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Speaker 1: It is time now for today's Strawberry Letter. And if

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Speaker 1: you need advice on relationships, work, sex, parenting, and more.

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Speaker 1: Please submit your Strawberry Letter to Steve HARVEYFM dot com

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Speaker 1: by clicking clicking submit Strawberry Letter. Okay, And we could

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Speaker 1: be reading your letter live on the air. Say submit

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Speaker 1: your Strawberry letter by clicking submit Strawberry Letter.

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Speaker 2: Okay, there you go.

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Speaker 1: That's what I've meant. We could be reading your letter

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Speaker 1: live on the air, just like we're going to read

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Speaker 1: this one right here, right now. And you never know,

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Speaker 1: this one could be yours.

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Speaker 2: You never know. Buckle up and hold on tight. We

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Speaker 2: got it. Poor you. Here it is Strawberry Letter.

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Speaker 1: Thank you, nephew. Subject It's not a big deal at all,

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Speaker 1: Dear Stephen Shirley. I've been married for eight years, and

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Speaker 1: I've been faking it for ten years. We met when

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Speaker 1: I was twenty two years old, and I had nothing

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Speaker 1: to compare the intimacy to, so it was fine. He

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Speaker 1: was my first and only man for ten long years.

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Speaker 1: Then a month ago, my good friend had a bachelorette

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Speaker 1: party and she had mail strippers there. The strippers were

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Speaker 1: scrawny and couldn't dance, so we laughed at them. Then

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Speaker 1: a big black stripper showed up and said he got lost.

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Speaker 1: He went to the back and got oiled up, and

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Speaker 1: lordy Lottie, when he came back in his thong, he

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Speaker 1: shut the whole party down. I couldn't stop staring. He

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Speaker 1: noticed me, and he gave me a lot of attention.

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Speaker 1: He whispered to me to relax because my whole body

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Speaker 1: was tensed up. The other six ladies darn near ripped

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Speaker 1: his underwear off, and he got offended and said he

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Speaker 1: was leaving. When he went to the back to put

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Speaker 1: his clothes on, I had to use the bathroom. He

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Speaker 1: saw me going into the bathroom and he asked if

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Speaker 1: he could wash his face before I used it. I

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Speaker 1: allowed him to use the bathroom first, since he was

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Speaker 1: so mad that the ladies attacked him. He teased me

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Speaker 1: about being very uptight and asked He asked if he

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Speaker 1: could help me unwind. I didn't know it would involve

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Speaker 1: his tongue and other things. I didn't stop him or

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Speaker 1: use common sense. I had the best sexual experience of

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Speaker 1: my life on the bathroom floor. He asked if we

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Speaker 1: could keep in touch, and I told him I was married.

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Speaker 1: He said he could see I was married, but I

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Speaker 1: could pay him to help me unwind whenever I needed. Here,

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Speaker 1: I am with my little, average sized husband, and I

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Speaker 1: have the big Stripperman's number in my phone. How bad

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Speaker 1: would it be if I cheated just one more time? Okay,

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Speaker 1: So you're asking permission or opinions from Steve and I

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Speaker 1: on what we think about you cheating on your husband again.

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Speaker 1: You want us to tell you how bad it would

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Speaker 1: be if you did it just one more time. Hmm.

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Speaker 1: I said that aloud two different ways, so maybe if

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Speaker 1: you heard it back you would understand how crazy all

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Speaker 1: this sounds. And married lady, you know we're not gonna

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Speaker 1: tell you. Yes, girl, go for it. Go for it.

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Speaker 1: One of the problems with going back for that one

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Speaker 1: more time, and anyone who has told you who anyone

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Speaker 1: who has done this gone back for that one more

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Speaker 1: time knows that at that moment you get hooked, okay,

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Speaker 1: and you keep going back, and you keep going back,

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Speaker 1: and every time is your last time. That's what you

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Speaker 1: always tell yourself. Okay, one more time, this is this

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Speaker 1: is the last time. But it doesn't stop. It won't

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Speaker 1: just be you know, one time your last time. It

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Speaker 1: won't just be that. I'm telling you right now. If

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Speaker 1: you're going to keep going and keep going and keep going, okay,

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Speaker 1: all I can tell you is that you are married.

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Speaker 1: Please remember that. Even though women are much better at

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Speaker 1: cheating than men, as a woman, I still say, don't

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Speaker 1: gamble with your marriage because you can lose, You can

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Speaker 1: lose everything. Instead of faking it with your husband, why

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Speaker 1: don't you talk to him about what you like and

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Speaker 1: kind of teach him how to please you. You guys were

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Speaker 1: really young when you got married. Instead of taking the

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Speaker 1: easy way out with cheating and paying paying for a

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Speaker 1: stripper to come by and please you, think about that, Steve.

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Speaker 3: I normally don't do this, Sureley, but I'm gonna have

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Speaker 3: to start my letter with a statement. You just made

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Speaker 3: sit your husband down and tell him what you like? Yeah, now,

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Speaker 3: how this conversation gonna stuff?

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Speaker 2: Well? What I like? Well, if you was bigger and

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Speaker 2: dogs again.

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Speaker 3: And I like other things tongue and some other things,

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Speaker 3: and oh that's what I like. I don't think she

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Speaker 3: can set her husband down and tell him what she liked,

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Speaker 3: because she didn't know she liked it till she left

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Speaker 3: the stripper. The bachelor party. That's not a good suggestion.

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Speaker 3: So now let's start the letter over. You've been mad

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Speaker 3: for eight years. Y'all met when you was twenty two,

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Speaker 3: you thirty at least right now. He was your first

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Speaker 3: and only man for ten years. Then a month ago

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Speaker 3: something happened. You went to a bachelorette party from strippers.

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Speaker 3: Was there, y'all was laughing at him, scrowny, couldn't dance.

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Speaker 3: Then El Domingo. Jango showed up.

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Speaker 2: That's the name.

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Speaker 3: Jango showed up in chains. Jango showed up lost because

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Speaker 3: he ain't got no GPS. Because Jango came to the

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Speaker 3: stripper party on a buck board.

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Speaker 2: Pulled by a mute.

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Speaker 3: Wow, that's how Jangle got lost. See you don't know

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Speaker 3: that Django ain't got no car or nothing. Jangle field hand.

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Speaker 3: Django came up in there with a bare lap shots on.

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Speaker 3: Django came up on there. That wasn't all. That was

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Speaker 3: just sweat from out in the fields. Django was next.

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Speaker 3: When I come back, I will tell you what happened

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Speaker 3: when Django came out the bathroom.

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Speaker 1: All right, hang on for part two of Steve's response,

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Speaker 1: coming up at twenty three minutes after the hour. Today's

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Speaker 1: strawberry letter. Subject is not a big deal at all.

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Speaker 1: We'll get back into it right after this. You're listening

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Speaker 1: Hardy Morning Show. All right, Come on, Steve latreecap today's

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Speaker 1: strawberry letter. The subject it's not a big deal at all.

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Speaker 3: This girl was twenty two when she met her husband,

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Speaker 3: been married for ten years. He's the only man she's

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Speaker 3: ever been with. Then about a month ago, one of

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Speaker 3: her girls had a bachelor party. So that means she's

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Speaker 3: thirty or thirty two. They've been together, married ten years.

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Speaker 3: We probably met him when she was twenty two, probably

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Speaker 3: dated for a couple of year. I probably she about

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Speaker 3: thirty two thirty four, went to the bachelor party. Some

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Speaker 3: strippers was there. Scrony couldn't dance. The women was laughing

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Speaker 3: at her. But one of them came in late. He

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Speaker 3: came in late be cause he was the big, beautiful

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Speaker 3: black dancer. They noticed he looked a little unruly because

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Speaker 3: he had on some bird lap shots. The reason he

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Speaker 3: got lost is because he don't have GPS. His name

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Speaker 3: was Django. Django came in on a buckboard poured by mule.

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Speaker 2: Y'all say.

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Speaker 3: He went in the back and got all up. That

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Speaker 3: wasn't all. That was sweat from the fields. He's a

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Speaker 3: field hand.

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Speaker 2: Jingo came out with his thong on and.

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Speaker 3: Lord, Lord, Lord, you found out what django meant. Jano

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Speaker 3: is an old African mean, Old African word. Django is

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Speaker 3: an old African word. It means dad go.

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Speaker 2: Is al.

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Speaker 3: Django is an old African word, it means dad go,

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Speaker 3: And so they called him Jango, dad go. Jango came

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Speaker 3: out there and the women lost they mind. Djano shut

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Speaker 3: the party down. Jango was moving and the women damn

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Speaker 3: near toe his underwear off. He got upset because he

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Speaker 3: didn't sign up for that. So now Django is upset

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Speaker 3: and he finally get through. You had to go to

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Speaker 3: the bathroom, and he had to go to the bathroom,

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Speaker 3: and he saw you go down the hall way and

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Speaker 3: you was going in there and he said, he said,

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Speaker 3: do you mind if I washed my face face sweat?

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Speaker 3: He wanted to get it off because that wasn't all

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Speaker 3: he was using. It was actually corn husker's lotion. He

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Speaker 3: made it hisself. What world I'm building a story, Jingle

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Speaker 3: field hand, He made his own corn husky's lotion. He

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Speaker 3: don't like driving in it, so he wanted to wash

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Speaker 3: it off his face. Okay, So then he let you

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Speaker 3: in the bathroom and he noticed you was uptight. He

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Speaker 3: told you to relax. You was tense. He told you

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Speaker 3: that when he was trying to give you that lap

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Speaker 3: dan As you didn't want. But he rubbed Django up

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Speaker 3: against you. And now all of a sudden, you're in

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Speaker 3: that bathroom with Jingo. He said, look, you need to relax.

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Speaker 3: You want me to help you to relax, And you said,

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Speaker 3: uh huh. First you said, I'm not up tank. He said,

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Speaker 3: but I could feel the tension in your shoulders. And

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Speaker 3: he put them big hands on your shoulders, the one

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Speaker 3: that had been picking.

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Speaker 2: Y'all. I didn't say nothing.

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Speaker 3: I just said their hands that he had been picking,

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Speaker 3: he hit those are his picking hands. They was rough,

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Speaker 3: but they were soft because they knew how to handle it.

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Speaker 3: And next thing you was caught up in it. He

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Speaker 3: was rubbing your shoulders and all of a sudden, Django

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Speaker 3: started pressing down on your shoulders, and next thing you know,

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Speaker 3: you was in the floor. Django bagged up, scooted up

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Speaker 3: against the door. Now your head is in a bent position.

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Speaker 3: It's up against the bath tub. Jango stretched out and

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Speaker 3: you said in your letter right here, I'm not making

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Speaker 3: this up, you said in your letter right here. No, no,

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Speaker 3: I didn't know it would involve his tongue and other things.

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Speaker 3: He said, well, little girl, I don't want to tell

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Speaker 3: you something. It was no other things in there. It

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Speaker 3: was just django.

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Speaker 2: Tongue, okay, And that was all it was.

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Speaker 3: But he was such an expert at it. You thought

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Speaker 3: it was some more things in there. It was just

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Speaker 3: had one thing.

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Speaker 2: Looker. You just had never seen it like that before.

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Speaker 3: And Django was in there bouty and then it was

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Speaker 3: the best sexual experience of my life. On the bathroom floor.

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Speaker 3: He asked if we could keep in touch. I told

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Speaker 3: him I was married. He said he could see you

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Speaker 3: was married, but you could pay him to help you

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Speaker 3: unwine whenever I needed it. Here I am with my

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Speaker 3: little advertised husband, and I had to beck the big

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Speaker 3: strip of man's number in my phone. How bad would

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Speaker 3: it be if I cheated one more time?

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Speaker 2: Girl?

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Speaker 3: Django is like a bag of laized potato chips. Yeah yeah, girl,

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Speaker 3: you ain't gonna be able to lead just one that

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Speaker 3: damn Jango came up in there with all that field

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Speaker 3: hand experience.

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Speaker 2: With that homemade corn huskers loach because that jangle.

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Speaker 3: Jango don't need gas money. Jango need oat money. He

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Speaker 3: gotta feed the mule. Oh God, that brings him from

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Speaker 3: gig to give.

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Speaker 2: Uh. Django is a jigglo and a male escort.

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Speaker 3: You're about to be involved in an old profession called prostitution.

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Speaker 2: Don't do it, little girl. You ain't strong enough, all right?

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Speaker 3: Uh?

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Speaker 1: Leave your comments on today's Stop Letter on Instagram at

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Speaker 1: Steve Barb at them and check out the Strawberry Letter podcast.

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Speaker 1: Coming up next, it is Junior and Sports Talk. Right

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Speaker 1: after this, you're listening to Harvey Morning Show