Speaker 1: Ridiculous Crime is a production of iHeartRadio Zarah.
Speaker 2: Yes, Hell Hello, Sorry, I was buried under some interns.
Speaker 3: Oh were you?
Speaker 2: Yeah, you're having a cuttle fight.
Speaker 3: That's I'm gonna tell each charge.
Speaker 2: Oh that sounds bad. It sounds really their four legged interns.
Speaker 3: Elisam okay, well, okay, so bad. You know what's ridiculous?
Speaker 2: Yes I do.
Speaker 3: Oh spill it, sister.
Speaker 2: Okay. So I was very excited to learn that the
Speaker 2: Ghanaian seti, their unit of currency, was the world's best
Speaker 2: performing currency in twenty twenty five. Oh good, Yeah, that's
Speaker 2: not ridiculous. So that's good. But it did it searts
Speaker 2: nearly fifty percent in value against the US dollars.
Speaker 3: I'm suspicious, but this is good.
Speaker 2: Yeah. No, And then this has caused some problems back home. Right,
Speaker 2: so there are people who are not super fond of this,
Speaker 2: like well, for instance, the goods have become more expensive,
Speaker 2: like inflationary proper.
Speaker 3: Yeah.
Speaker 2: So there's a group of people who've been now petitioning
Speaker 2: the government for change, right and well, I'll just read
Speaker 2: it to you. They are The group is called the
Speaker 2: Ghana Drunkards Association, and they have issued a three week
Speaker 2: ultimatum to the government to reduce the price of alcoholic beverages.
Speaker 2: They claim to have sixteen million members nationwide and they're
Speaker 2: going to stage a massive demonstration if they're demand for
Speaker 2: lower priced alcohol and other drinks. They point out not
Speaker 2: just alcohol, but all these drinks are and to date,
Speaker 2: quote the price of alcoholic drinks keeps going up. If
Speaker 2: you purchase alcohol, there's an increment about fifteen percent, and
Speaker 2: this affects vendors. We've learned that the set he has
Speaker 2: gained some strength, and prices of some items have been reduced. However,
Speaker 2: the cost of alcohol remains high. And so they're upset
Speaker 2: because they're like, this is part of our culture. So
Speaker 2: I mean, they literally say that we have given them,
Speaker 2: the government a three week grace period to meet us
Speaker 2: so we can deliberate on how to reduce the prices
Speaker 2: of alcohol. They're a very serious group of drunkards, Elizabeth.
Speaker 3: And they're going to do a protest, yes, notably to
Speaker 3: boycott the alcohol.
Speaker 2: Well you know, no, no, come on, be ridiculous. Yeah,
Speaker 2: but they said, we're not just concerned about drinking for fun.
Speaker 2: This is our livelihood and social fabric. When alcohol becomes
Speaker 2: too expensive, it affects our community and economy and culture. Yeah,
Speaker 2: so they were talking to the Guinahan government good luck,
Speaker 2: con and Druggards Association Luck ridiculous.
Speaker 3: That is one hundred percent ridiculous. Do you want to
Speaker 3: know what else is ridiculous? Yeah, getting arrested for being
Speaker 3: crazy when the truth is Saren, We're all crazy.
Speaker 4: That's true, that's so true.
Speaker 3: This is Ridiculous Crime A podcast about absurd and outrageous capers,
Speaker 3: heists and cons. It's always ny nine percent murder free
Speaker 3: and one hundred percent ridiculous. Yeah.
Speaker 2: You damn.
Speaker 3: Said before, and I'll say it again. Yes, I love
Speaker 3: a good character, you do. I love a good eccentric.
Speaker 2: You will text me when you find one.
Speaker 3: We we need weirdos, you need them, and I feel
Speaker 3: like our current society seriously shuns them. You think so, well, Yeah,
Speaker 3: I'm talking about like genuine weirdos.
Speaker 2: Not people who want people doing it for the ground.
Speaker 3: Yeah. And it's not attention seeking behavior and it's not
Speaker 3: negatively impacting others.
Speaker 2: Ah, it's so social mavericks.
Speaker 1: Yes, people who.
Speaker 3: Are they're just out there.
Speaker 2: They're like, I got to live by my own rules.
Speaker 3: Yeah, it ain't hurting nobody here in the Bay Area.
Speaker 3: That used to be common. Yes, people living on the fringe,
Speaker 3: like being aborious, like existing way beyond the present in
Speaker 3: terms of how they saw the world and the way
Speaker 3: they expressed them.
Speaker 2: A lot of rainbow children, Star warriors.
Speaker 3: Yeah, and that died out. It was it was run
Speaker 3: off by tech money.
Speaker 2: Really could honest literally could.
Speaker 3: Like the tech folks. They all wear the same clothes.
Speaker 3: And I'm painting with a broad brush purposefully.
Speaker 2: Of course, they like to eat.
Speaker 3: And shop at chain places because it will always be
Speaker 3: the same wherever they go at upscale chains. But you know,
Speaker 3: still sure, And don't say I'm overstating it, because I've
Speaker 3: seen it with my own eyes, own.
Speaker 2: Eyes, you know, I've entered that into my Yeah, it's
Speaker 2: part of the bit, I.
Speaker 3: Says, says I.
Speaker 2: I love that, Ah Streeter.
Speaker 3: So, in honor of the San Francisco weirdos, in honor
Speaker 3: of the crazy dreamers everywhere, in honor of those who
Speaker 3: create their own reality for the benefit of humankind, I
Speaker 3: have a guy for you today.
Speaker 2: Who is it?
Speaker 3: This is an ode to an outsider in praise of
Speaker 3: the eccentriccentric. I mentioned this guy a little while ago,
Speaker 3: saying I should do an episode about him. This guy,
Speaker 3: Joshua Abraham Norton aka Emperor Norton aka Norton, the first
Speaker 3: Emperor the United States and Protector of Mexico.
Speaker 2: Totally.
Speaker 3: He is one of my favorite San Francisco Gold Rush characters,
Speaker 3: and he's actually one of my favorite characters full stop.
Speaker 2: Large.
Speaker 3: A year or two ago, you invited me to come
Speaker 3: with you as you went on the Emperor Norton Historical
Speaker 3: walking Tour in San francs.
Speaker 1: Yes.
Speaker 3: It was like a private It was just.
Speaker 2: Us and the three of us walking around San Francisco. Good.
Speaker 3: Amazing, I was. It was not something I would have
Speaker 3: imagined that I'd love as much as I did. It
Speaker 3: was fascinating, engaging the guy who plays Norton totally fabulous
Speaker 3: if you ever have a chance to recommend it. So good.
Speaker 3: One thing that stuck with me when was when we
Speaker 3: were walking down the street, if we passed a cop
Speaker 3: on foot, they'd salute the Emperor and say Emperor yes. Yeah,
Speaker 3: And apparently that's what cops back and the day did
Speaker 3: for the real Emperor tition. Yeah. But when that's back
Speaker 3: when weirdos were allowed, so to have the cops today
Speaker 3: do the same thing for the guy leading a walking
Speaker 3: tour while in costume. Felt like a little slice of
Speaker 3: old San Francisco totally because the guy who plays Norton,
Speaker 3: he's an eccentric type too. I love him. He's like
Speaker 3: classic San Francisco.
Speaker 2: He's a clamper too, so he's into the whole, like
Speaker 2: keeping things weird.
Speaker 3: Yes, and so it's eccentric San Francisco in my mind,
Speaker 3: real San Francisco. So let me regale you with the
Speaker 3: tale of real Emperor Norse.
Speaker 2: I love this.
Speaker 3: Please no Norton. He was born in England to Jewish parents
Speaker 3: in eighteen eighteen. Okay, his dad was a farmer and
Speaker 3: then a merchant, and when he was two years old,
Speaker 3: his parents moved the family to South Africa. They went
Speaker 3: as part of this like colonial effort. British colonists were
Speaker 3: sent by the UK government to live in the Eastern
Speaker 3: Cape of South Africa.
Speaker 2: Okay, yeah, they're trying to take over for the Boers
Speaker 2: that yeah.
Speaker 3: So by eighteen thirty nine he was living in Port Elizabeth,
Speaker 3: South Africa. He and his brother in law started a
Speaker 3: business together but it flopped and then it lasted only
Speaker 3: like a year and a half. He bummed around, He
Speaker 3: worked for his dad for a little bit, and then
Speaker 3: he was like an auctioneer. But then he had this
Speaker 3: urge to move, so he hopped on a ship to
Speaker 3: Liverpool and from there he headed to Boston. Shipping up
Speaker 3: to Boston. That was like eighteen forty six or so.
Speaker 3: By eighteen forty nine, the fateful year of gold discovery
Speaker 3: in the Hills, Norton was in San Francisco already. Oh yeah,
Speaker 3: he was there. So later accounts would say, quote in
Speaker 3: eighteen forty nine, on the fifth day of November, Norton
Speaker 3: arrived in San Francisco from the Cape of Good Hope
Speaker 3: via Rio de Janio and Valparaiso. So legend was that
Speaker 3: he arrived in San Francisco with forty thousand dollars on him.
Speaker 2: Damn.
Speaker 3: There is also a speculation that in between Boston and
Speaker 3: San Francisco it was like three year period that he'd
Speaker 3: stopped off in South America and done business there and
Speaker 3: made serious cash. So whether like the some thought that
Speaker 3: the forty thousand was like an inherent tints from his
Speaker 3: father either way, or if it's just like a juiced
Speaker 3: up version, we can only speculate either way.
Speaker 2: He's got stack.
Speaker 3: He's got stacks. This author, Theodore Kertschoff. He wrote a
Speaker 3: series of essays in eighteen eighty six in German called
Speaker 3: Californish Colt will be the I'm saying, so it looks
Speaker 3: like Californish culture builder. Okay, but it's like cult Bielda. Anyway,
Speaker 3: it's an amazing name. I want our friend Derek to
Speaker 3: make a vehicle named after that.
Speaker 2: My German friend Derek, you are, you know, beloved.
Speaker 3: He's a major friend of the show. He's like, he's
Speaker 3: an honorary intern. Really, I'd say so, even though he
Speaker 3: has two legs and so forth.
Speaker 2: It's true.
Speaker 3: Yeah. So anyway, it translates to Californian cultural images. Oh
Speaker 3: not California culture Builder, which I think is cooler, but
Speaker 3: either way sounds good.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 3: So he said that Norton was one of seven passengers
Speaker 3: aboard the steamer Francesca out of Rio headed for the
Speaker 3: Bay San Francisco Bay on the twenty third of November
Speaker 3: eighteen forty nine, and so that that was a gold
Speaker 3: fever boat, right. Yeah, we have records that the boat arrived,
Speaker 3: but not who was on it. And that was really
Speaker 3: really common at the time. It was just a free
Speaker 3: for all.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm sure that the purser jumped ship.
Speaker 3: Yeah yeah, there's no immigration station there nothing. You just
Speaker 3: jump off the boat and run.
Speaker 2: Because it's not a state closed down.
Speaker 3: You're like, and there's a record of ships, but that's
Speaker 3: because they were hauling cargo and stuff like that. So
Speaker 3: let's go with this as our truth here. That's how
Speaker 3: he got there. So no matter how it happened, he
Speaker 3: wasted no time setting up shop. He set up a
Speaker 3: real estate and import business called Joshua Norton and Company.
Speaker 3: That's as plexible title. And it was a success. In
Speaker 3: just three years. He turned a two to a four,
Speaker 3: turned a four to an eighth. So what was forty
Speaker 3: grand when he first got here? By eighteen fifty one
Speaker 3: he had two hundred and fifty grand. Wow, that's more
Speaker 3: than eight million dollars today. Damn.
Speaker 2: He's not a businessman, he's a business man. Yeah.
Speaker 3: So Norton from just another guy showing up to the
Speaker 3: gold Rush to like a successful businessman respected by the community.
Speaker 3: He was in with the city's elites. He joined all
Speaker 3: the good social clubs. The Swells invited him to all
Speaker 3: these amazing parties, he networked with the best of them.
Speaker 3: He had totally made it in this fantastic boom town.
Speaker 3: But saren, Yeah, it wouldn't last.
Speaker 2: Oh what happened?
Speaker 3: He made all the right choices until he didn't. What
Speaker 3: can we explain this to you?
Speaker 2: You see, I wonder where he could go wrong. He's
Speaker 2: doing so well.
Speaker 3: It's amazing. Okay. So eighteen fifty two, there's a famine
Speaker 3: in China. Things are dire so coming out of the
Speaker 3: First Opium War in the Treaty of Nanking, the Chinese
Speaker 3: were on the losing end of that agreement with the British,
Speaker 3: and so you add in then the Taiping Rebellion, there's
Speaker 3: a drought. So between eighteen fifty one and eighteen seventy three,
Speaker 3: ten to thirty million people died of starvation. They're just
Speaker 3: not they do. Don't have it.
Speaker 2: Humiliations, they call it.
Speaker 3: Right. So there's a rice shortage in San Francisco. Okay,
Speaker 3: rice prices as a result of this, rice prices.
Speaker 2: Spiked because all the rice is going to China.
Speaker 3: It's coming it was coming from China.
Speaker 2: Oh, and they're just holding they're just holding onto their own.
Speaker 3: Yeah, they didn't have the rice production in California, like they.
Speaker 2: Have Oh, interesting, so that's a more modern Yeah yeah.
Speaker 3: So I mean there really there was nothing going on
Speaker 3: in Central Valley.
Speaker 2: Like that's why I thought they got to feed people
Speaker 2: that rice is a cheap starch.
Speaker 3: Yeah. So the rice prices it was, they were up
Speaker 3: nine hundred percent. Yeah. An importer came to Norton and said, look,
Speaker 3: I had this huge opportunity. You can corner the market
Speaker 3: on rice in San Francisco. There's a shipment of rice
Speaker 3: coming from Peru, and you can buy it at twelve
Speaker 3: and a half cents a pound as opposed to the
Speaker 3: going rate of thirty six cents a pound. Huh, and
Speaker 3: it's only Yeah, it's going to cost you twenty five
Speaker 3: grand and then you can flip it. So he's like, yeah,
Speaker 3: it gives them a two grand deposit on the contract.
Speaker 3: The boat was scheduled to arrive December twenty second, eighteen
Speaker 3: fifty two. He was stoked. He was about to make
Speaker 3: serious cash. He had the cash on delivery money ready.
Speaker 3: Twenty three thousand dollars. Ship comes into harbor, unloads, Norton
Speaker 3: pays up. He's sitting on white gold seriously. But then
Speaker 3: more ships started showing up from Peru and full of rice.
Speaker 2: Oh so that wasn't the that was the only one shift.
Speaker 3: After another with way better rice on board.
Speaker 2: That's all I was thinking is that anywhere the Spanish
Speaker 2: would have been there were they would have had rice
Speaker 2: start being cultivated exactly.
Speaker 3: So he gets America like it's like the crud rice,
Speaker 3: and then like the.
Speaker 2: Goods, he doesn't even get the goods st No, so the.
Speaker 3: Good stuff starts, you know, coming in the market's flooded.
Speaker 3: Rice goes down to three cents a pounds and he
Speaker 3: is thinking he's buying it at twelve and a half cents.
Speaker 3: So Buddy's underwater on a boatload of subpar res. He'd
Speaker 3: been had bamboozled, so he tried to get the contract
Speaker 3: nullified on the grounds of fraud. The fight went to court,
Speaker 3: wound its way through there for two years, and it
Speaker 3: wasn't a cheap fight.
Speaker 2: No, he's got paid the legal.
Speaker 3: Cost him and then bankrupted him. Basically. In October of
Speaker 3: eighteen fifty four, he finally lost. The California Supreme Court
Speaker 3: ruled that the contract held What Yeah, so there he is,
Speaker 3: He's broke, dejected, He couldn't jumpstart his business because he's
Speaker 3: his cash is gone. So he ran for office as
Speaker 3: you do. Eighteen fifty five, He's like, I want to
Speaker 3: be in charge.
Speaker 2: Is that right?
Speaker 3: He ran for San Francisco tax collector in eighteen two, Sara.
Speaker 3: He did not win.
Speaker 2: I'm guessing not.
Speaker 3: Filed for bankruptcy in eighteen fifty six on the August
Speaker 3: twenty fifth, eighteen fifty rice. Yeah, rice a'rony the.
Speaker 2: San Francisco tree. The irony of this, I know it
Speaker 2: runs deep.
Speaker 3: So the San Francisco Daily Evening Bulletin they published a notice.
Speaker 3: In August of eighteen fifty six, Joshua Norton filed a
Speaker 3: petition for the benefit of the insolvency law. Liabilities fifty
Speaker 3: five eight eleven dollars, assets stated at fifteen thousand dollars
Speaker 3: uncertain in value.
Speaker 2: Whoa, So he lost everything, lost everything off of one
Speaker 2: attempt at corner. So he gets got too greedy in
Speaker 2: a sense.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I think he thought I'm going to get one up.
Speaker 2: On it everybody. And again it's he didn't investigate the
Speaker 2: rice market of South America. No, he didn't really recognize
Speaker 2: that how many there were rice coming before you make
Speaker 2: a purchase that big you need to know a little
Speaker 2: bit about the mark.
Speaker 3: All the right choices. Until he didn't.
Speaker 2: They got it.
Speaker 3: Wow. So this is like a tipping point for him.
Speaker 3: He lost touch with reality. And in eighteen fifty eight
Speaker 3: he made an announcement he's running for Senate, and when
Speaker 3: people headed to the polls the next year, his name
Speaker 3: wasn't on the ballot. It was like just a general announcement.
Speaker 3: He didn't file.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and then he's like, oh, get into bars, open doors.
Speaker 3: So he's this ailed businessman. He's lost everything, he lost
Speaker 3: his fancy digs. He was at this point, he's living
Speaker 3: in a boarding house.
Speaker 2: He has no family, no wife, no maub himself.
Speaker 3: Gone are the glamorous parties, the social set had like
Speaker 3: passed him up.
Speaker 2: Of course, the connections in.
Speaker 3: The power gone. And it's not that he'd lost his mind.
Speaker 3: He was still sharp and insightful. He'd lost faith in
Speaker 3: the system. He kind of broke him. He's disillusioned with everything.
Speaker 3: He felt that he had to help get everything, society, people,
Speaker 3: the city back on track. He could do it. He
Speaker 3: could get people back to where they needed to be.
Speaker 2: Yeah, the world's out off kilter.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean he tried sales for a little while
Speaker 3: after his bankruptcy. Ran an ad in the paper offering
Speaker 3: China sugars for sale, but it wasn't a goer. I
Speaker 3: don't even know what that is. Yeah, China sugar product.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 3: So for a few years he scraped by. He was
Speaker 3: living in this cheap boarding house, staying under the radar. Yeah,
Speaker 3: quite a change from his earlier days. But then he
Speaker 3: made a splash. In July of eighteen fifty nine, he
Speaker 3: took out an ad in the San Francisco Daily Evening
Speaker 3: Bulletin newspaper. It wasn't so much an ad as a manifesto.
Speaker 3: It reads as follows manifesto from Joshua Norton, Citizens of
Speaker 3: the Union. The Union is threatened with dissolution. Dissensions exist
Speaker 3: between the North and South. Measures affecting the general welfare
Speaker 3: cannot be got through Congress. Confidence ceases to exist with
Speaker 3: foreigners in the integrity and stability of the institutions of
Speaker 3: the country. Will you inaugurate a new state of things?
Speaker 3: Joshua Norton. So it's like, oh, what is this?
Speaker 2: Does he understand a manifesto is not supposed to be
Speaker 2: an open question.
Speaker 3: No, it's you know, he's.
Speaker 2: A manifesto, are you guys juting it so like you know,
Speaker 2: but it's.
Speaker 3: Like pretty much your basic crackpot stuff totally having worked
Speaker 3: in municipal government for a period of time, like this
Speaker 3: the stuff you.
Speaker 2: Get the city council.
Speaker 3: You got three minutes, yes, but then two months later
Speaker 3: he's back with another message like this is like pre
Speaker 3: Zodiac good messages. At the peremptory request of a large
Speaker 3: majority of the citizens of these United States, I Joshua Norton,
Speaker 3: formerly of al Goa Bay, Cape of Good Hope, and
Speaker 3: now for the last nine years and ten months past,
Speaker 3: of San Francisco, California, declare and proclaim myself Emperor of
Speaker 3: these United States, And, in virtue of the authority thereby
Speaker 3: and me vested, do hereby order and direct the representatives
Speaker 3: of the different States of the Union to assemble in
Speaker 3: Musical Hall in this city on the first day of
Speaker 3: February next then and there to make such alterations in
Speaker 3: the existing laws of the Union as may ameliorate the
Speaker 3: evils under which the country is laboring, and thereby cause
Speaker 3: confidence to exist both at home and abroad in our
Speaker 3: stability and integrity. Norton the first Emperor of the United States.
Speaker 2: If you're going to lose your marbles, have fun with her,
Speaker 2: have a blast. If your country is in civil war,
Speaker 2: be the one I'm gonna have.
Speaker 3: I'm going to be the voice. I'll do it fine.
Speaker 3: Everyone wants me to do it. No longer. Joshua Norton,
Speaker 3: He's now Norton, the first Emperor of the United States.
Speaker 3: So his message ran in the paper, not as a
Speaker 3: proclamation or called arms, but as a comic bit is
Speaker 3: the way they the paper's fund it, like, oh, what
Speaker 3: an eccentric we have on our hands type thing. And
Speaker 3: from that moment until he took his last breath, Joshua
Speaker 3: Norton was now emperor in the eyes of the good
Speaker 3: people of San Francisco for real. So according to this
Speaker 3: documentary Timothy speed Levitch quote, some say he'd gone mad,
Speaker 3: others say he'd gone wise.
Speaker 2: Distinction.
Speaker 3: Yeah, let's take a break and I'll tell you more
Speaker 3: about Joshua Norton and his grand visions when we get back, Zaren, Yes, Okay,
Speaker 3: So Joshua Norton, Dude.
Speaker 2: I'm loving Norton the first because of one thing, Elizabeth
Speaker 2: that people just asked me when I was young like,
Speaker 2: what do you want to do it for a living?
Speaker 2: And I thought this was a career path. Apparently it's not.
Speaker 2: Is I wanted to be a holy fool. I saw
Speaker 2: what they got to do, and I'm like, that's the move, right,
Speaker 2: you just get to live in your own world. And
Speaker 2: everyone's like, oh, we just let him do this thing.
Speaker 2: How do you do that? He nailed it, He figured
Speaker 2: it out. You got to go bigger than I thought.
Speaker 2: He's like, I'm gonna be emperor.
Speaker 3: He hit the sweet spot right like this time and
Speaker 3: place totally.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 3: So he was keeping himself busy with lots of decrees
Speaker 3: he got to. He'd hand them off to the local papers.
Speaker 3: They were happy to run them because like, this is
Speaker 3: great copy and it wasn't limited to San Francisco papers.
Speaker 3: They would run them and then those would get picked
Speaker 3: up by wire services and they ran all over the country.
Speaker 2: Oh for real? Oh yeah, the syndicated the brother.
Speaker 3: Yes, so just like and it just built up the
Speaker 3: like San Francisco's coooky reputation for decades.
Speaker 2: Yeah, he helped the stabblers to come.
Speaker 3: Yeah. So on October twelfth, eighteen fifty nine, he called
Speaker 3: for the formal abolition of the United States Congress.
Speaker 2: A very popular and again.
Speaker 3: He invited everyone to meet up at the musical hall
Speaker 3: in February of eighteen sixty.
Speaker 2: The great American music called San Francisco.
Speaker 3: No, it just doesn't exist anymore. He was like, let's
Speaker 3: do this, folks, let's gather, let's tear tear it. Let's
Speaker 3: get together and.
Speaker 2: Tear it all down, show up at the music hall.
Speaker 3: So through eighteen sixty one he ran ten more proclamations.
Speaker 3: Let me give you some highlights. October twenty fourth and
Speaker 3: twenty seventh of eighteen fifty nine, he went after the
Speaker 3: California Supreme Court. He first invited appeals to his authority.
Speaker 3: Then he officially abolished the state Supreme Court. Remember you
Speaker 3: know he had that beef against the rifies.
Speaker 2: They made him poor.
Speaker 3: Yeah, so they'll pay for that. November third, eighteen fifty
Speaker 3: he censured defamatory publications. So he said that quote scurrilous
Speaker 3: and untrue articles shall not insult the nation's honesty, just
Speaker 3: in general. Just don't lie.
Speaker 2: So like, don't stop it, France.
Speaker 3: You stop it. No, he's talking about the public papers.
Speaker 3: No more yellow journalism. Off knock it off, pals.
Speaker 2: So he wasn't like badmouth America in your press is
Speaker 2: American press.
Speaker 3: You're making us all dishonest.
Speaker 2: Okay, Yeah, I like that.
Speaker 3: November seventeenth, eighteen fifty nine, he condemned the John Brown
Speaker 3: Insurrection issued a proclamation alerting that quote treasonable and malignant
Speaker 3: motives in Virginia and Maryland must be punished, even at
Speaker 3: the risk of bloodshed. Just an interesting position for him
Speaker 3: to take, given his later views. December twenty eighth, eighteen
Speaker 3: fifty nine, he then removed Virginia Governor Henry Wise Oh
Speaker 3: for hanging John Brown, and he appointed John C. Breckenridge's replacement.
Speaker 3: Kind of an about face.
Speaker 2: Wow, he really flipped on that one.
Speaker 3: He did a flip, but he kind of he thought
Speaker 3: about it a little more than he's like, you know what,
Speaker 3: I'm going to pull this governor. He's bad, he's bad
Speaker 3: business problem.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 3: January fourth, eighteen sixty, he summoned the US Army to
Speaker 3: depose Congress. He ordered military action against Congress because no
Speaker 3: one was enforcing his decrees.
Speaker 2: Oh, so he's like turning the cannons on Congress.
Speaker 3: Yes. And I need to note here that the February first,
Speaker 3: eighteen sixty music Hall had to be rescheduled because the place.
Speaker 3: So the place burned down on January twenty third, Oh like,
Speaker 3: no worries. On January twenty eighth, he made another decree
Speaker 3: that the venue would be moved to the Assembly Hall,
Speaker 3: and that would be February fifth.
Speaker 2: To update your calendar.
Speaker 3: So you know, slight little adjustment.
Speaker 2: Down the street. Don't worry, convenience. February five, refreshing eighteen.
Speaker 3: Sixty, he called a national convention. He wanted representative all
Speaker 3: the states to come to a different music hall.
Speaker 2: Plats music hall on the music hall.
Speaker 3: Yeah, party, different music hall. We're going to ameliorate the
Speaker 3: nation's ills, guys. But just like posse up, yeah, les,
Speaker 3: here's a big dog one sure. On July sixteenth, eighteen sixty,
Speaker 3: he dissolved the United States of America, the whole thing.
Speaker 2: Yeah, he declared, finally somewhat brave enough to do it.
Speaker 3: He declared the Republic dissolved, and he advocated for a
Speaker 3: temporary monarchy. Was like I'm doing my Rodney Dangerfield collar pole.
Speaker 2: So he basically saying, we'll keep this United States part
Speaker 2: and America part, but it's now no longer republicsh no longer.
Speaker 2: It's under I'm the captain. Would you be an empire?
Speaker 3: He's the emperor, I think, so, you know whatever. So
Speaker 3: he slowed down a little on the decrease after.
Speaker 2: That, Oh, I took it out of He's pretty much
Speaker 2: gone to the top.
Speaker 3: What was there to do? He didn't stop. In eighteen
Speaker 3: sixty one, he expanded his title. So there was unrest
Speaker 3: in Mexico and he figured they needed his help, so
Speaker 3: he changed his title to Emperor of the United States
Speaker 3: and Mexico.
Speaker 2: It was also a big move eighteen sixty one. I mean,
Speaker 2: the United States is in civil war. He doesn't know
Speaker 2: that's going to.
Speaker 3: Play out right, quite frankly, where he was in San
Speaker 3: Francisco had been Mexico exactly.
Speaker 2: Let's reconnect this matter.
Speaker 3: Yeah, But then he thought better of it the next
Speaker 3: year and he decided to be Emperor of the United
Speaker 3: States and Protector of Mexico.
Speaker 2: It's more, Yeah, he's like, they're good on their own.
Speaker 2: I just want to like shield them.
Speaker 3: I'm going to protect that. Yeah. So eighteen sixty two,
Speaker 3: he demanded that Catholic and Protestant churches formally ordain him
Speaker 3: emperor in response to the divisions causing the Civil War,
Speaker 3: like apparent, Yeah, it wasn't so much a sectarian thing,
Speaker 3: but you know, okay, well, yes, July twenty fifth, eighteen
Speaker 3: sixty ninety, went futurist.
Speaker 4: Ooh.
Speaker 3: He announced his support of this like innovative airship. In fact,
Speaker 3: he ordered San Franciscans to provide financial backing for Frederick
Speaker 3: Marriott's airship experiments. I'm digging that's a sign of the
Speaker 3: tech industry to come.
Speaker 2: Future thinking. I love this, and also like, that's really
Speaker 2: early on that.
Speaker 3: Yeah. He August twelfth, eighteen sixty nine, swinging for the fences,
Speaker 3: but in something that made sense if you were living
Speaker 3: under an emperor. He abolished major political parties.
Speaker 2: Of course, you don't need them anymore.
Speaker 3: He officially. He officially dissolved both the Democratic and Republican
Speaker 3: parties in order to quell partisan strife. I can get
Speaker 3: with that, sure. Between eighteen sixty eight and eighteen seventy eight,
Speaker 3: he released a flurry of proclamations, more than seventeen defending
Speaker 3: the rights of the Chinese in America. He wanted equal
Speaker 3: treatment for Chinese immigrants, including the including He demanded admission
Speaker 3: of Chinese testimony in courts.
Speaker 2: Oh, yeah, because it couldn't testify it.
Speaker 3: And this is even before the Chinese Exclusion Act of
Speaker 3: eighteen eighty two.
Speaker 2: Just about to say, it's just so.
Speaker 3: He saw how poorly Chinese immigrants in San Francisco were treated.
Speaker 3: They were the working backbone of the city and they
Speaker 3: contributed greatly and still due to the culture and spirit
Speaker 3: of San Francisco. Pained him to see how they were
Speaker 3: mistreated and abused. There's this one from.
Speaker 2: April Chinatown, right right where he is.
Speaker 3: Yeah, so there's this one from April eighteen seventy six
Speaker 3: proclamation by Emperor Norton. Whereas the attempted legislation of the
Speaker 3: State and City of San Francisco to offer an indignity
Speaker 3: to the Chinese will bring the American lawmakers into contempt.
Speaker 3: And whereas we are determined to keep inviolate our treaty
Speaker 3: obligations between the Empire of China and the United States. Now, therefore,
Speaker 3: we Norton, the First Dia Grascia, Emperor, do hereby order
Speaker 3: the military and police authorities to arrest and have promptly
Speaker 3: punished all persons who shall counsel any outrage or in
Speaker 3: dignity against the Chinese.
Speaker 2: First, I love it.
Speaker 3: Also, he's got the language so good and the all
Speaker 3: caps whereas oh, well, his proclamations were often before their time,
Speaker 3: like the airship thing. He spoke out against corruption and
Speaker 3: fraud of all corporate political personal He supported women's suffrage.
Speaker 2: Damn.
Speaker 3: He demanded fair treatment and enhanced legal protections for not
Speaker 3: just Chinese immigrants, but all immigrants and all racial and
Speaker 3: ethnic minorities. Yeah. For instance, he decreed that black people
Speaker 3: should be allowed to ride public street cars and be
Speaker 3: admitted to public schools across the nation.
Speaker 2: WHOA, Yeah, he desegregated in America.
Speaker 3: He did, like eighteen seventy in defensive days.
Speaker 2: It was actually before technically had been fully segregated. Because
Speaker 2: before you get to focus in, he's like, he's going
Speaker 2: to stop that.
Speaker 3: It's like, I know how they're all off.
Speaker 2: I can see how reconstruction's failing.
Speaker 3: Yeah. He defended Native Americans. He proclaimed, quote all Indian
Speaker 3: agents and other parties connected with frauds against the Indian
Speaker 3: tribes were to be publicly punished before as many quote
Speaker 3: Indian chiefs as could be assembled together.
Speaker 2: We're going to bring the Indian agents. Had the ice
Speaker 2: for Native American issues, at the time, He's like, look,
Speaker 2: we when bring the Indian chiefs together, make these guys
Speaker 2: get exactly. I think a lot of people get behind that.
Speaker 3: I think so if you were to classify his belief system,
Speaker 3: he was a religious humanist who didn't believe in organized religion.
Speaker 3: He saw Puritanism as a grave danger to society. He
Speaker 3: was a staunch believer in separation of church and state,
Speaker 3: so far even though he wanted the Catholics and the
Speaker 3: Protestants to deem him and you're.
Speaker 2: Going to have spots.
Speaker 3: He was strongly against blue laws.
Speaker 2: You want people to know to drink.
Speaker 3: Well, anything closed. If he had to force something to
Speaker 3: close on Sunday, or any probition of any commerce on Sunday,
Speaker 3: he said it quote discriminated against the Germans and the Jews.
Speaker 3: Huh the Germans they like their beer.
Speaker 2: Well, yeah, it's true, I guess. So.
Speaker 3: He believed in technology as a means of advancing social
Speaker 3: well being and prosperity. He believed in fair taxes and
Speaker 3: their applications towards a robust transportation infrastructure.
Speaker 2: I mean, there's a really good platform so to hear
Speaker 2: for it.
Speaker 3: In fact, he was the one who championed the idea
Speaker 3: for a bay bridge linking San Francisco to Oakland.
Speaker 2: That was his idea.
Speaker 3: Yeah, it was in response, Okay, there was Why did
Speaker 3: they call it the Emperor Norton Bridge. Well, that's there.
Speaker 3: They're trying to get it real. Yeah, there's a movement
Speaker 3: for that. So December eighteen seventy one, The Evening Bulletin
Speaker 3: ran an editorial about this proposal that the Central Pacific
Speaker 3: Railroad Company had. They wanted to build a bridge across
Speaker 3: San Francisco Bay at its narrowest point, and they wanted
Speaker 3: the people of San Francisco to underwrite a three million
Speaker 3: dollar bond issue to pay for the job. That's like
Speaker 3: eighty million today, which would be a bargain totally.
Speaker 2: Anyway, you couldn't build a road then, So.
Speaker 3: The Bulletin was firmly against this idea, mainly because the
Speaker 3: narrowest point was well south of San Francisco and would
Speaker 3: link to very rural areas on the East Bay. So
Speaker 3: it's like rural area to rural area. Scond to do.
Speaker 2: It's not helping anybody. It's like where we currently have
Speaker 2: the bridges at the bottom of the day, like.
Speaker 3: That Sano Bridge would be like where the Sanitaeio Bridge is.
Speaker 3: So Emperor Norton springs into action. He called for a
Speaker 3: bridge between San Francisco and Oakland via what is now
Speaker 3: You're ba Buena Island. It was Goat Island at the time.
Speaker 3: Boom Yeah. Then he doubled down and he demanded an
Speaker 3: underwater tunnel from San Francisco to Oakland.
Speaker 2: He nailed the Bart Tunnel.
Speaker 4: Room.
Speaker 3: People thought he was crazy, or like crazier than he
Speaker 3: already was. Sure, but history, as you said, bears him out.
Speaker 3: So the San Francisco Oakland Bay Bridge opened on November twelfth,
Speaker 3: nineteen thirty six, sixty four years after he argued for
Speaker 3: the exact same thing in the exact same place. You're
Speaker 3: bre Buena Island at all. The trans By Tube for
Speaker 3: Bay Area Rapid Transit BART opened September sixteenth, nineteen seventy four.
Speaker 3: That is a full one hundred and two years after
Speaker 3: he called for an underwater rail tunnel connecting Oakland San Francisco.
Speaker 2: He's like a Jules Vern he just saw it before
Speaker 2: other people said no.
Speaker 3: I mean, granted, not all of his proclamations were serious.
Speaker 2: Naturally.
Speaker 3: August thirty, first, eighteen seventy, he'd decreed, quote, let there
Speaker 3: be peace socially under penalty of grabbing the first young
Speaker 3: lady we can get our hands on. We command the
Speaker 3: ladies to forthwith supply us with an empress. Wait, what
Speaker 3: he's just like, find me a girlfriend.
Speaker 2: He's like, by decree, get me a woman. No, get
Speaker 2: me a girlfriend, and he's asking the ladies to find
Speaker 2: him one wrestle.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I love this social commentary in the San Francisco
Speaker 3: Chronicle from eighteen sixty five. Quote. We have received the
Speaker 3: following quote unquote proclamation from Emperor Norton, and presume that
Speaker 3: the fact of it having reference to operatic manners furnishes
Speaker 3: the reason of the chronicle being selected on this occasion
Speaker 3: as the medium for propagating the imperial will. So here
Speaker 3: it is the man that has no music in his
Speaker 3: soul is fit for treason, stratagem, and spoils. Let no
Speaker 3: such man be trusted. The Emperor's royal will and pleasure
Speaker 3: is that all his lady subjects should take their husbands
Speaker 3: and friends to the opera and refine and improve the
Speaker 3: public taste. The nation that supports music shows an advancement
Speaker 3: in civilization and refinement twenty one December eighteen sixty five,
Speaker 3: Norton the First.
Speaker 2: As a lady subject, Do you.
Speaker 3: Agree, amen, Yes, I totally agree with that. There's this
Speaker 3: nonsense from September of eighteen seventy quote. Whereas we have
Speaker 3: been informed that one phil Magilder alamagazumum wang doodlum Larium
Speaker 3: Murriam is engaged plotting with conspirators to usurp our prerogatives
Speaker 3: and is a traitor to our person and scepter. And
Speaker 3: whereas all movements of such nature tend to weaken the
Speaker 3: stability of our government at home and cause it to
Speaker 3: fall into the contempt and ridicule with foreign nations. Now, therefore,
Speaker 3: we Norton the First Dio Gratia, Emperor of the United
Speaker 3: States and Protector of Mexico, hereby decree that Philip Magilder
Speaker 3: Alama Gazulam wang doodlum Larium Murriam be appointed chief of
Speaker 3: Police to ex Emperor Louis Napoleon Boudaparte, and that be
Speaker 3: forthwith leave our realm to fill such appointment.
Speaker 2: Frands like you go be.
Speaker 3: The police achievement.
Speaker 2: Friend.
Speaker 3: I feel like there's some inside city joke here that
Speaker 3: I can't decode the name. I don't know who he's
Speaker 3: mocking whatever. You know, So he's going after someone who's like,
Speaker 3: you know who you are?
Speaker 2: Everybody know.
Speaker 3: Yeah, And that's what I find with a lot of
Speaker 3: old papers is they make statements and obviously are referencing
Speaker 3: something else that everyone knows about.
Speaker 2: Anyone. What was I think it's like kind of like
Speaker 2: the Becky with the good hair. It'd be really hard
Speaker 2: to know what that means in the future.
Speaker 3: Yeah, So what was ebraor Norton's life like on the
Speaker 3: day to day when he's writing all these proclamations. I'm
Speaker 3: so glad I asked you to ask that he started
Speaker 3: his morning by reading every single local paper, and there
Speaker 3: were more than just a few. Busy Yeah, and they
Speaker 3: need stroll around the city dressed in Imperial garb. So
Speaker 3: he wore a regimental uniform, sometimes a Union uniform, sometimes
Speaker 3: a Confederate uniform.
Speaker 2: He's just like, I got a bunch of these.
Speaker 3: Yeah, You're like whatever looked most official to him that day.
Speaker 3: He get the uniforms is like hand me down donations
Speaker 3: from the army base at the Presidio. And so he
Speaker 3: carried this huge hand carved walking stick, and when he
Speaker 3: was feeling fancy, he'd put on oversized gold epaulets on
Speaker 3: his uniform okay, and he'd carry a sword instead of
Speaker 3: the walking stick. And he wore a.
Speaker 2: Beaver hat brandished or like in a saber.
Speaker 3: Like in a saber.
Speaker 2: Okay, So it's it's on his hip. He's not like
Speaker 2: walking around like waving a somebody would.
Speaker 3: Like maybe gesticulate with it. Occasionally he wore a beaver
Speaker 3: hat with an ostrich How much this exactly he had
Speaker 3: is huge, yeah, huge ostrich plume in his hat. He
Speaker 3: always wore a carnation on his lapel is any meaning well,
Speaker 3: no flores would give him day old flowers that were
Speaker 3: beyond their cell by day, and so he would. They
Speaker 3: would just you know, as a.
Speaker 2: Courtesy to them.
Speaker 3: He wore shoes that he cut holes in his own
Speaker 3: shoes to relieve his corns.
Speaker 2: Oh god.
Speaker 3: Yeah. So in the afternoons he would go to the
Speaker 3: library and he read books there or he worked on
Speaker 3: his prop.
Speaker 2: Clamation reader the Emperor.
Speaker 3: Yeah, he played chess at the library.
Speaker 2: And now with a regular partner or just anybody.
Speaker 3: He'd go. In the evenings, he would go to like
Speaker 3: public debates or lectures.
Speaker 2: Yeah, talking series.
Speaker 3: Maybe he would sometimes go to the theater because the
Speaker 3: owners of the theaters held a prime seat for him
Speaker 3: on all opening nights. Really, yeah, he had his own
Speaker 3: He lived on other people's charity. So the Masons of
Speaker 3: which he had been a member in his original days,
Speaker 3: his old and his old business partners, they all paid
Speaker 3: his rent at the boarding house. The yeah, citizens bought
Speaker 3: him meals and drinks and like paid his general living expenses.
Speaker 3: He referred to these as taxes.
Speaker 2: I mean, he's going to be like an honor. If
Speaker 2: you see him in a restaurant, you go over and.
Speaker 3: Like let me, or the owners like please no sit.
Speaker 3: And he.
Speaker 2: Wanted to be a holy I don't even need money.
Speaker 3: But so like he started printing up his own promisory notes.
Speaker 3: They can in all these different denominations, So.
Speaker 2: He made his own money.
Speaker 3: Yeah, the notes were payable at seven percent interest in
Speaker 3: eighteen eighty I don't know, and most places in the
Speaker 3: city honored it as legal tender. And he was listed
Speaker 3: in the local directory and in the eighteen seventy census
Speaker 3: as emperor emperor nor in.
Speaker 2: The first and do you think people are exchanging them?
Speaker 2: Like you know, knowing that, like, oh, this will be
Speaker 2: good for you. If I can do this, you can
Speaker 2: then spend it over.
Speaker 3: I think I'll just eat the cost or whatever. But
Speaker 3: I've got this.
Speaker 2: Nobody's actually second time.
Speaker 3: I think it was just only from him.
Speaker 2: You only want to get him from me.
Speaker 3: You know, he was good for business totally. So imagine
Speaker 3: tourist shops sold little plaster figurines of him?
Speaker 2: Are you kidding?
Speaker 3: Because people were reading about him in.
Speaker 2: The paps no national internet exactly.
Speaker 3: So he lit his boarding house was at six twenty
Speaker 3: four Commercial Street, which was a nine by six room.
Speaker 3: It cost him fifty nine by six, nine by six,
Speaker 3: no closet, a little wash based.
Speaker 2: Nine by six and lie down in one direction.
Speaker 3: That block of Commercial is now named after him. In fact,
Speaker 3: you and I went to the dedications they renamed it.
Speaker 3: Do you know who worked three doors down at the
Speaker 3: morning call newspaper?
Speaker 2: Ok, I cheat and say I don't say it? Is
Speaker 2: it Mark Twain?
Speaker 3: Yes? It is Samuel Clemens. He was a huge fan
Speaker 3: of the Emperor.
Speaker 2: I love that. Yeah, and he knows you know. It's like,
Speaker 2: how do you never appreciate this?
Speaker 3: Exactly? Let's take a break and we'll get to the
Speaker 3: actual crime. I mean, we'll have some side quests first,
Speaker 3: but I do promise you a crime back in a flash.
Speaker 2: Zaren Elizabeth, We're back.
Speaker 3: One of my favorite Emperor Norton tales is about his dogs,
Speaker 3: Bummer and Lazarus.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 3: So Bummer and Lazarus. They are these two straight dogs
Speaker 3: who became beloved local celebrities in San Francisco during the
Speaker 3: eighteen sixties. They were known for their absolutely remarkable rat
Speaker 3: catching abilities. They had like street smarts, and they were
Speaker 3: really bonded together, and they were pretty much like the
Speaker 3: most famous dogs in the city's history. They were featured
Speaker 3: in newspaper columns and cartoons, especially those by Samuel Clemens.
Speaker 3: He wrote about him, Bummer was this like shaggy black
Speaker 3: Newfoundland or Newfoundland terrier mix who earned his name from
Speaker 3: bumming food from butchers and saloon patrons. Oh they like
Speaker 3: they you know, sitting at the bar and they're like,
Speaker 3: have a pickle. Oh, they're so cute. It's a big old,
Speaker 3: big old buddy. He became well known in the city
Speaker 3: around eighteen sixty because he was like an amazing rat killer.
Speaker 3: Like they'd turn him loose into a building and then
Speaker 3: like he'd kill fifty rats and kind out. Yeah, so
Speaker 3: a rat problem. They had a huge were probably in
Speaker 3: like basements of bars and restaurants and stuff. So Lazarus
Speaker 3: was a smaller mixed breed dog. He entered the picture
Speaker 3: when Bummer rescued him from a dogfight in eighteen sixty two.
Speaker 3: So Lazarus was like badly wounded. Bummer nursed him back
Speaker 3: to health, like in a doorway, hence the name, you know,
Speaker 3: Lazarus who was raised from the dead. So the pair
Speaker 3: they're inseparable. Newspapers like the Daily Morning Call.
Speaker 2: How did Bummer nurture Lazarus? I mean are you talking like?
Speaker 3: Yeah, like treated the wounds and then went out and
Speaker 3: would bum food and bring it back and then cuddle
Speaker 3: around Lazarus and just nursed him back cool. So like
Speaker 3: the Daily Morning Call, the Daily Alta, California, they published
Speaker 3: all these stories about the dogs, and they treated him
Speaker 3: like characters in a serialized novel. And at the time
Speaker 3: then street dogs were like often rounded up and euthanized.
Speaker 3: Bummer and Lazarus got official immune due to their popularity
Speaker 3: and how useful they were, and then it was extended
Speaker 3: to other dogs later when Lazarus was once arrested by
Speaker 3: a new dog catcher. There was this crazy public outcry
Speaker 3: and they got released the exactly. So over the years,
Speaker 3: stories emerged that Emperor Norton had adopted or was like
Speaker 3: always accompanied by Bummer.
Speaker 2: And Lazarus to travel together.
Speaker 3: Yeah, and like he treated them as his imperial guard
Speaker 3: dogs or companions, and like in some illustrations at the time,
Speaker 3: the three are shown walking together, with Bummer and Lazarus
Speaker 3: flanking the emperor as he patrolled the streets.
Speaker 2: Imagine three of them.
Speaker 3: Here's the thing, like, there's no really like reliable contemporary
Speaker 3: evidence that he actually owned or cared for them, Like
Speaker 3: no one the city owned Bummer.
Speaker 2: And last put them together.
Speaker 3: Yeah, but like you know, contemporary accounts about Bummer and
Speaker 3: Lazarus showed them as like more attached to the local
Speaker 3: bar scene, but they crossed paths frequently, and they all
Speaker 3: were in the same central name around Portsmouth Square and Montgomery.
Speaker 2: So they were all characters in the area.
Speaker 3: So yeah, and so this idea of them as a
Speaker 3: trio became like this popular legend, particularly after they died.
Speaker 3: So people at the time did think, like, you know,
Speaker 3: we see them together, but all these editorial cartoonists use
Speaker 3: them as as symbols of a bygone era after they
Speaker 3: were all gone. So, if you will indulge me, then
Speaker 3: I want to make this lore into cannon.
Speaker 2: Canon.
Speaker 3: So I want to say that the Emperor had a
Speaker 3: connection to street dogs. Yeah, so that said, Saren, close
Speaker 3: your eyes.
Speaker 2: Oh you're going to do it.
Speaker 3: I'm going to do it too. I want you to
Speaker 3: picture it. It's January twenty first, eighteen sixty seven. It's
Speaker 3: a typical gray day in San Francisco, the city that
Speaker 3: knows how it rained yesterday, but today is just heavily
Speaker 3: overcast and drizzling. That place where fog is toying with
Speaker 3: the idea of becoming rain. The sound of a fog
Speaker 3: horn pushes through the low, gray, flannel sky. You're standing
Speaker 3: on the corner of Montgomery and Washington in San Francisco.
Speaker 3: More than one hundred years later there would be a giant,
Speaker 3: pyramid capped skyscraper where you stand, taller than you could
Speaker 3: ever imagine. It's impressive today though, built in eighteen fifty three.
Speaker 3: Where you stand is the largest commercial building west of
Speaker 3: the Mississippi, four stories and home to studios and apartments
Speaker 3: for writers, including Mark Twain, Brett Hart and later Ambrose Bears,
Speaker 3: Robert Louis Stevenson, Jack London, George Sterling, Emma Goldman. Carriages
Speaker 3: roll by, their horses, huffing and snorting as they stroll
Speaker 3: toward Telegraph Hill. The footfall of passers by creek on
Speaker 3: the boards of the elevated wooden sidewalk. Some as they
Speaker 3: pass pat you on the head. See Zarin, You're a
Speaker 3: stray dog named punk. Everybody knows and loves you. Bummer
Speaker 3: and Lazarus under Who's rat catching Tutelid you trained passed
Speaker 3: on a few years ago. You uphold their tradition of
Speaker 3: vermin elimination, as well as companionship to the real leader
Speaker 3: of this great city, Emperor Norton. You stand today right
Speaker 3: next to him. He's a little worse for wear right now.
Speaker 3: Is current uniformist really threadbare? He stinks and his hands
Speaker 3: and face are dirty. They're smudged with ink. After an
Speaker 3: all night proclamation writing session, you sense a disturbance in
Speaker 3: the force. You look up and see a quote special
Speaker 3: officer approaching. His heavy steps match the dull look behind
Speaker 3: his eyes, armand barbier. You've had run ins with him
Speaker 3: before you let out a low, soft growl. Special officers
Speaker 3: aren't actual cops. They're auxiliary guys, basically goons hired by
Speaker 3: the fat cats and the business owners to watch over
Speaker 3: their stuff. Unlike the cops, he has no respect for
Speaker 3: the likes of you. He derives great pleasure from kicking
Speaker 3: a stray dog right in the ribs or stepping on
Speaker 3: the tail of a wayward cat. Basically, he's the worst.
Speaker 3: He reaches the corner where you and the Emperor stand.
Speaker 3: He holds out his trunch in a thickly lacquered billy
Speaker 3: club if ever there was one, and pokes it at
Speaker 3: the Emperor, smashing his carnation. Two lone pale pink flower
Speaker 3: petals detach and flutter to the ground, landing in the
Speaker 3: grimy gutter. Move along, there, you bum Barbier, says, you.
Speaker 3: Growl again. The rent a cop looks down at you
Speaker 3: and makes an attempt to kick you in the shanks
Speaker 3: with his blocky, muddy boot. You're too quick and screwed away,
Speaker 3: leaping to the other side of the Emperor. You won't
Speaker 3: abandon your friend in this moment. The Emperor clears his
Speaker 3: throat and announces to you that he is nort In,
Speaker 3: the first Emperor of these United States and Protector of Mexico.
Speaker 3: He doesn't appreciate being spoken to in such low terms, nor,
Speaker 3: he says, will he tolerate such man handling and rough attention.
Speaker 3: You move along now, or I'll charge you with vagrancy,
Speaker 3: you filthy hobo. Barbier grunts. The Emperor ignores the officer,
Speaker 3: regally turning away from him with a raised chin. Look here, you,
Speaker 3: the officer shouts, grabbing the Emperor by the elbow. A
Speaker 3: carriage pulls to a stop, and the driver, a wells
Speaker 3: fargo courier, looks down at the action. Everything all right here,
Speaker 3: he calls out, mind your own business, pal barks the officer.
Speaker 3: The courier pauses for a moment and then rolls on,
Speaker 3: looking back a few times. As he makes his way
Speaker 3: down the block. The foghorn sounds again. The officer begins
Speaker 3: to pull the Emperor down the street, ready to shove
Speaker 3: him down the block, when a crisp dollar bill falls
Speaker 3: from his imperial pocket. The officer freezes. He reaches into
Speaker 3: the Emperor's pockets and pulls out more bills, a good
Speaker 3: wat of cash. He looks at the emperor with confusion
Speaker 3: than irritation. Why you ain't no bum running around dressed
Speaker 3: like a tattered clown and carrying all this cash. You
Speaker 3: must be crazy. We can't have your types on these streets.
Speaker 3: Mister I hereby arrest you on the charge of lunacy.
Speaker 3: You're coming with me, And with that he begins to
Speaker 3: drag the silent but dignified Emperor Norton down the block
Speaker 3: toward the police. You look down the block and see
Speaker 3: that the courier has stopped again and is watching the
Speaker 3: scene from atop his buggy. You take off down the road,
Speaker 3: letting out sharp barks as you race at full speed.
Speaker 3: When you reach the carriage, you leap into the shotgun seat.
Speaker 3: You stare at the courier and he nods at you.
Speaker 3: Good boy. He says, let's go get help. We got
Speaker 3: to save the emperor. So Zarin, the Emperor was taken
Speaker 3: to the station, booked on a charge of lunacy really yeah,
Speaker 3: and scheduled to be approved by a judge for transfer
Speaker 3: to the state insane asylum in Stockton. Damn yeah. So
Speaker 3: the press gets win to this though, and there is
Speaker 3: absolute outrage, like people just lose it. The Bulletin wrote
Speaker 3: a scathing editorial quote, in what can only be described
Speaker 3: as the most dastardly of errors, Joshua A. Norton was
Speaker 3: arrested today. He's being held on the ludicrous charge of lunacy,
Speaker 3: known and loved by all true San Franciscans as Emperor Norton,
Speaker 3: this kindly monarch of Montgomery Street, is less a lunatic
Speaker 3: than those who have engineered these trumped up charges. As
Speaker 3: they will learn, his Majesty's loyal subjects are fully apprized
Speaker 3: of this outrage. Yeah, and then the Daily Alta chimes in, quote,
Speaker 3: Norton was in his day a respectable merchant, and since
Speaker 3: he has worn the Imperial purple, he has shed no blood,
Speaker 3: robbed nobody, and despoiled the country of no one, which
Speaker 3: is more than can be said of any of his
Speaker 3: fellows in that line. WHOA yeah, right. So the police chief,
Speaker 3: Patrick Crowley, he knew he was going to have a
Speaker 3: riot on his hands if they shipped Emperor Norton off
Speaker 3: to Stockton, So so he immediately releases Norton issues and apology.
Speaker 3: The Emperor, ever, the gentleman, announced in the papers an
Speaker 3: imperial pardon for armand Barbier, that special officer who busted him.
Speaker 3: He's a gentleman. And it was also from that day
Speaker 3: forward that police officers saluted the Emperor when he passed
Speaker 3: them on the street. We look bad the door, and
Speaker 3: that extends to today's historical reenactor. So it was on
Speaker 3: the cool, dreary, rainy evening of Thursday, January eighth, eighteen eighty,
Speaker 3: that the Emperor bid his city farewell. He was on
Speaker 3: his way to attend a regular monthly debate of the
Speaker 3: Hastings Society at the Academy of Natural Sciences. He was
Speaker 3: almost there, is just across the street, when he collapsed
Speaker 3: on the sidewalk and died. He was sixty one years old.
Speaker 3: So the next day, January ninth, the San Francisco Morning
Speaker 3: Call ran an obituary with the headline Imperial ashes quote
Speaker 3: on the reeking pavement, in the darkness of a moonless night,
Speaker 3: under the dripping rain, and surrounded by a hastily gathered
Speaker 3: crowd of wandering strangers, Norton the First, by the grace
Speaker 3: of God, Emperor of the United States and Protector of Mexico,
Speaker 3: departed this life. Other sovereigns have died with no more
Speaker 3: of kindly care. Other sovereigns have died as they have lived,
Speaker 3: with all the pomp of earthly majesty, but death having
Speaker 3: touched them. Norton the first rises up the exact peer
Speaker 3: of the haughtiest king or kaiser that ever wore a crown.
Speaker 3: Perhaps he will rise more than the peer of most
Speaker 3: of them. He had a better claim to kindly consideration
Speaker 3: than that his lot. Quote forbade to wade through slaughter
Speaker 3: to a throne and shut the gates of mercy on
Speaker 3: mankind through his harmless proclamations can always be traced an
Speaker 3: innate gentleness of heart, a desire to affect uses, and
Speaker 3: a courtesy, the possession of which would materially improve the
Speaker 3: powerful living princes whose names will naturally suggest themselves.
Speaker 2: I like the how respectful they were, and I got
Speaker 2: to the essence of his value to the city and
Speaker 2: to all of us in comparing him to the real.
Speaker 3: Leaders, that he could be an example totally. So. The
Speaker 3: Chronicle published coverage of his funeral with the headline leis
Speaker 3: more the king is dead. He died with six dogs
Speaker 3: and no personal effects to his name. The members of
Speaker 3: the Posh Pacific Club, they all chipped in to give
Speaker 3: him this regal sending off. Ten thousand people attended the
Speaker 3: funeral in wake Damn. The line to pay respects to
Speaker 3: the coffin snaked out the door and down the street.
Speaker 3: The cops had to come to manage the crowd, and
Speaker 3: the crowd was a cross section of the city, right,
Speaker 3: So there were the elites, the criminals, the clergy, the
Speaker 3: banker's maids, clerics, ladies who lunch, all ages, all origins,
Speaker 3: people of all ethnicities, all walks of.
Speaker 2: Life, all the true San Franciscos, true San.
Speaker 3: Francisco's, but also in the true San Francisco the majority
Speaker 3: of the mourners were everyday workers. Yes, the people who
Speaker 3: kept the city humming. They loved him and believed in him.
Speaker 3: So five years after his death, Mark Twain published Adventures
Speaker 3: of Huckleberry Finn. The character of the King is modeled
Speaker 3: after Emperor Norton. The Emperor also appears at as the.
Speaker 2: King in The Duke from Huckway Finn. Yes, totally.
Speaker 3: The Emperor also appears as himself in Robert Lewis Stevenson's
Speaker 3: novel The Wrecker. He's in there. In nineteen thirty four,
Speaker 3: San Francisco moved all the residents of its cemeteries except
Speaker 3: for the one of the Presidio to Colma of the
Speaker 3: city because they'd run out of room, and so the city,
Speaker 3: the city's only seven miles by seven months trained. Yeah,
Speaker 3: and so in that great cemetery eviction, Emperor Norton's remains
Speaker 3: were moved from the Masonic Cemetery to Woodlawn Cemetery in Colma,
Speaker 3: and they had like a whole reburial ceremony with full
Speaker 3: civic and military honors and a new headstone. Yeah. And
Speaker 3: there are those who visit the grave often, like as
Speaker 3: a pilgrimage. One of those groups friends of the show
Speaker 3: you mentioned him earlier, the Ancient and Honorable Order of
Speaker 3: e Calampus Vitis. They made an appearance in Our Drake's
Speaker 3: Plate episode Clampers. And so that is my ode to weirdness,
Speaker 3: my elegy for the fringe, my celebration of the flyers
Speaker 3: of the freak Flag. Thank you for indulging me. This
Speaker 3: was a humphort episode for me, very nice comfort escapist episode. Saren,
Speaker 3: what's your ridiculous takeaway?
Speaker 2: A couple of things I learned even though we take
Speaker 2: the tour, I still learned stuff in this episode, So
Speaker 2: thank you for doing research.
Speaker 3: The tour is great because it's focused mostly on San
Speaker 3: Francisco history, but you're like, he tells it through the
Speaker 3: eyes of the Emperor. It's I cannot recommend.
Speaker 2: I recommend it. You can find it online. Just look
Speaker 2: up the Emperor Norton's Tour Walking Tour.
Speaker 3: Yes, so good, so good.
Speaker 2: Also, I did have one though, that I think is
Speaker 2: interesting to the point you've made or the points you
Speaker 2: made throughout, which is possibly, in my opinion, one of
Speaker 2: the greatest Americans ever lived is somebody who named himself Emperor.
Speaker 3: And I like the I of that well, and he
Speaker 3: encapsules I know you and I have talked to about
Speaker 3: like what this notion of America or the United States is,
Speaker 3: and that I always classify it as you'r the Walt
Speaker 3: Whitman version of it. The witmen esque version of America
Speaker 3: is what I subscribe to. And like this vast possibility
Speaker 3: and vast capabilities and potentials, vast community and very inclusive,
Speaker 3: you know. And so that's what Norton locks into that
Speaker 3: of like here he's got this whitman esque version of
Speaker 3: our best selves and our most giving selves, and in
Speaker 3: taking a title. He's absolutely giving and shining a light.
Speaker 3: I mean, he's obviously he knows he's not going to
Speaker 3: dissolve Congress. But when you make those kind of statements
Speaker 3: that it shines a light for people. So and you know,
Speaker 3: my god, you gotta have fun exactly know.
Speaker 2: What I mean? Like, you gotta have fun in this life.
Speaker 3: One chance at it. So anyway, I like it, Dave,
Speaker 3: I need to talk back. That's my takeaway.
Speaker 2: I want.
Speaker 3: You knew do want about a school group because I've
Speaker 3: heard of it and you need to do one.
Speaker 4: Thank you so much for this podcast. I love it.
Speaker 2: It's our pleasure is That's what it's called. A skull
Speaker 2: group or just find a group about skulls.
Speaker 3: Skulls all right, we's like skull and bones.
Speaker 2: I'm gonna look up a skull group and start there.
Speaker 3: Let's do it. Okay, We're on it, dude. Uh that's
Speaker 3: it for today. You can find us online at ridiculous
Speaker 3: Crime dot com. We're also at Ridiculous Crime on Instagram,
Speaker 3: Blue Sky. We're on YouTube now Ridiculous Crime Pod with
Speaker 3: just the most adorable uh illustrations, animations, I should say
Speaker 3: or whatever. Both of them drawings Pictures Pictures Email us
Speaker 3: Ridiculous Crime at gmail dot com, leave it talk back
Speaker 3: on the iHeart app reach out. Ridiculous Crime is hosted
Speaker 3: by Elizabeth Dutton and Zaren Burnett, produced and edited by
Speaker 3: Dave Cousten, Emperor of BofA, starring Annalise Rutger as Judith.
Speaker 3: Research is by expert in uniform repair and hat plumage,
Speaker 3: refreshing Marissa Brown. The theme song is by Thomas Lee,
Speaker 3: protector of Mexican Food, and Travis Dutton, Protector of Mexican Spirits.
Speaker 3: Host wardrobe is provided by Botany five hundred. Guest hair
Speaker 3: and makeup by Sparkleshot and mister Andre. Executive producers are
Speaker 3: Pacific Club ad Hoc Funeral Fundraising Committee co chairs Ben
Speaker 3: Boleen and Noel Brown.
Speaker 2: Gigs Quime Say It One More Time, Geequius Crime.
Speaker 1: Ridiculous Crime is a production of iHeartRadio four more Podcasts
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