WEBVTT - Have reunion conversations

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<v Speaker 1>Welcome to Before Breakfast, a production of I Heart Radio.

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<v Speaker 1>Good Morning, This is Laura. Welcome to the Before Breakfast podcast.

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<v Speaker 1>Today's tip is to have reunion conversations to reconnect with

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<v Speaker 1>your family or your work team after time. A part

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<v Speaker 1>Sonya Lubomirski suggests having a reunion conversation with your spouse

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<v Speaker 1>in her book The How of Happiness, a Scientific Approach

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<v Speaker 1>to Getting the Life You Want, which is the source

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<v Speaker 1>of several other tips we talked about last week. When

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<v Speaker 1>you meet again in the evening, she says, have a

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<v Speaker 1>reunion conversation in a low stress setting and listen. She

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<v Speaker 1>acknowledges that this is tricky for couples with young children,

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<v Speaker 1>and suggests coming home fifteen minutes before the babysit our leaves,

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<v Speaker 1>or just letting your kids watch a show or play

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<v Speaker 1>a video game for a while. That way, you can

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<v Speaker 1>carve out time for you and your spouse to connect.

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<v Speaker 1>I love the idea of reunion conversations with our partners

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<v Speaker 1>and with other people who are important to us. It

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<v Speaker 1>pays to be intentional and reconnecting after time apart, rather

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<v Speaker 1>than just assuming that nothing has happened in anybody's lives

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<v Speaker 1>and that we can just pick up where we left

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<v Speaker 1>off the last time we were together. Perhaps when your

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<v Speaker 1>kids come home from school, you all gather at the

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<v Speaker 1>kitchen island for a snack and ten minutes of conversation

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<v Speaker 1>about the day. You might even ritualize this reunion conversation

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<v Speaker 1>by having a special plate that the snack is always

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<v Speaker 1>served on and a special name for the time, like

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<v Speaker 1>chat and chew. Reunion conversations are important with coworkers too.

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<v Speaker 1>When you meet up with a colleague, instead of launching

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<v Speaker 1>into planning an upcoming event or solving an I t issue,

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<v Speaker 1>take some time to reconnect, to listen to each other

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<v Speaker 1>to find out what's going on for your colleague professionally

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<v Speaker 1>and personally. You can do this at team meetings too,

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<v Speaker 1>through organic conversation before the meeting and also through more

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<v Speaker 1>structured sharing as part of the meeting agenda. Sometimes people

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<v Speaker 1>hesitate to have this sort of conversation with coworkers because

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<v Speaker 1>they want to respect their time by avoiding small talk,

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<v Speaker 1>or respect their privacy by steering clear of personal questions.

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<v Speaker 1>And we do want to respect each other's time and privacy.

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<v Speaker 1>At the same time, relationships fuel our work together, so

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<v Speaker 1>it's good to know our colleagues and engage with them

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<v Speaker 1>as whole people. So take a risk and reconnect personally

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<v Speaker 1>before you dive into work. Now, you may be thinking

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<v Speaker 1>that this is not the time for reunion conversations because

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<v Speaker 1>you're with your family and you're never actually physically with

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<v Speaker 1>your colleagues anymore. I would counter that reunion conversations maybe

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<v Speaker 1>even more important these days. It's easy to assume that

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<v Speaker 1>nothing has happened in your partners or kids lives since

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<v Speaker 1>breakfast because you've all been in the same house all day,

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<v Speaker 1>But in fact, work in school are more varied and

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<v Speaker 1>surprising and often more difficult. Now kids and adults alike

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<v Speaker 1>maybe having more emotionally intense days. This calls for really

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<v Speaker 1>listening to each other as we debrief. What's more, reunion

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<v Speaker 1>conversations can mark the end of individual school and work

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<v Speaker 1>time and the beginning of family time to gather. They

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<v Speaker 1>can be a helpful transition between those separate parts of

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<v Speaker 1>the day. While families are reuniting after having been in

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<v Speaker 1>the same space all day. Work reunions these days are

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<v Speaker 1>more likely by phone or video conference rather than in person.

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<v Speaker 1>Now it's all the more valuable to check in with

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<v Speaker 1>your colleagues. When you see a video conference screen with

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<v Speaker 1>a Brady Bunch grid of smiley faces, look more deeply.

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<v Speaker 1>We need to acknowledge people's lives beyond those squares. So

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<v Speaker 1>what happened since the last time you saw them? Take

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<v Speaker 1>a few minutes to find out and everyone will feel

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<v Speaker 1>more connected in the meantime. This is Laura. Thanks for listening,

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<v Speaker 1>and here's to making the most of our time. Hey, everybody,

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<v Speaker 1>I'd love to hear from you. You can send me

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<v Speaker 1>your tips, your questions, or anything else. Just connect with

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<v Speaker 1>me on Twitter, Facebook and Instagram at Before Breakfast pod

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<v Speaker 1>that's B the number four, then Breakfast p o D.

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<v Speaker 1>You can also shoot me an email at Before Breakfast

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<v Speaker 1>podcast at i heeart media dot com that Before Breakfast

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<v Speaker 1>is spelled out with all the letters. Thanks so much,

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<v Speaker 1>I look forward to staying in touch. Before Breakfast is

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<v Speaker 1>a production of I Heart Radio. For more podcasts from

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<v Speaker 1>my Heart Radio, visit the I Heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts,

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<v Speaker 1>or wherever you listen to your favorite shows. H m

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<v Speaker 1>hm