WEBVTT - Deciding Fast + Getting Things Done with Kenzie Elizabeth 0:00:03.240 --> 0:00:05.840 No one has all the answers, but when we ask 0:00:05.880 --> 0:00:10.680 the right questions, we get a little closer, closer to truths, 0:00:11.440 --> 0:00:16.560 closer to each other, even closer to ourselves. I'm journalist 0:00:16.600 --> 0:00:19.280 Danielle Robe, and each week, my guests and I come 0:00:19.360 --> 0:00:22.800 together to challenge the status quo and our own ways 0:00:22.800 --> 0:00:27.360 of thinking by daring to ask what if, why not? 0:00:28.320 --> 0:00:29.080 And who says? 0:00:30.480 --> 0:00:30.600 So? 0:00:30.680 --> 0:00:35.920 Come curious, dig deep, and join the conversation. It's time 0:00:36.280 --> 0:00:42.160 to question everything. Hello, my friends, I hope you're having 0:00:42.320 --> 0:00:45.920 a really great week. I can't believe that we're like 0:00:45.960 --> 0:00:48.879 in mid November already. I'm starting to think about the 0:00:48.920 --> 0:00:53.280 new year and my New year planning. And last year 0:00:53.440 --> 0:00:57.600 I did a big New Year's New kind of reset 0:00:57.640 --> 0:01:00.440 episode in how to Goal Plan, and I'm going to 0:01:00.480 --> 0:01:02.680 do that again this year. I'm already kind of planning 0:01:02.720 --> 0:01:05.559 it out and I'm definitely going to download that form 0:01:05.760 --> 0:01:09.600 again so that we can plan together, So look out 0:01:09.600 --> 0:01:14.399 for that. And also, I'm going to be talking with 0:01:14.480 --> 0:01:17.400 you guys on Zoom through the holidays, so as always, 0:01:17.440 --> 0:01:19.160 if you want to send a screenshot of you sharing 0:01:19.200 --> 0:01:22.240 the episode with two friends or writing a review, you're 0:01:22.360 --> 0:01:25.679 entered to win the raffle to zoom with me. Okay, 0:01:25.840 --> 0:01:31.360 let's get into today's episode. So if Martha Stewart and 0:01:31.480 --> 0:01:33.959 Nancy Myers had a baby with Wi Fi, it would 0:01:34.000 --> 0:01:37.679 be Kenzie Elizabeth. Let me start from the beginning. Kenzie 0:01:37.720 --> 0:01:41.039 launched her YouTube channel at sixteen years old. She turned 0:01:41.040 --> 0:01:43.600 her life into a business before she could legally drink, 0:01:43.840 --> 0:01:47.240 and now, after a decade online, she's built an entire 0:01:47.280 --> 0:01:53.120 ecosystem around being herself, hosting parties, needle pointing, creating, connecting. 0:01:53.880 --> 0:01:56.720 She's the host of the House Guest podcast, the founder 0:01:56.760 --> 0:01:59.680 of Friend of Mine, and somehow manages to make domestic 0:01:59.720 --> 0:02:04.200 life look aspirational and real. She's the girl who will 0:02:04.240 --> 0:02:07.440 needle point with Grandma's on Thursday, throw a Nancy Meyer's 0:02:07.480 --> 0:02:10.480 themed dinner party on Friday, and then ship product orders 0:02:10.480 --> 0:02:13.920 by herself on Saturday. Kenzie and I are friends. We 0:02:14.000 --> 0:02:17.000 met through the podcasting world years ago, and one of 0:02:17.080 --> 0:02:19.480 the things I've always loved about her, aside from the 0:02:19.520 --> 0:02:22.919 obvious you know she's warm and funny and so easy 0:02:22.960 --> 0:02:25.880 to connect with, is that Kensie goes for it. Check 0:02:25.960 --> 0:02:28.600 her TikTok or her YouTube out and you'll see what 0:02:28.639 --> 0:02:31.320 I mean. Buy a house at twenty four, she'll figure 0:02:31.360 --> 0:02:34.960 it out. Move states because she needs a change done easy. 0:02:35.240 --> 0:02:37.639 If the house needs painting, she's rolling up her sleeves, 0:02:37.960 --> 0:02:41.040 and if there's a power tool involved, she's already googled 0:02:41.080 --> 0:02:45.240 how to use it. She's decisive and scrappy and basically 0:02:45.280 --> 0:02:48.840 allergic to waiting for permission. Here's a funny example. For years, 0:02:48.840 --> 0:02:51.440 she wasn't interested in dating. We would always talk about it. 0:02:51.520 --> 0:02:53.480 She was like, not interested, don't want to do it, 0:02:53.720 --> 0:02:55.840 and then recently she decided to do a twelve date 0:02:55.919 --> 0:02:58.880 challenge for YouTube. Okay, and by date number four she 0:02:58.919 --> 0:03:02.080 had a boyfriend. Kenzi is just a doer, and I 0:03:02.160 --> 0:03:04.000 like to think of myself as a doer too, But 0:03:04.280 --> 0:03:06.919 I don't know about you. Sometimes I feel stuck in things. 0:03:07.160 --> 0:03:10.480 I'll analyze or future cast or make pros and cons lists, 0:03:10.760 --> 0:03:12.359 and then I kind of hear that phrase in my 0:03:12.520 --> 0:03:14.720 head and I guess I say it to myself, which is, 0:03:14.800 --> 0:03:17.800 you're not a tree. Move Danielle. And that's what I 0:03:17.880 --> 0:03:21.560 so admire about Kenzie. She doesn't over philosophize change. She 0:03:21.880 --> 0:03:24.880 just moves, and she trusts herself enough to take the 0:03:24.880 --> 0:03:28.160 step before she's sure it's perfect. She is undeniably a 0:03:28.200 --> 0:03:31.680 product of this post everything, hustle, hard DIY internet moment, 0:03:32.000 --> 0:03:34.320 and she conveys that quality that I think we're all 0:03:34.400 --> 0:03:38.560 chasing online realness. So today is a pretty casual conversation. 0:03:38.960 --> 0:03:41.240 We cover the gamut, how she learned to trust her 0:03:41.280 --> 0:03:44.280 gut over everyone else's advice, how the grief of her 0:03:44.280 --> 0:03:47.560 brother dying reshaped her friendships, and why she believes in 0:03:47.640 --> 0:03:51.440 faith but not perfection. So the question we're circling today 0:03:51.600 --> 0:03:55.960 is whose voice is running your life? Yours or everyone else's. 0:03:56.440 --> 0:04:06.400 It's time to question everything with Kenzie Elizabeth. Some describe 0:04:06.400 --> 0:04:10.320 you as a walking Pinterest board. What is one quote, 0:04:10.360 --> 0:04:13.440 to outfit or aesthetic that you are living by this season? 0:04:14.040 --> 0:04:16.640 I would say I love even though I don't fully 0:04:16.680 --> 0:04:19.960 live this, but I love the slow like country living. 0:04:20.040 --> 0:04:24.160 Life just feels so good. Country core life, Yes, country core. 0:04:24.720 --> 0:04:27.440 What do you think surprises people when they meet you 0:04:27.480 --> 0:04:27.960 in person? 0:04:28.520 --> 0:04:30.760 I think that I'm literally the exact same. 0:04:31.040 --> 0:04:33.880 Either that or I feel like everyone would assume that 0:04:33.920 --> 0:04:35.800 I'm very high maintenance and I'm actually not. Like I 0:04:35.839 --> 0:04:37.360 grew up with eight siblings, so you don't really have 0:04:37.480 --> 0:04:41.080 that liberty. But I would say either that I'm literally 0:04:41.080 --> 0:04:44.760 the exact same, or that I'm actually not high maintenance. 0:04:45.360 --> 0:04:46.720 I think you are the exact same. 0:04:47.279 --> 0:04:49.599 Yeah, I talk the same. When I'm like vlogging on YouTube, 0:04:49.600 --> 0:04:50.720 I feel i'm face haiming a friend. 0:04:50.760 --> 0:04:52.440 If anything. I think I might be funnier in person 0:04:52.480 --> 0:04:55.240 because you have something to react to. You're very funny. Yes, 0:04:55.279 --> 0:04:56.839 thank you so much, but like people do not know 0:04:56.880 --> 0:04:57.520 that on YouTube. 0:04:57.640 --> 0:05:00.280 What's something that you believed about yourself at twenty that 0:05:00.320 --> 0:05:01.000 you've let go of? 0:05:01.320 --> 0:05:03.599 Oh my god, I mean so much. At twenty. 0:05:03.760 --> 0:05:07.400 I was way more likely to listen to what other 0:05:07.440 --> 0:05:10.040 people were telling me I needed to do then listen 0:05:10.080 --> 0:05:10.520 to myself. 0:05:10.520 --> 0:05:14.120 And I think that's great. I personally love advice. 0:05:13.760 --> 0:05:16.279 From people that I want to be more like. But 0:05:16.760 --> 0:05:20.880 I was relying far too heavily on people's opinions that 0:05:20.920 --> 0:05:22.760 I admired. So I think maybe it's like didn't really 0:05:22.760 --> 0:05:24.480 trust myself or I didn't think that I was going 0:05:24.520 --> 0:05:27.200 to make good decisions on my own. Yeah, and I 0:05:27.200 --> 0:05:30.080 would actually go back and probably change majority of those. Like, 0:05:30.120 --> 0:05:32.080 there's people that I dated that I would have never 0:05:32.160 --> 0:05:34.960 dated in my right mind. There's choices that I made 0:05:34.960 --> 0:05:37.800 career wise. I would put things on hold to like 0:05:37.880 --> 0:05:41.800 serve their vision more. So I don't regret most of that, 0:05:41.920 --> 0:05:43.800 but I think that I would go back and I 0:05:43.800 --> 0:05:44.719 would do it differently. 0:05:44.760 --> 0:05:45.080 Now. 0:05:45.200 --> 0:05:49.279 For sure, you shared your life in your twenties so openly. 0:05:49.760 --> 0:05:51.360 Does privacy look different. 0:05:51.040 --> 0:05:51.520 To you now? 0:05:52.080 --> 0:05:54.640 There's things in my life that feel like more sacred 0:05:54.880 --> 0:05:58.960 that I don't share, that are just more like emotional. Yeah, 0:05:59.000 --> 0:06:02.000 privacy is different when I was younger, especially in college, 0:06:02.040 --> 0:06:04.920 Like when you're logging every day, you're with your friends 0:06:04.960 --> 0:06:07.320 all the time, so there was always so many different people, 0:06:07.400 --> 0:06:09.200 and I think that, like, my relationships are a lot 0:06:09.240 --> 0:06:09.920 more private now. 0:06:10.640 --> 0:06:12.560 One of the things I've noticed about you can see 0:06:12.720 --> 0:06:15.599 is like you have never, at a young age, never 0:06:15.680 --> 0:06:19.919 been afraid to make big decisions, like you move states, 0:06:20.200 --> 0:06:23.719 you bought a house, you bought a car, like things 0:06:23.720 --> 0:06:26.679 that people get nervous about in their thirties, forties and fifties, 0:06:26.720 --> 0:06:29.520 and you just push forward. What is that? 0:06:29.520 --> 0:06:31.279 That's actually my favorite quality about myself. 0:06:31.320 --> 0:06:33.080 Like there's a lot of things I don't like, but 0:06:33.400 --> 0:06:36.599 I'm very decisive and it's gotten me in a lot 0:06:36.640 --> 0:06:38.600 of trouble and I haven't always been your right decisions, 0:06:39.200 --> 0:06:42.039 But I'm like whatever, the opposite of all talk is. 0:06:42.080 --> 0:06:42.400 That's me. 0:06:42.560 --> 0:06:45.520 Like if I was second, I am all walk. Yeah, 0:06:45.880 --> 0:06:47.080 I just have like a gut feeling. 0:06:47.120 --> 0:06:47.720 I follow it. 0:06:48.000 --> 0:06:49.880 I always say like I am Hawaian because I had 0:06:49.880 --> 0:06:51.640 a dad who like really thought I could be president. 0:06:51.720 --> 0:06:53.440 Like my dad just believes me so much. So I 0:06:53.440 --> 0:06:55.440 think that I had the safety of that relationship and 0:06:55.440 --> 0:06:58.520 someone always backing me. That definitely made it a lot easier. 0:06:58.560 --> 0:06:59.760 I don't think I would have been like that if 0:06:59.760 --> 0:07:01.160 it were for that relationship. 0:07:01.920 --> 0:07:04.520 But yeah, I'm very critical of your decisions. 0:07:04.520 --> 0:07:06.760 Ever, he's not critical, but he's the first person to 0:07:06.760 --> 0:07:10.200 tell me I'm wrong. Like he's not the dad that's 0:07:10.240 --> 0:07:12.800 like my perfect angel daughter who's never done anything wrong 0:07:12.840 --> 0:07:15.880 in her life. I'm literally my dad, Like we're so similar. 0:07:16.320 --> 0:07:17.800 So I think a lot of the decisions that I 0:07:17.880 --> 0:07:20.520 make like he gets it. So he's not necessarily critical. 0:07:20.560 --> 0:07:21.480 He's very supportive. 0:07:21.840 --> 0:07:25.920 Yeah, there's definitely things that I've done that he hasn't loved, 0:07:26.000 --> 0:07:27.360 but he just kind of lets me live. 0:07:28.000 --> 0:07:31.000 That's you be you. Is there any advice that you 0:07:31.040 --> 0:07:34.440 would give to your younger self who is just starting out, Like, 0:07:34.480 --> 0:07:35.880 is there anything you wish you could tell her. 0:07:36.120 --> 0:07:38.720 I started when I was sixteen, Like I was so young, 0:07:39.760 --> 0:07:42.280 I would say, you don't want to appeal to everyone. 0:07:42.600 --> 0:07:43.920 I was really focused. 0:07:43.600 --> 0:07:46.240 On being very broad and appealing to like a mass audience. 0:07:46.280 --> 0:07:48.280 And I wish I would have gone a little bit 0:07:48.320 --> 0:07:51.600 more like niche and specific, because what I didn't realize 0:07:51.640 --> 0:07:53.880 is that I wasn't connecting with people as much as 0:07:53.880 --> 0:07:56.120 I could be because I was trying to make everything 0:07:56.160 --> 0:07:59.240 so broad to where it appealed to, like the masses, 0:07:59.360 --> 0:08:00.000 but really. 0:07:59.800 --> 0:08:02.800 Like trying to find your crowd. And I think that 0:08:02.880 --> 0:08:03.559 helped me back. 0:08:04.000 --> 0:08:07.400 Do you ever feel like you're outgrowing the identity that 0:08:07.440 --> 0:08:09.920 you've created, and if so, how do you deal with that? 0:08:10.760 --> 0:08:14.360 No, because it grows with me, Like my whole platform 0:08:14.560 --> 0:08:16.920 is me, which I do kind of hate a lot, 0:08:17.080 --> 0:08:21.920 like I get so tired of myself, But because it's me, 0:08:22.160 --> 0:08:22.800 I feel like it's. 0:08:22.720 --> 0:08:23.840 Just always evolving with me. 0:08:24.000 --> 0:08:26.680 I do sometimes think like have I lost to so 0:08:26.760 --> 0:08:28.680 much my audience in becoming like a grandma? Like I 0:08:28.720 --> 0:08:31.080 was so crazy and fun before, you know, I don't 0:08:31.120 --> 0:08:33.240 ever feel like I've outgrown it because it's always growing 0:08:33.280 --> 0:08:35.880 with me, Like simultaneously. 0:08:35.920 --> 0:08:38.079 Have you lost your audience or I feel like you've 0:08:38.080 --> 0:08:40.080 gained audience since being a grandma. 0:08:40.160 --> 0:08:42.199 I don't know, Like there could have been all these 0:08:42.200 --> 0:08:44.000 people who stopped, and there could have been all these 0:08:44.040 --> 0:08:45.520 new people and then it just evened out. 0:08:45.760 --> 0:08:48.160 But I don't think so. I think people like, even if. 0:08:48.040 --> 0:08:49.960 They don't relate to the whole grandma thing, I think 0:08:49.960 --> 0:08:51.360 they can get down with it for a little bit. 0:08:51.480 --> 0:08:54.960 Yeah, I think so too. Hopefully does any part of 0:08:55.000 --> 0:08:57.680 you ever want to get offline? 0:08:58.240 --> 0:09:00.960 No, I really love it. 0:09:01.040 --> 0:09:02.520 I always hear people who are like, I want to 0:09:02.520 --> 0:09:04.240 make a lot of money, and then like you'll never 0:09:04.240 --> 0:09:07.040 hear from me again, Like, I truly love it, Like 0:09:07.160 --> 0:09:09.320 you could make billions and you'll be I would still 0:09:09.360 --> 0:09:11.480 want to do it. Like I love making videos, I 0:09:11.480 --> 0:09:12.160 love podcasts. 0:09:12.160 --> 0:09:14.160 I really love it. I would still be doing it. 0:09:14.160 --> 0:09:15.960 It's really amazing I was doing when I was making 0:09:16.040 --> 0:09:16.480 no money. 0:09:16.559 --> 0:09:19.600 You know, is there a lesson about monetizing your life 0:09:19.600 --> 0:09:20.800 that no one prepared you for? 0:09:21.200 --> 0:09:23.640 No. I have found a way to monetize every single 0:09:23.640 --> 0:09:24.200 thing in my life. 0:09:24.240 --> 0:09:26.240 I love hobbies and that's my whole thing. But I've 0:09:26.240 --> 0:09:27.400 monetized all my hobbies. 0:09:27.440 --> 0:09:29.560 What does that mean? Give me specifics, like you get 0:09:29.600 --> 0:09:30.560 paid to needle point. 0:09:30.880 --> 0:09:33.520 Needle Point is one. We now sell a needle Point canvases. 0:09:33.559 --> 0:09:36.120 We're like launching under a big needle point company. Hosting 0:09:36.160 --> 0:09:38.600 dinner parties. I love cooking. I start a home brand 0:09:38.679 --> 0:09:40.880 that's doing all of that. Reading, I have a book 0:09:40.880 --> 0:09:43.839 club with the podcast Gardening. Will do stuff with that, 0:09:44.000 --> 0:09:46.199 and even when it's a hobby, it's like I'm sharing it. 0:09:46.240 --> 0:09:48.200 I feel like when I had less hobbies, it was 0:09:48.200 --> 0:09:50.560 harder for me because I was like, Okay, everything feels 0:09:50.600 --> 0:09:53.040 like a little bit of work, but I just have 0:09:53.240 --> 0:09:55.280 so many hobbies and like, I love what I do 0:09:55.320 --> 0:09:58.040 and it just is all kind of come together. In 0:09:58.080 --> 0:10:00.360 my earlier twenties, though, the reason I got so into 0:10:00.360 --> 0:10:02.600 hobbies was because I didn't really have anything outside of 0:10:02.640 --> 0:10:04.920 like work and going out. So I wanted to have 0:10:05.040 --> 0:10:08.319 something to my life that I found interesting. 0:10:08.400 --> 0:10:10.280 The coolest part about hobbies or the people that you 0:10:10.280 --> 0:10:12.840 connect with. That's why people don't tell you about hobbies. 0:10:12.559 --> 0:10:14.880 Is that I have so many people in my life 0:10:14.920 --> 0:10:16.400 that I would have never met had it up and 0:10:16.640 --> 0:10:18.760 hobbies like the ranch hand at the ranch I go to, 0:10:18.840 --> 0:10:21.280 I talked to like very frequently, like I have my 0:10:21.559 --> 0:10:23.720 people at the farmer's market that like sell me plants 0:10:23.760 --> 0:10:25.560 that I taught. Like it's just so cool. Need appointing. 0:10:25.600 --> 0:10:27.160 I go and like, you know all these grandma. I 0:10:27.200 --> 0:10:29.240 was like, you know, that's my dream. You meet a 0:10:29.280 --> 0:10:31.240 lot of like really cool people. I think in my 0:10:31.280 --> 0:10:34.120 earlier twenties it was hard because it didn't feel like 0:10:34.160 --> 0:10:36.199 I was ever like clocking out in a way. 0:10:36.240 --> 0:10:37.600 But like I have a cool shop ever, so it's 0:10:37.640 --> 0:10:38.760 like not the worst thing in the world. 0:10:39.200 --> 0:10:41.600 So I started hobbies to not monetize them, and then 0:10:41.600 --> 0:10:42.920 I like build whole business around that. 0:10:42.960 --> 0:10:44.040 So like that's kind of about the door. 0:10:44.360 --> 0:10:45.960 How did you know how to build a business? 0:10:46.320 --> 0:10:49.760 People really underestimate YouTube. When I went to school, I 0:10:49.800 --> 0:10:52.800 majored in business, and I was so surprised by how 0:10:52.800 --> 0:10:55.880 many things I'd learned just being in that space. I 0:10:56.080 --> 0:10:58.760 maybe didn't know the actual term or what it was, 0:10:59.200 --> 0:11:01.800 but I really did learned so much doing YouTube for 0:11:01.920 --> 0:11:03.960 like a couple of years prior. And I also just 0:11:04.000 --> 0:11:05.720 like love it. You can learn so much to like 0:11:05.760 --> 0:11:09.640 podcast in books, in just by doing I've learned way 0:11:09.640 --> 0:11:12.280 more in those areas than I ever did in school. 0:11:12.480 --> 0:11:15.280 Give me nitty gritty, like because you have a right 0:11:15.280 --> 0:11:19.480 hand person who's helping you create all these products, or 0:11:19.520 --> 0:11:20.679 you're doing this solo. 0:11:20.800 --> 0:11:22.320 So the business is just me. 0:11:22.600 --> 0:11:25.080 We do have people that are freelanced, that are heavily involved, 0:11:25.160 --> 0:11:26.760 like I couldn't do it without them, Like we are 0:11:26.760 --> 0:11:28.439 building a team, but there's no one full time. 0:11:28.640 --> 0:11:31.240 I'll give you an example, like all the card games 0:11:31.640 --> 0:11:33.640 I ship out of my apartment. 0:11:33.880 --> 0:11:35.959 Okay, No, we do have a fulfillment center. 0:11:36.040 --> 0:11:36.720 Okay I can't. 0:11:36.840 --> 0:11:39.080 Yeah that I can't do. But we don't have like 0:11:39.080 --> 0:11:40.080 full time employees. 0:11:40.360 --> 0:11:42.920 We do have like teams and vendors that are obviously 0:11:42.960 --> 0:11:45.120 like making the products and not like doing that. 0:11:45.559 --> 0:11:47.200 Yeah, but I'm not mailing them. 0:11:47.520 --> 0:11:49.520 I go to a PO box to drop things off. 0:11:49.520 --> 0:11:52.440 But I'm amazed by mail, Like the fact that we 0:11:52.559 --> 0:11:55.040 can get things from one place to another so quickly 0:11:55.440 --> 0:11:56.160 blows my mind. 0:11:56.200 --> 0:11:58.439 No, that does blow my mind. That to me is crazy. 0:11:58.520 --> 0:12:00.600 Sometimes I'll like mail so the out I CAMPLI this 0:12:00.640 --> 0:12:02.080 is going to be like so and So's house, like 0:12:02.120 --> 0:12:05.319 so like you know, after something. I asked a lot 0:12:05.320 --> 0:12:07.520 of questions, and honestly, I was so lucky with the 0:12:07.559 --> 0:12:10.199 podcast because I was able to interview and be in 0:12:10.280 --> 0:12:13.240 rooms with all of these very successful entrepreneurs that I 0:12:13.240 --> 0:12:15.439 would have never been in the same room as otherwise. 0:12:15.679 --> 0:12:18.080 So I was able to learn up close to like 0:12:18.240 --> 0:12:21.360 so many other people so cool years leading up to it. 0:12:21.480 --> 0:12:22.480 So I got really lucky. 0:12:22.720 --> 0:12:26.079 That's so cool. Have you always been that girl or 0:12:26.440 --> 0:12:28.640 did you have like a glow up at any point 0:12:28.679 --> 0:12:29.280 in your life? 0:12:29.520 --> 0:12:30.720 Like what do you mean by that? Girl? 0:12:31.440 --> 0:12:34.880 Like, I feel like people are drawn to you, like 0:12:34.960 --> 0:12:39.240 you sparkle, thank you, And I'm wondering if that's always 0:12:39.240 --> 0:12:41.320 been the case or if you can pinpoint a moment 0:12:41.559 --> 0:12:43.120 where something changed. 0:12:43.880 --> 0:12:45.800 This reminds me of something that you've said to me. 0:12:46.120 --> 0:12:48.440 How Like I wasn't the cutestin school, but I thought 0:12:48.440 --> 0:12:51.280 I was, like I've always felt that way, like I've 0:12:51.280 --> 0:12:52.400 always had that energy. 0:12:52.720 --> 0:12:55.640 Yeah, I don't know if that was always true, And it. 0:12:55.600 --> 0:12:58.560 Really depends on who you ask for sure, But I 0:12:58.640 --> 0:13:01.000 was like clast favorite in the yearbook. I was very involvable. Also, 0:13:01.040 --> 0:13:02.560 I was like going to court for truancy. Yeah, I 0:13:02.600 --> 0:13:05.000 was like really working in the system there. But I 0:13:05.120 --> 0:13:06.800 just like people, like, I don't know. I was always 0:13:06.880 --> 0:13:09.760 very talkative. I was always very social. I was always 0:13:09.800 --> 0:13:11.480 one who was like planning the parties and the surprise 0:13:11.520 --> 0:13:12.320 birthday parties and. 0:13:12.320 --> 0:13:13.040 All that stuff. 0:13:13.720 --> 0:13:16.360 I think something that I have noticed about you that 0:13:16.480 --> 0:13:21.040 is funny is that people would not expect that you 0:13:21.240 --> 0:13:23.720 have done so much deep in our work because you 0:13:23.720 --> 0:13:25.480 don't talk about it all the time. It's not like 0:13:25.600 --> 0:13:29.960 your brand. But you are so into self development books. 0:13:30.280 --> 0:13:34.640 You're so into bettering yourself. Was that always the case? Yes, 0:13:34.880 --> 0:13:35.760 from a young age. 0:13:35.800 --> 0:13:37.000 Oh my god, my whole life. 0:13:37.160 --> 0:13:39.320 I always joke that my dad is like at my 0:13:39.400 --> 0:13:42.040 let just like minus the billions of dollars, Like he 0:13:42.600 --> 0:13:44.000 is so into leadership. 0:13:44.040 --> 0:13:45.760 He's always been so into self development. 0:13:45.800 --> 0:13:48.839 He was a huge athlete growing up, so he really 0:13:48.880 --> 0:13:51.920 got that I think mindset from being an athlete. 0:13:52.040 --> 0:13:53.720 But no, I've always been so much. 0:13:53.880 --> 0:13:55.480 I was reading self help books in like high school, 0:13:55.559 --> 0:13:58.440 in middle school. Actually really it's crazy. Back then it 0:13:58.480 --> 0:14:00.000 was more like Christian based books. But yeah, I woul 0:14:00.120 --> 0:14:02.800 always doing stuff. What was the book that started at 0:14:02.800 --> 0:14:04.720 all for you? I don't know if there's one book. 0:14:04.720 --> 0:14:07.240 As a kid, I just remember always having them and 0:14:07.280 --> 0:14:09.439 I was in therapy like starting in fifth grade. 0:14:09.480 --> 0:14:11.520 So I feel like that kind of led me down 0:14:11.559 --> 0:14:12.480 that path a little bit. 0:14:12.640 --> 0:14:13.920 Yeah, I can't think of. 0:14:13.880 --> 0:14:16.560 One book though before like eighteen that I remember, but 0:14:16.640 --> 0:14:18.360 I was reading them, Like I don't know how much 0:14:18.360 --> 0:14:19.200 it actually did. 0:14:19.040 --> 0:14:20.640 For me, but I was doing it, you know. 0:14:21.440 --> 0:14:24.960 So your company is called friend of Mine and it 0:14:25.000 --> 0:14:26.920 even has the word friend in it. When I think 0:14:26.960 --> 0:14:29.440 of you, I think of a truly good friend. You 0:14:29.480 --> 0:14:32.160 are a solid friend to a lot of different people 0:14:32.640 --> 0:14:34.320 who taught you how to be a good friend. 0:14:35.040 --> 0:14:37.160 I don't know if I was taught to be a 0:14:37.200 --> 0:14:39.760 good friend as much as that was just something that 0:14:40.400 --> 0:14:41.520 I cared so much about. 0:14:41.560 --> 0:14:43.520 I also got very lucky at a young age. 0:14:43.720 --> 0:14:45.560 So many of those people I'm still like the people 0:14:45.600 --> 0:14:47.160 I was texting on the way here, I've known since 0:14:47.160 --> 0:14:47.640 I was eight. 0:14:48.040 --> 0:14:50.800 Also, I think my childhoo best. 0:14:50.640 --> 0:14:54.440 Friend was an only child, and my home life at 0:14:54.440 --> 0:14:57.120 the time was very tumultuous and like really all over 0:14:57.160 --> 0:14:59.240 the place. And I love my family, we're so close style, 0:14:59.280 --> 0:15:02.040 but it was just very rocky. So I think that 0:15:02.040 --> 0:15:05.000 that friendship like really shaped me a ton looking back, 0:15:05.440 --> 0:15:08.800 because we were kind of each other's family, and that's 0:15:08.840 --> 0:15:10.840 really I would say where I like learned more so 0:15:11.040 --> 0:15:12.800 to be a good friend. I think maybe from other 0:15:12.800 --> 0:15:15.000 people around me. I don't think it was so intentional. 0:15:15.200 --> 0:15:17.000 My parents didn't like sit down and say, like we 0:15:17.080 --> 0:15:20.000 value friendship. I think it was just like something I 0:15:20.040 --> 0:15:20.640 really wanted. 0:15:21.000 --> 0:15:23.600 I asked because one of my favorite qualities about my 0:15:23.680 --> 0:15:25.920 mom is I think she's a really good friend to people. 0:15:26.360 --> 0:15:28.360 But like you said, we never sat down and talked 0:15:28.360 --> 0:15:31.440 about friendship. I think I watched her, like when her 0:15:31.440 --> 0:15:33.920 friend Susan had breast cancer, she would go and drop 0:15:33.960 --> 0:15:37.120 food off every week, and she just really shows up 0:15:37.120 --> 0:15:41.920 for people. But I do think that like in my twenties, 0:15:42.680 --> 0:15:46.000 I took pieces of friendship. I don't know how to 0:15:46.040 --> 0:15:48.360 say this, Like I watched my friends be friends and 0:15:48.400 --> 0:15:50.800 I thought, oh, that was so nice how she showed 0:15:50.880 --> 0:15:52.320 up for me. That felt good. I should do that 0:15:52.360 --> 0:15:54.640 for other people, and I would like take all these 0:15:54.680 --> 0:15:57.800 little pieces. Have you experienced that at all? 0:15:58.040 --> 0:16:02.080 Yes? And I actually think the biggest influence as far 0:16:02.120 --> 0:16:04.560 as friendship would go, would just be like Texas culture, 0:16:04.920 --> 0:16:06.200 That's just kind of how it is. 0:16:06.240 --> 0:16:08.200 Like I was surrounded by so many people who were 0:16:08.240 --> 0:16:10.160 such good friends and were always showing up, and like 0:16:10.240 --> 0:16:14.000 witnessing that definitely led me to want to do that 0:16:14.120 --> 0:16:15.360 more like my parents. 0:16:15.400 --> 0:16:17.200 They weren't like so social when I was a kid. 0:16:17.240 --> 0:16:19.960 They weren't like friends around all the time, and I 0:16:20.000 --> 0:16:21.240 think maybe I wanted that. 0:16:21.520 --> 0:16:22.360 I don't really know. 0:16:22.440 --> 0:16:24.760 I do think it's like the culture of Texas though 0:16:24.760 --> 0:16:29.000 like Texas is the very like welcoming place. It's very 0:16:29.040 --> 0:16:32.080 like Texas or die It's very community based, like people 0:16:32.120 --> 0:16:33.840 are always showing up for each other. Honestly, having a 0:16:33.920 --> 0:16:36.040 church background, I think it's a huge part of it 0:16:36.120 --> 0:16:38.600 because we were all so close, like my like youth 0:16:38.640 --> 0:16:41.480 group friends and I were like so so so close, 0:16:41.520 --> 0:16:43.680 Like we're still showing up for each other last week, 0:16:43.760 --> 0:16:47.640 like with someone's experiencing a tragedy. So maybe it's Texas, 0:16:47.680 --> 0:16:50.000 maybe it's a church background. I think it's a combination 0:16:50.080 --> 0:16:50.920 of just seeing. 0:16:50.680 --> 0:16:53.000 All that what is showing up mean for you? 0:16:53.360 --> 0:16:53.800 I think it. 0:16:53.760 --> 0:16:57.400 Looks different depending on the situation and also depending on 0:16:57.440 --> 0:16:59.280 the person. I think people are so scared to show 0:16:59.320 --> 0:17:00.960 up for other people because they think that that means 0:17:01.000 --> 0:17:02.320 you have to have all the answers, like you have 0:17:02.360 --> 0:17:03.760 to go there and you have to talk to them, 0:17:03.960 --> 0:17:06.040 you have to give them this advice, even when it's 0:17:06.040 --> 0:17:07.320 this catastrophic. 0:17:06.800 --> 0:17:08.080 Thing you've never experienced. 0:17:08.240 --> 0:17:10.320 And I think showing up for someone is actually very simple, 0:17:10.680 --> 0:17:12.639 going and sitting on the couch with them for four hours, 0:17:12.680 --> 0:17:14.159 Like you don't even have to speak, You don't have 0:17:14.200 --> 0:17:17.000 to talk, you can watch a show. You actually probably 0:17:17.000 --> 0:17:19.480 shouldn't offer advice if you don't have an experience, like 0:17:19.520 --> 0:17:22.520 if someone's not asking for it. It just varies, and 0:17:22.520 --> 0:17:24.760 then it could be like if you're a long distance 0:17:24.800 --> 0:17:26.240 friend just calling checking in. 0:17:26.680 --> 0:17:28.000 It just depends on the friendship. 0:17:28.320 --> 0:17:29.960 Is there anything that sticks out to you that a 0:17:30.000 --> 0:17:32.639 friend's done that made you feel really loved or taken 0:17:32.680 --> 0:17:33.000 care of? 0:17:33.760 --> 0:17:35.840 Oh mean, there's so much by like cheap best friends. 0:17:35.920 --> 0:17:39.359 Dom and Macie have been like my lifeline since like 0:17:39.440 --> 0:17:41.639 my brother passed away in January last year. Like I 0:17:41.680 --> 0:17:43.280 cry every time I talk about it, because like they've 0:17:43.320 --> 0:17:45.760 done everything. As soon as I found out, I texted 0:17:45.760 --> 0:17:47.120 domin I was like I need to hear. I found 0:17:47.119 --> 0:17:49.040 out probably two pm on a Sunday, and she was 0:17:49.200 --> 0:17:51.120 in my bed at like ten beyond Sunday, Like. 0:17:51.040 --> 0:17:52.480 She was there so fast. 0:17:52.680 --> 0:17:56.359 Wow, I think just like them consistently being there and 0:17:56.400 --> 0:17:59.320 consistently showing up, Like I've learned so much about friendship 0:17:59.320 --> 0:18:00.800 from specific my friendship with Domic. 0:18:00.840 --> 0:18:02.760 We've been first friends since you were like twenty years old. 0:18:03.000 --> 0:18:05.280 Yeah, and we've gone through so many different like life 0:18:05.280 --> 0:18:09.120 phases together, and I think that has been a friendship 0:18:09.119 --> 0:18:10.439 has probably made the biggest impact. 0:18:10.920 --> 0:18:12.840 But I think they're such a good example of people 0:18:12.840 --> 0:18:13.600 who just show up. 0:18:13.840 --> 0:18:16.639 It's like the best feeling in the world when you 0:18:16.680 --> 0:18:31.240 call on a friend and they're there. Faith is a 0:18:31.280 --> 0:18:33.840 really big part of your background. You touched on it 0:18:33.880 --> 0:18:35.760 a little bit. Does it show up for you in 0:18:35.760 --> 0:18:36.440 your life today? 0:18:36.480 --> 0:18:40.840 Still, Yeah, just in a different way. I think. Here's 0:18:40.880 --> 0:18:44.199 the thing. I've like always had a pretty strong faith. 0:18:44.800 --> 0:18:48.320 My relationship with the church has definitely like ebbed and flowed. 0:18:48.960 --> 0:18:51.960 But even when I was like so out of. 0:18:51.880 --> 0:18:54.520 It and like couldn't even like hear a worship song, 0:18:54.520 --> 0:18:56.840 it would like literally maybe want to punch someone into face. 0:18:57.080 --> 0:19:00.919 Like even at that point, I still heard, like what 0:19:01.000 --> 0:19:02.959 I felt was like a strong connection with God. 0:19:03.560 --> 0:19:05.280 I don't know if you feel this way, but I 0:19:05.320 --> 0:19:09.280 think like religion and a relationship with God can be 0:19:09.320 --> 0:19:10.240 two separate totally. 0:19:11.000 --> 0:19:13.280 They're very different, and they've always been very different to me. 0:19:13.320 --> 0:19:15.000 There's just been times where I've been like more involved 0:19:15.000 --> 0:19:17.720 with church, and I think that's really where things go south. 0:19:17.760 --> 0:19:19.600 And also like I love the church, Like I think 0:19:19.600 --> 0:19:21.960 there's like so many amazing things about it. I don't 0:19:22.000 --> 0:19:25.800 go religiously. I'm not always there, but I definitely see 0:19:25.840 --> 0:19:27.560 the pros. I've made some of my best friends with 0:19:27.560 --> 0:19:28.400 the word. I met don there. 0:19:28.520 --> 0:19:30.800 Definitely it's been a journey for sure. 0:19:31.240 --> 0:19:34.360 Yeah, but it is something that as much as I 0:19:34.440 --> 0:19:36.520 like try to get away from it, it's always there. 0:19:36.800 --> 0:19:40.160 Like as much as I try to get as far 0:19:40.240 --> 0:19:42.680 away and I have no interest, I somehow always find 0:19:42.680 --> 0:19:44.000 my way back. So I think I just kind of 0:19:44.000 --> 0:19:46.800 have to stop fighting it. There's just something I don't know. 0:19:47.359 --> 0:19:49.400 I actually have never asked you this. Did you grow 0:19:49.520 --> 0:19:52.600 up in a religious household or how did church become 0:19:52.640 --> 0:19:53.439 so important to you? 0:19:53.800 --> 0:19:56.880 So I didn't grow up in a very religious household. 0:19:56.880 --> 0:20:00.280 We would go on like Christmas in Easter occasionally, and 0:20:00.320 --> 0:20:02.399 then my parents had a really bad divorce when I 0:20:02.400 --> 0:20:04.600 was in middle school. And around that time I had 0:20:04.680 --> 0:20:07.080 friends who really inviting me to youth group. Right, so 0:20:07.119 --> 0:20:09.760 I go to youth camp. I'm obsassed, I'm dating the 0:20:09.760 --> 0:20:13.000 pastor some Within a week of course, classic's. 0:20:12.520 --> 0:20:13.920 The most meathing has ever happened. 0:20:13.960 --> 0:20:18.080 And I like make all these friends and I like 0:20:18.200 --> 0:20:18.680 loved it. 0:20:18.760 --> 0:20:21.080 So I started going on my own and then I 0:20:21.119 --> 0:20:23.600 had a pretty bad, like traumatic experience there and I 0:20:23.640 --> 0:20:24.320 stopped going. 0:20:24.440 --> 0:20:26.720 I ended up moving to la and I ended up in. 0:20:26.640 --> 0:20:30.280 A Bible college, which is like so backwards and crazy. 0:20:30.840 --> 0:20:32.720 So I didn't grow up and it was always my 0:20:32.800 --> 0:20:34.520 own thing, which I think is largely white. 0:20:34.520 --> 0:20:36.080 It's always been more of a relationship. 0:20:36.160 --> 0:20:40.000 Like I didn't grow up in like a religious environment, right, 0:20:40.359 --> 0:20:42.679 and I've always been like a very progressive person, so 0:20:42.720 --> 0:20:44.879 like I've never been like a conservative religious feel like 0:20:44.920 --> 0:20:47.440 that's never been my thing, which is another issue. 0:20:47.160 --> 0:20:48.560 That I've had. So like it's very layered. 0:20:49.000 --> 0:20:49.639 Do you pray? 0:20:50.880 --> 0:20:54.280 It's crazy, Like I just got a second place in Nashville, 0:20:54.560 --> 0:20:57.879 And I had always had this feeling that I was 0:20:57.960 --> 0:21:00.040 going to end up in Nashville at some point in 0:21:00.160 --> 0:21:02.159 some capacity. I didn't really feel like it was going 0:21:02.240 --> 0:21:03.800 to be full time. I just didn't know what that 0:21:03.880 --> 0:21:05.680 was going to look like. Normally, you know me, I'm 0:21:05.720 --> 0:21:07.680 so decisive. The second I have a feeling about something, 0:21:07.720 --> 0:21:09.800 I do it. But for some reason, I just know 0:21:09.840 --> 0:21:13.560 it's not yet. So Actually March of twenty twenty, were 0:21:13.600 --> 0:21:15.639 in Nashville when like COVID hit and I just bought my. 0:21:15.640 --> 0:21:18.840 House in Texas and I have this feeling immediate. I 0:21:18.880 --> 0:21:21.160 was like, oh my God. And I have these specific 0:21:21.240 --> 0:21:22.760 feelings about moving. 0:21:22.880 --> 0:21:24.800 Always, I was like, I'm going crazy. I just bought 0:21:24.800 --> 0:21:27.159 a house in Texas. Isn't sing and feel insane? But 0:21:27.240 --> 0:21:29.119 I just kind of clocked it in the back of 0:21:29.119 --> 0:21:31.040 my head. I was always like, there's like something in Nashville. 0:21:31.040 --> 0:21:34.160 I don't know what it is, but like eventually, fast 0:21:34.200 --> 0:21:36.879 forward to February of this year, I was visiting some 0:21:36.880 --> 0:21:38.560 friends in Nashville. I was there last minute. I wasn't 0:21:38.560 --> 0:21:40.359 even supposed to be there. I booked my flight like 0:21:40.400 --> 0:21:41.960 a day before. I was supposed to be there for 0:21:41.960 --> 0:21:43.960 two days. I was there for six and I had 0:21:44.000 --> 0:21:46.040 that feeling, but it was way stronger this time. 0:21:46.359 --> 0:21:47.639 How do you describe the feeling. 0:21:47.920 --> 0:21:50.359 It's just a really strong gut feeling to me. 0:21:50.440 --> 0:21:52.679 If something is a god thing, it's something that's like 0:21:52.720 --> 0:21:54.920 coming into my mind that like I'm not really trying 0:21:54.920 --> 0:21:57.680 to orchestraight, Like I wasn't trying to like actively move 0:21:57.720 --> 0:21:59.120 to Nashville. At that point, and all of a sudden, 0:21:59.160 --> 0:22:01.120 I started thinking about a lot, like it was coming 0:22:01.119 --> 0:22:03.199 to mind a ton, and it wasn't something that like 0:22:03.240 --> 0:22:07.720 I necessarily like wanted either. So in February I was 0:22:07.760 --> 0:22:10.879 there and I was talking to a friend and I 0:22:10.920 --> 0:22:13.359 was saying, like, I don't know what it is, but 0:22:13.440 --> 0:22:15.040 I just feel like I'm supposed to do it sooner 0:22:15.119 --> 0:22:15.840 or other than later. 0:22:16.280 --> 0:22:17.639 I think this is like the shift that I need 0:22:17.680 --> 0:22:18.399 to make in my life. 0:22:18.480 --> 0:22:20.800 I just have this like very strong gut feeling, but 0:22:20.880 --> 0:22:22.560 I also have this weird feeling that like, if it's 0:22:22.600 --> 0:22:24.320 meant to be, it's going to be easy. And I 0:22:24.359 --> 0:22:27.520 don't really subscribe to that like idea of life in general, 0:22:27.960 --> 0:22:30.320 but for some reason, I just really felt strong, if 0:22:30.320 --> 0:22:33.760 it's supposed to happen, it's going to happen. In that conversation, 0:22:33.960 --> 0:22:36.960 he gets a text from his landlord because there's two 0:22:37.000 --> 0:22:38.320 guest houses on this property. 0:22:38.760 --> 0:22:40.800 He gets at taxed from his landlord that. 0:22:40.520 --> 0:22:43.000 That guest house was opening up the date that I 0:22:43.040 --> 0:22:45.040 wanted it. So I was like, that's so crazy because 0:22:45.040 --> 0:22:47.400 all the other issues that I had too were all 0:22:47.480 --> 0:22:50.520 solved by living in that house, like specifically versus like 0:22:50.560 --> 0:22:53.399 another apartment or something in Nashville. So it was so crazy, 0:22:53.440 --> 0:22:54.920 but it was like I prayed about it that week 0:22:54.960 --> 0:22:57.240 and literally within days it happened, and it came together 0:22:57.359 --> 0:22:58.879 so seamlessly, to the point where I was like, that 0:22:58.920 --> 0:22:59.600 was the craziest thing. 0:22:59.520 --> 0:23:00.240 That's ever happened me. 0:23:00.320 --> 0:23:01.360 Do you ever get signs? 0:23:01.800 --> 0:23:03.040 Yes? Do you get signs? 0:23:03.320 --> 0:23:07.200 Okay? So I grew up without a lot of religion 0:23:07.240 --> 0:23:09.520 in my life at all, and I would say even 0:23:09.560 --> 0:23:13.879 without faith, and I'm like culturally Jewish. And then I 0:23:13.920 --> 0:23:17.600 moved to la and I met this guy. I actually 0:23:17.640 --> 0:23:19.320 had him on the podcast, so I won't recount it, 0:23:19.359 --> 0:23:22.560 but his name is Steve Carlston and he was the 0:23:22.600 --> 0:23:27.160 GM of NBC and he was Mormon, and I watched 0:23:27.240 --> 0:23:29.639 how he lived his life and I'd never been in 0:23:29.640 --> 0:23:32.760 such admiration of somebody. And it was around the same 0:23:32.800 --> 0:23:35.520 time that I started reading books like Oprah. That's was 0:23:35.520 --> 0:23:38.119 the first time I picked up self development. And a 0:23:38.160 --> 0:23:41.280 lot of these people that I was admiring virtually or 0:23:41.400 --> 0:23:44.680 up close had some sort of faith. They were all 0:23:44.680 --> 0:23:47.640 different religions. Some didn't even have religion, but they had 0:23:47.760 --> 0:23:51.640 faith in something in FARSI like, God means the deepest 0:23:51.640 --> 0:23:53.960 part of you. And I always have like loved that 0:23:54.080 --> 0:23:56.160 idea of it, and I thought, I wonder if I'm 0:23:56.160 --> 0:23:58.520 missing something because all these people I admire have such 0:23:58.520 --> 0:24:00.879 deep faith. And I worked on and I worked on it, 0:24:00.920 --> 0:24:02.480 and it would come and it would go, and I 0:24:02.520 --> 0:24:05.720 would waiver and I would be skeptical, and then I 0:24:05.760 --> 0:24:09.639 would feel something. And it wasn't until I dated the 0:24:09.720 --> 0:24:11.959 last boyfriend I had. He was Catholic and he had 0:24:12.040 --> 0:24:16.320 such a beautiful relationship with God, and I thought, whoa, 0:24:16.640 --> 0:24:20.160 it like clicked for me and we don't necessarily worship 0:24:20.200 --> 0:24:22.280 the same God. I don't know, like maybe we do. 0:24:22.320 --> 0:24:24.520 It's the universe. I'm not sure what it is. But 0:24:25.000 --> 0:24:28.879 ever since I became mindful like and noticing, signs have 0:24:28.920 --> 0:24:30.639 showed up in my life. That was the long story 0:24:30.680 --> 0:24:33.320 to say, like yes, and even though I noticed them, 0:24:33.359 --> 0:24:36.000 I'm still skeptical because like the inner child in me 0:24:36.160 --> 0:24:37.400 is like, is this for real? 0:24:38.080 --> 0:24:40.720 But by the way, I'm still like that, oh my God. 0:24:40.920 --> 0:24:41.600 Still yes. 0:24:41.720 --> 0:24:43.520 I still am like I don't know is this real? 0:24:43.560 --> 0:24:46.200 And I go through months where I am so disconnected 0:24:46.240 --> 0:24:48.440 and then I'll get back. That's what I mean by 0:24:48.840 --> 0:24:51.600 something always pulls me back in like there's always something, 0:24:51.880 --> 0:24:54.320 But I still had that even when I think I 0:24:54.359 --> 0:24:56.879 see something that I feel like is a sign, or 0:24:56.920 --> 0:24:59.760 I get this idea out of nowhere, it's actually something 0:24:59.800 --> 0:25:01.440 I was praying about and it's actually answered. 0:25:01.680 --> 0:25:03.320 I'm always like, but was that an answer, Preyer or 0:25:03.359 --> 0:25:06.120 was that just a coincidence? Always? Yeah, right, Even if 0:25:06.200 --> 0:25:06.600 none of. 0:25:06.560 --> 0:25:08.400 This is real, I would rather live with the hope 0:25:08.400 --> 0:25:10.639 that it is because it gives you something to believe 0:25:10.640 --> 0:25:12.720 in that's greater than yourself, that's supposed to be bringing 0:25:12.720 --> 0:25:13.399 people together. 0:25:13.800 --> 0:25:13.960 Now. 0:25:14.080 --> 0:25:16.760 Of course, religion, historically and even now it is being 0:25:17.040 --> 0:25:19.639 used in a very negative way where it's doing the 0:25:19.800 --> 0:25:22.480 complete opposite of that and like oppressing people, and that 0:25:22.560 --> 0:25:24.680 is not what I subscribe to. But I think it's 0:25:24.680 --> 0:25:27.800 a really beautiful thing to believe in something bigger than you. 0:25:28.359 --> 0:25:30.399 Another thing too, that my family and I talk about 0:25:30.400 --> 0:25:33.800 with grief is that when you have a loss that 0:25:33.920 --> 0:25:36.840 is so close to you and so catastrophic and like 0:25:36.960 --> 0:25:39.120 feels like a part of you is like ripped out, 0:25:39.560 --> 0:25:43.080 you almost have this like sixth sense where you feel 0:25:43.400 --> 0:25:46.359 God so much closer to you, even though you're like 0:25:46.440 --> 0:25:48.480 so angry and want like nothing to do with him, 0:25:48.800 --> 0:25:50.639 But there's just so many things in life that I 0:25:50.680 --> 0:25:53.640 feel like I have. It's weird to say advantage point 0:25:53.680 --> 0:25:55.960 of because like, obviously it's not a positive, but I 0:25:56.080 --> 0:25:58.560 feel like I can see things a lot clearer. It's 0:25:58.600 --> 0:26:00.639 like grief, there's this thing where it makes everything in 0:26:00.680 --> 0:26:03.960 the world so foggy you can't think straight. I still 0:26:03.960 --> 0:26:05.919 have such bad brain fogg this morning when we're recording, 0:26:05.960 --> 0:26:07.960 Like my brain fog is just so bad it can't 0:26:07.960 --> 0:26:10.880 even like speak normally still. But at the same time, 0:26:11.520 --> 0:26:16.040 you have this clarity of like understanding what really matters, 0:26:16.080 --> 0:26:17.119 what's worth your time. 0:26:17.720 --> 0:26:18.480 Anything that I. 0:26:18.400 --> 0:26:20.600 Was confused about, like relationally or with people in my 0:26:20.640 --> 0:26:25.120 life before, I think it was over time abundantly clear 0:26:25.119 --> 0:26:26.320 to me what the answers were. 0:26:26.359 --> 0:26:28.080 And I think a lot of that has to do 0:26:28.119 --> 0:26:28.639 with grief. 0:26:29.080 --> 0:26:30.560 I think it all kind of goes into this like 0:26:30.600 --> 0:26:33.520 spiritual realm, whatever it is, where you just have this 0:26:33.680 --> 0:26:36.840 like understanding when you experience such a loss and you 0:26:36.840 --> 0:26:40.600 yourself are like crash into a billion pieces and having 0:26:40.600 --> 0:26:41.679 to be put back together. 0:26:42.440 --> 0:26:45.600 You talk about your brother a lot on your podcast. 0:26:46.080 --> 0:26:47.280 Is it hard to talk about him? 0:26:47.640 --> 0:26:50.200 It depends on my vibe that day, Like some days 0:26:50.240 --> 0:26:53.280 I just can't at all, and other days, if I 0:26:53.320 --> 0:26:54.880 can talk about it publicly, if I feel a little 0:26:54.880 --> 0:26:56.640 more removed, Like today, I feel a little more removed. 0:26:57.240 --> 0:26:59.280 I find a lot of healing in it, and like 0:26:59.280 --> 0:27:01.840 connecting with other people in grief has been like beneficial 0:27:01.880 --> 0:27:05.080 to me. And that's not everyone's experience, but I feel 0:27:05.320 --> 0:27:06.320 a little bit of healing. 0:27:06.359 --> 0:27:10.520 I think, did you lose friends, Oh my god, because 0:27:10.520 --> 0:27:11.960 you felt like people didn't show up for you? 0:27:12.200 --> 0:27:15.320 Yes, that was my friend breakup. That's why it was 0:27:15.400 --> 0:27:21.200 so catastrophic and like painful. I would say I didn't 0:27:21.359 --> 0:27:23.879 lose many other friends because I felt that way. I 0:27:23.920 --> 0:27:27.520 think I just changed, Like you're so different at the course, 0:27:27.640 --> 0:27:29.639 like I've always been the same, but grief changes you 0:27:29.680 --> 0:27:31.560 in so many different ways, and I just like didn't 0:27:31.600 --> 0:27:34.480 have the energy for like so many other things. 0:27:34.480 --> 0:27:37.600 So you lose friendships in that way. I feel like overall, 0:27:37.640 --> 0:27:38.800 like my friends really showed up. 0:27:39.040 --> 0:27:40.800 One of the things I love about my friendship with 0:27:40.840 --> 0:27:43.000 you is that you're gen z and I'm a millennial. 0:27:43.680 --> 0:27:46.320 I'm wondering what you think are great divide is like, 0:27:46.440 --> 0:27:48.399 what do you notice is our biggest differences. 0:27:48.840 --> 0:27:49.080 One. 0:27:49.200 --> 0:27:52.679 I think that gen Z there's this like narrative around 0:27:52.680 --> 0:27:54.760 them being like very lazy and not wanting. 0:27:54.520 --> 0:27:57.040 To work and listen. Like that is true, I can 0:27:57.080 --> 0:27:58.240 see it. But I also think that. 0:27:58.200 --> 0:28:01.320 Gen Z is like brilliant, and I think that they 0:28:01.320 --> 0:28:04.160 have so many good ideas and that there's so much 0:28:04.200 --> 0:28:07.800 coming that's like great from gen Z. I think what's 0:28:07.840 --> 0:28:09.520 happening too with gen Z is that gen Z is 0:28:09.560 --> 0:28:11.840 like way over correcting millennials. 0:28:11.359 --> 0:28:13.359 Like over correcting. What what did we do? Like we 0:28:13.400 --> 0:28:15.600 were boundaries side parts. 0:28:16.359 --> 0:28:18.920 No, like think about like even something like boundaries, right, 0:28:18.960 --> 0:28:22.359 We're like that wasn't really talked about in generations prior 0:28:22.440 --> 0:28:24.800 to millennials, right, And then like I feel like gen 0:28:24.920 --> 0:28:27.480 Z really took boundaries and ran with it so much 0:28:27.480 --> 0:28:29.600 so to the point where like they are losing all 0:28:29.640 --> 0:28:32.240 of their friendships by way of having quote boundaries, but 0:28:32.280 --> 0:28:34.160 really they're just being selfish and not wanting to show 0:28:34.200 --> 0:28:36.119 up for other people or like being a part of 0:28:36.160 --> 0:28:38.520 a village, Like they don't want to do that. I 0:28:38.520 --> 0:28:40.520 honestly think that they see to respect each other more 0:28:40.560 --> 0:28:41.400 because like I. 0:28:41.320 --> 0:28:42.880 Agree, I think that's what it is a lot to 0:28:42.920 --> 0:28:43.440 learn from it. 0:28:43.520 --> 0:28:46.720 Exactly, and like millennials paved the way. Have some respect 0:28:47.040 --> 0:28:49.760 and gen Z like isn't dumb and lazy? Have some respect? 0:28:49.920 --> 0:28:51.560 You know what I mean? I think that's what it is. 0:28:51.840 --> 0:28:54.400 I think you guys know a lot more than we did. 0:28:54.600 --> 0:28:56.760 Do you think that's because of the amount of access 0:28:56.760 --> 0:28:57.880 we have, like medioized. 0:28:58.040 --> 0:29:00.920 I think the Internet held I think like what was 0:29:00.960 --> 0:29:04.880 formerly known as Twitter helped in some ways too, because 0:29:04.880 --> 0:29:07.920 you guys were like thinking in sound bites. You understood 0:29:07.920 --> 0:29:10.360 how to be concise, how to be clear. The idea 0:29:10.360 --> 0:29:14.080 of building a brand, which like every person is sort 0:29:14.080 --> 0:29:16.600 of a brand in some ways, is so clear to 0:29:16.640 --> 0:29:18.959 you guys. I think that's not just a therapy. 0:29:19.920 --> 0:29:20.040 Though. 0:29:20.040 --> 0:29:21.520 I have a hot take on boundaries. 0:29:21.960 --> 0:29:24.800 What do you think I don't love them, Okay. 0:29:25.120 --> 0:29:27.320 I think a lot of times when you are thinking 0:29:27.360 --> 0:29:29.400 about putting up a boundary, you're not coming from a 0:29:29.440 --> 0:29:32.480 place of love. Gary Zukov talks about it, and he 0:29:32.480 --> 0:29:34.960 can say it much more eloquently than I can. Listen. 0:29:35.000 --> 0:29:40.200 If something is super toxic or violent, that's not included. 0:29:41.080 --> 0:29:44.000 But like I tried putting up boundaries with my mom, 0:29:44.200 --> 0:29:46.680 and I have to tell you, I'm way happier just 0:29:46.800 --> 0:29:50.280 having things roll off my shoulder and laughing and being like, 0:29:50.360 --> 0:29:53.160 you're so nuts, I love you, instead of putting the 0:29:53.160 --> 0:29:55.520 boundary up and then being mad and not talking for 0:29:55.560 --> 0:29:55.920 a little. 0:29:56.240 --> 0:29:59.760 I think we use like therapy talk as like a 0:30:00.760 --> 0:30:02.880 which is quite literally the opposite of like what you're 0:30:02.920 --> 0:30:06.040 supposed to be doing. I think boundaries have a place, 0:30:06.200 --> 0:30:10.200 and I think they're good in areas. I really do 0:30:10.280 --> 0:30:13.560 think we just have become too self focused and we 0:30:13.680 --> 0:30:17.240 don't prioritize our relationship with other people nearly as much 0:30:17.240 --> 0:30:20.160 as we should. Showing up in actually having long lasting 0:30:20.160 --> 0:30:23.920 friendships and relationships in close family relationships does come at 0:30:23.920 --> 0:30:26.440 a cost, Like you do have to make sacrifices, you 0:30:26.480 --> 0:30:28.360 do have to be uncomfortable, you do have to put 0:30:28.400 --> 0:30:29.440 your stuff on the back burner. 0:30:29.520 --> 0:30:30.400 I don't think it's just bounding. 0:30:30.480 --> 0:30:32.600 I think it's therapy speak in general, and I think 0:30:32.600 --> 0:30:36.640 it's really weaponized in order to like validate our emotions 0:30:36.920 --> 0:30:39.920 versus actually like process them and work through it and 0:30:39.960 --> 0:30:42.400 get to the other side. I think instead, more often 0:30:42.440 --> 0:30:45.160 than not, what's happening is that people are using their 0:30:45.160 --> 0:30:48.800 therapists and their therapy speak to like reiterate their point 0:30:48.920 --> 0:30:51.280 that they're right and everyone else is wrong around them. 0:30:51.560 --> 0:30:53.360 I think that's really what's happening, and I think it's 0:30:53.480 --> 0:30:56.640 detrimental to our relationships. And that's why we have this 0:30:56.720 --> 0:31:01.000 like loneliness epidemic because people are not willing to be 0:31:01.040 --> 0:31:02.800 a friend. They want all of it, but they don't 0:31:02.800 --> 0:31:04.320 want to do it themselves. 0:31:04.320 --> 0:31:06.880 So interesting you say that, I saw this woman Moe 0:31:06.920 --> 0:31:09.800 Digs put up a video where she said that when 0:31:09.800 --> 0:31:12.800 you see a woman who's like throwing a dinner or 0:31:13.280 --> 0:31:15.680 any event and you see a lot of people show up, 0:31:16.240 --> 0:31:19.719 know that that's a woman who has shown up a 0:31:19.760 --> 0:31:22.320 lot of times, who has said no to herself sometimes 0:31:22.360 --> 0:31:24.760 in order to say yes to other people. And I 0:31:24.800 --> 0:31:27.680 do think that's the case sometimes. 0:31:27.560 --> 0:31:29.800 And I think you just have to find the right 0:31:29.840 --> 0:31:31.880 people to show up for so it doesn't feel like 0:31:31.920 --> 0:31:32.520 it's a cost. 0:31:32.680 --> 0:31:32.880 Yeah. 0:31:32.960 --> 0:31:36.120 Yeah, like you can't do that for everyone in your life. 0:31:36.160 --> 0:31:39.040 So like there is a quote boundary when it comes 0:31:39.080 --> 0:31:40.160 to like certain people. 0:31:39.960 --> 0:31:42.360 Who are just not the inner circle. 0:31:42.560 --> 0:31:44.880 Yeah, I think that that's what it is. I think 0:31:44.880 --> 0:31:47.840 with their inner circle, it's of course like in good health. 0:31:47.880 --> 0:31:50.000 But I think that the conversation needs to here on 0:31:50.080 --> 0:31:51.680 like showing up for people and being there and being 0:31:51.680 --> 0:31:53.760 a friend versus like how to have boundaries. 0:31:53.760 --> 0:31:56.200 Also, people aren't perfect. Let's like relax a little bit. 0:31:56.520 --> 0:31:59.360 I feel like you go with your gut, like you 0:31:59.400 --> 0:32:02.040 go with your intuition a lot. How do you determine 0:32:02.080 --> 0:32:04.040 what's intuition versus what's anxiety? 0:32:04.320 --> 0:32:05.880 Oh my god, this has been the question I've asked 0:32:05.880 --> 0:32:07.400 myself my entire life. 0:32:07.840 --> 0:32:09.880 I think one of them is louder for me. 0:32:10.440 --> 0:32:13.520 What I've realized is that for so long, I was 0:32:13.560 --> 0:32:16.040 so busy listening to everyone else's voice in my life 0:32:16.080 --> 0:32:18.240 and not my own, and I didn't even have like 0:32:18.280 --> 0:32:20.400 a relationship with myself. I didn't know what I wanted 0:32:20.400 --> 0:32:22.880 because I'd relied on everyone else to tell me. So 0:32:23.080 --> 0:32:26.200 I started spending a lot of time alone. I started journaling. 0:32:26.200 --> 0:32:28.480 Even when I was obsessed with self help, I was 0:32:28.520 --> 0:32:31.720 still listening to all the outside voices. So I had 0:32:31.760 --> 0:32:34.560 to almost like try a little less and just get 0:32:34.680 --> 0:32:38.360 quiet and get to know my voice better or like 0:32:38.400 --> 0:32:40.440 what I believe to be like God's voice or whatever. 0:32:41.040 --> 0:32:43.640 I had to spend time alone and get to know 0:32:43.680 --> 0:32:46.960 myself to even understand that. I also kind of want 0:32:46.960 --> 0:32:48.360 to say it's like ones out of fear and the 0:32:48.360 --> 0:32:50.720 other one isn't. But I think fear and being scared 0:32:50.800 --> 0:32:53.200 or different, Like I think anxiety is out of fear. 0:32:53.400 --> 0:32:55.520 You can have a gut feeling and be nervous, and 0:32:55.560 --> 0:32:58.480 you can be scared. But I think when you're making 0:32:58.480 --> 0:33:01.000 a decision out of fear, you're making it out of 0:33:01.040 --> 0:33:02.080 like feeling insecure. 0:33:02.400 --> 0:33:03.360 I don't think there's. 0:33:03.160 --> 0:33:05.840 Like one easy blanket answer, but I do think a 0:33:05.840 --> 0:33:07.600 lot of it comes from like getting quiet. 0:33:07.680 --> 0:33:08.560 I think a lot of our. 0:33:08.480 --> 0:33:11.080 Answers in life come from like just being quiet with yourself, 0:33:11.120 --> 0:33:12.680 which is the last thing that any of us want 0:33:12.720 --> 0:33:12.920 to do. 0:33:13.400 --> 0:33:15.440 So it's not the fun answer, but I think for 0:33:15.600 --> 0:33:16.600 me that's what's. 0:33:16.400 --> 0:33:19.680 Worked me too. That's why, like we always get good 0:33:19.680 --> 0:33:22.400 ideas in the car and the shower. It's not like 0:33:22.600 --> 0:33:24.880 a coincidence. It's places where we either don't have our 0:33:24.920 --> 0:33:27.520 phone or we're quiet. Yeah, friend of Mine feels like 0:33:27.560 --> 0:33:31.000 such a natural extension of your aesthetic and your values. 0:33:31.360 --> 0:33:33.240 What was the first seed of the idea? 0:33:33.400 --> 0:33:37.520 I had wanted to do a recipe journal for like 0:33:37.600 --> 0:33:40.160 the podcast merch years ago, and I kept saying, like 0:33:40.200 --> 0:33:41.720 we need to do recpee journals. We need to do 0:33:41.760 --> 0:33:44.120 recipe journals, and like with merch, you can't really just 0:33:44.200 --> 0:33:45.360 create a full product. 0:33:45.440 --> 0:33:46.640 That's not really how that works. 0:33:46.960 --> 0:33:48.440 So what's a recipe journal. 0:33:48.520 --> 0:33:50.440 It's a journal for recipes, so like you fill in 0:33:50.440 --> 0:33:51.240 your own recipe. 0:33:51.320 --> 0:33:51.840 Oh cool. 0:33:51.880 --> 0:33:54.440 So that was like our very first product and that's 0:33:54.440 --> 0:33:57.440 what I really wanted to do. And over time then 0:33:57.440 --> 0:34:00.640 I got really into hosting and I really want like 0:34:00.680 --> 0:34:03.800 a tabletop line. There was just so many things, and 0:34:03.840 --> 0:34:06.480 then as time went on, I started to. 0:34:06.400 --> 0:34:08.040 Think, this is a brand. This isn't just like a 0:34:08.080 --> 0:34:09.120 single merch product. 0:34:09.760 --> 0:34:12.200 So it really started from there, and I had a 0:34:12.239 --> 0:34:16.399 brand before that we had shut down. And looking back now, 0:34:16.440 --> 0:34:19.360 if I could tell myself, like I knew that it 0:34:19.400 --> 0:34:21.000 wasn't what I was supposed to be doing, but I 0:34:21.120 --> 0:34:22.960 was people pleasing, which is so unlike me. I'm not 0:34:22.960 --> 0:34:25.480 a people The day it launched, I was like, I 0:34:25.560 --> 0:34:27.000 just don't think this is the right fit. 0:34:27.239 --> 0:34:29.759 And again it goes back to I just thought I 0:34:29.840 --> 0:34:30.360 was nervous. 0:34:30.400 --> 0:34:32.440 I thought I was just afraid because I couldn't tell 0:34:32.560 --> 0:34:35.440 if it was anxiety or if it was a gut feeling, 0:34:35.600 --> 0:34:37.600 and I felt like it was anxiety. The whole time. 0:34:37.680 --> 0:34:39.360 Looking back now, I now see that it was a 0:34:39.400 --> 0:34:41.920 gut feeling. We did that for about a year and 0:34:41.920 --> 0:34:44.080 then we just wanted different things, so we ended up 0:34:44.480 --> 0:34:47.600 shutting that down. And literally the day that we closed 0:34:47.640 --> 0:34:50.120 that company, or we decided that we were going to close, 0:34:50.600 --> 0:34:53.880 I had one thousand ideas and I was like alive again, 0:34:53.920 --> 0:34:56.279 and I was so excited, and I'd already contacted so 0:34:56.320 --> 0:34:58.440 many people about logos and brandings and websites. 0:34:58.480 --> 0:35:00.160 I just like knew that that was when I was 0:35:00.239 --> 0:35:00.440 to do. 0:35:00.920 --> 0:35:04.080 But looking back, that was my biggest lesson and like 0:35:04.120 --> 0:35:06.040 that was an anxiety, that was a gut feeling, but 0:35:06.120 --> 0:35:08.880 I was ignoring myself because I didn't want to disappoint 0:35:08.920 --> 0:35:10.520 people around me, which is not their fault. 0:35:10.520 --> 0:35:14.200 Like that was completely me. But now I know. 0:35:14.600 --> 0:35:16.120 Now you know that you're Martha Stewart. 0:35:16.280 --> 0:35:30.120 No, and now like I want to be Martha Stewart. 0:35:31.320 --> 0:35:34.840 What's been the most unexpected challenge to launching a brand? 0:35:35.600 --> 0:35:37.640 I don't even think anything unexpected. 0:35:37.800 --> 0:35:40.680 I think it's just hard, Like it's so hard, it's 0:35:40.760 --> 0:35:43.319 so hard, and it wasn't something that I didn't know 0:35:43.400 --> 0:35:44.040 going into it. 0:35:44.160 --> 0:35:46.000 I'm trying to think of something. 0:35:45.960 --> 0:35:48.279 I shouldn't say it's so hard it takes everything out 0:35:48.320 --> 0:35:48.520 of you. 0:35:48.840 --> 0:35:50.960 Yeah, I agree with that because I don't feel like 0:35:51.840 --> 0:35:54.760 what I'm doing is killing me, because it's like giving 0:35:54.800 --> 0:35:58.120 me energy because I love it. But it's not an 0:35:58.120 --> 0:36:00.560 easy thing. But I think that just shows like I'm 0:36:00.600 --> 0:36:02.279 doing what I meant to be doing. And I feel 0:36:02.320 --> 0:36:04.200 the way about all of my friends who are entrepreneurs. 0:36:04.360 --> 0:36:06.480 It's like the hours and the amount of like blood, 0:36:06.480 --> 0:36:08.759 sweat and tears, and I'm financing all of it, like 0:36:08.840 --> 0:36:11.680 all my money. Everything comes back to me like if 0:36:11.680 --> 0:36:15.080 we're not paying. It's a lot of like mental energy. 0:36:15.640 --> 0:36:17.920 But I just love it so much that I don't 0:36:18.000 --> 0:36:19.200 feel dreamed from it. 0:36:19.480 --> 0:36:22.800 When I launched Question Everything, I only ordered two hundred 0:36:22.880 --> 0:36:24.680 card games because I was so nervous no one would 0:36:24.719 --> 0:36:26.480 buy them. And I thought, well, at least I could 0:36:26.520 --> 0:36:28.560 sell two hundred to friends and family. I know two 0:36:28.600 --> 0:36:30.479 hundred people that could buy a card game, I think. 0:36:30.840 --> 0:36:34.040 And on Shopify, which is a website where you sell things, 0:36:34.080 --> 0:36:36.000 you can see all the orders that come in, and 0:36:36.080 --> 0:36:39.520 so I go live. I put the video up on 0:36:39.560 --> 0:36:41.760 Instagram and you hear the little. 0:36:41.640 --> 0:36:43.160 King kuching like those things. 0:36:43.239 --> 0:36:45.839 It's the best sound on shopify right, and I look 0:36:45.920 --> 0:36:47.640 to see who bought them. First of all, my mom 0:36:47.680 --> 0:36:50.560 didn't buy one, none of my family members bought them, 0:36:50.880 --> 0:36:53.400 none of my good friends bought them. The first I 0:36:53.440 --> 0:36:57.520 would say thirty to forty people who bought were female entrepreneurs, 0:36:57.560 --> 0:36:59.480 some of them that I knew well, some that I 0:36:59.520 --> 0:37:03.439 didn't know all. And I knew in that moment why 0:37:03.480 --> 0:37:05.279 they bought the card game, and it was because they 0:37:05.360 --> 0:37:08.759 knew how hard it was to do anything, you know, 0:37:09.040 --> 0:37:11.640 and they had respect. So now when anybody I know 0:37:11.719 --> 0:37:13.960 launches anything, even if I don't want it, I'll gift 0:37:14.000 --> 0:37:15.640 it Sam I'm their first fire. 0:37:16.200 --> 0:37:20.520 I buy anything anyone launches, like I am always buying it. 0:37:21.160 --> 0:37:23.640 I feel that it's never the people closest to you 0:37:23.680 --> 0:37:26.200 that are really like the most supportive with your business. 0:37:26.640 --> 0:37:29.040 It's always the people who are like almost like two 0:37:29.040 --> 0:37:32.080 people remove. Yeah, like not so close, but they are 0:37:32.080 --> 0:37:35.840 the most supportive, especially people who understand building a small business. 0:37:36.000 --> 0:37:38.400 I have this hosting closet that's like this really really 0:37:38.440 --> 0:37:40.000 extra closet where I keep all of. 0:37:39.960 --> 0:37:42.600 Myself to host. In this closet, it's wallpaper. 0:37:42.640 --> 0:37:44.960 By the way, I have a cookbook wall and I 0:37:45.040 --> 0:37:46.799 keep like recipe journals there, and I keep a bunch 0:37:46.840 --> 0:37:47.520 of cookbooks. 0:37:47.600 --> 0:37:50.160 And I saw that I had like. 0:37:50.080 --> 0:37:53.600 A Wishbone kitchen cookbook and it was like a paper cookbook. 0:37:53.600 --> 0:37:55.279 And I'm like, when did I get that? I happen 0:37:55.320 --> 0:37:57.000 to see because she just launched a new cookbook. 0:37:57.040 --> 0:38:00.640 She made a video saying forever ago I published my 0:38:00.719 --> 0:38:01.880 own cookbook. 0:38:01.920 --> 0:38:03.000 I bought five hundred copies. 0:38:03.040 --> 0:38:04.560 I did it on TikTok, and like, now it's so 0:38:04.600 --> 0:38:07.160 crazy because now I'm doing this whole cookbook and I'm 0:38:07.200 --> 0:38:07.800 so excited about it. 0:38:07.800 --> 0:38:09.600 Now She's a New York Times bestsellert launch last week. 0:38:09.600 --> 0:38:10.520 I don't even know her about. 0:38:10.320 --> 0:38:12.960 The way the people literally never spoken and so I 0:38:13.040 --> 0:38:15.319 guess years ago I didn't connect the doss with that 0:38:15.360 --> 0:38:17.279 was her cause I wasn't like actively following. 0:38:17.000 --> 0:38:17.560 At that point. 0:38:18.000 --> 0:38:21.800 I just saw this girl on TikTok with this cookbook 0:38:21.840 --> 0:38:24.400 and I bought it. But like that is a female entrepreneur, 0:38:24.440 --> 0:38:27.120 Like you are just constantly buying things because like I've 0:38:27.160 --> 0:38:29.680 sold so much products in the past, Like I understand it. 0:38:29.920 --> 0:38:31.560 So I am like the first to. 0:38:31.600 --> 0:38:36.319 Buy yep, always always. I don't know a lot about 0:38:36.320 --> 0:38:39.000 hosting the only things I know are from Prea Parker's 0:38:39.040 --> 0:38:41.719 book The Art of Gathering. She taught me that it's 0:38:41.760 --> 0:38:43.600 not good to be a lazy host, which I think 0:38:43.640 --> 0:38:45.439 I used to be in the past because I thought 0:38:45.440 --> 0:38:47.600 I was a chill host. Okay, I thought I was. 0:38:47.560 --> 0:38:50.120 Like, where whatever you want, I don't care where you sit. 0:38:50.440 --> 0:38:53.800 And Priya Parker taught me no, like rules are actually 0:38:53.800 --> 0:38:56.680 a gift to people when you're hosting. What is your 0:38:56.680 --> 0:38:58.360 best lazy girl hosting tip? 0:38:58.800 --> 0:38:59.240 A theme? 0:38:59.640 --> 0:39:02.360 I think theme saves to day and it makes people 0:39:02.400 --> 0:39:05.440 get so much more involved in it. Most recently, I've 0:39:05.440 --> 0:39:07.520 been going through and hosting a dinner party to every 0:39:07.600 --> 0:39:11.120 Nancy Meyers movie and it's been so fun because people 0:39:11.160 --> 0:39:13.239 come and they dress up as characters. And I say 0:39:13.320 --> 0:39:15.880 lazy because like it is lazy, Like you have a 0:39:15.920 --> 0:39:18.000 theme and then everything is kind of set for you. 0:39:18.040 --> 0:39:20.440 It makes it easier on you, makes it easier on 0:39:20.480 --> 0:39:20.880 the guest. 0:39:21.440 --> 0:39:25.040 And we actually started with Christmas time. During Christmas, I 0:39:25.040 --> 0:39:27.319 did a dinner party that was a holiday theme, which 0:39:27.360 --> 0:39:29.680 is my favorite movie ever, and it was so fun, 0:39:29.719 --> 0:39:31.360 like all of us came dressed up as like different 0:39:31.440 --> 0:39:33.799 characters and we had like Christmas Betta. 0:39:33.600 --> 0:39:36.279 Chini and I had Aveline wine because that's Cameron Tino's's wine. 0:39:36.280 --> 0:39:38.880 Like it was so fun and it does feel like 0:39:38.880 --> 0:39:41.840 you're going the extra step, but really it's lazy because 0:39:42.040 --> 0:39:45.600 everything's planned for you. Like you actually have like structure, 0:39:45.760 --> 0:39:48.120 and your guests are more likely to get into. 0:39:47.920 --> 0:39:48.840 It when they have a theme. 0:39:49.000 --> 0:39:51.880 Okay, I like that you have a template almost literally. 0:39:51.920 --> 0:39:54.200 We actually on the front of my website we have 0:39:54.200 --> 0:39:56.239 one hundred hosting theme ideas that you can just like 0:39:56.239 --> 0:39:59.160 download because I'm so aboptionate about themes, Like it makes 0:39:59.200 --> 0:40:02.040 it so much easier, especially when you're in your twenties, 0:40:02.080 --> 0:40:04.840 Like your friends don't really know how to be a guest. 0:40:04.960 --> 0:40:06.160 Like you can tell who grew up in like a 0:40:06.200 --> 0:40:08.680 southern home or like a mom that hosts based on 0:40:08.760 --> 0:40:10.840 like when they're coming out, like immediately, I can tell, 0:40:11.120 --> 0:40:13.560 but they don't really like, Oh tell me, they're bringing 0:40:13.600 --> 0:40:15.640 a host of skifts. Okay, they're saying thank you so much, 0:40:15.680 --> 0:40:18.400 they're bringing things. They'll never just show up. They're always 0:40:18.440 --> 0:40:20.680 on time. I never really cared about that. 0:40:20.800 --> 0:40:22.440 This is something I like to do. But you can 0:40:22.480 --> 0:40:22.920 tell like. 0:40:22.920 --> 0:40:26.240 Immediately, like always, what's your favorite host of skiff. 0:40:26.800 --> 0:40:30.440 Okay, I personally like love a candle because I'm always 0:40:30.480 --> 0:40:31.320 burning candles. 0:40:31.400 --> 0:40:32.399 I love an olive oil. 0:40:32.480 --> 0:40:34.400 I love love it all oil. I think Friend of 0:40:34.400 --> 0:40:36.680 Mine's a perfect toasting gifts. Actually those are the best, 0:40:37.160 --> 0:40:39.480 but I think olive oil. And I also love flowers, 0:40:39.480 --> 0:40:40.800 like I love getting flowers. 0:40:40.920 --> 0:40:42.760 That's nice, So I think that those are sweet. 0:40:42.800 --> 0:40:44.560 I heard Ina Garden say this once, and I think 0:40:44.560 --> 0:40:46.359 it's such a good tip when it comes to hosting gift. 0:40:46.680 --> 0:40:48.200 Don't bring anything. 0:40:48.280 --> 0:40:50.320 As a gift that you were running out and served 0:40:50.360 --> 0:40:52.800 that night, because it's an extra responsibility on the host 0:40:53.120 --> 0:40:54.880 and it's like ruining kind of like they're like function 0:40:55.239 --> 0:40:59.280 unless you bring it and it's already plated and ready 0:40:59.280 --> 0:41:01.000 to go and you don't even needs to grab anything 0:41:01.040 --> 0:41:04.240 from them. I think true good hostess gift is something 0:41:04.320 --> 0:41:05.720 that they are. 0:41:05.600 --> 0:41:06.399 Going to use later. 0:41:06.640 --> 0:41:12.600 Yeah, I agree with you. Something Martha Stewart taught you. 0:41:12.840 --> 0:41:14.759 Oh my god, I mean literally everything. 0:41:15.600 --> 0:41:19.319 She is such a trailblazer and just does not care, 0:41:19.520 --> 0:41:22.919 like truly truly does not care and just like does 0:41:22.960 --> 0:41:27.000 whatever she wants. I think Martha Stewart has just taught me, 0:41:27.280 --> 0:41:30.920 in probably millions of other women, like how to evolve 0:41:31.360 --> 0:41:34.520 because she published her first cookbook at forty one. It 0:41:34.600 --> 0:41:37.480 was not a cookbook, it was an entertaining book, and 0:41:38.280 --> 0:41:39.960 used to work on Wall Street. She left, she started 0:41:39.960 --> 0:41:42.480 a catering business, then she launched this book, and then 0:41:42.520 --> 0:41:44.319 I mean, you know, she's had prison time, she had 0:41:44.360 --> 0:41:47.720 many different eras, and like she's consistently evolving and evolving 0:41:47.719 --> 0:41:50.279 with the times, and I just love that. Like, I 0:41:50.280 --> 0:41:52.280 feel like she's at the peak of her career eighty, 0:41:52.360 --> 0:41:54.399 which is incredible, and. 0:41:54.320 --> 0:41:56.160 She doesn't let like age. 0:41:55.960 --> 0:41:58.040 Or anything take her out, Like she's just going till 0:41:58.040 --> 0:42:00.480 the end of time, which I really respect and I 0:42:00.480 --> 0:42:02.520 think is very cool because especially as women, you feel 0:42:02.520 --> 0:42:05.440 like you have like a ticking clock, whether it's fertility 0:42:05.760 --> 0:42:07.760 or age that you can be on camera or whatever 0:42:07.800 --> 0:42:08.000 it is. 0:42:08.040 --> 0:42:09.800 And like Martha has defied all those. 0:42:09.640 --> 0:42:13.319 Odds, and I just think that's so cool, especially she's 0:42:13.440 --> 0:42:14.920 so ahead of her time for that. 0:42:15.320 --> 0:42:15.799 I love that. 0:42:15.880 --> 0:42:17.799 You love older women so much. 0:42:17.840 --> 0:42:20.280 I'm obsessed with them, Yeah, literally obsessed. 0:42:20.560 --> 0:42:22.719 Finish this sentence. The older I get, the more I 0:42:22.800 --> 0:42:25.799 realize I know nothing a book that changed your life 0:42:25.880 --> 0:42:27.560 something you think everybody should read. 0:42:27.440 --> 0:42:29.520 The Gap and The Gain, The what the gap and 0:42:29.560 --> 0:42:31.840 the gain. I've never had a chancel of that. It's amazing. 0:42:31.920 --> 0:42:34.520 It's amazing if you are an Enneagram three and over achiever, 0:42:34.719 --> 0:42:38.160 first daughter, and it talks about why you never feel 0:42:38.160 --> 0:42:40.839 like you're doing enough or achieving enough or producing enough 0:42:40.920 --> 0:42:42.920 or whatever. Like it teaches you how to live from 0:42:42.960 --> 0:42:45.600 the gain versus the gap. It's so good, incredible. 0:42:45.800 --> 0:42:48.040 As an oldest daughter, I need to read. Okay, one 0:42:48.040 --> 0:42:49.600 thing every woman should try once. 0:42:50.520 --> 0:42:52.919 Oh my gosh, what would you say? 0:42:53.360 --> 0:42:56.440 An incredible love affair, Like even if it's for a weekend. 0:42:56.800 --> 0:42:57.320 I agree. 0:42:57.400 --> 0:42:59.120 I think you should, like go to Europe and just 0:42:59.120 --> 0:43:01.440 like have a time, just have a time, just have 0:43:01.480 --> 0:43:03.319 a time. I'm trying to think of something I've actually done. 0:43:03.440 --> 0:43:05.800 I think spending an extended period of time. It doesn't 0:43:05.800 --> 0:43:07.560 even necessarily have to be a move, but like, if 0:43:07.560 --> 0:43:10.360 you really like a location, I think just spending a 0:43:10.400 --> 0:43:12.440 month there, Like maybe you fall in love, just do 0:43:12.520 --> 0:43:15.000 something by yourself, Like I think that a month alone 0:43:15.160 --> 0:43:16.240 will change your life. 0:43:16.400 --> 0:43:18.520 I like that you said alone time. You can even 0:43:18.520 --> 0:43:20.960 do it if you're in a relationship with somebody totally, 0:43:21.200 --> 0:43:26.080 but like go for two weeks to a different location alone, yeah, yeah, okay, 0:43:26.120 --> 0:43:28.479 grab the question everything card game, pick a card. 0:43:28.680 --> 0:43:33.560 Okay, what's your all time most memorable meal. I'm shockingly 0:43:33.600 --> 0:43:35.920 not a foodie. Isn't that insane because I love. 0:43:35.760 --> 0:43:38.320 Cooking, Okay, but I don't actually mean the food. 0:43:38.360 --> 0:43:39.200 That's a dinner. 0:43:39.360 --> 0:43:41.960 Yeah, like the vibe which feels so right for you. 0:43:42.480 --> 0:43:46.920 I hosted this dinner party once and it was last summer. 0:43:47.239 --> 0:43:49.760 I always had like a Nancy Meyer's playlist in the background. 0:43:49.760 --> 0:43:52.400 It was like a summer theme when we're talking. And 0:43:52.560 --> 0:43:54.840 it was a really small, intimate group of girls. I 0:43:54.920 --> 0:43:56.560 love to invite people over that I don't know, like, 0:43:56.600 --> 0:43:59.080 I think it's really cool to get like recommendations from 0:43:59.120 --> 0:43:59.560 other people. 0:43:59.560 --> 0:44:01.520 I think it just makes like hosting so much more fun. 0:44:01.960 --> 0:44:03.879 These were all girls that i'd really kind of just met, 0:44:04.040 --> 0:44:05.799 and they're all telling the stories about how they met 0:44:05.800 --> 0:44:08.560 their husband and they're significant others or crazy things that 0:44:08.560 --> 0:44:10.719 have happened in their life. And one of them was 0:44:10.760 --> 0:44:13.399 telling this like beautiful story. It was an insane story 0:44:13.400 --> 0:44:15.600 of how she met her husband. And as she's telling 0:44:15.600 --> 0:44:18.480 the story, the music it all like movie scoring. It's 0:44:18.520 --> 0:44:20.719 getting louder and louder. It's like as she's telling this 0:44:20.840 --> 0:44:23.520 like beautiful story. The music's in the backgroundight, like literally 0:44:23.560 --> 0:44:25.080 felt like you were in a movie. I think about that, 0:44:25.080 --> 0:44:26.160 like every time I my dining. 0:44:26.040 --> 0:44:27.040 In it was crescendoing. 0:44:27.200 --> 0:44:30.000 Yes, it was so crazy and it really felt like 0:44:30.560 --> 0:44:31.320 it was a movie. 0:44:31.480 --> 0:44:32.960 I definitely have a better one that's like more like 0:44:33.080 --> 0:44:33.800 life teaching. 0:44:33.880 --> 0:44:35.440 All though, that was a perfect answer. 0:44:35.440 --> 0:44:47.560 You don't need another one. 0:44:49.600 --> 0:44:51.880 Throw the cards back, and we're going to play a 0:44:51.920 --> 0:44:54.719 game called host with the Most. Okay, I'm going to 0:44:54.800 --> 0:44:57.880 name a hosting situation. You have to answer really fast. 0:44:58.200 --> 0:45:01.160 What would you either do, serve or say? Okay, okay. 0:45:01.239 --> 0:45:03.719 You're hosting a last minute dinner party. What's your go to. 0:45:03.800 --> 0:45:05.560 Dish in a garden? Engagement Chicken? 0:45:05.800 --> 0:45:07.920 Three people dead are alive that you'd see at your 0:45:08.000 --> 0:45:09.200 dream dinner table. 0:45:09.160 --> 0:45:12.760 Dolly Parton, Martha Stewart in a garden. But I would 0:45:12.760 --> 0:45:14.800 put Martha and I on all of a sudden, Actually no, 0:45:14.800 --> 0:45:17.040 I wouldn't. I put them together make it more entertaining. 0:45:17.520 --> 0:45:20.200 You're curating a playlist. What's song number one? 0:45:20.600 --> 0:45:24.040 Anything on a Nancy Meyer's playlist? Like I'm always playing 0:45:24.120 --> 0:45:26.440 Nancy Meyer's playlist and they haven Nancy Myers playlist. By 0:45:26.440 --> 0:45:30.160 the way, for everything, bridal showers, parties, bachelorettes, there's music 0:45:30.200 --> 0:45:31.000 morning like all of it. 0:45:31.760 --> 0:45:35.520 What's one thing that instantly elevates a table, dim lit candles, 0:45:36.040 --> 0:45:38.799 a hosting ick, people who flay right before? What's your 0:45:38.800 --> 0:45:39.600 signature drink? 0:45:39.960 --> 0:45:43.200 I've recently gotten really into an ininegarden Cosmo, which I 0:45:43.320 --> 0:45:44.520 was not into them before. 0:45:45.080 --> 0:45:47.920 Okay, this works exactly for you because you just did this. 0:45:48.000 --> 0:45:50.520 You're in charge of a bridal shower activity. What are 0:45:50.520 --> 0:45:50.919 you doing? 0:45:51.200 --> 0:45:53.759 I think showers in general are like pretty chuggy like 0:45:54.040 --> 0:45:56.040 and they're not very fine then like chegi is a 0:45:56.080 --> 0:45:57.880 chegy word now I understand that, but there's no other 0:45:57.920 --> 0:46:00.640 way to describe that. No, I agree, and like, no 0:46:00.680 --> 0:46:02.640 one actually has fun as a showers. I think we 0:46:02.680 --> 0:46:05.719 should like ban showers and do dinner parties and just 0:46:05.800 --> 0:46:08.360 change it as a whole. I'm meant, please, I'm like 0:46:08.360 --> 0:46:10.120 throwing a baby shower right now, and we're like having 0:46:10.120 --> 0:46:10.759 the hardest time. 0:46:11.120 --> 0:46:13.440 There's definitely like cute things here. 0:46:13.600 --> 0:46:16.160 Baby showers are easier. Bridal showers are really hard to 0:46:16.200 --> 0:46:17.720 make fun and not choogy. 0:46:18.080 --> 0:46:20.799 They're literally so hard and also wires in the middle 0:46:20.800 --> 0:46:22.600 of the dam. I'm so tired, and then you have 0:46:22.640 --> 0:46:25.120 to have bright lighting. They're just not fun to do. 0:46:25.200 --> 0:46:26.839 Clean up as people are there? Do you wait till 0:46:26.840 --> 0:46:27.480 everyone's gone? 0:46:27.680 --> 0:46:30.440 I wait till everyone's gone. It's rude to start cleaning before. 0:46:30.880 --> 0:46:33.120 It's different when people because I have friends who will 0:46:33.120 --> 0:46:34.520 just stay for hours, so like please just like help 0:46:34.520 --> 0:46:35.759 me clean, Like that's one thing. 0:46:35.800 --> 0:46:36.520 But I wait for. 0:46:36.480 --> 0:46:38.879 Everyone to leave before because once you start cleaning, that's 0:46:38.880 --> 0:46:40.319 a sign that you want them to leave, and like 0:46:40.360 --> 0:46:43.120 I don't want them to leave, so you shouldn't do that. 0:46:43.360 --> 0:46:44.720 Is there like an etiquette book? 0:46:44.880 --> 0:46:46.719 I would say the art of gathering is one like 0:46:46.719 --> 0:46:48.120 you don't want your dinner party to end. 0:46:48.080 --> 0:46:50.480 By like nine pm. I hate when I spend like 0:46:50.480 --> 0:46:52.399 a week on a dinner party. I'm doing this whole thing, 0:46:52.680 --> 0:46:55.160 and then a friend is like, I'm tired. All right, guys, 0:46:55.200 --> 0:46:57.279 we're done, and it's like you're done, not everyone else. 0:46:57.320 --> 0:46:58.600 I just think it's so rude, Like I. 0:46:58.520 --> 0:47:01.839 Think that's such a faux pa. I hate it. 0:47:01.920 --> 0:47:04.520 I think it is so rude, Like it actually makes 0:47:04.560 --> 0:47:06.839 me so angry. I'm like, I've spent all this time, 0:47:06.960 --> 0:47:09.040 Like you don't want a dinner party to end by nine, 0:47:09.080 --> 0:47:10.880 Like that's not the sign of a good dinner party. 0:47:11.239 --> 0:47:13.600 But like one person can ruin it, Like one person 0:47:13.640 --> 0:47:15.640 can be like I'm leaving, we should all go because 0:47:15.640 --> 0:47:17.000 like they don't want to miss out on something. 0:47:16.960 --> 0:47:19.080 Like that is so rude. Trys me insane. 0:47:19.200 --> 0:47:22.960 Okay, this is a podcast speed round. This is social only, 0:47:23.320 --> 0:47:27.200 no overthinking, fast answers already. What's the worst thing someone 0:47:27.200 --> 0:47:30.360 can do on the mic e best icebreaker question? 0:47:30.600 --> 0:47:32.879 You know, what is a question that I like? It's 0:47:32.920 --> 0:47:35.240 not really an icebreaker, but I think like best purchase 0:47:35.239 --> 0:47:37.120 you've made under fifty dollars in the past month, And 0:47:37.120 --> 0:47:37.959 that's such a fun one. 0:47:38.000 --> 0:47:41.040 It's a good tim Ferris okay. Most underrated podcast guest 0:47:41.120 --> 0:47:44.200 trait someone who like answers beyond the question. I think 0:47:44.280 --> 0:47:45.960 is like the best kind of guest you can get. 0:47:46.040 --> 0:47:47.600 So when you're interviewing. 0:47:47.200 --> 0:47:48.799 Them and they answer and they're just like smiling at 0:47:48.840 --> 0:47:50.240 the end, it's like make it more of a conversation, 0:47:50.400 --> 0:47:51.600 loosen up a little bit, you know. 0:47:51.800 --> 0:47:56.080 I agree, like yes, anding, yes, Okay. Most overused podcast 0:47:56.120 --> 0:47:58.600 phrase that you hear probably everything that I say. 0:47:58.880 --> 0:48:03.759 Everyone's been asking. It's more of an influencer thing, but probably. 0:48:03.440 --> 0:48:05.920 That your personal podcast pet peeve. 0:48:06.400 --> 0:48:08.680 I hate when someone has a guest on and they 0:48:08.680 --> 0:48:10.200 ask all the same questions if they've been ask a 0:48:10.200 --> 0:48:12.600 million times, Like if you're asking a question you can google, like, 0:48:12.680 --> 0:48:14.160 you should not be doing that. 0:48:14.320 --> 0:48:16.600 One guest that made you totally rethink something. 0:48:17.040 --> 0:48:20.400 Susie Welch your go to listen World Tres's podcast my 0:48:20.520 --> 0:48:21.200 all time favorite. 0:48:21.280 --> 0:48:22.560 I've like never missed an episode. 0:48:22.640 --> 0:48:25.520 Okay, one more host thing is this is just social 0:48:25.600 --> 0:48:28.439 this or that charcouterie board or full sit down meal, 0:48:28.920 --> 0:48:32.040 full sit down meal, game night or deep conversation. 0:48:31.719 --> 0:48:36.120 Deep conversation, please my god, man game nights unless it's Mojong. 0:48:35.840 --> 0:48:40.000 Gold flatware or vintage silver, vintage silver, wine and records, 0:48:40.080 --> 0:48:41.800 or Espresso Martinis in a playlist. 0:48:42.200 --> 0:48:45.319 Now espresso Martini is in a playlist host with a 0:48:45.320 --> 0:48:47.800 plan or host on vibes host with a plan. 0:48:48.400 --> 0:48:49.879 Take your shoes off or leave them on. 0:48:50.600 --> 0:48:53.160 Because I personally don't care at all that people have 0:48:53.200 --> 0:48:54.960 shoes on, but I think it's more comfortable and people 0:48:55.000 --> 0:48:55.520 take them off. 0:48:56.080 --> 0:49:01.000 Fresh flowers or candle overload, kindle overload, instagram lebill set 0:49:01.080 --> 0:49:02.120 up or cozy chaos. 0:49:02.400 --> 0:49:05.000 It's turo will set up. I guess Cosey chaos is 0:49:05.160 --> 0:49:07.200 just like you being a lazy host. And as we 0:49:07.239 --> 0:49:08.920 know from the art of gathering, you don't want that. 0:49:09.239 --> 0:49:10.600 No, you don't want to be a chill host. 0:49:10.680 --> 0:49:12.200 You know what. I love that she said in that book. 0:49:12.239 --> 0:49:15.120 Tell me, I am gonna misquote it, as I do 0:49:15.440 --> 0:49:18.400 literally everything that anyone's ever said in their life. She 0:49:18.520 --> 0:49:21.120 talks earlier on in the book about how you actually 0:49:21.200 --> 0:49:25.080 need to be exclusive and not invite everyone. I have 0:49:25.440 --> 0:49:27.480 noticed in myself that I've done at the service to 0:49:27.520 --> 0:49:30.480 my guests many times by inviting either too many people 0:49:30.560 --> 0:49:33.520 or being too welcoming, and I should have curated the 0:49:33.560 --> 0:49:36.080 crowd a little bit better. And I've learned that now 0:49:36.160 --> 0:49:38.920 at his table that I have handcrafted and the people 0:49:38.920 --> 0:49:41.360 that are invited are invited for a reason because I 0:49:41.400 --> 0:49:43.520 think that like one of them would like the other person, 0:49:43.560 --> 0:49:45.160 or they could learn something from each other, or they're 0:49:45.160 --> 0:49:47.640 in similar field, or they read similar books. Like who 0:49:47.760 --> 0:49:50.120 I invite to each dinner party is like a perfectly 0:49:50.120 --> 0:49:52.200 crafted thing, and I will not be inviting to everyone 0:49:52.200 --> 0:49:53.920 to everything anymore, because I think that that is like 0:49:53.920 --> 0:49:55.320 a side of a lazy host and I've been a 0:49:55.400 --> 0:49:56.279 lazy host. 0:49:56.400 --> 0:49:59.560 I don't think it's lazy because I think you and 0:49:59.600 --> 0:50:02.560 I share this. We don't like people feeling left out. Yeah, 0:50:02.600 --> 0:50:04.759 and so it's a more like a come one, come all. 0:50:04.880 --> 0:50:08.040 But when you're hosting a specific theme, it's hard. 0:50:08.040 --> 0:50:10.640 Totally and it makes people just like not as committed 0:50:10.719 --> 0:50:12.719 to like the night because they're like, oh, come and go, 0:50:12.880 --> 0:50:14.319 and it's like, no, it's not come and go, it's 0:50:14.320 --> 0:50:16.760 see to dinner at seven thirty. Like I said, Yo, 0:50:17.400 --> 0:50:20.440 Like I'm really jellou swear, how do you really feel? 0:50:20.760 --> 0:50:23.440 That's the only time that I'm like actually uptight because 0:50:23.440 --> 0:50:25.160 it's disrespectful of everyone else's time. 0:50:25.640 --> 0:50:26.879 Like that's what makes me mad. 0:50:32.040 --> 0:50:35.200 Okay, you know what time it is. Today's a good day. 0:50:35.440 --> 0:50:49.320 To have a good day. I'll see you next week.