it back. You guys are going to be
Speaker 2: together on that thirty fifth birthday Classic class of Wine.
Speaker 1: Riley, anything else you want to say to the people
Speaker 1: the computer before you go?
Speaker 7: What about you?
Speaker 14: Cal uh?
Speaker 16: I have a wrestling tournament on Saturday. If you guys
Speaker 16: could just wish me good luck, that would mean the world.
Speaker 1: Good luck, good luck. Maybe that's allowed ye pin the
Speaker 1: pin them and pin them quickly. Hey, take care, Riley,
Speaker 1: thank you. Wrestling is it's a lot. I was terrible.
Speaker 2: I used to do the fourth grade wrestling.
Speaker 1: You're fourth care wrestling?
Speaker 2: Yeah, terrible. Just get pinned right away.
Speaker 1: I used to do sock wrestling. You know what that is? No,
Speaker 1: it's like we stand like this and I try to
Speaker 1: take your sock off and you try to take off.
Speaker 1: I feel like it's more teach my kids that that.
Speaker 1: But they'd love that. Yeah, we did that at at camp.
Speaker 1: Sounds abusive. Get this another, Riley, Come on, Riley, that
Speaker 1: it is how you doing? Riley with a man's voice.
Speaker 14: Yeah, I get that a lot. Actually, how is it hanging?
Speaker 14: I'm doing all right.
Speaker 19: I'm just about to set off the work, Riley.
Speaker 1: Is there anything particularly called in to talk about today?
Speaker 19: Yeah, I have a little dilemma on my hands. Actually,
Speaker 19: a couple of months ago, I was at a yard
Speaker 19: sale and like, I found of a Facebook. It was
Speaker 19: a Facebook, Yeah, it was Facebook. Went on to Facebook
Speaker 19: and I bought like, uh, this crate of old games
Speaker 19: off this old lady that she posted on the yard
Speaker 19: sale site.
Speaker 5: And apparently she was not supposed to do that. And
Speaker 5: apparently I don't know how they did it. They probably
Speaker 5: like look me up in the group or something, but
Speaker 5: they trapped me down and asked for the stuff back.
Speaker 2: And so somebody owned the box of tapes and she
Speaker 2: just put it out accidentally.
Speaker 19: Yeah, Like they were all old like video games from
Speaker 19: like the ne e s all the way up to
Speaker 19: like I think the it wast one.
Speaker 14: Of like the Wii, and yeah.
Speaker 2: Your money, say say sorry or say oh yeah, this
Speaker 2: stuff happens, you know, and sorry, no hard feelings.
Speaker 1: I'm gonna give I was gonna I'm gonna give you.
Speaker 1: I want to do you have a compelling reason as
Speaker 1: to why you want to keep the games.
Speaker 14: Yes, I do collect old game like I have a.
Speaker 2: I've got them from somewhere else.
Speaker 1: You don't think that stuff is like everywhere. I thought
Speaker 1: it would be like, oh, but I gave them to
Speaker 1: my little cousin and now he or something like that.
Speaker 1: It's all about him.
Speaker 10: Like uh, like these are like rare games.
Speaker 1: You know you know where you are, you know you
Speaker 1: ever seen Toy Story two? Yeah, you're fucking alf toy
Speaker 1: barn guy.
Speaker 10: I'm not I'm not selling them like I want to
Speaker 10: keep them from me.
Speaker 2: Well, what did these guys say? They were heard adults,
Speaker 2: but what well, there's no adults in this situation.
Speaker 1: Believe what were you going to say? You were going
Speaker 1: to say that the reason why they want them back, which,
Speaker 1: what's the reason they told you they want them back?
Speaker 10: Well apparently like they weren't supposed to put them out,
Speaker 10: but they did anyway, And I just happened to be there.
Speaker 1: All right. And do you know that reddit? What's that Reddit?
Speaker 1: Am I the asshole? You're the asshole? I hate to
Speaker 1: tell you, because you have every right to keep the games. Okay,
Speaker 1: under the law law, you can keep the games.
Speaker 2: But if you've absorbed the situation that there was a
Speaker 2: mistake made, the nice thing to do would be to
Speaker 2: return the games and get your money back, assuming they
Speaker 2: would give you all your money back. I assume that's
Speaker 2: that's part of the right.
Speaker 10: Yeah, Like, I don't die and.
Speaker 18: Just be dude.
Speaker 2: You're twenty two years old. This is a great opportunity
Speaker 2: for you to say I made a sacrifice. I did
Speaker 2: something I didn't want to do. I'm giving up this
Speaker 2: irrelevant thing that I'm collecting. No disrespect, but I mean
Speaker 2: i'll I'll retract that. I I can honor and respect
Speaker 2: your your desire to collect things. I don't personally understand it,
Speaker 2: but okay, let's let's just say this is important to you. Right,
Speaker 2: Am I wrong?
Speaker 1: Do the right thing?
Speaker 2: Yeah, well, do the right thing, return it.
Speaker 1: I bet you.
Speaker 2: I don't believe in this kind of stuff, but I
Speaker 2: bet you two days later.
Speaker 1: Something's Gonnath's gonna happen. Happen. I still believe.
Speaker 2: Can I just get your pledge that you will do that?
Speaker 1: What do we think here? Are they?
Speaker 10: Well? I want to but like, there are some games
Speaker 10: in there. There's one in particular, it's a Pokemon Gale
Speaker 10: of Darkness and it goes for two hundred and fifty
Speaker 10: dollars online.
Speaker 2: Well, maybe you can negotiate with these guys two hundred
Speaker 2: and fifty dollars. That's I mean, that's no. I mean,
Speaker 2: in the great scheme of things, you can't hang on
Speaker 2: to two hundred fifty dollars like it's the only thing
Speaker 2: that exists in the world. So if you want to,
Speaker 2: maybe I would say, do one round of negotiating with
Speaker 2: these guys.
Speaker 1: I find that makes it. That's what makes it. That
Speaker 1: makes it worse. I almost think that makes it worse.
Speaker 2: Let me just say that, do they have an awareness
Speaker 2: of the value of these games?
Speaker 10: I don't think the woman that sold me them does,
Speaker 10: but I think like that guy who owned the games does.
Speaker 2: And that's why you went, well, yeah, I'll give you this,
Speaker 2: and option A is just do just just be a
Speaker 2: nice guy and give them back and say, oh man,
Speaker 2: option B is hey, I uh, I just want you
Speaker 2: to know I I I collected these games. Uh there's
Speaker 2: one game in here that has a good, good value
Speaker 2: to it.
Speaker 1: Would you put?
Speaker 2: Okay, well there's multiple so so you so I mean, listen,
Speaker 2: I just give him back to this is too much
Speaker 2: of us.
Speaker 1: Is too much. We've been talking about Riley, right, I would.
Speaker 2: It's not that we're talking about too much, but uh,
Speaker 2: it's too complicated to try to go in there and
Speaker 2: make a deal. And then you don't want this guy
Speaker 2: like you're just a dick if you don't do it,
Speaker 2: because it's just he seemed, you know, it seems like
Speaker 2: it was an honest mistake. So I would say, like
Speaker 2: Elsa says, let it go, let it.
Speaker 14: Go, I hate that movie.
Speaker 1: Rley, give the fucking games back, give him back.
Speaker 2: Perhaps you're right, but if you really want to push
Speaker 2: the issue, say, listen, these I collect these games. What
Speaker 2: did you pay for him?
Speaker 14: I pay fifty bucks for the whole bus?
Speaker 2: So I tell you what you want to be a
Speaker 2: real you wanna be a good guy, say I collect
Speaker 2: these games. Some of these games are very important to me.
Speaker 2: Could I give you an extra fifty bucks for it?
Speaker 2: So you're giving them, you're giving them one hundred bucks total. Okay,
Speaker 2: and you're still gonna come out if you want to
Speaker 2: sell these games.
Speaker 1: That's actually a damn good compromise.
Speaker 2: They say no, no, we want them back. Say okay,
Speaker 2: no problem, I'll come by. I drop the mom.
Speaker 1: That's a damn good compromise, you know, give it, give
Speaker 1: it a shot. Uh, you'd tell you does not want
Speaker 1: to give them extra fifty bucks for these for these games.
Speaker 10: I I see where you're coming from. I think that's
Speaker 10: the road I'm going to go down. Like, see, if
Speaker 10: I can't give them like a little bit more so
Speaker 10: I can keep them.
Speaker 2: Yeah, you don't think these guys want to go to
Speaker 2: eBay and look up how much these things are.
Speaker 1: You'd be surprised. A lot of people are selling ship
Speaker 1: that they just they don't even care to do that.
Speaker 1: They just want out of the house. Yeah.
Speaker 14: Yeah, I think that's like what the originally was the
Speaker 14: purpose of the art sale, and that's why like they
Speaker 14: put him out.
Speaker 2: All right, Well, let's get an update on this one.
Speaker 1: I am almost I am. I would not be surprised
Speaker 1: if you tried to sell this game, you didn't give
Speaker 1: him back. You tried to sell the money bay and
Speaker 1: you somehow got space and you sent it the game
Speaker 1: and some carmatic thing.
Speaker 14: No, like I don't, I'm I don't. I'm not a scalper,
Speaker 14: Like I don't do that.
Speaker 10: My one friend does that.
Speaker 14: He actually he he was the one that introduced me
Speaker 14: to the.
Speaker 2: Large thank you for not turning to these friends for advice.
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, the computer before we go.
Speaker 14: I uh, I think I'm gonna go down the road.
Speaker 14: I I'll negotiate with them and if they don't want
Speaker 14: the money, you're probably right.
Speaker 9: It wasn't it was a mistake.
Speaker 14: I guess I'll I guess I'll give.
Speaker 1: Him a back, beautiful, very good, proud of you. Thank you.
Speaker 1: Isn't it great when you get through to someone we'll
Speaker 1: see I mean, yeah, that's so funny that he was like,
Speaker 1: I don't do that, but I have a friend who does.
Speaker 2: That's a great story. That's a great story. And it's
Speaker 2: shocked because some there's some goons out there that be like, hey,
Speaker 2: you paid for it, you should get you know, the
Speaker 2: transaction occurred that to go to the letter of the law.
Speaker 2: But we have to be bigger than that sometimes. But
Speaker 2: I don't we don't know the whole situation.
Speaker 1: Well, I wanted to give him the benefit I thought
Speaker 1: he would have, So I can't think of what it is,
Speaker 1: some creative compelling that he gave him to somebody else
Speaker 1: already or something like that where it makes them more.
Speaker 2: Confect but he that was like like he's uh this,
Speaker 2: what's the guy from the.
Speaker 1: Lord of the Rings?
Speaker 9: My you?
Speaker 1: I thought this was mister Burns, my precious. Hello, Hi,
Speaker 1: how you doing good? How are you doing doing well?
Speaker 1: Hanging in there? You're on the phone with Lyle and Tim.
Speaker 1: We're two geckos. We're hanging out. What can we do
Speaker 1: for Your? Name is Lauren?
Speaker 18: Yeah? I My name is Lauren, and I have a
Speaker 18: little silly, little silly.
Speaker 17: Story for you.
Speaker 1: I'm into a silly story.
Speaker 18: Yeah, So do I just begin?
Speaker 1: You you anything?
Speaker 2: Please start in the middle?
Speaker 14: Can you can? You?
Speaker 1: Can we pulp fiction? This?
Speaker 2: That's the tell it out of order?
Speaker 1: Okay?
Speaker 18: Well, one time me and my husband were having some
Speaker 18: fun and I knew how to queef on demand, so
Speaker 18: I thought if I could just stuck in and as
Speaker 18: I was sucking in, he could put a ping ping
Speaker 18: pong ball inside there. And I sucked it and he
Speaker 18: put the ping pong ball inside and I pushed it
Speaker 18: out and it almost hit our ceiling fan. And I
Speaker 18: haven't been able to do it since. But my goodness,
Speaker 18: what a silly story that I would love to tell.
Speaker 9: A get go.
Speaker 1: See? How do you see? How do you suck it, Like, like,
Speaker 1: how do you charge a quiaf like that the fact
Speaker 1: that you cagle muscle you because I can't I could,
Speaker 1: I can't. Like I can fart, but I can't charge.
Speaker 1: I can't suck my fart in to give it some
Speaker 1: like start running space to charge out. That's kind of
Speaker 1: a fascinating thing.
Speaker 18: It's it's like a weird muscle. It's like it's if
Speaker 18: sometimes people know how to move their eyebrows up and
Speaker 18: down and some people don't. You either like know how
Speaker 18: to use that muscle or you don't.
Speaker 5: Know how to use that muscle.
Speaker 2: Mm hmm, I'm move I believe me, I'm moving my
Speaker 2: eyebrows up and down during this call.
Speaker 18: WHA Like, but can you do it like one time
Speaker 18: in another Like it's like weird to control those different
Speaker 18: muscles and like and like I can queef on demand.
Speaker 18: I can also sometimes on demand, but like I have
Speaker 18: to be in the right position, so maybe you have
Speaker 18: to like experiment with that.
Speaker 1: You know, I appreciate you telling this story. I do
Speaker 1: of one thing. Uh, this ability to queef on demand?
Speaker 1: Has it been helpful for you in any practical sense?
Speaker 1: Has you have you gotten any money from this. Have
Speaker 1: you gotten any fame? Like, what has it really done
Speaker 1: for you? Empirically?
Speaker 18: It hasn't really done anything great. I mean I had
Speaker 18: a tampon stuck in. Yeah, it's like a weird like
Speaker 18: party trick, Like, hey, guys.
Speaker 17: Guess what I could do.
Speaker 1: At a certain kind of party? Can you do it
Speaker 1: on the call here?
Speaker 9: Yeah?
Speaker 18: Well, like good friends, I don't think I can. I
Speaker 18: have an iud and and like, I'm so nervous, but
Speaker 18: I'll pop it out one day.
Speaker 4: So I need to practice my muscles again, just hypothetically asking.
Speaker 1: I was a requesting.
Speaker 18: I want to, but I don't think I could.
Speaker 1: Well, Lauren, uh, listen, call back in another time, whenever
Speaker 1: you whenever you want to. And you know, if you
Speaker 1: if you feel like you feel like updating us on this,
Speaker 1: if you've found a way to make this like a
Speaker 1: business somehow.
Speaker 2: Turn out everything's about money, something's about just having fun.
Speaker 1: But it could be there's whole website still dedicated to this.
Speaker 1: I've heard of those.
Speaker 18: I'm not really that kind of person. Should you want
Speaker 18: to hear another weird vagina story?
Speaker 1: Sure are right.
Speaker 18: So one time I was a little drunk, I'm watching
Speaker 18: the race I'm trimming my tubes with scissors. I'm not looking.
Speaker 18: I'm hunched, like over the trash can and Smith, I
Speaker 18: cut a piece of my laby off.
Speaker 1: I is that? Did that happen before or after you
Speaker 1: gained the queafing powers? Because maybe that is the secret
Speaker 1: somehow to the abilities that you've gained.
Speaker 2: Did it hurt.
Speaker 15: It?
Speaker 18: It didn't hurt Right when I did it, I was
Speaker 18: kind of like, holy shit, that just fucking happened. So
Speaker 18: it happened, and then my husband was, well, actually it
Speaker 18: didn't like cut off all the way. I sliced it,
Speaker 18: and my husband like pinched the lips back to where
Speaker 18: it was supposed to be.
Speaker 1: By the way, By the way, this officially makes you Jewish?
Speaker 17: How does that make me jewish?
Speaker 1: He doesn't know what he's talking about. Anything else you
Speaker 1: want to say to the people of the computer before
Speaker 1: we go, Lauren, thank.
Speaker 11: You for taking my call.
Speaker 18: You guys are so funny to be around, and I
Speaker 18: aspire to be like you one day. Vile Jack oh Man.
Speaker 1: Thank you, Lauren. I appreciate that. I'll talk to you soon,
Speaker 1: all right, talk to you later, man. I aspire to
Speaker 1: be like you. I want to queaf a ping, pung
Speaker 1: ball out of my vagina. That could be fun. Sure, Hi, Hello,
Speaker 1: how are you?
Speaker 14: Oh?
Speaker 8: I'm doing good man?
Speaker 6: How are you?
Speaker 1: I'm hanging in there? Your name is uh Bless twenty
Speaker 1: two from Marilynd's how's it hanging man? How can we
Speaker 1: get you to that?
Speaker 8: It's so basically like I'm moving away this year. I
Speaker 8: got into college and like I'm excited and everything, but
Speaker 8: I'm concerned about dating and like sex and all the
Speaker 8: other stuff because I I have I have a micro penis.
Speaker 8: So it's just it's just difficult, Like I have a
Speaker 8: lot of shame about it, and I just I wanted
Speaker 8: to know if you guys could give me any advice
Speaker 8: or like you know, recommendations, you know, moving forward in
Speaker 8: my life to kind of overcome this insecurity.
Speaker 1: Well, uh, there are other ways to uh please women.
Speaker 2: Have you are you a virgin?
Speaker 8: I mean technically yes, Like yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2: Let me say something. Sexual intercourse is of is just
Speaker 2: a little part of a human being's life. Some people,
Speaker 2: it's not. Some people it's all they can think about.
Speaker 2: Some people that they're obsessed with it and they can't
Speaker 2: do anything. But you know, a well rounded person, it's
Speaker 2: not the it's not it shouldn't be your You're the
Speaker 2: only thing that that you worry about or think about,
Speaker 2: or the only thing that gives you pleasure. Ah, but
Speaker 2: I don't know know how much I'm not I don't
Speaker 2: know enough about the anatomy to know how this might
Speaker 2: prohibit you from performing sexually?
Speaker 1: Can you?
Speaker 2: I don't know enough of what you when you say micropeds,
Speaker 2: I don't know if you're being Is that a clinical
Speaker 2: term or is that a is that just like are
Speaker 2: you just just.
Speaker 1: So yeah, so.
Speaker 8: Under under like two and a half inches erect?
Speaker 2: Well, but but you can you can you can uh
Speaker 2: become erect and you can come.
Speaker 8: Yes, yeah I can, so you can.
Speaker 2: You're your sexual organs work properly. They're just not to
Speaker 2: the dimensions that are more that are that are considered
Speaker 2: normal in society at these days.
Speaker 8: Exactly exactly.
Speaker 1: The common talking point on this.
Speaker 2: And please because I don't know the common talk like,
Speaker 2: I don't I really don't know because I'm out of
Speaker 2: the game.
Speaker 1: You know what I mean is you know, if you
Speaker 1: are not able to perform very well in traditional sexual intercourse,
Speaker 1: there is the the avenue of oral sexual intercourse. Uh,
Speaker 1: there are there's guys, you know, there's guides on the internets.
Speaker 2: Yeah, have you done have you looked into the into
Speaker 2: this on the internet? Like micro penis?
Speaker 1: Uh? Dating?
Speaker 2: Like see what what do they say?
Speaker 8: There's a lot of forums and stuff like you get
Speaker 8: a lot of support on on it. But yeah, a
Speaker 8: lot of the guys on there are kind of fatalistic
Speaker 8: about it, like it's like, yeah, so it's not it's
Speaker 8: not very encouraging for me to go online, so I
Speaker 8: try to ignore it a bit.
Speaker 2: Well, no one knows what you've got between your legs
Speaker 2: unless you want them to know, right, So there's that.
Speaker 2: You don't have to walk around thinking everybody knows your situation.
Speaker 10: Uh.
Speaker 2: But if you're gonna if you like some girl and
Speaker 2: she seems to like you, I would be you know,
Speaker 2: it's gonna come up talk about it. Uh boy, I
Speaker 2: don't know, man, I feel I feel a little.
Speaker 1: Uh.
Speaker 2: I don't want to just give you a flippant joke
Speaker 2: answer or anything like that. But but you're it's not
Speaker 2: your it's not your identity, it's not who you are.
Speaker 1: Can can I want? I want to ask you is
Speaker 1: and you give me the truthful answer to this question?
Speaker 1: How important. Is sex to you?
Speaker 8: Very very important? I like, yeah, I really like I
Speaker 8: just I see it. There's something to a tame, Like
Speaker 8: I think I've been into it since I was like
Speaker 8: really young. I think that I've been more sexual than
Speaker 8: other people. And it's like if I'm not able to
Speaker 8: please my partner like it really yeah, I think it
Speaker 8: really affects like how I feel about myself and whatnot.
Speaker 8: But I feel it's.
Speaker 2: Interesting because it seems like you're setting yourself up for
Speaker 2: for uh, you know, you're setting your expectations too high,
Speaker 2: like on purpose almost.
Speaker 1: How do you how do you feel like he's setting
Speaker 1: his expectations high?
Speaker 2: Well, uh, if you if you place a great amount
Speaker 2: of importance on performing sexually, knowing the condition you have
Speaker 2: and knowing there doesn't seem to be anything you can
Speaker 2: do about it unless there are additional aids like uh,
Speaker 2: you know, uh, what do you call them? The dildos vibrators?
Speaker 2: You know, unless you want to go that route, you
Speaker 2: are creating a scenario where you're going to disappoint yourself
Speaker 2: and the other person.
Speaker 1: Right right, So don't do that. And also there's a
Speaker 1: thing I really strongly believe just by the sheer volume
Speaker 1: of people that every kind of person exists, so they're
Speaker 1: and the great thing about the relationship issues is you
Speaker 1: only need to find one this kind of every kind
Speaker 1: of person there does exist, by there has to there.
Speaker 2: Has you a good looking Are you a true I mean,
Speaker 2: do you consider yourself a good looking guy?
Speaker 8: Not really? Like, oh I think I think that like
Speaker 8: that could just be like low self esteem, Like I'm
Speaker 8: not sure. I don't think like sometimes like some sometimes,
Speaker 8: but I don't think so personal.
Speaker 1: Who do you look like? Uh, give like a celebrity
Speaker 1: comparison or somebody that maybe we would know that we
Speaker 1: can kind of give a get a parameter.
Speaker 8: You guys know, Like do you guys know Travis Smiley?
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, I remember Travis Smiley. He was Tavis Smiley,
Speaker 2: Tavis have a smiley. He was like yeah, he was
Speaker 2: like a late night talk show host. It was like
Speaker 2: a serious interview show.
Speaker 1: Okay, I've seen I've.
Speaker 8: Heard the Smiley and like our Seniel Hall, like, but.
Speaker 2: Okay, you're skinny. Yeah, he's a good looking guy.
Speaker 1: I'm looking him up right now. He's not He's not
Speaker 1: a bad looking guy. Not a bad look. Senel Hall
Speaker 1: is not a bad looking guy. Either well, I first
Speaker 1: of all, I think.
Speaker 8: Then that's another too, is like I'm black, and I
Speaker 8: think that people expect like the opposite.
Speaker 2: There's a stereotype there associated with well it would be
Speaker 2: a pleasant surprise for somebody.
Speaker 1: Maybe maybe they're worried about it's true, but.
Speaker 2: I do think at your age it's natural to have
Speaker 2: sort of uh, you know, preoccupation with sex, but it
Speaker 2: definitely diminishes over time as your hormones change. And try
Speaker 2: to put your sexual life in perspective of not making
Speaker 2: it the only thing that you are trying to, you know,
Speaker 2: find your enjoyment out of like this mortal life, and
Speaker 2: you know, don't just shut the door on the idea
Speaker 2: that maybe, like you said, there's somebody out there.
Speaker 1: That there's so many, so many people, so many people,
Speaker 1: you'll you there exists there is a girl out there
Speaker 1: who doesn't care about the micro penis. Even if most
Speaker 1: wood might care, that doesn't even doesn't matter because once
Speaker 1: you find the one that doesn't.
Speaker 2: You know, and let me say, you're also a product
Speaker 2: of society, where why are we making small dick jokes
Speaker 2: like I'm not. But of course that's that's like the
Speaker 2: easiest it's on TV all the time.
Speaker 1: You grew up with it.
Speaker 2: I'm sure you grew up with it. Jokes about your
Speaker 2: penis size. It's it's ingrained in our culture and it
Speaker 2: and this is a good example of how damaging or
Speaker 2: hurtful that can be. You got a guy out there
Speaker 2: that has a real condition and it's it's causing you, uh,
Speaker 2: you know, stress. So this is a larger concern. But uh,
Speaker 2: there's nothing wrong with somebody having a small penis or
Speaker 2: a big penis whatever.
Speaker 1: It's just the way you are, how you feel. I'm blessed.
Speaker 8: Yeah, I actually like that advice, Like say, your expectation
Speaker 8: is properly.
Speaker 2: At That's not something that you can just do automatically.
Speaker 2: Takes a long time, it takes a little work, and
Speaker 2: and it doesn't happen right away. So but just keep
Speaker 2: that in the back of your head and try to
Speaker 2: breathe and meditate and eat healthy and live live, try
Speaker 2: to live a balanced life.
Speaker 1: Blessed. Is there anything else you want to say to me?
Speaker 1: Or Tim or God? Are the people of the computer
Speaker 1: before we go?
Speaker 8: I love you guys, man, You guys are cool.
Speaker 9: Bro.
Speaker 8: I love everyone. I hope everyone has like a good life.
Speaker 8: And ship and yeah, be nice to people.
Speaker 1: Thank you, blessed, appreciate you calling man, take care all
Speaker 1: right bye? Are you horny in general? Yeah? In general?
Speaker 2: I mean like no, not not not to a place
Speaker 2: where it's a problem, you know, or I mean just normal.
Speaker 2: I feel fairly fairly normal, if maybe a little under horny.
Speaker 1: Underhorny is is that? Have you always kind of been?
Speaker 2: Yeah, I've never been much of a I never I
Speaker 2: was never like that was never my prime focus.
Speaker 1: What about not even like with dating and stuff, but
Speaker 1: what about like how often do you masturbate? Mm hmm.
Speaker 2: Maybe once or twice a week.
Speaker 1: That's pretty pretty, that's pretty not that's that's fair. I
Speaker 1: would I think that's far below average.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's it's more uh yeah, I again, I I uh,
Speaker 2: there's things I just there's I love laughing.
Speaker 1: Laughing is the best.
Speaker 2: No, I don't know, yeah, just something I'm still fairly
Speaker 2: private and guarded about my that part of my life.
Speaker 2: But yeah, there's you know, there's certainly people that, uh
Speaker 2: that's what they got on their brain.
Speaker 1: Sure, not so much me. Okay, I don't know if
Speaker 1: that was an uncomfortable thing to ask you, sure of course.
Speaker 2: But I'm a little prudish or a little puritan in
Speaker 2: the discussion of the subject in general.
Speaker 6: You know, you.
Speaker 1: Understand why I would not think that, right, well, because
Speaker 1: you I mean, a lot of the stuff you make
Speaker 1: is like sex related and very but it's like.
Speaker 2: It's like the most grotesque version of it, or you know,
Speaker 2: it's not it's a mockery of sexual obsession. Interesting, it's
Speaker 2: not a it's not a huge it's not a genuine expression.
Speaker 2: I'm not like, I don't know who, you know, making
Speaker 2: some kind of porno. Yeah, we're making fun of that.
Speaker 2: That making fun of the sex obsession.
Speaker 1: Yeah, Okay, I.
Speaker 2: Think so now, And that wasn't always my bag anyway.
Speaker 1: No if I asked us yet, But do you have vices?
Speaker 1: Do you have like what do you do? You do
Speaker 1: anything that you consider like.
Speaker 2: Well, I've admitted to gummies at night to sleep, mushrooms,
Speaker 2: gummies at night, mushrooms. Uh. I mean, you know, I've
Speaker 2: lost a lot of weight and yeah, and I'm very
Speaker 2: proud of that and very happy with that feeling of
Speaker 2: not of dropping some pounds. I would say, I have
Speaker 2: you know, I've loved sweets, I love chocolates and Reese's Piece.
Speaker 2: Who doesn't doesn't But I could go nuts on that
Speaker 2: stuff like e t Yeah, I could. We when we
Speaker 2: were shooting Awesome show, we would like bowlfuls of Reese's pieces,
Speaker 2: bowlfuls and so you know, I've I've always had issues
Speaker 2: with with overeating and but that's really it.
Speaker 1: I don't drink that much. I go through.
Speaker 2: Uh, you know, there's certain if I'm on tour or
Speaker 2: you know, I might drink more than I would be
Speaker 2: if I if I was at home a couple of beers.
Speaker 2: But yeah, I'm pretty uh, pretty boring in that respect.
Speaker 1: It's funny to think that you get it. A lot
Speaker 1: of like people are like, oh, you must have been
Speaker 1: on drugs doing this stuff. But it wasn't try as
Speaker 1: Reese's Pieces.
Speaker 2: It was sugar, pure sugar. I drink coffee in the morning.
Speaker 1: Okay, you put cream in it? Nope, black. I have
Speaker 1: to know it that.
Speaker 2: I do have office hours tomorrow morning. By the way,
Speaker 2: I should plug that my birthday episode of Office Hours.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, yeah, wait, do you want to plug at
Speaker 1: the ender? I plug right now? What do you prefer?
Speaker 1: You plug right now? I do plug. We have someone
Speaker 1: on the phone. Oh yeah, let's plug to them. Who's
Speaker 1: on the call?
Speaker 10: Hello?
Speaker 2: Val?
Speaker 1: How are you Val?
Speaker 17: I'm doing all right?
Speaker 19: How are you guys?
Speaker 2: Pretty good? I just want to let you know I do.
Speaker 2: I do my own podcast Thursday Mornings, which is tomorrow
Speaker 2: here in America. Uh, and that would be uh on
Speaker 2: my YouTube channel YouTube dot com slash Tim Heideker. You
Speaker 2: can see my name there. I think there's a link.
Speaker 2: And that's really a similar show call in show we've got,
Speaker 2: you know, it's a little bit more no offense. It's
Speaker 2: you were on the show, you had a good time.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I have a good time.
Speaker 2: We have guests come in, we take calls, and it's
Speaker 2: it's it's a little lighter than this show. It's not
Speaker 2: we don't get into some of the dark stuff. Sure,
Speaker 2: but that's happening. And then I'm going to be touring
Speaker 2: over there in the UK and Europe in March.
Speaker 1: Where where in the UK? Everywhere?
Speaker 2: London, Sheffield, Brighton, Nottingham, Galway, Ireland and Dublin and everywhere
Speaker 2: if you can find that at Tim Heidiker dot com
Speaker 2: slash live. So was this vow.
Speaker 17: Vow?
Speaker 2: Can you make it out to any of those shows
Speaker 2: in the UK?
Speaker 13: I live in the US, but I would love to
Speaker 13: travel to the UK to come see you.
Speaker 2: All right, well we can arrange something.
Speaker 1: Are you doing any tour dates domestically this year?
Speaker 2: No tour dates domestically can be announced at this moment. Okay,
Speaker 2: got it, got it, But I'm hoping to later.
Speaker 1: In the year. Yes, yeah, you're sang any merch these days?
Speaker 1: Where can they buy merch?
Speaker 2: Well, the merch department is open and that's at the
Speaker 2: website as well.
Speaker 1: Okay, is that Tim hideker dot com slash shop.
Speaker 2: There'll be a you know, I believe so Okay, so
Speaker 2: val If you want to get a first class plane
Speaker 2: ticket on British Airways to London, you're gonna want to
Speaker 2: land around March fourteenth to get settled in and then
Speaker 2: see me later in the month.
Speaker 17: Hiday.
Speaker 13: I can make a cover.
Speaker 1: Thank you. Do you have any other questions about any
Speaker 1: of Tim's upcoming projects? Are current things that going on?
Speaker 2: She's got her own questions.
Speaker 17: I don't, but I will for sure tune into his
Speaker 17: show tomorrow morning.
Speaker 1: You should, You should. I did do office hours. It's fun.
Speaker 1: I'm glad that I was when I was on one
Speaker 1: thing that was as you guys, were talking about a
Speaker 1: band that I didn't know what the band was, but
Speaker 1: then you started talking about Eyes Wide Shut, and I
Speaker 1: was like, I can participate in this conversation because yeah,
Speaker 1: scene as we.
Speaker 2: Somebody told me that I got the timeline of that
Speaker 2: movie wrong. Oh oh, it was an actual extra day.
Speaker 2: I did a whole thing about how that whole movie
Speaker 2: takes place over two days.
Speaker 1: I was thinking that too, but you were in this
Speaker 1: bit of like it was just one day and it was.
Speaker 1: It was funny.
Speaker 2: So was I an influence on you at all in
Speaker 2: your life?
Speaker 1: Yeah? I have it heavily. I was gonna I was.
Speaker 1: I was thinking. I was like, I'm playing it cool,
Speaker 1: but I'm gonna gush over you at the Yeah, No,
Speaker 1: I saw you. I saw you at the Lincoln Theater
Speaker 1: in Washington, d C. With my best friend Ryan when
Speaker 1: I was fourteen years old. That's wild. I saw you
Speaker 1: on the the tim and Eric and Brule.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it was a great tour with piano backstage. I
Speaker 2: enjoyed the piano backstage at the Lincoln Theater. Uh, that's terrific.
Speaker 14: Man.
Speaker 1: Ten years old. Then I saw you when you were
Speaker 1: doing you were showing like the new episode of bedtime stories.
Speaker 1: I've seen three times. Okay, yeah, great shows. Great, I
Speaker 1: put on a great show on a great show. I
Speaker 1: haven't seen you. I've seen your the Special. Yeah, but
Speaker 1: I haven't seen I haven't gotten the chance to see
Speaker 1: just You live doing the band that.
Speaker 2: The band is fantastic. They're unbelievable musicians and uh, I
Speaker 2: love playing with them so much. I'm having so much fun,
Speaker 2: so much joy playing music with this group. And uh,
Speaker 2: play all my songs. There's some funny ones in there,
Speaker 2: there's some sad ones in there. I get people to
Speaker 2: cry into and uh, but man, it's a.
Speaker 1: Great album where you have a tear drop going what
Speaker 1: the broken hearted do? I love that album? Thank you? Yeah.
Speaker 2: I like writing sad songs. They're they're very cathartic and uh,
Speaker 2: and they're the kind of songs I would want to
Speaker 2: listen to.
Speaker 1: You know, I appreciate the rain. I don't want to.
Speaker 1: I don't want to.
Speaker 2: I don't want to sit there and listen to sae
Speaker 2: uh break good times?
Speaker 1: Come on? What about the bad times? Who's saying about those?
Speaker 1: Come on?
Speaker 2: Give me something to drink my beer with, you know,
Speaker 2: crying my beer anyway?
Speaker 1: Foul? Yes, I think that show. You did Beef House too,
Speaker 1: that was good. Beef House was great. Canceled You want
Speaker 1: to hear something kind of is what I So. Before
Speaker 1: I did this, I worked in the social media department
Speaker 1: at Adult Swim and that one of my jobs was
Speaker 1: to watch every episode of Beef House and make and
Speaker 1: make gifts of it. Oh well those are those are
Speaker 1: everywhere now, There's everywhere now. And I saw you made
Speaker 1: a tweet that had a gift in it that I made,
Speaker 1: and I was like, hell, yeah, Timmy.
Speaker 2: Thanks for the work, Thanks for the great work. But
Speaker 2: that show apparently is so useless to them that you
Speaker 2: it does not exist anywhere on the they.
Speaker 1: Got I think it got got a bunch of shows
Speaker 1: cut in.
Speaker 2: The merger, the big HBO Max. We don't want to talk,
Speaker 2: We don't want to have to touch. These people out
Speaker 2: there don't want to talk hear about our show biz.
Speaker 1: So sure, I don't want to, you know, bring any
Speaker 1: of that up.
Speaker 2: But it's it's terrible to that show is just I
Speaker 2: don't know where you you would even see it.
Speaker 1: My favorite thing of yours, bedtime Stories.
Speaker 2: Very proud of that show. Yeah, uh yeah that that
Speaker 2: that's it gets pretty dark. We very we're very proud
Speaker 2: of making because we had made an awesome show and
Speaker 2: it's it obviously intentionally looks terrible, looks like cable act.
Speaker 2: And then this was the complete thing, and this was like,
Speaker 2: let's do let's do something that looks great cinematically, and
Speaker 2: it was very hard to do that on a small budget,
Speaker 2: but we got you know, there's an episode toes.
Speaker 1: Yeah, Bobby and Kirk.
Speaker 2: And what's his name? Uh, m Emmett, emmett Wall.
Speaker 1: I show everything my like anytime I'm like introducing someone
Speaker 1: to your universe, I show them whole holes.
Speaker 2: That's that came out really good too.
Speaker 1: Yeah, thank you, Well, Val, is there anything else you
Speaker 1: want to say to the people of the computer before
Speaker 1: we go?
Speaker 3: Well?
Speaker 13: Can I tell a joke?
Speaker 1: Yeah? Of course.
Speaker 13: Do you guys know where they sell the bacon eat or.
Speaker 1: Where? Well, I'm asking, uh, Wendy's fuck you, I know
Speaker 1: where're gonna do Wendy's.
Speaker 17: Nuts going in your mouth? You guys didn't let me talk.
Speaker 1: It says here that you okay, actually this is kind
Speaker 1: of fast, good joke. It says here. It says here
Speaker 1: that you were reported to an organization known as the USPF,
Speaker 1: which is an organization that governs horses, and you still
Speaker 1: have to work closely with the person who reported you. Yes,
Speaker 1: and why were you reported by the horse people?
Speaker 13: So I didn't do anything to the horses.
Speaker 17: It's that the horse sport is a very rich fort,
Speaker 17: like anyone that's good is a billionaire basically, and so
Speaker 17: I can't afford it unless I work for someone. But
Speaker 17: now that I'm over.
Speaker 13: Eighteen, working for someone in.
Speaker 17: Exchange, like working for free in exchange for not being
Speaker 17: billed for.
Speaker 9: Training, is against the rules. Technically I have to be
Speaker 9: a professional.
Speaker 13: So I was reported, but that's not where my main
Speaker 13: issue lies. My main issue lies with the girl that
Speaker 13: reported me. I work very closely with, Like we go
Speaker 13: to horse shows and we lived together for like one
Speaker 13: to two to three weeks at a time in a
Speaker 13: random city in the US. And I'm pretty positive she's
Speaker 13: on the autism spectrum and I've always been the nice
Speaker 13: one to her, but now she's wronged me, and I
Speaker 13: just I don't know how to proceed with her.
Speaker 1: M Do you have any thoughts not on this one?
Speaker 5: No?
Speaker 1: Okay, well I have a little thing, but it feels
Speaker 1: too It feels moralist. But I could say it. You're like,
Speaker 1: all right, so you're the only one that was nice
Speaker 1: to this girl, and now she has reported you when
Speaker 1: you are kind of over here like, hey, I was
Speaker 1: the only one i'd like stuck up for you, and
Speaker 1: everyone's making fun of you, and now you're throwing me
Speaker 1: into the bus like that.
Speaker 9: Is that?
Speaker 1: It's how you're feeling.
Speaker 17: Well because now I have to pay back all the
Speaker 17: prize money I've won, which is a couple thousand dollars.
Speaker 1: Okay, there's a financial thing here.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I feel like tonight I've been extremely magnanimous with
Speaker 2: my whatever insights I have, that's what a word, whatever
Speaker 2: help I can offer, I've been pretty I think it's
Speaker 2: doing the best I can have. It's been, it's been
Speaker 2: choppy waters. There's been people with real problems. There's been
Speaker 2: there's been I think I hit my wall with her,
Speaker 2: just I don't know why. I don't think your problems
Speaker 2: less less significant somebody else's problem. I just started to
Speaker 2: kind of zone out on that one, and I just
Speaker 2: don't know what I could possibly say because I don't
Speaker 2: know enough. I can't muster up the concern happened, and
Speaker 2: I apologize val this happens to me, and she was
Speaker 2: going to come to my show in London. She's still
Speaker 2: gonna come. She's still gonna come.
Speaker 1: Uh well, actually I don't know she now she has
Speaker 1: now she's in debt, she's probably already spent the prize money.
Speaker 1: This happens to me every stream. I usually Actually the
Speaker 1: way I do my stream is I go until I
Speaker 1: notice that I'm not paying attention.
Speaker 2: To people anymore. I hit that moment.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I think this is the thing that happens, says
Speaker 1: I get.
Speaker 2: I'm like, I don't know horses. It seems like, oh,
Speaker 2: why would you get involved in horses at all? No offense, No,
Speaker 2: definitely want to come to the show.
Speaker 1: Yeah, let them.
Speaker 2: Free, let them turn into wild horses and get on
Speaker 2: with yourself.
Speaker 1: Yeah maybe, Uh this this is an opportunity for you
Speaker 1: to explore new hobbies. Thank you, le well there is
Speaker 1: there anything else? WHENNA say to the people of the
Speaker 1: computer before we go, I love you guys, Love you
Speaker 1: to you man peace.
Speaker 2: See you in London.
Speaker 9: Yeah, see you.
Speaker 1: How are you feeling? I'm good.
Speaker 2: I might have to go soon.
Speaker 1: Sure, what time is it? It's two hours?
Speaker 4: Did it?
Speaker 1: It's good?
Speaker 2: I mean I genuinely love this.
Speaker 1: I could do it.
Speaker 10: Man.
Speaker 2: I hope I'm not. I hope the audience does. I
Speaker 2: have no idea people could be mad for me because
Speaker 2: they truly love you. Well, now that you said that,
Speaker 2: it makes me feel like you know, they don't like it.
Speaker 1: No, no, no, they're stoked about that. Well for I
Speaker 1: was well, no I said that, because you know, no, I.
Speaker 2: Love you and they want you, and I feel I
Speaker 2: hope I haven't been hogging the air. Take another call, Okay,
Speaker 2: then I'll get out of here.
Speaker 1: Okay, let's sty'll do one more.
Speaker 2: Poor children, tell me.
Speaker 1: If anything, tell me if anything, I.
Speaker 2: Can't really read that my eyes are that's the other thing,
Speaker 2: lyle might get all my eyes are going.
Speaker 9: Yeah.
Speaker 2: I had perfect vision my whole life. And as people
Speaker 2: have said, when you hit forty you start to need glasses.
Speaker 2: And it's happening to me.
Speaker 1: Glad, are we going to do contacts? Just like reading?
Speaker 2: I get these like readers at Target. You know, they're
Speaker 2: just cheapies that I can that for reading and for
Speaker 2: like typing on the computer.
Speaker 1: Do you know who mister beast is. I heard about this.
Speaker 1: He just cured a thousand blind people. Yeah, did he
Speaker 1: really though, well he paid someone else to do it, sure,
Speaker 1: like do it? Sure? Yeah? Good for him.
Speaker 2: I don't know is it a controversy.
Speaker 1: What I mean? I think people are like, why do
Speaker 1: you need to pay a billion dollars to get to
Speaker 1: not be sure?
Speaker 2: But yeah, I get that. That's the that's kind of
Speaker 2: the leftist of which I am. One perspective is when
Speaker 2: you when you do these charitable things, it it's a
Speaker 2: it becomes a smoke screen for the larger injustices happening
Speaker 2: in society and these feel good stories of there's always
Speaker 2: these feel good stories that when you look into the
Speaker 2: under the under the hood a little bit, you're like, well,
Speaker 2: this is actually just reminding us how dystopian and horrible.
Speaker 1: Yeah, we've created.
Speaker 2: What a horrible society We've created Like those things where
Speaker 2: you've contests to win, Like there's one in England where
Speaker 2: it was a contest and the prize was that they
Speaker 2: were going to pay your gas bills or something for.
Speaker 1: The month, and it's sort of like it comes a
Speaker 1: little to stoping. Okay, anyways, I got this. This one's
Speaker 1: uh a career y thing. There's some career advice.
Speaker 2: He's not from New Jersey.
Speaker 1: Is he he's from New Jersey? Do you have a
Speaker 1: thing another?
Speaker 2: No, let's talk to him. I just, I'm I'm just
Speaker 2: I'm at my wits end with these Jersey kids. I
Speaker 2: can't do Jersey.
Speaker 9: What is it?
Speaker 5: Who is it?
Speaker 1: Hello? Hello, Billy?
Speaker 9: Hi?
Speaker 6: What's going on? How's it going?
Speaker 2: What are you in Jersey?
Speaker 10: Now?
Speaker 6: I'm enjoyed whatever the fuck that I'm enjoyed.
Speaker 1: What swept part north south central the.
Speaker 6: Beach ish kind of area like your.
Speaker 1: Like point pleasantness, wild wild wood.
Speaker 6: Around there.
Speaker 2: Sure, Okay, you don't want to talk about where you live.
Speaker 1: I get it. I'm familiar with. It's where all the
Speaker 1: Temple University kids would go on their summer vacation. Yeah,
Speaker 1: which is so.
Speaker 6: Help you actually want to anyway? Yeah, having some career
Speaker 6: questions right now. I feel bad though, because Tim, if
Speaker 6: you're like tired, you know, and it's kind of like
Speaker 6: heavy topic, I can keep it light something else I
Speaker 6: don't know.
Speaker 1: No, no, good, let me.
Speaker 2: Let's end on a heavy note with.
Speaker 1: Me, please, as dark as you could possibly get.
Speaker 8: All right?
Speaker 6: So, anyway, graduated from school in twenty twenty one and
Speaker 6: then got a job, got fired from that job, went
Speaker 6: to a therapy program to kind of like figure out
Speaker 6: what's going on with my head. And during that time,
Speaker 6: I wrote a sort like a graphic novel. I wrote
Speaker 6: a like you say, it's like a storyboard, but it's
Speaker 6: like a full length book sort of. I don't know
Speaker 6: the proper language to describe it, but it's like I
Speaker 6: wrote an actual novel, write whatever, comic book, but it's
Speaker 6: like two hundred plus pages or whatever. And I'm now
Speaker 6: in twenty twenty three trying to get myself back into
Speaker 6: my actual technical career, which is electrical work. So yeah, yeah,
Speaker 6: I'm trying to get back into that.
Speaker 2: And well, what's the how can we help?
Speaker 6: I don't know, uh, just looking for some advice for
Speaker 6: somebody who's also like trying to uh contact agents, and
Speaker 6: you know what. To be honest with you, I don't
Speaker 6: really think I'm gonna get much help from you guys,
Speaker 6: even though you know you're involved with the industry as
Speaker 6: far as that goes.
Speaker 2: Because you're a you're a pragmatic guy, you're a realist.
Speaker 2: Well are you proud of what you what you wrote?
Speaker 5: Oh?
Speaker 6: Fuck yeah, I mean I wrote a uh means a lot.
Speaker 2: What do you think you think it's great.
Speaker 14: I like it.
Speaker 6: I mean I don't know if it's great.
Speaker 2: I think what's the genre?
Speaker 6: Uh, it's it's literary fiction. And uh it's like, actually,
Speaker 6: I can't even think of the genre because it's hard
Speaker 6: to place it. And that's like one of the first
Speaker 6: things that they say you have to do is figure
Speaker 6: out what genre your uh your book is. But it's
Speaker 6: about a guy guy about a guy who's dealing with depression,
Speaker 6: and it takes place about a year after he graduates
Speaker 6: from school trying to get his book published. He can't
Speaker 6: get it published, and he falls into a depression. And
Speaker 6: it's about like the five months after that year that
Speaker 6: he kind of goes into dealing with figuring out how
Speaker 6: the solved, not really solved, but just kind of maintain
Speaker 6: himself as he's going through life, dealing with his feelings
Speaker 6: of maybe like inadequacy or uh just insecurity about his writing,
Speaker 6: like he's afraid to start writing again because he's not
Speaker 6: sure whether or not whether it'll actually go anywhere.
Speaker 2: Sounds great, I mean, it does, sounds compelling and from
Speaker 2: from your own personal story clearly, Uh, it's from the heart.
Speaker 1: I feel like nowadays, the push to uh get like
Speaker 1: a traditional like whether it's a fucking TV show or
Speaker 1: a book or whatever. The days of mother, may I
Speaker 1: make this and put it out into the universe are
Speaker 1: kind of gone, you know. There's that there's there's so
Speaker 1: many different ways to promote and publish the thing that,
Speaker 1: especially if it's like something you can lack, you don't
Speaker 1: even need I don't know if you need money necessarily
Speaker 1: to like maybe to make physical copies, but you know,
Speaker 1: to produce the work on digital or whatever it is.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, I don't I know that world of graphic novels.
Speaker 2: I'm sorry I interrupt. I was just gonna say I
Speaker 2: don't know the world of graphic novels at all, so
Speaker 2: I wouldn't even know where to point you. Uh, but
Speaker 2: my sister actually writes young adult novels. Oh cool, And
Speaker 2: she's been doing it for many years. But she started
Speaker 2: just by doing it and and self publishing you can
Speaker 2: publish on Amazon, you know, And she just kept doing
Speaker 2: it and kept doing it and finally started maybe make
Speaker 2: contacts and connected with other people, and now she's like
Speaker 2: really doing it and she does like she writes these
Speaker 2: like romance novels that go up on Amazon. The ebooks
Speaker 2: Kindle and she maybe it's her full time job and
Speaker 2: she pumps them out. So it sounds like you have
Speaker 2: something in you that wants to get out. And I
Speaker 2: would keep doing it and keep exploring. Read all the
Speaker 2: forums and all this how to publish a cell a
Speaker 2: graphic novel? Like, You're right, the information is out there.
Speaker 2: It's very much more doable now than ever before to
Speaker 2: publish your on your own, to just independently distribute or
Speaker 2: you know, find the right people to send it to.
Speaker 2: I think you just need to start digging into that.
Speaker 2: That's what I did.
Speaker 6: That's what I've been sending it out to different literary agents,
Speaker 6: just to like see what they think as far as
Speaker 6: like representing me. And I think the one thing that
Speaker 6: holds me back from self publishing is the fact that
Speaker 6: I'm not an illustrator myself, so I can't actually draw
Speaker 6: these pages that I need to get.
Speaker 1: Yeah, somebody else, you can hook up with someone who
Speaker 1: does exactly. Yeah, I mean you started, you you sent
Speaker 1: like fucking like tapes around to people and show right.
Speaker 2: Yeah, but we're not we're talking about him. But yeah,
Speaker 2: can you find somebody that can draw?
Speaker 6: I mean I found an illustrator off of What's upwork
Speaker 6: dot com. Like they do they offer uh A. They
Speaker 6: facilitate an interface between you and like other UH artists
Speaker 6: or graphic designers or anything that you really need to
Speaker 6: get done that has to be done professionally, you can
Speaker 6: get you can find somebody that can help you out
Speaker 6: on that website. And I found somebody, but the problem
Speaker 6: is that it's her work is pretty costly. So I
Speaker 6: started a Kickstarter which ended on January twenty seventh. I
Speaker 6: got like a dollar for it, so that was kind
Speaker 6: of like a you know, like a noga almost. But
Speaker 6: I'm thinking about like starting up again, like after I
Speaker 6: do some smart research as far as like trying to
Speaker 6: get a base and foundation, as far as like a
Speaker 6: following of people that are interested and then you know,
Speaker 6: getting more worried out about it and having people like
Speaker 6: the call screener she was telling me that I could
Speaker 6: I like she was trying to give me a tip
Speaker 6: as far as what I could do, and I can't
Speaker 6: really remember it now because well, well.
Speaker 1: Well, Billy, I think I think you're on the right
Speaker 1: track with this stuff. Man. It seems like you're you're.
Speaker 2: You know, yeah, I bet if you kept pushing at this.
Speaker 2: You could find somebody that you don't have to pay.
Speaker 2: You could just say, hey, you want to be a
Speaker 2: partner on this. You know, there's a lot of talented
Speaker 2: artists out there, and it doesn't cost like drawing is
Speaker 2: aside from pen and paper, you know, there's no costs involved.
Speaker 2: So there might be a young college kid somebody coming
Speaker 2: out of like trying to build their portfolio that would say, hey,
Speaker 2: I'll do the first ten pages of this thing, and
Speaker 2: that's enough to show. You know, if they don't have
Speaker 2: to do the whole book, they could just do the
Speaker 2: first ten pages and then you could send that to
Speaker 2: the agents. And so they get up because these agents
Speaker 2: and these public that most people in this business have
Speaker 2: terrible imaginations. They want everything laid out in front of
Speaker 2: them as exactly as it's going to be, when in reality,
Speaker 2: in the old days, you'd say I got an idea,
Speaker 2: I'm gonna be a boxer and I'm gonna be a loser.
Speaker 2: But then I win, and they go all right, go
Speaker 2: ahead and make that movie. Comes back with Rocky. Right nowadays,
Speaker 2: you try to pitch that you'd have to have the
Speaker 2: poster done, you'd have to have the script done, you know,
Speaker 2: before anybody would touch it. So people are very lacking
Speaker 2: in imagination these days in those positions, so you do
Speaker 2: have to present them with a clear of an idea
Speaker 2: as possible. And yeah, I bet there's some kids out
Speaker 2: there who would do it for nothing or for subway sandwich.
Speaker 1: Mhmm, Billy, is there anything else you want to say
Speaker 1: to the people of the computer before we go?
Speaker 6: No, No, you guys have been great lyle I'm hoping
Speaker 6: to go to your New York show on the nineteenth.
Speaker 6: And uh, you know, Tim, I love your work. I'm
Speaker 6: not like too familiar with everything that you've done as far.
Speaker 2: As your you could have just said you love my work.
Speaker 6: No, I'm super because my girlfriend is like super into
Speaker 6: your work and she she watches off.
Speaker 1: I don't think she watched He's always the boyfriend.
Speaker 6: Checks out yourself.
Speaker 1: So all right, cool, anyway, I have my best Thanks
Speaker 1: for calling, Billy, of course, have a good night. Thanks
Speaker 1: good night.
Speaker 2: I'd imagine a like situation like SEMy meets Robert not
Speaker 2: to compare myself to Robert DeNiro.
Speaker 1: Mister, I love your movies. I haven't seen all of them,
Speaker 1: you understand, Yeah, I mean you can love if someone's movie,
Speaker 1: you see one.
Speaker 2: But you would know would say that through around here.
Speaker 2: They would be like, I love your movies. They wouldn't
Speaker 2: add like I'm not familiar with.
Speaker 1: Well listen, Tim, Tim to me, you're a hero. I've
Speaker 1: seen it all. I fucking love you. I really appreciate
Speaker 1: you caught this is This has been a great, uh,
Speaker 1: you know, fun full circle moment for me because I've
Speaker 1: told you I've been a you know, a huge fan.
Speaker 1: So I was a fucking kid and so I really
Speaker 1: appreciate you coming.
Speaker 2: No, I love what you're doing here. And uh, it's
Speaker 2: fun to talk. It's fun to get I love I
Speaker 2: got the gift I got. You got to get the
Speaker 2: gat gift to get.
Speaker 1: No, but it is fun.
Speaker 2: It's easy and fun. And if you ever want me
Speaker 2: to come back, I will not be Uh. I will
Speaker 2: not be offended if you don't want me back, but
Speaker 2: come back at whenever you want. Well, I know you've
Speaker 2: got a great audience out there. This is your baby,
Speaker 2: and congratulations, thanks Tim and the people they did they
Speaker 2: love you, and congratulations. Let's hear it for Let's hear
Speaker 2: it for you people at Homer clapping.
Speaker 1: I believe that, then then go pee and yeah leave
Speaker 1: is you're gonna keep talking? Is there?
Speaker 4: Well?
Speaker 1: Is there any you you want to do your plugs
Speaker 1: again or anything else you want to say to the people?
Speaker 2: Oh? Well, just yes, I mean I'm touring. If do
Speaker 2: you have a European audience?
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah we have. We have some people in Europe
Speaker 1: and in the UK. Please go see this man in
Speaker 1: the UK. If you haven't, by the way, go check
Speaker 1: out an Evening with Tim Highdecker on YouTube for a
Speaker 1: little bit of a taste of what you beginning.
Speaker 2: It's all there on Cinema. Is the other show I
Speaker 2: do that is Uh, we're all self funded. We didn't
Speaker 2: really talk about this, but not self funded. It's subscriber funded.
Speaker 2: The High Network, the High Network. Yeah, if you've seen
Speaker 2: on cinema most people a lot of people have, but
Speaker 2: it's this thing that get it's so big and so
Speaker 2: it's like.
Speaker 1: The Marvel Universe.
Speaker 2: You know, there's so many components to it, but you've
Speaker 2: seen things because everything gets clipped out and posted the trial.
Speaker 2: We did the Decker on the Trial and on Cinema,
Speaker 2: but it all lives now on the High Network. It's
Speaker 2: High Network. Do TV and it's five bucks a month.
Speaker 2: And that's how we fund this. It's a you know,
Speaker 2: it's how we fund making the shows. Now it's going
Speaker 2: very well, but we can always use more. And then yeah,
Speaker 2: I'm heading to the UK in March to do my
Speaker 2: two TIMS show, which is stand up and then my
Speaker 2: band and that's gonna be over at Tim Heidecker dot com.
Speaker 2: Slash Live London's already sold out. Oh and uh, I
Speaker 2: think Galway's sold out. A few places have sold out,
Speaker 2: but there are tickets available in other parts of the
Speaker 2: beautiful Island, the British Isles.
Speaker 1: And uh, that's it. I'm gonna head back to Glendale. Folks,
Speaker 1: give this man your support. I will go on a whim.
Speaker 1: I will say this. I don't know if there would
Speaker 1: be a Therapy Gecko without a Tim Hideker. This man
Speaker 1: is an inspiration to me. He's an inspiration to all
Speaker 1: the folks out here doing fun, weird stuff on the computer.
Speaker 1: So please go check out the High Network, Go subscribe,
Speaker 1: Go see this man live. E I h E I
Speaker 1: go everything he's ever, lots of things you've done on
Speaker 1: HBO Max, go check it all out.
Speaker 2: How did I take this out?
Speaker 1: This is a this is a I broke You're fine.
Speaker 1: You're fine, Tim Heideck.
Speaker 2: All right, bye, everybody. It was the was a lot
Speaker 2: of fun.
Speaker 1: Never be Ken goes on the line taking of his
Speaker 1: own calls every night.
Speaker 2: Never be Ken goes doing his eye.
Speaker 1: He's teaching you loud in the lid of your life.
Speaker 1: Money's not really an expert.