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Speaker 1: Some things are worth bragging about. Some things aren't. It's

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Speaker 1: Brook and Jeffrey in the morning, like, for example, worth

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Speaker 1: bragging about.

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Speaker 2: Okay, when I was named mister Fallbrook.

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Speaker 1: Mall nineteen eighty nine as the cutest baby this side

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Speaker 1: of West Hollywood.

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Speaker 3: Oh yeah, I mean that's usually when people ask me, like,

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Speaker 3: what's jeff Like, that's the first thing I got that's

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Speaker 3: worth saying.

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Speaker 2: Thank you for mentioning it. Yeah, it's a hot baby.

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Speaker 1: Something not worth bragging about. When Brooke haggled at her

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Speaker 1: son's elementary school bake sale, telling a seven year old, no,

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Speaker 1: I won't pay seventy five cents for a half dozen brownies.

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Speaker 1: You'll give those to me for free, and then maybe

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Speaker 1: i'll sign your T shirt.

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Speaker 3: I kid learning if you ask me.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, they're proud of it.

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Speaker 1: The reason I bring it up, though, is because a

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Speaker 1: new list came out that asked people to share the

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Speaker 1: weirdest flexes that they've ever heard somebody else say with

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Speaker 1: a totally straight face, Yes, this is gonna be good,

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Speaker 1: so let's get into it. Number ten said. One of

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Speaker 1: my managers prided herself on being crazy busy. She proudly

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Speaker 1: told me she hasn't listened to any music in fifteen

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Speaker 1: years because she doesn't have the time.

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Speaker 2: It's impossible. How do you avoid music? What a stupid brag?

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Speaker 3: That miserable life to me?

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Speaker 2: I didn't use it to escape.

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Speaker 3: I feel like the only brag is how you get

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Speaker 3: more PTO time?

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Speaker 2: How do you utilize that?

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Speaker 1: Use it?

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Speaker 3: Yeah?

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Speaker 1: Number nine, a coworker boasted about never using their paid

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Speaker 1: time off.

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Speaker 2: Why there we are and the.

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Speaker 1: Days don't roll over, so they would keep track in

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Speaker 1: their cubicle with a big sign that said so far,

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Speaker 1: I've missed twenty nine vacation days.

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Speaker 4: That is not at all and not healthy.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, well, why do you think the company is still

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Speaker 1: afloat and able to give everybody else vacation because she

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Speaker 1: is sacrificing herself.

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Speaker 2: Let's give them a little bit of respect.

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Speaker 3: Someone brook slack like the kids that didn't miss school and.

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Speaker 2: Absences and skip a day?

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Speaker 1: Bro life you Harvard grad Number eight. My brother in

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Speaker 1: law is almost sixty. He always brags about never eating

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Speaker 1: fruits or vegetables. When I told him that technically pizza

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Speaker 1: sauce is made from tomatoes, he vowed to never eat

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Speaker 1: a pizza again.

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Speaker 3: Whoa he't thought can he just learned.

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Speaker 2: That nothing but vegetables my entire life.

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Speaker 3: See, he skipped too many days of health class. I

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Speaker 3: think he's the problem. There's a balance.

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Speaker 1: These are from a new list of the most bizarre

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Speaker 1: flexes people have ever said, genuinely thinking they're cool because

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Speaker 1: of it.

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Speaker 2: Number seven.

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Speaker 1: I had a boss who used to call my handwriting

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Speaker 1: ugly and chicken scratch. She claims she wanted award for

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Speaker 1: her handwriting back in third grade, which was probably around

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Speaker 1: sixty years ago.

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Speaker 3: I do feel like this is something you would brag about, Jeff,

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Speaker 3: you do have good penman, chef. I feel like you

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Speaker 3: took calligraphy classes severally caligraphy, it's more like twelve year

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Speaker 3: old girl hand right. Yeah, you expect to see like

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Speaker 3: a heart above.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I can hear the jealousy in all your voices.

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Speaker 2: Number six.

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Speaker 1: A guy hitting on me at a bar in Los

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Speaker 1: Angeles proudly bragged that he was just in a National

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Speaker 1: pedigree commercial pedigree as in the dog food. He then

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Speaker 1: told me they took a close up of his hand

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Speaker 1: opening a can from a cane opener.

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Speaker 3: Wow, I would kind of want to see his hands

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Speaker 3: up close, though, After he told me, let me see.

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Speaker 2: Can I get a high five? Yeah? They really should have,

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Speaker 2: like the Hottest hands in Hollywood list.

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Speaker 4: Those hand models make a lot.

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Speaker 3: I could never be one.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, weird vein or something. Yeah, you're disqualified. My hands

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Speaker 2: to Harry.

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Speaker 1: Number five from the list. My cousin bragged that he

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Speaker 1: had never used sunscreen in his life.

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Speaker 2: He said this.

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Speaker 1: While he was peeling off all of his burnt dead

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Speaker 1: skin in our shared hotel room while on vacation in Mexico.

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Speaker 3: We're not snakes.

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Speaker 2: I'm supposed to happen, but the snakes do think that's

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Speaker 2: a pretty cool flex. Yeah, damn, bro, look at all

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Speaker 2: that skin coming off you.

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Speaker 1: Number four. A patient bragged about not drinking water. She

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Speaker 1: told me she said if God wanted her to drink water,

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Speaker 1: he would have made it taste better. I remember hanging

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Speaker 1: out with this girl and she was like, I don't

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Speaker 1: drink water.

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Speaker 2: All I drink is diet coke.

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Speaker 1: And I'm like that's really bad, and she's like, there's

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Speaker 1: water in diet coke.

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Speaker 2: So I tried to sneak.

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Speaker 1: Like water, Like I would try to pour a little

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Speaker 1: more water in her diet coke when she wasn't looking

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Speaker 1: a toddler.

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Speaker 3: I know, I'm just drinking the kids juices.

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Speaker 2: If you're just joining us.

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Speaker 1: We're talking about the weirdest flexes that people have ever

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Speaker 1: said to others, genuinely thinking they're cool because of it.

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Speaker 1: Number three, someone was proud of the themselves for once

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Speaker 1: chugging an entire one gallon jar of straight pickle juice,

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Speaker 1: which ended up destroying the lining of their stomach.

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Speaker 4: Was so much, I feel like my stomach could handle it.

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Speaker 4: I don't know, I have the stomach steel. I think

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Speaker 4: you could take that vinegar like a champ next.

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Speaker 1: Year's summer challenge. I think I know what Brook's going

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Speaker 1: to be doing.

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Speaker 2: Gallon, I know.

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Speaker 1: Number two someone bragged about living in Italy for nine

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Speaker 1: years and never once.

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Speaker 2: Eating the local cuisine.

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Speaker 1: Instead, he said he used to drive forty five minutes

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Speaker 1: to a McDonald's almost every single day.

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Speaker 3: Like illegal, he was banished from Italy.

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Speaker 1: Although McDonald's probably has some pretty good stuff in the better.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, you might be better than the local cuisine. On

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Speaker 2: that one.

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Speaker 1: And the number one weirdest flex someone ever said with

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Speaker 1: a straight face, thinking they're cool because of it. My

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Speaker 1: ex boss told me he doesn't even know the name

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Speaker 1: of his son, or exactly how old he is, what

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Speaker 1: that is his son and his wife live in the

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Speaker 1: same house as him.

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Speaker 2: He's just a total jerk.

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Speaker 1: Oh my god.

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Speaker 2: And there are people that pride themselves on that too.

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Speaker 2: They're like, oh, I'm a jerk.

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Speaker 1: I love it.

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Speaker 2: Makes the hold of.

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Speaker 3: His wife because I think she needs some help, she

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Speaker 3: needs to get out of that.

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Speaker 1: If you could remember what her name was, then we

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Speaker 1: might be able to kind of.

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Speaker 2: When I get those were the.

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Speaker 1: Weirdest, most horrible flexes that people ever said they were cool.

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Speaker 2: Your phone's apps coming up right after this freaking Jeffrey

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Speaker 2: in the morning