WEBVTT - Ep. 26: Carl Weathers Goes to Cabela’s 0:00:02.120 --> 0:00:06.240 He's also not wearing socks inside those work boots because 0:00:06.240 --> 0:00:08.800 he used his socks to wipe his ASTs. She literally 0:00:08.840 --> 0:00:10.680 looked like she was gonna have a heart attack because 0:00:10.720 --> 0:00:13.080 this was her prize little poodle. If I had used 0:00:13.080 --> 0:00:17.280 my tenants ager, you're Vexilla would be gone. I live 0:00:17.320 --> 0:00:21.400 in Washington State and we have hogs for steel head. 0:00:22.040 --> 0:00:24.960 I catched them all the time and avoid game officers 0:00:25.000 --> 0:00:27.120 while I take a picture of them and put them back. 0:00:31.400 --> 0:00:34.479 Good morning, degenerate anglers, and welcome to Bent, the fishing 0:00:34.560 --> 0:00:37.200 podcast that cooked up a story and dropped the six 0:00:37.200 --> 0:00:39.400 of you in a meat grinder, leaving you wondering what 0:00:39.520 --> 0:00:41.760 happened to it because it used to be a podcast 0:00:42.200 --> 0:00:46.000 you could trust when asking for detailed directions to phishing spots. 0:00:46.560 --> 0:00:56.080 I'm Joe Surmelie Miles, I'm Miles multi was was that 0:00:56.160 --> 0:00:59.200 a Was that a predator reference? Yes? It was, it was. 0:00:59.520 --> 0:01:01.959 It was, yeah, a predator, and it was an obscure 0:01:02.040 --> 0:01:05.360 one because really it's just my my roundabout way say. 0:01:07.840 --> 0:01:09.679 It's my roundabout way of saying. The theme for this 0:01:09.720 --> 0:01:20.840 week's show is Carl Weathers. So the theme I'll all right, 0:01:21.040 --> 0:01:24.800 all right, you're through me? But the theme sounds it 0:01:24.880 --> 0:01:28.440 sounds a little questionable, and as was the Yeah, it's 0:01:28.440 --> 0:01:31.160 sort of I mean, no more questionable than the reference 0:01:31.200 --> 0:01:34.200 you started with. But you know what, dude, I'll play good. 0:01:34.280 --> 0:01:38.080 Come down. I'm just thinking about this now. I would 0:01:38.080 --> 0:01:41.320 say though, that for the record, uh, I probably would 0:01:41.319 --> 0:01:44.480 have skipped a Saturday Night Live clip that you that 0:01:44.560 --> 0:01:46.640 you started with. I think I would have used this 0:01:46.680 --> 0:01:50.760 one instead. His name is Carl Weathers, and he's my 0:01:50.840 --> 0:01:54.120 new acting teacher and Lindsey, he's teaching me all these 0:01:54.200 --> 0:01:58.800 valuable life lessons. Okay, touche touche. I love I love 0:01:59.040 --> 0:02:01.880 I love the arrested development angle you took their Uh 0:02:02.080 --> 0:02:04.320 so does this? Does this mean you're in this? I mean, 0:02:04.320 --> 0:02:06.920 we're gonna do a Carl Weathers show because I just 0:02:06.960 --> 0:02:09.280 want to. I want to clarify something to our listeners, 0:02:09.320 --> 0:02:11.560 Like we don't think about this ship weeks in advance. 0:02:11.639 --> 0:02:15.120 Often the theme like it's like sometimes hours before we 0:02:15.160 --> 0:02:17.680 record it. So this is not some it was. I 0:02:17.720 --> 0:02:19.680 was putting this together and I was like, Carl Weathers, 0:02:19.720 --> 0:02:22.560 that's the theme, dude, Like I said, I mean, if 0:02:22.639 --> 0:02:25.640 if nothing else, I'm like, I'm very very invested in 0:02:25.680 --> 0:02:29.320 seeing exactly how how you're gonna go about trying to 0:02:29.320 --> 0:02:33.839 pull this one together. So yeah, I mean I take 0:02:33.880 --> 0:02:35.720 that as a compliment from you, man, I feel we 0:02:35.760 --> 0:02:38.920 can both appreciate the challenge of loosely based on a 0:02:38.960 --> 0:02:43.399 fishing podcast episode on like a rated out eighties movie star, 0:02:43.639 --> 0:02:46.320 what could possibly go wrong? Maybe this was such a 0:02:46.639 --> 0:02:52.160 good afternoon. You know, I respect a writing challenge and 0:02:52.240 --> 0:02:54.800 a feat such as this, And I wish you nothing 0:02:54.840 --> 0:02:57.640 but luck. But before even let you really get started, 0:02:57.639 --> 0:02:59.320 I'm gonna sidetrack you because that's what we do to 0:02:59.360 --> 0:03:01.919 each other. And uh, and I'm gonna tell you that 0:03:02.000 --> 0:03:04.840 a story. I once had a neighbor, like when I 0:03:04.880 --> 0:03:07.680 was in my twenties, and and this neighbor had a 0:03:07.720 --> 0:03:11.680 Golden Retriever named Action Jackson. Oh no ship cool? Yeah, 0:03:11.919 --> 0:03:14.280 true story and so Action Jackson of course being the 0:03:14.480 --> 0:03:18.800 cult classic. Carl Weather's film from that is so over 0:03:18.840 --> 0:03:22.400 the top. It's like it's almost a parody of the 0:03:22.520 --> 0:03:26.359 genre of the action movie. It's it's so bad it's good. Um, 0:03:26.480 --> 0:03:28.600 I don't know it's good, but it is what it is. 0:03:28.639 --> 0:03:31.760 Like you, that was when action movies peaked and then 0:03:31.880 --> 0:03:35.000 went over the top. And that's the clip that we 0:03:35.040 --> 0:03:37.360 just played also came from that movie, for the record, 0:03:37.800 --> 0:03:41.880 And uh, I personally have always thought that Action Jackson 0:03:41.960 --> 0:03:45.560 might have been the best dog name. It's good. It's 0:03:45.640 --> 0:03:48.720 up there. Particularly was like this huge golden retriever that 0:03:48.800 --> 0:03:50.920 was always standing in the backyard barking at people. And 0:03:50.920 --> 0:03:53.640 I was like, you have the perfect name. And and 0:03:53.680 --> 0:03:55.960 I'm just gonna point out that I might be foreshadowing 0:03:56.200 --> 0:03:59.160 some things. You're gonna bring it later. I say, what 0:03:59.200 --> 0:04:01.640 you did there, that is good. Um, but look, I 0:04:01.720 --> 0:04:06.680 don't need luck. I'm going to Caral Weathers episode here today. 0:04:06.880 --> 0:04:09.920 It's done. It might not be good, but it's done. 0:04:10.000 --> 0:04:15.120 We're committed anyway, I will. It's happen. It's happened. It's happening. Um. 0:04:15.160 --> 0:04:17.320 If if I had to peg a real theme, maybe 0:04:17.320 --> 0:04:20.760 a sub theme, like a Subcarl Weathers theme this week's show, 0:04:22.520 --> 0:04:26.560 I guess it could be perseverance, which that hearkens us 0:04:26.560 --> 0:04:29.920 back to that old weekly word of yours perseverate. Yeah, 0:04:30.080 --> 0:04:32.240 that was I liked that one. Though you were not 0:04:32.320 --> 0:04:34.400 such a fan when I first I remember I first recorded. 0:04:34.400 --> 0:04:37.000 I was like, what do you think You're like so sure? 0:04:37.040 --> 0:04:38.680 So I'm glad. I'm glad to hear that you came 0:04:38.720 --> 0:04:41.479 around on that one. Final you admit that I was right. 0:04:41.600 --> 0:04:44.560 I have, I have, but probably because it just suits 0:04:44.600 --> 0:04:48.240 my own needs this week. So you know, um, this 0:04:48.279 --> 0:04:51.120 week you're gonna have to persevere through a few more 0:04:51.160 --> 0:04:53.400 caral weathers references, whether you like them or not. The 0:04:53.440 --> 0:04:57.159 smell of rank coolers, that's something else. What else? We got? 0:04:58.040 --> 0:05:01.640 A lure that might cause permanent ligament damage in your shoulders, 0:05:02.000 --> 0:05:06.560 and the stereotypical inshore cabella shopper are all things. Yep, 0:05:07.040 --> 0:05:10.479 we got we got things coming. Uh. Before we get there, though, 0:05:10.520 --> 0:05:12.359 you will have to persevere for through one of the 0:05:12.400 --> 0:05:16.640 thing we're leading off with a I don't know, dude, 0:05:16.640 --> 0:05:20.200 I never don't to describe a most unhumble that's good 0:05:20.880 --> 0:05:24.400 yet phenomenal angler, particularly when it comes to walleye or 0:05:24.400 --> 0:05:27.280 anything in the great legs. Uh. You know, I would 0:05:27.320 --> 0:05:30.400 go so far as to call to call Ross arrogant. 0:05:30.600 --> 0:05:32.680 I think I think that's fair. He's an arrogant man, 0:05:32.680 --> 0:05:35.080 which you know, could that's a quality you might want 0:05:35.080 --> 0:05:37.640 a fishing guide. I'll say that too. I think I 0:05:37.680 --> 0:05:39.760 think it's good. I want to like if if I'm 0:05:39.839 --> 0:05:42.200 hiring the guy, I want the guy who's like overconfident 0:05:42.200 --> 0:05:43.920 that we're gonna catch fish, not the guy who's like, 0:05:44.480 --> 0:05:46.960 I don't know, maybe true. That's a good Yeah, you're right, 0:05:47.240 --> 0:05:49.760 you're right. So anyway, Ross Ross Roberts is back this 0:05:49.800 --> 0:05:53.040 week for the Smooth Moves segment. Uh our our favorite 0:05:53.320 --> 0:05:57.800 time to let guides and captains tell humorous stories or 0:05:57.920 --> 0:05:59.880 just bitch about things. Clients do whatever they feel like 0:06:00.040 --> 0:06:02.000 telling us, and Ross is gonna tell us about his 0:06:02.040 --> 0:06:04.880 favorite cocktail recipe that Mary's Whiskey before sun up with 0:06:04.960 --> 0:06:18.000 lap dogs and atrial fibrillation. Why joining us today on 0:06:18.080 --> 0:06:20.600 Smooth Moves one of my all time favorite people. It's 0:06:20.600 --> 0:06:23.840 a bold statement. I know, I know I'm seeing him 0:06:23.839 --> 0:06:25.200 on a screen right now in the look of shock, 0:06:25.720 --> 0:06:32.080 Captain Ross robertson bid water fishing. How are you my friend? Friend? 0:06:32.600 --> 0:06:34.520 One of I mean right now, I'm just overwhelmed. I 0:06:34.560 --> 0:06:38.640 feel like I feel overwhelmed because you showed up wearing 0:06:38.640 --> 0:06:41.760 a hat that says smooth Moves. Yeah, that is like, 0:06:42.080 --> 0:06:45.039 did you do was there was that thought through or 0:06:45.080 --> 0:06:47.520 just a complete accident? I mean, you know, I'm just 0:06:47.560 --> 0:06:49.840 a human train wreck. So probably not, but I mean 0:06:50.080 --> 0:06:53.640 smooth new suspension seats. I mean, seriously, you know what, 0:06:53.760 --> 0:06:55.359 I like it so much I'll let you plug the 0:06:55.360 --> 0:06:58.760 sponsor because I'm like, man, he sat down with this. 0:06:58.760 --> 0:07:00.640 This reminds me of the time I four show to 0:07:00.720 --> 0:07:02.960 where I had that says get over yourself. You remember 0:07:03.000 --> 0:07:06.640 that that was good too anyway, Um, so I'm just 0:07:06.640 --> 0:07:10.600 saying that's brand in more ways than one. But yeah, yeah, 0:07:10.640 --> 0:07:12.240 I have no problem with it. People. You know, it's 0:07:12.240 --> 0:07:14.360 just funny like people think me and you hate each other. 0:07:14.400 --> 0:07:18.880 It's funny. It is true when I mean just like, yeah, 0:07:19.280 --> 0:07:22.600 I just I can tolerate you. Is the thing you said, 0:07:22.600 --> 0:07:25.520 my semi tolerable friend, because I remember things too. I've 0:07:25.560 --> 0:07:28.840 referred to you as that many times, my semi tolerable friend, 0:07:28.960 --> 0:07:32.400 Ross Robertson, semi tolerable friend, Ross Robertson. Do remind the 0:07:32.440 --> 0:07:35.320 listeners how many years you've got in now guiding for 0:07:35.400 --> 0:07:38.840 the Wally's there on LA. You know, I don't know exactly, 0:07:38.880 --> 0:07:41.640 but it's either twenty one or twenty two. So I'm 0:07:41.760 --> 0:07:45.160 very excited to finally get a smooth move story from you, 0:07:45.200 --> 0:07:48.560 because I know there's many I've I've heard many, um, 0:07:48.560 --> 0:07:50.200 but you got one shot, so hit us with the 0:07:50.240 --> 0:07:52.480 best man. What do you got? I got a lot 0:07:52.480 --> 0:07:54.680 of them. Of some of them we probably couldn't talk 0:07:54.680 --> 0:07:56.840 on here because you guys are not PC. But let's 0:07:56.880 --> 0:07:58.440 just be honest. Some of these things ain't meant for 0:07:58.480 --> 0:08:01.320 nowhere or even a kid record by. But when people 0:08:01.320 --> 0:08:03.240 are drinking in the boat, it's a no go for me. 0:08:03.440 --> 0:08:06.160 You know, I'll drink one or a dozen with you, 0:08:06.520 --> 0:08:08.560 but I'm late down. You know, that's just a no go. 0:08:08.840 --> 0:08:10.960 So I'm out there fishing and I get a guy 0:08:11.000 --> 0:08:13.160 that I realized from somehow from time we took off 0:08:13.200 --> 0:08:15.560 till the time we basically set up. This dude is 0:08:15.640 --> 0:08:19.080 hitting a flask and he is snookered. So I basically 0:08:19.120 --> 0:08:20.800 canceled the day. Said kind of make a little bit 0:08:20.800 --> 0:08:24.040 of an excuse up just to you know, so you cut, 0:08:24.080 --> 0:08:27.160 you cut your day. He was bad enough, like, because 0:08:27.160 --> 0:08:28.760 I mean, this dude is he almost knocks me out 0:08:28.760 --> 0:08:30.040 of the boat. Soon as we're getting ready to set 0:08:30.080 --> 0:08:31.640 up a batch. It's a game over, like this is 0:08:31.680 --> 0:08:34.240 this is a bad deal. I'm sure my insurance guys 0:08:34.240 --> 0:08:37.600 cringing right now. So anyhow, I've burned them back in 0:08:37.840 --> 0:08:39.840 and it was middle of the week, and so there's 0:08:39.840 --> 0:08:42.720 like nobody really around where tie tie up at the dock. 0:08:42.840 --> 0:08:45.640 It's on a river. Kind of useful innovation for a second. 0:08:46.040 --> 0:08:48.440 So I literally run to get my truck. I turned 0:08:48.480 --> 0:08:50.319 around and look, and this guy's like, I can heat 0:08:50.320 --> 0:08:52.880 because it's not that far away. He is untying the 0:08:52.960 --> 0:08:56.280 ropes and he's like, oh clear. And the boat is 0:08:56.320 --> 0:08:59.719 now like banging and spiking down this river. Thankfully, there's 0:09:00.160 --> 0:09:04.000 tied you from the dog of the ram on a river. 0:09:04.120 --> 0:09:06.040 Now it's not good any place, but it's really bad 0:09:06.040 --> 0:09:07.680 and river, and it's also middle of the week. There's 0:09:07.720 --> 0:09:09.839 nobody around, Like I try to use launches where there's 0:09:09.880 --> 0:09:13.559 nobody around, right, So fortunately there's a courtesy doctor's I'm 0:09:13.559 --> 0:09:16.120 gonna say a hundred and some feet long. I literally run. 0:09:16.280 --> 0:09:17.839 I mean it was like a movie deal. I run 0:09:17.920 --> 0:09:22.160 like fest jump on the boat, literally almost breaking rods 0:09:22.160 --> 0:09:24.320 in the front deck. I get in the thing, get 0:09:24.320 --> 0:09:26.240 it under power, and tie it back up. As you 0:09:26.280 --> 0:09:29.439 can imagine, mega mega kissed at this point and about 0:09:29.600 --> 0:09:32.240 really done with life. So the other guy who is 0:09:32.280 --> 0:09:34.360 not snuckered, who's one of my regular guys and still 0:09:34.400 --> 0:09:37.559 fishes with me. He's like, already know, you know, he's 0:09:37.559 --> 0:09:39.360 just he's just he knows I'm about ready to go 0:09:39.400 --> 0:09:42.559 eight mode on this deal. So so now I get it, 0:09:42.600 --> 0:09:43.920 and I tell him, hey, listen, meet me on top 0:09:43.960 --> 0:09:45.719 of parking lot. We're gonna get your stuff out of 0:09:45.720 --> 0:09:47.840 the boat. I'm going home. Game over here. They're trying 0:09:47.840 --> 0:09:50.080 to take me to breakfast, lunch or whatever. I'm like done, 0:09:50.400 --> 0:09:52.920 pay me world, I'm because I don't want to go 0:09:52.960 --> 0:09:55.599 to jail. I'm gonna go home instead. So on the 0:09:55.679 --> 0:09:57.240 top of the deal here, I'm waiting. I can't find 0:09:57.280 --> 0:09:58.839 I don't see him. I don't see him, and now 0:09:58.880 --> 0:10:01.440 where he had to park with down a hundred yards 0:10:01.440 --> 0:10:03.160 away or something like that, and I'm looking, I don't 0:10:03.160 --> 0:10:04.880 see him, and I won't see him coming. So I'm like, 0:10:04.920 --> 0:10:07.000 screw it. I'm gonna drive my boat and truck in 0:10:07.000 --> 0:10:09.960 the car parking which is you know, there's barely there's 0:10:10.000 --> 0:10:11.400 not really a room turn around to do any of that. 0:10:11.440 --> 0:10:13.280 But I'm just like done over with this. So I 0:10:13.400 --> 0:10:15.480 drive down there and there's a little car in front 0:10:15.480 --> 0:10:18.000 of me, which I almost go ape shut on, and 0:10:18.040 --> 0:10:20.040 then I realized it's like some eight year old husband 0:10:20.040 --> 0:10:22.959 and wife. And I realized then that the wife is 0:10:23.000 --> 0:10:25.280 out and she's standing in front of a car. So 0:10:25.440 --> 0:10:27.160 I get out now, and I'm in a place it's 0:10:27.200 --> 0:10:29.280 like a semi in a you know, in a school 0:10:29.360 --> 0:10:32.120 parking lot, Like, I mean, this is logistically, this doesn't 0:10:32.160 --> 0:10:35.160 all work. And I look out and this woman it 0:10:35.200 --> 0:10:36.920 looks like she's having a heart attack. She has just 0:10:36.960 --> 0:10:40.080 like got her hand over. What's going on? Well, I 0:10:40.120 --> 0:10:42.839 look down and here's my dude laying flat on the 0:10:42.880 --> 0:10:45.080 ground in front of their car. And I'm like, did 0:10:45.080 --> 0:10:47.400 he get smoked? Did by the car? I mean, what's 0:10:47.400 --> 0:10:50.040 going on? And then I realized, like he's got this 0:10:50.080 --> 0:10:53.400 thing and he sits up and he's petting this dog. 0:10:53.760 --> 0:10:56.080 But all you can see is of rufus. Here is 0:10:56.120 --> 0:10:58.640 just this little tiny it looks like a lollipop in 0:10:58.720 --> 0:11:01.800 him because he's his arms are so big, he's like 0:11:01.960 --> 0:11:06.840 landing in it. From from my absolutely, he has this 0:11:06.920 --> 0:11:09.280 dog in a death grip but doesn't even realize it 0:11:09.280 --> 0:11:11.880 because he's that snickered, right, And this woman is like, 0:11:11.960 --> 0:11:14.720 oh my god. And I've got to basically go up 0:11:14.760 --> 0:11:16.280 there and be like, dude, let you let go of 0:11:16.320 --> 0:11:18.880 that dog, for I kick you and your dome and 0:11:19.320 --> 0:11:21.040 because this guy could kick the ship out all of us. 0:11:21.080 --> 0:11:24.000 I mean he's he's a big Yeah. Well hold on, 0:11:24.080 --> 0:11:28.640 hold on, I gotta I gotta check. Was the dog okay? Yeah? Well, 0:11:28.679 --> 0:11:31.640 I mean Evan a rufus apparently. I mean, I didn't 0:11:31.679 --> 0:11:34.880 do a vet check or anything out. But he went home. 0:11:35.240 --> 0:11:37.120 He got in the car with a nice little old lady. 0:11:37.360 --> 0:11:38.880 She did not have a heart attack. I think that 0:11:38.960 --> 0:11:40.880 was probably the biggest thing in this whole deal, because 0:11:41.080 --> 0:11:43.000 she literally looked like she was gonna have a heart 0:11:43.000 --> 0:11:46.160 attack because this was her prize little poodle. I gotta say, man, 0:11:46.720 --> 0:11:49.160 for all the ways that this story could have gone, 0:11:49.320 --> 0:11:51.280 it really ended as well as it could. You You 0:11:51.280 --> 0:11:55.320 you did the track star sprint and and leap dit 0:11:55.400 --> 0:11:58.680 your boat back, didn't take anybody out in the parking lot, 0:11:58.720 --> 0:12:01.720 the lady old lady didn't die, and the dog was okay. 0:12:02.000 --> 0:12:04.920 And best of all, you didn't get into fisticuffs with 0:12:04.960 --> 0:12:08.200 your client. I really couldn't have seen this ending any 0:12:08.240 --> 0:12:11.000 other way that that was positive. So I'd say that's 0:12:11.000 --> 0:12:13.480 what I like. Positive stuff. I mean, there are a 0:12:13.480 --> 0:12:17.959 few that might do you ensued positivity. Huh, yeah, there 0:12:18.000 --> 0:12:20.439 there's a few, but my my lawyer and my insurance 0:12:20.520 --> 0:12:23.040 agent suggested we not talk about it. So, I mean, 0:12:23.080 --> 0:12:28.480 I feel like that this is good. So just in 0:12:28.520 --> 0:12:30.600 case that one shook you to the core, in case 0:12:30.640 --> 0:12:32.520 you were on the edge of your seat worrying about 0:12:32.520 --> 0:12:35.920 the well being Rufous the poodle. Just in case I 0:12:36.000 --> 0:12:38.600 was a messed up story. Maybe it was. It was, 0:12:38.720 --> 0:12:41.480 so let's heal. Here's Carl Weathers to sing you back 0:12:41.480 --> 0:12:48.160 to a happy place. What about a rain Have you 0:12:48.320 --> 0:13:01.280 ever noted you're feeling aside when a rainbows sky. I 0:13:01.360 --> 0:13:05.640 do not feel healed. I do not feel put back together. 0:13:05.840 --> 0:13:09.160 I do not feel suit like of dude, of all 0:13:09.200 --> 0:13:12.439 the Carl Weather's clips, like you could have gone Rocky, 0:13:12.840 --> 0:13:16.000 you could have gone Predator, you could have gone Happy Gilmore, 0:13:16.520 --> 0:13:19.839 Hurricane Smith, and and you went with that. That was 0:13:19.880 --> 0:13:22.559 where you went. You know why? Because I stumbled onto 0:13:22.600 --> 0:13:26.079 it accidentally. And just first of all, we don't give 0:13:26.160 --> 0:13:30.559 enough credit to nineties SNL monologues, and just just based 0:13:30.559 --> 0:13:34.160 on watching Carl's nineties SML monologue, I'm sure that was 0:13:34.200 --> 0:13:36.960 a horrible episode of the show, Like it was a 0:13:37.080 --> 0:13:40.240 terrible monologue. I feel like they might have been hard 0:13:40.280 --> 0:13:41.800 up for people at the time, but I love the 0:13:41.840 --> 0:13:45.760 obscurity of it. That's why I chosen and and that's 0:13:45.800 --> 0:13:47.960 where I have to I do have to give you credit, 0:13:48.160 --> 0:13:50.920 because I'm giving you full points for not being obvious. 0:13:50.960 --> 0:13:54.320 That was not where I would have gone at all. 0:13:54.600 --> 0:13:58.920 And credit there, And you know what, I'm I'm gonna 0:13:58.920 --> 0:14:00.600 thank you because you kind of teach me up. Because 0:14:00.640 --> 0:14:03.240 the book that I'm gonna drop in this week's installment 0:14:03.240 --> 0:14:06.440 of Freaking Philistines is also not the obvious choice, though 0:14:06.480 --> 0:14:09.480 it is one of the best essay collections I've read 0:14:09.480 --> 0:14:12.319 in a long time. What's a fast team. It's a 0:14:12.360 --> 0:14:14.960 guy who doesn't care about books or interesting films and 0:14:15.000 --> 0:14:21.480 things and unfast team. I love a good essay collection. 0:14:22.000 --> 0:14:25.720 It's kind of like the tinder of literature. Reading a 0:14:25.800 --> 0:14:29.080 single essay doesn't require much commitment. You can grab a 0:14:29.120 --> 0:14:32.440 cup of coffee, share a few minutes of conversation, and 0:14:32.480 --> 0:14:35.480 then get on with your day. Or maybe you're having 0:14:35.480 --> 0:14:39.000 a good time coffee turns into lunch and you set 0:14:39.000 --> 0:14:42.000 the book aside after several hours, already looking forward to 0:14:42.000 --> 0:14:46.320 the next date or coffee rolls into lunch, after which 0:14:46.520 --> 0:14:49.240 you lose track of time completely. Take the book to 0:14:49.320 --> 0:14:53.240 bed with you and devour the whole thing. I appreciate 0:14:53.280 --> 0:14:57.120 options good chance. I'll review many essay collections, but I'm 0:14:57.160 --> 0:15:00.920 starting out with one that's kind of underground Fish Like 0:15:01.000 --> 0:15:04.840 You Mean It by David Zobe. I'll be the first 0:15:04.880 --> 0:15:07.480 to admit that the title leaves something to be desired, 0:15:07.600 --> 0:15:10.920 and the copy could have used a more stringent editor. 0:15:11.440 --> 0:15:14.320 But if you can set those two criticisms aside, you'll 0:15:14.360 --> 0:15:17.000 get to experience one of the best fishing books you've 0:15:17.040 --> 0:15:20.280 never heard of. The book spans most of Zobie's life, 0:15:20.640 --> 0:15:25.000 a series of vignettes, held together by two strands, fishing 0:15:25.840 --> 0:15:30.160 and the attendant strange characters he attracts, from his Lebanese 0:15:30.200 --> 0:15:34.240 family on the Virginia Coast to his contemporary itinerant ramblings 0:15:34.240 --> 0:15:37.480 in Homer, Alaska. Zobi collects a cast of people too 0:15:37.480 --> 0:15:41.520 eclectic to be entirely fictional, and fishing tales too humble 0:15:41.800 --> 0:15:45.480 to be made up. That humility is really my favorite 0:15:45.480 --> 0:15:49.120 aspect of Zobie's writing. Too many authors, especially those of us, 0:15:49.120 --> 0:15:53.120 who write about conquest pursuits like fishing and hunting, use 0:15:53.200 --> 0:15:57.080 the space between covers to argue their dominance or show 0:15:57.120 --> 0:16:00.440 off superior skill. You'll find none of that here. Mostly 0:16:00.760 --> 0:16:02.760 you'll find a person trying to make sense of his 0:16:02.840 --> 0:16:07.320 own major tragedies and minor successes through fishing. His family's 0:16:07.360 --> 0:16:10.800 immigrant shame, the decay of his hometown after the closing 0:16:10.840 --> 0:16:14.600 of shipyards, the sting of giving away fishing secrets to 0:16:14.640 --> 0:16:19.960 sell tackle, a disappointing career, a doomed relationship, a series 0:16:19.960 --> 0:16:23.200 of canine companions that just never lasts long enough. It 0:16:23.280 --> 0:16:29.000 sounds depressing, I know, but it's not. Zobe gets his 0:16:29.080 --> 0:16:31.920 readers through all that heaviness the same way he gets 0:16:31.920 --> 0:16:37.360 through it exceptional fishing stories featuring fascinating supporting characters, though 0:16:37.640 --> 0:16:40.400 to be fair, he throws in some great duck hunting 0:16:40.440 --> 0:16:44.840 stories too. Every time the narrative starts to feel like 0:16:45.160 --> 0:16:49.360 really sad, you're transported to a wyoming river or an 0:16:49.400 --> 0:16:52.040 Alaskan beach with a rod in your hands and a 0:16:52.120 --> 0:16:54.680 dog at your heels, waiting to chase salmon or trout 0:16:54.800 --> 0:16:58.600 or seals or sticks. Anyone who has ever felt fishing 0:16:58.640 --> 0:17:02.480 become escapism and perhaps wondered at what point it tips 0:17:02.480 --> 0:17:05.800 from being a healthy outdoor pursuit to a self destructive 0:17:05.800 --> 0:17:09.920 avoidance tactic will relate to this book, but it's not 0:17:10.040 --> 0:17:14.600 all deep water naval gazing. Zobe also turns his razored 0:17:14.680 --> 0:17:18.640 critiques outward from time to time, as in this section 0:17:18.640 --> 0:17:23.679 of an essay titled at the Cabella's. The story of 0:17:23.720 --> 0:17:26.679 Cabella's is one of the true rags to riches tails 0:17:26.720 --> 0:17:31.919 woven into the fabric of Americana. In Dick Cabella was 0:17:31.960 --> 0:17:34.560 working at his parents furniture store in Nebraska when he 0:17:34.600 --> 0:17:37.560 accompanied his father in Chicago with a purpose to buy 0:17:37.680 --> 0:17:41.760 more inventory in a water damage warehouse. He stumbled upon 0:17:41.840 --> 0:17:45.600 some cheap hand tiede flies from Japan. He knew they 0:17:45.600 --> 0:17:48.520 were too cheap to pass up, so he bought several thousand. 0:17:49.000 --> 0:17:52.640 His first ad ran in the Casper Tribune. Only one 0:17:52.680 --> 0:17:57.320 person answered. His next ad ran in Field and Stream. 0:17:57.359 --> 0:18:03.560 It read five hand tied fishing flies free postage. In 0:18:03.600 --> 0:18:07.320 handling this ad did the trick, Dick and Mary Cabella 0:18:07.400 --> 0:18:10.040 spent their free time filling out orders on their kitchen table. 0:18:10.840 --> 0:18:13.639 They collected the names and addresses of their first customers 0:18:13.640 --> 0:18:18.560 on recipe cards and sent them future offers. Regrettably, these 0:18:18.600 --> 0:18:23.639 were the first catalogs, the birth of a revolution. The 0:18:23.680 --> 0:18:26.119 flies in the postage to send them back to customers 0:18:26.160 --> 0:18:28.960 only cost the Cabella's fourteen cents, so they made a 0:18:28.960 --> 0:18:33.560 profit of eleven cents on each order they filled. There 0:18:33.560 --> 0:18:36.320 really were no free flies. There never were. This was 0:18:36.359 --> 0:18:40.040 the humble beginning of America's biggest outdoor gear company, the 0:18:40.080 --> 0:18:45.159 world's foremost outfitter we know today. While wandering around in 0:18:45.160 --> 0:18:48.159 search of the canine department, I found an Alaskan moose. 0:18:48.720 --> 0:18:51.119 He was a full body mountain. His paddles were the 0:18:51.119 --> 0:18:54.479 color of maple syrup. The hide seemed large enough to 0:18:54.520 --> 0:18:57.879 project a movie on his flanks. He was standing in 0:18:57.880 --> 0:19:01.800 a tumbling stream beside faue bowls, and to my amazement, 0:19:02.040 --> 0:19:04.679 there were actual rainbow trout in the stream, weaving in 0:19:04.760 --> 0:19:07.720 and out of the moose's spindly legs. I peered over 0:19:07.720 --> 0:19:09.679 what passed is a beaver dam and looked down at 0:19:09.680 --> 0:19:12.960 the fish. They were large for rainbows, some of them 0:19:12.960 --> 0:19:15.359 pushing twenty inches or so, the kind of fish you 0:19:15.440 --> 0:19:17.760 catch on the North plattin March if you can stand 0:19:17.800 --> 0:19:20.720 the wind and the cold, the tannic smell of the creek, 0:19:20.880 --> 0:19:24.040 the raw exposed. Scent of rot and fish struck me 0:19:24.040 --> 0:19:27.399 as original. A large man grazing on peanut brittle he 0:19:27.480 --> 0:19:30.720 had just purchased, leaned over beside me and looked down too. 0:19:31.680 --> 0:19:34.719 Those are some niceens, he said. A bit of brittle 0:19:34.800 --> 0:19:36.919 fell from his mouth, and the trout scrambled for it. 0:19:37.560 --> 0:19:41.119 The spell was broken, just like that. But that is 0:19:41.160 --> 0:19:46.120 the danger of semilacra. The experience itself. Just walking into 0:19:46.160 --> 0:19:50.280 the store has become the outing the goal. Going to 0:19:50.359 --> 0:19:53.720 the Cabella's replaces the need to climb mountain er find 0:19:53.720 --> 0:19:58.200 a grossbeak in your binoculars. A trip to Cabella's, any Cabella's, 0:19:58.480 --> 0:20:01.720 does not ask that you risk squitoes or a night 0:20:01.760 --> 0:20:04.520 on the uncomfortable ground. It only asked that you shop 0:20:05.000 --> 0:20:08.679 drowsy lee impulsively. It asks that you sign up for 0:20:08.720 --> 0:20:12.800 the instore newsletter, a Cabella's credit card. It asks that 0:20:12.880 --> 0:20:15.639 you fill your cards in your arms with products, that 0:20:15.720 --> 0:20:19.399 you haul them away happily and contented, as if the 0:20:19.440 --> 0:20:23.840 adventure is within these vaultage showrooms, not some other place without. 0:20:24.560 --> 0:20:27.520 You won't find this book at your local bookstore, unfortunately, 0:20:27.640 --> 0:20:30.040 so you'll have to turn to the Cabella's of the 0:20:30.040 --> 0:20:33.800 book world, good old Amazon to get a copy. Once 0:20:33.800 --> 0:20:36.600 you get past that unpleasantness, though, I think you'll only 0:20:36.640 --> 0:20:38.880 be disappointed when you find yourself staring at the back 0:20:38.920 --> 0:20:46.680 cover wishing there was another essay to read. I gotta admit, no, Lie, 0:20:46.720 --> 0:20:49.960 that book sounds incredible, and you you did pick the 0:20:50.080 --> 0:20:53.879 perfect passage because I can relate to that so much, 0:20:53.920 --> 0:20:57.480 and it's so terrible that he's right, you know what 0:20:57.520 --> 0:21:00.760 I'm saying. Like, when the Cabella's first opened up out 0:21:00.760 --> 0:21:04.400 here in Pennsylvania, people set up campers in the parking lot, 0:21:04.960 --> 0:21:08.640 like they came for the weekend to the Cabella's instead 0:21:08.640 --> 0:21:12.280 of filling the camper into the wild. Absolutely yeah. And 0:21:12.320 --> 0:21:15.440 every time I'd go out there, there'd be another restaurant 0:21:15.720 --> 0:21:18.600 built up or another shopping center. It's just like all 0:21:18.640 --> 0:21:21.320 these things sprouted around that, and you just come spend 0:21:21.320 --> 0:21:24.480 the weekend at the Capella's. That's what she did. I 0:21:24.520 --> 0:21:28.000 could never figure it out. Um kind of related. My 0:21:28.040 --> 0:21:30.800 wife visited that Capella's with me exactly one time, and 0:21:30.840 --> 0:21:34.000 her takeaway was that she had probably never walked through 0:21:34.000 --> 0:21:38.280 as many fart clouds in a single day before. That 0:21:38.400 --> 0:21:42.320 was what she took away from from Capella's well, Peanut 0:21:42.320 --> 0:21:44.679 Bridle and hot dogs are not good for That's what 0:21:44.720 --> 0:21:48.080 I'll say. Um, and man like Dave nailed it on 0:21:48.119 --> 0:21:52.359