1 00:00:03,200 --> 00:00:06,440 Speaker 1: Tickets to the Strawberry Letter and Star Tim. Y'all buckle 2 00:00:06,559 --> 00:00:11,120 Speaker 1: up and hold on tight. Sberry Letter three, subject cheating 3 00:00:11,440 --> 00:00:15,440 Speaker 1: boyfriend I Steve, I want your advice. My boyfriend and 4 00:00:15,440 --> 00:00:18,920 Speaker 1: I have a relationship for six years. He started cheating 5 00:00:18,920 --> 00:00:21,600 Speaker 1: on me three years ago. He had a child with 6 00:00:21,640 --> 00:00:25,560 Speaker 1: that girl, and now he's cheating again. His mother stopped 7 00:00:25,560 --> 00:00:27,560 Speaker 1: talking to me because she thought I was trying to 8 00:00:27,600 --> 00:00:30,160 Speaker 1: take her son from her. I wrote him a letter 9 00:00:30,200 --> 00:00:32,320 Speaker 1: a while back, telling him that I need him to 10 00:00:32,400 --> 00:00:35,920 Speaker 1: be a man and um that I can rely on 11 00:00:36,080 --> 00:00:38,440 Speaker 1: the man that I need to have our household, and 12 00:00:38,520 --> 00:00:40,720 Speaker 1: the only way that can happen is if you stop 13 00:00:40,760 --> 00:00:44,200 Speaker 1: allowing his mother to control him and our relationship as well. 14 00:00:44,560 --> 00:00:46,840 Speaker 1: His mother read the letter, and since then, his mother 15 00:00:46,880 --> 00:00:49,919 Speaker 1: has been out to get me. She's told millions of 16 00:00:50,000 --> 00:00:53,440 Speaker 1: lies on me. She's encouraged him to bring the girl 17 00:00:53,520 --> 00:00:56,280 Speaker 1: home even when she knew we were still together. She 18 00:00:56,360 --> 00:00:58,320 Speaker 1: even told me to stay away from her son and 19 00:00:58,320 --> 00:01:01,120 Speaker 1: stopped coming between him and the girl. Now he's telling 20 00:01:01,160 --> 00:01:03,280 Speaker 1: me he wants to marry me, but he's just not 21 00:01:03,440 --> 00:01:06,280 Speaker 1: ready for it, making excuses about work and money and 22 00:01:06,319 --> 00:01:09,640 Speaker 1: different stuff. Now I've been with him through thick and thin. 23 00:01:10,120 --> 00:01:12,760 Speaker 1: Despite the fact that everyone's advice to me is to 24 00:01:12,880 --> 00:01:15,920 Speaker 1: leave him, I'm seeking your advice, advice for a man 25 00:01:16,040 --> 00:01:19,440 Speaker 1: with no interest of gaining Now I've been hearing rumors 26 00:01:19,640 --> 00:01:22,320 Speaker 1: that he's been telling people that I'm running him down, 27 00:01:22,560 --> 00:01:24,800 Speaker 1: when this is not true. There were a couple of 28 00:01:24,840 --> 00:01:27,880 Speaker 1: times when I tried ending it and he asked me back, 29 00:01:28,240 --> 00:01:33,280 Speaker 1: what should I believe? I'm so confused. I'm confused too 30 00:01:33,280 --> 00:01:36,920 Speaker 1: with this entire letter. I'm confused while you're still in 31 00:01:36,959 --> 00:01:39,880 Speaker 1: this relationship, That's what I'm confused about. And where's this 32 00:01:40,000 --> 00:01:43,360 Speaker 1: relationship going? Six years you've been in this and you've 33 00:01:43,400 --> 00:01:46,160 Speaker 1: been through cheating that resulted in a baby. Now you 34 00:01:46,200 --> 00:01:48,880 Speaker 1: say he's cheating again. I just got to ask you, 35 00:01:48,920 --> 00:01:51,240 Speaker 1: why are you letting this man treat you like this? 36 00:01:51,400 --> 00:01:53,720 Speaker 1: He's doing whatever he wants to do, and you've just 37 00:01:53,800 --> 00:01:56,520 Speaker 1: been there taking it for the last six years. I mean, 38 00:01:56,560 --> 00:02:00,240 Speaker 1: don't you see that you he his mother is not 39 00:02:00,360 --> 00:02:03,960 Speaker 1: the problem here. Uh really, his mother is doing you 40 00:02:04,000 --> 00:02:06,200 Speaker 1: a favor. You should take her advice and get out 41 00:02:06,280 --> 00:02:12,679 Speaker 1: of this relationship with this man period. Steve well Man um, 42 00:02:12,800 --> 00:02:15,920 Speaker 1: this to me is a clear cut letter about a 43 00:02:16,000 --> 00:02:19,839 Speaker 1: mama's boy. This is a letter about a mama's boy 44 00:02:20,919 --> 00:02:25,079 Speaker 1: that you've fallen in love with it and it's not working. Uh, 45 00:02:25,160 --> 00:02:28,560 Speaker 1: you say, Steve, I want your advice. You want the 46 00:02:28,600 --> 00:02:34,480 Speaker 1: advice from somebody. Uh yeah, okay, So here it is. 47 00:02:35,120 --> 00:02:37,200 Speaker 1: First of all, you've been in a relationship like Shirley 48 00:02:37,240 --> 00:02:42,160 Speaker 1: Safe for six years. Where is this going? Secondly, he 49 00:02:42,200 --> 00:02:44,320 Speaker 1: started cheating on you three years ago. He had a 50 00:02:44,400 --> 00:02:47,640 Speaker 1: child with that girl, and now he's cheating again. Um, 51 00:02:48,360 --> 00:02:50,960 Speaker 1: what is this relationship that you all have or what 52 00:02:51,120 --> 00:02:55,799 Speaker 1: is it called? What? What title do you have from 53 00:02:55,800 --> 00:02:57,920 Speaker 1: you know? I don't I don't know what you call this? 54 00:02:58,200 --> 00:03:02,679 Speaker 1: Right here? You're in a real relationship. He's not. See, 55 00:03:02,760 --> 00:03:05,720 Speaker 1: lady ladies missed that. Sometimes sometimes you're in a more 56 00:03:05,760 --> 00:03:10,040 Speaker 1: of a committed relationship than the guy is. Sometimes just sometimes, 57 00:03:10,160 --> 00:03:12,839 Speaker 1: you know, and then sometimes things happen. I'll just tell 58 00:03:12,880 --> 00:03:19,200 Speaker 1: your goals both ways, so you know you could have that. Uh. Then, uh, 59 00:03:19,280 --> 00:03:21,520 Speaker 1: you thought that you had a problem with her mama 60 00:03:21,600 --> 00:03:24,440 Speaker 1: because she's trying to take you're trying to take her 61 00:03:24,520 --> 00:03:28,240 Speaker 1: son from her. That's a mama's boy. I wrote him 62 00:03:28,240 --> 00:03:31,079 Speaker 1: a letter while back telling to him that here's the problem. 63 00:03:31,120 --> 00:03:34,519 Speaker 1: In your laft, I need him to be a man. Well, 64 00:03:34,600 --> 00:03:38,120 Speaker 1: if he don't want to be a man, you're needing 65 00:03:38,200 --> 00:03:40,640 Speaker 1: someone to be a man who don't want to be 66 00:03:40,720 --> 00:03:44,320 Speaker 1: a man yet, or it's not a man yet, you know, 67 00:03:44,400 --> 00:03:47,680 Speaker 1: maybe he's just not developed there yet. Then you say 68 00:03:48,000 --> 00:03:50,840 Speaker 1: someone you can rely on, the man that I need 69 00:03:50,840 --> 00:03:54,880 Speaker 1: to head our household. Well, let me tell you what happens. 70 00:03:54,920 --> 00:03:58,160 Speaker 1: Even if you marry this boy right now, this mama's boy, 71 00:03:58,480 --> 00:04:01,960 Speaker 1: he's not gonna head the house. His mother is gonna 72 00:04:02,000 --> 00:04:04,800 Speaker 1: be the head of y'all's household. And you can ask 73 00:04:04,840 --> 00:04:07,560 Speaker 1: any woman that's married to a mama's boy if that 74 00:04:07,600 --> 00:04:11,240 Speaker 1: ain't how it works. So what you're really asking this 75 00:04:11,280 --> 00:04:13,680 Speaker 1: boy to do is be a man he's not ready 76 00:04:13,720 --> 00:04:15,640 Speaker 1: to be. And then you want him to head up 77 00:04:15,640 --> 00:04:18,279 Speaker 1: you all's household because that's your dream one day of 78 00:04:18,360 --> 00:04:20,440 Speaker 1: having a man to head up the household. But if 79 00:04:20,480 --> 00:04:23,840 Speaker 1: you marry mama's boy, the mother is actually gonna become 80 00:04:23,839 --> 00:04:27,040 Speaker 1: the head of your household, and you're gonna be forever 81 00:04:27,240 --> 00:04:30,440 Speaker 1: piss at him and her, and your life is gonna 82 00:04:30,440 --> 00:04:33,040 Speaker 1: be a miserable situation. I give you more when we 83 00:04:33,160 --> 00:04:36,200 Speaker 1: come back, But in this letter, you say, Now, he's 84 00:04:36,200 --> 00:04:38,640 Speaker 1: telling me that he wants to marry me, but he's 85 00:04:38,720 --> 00:04:42,440 Speaker 1: just not ready for it, making excuses about work and 86 00:04:42,520 --> 00:04:46,600 Speaker 1: money and different stuff. Okay, I think you have your 87 00:04:46,600 --> 00:04:48,520 Speaker 1: own answer right here, but I give you more when 88 00:04:48,520 --> 00:04:53,520 Speaker 1: we come back. This woman writes his letter entitled cheating 89 00:04:53,560 --> 00:04:56,480 Speaker 1: board friend. Well, he's a cheating boyfriend and it's a 90 00:04:56,560 --> 00:04:58,880 Speaker 1: mama's boy. You got a couple of problems. Your man 91 00:04:59,000 --> 00:05:03,080 Speaker 1: is cheating on him. That's a problem. And he's a 92 00:05:03,160 --> 00:05:06,640 Speaker 1: mama's boy, which I can't even tell you the problems 93 00:05:06,680 --> 00:05:09,080 Speaker 1: it's gonna lead into, but you're already running into him. 94 00:05:09,080 --> 00:05:11,839 Speaker 1: She's spread rumors about you. She read your letter that 95 00:05:11,880 --> 00:05:14,680 Speaker 1: you read to him. Most mothers, if a woman writes 96 00:05:14,720 --> 00:05:17,280 Speaker 1: a letter to her son that's private information, she won't 97 00:05:17,320 --> 00:05:20,080 Speaker 1: read it. She reads it and then starts taking matters 98 00:05:20,080 --> 00:05:22,839 Speaker 1: into her own hands. Got the other girl coming over 99 00:05:22,880 --> 00:05:25,160 Speaker 1: to the house telling you to stay out of their way, 100 00:05:25,360 --> 00:05:27,640 Speaker 1: or the other boy and the other girl. So not 101 00:05:27,800 --> 00:05:31,320 Speaker 1: a mama know he cheating, She condoning it. He ain't stopping. 102 00:05:31,480 --> 00:05:33,760 Speaker 1: He's doing everything but stopping cheating. There's nothing in your 103 00:05:33,839 --> 00:05:36,280 Speaker 1: letters says that. And then you get to this part 104 00:05:36,279 --> 00:05:39,279 Speaker 1: where he says. Now he's telling me that he wants 105 00:05:39,320 --> 00:05:42,559 Speaker 1: to marry me, but he's not ready for it, making 106 00:05:42,680 --> 00:05:46,800 Speaker 1: excuses about work and money and different stuff. Excuse me, 107 00:05:47,880 --> 00:05:52,000 Speaker 1: you're gonna marry a man who ain't working, who makes 108 00:05:52,080 --> 00:05:57,320 Speaker 1: excuse about working. Look, I got if a guy been 109 00:05:57,360 --> 00:05:59,400 Speaker 1: in trouble and he got a felony record, and it's 110 00:05:59,440 --> 00:06:01,920 Speaker 1: half of him. Fine work, But this door is making 111 00:06:02,000 --> 00:06:07,240 Speaker 1: excuses for not working. He don't want to work, he 112 00:06:07,279 --> 00:06:11,080 Speaker 1: ain't got no money, and undifferent stuff. Ain't no telling 113 00:06:11,160 --> 00:06:13,200 Speaker 1: what else. The excuses are coming in. He says, he 114 00:06:13,240 --> 00:06:15,599 Speaker 1: wants to marry you. If you marry this boy right here, 115 00:06:16,200 --> 00:06:18,800 Speaker 1: you're going to make a huge mistake with your life. 116 00:06:19,360 --> 00:06:22,760 Speaker 1: Now here's the problem that one of the number one 117 00:06:22,760 --> 00:06:26,000 Speaker 1: problems one of this next line. Now, I've been with 118 00:06:26,080 --> 00:06:29,919 Speaker 1: him through thick and thin, despite that, everyone advises me 119 00:06:30,040 --> 00:06:33,040 Speaker 1: to leave him. See your problem is now you've got 120 00:06:33,040 --> 00:06:37,080 Speaker 1: this six years invested, and women always do that, you 121 00:06:37,279 --> 00:06:40,640 Speaker 1: always you always look one of your biggest mistakes is 122 00:06:41,040 --> 00:06:44,320 Speaker 1: you put this time in and you don't want to 123 00:06:44,360 --> 00:06:47,840 Speaker 1: consider it a waste. Well, let me turn your onto something. 124 00:06:47,960 --> 00:06:51,719 Speaker 1: The real waste is to continue what you know is 125 00:06:51,800 --> 00:06:55,839 Speaker 1: not good. For you. See, Okay, look, everybody makes mistakes. 126 00:06:55,920 --> 00:06:58,080 Speaker 1: So you put six years in thinking it was gonna 127 00:06:58,080 --> 00:07:00,560 Speaker 1: turn around and it didn't. That's some stake A lot 128 00:07:00,560 --> 00:07:02,919 Speaker 1: of people make that. Who hasn't done it? I've done it. 129 00:07:03,000 --> 00:07:06,680 Speaker 1: Everybody has done it. But once you realize something is 130 00:07:06,720 --> 00:07:11,360 Speaker 1: not good for you, once you realize when you've gotten 131 00:07:11,400 --> 00:07:14,000 Speaker 1: all the evidency in and the change that you're waiting 132 00:07:14,000 --> 00:07:16,520 Speaker 1: on never comes and you continue to stay in it, 133 00:07:17,000 --> 00:07:19,400 Speaker 1: that from that moment on is when you're wasting time. 134 00:07:19,480 --> 00:07:25,320 Speaker 1: Because right, so, do not continue to waste time now 135 00:07:25,360 --> 00:07:28,240 Speaker 1: that you know it's bad for you, get out of 136 00:07:28,920 --> 00:07:32,040 Speaker 1: the ladies spreading rumors, telling people, and then you start 137 00:07:32,120 --> 00:07:35,440 Speaker 1: hearing rumors that he's telling people that I'm running him down. 138 00:07:35,600 --> 00:07:38,160 Speaker 1: This is not true. Why is he talking to other 139 00:07:38,200 --> 00:07:41,240 Speaker 1: people about you? What kind of no man does this? 140 00:07:42,320 --> 00:07:45,760 Speaker 1: None of my friends come to me talking about how 141 00:07:45,800 --> 00:07:49,240 Speaker 1: their wives ain't this for that that Real men just 142 00:07:49,280 --> 00:07:51,720 Speaker 1: don't do that with they boys. Man, I'm struggling, man, 143 00:07:51,800 --> 00:07:55,040 Speaker 1: my girl tripping? Man, she she found this on me 144 00:07:55,120 --> 00:07:57,480 Speaker 1: or something like that. We'll say that, but what we 145 00:07:57,520 --> 00:08:01,400 Speaker 1: ain't gonna say is, man, my girl, my girl ain't 146 00:08:01,440 --> 00:08:03,640 Speaker 1: this Mike. We don't go that to our friends that 147 00:08:05,400 --> 00:08:07,440 Speaker 1: hey man, you you need to get away from this 148 00:08:07,480 --> 00:08:09,760 Speaker 1: because this man ain't ready. You said he's not ready. 149 00:08:10,080 --> 00:08:13,200 Speaker 1: He's not ready. He's a mama's boy. He ain't working, 150 00:08:13,600 --> 00:08:15,760 Speaker 1: he don't want to be a man. He got other 151 00:08:15,880 --> 00:08:21,600 Speaker 1: women's just a boy. All right, Steve, we have to go. 152 00:08:22,800 --> 00:08:25,480 Speaker 1: We do email us your Instagram. I should taught them 153 00:08:25,480 --> 00:08:28,800 Speaker 1: today's letter at my girl. Surely okay. You're listening to 154 00:08:28,960 --> 00:08:30,559 Speaker 1: the Steve Harvey Morning Show