1 00:00:02,360 --> 00:00:16,320 Speaker 1: Radio Radio Radio comis a myth and Bullshit, a radio 2 00:00:16,400 --> 00:00:23,320 Speaker 1: phonic novella Local Radio hosted by Malamuno and welcome back 3 00:00:23,360 --> 00:00:26,120 Speaker 1: to look At Radio. This is ther S FM. This 4 00:00:26,200 --> 00:00:31,320 Speaker 1: is Malalla, Welcome back, Welcome back to local radio where 5 00:00:31,400 --> 00:00:34,720 Speaker 1: we celebrate the brilliance and legacies of women and fems 6 00:00:34,720 --> 00:00:39,000 Speaker 1: of color. This is another installment of Brown Girl Hour, 7 00:00:39,479 --> 00:00:44,559 Speaker 1: and I cannot wait to dive in. Yes, this is 8 00:00:44,600 --> 00:00:54,840 Speaker 1: capitulo thing. Yeah, that's a mouthful. You're so funny. But no, like, 9 00:00:55,120 --> 00:00:57,600 Speaker 1: there's so much to talk about. There's so much going on. 10 00:00:57,720 --> 00:01:00,880 Speaker 1: So much has happened since we've last oaken, since our 11 00:01:00,920 --> 00:01:04,240 Speaker 1: last which I hope you all enjoyed. Yes, it was 12 00:01:04,319 --> 00:01:06,880 Speaker 1: so much fun to record that one, to engage with 13 00:01:06,920 --> 00:01:11,440 Speaker 1: y'all online to see the responses. One of my favorites. Actually, 14 00:01:11,440 --> 00:01:13,880 Speaker 1: I'm going to pull it up was one of our listeners. 15 00:01:14,160 --> 00:01:18,080 Speaker 1: I believe she lives in the house. Um, you know 16 00:01:18,120 --> 00:01:20,200 Speaker 1: what I'm talking about. Yes, let me pull that up 17 00:01:20,200 --> 00:01:24,880 Speaker 1: at let's see the language. No, Um, there has been 18 00:01:24,920 --> 00:01:27,600 Speaker 1: so much going on in the world, in our lives, 19 00:01:27,920 --> 00:01:31,440 Speaker 1: um that we want to catch everybody up on. Well, 20 00:01:31,480 --> 00:01:33,360 Speaker 1: we're going to talk about today and We'll get into 21 00:01:33,400 --> 00:01:36,440 Speaker 1: the actual content in a bit, but we're talking about 22 00:01:36,520 --> 00:01:41,280 Speaker 1: fem defense. Don't leak my nudes. Addition, yes, because this 23 00:01:41,319 --> 00:01:43,920 Speaker 1: is really relevant right now. As you all know, Rob 24 00:01:44,000 --> 00:01:48,440 Speaker 1: Kardashian was basically participating in revenge porn against Black China 25 00:01:48,960 --> 00:01:50,680 Speaker 1: and posted her nudes online. So we're going to talk 26 00:01:50,720 --> 00:01:53,680 Speaker 1: about that. That's our topic for today. Um, but we 27 00:01:53,720 --> 00:01:56,080 Speaker 1: also wanted to shout out Yes, I want to shout 28 00:01:56,080 --> 00:01:59,680 Speaker 1: out Vernic Raides. She tweeted at us that she was 29 00:01:59,760 --> 00:02:04,120 Speaker 1: listen to Radio Multidimensional Home in the car with her 30 00:02:04,120 --> 00:02:07,120 Speaker 1: seventeen year old daughter, and she says, grateful for this 31 00:02:07,160 --> 00:02:09,920 Speaker 1: episode helps me be a better mom. I love it, 32 00:02:10,240 --> 00:02:13,120 Speaker 1: absolutely love it. I love that we have listeners listening 33 00:02:13,120 --> 00:02:17,520 Speaker 1: with their daughters, with their brima's sisters, family members, friends, everyone, 34 00:02:17,760 --> 00:02:20,880 Speaker 1: a community event, A radiophonic novel. It's a radiophonic novella, 35 00:02:21,000 --> 00:02:24,320 Speaker 1: like people are coming together and talking about being a home. 36 00:02:25,400 --> 00:02:28,480 Speaker 1: Don't make my nudes. I think it's great, Yes, being 37 00:02:28,480 --> 00:02:30,760 Speaker 1: a loca, being a loca. So thank you guys for 38 00:02:30,840 --> 00:02:33,440 Speaker 1: joining us, for showing us love, and for sharing your 39 00:02:33,480 --> 00:02:36,160 Speaker 1: hoe tips with us. Yes, there were so many good ones. 40 00:02:36,560 --> 00:02:38,919 Speaker 1: There were a lot. There were very details. They were 41 00:02:39,000 --> 00:02:41,840 Speaker 1: very detailed. Y'all put some a lot of thoughts as 42 00:02:41,880 --> 00:02:47,480 Speaker 1: you showed extensive tensional howing, very intentional howing, very extensive planning, 43 00:02:48,240 --> 00:02:51,440 Speaker 1: you know, really well prepared ho kids. So basically, there 44 00:02:51,480 --> 00:02:53,440 Speaker 1: are so many I was just very impressed that there's 45 00:02:53,440 --> 00:02:55,520 Speaker 1: so many more heads out here who are just ready 46 00:02:55,560 --> 00:02:58,320 Speaker 1: for anything in any situation. You know what. I felt 47 00:02:58,320 --> 00:03:01,160 Speaker 1: like one of the common ones with carrying an extra 48 00:03:01,200 --> 00:03:05,240 Speaker 1: set of panties, which I actually never do. And I'm 49 00:03:05,240 --> 00:03:08,079 Speaker 1: going to add that to the list of necessities. That's 50 00:03:08,080 --> 00:03:10,760 Speaker 1: a good one. Yeah, I thought it was interesting. One listener, 51 00:03:12,000 --> 00:03:15,840 Speaker 1: amongst her other accouterments, said that she also takes a 52 00:03:15,880 --> 00:03:21,560 Speaker 1: pen and paper in her like specifically, and I'm wondering why. Yeah, 53 00:03:21,600 --> 00:03:24,640 Speaker 1: I'm just curious. Let us I think it's interesting. Yeah, 54 00:03:25,160 --> 00:03:28,400 Speaker 1: thank you. Yeah. Um. So before we get into our topics, 55 00:03:28,400 --> 00:03:30,840 Speaker 1: we also, of course we want to do some housekeeping. 56 00:03:30,880 --> 00:03:33,079 Speaker 1: We always like to shout out, um, some of our 57 00:03:33,120 --> 00:03:37,119 Speaker 1: listeners or folks that were working with. So first off, 58 00:03:37,120 --> 00:03:39,640 Speaker 1: we want to shout out Chelsea Monneau from the University 59 00:03:39,680 --> 00:03:43,720 Speaker 1: of the House Austin. She is a journey she's getting 60 00:03:43,720 --> 00:03:48,040 Speaker 1: her degree in journalism and she's working with like Latino. 61 00:03:48,440 --> 00:03:52,480 Speaker 1: I believe it's like a Hispanic publication quote Hispanic um. 62 00:03:52,520 --> 00:03:55,520 Speaker 1: And she's actually doing a feature on and framing it 63 00:03:55,600 --> 00:03:57,920 Speaker 1: around mental health. So we will let you all know 64 00:03:57,960 --> 00:04:01,400 Speaker 1: when that's available. But we're really thankful to Chelsea that 65 00:04:01,520 --> 00:04:04,720 Speaker 1: she messaged us that she's working with us and wants 66 00:04:04,720 --> 00:04:06,960 Speaker 1: to do a feature on us. She was really sweet's 67 00:04:07,040 --> 00:04:10,360 Speaker 1: very sweet. Um. Also, if you're at a university a 68 00:04:10,480 --> 00:04:14,120 Speaker 1: college and you would like to take us there, invite 69 00:04:14,200 --> 00:04:18,440 Speaker 1: us available, invite us over, fly us out, you know, 70 00:04:18,920 --> 00:04:23,360 Speaker 1: fly us out. We've done a couple of university engagements 71 00:04:23,560 --> 00:04:27,000 Speaker 1: so far. We've done UC Santa Barbara, U C l A. Yes, 72 00:04:27,080 --> 00:04:30,320 Speaker 1: we've done a few conferences at PCC. We were at PCC. 73 00:04:30,960 --> 00:04:33,839 Speaker 1: So we want to do more, you know, like from 74 00:04:33,880 --> 00:04:37,960 Speaker 1: the Academy. Absolutely, we have a pending one for next year. 75 00:04:39,360 --> 00:04:42,040 Speaker 1: We can't tell you, I know, I don't know, you 76 00:04:42,040 --> 00:04:46,080 Speaker 1: know how we are so excited. Okay, anyways, moving on, 77 00:04:46,160 --> 00:04:50,719 Speaker 1: moving on, take it away mon so um. We also 78 00:04:50,880 --> 00:04:56,000 Speaker 1: had another really exciting collaboration basically one of our beloved followers, 79 00:04:56,480 --> 00:05:02,920 Speaker 1: d Damari. She is rape crisis and domestic violence advocate, 80 00:05:02,920 --> 00:05:06,200 Speaker 1: a survivor advocate like I am. UM. She lives and 81 00:05:06,240 --> 00:05:09,480 Speaker 1: works in Pennsylvania, and she also she's really active online. 82 00:05:09,480 --> 00:05:15,120 Speaker 1: She's do UM and she also blogs for the Stop 83 00:05:15,320 --> 00:05:19,680 Speaker 1: Street Harassment campaign and she recently reached out to us 84 00:05:19,760 --> 00:05:21,479 Speaker 1: because you know, she's a listener. She listens to the 85 00:05:21,480 --> 00:05:25,279 Speaker 1: podcast and she wanted to write a podcast, UM, a 86 00:05:25,360 --> 00:05:29,240 Speaker 1: blog entry about our LA on fem defense and street 87 00:05:29,240 --> 00:05:32,279 Speaker 1: harassment and how we respond to it, how we protect 88 00:05:32,279 --> 00:05:36,520 Speaker 1: ourselves from it. So we will. We posted it on 89 00:05:36,560 --> 00:05:38,760 Speaker 1: the on the Instagram, so go ahead and take a read. 90 00:05:38,839 --> 00:05:42,280 Speaker 1: De Rodriguez Um. She wrote this beautiful article about her 91 00:05:42,320 --> 00:05:46,440 Speaker 1: experiences with street harassment. UM. Latina's Latino people in street 92 00:05:46,480 --> 00:05:52,120 Speaker 1: harassment and sexual harassment. So so definitely give it a read. UM, 93 00:05:52,320 --> 00:05:55,400 Speaker 1: show it some love, share it with your friends, and yeah, 94 00:05:55,480 --> 00:05:58,240 Speaker 1: thank you so much, thank you, tomorrow you We love you, 95 00:05:58,960 --> 00:06:01,160 Speaker 1: Thank you so much. We also recently did a photo 96 00:06:01,240 --> 00:06:04,080 Speaker 1: shoot with me Viva, so it was so much fun. 97 00:06:04,320 --> 00:06:08,520 Speaker 1: We did it in Lincoln Heights and it was a 98 00:06:08,520 --> 00:06:13,080 Speaker 1: lot of fun. It was so hot, but it was great. Um. Yeah, 99 00:06:13,160 --> 00:06:17,599 Speaker 1: our lovely friend Arianna did the photos did the photos, UM, 100 00:06:17,839 --> 00:06:22,840 Speaker 1: and I think you guys have seen there's we posted 101 00:06:22,880 --> 00:06:25,000 Speaker 1: a f you've seen a few of them, but there's 102 00:06:25,040 --> 00:06:27,640 Speaker 1: more coming. There's more, there's more. We're gonna be taking 103 00:06:27,680 --> 00:06:30,279 Speaker 1: a lot more photos. Actually, we're gonna have a whole 104 00:06:30,279 --> 00:06:33,240 Speaker 1: new set of photos coming up. Yes, we love taking 105 00:06:33,279 --> 00:06:41,000 Speaker 1: we you know. Um. And then finally, Mala went to 106 00:06:41,000 --> 00:06:43,880 Speaker 1: an event last night with our friends, so she wanted 107 00:06:43,920 --> 00:06:46,040 Speaker 1: to talk a little bit about that. Yeah. Just there's 108 00:06:46,040 --> 00:06:48,800 Speaker 1: this really fun party um that takes place on Friday 109 00:06:48,880 --> 00:06:53,840 Speaker 1: nights at Dorado, which is in downtown on Spring Street. Um, 110 00:06:54,000 --> 00:06:56,760 Speaker 1: and the people who put together the La Junta party 111 00:06:57,279 --> 00:07:00,080 Speaker 1: also put together this party and it's called Beenya and 112 00:07:00,120 --> 00:07:04,400 Speaker 1: it's on Fridays and it's really fun, um delicious drinks. 113 00:07:04,760 --> 00:07:06,600 Speaker 1: You know, there's a lot going on on Spring Street. 114 00:07:06,680 --> 00:07:09,239 Speaker 1: So that's where we went last night, me and Sona. 115 00:07:09,640 --> 00:07:12,120 Speaker 1: We had a great time and we saw we saw 116 00:07:12,160 --> 00:07:14,720 Speaker 1: the people out and so shouts out to whoever we 117 00:07:14,720 --> 00:07:19,280 Speaker 1: saw and said hello too, that's awesome, that's awesome. Good. Well, yeah, 118 00:07:19,400 --> 00:07:23,360 Speaker 1: so stay tuned for in the future, we will be 119 00:07:23,440 --> 00:07:27,720 Speaker 1: doing another collaboration with h Yeah, so keep your eyes peeled. 120 00:07:28,640 --> 00:07:31,240 Speaker 1: We're six months deep, you know, I think more like 121 00:07:31,520 --> 00:07:35,200 Speaker 1: seven eight months, oh into our po podcast. Oh yeah, 122 00:07:35,240 --> 00:07:38,160 Speaker 1: it's creeping up on a year. It is, so we 123 00:07:38,240 --> 00:07:41,360 Speaker 1: will have some exciting news in the future, in the 124 00:07:41,360 --> 00:07:44,600 Speaker 1: near future, near future. Yeah, alright, so are we ready? 125 00:07:45,680 --> 00:07:50,640 Speaker 1: It ready? It? So? Have y'all been keeping up with Kardassian, 126 00:07:50,800 --> 00:07:57,480 Speaker 1: Black China and Kardashian Internet? Oh my god, it's a 127 00:07:57,480 --> 00:08:02,280 Speaker 1: hot mess. The family is a mess. The dynamics are 128 00:08:02,320 --> 00:08:06,320 Speaker 1: so bizarre and stressful. It just seems like a stressful 129 00:08:06,360 --> 00:08:09,000 Speaker 1: last family to be a part of and then to 130 00:08:09,520 --> 00:08:13,000 Speaker 1: become a part of, because Black China has become a 131 00:08:13,080 --> 00:08:15,400 Speaker 1: part of their family permanently, because she has a child 132 00:08:15,480 --> 00:08:21,280 Speaker 1: with Rob Kardashian. You know. So what happened. Rob Kardashian 133 00:08:22,000 --> 00:08:25,120 Speaker 1: has been a bad guy, a bad boy in a 134 00:08:25,160 --> 00:08:30,080 Speaker 1: bad way. He posted leaked Black China's nude photos on 135 00:08:30,200 --> 00:08:34,079 Speaker 1: Instagram and on Twitter and wherever else, and he was 136 00:08:34,120 --> 00:08:36,560 Speaker 1: talking a lot of shit about her. Um, I guess 137 00:08:37,000 --> 00:08:39,000 Speaker 1: you know, she's been hooking up with other people and 138 00:08:39,080 --> 00:08:41,839 Speaker 1: doing her thing. And she's an adult, and they're two adults, 139 00:08:41,880 --> 00:08:44,360 Speaker 1: you know, and they have separate lives at this point. 140 00:08:44,400 --> 00:08:48,800 Speaker 1: I don't think they're together anymore, you know. And so yeah, 141 00:08:48,960 --> 00:08:53,400 Speaker 1: Rob basically violated her trust and distributed pictures of her 142 00:08:53,480 --> 00:08:57,240 Speaker 1: without her consent on the Internet. And now it's actually 143 00:08:57,280 --> 00:09:00,520 Speaker 1: at the point where Black China has high an attorney, 144 00:09:00,559 --> 00:09:03,640 Speaker 1: Lisa Bloom, who was actually Gloria Alred's daughter. I had 145 00:09:03,640 --> 00:09:07,640 Speaker 1: no idea. Oh yes, oh yes, they have like a dynasty. Oh, 146 00:09:07,720 --> 00:09:11,360 Speaker 1: I believe it a legal dynasty. Um. And so Lisa 147 00:09:11,360 --> 00:09:15,000 Speaker 1: Bloom is representing her. They recently went to court, um, 148 00:09:15,080 --> 00:09:18,760 Speaker 1: and Black China was granted a temporary domestic violence restraining order. 149 00:09:19,080 --> 00:09:22,120 Speaker 1: And I think Rob Kardashian, his attorney, I think, came 150 00:09:22,120 --> 00:09:25,000 Speaker 1: out with a statement. I believe that Rob has agreed 151 00:09:25,120 --> 00:09:28,400 Speaker 1: basically to like the stipulations of a restraining order, agreed 152 00:09:28,440 --> 00:09:31,400 Speaker 1: to stay away from her good and has like in 153 00:09:31,440 --> 00:09:35,360 Speaker 1: some way apologized. But so let's talk about this because 154 00:09:35,520 --> 00:09:37,600 Speaker 1: we've been seeing a lot of people basically saying I 155 00:09:37,600 --> 00:09:39,679 Speaker 1: didn't know the term revenge porn. I didn't know where 156 00:09:39,679 --> 00:09:42,079 Speaker 1: avenge porn was a thing. How is this revenge porn? 157 00:09:42,520 --> 00:09:46,360 Speaker 1: If she has been an erotic dancer, a stripper, if 158 00:09:46,400 --> 00:09:50,920 Speaker 1: she's post nude before, Yeah, I've seen I saw like, um, 159 00:09:51,160 --> 00:09:54,240 Speaker 1: like a meme or something, just one of those Instagram, 160 00:09:54,800 --> 00:09:58,679 Speaker 1: um Twitter post and it's like a video of Black 161 00:09:58,760 --> 00:10:02,640 Speaker 1: China and she's danced, saying she's completely nude and she's dancing, 162 00:10:02,760 --> 00:10:05,320 Speaker 1: and then the cat like the the top of the 163 00:10:05,360 --> 00:10:08,479 Speaker 1: post is something like, oh, how come this is okay? 164 00:10:08,520 --> 00:10:12,520 Speaker 1: But posting her nudes isn't. Well, she was a dancer, 165 00:10:12,760 --> 00:10:16,079 Speaker 1: that was her job. She was working. You know, at 166 00:10:16,080 --> 00:10:18,400 Speaker 1: sub establishments you can have phones, and it's at some 167 00:10:18,679 --> 00:10:22,000 Speaker 1: you cannot, right, So whatever the case is for that one, 168 00:10:22,080 --> 00:10:25,000 Speaker 1: like she was working and she being naked was a 169 00:10:25,040 --> 00:10:27,880 Speaker 1: part of her job, and him violating her trust and 170 00:10:27,920 --> 00:10:31,240 Speaker 1: her going against her consent, it is not the same thing. 171 00:10:31,320 --> 00:10:34,280 Speaker 1: And it's it's really troubling to see not only men 172 00:10:34,320 --> 00:10:39,320 Speaker 1: but also women online commenting like, well, she deserves it, 173 00:10:39,400 --> 00:10:41,719 Speaker 1: like she was cheating, she was this, she was that, 174 00:10:41,880 --> 00:10:46,240 Speaker 1: But nobody's privacy should be violated, you know, And it's like, 175 00:10:46,400 --> 00:10:50,520 Speaker 1: you know, it's so strange to me how people refuse 176 00:10:50,720 --> 00:10:54,480 Speaker 1: to allow women like consent and autonomy and decision making 177 00:10:54,480 --> 00:10:57,440 Speaker 1: power over our own bodies. Like people do not want 178 00:10:57,520 --> 00:11:00,440 Speaker 1: us to have control over our own bodies. They It's 179 00:11:00,480 --> 00:11:04,280 Speaker 1: so strange, you know, Like Black China wanted to work 180 00:11:04,360 --> 00:11:07,199 Speaker 1: in that capacity or that was her option at the time, right, 181 00:11:07,360 --> 00:11:10,200 Speaker 1: and she was consenting to doing that and to dancing. 182 00:11:10,559 --> 00:11:13,040 Speaker 1: So that's okay because it's her body and she can 183 00:11:13,080 --> 00:11:17,559 Speaker 1: do whatever she wants. But people like to excuse, you know, 184 00:11:17,720 --> 00:11:21,559 Speaker 1: like betrayal of women's trust and like betrayal of women's privacy. 185 00:11:21,600 --> 00:11:25,000 Speaker 1: People make up excuses for it, right they do. You know, 186 00:11:25,120 --> 00:11:27,840 Speaker 1: in our last I made, I made a reference to 187 00:11:28,080 --> 00:11:32,079 Speaker 1: a a Twitter post that I referenced it, and I 188 00:11:32,120 --> 00:11:34,240 Speaker 1: said that it really stuck with me, and I actually 189 00:11:34,240 --> 00:11:36,280 Speaker 1: went back and I looked for it because I really 190 00:11:36,280 --> 00:11:39,280 Speaker 1: wanted to. I thought that it was still relevant to 191 00:11:39,280 --> 00:11:44,000 Speaker 1: today's so let me pull that up. Um. But you know, 192 00:11:44,040 --> 00:11:48,320 Speaker 1: basically in in the same the same sentiment, like they're 193 00:11:48,320 --> 00:11:51,800 Speaker 1: really it's really like people cannot grasp that a woman 194 00:11:52,080 --> 00:11:56,760 Speaker 1: can do whatever she wants, but she has every right 195 00:11:56,840 --> 00:11:59,200 Speaker 1: to make any decision that she wants. And you know 196 00:11:59,240 --> 00:12:01,600 Speaker 1: that phrase, you give them an inch, they'll take a mile. 197 00:12:02,160 --> 00:12:05,720 Speaker 1: That's how people interact with women's bodies, with fem bodies, 198 00:12:05,760 --> 00:12:08,800 Speaker 1: I would say, with queer bodies also, and excusing violence 199 00:12:08,840 --> 00:12:13,040 Speaker 1: against these people, these groups of people because it's like, okay, 200 00:12:13,080 --> 00:12:17,120 Speaker 1: so I posed nude once, so that means now that 201 00:12:17,160 --> 00:12:20,000 Speaker 1: you can do whatever you want with me to me 202 00:12:20,640 --> 00:12:22,840 Speaker 1: because I chose to do this one thing one time, 203 00:12:23,920 --> 00:12:26,920 Speaker 1: you know. Yeah, it's and it's no wonder that a 204 00:12:26,920 --> 00:12:30,640 Speaker 1: lot of women are very wary of doing things like 205 00:12:31,160 --> 00:12:33,640 Speaker 1: dating men or sending pictures to men because look at 206 00:12:33,679 --> 00:12:37,960 Speaker 1: how you all act like children. It's ridiculous. Children don't 207 00:12:38,160 --> 00:12:41,600 Speaker 1: even do this. It's ridiculous, you know, like it's malicious. 208 00:12:41,679 --> 00:12:45,920 Speaker 1: So basically to break it down right, especially for our 209 00:12:45,960 --> 00:12:50,280 Speaker 1: younger listeners, so that we're clear, you are your body 210 00:12:50,559 --> 00:12:55,600 Speaker 1: right once again, is yours, point blank period, and it's 211 00:12:55,679 --> 00:12:58,160 Speaker 1: it's not people don't get to vote about what happens 212 00:12:58,200 --> 00:12:59,679 Speaker 1: to your body and what you do to your body, 213 00:12:59,760 --> 00:13:02,800 Speaker 1: Like you can choose to share your body with others, 214 00:13:02,920 --> 00:13:06,240 Speaker 1: but it's for you. It's not up for debate, right, 215 00:13:06,600 --> 00:13:09,280 Speaker 1: you know, if you say no, it means no. It's 216 00:13:09,559 --> 00:13:11,880 Speaker 1: your body is a dictatorship and you're the dictator. It's 217 00:13:12,200 --> 00:13:16,440 Speaker 1: it's a queendom, like it's not a democracy if not. 218 00:13:16,840 --> 00:13:20,600 Speaker 1: You make the rules, you write the rules, you enforce them, 219 00:13:20,679 --> 00:13:22,680 Speaker 1: and it's I think it's really hard, especially when you're 220 00:13:22,720 --> 00:13:25,560 Speaker 1: young and you're you can feel like a pressure from 221 00:13:25,559 --> 00:13:28,240 Speaker 1: a partner to do something, whether we to send a 222 00:13:28,320 --> 00:13:33,160 Speaker 1: nude um to have sex with them or in whatever capacity. Um, 223 00:13:33,200 --> 00:13:36,800 Speaker 1: it's really common, and then those kinds of patterns continue 224 00:13:36,840 --> 00:13:40,959 Speaker 1: to cycle through relationships. Absolutely, it can be very like 225 00:13:41,440 --> 00:13:43,880 Speaker 1: that's a warning side, right, it's a red flag. And 226 00:13:43,880 --> 00:13:48,160 Speaker 1: we're going to talk more about basically UM FEM defense 227 00:13:48,920 --> 00:13:52,600 Speaker 1: and safety tips and tricks and red flags and warning 228 00:13:52,600 --> 00:13:54,720 Speaker 1: signs and what to do in ways to respond and 229 00:13:54,800 --> 00:13:57,480 Speaker 1: options if somebody does violate your trust and like your 230 00:13:57,559 --> 00:13:59,760 Speaker 1: nude and there are some tips and ways to keep 231 00:13:59,800 --> 00:14:01,800 Speaker 1: your helf safe, you know, and to kind of figure 232 00:14:01,800 --> 00:14:04,040 Speaker 1: out what if if you know, what the best option 233 00:14:04,160 --> 00:14:08,120 Speaker 1: is for you. But like me, like when I'm on 234 00:14:08,200 --> 00:14:11,959 Speaker 1: my my like emergency response shifts, like for work, when 235 00:14:11,960 --> 00:14:14,960 Speaker 1: I'm answering calls on the l A Rape and Battery hotline, 236 00:14:15,400 --> 00:14:18,240 Speaker 1: I get a good number of crisis calls from young 237 00:14:18,240 --> 00:14:21,120 Speaker 1: women who are you know, maybe they're in high school, 238 00:14:21,120 --> 00:14:24,360 Speaker 1: their teens, women in their twenties and adult women you know, 239 00:14:24,400 --> 00:14:27,480 Speaker 1: older women also, but the majority I would say are 240 00:14:27,560 --> 00:14:30,640 Speaker 1: like teenagers, young women with a lot of concerns and 241 00:14:30,640 --> 00:14:33,440 Speaker 1: really scared and really nervous because they send pictures to 242 00:14:33,520 --> 00:14:36,400 Speaker 1: some guy and he's now holding their pictures hostage and 243 00:14:36,440 --> 00:14:39,160 Speaker 1: threatening to do things with them right, or to send 244 00:14:39,200 --> 00:14:41,200 Speaker 1: them to people, send them to the girls parents. And 245 00:14:41,240 --> 00:14:43,920 Speaker 1: these girls are very scared because what they don't want 246 00:14:43,960 --> 00:14:46,240 Speaker 1: their parents to know, because they're going to get in 247 00:14:46,240 --> 00:14:49,080 Speaker 1: trouble for sending nuts to a boy. And it's criminalized 248 00:14:49,120 --> 00:14:52,840 Speaker 1: that could be considered sending. Like when youth send pictures 249 00:14:52,840 --> 00:14:56,040 Speaker 1: even of themselves, it's criminalized and it's considered almost like 250 00:14:56,080 --> 00:14:59,840 Speaker 1: distributing child pornography. So there's so much wrapped up in it. 251 00:14:59,840 --> 00:15:03,240 Speaker 1: It so difficult and complicated, and it makes sexuality and 252 00:15:03,280 --> 00:15:07,720 Speaker 1: like sharing sexuality with another person so complicated so taboo. 253 00:15:07,760 --> 00:15:11,320 Speaker 1: Also so taboo, because how do you seek help when 254 00:15:11,360 --> 00:15:13,480 Speaker 1: you're afraid of the stigma that you're going to get 255 00:15:13,480 --> 00:15:15,800 Speaker 1: in trouble for sending the needs to begin with, and 256 00:15:15,880 --> 00:15:19,000 Speaker 1: you're still being exposed and violated. Yeah, and I think 257 00:15:19,160 --> 00:15:23,400 Speaker 1: because of UM. Now we're in like a new media, right, 258 00:15:23,440 --> 00:15:25,920 Speaker 1: So now we have now we have the internet, now 259 00:15:25,920 --> 00:15:28,400 Speaker 1: we have smartphones and all these things. I actually found 260 00:15:28,400 --> 00:15:30,440 Speaker 1: that I shared with Mama. I found this video of 261 00:15:30,560 --> 00:15:35,440 Speaker 1: a head that she was um. I went to court 262 00:15:35,560 --> 00:15:37,880 Speaker 1: because she was seeing her ex boyfriend for the first 263 00:15:37,920 --> 00:15:40,080 Speaker 1: time and she was like filing a case I guess 264 00:15:40,160 --> 00:15:43,320 Speaker 1: like revenge porn because he distributed a video of her 265 00:15:43,640 --> 00:15:46,600 Speaker 1: and when, um, when this happened, she didn't know what 266 00:15:46,640 --> 00:15:48,600 Speaker 1: to do. So she called the police and she was like, 267 00:15:48,880 --> 00:15:51,080 Speaker 1: this is what's happening online? What do I do? And 268 00:15:51,120 --> 00:15:53,840 Speaker 1: they had no idea how to handle it. So I think, like, 269 00:15:54,160 --> 00:15:57,720 Speaker 1: even this situation with Black China and Rob Kardashian, it's 270 00:15:57,760 --> 00:16:00,760 Speaker 1: really setting a precedent. So, so what happened online and 271 00:16:00,800 --> 00:16:04,320 Speaker 1: how there are legal ramifications that we that you need 272 00:16:04,360 --> 00:16:07,080 Speaker 1: to consider, right, Oh, yeah, there's legal action that can 273 00:16:07,120 --> 00:16:10,440 Speaker 1: be if someone violates your trust and leaks your nudes 274 00:16:10,600 --> 00:16:13,400 Speaker 1: or leaks you know, personal information about you in an 275 00:16:13,400 --> 00:16:16,800 Speaker 1: a vengeful way. There are legal options. There are legal 276 00:16:16,840 --> 00:16:22,000 Speaker 1: actions that can be taken, you know. Um, so yeah, 277 00:16:22,120 --> 00:16:24,400 Speaker 1: but how are we on time? We're good on time. 278 00:16:24,400 --> 00:16:25,960 Speaker 1: We can go into a song break so we can 279 00:16:26,000 --> 00:16:29,640 Speaker 1: get into the nude edition of fem Defense. This is 280 00:16:29,640 --> 00:16:31,720 Speaker 1: actually going to turn out to be like a cross 281 00:16:31,800 --> 00:16:35,400 Speaker 1: between fem defense and fem tech. You're right, we do 282 00:16:35,520 --> 00:16:37,720 Speaker 1: this a lot. Do we talk about fem tech and 283 00:16:37,760 --> 00:16:39,920 Speaker 1: then end up bringing fem defense Because you have to 284 00:16:39,960 --> 00:16:42,240 Speaker 1: stay safe on the internet. On the Internet, but as 285 00:16:42,600 --> 00:16:46,720 Speaker 1: you know, women or fem's women and fem's um, you're 286 00:16:46,760 --> 00:16:48,280 Speaker 1: on the you can be on the internet a lot. 287 00:16:48,400 --> 00:16:50,720 Speaker 1: So really it is a bridge. It is how do 288 00:16:50,760 --> 00:16:54,640 Speaker 1: you stay safe? Right, absolutely using the internet to keep 289 00:16:54,640 --> 00:16:58,200 Speaker 1: you safe and staying safe on the internet. Lord, all right, 290 00:16:58,280 --> 00:16:59,760 Speaker 1: So we're gonna leave you or not leave you, but 291 00:16:59,800 --> 00:17:04,760 Speaker 1: we're gonna take a little break. Pod castera belly rast 292 00:17:06,160 --> 00:17:12,120 Speaker 1: and and and and and and and and and and 293 00:17:12,119 --> 00:17:18,200 Speaker 1: and and and and and and and and and and 294 00:17:18,280 --> 00:17:26,680 Speaker 1: and and belly rang and and and send them rack 295 00:17:26,760 --> 00:17:33,719 Speaker 1: and and and and ra and and and and um 296 00:17:34,160 --> 00:17:46,000 Speaker 1: from from from from from from of it and ship. 297 00:17:47,640 --> 00:17:50,640 Speaker 1: So let's get into it. Yes, our tips and trips. Yes, 298 00:17:51,040 --> 00:17:54,040 Speaker 1: so you know nuds we send them, we received it, 299 00:17:54,160 --> 00:17:58,040 Speaker 1: We send them. We do send news and we send nuds. 300 00:17:58,119 --> 00:18:00,399 Speaker 1: We send neuds to each other. We a nudes to 301 00:18:00,440 --> 00:18:03,080 Speaker 1: each other for a while, like the Mommy Collective, Like 302 00:18:03,240 --> 00:18:05,119 Speaker 1: we would like send our nuds to each other and 303 00:18:05,200 --> 00:18:08,440 Speaker 1: then hashtag it. Don't don't make my news. I love it. 304 00:18:08,880 --> 00:18:11,119 Speaker 1: You know what. Sometimes I will take a photo of 305 00:18:11,200 --> 00:18:14,600 Speaker 1: myself naked and I'm like, it's just for me. I'm 306 00:18:14,600 --> 00:18:16,560 Speaker 1: not sending it to anyone, and there are times where 307 00:18:16,600 --> 00:18:18,000 Speaker 1: I want to send it to my friends, like my 308 00:18:18,119 --> 00:18:21,639 Speaker 1: lady friends, my women friends, like so they can praise 309 00:18:21,720 --> 00:18:25,080 Speaker 1: me and they can some gods worship in that moment. 310 00:18:25,600 --> 00:18:28,399 Speaker 1: That's literally what it is. It's exactly goddess worship and 311 00:18:28,480 --> 00:18:31,800 Speaker 1: just affirmation, bodily affirmation. And that has definitely we have 312 00:18:31,920 --> 00:18:34,400 Speaker 1: done that in the Mommy collective, in our group chat 313 00:18:34,480 --> 00:18:37,719 Speaker 1: where we send nudes and and even just generally photos 314 00:18:37,760 --> 00:18:40,240 Speaker 1: of like a cute outfit. Yeah, like oh look at 315 00:18:40,320 --> 00:18:42,240 Speaker 1: my literally just this is what I'm wearing today. I 316 00:18:42,520 --> 00:18:46,480 Speaker 1: just want to let you all know. You know, yes, yes, 317 00:18:46,680 --> 00:18:52,200 Speaker 1: the true right, we're like reading the alarm my clothes. Yeah, 318 00:18:52,320 --> 00:18:57,119 Speaker 1: So who deserves to see your nude? Nobody? And I 319 00:18:57,200 --> 00:18:59,360 Speaker 1: think that's one reason why we send them to each other. 320 00:19:00,160 --> 00:19:04,960 Speaker 1: I literally like right now, like I don't trust them, 321 00:19:05,320 --> 00:19:08,520 Speaker 1: the men, you know, I don't try. And that's part 322 00:19:08,600 --> 00:19:10,639 Speaker 1: of like what makes all of this so upsetting is 323 00:19:10,680 --> 00:19:13,399 Speaker 1: like sending nudes is fun. It's wholesome in a lot 324 00:19:13,480 --> 00:19:16,360 Speaker 1: of ways. It's just your natural state, your naked body, 325 00:19:16,480 --> 00:19:19,600 Speaker 1: you know, that's all. But it becomes so demonized and 326 00:19:19,680 --> 00:19:22,359 Speaker 1: so complicated, and it can be turned on you. So 327 00:19:22,560 --> 00:19:24,560 Speaker 1: for me. My answer is, no, one deserves you, but 328 00:19:24,680 --> 00:19:28,879 Speaker 1: he deserves to except the ladies of the Mammies Collective. No, 329 00:19:29,040 --> 00:19:31,760 Speaker 1: I mean, there are definitely guys who are grown ups. 330 00:19:31,960 --> 00:19:34,040 Speaker 1: There are people who are grown ups. But I think 331 00:19:34,080 --> 00:19:38,000 Speaker 1: that the revenge porn thing tends to be predominantly men 332 00:19:38,200 --> 00:19:42,000 Speaker 1: leaking women's ship. I just think that's the predominant. Like, 333 00:19:42,840 --> 00:19:44,480 Speaker 1: and in all of this, I've seen in all of 334 00:19:44,520 --> 00:19:46,480 Speaker 1: this throughout Kardashian and this isn't the first time that 335 00:19:46,520 --> 00:19:51,360 Speaker 1: a woman's celebrities, right, but I think happens all the time. 336 00:19:51,480 --> 00:19:54,720 Speaker 1: They don't look, I don't think thinking that this was 337 00:19:54,800 --> 00:19:56,680 Speaker 1: the Okay, I can't say that this is I'm making 338 00:19:56,720 --> 00:19:59,960 Speaker 1: a huge generalization and it could be wrong, but I'm 339 00:20:00,160 --> 00:20:02,200 Speaker 1: I want to say that this is the first time 340 00:20:02,240 --> 00:20:05,600 Speaker 1: that it was just on Instagram, like that was his media, 341 00:20:06,119 --> 00:20:08,040 Speaker 1: not like, oh, it was leaked on the internet and 342 00:20:08,160 --> 00:20:10,840 Speaker 1: on some website, because that has happened with women with 343 00:20:11,000 --> 00:20:14,800 Speaker 1: actresses somewhere, right, But this was he was purposely leaking 344 00:20:14,880 --> 00:20:18,879 Speaker 1: it on Instagram as revenge, writing caption saying she was 345 00:20:18,960 --> 00:20:21,600 Speaker 1: cheating on me. This this what you know? Whatever? The 346 00:20:21,680 --> 00:20:24,359 Speaker 1: others is usually just just the video or just the photo. 347 00:20:25,320 --> 00:20:29,440 Speaker 1: But this was like very deliberate, intentional, you know, and 348 00:20:29,600 --> 00:20:33,240 Speaker 1: that's why showing her he was shaming her for having 349 00:20:33,280 --> 00:20:36,200 Speaker 1: a good having a sex life exactly and for him 350 00:20:36,240 --> 00:20:39,360 Speaker 1: and during and maybe even after and after and which 351 00:20:39,359 --> 00:20:42,119 Speaker 1: you're describing like his actions the way you described it. 352 00:20:42,600 --> 00:20:47,360 Speaker 1: He definitely aligns with the Penal Code around the law 353 00:20:47,640 --> 00:20:50,760 Speaker 1: around revenge porn, Like it just hits all the marks, 354 00:20:50,840 --> 00:20:53,080 Speaker 1: and we actually have it here pulled up, so it's 355 00:20:53,119 --> 00:20:56,600 Speaker 1: like there's no denying that this is literally just by 356 00:20:56,640 --> 00:20:59,760 Speaker 1: the book definition of revenge porn what she did. There's 357 00:20:59,800 --> 00:21:03,080 Speaker 1: really no gray area. Right. So this is in Penal 358 00:21:03,160 --> 00:21:07,600 Speaker 1: Code section sixty seven UM in California. Right, So each 359 00:21:07,640 --> 00:21:09,320 Speaker 1: state is going to have their own different laws. I 360 00:21:09,359 --> 00:21:12,120 Speaker 1: don't know if every state has a revenge porn law, 361 00:21:12,160 --> 00:21:15,040 Speaker 1: but California doesn't want to say, like thirty seven states do. 362 00:21:15,800 --> 00:21:18,720 Speaker 1: It could be wrong, but I know that it's there's 363 00:21:19,080 --> 00:21:21,200 Speaker 1: quite a few. There's quite a few. Yeah. So this 364 00:21:21,359 --> 00:21:24,920 Speaker 1: is the California one Penal Code section seven. It is 365 00:21:26,080 --> 00:21:28,480 Speaker 1: it is now a crime to distribute private pictures of 366 00:21:28,560 --> 00:21:32,639 Speaker 1: a person's intimate parts if such distribution is intended to 367 00:21:32,720 --> 00:21:35,719 Speaker 1: cause serious emotional distress. And does. So it is now 368 00:21:35,800 --> 00:21:39,600 Speaker 1: a misdemeanor to distribute so called revenge porn. I mean, 369 00:21:39,880 --> 00:21:44,159 Speaker 1: that's what he did. That's what he did, and um, 370 00:21:44,280 --> 00:21:46,639 Speaker 1: it's not cool. Don't do it. There's no excuse for it, 371 00:21:47,280 --> 00:21:50,119 Speaker 1: you know. And if there are men out there who 372 00:21:50,119 --> 00:21:52,719 Speaker 1: are frustrated or feel like like, you know, I never 373 00:21:52,840 --> 00:21:54,879 Speaker 1: get photos or women don't want to send me photos, 374 00:21:54,960 --> 00:21:57,920 Speaker 1: well you know why. This is why you can blame 375 00:21:57,960 --> 00:22:02,040 Speaker 1: your homies. I always hope, and I'm positive what does 376 00:22:02,119 --> 00:22:05,040 Speaker 1: not happen, but I always hope that after a breakup 377 00:22:05,320 --> 00:22:08,040 Speaker 1: that people delete the news. Oh my god, I have 378 00:22:08,400 --> 00:22:11,480 Speaker 1: I have. I have like sat people down like x's 379 00:22:11,520 --> 00:22:14,359 Speaker 1: and stuff and said like everything needs to be deleted 380 00:22:14,359 --> 00:22:16,600 Speaker 1: and I need you to go into your cloud. And 381 00:22:16,720 --> 00:22:19,520 Speaker 1: I think those experiences have also taught me that, like, 382 00:22:20,040 --> 00:22:22,520 Speaker 1: you know, if you want nudes to happen, they can happen. 383 00:22:22,920 --> 00:22:25,520 Speaker 1: There are really there are tips and there are ways 384 00:22:25,560 --> 00:22:27,879 Speaker 1: to keep yourself safe. So let's get into some of 385 00:22:27,960 --> 00:22:31,159 Speaker 1: the tips. Yeah, so for so, that's one of them. Right. Um, 386 00:22:31,600 --> 00:22:35,840 Speaker 1: you have the right to ask somebody to delete photos 387 00:22:35,920 --> 00:22:38,480 Speaker 1: off of their phone of you, you know, you make 388 00:22:38,560 --> 00:22:42,479 Speaker 1: the request, use your voice, you know, advocate for yourself. Um, 389 00:22:42,600 --> 00:22:46,920 Speaker 1: try it if you're uncomfortable. It's better to just do 390 00:22:47,080 --> 00:22:49,399 Speaker 1: it than to not, and you know, and just to 391 00:22:49,480 --> 00:22:54,400 Speaker 1: stay silent. The other tip that I would recommend also, 392 00:22:54,520 --> 00:22:58,119 Speaker 1: it's like you listen, you can do nudes however you 393 00:22:58,320 --> 00:23:00,800 Speaker 1: want to do them. If you're the sender, if it's 394 00:23:00,880 --> 00:23:04,159 Speaker 1: your body being exposed, then you make up all the rules. 395 00:23:04,680 --> 00:23:07,520 Speaker 1: You know, it's on your that's your territory, that's your body, 396 00:23:08,160 --> 00:23:12,120 Speaker 1: so they're really should the person who's receiving the photos 397 00:23:12,280 --> 00:23:15,679 Speaker 1: really shouldn't have any say or negotiations. It's your way 398 00:23:15,760 --> 00:23:17,639 Speaker 1: or the highway if you're the one who it's a 399 00:23:17,680 --> 00:23:20,560 Speaker 1: picture of your body. Right, So that means that you 400 00:23:20,720 --> 00:23:22,600 Speaker 1: can sure like nutes can happen, or you can take 401 00:23:22,680 --> 00:23:25,719 Speaker 1: videos of you know, sex or whatever. But maybe your 402 00:23:25,800 --> 00:23:28,159 Speaker 1: rule is it's only on your phone. It lives on 403 00:23:28,280 --> 00:23:30,359 Speaker 1: your phone and that's it. You guys can look at 404 00:23:30,400 --> 00:23:32,879 Speaker 1: them together, watch them together, whatever it is. Some people 405 00:23:32,960 --> 00:23:36,520 Speaker 1: do that and that's completely up to you. Yeah. One 406 00:23:36,560 --> 00:23:38,639 Speaker 1: thing that I was telling Melon that I thought it 407 00:23:38,720 --> 00:23:41,960 Speaker 1: was kind of funny that I remember Adrian Bylon did 408 00:23:42,040 --> 00:23:44,200 Speaker 1: like a little mini segment on the Talk. Right. This 409 00:23:44,520 --> 00:23:48,280 Speaker 1: would also robbed Kardashian's ex girlfriend. Oh yeah, this is 410 00:23:48,359 --> 00:23:52,000 Speaker 1: so true. My god. Right. She also, in no shade 411 00:23:52,040 --> 00:23:54,879 Speaker 1: at all, she had his name tattooed on her on 412 00:23:55,000 --> 00:23:57,719 Speaker 1: her butt. I did not know the name. She's very 413 00:23:57,800 --> 00:24:00,440 Speaker 1: open about it. So she's talked about it on the talk. 414 00:24:00,480 --> 00:24:01,920 Speaker 1: I think that's the name of the show, right, the real, 415 00:24:02,080 --> 00:24:04,840 Speaker 1: the real. So there's a talk though, I think, okay, 416 00:24:04,880 --> 00:24:09,160 Speaker 1: but we're talking about the real real, so the real. Um. Anyway, 417 00:24:09,240 --> 00:24:12,840 Speaker 1: So she actually does share some some tips for sending nudes, 418 00:24:12,880 --> 00:24:14,280 Speaker 1: and one of them is, if you're going to send 419 00:24:14,520 --> 00:24:17,600 Speaker 1: let's say, a picture of your breast or your booty 420 00:24:17,720 --> 00:24:20,880 Speaker 1: or whatever, you know, some type of some type of picture, UM, 421 00:24:21,680 --> 00:24:25,959 Speaker 1: do so so that nothing is recognizable in the photo. 422 00:24:26,080 --> 00:24:28,199 Speaker 1: For instance, do not wear your nameplate if you're going 423 00:24:28,280 --> 00:24:30,560 Speaker 1: to send a photo, you know, if you have maybe 424 00:24:30,760 --> 00:24:33,320 Speaker 1: for this specifically for me, like if I'm going to 425 00:24:33,400 --> 00:24:35,680 Speaker 1: send one, UM, make sure not to get any of 426 00:24:35,760 --> 00:24:38,680 Speaker 1: my tattoos or something that can you can see it 427 00:24:38,720 --> 00:24:42,800 Speaker 1: and be like, oh, yeah, that's that's that's her r um. Yeah. 428 00:24:42,880 --> 00:24:44,680 Speaker 1: So those I think, and I think that that's a 429 00:24:44,760 --> 00:24:47,359 Speaker 1: really those are that's a good one. You're going to 430 00:24:47,440 --> 00:24:51,040 Speaker 1: send a cleavage shot like that could be anybody's cleaving, 431 00:24:51,240 --> 00:24:54,440 Speaker 1: anyone you know, like who would know? Yeah, that is 432 00:24:54,480 --> 00:24:56,640 Speaker 1: a good one. That's a good one, especially to test 433 00:24:56,720 --> 00:24:59,280 Speaker 1: the waters even just to begin with. And that's the 434 00:24:59,359 --> 00:25:02,280 Speaker 1: thing you can and when it comes to nudes, if 435 00:25:02,359 --> 00:25:04,879 Speaker 1: someone wants nudes or you want to send someone nudes, 436 00:25:04,960 --> 00:25:06,879 Speaker 1: you can test the waters a little bit. It doesn't 437 00:25:06,920 --> 00:25:09,240 Speaker 1: have to be full nude the first one that you say, 438 00:25:10,080 --> 00:25:11,960 Speaker 1: so like, here's something that you could do, right, And 439 00:25:12,040 --> 00:25:14,240 Speaker 1: it takes oh my god, this takes how much planning 440 00:25:14,720 --> 00:25:18,439 Speaker 1: just wanting to engage in this practice really, actually, now 441 00:25:18,520 --> 00:25:20,239 Speaker 1: that I think about it, it does take a lot 442 00:25:20,280 --> 00:25:22,800 Speaker 1: of running. You have to anticipate, in plan and prepare. 443 00:25:23,520 --> 00:25:26,399 Speaker 1: So like snapchat, right your snaps disappeared. Maybe what you 444 00:25:26,440 --> 00:25:28,120 Speaker 1: want to do is if you want to send nudes 445 00:25:28,160 --> 00:25:30,360 Speaker 1: to somebody, you start off with snaps, and you start 446 00:25:30,400 --> 00:25:33,120 Speaker 1: off with like a more conservative snap to just test 447 00:25:33,200 --> 00:25:36,159 Speaker 1: the waters, right, and you can tell if they're screenshotting it. 448 00:25:36,240 --> 00:25:39,240 Speaker 1: If that person is screenshotting it without asking permission, then 449 00:25:39,320 --> 00:25:41,040 Speaker 1: now you know whether or not you want to send 450 00:25:41,119 --> 00:25:43,800 Speaker 1: more or not send more, revealing or just stop. That 451 00:25:43,960 --> 00:25:45,960 Speaker 1: is a really good way to test the waters for sure. 452 00:25:46,480 --> 00:25:48,399 Speaker 1: You know what, Snapchat does have a feature now that 453 00:25:48,440 --> 00:25:51,520 Speaker 1: where you can save photos, like you hold it down 454 00:25:51,600 --> 00:25:53,680 Speaker 1: and it saves it, and it saves it on the 455 00:25:53,880 --> 00:25:56,480 Speaker 1: on the thread. Because that makes all I see okay, 456 00:25:56,720 --> 00:26:00,640 Speaker 1: and the sender obviously knows is notified because I don't Drew, 457 00:26:01,680 --> 00:26:04,600 Speaker 1: and I'm that's your how Snapchat works entirely. I don't 458 00:26:04,680 --> 00:26:07,560 Speaker 1: use Snapchat anymore, but I'm just saying you could. Yeah, 459 00:26:07,760 --> 00:26:09,960 Speaker 1: but the same, like it is a good way to 460 00:26:10,080 --> 00:26:13,480 Speaker 1: test the waters and see, yeah, just in case you know, 461 00:26:14,320 --> 00:26:19,840 Speaker 1: um yeah, what else? What else? Like the other thing 462 00:26:19,960 --> 00:26:21,520 Speaker 1: is if you want to send nudes, like we were 463 00:26:21,560 --> 00:26:23,520 Speaker 1: talking about, it doesn't always have to be like for 464 00:26:23,640 --> 00:26:27,200 Speaker 1: sexual gratification of another person. Like, if you want to 465 00:26:27,240 --> 00:26:29,120 Speaker 1: send nudes, send nudes and you can kind of get 466 00:26:29,160 --> 00:26:32,800 Speaker 1: the same satisfaction if you send them to your friend. Honestly, 467 00:26:32,960 --> 00:26:35,480 Speaker 1: I have sent satisfying Yeah. I have spent booty pictures 468 00:26:35,560 --> 00:26:39,360 Speaker 1: to probably all of my very very close friends. Look 469 00:26:39,359 --> 00:26:41,520 Speaker 1: at how good my ask looks today. Look at mind 470 00:26:41,560 --> 00:26:44,280 Speaker 1: you underwear so cute. One time I went to Big 471 00:26:44,359 --> 00:26:49,040 Speaker 1: Bear and I like, I remember this photo. Actually I 472 00:26:49,160 --> 00:26:52,359 Speaker 1: went to Big Bear with with the guy that I was, 473 00:26:52,600 --> 00:26:55,240 Speaker 1: you know, dating at the time. We would take a 474 00:26:55,280 --> 00:26:56,560 Speaker 1: lot of trips all the time. So we went to 475 00:26:56,640 --> 00:26:58,639 Speaker 1: Big Bear and we got like a little cabin and 476 00:26:59,080 --> 00:27:03,159 Speaker 1: I took a nude photo on a polaroid with like 477 00:27:03,600 --> 00:27:06,679 Speaker 1: next to the fireplace, like with my big furry boots. 478 00:27:06,800 --> 00:27:08,720 Speaker 1: But then I was like, nude except for my boots. 479 00:27:09,200 --> 00:27:12,040 Speaker 1: And then I sent a picture of that picture to 480 00:27:12,200 --> 00:27:15,680 Speaker 1: the mommy's and they were like, oh, hello, Zovie. Yeah, 481 00:27:15,760 --> 00:27:19,240 Speaker 1: we were like scottest, Yes, it was so fun. And 482 00:27:19,280 --> 00:27:21,159 Speaker 1: then the guy that I was with, he's the one 483 00:27:21,200 --> 00:27:22,679 Speaker 1: who took the picture. And then I was like, oh 484 00:27:22,760 --> 00:27:24,040 Speaker 1: my god, I'm going to send this to all of 485 00:27:24,119 --> 00:27:28,160 Speaker 1: my friends. That's hilarious. And he was like, why that's 486 00:27:28,200 --> 00:27:31,520 Speaker 1: funny because it's from culture. This is I sent the 487 00:27:31,600 --> 00:27:33,919 Speaker 1: same a picture I was wearing like a little um, 488 00:27:34,520 --> 00:27:36,600 Speaker 1: I was wearing lingerie, and I sent it to the 489 00:27:36,640 --> 00:27:39,119 Speaker 1: mommy's as well, and I just and I took it. 490 00:27:39,359 --> 00:27:41,280 Speaker 1: I literally took it just to send it to them, 491 00:27:41,720 --> 00:27:43,720 Speaker 1: because this is after Mama had sent our pictures. So 492 00:27:43,840 --> 00:27:45,960 Speaker 1: we started, I mean her pictures, so we um we 493 00:27:46,080 --> 00:27:48,040 Speaker 1: started like a little thing that I think within that 494 00:27:48,160 --> 00:27:51,280 Speaker 1: week or two, we were sending each other some photos. Yeah, 495 00:27:51,320 --> 00:27:56,200 Speaker 1: and it was all hashtag don't think my dude, so yeah, 496 00:27:56,359 --> 00:27:59,040 Speaker 1: so fun, so fun, And there are things that you 497 00:27:59,160 --> 00:28:02,119 Speaker 1: can do. Lie when I get crisis calls, a lot 498 00:28:02,200 --> 00:28:04,040 Speaker 1: of girls just don't know what to do, right when 499 00:28:04,040 --> 00:28:06,760 Speaker 1: they're being threatened with their nudes, they're going to leak 500 00:28:06,800 --> 00:28:10,239 Speaker 1: their nudes. It's basically the nudes are being weaponized against you, Right, 501 00:28:10,400 --> 00:28:11,840 Speaker 1: what can you do in a lot of people don't 502 00:28:11,880 --> 00:28:13,560 Speaker 1: know what the options are because they don't know it's 503 00:28:13,920 --> 00:28:19,920 Speaker 1: it's illegal. So first and foremost, um, you can file 504 00:28:20,000 --> 00:28:24,360 Speaker 1: of police reports. That is not always an option for everybody. 505 00:28:24,560 --> 00:28:27,720 Speaker 1: I don't like push people to go to the police 506 00:28:27,840 --> 00:28:31,119 Speaker 1: or to file reports, but just saying that it is 507 00:28:31,200 --> 00:28:35,159 Speaker 1: an option that exists in the world, should you feel 508 00:28:35,320 --> 00:28:38,240 Speaker 1: that that's the recourse you want to take, right, So, 509 00:28:38,400 --> 00:28:41,040 Speaker 1: like Black China probably had to file a police report 510 00:28:41,600 --> 00:28:44,320 Speaker 1: about about this whole situation, so I walk into Because 511 00:28:44,360 --> 00:28:46,840 Speaker 1: it's on the internet, things get complicated because that there's 512 00:28:46,880 --> 00:28:50,560 Speaker 1: no really territory there. It's in the ether. Yeah, So 513 00:28:50,840 --> 00:28:55,040 Speaker 1: but you go to your local police station, and because 514 00:28:55,120 --> 00:28:58,360 Speaker 1: it's not occurring in a physical specific location, just go 515 00:28:58,440 --> 00:29:01,280 Speaker 1: to your local police station. Tell the what's happening, file report, 516 00:29:01,640 --> 00:29:03,800 Speaker 1: show them any evidence that you might have. You take 517 00:29:04,120 --> 00:29:06,960 Speaker 1: if he's leaking things, say that document if he leaks things, 518 00:29:07,040 --> 00:29:09,680 Speaker 1: or this this person that you're engaging with, whoever they are, 519 00:29:09,840 --> 00:29:11,880 Speaker 1: if they leak things, take screenshots of all of it. 520 00:29:12,040 --> 00:29:14,680 Speaker 1: Document all of it. Can you can even confront that 521 00:29:14,800 --> 00:29:17,800 Speaker 1: person and say stop this, don't do this, Like I'm 522 00:29:17,840 --> 00:29:21,720 Speaker 1: filing a report, take screenshots of all those communications. Because 523 00:29:21,760 --> 00:29:23,480 Speaker 1: when you walk into a police station, like and you 524 00:29:23,520 --> 00:29:25,920 Speaker 1: try and file a crime report, police actually do very 525 00:29:25,960 --> 00:29:29,400 Speaker 1: minimal investigations into things like this. You have to take 526 00:29:29,480 --> 00:29:32,960 Speaker 1: them the evidence. Basically, they're they're not they're not getting 527 00:29:33,000 --> 00:29:36,200 Speaker 1: search warrants and subpoenas to get his phone and check 528 00:29:36,280 --> 00:29:38,840 Speaker 1: his phone. That's not happening, right. You have to be 529 00:29:39,000 --> 00:29:42,760 Speaker 1: proactive and show them document what's been going on. Um, 530 00:29:42,960 --> 00:29:45,880 Speaker 1: So there's that. You can also, you know, contact let 531 00:29:45,920 --> 00:29:48,760 Speaker 1: me actually give you guys the number for a crisis 532 00:29:48,840 --> 00:29:51,640 Speaker 1: hotline if something happens and you do want to talk 533 00:29:51,680 --> 00:29:55,840 Speaker 1: to a crisis counselor. Um, that's always a good option 534 00:29:56,200 --> 00:30:02,320 Speaker 1: based on your particular situation, right, Um, you know, thinking 535 00:30:02,400 --> 00:30:05,440 Speaker 1: about it, it's also like, not only are the nudes 536 00:30:05,560 --> 00:30:07,960 Speaker 1: or the photos or whatever this may be. Like, not 537 00:30:08,080 --> 00:30:11,760 Speaker 1: only is it weaponized, but you're also dehumanized in the process, right, 538 00:30:11,800 --> 00:30:14,360 Speaker 1: and that's why you feel so violated or you feel 539 00:30:15,360 --> 00:30:18,400 Speaker 1: you know, your your trust was completely broken and now 540 00:30:18,480 --> 00:30:21,000 Speaker 1: you're just you're you're reduced to an object. There's no 541 00:30:21,120 --> 00:30:26,640 Speaker 1: humanity in it anymore, no none. Um And and people 542 00:30:27,040 --> 00:30:31,240 Speaker 1: jump on the leaking of nudes and women's nude bodies 543 00:30:31,360 --> 00:30:35,480 Speaker 1: when women's new bodies are exposed somehow, whether it's by 544 00:30:35,600 --> 00:30:39,720 Speaker 1: our choice or it's because violation of our consent, anytime 545 00:30:39,760 --> 00:30:43,800 Speaker 1: that our bodies are exposed, people, especially men, especially since 546 00:30:43,880 --> 00:30:47,200 Speaker 1: hetero straight men, use that as an opportunity to dehumanize 547 00:30:47,280 --> 00:30:49,920 Speaker 1: us and to do violence to us. There's a reason 548 00:30:50,000 --> 00:30:53,440 Speaker 1: why all nude strip clubs there's they're not allowed to 549 00:30:53,440 --> 00:30:56,360 Speaker 1: have alcohol in there, right, because then people can't control 550 00:30:56,440 --> 00:30:59,719 Speaker 1: themselves or choose not to write and go crazy when 551 00:30:59,720 --> 00:31:04,640 Speaker 1: women our nude. Um and it's not cool. Yeah, like 552 00:31:05,320 --> 00:31:08,960 Speaker 1: like it's just too much, you know. Um. I think 553 00:31:09,040 --> 00:31:11,480 Speaker 1: that that's one of the reasons why the artists that 554 00:31:11,520 --> 00:31:15,320 Speaker 1: I really love Monica Kim Garza, she paints nudes of 555 00:31:15,400 --> 00:31:19,440 Speaker 1: women of color. I love Monica Kangarza. Yeah, check her out, 556 00:31:19,560 --> 00:31:21,680 Speaker 1: you guys. I wrote an article about her about a 557 00:31:21,760 --> 00:31:25,720 Speaker 1: year about a year ago for a vibe magazine Vibe 558 00:31:25,840 --> 00:31:29,160 Speaker 1: Viva Online, and the title of it is called Nalagas 559 00:31:29,200 --> 00:31:32,080 Speaker 1: and kim Chi the Art of Monica kim Garza because 560 00:31:32,120 --> 00:31:35,600 Speaker 1: she's have Korean, haf Mexican and she paints these beautiful 561 00:31:35,640 --> 00:31:38,760 Speaker 1: images of women of color, just like eating tacos, drinking 562 00:31:38,800 --> 00:31:43,360 Speaker 1: beer on the phone, the luxuriating, riding bikes, and it's 563 00:31:43,400 --> 00:31:46,400 Speaker 1: like a world free from that type of violence, Like 564 00:31:46,520 --> 00:31:49,080 Speaker 1: those women in her paintings can just exist in their 565 00:31:49,160 --> 00:31:53,040 Speaker 1: skin and be happy and enjoy their own bodies and 566 00:31:53,160 --> 00:31:56,840 Speaker 1: not face violence the way that we do in real life. Yeah, exactly, 567 00:31:57,120 --> 00:31:59,880 Speaker 1: that's a that's a feen escape as well. That's a famscape, 568 00:32:00,600 --> 00:32:02,800 Speaker 1: that type of that type of vision. Oh my god, 569 00:32:02,880 --> 00:32:05,560 Speaker 1: we should do an episode about our favorite like art 570 00:32:05,920 --> 00:32:08,280 Speaker 1: artists and like the femscapes that they create. It's a 571 00:32:08,320 --> 00:32:13,240 Speaker 1: good idea. Let's love it. Let's say that we'll table inside. 572 00:32:13,280 --> 00:32:15,720 Speaker 1: You guys are like, this is like behind the scene, 573 00:32:17,520 --> 00:32:19,400 Speaker 1: on the scenes at the same time, but at the 574 00:32:19,480 --> 00:32:23,720 Speaker 1: same time exactly exactly. Um yeah, I'm just pulling up 575 00:32:25,240 --> 00:32:27,440 Speaker 1: these hotline numbers that you guys can call if you 576 00:32:27,520 --> 00:32:30,080 Speaker 1: need to. So if you're in l A somewhere and 577 00:32:30,240 --> 00:32:32,440 Speaker 1: you need to speak to a crisis counselor you can 578 00:32:32,600 --> 00:32:36,160 Speaker 1: call the l A Rape and Battery Hotline, and um, 579 00:32:36,520 --> 00:32:38,920 Speaker 1: there's also a national domestic violence hotline. But I'll just 580 00:32:38,960 --> 00:32:41,400 Speaker 1: give you this crisis line. So the number is two 581 00:32:41,480 --> 00:32:47,600 Speaker 1: and three six two six three, and that's a resource. 582 00:32:47,800 --> 00:32:52,920 Speaker 1: Thank you for sharing. That's very important. M hm. There 583 00:32:53,000 --> 00:32:56,000 Speaker 1: was something I wanted to say, and I love um 584 00:32:57,520 --> 00:33:00,760 Speaker 1: all right, all right, have anything else? We have gotten 585 00:33:00,800 --> 00:33:03,920 Speaker 1: through a lot of material today. There was I mean, 586 00:33:03,960 --> 00:33:06,680 Speaker 1: there's always so much to talk about with these things. Um, 587 00:33:07,520 --> 00:33:10,720 Speaker 1: be safe, everybody be safe on the internet. Yeah, and 588 00:33:10,880 --> 00:33:13,560 Speaker 1: you know, I also want to shout out anybody who's 589 00:33:13,600 --> 00:33:18,160 Speaker 1: ever been shamed for their nudes. That's what I wanted 590 00:33:18,160 --> 00:33:21,000 Speaker 1: to say. There's so much victim blaming someone when a 591 00:33:22,600 --> 00:33:26,240 Speaker 1: nude lead because it's like, well, she shouldn't have taken 592 00:33:26,280 --> 00:33:30,160 Speaker 1: it in the first place, why not, right, that's why 593 00:33:30,240 --> 00:33:32,680 Speaker 1: did she send it to anyone? Right? She knew what 594 00:33:32,800 --> 00:33:36,360 Speaker 1: to expect it. And it's crazy because it's like there 595 00:33:36,520 --> 00:33:43,040 Speaker 1: is nothing violent or mean, more dangerous really or harmful 596 00:33:43,120 --> 00:33:46,080 Speaker 1: to anybody of me taking a picture of my naked body. 597 00:33:46,600 --> 00:33:51,040 Speaker 1: I literally am hurting no one, So I don't understand. Yeah, 598 00:33:51,160 --> 00:33:54,840 Speaker 1: the victim blaming in the stigma, any excuse to violate, 599 00:33:55,400 --> 00:33:59,960 Speaker 1: always women. It's exhausting, so tiring, you guys, like, I'm tired, 600 00:34:00,320 --> 00:34:05,160 Speaker 1: Let us live, let us breathe, right, Jesus, I'm dire. 601 00:34:05,320 --> 00:34:08,440 Speaker 1: It's like micro managing on a mass scale. No, don't 602 00:34:08,480 --> 00:34:10,759 Speaker 1: take pictures of yourself. No, don't send pictures. No, don't 603 00:34:10,760 --> 00:34:12,759 Speaker 1: do this, don't do that, don't wear this, don't God, 604 00:34:12,840 --> 00:34:18,320 Speaker 1: damna Jesus, control freaks. Patriarchy is a control freak. Really 605 00:34:18,400 --> 00:34:22,240 Speaker 1: a micro manager. Patriarchy is a micro manager. Make culture 606 00:34:22,719 --> 00:34:28,480 Speaker 1: is a micro manager. I am exhausted. It's hard being 607 00:34:28,520 --> 00:34:32,520 Speaker 1: a woman out here. It is sucking, exhausting, it really is. 608 00:34:32,760 --> 00:34:35,120 Speaker 1: But you know I wouldn't. There are days where I 609 00:34:35,160 --> 00:34:37,440 Speaker 1: wake up and I'm like, thank God, I'm not a 610 00:34:37,960 --> 00:34:42,280 Speaker 1: street man, Like, thank you Jesus. You know, I'm grateful 611 00:34:43,760 --> 00:34:46,880 Speaker 1: to be honestly be a woman. And you know what, 612 00:34:48,560 --> 00:34:50,279 Speaker 1: So if you're going to send a nude to send 613 00:34:50,320 --> 00:34:52,480 Speaker 1: it to your friends, send it to your close friends. 614 00:34:52,680 --> 00:34:55,239 Speaker 1: They deserve it. They do deserve it. They deserve they will, 615 00:34:55,360 --> 00:34:59,160 Speaker 1: they will worship, worship the photo and praise you in 616 00:34:59,239 --> 00:35:01,239 Speaker 1: a way that I think, I don't think you're a 617 00:35:01,360 --> 00:35:04,360 Speaker 1: potential partner or a man. Will but also your permission, 618 00:35:04,440 --> 00:35:06,879 Speaker 1: because you need You can't just oh well, the flip 619 00:35:07,000 --> 00:35:10,400 Speaker 1: side is unsolicited. Oh yeah, you have to ask because 620 00:35:10,440 --> 00:35:13,480 Speaker 1: what we what don't we like? Oh so here's the catch. 621 00:35:13,840 --> 00:35:16,560 Speaker 1: So we get stigmatized and we're not supposed to send nudes, 622 00:35:16,600 --> 00:35:20,480 Speaker 1: but we get listened in decades. Men send nudes all 623 00:35:20,560 --> 00:35:23,680 Speaker 1: the time, but they impose them on us. We don't 624 00:35:23,719 --> 00:35:26,080 Speaker 1: necessarily want them or ask for them, and yet there 625 00:35:26,120 --> 00:35:28,960 Speaker 1: they are. God damn it. Do you see? I don't 626 00:35:29,000 --> 00:35:31,920 Speaker 1: think I've actually ever received a dick pick? Oh lord, 627 00:35:33,160 --> 00:35:37,640 Speaker 1: I've received a few, but I have like only I 628 00:35:37,719 --> 00:35:39,960 Speaker 1: think it's been like at least via social media. It's 629 00:35:40,000 --> 00:35:42,719 Speaker 1: been very like a parent that I've only ever been 630 00:35:42,840 --> 00:35:45,720 Speaker 1: with women and dated women. Someone like a new realm 631 00:35:45,840 --> 00:35:48,640 Speaker 1: now that my sexuality is more open and I've identifies 632 00:35:48,680 --> 00:35:51,719 Speaker 1: more fluid interesting, But that is not an invitation to 633 00:35:51,840 --> 00:35:56,080 Speaker 1: send me to that. You need to have consents to 634 00:35:56,200 --> 00:35:59,279 Speaker 1: also send a photo to someone, because that's also in 635 00:35:59,400 --> 00:36:01,080 Speaker 1: a lot of way, it is a violation to just 636 00:36:01,200 --> 00:36:04,399 Speaker 1: send a naked image, an image of a naked body 637 00:36:04,520 --> 00:36:07,760 Speaker 1: or of genitalia to somebody without their knowledge or their consent, 638 00:36:08,120 --> 00:36:10,279 Speaker 1: or like letting them know ahead of time. I mean, 639 00:36:10,320 --> 00:36:12,680 Speaker 1: if you are, if you guys are already doing that 640 00:36:12,800 --> 00:36:15,680 Speaker 1: and you send random pictures to each other because you 641 00:36:15,760 --> 00:36:18,360 Speaker 1: have that understanding and that's something that you do, then cool. 642 00:36:19,040 --> 00:36:21,160 Speaker 1: But if it's like a first time thing, yeah, you 643 00:36:21,239 --> 00:36:22,719 Speaker 1: have to ask. You have to ask, And I send 644 00:36:22,760 --> 00:36:24,759 Speaker 1: you all this SPOTOI took. I really like it, by 645 00:36:24,800 --> 00:36:27,520 Speaker 1: the way I'm naked, by the way I'm comsolutely naked, 646 00:36:27,760 --> 00:36:29,359 Speaker 1: and I hope you like it, and then people will 647 00:36:29,400 --> 00:36:33,040 Speaker 1: be like, yes, of course, exactly exactly. That's a really 648 00:36:33,120 --> 00:36:36,880 Speaker 1: good point to make. Definitely always asked. Yeah, And so 649 00:36:37,080 --> 00:36:39,920 Speaker 1: I'm actually really happy that we started talking about the 650 00:36:40,000 --> 00:36:43,239 Speaker 1: unsolicited dick pics because otherwise, just like so many other 651 00:36:43,360 --> 00:36:46,520 Speaker 1: issues related to patriarchy and rape culture, it all becomes 652 00:36:46,560 --> 00:36:50,680 Speaker 1: focused on like how women experience it, and it becomes like, oh, 653 00:36:50,719 --> 00:36:53,759 Speaker 1: this is a women's issue, but men are participating in 654 00:36:53,920 --> 00:36:57,319 Speaker 1: some way. Men send nudes, but quite often they send 655 00:36:57,400 --> 00:37:01,680 Speaker 1: it in a way that is abusive and unsolicited. Yes, absolutely, 656 00:37:01,840 --> 00:37:04,200 Speaker 1: but they don't get the shame and the social stigma 657 00:37:04,360 --> 00:37:08,439 Speaker 1: for it. It's like funny to them, Oh my god, 658 00:37:08,960 --> 00:37:10,719 Speaker 1: like they can get away with whatever they want. They 659 00:37:10,760 --> 00:37:14,320 Speaker 1: really can, can they do because they spend. Because the 660 00:37:14,440 --> 00:37:17,279 Speaker 1: thing is, like, nobody wants to see an unsolicited dick. PI. 661 00:37:17,520 --> 00:37:19,880 Speaker 1: I mean, I don't think right, no, not me, not 662 00:37:20,760 --> 00:37:22,600 Speaker 1: if I want it, I'll let you know if you know, 663 00:37:22,719 --> 00:37:24,399 Speaker 1: if I want to see your dick. I'm just saying 664 00:37:25,520 --> 00:37:28,799 Speaker 1: it's true. It's absolutely true. And I don't know anyone. Yeah, 665 00:37:32,080 --> 00:37:33,960 Speaker 1: so that yeah, exactly. There's just no shame in it. 666 00:37:34,440 --> 00:37:37,480 Speaker 1: I'm just like, I'm just like, it's horrible, it's awful. 667 00:37:37,680 --> 00:37:41,439 Speaker 1: This is why everybody say no to men all the time, 668 00:37:41,520 --> 00:37:43,840 Speaker 1: say you know, to them, say no to them, you know, 669 00:37:44,440 --> 00:37:47,840 Speaker 1: curve them, deny them, stomp on their dreams, say no, 670 00:37:48,960 --> 00:37:51,480 Speaker 1: say no. And actually I have I am of the 671 00:37:51,560 --> 00:37:55,560 Speaker 1: firm belief I have always believed like men, straight men 672 00:37:55,719 --> 00:37:58,440 Speaker 1: should be grateful to women when we say no to 673 00:37:58,560 --> 00:38:00,680 Speaker 1: them and when we set boundaries and when we make 674 00:38:00,760 --> 00:38:05,239 Speaker 1: them see our choice and our humanity. You know, you 675 00:38:05,320 --> 00:38:06,960 Speaker 1: should be thanking me if you're a man and I 676 00:38:07,040 --> 00:38:08,839 Speaker 1: say no to you and I curve the ship out 677 00:38:08,880 --> 00:38:11,440 Speaker 1: of you. You should be grateful that I've given you 678 00:38:11,560 --> 00:38:14,160 Speaker 1: the opportunity to treat me like a human beings. Is 679 00:38:14,440 --> 00:38:17,480 Speaker 1: actually very true. You're learning something. You're learning how to 680 00:38:17,800 --> 00:38:20,600 Speaker 1: hear no from a woman and handle it like an adults, 681 00:38:21,360 --> 00:38:23,879 Speaker 1: you know, and not call you a bitch right after, 682 00:38:24,160 --> 00:38:26,600 Speaker 1: not call me an ugly fat bit right after, because 683 00:38:26,640 --> 00:38:30,080 Speaker 1: now you're salty. Exactly, say no to man. It's good 684 00:38:30,120 --> 00:38:32,200 Speaker 1: for them. They don't hear it enough. They need to 685 00:38:32,280 --> 00:38:34,880 Speaker 1: hear it more. And it'll feel good when you say it. 686 00:38:34,960 --> 00:38:36,880 Speaker 1: When you say no to a man, it feels fabulous. 687 00:38:37,800 --> 00:38:42,400 Speaker 1: It's refreshing. Yeah, yeah, I agree. Yeah, I feel like that. 688 00:38:42,520 --> 00:38:46,640 Speaker 1: I've been practicing that so much as of lately, just 689 00:38:46,800 --> 00:38:50,360 Speaker 1: like really respecting my boundaries. Um, there was somebody that 690 00:38:50,680 --> 00:38:52,360 Speaker 1: was trying to give me a hug and I was 691 00:38:52,440 --> 00:38:54,640 Speaker 1: like nope. I literally had to put my hands up 692 00:38:54,719 --> 00:38:57,920 Speaker 1: and I was like, uh, you're no, okay, right, And 693 00:38:58,000 --> 00:38:59,440 Speaker 1: they were like a hug as a friend and I 694 00:38:59,520 --> 00:39:02,520 Speaker 1: was like no, h And for me, like that's a 695 00:39:02,560 --> 00:39:05,040 Speaker 1: really big deal because in the past I would just 696 00:39:05,160 --> 00:39:07,320 Speaker 1: be like okay, and I would just like kind of 697 00:39:07,400 --> 00:39:10,040 Speaker 1: just have my hands down really uncomfortable. Obviously, I do 698 00:39:10,200 --> 00:39:12,439 Speaker 1: not want to be hugged or touched by this person 699 00:39:12,880 --> 00:39:15,000 Speaker 1: or just letting it be. So I think just the 700 00:39:15,040 --> 00:39:17,239 Speaker 1: fact that I can be like, no, this is my 701 00:39:17,360 --> 00:39:19,799 Speaker 1: space and my body. And because it takes a while, right, 702 00:39:19,840 --> 00:39:23,640 Speaker 1: because you're conditioned to always be complacent or say yes 703 00:39:23,840 --> 00:39:26,120 Speaker 1: or just go with it, go with it, and she'll 704 00:39:26,280 --> 00:39:30,880 Speaker 1: go with the flow. Absolutely, So I'm learning all of 705 00:39:30,960 --> 00:39:33,120 Speaker 1: it is. It takes some time, but it does feel 706 00:39:33,200 --> 00:39:35,759 Speaker 1: really good as to do it. Yeah, I felt great after. 707 00:39:35,840 --> 00:39:38,080 Speaker 1: I was like, good for you, Like, I'm so proud 708 00:39:38,160 --> 00:39:41,160 Speaker 1: of you. Me to me right, go self, I'm proud 709 00:39:41,200 --> 00:39:45,279 Speaker 1: of you. Yeah yeah yeah, so so yeah, if you 710 00:39:45,360 --> 00:39:47,800 Speaker 1: all have I'm sure there are more tips and tricks 711 00:39:47,840 --> 00:39:51,719 Speaker 1: when it comes you know, two nudes, sharing nudes, sending them, 712 00:39:51,800 --> 00:39:56,680 Speaker 1: receiving them, Um, you know, be ethical, the ethical, be kind, 713 00:39:57,160 --> 00:40:00,920 Speaker 1: be like, you know, a kind, healthy human being, and 714 00:40:01,040 --> 00:40:04,399 Speaker 1: treat others with respect. Because when someone sends you a nude, 715 00:40:04,520 --> 00:40:07,879 Speaker 1: that's that's trust in you. Yeah, really, that's a that's 716 00:40:08,000 --> 00:40:11,239 Speaker 1: vulnerability and it's really not cool to take advantage of 717 00:40:11,280 --> 00:40:15,400 Speaker 1: another person's vulnerability and trust. Don't post things on the 718 00:40:15,480 --> 00:40:19,120 Speaker 1: internet just just just like it like if you're not 719 00:40:19,239 --> 00:40:21,520 Speaker 1: the like if you don't own the photo exactly, or 720 00:40:21,600 --> 00:40:26,160 Speaker 1: just content in general information, do not post information, you know, 721 00:40:26,280 --> 00:40:30,040 Speaker 1: like someone else's inforyone else's against their will, without their consent. 722 00:40:31,280 --> 00:40:32,880 Speaker 1: It's all so much. It's just so it's just like 723 00:40:33,360 --> 00:40:37,920 Speaker 1: did in shame not accountability. Accountability is with one person, 724 00:40:38,560 --> 00:40:41,920 Speaker 1: one on one, and then maybe like if it's a community, 725 00:40:41,960 --> 00:40:43,879 Speaker 1: like it's if it's like rooted in like some type 726 00:40:43,880 --> 00:40:45,759 Speaker 1: of community, then maybe there's something you take it to 727 00:40:45,800 --> 00:40:47,480 Speaker 1: the next level, right, But I think it should always 728 00:40:47,480 --> 00:40:49,560 Speaker 1: start as like a one on one, not just like 729 00:40:49,680 --> 00:40:56,200 Speaker 1: this shameful call out post exactly exactly. So there's there's 730 00:40:56,239 --> 00:40:58,399 Speaker 1: so much, there's so much to talk about. I hope 731 00:40:58,440 --> 00:41:02,200 Speaker 1: this was helpful to people, because you know, everybody sends 732 00:41:02,280 --> 00:41:05,320 Speaker 1: nudes or they want to send nudes. They do, most people, 733 00:41:05,360 --> 00:41:07,680 Speaker 1: a lot of people people. So it's something that if 734 00:41:07,760 --> 00:41:10,120 Speaker 1: we engage in it, we should talk about it and 735 00:41:10,200 --> 00:41:13,960 Speaker 1: be safe, you know, I agree, Yeah, I mean communication 736 00:41:14,160 --> 00:41:17,759 Speaker 1: talking about it key. You can, like you set the 737 00:41:17,840 --> 00:41:21,120 Speaker 1: rules for your relationship, right, like you should be able to, 738 00:41:21,440 --> 00:41:23,279 Speaker 1: and it's it's hard to feel that way, but you 739 00:41:23,400 --> 00:41:27,719 Speaker 1: actually can. Yeah, Like you have rights. Yeah, you have autonomy, 740 00:41:27,760 --> 00:41:30,440 Speaker 1: you have agency to do what you want, and if 741 00:41:30,440 --> 00:41:33,360 Speaker 1: it's not working for you, it's not working exactly exactly 742 00:41:33,480 --> 00:41:37,239 Speaker 1: like listen, people, dating is not compulsory, it's not mandatory, 743 00:41:37,440 --> 00:41:40,960 Speaker 1: it's not forced, like it shouldn't be two people or 744 00:41:41,120 --> 00:41:44,120 Speaker 1: three people. However many we're talking about. People should date 745 00:41:44,400 --> 00:41:47,000 Speaker 1: because they want to. They date each other because they 746 00:41:47,080 --> 00:41:50,120 Speaker 1: want to, because it makes sense, because there's compatibility, not 747 00:41:50,239 --> 00:41:54,799 Speaker 1: because you feel coerced or forced or pressured guilted. Fuck 748 00:41:54,880 --> 00:42:00,040 Speaker 1: that ship of those those and it takes a I 749 00:42:00,120 --> 00:42:02,160 Speaker 1: want to figure out, like I actually don't have to 750 00:42:02,200 --> 00:42:05,520 Speaker 1: be here, No, you can, you can onto the next 751 00:42:05,600 --> 00:42:10,480 Speaker 1: actually be by yourself. You will be happier. This has 752 00:42:10,520 --> 00:42:12,759 Speaker 1: become like a whole new topic at this point. Why 753 00:42:12,760 --> 00:42:16,399 Speaker 1: don't even We're just like going on, we're a little 754 00:42:16,440 --> 00:42:18,799 Speaker 1: tired and we're a little bit exhausted. We had fun 755 00:42:18,920 --> 00:42:25,160 Speaker 1: last night, Yes, I had fun last night. I was 756 00:42:25,239 --> 00:42:27,920 Speaker 1: the designated driver last night. I went out to um 757 00:42:28,239 --> 00:42:30,080 Speaker 1: there's a South American party that happens in l A. 758 00:42:30,160 --> 00:42:32,160 Speaker 1: So I went out with my family last night. But 759 00:42:32,280 --> 00:42:35,120 Speaker 1: that is a different topic, that is entirely different topics. 760 00:42:35,520 --> 00:42:40,799 Speaker 1: We hope that you enjoyed. Um. I know I did 761 00:42:40,920 --> 00:42:43,759 Speaker 1: a fem defense. Don't link my nude, don't link my nude, 762 00:42:43,880 --> 00:42:46,719 Speaker 1: don't do it. Yeah, So stay safe out there. We'll 763 00:42:46,840 --> 00:42:49,919 Speaker 1: we'll be posting some stuff um to engage with y'all. 764 00:42:50,520 --> 00:42:53,520 Speaker 1: Engage with us. We love it, um. We love when 765 00:42:53,520 --> 00:42:57,560 Speaker 1: you tweet at us. We're on Twitter, Instagram, Facebook, local radio, 766 00:42:57,960 --> 00:43:01,000 Speaker 1: We're on SoundCloud, on SoundCloud, we are working on getting 767 00:43:01,040 --> 00:43:05,719 Speaker 1: back on iTunes. We are new to technology. Have any 768 00:43:05,800 --> 00:43:09,359 Speaker 1: tips let us know, so we're figuring it out. Thank 769 00:43:09,400 --> 00:43:12,520 Speaker 1: you so much. Also, I wanted to say somebody commented 770 00:43:12,520 --> 00:43:15,399 Speaker 1: on our Instagram about like, where are we going? Because 771 00:43:15,440 --> 00:43:19,279 Speaker 1: there's rumors that SoundCloud it will be nonexistent. So someone 772 00:43:19,400 --> 00:43:21,960 Speaker 1: was like, where will we listen? I think that its 773 00:43:21,960 --> 00:43:25,160 Speaker 1: SoundCloud is okay? Yeah, chance the rappers saved, right. I 774 00:43:25,200 --> 00:43:27,719 Speaker 1: think it's okay. Um, But we're also trying to get 775 00:43:27,719 --> 00:43:29,520 Speaker 1: another platforms right now, so we will let you all know. 776 00:43:30,040 --> 00:43:34,560 Speaker 1: We aren't going anywhere, thank god, because even the work 777 00:43:34,840 --> 00:43:38,800 Speaker 1: to try and figure all of that out exhausting. We're tired. 778 00:43:39,000 --> 00:43:41,840 Speaker 1: We're gonna go down and take a nap. Thank you 779 00:43:42,040 --> 00:43:46,320 Speaker 1: so much for listening. We love you. Another installment of 780 00:43:46,400 --> 00:43:49,200 Speaker 1: brown girl Our We love you all. Thanks for listening 781 00:43:50,400 --> 00:43:50,720 Speaker 1: those