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Speaker 1: I pointed out how much I do for our household,

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Speaker 1: and my wife is still ungrateful.

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Speaker 2: Go on strike.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I can't believe I actually have a reason to

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Speaker 1: post something on Reddit. But here I am my wife

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Speaker 1: forty one female and I forty two male, have been

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Speaker 1: married for fifteen years.

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Speaker 2: Wow.

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Speaker 1: I apparently surprised her by being capable of doing household

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Speaker 1: chores and tasks.

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Speaker 2: Which I didn't think much of.

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Speaker 1: My mom always asked me to help out with chores

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Speaker 1: when I was a kid, so I didn't think it

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Speaker 1: was beneath me.

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Speaker 2: R And this guy gets it. He gets it, by

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Speaker 2: the way.

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Speaker 1: This comes from throwaway Sad Husband's eight slash okay story

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Speaker 1: t I'm superading. I do think I inherited her need

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Speaker 1: to clean excessively, Like it's so bad that I can't

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Speaker 1: eat until a mess is dealt with.

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Speaker 2: That is my mom, Like she will not sit down

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Speaker 2: for dinner until she's cleaned up every Oh my gosh,

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Speaker 2: oh my gosh.

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Speaker 1: My mom is an amazing cook. My aunt was a

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Speaker 1: literal chef at a fancy hotel, and my dad loved

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Speaker 1: having barbecues. It was pretty natural to learn from them

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Speaker 1: and pick up a thing or two The only thing

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Speaker 1: I didn't pick up was how to make a decent

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Speaker 1: cup of tea or coffee, and I'm genuinely awful at it.

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Speaker 1: It got to a point where I was handling most

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Speaker 1: of the household chores and taking care of cooking, which

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Speaker 1: I prefer anyways, since she comes home exhausted, I've been

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Speaker 1: asking our children eleven female and nine male, to do

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Speaker 1: some minor tasks around the house and hopefully teach.

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Speaker 2: Them this sort of thing too.

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Speaker 1: She has a group of friends who hang out regularly.

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Speaker 1: This time it was her turn to host the group

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Speaker 1: at her home. I offered to take our children out

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Speaker 1: for the day and it was all set Before we left.

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Speaker 2: I had to finish up some things for work. The

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Speaker 2: office space is practically.

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Speaker 1: On top of our living room, so I could hear

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Speaker 1: what they were talking about the entire time.

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Speaker 2: One of the.

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Speaker 1: Friends asked how she always kept her house so spotless,

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Speaker 1: and my wife just bragged about how she was responsible

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Speaker 1: for it all.

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Speaker 2: Girl, girl, no, no no, no, no, no no no,

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Speaker 2: don't try to take Ohk's credit. Come on now. Then

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Speaker 2: they all started talking about their gripes with their marriages.

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Speaker 2: A common theme was how unhelpful there's spouse frustrating when

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Speaker 2: he's like, literally very helpful. Yeah, he's doing so much.

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Speaker 1: I felt pretty uncomfortab, so I just left the office

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Speaker 1: and went out with the kids. I came back after

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Speaker 1: they had left for the night and acted as normal

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Speaker 1: until we got to our bedroom. I asked her what

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Speaker 1: was up with that conversation they had, and pointed out

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Speaker 1: that I did the cooking and cleaning in our marriage.

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Speaker 1: She told me not to take it personally, and that

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Speaker 1: she just wanted to fit in with the struggles of

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Speaker 1: her friend top. Now I just feel unappreciated, especially since

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Speaker 1: I don't clearly remember any genuine gratitude for what I

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Speaker 1: do from her. Since then, she's been pretty short with me,

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Speaker 1: she says, I'm weaponizing what I'm doing against her and.

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Speaker 2: Holding it over her head.

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Speaker 1: I don't expect her to compliment me each time I

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Speaker 1: clean or defend me religiously just a little.

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Speaker 2: My husband is pretty helpful, Actually he does his share.

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Speaker 2: That would be nice.

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Speaker 1: I can't help but feel like her friends think I'm

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Speaker 1: some sort of deadbeat who comes home to relax and

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Speaker 1: neglect her. All right, Update number one, I'm pretty shocked

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Speaker 1: this post went as viral as it did, and I

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Speaker 1: tried my best to speak to my wife yesterday. I

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Speaker 1: just can't believe that this is the woman I married.

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Speaker 1: I tried speaking with her, telling her that what she

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Speaker 1: did wasn't that big of a deal, but was still

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Speaker 1: not a nice.

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Speaker 2: Thing to do.

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Speaker 1: She didn't like me bringing it up again and just

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Speaker 1: told me to suck it up and stop being about

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Speaker 1: one mistake. She apologized, but in a tone that just

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Speaker 1: sounded like she was just tired of dealing.

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Speaker 2: Okay, Vine, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. Yeah.

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Speaker 1: I noticed her getting very heated and on the verge

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Speaker 1: of starting an argument, so I backed off and switched

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Speaker 1: to a different topic. I asked if we could adjust

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Speaker 1: our duties at home to be more fair for both

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Speaker 1: of us since most of our management fell to me.

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Speaker 1: I mean pretty much ninety percent of things like cooking, cleaning,

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Speaker 1: including planning for our date nights, or vacations for our

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Speaker 1: family all rely on me. I do think it's an

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Speaker 1: issue that she gets to come home and just tell

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Speaker 1: me that she's tired. Then she got up in my face,

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Speaker 1: telling me I had no right to lecture her about

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Speaker 1: chore duties when I'm practically at home most of the time,

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Speaker 1: she completely refused to hear me out and basically told

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Speaker 1: me that what we have works best for our situation.

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Speaker 1: She threw it in my face that she was the

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Speaker 1: moneymaker and that balanced everything out in the end. Even

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Speaker 1: this morning, she was pretty annoyed with me, coming downstairs

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Speaker 1: in a bad mood. I'm very sure our kids noticed

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Speaker 1: it too, but I drove them to school after they

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Speaker 1: got ready. When I got back, I noticed that my

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Speaker 1: wife left her packed.

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Speaker 2: Lunch on our kitchen counter.

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Speaker 1: So now I'm sitting here just feeling like the woman

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Speaker 1: I've known for fifteen years hates me.

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Speaker 2: Wow, so messed up, just asking for some appreciation. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: and his wife is like, no.

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Speaker 1: Right, I guess I'll have to push this issue properly,

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Speaker 1: even if she gets angry. She's been ignoring my text

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Speaker 1: and attempts to call her. I can't just let her

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Speaker 1: act like this, especially in front of our children.

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Speaker 2: She's acting like a child. She won't she won't talk

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Speaker 2: to you about it.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, and this is not going to set a good

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Speaker 1: example for what the children should be like.

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Speaker 2: Now we have update number two. Are we ready for Ready?

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Speaker 2: I'm diving ready.

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Speaker 1: I think I'm just done at this point, I did

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Speaker 1: something I never did before and went into her phone

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Speaker 1: while she slept.

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Speaker 2: Oh no, we.

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Speaker 1: Know we both know each other's passwords, so it really

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Speaker 1: wasn't difficult. Some of the cheating comments got to me,

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Speaker 1: and I felt pretty paranoid about the situation.

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Speaker 2: So I'm assuming people commented.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, but that's always what ready goes to though it's

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Speaker 1: always cheap.

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Speaker 2: It's a classic creddit that. Don't listen to them. Don't listen,

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Speaker 2: don't don't violate privacy before talking to your partner.

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Speaker 1: Right, Instead, I found a group chat with some of

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Speaker 1: her work friends, different from the other friends she had

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Speaker 1: over It was just non stop mockery of me and

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Speaker 1: some of the stuff I did for her.

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Speaker 2: And so understand this, like desire to mock your partner, yeah,

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Speaker 2: or to belittle them in front of other people? Like what,

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Speaker 2: why would you want your friends and coworkers to think

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Speaker 2: badly or poorly of your partner? Right? I don't know.

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Speaker 2: Maybe I just need a lot of validation from other

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Speaker 2: people I would want to talk to about. I mean,

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Speaker 2: I don't like I could see blowing off steam or something.

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Speaker 2: There's a really close friend. I think there's a difference

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Speaker 2: between saying like, Hey, I'm frustrated with this and I

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Speaker 2: don't know how to talk to them about it, right,

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Speaker 2: and asking for advice, right, But to be like, oh, yeah,

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Speaker 2: my'd buben is just so stupid and he's not doing

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Speaker 2: anything around the house, yeah, which is just a lie.

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Speaker 1: She told them how embarrassed she feels to be with me,

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Speaker 1: and then I dote on.

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Speaker 2: Her like a parent and don't feel like her husband.

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Speaker 2: Oh who, that might be a serious issue. I think

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Speaker 2: that's like divorce really, maybe counseling because they have kids.

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Speaker 2: But like, right to say that is just such a betrayal.

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Speaker 1: Part of me really wants to play devil's advocate because like, okay,

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Speaker 1: read as stories, we.

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Speaker 2: Don't know everything. We don't know everything that's true. You

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Speaker 2: don't know everything that's going on.

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Speaker 1: So I do kind of wonder what her side is, Yeah,

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Speaker 1: what her side looks like, because if if she feels

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Speaker 1: like he's acting like a parent, doesn't feel like her husband,

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Speaker 1: that is an issue, and that it's something that.

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Speaker 2: They actually need to brought up to her husband exactly,

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Speaker 2: her coworkers exactly.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, she should deal with it in a different way,

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Speaker 1: if that is accurate. If that's true, the lunches I

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Speaker 1: pack for her are humiliating because I add sweets and

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Speaker 1: other treats.

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Speaker 2: I know she likes. That's so sad. What he's just

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Speaker 2: being all sweets. Don't be embarrassed by like a lunch

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Speaker 2: that you have. Come on, it's food. Yeah, Like if

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Speaker 2: you're worried to give me a capri son for lunch today,

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Speaker 2: I'd be like, I would think that's amazing. I'd be

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Speaker 2: like this is great. Yeah, and like, I don't know,

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Speaker 2: someone gave me a little fruit roll up. I'd be

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Speaker 2: like sick freaking winning over here, win gushers. A person

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Speaker 2: allows me.

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Speaker 1: Some of her coworkers tease her about the snacks I

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Speaker 1: have in for her, and she admitted to just throwing

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Speaker 1: them out at work.

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Speaker 2: No, the co workers are bad. Your coworkers suck, and

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Speaker 2: you suck. She's being around bad people. I hate them.

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Speaker 1: She doesn't have any issue eating them at home, but

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Speaker 1: at work she throws out my baking.

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Speaker 2: You're baking baking.

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Speaker 1: This is sad because, Okay, I don't know if I'm

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Speaker 1: just playing Devil's advocate too much. I feel like she's

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Speaker 1: definitely not going about the situation right. Yeah, definitely shouldn't

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Speaker 1: be spreading lies and stuff. I think she's just so

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Speaker 1: focused on other people's opinions of her. Yes, yes, And

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Speaker 1: I think this is a bad group of coworkers to

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Speaker 1: be around.

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Speaker 2: And her friends are bad.

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Speaker 1: Yes, and I think she's just got bad people around her.

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Speaker 1: That's not the entire source of the situation, but I

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Speaker 1: do think it affects it well.

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Speaker 2: I think it is an explanation, but it's not an excuse,

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Speaker 2: right right.

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Speaker 1: She had some choice words to say about me in

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Speaker 1: her chat, some of which I don't have the courage

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Speaker 1: to type out here. One of her meme pictures was

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Speaker 1: of me on my knees scrubbing a bathroom tile, edited

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Speaker 1: to have some sort of dress on, like I was

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Speaker 1: some sort of housewife from the nineteen sixties or something.

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Speaker 2: Dude, that is insane. Check your internalized misogyny, girl, Yeah,

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Speaker 2: that's insane. I no longer want to play Devil's out of.

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Speaker 3: That.

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Speaker 2: She saw it. That's really that's weird. We imagine again,

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Speaker 2: belittling your husband, mocking him for helping clean the house. Right,

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Speaker 2: You're literally like you were complaining about him not doing anything,

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Speaker 2: and now you're showing him doing something and then making

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Speaker 2: it out to be like, Oh, he's just he's a woman, right,

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Speaker 2: It's like, why are you complaining about the roles the

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Speaker 2: like that? You don't even make these generals being reversed

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Speaker 2: if to them.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, Like, it's just so backwards in so many ways.

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Speaker 1: I just closed her phone and left the bedroom. I

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Speaker 1: confronted her about the chat in the morning and the

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Speaker 1: contents of it, which got her panic. I focused on

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Speaker 1: our kids this morning and left her to her own devices.

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Speaker 1: It's not like she would have appreciated a kid's lunch anyways.

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Speaker 1: But we will always appreciate you joining us live and

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Speaker 1: YouTube every weekday at three PMPs. Do you just top

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Speaker 1: her profile? I'll never throw you away, never, never. There's

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Speaker 1: a little bit more.

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Speaker 2: Do we have any final thoughts? Well? I think first

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Speaker 2: she need to have a hard conversation with her say

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Speaker 2: like that was completely inappropriate. I know I shouldn't have

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Speaker 2: looked at your phone. That's up to that. Yes, I

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Speaker 2: know I shouldn't have done that, but that you should

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Speaker 2: not be talking about me like that in front of

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Speaker 2: your coworkers. Yeah, and I think either we need to

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Speaker 2: go to some strong counseling or this relationship is over.

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Speaker 3: Yep.

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Speaker 2: Sounds about right.

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Speaker 1: So now she's texting me like crazy at the office.

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Speaker 1: But I think I lost all respect for her and

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Speaker 1: what she's become. Not only does she find me overbearing

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Speaker 1: and embarrassing as a husband, but then I find out

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Speaker 1: she mocks me to her friends and exposes some sensitive

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Speaker 1: relationship issues to.

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Speaker 2: Her group chat.

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Speaker 1: This will probably be the last update, since I don't

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Speaker 1: think she can come back from this. We just celebrated

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Speaker 1: our fifteenth anniversary last this month.

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Speaker 2: Two all so sad.

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Speaker 1: I feel like such a loser now after seeing what

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Speaker 1: my wife actually thinks of me.

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Speaker 2: And that's the end of the story. What a sad

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Speaker 2: note to leave all sad? Okay, well again, I have

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Speaker 2: the same advice. Yeah right now, it's either you have

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Speaker 2: that conversation you might have to end this relationship.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, this seems like your only options mm hm CAD's

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Speaker 1: counseling or an ending.

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Speaker 2: But that's also the end of this story, so we'll

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Speaker 2: see you next time. My husband is furious that I

258
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Speaker 2: don't wear lingerie enough. Now he's accusing me of cheating.

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Speaker 2: What a husband and I got into an argument last

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Speaker 2: night because we haven't been intimate in almost a month.

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Speaker 2: This is because a couple of months ago he was

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Speaker 2: in a self admitted manic state and took out multiple

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Speaker 2: loans to gamble and lost all the money. We're talking

264
00:10:47,280 --> 00:10:50,800
Speaker 2: upwards of sixty five thousand loans from multiple banks. He

265
00:10:50,840 --> 00:10:53,000
Speaker 2: also lost his job a month ago. By the way,

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Speaker 2: this comes from Throwaway twenty twenty six, nineteen sixty two

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Speaker 2: on the Okay storytime Separate. So we're in a terrible

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Speaker 2: financial situation. So I've been working at my job harder

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Speaker 2: than ever to make more money and help him pay

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Speaker 2: off his debt. I work extra days and stay at

271
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Speaker 2: work for up to twelve hours a day. I even

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00:11:09,600 --> 00:11:13,080
Speaker 2: volunteer to work at other locations for extra opportunities to

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Speaker 2: make money. Some of these are over an hour away.

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Speaker 2: Last night, I came home from work after working ten hours,

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Speaker 2: and I was physically exhausted and emotionally spent because we

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Speaker 2: almost had an active shooter situation at my workplace and

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00:11:25,320 --> 00:11:27,920
Speaker 2: it stressed me out. That's scary. He tried to initiate

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Speaker 2: spicy sleep, and I was not in the mood because

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Speaker 2: I have been home for less than ten minutes. H dude,

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Speaker 2: give her a second, Give her a second. She just

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Speaker 2: had a light yeah, opportunity, and he currently doesn't have

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Speaker 2: a job, so he was able to relax all day

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Speaker 2: waiting for me. Was she not like worried about her?

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Speaker 2: I'm sorry, he doesn't have a job and you're working

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Speaker 2: way more to pay off his debts.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, that's crazy because he has lots of debts. That

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00:11:52,160 --> 00:11:53,000
Speaker 1: was a lot of money.

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Speaker 2: He stood up and took my lingerie from one of

289
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Speaker 2: my clothing racks and threw them at my head, screaming,

290
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Speaker 2: who are you wearing this for? Because it's it's not me.

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Speaker 2: He's throwing stuff at you. He's throwing things and it's lingerie.

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Speaker 2: I couldn't even fathom entertaining that thought, so I tried

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00:12:07,600 --> 00:12:10,280
Speaker 2: to cool it down, but he kept going. Eventually, I

294
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Speaker 2: just left the house and took a drive for two hours.

295
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Speaker 2: By the time I came home, he had fallen asleep.

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Speaker 2: This morning, I went to work and noticed on our

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Speaker 2: cameras that he had gone to sleep in the basement

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Speaker 2: in the middle of the night and never came up.

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Speaker 2: By three pm. I was extremely worried that something was wrong,

300
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Speaker 2: and he suffers from on a living ideation, so I

301
00:12:28,600 --> 00:12:30,600
Speaker 2: told my boss that I was leaving work early to

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Speaker 2: check on him. When I came home, he was sleeping

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Speaker 2: in the basement, so I woke him up and he

304
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Speaker 2: asked me to bring him ibuprofen for a headache and

305
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Speaker 2: to go pick up breakfast for him. So I drove

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Speaker 2: out to get him a Red Bull breakfast sandwich and

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Speaker 2: a milkshake, came home and gave it to him. That's

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Speaker 2: when he reinitiated the fight from last night and demanded

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Speaker 2: to know where the lingerie was. Oh my gosh, the

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Speaker 2: night before, when I got home from my drive, I

311
00:12:53,240 --> 00:12:55,640
Speaker 2: was afraid that he was going to destroy the lingerie,

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00:12:55,720 --> 00:12:57,600
Speaker 2: which I had spent my own money on, so I

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Speaker 2: hid it in a safe place. I wouldn't tell him

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Speaker 2: where the lingerree was, and he started screaming at me again.

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Speaker 2: I decided to leave the house again, this is unacceptable behavior.

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Speaker 2: Not five minutes later, this was the text that I received.

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Speaker 2: I don't even know what to say. I'm heartbroken and

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Speaker 2: all I want to do is cry in the parking

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Speaker 2: lot that I'm currently sitting in. I feel completely unappreciated

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Speaker 2: for working extra shifts to help and pay off his debts,

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Speaker 2: taking care of him, even after he accuses me of

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Speaker 2: cheating on him. And checking on him when I think

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Speaker 2: something is wrong. Honestly, that one message left me completely speechless.

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Speaker 2: I don't recognize this person. I have no idea who

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Speaker 2: he is. I feel degraded and humiliated with the way

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Speaker 2: that he spoke to me. How do I respond to

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Speaker 2: his accusations? And what am I supposed to do about

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Speaker 2: the way he spoke to me in those text messages.

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Speaker 2: I know he's going through a lot, but the way

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Speaker 2: he's been talking to me has put my self esteem

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Speaker 2: straight through the ground. How do I navigate this and

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Speaker 2: how do I try to move on from what happened

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00:13:50,920 --> 00:13:54,080
Speaker 2: over the past twenty four hours? Edit? Some commenters are

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00:13:54,160 --> 00:13:56,760
Speaker 2: under the impression that I had hidden the lingerie when

335
00:13:56,760 --> 00:13:59,520
Speaker 2: I bought them, and that he'd found them and confronted me.

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00:13:59,800 --> 00:14:03,240
Speaker 2: A large walking closet and a rack dedicated to my lingerie.

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00:14:03,600 --> 00:14:06,080
Speaker 2: They're in plain view and he has access to them

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Speaker 2: all the time for when he wants me to wear them.

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00:14:08,280 --> 00:14:10,160
Speaker 2: He knows about all of them because he helps me

340
00:14:10,240 --> 00:14:12,720
Speaker 2: pick them out. The particular pair he was mad about

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00:14:12,760 --> 00:14:15,800
Speaker 2: was a purple Valentine's Day set from VS, which I

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00:14:15,920 --> 00:14:18,440
Speaker 2: bought via their online vssay. I didn't wear them on

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Speaker 2: Valentine's Day. I got my period five days early, so

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Speaker 2: I put them with the rest of my stuff and

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00:14:22,760 --> 00:14:25,480
Speaker 2: never ended up wearing them at all. Since Valentine's Day

346
00:14:25,560 --> 00:14:27,480
Speaker 2: was a month ago, I presented him with a post

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Speaker 2: nuptial agreement that states if we divorce, any debt will

348
00:14:30,920 --> 00:14:34,240
Speaker 2: remain the responsibility of the person who took them out. Thankfully,

349
00:14:34,360 --> 00:14:37,160
Speaker 2: we have no joint loans of any kind together. I

350
00:14:37,160 --> 00:14:39,880
Speaker 2: have my credit report run just to make sure no

351
00:14:40,000 --> 00:14:43,240
Speaker 2: sneaky loans or credit cards behind my back in my name.

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00:14:43,400 --> 00:14:46,600
Speaker 2: Aside from my eighteen k left in student loans, Collectively,

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00:14:46,640 --> 00:14:49,760
Speaker 2: my credit cards are under eight percent utilization and that's

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Speaker 2: all I've got. I would take ownership of our cats too.

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Speaker 2: He would continue to pay off his fifty five K loans,

356
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Speaker 2: his forty K student loans, and his twenty two k in.

357
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Speaker 3: Credit card debt.

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Speaker 2: He was stunned when I gave him the post nup. Ultimately,

359
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Speaker 2: he did agree that we looked very hurt re signing

360
00:15:04,640 --> 00:15:07,800
Speaker 2: the papers on Tuesday. Yeah, I think that's very fair.

361
00:15:07,920 --> 00:15:09,800
Speaker 2: Just get him get it out of very fair. I've

362
00:15:09,800 --> 00:15:12,920
Speaker 2: also scheduled marriage counseling appointments once a week. He said,

363
00:15:12,920 --> 00:15:14,880
Speaker 2: he was devastated that it got to this point, but

364
00:15:14,920 --> 00:15:17,200
Speaker 2: he agreed to doing this as well. This marriage counselor

365
00:15:17,240 --> 00:15:20,800
Speaker 2: also specializes in addiction, and I suggested he scheduled private

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00:15:20,800 --> 00:15:23,440
Speaker 2: appointments with her to work on that. We'll see how

367
00:15:23,440 --> 00:15:25,880
Speaker 2: it goes. And there is another updates. But I think

368
00:15:25,880 --> 00:15:28,040
Speaker 2: this is headed in the right direction. I think so

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Speaker 2: the direction that it needs to go.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, and does he have an addiction or something? It

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00:15:32,520 --> 00:15:34,280
Speaker 1: kind of seems like he does. I don't think we

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00:15:34,360 --> 00:15:37,360
Speaker 1: heard of what it is from that last sentence. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: it seems like that might also be an issue.

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00:15:39,280 --> 00:15:42,200
Speaker 2: Yeah, another issue, Yeah, hard, which also might have led

375
00:15:42,240 --> 00:15:44,720
Speaker 2: into some kind of that reaction that he had. Yeah,

376
00:15:44,760 --> 00:15:47,360
Speaker 2: could be you know something. There's another update. Let's get

377
00:15:47,360 --> 00:15:49,320
Speaker 2: into it. Hi, this is a follow up that I

378
00:15:49,360 --> 00:15:51,920
Speaker 2: feel like is long overdue in this group. I feel

379
00:15:51,920 --> 00:15:53,760
Speaker 2: like I owe it to everyone that gave me advice

380
00:15:53,800 --> 00:15:56,400
Speaker 2: in my original post. It's been a long and hard

381
00:15:56,520 --> 00:15:59,120
Speaker 2: road ever since, but hopefully this reaches the people that

382
00:15:59,160 --> 00:16:01,720
Speaker 2: reached out to me and gave me some hard advice

383
00:16:01,760 --> 00:16:03,960
Speaker 2: that I really needed to hear. In the months following

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Speaker 2: my last post, I have since left my husband and

385
00:16:06,640 --> 00:16:09,960
Speaker 2: filed for divorce. Nice, there we go. After a few

386
00:16:09,960 --> 00:16:13,160
Speaker 2: other incidents, with one involving a firearm, I started applying

387
00:16:13,160 --> 00:16:15,680
Speaker 2: for jobs around the country, and by some miracle that

388
00:16:15,720 --> 00:16:19,640
Speaker 2: I cannot comprehend, I landed an incredibly well paying job

389
00:16:19,800 --> 00:16:23,080
Speaker 2: that is almost four times my previous salary. I don't

390
00:16:23,080 --> 00:16:25,080
Speaker 2: know how I managed to do it, aside from just

391
00:16:25,120 --> 00:16:28,080
Speaker 2: funneling all my energy into one singular task that it

392
00:16:28,080 --> 00:16:30,640
Speaker 2: would allow me to leave. Once I got the job,

393
00:16:30,720 --> 00:16:32,560
Speaker 2: I let my ex husband know that I was going

394
00:16:32,560 --> 00:16:35,080
Speaker 2: to be leaving without him. It was really nerve racking

395
00:16:35,160 --> 00:16:37,840
Speaker 2: telling him that I was leaving without him five days

396
00:16:37,840 --> 00:16:40,640
Speaker 2: before I moved. But I had a really, really good

397
00:16:40,640 --> 00:16:43,760
Speaker 2: support system and a friend group along with family members

398
00:16:43,840 --> 00:16:46,400
Speaker 2: that made sure I was safe during this transition. Even

399
00:16:46,440 --> 00:16:48,760
Speaker 2: though I told him I was going to file for divorce,

400
00:16:48,880 --> 00:16:50,760
Speaker 2: for the first month of me being gone, he did

401
00:16:50,880 --> 00:16:53,800
Speaker 2: everything in his power to convince me to stay, including

402
00:16:53,880 --> 00:16:56,680
Speaker 2: threatening me on numerous occasions and telling me that if

403
00:16:56,680 --> 00:16:58,560
Speaker 2: I chose to go through with a divorce, he would

404
00:16:58,600 --> 00:17:01,040
Speaker 2: make it so financially just instructive to me that I

405
00:17:01,120 --> 00:17:03,560
Speaker 2: might choose to stay with him. After all, you suckdeed.

406
00:17:03,680 --> 00:17:04,600
Speaker 2: That's I'm sorry.

407
00:17:04,720 --> 00:17:08,639
Speaker 1: Trying to convince me to say yeah, threatening me, but

408
00:17:08,960 --> 00:17:12,480
Speaker 1: not not the best, not at all the best tactics. Ultimately,

409
00:17:12,520 --> 00:17:14,480
Speaker 1: it turns out that the law was very much on

410
00:17:14,520 --> 00:17:16,840
Speaker 1: my side, and while I did pay for all the

411
00:17:16,880 --> 00:17:20,720
Speaker 1: divorce fees because he's unemployed, I don't know him absolutely anything,

412
00:17:20,880 --> 00:17:23,120
Speaker 1: and the divorce itself was actually quite cut and dry.

413
00:17:23,200 --> 00:17:26,000
Speaker 1: I have an incredible job, I live in a highly

414
00:17:26,040 --> 00:17:29,280
Speaker 1: secure area. I moved far away and made new friends

415
00:17:29,400 --> 00:17:31,760
Speaker 1: and have been so incredibly lucky to have an awesome

416
00:17:31,760 --> 00:17:34,119
Speaker 1: work environment as well. I have my own townhouse. And

417
00:17:34,160 --> 00:17:36,240
Speaker 1: I also took all our pets with me, as I

418
00:17:36,280 --> 00:17:38,000
Speaker 1: didn't believe that he's capable.

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Speaker 2: Of taking care of them. Yeah, he can't even take

420
00:17:39,680 --> 00:17:41,919
Speaker 2: care of himself, right. It is in the divorce agreement

421
00:17:41,960 --> 00:17:43,760
Speaker 2: that I will be keeping them for the rest of

422
00:17:43,800 --> 00:17:46,359
Speaker 2: our lives. Thanks goodness you put that in there. I

423
00:17:46,400 --> 00:17:48,919
Speaker 2: donated just about everything I owned and came to a

424
00:17:48,920 --> 00:17:51,680
Speaker 2: new place with only my pets and clothes in a

425
00:17:51,720 --> 00:17:55,280
Speaker 2: suitcase and started completely over. I can't tell anyone reading

426
00:17:55,280 --> 00:17:57,840
Speaker 2: this just how liberating and peaceful this journey has been.

427
00:17:57,880 --> 00:17:59,800
Speaker 2: I love that. I'm very happy for you. Our house

428
00:17:59,800 --> 00:18:01,879
Speaker 2: has since been sold and he has moved across the

429
00:18:01,920 --> 00:18:03,919
Speaker 2: country to live with his mom and dad as he

430
00:18:03,960 --> 00:18:07,320
Speaker 2: figures out his unemployment situation. He still sends me threats

431
00:18:07,359 --> 00:18:10,239
Speaker 2: followed by love bombing, although by this point they are

432
00:18:10,240 --> 00:18:12,760
Speaker 2: happening less and less and less each week. I cut

433
00:18:12,760 --> 00:18:15,600
Speaker 2: off any personal communication with him about a month ago,

434
00:18:15,720 --> 00:18:18,120
Speaker 2: and now I only speak to him through our lawyers,

435
00:18:18,160 --> 00:18:20,880
Speaker 2: which is pretty easy. I'm not gonna lie. Even though

436
00:18:20,880 --> 00:18:23,560
Speaker 2: that was the hardest thing I've ever done logistically, emotionally,

437
00:18:23,640 --> 00:18:27,800
Speaker 2: leaving was the best and easiest experience I've ever had. Great.

438
00:18:28,240 --> 00:18:30,439
Speaker 2: I think at the time I made my last post,

439
00:18:30,640 --> 00:18:33,439
Speaker 2: I was in incredible denial and not thinking that I

440
00:18:33,480 --> 00:18:35,919
Speaker 2: was good enough as a wife, and not doing everything

441
00:18:35,960 --> 00:18:37,879
Speaker 2: I could and my power to try to fix it.

442
00:18:38,040 --> 00:18:39,800
Speaker 2: I have since come to realize that I did, in

443
00:18:39,800 --> 00:18:43,240
Speaker 2: fact do absolutely everything that I could control in order

444
00:18:43,280 --> 00:18:45,320
Speaker 2: to try to save our marriage. I made us go

445
00:18:45,400 --> 00:18:48,720
Speaker 2: to marriage counseling. I gave him mental health resources. I

446
00:18:48,800 --> 00:18:50,960
Speaker 2: reached out to his parents, and they agreed to send

447
00:18:51,040 --> 00:18:53,879
Speaker 2: him to a rehab he ultimately refused. I applied for

448
00:18:54,040 --> 00:18:56,520
Speaker 2: endless jobs for him. I would stay late at work

449
00:18:56,600 --> 00:18:58,520
Speaker 2: just to make enough money for us. I would come

450
00:18:58,560 --> 00:19:00,160
Speaker 2: home in the middle of the night, and still I'll

451
00:19:00,160 --> 00:19:02,760
Speaker 2: make him dinner. I still kept the house as tidy

452
00:19:02,800 --> 00:19:04,640
Speaker 2: as I could with the little amount of free time

453
00:19:04,680 --> 00:19:07,359
Speaker 2: that I had. I was there for him emotionally when

454
00:19:07,400 --> 00:19:09,639
Speaker 2: he would have breakdowns. I would ask his friends to

455
00:19:09,680 --> 00:19:11,760
Speaker 2: please check in on him when he was feeling low.

456
00:19:12,000 --> 00:19:14,440
Speaker 2: I made doctor's appointments for him that he ultimately didn't

457
00:19:14,440 --> 00:19:17,480
Speaker 2: show up to. I saw out financial advisors to help

458
00:19:17,560 --> 00:19:19,520
Speaker 2: us figure out how to pay off his debts. I

459
00:19:19,560 --> 00:19:21,439
Speaker 2: put him in contact with a head on her I

460
00:19:21,520 --> 00:19:24,560
Speaker 2: gave him every single time he had an outburst and

461
00:19:24,560 --> 00:19:27,639
Speaker 2: degraded me. I spent months doing research on addiction just

462
00:19:27,680 --> 00:19:29,920
Speaker 2: so I could understand him better. I read books on

463
00:19:30,000 --> 00:19:32,760
Speaker 2: how to improve relationships that are trauma bonded. I did

464
00:19:32,760 --> 00:19:36,280
Speaker 2: everything I possibly could. It sounds like you did everything. Yeah,

465
00:19:36,320 --> 00:19:38,359
Speaker 2: you're doing great. At the end of the day, no

466
00:19:38,440 --> 00:19:40,480
Speaker 2: matter how much I loved him or wanted to make

467
00:19:40,480 --> 00:19:43,159
Speaker 2: the marriage work, because I believed it was my responsibility

468
00:19:43,200 --> 00:19:46,159
Speaker 2: to fix everything, I had to step outside of myself

469
00:19:46,280 --> 00:19:49,000
Speaker 2: and realize that if this was happening to anyone else

470
00:19:49,040 --> 00:19:51,000
Speaker 2: that I loved, I would not tolerate it. I had

471
00:19:51,000 --> 00:19:53,199
Speaker 2: to decide to love myself just as much as I

472
00:19:53,240 --> 00:19:55,199
Speaker 2: love the other people around me, and that is the

473
00:19:55,240 --> 00:19:57,200
Speaker 2: only thing that led me to leave. That is such

474
00:19:57,240 --> 00:19:59,560
Speaker 2: a great point. Yeah, wow, have you ever noticed, you know,

475
00:19:59,560 --> 00:20:02,439
Speaker 2: if you're a being mistreated, just think like, would I

476
00:20:02,480 --> 00:20:04,520
Speaker 2: be upset if my friend was being treated this way

477
00:20:04,800 --> 00:20:07,040
Speaker 2: or my loved one? You know. Sure, it's a great,

478
00:20:07,119 --> 00:20:09,679
Speaker 2: great rule to live by. I'm safe, I'm probably the

479
00:20:09,720 --> 00:20:13,760
Speaker 2: happiest I've been in my entire life. I'm independent, I'm confident,

480
00:20:14,240 --> 00:20:16,920
Speaker 2: I'm learning who I am again. I'm proud my divorce

481
00:20:16,960 --> 00:20:18,879
Speaker 2: will be final in just a few short weeks, and

482
00:20:18,920 --> 00:20:21,520
Speaker 2: I'm excited to truly be my own person again. Anyway,

483
00:20:21,640 --> 00:20:24,160
Speaker 2: I hope that this update is sufficient, and I appreciate

484
00:20:24,200 --> 00:20:26,960
Speaker 2: everyone that reached out to me all those months ago.

485
00:20:27,119 --> 00:20:29,360
Speaker 2: And that is the end of that story. I love

486
00:20:29,400 --> 00:20:31,159
Speaker 2: that ending. I love that. Oh he's like, you know what,

487
00:20:31,200 --> 00:20:33,080
Speaker 2: I really found myself and I don't need him, And

488
00:20:33,200 --> 00:20:35,919
Speaker 2: that's like beautiful. Yeah, it sounds like putting in so

489
00:20:36,000 --> 00:20:39,359
Speaker 2: much work. Yeah, and you don't need him, You don't

490
00:20:39,400 --> 00:20:43,000
Speaker 2: need him need you. Yeah, he did pay his debt, Yeah,

491
00:20:43,040 --> 00:20:46,320
Speaker 2: one hundred and seventeen K debt. So much, so much,

492
00:20:46,440 --> 00:20:48,760
Speaker 2: so much, which debt. Maybe it was a gambling addiction.

493
00:20:49,040 --> 00:20:51,959
Speaker 2: That's also possible, but that is the end of that story,

494
00:20:52,359 --> 00:20:54,160
Speaker 2: so we'll see you next time.

495
00:20:54,440 --> 00:20:56,640
Speaker 1: I told my partner he needs to find a better

496
00:20:56,720 --> 00:20:57,640
Speaker 1: job for our family.

497
00:20:57,880 --> 00:21:01,080
Speaker 2: He still hasn't and it's been five got to find

498
00:21:01,080 --> 00:21:01,800
Speaker 2: a better husband.

499
00:21:02,000 --> 00:21:04,440
Speaker 1: My partner and I started dating in college and got

500
00:21:04,440 --> 00:21:07,520
Speaker 1: married after he graduated years later. I've always been the

501
00:21:07,560 --> 00:21:10,440
Speaker 1: driven one in the relationship and pushed him to take

502
00:21:10,480 --> 00:21:12,960
Speaker 1: school seriously and graduate. I came from a lower middle

503
00:21:12,960 --> 00:21:15,560
Speaker 1: class family and had a job since I was legally

504
00:21:15,600 --> 00:21:18,080
Speaker 1: able to work. I have always paid my cell phone,

505
00:21:18,160 --> 00:21:20,640
Speaker 1: bought my car, paid for my college by working full

506
00:21:20,640 --> 00:21:23,760
Speaker 1: time through school and taking classes when I could, or

507
00:21:23,840 --> 00:21:26,119
Speaker 1: taking out student loans to help. I can't remember a

508
00:21:26,160 --> 00:21:28,359
Speaker 1: time when I ever asked my parents for money, because

509
00:21:28,359 --> 00:21:29,480
Speaker 1: I knew they didn't have it.

510
00:21:29,560 --> 00:21:31,400
Speaker 2: My parents fought about money a lot.

511
00:21:31,520 --> 00:21:33,679
Speaker 1: By the way, this comes from Grow with Me twenty

512
00:21:33,680 --> 00:21:35,400
Speaker 1: two on the r slash.

513
00:21:35,080 --> 00:21:36,440
Speaker 2: Okay story Time Sepreddit.

514
00:21:36,600 --> 00:21:38,600
Speaker 1: Even in grade school, if I wanted to go to

515
00:21:38,680 --> 00:21:41,159
Speaker 1: the movies or shopping for school clothes, I worked and

516
00:21:41,240 --> 00:21:43,440
Speaker 1: paid for those. My partner grew up in a big

517
00:21:43,440 --> 00:21:46,679
Speaker 1: house and never really had to want for things, especially

518
00:21:46,720 --> 00:21:49,560
Speaker 1: after his dad remarried. He married into a family with

519
00:21:49,640 --> 00:21:52,399
Speaker 1: a lot of money, like one percent kind of money.

520
00:21:52,480 --> 00:21:56,080
Speaker 1: My partner went on insane trips, had a credit card

521
00:21:56,119 --> 00:21:59,600
Speaker 1: through school and everything paid for until he failed school

522
00:21:59,760 --> 00:22:00,840
Speaker 1: and his dad.

523
00:22:00,680 --> 00:22:01,640
Speaker 2: Kind of cut him off.

524
00:22:03,560 --> 00:22:05,720
Speaker 1: Yeah that's crazy having a credit card that someone else

525
00:22:05,760 --> 00:22:08,760
Speaker 1: pays for. Yeah, that's whoa. That's when I had to

526
00:22:08,800 --> 00:22:11,159
Speaker 1: step in and push him to finish. He would have

527
00:22:11,240 --> 00:22:13,640
Speaker 1: stayed out of school and worked at a restaurant had

528
00:22:13,640 --> 00:22:14,800
Speaker 1: I not pushed him to finish.

529
00:22:14,880 --> 00:22:16,440
Speaker 2: Fast forward to us getting married.

530
00:22:16,480 --> 00:22:19,080
Speaker 1: We were living in a family member's rent house and

531
00:22:19,320 --> 00:22:22,080
Speaker 1: I didn't understand why we weren't focusing on buying home.

532
00:22:22,160 --> 00:22:24,960
Speaker 1: We started trying for a baby, and when we got pregnant,

533
00:22:25,080 --> 00:22:27,080
Speaker 1: I talked to him about how important it was to

534
00:22:27,080 --> 00:22:29,199
Speaker 1: have a place that was ours when we brought our

535
00:22:29,200 --> 00:22:31,760
Speaker 1: baby home. He would listen and agree, but never really

536
00:22:31,800 --> 00:22:34,840
Speaker 1: took any actionable steps towards saving or anything.

537
00:22:34,880 --> 00:22:36,800
Speaker 2: That's the thing. I think he has just a totally

538
00:22:36,880 --> 00:22:40,960
Speaker 2: different take on money, Yeah, and to different relationship to it. Yeah,

539
00:22:40,960 --> 00:22:44,119
Speaker 2: because I've talked rich people before and I'm like, you

540
00:22:44,480 --> 00:22:47,480
Speaker 2: don't know how to deal with money. Right, it's just

541
00:22:47,560 --> 00:22:49,359
Speaker 2: kind of always there for me. Yeah, they're just like

542
00:22:49,720 --> 00:22:52,000
Speaker 2: you don't have to worry about it, but sometimes you do,

543
00:22:52,359 --> 00:22:53,199
Speaker 2: know as you got it.

544
00:22:53,200 --> 00:22:55,760
Speaker 1: It wasn't until I practically had a melt down and

545
00:22:55,800 --> 00:22:58,120
Speaker 1: found the house to look at and gave him an

546
00:22:58,160 --> 00:23:01,000
Speaker 1: ultimatum that we bought our first house. His job at

547
00:23:01,040 --> 00:23:03,080
Speaker 1: the time had him gone for weeks at a time,

548
00:23:03,200 --> 00:23:05,320
Speaker 1: which wasn't ideal with the new baby, so I started

549
00:23:05,359 --> 00:23:07,639
Speaker 1: talking to him about what his plans were so that

550
00:23:07,680 --> 00:23:09,640
Speaker 1: he could be home with us and work. He quit

551
00:23:09,680 --> 00:23:12,000
Speaker 1: his job and started working for a close family member

552
00:23:12,080 --> 00:23:15,040
Speaker 1: who ran a devil's lettuce grow making next to nothing,

553
00:23:15,160 --> 00:23:18,440
Speaker 1: and kept telling me that it was going to go somewhere,

554
00:23:18,480 --> 00:23:21,160
Speaker 1: that his boss had him on the path to make

555
00:23:21,240 --> 00:23:24,560
Speaker 1: six figures and that he would make commission on broker sales,

556
00:23:24,720 --> 00:23:27,439
Speaker 1: et cetera. Needless to say, this never happened. He was

557
00:23:27,480 --> 00:23:29,520
Speaker 1: able to get our kids on insurance paid for by

558
00:23:29,560 --> 00:23:32,320
Speaker 1: the company, and since our cars were used for work,

559
00:23:32,359 --> 00:23:34,359
Speaker 1: he was able to have the car payment paid for

560
00:23:34,640 --> 00:23:37,000
Speaker 1: by the company. I was working in a very competitive

561
00:23:37,000 --> 00:23:40,000
Speaker 1: industry which had me gone a lot, so our child

562
00:23:40,119 --> 00:23:43,000
Speaker 1: went to daycare around three months old. I hated my job,

563
00:23:43,040 --> 00:23:45,359
Speaker 1: but I was the breadwinner, and I felt like I

564
00:23:45,440 --> 00:23:48,480
Speaker 1: was trapped, even though it was a super toxic.

565
00:23:48,119 --> 00:23:50,080
Speaker 2: Environment and not good for my mental health.

566
00:23:50,119 --> 00:23:52,480
Speaker 1: I spoke with my partner regularly about this, and he

567
00:23:52,600 --> 00:23:55,240
Speaker 1: promised that he was looking for jobs related to his degree,

568
00:23:55,240 --> 00:23:57,800
Speaker 1: which would have paid much more, but he could never

569
00:23:57,920 --> 00:24:01,680
Speaker 1: find anything. This went on for years. He is still

570
00:24:02,000 --> 00:24:06,440
Speaker 1: looking for a job. Five years later, during the pandemic,

571
00:24:06,560 --> 00:24:08,800
Speaker 1: I was able to secure a work from home job,

572
00:24:09,080 --> 00:24:11,680
Speaker 1: making more money than I was before, and it's such

573
00:24:11,720 --> 00:24:12,680
Speaker 1: a better environment.

574
00:24:12,720 --> 00:24:15,280
Speaker 2: But this is where the house of cards start to fall.

575
00:24:15,440 --> 00:24:18,399
Speaker 1: About a year ago, my partner comes home panicked because

576
00:24:18,440 --> 00:24:20,880
Speaker 1: the grow lost their license to grow the plants.

577
00:24:21,320 --> 00:24:22,359
Speaker 2: Oh that's important.

578
00:24:22,400 --> 00:24:24,960
Speaker 1: They lost it because he missed the deadline for renewal.

579
00:24:25,200 --> 00:24:29,600
Speaker 1: It's dude, he had to let everyone go. The business

580
00:24:29,680 --> 00:24:32,520
Speaker 1: was not bringing in revenue and actually lost thousands of

581
00:24:32,560 --> 00:24:35,439
Speaker 1: dollars because they had to destroy everything currently in the

582
00:24:35,520 --> 00:24:38,440
Speaker 1: grow since legally they weren't supposed to have it.

583
00:24:38,520 --> 00:24:43,520
Speaker 2: Oh wow, sucks, wow, just smoke it all. There you go. Problems.

584
00:24:43,640 --> 00:24:45,240
Speaker 2: I don't like. We have to get rid of it.

585
00:24:46,280 --> 00:24:48,320
Speaker 1: When I was talking to him about it, I asked

586
00:24:48,359 --> 00:24:50,639
Speaker 1: him to really focus on getting a different job, because

587
00:24:50,680 --> 00:24:53,320
Speaker 1: he said something along the lines of I wasn't really

588
00:24:53,400 --> 00:24:55,640
Speaker 1: trying before, like I told you, Yeah, Like this time

589
00:24:55,680 --> 00:24:56,920
Speaker 1: i'll actually do it because before.

590
00:24:56,720 --> 00:24:58,760
Speaker 2: I wasn't doing anything. I actually was like twenty percent

591
00:24:58,920 --> 00:25:01,399
Speaker 2: this I'm fully right. Even though I told you I

592
00:25:01,440 --> 00:25:03,480
Speaker 2: was looking for a job, it wasn't. So this time

593
00:25:03,520 --> 00:25:06,000
Speaker 2: it'll be different. Actually don't work for years.

594
00:25:06,080 --> 00:25:08,919
Speaker 1: I came home crying, stressed out and upset because I

595
00:25:09,000 --> 00:25:11,639
Speaker 1: was so miserable at my job, and he was lying

596
00:25:11,680 --> 00:25:13,399
Speaker 1: to me about trying to find a job so that

597
00:25:13,480 --> 00:25:15,960
Speaker 1: I could get out of my current position. I cried

598
00:25:15,960 --> 00:25:18,160
Speaker 1: to him about not getting to see my baby because

599
00:25:18,200 --> 00:25:20,840
Speaker 1: they were asleep when I left early in the morning

600
00:25:20,840 --> 00:25:22,639
Speaker 1: and asleep when I got home late at night. And

601
00:25:22,680 --> 00:25:25,000
Speaker 1: he was lying to me about trying to find a

602
00:25:25,080 --> 00:25:27,199
Speaker 1: job so that he could help with the burden of

603
00:25:27,280 --> 00:25:28,440
Speaker 1: financial security.

604
00:25:28,560 --> 00:25:31,639
Speaker 2: That's so upsetting. I don't like this guy for years

605
00:25:32,080 --> 00:25:34,960
Speaker 2: years year. She brought it up years ago. That's insane.

606
00:25:35,160 --> 00:25:37,480
Speaker 1: It's been a year and he still has not found

607
00:25:37,480 --> 00:25:40,360
Speaker 1: a job. Oh, so he's actually looking now.

608
00:25:40,240 --> 00:25:43,399
Speaker 2: And he's actually looked later. It's not doing His active

609
00:25:43,440 --> 00:25:45,359
Speaker 2: looking is bad. It's so bad.

610
00:25:45,440 --> 00:25:47,880
Speaker 1: He spent eight months leaving in the morning and going

611
00:25:47,920 --> 00:25:50,320
Speaker 1: to his family member's house to help with odd end

612
00:25:50,400 --> 00:25:52,800
Speaker 1: jobs and acted like he was still working, only to

613
00:25:52,840 --> 00:25:55,439
Speaker 1: find out two months ago that he was not getting

614
00:25:55,440 --> 00:25:56,360
Speaker 1: a paycheck anymore.

615
00:25:56,600 --> 00:25:57,360
Speaker 2: That's insane.

616
00:25:57,400 --> 00:25:59,880
Speaker 1: You have a child, You have a child's a fam

617
00:26:00,640 --> 00:26:02,720
Speaker 1: need to contribute to. I asked him to help me

618
00:26:02,800 --> 00:26:05,440
Speaker 1: come up with a budget, take finance classes because he.

619
00:26:05,440 --> 00:26:07,359
Speaker 2: Has no idea how to manage finances.

620
00:26:07,480 --> 00:26:10,200
Speaker 1: I have investment accounts set up for our kids, a

621
00:26:10,280 --> 00:26:12,600
Speaker 1: four to oh one K, and short term investment accounts

622
00:26:12,640 --> 00:26:16,080
Speaker 1: for us. I have a small emergency fund. He doesn't

623
00:26:16,119 --> 00:26:18,960
Speaker 1: even have a savings account. This past year has been

624
00:26:19,000 --> 00:26:22,640
Speaker 1: super challenging for me mentally, and I've gotten on antidepressants

625
00:26:22,680 --> 00:26:25,199
Speaker 1: to help manage the anxiety and depression. I felt this

626
00:26:25,359 --> 00:26:28,399
Speaker 1: is such a long story, shorten it a bit. We

627
00:26:28,480 --> 00:26:30,960
Speaker 1: had to open a new bank account because my partner's

628
00:26:31,000 --> 00:26:34,679
Speaker 1: paycheck was coming from a business that is not federally legal.

629
00:26:34,760 --> 00:26:37,280
Speaker 1: Our bank account sent us a letter with a cashier's

630
00:26:37,359 --> 00:26:41,000
Speaker 1: check with our entire bank account asking us to not

631
00:26:41,160 --> 00:26:43,159
Speaker 1: try and open an account with them again. You have

632
00:26:43,240 --> 00:26:45,520
Speaker 1: rejected by a bank, he said, here is your money back.

633
00:26:45,720 --> 00:26:47,679
Speaker 2: We don't want to thank you.

634
00:26:47,960 --> 00:26:50,919
Speaker 1: My partner went and opened an account that approves, but

635
00:26:51,119 --> 00:26:53,600
Speaker 1: because I was working, he set the account up and

636
00:26:53,720 --> 00:26:56,040
Speaker 1: I was not initially at it. I asked him to

637
00:26:56,080 --> 00:26:59,399
Speaker 1: please just help manage our finances since I was handling

638
00:26:59,520 --> 00:27:01,760
Speaker 1: everything up. I found out a few weeks ago that

639
00:27:01,800 --> 00:27:04,160
Speaker 1: he was no longer getting a paycheck, that he let

640
00:27:04,200 --> 00:27:07,520
Speaker 1: our homeowners insurance renew without looking at the new feet,

641
00:27:07,640 --> 00:27:11,120
Speaker 1: that he started secretly charging their health insurance to his

642
00:27:11,160 --> 00:27:12,119
Speaker 1: credit card and.

643
00:27:12,000 --> 00:27:14,879
Speaker 2: Making our car payment. But you know what's never a

644
00:27:14,960 --> 00:27:17,040
Speaker 2: secret is us going live on.

645
00:27:16,960 --> 00:27:18,919
Speaker 1: YouTube every weekday at three pm PSD.

646
00:27:19,040 --> 00:27:20,840
Speaker 2: If you want to join it, just tap our profile,

647
00:27:20,920 --> 00:27:23,520
Speaker 2: tap it or tap it any final final class four.

648
00:27:23,720 --> 00:27:28,840
Speaker 2: Leave him, leave him. He's adding literally nothing, and you've

649
00:27:29,000 --> 00:27:31,880
Speaker 2: you've been dealing with this for five years.

650
00:27:32,080 --> 00:27:35,920
Speaker 1: He's actually taking away, he's taking, He's taking and taking.

651
00:27:36,000 --> 00:27:37,920
Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm sick of that seed.

652
00:27:38,720 --> 00:27:41,760
Speaker 1: I have been busting my butt and making the most

653
00:27:41,800 --> 00:27:44,040
Speaker 1: money I've ever made in my life, and we are

654
00:27:44,080 --> 00:27:47,440
Speaker 1: living paycheck to paycheck because he lied to me about

655
00:27:47,480 --> 00:27:51,000
Speaker 1: an additional two thousand dollars a month that we were spending,

656
00:27:51,200 --> 00:27:53,399
Speaker 1: and leaving out the fact that he was no longer

657
00:27:53,480 --> 00:27:56,639
Speaker 1: getting paid. Not only that, every single thing he does

658
00:27:56,920 --> 00:27:58,879
Speaker 1: he has to ask me about, like he has no

659
00:27:59,040 --> 00:28:02,639
Speaker 1: intuition or initiative to do things on his own. I

660
00:28:02,720 --> 00:28:05,960
Speaker 1: don't know how to move forward. I can't trust him

661
00:28:06,000 --> 00:28:08,880
Speaker 1: if he's not lying, he's being vague and leaving stuff out.

662
00:28:08,960 --> 00:28:11,360
Speaker 1: I just feel resentful and like I'm drowning, like I'm

663
00:28:11,400 --> 00:28:14,040
Speaker 1: just watching all of my goals sink under the weight

664
00:28:14,080 --> 00:28:17,040
Speaker 1: of his decisions. I am burnt out and lonely, like

665
00:28:17,080 --> 00:28:19,560
Speaker 1: I'm doing this all alone and he's just an extra

666
00:28:19,640 --> 00:28:21,080
Speaker 1: child that I have to plan for.

667
00:28:21,160 --> 00:28:24,479
Speaker 2: And that's the end. That's so sorry. Yeah, you need

668
00:28:24,520 --> 00:28:27,479
Speaker 2: to leave him? Yeah, yeah, I mean at least I

669
00:28:27,480 --> 00:28:32,359
Speaker 2: think that is the best plan, best way forward, because

670
00:28:32,400 --> 00:28:36,080
Speaker 2: he's just he's not contributing. You're stressed out because you

671
00:28:36,119 --> 00:28:39,320
Speaker 2: have to explain everything to him. Yes, and he's just

672
00:28:39,360 --> 00:28:42,080
Speaker 2: like another child that is also just actively taking all

673
00:28:42,080 --> 00:28:44,600
Speaker 2: of your money. Right, you have to do and pay

674
00:28:44,640 --> 00:28:47,160
Speaker 2: for everything. Yeah, you have to fix all his mistakes.

675
00:28:47,280 --> 00:28:50,840
Speaker 1: Yes, And it's just like, yeah, I feel like you

676
00:28:51,200 --> 00:28:54,080
Speaker 1: just say, like you know, either step it up or

677
00:28:54,200 --> 00:28:56,600
Speaker 1: I'm out here. Yeah, I feel like this can't decisionly

678
00:28:56,640 --> 00:28:57,560
Speaker 1: against ultimatoms.

679
00:28:57,600 --> 00:28:59,680
Speaker 2: But this feels like a person. Yeah, it's like you

680
00:29:00,080 --> 00:29:02,880
Speaker 2: read time. This is not working anymore. I feel like

681
00:29:02,960 --> 00:29:04,880
Speaker 2: I am alone in this partnership.

682
00:29:05,000 --> 00:29:07,960
Speaker 1: Yes, and I can't financially pay for us because I'm

683
00:29:08,000 --> 00:29:08,960
Speaker 1: living paycheck.

684
00:29:09,000 --> 00:29:10,160
Speaker 2: Don't want to live like that anymore.

685
00:29:10,200 --> 00:29:14,760
Speaker 1: We have a child, so peace out, deal with it

686
00:29:14,800 --> 00:29:17,440
Speaker 1: on your own. I'll see you when I drop off

687
00:29:17,440 --> 00:29:18,080
Speaker 1: the kids.

688
00:29:19,040 --> 00:29:21,640
Speaker 2: There you go. Yeah, but that is the end of

689
00:29:21,680 --> 00:29:25,280
Speaker 2: that story. That's the end, and that's the end of

690
00:29:25,280 --> 00:29:28,160
Speaker 2: the episode. So if you love us, make sure to

691
00:29:28,160 --> 00:29:32,520
Speaker 2: subscribe We love you and see it tomorrow. My sister

692
00:29:32,640 --> 00:29:36,160
Speaker 2: tried to steal my wedding dress, so I destroyed her

693
00:29:36,200 --> 00:29:39,560
Speaker 2: bridesmade dress and for an eye and a dress for

694
00:29:39,680 --> 00:29:43,560
Speaker 2: a dress. I twenty three female, and my sister twenty

695
00:29:43,560 --> 00:29:46,800
Speaker 2: five female, are both due to be married soon, or

696
00:29:46,840 --> 00:29:52,440
Speaker 2: at least I am foreshadowing. My sister's boyfriend of three

697
00:29:52,520 --> 00:29:55,600
Speaker 2: years told my parents he plans to propose to her soon,

698
00:29:56,040 --> 00:29:58,520
Speaker 2: and my sister Jane has been picking up on hints

699
00:29:58,640 --> 00:30:01,600
Speaker 2: that he is and been wanting to be included in

700
00:30:01,680 --> 00:30:05,400
Speaker 2: marriage conversation and is already planning her wedding, so she

701
00:30:05,400 --> 00:30:07,800
Speaker 2: hasn't even been proposed to but she's like, well, I

702
00:30:07,880 --> 00:30:10,360
Speaker 2: might as well get ahead. By the way, this comes

703
00:30:10,400 --> 00:30:12,640
Speaker 2: from no Tank five three to two on the Okay

704
00:30:12,640 --> 00:30:17,280
Speaker 2: storytime subreddit. So my fiance proposed to me six months ago.

705
00:30:17,840 --> 00:30:21,360
Speaker 2: I'm absolutely elated and cannot wait to marry this man.

706
00:30:21,600 --> 00:30:24,600
Speaker 2: Wedding planning has gone smoothly so far, with Jane being

707
00:30:24,600 --> 00:30:27,400
Speaker 2: a little bit nosy. But I just assume. But I

708
00:30:27,600 --> 00:30:30,560
Speaker 2: just assumed she was so excited, so I brushed it off.

709
00:30:30,600 --> 00:30:33,320
Speaker 2: For some context, my sister Jane has always had some

710
00:30:33,440 --> 00:30:37,160
Speaker 2: jealousy issues and held some resentment towards me for being

711
00:30:37,240 --> 00:30:40,200
Speaker 2: the favorite, spoiled youngest child.

712
00:30:40,880 --> 00:30:41,400
Speaker 3: Growing up.

713
00:30:41,440 --> 00:30:43,360
Speaker 2: She was put under a lot of pressure by her

714
00:30:43,400 --> 00:30:46,120
Speaker 2: parents to be perfect. Well, I could be more carefree

715
00:30:46,240 --> 00:30:49,080
Speaker 2: and seem to get what I want. I understand where

716
00:30:49,080 --> 00:30:51,840
Speaker 2: she's coming from. But because of this she can't. She

717
00:30:51,920 --> 00:30:54,960
Speaker 2: can treat me badly sometimes. I was a bit cautious

718
00:30:54,960 --> 00:30:57,080
Speaker 2: at first. I was afraid Jane was going to throw

719
00:30:57,120 --> 00:31:00,200
Speaker 2: a fit or something about me being engaged before her,

720
00:31:00,840 --> 00:31:05,040
Speaker 2: but she didn't. I dismissed her nosiness as excitement. I mean,

721
00:31:05,120 --> 00:31:07,840
Speaker 2: with her boyfriend dropping so many hints to her, who

722
00:31:07,880 --> 00:31:10,800
Speaker 2: wouldn't be a bit nosy about someone else's wedding. I

723
00:31:10,840 --> 00:31:14,000
Speaker 2: also included her in my bridal party. I made her

724
00:31:14,040 --> 00:31:16,600
Speaker 2: one of my bridesmaids, so she was over the moon

725
00:31:16,760 --> 00:31:19,960
Speaker 2: about that, and I thought her sibling relationship was improving.

726
00:31:20,440 --> 00:31:26,040
Speaker 2: I was wrong, though, no alas no. I decided to

727
00:31:26,040 --> 00:31:28,400
Speaker 2: go wedding dress shopping with my mom and my sister

728
00:31:28,560 --> 00:31:32,600
Speaker 2: a little over two weeks ago. This was super exciting

729
00:31:32,680 --> 00:31:35,120
Speaker 2: for me. I've been picturing the perfect wedding dress for

730
00:31:35,200 --> 00:31:39,480
Speaker 2: myself for the longest time. Now. Shopping was amazing. I

731
00:31:39,520 --> 00:31:42,960
Speaker 2: thought like a princess the entire time, and both my

732
00:31:43,040 --> 00:31:47,040
Speaker 2: mom and Jane seemed genuinely supportive the entire time. Well,

733
00:31:47,240 --> 00:31:51,320
Speaker 2: after many hours of shopping, I found the perfect dress.

734
00:31:51,720 --> 00:31:55,440
Speaker 2: It made me feel absolutely beautiful, and honestly, it's everything

735
00:31:55,480 --> 00:31:58,400
Speaker 2: I wanted. It was one hundred percent yes the first

736
00:31:58,440 --> 00:32:02,240
Speaker 2: time I tried it on, and honestly fit perfectly in

737
00:32:02,440 --> 00:32:05,720
Speaker 2: my budget. I noticed Jane was just as in love

738
00:32:05,720 --> 00:32:08,960
Speaker 2: with the dresses I was. She showered me with dozens

739
00:32:08,960 --> 00:32:12,240
Speaker 2: of compliments and almost seemed too happy I was buying it.

740
00:32:12,760 --> 00:32:15,040
Speaker 2: I shrugged it off, though, I was just happy to

741
00:32:15,080 --> 00:32:18,560
Speaker 2: be supported by my sister. I don't think Jane's behavior

742
00:32:18,680 --> 00:32:21,520
Speaker 2: was strange until the night after when she talked to

743
00:32:21,720 --> 00:32:24,040
Speaker 2: or she asked to talk with me. She said she

744
00:32:24,080 --> 00:32:26,680
Speaker 2: had talked with her boyfriend and after doing some thinking,

745
00:32:26,880 --> 00:32:29,320
Speaker 2: she said that she wanted to re wear my wedding

746
00:32:29,400 --> 00:32:32,400
Speaker 2: dress for her wedding. She said it would be more

747
00:32:32,400 --> 00:32:35,480
Speaker 2: efficient and good for her budget since we're the same

748
00:32:35,600 --> 00:32:38,360
Speaker 2: size and my wedding dress ticked all of her boxes.

749
00:32:38,760 --> 00:32:41,680
Speaker 2: I was shocked at this. Maybe I'm selfish or greedy,

750
00:32:41,760 --> 00:32:44,080
Speaker 2: but the whole point of my wedding dress and experience

751
00:32:44,360 --> 00:32:47,320
Speaker 2: is it's my wedding dress uniquely for me.

752
00:32:47,720 --> 00:32:47,960
Speaker 3: Yeah.

753
00:32:48,000 --> 00:32:50,400
Speaker 2: I get that people will have the same wedding dress,

754
00:32:50,520 --> 00:32:54,080
Speaker 2: but I don't want, of all people, my sister to

755
00:32:54,120 --> 00:32:56,800
Speaker 2: wear the same wedding dress as me. It honestly felt

756
00:32:56,800 --> 00:32:58,960
Speaker 2: like she was trying to steal the spotlight from me

757
00:32:59,120 --> 00:33:01,160
Speaker 2: in some way. I told her that she could get

758
00:33:01,200 --> 00:33:03,320
Speaker 2: a wedding dress in a similar style to mine if

759
00:33:03,320 --> 00:33:06,320
Speaker 2: she wanted, or even buy the same dress. I wouldn't

760
00:33:06,360 --> 00:33:08,800
Speaker 2: like this, but whatever, but I wasn't going to let

761
00:33:08,840 --> 00:33:12,000
Speaker 2: her re wear my wedding dress because it's mine and

762
00:33:12,040 --> 00:33:15,840
Speaker 2: it represents my experience. And honestly, I told her if

763
00:33:16,000 --> 00:33:19,200
Speaker 2: it felt like she was trying to steal my spotlight again.

764
00:33:20,040 --> 00:33:22,120
Speaker 2: She got very upset at this. She said that since

765
00:33:22,160 --> 00:33:24,719
Speaker 2: we're sisters, we should be sharing stuff like this, and

766
00:33:24,760 --> 00:33:28,200
Speaker 2: she said she thought her relationship was improving. I accused

767
00:33:28,200 --> 00:33:31,040
Speaker 2: her of faking her tears and just trying to steal

768
00:33:31,120 --> 00:33:34,080
Speaker 2: the spotlight from me again. I said some mean things

769
00:33:34,160 --> 00:33:36,840
Speaker 2: I regret, and called her cheap for not just getting

770
00:33:36,840 --> 00:33:39,000
Speaker 2: her own wedding dress, and I told her she can't

771
00:33:39,000 --> 00:33:42,040
Speaker 2: plan for a wedding she's not even sure is happening yet.

772
00:33:42,120 --> 00:33:44,560
Speaker 2: She repeated some of the stuff she said before and

773
00:33:44,640 --> 00:33:47,800
Speaker 2: cried a little bit more of crocodile tears. But after

774
00:33:47,880 --> 00:33:50,720
Speaker 2: I didn't breack down, she basically was like, okay, if

775
00:33:50,720 --> 00:33:53,840
Speaker 2: that's what you want, and I assumed our fight was over.

776
00:33:54,680 --> 00:33:56,160
Speaker 2: She was a little bit cold to me for the

777
00:33:56,160 --> 00:33:59,320
Speaker 2: next few days, but sometimes she can be like that,

778
00:33:59,440 --> 00:34:02,600
Speaker 2: so I paid no mind to it. Well, I was

779
00:34:02,640 --> 00:34:05,840
Speaker 2: wrong about the fight being over. About one week ago,

780
00:34:06,040 --> 00:34:08,240
Speaker 2: I looked in the storage room at my mom's house

781
00:34:08,320 --> 00:34:11,960
Speaker 2: where my dress was being kept, and it was gone. Obviously,

782
00:34:12,160 --> 00:34:16,040
Speaker 2: this made me completely flip my crap. I looked everywhere

783
00:34:16,080 --> 00:34:18,759
Speaker 2: in the house top to bottom and I couldn't find it.

784
00:34:19,040 --> 00:34:21,120
Speaker 2: My mom and my sister were the only ones who

785
00:34:21,200 --> 00:34:23,120
Speaker 2: knew where the dress was being kept, so I went

786
00:34:23,160 --> 00:34:25,719
Speaker 2: to question them. Both both of them said they had

787
00:34:25,760 --> 00:34:28,960
Speaker 2: no idea where it was. I grilled my sister a

788
00:34:28,960 --> 00:34:31,359
Speaker 2: bit harder, since she has a tendency to lie about

789
00:34:31,360 --> 00:34:34,759
Speaker 2: stuff like this sometimes, but she genuinely seemed like she

790
00:34:34,840 --> 00:34:37,000
Speaker 2: didn't know where it was. I was about to have

791
00:34:37,080 --> 00:34:39,880
Speaker 2: a panic attack over this. I looked for three hours

792
00:34:39,880 --> 00:34:42,680
Speaker 2: by myself. My mom and my fiance were at work,

793
00:34:42,719 --> 00:34:45,279
Speaker 2: and my sister was out with her boyfriend. I thought,

794
00:34:45,280 --> 00:34:48,640
Speaker 2: I looked everywhere until I took a break to eat lunch.

795
00:34:49,600 --> 00:34:52,560
Speaker 2: The trash was full, so I took it out and

796
00:34:52,760 --> 00:34:58,440
Speaker 2: lo and behold, what's in the dumpster? My wedding dress?

797
00:35:00,520 --> 00:35:04,720
Speaker 2: Maybe maybe dang so that Yeah, no, your sister's fullying

798
00:35:04,760 --> 00:35:06,640
Speaker 2: the wrong. Yeah, fully in the wrong.

799
00:35:06,760 --> 00:35:10,319
Speaker 3: True, But maybe your sister wouldn't have slam dunk your

800
00:35:10,320 --> 00:35:13,560
Speaker 3: wedding dress into the dumpster if you weren't slam dunking

801
00:35:13,640 --> 00:35:16,200
Speaker 3: on her about not being engaged.

802
00:35:16,960 --> 00:35:20,080
Speaker 2: But I feel like that before it was like yay,

803
00:35:20,400 --> 00:35:22,680
Speaker 2: like we don't have to go that low, But now

804
00:35:22,719 --> 00:35:25,799
Speaker 2: she went like she dug six feet under she did.

805
00:35:25,960 --> 00:35:29,239
Speaker 3: And now I gotta say that I understand. Maybe why

806
00:35:29,440 --> 00:35:32,800
Speaker 3: you're slam dunking on your saving makes sense.

807
00:35:32,960 --> 00:35:36,480
Speaker 2: Why we have this kind of tumultuous relationship.

808
00:35:37,000 --> 00:35:40,080
Speaker 3: That's crazy. You guys might both be a fault.

809
00:35:39,800 --> 00:35:43,279
Speaker 2: Here in a trash gunk on it, but nothing that

810
00:35:43,280 --> 00:35:46,960
Speaker 2: couldn't be washed out. So thankfully it was okay. I

811
00:35:47,000 --> 00:35:50,280
Speaker 2: am so glad it turned out okay. But I was pissed.

812
00:35:50,760 --> 00:35:53,360
Speaker 2: Who would put my perfect dream dress in the dumpster

813
00:35:53,560 --> 00:35:56,759
Speaker 2: with all the trash? Deep down I knew it, but

814
00:35:56,800 --> 00:35:59,160
Speaker 2: I didn't want to believe my sister would do that

815
00:35:59,200 --> 00:36:02,880
Speaker 2: to me. Well, surprisingly, the moment I called my sister,

816
00:36:03,560 --> 00:36:06,279
Speaker 2: she confessed she didn't seem to regret it either. She

817
00:36:06,400 --> 00:36:08,720
Speaker 2: just said if she couldn't wear my dress, I didn't

818
00:36:08,719 --> 00:36:11,480
Speaker 2: deserve to wear it either. Wow. And she said if

819
00:36:11,520 --> 00:36:14,440
Speaker 2: she could do it again, she would. Jane told me

820
00:36:14,480 --> 00:36:17,440
Speaker 2: the dress is completely fine, so I can't be that mad,

821
00:36:17,840 --> 00:36:19,400
Speaker 2: And she said that I'm used to getting what I

822
00:36:19,440 --> 00:36:21,440
Speaker 2: want all the time, so she was just trying to

823
00:36:21,480 --> 00:36:24,120
Speaker 2: put me in my place. She said she didn't actually

824
00:36:24,200 --> 00:36:27,759
Speaker 2: intend to throw away the dress, but she did throw

825
00:36:27,800 --> 00:36:28,600
Speaker 2: away the dress.

826
00:36:28,800 --> 00:36:32,200
Speaker 3: She's like, I didn't look I didn't. She's just freestyling,

827
00:36:32,440 --> 00:36:35,200
Speaker 3: all right, and it kind of the moment got it happened.

828
00:36:35,440 --> 00:36:37,720
Speaker 3: I put your dress in the dump. It's called improvisation.

829
00:36:38,000 --> 00:36:39,680
Speaker 3: It can't even be mad because you got.

830
00:36:39,520 --> 00:36:41,880
Speaker 2: It back and was going to take it out of

831
00:36:41,920 --> 00:36:44,799
Speaker 2: the garbage if I didn't find it. I don't believe her.

832
00:36:45,040 --> 00:36:48,160
Speaker 2: I do regret my actions after this. I will admit

833
00:36:48,239 --> 00:36:50,520
Speaker 2: I mostly acted out of rage, and I can be

834
00:36:50,560 --> 00:36:53,520
Speaker 2: an impulsive person when I'm angry. Right after I hung

835
00:36:53,600 --> 00:36:55,799
Speaker 2: up the phone with my sister, I grabbed a pair

836
00:36:55,840 --> 00:36:59,440
Speaker 2: of kitchen scissors, ran up to her room where she

837
00:36:59,600 --> 00:37:03,320
Speaker 2: was keeping her bridesmaid's dress that she spent five hundred

838
00:37:03,360 --> 00:37:07,160
Speaker 2: dollars on, and took scissors to it. I ripped it

839
00:37:07,200 --> 00:37:11,439
Speaker 2: with my hands too. I absolutely destroyed her dress until

840
00:37:11,480 --> 00:37:13,960
Speaker 2: it didn't look like a dress anymore. I went back

841
00:37:14,000 --> 00:37:16,279
Speaker 2: to my apartment after this and have not spoken to

842
00:37:16,280 --> 00:37:19,759
Speaker 2: my sister since. My mom is pissed at me. I've

843
00:37:19,760 --> 00:37:22,359
Speaker 2: been pissed at you too. She's pissed at my sister too,

844
00:37:22,880 --> 00:37:25,680
Speaker 2: but she thinks I should have handled the situation more maturely,

845
00:37:25,719 --> 00:37:28,040
Speaker 2: because two wrongs don't make a right. She thinks I

846
00:37:28,040 --> 00:37:30,280
Speaker 2: should have had a proper talk with my sister about

847
00:37:30,320 --> 00:37:33,680
Speaker 2: boundaries instead of jumping straight to ruining her bridesmaid dress

848
00:37:33,800 --> 00:37:35,480
Speaker 2: that she loved so much and spent a lot of

849
00:37:35,520 --> 00:37:38,360
Speaker 2: money on. My fiance is mostly on my side, but

850
00:37:38,400 --> 00:37:40,520
Speaker 2: thinks it was silly of me to destroy a bride'smaid

851
00:37:40,600 --> 00:37:44,200
Speaker 2: dress that's supposed to be for my own wedding. By

852
00:37:44,280 --> 00:37:48,600
Speaker 2: the way, you can join us live every weekday on YouTube, Facebook,

853
00:37:48,719 --> 00:37:51,840
Speaker 2: and TikTok. Just top her profile just three pmpst.

854
00:37:52,640 --> 00:37:54,040
Speaker 3: We could be live right now.

855
00:37:54,080 --> 00:37:56,480
Speaker 2: Both my sister and her boyfriend are pissed at me,

856
00:37:56,600 --> 00:37:59,799
Speaker 2: and my sister spanned my phone with texts disinvited me

857
00:37:59,840 --> 00:38:02,359
Speaker 2: for of her future wedding. So I guess I lost

858
00:38:02,400 --> 00:38:05,040
Speaker 2: one of my bridesmaids and maybe more because my sister

859
00:38:05,120 --> 00:38:07,239
Speaker 2: is spreading rumors that I'm psycho to the rest of

860
00:38:07,239 --> 00:38:10,719
Speaker 2: the bridal party. Okay, are there rumors? Yeah, they're true.

861
00:38:11,040 --> 00:38:15,600
Speaker 3: I mean going straight to you've recovered your wedding dress

862
00:38:15,840 --> 00:38:20,319
Speaker 3: from it's fine, it's relatively okay. Yeah, then you go

863
00:38:20,560 --> 00:38:24,239
Speaker 3: destroyed beyond any hope of repair. Yeah, your sister's dood.

864
00:38:24,360 --> 00:38:25,360
Speaker 2: You can't do anything about it.

865
00:38:25,440 --> 00:38:27,480
Speaker 3: You've now escalated the fight.

866
00:38:27,760 --> 00:38:31,800
Speaker 2: Yeah, they don't even know my side because I didn't

867
00:38:31,800 --> 00:38:34,600
Speaker 2: even let them know about the situation because I was embarrassed.

868
00:38:34,960 --> 00:38:37,440
Speaker 2: I do regret my actions, but I'm very upset with

869
00:38:37,440 --> 00:38:39,880
Speaker 2: my sister and think I'm a bit justified in what

870
00:38:39,960 --> 00:38:43,240
Speaker 2: I did. You mess with my dress and I'll mess

871
00:38:43,280 --> 00:38:45,960
Speaker 2: with yours? Am I the a hole? You're all the

872
00:38:46,000 --> 00:38:48,319
Speaker 2: a hole. You guys both kind of suck. Yeah, you

873
00:38:48,320 --> 00:38:52,160
Speaker 2: guys suck. The problem here isn't even this fight.

874
00:38:52,560 --> 00:38:55,080
Speaker 3: This fight is happening from a what I'm going to

875
00:38:55,160 --> 00:38:57,759
Speaker 3: assume is a culmination of things that have happened.

876
00:38:57,440 --> 00:39:00,879
Speaker 2: Over over their whole childhood lifetime. I think they both

877
00:39:00,920 --> 00:39:02,040
Speaker 2: think that they're the golden child.

878
00:39:02,480 --> 00:39:05,759
Speaker 3: Yeah. Well, clearly there's a dynamic between the two of

879
00:39:05,760 --> 00:39:08,480
Speaker 3: them where they're like flying for attention, right, They're trying

880
00:39:08,520 --> 00:39:10,920
Speaker 3: to constantly, they're trying to get up, like get one

881
00:39:11,000 --> 00:39:11,520
Speaker 3: up on each other.

882
00:39:11,640 --> 00:39:12,719
Speaker 2: Yeah. Instead of just.

883
00:39:12,680 --> 00:39:15,759
Speaker 3: Being like we're sisters, love each other, they're like, you're

884
00:39:15,800 --> 00:39:18,520
Speaker 3: my sister, Get you loser.

885
00:39:19,120 --> 00:39:23,919
Speaker 2: Sisters by chance, enemies by choice, that's what's going on here.

886
00:39:24,200 --> 00:39:27,640
Speaker 3: There you go. Yeah, they put that one on the quotables.

887
00:39:28,640 --> 00:39:35,799
Speaker 3: Sisters by chance, enemies by choice. You watch them take

888
00:39:35,840 --> 00:39:38,320
Speaker 3: turns just dunking on each.

889
00:39:38,120 --> 00:39:40,040
Speaker 2: Other, dunking straight dunking.

890
00:39:40,400 --> 00:39:44,879
Speaker 3: My sister wants to reconcile with her cheater X. I'm

891
00:39:44,960 --> 00:39:46,919
Speaker 3: fed up with both of them at this point.

892
00:39:47,000 --> 00:39:48,480
Speaker 2: Yeah, I'd be pretty pissed.

893
00:39:49,000 --> 00:39:51,200
Speaker 3: How are you gonna get back with the Cheetowski Man?

894
00:39:52,239 --> 00:39:52,439
Speaker 2: Hi?

895
00:39:52,560 --> 00:39:55,520
Speaker 3: Everyone, this is the first time I've ever posted on Reddit,

896
00:39:55,560 --> 00:39:57,960
Speaker 3: but I've been a listener of the show for years.

897
00:39:58,239 --> 00:39:59,839
Speaker 3: I need advice on what to do with my little

898
00:39:59,840 --> 00:40:03,600
Speaker 3: s twenty three female. My sister Kelsey recently went through

899
00:40:03,640 --> 00:40:06,560
Speaker 3: a divorce from her husband of almost two years. None

900
00:40:06,600 --> 00:40:08,760
Speaker 3: of the family liked him before they got married because

901
00:40:08,760 --> 00:40:11,680
Speaker 3: he had controlling tendencies and there could be a whole

902
00:40:11,719 --> 00:40:14,279
Speaker 3: other post of the red flags that she missed and

903
00:40:14,480 --> 00:40:16,080
Speaker 3: was overall not a good person.

904
00:40:17,120 --> 00:40:17,520
Speaker 2: By the way.

905
00:40:17,560 --> 00:40:20,040
Speaker 3: This comes from user new Girl four four four on

906
00:40:20,080 --> 00:40:22,440
Speaker 3: the r slash Okay storytime, So I read it so

907
00:40:23,440 --> 00:40:27,040
Speaker 3: my parents. My parents' relationship with Kelsey was also strained

908
00:40:27,120 --> 00:40:30,880
Speaker 3: because she moved him into her apartment while they were dating.

909
00:40:31,120 --> 00:40:33,400
Speaker 3: I should note that my parents were paying for her

910
00:40:33,440 --> 00:40:36,440
Speaker 3: tuition and apartment at that time, and their rule was

911
00:40:36,440 --> 00:40:39,239
Speaker 3: that they would not be financing us living with our partners,

912
00:40:39,600 --> 00:40:42,280
Speaker 3: we could live with them when we paid our own expenses.

913
00:40:42,680 --> 00:40:44,759
Speaker 3: My sister kept asking if she could move him in

914
00:40:44,800 --> 00:40:47,719
Speaker 3: and they kept saying no, so she moved him in secretly.

915
00:40:48,280 --> 00:40:50,759
Speaker 3: When they got caught, he made Kelsey deal with it

916
00:40:50,800 --> 00:40:53,040
Speaker 3: by herself and then tried to trash our parents on

917
00:40:53,080 --> 00:40:56,160
Speaker 3: social media because they stopped paying for the apartment. Like

918
00:40:56,239 --> 00:41:00,920
Speaker 3: I said, strained relationship, but there was some creativity when

919
00:41:00,960 --> 00:41:04,479
Speaker 3: he was around. For not creativity ctiviility, my parents would

920
00:41:04,480 --> 00:41:06,680
Speaker 3: get him the same number of presents as everyone else

921
00:41:06,719 --> 00:41:08,680
Speaker 3: for Christmas, and my dad would try to talk to

922
00:41:08,760 --> 00:41:12,080
Speaker 3: him about his job. Around June, he called her while

923
00:41:12,120 --> 00:41:14,560
Speaker 3: he was away for work and said that he wanted

924
00:41:14,640 --> 00:41:17,640
Speaker 3: a divorce. He said it was because he wanted to

925
00:41:17,680 --> 00:41:20,080
Speaker 3: work his new job without having to worry about a

926
00:41:20,120 --> 00:41:23,080
Speaker 3: wife and responsibilities back home. She called me that night

927
00:41:23,120 --> 00:41:25,919
Speaker 3: distraw and I drove two hours at midnight to be there.

928
00:41:26,160 --> 00:41:28,480
Speaker 3: When I was with Kelsey helping her pack, it was

929
00:41:28,480 --> 00:41:32,000
Speaker 3: discovered that her husband's real reasoning behind the divorce was

930
00:41:32,040 --> 00:41:35,360
Speaker 3: that he was cheating with his new boss's daughter. He

931
00:41:35,440 --> 00:41:38,680
Speaker 3: sent her a snapchat that said on the phone getting

932
00:41:38,680 --> 00:41:42,320
Speaker 3: a divorce Go team. They had multiple photos sent to

933
00:41:42,360 --> 00:41:45,960
Speaker 3: each other, and whole conversations about a love compatibility test

934
00:41:45,960 --> 00:41:48,120
Speaker 3: that they took. My family and I helped move her

935
00:41:48,160 --> 00:41:50,960
Speaker 3: back home, trying to be as supportive as possible. Kelsey

936
00:41:50,960 --> 00:41:52,799
Speaker 3: and I decided to rent a house together so that

937
00:41:52,840 --> 00:41:55,239
Speaker 3: our dogs could have a backyard and it would save

938
00:41:55,280 --> 00:41:57,200
Speaker 3: us some money. A week after we signed the lease,

939
00:41:57,360 --> 00:42:00,359
Speaker 3: which is a month after the divorce was finalized, her

940
00:42:00,440 --> 00:42:04,279
Speaker 3: ex husband messaged her stating that he messed up and

941
00:42:04,360 --> 00:42:07,800
Speaker 3: wanted her back after his relationship ended with the boss' daughter.

942
00:42:08,000 --> 00:42:11,680
Speaker 3: She has been talking to him again and lying about

943
00:42:11,680 --> 00:42:15,640
Speaker 3: seeing her friend Reagan when she's actually going to see him.

944
00:42:16,080 --> 00:42:18,440
Speaker 3: She didn't know that I knew the truth until recently

945
00:42:18,480 --> 00:42:21,520
Speaker 3: because I was hoping that this was a fleeting decision.

946
00:42:22,080 --> 00:42:25,120
Speaker 3: Kelsey is an individual who if you disagree with her decisions,

947
00:42:25,320 --> 00:42:27,879
Speaker 3: she will double down. She has been trying to drop

948
00:42:27,960 --> 00:42:30,520
Speaker 3: hints in our conversation since we moved to try and

949
00:42:30,520 --> 00:42:34,240
Speaker 3: support him, like all men cheat, which is not true.

950
00:42:34,280 --> 00:42:38,279
Speaker 3: It's not true, uh, and God loves everyone no matter

951
00:42:38,280 --> 00:42:40,600
Speaker 3: what they've done. I've had to come back with examples

952
00:42:40,600 --> 00:42:44,360
Speaker 3: to dissuade her statements like our brother and our dad

953
00:42:44,480 --> 00:42:47,440
Speaker 3: have never cheated. God can still love someone but not

954
00:42:47,719 --> 00:42:51,439
Speaker 3: have them in his vicinity because their actions have consequences

955
00:42:51,520 --> 00:42:56,200
Speaker 3: aka sending them to the to the bad place. Everything

956
00:42:56,239 --> 00:42:58,880
Speaker 3: came to a head last weekend when we finally talked

957
00:42:58,920 --> 00:43:02,040
Speaker 3: about it. She kept saying that she needs to see

958
00:43:02,080 --> 00:43:05,239
Speaker 3: if she can make her marriage work for herself, and

959
00:43:05,360 --> 00:43:08,200
Speaker 3: who's to say he can't change to what she needs

960
00:43:08,280 --> 00:43:11,560
Speaker 3: him to be. I kept saying that I get that

961
00:43:11,719 --> 00:43:14,200
Speaker 3: she had so much love for him, but he didn't

962
00:43:14,239 --> 00:43:16,960
Speaker 3: have love for her, and he wouldn't have cheated and

963
00:43:17,000 --> 00:43:20,319
Speaker 3: broken up their marriage over the phone. It won't work

964
00:43:20,320 --> 00:43:22,720
Speaker 3: out the way she wants it to. People don't change

965
00:43:22,719 --> 00:43:26,560
Speaker 3: that fundamentally in two months. I don't know how to

966
00:43:26,600 --> 00:43:28,440
Speaker 3: get through to her that her self worth is so

967
00:43:28,560 --> 00:43:31,120
Speaker 3: much more than going back to a cheater who ended

968
00:43:31,160 --> 00:43:34,640
Speaker 3: things over a phone call. There are seven billion people

969
00:43:34,719 --> 00:43:37,479
Speaker 3: in the world, and she wants to stick with this one.

970
00:43:38,080 --> 00:43:40,120
Speaker 3: I also told her that I don't want her bringing

971
00:43:40,160 --> 00:43:43,040
Speaker 3: him over to our shared home. I loathe him and

972
00:43:43,160 --> 00:43:45,120
Speaker 3: don't trust him as far as I can throw him.

973
00:43:45,400 --> 00:43:47,719
Speaker 3: I genuinely believe he would do something to me, my

974
00:43:47,760 --> 00:43:50,000
Speaker 3: stuff or my dog to get me to move out

975
00:43:50,280 --> 00:43:52,759
Speaker 3: so he could move in and mooch off of Kelsey again.

976
00:43:53,560 --> 00:43:55,880
Speaker 3: We have not had a conversation unless it pertains to

977
00:43:55,920 --> 00:43:59,359
Speaker 3: the house. Since that conversation, she asked me if I'm

978
00:43:59,440 --> 00:44:02,239
Speaker 3: really going to ice her out, and I explained that

979
00:44:02,360 --> 00:44:05,600
Speaker 3: I'm not icing her out, but I'm going to pretend that,

980
00:44:06,320 --> 00:44:09,200
Speaker 3: but I'm not going to pretend that I support what

981
00:44:09,360 --> 00:44:12,160
Speaker 3: she's doing to be all buddy buddy with her. I

982
00:44:12,920 --> 00:44:15,319
Speaker 3: am so angry that she just kept lying to my

983
00:44:15,360 --> 00:44:18,080
Speaker 3: face to sneak off to see him and then would

984
00:44:18,120 --> 00:44:21,640
Speaker 3: be totally okay with it. She justifies it by saying

985
00:44:21,640 --> 00:44:23,360
Speaker 3: that she knew this is how I would I was

986
00:44:23,400 --> 00:44:25,719
Speaker 3: going to react. I told her that it doesn't make

987
00:44:25,760 --> 00:44:28,960
Speaker 3: it right. Lying straight to my face and getting mad

988
00:44:29,000 --> 00:44:32,160
Speaker 3: when I would ask questions is not okay if you

989
00:44:32,200 --> 00:44:34,120
Speaker 3: think having him back in your life is such a

990
00:44:34,160 --> 00:44:37,400
Speaker 3: good decision. I told her, I'm setting the boundary that

991
00:44:37,600 --> 00:44:40,560
Speaker 3: if she has him in her life, then I'm gonna

992
00:44:40,600 --> 00:44:43,160
Speaker 3: take a step back. I will treat her as a roommate,

993
00:44:43,239 --> 00:44:44,640
Speaker 3: but I will not go out of my way to

994
00:44:44,680 --> 00:44:46,640
Speaker 3: hang out with her. I stood up for her the

995
00:44:46,680 --> 00:44:49,200
Speaker 3: first time and supported her even when I didn't like

996
00:44:49,239 --> 00:44:51,880
Speaker 3: the relationship. But I don't think I can mentally do

997
00:44:52,000 --> 00:44:55,240
Speaker 3: it again. I was stuck playing mediator in my family

998
00:44:55,280 --> 00:44:58,080
Speaker 3: and having to watch this man treat her poorly over

999
00:44:58,200 --> 00:45:00,719
Speaker 3: and over again. So am I I the a hole

1000
00:45:00,760 --> 00:45:03,440
Speaker 3: for telling her it won't work out the way that

1001
00:45:03,480 --> 00:45:06,200
Speaker 3: she wants it to and acting like she's just a roommate.

1002
00:45:06,640 --> 00:45:10,160
Speaker 3: Any advice on the situation would be greatly appreciated, And

1003
00:45:10,360 --> 00:45:13,239
Speaker 3: by the way, I would greatly appreciate it if you

1004
00:45:13,400 --> 00:45:18,200
Speaker 3: join us when we go live every weekday on YouTube, Facebook,

1005
00:45:18,360 --> 00:45:22,479
Speaker 3: and Twitch and TikTok at three pm PST. Just tap

1006
00:45:22,520 --> 00:45:25,120
Speaker 3: our profile and we might even be live right now.

1007
00:45:25,640 --> 00:45:29,479
Speaker 3: Are you the A hole? Op? No? But but okay,

1008
00:45:29,480 --> 00:45:31,200
Speaker 3: well let me get you go go ahead?

1009
00:45:31,960 --> 00:45:32,760
Speaker 2: No, you go ahead.

1010
00:45:33,080 --> 00:45:35,960
Speaker 3: I was gonna say, I feel like completely icing her

1011
00:45:36,040 --> 00:45:39,360
Speaker 3: out and turning her from your sister into like a

1012
00:45:39,719 --> 00:45:42,759
Speaker 3: roommate that you don't even really want to hang out with.

1013
00:45:43,280 --> 00:45:45,360
Speaker 3: That's kind of an a hole move and it's not

1014
00:45:45,400 --> 00:45:47,440
Speaker 3: gonna help you. Yeah, the only thing that's gonna do

1015
00:45:47,560 --> 00:45:50,959
Speaker 3: is make her run faster back into this dude's arms.

1016
00:45:51,200 --> 00:45:52,960
Speaker 2: Yeah. Well, well I was gonna say. Yeah. I think

1017
00:45:53,000 --> 00:45:56,799
Speaker 2: I was gonna say no for talk like saying, hey,

1018
00:45:56,920 --> 00:45:59,040
Speaker 2: you shouldn't, you know, be doing that, you shouldn't be

1019
00:45:59,080 --> 00:46:01,120
Speaker 2: getting back together with him. But I also agree, I

1020
00:46:01,120 --> 00:46:02,840
Speaker 2: don't think you have to treat her like a roommate

1021
00:46:03,040 --> 00:46:09,080
Speaker 2: unless it's actively, like, unless she's uh, go, like pushing

1022
00:46:09,080 --> 00:46:12,359
Speaker 2: past your boundaries and bringing the guy home all the time. Yes,

1023
00:46:12,640 --> 00:46:14,319
Speaker 2: at that point, then you can be like, you know what,

1024
00:46:14,840 --> 00:46:17,800
Speaker 2: our relationship is not working. You're not you know, listening

1025
00:46:17,880 --> 00:46:19,279
Speaker 2: to me and my boundaries.

1026
00:46:20,760 --> 00:46:23,080
Speaker 3: Although you know what, now that I'm thinking about it,

1027
00:46:23,880 --> 00:46:26,160
Speaker 3: I can see why she would be that upset about

1028
00:46:26,200 --> 00:46:29,080
Speaker 3: because she I think where the core of Op's issues

1029
00:46:29,080 --> 00:46:31,680
Speaker 3: coming from is that her sister was lying to her

1030
00:46:31,760 --> 00:46:34,000
Speaker 3: about meeting up with this guy. She was saying she

1031
00:46:34,080 --> 00:46:36,759
Speaker 3: was going somewhere else. Yeah. And it's like, if you've

1032
00:46:36,760 --> 00:46:38,920
Speaker 3: ever helped like a friend like through like a toxic

1033
00:46:39,120 --> 00:46:42,960
Speaker 3: like situation like this, yeah, it can get really frustrating

1034
00:46:42,960 --> 00:46:43,480
Speaker 3: when it's like.

1035
00:46:43,440 --> 00:46:46,320
Speaker 2: I have been in situations where you're like, stop doing that,

1036
00:46:47,400 --> 00:46:48,919
Speaker 2: iying about it.

1037
00:46:48,920 --> 00:46:51,560
Speaker 3: It's like, yeah, I can't deal with this anymore.

1038
00:46:51,680 --> 00:46:53,840
Speaker 2: Yeah, but it's like you can.

1039
00:46:54,000 --> 00:46:55,520
Speaker 3: So I can get being that upset about it. But

1040
00:46:55,560 --> 00:46:58,400
Speaker 3: at the same time, from my point of view, my

1041
00:46:58,480 --> 00:47:00,840
Speaker 3: perspective is only with friends because I'm have any siblings,

1042
00:47:00,920 --> 00:47:03,759
Speaker 3: So I just can't imagine like fully icing out your

1043
00:47:03,800 --> 00:47:08,200
Speaker 3: sister in this moment when clearly that's going to accelerate

1044
00:47:08,280 --> 00:47:11,000
Speaker 3: the issue that she's having. I think it's pretty clear.

1045
00:47:11,080 --> 00:47:13,279
Speaker 2: I don't think I would ever ice my sibling out

1046
00:47:13,320 --> 00:47:16,520
Speaker 2: for this behavior. But I also, like, as you kind

1047
00:47:16,520 --> 00:47:19,080
Speaker 2: of experienced, I also have friends where I've had to

1048
00:47:19,320 --> 00:47:22,960
Speaker 2: go through this constant like don't do that. Maybe we

1049
00:47:23,000 --> 00:47:25,839
Speaker 2: should not, you know, maybe we should move on from

1050
00:47:25,880 --> 00:47:29,600
Speaker 2: that person. But I don't think I would ice them out.

1051
00:47:30,560 --> 00:47:33,279
Speaker 2: But I also think there's only so much you can

1052
00:47:33,719 --> 00:47:37,239
Speaker 2: do to help them, and at a certain point it

1053
00:47:37,680 --> 00:47:39,120
Speaker 2: becomes exhausting on your end.

1054
00:47:40,120 --> 00:47:42,680
Speaker 3: I think maybe should from having a conversation of position

1055
00:47:42,800 --> 00:47:44,120
Speaker 3: to a passive one would be good.

1056
00:47:44,200 --> 00:47:46,719
Speaker 2: Yes, I think it's like, Okay, you know what, I

1057
00:47:46,760 --> 00:47:48,640
Speaker 2: can't help you. I can't give you advice if you're

1058
00:47:48,640 --> 00:47:52,200
Speaker 2: not going to take it. We're still sisters, but I

1059
00:47:52,239 --> 00:47:54,279
Speaker 2: you know, please don't come to me anymore about this

1060
00:47:54,480 --> 00:47:57,040
Speaker 2: because you're not listening to man exactly. I think that

1061
00:47:57,080 --> 00:47:59,759
Speaker 2: conversation could be had where you express your boundaries and

1062
00:47:59,760 --> 00:48:05,799
Speaker 2: say you're not helping yourself. But I think unless she

1063
00:48:06,000 --> 00:48:10,880
Speaker 2: was bringing the person home and actively affecting your life,

1064
00:48:10,880 --> 00:48:14,359
Speaker 2: and you know that would be the only case where

1065
00:48:14,400 --> 00:48:16,239
Speaker 2: I think like literally icing out.

1066
00:48:16,719 --> 00:48:19,040
Speaker 3: So you're on the right track. Ope, you're a little stinky,

1067
00:48:19,920 --> 00:48:21,200
Speaker 3: just step far.

1068
00:48:21,520 --> 00:48:25,000
Speaker 2: Yeah, you're just stepped too far, too much. So let's see.

1069
00:48:25,040 --> 00:48:27,520
Speaker 3: Let's see how the story ends, so give it edit.

1070
00:48:27,719 --> 00:48:27,839
Speaker 1: Uh.

1071
00:48:28,000 --> 00:48:32,239
Speaker 3: We decided to rent a place together where they're living now.

1072
00:48:32,239 --> 00:48:35,400
Speaker 3: I suppose I twenty five female, just finished grad school

1073
00:48:35,600 --> 00:48:39,280
Speaker 3: and was previously living at home to avoid student loans.

1074
00:48:39,880 --> 00:48:42,240
Speaker 3: Her name and mine are on a year long lease.

1075
00:48:42,480 --> 00:48:44,600
Speaker 3: Kelsey told my dad that she was talking to her

1076
00:48:44,600 --> 00:48:49,840
Speaker 3: ex again before anyone else, and he told her that

1077
00:48:49,920 --> 00:48:52,440
Speaker 3: she better not tell our ex where we were moving.

1078
00:48:53,160 --> 00:48:55,400
Speaker 3: I had bought security cameras for the house when we

1079
00:48:55,440 --> 00:48:57,759
Speaker 3: first moved in, mainly to make sure the dogs didn't

1080
00:48:57,800 --> 00:49:01,080
Speaker 3: tear up stuff and for security purposes. Kelsey told me

1081
00:49:01,200 --> 00:49:03,000
Speaker 3: it was dumb to spend my money on them, and

1082
00:49:03,239 --> 00:49:05,480
Speaker 3: kind of threw a hissy fit. A few nights later,

1083
00:49:05,560 --> 00:49:08,200
Speaker 3: she asked for access to the cameras to watch quote

1084
00:49:08,239 --> 00:49:11,200
Speaker 3: the funny dog videos, and I brushed her off because

1085
00:49:11,239 --> 00:49:13,560
Speaker 3: she was being sketchy about it. She never asked about

1086
00:49:13,560 --> 00:49:16,280
Speaker 3: them again, and some have speculated that the ex lost

1087
00:49:16,320 --> 00:49:19,239
Speaker 3: his job, but according to Kelsey, he was just moved

1088
00:49:19,280 --> 00:49:21,520
Speaker 3: to a different part of the company. He worked in

1089
00:49:21,520 --> 00:49:23,839
Speaker 3: the same department as the boss's daughter, and that's how

1090
00:49:23,880 --> 00:49:25,799
Speaker 3: they met. I don't know if he will stay at

1091
00:49:25,840 --> 00:49:28,600
Speaker 3: that job because he's had around five different ones while

1092
00:49:28,640 --> 00:49:31,760
Speaker 3: he was with Kelsey. He's currently staying with a friend.

1093
00:49:32,760 --> 00:49:36,520
Speaker 3: So and that is the end of that story.

1094
00:49:36,640 --> 00:49:39,680
Speaker 2: Dang, I got roped into cooking for my family and

1095
00:49:39,719 --> 00:49:42,799
Speaker 2: now my sister and I are fighting. English is not

1096
00:49:42,960 --> 00:49:46,160
Speaker 2: my first language, and this is what it translated. This

1097
00:49:46,200 --> 00:49:49,400
Speaker 2: is what was translated using AI. Also, this is my

1098
00:49:49,440 --> 00:49:51,920
Speaker 2: friend's story and she needs some outside perspective, but I

1099
00:49:51,960 --> 00:49:54,960
Speaker 2: will be telling it in first person to reproduce confusion

1100
00:49:54,960 --> 00:49:57,719
Speaker 2: and now hear some context. By the way, this comes

1101
00:49:57,719 --> 00:50:00,840
Speaker 2: from Least Clue seventy sixty eight on the Okay Storytime

1102
00:50:00,920 --> 00:50:04,560
Speaker 2: Separate It. So I come from a big family. I

1103
00:50:04,600 --> 00:50:07,720
Speaker 2: live with my dad sixty one male, step mom fifty

1104
00:50:07,760 --> 00:50:12,120
Speaker 2: two female, sister twenty nine female, half brother twelve male,

1105
00:50:12,719 --> 00:50:18,399
Speaker 2: and half sister fifteen female. My older brother thirty two male,

1106
00:50:18,560 --> 00:50:20,839
Speaker 2: moved out, so it's just me and the rest of them.

1107
00:50:21,440 --> 00:50:26,760
Speaker 2: I'm twenty five female. Okay, so we have dad, step mom, sister,

1108
00:50:26,880 --> 00:50:30,040
Speaker 2: half brother, half sister. So this all started on a

1109
00:50:30,120 --> 00:50:34,839
Speaker 2: particularly frustrating Thursday. I had planned to hang out with

1110
00:50:34,880 --> 00:50:37,280
Speaker 2: my brother and his girlfriend, but due to some family

1111
00:50:37,400 --> 00:50:41,040
Speaker 2: drama involving my dad and brother think court issues and

1112
00:50:41,080 --> 00:50:44,560
Speaker 2: all that mess good duty, I was told to stay home.

1113
00:50:44,800 --> 00:50:47,960
Speaker 2: My dad wanted me to focus on studying instead. I

1114
00:50:48,080 --> 00:50:51,480
Speaker 2: understand why my dad wanted me to stay, so I obliged.

1115
00:50:51,840 --> 00:50:53,360
Speaker 2: Most of the day I was cooped up in my

1116
00:50:53,440 --> 00:50:55,480
Speaker 2: room while my dad popped in and out to check

1117
00:50:55,520 --> 00:51:00,160
Speaker 2: on me. Then came the moment that set everything off.

1118
00:51:00,200 --> 00:51:02,400
Speaker 2: My dad asked me to blend a box of tomatoes

1119
00:51:02,400 --> 00:51:05,200
Speaker 2: in the kitchen to prevent them from spoiling. My stepmom

1120
00:51:05,280 --> 00:51:07,680
Speaker 2: jokingly suggested I cook something while I was at it.

1121
00:51:08,160 --> 00:51:12,280
Speaker 2: My jokingly that you mentioned making Joloff rice, but somehow

1122
00:51:12,360 --> 00:51:15,399
Speaker 2: it turned into a serious task. I figured it might

1123
00:51:15,400 --> 00:51:17,360
Speaker 2: as well. I might as well learn how to cook,

1124
00:51:17,680 --> 00:51:21,760
Speaker 2: so after taking a shower, I headed downstairs to start prepping. However,

1125
00:51:22,120 --> 00:51:26,040
Speaker 2: I underestimated how challenging cooking could be. This is so

1126
00:51:26,239 --> 00:51:29,440
Speaker 2: great story is really funny. Something that's when things took

1127
00:51:29,480 --> 00:51:32,160
Speaker 2: a turn with my sister while cooking, and my sister

1128
00:51:32,200 --> 00:51:34,520
Speaker 2: came downstairs and touched the pot I was using for

1129
00:51:34,560 --> 00:51:38,279
Speaker 2: the meat. Already stressed from trying to follow YouTube cooking tutorials,

1130
00:51:38,400 --> 00:51:41,560
Speaker 2: this upset me because the video's emphasized not to touch

1131
00:51:41,600 --> 00:51:42,960
Speaker 2: the pot or open the lid.

1132
00:51:43,560 --> 00:51:46,000
Speaker 3: Oh wait did she open the later? Did she just

1133
00:51:46,040 --> 00:51:46,880
Speaker 3: touch the pot?

1134
00:51:46,960 --> 00:51:49,359
Speaker 2: When she did, I snapped and told her not to

1135
00:51:49,360 --> 00:51:53,040
Speaker 2: touch it again. Her response was defiant, I've touched it.

1136
00:51:53,680 --> 00:51:57,080
Speaker 2: What are you gonna do? Who know? Oh no, here

1137
00:51:57,120 --> 00:52:03,320
Speaker 2: we go, sy, I pushed her. Honestly, I was angry

1138
00:52:03,360 --> 00:52:05,800
Speaker 2: already and her touching the pot didn't make it better.

1139
00:52:06,320 --> 00:52:10,600
Speaker 2: This escalated quickly into an argument about respect and sibling dynamics.

1140
00:52:11,040 --> 00:52:14,160
Speaker 2: She accused me laughing at her, which confused me because

1141
00:52:14,200 --> 00:52:17,280
Speaker 2: I was far from amused. I was stressed about cooking

1142
00:52:17,440 --> 00:52:20,560
Speaker 2: when I had no idea how to do it. Despite

1143
00:52:20,600 --> 00:52:23,480
Speaker 2: trying to stay silent, we ended up yelling at each other,

1144
00:52:23,719 --> 00:52:27,120
Speaker 2: despite my efforts to stay quiet and just cook. It

1145
00:52:27,200 --> 00:52:30,640
Speaker 2: felt like all that pent up frustration exploded right there

1146
00:52:30,680 --> 00:52:33,640
Speaker 2: in the kitchen. We eventually went silent and just ended

1147
00:52:33,719 --> 00:52:39,439
Speaker 2: up watching videos on our fer. A couple minutes later,

1148
00:52:39,600 --> 00:52:42,040
Speaker 2: my dad walked in and asked about how the rice

1149
00:52:42,200 --> 00:52:45,120
Speaker 2: was coming along. He then turned to my sister and

1150
00:52:45,160 --> 00:52:49,000
Speaker 2: asked what had happened. Apparently, my sister looked visibly angry,

1151
00:52:49,040 --> 00:52:51,400
Speaker 2: while I didn't. Obviously, I'm not gonna be mad and

1152
00:52:51,440 --> 00:52:56,560
Speaker 2: talk to my dad. My dad poor because he hasn't

1153
00:52:56,600 --> 00:52:59,799
Speaker 2: done anything to me. She started talking loudly about how

1154
00:52:59,840 --> 00:53:02,600
Speaker 2: I been disrespectful and how she didn't appreciate being pushed

1155
00:53:02,600 --> 00:53:05,760
Speaker 2: away from the pot. Despite my efforts to stay quiet

1156
00:53:05,800 --> 00:53:10,000
Speaker 2: and separate myself from the situation, we quickly escalated into

1157
00:53:10,160 --> 00:53:13,239
Speaker 2: yelling at each other. Needing to calm down, but still

1158
00:53:13,280 --> 00:53:15,360
Speaker 2: focused on not letting my food burn. I stayed in

1159
00:53:15,400 --> 00:53:18,360
Speaker 2: the kitchen while cutting on you as tears filled my

1160
00:53:18,440 --> 00:53:21,560
Speaker 2: eyes from pent up frustration. I cry when I'm angry.

1161
00:53:21,800 --> 00:53:24,239
Speaker 2: It's my own personal curse. I told her not to

1162
00:53:24,239 --> 00:53:26,319
Speaker 2: come near me because I was holding a knife. I

1163
00:53:26,360 --> 00:53:28,640
Speaker 2: honestly wasn't meant as a threat. It was just a

1164
00:53:28,719 --> 00:53:31,400
Speaker 2: statement of fact. But looking back, I realized that my

1165
00:53:31,480 --> 00:53:33,719
Speaker 2: tone might have sounded a threat. In an attempt to

1166
00:53:33,719 --> 00:53:36,360
Speaker 2: defend myself further, I made another comment, you want me

1167
00:53:36,440 --> 00:53:39,120
Speaker 2: to make your hair right? This wasn't meant as an

1168
00:53:39,120 --> 00:53:41,160
Speaker 2: attack either. I was just pointing out how she could

1169
00:53:41,160 --> 00:53:43,719
Speaker 2: treat me poorly yet still expect help from me. Later,

1170
00:53:44,480 --> 00:53:46,759
Speaker 2: she had stayed up l late doing my hair just

1171
00:53:46,800 --> 00:53:49,799
Speaker 2: the night before, which I genuinely appreciated, but apparently I

1172
00:53:49,920 --> 00:53:52,840
Speaker 2: complained what I did her hair. I honestly had no

1173
00:53:52,920 --> 00:53:54,759
Speaker 2: idea that I did this. She said it made her

1174
00:53:54,800 --> 00:53:57,920
Speaker 2: angry and that I was ungrateful. I wasn't, but I

1175
00:53:57,960 --> 00:54:01,279
Speaker 2: guess everyone is entitled to their own a bit. The

1176
00:54:01,440 --> 00:54:04,840
Speaker 2: argument escalated even more when I threatened to damage her car,

1177
00:54:05,280 --> 00:54:08,600
Speaker 2: not seriously, it was just an empty threat out of

1178
00:54:08,600 --> 00:54:11,839
Speaker 2: frustration that slipped out during a heated exchange. We were

1179
00:54:11,840 --> 00:54:14,319
Speaker 2: both saying hurtful things. At this point, I brought up

1180
00:54:14,360 --> 00:54:17,240
Speaker 2: how she often borrows money from me and called her broke.

1181
00:54:17,320 --> 00:54:19,960
Speaker 2: She retaliated by bringing up my GPA, as if that

1182
00:54:20,120 --> 00:54:23,480
Speaker 2: somehow jestified her actions. At one point during this we

1183
00:54:23,600 --> 00:54:27,240
Speaker 2: both ended up holding knives, not as an actual threat,

1184
00:54:27,280 --> 00:54:29,560
Speaker 2: but more as an unfortunate circumstance of being in the

1185
00:54:29,640 --> 00:54:32,720
Speaker 2: kitchen while arguing. In an attempt to diffuse things further,

1186
00:54:32,840 --> 00:54:35,600
Speaker 2: I handed mine over to my stepmom while she still

1187
00:54:35,640 --> 00:54:38,080
Speaker 2: held hers tightly. That's when things took a turn for

1188
00:54:38,120 --> 00:54:40,360
Speaker 2: the worse. I grabbed her hand and threw the knife

1189
00:54:40,360 --> 00:54:42,680
Speaker 2: on the floor, and in a moment of anger and frustration,

1190
00:54:42,920 --> 00:54:45,040
Speaker 2: she bit down on one of my corn rows, hard

1191
00:54:45,120 --> 00:54:47,719
Speaker 2: enough that it hurt like hell I had stooped. I

1192
00:54:47,760 --> 00:54:50,440
Speaker 2: had stupid extensions attached to it, so it seemed more

1193
00:54:50,440 --> 00:54:52,719
Speaker 2: like a half up, half down cornrow style with a

1194
00:54:52,719 --> 00:54:56,040
Speaker 2: little bit of hair left out. In retaliation. Still caught

1195
00:54:56,120 --> 00:54:58,439
Speaker 2: up in the heat of the moment, I grabbed her hair,

1196
00:54:58,640 --> 00:55:01,240
Speaker 2: not sure if this matters, but cornrows two just without

1197
00:55:01,239 --> 00:55:04,480
Speaker 2: the extension, and pulled hard without thinking about what might

1198
00:55:04,520 --> 00:55:09,120
Speaker 2: happen next. It wasn't until afterward that I realized I'd

1199
00:55:09,200 --> 00:55:11,879
Speaker 2: unknowingly left her with a bald spot from where I'd

1200
00:55:11,960 --> 00:55:15,680
Speaker 2: yanked her hair so forcefully. I don't I didn't find

1201
00:55:15,719 --> 00:55:18,719
Speaker 2: out until about thirty minutes later. She threatened again to

1202
00:55:18,760 --> 00:55:21,040
Speaker 2: cut off my hair and retaliation, since she had made

1203
00:55:21,120 --> 00:55:23,800
Speaker 2: my hair and I hadn't made hers yet. At this point,

1204
00:55:23,840 --> 00:55:26,359
Speaker 2: realizing how out of control things had gotten, I caught

1205
00:55:26,440 --> 00:55:31,000
Speaker 2: myself yelling at my dad. I immediately apologized. When you

1206
00:55:31,080 --> 00:55:33,960
Speaker 2: realize this, it made me stop talking entirely because I

1207
00:55:34,040 --> 00:55:36,799
Speaker 2: noticed that I was yelling at everyone and needed to

1208
00:55:36,880 --> 00:55:38,480
Speaker 2: regain control over my anger.

1209
00:55:38,560 --> 00:55:41,239
Speaker 3: I'm sorry, yelling at your dad was the moment you.

1210
00:55:41,239 --> 00:55:46,799
Speaker 2: Realized to fall on a minute, and not the knife.

1211
00:55:46,480 --> 00:55:48,919
Speaker 3: Fight where you had to give the knife this step mom,

1212
00:55:49,080 --> 00:55:51,239
Speaker 3: not when you were biting each other's hair off.

1213
00:55:51,280 --> 00:55:54,720
Speaker 2: I think this is funny because this all started again.

1214
00:55:54,840 --> 00:55:57,400
Speaker 2: Opie was just trying to make some breaks. Yeah, just

1215
00:55:57,440 --> 00:56:00,840
Speaker 2: trying to be like, what imagine if I made literally

1216
00:56:01,040 --> 00:56:03,160
Speaker 2: never go into the kitchen when Opie's in the kitchen.

1217
00:56:03,200 --> 00:56:05,759
Speaker 2: I guess that's the lesson, and Honeybee says, and how

1218
00:56:05,800 --> 00:56:08,239
Speaker 2: old are these children? Twenty five and twenty nine?

1219
00:56:08,520 --> 00:56:11,200
Speaker 3: Yeah, twenty five and yeah, twenty nine.

1220
00:56:11,400 --> 00:56:13,919
Speaker 2: My sister still kept talking, but I kept quiet because

1221
00:56:13,960 --> 00:56:17,320
Speaker 2: I really didn't want to keep going. Eventually, my stepmom

1222
00:56:17,360 --> 00:56:20,000
Speaker 2: took me aside on the stairwell for a talk about

1223
00:56:20,080 --> 00:56:23,879
Speaker 2: after everything calmed down slightly. She emphasized that since I'm

1224
00:56:23,880 --> 00:56:26,920
Speaker 2: the younger sister, I shouldn't disrespect my older sister like that.

1225
00:56:27,400 --> 00:56:29,799
Speaker 2: Her words stung because they made me feel like no

1226
00:56:29,800 --> 00:56:32,880
Speaker 2: one really cared about me, and all everyone wanted to

1227
00:56:32,920 --> 00:56:36,479
Speaker 2: do was console my sister. I still felt guilty about

1228
00:56:36,520 --> 00:56:39,719
Speaker 2: everything that had happened, and I mentioned that I would apologize,

1229
00:56:39,840 --> 00:56:43,759
Speaker 2: but I was advised not to apologize that day Thursday.

1230
00:56:44,080 --> 00:56:46,560
Speaker 2: This is important. I decided it would be better for

1231
00:56:46,600 --> 00:56:48,960
Speaker 2: both of us if we cooled off first before addressing

1232
00:56:48,960 --> 00:56:52,759
Speaker 2: everything again. I finished cooking in silence and went to bed,

1233
00:56:52,960 --> 00:56:57,000
Speaker 2: still feeling tense. The next day, Friday, despite intending to

1234
00:56:57,040 --> 00:56:59,439
Speaker 2: braid her hair as usual, as something we often did,

1235
00:56:59,560 --> 00:57:02,560
Speaker 2: I decided i'd against it given all the tension between us.

1236
00:57:03,000 --> 00:57:05,800
Speaker 2: Planning to apologize later when she calmed down seemed wise

1237
00:57:05,840 --> 00:57:09,560
Speaker 2: at first, However, this only backfired as she grew angrier

1238
00:57:09,760 --> 00:57:12,279
Speaker 2: throughout the day. While things were still tense at home,

1239
00:57:12,480 --> 00:57:14,279
Speaker 2: my mom called me out of nowhere. She asked how

1240
00:57:14,280 --> 00:57:16,840
Speaker 2: things were going and if I'd talked to my sister yet.

1241
00:57:17,160 --> 00:57:19,200
Speaker 2: When I explain what happened during her fight and how

1242
00:57:19,200 --> 00:57:20,840
Speaker 2: things had been since then, she told me that I

1243
00:57:20,840 --> 00:57:24,160
Speaker 2: should apologize, but not right away. What is that? Why

1244
00:57:24,200 --> 00:57:27,479
Speaker 2: is everyone waiting? She suggested, waiting until everyone had calmed

1245
00:57:27,520 --> 00:57:30,000
Speaker 2: down a bit more before trying to talk things through

1246
00:57:30,160 --> 00:57:33,240
Speaker 2: with my sister. I thought this made sense, since emotions

1247
00:57:33,280 --> 00:57:36,040
Speaker 2: were still running high after everything that had happened just yesterday,

1248
00:57:36,080 --> 00:57:40,040
Speaker 2: and I decided I would talk. I would talk to

1249
00:57:40,040 --> 00:57:43,040
Speaker 2: her tomorrow, which would have been Saturday. But around eight

1250
00:57:43,040 --> 00:57:45,880
Speaker 2: pm that evening, she stormed into my room, yelling and

1251
00:57:45,920 --> 00:57:48,760
Speaker 2: showing me a picture of her hair. It was bad.

1252
00:57:49,280 --> 00:57:51,720
Speaker 2: I had no idea it was that bad, and stating

1253
00:57:51,720 --> 00:57:54,040
Speaker 2: that she'd cut my hair and declared that we were

1254
00:57:54,080 --> 00:57:58,040
Speaker 2: no longer sisters. I was about to apologize, but decided

1255
00:57:58,080 --> 00:58:00,160
Speaker 2: against it, as I was told to stay quiet and

1256
00:58:00,200 --> 00:58:02,800
Speaker 2: apologize when she calms down. I came to the conclusion

1257
00:58:02,800 --> 00:58:05,920
Speaker 2: that any form of speech for me would escalate escalate

1258
00:58:06,000 --> 00:58:08,880
Speaker 2: things further, so I stayed quiet and allowed her to

1259
00:58:08,960 --> 00:58:12,040
Speaker 2: yell before she stormed out of my room. Eventually, after

1260
00:58:12,080 --> 00:58:15,880
Speaker 2: some time passed, maybe three to five minutes, my stepmom

1261
00:58:15,960 --> 00:58:18,720
Speaker 2: suggested it might be a good time for me to apologize,

1262
00:58:18,960 --> 00:58:22,480
Speaker 2: contrary to previous advice that my dad, mom and stepmom

1263
00:58:22,840 --> 00:58:26,080
Speaker 2: had given about leaving things alone for now, so I

1264
00:58:26,120 --> 00:58:29,080
Speaker 2: decided to go downstairs, intending to apologize for everything to

1265
00:58:29,080 --> 00:58:32,120
Speaker 2: happen between us earlier. She was talking to her dad

1266
00:58:32,160 --> 00:58:34,400
Speaker 2: when I got downstairs, so I waited till they were

1267
00:58:34,480 --> 00:58:37,520
Speaker 2: done before I approached her with an apology. Despite her

1268
00:58:37,560 --> 00:58:40,880
Speaker 2: anger and yelling at me, still, I remained calm and

1269
00:58:41,000 --> 00:58:44,560
Speaker 2: kept apologizing. I basically stood there and said sorry over

1270
00:58:44,600 --> 00:58:48,040
Speaker 2: and over again while she yelled at me. After about

1271
00:58:48,040 --> 00:58:50,120
Speaker 2: two minutes of this, my dad tells me to leave,

1272
00:58:50,240 --> 00:58:52,520
Speaker 2: so I go back upstairs and decide to send the

1273
00:58:52,560 --> 00:58:55,720
Speaker 2: message that had already typed up. Here's the text that

1274
00:58:55,800 --> 00:58:56,400
Speaker 2: I sent her.

1275
00:58:56,800 --> 00:58:58,760
Speaker 3: Up, so you should have just texted her earlier.

1276
00:58:58,880 --> 00:59:01,920
Speaker 2: Send it sorry about everything that happened. I let my

1277
00:59:01,960 --> 00:59:04,200
Speaker 2: stress about cooking and not being able to understand the

1278
00:59:04,240 --> 00:59:06,920
Speaker 2: YouTube videos get to me, and I shouldn't have taken

1279
00:59:06,920 --> 00:59:08,720
Speaker 2: it out on you. I shouldn't have acted like that

1280
00:59:08,760 --> 00:59:11,320
Speaker 2: when you touched the pot. I was just trying to

1281
00:59:11,360 --> 00:59:13,800
Speaker 2: follow what these cooking videos said, and I was angry

1282
00:59:13,840 --> 00:59:16,440
Speaker 2: that you touched the pot. I didn't even realize how

1283
00:59:16,480 --> 00:59:19,560
Speaker 2: far things had gotten until it was too late. And

1284
00:59:19,600 --> 00:59:22,360
Speaker 2: then when you started yelling about disrespect and me laughing

1285
00:59:22,360 --> 00:59:25,479
Speaker 2: at you, which honestly I wasn't, I didn't handle it well.

1286
00:59:25,680 --> 00:59:28,280
Speaker 2: I shut down and decided that ignoring you instead of

1287
00:59:28,280 --> 00:59:30,240
Speaker 2: fighting and trying to talk it out would be better.

1288
00:59:30,960 --> 00:59:32,920
Speaker 2: I shouldn't have pulled your hair, but I only did

1289
00:59:32,920 --> 00:59:34,720
Speaker 2: that because you were biting my hair, and I know

1290
00:59:34,800 --> 00:59:37,000
Speaker 2: that was way out of line, and I really am

1291
00:59:37,040 --> 00:59:39,800
Speaker 2: sorry for that. I didn't know how much damage I

1292
00:59:39,800 --> 00:59:43,040
Speaker 2: did until you showed me this evening. I also shouldn't

1293
00:59:43,080 --> 00:59:45,120
Speaker 2: have brought up money or any of the things I said.

1294
00:59:45,240 --> 00:59:49,200
Speaker 2: It was petty and hurtful, and I regret saying it.

1295
00:59:49,520 --> 00:59:51,960
Speaker 2: I was just trying to defend myself, and I'm sorry

1296
00:59:51,960 --> 00:59:54,600
Speaker 2: for that. I also shouldn't have threatened to do anything

1297
00:59:54,600 --> 00:59:57,560
Speaker 2: to your car either. That was just meaning dramatic and stupid.

1298
00:59:57,800 --> 00:59:59,960
Speaker 2: I appreciate everything you do for me, and you stay

1299
01:00:00,120 --> 01:00:02,560
Speaker 2: awake to do my hair. I shouldn't have acted like

1300
01:00:02,640 --> 01:00:04,440
Speaker 2: I was too good to help you out, or that

1301
01:00:04,480 --> 01:00:06,800
Speaker 2: I wasn't going to do your hair. I actually was,

1302
01:00:07,440 --> 01:00:10,000
Speaker 2: and at that time saying that just felt right. I

1303
01:00:10,040 --> 01:00:13,120
Speaker 2: realized I was being unfair, and I'm sorry. By the way,

1304
01:00:14,320 --> 01:00:17,160
Speaker 2: we would never be sorry. If you joined us live

1305
01:00:17,280 --> 01:00:20,920
Speaker 2: every week to three pmpst on YouTube, Facebook, TikTok, and Twitch,

1306
01:00:21,320 --> 01:00:22,600
Speaker 2: just top your profile.

1307
01:00:22,600 --> 01:00:25,320
Speaker 3: You will be sorry. We could be live right now.

1308
01:00:25,560 --> 01:00:32,400
Speaker 2: And there is a little bit more, but uh.

1309
01:00:30,160 --> 01:00:34,360
Speaker 3: This is just like a the snowball just like rolled

1310
01:00:34,600 --> 01:00:35,880
Speaker 3: out of control.

1311
01:00:35,640 --> 01:00:37,400
Speaker 2: And now there's like rocks in the snowball.

1312
01:00:37,680 --> 01:00:40,880
Speaker 3: Yeah, and it's icy and it was the size of

1313
01:00:40,960 --> 01:00:44,120
Speaker 3: a suv and by the time it got out of

1314
01:00:44,200 --> 01:00:47,720
Speaker 3: the bottom of it done, they're holding knives, they're biting

1315
01:00:47,760 --> 01:00:50,360
Speaker 3: corn rows. There's knives in the snowball too. H Yeah,

1316
01:00:50,400 --> 01:00:53,520
Speaker 3: it's like I think that I still can't get over that.

1317
01:00:53,520 --> 01:00:55,480
Speaker 3: That was Like it was like when I when I

1318
01:00:55,600 --> 01:00:57,280
Speaker 3: yelled at my dad for no reason. That's when I

1319
01:00:57,320 --> 01:01:00,880
Speaker 3: realized it was too far. It wasn't when you were

1320
01:01:00,080 --> 01:01:04,240
Speaker 3: at each other, going at each other with knives.

1321
01:01:03,920 --> 01:01:06,160
Speaker 2: Biting each other's hair.

1322
01:01:06,320 --> 01:01:09,000
Speaker 3: Second time the fight started after you guys backed off

1323
01:01:09,040 --> 01:01:10,160
Speaker 3: and then started it again.

1324
01:01:10,480 --> 01:01:12,800
Speaker 2: Yeah, maybe maybe, Yeah.

1325
01:01:12,720 --> 01:01:15,040
Speaker 3: This was I think this is a great example of

1326
01:01:15,120 --> 01:01:19,040
Speaker 3: like again, where it's like they just kept going low. Yes,

1327
01:01:19,200 --> 01:01:21,320
Speaker 3: someone just needs to go high one time and just

1328
01:01:21,360 --> 01:01:22,080
Speaker 3: be like, I don't care.

1329
01:01:22,480 --> 01:01:24,680
Speaker 2: A story of sisters going away too low.

1330
01:01:25,160 --> 01:01:27,320
Speaker 3: I don't care. What are you gonna do about it? Nothing,

1331
01:01:27,360 --> 01:01:30,280
Speaker 3: because I don't care. Boom. The entire fight is diffuse,

1332
01:01:30,280 --> 01:01:33,200
Speaker 3: It doesn't even happen diffused. It's yeah, I'm not gonna

1333
01:01:33,240 --> 01:01:35,480
Speaker 3: do anyth about it because I'm too busy cooking done.

1334
01:01:36,200 --> 01:01:41,040
Speaker 3: But just if you ever find yourself in this like uh,

1335
01:01:41,280 --> 01:01:43,120
Speaker 3: I'm trying to think of like It's like a critical

1336
01:01:43,200 --> 01:01:46,480
Speaker 3: mass situation where it just keeps it just keeps on going.

1337
01:01:46,480 --> 01:01:51,000
Speaker 2: This it's like arcane with the gemstones and if they like,

1338
01:01:51,240 --> 01:01:54,560
Speaker 2: if they keep hitting things and they're like getting more

1339
01:01:54,600 --> 01:01:57,920
Speaker 2: and more put powerful and stuff, and then they blow up.

1340
01:01:58,640 --> 01:02:01,000
Speaker 3: But there's a little bit left, yea, let's finish it up.

1341
01:02:01,080 --> 01:02:03,840
Speaker 2: So that's how everything unfolded over these two days up

1342
01:02:03,920 --> 01:02:07,200
Speaker 2: until now. Honestly, I'm a little conflicted because I honestly

1343
01:02:07,200 --> 01:02:09,800
Speaker 2: feel that we were both a holes for the situation,

1344
01:02:09,920 --> 01:02:12,400
Speaker 2: But reddit am I the a hole for how things

1345
01:02:12,440 --> 01:02:14,600
Speaker 2: went done? Edit to add, Okay, I'm pretty sure I

1346
01:02:14,600 --> 01:02:16,480
Speaker 2: said the age was modified, and I guess that has

1347
01:02:16,520 --> 01:02:19,800
Speaker 2: caused a bit of confusion in most places. At least,

1348
01:02:20,360 --> 01:02:24,560
Speaker 2: here are the real ages. My friend's sister is twenty

1349
01:02:24,640 --> 01:02:28,960
Speaker 2: one female, my friend is nineteen females. I didn't know

1350
01:02:29,080 --> 01:02:31,480
Speaker 2: modifying the ages that much would cause this much confusion.

1351
01:02:31,520 --> 01:02:32,040
Speaker 2: I apologize.

1352
01:02:32,160 --> 01:02:33,920
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, it's like, how are you doing this when

1353
01:02:33,960 --> 01:02:34,720
Speaker 3: you're twenty nine?

1354
01:02:35,280 --> 01:02:37,400
Speaker 2: And also they're all living together and when they're twenty

1355
01:02:37,400 --> 01:02:40,360
Speaker 2: five and twenty nine. And also I was confused about

1356
01:02:40,400 --> 01:02:42,640
Speaker 2: that because Opie kept saying, like I'm in school, I'm

1357
01:02:42,640 --> 01:02:44,760
Speaker 2: in school, and I was like, I mean, I guess

1358
01:02:44,800 --> 01:02:46,000
Speaker 2: you could be at school at twenty five.

1359
01:02:46,040 --> 01:02:48,040
Speaker 3: Oh yeah, if you're at Harvard Medical School, you'd be

1360
01:02:48,160 --> 01:02:49,760
Speaker 3: in school at twenty five. And I was like what

1361
01:02:49,960 --> 01:02:52,000
Speaker 3: I was a little bit wouldn't know anything about that drop.

1362
01:02:51,800 --> 01:02:54,320
Speaker 2: Out dup dead of all these schools. Uh yeah, so

1363
01:02:54,480 --> 01:02:58,120
Speaker 2: Opie was nineteen in the story and the sister was

1364
01:02:58,160 --> 01:02:58,640
Speaker 2: twenty one.

1365
01:02:58,720 --> 01:03:00,479
Speaker 3: Makes so much makes more sense.

1366
01:03:00,640 --> 01:03:02,320
Speaker 2: Yeah, still crazy.

1367
01:03:02,320 --> 01:03:04,360
Speaker 3: It's the tail end of when this becomes acceptable. I

1368
01:03:04,400 --> 01:03:06,920
Speaker 3: would expect that to be the last. Yeah, you better

1369
01:03:06,960 --> 01:03:10,320
Speaker 3: not do it out fight. Yeah, between the two of them. Yeah,

1370
01:03:10,400 --> 01:03:11,840
Speaker 3: but twenty five and twenty nine. I was like, this

1371
01:03:11,920 --> 01:03:12,520
Speaker 3: makes no sense.

1372
01:03:12,800 --> 01:03:13,000
Speaker 2: Yeah.

1373
01:03:13,080 --> 01:03:15,160
Speaker 3: It's also like you need to know how to cook rice?

1374
01:03:16,360 --> 01:03:21,080
Speaker 2: Yes, yeah, nineteen. I'm like, okay, okay, like you're not

1375
01:03:21,120 --> 01:03:24,240
Speaker 2: even living on your own. Yeah, this makes a little

1376
01:03:24,240 --> 01:03:24,720
Speaker 2: bit more sense.