Speaker 1: Behold. I am Bethseda, a giant worm like creature that
Speaker 1: lives at the bottom of a muddy hole. And this
Speaker 1: is my podcast on the surface, where I try to
Speaker 1: make sense of the world above with help from human
Speaker 1: experts and my sidekick, a cool team that fell down.
Speaker 1: My whole cool team. Say something. I'm kind of missing
Speaker 1: my previous life today. It would have from my ticks
Speaker 1: in the wall of the hole, it would have been
Speaker 1: my birthday. Well that's too bad anyway. Today's topic is parenting.
Speaker 1: What is it? Where is it doesn't smell? Hopefully we'll
Speaker 1: find out from our guests. First, from characters, welcome, don't
Speaker 1: know what that is? Justin Tyler, Justin Diggs for coming
Speaker 1: down to the hole. Pleasure. This is one of the
Speaker 1: deeper holes I've ever been in. Pretty sweet to be here.
Speaker 1: Thank you, Oh, thank you. That's very nice for me
Speaker 1: to say. I'm blushing. And then from the Instagram Mommy Pickles,
Speaker 1: We've got Meg Shaw Meg. We're psyched to have you here.
Speaker 1: I am so excited to be here in a hole
Speaker 1: with you. Oh, thank you, began I thought, yea brighter, Yeah,
Speaker 1: you should see it though. When it's not high noon,
Speaker 1: it gets dark in here real quick. Oh yeah, ten.
Speaker 1: You know, the sweet spot is really between eleven fifty
Speaker 1: and twelve ten. That's when this place really gets good lighting.
Speaker 1: The rest of it not so much. But we make
Speaker 1: two alright, so let's get into it. Uh, Meg, justin,
Speaker 1: you're both parents. Justin you're a dad and Meg you're
Speaker 1: a mom. Correct? Correct, Yes, that is correct. Not together,
Speaker 1: not together, not together. We have separate, separate kids, separate kids. Wow,
Speaker 1: this means literally nothing to me, but we'll figure it out.
Speaker 1: You know, Um, how would you to define parenting? Well,
Speaker 1: it's like, um, you're raising you have a kid, a child,
Speaker 1: which is like a smaller version of you and your
Speaker 1: partner mashed up together, up together. Absolutely, they're born, and
Speaker 1: then you sort of raise them to be, um, how
Speaker 1: you want them to be in the world. Okay, s
Speaker 1: it's a very sort of narcissistic thing and people do
Speaker 1: when they're obsessed with themselves. Is that it? Many? Yes?
Speaker 1: I mean this cool teen is is a kid. Yeah,
Speaker 1: it's like a cool teen is in the middle of
Speaker 1: this metamorphosis from kid to adult. You have a parent?
Speaker 1: Are you a child? You have parents? Cool tean, you've
Speaker 1: never said anything? Oh, really you. Well, usually when i'm crying,
Speaker 1: that's who I'm thinking about because I really miss them.
Speaker 1: I'm what they call a change of life baby. So
Speaker 1: my siblings are much much older than me. They have
Speaker 1: families of their own. But yeah, I'm the youngest of seven. Wow. Yeah, Wow,
Speaker 1: your parents were busy? Oh you Yeah. I don't know
Speaker 1: what that means, but it sounds funny. Well, let me
Speaker 1: tell you. I'm more confused when we started about this
Speaker 1: parenting thing. So why don't we hop into our first
Speaker 1: segment that I'm calling what in the bood? Is this? Alright,
Speaker 1: so here's how it works. Okay, I'm gonna present you
Speaker 1: with some words related to parenting. I'll take a guess
Speaker 1: at what they mean, okay, and then you can correct
Speaker 1: me if needed. Cool, cool, alright, great, let's get into it. Okay, alright,
Speaker 1: first word we got here is crib. Okay, So to me,
Speaker 1: this appears to be like a cage, similar to the
Speaker 1: one the government tried to trap me into study me.
Speaker 1: It's a long story. Is that what a crib is? Meg?
Speaker 1: Is that a crib a good definition? I mean pretty much,
Speaker 1: it's an enclosed space. You want to just make sure
Speaker 1: your child doesn't leave, but it's usually by the child sleeps. Okay,
Speaker 1: So it's like a baby jail for sleeping, but like
Speaker 1: a nice jail. A nice jail, it has a roof
Speaker 1: like it's open on the top, if that helps. It's
Speaker 1: opened on the top much like a hole. It is
Speaker 1: a bit like a hole. It is. It's like a
Speaker 1: rectangular hole. All right, I can get down with that. Also,
Speaker 1: I don't know if you guys know this, because I'm
Speaker 1: not sure if you're up on the selang, but but
Speaker 1: tells the crib is also a rapper's house. Wow. A
Speaker 1: rapper can't wait to figure out what that is. And
Speaker 1: oftentimes you you can put like a mobile above the crib,
Speaker 1: which is like a little entertainment for the baby sleeping
Speaker 1: in the crib. They can look up and see like
Speaker 1: a little like moon going around or whatever. Wow. So
Speaker 1: these babies are stupid, yes, pretty easily entertained and stupid. Okay.
Speaker 1: Mobile is like a like a junior TV. And so
Speaker 1: you you start them because they are a little less
Speaker 1: said that they're dumb. They're just unfamiliar with the world. Useless.
Speaker 1: They're developing, they're developing. Surely you were a young worm
Speaker 1: that didn't know about all the deepest holes. Oh yeah,
Speaker 1: you know you see so, I mean we'll say this obviously.
Speaker 1: I know what worm babies are. Okay, I was a
Speaker 1: worm baby. Worm babies are tiny, transparent threads about half
Speaker 1: an inch long that you abandoned as soon as they're born. Okay,
Speaker 1: I've made thousands of them. How's that different from human babies?
Speaker 1: Everything is the same except the last part. You don't
Speaker 1: abandon them. You keep that. Oh okay, but everything else
Speaker 1: is spot on. Everything else is spot on. Sorry, I
Speaker 1: don't know if this is true for for you. Where's
Speaker 1: your baby transparent? Make when you because that would be
Speaker 1: truly terrifying if you had an organ bag that you
Speaker 1: brought home or like, look at this, it's our babies.
Speaker 1: The baby. No, I mean, I mean this worm is
Speaker 1: transparent from what I can see from here. So transparent
Speaker 1: bombs have transparent babies. I have a baby that looks
Speaker 1: like me. That's smaller. Oh right, right, okay, right, right,
Speaker 1: right as what we said, yeah, you're making a little
Speaker 1: little many, you many exactly. I would also say, from
Speaker 1: the numbers perspective, seven is probably on the higher and
Speaker 1: thousands is way beyond what humans are capable. Oh yeah, well,
Speaker 1: you know, I mean I think I think cool team.
Speaker 1: You said, I'm what you call a dead beef dad,
Speaker 1: Is that right? Yeah, I did call you that. But
Speaker 1: I know I'm learning. I'm learning from you as well
Speaker 1: that you know, not all species are the same. So
Speaker 1: I don't want to judge you too hard. Okay, that's
Speaker 1: all right. I judge you all the time coding. Do
Speaker 1: you connect with any of your offspring? You know, occasionally
Speaker 1: we'll they'll they'll squirm through the hole and we'll do
Speaker 1: a plate little wave. But for the most part, you know,
Speaker 1: I can't really see what what I'm stuck in this
Speaker 1: big hole. My body is too big to move through
Speaker 1: the soil. So kind of a not fest down here.
Speaker 1: But uh yeah, no, we're not close. I guess i'd
Speaker 1: say cool teen is kind of the closest thing I
Speaker 1: have to a child. Yeah, what a beautiful I didn't
Speaker 1: realize the other extent of your relationship down here in
Speaker 1: this in the mud. Yeah, it's been quite a long time.
Speaker 1: I mean, it's interesting because but that was the it's
Speaker 1: somewhat of a parent to me. But also but that
Speaker 1: was that is like two years old. So in a way.
Speaker 1: I'm sort of a parented but that was that. It's
Speaker 1: very confusing. That's your worms only lived before. So I'm
Speaker 1: a middle aged midlife crisis. Oh that sounds fun. I'm
Speaker 1: going to write that down for a for a later
Speaker 1: after show, Row row Fruit. So I have to write
Speaker 1: with my mouth, don't have hand. But you know, parenting
Speaker 1: is really a feeling, and I think it's it's how
Speaker 1: you're feeling about the cool kid here. Do you feel loved?
Speaker 1: You feel like you want to take care of them,
Speaker 1: you want to make sure they've eaten. You're a parent,
Speaker 1: I mean coutine. I've never expressed you how I feel
Speaker 1: about you. I'm feeling a little bit vulnerable. I guess
Speaker 1: I think of cool to eve. It's sort of a slave.
Speaker 1: It's not allowed to leave. Yeah, that that lines up.
Speaker 1: I guess I got to collect a lot of sticks
Speaker 1: for but those the I I gotta figure out how
Speaker 1: to get put those up out of this hole before
Speaker 1: I'm allowed to leave. I say that tracks cool teen.
Speaker 1: What are you eating down here? For me? I want
Speaker 1: to try to parent you, because, like you know, I've
Speaker 1: got my own stuff going. But well, this is a
Speaker 1: bit of an uncomfortable topic. Actually, but you know, if
Speaker 1: things fall in the hole, I'll eat them like a barrier,
Speaker 1: a piece of grass. But you know this is sort
Speaker 1: of uncomfortable. I uh, you know, I need some protein.
Speaker 1: So you know, every once in a while, I'll dig
Speaker 1: around in the slop and off I'll find a worm.
Speaker 1: Oh what the fund? Did you just say? What the fund?
Speaker 1: Did you just say? Code? Nothing? Nothing, I'll find a grub.
Speaker 1: I'll find a grub. I'll find a grub, and I'll
Speaker 1: and I'll eat a grub. Let me tell you, so,
Speaker 1: think if another cool team falls down here, I Am
Speaker 1: going to eat them in front of you. Okay, and
Speaker 1: you're gonna have to live. Now, let's get back to
Speaker 1: let's get back to the vocal. Okay, we've got a
Speaker 1: little sidetracked. So we've got the second vocal word. Okay,
Speaker 1: so here here we got the vocal word adopt. Okay. Now,
Speaker 1: to me, this is when you grow as big as
Speaker 1: your environment. Like how I became so giant because my
Speaker 1: whole is so big. I adopted to the whole. So
Speaker 1: is that is that the same in parenting? Adopt? Um? No? Um,
Speaker 1: It sounds like you're adapting to the whole. But adopting
Speaker 1: is sort of like when you, um, you sort of
Speaker 1: bring a child into your life that wasn't there before,
Speaker 1: that maybe was looking for a parent. So is this
Speaker 1: when you steal a baby? It can that sort of
Speaker 1: I mean the baby technically it doesn't know, so it
Speaker 1: is without their consent. Yeah, okay, old fashioned adoption. Like
Speaker 1: so adoption is where you non consensually steal a baby. Okay,
Speaker 1: I'm glad, we're clear. Lotta take a baby, take a baby. Great,
Speaker 1: if we can correct one thing. It's take a baby,
Speaker 1: not steal you take the baby. Okay, absolutely, Well it's
Speaker 1: like how cool teen adopts one of your transparent babies
Speaker 1: and eats them. As we just learned moments ago, you're
Speaker 1: eating your baby. Yeah, you eating your baby, not me.
Speaker 1: I'm not eating my babies. All right, I'm twice as confused.
Speaker 1: Let's move on to the next polk I word. Okay,
Speaker 1: So next we got, oh, this is a dirty deaper? Okay,
Speaker 1: now this one I know. Okay, this is a song
Speaker 1: I used to sing when I was little. Everyone a
Speaker 1: little something like, oh dirty deaper. She was a slug,
Speaker 1: she was dirty and had no love. She ate some shot.
Speaker 1: It's no one's fault anywhere. You all know the rest.
Speaker 1: I want bother finishing it. So would you say that's
Speaker 1: the same for human as a dirty deeper? Meg? Absolutely
Speaker 1: not not even clothes. Okay, but we are familiar with
Speaker 1: that song. That's a very famous lullaby. We we humans
Speaker 1: sing to all of our children lullaby that it's a
Speaker 1: good word. Lullaby is where you say like you're like bye,
Speaker 1: you say goodbye to your kid for the night because
Speaker 1: they go to sleep and you have a fucking break,
Speaker 1: just so beautiful. No one's ever explained it that way.
Speaker 1: Maybe at the end today we'll a lullaby, both of you.
Speaker 1: It sounds like a threat when you say it, but okay,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna lullaby the living crap out of you, Josepon Meg.
Speaker 1: What's a dirty dep okay? So a dirty diaper? Diaper
Speaker 1: is you know how babies are small and they don't
Speaker 1: have all their muscles develop, so they can't really go
Speaker 1: to the bathroom, right, So we attached the bathroom to
Speaker 1: them in a way. So there's a little pad like
Speaker 1: thing which we stick on their you know area. And
Speaker 1: I've made this gross and dirty. It's not it's very cute.
Speaker 1: And then they just be in the diaper and they
Speaker 1: pope in the diaper, and if it's a poop diaper,
Speaker 1: you call it a dirty diaper. You're telling me, sure
Speaker 1: they wear short of a apper, that is to catch
Speaker 1: their pep and poopoos. What we're saying exactly, Well, we
Speaker 1: could really use those down here sort of shopping wherever
Speaker 1: there's a spot you know, yeah, yeah, it's filling up.
Speaker 1: Where would you discarded discard it? Well, normally you dig
Speaker 1: a hole. So I hate to tell you, Meg, we're
Speaker 1: in the discard right now. Oh yeah, we're in the diaper. Essentially,
Speaker 1: I recognize my son's poop smell. Oh okay, oh so
Speaker 1: so human poop also smells. That's good to know. It's
Speaker 1: a great equalizer, you know. That's yeah. You look around
Speaker 1: and you see how we're also similar in the stink
Speaker 1: that comes out of our butts. Absolutely, indeed, contine you
Speaker 1: do it? Okay over there? Yeah, I was wanting you
Speaker 1: change a poop diaper immediately, but at P diaper you
Speaker 1: leave it. You do it every two hours, you do
Speaker 1: it every p. I don't know. This is this is
Speaker 1: going to blow your mind that you're ready you're ready.
Speaker 1: I don't even think Poultine knows about that. So diapers
Speaker 1: now have a little indicator on them, and if it
Speaker 1: goes all the way up to blue means that's enough,
Speaker 1: take your kid out of the speed diaper. Kid could
Speaker 1: peel like three or four times and it's fine. Wait.
Speaker 1: See that makes sense to me because sometimes where I
Speaker 1: shove cool tins face in the mud, as soon as
Speaker 1: they turn blue, that's how I know we have to
Speaker 1: stop playing mud face. Yep, yep, same technology, same thing. Wow,
Speaker 1: that's fascinating diaper technology. Sometimes you peel a little, sometimes
Speaker 1: you peel out. You know, another great life lesson. You know,
Speaker 1: you never know how much pea is gonna come out
Speaker 1: till you pee, you know, so just buckle down and
Speaker 1: get ready for it. Somebody stits that on a pillow.
Speaker 1: Let's move one of the next folk at word. Okay,
Speaker 1: So here we have Oh this is interesting allowance. Okay,
Speaker 1: so I'm gonna say this means just like allow, like
Speaker 1: give permission, Like how I allow cool teine to cuddle
Speaker 1: with me months per month as long as he makes
Speaker 1: his body rigid and motionless like a stick. Isn't that right?
Speaker 1: Quotine Yep, getting real good at staying still because I'm
Speaker 1: craving connection. Sometimes he does a little moan and then
Speaker 1: I'm like, get off of me, no questions, no question.
Speaker 1: Is that what allowance means? To be clear, it's not
Speaker 1: a it's not a sexual moan. I'm moaning for my
Speaker 1: missing Well I'm missing I'm missing my parents. Okay, yeah,
Speaker 1: this is definitely not a better child relationship. I think
Speaker 1: that back. Okay, cool, So what is allowance in the
Speaker 1: world of kids? What's your kids get to a certain age? Um,
Speaker 1: they want to buy stuff, and often they want to
Speaker 1: buy a lot of things, toys, cookies, they're not investing.
Speaker 1: But allowances the money that parents will often give to
Speaker 1: a kid for like chores, which is work they do
Speaker 1: around the house, um, or just being generally good. You
Speaker 1: reward them with money. Okay, well, interesting, So kids are
Speaker 1: sort of your employees, what might say, in some ways,
Speaker 1: and we're propping up capitalist society that we've all come up,
Speaker 1: and so we bring those lessons in our home, thereby
Speaker 1: getting a system that is leaving a lot of people behind. Well,
Speaker 1: I sorry, I spaced out for all of that. Sorry,
Speaker 1: I just saw a nice little juicy thing of soil
Speaker 1: that I haven't sucked on and passed through my whole body.
Speaker 1: But it sounds fascinating. I'm sure our listeners will understand
Speaker 1: what you're saying. Allowance. That's like you wanting that soil
Speaker 1: and then um, like if you had to pay cool
Speaker 1: Team for some of your mud. Oh okay, that would
Speaker 1: be you would need money. Cool Team does everything I
Speaker 1: want without getting paid. What would that be called marriage? Marriage? Zing?
Speaker 1: That was a read. I believe that was a zinger. Well,
Speaker 1: the revelation of your rigid, laydown sessions make me feel
Speaker 1: like you do have some some couple energy here. Oh god, no,
Speaker 1: that's disgusting. Oh my god. No, that would be like
Speaker 1: you having sex with like a like a cold ice
Speaker 1: cream cone or something. It's like you're just two different
Speaker 1: do absolutely different things. I probably killed myself before I
Speaker 1: add sex a cold That would be bizarre. That's now
Speaker 1: what a team needs to hear, I will say, Listen,
Speaker 1: Cool teen doesn't even have the equipment that we need. Okay, worms,
Speaker 1: it's all about like we've got some We've got some
Speaker 1: ririfices on our sides. Yeah that that excrete sperm and
Speaker 1: eggs and yeah, I've only got one set of going ads.
Speaker 1: I learned that in this sex episode. But I will
Speaker 1: add this rejection to my wall of rejections. There's another
Speaker 1: one in the no column. No one has ever said
Speaker 1: yes to me yet. But that's pretty cool. Yeah, we
Speaker 1: got a lot of yes no columns down here with
Speaker 1: scratches and it. It's kind of all that keeps cool
Speaker 1: team saying yeah, that's cool. Yeah. Do you let your
Speaker 1: kids draw on the walls like that? I mean, I
Speaker 1: used my walls to like, you're out all my kid
Speaker 1: is but fun ritual? Yeah, a ritual okay, nice? Yeah,
Speaker 1: a ritual is what rich people do to keep track
Speaker 1: of stuff. I think that might have been a ju
Speaker 1: no no no that I don't know. You don't know fails,
Speaker 1: that's true, I don't know. All right now I feel insecure.
Speaker 1: We're gonna go into this next VOLC word. Okay, here
Speaker 1: we go. Okay, this next one is epidural. Do you
Speaker 1: want to take a guess at what this is? Cool?
Speaker 1: Teen epidural epic dural? Oh man, it's like an epic,
Speaker 1: just a totally epic time that the duration of which
Speaker 1: was really long. It's just a cool night out. Any
Speaker 1: cool person would know that's what epidural means. She's like,
Speaker 1: oh man, this weekend was a total epidural. You know,
Speaker 1: just so many girls that they're freaking epidural. Hell yeah, nice.
Speaker 1: So I'm guessing that's correct, right, evaderal Meg, do you
Speaker 1: wanna take this one? I think this one. I know
Speaker 1: that it's absolutely incorrect. Okay, yeah. Epidural is basically a
Speaker 1: medication that you take to is the pain of labor.
Speaker 1: Oh so birth is painful for human Oh it's extremely
Speaker 1: painful because all your basically are Do you know what
Speaker 1: a vagina is? Yeah? We did. We talked about sex
Speaker 1: and things. Um, you know, cool teen had a magazine
Speaker 1: in his backpack when he fell down here, so I've
Speaker 1: gotten to see lots of vaginas, lots of penises, nipples
Speaker 1: of all shorts. I find it boring, to be quite frank,
Speaker 1: but cool teen really likes it beautiful. That's fair. So
Speaker 1: pop quiz, cool teen, how big is a vagina? Like?
Speaker 1: If you had to measure it in centimeters? How big
Speaker 1: do you think the whole is? Okay, cool teen, You've
Speaker 1: got some experience measuring whole, so let's yeah. Yeah, I'd
Speaker 1: say it's like the same as a nostril. Okay, okay,
Speaker 1: I mean I don't I don't know if I would
Speaker 1: feel comfortable. I'm having an answer for this question either.
Speaker 1: So I'm glad, cool teens on the spot. That's all right,
Speaker 1: we can leave it. We can leave it to Meg. Meg.
Speaker 1: You put it out there, you finish it up. Put
Speaker 1: it out there. And I had to see it through
Speaker 1: so so you know nots was maybe like half centimeter.
Speaker 1: So to pop a baby out, it has to expand
Speaker 1: to ten centimeters. Wow, no, exactly. So they pumped some
Speaker 1: epidural in you so you don't feel the pain and
Speaker 1: you can just pop it out. Okay. So this is
Speaker 1: sort of like when I used to move through the
Speaker 1: soil because I wasn't so gigantic. When I would accidentally
Speaker 1: swallow a rock, right, it would go down all my
Speaker 1: segments and then I would shoot it out. That was
Speaker 1: not fun. Yeah right, same right. So it's like shoot
Speaker 1: a rock. I wouldn't want a doctor to say that
Speaker 1: me or my partner, but yes, I guess it is.
Speaker 1: Let's let's move on to this next vocab word. Okay,
Speaker 1: here we got okay, placenta pills. Okay, this one's interesting.
Speaker 1: So I actually did know a placenta once. She was
Speaker 1: all one hole over a neighbor, if you will. So,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna guess pills that belong to placenta. Are you
Speaker 1: saying you knew a more named placenta. Her name was pacenta.
Speaker 1: Beautiful name, beautiful name short list on a lot of
Speaker 1: human naming lists. Yeah, oh perfect, So I got it right. No,
Speaker 1: I want I want justin to think this. Okay, great,
Speaker 1: I could do this. I can do this. Placenta that's
Speaker 1: the sort of sack that a baby um is grown in. Well,
Speaker 1: and well, well, the placenta actually sort of feeds the
Speaker 1: baby in the sort of larger amnionic sack, and when
Speaker 1: the water breaks, a bunch of fluid comes out and
Speaker 1: the plates center is still in there, um sort of
Speaker 1: feeding the baby. Then the baby comes out shooting a
Speaker 1: rock like we've established as normal birthing term birthing rock,
Speaker 1: and the placenta then comes out afterwards as what's called
Speaker 1: it after birth, and um, it's sort of like a
Speaker 1: shriveled up bag raisin esque. If I can throw that
Speaker 1: out there, and then placenta pills are some people you
Speaker 1: can some people just eat the placenta like, uh, like
Speaker 1: a steak. Oh my god, what like a very fine steak.
Speaker 1: I'll take a medium rare. Yeah, it comes out pretty rare,
Speaker 1: so you want to cook it a little bit. Um.
Speaker 1: Some people making it the pills because they say that
Speaker 1: if you take the pills it helps with some of
Speaker 1: the hormonal changes that come after a human female gives birth.
Speaker 1: Is that correct? Because just feel like you're explained that
Speaker 1: really well, Meg, I mean, thank you for explaining that
Speaker 1: so well, justin I don't think I ever fully understood
Speaker 1: it that this moment. Yeah, but he's absolutely right. I said,
Speaker 1: that's supposed to be one of the most like nutritious
Speaker 1: part of the body after pregnancy because it has all
Speaker 1: these nutrients and minerals and all of this good stuff.
Speaker 1: But hell no, never doing that, absolutely not. Yeah. I mean,
Speaker 1: cool teens um looking their lips right now because so
Speaker 1: hungry and wants a meal like that would keep you
Speaker 1: going cool teen for weeks down here in this hole.
Speaker 1: As disgusted as I am, I am salivating at the idea. Listeners,
Speaker 1: if you want to feed cool teen, just you know,
Speaker 1: come up to the edge of the hole tossing your trash.
Speaker 1: I'm honestly getting sick of them complaining. If you've got
Speaker 1: a placenta from that stucker down here, I want to
Speaker 1: hear that splat right on the floor, you know, and
Speaker 1: then your jinkin eat it and then you'll stop eating worms. Sorry, sorry, well,
Speaker 1: I actually I actually have on the topic of food,
Speaker 1: I have a question about a word. Yeah, what do
Speaker 1: you I think this is the type of salad that
Speaker 1: my mom gets at the nine restaurant as a caesar
Speaker 1: caesary in interesting Oh is that the French pronunciation? Yeah,
Speaker 1: it's French food. Yeah, French doctor. Um, it's amazing. But
Speaker 1: you know this is what your sixth question, and congratulations
Speaker 1: you're wrong again. Oh damn. You know what's funny is
Speaker 1: we haven't gotten one right to date. Let me ask
Speaker 1: you what's the process? Like? Have you come up with
Speaker 1: a term and then you just both of you work
Speaker 1: together randomly guessing what it might mean? Absolutely see cooltine Cootine.
Speaker 1: We have established does have a phone down here. The
Speaker 1: service is not good, but occasionally, you know, occasionally we
Speaker 1: can get in there and kind of find some words.
Speaker 1: But I prefer to hear it from the source. You know,
Speaker 1: I've heard the internet is not trustworthy. Yeah, unreliable. So
Speaker 1: you know, cool Teine will will google, so they say,
Speaker 1: sound like you just learned that word right in this moment,
Speaker 1: they'll be like parent words, you know, and then and
Speaker 1: then also search boobies kind of just like, oh the time,
Speaker 1: it's weird. They're not able to get that many things
Speaker 1: about parenting, but boobies are just like, yeah, we got
Speaker 1: hundreds of them. Well, but fells, I know we haven't
Speaker 1: taught you about cell phone service yet, but there's a
Speaker 1: thing where, um, you know, text files are really really big,
Speaker 1: and image and video files actually really small and easy
Speaker 1: to get. Oh, okay, that makes sense, total sense. Do
Speaker 1: you have another word, cote, do you want to ask
Speaker 1: a mom? Okay, I think this happened to me when
Speaker 1: I got bit by that mole and a weasel. Yeah, placenta,
Speaker 1: placenta bit you right, yeah yeah, plasenter the mole and
Speaker 1: yourerethra of the weasel. They both bit me, and I
Speaker 1: think that's the measles. Is that correct? Oh my god,
Speaker 1: you know what? Yes, Oh we got on my wow,
Speaker 1: I am so thrilled we got one right. If you
Speaker 1: said it was wrong, it would absolutely break my heart.
Speaker 1: Bucked right up to the line. Let them have this.
Speaker 1: It might be measles. You could definitely have measles. Cool.
Speaker 1: All right? Yeah, well, I guess measles are cool. Anything
Speaker 1: that happens to me is cool. Maybe maybe I'm sorry
Speaker 1: your parents didn't give you the MMR shot when you
Speaker 1: were little. Are you anti vax? No? No, no, no,
Speaker 1: just being number seven out of seven? A lot of
Speaker 1: things fall through the cracks. What's anti vax? What's that mean?
Speaker 1: Whether their measles is something that you get vaccinated for
Speaker 1: because it's a disease you don't want to get. Some
Speaker 1: people don't get these vaccines. Um, so they're anti vacs? Interesting, right, Okay?
Speaker 1: I mean I understand like wanting some diseases and not others.
Speaker 1: Some diseases I find delicious. Really yeah, you know which
Speaker 1: diseases are you yeming? All right? I love lead poisoning
Speaker 1: in the soil tastes good. I like um sewage run off.
Speaker 1: I call that a work yesterday with a bad case
Speaker 1: of sewage run off. So I totally get it, you
Speaker 1: know what. I get it to my friend. But you
Speaker 1: know what, sometimes when it's a Friday night, you know what,
Speaker 1: I'm bored and I want to get a little cookie,
Speaker 1: you know, I'll take some of that sewage run off,
Speaker 1: and yeah, it's like a fountain from both ends, my friends. Wow, sorry,
Speaker 1: is it weird that I'm talking about this? I mean,
Speaker 1: we're parents of You've seen cook come out of all
Speaker 1: places exactly, lots of seeing poop as a parent, okay, yeah, leakage,
Speaker 1: a lot of leakage diapers. While the diaper technology is cool,
Speaker 1: it's better there, mistakes are still made, all right, you
Speaker 1: know what those done? Maybe we are each other's parents. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I'm kind of feeling like maybe we are because there's
Speaker 1: so much ship down here. It's so much it's like
Speaker 1: a ship pool. Anyway, Okay, I think I'm sort of
Speaker 1: getting what parenting is. But I want to do another
Speaker 1: segment real quick, just to really like nail it down.
Speaker 1: So let's go into segment too that I'm calling parenting
Speaker 1: or not parenting. So okay, I'm gonna give you some
Speaker 1: scenarios written by us as well as our listeners, and
Speaker 1: I just need you to tell me if they are
Speaker 1: parenting or not parenting. Okay, okay, good, all right? First up,
Speaker 1: putting kids in time out parenting or not parenting, parenting,
Speaker 1: parenting strong, that's strong, parenting great? Oh, changing diapers. I
Speaker 1: think we talked about this. I'm going to go ahead
Speaker 1: and say parenting, big time parenting, big time parenting. Alright, great,
Speaker 1: all right? How about this one? Allowing the two parasites
Speaker 1: attached to my back to slowly suck the life out
Speaker 1: of me because they're just so din cute. Parenting or
Speaker 1: not parenting. Parent often refer to my children as parasites
Speaker 1: sucking the blood out of my back. Oh wow, perfect, great,
Speaker 1: all right? Yeah, I mean I literally, like, as a mom,
Speaker 1: give birth to my parasites, so he has all my
Speaker 1: organs and blood. Wow, that's I'm gonna be honest. I
Speaker 1: smoked a little weed before this, and that's kind of
Speaker 1: freaking me out. Someone dropped to joint down here, and
Speaker 1: he's not just stucking on my blood, but I provided
Speaker 1: the original blood that allowed him to stop the succession
Speaker 1: of blood that comes with it. Now you're gonna throw up,
Speaker 1: you know when we were talking about the centa, I'm
Speaker 1: just so hungry. Or also all the ship we're physically in. Listen,
Speaker 1: when you sit and ship long enough, it stops smelling. Yeah,
Speaker 1: put that on another pillow. Yeah, okay, you really know
Speaker 1: how to make the best of a ship situation here, Um,
Speaker 1: let me ask you about that joint the felon cool teen.
Speaker 1: How did you lose out on the joint type of
Speaker 1: Fell's death? Oh? Man, I smoked. Here's the thing is
Speaker 1: that I smoked so much weed that I forgot kind
Speaker 1: of smoke weed or what it looked like. Look, I'll
Speaker 1: sum it up. They put the lid end in their
Speaker 1: mouth and then I had to take it away from them. Yeah,
Speaker 1: that's parenting right there. Yeah, is parenting? All right? Good? Yeah,
Speaker 1: all right? We got a couple more scenarios. When you
Speaker 1: help a turtle cross the street, parenting or not parenting,
Speaker 1: very frustrated parenting. Yes, it's like seven seconds of parenting
Speaker 1: and okay, a little quick parenting if you just wanta
Speaker 1: a dash of it, all right, And this is this
Speaker 1: is my last one. I gotta feeding, clothing and sheltering
Speaker 1: a clumsy teen that I'm not related to parenting or
Speaker 1: not parenting. I feel like we've talked about this, but
Speaker 1: I'm kinda still on the fence. I mean, I don't
Speaker 1: feel comfortable answering that question because I feel like there's
Speaker 1: more than those three words that you just said. So
Speaker 1: I don't know if this is a parenting relationship or
Speaker 1: a really dysfunctional marriage. So I'm gonna I'm gonna bleed
Speaker 1: the fifth on this one. What are some other words
Speaker 1: that you do other than feeding, clothing and sheltering, changing
Speaker 1: the diappers, giving them your organs, eating the sack they
Speaker 1: were bushed in. We gotta what else? Measuring them? Am
Speaker 1: I missing anything? That's a that's a lot of what
Speaker 1: it is? That's a lot. Yeah, you're just keeping them alive,
Speaker 1: that's really the goal. And then later you're talking to them,
Speaker 1: like guiding them through life decisions, and then eventually ideally
Speaker 1: they sort of take care of you as you get old. Okay,
Speaker 1: See that makes perfect sense to me. I feel like
Speaker 1: I've got a good grasp from parenting. Cootine, Did you
Speaker 1: have any scenarios you wanted to josh out there. Yeah,
Speaker 1: Let's say let's say somebody asks their dad what sex
Speaker 1: is and he says, your mother's least favorite thing is
Speaker 1: that parenting? That's really bad? Sense of you are? I
Speaker 1: think that's there's a little bit of parenting in there
Speaker 1: that's bad parenting, but it's still parenting. You never talked
Speaker 1: down your spouse in front of your child. Oh okay,
Speaker 1: I love that. I think that's a great rule. Yeah,
Speaker 1: what else you got? Um when when your kid asked
Speaker 1: you for something and you say, I don't know, ask
Speaker 1: your mother. And then you're the mother and your kid
Speaker 1: ask you something and I said, I don't know, ask
Speaker 1: your father, and the kid just kind of ends up
Speaker 1: just wasting away on a Saturday with nothing to do
Speaker 1: because no permission was given. Is that parenting? That's a
Speaker 1: game of cool teen ping pong right there, and that's
Speaker 1: how you end up in a hole. Oh nice, I've
Speaker 1: never heard of cool teen ping pong. We just have
Speaker 1: mud clot and mud faced down. You don't get any
Speaker 1: ideas mud ball. We got red mud, redbud, come over,
Speaker 1: come over. Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's a favorite of mine.
Speaker 1: I don't want to hear about red mud. It's just iron.
Speaker 1: It's just the iron deposits in the soil. Well, let
Speaker 1: me tell you. When I shout that rock out, there
Speaker 1: was red mud like you've never seen before. Anyway, And
Speaker 1: we're getting too graphic here. Any others, cool team before
Speaker 1: we move on? Yeah, how about when your mom passes out?
Speaker 1: On the couch and you take a lit cigarette out
Speaker 1: of her mouth and put a blanket over her softly.
Speaker 1: Is that parenting? You're the parent? Yeah, you're your parents,
Speaker 1: chanting your parents. Okay, that's what I'm sad. Okay, well
Speaker 1: just one more coolting? Can I just say something? You're
Speaker 1: you're bombing us out hard, but keep going. Uh? What
Speaker 1: about when your kid goes missing and so you file
Speaker 1: a missing person's report, probably, and you have a big
Speaker 1: press conference probably, and there's a big search party probably
Speaker 1: that gets the whole community involved. But when the missing
Speaker 1: kid doesn't turn up, you realize at a certain point
Speaker 1: that you have to go on with your life and
Speaker 1: take care of your children. Whose whereabouts you do know?
Speaker 1: Is that parenting? Where did you hear that? Where did
Speaker 1: you hear that? Coold sorry cooing sobbing water? You're making
Speaker 1: so much more mud. No, I don't, I don't know.
Speaker 1: I don't know for sure that those things happened. I
Speaker 1: was just kind of it was conjecture that maybe there was,
Speaker 1: you know, a really big search party, and people were
Speaker 1: really worried, and now maybe nobody's coming to find that
Speaker 1: that missing kid. Because I mean, I mean I watched
Speaker 1: the news that I'm very active on social media. I
Speaker 1: haven't seen anything, so I don't think anyone's looking. Coutine.
Speaker 1: I told you there's no use, you know, but one
Speaker 1: day we'll get to the surface, you and I as
Speaker 1: long as you take me with you, otherwise I will
Speaker 1: not let you go. Yeah, okay. And a lot of
Speaker 1: people are actually celebrating sort of the fact that the
Speaker 1: teen is sort of out there. Wo, that's right. The
Speaker 1: family was so strained, right financially, I think they're they're
Speaker 1: kind of breathing a sigh of relief. Yeah, that's true.
Speaker 1: I didn't read about that. Huh. That's weird. But this
Speaker 1: is just a hypothetical situation we're talking about, right, yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: yea yea yeah, yeah yeah, just hypothetical. That's just that's
Speaker 1: just a hypothetical. But all I'll get building on my
Speaker 1: next experiment to get up. But fells that out of
Speaker 1: here because I know it means the world to her
Speaker 1: to get up on that surface. Cote. I feel like
Speaker 1: this has been a sad episode for you, So I
Speaker 1: am going to offer you something tonight. You can cuddle
Speaker 1: with me, and you don't have to be pharmacistic. You
Speaker 1: can be a little wiggily. But if you kiss me
Speaker 1: again on my slimy fat body, I won't. I'm gonna
Speaker 1: put your phrase in them, Okay, I won Before you escape,
Speaker 1: make sure the hole is fully dilated ten centimeters minimum,
Speaker 1: ten centimeters minimum. Oh god it that was a birth joke. Yes, well,
Speaker 1: I think I've got a good graph. So I want
Speaker 1: to move into our third segment that I'm calling for.
Speaker 1: Those looks be dirty and actually cool. Team is gonna
Speaker 1: get their belly a little dirty as well. Yeah, here's
Speaker 1: what we're gonna do. Hold on one second. Sorry, Wow,
Speaker 1: what did you have for mud lunch? Wow? I had mud.
Speaker 1: That's a rust burp ate, something rusty. Throw all kinds
Speaker 1: of ship down here. Somebody's got to eat it, you know,
Speaker 1: or it piles up. Can you like, open a window,
Speaker 1: a window, I'm in a hole. Open the skylight, that's true.
Speaker 1: I got the nicest skylight in town. All right. So
Speaker 1: this third segment, here's what we're gonna do. Meg Justin,
Speaker 1: I want you to interview me and Colteene for the
Speaker 1: position of baby sitter. Now, I'm a little concerned to
Speaker 1: sit on the baby because I do weigh the same
Speaker 1: as three two car garages. But I think it's also
Speaker 1: we're also sort of taking care of the baby. Yes,
Speaker 1: we're like a sort of subbing in for the parent
Speaker 1: is all right, that's right. It's not a physical description, really,
Speaker 1: it's more of a sort of a role perfect. Okay,
Speaker 1: so we're gonna interview. We're gonna put some tense music on,
Speaker 1: and then I want you to interview me and Coltine.
Speaker 1: Ask us some questions that you would ask a babysitter.
Speaker 1: All right, let's get into it where we got all right,
Speaker 1: what pasta experience do you have with kids? Oh? For sure,
Speaker 1: I have one trap to my whole. I don't feed
Speaker 1: him or really shelter him, but we play games. I
Speaker 1: let him cuddle me sometimes. And uh, let's see, I
Speaker 1: guess other than cool teen, I have never seen another
Speaker 1: child in my whole life. Justin who are you? Who
Speaker 1: are you talking? Sorry? My children had are here? Now
Speaker 1: what they Yeah? They so you can see some like parenting.
Speaker 1: Oh my god, almost in person. Here, Oh my god, hello,
Speaker 1: child come here, come here. No you don't want to. Well,
Speaker 1: I'm teaching them some people about parenting. I told them
Speaker 1: not to follow me to the whole. But kids, you know,
Speaker 1: they don't listen. You don't listen if they're scared to
Speaker 1: come down here. I don't blame him. I'm terrified every
Speaker 1: waking moment in my life. You are the villain of
Speaker 1: a lot of story books. Technically, I see one, I
Speaker 1: see one. I see a child. Yes, it's too small
Speaker 1: to help me. Oh my gosh, what a beautiful creature.
Speaker 1: She's so cute. What a beautiful Oh it's like a
Speaker 1: mini you, but but even more beautiful. This is a
Speaker 1: compliments that I love hearing. Let me be honest. Did
Speaker 1: I not mention I'm attracted to everybody, exact kids. I'm
Speaker 1: gonna drige you to kids. I do want to say
Speaker 1: that everyone but cool teen. It seems like everyone contains
Speaker 1: a minor Okay, I'm not a pervert, all right, I'm
Speaker 1: not a perfect worm that likes kids. I'm a perfect
Speaker 1: worm that likes humans. Coteen, what's your experience? Well, you know,
Speaker 1: like I said, I'm the youngest, so I didn't have
Speaker 1: a lot of siblings around a babysit. But you know,
Speaker 1: at the camp that I was at before I sunk
Speaker 1: in the whole, I was a c I t a
Speaker 1: counselor in training. Is that an important position? Yeah, yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: Wait what's a c I t a counselor in training.
Speaker 1: So I'm not technically a counselor because I'm not old enough,
Speaker 1: but I am watching over the really little kids, and
Speaker 1: I will say I was famous for being the strictest,
Speaker 1: one of the most cool features a councilor and training
Speaker 1: can have. Oh I'm sorry, Coltine, I think that is
Speaker 1: an uncool I think, I mean, maybe you got that wrong,
Speaker 1: being strict, but not from the parents vantage point like
Speaker 1: I would. I'm here for it like I would like
Speaker 1: a discipline structured babysitter. Okay, alright, so Colltine, I think
Speaker 1: that's one to you. I think you got me beat there.
Speaker 1: I think you've got more experience with kids. Let's do
Speaker 1: the next question justin you got one? Yes, um, what
Speaker 1: kind of meals do you like to prepare for children?
Speaker 1: For children? Let's see? Oh? What can I make? What
Speaker 1: can I make? Dirt? I can make dirt, Alla dirt
Speaker 1: if you will. I can make um eggs, eggs And
Speaker 1: by that, of course, I mean my eggs filled with
Speaker 1: tiny baby worms. I haven't eaten them, but Cootine seems
Speaker 1: to find them. Delicious. Yeah, yeah, very good. I think
Speaker 1: Other than that, I don't know, maybe like a casserole ship.
Speaker 1: I don't know what a cas is. I'm sorry, I'm lying.
Speaker 1: I gotta I don't got a good answer to this one. Well,
Speaker 1: you know, I think I actually would cook cast role
Speaker 1: because as far as I understand that, casserole is where
Speaker 1: you just um put a bunch of stuff in a
Speaker 1: pot and put that pot in the oven. So I'm
Speaker 1: pretty sure I got that under control. Oh, usually you
Speaker 1: want to get a little more specific than what you
Speaker 1: just said. I don't know about that. I don't know
Speaker 1: about that. Have you had my mom's casserole? I don't
Speaker 1: think so. This hole is a bit of a casserole,
Speaker 1: if you ask me, we are all kinds of ship
Speaker 1: down here. Man. Someone dropped a lawnmower down here the
Speaker 1: other day. Pe right on me. This is a really
Speaker 1: large hole. Yeah yeah, listen, it's a big asshole and
Speaker 1: it's very deep, so you can't see me down here.
Speaker 1: You can just faintly hear our screens. But that's about it.
Speaker 1: But I mean, when we go up there, do you
Speaker 1: want to follow us? Yeah? Easier said than done. Here's
Speaker 1: the deal. I am. Maybe I haven't gotten this across.
Speaker 1: I am as big as a house, I've been told,
Speaker 1: and uh, I don't have any appendages, so I can sell.
Speaker 1: The child is back. Yes, this is the This is
Speaker 1: another child here. Say say hello, Hello, you're so beautiful.
Speaker 1: You're scaring her warm Wow, cool teen. I'm glad you're
Speaker 1: not the only child I've seen, you know, because these children, God,
Speaker 1: they're like angels. Yeah, that's just very nice. They are
Speaker 1: like angels and they don't ever do anything wrong. Right,
Speaker 1: what's that sound there? They're making a sound. What is that?
Speaker 1: Oh that's laughter. I don't know. Cool. Team doesn't never laugh?
Speaker 1: Oh okay, no, no, no, we laugh. We laugh for sure.
Speaker 1: I didn't know if it was some sort of signal
Speaker 1: of a feed me or change my diapper. And oh
Speaker 1: they climb, yes they do, this is um. They climb
Speaker 1: on all of the mud bunk bed that you have
Speaker 1: here in your hole. Oh wonderful a bunk bed. That's cool.
Speaker 1: Maybe that's one for another time. Any other questions before
Speaker 1: you decide who your babysit is going to be? Um?
Speaker 1: Do you know CPR? Like, what if there was an emergency,
Speaker 1: would you be able to help the child out. I
Speaker 1: am an expert at CPR, and by that I assume
Speaker 1: you meet um centipedes in pools of rectal fluid. I did. Actually,
Speaker 1: that's oh yeah, I can. I'm an expert at that
Speaker 1: Centerpede famously love rector fluid. Excellent rector. You say, what
Speaker 1: about your CULTI nine, I don't know anything about centipedes
Speaker 1: and pools a rectal fluid. So alright, that's a point
Speaker 1: to you. But the alright, so we were to one.
Speaker 1: I think honestly, centipedes and pulls the rector fluid is
Speaker 1: basically what we're doing right now. That might be the
Speaker 1: name of this podcast center. You know it's gonna be
Speaker 1: on the surface. But I agree, centipedes in pools of
Speaker 1: rector fluid. Maybe we can we can throw that in
Speaker 1: the title. Maybe that's like the comedians in cars drink
Speaker 1: in coffee version of this. Well, that sounds like a
Speaker 1: terrible show. People watch it. Wow, podcast burn people, that's amazing. Wow,
Speaker 1: Um suddenly not worried about my podcast doing well. I
Speaker 1: mean that would be like you saying people in holes
Speaker 1: having candles. That sounds fun. You put a candle in
Speaker 1: a hole you don't know what's gonna happen. What's flammable,
Speaker 1: what's not flammable? There's nowhere to run a lot of
Speaker 1: noxious gases. Yeah, wow, Okay, the child is back and
Speaker 1: it's climbing on Justin. It's climbing on you. Yes, this
Speaker 1: is a very common human child thing to do, climbing
Speaker 1: on data. Oh that's cute. That's a nicknamed dada. If
Speaker 1: you pretended that the hole was data, can you climb
Speaker 1: over it? It's so so deep and the walls they're
Speaker 1: so so muddy. I've tried so many times. I even
Speaker 1: tried to make a tower of all the non working
Speaker 1: microwaves that are down here, and I couldn't get to
Speaker 1: the top of it. I have a feeling that's the
Speaker 1: only way that but Belles and I are going to
Speaker 1: get out of here is together. I mean, look, I'm
Speaker 1: not I'm not mad at you, but I am disappointed,
Speaker 1: Oh that you're not doing your best parenting? Yea, was
Speaker 1: that parenting? That's parenting right there? Very disappointed in your
Speaker 1: quotin Wow, cool teen, try harder. I feel sad because
Speaker 1: of what you said, but I feel glad that you
Speaker 1: cared enough to say it. Put that on a pillow.
Speaker 1: Put that on a pillow and choke on it. No way,
Speaker 1: what sleep on it? Whoa Okay, I want to put
Speaker 1: put that on a pillow, a choke on it, on
Speaker 1: a pillow. Put that on a pillow and choke on it.
Speaker 1: Leap on it. Folks, you heard it here first. That's
Speaker 1: gonna be their new sing sweep in the Nation. Very
Speaker 1: famous quote by Max. Sleep on it, sleep on it
Speaker 1: absolutely all right. That's get another question. Um, what do
Speaker 1: you want to do outside of babysitting with your life?
Speaker 1: Good question? Wow, Like what are my dreams? I want
Speaker 1: to be? Where the people I want to? She want to?
Speaker 1: She done walking along on there? Are you calling cotine?
Speaker 1: What are you calling? Uh birkin stocks. That's fucking wrong,
Speaker 1: cotine its feet? God damn it. Well I think that
Speaker 1: pretty much sums it up. I'm so used to Cool
Speaker 1: team crying. It was wild to see you crying. Thank you. Yeah,
Speaker 1: it's crazy when worms cry because we don't have eyes.
Speaker 1: I love that Prince song. Your body is like watering
Speaker 1: right now. Like that's interesting. It's water. It's sort of like, um,
Speaker 1: you know, someone threw a sprinkler system down here once,
Speaker 1: just kind of it's just kind of shooting una everywhere,
Speaker 1: you know. Come to think of it, most of my
Speaker 1: time is spent shooting stuff out of my body. What
Speaker 1: a lifestyle. So that's what you're saying, your aspiration is
Speaker 1: as a babysitter. No, that's more of a hobby. I
Speaker 1: think my ask rage. I think my aspiration is to
Speaker 1: get to the surfish, get extreme plastic surgery. So it
Speaker 1: looked like a human wiggle my way through sex and
Speaker 1: favors and betrayal, work my way to the top of
Speaker 1: the human system and become their queen. I've trud of
Speaker 1: pretty much sums it up. Oh, I also want to
Speaker 1: be a singer, for sure. It's beautiful. I'd like to
Speaker 1: see the age of twenty. Oh good, that's a good dream.
Speaker 1: I would know you right now. Fourteen Maybe I don't know.
Speaker 1: I I think today's my fourteenth birthday. But I might
Speaker 1: have been wrong about the scratches on the wall. You know,
Speaker 1: cool teen has been down here for a while. They're
Speaker 1: kind of a permanent fixture. And if I if I'm
Speaker 1: taking my nap between eleven fifty and twelve ten, that
Speaker 1: I don't even register that another noon has passed, So
Speaker 1: I might not clock. That is two different days, and
Speaker 1: it's hard to keep track on a with scratches on
Speaker 1: a muddy wall. Yeah, especially when I have to make
Speaker 1: room for more um cave boob drawings that I'm always doing. Yes, yeah,
Speaker 1: and then some of the little hatches fill in pretty
Speaker 1: quick because again it's mud. So sorry, my child, I'm
Speaker 1: just screamed, I did poopies from the bathroom area. Oh wow,
Speaker 1: Oh that's so exciting. Thank you. I'm getting emotional. The
Speaker 1: child did poopies. I want to be a parent. I
Speaker 1: don't know what's going on. If your hobby is excreting
Speaker 1: stuff through holes, adding a child who will also do
Speaker 1: that very same thing is a great idea for you. Wow.
Speaker 1: Can we get a mic over there, justin there's some
Speaker 1: pick this up? Yeah, definitely. Well, if there's any updates
Speaker 1: on the I made poopy situation, please let us know.
Speaker 1: Interrupt whatever we're talking about. I gotta know about these poopies.
Speaker 1: When in Rome do is? When in mud do is?
Speaker 1: The mud group does? Thank you for saying that I
Speaker 1: don't know what Rome is? Alright? Any other any other
Speaker 1: questions for me? And Cooltine before you choose your babysitter, Well, cooltine,
Speaker 1: what are living to? It was the aspiration outside of davidsitting. Absolutely.
Speaker 1: I forgot briefly because it was so sad. Honestly, I
Speaker 1: think you're aiming too high or being a singer. Um, okay, colotine.
Speaker 1: I feel like you just copied my answer. No, no, no,
Speaker 1: I've said that so many times. That's a common thing
Speaker 1: that parents and children do, is the child will copy
Speaker 1: the answer from the parents. See. I hate that because
Speaker 1: I need to feel special. Yeah, then parenting is not
Speaker 1: for you, all right. You know what, I've decided. I'm
Speaker 1: never gonna be a parent. It's official. I never want
Speaker 1: a parent. I love kids, but I just don't want
Speaker 1: them to be mine. Does that make sense totally? I
Speaker 1: would say. Then, I guess you can stop blasting the
Speaker 1: thousands of transparent worm children out of your rock hole.
Speaker 1: Oh no, I'm still gonna do that for sure. Yeah,
Speaker 1: Mammy loves to blassom kids, you know. But yeah, I
Speaker 1: think I'll keep abandoning them and maybe they'll get adopt
Speaker 1: Maybe they'll get adopt. You your mom and dad both both,
Speaker 1: I'm both. I'm sort of a you know, I identify
Speaker 1: as a mud freak. Really nice to Yeah, my pronouns
Speaker 1: are let's see, Cooltine told me pronouns are how people
Speaker 1: refer to you. I guess my pronouns would be um,
Speaker 1: oh my god? What is that? And quick? Somebody kill it.
Speaker 1: That's where I'm at gender wise to say andrew your question. Yeah, alright,
Speaker 1: it's time choose your babysitter me a big worm famous
Speaker 1: for abandoning their children and shipping all over the place,
Speaker 1: or a fourteen year old who uh, I'm just gonna
Speaker 1: say it will probably kill the kid, but up to you. Wow. Well,
Speaker 1: let me throw out one final, the most important question.
Speaker 1: What's your rate? All these other questions are trash. What's
Speaker 1: your rate? Like payment? Yeah? But how much do you
Speaker 1: want to be paid per hour for watching our children?
Speaker 1: Per hour? What do I want to be paid for hour?
Speaker 1: Can we just do a lump some of get me
Speaker 1: the funk out of this hole? Okay, what about your
Speaker 1: cool teen? I'll take four bucks an hour? Damn it,
Speaker 1: cool teen? You know with babysitters what he's here at
Speaker 1: rate that low, it's almost more of a cause for concern.
Speaker 1: I'll take it. I'll take it your higher, cool Teine, Yes,
Speaker 1: thank you. I could make money off you. Absolutely. I'm
Speaker 1: a cool team too, but let's work out of schedule.
Speaker 1: Cool TEENK. Sometimes they for you and sometimes they be
Speaker 1: for me. Okay, fair, Oh'm sorry, someone just rang the
Speaker 1: whole bell. Looks like a new dumpster for trash is
Speaker 1: being delivered, and I was just saying, I love how
Speaker 1: respectful the community is that they're in a bell before
Speaker 1: they dump book stuff into your hole. You know, it's
Speaker 1: at least a good deal. That is so nice. You
Speaker 1: know you're an important part of this community, whether you
Speaker 1: know it or not. That's really beautiful way of looking
Speaker 1: at trash about to rain down on us. It's really good.
Speaker 1: Do you think I'm a part of the community. I
Speaker 1: that means so much to me. You know, you want
Speaker 1: to be where the people are, but you already are
Speaker 1: where the people are. Okay, I guess that makes sense.
Speaker 1: I mean think of it like the circle of life,
Speaker 1: you know, like this is better at all ends, and
Speaker 1: then you give it new life. Did you know I
Speaker 1: can put my whole body in a circle. I can
Speaker 1: guess my own butt. Just saying, honestly, human centipede vibes
Speaker 1: coming out of this place. It's very strong. I feel
Speaker 1: like it makes me a good babysitter. I feel like
Speaker 1: if I kissed my own butt, a kid would just
Speaker 1: do that laughter thing. I think that makes you a
Speaker 1: great one night stand interesting. All right, I'll have to
Speaker 1: I have to figure out try to google that. I'm
Speaker 1: sure just pictures of boobies will come up again. But
Speaker 1: that's some flexibility and I can well, I gotta say,
Speaker 1: I gotta say me, Justin, thank you so much for
Speaker 1: calming down into the hole. Justin. Is there anything you'd
Speaker 1: like to plug? Getting out of a hole? The any
Speaker 1: holier and get out of it? And I guess you
Speaker 1: can follow me on Twitter at j T Sizzle, a
Speaker 1: normal parents Twitter handle. That's the sound that my body
Speaker 1: makes when it gets fried by the sun, Little JT. Sizzle.
Speaker 1: That's right, classic j D Sizzle. Maggie, got anything to
Speaker 1: promote anything going on? No, just follow me on Instagram
Speaker 1: or Twitter. My handles make shop five to nine. And yeah,
Speaker 1: if you find yourself in a hole, don't give off,
Speaker 1: but just tell yourself here in a hole, it's okay. Wow,
Speaker 1: that was beautiful. That's good. Take ownership of it and
Speaker 1: check out. I do a show with someone named Sarah
Speaker 1: Smallwood parsons Um called characters welcome. Oh she sounds cool. Yes,
Speaker 1: it's cool. You can check it out on the YouTube
Speaker 1: slash characters Welcome. What do you think of her? How
Speaker 1: would you describe her? Um, she's like um, sort of
Speaker 1: a human worm like you befels. The scale tips toward worm,
Speaker 1: but its scale tips toward human on her end. Interesting. Okay,
Speaker 1: sounds like a freak if you ask me. But she's
Speaker 1: a mud freak. She's a mud freak. She's a mud freak.
Speaker 1: All right, Well, you know what any mud freaky yours
Speaker 1: is a mud freak of mine. Put that on a pedal.
Speaker 1: The child is back. Okay, well, you know what. We
Speaker 1: gotta wrap up, but I'm just gonna watch this child,
Speaker 1: do it. Think that's our episode to stay muddy? Everybody?
Speaker 1: You ain't my son, my mom, fucking step son, I
Speaker 1: don't know, don't shed but she doesn't. I didn't do them.
Speaker 1: She