Speaker 1: Welcome to Will You Accept This Rose? A production of
Speaker 1: I Heart Radio? Oh, oh my god, I will accept
Speaker 1: your Rose? America? Oh yow, what happened? What happened out?
Speaker 1: Oh my god? I'm welcome to a very special episode
Speaker 1: of Will You Accept This Rose. My name is Art Marine,
Speaker 1: and I am coming to you not from my bougie garage,
Speaker 1: but I am coming to you from the most amazing
Speaker 1: comedy theater on earth. We are their very first hybrid.
Speaker 1: This was supposed to just be online. And then when
Speaker 1: Biden risked his nap, he ripped off the mask and
Speaker 1: we were like, wait a minute, would our maniac fans
Speaker 1: come play with us. We're like, yeah, they would. And
Speaker 1: so first of all, we're a Dynasty typewriter. Thank you
Speaker 1: so much. Dynasty were their first hybrid. Hello to people
Speaker 1: watching at home. Shout out to people watching at home.
Speaker 1: I feel like I've been like a soda bottle that's
Speaker 1: been shook up in my house for fifteen months, and
Speaker 1: I'm like vaxed up and I'm ready to go. I
Speaker 1: got Jerry Trainer on my skirt. I got the Sentinel,
Speaker 1: excuse me, the Sentinels filming eye Carly right now. But
Speaker 1: he's really here, all right, Well, we just have to
Speaker 1: keep it moving. This is I also have to tell
Speaker 1: you because it's live streamed. You know, Normally I would
Speaker 1: play like Barracuda for people coming out, because I'm classy
Speaker 1: like that. But we have to do like royalty free music.
Speaker 1: So excuse me the production team. Excuse me that production team,
Speaker 1: stand up, waved the crowd. Katie Levine and Dr Anna
Speaker 1: Hannah Montana Banana. Dr Banana sent me a link. She's like,
Speaker 1: oh my heart has a Royalty free music library, and
Speaker 1: I thought, great, okay, cool. She didn't mention that it
Speaker 1: was like fifteen thousand of the worst songs on Earth,
Speaker 1: And so Dr Banana and I Thursday night we talked
Speaker 1: was supposed to be ten minutes, and I think it
Speaker 1: was like two and a half hours, and we clicked
Speaker 1: through every genre to pick out the worst song we
Speaker 1: could find for each person to come out and make
Speaker 1: them dance with me, because and I do dance, and
Speaker 1: I've been in my house with minton Um. So let's
Speaker 1: just bring what's you guys ready? Are you ready to
Speaker 1: start the show? Does everybody have their sheets of paper
Speaker 1: to make their draft picks and their pencils okay, great,
Speaker 1: excuse me, excuse me, any idea book? Excuse me? Okay.
Speaker 1: First up, it's the It's the woman that I started
Speaker 1: this entire thing with in her kitchen. Um. You know her.
Speaker 1: She was a writer on One Day at a Time
Speaker 1: on Netflix. Um. She has the most amazing stand up
Speaker 1: comedy album that came out like truly, it's so freaking funny.
Speaker 1: If you need a laugh, it's called Deep Dive. But
Speaker 1: most important, she is my platonic life partner. What your
Speaker 1: hands together for, Aaron? Fine? Turn it up? Damn it.
Speaker 1: I have shorts under my Jerry skirt. Aaron, this is
Speaker 1: for you. You're sitting right there. Hi, that's your seat. Yep,
Speaker 1: that's how you do it? Is it? Turn on? There?
Speaker 1: We gonna try it. Could we have kick started? Uh?
Speaker 1: Put a kick started together? Some fucking music or Sammy
Speaker 1: play again? Yeah? Turn it out? This is my block?
Speaker 1: Well you're fuck that will? Fine? You set there? Thank good?
Speaker 1: Keep it going, Sammy. Next up here we go. Are
Speaker 1: you ready? Are you ready? Okay? I fear not. I
Speaker 1: haven't loved my house in fifty months. Okay, next up?
Speaker 1: You know him as God, I'm supernatural. Uh, you know
Speaker 1: from Lucifer. You know him from his podcast Kings of Gone,
Speaker 1: but most importantly he's Bastor of the Year one Ladies
Speaker 1: and Gentlemen, Rob at last year. I Hi, Rob, that's
Speaker 1: your scene right there. Oh my god, I'm so great song, Rob,
Speaker 1: that you had a great song. Hid. Actually I have
Speaker 1: not like moved around in fifteen months. It's been a months.
Speaker 1: Been a minute, okay, but you know what, let's just
Speaker 1: keep it moving, Okay. Our next person covering to this change.
Speaker 1: He's freaking awesome. He is our newest edition to believe
Speaker 1: you E said this Rose podcast. We freaking love him.
Speaker 1: He's a writer, a comedian, and an actor. You know,
Speaker 1: I'm from comedy Bang Bang. He was also a writer
Speaker 1: on Brooklyn nine nine and he's currently a writer. I'm Keenan.
Speaker 1: Put your hands together for my Pando new friend, Carol,
Speaker 1: don't find a calture. Calture, this is happening. Yeah. I
Speaker 1: think Banna and I did pretty well dr burnetto with
Speaker 1: our songs. Yeah, except for the first one. It was great. Yeah. Whatever, Okay,
Speaker 1: keeping a movie. Oh can I interrupt for a quick tickend?
Speaker 1: It's time to meet our alcohol. The drivers here with
Speaker 1: our alcohol. Yeah, postmated alcohol tone to come in, go
Speaker 1: get the alcohol head out your block. We wrote down
Speaker 1: on the note breach it to the wine nose on
Speaker 1: the stage. It should be a secret. All these cups
Speaker 1: are empty in anticipation for now. Up next, you know
Speaker 1: this person from criminal mind surprised? You know all this
Speaker 1: person from another period? Excuse me? You might know this
Speaker 1: person has the most symmetrical face on earth. Our secretary
Speaker 1: of State, my best friend, ladies and generant page at Preston.
Speaker 1: She's got a tip to the line. Yeah, oh yeah,
Speaker 1: you tip that came down. You took a pig time
Speaker 1: get it both pink does? She makes she's seven a blog?
Speaker 1: Excuse me? Who's got a bird? Shaff? Everybody but Herod?
Speaker 1: What them? Where's your merchard? That's how you dare with? Okay? Great,
Speaker 1: keep a casual, keep it moving, exhausted, Last up? First,
Speaker 1: did you like? Did you like your song? Thank you?
Speaker 1: This is what I do every Friday at five in
Speaker 1: my house. The pandemic has been great for me. I
Speaker 1: just do it alone with mitten to me out. Okay,
Speaker 1: moving along? Are you ready for your final Bachelor draft?
Speaker 1: Pick Helper? You know him as a brilliant stand up comedian.
Speaker 1: You know him as a podcast host. Uh. He hosts
Speaker 1: Doug Loves Movies. He hosts Wide World of Dougs. He
Speaker 1: hosts Getting Dug with High Excuse me, he's a Rookie
Speaker 1: of the Year. And when I think what kind of
Speaker 1: music just Doug Benson listen to driving around Los Angeles?
Speaker 1: I just know I know when you you'll think of that,
Speaker 1: I go, oh, yeah, that's gotta be Doug Benson, ladies,
Speaker 1: and I'm a duck. That's it. Blessed care comes Dug Batches,
Speaker 1: don't this is his five? This is fucking to bens?
Speaker 1: Is five? Drop that? Guys? I must be that. I
Speaker 1: didn't bother this room but me? Are you guys ready
Speaker 1: to start the draft? Pick? Bats? All? Rats? What me
Speaker 1: trying on? All right? That was a great Doug Benson song,
Speaker 1: Wasn't that so Doug Benson? Before we start, I'm gonna
Speaker 1: give out a present. Excuse me? Excuse is me boner alert?
Speaker 1: Look at who's that fucking who's that hot lady? Meet
Speaker 1: the authors? Aren't an admittance? Yeah? I made a puzzle
Speaker 1: in me and my cat recreating my eighth grade photo
Speaker 1: because I know what's up? Who flew here. Okay, oh
Speaker 1: my god, you both did. All right, you guys are
Speaker 1: getting a signed book. And but it's pluzzles. It's a pluzzle.
Speaker 1: I can't toss it. Here we go. It's a puzzle
Speaker 1: you No, you can't leave. Mostly just keep you from us.
Speaker 1: All right, here we go. Here's the name of the game.
Speaker 1: We're going as we do, We're gonna be picking. Here's
Speaker 1: the there the categories to keep note of. Okay, top
Speaker 1: three in order, who's gonna win? Who are the two
Speaker 1: that are getting boned in a hot tub? Siwhere? And
Speaker 1: then kicked to the curb, who's gonna be the next bachelor?
Speaker 1: And it could they could you could have both that
Speaker 1: you could have the same list. I don't know you're thinking, sir.
Speaker 1: I don't know how you think, sir. Then we have
Speaker 1: um drunk on the first night, the villain, and then
Speaker 1: thirstiest of like who's just there to get Instagram followers
Speaker 1: the most? Okay, are you guys ready? Pardon? Oh, Craig Craig.
Speaker 1: All right, let's just write it in everybody writing Craig Craig. Okay, wait,
Speaker 1: Carl Rob did you hear that? Okay, so we're adding
Speaker 1: in one category. Everybody has to write it on their own.
Speaker 1: It's Craig crazy, so um into the Craig Craze is
Speaker 1: just the person who's not the villain, but it's freaking
Speaker 1: Banianna's just like full Baniana pants, who is a perfect
Speaker 1: example of Craig Craig from the Daniel Great Dan Dale Daniel,
Speaker 1: who was like Crystal Daniel. You get the gist. Okay, yes,
Speaker 1: side note. ABC could not be more delighted in the
Speaker 1: ad campaign, which I feel like they've really like cheeped
Speaker 1: out without like they gave her like two dollars and
Speaker 1: but I feel like they're so excited to have every
Speaker 1: vibrator to like see what all the buzz is about.
Speaker 1: She met, Okay, here we go. All right, so Rob
Speaker 1: you're going to start off. Here we go our first Yes,
Speaker 1: it is thank you. My thumble of wine is at
Speaker 1: my feet and my Halston glasses will be coming out.
Speaker 1: Excuse me, nan, I has to see alright, first up
Speaker 1: year old insurance right here. Okay, wait, we're gonna here
Speaker 1: comes eron right here? Okay, you want to make that
Speaker 1: full screen? Is that a thing we could do? Or
Speaker 1: is that here? All right? They thank you, Sammy as
Speaker 1: you're reading that, I'll read this. It's easy to see
Speaker 1: that Aaron is strapping young man. But don't be fooled
Speaker 1: as much more to this. California said that means the
Speaker 1: I Aaron currently works in sales, enjoys the outdoors and
Speaker 1: lifting weights. Uh he was, Yeah, he's thoughtful, sensitive, ambitious,
Speaker 1: saying then five years time, he hopes to own his
Speaker 1: own business and work for himself. But does it say
Speaker 1: what it is? Like? What is just general business? Some
Speaker 1: kind of business that does business? I's crazy, busy, I'm crazy.
Speaker 1: He's looking for a woman who's down to earth, smart, funny,
Speaker 1: just like, oh my god, excuse me. He plans to
Speaker 1: leave a legacy behind, so he needs a partner who's
Speaker 1: going to support him. I don't encourage his dreams. I
Speaker 1: don't know I could break that. Aaron says he could
Speaker 1: be acrosstinator, but right now he's done wasting his time
Speaker 1: and ready to find his wife. What is this whole
Speaker 1: stapor tooth tiger tattoo of family initials? It just says
Speaker 1: he has one tattoo to his family's initials as big
Speaker 1: as fears are rats and sabretooth tigers. Well, too bad.
Speaker 1: For him. I have a saber tooth tiger in my house.
Speaker 1: He's afraid of rats because one my nest in his hair.
Speaker 1: What do you guys, how do you guys feel about
Speaker 1: I feel like he's a contender. I feel no nobody
Speaker 1: you have a previous run in with his saber tooth tiger.
Speaker 1: Be afraid of something that's extinct? Is it extinct? We'd
Speaker 1: all be afraid. Yeah, I wouldn't actively fear of sabertooth,
Speaker 1: but I don't think i'd feel good. Like anybody that
Speaker 1: says legacy is a fucking hard pot, you know what,
Speaker 1: You're absolutely right? Like my ovaries panicked as soon as
Speaker 1: I heard I want to leave a legacy. I'm like,
Speaker 1: that's a lot of pressure, you know what I mean?
Speaker 1: Like a kid? All right, all right, but that's like
Speaker 1: four paget Are you in on Are you in on erin?
Speaker 1: I'm not sorry, We're all in on Erin. We're just
Speaker 1: not in on erin. Don't say that long. Is it
Speaker 1: possible to turn our queen arand Mike up a little bit?
Speaker 1: I need to hear this, this gal right here? Yeah,
Speaker 1: we need a refresher. It's Katie the loudest chicken the
Speaker 1: p t A yeah, like with the but she came
Speaker 1: forward and was like, hey, this is a problem and
Speaker 1: we need to figure right, do you robbed her? You
Speaker 1: called her die? Yeah, dildobey. She was she was a snitch.
Speaker 1: She was snitches get stitches, Carl, or did they get Victoria?
Speaker 1: I thought was gonna give her stitches? But she was
Speaker 1: all talking Victoria. Did you like Victoria? We'll talk about it. Okay,
Speaker 1: all right, that's a maybe, Ladies and gentlemen, Victoria everybody.
Speaker 1: And she's riding a sabertooth tiger. Okay, all right, she's
Speaker 1: been eyeing that for a long time. Carl is up
Speaker 1: with Andrew M. All right. Next up is Andrew M.
Speaker 1: That mother uh. Andrew M is a deputy district attorney,
Speaker 1: so he is also a snitch. I don't think he
Speaker 1: got vaccinated. I feel like he didn't get back. When
Speaker 1: he's not in the courtroom, you can find Andrew and
Speaker 1: coaching youth water polo or building bonfires on the beach.
Speaker 1: Fun fact. Andrew loves to play pranks like putting people
Speaker 1: in jail. Andrew loves the sample men's fragrances from magazine
Speaker 1: and serious Is that really in there. Yeah, Andrew loves woodworking.
Speaker 1: And when Andrew M graduated from college, he tebowed on
Speaker 1: stage with tebowing, I'll remember the tim tebow like praying symbol,
Speaker 1: which this dude's thirty one. So when he graduate from college,
Speaker 1: that ship wasn't cool like that. You're right, because that
Speaker 1: would have been like eight years ago. Yeah, like two
Speaker 1: thousand and left. It was kind of no no, so
Speaker 1: he so when he went to get the diploma head,
Speaker 1: I thought he was really getting hit in. Uh. Also
Speaker 1: has a fun side and a great sister humor because
Speaker 1: he's act sure, Doug, how are you feeling about Andrew M?
Speaker 1: Not great? I really feel like I need to get
Speaker 1: to know him better. I do. I don't really feel
Speaker 1: like he's showing us the real Hey, Kitty and Anna,
Speaker 1: can you just tell like does it? We'll come back
Speaker 1: to you in a second. Just like a little bit
Speaker 1: of where Katie's from. Like all I know is that
Speaker 1: she's a snitch and she has a vibrator. Okay, all right,
Speaker 1: I am next and I am reading andrew S. He's
Speaker 1: twenty six. He's a pro football player from Vienna, Austria.
Speaker 1: Excuse like, how cute my hair? Bow Is. Okay, he's
Speaker 1: from Vienna, Austria. He's truly a man of the world.
Speaker 1: He spends half the year living in Vienna, where he
Speaker 1: plays pro football. The other half he lives in Chicago,
Speaker 1: where he works as a football coach and a teacher's assistant.
Speaker 1: He says living in Europe has given an updated look
Speaker 1: on life, where people work to live instead of live
Speaker 1: to work. He can't wait to get married and have
Speaker 1: five kids one day. Okay, someday. The one thing you
Speaker 1: cannot handle is a relationship with poor communication. Uh, let's see.
Speaker 1: He loves to read nerd out over each in Rome. Uh.
Speaker 1: He loves Margarite us and he has a very close
Speaker 1: relationship with his nineties six year old grandmother. Sure seeing
Speaker 1: a few months, Grandma, I'm going on a dating show.
Speaker 1: I know you're on your live When I get out,
Speaker 1: you're on your last leg. Grandma. Well, I get to
Speaker 1: put on a Joleneck and get in the bones zone. Like.
Speaker 1: I think he's very sweet. I think the five kids
Speaker 1: thing is yeah, kids is too many. He could have
Speaker 1: said three. If you really want five, say three and
Speaker 1: then sneaking a set of twins. You do it right,
Speaker 1: That's how you do it as a twin. I don't
Speaker 1: know if that's a good thing. You're a mistake, You're
Speaker 1: a snake. Let's call get Mary Foley on the line. Mary,
Speaker 1: I need to talk to was our mistake. There's two
Speaker 1: things that bothered me about this. To talk to me?
Speaker 1: Says he's a professional football player, but in Austria. So
Speaker 1: that means either a he has decided to play American
Speaker 1: football in Europe or be he calls soccer football, which
Speaker 1: I understand that's what it is, right, very smug right football?
Speaker 1: Do you think it's U T bo l motherfucker football? Football?
Speaker 1: All right? I don't think I see my winter winter
Speaker 1: chicken dinner yet. Take it high, friend. I'm sitting next
Speaker 1: to Tim ten and we talk all the time. I'm
Speaker 1: sorry I called you a mistake. You're not Okay, Okay,
Speaker 1: you go a have it. What if we just kept
Speaker 1: getting deliveries all shot? And here comes our next bottle
Speaker 1: of what? It's a tough merlow? Okay, here we go Austin, Austin.
Speaker 1: He's cute. He's he's cute. It's cute. Oh really, State
Speaker 1: investor from Mission v A HO, I don't know about that. Um,
Speaker 1: what's a few tattoos? Bit of a dreamer? Loves his
Speaker 1: white shoes. That means he does not go out right, Um, okay,
Speaker 1: here we go. He loves to stay home with his
Speaker 1: white shoes. Okay's such a dreamer that we we're supposed
Speaker 1: to keep our white shoes white all the time with
Speaker 1: baking soda and hydrogen peroxide. You know things, you know things.
Speaker 1: I feel like you know how to do life. I've
Speaker 1: been watching a lot of d I y at home
Speaker 1: tips from Australia from a fucking serial killer's notebook. What
Speaker 1: in the fuck? Okay, so all right, here we go Austin. Um,
Speaker 1: all right, Austin has been very busy in quarantine. There's
Speaker 1: a fucking red flag right there. Um exactly. I just
Speaker 1: spread to like a low. Anybody that says they've had
Speaker 1: a positive experience, I want to fucking murder on site
Speaker 1: at right for me, I said it was great. I
Speaker 1: just read and I got to know myself better. I'm
Speaker 1: gonna fucking murder your face. Um. Not only does he
Speaker 1: work out at least six days a week, but in
Speaker 1: lone he flipped twenty properties. Oh god, do I have
Speaker 1: to read on? Uh? He's a weak. Aston says his
Speaker 1: weakness is a woman with a great smile and that
Speaker 1: he would love to find someone he can get dressed
Speaker 1: up for. And then I don't know what's happening. I'm
Speaker 1: gonna keep reading. Astin is live streaming. I'm smiling with oh. Um,
Speaker 1: Austin uh Arden is on the market for a makeout
Speaker 1: session from five to six pm, and then she's gonna
Speaker 1: wrap things up, gonna wrap it up. While Austin has
Speaker 1: dated maybe women, he says that he hasn't found a
Speaker 1: relationship is serious enough to him to consider marriage. Blah
Speaker 1: blah blah, Austin, let's just spend the day at the
Speaker 1: beach and work on his tan. Oh my god, what
Speaker 1: are you fucking? Twelve? Austin doesn't have any tattoos, but
Speaker 1: he definitely wants to get a feeld see horse on
Speaker 1: the foot. Um. Austin loves his white shoes and fears
Speaker 1: the day that someone spills Austin should never be in
Speaker 1: public quite frankly, Um, I don't know, Dr Banana Katie.
Speaker 1: Have you thought about our gentlemen so far? How do
Speaker 1: you feel about white shoe tattoo? Dreamer? Um? Is this on?
Speaker 1: I don't know, I don't know. I don't know. I
Speaker 1: can't comment on him. I think he's really hot and
Speaker 1: Instagram and he's hot on Katie's our Instagram slo, So
Speaker 1: is he the one that you were super hup? Marcas
Speaker 1: was the one that I thought was really cute and
Speaker 1: then I looked at Instagram and he's still cute. But
Speaker 1: not ask you to the thought it would be Okay,
Speaker 1: Austin's very cute on his just pictures of alright, you
Speaker 1: think do you him? Just tanning in wait to choose? Also,
Speaker 1: I found out from about Katie Okay, she is thirty
Speaker 1: years old. She's a bank marketing manager from Renton, Washington.
Speaker 1: This is about who she's going to pick, right, Duck
Speaker 1: is gonna pick? I've learned this Pacific Northwest. In the
Speaker 1: world of banking, we all can relate pretty hardcore. Look
Speaker 1: at dog. Look at dog. This is like my first
Speaker 1: literally time leaving my house. And this is so amazing
Speaker 1: that I'm not even exaggerating. I could not feel more comfortable.
Speaker 1: I felt my perfect like this is the only place
Speaker 1: I'll feel comfortable in the next six wherever, literally forever.
Speaker 1: I felt my own version of prozac and like a
Speaker 1: people experience, and then I'll just go back to my
Speaker 1: house until we do a podcast like this is the
Speaker 1: only place that I feel like I make sense. I
Speaker 1: love it, I appreciate all I Yeah, submounts, we're all
Speaker 1: going out, all right, I'm gonna not I'm gonna take
Speaker 1: Austin as a circle of him, maybe because he was
Speaker 1: hot on Instagram. Peg take it away? You're doing? Oh
Speaker 1: this guy, Brandon, he might be craigst Dlan drunk on
Speaker 1: the first Wait a minute, we're missing a guy if
Speaker 1: he had that look going into Pando. Hold on, you
Speaker 1: don't have Brandon. I have Brandon kept it all the
Speaker 1: way through this. Oh we're missing Brandon. Next guy on
Speaker 1: our list? Okay, take Katie. Okay, Katie's gonna read he's
Speaker 1: totally a no though obvious Sandon Okaya, definitely Okay, great,
Speaker 1: but here he comes Kave is this on? So? Brandon
Speaker 1: is twenty six and auto parts manager from Queens, New York.
Speaker 1: He is quirky, intelligent, and unapologetically himself. He attended Northwestern
Speaker 1: where he says he learned to outgrow behaviors that limit
Speaker 1: his progress as a person. Outgrow behaviors that limit his
Speaker 1: progress as a person. That's what I thought. He's just
Speaker 1: did outgrow the haters. He currently spends most of his
Speaker 1: weekends at home working on a new skill. He's trying
Speaker 1: to develop what cently. Language languages are a big interest
Speaker 1: of his. He's fluent in Japanese and Spanish and expanding
Speaker 1: his Korean, and he likes Korean R and B. Yeah,
Speaker 1: He says he loves to attend the occasional rave occasional
Speaker 1: rave his house like learn languages, and then once like
Speaker 1: every two months, he goause like black out crazy, and
Speaker 1: he hates and hates in all caps, exorbitantly overpriced restaurants. Okay,
Speaker 1: pass past, love a nice armb and he find finds
Speaker 1: joy hitting the open road on a motorcycle. Dude, I
Speaker 1: feel like the guys might end up liking him. I
Speaker 1: feel like he's not gonna win Katie's heart, but he
Speaker 1: might know. You're shaking your head. You don't think so,
Speaker 1: you don't think that. You don't think that the guys
Speaker 1: will be like, he's quirky, but I like them occasional race.
Speaker 1: You think thirsty hipster? Do you guys are great? Thirsty hipster?
Speaker 1: Oh my god? Being Tanna being an art and excuse it?
Speaker 1: Are you fucking kidding me? Get up here keeping your
Speaker 1: masks on at home? Are you kidding? Oh my god?
Speaker 1: Here get he's gonna I don't think as look at
Speaker 1: their past podcast mast look at oh I'm looking at
Speaker 1: home all right. Excuse me if you didn't get your
Speaker 1: march like a cute this is when you accept this rose.
Speaker 1: Excuse share it, share it? Oh my god, wow, thank
Speaker 1: you so much. You guys are talking of applause. Yeah. Wow,
Speaker 1: I'm never reading. That's so sweet. Oh my god. I
Speaker 1: never gonna leave except for an occasional rave. Literally a
Speaker 1: case dot dot dot dot dot dot dot dot dot
Speaker 1: dot job. Okay, great, Okay, who's up? Okay? Now we
Speaker 1: have Brendan twenties six firefighter trainee, Toronto, Ontario, Canada, Canada.
Speaker 1: That's good Northwest though, that's East coast. Is the type
Speaker 1: of guy who always enjoys life to the fullest. Well,
Speaker 1: he's got eat my vegetables. Really just not like, uh,
Speaker 1: I'm currently in the process of becoming a full time firefighter.
Speaker 1: Are we sure that's not Peter Faccinelli, the dad from Twilight?
Speaker 1: Thank you? I know a fac eli but see him?
Speaker 1: I am I didn't wear an I'm a Faccinelli shirt,
Speaker 1: but I almost did tonight. Okay, keep going, um. Brendan
Speaker 1: takes a lot of pride over this goal of becoming
Speaker 1: a full time firefighter and is excited to make a
Speaker 1: positive difference in his community. While Brendan's professional life is
Speaker 1: exactly where he wants it, Get there, Okay, get there,
Speaker 1: he still dreams of adding a little fire to his
Speaker 1: personal life and his partner Brendon is working for good
Speaker 1: back and forth banter, a sense of adventure on an
Speaker 1: open mind. He has no specific deal breakers, but says
Speaker 1: that he loves being clean and organized and hopes to
Speaker 1: find a woman who feels the same. That's not I think,
Speaker 1: I don't want a filthy monster, but takes it up
Speaker 1: and get clean and organized. Oh there's more. He's a
Speaker 1: straight shooter and says that nothing makes him happier than
Speaker 1: putting a smile on the face of the woman he loves. Okay.
Speaker 1: Brendon says he is in a great spot in his
Speaker 1: life to go on this journey and try and find
Speaker 1: his perfect match. I think it. Doug doesn't even sound real,
Speaker 1: all right, Doug? What do you think? What about? What
Speaker 1: about that? Brandon. He's all right, I'm getting excited about
Speaker 1: my guy. I feel like, do you guys? I feel
Speaker 1: like he could make top three? Am I right? Baby?
Speaker 1: But he might be a m there's a chance he's
Speaker 1: al do But he also could be adorable fighter. He says,
Speaker 1: they're a straight shooter. This sounds fake. He sounds like,
Speaker 1: you gotta tell me that you're telling the truth, and
Speaker 1: that means that you're not. I bet he loves fire.
Speaker 1: I love fire. I love fire. All right, Doug, you're excited,
Speaker 1: Doug as Christian Christian is a real estate Agel's cut
Speaker 1: out of Boston, Massachusetts. Christian says that he sees romance
Speaker 1: and everything. Just the other day, you fuck the fire hydrant.
Speaker 1: That's how I was smiling. I thought of that joke.
Speaker 1: I'm so excited. If that's really all I have on him, Okay, great,
Speaker 1: all right, he's a double yeah, but he's ready to go. Carl,
Speaker 1: what do you think? What do you think of Christian? Carl?
Speaker 1: I don't like his See your sweatshirt he's wearing. It's okay,
Speaker 1: all right, that's fine. I don't I'm not I'm not
Speaker 1: taking him out of the running yet, but I don't
Speaker 1: think he's gonna win. I feel like he'll he might
Speaker 1: make it to Europe, but you've never seen a real season.
Speaker 1: Carl get Ready jumped in Portugal. Christian. Yeah, that guy
Speaker 1: presents as immature to me. He followed Tom Brady to
Speaker 1: Tampa and I don't respect him. Yeah, to be like Brady.
Speaker 1: He wears uggs around the house. He's got number twelve
Speaker 1: tattooed on his as Alright, production team, you're up take it?
Speaker 1: Production team? Alright, alright are net This person is Cody? Okay, Oh,
Speaker 1: here we go. Cody is What does he do? He's
Speaker 1: a Zipper sales manager. He's twenty seven. He's from Sandy Aco.
Speaker 1: I'm sorry, what what is he? He's a Zipper sales manager.
Speaker 1: Nifer sales on sale, Zipper tonight, Honey, I'm really stuck
Speaker 1: in it. It says on the surface he's a handsome
Speaker 1: surfer with a six pack. That's really a romantic gentleman
Speaker 1: at heart. The best surfers bring beer, is what I
Speaker 1: always say. So it sounds like he likes to surf.
Speaker 1: Blah blah blah, dreams of owning his own house. At thirty,
Speaker 1: he had the same favorite TV show as Doug. Oh
Speaker 1: yeah with the Jersey shore. Wait a second, he's a
Speaker 1: he's a very proud eagle scout. He's a bit like
Speaker 1: Colton two point Oh yeah, you can't you in peak
Speaker 1: as an eagle scoun No, you can't pee. He also
Speaker 1: is looking for someone to look past his exterior and
Speaker 1: see what his insides. No problem looking past your exterior.
Speaker 1: I've ever even thought. I didn't even have the thought
Speaker 1: and not filter out Like God, I wish people would
Speaker 1: just see me from me and not just for all
Speaker 1: of this. We could just get past like this, like
Speaker 1: I just you could just pass my basic fucking whiteness
Speaker 1: and a white fucking top. Might This might be a
Speaker 1: crazy because it says when he falls, he falls hard
Speaker 1: possible crag like I. You didn't pick me for the
Speaker 1: roads we had. We had a moment, but I didn't
Speaker 1: get the I need to talk to you. Oh man,
Speaker 1: I think I like this dude. What I feel like
Speaker 1: He's going to be in the house like people ship
Speaker 1: on the Zipper game, but I'm rolling in of his
Speaker 1: own shoes on beds. I'm rolling in. He's like, Okay,
Speaker 1: he's like the person that it's like, yeah, that rich
Speaker 1: kid their dad invented like the tab that pulls like
Speaker 1: like oh funk, Like you're right, he might be the
Speaker 1: Zipper kids, all right. I hope Zipper puns a company
Speaker 1: called Zipper. I think I don't think they make zippers.
Speaker 1: Before we do, before we do a quick other round,
Speaker 1: and let's check in with the people any messages on
Speaker 1: our live stream. We're checking in with the people at
Speaker 1: home that are emailing in what's happening, what's happening at home?
Speaker 1: Because we need to know what's happening at home and
Speaker 1: loved home. I love home. I feel so weird not
Speaker 1: in my home. I've been in it for at home.
Speaker 1: Canna what's happening at home? Dr? People think that he
Speaker 1: has guard and protect your heart vibes, Yeah, okay, Carl
Speaker 1: wants upon a time there was this guy that he
Speaker 1: and he and he was like, oh God, protect coard
Speaker 1: and protect who on a chattoo like during the season.
Speaker 1: Somehow he got to go to a tattoo parlor and
Speaker 1: write an enormous tattoo with like a like a sword
Speaker 1: and all bleeding heart that said I will guard and
Speaker 1: protect your heart. And she's like, what's that he said?
Speaker 1: And he sang a song and he's like, oh, how
Speaker 1: does the song go? Ascarry song? I'm right with your
Speaker 1: horror anyway. And he got dumped on the two on
Speaker 1: one day. He got dumped on the side of a
Speaker 1: mountain on a two on one day chopper, a category chopper.
Speaker 1: How are you guys doing? Are you ready for another round?
Speaker 1: Do you think any of that first round is going
Speaker 1: to be the winner? All right? Great coming up, rob
Speaker 1: take it away, we'll clip it. We don't want to
Speaker 1: hold you hostage. We'll keep a move then, all right,
Speaker 1: let's see this guy. His name is connor By. I
Speaker 1: feel like he's gonna go far. He's in my top three.
Speaker 1: He's in my top three. He's a perfect batchelor, high
Speaker 1: for her button, but perfect for her alright, lovable for
Speaker 1: this is vibrator, alright. He's a lovable, quirky and charming
Speaker 1: eighth grade math teacher. That that'll do. He's got a
Speaker 1: degree in medical physics. Nashville que resumated includes nuclear engineer
Speaker 1: as a job title. He definitely but he definitely owns
Speaker 1: up to his nerdy side. God fund himself a woman
Speaker 1: who will share his enthusiasm and his zest for living.
Speaker 1: Every day to its fullest. His ideal partners genuine and kind,
Speaker 1: socially accepting, open minded and uh white who wants uh
Speaker 1: he wants someone who can build a family with him. Um,
Speaker 1: he could enjoy a good multilocation date with a theme. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I like it because Connor by wants to press his
Speaker 1: date with a good time. He likes to go all out.
Speaker 1: I made Connor be for her. This one major deal
Speaker 1: breaker is a woman who doesn't respect waiters. Yes if wow,
Speaker 1: that's and they already they have that in comment. Okay,
Speaker 1: Connor's in the running, all right. I'm gonna put him
Speaker 1: so far as my winner or the next bachelor right now.
Speaker 1: And I hope that he's just the winner. I don't
Speaker 1: need to see him perspectators. I mean that all right.
Speaker 1: I heard Katie's not a good tipper, but that she
Speaker 1: does leave some sort of vibrating contraption on the table,
Speaker 1: usually left on. So they come back to the table
Speaker 1: it's vibrating. They have a good laugh. I didn't get
Speaker 1: a tip, but I laugh tonight, or they could or
Speaker 1: it's almost like, oh your table's really and then you're
Speaker 1: like a restaurant. They hand you a vibrator your vibrator
Speaker 1: goes off and you your vibrating coming in going would
Speaker 1: you like or a vibrator? Carl Tart take it away
Speaker 1: all right, Carl, it's great in the O G Smoke
Speaker 1: Show shirt. Are you kidding me? How much do we
Speaker 1: love Smoke Show? Talk to me? Only one end? I
Speaker 1: noticed that initial, Then I guess for the uh. Former
Speaker 1: baseball player from coast to mesa athletic stud with a
Speaker 1: Midwestern heart of gold. He currently in South the California
Speaker 1: where spend much of his time on the beach, but
Speaker 1: he dreams of moving to Oklahoma to settle you know
Speaker 1: what you see and okay, and then he his dream
Speaker 1: woman as as a caregiver and genuinely cares for others
Speaker 1: who want to see the people around him succeed, people
Speaker 1: around the people around them succeed. He's always up for
Speaker 1: a good time, and he likes going out bowling, and
Speaker 1: he wants did here it is find. He wants to
Speaker 1: find somebody who has similar religious beliefs to him, and
Speaker 1: he wants to raise his family in the church. He's
Speaker 1: not that right, She's not super. I don't know where
Speaker 1: she I don't think she is. I don't think she's
Speaker 1: a I don't think she's pretty liberal. Oh he's a virgin.
Speaker 1: He's a virgin. Okay, I feel like I would disagree
Speaker 1: with you know, Okay, they would that. I feel like
Speaker 1: this dude is I feel like this dude is a
Speaker 1: dude that you should stay away from when you got drunk.
Speaker 1: Used to me, I used to fight dudes like this
Speaker 1: in high school. Yes, I'm from here. I'm from Los Angeles.
Speaker 1: I played UH sports at the inner city school and
Speaker 1: then sometimes we travel and play against schools that didn't
Speaker 1: look so much like us, and they would say ship
Speaker 1: and he but what then you say, andy bro. He
Speaker 1: reminds me of that type of guy, aggressive who wants
Speaker 1: to live in Oklahoma. They're so Bigfornia. It's like, just
Speaker 1: do it, man, Like houses are more affordable, like make
Speaker 1: the move, go for it and dil dope. It is
Speaker 1: pretty liberal. I follow her on Instagram. Talk to me
Speaker 1: she is she. I want to know more about her,
Speaker 1: Tell me about tell me Lieral Dildobey stands up for stuff. Dildobey.
Speaker 1: Jill Connor loves Brexitritos and Blue Bay pancakes. Can't find them.
Speaker 1: Fuck yourself, carnor no coroner. No, okay, great, watch He's
Speaker 1: not trust me, He's not. He's definitely watching. We have
Speaker 1: David also from Nashville. Twenty seven year old. Okay yeah,
Speaker 1: New York City. Okay, right, okay, he's he's saying, okay, wait, okay, okay,
Speaker 1: be cool, be cool. He's a twenty seven year old.
Speaker 1: He's your always getting circles to my laught Foley. He's
Speaker 1: a fan of David. He's a first generation American. He
Speaker 1: was born and raised by Jamaican parents in New York.
Speaker 1: He recently recently left a family unit in New York
Speaker 1: to pursue career opportunities in tech sales and Nashville. Great city,
Speaker 1: Love Nashville. He's looking for a woman who's intelligent and
Speaker 1: driven to succeeed love it. Excuse me. Extremely attracted to
Speaker 1: women who has suited quiet confidence, quiet um. Uh. Synchronicity
Speaker 1: in life is the of the uh. Synchronicity in life
Speaker 1: is of the utmost importance for David, and he hopes
Speaker 1: to find a partner that is as passionate about building
Speaker 1: a successful life both professionally and romantically as he is.
Speaker 1: He wants a wife who's proud to stand next to
Speaker 1: him for the rest of their lives, and he hopes
Speaker 1: he loves his He likes pizza from New York Pizza,
Speaker 1: and his favorite boy band is Instant David. He's in
Speaker 1: my top three. He's gonna get along with Brandon. They're
Speaker 1: both going to be walking over here. Yeah yeah, oh Brandon,
Speaker 1: I like I liked um the in sync and the
Speaker 1: pizza in the middle. No, I felt like controlling man?
Speaker 1: Oh why why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Quiet? Just go
Speaker 1: in the corner. And that's being confident that what I
Speaker 1: order you for your meal, it's suffice. Okay, that's all right.
Speaker 1: Then don't you think he was on the debate team.
Speaker 1: He loves debate. She's a great debate I know. But
Speaker 1: loving debate also means like I gotta win. So I'm
Speaker 1: twenty eight. Here's what I did in high school. There's
Speaker 1: a weird way to open up. But New York Lady,
Speaker 1: I'm thirty two and I still do that. What what
Speaker 1: do you say? Oh? He's saying, I got a Questiondy groans.
Speaker 1: When they mentioned marriage, I thought that was the point
Speaker 1: of this show. I didn't hear then, did they grown
Speaker 1: at marriage? They're looking for a wif I hear people go,
Speaker 1: what what was it grown about? I see stripe shirt?
Speaker 1: What was your grown quiet? He said? Looking for a
Speaker 1: wife that is quiet. Okay, yeah, that would say. I'll
Speaker 1: give you occasional rave, but I'm not going to give
Speaker 1: you confidence. Yeah. Yeah, you know I had him circled.
Speaker 1: I had had him circled two weeks I had I'm circled.
Speaker 1: All right, I keep your confidence to yourself. All right,
Speaker 1: here we go. Next time you're with your confident. Oh
Speaker 1: my god, I like I like, my god, I take
Speaker 1: it take away, to take it away. It's Gabrielle gabriel Okay,
Speaker 1: literally looks like a magician designed magician. Do you My
Speaker 1: friend is watching at home. I got a text from
Speaker 1: her once. I was like, I'm a Vons. Shecause I'm
Speaker 1: a Bonds by the Melons and I just met a
Speaker 1: magician you didn't named Jerry. I'm like, what what do
Speaker 1: you try? Like a guy? I made out with a
Speaker 1: L twenty was not a minute became If you can't
Speaker 1: become a magician after I've made out with you, I
Speaker 1: was made out of them. If I know it's going
Speaker 1: to become a magician, maybe you made him magical. I
Speaker 1: did it wasn't that excited. I mean it was just
Speaker 1: like neck up magut. I did date a couple of
Speaker 1: magicians and they're con artists? Are they? Well? There? You know,
Speaker 1: it's I think would be popular. Many people here have
Speaker 1: dated the magical? Anybody here clapping it? Magician? There's three
Speaker 1: hands up in the back. Oh my god? Three people
Speaker 1: have dated artist? Were they con artists? They tend to
Speaker 1: stretch exaggeration, like everything is the best or don't look
Speaker 1: over here, or don't look over for three years? Is
Speaker 1: it the queen of arts? Or could we be in
Speaker 1: the throuble? Did you just misdirection? Don't worry about this
Speaker 1: traffic over here? Let's cross the street. Street all right,
Speaker 1: we gotta keep it moving. We gotta keep it, we
Speaker 1: gotta we got to keep it moving very quickly. Gabriel.
Speaker 1: Gabriel loves the expression renaissance man. I think we're done right? Okay? Yeah?
Speaker 1: He likes uh favorite James Bonner. He understood. Gabriel doesn't
Speaker 1: understand the concept of ath leisure. I'm gonna calm the ships,
Speaker 1: and believes that should conspect elegant styles of the past. Again,
Speaker 1: Oh you gay? What did he say? Gabriel doesn't understand
Speaker 1: the concept of a leisure and believes that people should
Speaker 1: respect elegant styles of the past. I would say, look
Speaker 1: for a man Gabriel. All right, I'm gonna play Gabriel
Speaker 1: under Thursday. Gabriel wants to fund a renaissance. Alright, Secretary
Speaker 1: of State, here we go, keep it clipping. Okay, I
Speaker 1: have Garrett who so many pages? Oh I believe you think? Yeah, okay, Garrett?
Speaker 1: Is that a ging exciting? There is Garretts. Oh, there
Speaker 1: should be Garrett, because Garrett was the guy that like
Speaker 1: he that beca ended up with that was not good. Okay,
Speaker 1: tangy okay. Let's see if we let's open up our minds.
Speaker 1: Let's see if you try information. Well, he's not in
Speaker 1: my top three, but let's see what no tangy hanging.
Speaker 1: Get that tanger out of there, hag tangy Okay. Garrett
Speaker 1: was raised in a small California town where ranch life,
Speaker 1: barbecue is in baseball, where the backdrop of his childhood.
Speaker 1: Now he lives a life dedicated to his career in marketing,
Speaker 1: which he absolutely loves, but the only thing missing is
Speaker 1: an amazing woman to share it with. His dream woman
Speaker 1: is carrying into legion and someone who prides herself on
Speaker 1: being a critical thinker. That's a little weird to say
Speaker 1: that Garrett romantic. He says the perfect date is a
Speaker 1: night out at his favorite steakhouse, followed by cozy time
Speaker 1: at home and enjoying some good wine. I get that
Speaker 1: while getting warm by the fire. Garrett is a yolo
Speaker 1: type of god. Okay, he's out, he's out, but take
Speaker 1: note he is very loyal and is looking for a walk.
Speaker 1: He's not at not a one night stand in caps Oh.
Speaker 1: At the end of the day, Garrett is looking for
Speaker 1: something that lasts forever and dreams of sitting down next
Speaker 1: to his wife, holding her hand and looking gratefully at
Speaker 1: the beautiful family that they've built together. How sweet is that? Question? Mark?
Speaker 1: It is? He's screaming, land Carl, what do you think?
Speaker 1: What the what the groans are? Dr Banana? Yo? Low?
Speaker 1: I mean get wife. He's a fun sponge. The wife
Speaker 1: is fine. It's the it's like romantic by the fire.
Speaker 1: It feels like it feels it's you know, by the way,
Speaker 1: I would have the stupidest bio like she hangs out
Speaker 1: with her cat that has thumbs. She wears enormous glasses
Speaker 1: and is delighted when people were being tennit to sleep
Speaker 1: at night. She made a puzzle that like Hurt, she recreats.
Speaker 1: She paid six hundred dollars to braces. She's great with money.
Speaker 1: Six hurt dollars to full adult braces me to recreate
Speaker 1: her eighth grade photo. You know what I mean? Like,
Speaker 1: I just learned, if you start saving money now, you're
Speaker 1: not fucked. Yeah. Can I you like Garrett? I don't
Speaker 1: have him, so he's keep being the top three foods.
Speaker 1: I related in the fact that if me and this
Speaker 1: dude go to Buffalo wa Wings, neither of us are
Speaker 1: going to what are like mango habin yet rome. Okay,
Speaker 1: you're not a tangy man hot and barbecue or peper.
Speaker 1: I guess lemon pepper could be considered tangy. There's a
Speaker 1: little lemon in that. That's a slight tang all right,
Speaker 1: maybe I don't like it? All right? Can I quite?
Speaker 1: I'm sorry? Can I just quickly address the fact that, um,
Speaker 1: I do I do have a learning disability? But when
Speaker 1: I said yolo, I thought he meant fomo. No, you
Speaker 1: only live once. Okay, I'm fine with that. Similar year
Speaker 1: of missing out, but he wants to have a wife.
Speaker 1: That confused me. Right, you only live once, got it? Okay,
Speaker 1: so you might as well have a wife. Captain Rookie
Speaker 1: of the or you've been by the way, Doug, can
Speaker 1: you please tell people where you were again last week?
Speaker 1: And the most spectacular Rookie, the most method rookie. We have.
Speaker 1: I visit laquint frequently, frequently. It's been my third time
Speaker 1: and it's it's just lovely. That's they filmed last year's bachelorette,
Speaker 1: and so he saw there and has not keeps going
Speaker 1: to visit. That's gonna be you. You're looking at your
Speaker 1: ghosts of Christmas future, Carl. This is you give in
Speaker 1: that outfit and you're gonna have to come back from
Speaker 1: hang out in a mansion in Calabasas. This is who
Speaker 1: you're going to be in four months? Are you ready for?
Speaker 1: Definitely want to go to Semi Colon when they filmed
Speaker 1: the last one. Yes, we call it. I want to
Speaker 1: check that place. I kind of want to go to
Speaker 1: every bachelor I need to go. We need to go
Speaker 1: on a group trip, I think. Okay, rookie, take it away.
Speaker 1: You next, you have Greg I've got Greg. Yeah, he's
Speaker 1: from New Jersey. He does, he's in marketing. I think
Speaker 1: half of these guys are in marketing, so half of
Speaker 1: these guys don't want to say what they really do. Yeah,
Speaker 1: he cries during movies, which is you know, weird because
Speaker 1: you know it's airplane or something to the lake. Why
Speaker 1: the Lakers would come and play in New Jersey? I
Speaker 1: don't know why. It's well, they're in Brooklyn now, right,
Speaker 1: But why wouldn't he be able to go see him play?
Speaker 1: We should be something. He's just the market and sales rep.
Speaker 1: He's not talking fairly easy to go. Yeah, yeah, just
Speaker 1: like I got Zipper seats to the game. You want
Speaker 1: to come because Zipper money. I gotta Sier money. I'm
Speaker 1: not mad at Greg. I'm not mad at Greg. You guys,
Speaker 1: how do you guys feel about Grey? He's like Aaron Rodgers?
Speaker 1: Doesn't he have like a little Aaron Rodgers? She says,
Speaker 1: with a haircut, he looks like a beefed out Joseph
Speaker 1: Gordon Levitt. Hey are not mad at that? She is correct,
Speaker 1: he's really hot. Okay, thank you, Katie lavin me out
Speaker 1: of applause for the production tear like that's a terrible photo. Like, yes,
Speaker 1: I should have read this. I should have read this.
Speaker 1: It says right here, Greg is the full package. If
Speaker 1: I had just read that, we could have all right,
Speaker 1: we would have known right up next we have the
Speaker 1: production team. I believe that's you, miss Katie. Yes, we
Speaker 1: have Hunter and he is thirty four. A software strategy
Speaker 1: is anybody watching below deck sailing yacht. He reminds me
Speaker 1: of the really tall dude j L. That thought he had,
Speaker 1: that thought he had v D. But he just had
Speaker 1: He just had like friction. Okay, he looks like he
Speaker 1: He's an expressive, passionate, outgoing person who does not believe
Speaker 1: in holding back. He's a father of two amazing children.
Speaker 1: He loves to make happy he has. He's been a
Speaker 1: romantic and says that even as a child, he was
Speaker 1: known for writing incredible love letters and always being the
Speaker 1: guy to surprise his crushes with mixtapes and flowers. He's
Speaker 1: looking for a woman to be his other half. Okay,
Speaker 1: it's very sweet. Okay, he wanted sweet. One of his
Speaker 1: favorite pastimes is people watching. I used to kill them
Speaker 1: to to mark get a mark, and then fucking dismember them.
Speaker 1: He has never ridden a horse, but he really wants to.
Speaker 1: He's a dreamer because he's gonna ride up the horse.
Speaker 1: And I disagree. I think he's sweet, but I don't
Speaker 1: think it's more. I think he's a bunch of tas
Speaker 1: you can see on Instagram as much. Do you think
Speaker 1: he's gonna like him? Okay, she's I think you're right. Oh,
Speaker 1: for the people people at home are incredible, by the way,
Speaker 1: to the people that showed up in person, yeah, these
Speaker 1: I love. I'm so grateful, and again thank you to
Speaker 1: Dynasty Typewriter. And we will keep it clipping. They think
Speaker 1: he's gonna get people. They think that he's going to
Speaker 1: get the horse date and that they think that she's
Speaker 1: gonna like him? And what are people staying at home?
Speaker 1: We'll check him before we do another round. What are
Speaker 1: the people saying. Do they think that she's gonna like him? Yeah?
Speaker 1: Everyone saying it looks like he's probably gonna get the horse,
Speaker 1: dak he's a creeper slash serial killer. On the first night,
Speaker 1: what drunk on the first crying on the first time,
Speaker 1: crying on the first night, crying on the first night.
Speaker 1: I want to get married. There's a dead body under
Speaker 1: the All right, we're gonna double time out here we go, Rob,
Speaker 1: you have this guy is definitely a player. Everybody. My
Speaker 1: name's Jeff from from New Jersey. Here it comes Jeff,
Speaker 1: Here comes Jeff. No, he's from a Jackie Collins novel. Yo. Yeah,
Speaker 1: he's a jiggalow go. He's from New Jersey. He comes
Speaker 1: from a big Italian family. He's looking to find the
Speaker 1: love that his parents had. Of course he does. He
Speaker 1: only runs his hand, his fingers through his hair. On
Speaker 1: one side, jeff family is everything, and he still finds
Speaker 1: time every weekend to mow his parents lawn. You still
Speaker 1: laundry and sit down for a big Italian dinner. When
Speaker 1: he's not showing down on the plate of his mom's
Speaker 1: home cooked meal, Jeff is dealing with his client both
Speaker 1: in and out of the operating room. He is skin salary.
Speaker 1: That is artificial. I want what are your rob keep doing?
Speaker 1: He's an artificial skin sales rep. Hey, I got your
Speaker 1: your blonde skin, your tanned skin. Wait a minute, what's
Speaker 1: the past that real skin is so expensive? You get
Speaker 1: I got you. I'm assuming this was like somebody gets
Speaker 1: burnt or something like that. Yes, grass black anymore or
Speaker 1: it's silence of the lamb ship people. Is she gonna
Speaker 1: be dild o'bey gonna be able to get past go?
Speaker 1: Is she is she gonna find that compassionate or creepy?
Speaker 1: I personally think she's gonna love this dude. I'm going
Speaker 1: to school. She can get alone with a Brandon his
Speaker 1: will you know his family and his professional life. Here
Speaker 1: a great place someone to find the one thing he's missing. Love.
Speaker 1: Jeff to be a c agent, going and alright taking
Speaker 1: an adventurous woman. I like this skin salesman. I'm just
Speaker 1: seeing the skin game for now. I'm going I'm gonna
Speaker 1: join the CIA someday and the Zippers. Okay, John all right?
Speaker 1: John John is from Pacific Beach. He's a thrill seeker,
Speaker 1: and he says on The Bachelor rete thrill he will find.
Speaker 1: He's getting his pilot license. I like that. I'm gonna
Speaker 1: have geek as will Uh. He loves. He's a San
Speaker 1: Diego guy. He's looking for somebody who's genuine, honest and
Speaker 1: willing to challenge him. He hates Oh, he loves when
Speaker 1: a woman is confident in her natural beauty. That turns
Speaker 1: him on. Uh more than anything. He has little talents
Speaker 1: for anybody being unfaithful or dishonest, which means he cheats.
Speaker 1: You think so and uh he's uh veget I can't say, Oh,
Speaker 1: Aaron has written something else. I can't say it. She
Speaker 1: can say it. Heves. Uh. He says, if you've never
Speaker 1: heard of a Kiwi Barry John wants you to google
Speaker 1: him and eat one immediately. I feel like if we
Speaker 1: haven't heard of it, it's probably not readily available. I'm sorry, Yeah, okay,
Speaker 1: you Aaron. He thinks he thinks swing dancing is so
Speaker 1: much fun because he's getting Okay, Next al right, he's
Speaker 1: like he's got a precious gateboy vibe. Yeah, he's adorable.
Speaker 1: He's adorable, but I don't think Bill do bay. Okay.
Speaker 1: Next up we have Josh. She's twenty five from Miami.
Speaker 1: He's cute. He's an I T consultant. Um. Hold please hope,
Speaker 1: please excuse me? That's right? Okay, he is Um. He's
Speaker 1: from Florida. He uh, he loves hard and he says
Speaker 1: he loves hard. He's opening with that could be cray.
Speaker 1: He says, there's really no other way to put it.
Speaker 1: I might put cray. Then, um, he's humble, kind hearted,
Speaker 1: and goofy. But he's also a hopeless romantic. If you
Speaker 1: say loves hard, other way to put a hopeless romantic
Speaker 1: that's like in the first that might be the motive. Um,
Speaker 1: but he's a hopeless romantic who's been very in touch
Speaker 1: with his emotions. Oh, he's gonna crying, okay. Um. He's
Speaker 1: looking for a woman that's kind, open minded, ambitious, and
Speaker 1: adventurous love that constantly strives to be genuine. Wants to
Speaker 1: find a partner who will do the same. Okay. He's
Speaker 1: extremely family aren't and he wants to bring someone to
Speaker 1: bring home to his amazing family for a night of
Speaker 1: barbecue and playing cards as a dream come true. I
Speaker 1: love barbecue in cards. I think he's in my top three.
Speaker 1: I love cards. I'm not even joking. I love barbecue
Speaker 1: and cards. She needs someone that loves hard. He show
Speaker 1: his future wife and kids the same at conditional love
Speaker 1: he had growing up. Um. He hopes to travel to Asia.
Speaker 1: He has to sleep on the right side of the bed,
Speaker 1: and he starts celebrating Christmas in October. I like, Josh,
Speaker 1: wake up, wake up, it's October first. Shut up. I
Speaker 1: like you for her for me. I like Josh, I
Speaker 1: like Christmas, I like barbecue, and I like cards. So
Speaker 1: I'm gonna put Josh for me storky like enough, I'm
Speaker 1: putting him down as a villain. Okay, great, all right, Next,
Speaker 1: Dr Banana, What do you guys think does Katie does
Speaker 1: Josh have a hot Instagram? Okay? Great, you can't find it?
Speaker 1: Which is what she wants? Okay, I just gold her? Okay,
Speaker 1: what are we on? Justin? Next? We have just okay,
Speaker 1: we're making this quick twenty six investment sales consultant? Who
Speaker 1: is it? Okay? Um, Justin does not like to dance
Speaker 1: at all? Had you have no joy the path for
Speaker 1: Aaron and I? Or when we try to have to
Speaker 1: dance with us? I think I know why he doesn't
Speaker 1: like to dance, but I'm not gonna say why. Wait
Speaker 1: what you don't like? Why doesn't he like to dance?
Speaker 1: All right? I think this dude has a lot of
Speaker 1: white friends and he doesn't like to dance because they'll
Speaker 1: put the pressure on him to be a really good dancer.
Speaker 1: And he's probably a marginally talented dancer. Right, larginally talented
Speaker 1: dancer is better? Why I don't like the freestyle rap right,
Speaker 1: Oh my god, I don't know. I just everybody's gonna
Speaker 1: be like, oh man calls about the rap, oh hell yeah,
Speaker 1: And I'm like, hey, I don't have the expectation is
Speaker 1: to him? Yeah, yeah, yeah, it makes sense even trying.
Speaker 1: But you've been trying? Is it means you know you've Yeah,
Speaker 1: I can't. I'm so disappointed that there's a person that
Speaker 1: doesn't like to dance. I don't ask me to. Yeah,
Speaker 1: co tar lady and gentleman, isn't it how wait? Wait, wait, wait,
Speaker 1: I do have to say this? What wait? Hold on,
Speaker 1: talk to me. This is this is for us, talk
Speaker 1: to me. Um okay, but she's wait, hold on, hold on.
Speaker 1: And then this is talking about a woman who wants Trustworter.
Speaker 1: They committed the idea of teamwork in a relationship. She's
Speaker 1: passionate about fitness, but also loves to enjoy Dave barbecuing
Speaker 1: and a good bottle of Solve Block. That's you. I
Speaker 1: like him. I'm gonna braid your hair so tight. I
Speaker 1: think I think Jess could be top three. Do you
Speaker 1: guys think top three for Justin? I don't know, but
Speaker 1: I do like a man that loves a woman. That
Speaker 1: loves solf blank all right, top three because he won't
Speaker 1: dam us? Why because he doesn't like to dance? Whoa,
Speaker 1: I don't kill you. I mean, you know the first
Speaker 1: guy I said it was a district attorney, right, I
Speaker 1: mean he's a villain. The district attorney's a villain. I
Speaker 1: gotta put that as the villa your names nailing it.
Speaker 1: I don't know, I'm not. I actually circling justin. He's
Speaker 1: he could be in my top three. I I think
Speaker 1: he sounds sweet. Okay, up next, peget take it away?
Speaker 1: Oh I don't want god. I don't know if I
Speaker 1: feel like he's been on the show before. Well, I'm
Speaker 1: kind of confused because yeah, he's a dandy. You're right,
Speaker 1: and he speaks English and French. But here's the thing,
Speaker 1: I don't know if I'm ford or against it. He's
Speaker 1: a motivational speaker. Again, I got what If he's motivating people,
Speaker 1: Carl isn't thirsty, then motivation a marriage and I haven't
Speaker 1: read this. Carl is a charismatic, confident guy here to
Speaker 1: find his form. He lets have a good time and
Speaker 1: making a good time for everyone around him. Long term
Speaker 1: relationship in the past, but hard time fully committing. He
Speaker 1: has professional goals that have outweighed his personal once. Now
Speaker 1: well now I've done that. Now all that has changed.
Speaker 1: Carl is ready to make funny. His wife is priority.
Speaker 1: I'm trying to find this he wants off the charts chemistry. Oh,
Speaker 1: who wants the Oh she should be fun and spunky.
Speaker 1: Also love those same qualities in him, so he's needed
Speaker 1: right away. Um, he will take you jet skiing on
Speaker 1: a date and then read you a poem. No oh, sorry,
Speaker 1: he wrote himself. Even worse. No, I can't imagine a date.
Speaker 1: I would like less than somebody dragging me on a
Speaker 1: jet ski to that, although it would be so amazing,
Speaker 1: imagine getting brought on a jet ski and have somebody
Speaker 1: like I wrote this. The waves are so blue. I
Speaker 1: go over the web. You are my wave. I love
Speaker 1: us to do get in my pants via the way
Speaker 1: looky here to his bullet point is Carl's favorite holidays
Speaker 1: New Year's Day, because he loves the feeling of a
Speaker 1: fresh start. I'm gonna put thirsty because I hate to
Speaker 1: say I love Year's Day. I really do. I love
Speaker 1: I like I. Actually I don't like him, but I
Speaker 1: like fresh I don't like New Year's Gig because I
Speaker 1: get sad because it means that that I love. I
Speaker 1: love Halloween, Thanksgiving, my birthday, Christmas. You know I hit
Speaker 1: that ship hard. You know I've heard hard. I love
Speaker 1: New Year's Day. There's great football games, it's great college
Speaker 1: football games. And then you life my birthday. Alright, you're
Speaker 1: pretty sports. You don't look at like, Oh now I'm
Speaker 1: supposed to lose weight and stop drinking. Fuck, it's down
Speaker 1: started after my birthday. Maybe I'll start after you, like,
Speaker 1: let's start after Carl's birthday. Alright, alright, captain? Are you
Speaker 1: doing over there? Captain? Captain is just staying away. I'm
Speaker 1: trying to find any any true interesting piece of information
Speaker 1: about Kyle Kyle. Kyle is all lies all the time.
Speaker 1: He is a no yeah no biography. I skimmed it.
Speaker 1: And he wants he wants to live a romantic comedy. Uh.
Speaker 1: He likes romance. He likes to be romantic, he likes
Speaker 1: to be compassionate. Like I swear to God, this could
Speaker 1: be about anybody. There's nothing specifically about hates mayonnaise and mustard.
Speaker 1: I hate Manning. I like him now. I love my
Speaker 1: number one does he love ketchup. I love ketchup. I'm
Speaker 1: gonna say villain. You say to three? You even at Hope. Please,
Speaker 1: so the people of the Okay, clap if you think
Speaker 1: he's a villain. Clap if you think he's top three,
Speaker 1: it's split Anna. One of the people at home think
Speaker 1: villain or top three? Plas harding girl. There's never been
Speaker 1: a good Kyle Kyle dun again. We love Kyle dun again. Yeah,
Speaker 1: never been a good Kyle Away. By the way, really
Speaker 1: shout out to the people at home coming and great
Speaker 1: with the comments. Do you trust a person that does
Speaker 1: not like condiments? I love a condiment. I just don't
Speaker 1: like mayonnaise, but I love a condis the worst man? Okay,
Speaker 1: will spoon, I will take a full of mayonnaise and
Speaker 1: shove it in my mind. I would I would eat
Speaker 1: my way to four hunderd pounds. If you locked me
Speaker 1: in a peanut butter factory for a weekend, I would
Speaker 1: literally eat the entire bat had come out, just like
Speaker 1: all the gum would be gone from my hair. But Okay,
Speaker 1: I cannot know you and your love of made listen.
Speaker 1: You can't make a nice They called post to sound
Speaker 1: you too. What are you okay, Doug? Okay, So we're
Speaker 1: up next and we have the production team. First noticeable
Speaker 1: cross necklace, cross necklace? All right, he's twenty five basketball
Speaker 1: coach Dallas, Texas whatever. He's outgoing successful collegiate basketball career, career.
Speaker 1: I don't recognize him, so it's not successful. People call
Speaker 1: me Sunshine working hard to get a master's degree in
Speaker 1: global business. He's ready for marriage and children. His priorities
Speaker 1: in life have changed, and he wants to find his soulmate.
Speaker 1: Blah blah. He's a believer. He wants a best friend
Speaker 1: he can be goofy with. He's a strong lover. That's weird. Uh,
Speaker 1: you know, he confuses me. I can't tell if he's
Speaker 1: good or evil. His major turn off is someone who
Speaker 1: won't mix well with his family. Um, he's figured out
Speaker 1: there's a difference between love for someone and being in love. Okay,
Speaker 1: all right, I think he's not. His nickname is Sunshine,
Speaker 1: and he's a true, proud and loyal believer. Yeah alright,
Speaker 1: and Christmas he's a simple man. I like Christmas length too,
Speaker 1: and I'm not mad at the beeB, but I do
Speaker 1: we think it only E's gonna make it to tough tree.
Speaker 1: Is he crazy drunk on the He's not drunk on
Speaker 1: the first night. He's right, so he's he's okay. Alright,
Speaker 1: how's everybody doing? We have we have one more row everybody,
Speaker 1: all right? I see we're keeping a moving We got
Speaker 1: one row left. Alright. We're just trying to not hold
Speaker 1: everybody hostage because it's East Coast. Is nine thirty on
Speaker 1: the we haven't been out of our home since fifteen months.
Speaker 1: We've been so lonely. It's your hard year. I'm just
Speaker 1: I'm ready to add. Oh it's this song, isn't This
Speaker 1: isn't my song? It isn't a case? Yeah, yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: isn't anyway. I don't like to do. Yeah, I don't
Speaker 1: like to do my father I was born Yeah yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1: You have to be there, he go. I have my
Speaker 1: short son already to add more men to keep this
Speaker 1: night going. People. Check myself again, my guy an accountant.
Speaker 1: This is who I am. I've come to terms with it.
Speaker 1: This is who I am. Why do you think we're
Speaker 1: all friends? All right? Rob? You're all of these people
Speaker 1: are either real estate agents or accountants. Marcus, here we go,
Speaker 1: Marcus or skin salesman. Uh. Marcus is a real estate agent,
Speaker 1: skin salesman salesman. The skin game was locked down for
Speaker 1: a whole year, and they're back. Marcus is a sweet guy.
Speaker 1: He can he cannot be with someone who is happy
Speaker 1: sitting on their laurels all day long, dreams out here?
Speaker 1: Are you ready to retire? Who the funk? Says that
Speaker 1: someone that's over eighty. I love sitting on my laurels.
Speaker 1: Sitting on my laurels, laurels. Um. He loves to play
Speaker 1: board games, Monopoly being his all time favorite. I love
Speaker 1: board games, Golden Girls Portland loves Portland's Catty, Marcus says. See.
Speaker 1: When describing himself as a lover, Marcus says he is amazing. Okay,
Speaker 1: you can't say that about yourself. And he likes to
Speaker 1: have music playing at all times. He fears a world
Speaker 1: where soap does not exist. Oh my god, I love
Speaker 1: this show so much. Marcus. There's literally no place I'd
Speaker 1: rather be right now than in a world where you
Speaker 1: would love to be Spider Man for a day, even
Speaker 1: though he's terrified something. He would love to be Spider
Speaker 1: Man for a day, even though he's afraid of spiders,
Speaker 1: he's Craig Craig. It makes this makes me feel better
Speaker 1: about I love it just a day thing, like he
Speaker 1: doesn't want to commit too much to it, Like a
Speaker 1: day will be enough. It seems really exciting, but it's
Speaker 1: gonna wear off quickly. Just shoot a few webs, fly
Speaker 1: around a little bit, and go home. Right, how do
Speaker 1: you feel? How do you feel about Marcus? Carl I
Speaker 1: picked Marcus to be the winner? You did? What do
Speaker 1: you want? Just for a day? He's just generic enough. Also,
Speaker 1: I'm also like, I don't remember why I thought his
Speaker 1: instagram is hot. He's really hot. He's hot. And he's
Speaker 1: from the Pacific Northwest. Okay, oh they both live in
Speaker 1: the woods. I'm later ask me, what were you saying?
Speaker 1: He's thirty one, he's from the Pacific Northwest? Why else
Speaker 1: do you think? Just those two great? Okay? And he's
Speaker 1: got a hot Instagram. I will tell you this. He's
Speaker 1: a he's a hypocrite and who says I don't like
Speaker 1: people who rest on their laurels, but supports the Los
Speaker 1: Angeles Lakers. Los Angeles got kicked out the playoffs last night.
Speaker 1: What everybody says is seventeen championships, though yeah, man, you're
Speaker 1: talking about championships. They won, thank you, they rested on
Speaker 1: your laurels. I don't know what the fun is. That's right, Aaron?
Speaker 1: Are you in love to my right? So? I mean
Speaker 1: technically they won last year, But the point is I
Speaker 1: hate the Lakers. Yeah, that's they're they're They're the fucking
Speaker 1: they're the fucking Patriots with the basketball better. They're better
Speaker 1: than the Patriots. Needs to say something, Well, I think
Speaker 1: he's super hard. I didn't. I didn't really see like
Speaker 1: the Lakers. I mean that's a gross No. No, he
Speaker 1: doesn't like the Lakers. He doesn't like the Lakers. The Lakers.
Speaker 1: He does market love, Marc. You're not a fan of
Speaker 1: fucking Damian Lillard and you're you're live in Portland's Ironically,
Speaker 1: he's a fan of Mathew Lillard from Scream and Okay,
Speaker 1: up next we have Marty. Okay, okay, here's what I'm
Speaker 1: gonna say about Marty. I'm not gonna say too much,
Speaker 1: but I'm gonna say, Aaron, can you hold up your sign?
Speaker 1: He looks like the lead singer from I Will I
Speaker 1: will happily accept this man into my tribe. Gorgeous. He
Speaker 1: is gorgeous. He's five. He's a dancer from Reno. He
Speaker 1: has big energy, big confidence, and lots of love to go.
Speaker 1: I don't think this man is gay. He's uh poor.
Speaker 1: He loves horseback riding. He explicitly prefers to watch movies indoors,
Speaker 1: which I totally agree with him. Anytime somebody's like we
Speaker 1: got the projector in the backyard, I'm like, let's go inside. Yeah,
Speaker 1: there's mosquitoes out here. Uh. And the way into his
Speaker 1: heart is through a good bottle of cologne. Uh, the
Speaker 1: one hanging Earringay, he's not gay. He is like a
Speaker 1: fuck machine. Yeah you know what. He is a player.
Speaker 1: It's one are the other. He's like a little he's like,
Speaker 1: he's like a he's like a trash it's like a
Speaker 1: part trashy because it's Reno and that's a trash festival
Speaker 1: of dreams. And then he's a dancer, so he's trying
Speaker 1: to get out a Reno. He's thirsty. Thursday, Thank you
Speaker 1: all right? Coming up next, we have Michael ian Black
Speaker 1: like looks like Michael. I don't have him. I don't
Speaker 1: have his cheat sheet, but he was one of my
Speaker 1: top three. Okay, this is a number one he loves.
Speaker 1: He loves nineties, R and B and rap music. Also
Speaker 1: sort of why he makes a mean plate of Dino duggets. Kids, kids,
Speaker 1: he makes chicken nuggets in the shape of dinosaurs. Okay,
Speaker 1: so he doesn't do our Okay, wait, here we go,
Speaker 1: here we go. You can't focus up, focus up. He's
Speaker 1: a single dad. She ready is dildobe, ready to be
Speaker 1: a stepmom. I think she could be. I think she's
Speaker 1: who'ld revolves around his amazing for you old son James. Sweet.
Speaker 1: That's sweet. When it comes to dating, the two of
Speaker 1: them are a packaged deal, and Michael wouldn't have it
Speaker 1: any other way. He lives a life that is incredibly
Speaker 1: fulfilling and says he's more than ready to find someone
Speaker 1: to share with. His dream woman is compassionate, empathetic, resilient
Speaker 1: and not easily offended and witty. Woman with a funny
Speaker 1: bone and a self deprecating sense of humor is a
Speaker 1: huge turn on from my goal, and he loves when
Speaker 1: a woman has strong convictions and stands up against ignorance.
Speaker 1: He basically read her bio and I was like, I
Speaker 1: want you. Um. Michael says that life is short and
Speaker 1: then he's ready to find a woman who makes a
Speaker 1: better person every day. Um and uh yeah, so all right,
Speaker 1: I think he's a contender. I think Michael is a contender.
Speaker 1: He's just boring enough to win. He was talk three
Speaker 1: before weeks ago when we started talking about the way
Speaker 1: we have insider info about it. He's a widower. Oh
Speaker 1: he seems like really like sweet and cute. Is that
Speaker 1: going to be too much? Is it gonna be? No,
Speaker 1: you're shaking your head. No clap if you think that
Speaker 1: he's going to make it to the top three. Cloud
Speaker 1: clap if you think he's gonna win. Okay, alright, right,
Speaker 1: all right, up next we have Mike Aaron take it
Speaker 1: away with my I have justin Oh, no, you have
Speaker 1: Mike Mike is wait a minute, I think we just
Speaker 1: did Michael. Right, Sorry Mike, so flip your the next one.
Speaker 1: You already did my apologize and Harry thinking is right?
Speaker 1: I have no Yeah, next Mike, Next, I'm sorry real quick.
Speaker 1: Thirty one Jim owner San Diego. So many problems already. Um.
Speaker 1: When people find out the great looking guy used to
Speaker 1: play professional baseball, they assume that must be a player,
Speaker 1: but actually couldn't freeze further from the truth. Okay, the
Speaker 1: fact that you have to say that means you are
Speaker 1: you can like to visit. He does not like the
Speaker 1: He does not like dessert. Um, Mike villain him did
Speaker 1: someone say kill him? Villain villain villain? Sorry, sorry, I'm
Speaker 1: so sorry. We're not going to look at you go hard,
Speaker 1: you're coming and you're live. Audience is spoken. I'm probably
Speaker 1: he's the next Bachelor, Mike san Diego says. Mike occasionally
Speaker 1: describes himself as basic. Wow, okay, but that's this shall
Speaker 1: all right? Yeah, I don't know. I don't know how
Speaker 1: much confidence that would exude if you were his partner.
Speaker 1: He's looking for a woman who loves staying active, will
Speaker 1: make him laugh, and most importantly, has the same set
Speaker 1: of values. Are we screaming like? O? C fucking gross
Speaker 1: conservative Republican. Mike's family is extremely important to him. Get
Speaker 1: in lines. He's also looking to find someone whose parents
Speaker 1: three sisters absolutely like his life. Ready to share? Yeah, okay,
Speaker 1: maybe villas villain villain clapper villain clapper villain villain. Yeah,
Speaker 1: anybody think he's gonna be top three? Okay? Alright, Courtney
Speaker 1: spelled Quartney Nutrition on entrepreneur. I don't know about an
Speaker 1: entrepreneur Dallas, Texas. When it comes to putting it all
Speaker 1: out there for love, Courtney is not afraid to make
Speaker 1: a spectacle. He's a compassionate, carrying, honest man who's going
Speaker 1: to make romantic gestures that make his partner feel special
Speaker 1: and for a woman who is outgoing, ambitious, like minded.
Speaker 1: When it comes to religious beliefs, that's fair which are
Speaker 1: important to him. He loves a daydream about having a family.
Speaker 1: Jesus the number one thing. He is looking for someone
Speaker 1: to be an amazing mother to his future children. So okay, okay, okay. Oh.
Speaker 1: He wants to leave a legacy. He needs a partner
Speaker 1: who stay side by side with him and build an empire,
Speaker 1: a lot of legacies. Oh you think Thursday, Do you
Speaker 1: think legacy is for Instagram? No, No legacy. If I
Speaker 1: think it's like a, it's a. It's the idea of
Speaker 1: we are going to be the king and queen of
Speaker 1: our lives. We're gonna be empower, We're gonna be a
Speaker 1: power couple. We're gonna leave a legacy. Are you asking
Speaker 1: me to do this or you described it? I have
Speaker 1: been asking you for six years. Are you awake? You're up?
Speaker 1: My friend? Thomas? Or we got three left? Thomas is next?
Speaker 1: Thomas Thomas Thomas. He wonders if the rock really can
Speaker 1: eat everything? What? No, the rock eats so clean that
Speaker 1: can really? Yeah, So he's basically a conspiracy theorist when
Speaker 1: it comes to the Rock in his professed eating habits.
Speaker 1: So this guy is already interesting with a lower case I.
Speaker 1: His favorite flower is a sunflower, which is what guys
Speaker 1: say when you ask them what their favorite favorite flower
Speaker 1: is because they don't think about it for goddamn second
Speaker 1: their entire life. And and why is he sitting around
Speaker 1: admitting that he rocked the ed hardy? Look? Hey, not
Speaker 1: only I wear stupid clothes. I also used that expression
Speaker 1: that went along with it. There was also lame. I
Speaker 1: would like to withdraw them from the competition. My name
Speaker 1: is Thomas. All right, are fine guys ready for our
Speaker 1: final two? All right? Take it away? Who has I
Speaker 1: believe the production team has tre Katy Levin. Trey is
Speaker 1: twenty six. He's a software engineer from Covington, Georgia. He's
Speaker 1: a handsome catch with a huge heart. He comes from
Speaker 1: a very close family and described himself, his outgoing, kind hearted,
Speaker 1: and open minded. He's looking for a strong, confident woman
Speaker 1: who was open everything life has to offer. Uh. He
Speaker 1: wants someone who's passionate and spontaneous. His favorite celebrity to meet,
Speaker 1: his favorite activity, well, I don't know why were Their
Speaker 1: favorite activity is to meet his friends for brunch into
Speaker 1: book club, and he loves the harmonica and is irrationally
Speaker 1: terrified of piranhas. I like him. I didn't, I didn't
Speaker 1: know I liked him. I don't really like him. Okay,
Speaker 1: I think he's too regular. Okay, nope, but she's pretty regular.
Speaker 1: But I think she thinks I think she are there.
Speaker 1: Two bachelors are just her so confused. Starts out with
Speaker 1: her and then they're doing Paradise and then they're doing Michelle,
Speaker 1: who we submitted Carl for. She should be so lucky.
Speaker 1: It's not going to happen. No, she should be so lucky. Yeah, people, Yes,
Speaker 1: is a man that likes brunch and book club like
Speaker 1: a regular dude. I mean, I definitely like bunch, all right,
Speaker 1: I liked I like books that okay, all right, I
Speaker 1: mean you gotta eat and you gotta read. Yeah for story, Okay, yeah,
Speaker 1: you know what. That's the It's too bad though, because
Speaker 1: if guys gone together to talk about books, that would
Speaker 1: be kind of sweet. What I'm saying is you do
Speaker 1: read this night, did you? Yeah? We read The Four
Speaker 1: Agreements and we also read the autobiography of Malcolm X. Yeah.
Speaker 1: We talked about it. But it wasn't like a book club.
Speaker 1: That's kind of a book club. I think you had
Speaker 1: a book club that the books. I feel like this, like, hey, guys,
Speaker 1: we're gonna have a book gathering. It better not be
Speaker 1: a book club book club. Speaking of book clubs, I'm
Speaker 1: having my or personal side for my book, which I released.
Speaker 1: I'm doing it in my hometown at Wilburg's General Store,
Speaker 1: Little Compton, Rhode Island, July eleven. It's a Saturday. I'll
Speaker 1: be at the general store Willibur's, which is the only
Speaker 1: store in town. I'll be there with my brother Aleric,
Speaker 1: signing books at eleven am at my first ever live
Speaker 1: in person book signing. If you guys want to come
Speaker 1: come to Little Compton, look for Poel the Crow. I'm
Speaker 1: having my my brother and I will be in the
Speaker 1: general Store, which is like the Nordstrom's of Little Compton.
Speaker 1: All Right, we have one more. It's the box. Okay,
Speaker 1: so there's theories. Tell me what I don't know. The
Speaker 1: theory is dr Banana. Can you tell people? Because yeah,
Speaker 1: I mean people are saying Blake Moyne's from Tatians because
Speaker 1: he's thirsty. That would be cray Crayon thirsty right there.
Speaker 1: He was the crazy guy. That was the Canadian who
Speaker 1: seemed sweet at first and then he like he got
Speaker 1: like the beard and he was like, yeah, he had
Speaker 1: a boner and he was like he was like, I
Speaker 1: called the cook Dementia Claire. Like he didn't say he
Speaker 1: read it. He was like, I purchased that book on
Speaker 1: then show. I was thinking of someone else that then
Speaker 1: he had the bon that's right, he had with the
Speaker 1: other bats. It was a Canadian Like, Okay, here's the deal.
Speaker 1: So we don't hold everybody hostage and so that Dynasty
Speaker 1: will have us back because we can stay on schedule. Dynasty,
Speaker 1: here we go. No, but we want to because the
Speaker 1: they're the jam for another run of applause for Dynasty. Typewriter,
Speaker 1: you need to buy their merge, support their show. Let's
Speaker 1: go to their other in person events, go to their
Speaker 1: their virtual events for the best we love Dynasty. Here
Speaker 1: we go. We're gonna get two full rounds of a
Speaker 1: two and a half minute song. We'll start with one
Speaker 1: round and if we need another, we'll do the second round.
Speaker 1: Make your picks, everybody. Sammy put on a really stressful
Speaker 1: song that is Here we Go. I picked this out.
Speaker 1: Here we Go Blasted. Ammy also lead in. All Right,
Speaker 1: we're gonna start with Katie Levine and go down the line,
Speaker 1: or do you want to start with Doug. We're starting
Speaker 1: with Doug. Now I can go first. Okay, Okay, here
Speaker 1: we go, Katie log it in top three and order.
Speaker 1: Here we go, uh, Greg, Marcus and Michael okay, and
Speaker 1: then I think the next bachelor might be Michael. Okay,
Speaker 1: we're coming close, and he's like, you know, a single dad.
Speaker 1: He looks cool villain. I guess Gabriel. Okay, oh right, right,
Speaker 1: I forgot about Gabriel on the first night. I really
Speaker 1: don't know. I just I can't do sure, Jeff. I'll
Speaker 1: go with Jeff, and then Thirsty Thirstiest. If it is
Speaker 1: Blake Moyan's it's him. Yeah, okay, great, I love it. Dr.
Speaker 1: But let's do Dr Banana. This woman makes every flyer
Speaker 1: she's such a maniac. She is we have we have
Speaker 1: been such a journey together. I never I know everybody
Speaker 1: here go Okay, my top three in order our Connor
Speaker 1: b yep, Justin and then Marcus yep. My next bachelor
Speaker 1: is Justin okay. Um villain is Gabriel because I think
Speaker 1: he's like the new Bennett. Okay. Uh. Drunk on the
Speaker 1: first night, I wrote Hunter okay. And thirstiest is Carl
Speaker 1: because he's a motivational speaker. Okay, great, I love it
Speaker 1: all right, Next up, I don't remember where's Okarl with
Speaker 1: a k? Where's Carl with I gotta look it up? Okay,
Speaker 1: next up, take it away Bachelor of the year. Um, okay,
Speaker 1: So top three, I've got Marcus, then David yep uh
Speaker 1: and Christian as my third. Okay, great, next bachelor, I
Speaker 1: said Justin? Okay, great, great villain, I said Kyle, Um,
Speaker 1: can we maybe put the grid up with everybody's faces
Speaker 1: just well everybody's that would be great. That's great. Okay,
Speaker 1: great Bill, And I said Kyle, I just don't trust
Speaker 1: his mug. Okay. Great. Drunk on the first night, I
Speaker 1: said Brandon with an oh, the guy with the long
Speaker 1: hair Okay, great, Yeah, I really want him to make
Speaker 1: a scene. Uh thirsty est, I said, Marty with the
Speaker 1: chain and the long ear ring. Great, Craig, Craig Craig,
Speaker 1: I said, Gabriel, Great Gabriel for Craig Craig, the magician,
Speaker 1: you know, the magician. And then I just want to
Speaker 1: give a special shout out. I want something good to
Speaker 1: happen to Jeff, my boyfriend, New Jersey. Something happened with Jeff.
Speaker 1: I do too. I feel like he's gonna kill Paradise.
Speaker 1: He's gonna, yeah, he's gonna kill. He's gonna be like
Speaker 1: definitely like squiring himself around Paradise. Okay, great, Carol Art, Okay,
Speaker 1: I just wanna say that I don't I don't watch
Speaker 1: the show this the Matt season was the first time
Speaker 1: I saw it, So I don't want to disrespect y'all's processes.
Speaker 1: Yeah great, this is very professional. So I just want
Speaker 1: to people. I don't want people groaning at me. Although
Speaker 1: I do want to be married with five kids, I
Speaker 1: want seven. Okay, Uh, Top three in order, Marcus Michael Austin. Wait,
Speaker 1: hold please, I gotta I gotta clock that area, Michael,
Speaker 1: which one was Michael and my trip is there Austin,
Speaker 1: Austin the time that the beach white shoes is awesome. Yink,
Speaker 1: He's cool. Yeah, great, Okay, that's cool. I got a
Speaker 1: man crush. Okay, great, Uh ex bachelor, I say Jeff
Speaker 1: from his picture, but I also slashed it with a
Speaker 1: trade with a question mark. Okay, okay, I don't I
Speaker 1: don't think I'm sorry, y'all. I'm new to this. I
Speaker 1: don't mean to disrestrate the processes, but I don't think
Speaker 1: they're going to pick another black. I agree with you.
Speaker 1: Soon after I agree with you, I think they they
Speaker 1: just generally get it wrong. Yeah. Yeah, So I'm gonna
Speaker 1: go Jeff with that villain, I said Mike, Okay, Mike,
Speaker 1: oh yeah yeah, yeah yeah yeah, yeah yeah, great, Okay,
Speaker 1: here we go. Top three everybody, and then uh drunk
Speaker 1: on the first I said Brandon, Yes, I said Landona,
Speaker 1: Craig Gray, I said Gabriel. That dude is gonna be
Speaker 1: a weirdo. Oh yeah yeah yeah, okay, oh yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: yeah yeah, okay, Top three in order. I went for
Speaker 1: Connor with There's only one with two ends Connor B
Speaker 1: Connor B. I then went with Marcus I then chose Greg,
Speaker 1: who's great Greg with Okay. Then for the next Bachelor,
Speaker 1: I said Marcus slash Jeff. Then for Villain, I said
Speaker 1: Andrew the district Attorney is going to be a little
Speaker 1: like just a little dick. And then I picked drunk
Speaker 1: on the first night, Hair Brandon, um, Craig Cray, I
Speaker 1: did Magician, Gabriel and Thirstiest. I did the box. Whoever's
Speaker 1: coming back who I don't care who it is is
Speaker 1: the thirstiest. That's what I picked as the box. Just
Speaker 1: a quick round of applause for Arden for putting this
Speaker 1: entire night together. Dead yet thanks for doing anything just dream.
Speaker 1: I love doing this. Um. I love games. I love games.
Speaker 1: I love games. This whole thing is a game. To spoilers,
Speaker 1: I don't want to know. It's my games. This is
Speaker 1: my baseball. Top three Alexis Barnaby and Conchilla Top three
Speaker 1: number number number one, Michael, who's that? Who's that? Um?
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, single Dad number two, Connor b That's who
Speaker 1: I put button down shirt button shirt number three Tray
Speaker 1: Tray is yeah, okay, came about coming in hot love.
Speaker 1: Piranhas next Bachelor, Greg Greg Hope please? Greg is just
Speaker 1: Aaron Rodgers, James right villain Gabriel, the fucking magician, magician.
Speaker 1: He's gonna be like, there's a there's a dove, and
Speaker 1: then he's gonna set the house. That's right. But they
Speaker 1: said don't look over there, don't look over there, don't
Speaker 1: look over there, don't look over there. Drunk in the
Speaker 1: first night, the motivational speaker Carl is gonna be fucking shit,
Speaker 1: can like, do you want a drink? And then he's
Speaker 1: gonna get chip can thirsty ist my day, sir My
Speaker 1: dancer from Reno, Marty and Craig. Craig is the district
Speaker 1: attorney from fucking and Drew. All right, I'm warning Sammy
Speaker 1: in the booth that I know I Sammy, I know
Speaker 1: I forced you to make your picks, and uh did
Speaker 1: you make them? Because at some point at the end,
Speaker 1: I might ask for your picks just to see. I'm curious.
Speaker 1: I want to know what your picks are? Is that?
Speaker 1: Are you willing to play the game of us? I've
Speaker 1: been really busy. Okay, that's fine. What do you mean
Speaker 1: doing doing what? Doing what? Okay? That's fine, fair enough?
Speaker 1: I respect you have one more category. The f FBI
Speaker 1: Most Wanted list, and I put Hunter on. Which one?
Speaker 1: Which one is Hunter? Hunter is the one that kills
Speaker 1: people in the Oh yeah yeah, yeah, yeah yeah yeah,
Speaker 1: I got it. Okay, great, Okay. Up next is Paget.
Speaker 1: All right, here we go, Top three in order. Michael,
Speaker 1: Which one is Michael? Oh single that single day? David
Speaker 1: David Okay, David boyband loves in sink, I love. I
Speaker 1: think he's great for her. Connor be Connor by button
Speaker 1: down uton button shirt. Next Bachelor Michael, He's not gonna
Speaker 1: win it, Michael Villain, Jeff Jeff is who I don't
Speaker 1: remember who Jeff is, but I Jeff see he's like
Speaker 1: he's just okay, No, I think okay, he's getting drunk
Speaker 1: on the first night. Brandon Brandon the hair, the hair
Speaker 1: his hair or Brendan No wait, Brandon with a hair? Yeah,
Speaker 1: ruk thirstiest I said Landon, but I think I meant Jeff. Okay,
Speaker 1: who's landing Landon is? I don't Oh, he's the believer Christmas.
Speaker 1: I'n't gonna keep our eye on Brendan. He might be
Speaker 1: a pain. He's the one that's Fachinelli. I'm not I'm
Speaker 1: not completely trust I think thirsty you Canadian. I think
Speaker 1: villain and thirsty. Is it is going to be Jeff okay, great?
Speaker 1: And Craig Cray. Who's Who's Craig Cray? I'll go I'll
Speaker 1: go with the jigglow again. Great, okay, great? Jeff is
Speaker 1: I love Jeff. Jeff is television. Jeff is going to
Speaker 1: be She's gonna be a sweet like local guy, Like
Speaker 1: I think he's gonna be a sweet and I don't
Speaker 1: feel like about myself. I think Jeff's gound be like
Speaker 1: a good guy, loves his family and like, you know,
Speaker 1: he's not enjoying my mother's homemade cooking. Oh shitty, was
Speaker 1: the Italian. Yeah you like Joe Pesci? Yeah, God damn it.
Speaker 1: I have to change my dad. Just's dad. So we
Speaker 1: had a bachelor contestant who was so sweet and his
Speaker 1: mama died when he was in high school and they
Speaker 1: go home to hometown and his dad was not he
Speaker 1: was just like it was just me. He was a
Speaker 1: local swarman and he was dismissive of Dean and like
Speaker 1: there was a woman behind. So it was it was
Speaker 1: just it was tough. We all wanted to give Dean
Speaker 1: a hug. Good Dean that you're so angry with me.
Speaker 1: I just want to eat my mum beans and sit
Speaker 1: on it, sit on a pillow. And he was talking
Speaker 1: about how his new wife is his best wife. My
Speaker 1: new wife, he's my best friend. It was tough. It
Speaker 1: was tough. And then and then he was dude, Nick Vayale,
Speaker 1: he was a bachelor. It was because she was like
Speaker 1: she seemed like kind of enemy. But then I was like, wait,
Speaker 1: what he's like he's always trying to hold back up
Speaker 1: a huge grin because he knows he's super cute, and
Speaker 1: he's like, this is like weird, my pants are just tight.
Speaker 1: There he's been on board. He was like the Bachelor
Speaker 1: like four times. Okay, here we go, Doug, you take
Speaker 1: it home, land the plane for Rookie of the take
Speaker 1: it Hu, take it, huh take it, take it home.
Speaker 1: I mean call your bookie after I say all these
Speaker 1: because this is a chance to really clean up. Um
Speaker 1: my top three. See, my instincts on these things are bad.
Speaker 1: So me too. So I want my instincts in almost
Speaker 1: every category just to just to finally get something right.
Speaker 1: So so my top three number one is Kyle Hyle. Yeah, Kyle,
Speaker 1: number one. He's gonna surprise everybody. Okay, great, Then Connor
Speaker 1: b is my number two, I think is somebody else's
Speaker 1: number two as well. And then for number three, another
Speaker 1: kind of unexpected one, you know, but I wrote it down,
Speaker 1: so I guess it's gonna happen. Brandon brand I went
Speaker 1: Brandon number three, like you know, he's crazy enough to
Speaker 1: get close. But you know, why would anybody? I love
Speaker 1: this Brandon with the hair? Where the hair? That No,
Speaker 1: because there's another Brandon. There's a Brendan. Okay, use your
Speaker 1: microphone voice. Brendon has the hair. Okay, next Bachelor, Uh, Mike,
Speaker 1: Mike is not going to be the next Bachelor. And
Speaker 1: then I've got her filling. I'm going with Josh and
Speaker 1: then yeah, Josh oh yeah, okay, okay. Josh is the
Speaker 1: one that's clearly going to be like an hour and
Speaker 1: a half. Josh is the one that wears the Dalmatian
Speaker 1: code and he says he's hated Dalmatian since they killed
Speaker 1: his mother. Drunk on the first night. Is going to
Speaker 1: be Andrew. I think we can agree on that and
Speaker 1: around the district attorney, and I think Thirsty and Craig
Speaker 1: Craig need to go hand in hand. No, not always.
Speaker 1: So I'm going Gabriel, Gabriel. I think Gabriel is really
Speaker 1: gonna run the gamut. And there you have it, ladies
Speaker 1: and gentlemen. There you go to beat the boat, you guys.
Speaker 1: That's our show. Can I just say I'm in? I
Speaker 1: just want to once again thank Dynasty typewriter Is one
Speaker 1: more time. They're the greatest. Thank you to Tanna and
Speaker 1: Katie for all of your hard work over the years.
Speaker 1: It literally would not exist without you, guys. And you
Speaker 1: work so hard. And if anybody ever comes after you
Speaker 1: and reviews again, I will cut them um run a
Speaker 1: plus for all of you guys. Are you leaving? But
Speaker 1: we have, of course we have Rob Benedict, Carl Tarts,
Speaker 1: Aaron Fully, Patchet, Broster Dog Gotson, I'm art Marine. Our
Speaker 1: first episode will be up on Wednesday. You guys are
Speaker 1: the best. Thank you for buying the merch. You can
Speaker 1: get your merch at home. If you're wearing your merch,
Speaker 1: take a picture of yourself here, or take a picture
Speaker 1: of yourself watching the show online. Put it on Twitter,
Speaker 1: um and tag us, or put it on Instagram on
Speaker 1: your main feet and tag us. And I'm going to
Speaker 1: send a full influencer box with a puzzle of the bag,
Speaker 1: assigned book, the box, all of it shipped to you.
Speaker 1: You guys are the best. Welcome back. Oh yeah, I'm
Speaker 1: gonna get all up tonight. I just got one of
Speaker 1: the bus. When you read this rule, of these rules
Speaker 1: to your words world, will you accept this? Rose is
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