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Speaker 1: Ola. It is the end of Money March. You guys.

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Speaker 2: I'm so excited that you guys have joined us on

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Speaker 2: this journey with us, and we have an amazing guest

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Speaker 2: to end March and that is Tiffany the Budget Nista.

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Speaker 2: And on today's episode, we are going to be talking about.

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Speaker 3: The antidote of shame is voice.

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Speaker 2: Identifying a financial accountability partner in your tribe, how.

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Speaker 3: To talk finance in your relationship, whether that's your lover

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Speaker 3: in your life or your business partner.

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Speaker 2: Why you need four accounts.

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Speaker 3: Why it's okay to pay certain bills late, and how

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Speaker 3: you can get dealt collectors off your back.

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Speaker 2: And why the only way to make a change in

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Speaker 2: a community is through the woman. So I hope you

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Speaker 2: guys enjoy this episode. Make sure you follow the Budget Nista.

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Speaker 2: Make sure you join our Patreon because in April we

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Speaker 2: are going to be going on a money journey with

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Speaker 2: you guys. We're stepping up, We're holding ourselves accountable for

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Speaker 2: this last month and are going to be doing monthly

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Speaker 2: zooms with our community checking in on our financial health,

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Speaker 2: literacy wholeness. And make sure you go to patreon dot com, backslash,

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Speaker 2: Good Mom's Bad Choices. Enjoy Welcome back to Good Mom's

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Speaker 2: Bad Choices.

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Speaker 1: I'm Erica and I'm Mela and it's Wednesday, Happy Home Day.

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Speaker 2: We're so excited because this is the last episode of

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Speaker 2: Money March. It's been a wonderful March. I hope you

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Speaker 2: guys have been leveling.

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Speaker 1: The fuck up.

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Speaker 2: Take feeling wealthy, feeling wealthy, feeling rich, walking on money,

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Speaker 2: like Linda said, yeah, surrounded by money, just just money everywhere,

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Speaker 2: all over. Money flows abundantly to you. I hope you've been,

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Speaker 2: you know, repeating that the affirmations.

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Speaker 1: That we've been sharing weekly.

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Speaker 2: I hope that you've been signing up for all the

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Speaker 2: different courses where you can level up on your financial literacy.

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Speaker 2: It doesn't have to be scary. We don't need to

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Speaker 2: navigate in the space and fear anymore. We are not

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Speaker 2: doing that. We are done with those days, is eva.

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Speaker 2: And on that note, let's pull let's pull this tarot card.

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Speaker 3: Okay, doky, shuffle clean, all right.

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Speaker 4: And uh we have here these six pinnacles.

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Speaker 3: HM very interesting. The sixth pinnacles to appears appears to

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Speaker 3: be a man in a wealthy red coat. That's what

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Speaker 3: it's that wealthy you may be like You may be

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Speaker 3: like the wealthy man in this card, sharing your wealth

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Speaker 3: and abundance with others.

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Speaker 4: Oh yeah he is.

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Speaker 3: He's in a red robe handing out coins to two

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Speaker 3: beggars who kneel at his feet. In his hand, he

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Speaker 3: holds a balanced scale representing fairness and equality, and this

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Speaker 3: card reflects the state of financial security and generosity. You

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Speaker 3: can generously use your wealth and abundance for the benefit

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Speaker 3: of others, but it also speaks to receiving generosity and

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Speaker 3: the feeling of relief that accompanies much needed assistance. The

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Speaker 3: Six of Pinnacles is a card giving and receiving. Sometimes

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Speaker 3: you are not the giving end, other times you may

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Speaker 3: be the receiving in It's an ongoing cycle of life,

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Speaker 3: and this card serves as a reminder that the balance

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Speaker 3: can change at any time. Even if you're surrounded by wealth,

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Speaker 3: there will be times when you need help. When you

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Speaker 3: need help and support of others, so be generous with

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Speaker 3: your resources as you may need the support in the future.

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Speaker 3: You may be like this wealthy man in this card,

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Speaker 3: sharing your wealth and abundance with others. You have accumulated

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Speaker 3: great wealth and are now in a position to offer

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Speaker 3: financial assistance to those in need. You give generously through

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Speaker 3: charitable donations, tithing, or fundraising, and enjoy the good feelings

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Speaker 3: associated with helping others. Even if you are not financially wealthy.

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Speaker 3: You offer up your time, energy, love and support to

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Speaker 3: those who are in need, knowing it will be appreciated.

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Speaker 3: Giving of your time or wisdom is often just as

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Speaker 3: spiritually fulfilling as giving away money or gifts, and intangible

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Speaker 3: gift of your presence is received just as well. You

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Speaker 3: may also be inclined to make a loan to someone

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Speaker 3: on the premise that they will eventually pay you back

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Speaker 3: once they're back on their feet. This is alone built

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Speaker 3: on trust and good faith, knowing that you give something away,

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Speaker 3: it will come back to you.

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Speaker 2: I was gonna say that, I was going to say

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Speaker 2: that this feels like that, like.

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Speaker 1: What is the word of the cost cyclid.

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Speaker 2: What this feels like cyclicall, Like like what you give

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Speaker 2: you receive back, Like it's it's a it's a the

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Speaker 2: ecosystem that we talked about, Like it's You're not You're

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Speaker 2: not giving away money in fear because you have trust

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Speaker 2: with the people that you are sharing your wealth with

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Speaker 2: and hopefully you have our creating a space and a tribe,

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Speaker 2: a money tribe really of people that you you know,

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Speaker 2: that you can trust to give to and receive from

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Speaker 2: without shame, guilt, or you know, the possibility that motherfucker

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Speaker 2: might not pay.

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Speaker 3: You met symbiotic, symbiotic, symbiotic. This is so appropriate for

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Speaker 3: this episode and for the end of Money March because

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Speaker 3: it really says that think about how you can financially

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Speaker 3: support your family or friends in a way that encourages

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Speaker 3: them towards self sufficiency. So I feel like we have

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Speaker 3: tried to take power and finances ourselves, and as a result,

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Speaker 3: we're giving it to our community and help hoping that

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Speaker 3: you guys jump in and like give this gift to

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Speaker 3: your family and your friends. And we've had to reach

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Speaker 3: out to friends and ask them to help us start

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Speaker 3: this journey. And so shout out to our guests today

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Speaker 3: and for everyone this month who's you know really come

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Speaker 3: and helped us and help us help our community. And

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Speaker 3: it's what is the word again, symbiotic. It's symbiotic. And

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Speaker 3: I'm so grateful. So, okay we are our witch shit, Okay,

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Speaker 3: I don't know care nobody says I'll be going on

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Speaker 3: dates like I'm a witch and it's true, okay, because

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Speaker 3: I'm also I may not be a shuffler, but I

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Speaker 3: am a Tarot card reader through bitdtaro dot com.

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Speaker 2: Well, on that note, I'm so excited. I want to

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Speaker 2: introduce our guest. Our last guest of money March is

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Speaker 2: Tiffany the budget Nista, your favorite financial educator.

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Speaker 1: Welcome Tiffany, Hey, Meila, Hey Erica, thank you for having me.

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Speaker 3: Hey girl, Hey, thank you so much for coming on.

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Speaker 3: I'm so excited to get financially educated.

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Speaker 2: Me too, because I mean, I've been really honest this

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Speaker 2: month about my financial my finances, and like I I

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Speaker 2: don't in the past, I've had a lot of anxiety

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Speaker 2: around finance. I've had a lot of anxiety around budgeting.

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Speaker 2: I just don't want to I don't want to look

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Speaker 2: at my bank account, like I just want to ignore

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Speaker 2: it and act like it doesn't exist and like to

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Speaker 2: be surprised when I'm like, you know, not in the negative,

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Speaker 2: I'm like, Okay, well we're good, and I want.

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Speaker 1: To stop living in that space of anxiety. How are

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Speaker 1: going to be business.

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Speaker 3: Partners, bitch? I know, like, oh no, fuck, We're gonna not, well.

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Speaker 1: That's why we're here right now. Yes, I do.

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Speaker 3: I'm starting to feel way better every episode this month,

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Speaker 3: with every new person that's helping us. I took your

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Speaker 3: test today. That shit gave me anxiety. Even the questions.

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Speaker 5: I was like, oh, okay, okay, so so what level

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Speaker 5: of financial holeness have you currently achieved?

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Speaker 1: There's no judgment. Okay, well we both took it and

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Speaker 1: we're the same person. Okay.

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Speaker 5: That's sad that like it's a it's no, honestly, it's

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Speaker 5: a start that you that means that you have something

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Speaker 5: that you're working on as it relates to financial hollness,

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Speaker 5: but there is room for improvement. But quite honestly, there's

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Speaker 5: going to always be room for improvement, and financial hollness

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Speaker 5: is really kind of like a rolling aspiration because financial

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Speaker 5: hollness at twenty two not the same financial homeless as

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Speaker 5: thirty two.

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Speaker 1: It's not the same as forty two.

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Speaker 5: So even you even let's just say you said you

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Speaker 5: were one hundred percent, five years from now, you might

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Speaker 5: be at fifty percent because you know you've got you

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Speaker 5: know you're you're you've got another child, or you started

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Speaker 5: another business. So honestly, thirty percent means that you're in

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Speaker 5: the game even if you had zero percent. The fact

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Speaker 5: that you took it tells me tells me all that

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Speaker 5: I need to know that you are ready to go

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Speaker 5: to the next step.

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Speaker 1: We definitely are.

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Speaker 2: And if you guys are listening, to make sure you

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Speaker 2: go to the budget Nista dot com and take her

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Speaker 2: financial Holess quiz.

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Speaker 1: You can find out your score.

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Speaker 5: I want to I want know it said it said

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Speaker 5: get Good with Money dot Com. Like halfway down the page. Oh,

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Speaker 5: get good with Money dot Com. Sorry, Gecko with Money

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Speaker 5: dot Com.

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Speaker 1: Wait, I'm looking on your website right here, That's where

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Speaker 1: I took it.

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Speaker 5: Oh, it must be Honestly, my team could have put

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Speaker 5: it all over and this is possible.

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Speaker 1: They have it everywhere.

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Speaker 4: You gotta go.

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Speaker 2: You covered on every you every webye babe, must take test.

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Speaker 1: But I want to know, like, DM must your scores?

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Speaker 1: Don't you know me? Maybe you don't, like you don't have.

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Speaker 3: To post it's a screenshot and posted it.

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Speaker 1: I'm like, I'm not posting that.

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Speaker 3: Everybody knows my business that I'm over here.

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Speaker 1: See the gift of this was like, it's okay.

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Speaker 3: I was like, at least she said it's Okay, So

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Speaker 3: we usually.

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Speaker 2: Start our episodes off with an affirmation, and I would

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Speaker 2: love if you could share an affirmation to you know,

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Speaker 2: get us ready and get ready to confront.

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Speaker 1: Confront ourselves, confront ourselves. Yeah.

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Speaker 5: So my affirmation is that shame is a liar. Shame

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Speaker 5: will tell you that you are the mistake, not that

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Speaker 5: maybe you've made a mistake. And I want you to

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Speaker 5: remember that when it comes to shame, that it grows.

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Speaker 5: And when you're solitary and you're quiet and you keep

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Speaker 5: things to yourself, the only way to get rid of shame.

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Speaker 5: The only antidote to shame is voice. So shame is

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Speaker 5: a liar, and the antidote to shame is voice to

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Speaker 5: have to tell someone shame is.

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Speaker 2: A liar, And the antidote to shame is a voice.

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Speaker 1: You know what.

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Speaker 2: I wholeheartedly feel that and receive that, and in so

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Speaker 2: many ways, not even in just finance, I think because

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Speaker 2: you know, me and Mila started this podcast, and you know,

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Speaker 2: there's so much shame involved in womanhood and motherhood and

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Speaker 2: using our voices has really like taken away so much

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Speaker 2: shame in my life.

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Speaker 3: It really has.

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Speaker 2: And to be able to apply that to also my finances.

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Speaker 3: I didn't I didn't even think about that, right, I

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Speaker 3: didn't even consider how I do feel shamed in my finances.

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Speaker 3: And it's something I would never discuss, and it's something

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Speaker 3: I always avoid in conversations and like if you don't,

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Speaker 3: don't use your voice and just like about that why

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Speaker 3: we're talking about.

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Speaker 5: Like honestly, shame is like, yes, look at her quiet,

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Speaker 5: Shame is getting down and make the stallion.

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Speaker 2: He's like, but but.

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Speaker 1: Here's the thing.

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Speaker 5: So using your voice, this means that you want to

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Speaker 5: find a So for me, it's my best friend Linda.

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Speaker 5: Like when I went through I went through so much

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Speaker 5: with my finances in two thousand and eight, during the recession,

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Speaker 5: I lost my job. I went through a scam that

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Speaker 5: left me thirty five thousand dollars in credit card dead. Yeah,

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Speaker 5: I mean it was. I was a shame because I

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Speaker 5: was just turning. I was like in two thousand nineties

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Speaker 5: when I lost my job, I was just turning thirty,

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Speaker 5: and I just remember being like, yo, I have to

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Speaker 5: move back home to my parents' house. In my middle

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Speaker 5: school bed sized medium a small medium for those uninitiated, right,

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Speaker 5: So I remember feeling so much shame that I was

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Speaker 5: not calling my friends, I was not hanging out. I

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Speaker 5: wasn't anything like my support system because I didn't want

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Speaker 5: to admit that I felt like a shame told me

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Speaker 5: that I'm a mistake, not that I made a mistake,

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Speaker 5: but I didn't want to tell anyone. And you know,

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Speaker 5: but you know, when you got a bestie, she's like,

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Speaker 5: I wish you would stay quiet for weeks. You tried it,

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Speaker 5: So Linda was like calling Calin, calling, coming by the house, calling, calling,

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Speaker 5: So finally I, you know, I picked up and she's like,

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Speaker 5: how are you? You know, try to fake the fuck,

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Speaker 5: you know, and she was like girl, And then I

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Speaker 5: just started boohoo crying, and I told her everything hadn't

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Speaker 5: lost everything. I'd lost my my job, my condo, how

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Speaker 5: much I owed all this money in student loan debt

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Speaker 5: and credit card debt, and I didn't know how I

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Speaker 5: was going to manage.

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Speaker 1: And she was like, is that it? That wasn't She

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Speaker 1: was my safe face because she was like, girl, we're

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Speaker 1: all broke. Take a look around.

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Speaker 5: Like she was like, honestly, Tiffany, we're just turning thirty soon, right,

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Speaker 5: Everyone's been broken their twenties, but.

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Speaker 2: You late to the Marty Welcome, Welcome to the place.

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Speaker 5: How I'm laughing now is how I was laughing because

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Speaker 5: you see what she did because I was so ashamed

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Speaker 5: because I was like keeping it to myself. Remember I

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Speaker 5: told you, Shame loves it when you keep it to yourself.

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Speaker 5: Shame loves it when you don't use your voice. Shame

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Speaker 5: loves it when you're quiet about what you're fearful of.

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Speaker 5: Because Shame had told me, it's just.

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Speaker 1: You, girl, You're the only one. Look at you.

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Speaker 2: I mean, do you think that maybe you have started

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Speaker 2: to identify yourself too as like the friend that had

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Speaker 2: it atten together?

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Speaker 1: Right? And of course so.

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Speaker 2: Like yeah, you're like I missed that party. I didn't

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Speaker 2: do that for y'all. I don't know about that, but

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Speaker 2: you know, and then suddenly you're like having to face Okay,

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Speaker 2: I'm I'm not the exception.

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Speaker 4: To the role. You know.

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Speaker 5: Yes, it humbled me, which I needed honestly because I

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Speaker 5: was kind of feeling myself. But also it reminded me

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Speaker 5: that like everybody makes mistakes, it's part of it. Michael

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Speaker 5: Jordan doesn't score well, he didn't score every single night.

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Speaker 5: Lebron doesn't win every single night, like this is part.

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Speaker 5: This is human like, I'm not. It's not something to

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Speaker 5: be ashamed of. I was literally going through a human

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Speaker 5: like experience where sometimes mistakes are made and you learn

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Speaker 5: from them and you grow. And so I'm way easier

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Speaker 5: on myself. I give myself the space and the grace

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Speaker 5: to grow, but also to what it let me allow

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Speaker 5: me to be is to me what I was created

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Speaker 5: to be. I was created to But a really good

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Speaker 5: teacher is an even better student. So I had to

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Speaker 5: go through so many, so much of what I went

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Speaker 5: through in order for me to become an amazing student

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Speaker 5: and the amazing teacher. And that's why I started the Buddeanista.

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Speaker 5: That's why I wrote Get Good with Money. You know,

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Speaker 5: I started this whole movement because I knew what it

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Speaker 5: felt like. I learned from it, and I took all

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Speaker 5: of that knowledge and how it felt, because women especially

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Speaker 5: need that like, all that knowledge and how it felt

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Speaker 5: and that mindset shift, and then I poured into into

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Speaker 5: into the women that I serve.

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Speaker 1: That's amazing.

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Speaker 2: I mean I think a lot of times too, just

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Speaker 2: based on the patriarchy, you know, like we haven't always

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Speaker 2: women haven't always have not felt empowered to you know,

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Speaker 2: be like to be to understand their finances, to get

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Speaker 2: in front of them. They've we've often allowed the man

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Speaker 2: to kind of control, like, okay, y'all handle it. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: I'll handle this. But obviously times have shifted, things have

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Speaker 2: been changing. There's so many empowered women, and like, I

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Speaker 2: think the pandemic really also, so it's shine a light

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Speaker 2: on how important it is to know what the fuck is.

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Speaker 4: Going on over there?

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Speaker 1: What are we doing?

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Speaker 4: What are we spending money on?

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Speaker 1: Wait? How much am I paying? I didn't even know

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Speaker 1: I was.

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Speaker 2: I didn't even know that I was paying the subscription

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Speaker 2: for the last you know, two years, ten dollars out

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Speaker 2: of my account. I mean it's small, but like little

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Speaker 2: things like that that kind of add up. You don't

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Speaker 2: look at your bank statement. I know for me, like

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Speaker 2: I don't look at my bank statement monthly. It gives

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Speaker 2: me anxiety. But whenever I have, I.

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Speaker 3: For sure every time you find some shit charges.

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Speaker 1: I'm like, what the fuck is this?

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Speaker 3: Yeah, but then God forbid you call the banks. I've

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Speaker 3: literally sat. The last time I attempted to be responsible,

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Speaker 3: I called and I was on the hold for like

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Speaker 3: ninety minutes. I was like, this is this is what

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Speaker 3: they do.

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Speaker 1: I can't even growing and building and growing.

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Speaker 5: I was like, that's why one of the things that

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Speaker 5: one of my one of my so I have ten

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Speaker 5: steps to financial wholeness, and one of my steps to

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Speaker 5: financial wholeness is it's.

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Speaker 1: Step number nine, which is your money team.

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Speaker 4: Right.

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Speaker 1: But the thing is your money team is.

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Speaker 5: Not just like potentially like an accountant, maybe like a

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Speaker 5: financial advisor.

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Speaker 1: It's also an accountability partner.

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Speaker 5: Because I believe that women especially work best in community.

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Speaker 1: Right, we all know the tribe over here. Literally.

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Speaker 5: I remember when things were really really scary for me,

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Speaker 5: like you know, when I'd lost my job and everything,

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Speaker 5: I used to have Linda come over and all the

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Speaker 5: envelopes that were pink and red, which means.

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Speaker 1: Gird you owe us, Right.

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Speaker 5: I was like, Linda, Linda, open it, open it. She'd

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Speaker 5: be like, oh, this was not that bad girl. It

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Speaker 5: says it's two hundred dollars girl. Okay, next one.

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Speaker 1: Okay, you know we all made it.

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Speaker 5: So but having her be the intermediary, because I was like,

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Speaker 5: those envelopes would have sat forever.

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Speaker 1: Never are you an accountability partner? Who's gonna be my Linda?

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Speaker 3: I know me, you can't you, well, we can. We

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Speaker 3: can just open each other's mail because I avoid mail too.

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Speaker 1: Like I need someone.

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Speaker 2: Who's getting like sixty percent on the financial holeness test

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Speaker 2: to be my linen.

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Speaker 3: Okay, well know how, I don't.

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Speaker 1: Know best accountability partner.

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Speaker 5: It's just someone who is working on their finances as well.

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Speaker 5: Financial so I want to do better and I'm going

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Speaker 5: to provide a safe, non judgmental space for you.

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Speaker 1: That's it.

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Speaker 5: They don't have to be some perfect It's actually better

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Speaker 5: that they're not financially perfect because you guys are supposed

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Speaker 5: to be growing together because you're holding them accountable and

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Speaker 5: they're holding you accountable. Just a safe space for you

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Speaker 5: to work through your financial holeness plan.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean even even with my friends who I

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Speaker 3: know are financially off better than me, Like these are

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Speaker 3: quite These are definite thing. Definitely conversations I avoid and

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Speaker 3: definitely like when I am going or have gone through things,

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Speaker 3: I'm like, I'm not talking to these bitches because they

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Speaker 3: look at it, you know, and never mind and just

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Speaker 3: like really like harboring on it alone and in shame,

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Speaker 3: you know, like sweating profusely and like really scared as

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Speaker 3: an adult and that is scary, and even you having

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Speaker 3: this conversation as a woman, like I remember, first of all,

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Speaker 3: the conversation didn't come up a lot in my household.

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Speaker 3: I remember like certain conversations when like shit went bad,

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Speaker 3: like my dad lost his job. I'm like, you're going

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Speaker 3: to be poor. And I remember even being like in

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Speaker 3: high school thinking I don't have time for this. I

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Speaker 3: can't wait to find a rich husband and make the dinner.

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Speaker 3: That was what I was like, I'm gonna be great

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Speaker 3: at cleaning the house and making the dinner. I just

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Speaker 3: want someone to take care of me. And as like

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Speaker 3: now life is knocked at my door and I'm a

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Speaker 3: single ass mom, and it's like, bitch, no one's gonna

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Speaker 3: take care of you.

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Speaker 1: You gotta take care of somebody else.

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Speaker 2: And honestly, I can't even imagine you living that life.

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Speaker 3: Honestly, I was adamant about it when I was fourteen.

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Speaker 1: I was like, fuck all that.

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Speaker 5: So but I'll say this, like, let's just say even

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Speaker 5: if because this happens, right, Let's just say you found

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Speaker 5: of a husband. He's like a neurosurgeon and he's amazing,

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Speaker 5: and then he goes outside and gets hit by a

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Speaker 5: car boom. You know, not that he cheat, not that

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Speaker 5: he leaves. But I'm just saying that, like women, even

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Speaker 5: if you are you know that you have someone who

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Speaker 5: does take care of you. And there's nothing wrong with that.

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Speaker 5: I always but there's no judgment however you navigate money.

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Speaker 5: But it's still so important for women to know how

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Speaker 5: to navigate because like what if, like, for example, my husband,

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Speaker 5: I want to say, like a year into us dating,

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Speaker 5: he had an aneurysm hm. And like so for those

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Speaker 5: those who don't know, aneurysm is like when like a

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Speaker 5: vein in your brain. So think about like you know,

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Speaker 5: when you blow a balloon and sometimes there's a little

401
00:19:09,359 --> 00:19:11,080
Speaker 5: soft spot so it like pokes out a little bit

402
00:19:11,080 --> 00:19:12,919
Speaker 5: more and if you keep blowing it, that's just the

403
00:19:12,960 --> 00:19:14,640
Speaker 5: part with that pops in the balloon first, and that's

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Speaker 5: why the balloon pops.

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Speaker 1: So you're you're, you're, you're. Your vein is.

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Speaker 5: Similar to that, and there's a soft spot in the

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Speaker 5: vein so as blood is rushing through you know, if

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Speaker 5: if the blood if they're like maybe the flow of

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Speaker 5: blood is too great, it can pop that part of

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Speaker 5: your vein and then live you're bleeding in your brain

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Speaker 5: and most people don't survive it. So they found his

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Speaker 5: aneurysm early because he tripped and he fall and hit

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Speaker 5: his head and they were like, wait, your head's fine,

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Speaker 5: but bruh because aneurysms are silent killers.

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Speaker 1: You have an aneurysm. I know few people that have

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Speaker 1: died like in the yes, same, just yes, yeah, so exactly.

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Speaker 5: So it's like, so thankfully his didn't burse, that's not

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Speaker 5: how they found it, but during that time, like what if?

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Speaker 5: And I actually was like I so at first because

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Speaker 5: we've moved in together and he was paying all the bills,

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Speaker 5: and then all of a sudden he couldn't work for

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Speaker 5: like six months, and so it really fell on me.

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Speaker 1: So I didn't know this, but like yo, when.

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Speaker 5: You file for like disability, all this stuff, some of

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00:20:08,640 --> 00:20:10,520
Speaker 5: that stuff didn't literally count. The money didn't come in

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Speaker 5: until he was actually back to work. So it was like,

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Speaker 5: even like, he's this great boyfriend. He used to pay

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Speaker 5: all the bills. He was amazing, you know, as I

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Speaker 5: was building the Budgetnista. But now all of a sudden

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Speaker 5: it fell on me because not because he was cheating

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Speaker 5: or whatever or he left me, but because of this

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Speaker 5: random like aneurism, and so I just always mind women

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Speaker 5: no matter what stage you're in, no matter whether you are,

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Speaker 5: you know, a lady who lunches or a lady who

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00:20:35,640 --> 00:20:40,520
Speaker 5: makes lunch either way, right right, either way, you got

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Speaker 5: to be about to business and your money because.

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Speaker 1: You just never know.

438
00:20:44,760 --> 00:20:46,440
Speaker 2: And so that brings me to kind of what I

439
00:20:46,480 --> 00:20:49,119
Speaker 2: want to, you know, get into today and talking about

440
00:20:49,640 --> 00:20:53,320
Speaker 2: you know, how as parents can we budget better?

441
00:20:53,400 --> 00:20:55,320
Speaker 1: And you know, some of us are single parents, some

442
00:20:55,480 --> 00:20:57,720
Speaker 1: of us, some of us are married. And you know,

443
00:20:57,840 --> 00:20:58,480
Speaker 1: I was reading on.

444
00:20:58,520 --> 00:21:02,440
Speaker 2: Your Instagram like having that conversation, like having that having

445
00:21:02,480 --> 00:21:04,800
Speaker 2: that conversation with yourself about what your budget is, like

446
00:21:05,000 --> 00:21:08,480
Speaker 2: actually looking at your finances. But then also like having

447
00:21:08,520 --> 00:21:11,480
Speaker 2: that conversation with your partner, Like how do you have

448
00:21:11,640 --> 00:21:14,679
Speaker 2: a conversation with your partner, Like if you're just starting day,

449
00:21:14,800 --> 00:21:17,000
Speaker 2: you just moved in with your your boyfriend, or maybe

450
00:21:17,040 --> 00:21:19,720
Speaker 2: you just got married, and like you didn't have the

451
00:21:19,800 --> 00:21:21,960
Speaker 2: conversation because you've been avoiding it, but you know it

452
00:21:22,040 --> 00:21:23,080
Speaker 2: needs to be had.

453
00:21:23,119 --> 00:21:24,720
Speaker 3: Like when do you have it? Like if you've dated

454
00:21:24,760 --> 00:21:26,480
Speaker 3: someone four years and when you're about to move in,

455
00:21:26,600 --> 00:21:28,119
Speaker 3: do you have it or do you figure that shit out?

456
00:21:28,119 --> 00:21:29,520
Speaker 3: Before you move in, because you want to know what

457
00:21:29,600 --> 00:21:32,159
Speaker 3: you're moving in with. I remember being in college, or

458
00:21:32,240 --> 00:21:34,640
Speaker 3: like maybe a little after college, and I was dating

459
00:21:34,720 --> 00:21:36,520
Speaker 3: this girl who was like much older than me. She

460
00:21:36,560 --> 00:21:37,960
Speaker 3: had owned a house, she had a good job, she

461
00:21:37,960 --> 00:21:39,960
Speaker 3: worked at the University of Phoenix, and she was like,

462
00:21:40,000 --> 00:21:41,720
Speaker 3: how's your credit And I was like, what the fuck

463
00:21:41,800 --> 00:21:43,280
Speaker 3: kind of a conversation?

464
00:21:44,200 --> 00:21:45,320
Speaker 1: Are you sure her name wasn't Budge?

465
00:21:45,320 --> 00:21:46,800
Speaker 5: And he said because I literally asked my husband that

466
00:21:46,920 --> 00:21:48,280
Speaker 5: like week one to date and now I was like, oh,

467
00:21:48,320 --> 00:21:50,320
Speaker 5: this is cute on your credit score.

468
00:21:51,200 --> 00:21:54,440
Speaker 3: I was like, what the hell? And I was offended.

469
00:21:55,840 --> 00:21:58,560
Speaker 1: Because this was low to He was like, I don't know.

470
00:21:59,000 --> 00:22:00,760
Speaker 1: I was like, well, it sess that me knows you

471
00:22:00,800 --> 00:22:03,800
Speaker 1: want to take a look. Not so I wonder is

472
00:22:03,800 --> 00:22:05,200
Speaker 1: your social data first?

473
00:22:06,440 --> 00:22:06,720
Speaker 4: Okay?

474
00:22:06,960 --> 00:22:10,520
Speaker 5: So I say that if you're dating for fun, you know,

475
00:22:10,600 --> 00:22:11,800
Speaker 5: you guys, you know like this person, you know, not

476
00:22:11,800 --> 00:22:12,399
Speaker 5: how long time you date.

477
00:22:12,440 --> 00:22:13,720
Speaker 1: You're like, oh, I like this person's fun.

478
00:22:14,080 --> 00:22:16,360
Speaker 5: But if you really think to yourself, this is going

479
00:22:16,440 --> 00:22:18,240
Speaker 5: to be a more serious partnership, whether it doesn't have

480
00:22:18,280 --> 00:22:21,000
Speaker 5: to marriage, it just means like a more serious partnership,

481
00:22:21,440 --> 00:22:23,959
Speaker 5: then that's when you should start having the financial questions

482
00:22:24,000 --> 00:22:26,640
Speaker 5: because it's likely that their finances are going to affect yours,

483
00:22:26,920 --> 00:22:28,480
Speaker 5: you know, and so even if you're got to do

484
00:22:28,520 --> 00:22:31,720
Speaker 5: the Oprah Stedman thing, you know, you know. So So

485
00:22:31,880 --> 00:22:34,080
Speaker 5: for me, I knew because by the time I started

486
00:22:34,160 --> 00:22:35,960
Speaker 5: dating my husband, I was thirty four. We had dated

487
00:22:36,160 --> 00:22:39,000
Speaker 5: briefly in our twenties, but then I was like, I mean,

488
00:22:39,080 --> 00:22:39,880
Speaker 5: the streets.

489
00:22:39,600 --> 00:22:42,480
Speaker 1: Need me, so I need to be out there needs

490
00:22:44,320 --> 00:22:49,640
Speaker 1: right because you know, you're twenty. I was like, oh,

491
00:22:49,960 --> 00:22:51,120
Speaker 1: I'm like a colleague.

492
00:22:51,720 --> 00:22:54,720
Speaker 5: Yes. So then by the time we met again in

493
00:22:54,840 --> 00:22:57,080
Speaker 5: my mid thirties, I was ready to settle down, and

494
00:22:57,720 --> 00:22:59,600
Speaker 5: so I knew that. So that's why I asked him

495
00:22:59,600 --> 00:23:02,200
Speaker 5: about his credit score, because honestly, by then I kind

496
00:23:02,200 --> 00:23:03,720
Speaker 5: of had made this list about like what I wanted

497
00:23:03,760 --> 00:23:05,439
Speaker 5: a man, and I remember he was such an awesome

498
00:23:05,880 --> 00:23:08,480
Speaker 5: like boyfriend then, and so when we started dating again,

499
00:23:08,520 --> 00:23:09,399
Speaker 5: I was like, oh, wow, he's.

500
00:23:09,240 --> 00:23:10,080
Speaker 1: Still really awesome.

501
00:23:10,560 --> 00:23:12,080
Speaker 5: You know, even if we don't get married, this is

502
00:23:12,160 --> 00:23:14,000
Speaker 5: I want us to be a serious relationship. And so

503
00:23:14,160 --> 00:23:16,480
Speaker 5: I asked him right away. So once you know that,

504
00:23:16,920 --> 00:23:19,000
Speaker 5: you can start asking white things, you know, Like I mean,

505
00:23:19,040 --> 00:23:21,840
Speaker 5: I asked about credit but you don't have to a

506
00:23:21,920 --> 00:23:25,600
Speaker 5: great way to introduce financial conversation into your relationship is

507
00:23:25,680 --> 00:23:28,040
Speaker 5: to introduce it around a goal. So one of the

508
00:23:28,080 --> 00:23:29,680
Speaker 5: first things, like you know, the credit thing was like

509
00:23:29,720 --> 00:23:31,680
Speaker 5: a lot. But after that, like he saw that I

510
00:23:31,800 --> 00:23:33,760
Speaker 5: like to travel, and I remember he was like, yoh,

511
00:23:33,800 --> 00:23:35,919
Speaker 5: we should go on a vacation, and I said, okay,

512
00:23:36,280 --> 00:23:39,000
Speaker 5: let's start saving together. Not in the same account, but

513
00:23:39,200 --> 00:23:40,840
Speaker 5: like let's start like you know, like a saving plan,

514
00:23:40,960 --> 00:23:44,520
Speaker 5: like you open up a specific savings account just for trips,

515
00:23:44,560 --> 00:23:46,600
Speaker 5: and then I have my trip account and then like

516
00:23:46,680 --> 00:23:49,280
Speaker 5: you know, every payper, we check on our accounts together.

517
00:23:49,680 --> 00:23:52,080
Speaker 5: And so that's a great way to start that conversation

518
00:23:52,160 --> 00:23:54,920
Speaker 5: because it's not stressful. We're talking about VACA here, you know.

519
00:23:55,400 --> 00:23:58,080
Speaker 5: But you get a gauge on how they navigate because

520
00:23:58,160 --> 00:24:00,680
Speaker 5: if every two weeks when you're checking, your account is

521
00:24:00,720 --> 00:24:03,200
Speaker 5: growing and there's is and now you're like, okay, maybe

522
00:24:03,240 --> 00:24:05,240
Speaker 5: this is someone who's not a saver, and that's okay

523
00:24:05,640 --> 00:24:06,560
Speaker 5: because my husband was not.

524
00:24:06,640 --> 00:24:08,879
Speaker 1: I was like bruh, how many times you.

525
00:24:10,359 --> 00:24:10,399
Speaker 6: Know?

526
00:24:11,080 --> 00:24:14,040
Speaker 5: So I realized that for him, I said, okay, he's

527
00:24:14,080 --> 00:24:16,600
Speaker 5: not a natural saver. But I got a trick. I

528
00:24:16,720 --> 00:24:19,880
Speaker 5: was like babe, go to HR and tell them put

529
00:24:19,960 --> 00:24:22,320
Speaker 5: some of your money in your regular checking and some

530
00:24:22,520 --> 00:24:24,960
Speaker 5: of your money and your trip savings account. And so

531
00:24:25,040 --> 00:24:26,560
Speaker 5: when they started doing that, so you see what I mean.

532
00:24:26,640 --> 00:24:28,359
Speaker 5: It wasn't for me to judge. I wasn't looking for

533
00:24:28,440 --> 00:24:30,920
Speaker 5: someone who's financially perfect. But let's just say I said

534
00:24:30,960 --> 00:24:32,959
Speaker 5: to do that, and we talked about it, and then

535
00:24:33,000 --> 00:24:35,280
Speaker 5: he didn't, and then it was just this build up

536
00:24:35,320 --> 00:24:38,400
Speaker 5: of other activity like that that wasn't conducive.

537
00:24:38,040 --> 00:24:40,320
Speaker 1: To being strong financially. Then I might worry.

538
00:24:40,560 --> 00:24:43,119
Speaker 5: But once he did that, he started saving, you know,

539
00:24:43,560 --> 00:24:45,879
Speaker 5: and then we talked about credit after that. And so,

540
00:24:46,240 --> 00:24:49,080
Speaker 5: like I said, opening the gates with something that both

541
00:24:49,160 --> 00:24:51,840
Speaker 5: of you guys find amiable that you're not gonna no

542
00:24:51,920 --> 00:24:54,879
Speaker 5: one argues over having an amazing vacation. Of course, we

543
00:24:55,000 --> 00:24:58,520
Speaker 5: want to so make that your first goal collectively together,

544
00:24:58,640 --> 00:24:59,960
Speaker 5: and then that way you can see how that person

545
00:25:00,160 --> 00:25:01,920
Speaker 5: navigates with their money and then go from there.

546
00:25:02,440 --> 00:25:04,920
Speaker 2: I think that's such great advice that I wish I

547
00:25:04,960 --> 00:25:06,040
Speaker 2: would have had ten years.

548
00:25:06,200 --> 00:25:07,879
Speaker 3: I also feel like it's I feel like it's a

549
00:25:07,960 --> 00:25:11,240
Speaker 3: form of foreplay, because you know, like it's such just

550
00:25:11,320 --> 00:25:13,600
Speaker 3: something that I have such anxiety over because I'm not

551
00:25:14,240 --> 00:25:17,800
Speaker 3: doing it alone. But I realized, like even in our partnership,

552
00:25:17,840 --> 00:25:20,920
Speaker 3: obviously we're just we're best friends and we're business partners,

553
00:25:21,000 --> 00:25:23,640
Speaker 3: but like when me and Erica start to see progress

554
00:25:23,720 --> 00:25:25,920
Speaker 3: in our business and like progress and like, we have

555
00:25:25,960 --> 00:25:27,480
Speaker 3: a money we have an account together, as the first

556
00:25:27,480 --> 00:25:28,840
Speaker 3: person I've ever had an account with same.

557
00:25:28,880 --> 00:25:30,560
Speaker 2: I've never even had an account with a boyfriend.

558
00:25:30,640 --> 00:25:32,800
Speaker 3: Yeah, so we're like, this is my boyfriend. We share

559
00:25:32,800 --> 00:25:36,399
Speaker 3: an account, Like should we use the card babe for

560
00:25:36,520 --> 00:25:39,720
Speaker 3: taking the kids on vacation together. I love but in

561
00:25:39,880 --> 00:25:43,760
Speaker 3: this weird, like non sexual way, it makes my pussy

562
00:25:43,840 --> 00:25:48,400
Speaker 3: way because I'm like, yeah, baby, get this fucking money.

563
00:25:48,600 --> 00:25:48,760
Speaker 5: You know.

564
00:25:48,880 --> 00:25:50,920
Speaker 3: I hit goals together. And I feel like when you

565
00:25:51,000 --> 00:25:54,320
Speaker 3: can do that with any type of partner, especially in

566
00:25:54,400 --> 00:25:56,880
Speaker 3: a marriage or in a partnership, it kind of makes

567
00:25:56,920 --> 00:25:58,560
Speaker 3: you see Like it makes you see that you can

568
00:25:58,760 --> 00:26:01,000
Speaker 3: you can check off goals together, you can get to

569
00:26:01,080 --> 00:26:03,720
Speaker 3: places together, and you can have a nice vacation. You

570
00:26:03,760 --> 00:26:05,680
Speaker 3: could do that thing. And it's just like, once you

571
00:26:05,800 --> 00:26:09,639
Speaker 3: overcome that part of the shame, we need to do that.

572
00:26:09,680 --> 00:26:11,600
Speaker 1: We need a vacation fund for the kids, we do.

573
00:26:11,800 --> 00:26:14,080
Speaker 5: I love that I love that you guys do that

574
00:26:14,200 --> 00:26:17,680
Speaker 5: together because to your point, Mila, to your point that

575
00:26:17,920 --> 00:26:20,239
Speaker 5: like what you're really doing is you're exercising that part

576
00:26:20,280 --> 00:26:22,280
Speaker 5: of your financial brain. Because if you could do that

577
00:26:22,320 --> 00:26:24,280
Speaker 5: with Erica, then it's like, oh I could do that

578
00:26:24,400 --> 00:26:26,320
Speaker 5: with this person, and then maybe I do that with it.

579
00:26:26,680 --> 00:26:26,840
Speaker 6: You know.

580
00:26:27,040 --> 00:26:28,800
Speaker 5: So remember I said before you were like, you gave

581
00:26:28,800 --> 00:26:30,680
Speaker 5: me my accountaility the party with your thirty percent.

582
00:26:31,040 --> 00:26:34,159
Speaker 1: No, she's not perfect accountability. I have already found your

583
00:26:34,680 --> 00:26:35,560
Speaker 1: you already found your.

584
00:26:35,480 --> 00:26:37,600
Speaker 5: Safe space, and you guys are actually doing like kind

585
00:26:37,640 --> 00:26:40,639
Speaker 5: of like these extended activities together. It's a perfect place

586
00:26:40,880 --> 00:26:44,320
Speaker 5: to practice being financially whole together, so that way it

587
00:26:44,440 --> 00:26:46,560
Speaker 5: radiates out because one thing we've learned I'm sure you've

588
00:26:46,640 --> 00:26:47,840
Speaker 5: learned as an adult is.

589
00:26:47,920 --> 00:26:49,400
Speaker 1: How you show up one way is how you show

590
00:26:49,480 --> 00:26:50,160
Speaker 1: up other ways.

591
00:26:50,840 --> 00:26:53,320
Speaker 5: So if you can show up financially responsible with Erica

592
00:26:53,359 --> 00:26:55,320
Speaker 5: and get better and better, then you will be able

593
00:26:55,320 --> 00:26:58,720
Speaker 5: to show more financially responsible in your own life and

594
00:26:58,800 --> 00:26:59,840
Speaker 5: then your extended life.

595
00:27:00,600 --> 00:27:02,840
Speaker 2: And I love the tip of HR because I think

596
00:27:02,880 --> 00:27:05,080
Speaker 2: a lot of people don't know that you can do that.

597
00:27:05,400 --> 00:27:09,320
Speaker 2: You know that you can utilize your the HR department

598
00:27:09,640 --> 00:27:12,480
Speaker 2: of wherever you're working, and they can allocate your money

599
00:27:12,600 --> 00:27:12,840
Speaker 2: for you.

600
00:27:13,000 --> 00:27:14,800
Speaker 1: So you I called the budget.

601
00:27:14,440 --> 00:27:16,840
Speaker 5: Without the budget, so I told him because like so

602
00:27:17,000 --> 00:27:19,160
Speaker 5: like inside the book, get it with money. Literally there's

603
00:27:19,160 --> 00:27:21,359
Speaker 5: a section that says how to budget without budgeting and

604
00:27:21,440 --> 00:27:23,080
Speaker 5: so like, so I'll give you the tea what I said.

605
00:27:23,119 --> 00:27:26,000
Speaker 5: I'm like, you need four accounts to checking too, savings.

606
00:27:26,400 --> 00:27:29,720
Speaker 5: So checking number one is for your spending. This is

607
00:27:29,760 --> 00:27:32,800
Speaker 5: where you attach your debit card so you can swipe

608
00:27:32,880 --> 00:27:36,480
Speaker 5: like swiping nose swiping right. Checking account number two is.

609
00:27:36,520 --> 00:27:37,360
Speaker 1: For your bills.

610
00:27:37,760 --> 00:27:40,359
Speaker 5: Having a separate checking account, especially for parents, is going

611
00:27:40,440 --> 00:27:42,920
Speaker 5: to be critical. So you want to because you want

612
00:27:43,160 --> 00:27:46,000
Speaker 5: your bill's account to not have a debit card because

613
00:27:46,000 --> 00:27:47,480
Speaker 5: when you know when you're swiping, you want to know,

614
00:27:47,680 --> 00:27:50,200
Speaker 5: I know I did not spend the kids juice box money,

615
00:27:50,400 --> 00:27:51,480
Speaker 5: you know, right?

616
00:27:51,560 --> 00:27:54,800
Speaker 1: And then savings account number one is for emergency savings.

617
00:27:55,160 --> 00:27:57,639
Speaker 5: So you want to have anywhere from three months, six

618
00:27:57,720 --> 00:27:59,920
Speaker 5: months to a year of emergency savings, depending upon the

619
00:28:00,040 --> 00:28:02,399
Speaker 5: industry that you're in. How quickly can you replace your income?

620
00:28:02,600 --> 00:28:05,159
Speaker 5: If you're a nurse like my mom before she retired, three.

621
00:28:05,040 --> 00:28:05,680
Speaker 1: Months is enough.

622
00:28:05,880 --> 00:28:08,600
Speaker 5: You're an engineer like my sister six months or twelve

623
00:28:08,600 --> 00:28:11,159
Speaker 5: months might be ideal. So that's the first savings account.

624
00:28:11,280 --> 00:28:15,359
Speaker 5: And the second savings account is your goals savings account.

625
00:28:15,200 --> 00:28:16,080
Speaker 1: So it could be this.

626
00:28:16,320 --> 00:28:19,959
Speaker 5: This fourth account might be multiple accounts, so you might

627
00:28:20,000 --> 00:28:23,359
Speaker 5: have a savings account for travel. You might have one

628
00:28:23,400 --> 00:28:25,520
Speaker 5: so you can start investing, so you could buy a house.

629
00:28:25,880 --> 00:28:32,480
Speaker 5: So spending, checking bills, checking emergency savings, goal savings, and

630
00:28:32,560 --> 00:28:34,000
Speaker 5: so what I had to my husband do once we

631
00:28:34,040 --> 00:28:36,479
Speaker 5: got married because I was like, all right, I need

632
00:28:36,600 --> 00:28:39,560
Speaker 5: you to be more financially responsible and I realized, you

633
00:28:39,640 --> 00:28:41,560
Speaker 5: know what, I need to show him how to budget

634
00:28:41,600 --> 00:28:43,840
Speaker 5: without budgeting. We just did the math on paper on

635
00:28:43,920 --> 00:28:45,600
Speaker 5: how much he had to put in each account. I

636
00:28:45,760 --> 00:28:47,840
Speaker 5: was like, take this paper with you to the nice

637
00:28:47,920 --> 00:28:48,960
Speaker 5: lady at hr see.

638
00:28:50,240 --> 00:28:52,640
Speaker 1: Oh wait, what's your sign? Are you capricorn?

639
00:28:54,400 --> 00:28:54,560
Speaker 6: Huh?

640
00:28:55,640 --> 00:29:00,480
Speaker 1: I'm a Libra. Everything's beautiful, it must be. It's violence.

641
00:29:00,480 --> 00:29:01,400
Speaker 1: It's all about balnce.

642
00:29:01,400 --> 00:29:01,520
Speaker 5: You know.

643
00:29:02,200 --> 00:29:04,520
Speaker 1: Is your closet labeled like my mother she's a Libra. No,

644
00:29:05,520 --> 00:29:06,520
Speaker 1: I'm the opposite.

645
00:29:06,560 --> 00:29:11,520
Speaker 5: I'm the total mess, right So I so, I you know,

646
00:29:11,640 --> 00:29:13,400
Speaker 5: I told him, like, you know, go tell the people

647
00:29:13,440 --> 00:29:15,440
Speaker 5: this is where you're gonna put the money, and so

648
00:29:15,680 --> 00:29:18,560
Speaker 5: now he loves it because it's a budget without budgeting.

649
00:29:18,800 --> 00:29:21,160
Speaker 5: Literally his money used to come in land in one account.

650
00:29:21,640 --> 00:29:25,240
Speaker 5: Now his job will only let him split up to four.

651
00:29:25,560 --> 00:29:27,280
Speaker 5: Some places will only let you split up to two,

652
00:29:27,840 --> 00:29:29,320
Speaker 5: and some places will only let you do one. And

653
00:29:29,400 --> 00:29:31,160
Speaker 5: that's okay because then you could do the split yourself

654
00:29:31,200 --> 00:29:34,120
Speaker 5: once it lands, you could have those transfers happen automatically.

655
00:29:34,360 --> 00:29:36,800
Speaker 5: Especially as a parent you're so busy. Automation is a

656
00:29:36,840 --> 00:29:39,600
Speaker 5: new discipline. Let it be your bff, right. And so,

657
00:29:39,760 --> 00:29:42,480
Speaker 5: as a result, all he cares about, and all he

658
00:29:42,560 --> 00:29:44,840
Speaker 5: has to think about is that first checking account, the

659
00:29:44,880 --> 00:29:47,160
Speaker 5: one attached to debit card. He could do whatever he

660
00:29:47,200 --> 00:29:49,560
Speaker 5: wants with that, because he knows that's his spending money,

661
00:29:49,640 --> 00:29:51,240
Speaker 5: and he knows did I pay the bills?

662
00:29:51,320 --> 00:29:55,160
Speaker 1: Sure did? Did I contribute to our emergency account? Sure did?

663
00:29:55,600 --> 00:29:58,480
Speaker 1: Did I contribute to our goals? Sure did? So when

664
00:29:58,520 --> 00:30:00,720
Speaker 1: I see him with you know, new Jordan, I don't.

665
00:30:00,880 --> 00:30:05,200
Speaker 1: I used to be like, so excuse me, sir, but

666
00:30:05,840 --> 00:30:08,720
Speaker 1: our vacation fund or right, But now I know it's not.

667
00:30:08,920 --> 00:30:11,600
Speaker 5: I know that he swiped his card, you know, and

668
00:30:12,120 --> 00:30:13,960
Speaker 5: and it was money that was set aside for those

669
00:30:14,000 --> 00:30:16,240
Speaker 5: types of purchases. I'm telling you, it just alleviates. We

670
00:30:16,360 --> 00:30:17,920
Speaker 5: never really argued over money before.

671
00:30:18,120 --> 00:30:18,840
Speaker 1: But I'm not gonna lie.

672
00:30:18,880 --> 00:30:22,040
Speaker 5: There was tension before about like well how much did

673
00:30:22,080 --> 00:30:22,560
Speaker 5: you spend on that?

674
00:30:22,680 --> 00:30:23,280
Speaker 1: But what about this?

675
00:30:23,480 --> 00:30:25,600
Speaker 5: And now I'm not worried about it because I know

676
00:30:25,760 --> 00:30:28,240
Speaker 5: that the money is landing and the money that he's

677
00:30:28,360 --> 00:30:30,440
Speaker 5: using is allocated for him, and the money that I'm

678
00:30:30,520 --> 00:30:33,400
Speaker 5: using is allocated for me. I love to me in

679
00:30:33,480 --> 00:30:37,080
Speaker 5: a relationship, I love me you us. That's what I

680
00:30:37,200 --> 00:30:39,400
Speaker 5: like to think about money in a relationship. You don't

681
00:30:39,440 --> 00:30:41,080
Speaker 5: have to share accounts if you don't want to. But

682
00:30:41,440 --> 00:30:44,040
Speaker 5: if you are in a partnership, like a long term partnership,

683
00:30:44,120 --> 00:30:46,360
Speaker 5: especially if you're living together, there's already us.

684
00:30:46,560 --> 00:30:49,240
Speaker 1: You're paying bills likely together, So me, you us is

685
00:30:49,280 --> 00:30:50,720
Speaker 1: what I like to think about with money.

686
00:30:51,240 --> 00:30:54,800
Speaker 3: I think so many people because I remember, like when

687
00:30:54,840 --> 00:30:56,840
Speaker 3: I had a job that had HR them giving me

688
00:30:56,920 --> 00:30:58,960
Speaker 3: options to have, like you can put this slush into

689
00:30:59,000 --> 00:31:00,760
Speaker 3: this account. I'm like, big, I'm putting all that in

690
00:31:00,840 --> 00:31:03,840
Speaker 3: this one, but the fucking account because I need every penny.

691
00:31:04,200 --> 00:31:06,840
Speaker 3: I think for a lot of people sometimes like you're like,

692
00:31:06,880 --> 00:31:09,000
Speaker 3: I don't make enough money to put a certain amount

693
00:31:09,000 --> 00:31:11,080
Speaker 3: of money here, like this is money that I need

694
00:31:11,440 --> 00:31:12,080
Speaker 3: if you're living.

695
00:31:11,960 --> 00:31:12,680
Speaker 1: Paycheck to paycheck.

696
00:31:12,760 --> 00:31:15,320
Speaker 3: Yeah, but it's just like you have to start somewhere

697
00:31:15,440 --> 00:31:17,520
Speaker 3: to even begin that process. And I think for a

698
00:31:17,600 --> 00:31:20,440
Speaker 3: lot of people that's so scary because we're always like

699
00:31:21,160 --> 00:31:23,520
Speaker 3: we're always functioning from a place of scarcity. You know,

700
00:31:23,640 --> 00:31:25,760
Speaker 3: what if I don't have enough to do this? And

701
00:31:25,840 --> 00:31:28,400
Speaker 3: it's also like you don't You're you're you don't want

702
00:31:28,440 --> 00:31:30,959
Speaker 3: to do the you know, the noodle diet. You're like, well,

703
00:31:30,960 --> 00:31:32,240
Speaker 3: if I want to go do this, I want to

704
00:31:32,280 --> 00:31:35,520
Speaker 3: have the money, you know, and not really thinking long term.

705
00:31:35,560 --> 00:31:39,160
Speaker 3: I've been listening you know, short term ols, long term wins.

706
00:31:40,080 --> 00:31:41,400
Speaker 5: You got to take the short term l for the

707
00:31:41,480 --> 00:31:43,640
Speaker 5: long term w And I'll say this, I have lived

708
00:31:43,640 --> 00:31:46,640
Speaker 5: paycheck to pay I have lived under paycheck to paycheck.

709
00:31:46,520 --> 00:31:49,480
Speaker 1: Where my bill said ten and my money said eight.

710
00:31:49,840 --> 00:31:52,280
Speaker 1: I'm like, since I need you to catch up. You

711
00:31:52,400 --> 00:31:53,200
Speaker 1: are in that position.

712
00:31:53,680 --> 00:31:56,560
Speaker 5: And honestly, that's okay because that's what happens, like literally

713
00:31:56,640 --> 00:31:58,240
Speaker 5: and geting with money. This is such for that says,

714
00:31:58,360 --> 00:31:59,120
Speaker 5: but what if I'm broke?

715
00:31:59,160 --> 00:31:59,400
Speaker 1: Broke?

716
00:32:00,760 --> 00:32:03,880
Speaker 5: Right, because it happens and So if you're broke, broke honestly,

717
00:32:03,960 --> 00:32:06,760
Speaker 5: which means that the money you make in every month

718
00:32:06,880 --> 00:32:08,960
Speaker 5: is not enough to cover your basic bills, then you

719
00:32:09,040 --> 00:32:11,800
Speaker 5: have to look at money differently. And this is gonna

720
00:32:11,800 --> 00:32:13,640
Speaker 5: sound crazy, but I'm gonna give you permission for some

721
00:32:13,760 --> 00:32:15,560
Speaker 5: things to be late, because what else can you do?

722
00:32:16,080 --> 00:32:17,160
Speaker 1: So you're going to.

723
00:32:17,160 --> 00:32:19,560
Speaker 5: Look at your budget and you're gonna ask yourself, what

724
00:32:19,600 --> 00:32:21,760
Speaker 5: are my health and safety bills? The bills that I

725
00:32:21,920 --> 00:32:25,040
Speaker 5: must pay to maintain my health, to maintain my safety.

726
00:32:25,520 --> 00:32:27,240
Speaker 5: So literally, there were times when I would look and

727
00:32:27,280 --> 00:32:30,120
Speaker 5: I'd be like, there's not enough. Verizon, get off my back, girl,

728
00:32:30,240 --> 00:32:30,640
Speaker 5: what part of it?

729
00:32:30,640 --> 00:32:32,840
Speaker 1: There's not enough. You're just gonna have to wait because

730
00:32:32,880 --> 00:32:34,160
Speaker 1: I have to buy my asthma pump.

731
00:32:34,440 --> 00:32:36,520
Speaker 5: I have to pay this rent, because I have to

732
00:32:36,560 --> 00:32:38,200
Speaker 5: have a place to live, I have to buy food,

733
00:32:38,640 --> 00:32:40,160
Speaker 5: and if there's something left over, okay.

734
00:32:40,440 --> 00:32:41,080
Speaker 1: But here's the thing.

735
00:32:41,160 --> 00:32:43,040
Speaker 5: I used to call those companies and let them know

736
00:32:43,680 --> 00:32:46,880
Speaker 5: I don't have it. Is there a hardship program? Some

737
00:32:47,000 --> 00:32:48,480
Speaker 5: of them said yes and put me on it, and

738
00:32:48,560 --> 00:32:50,640
Speaker 5: some of them didn't, And they still kept calling me

739
00:32:50,800 --> 00:32:52,560
Speaker 5: because you know, they want their money. And I understand,

740
00:32:52,960 --> 00:32:55,479
Speaker 5: and I went and I used to send those companies

741
00:32:55,520 --> 00:32:57,840
Speaker 5: a cease and desist letter because I was like, look,

742
00:32:58,320 --> 00:32:59,680
Speaker 5: I'm not gonna let you stress me out.

743
00:33:00,400 --> 00:33:02,400
Speaker 1: But what I wait, you wrote them a cease and

744
00:33:02,440 --> 00:33:08,040
Speaker 1: desist letter? Wait, because here sent me? Yeah?

745
00:33:08,480 --> 00:33:09,280
Speaker 6: I know.

746
00:33:09,320 --> 00:33:11,520
Speaker 5: Because here's why I know. It sounds so crazy because

747
00:33:11,560 --> 00:33:12,840
Speaker 5: other financial folks will tell you.

748
00:33:12,840 --> 00:33:14,720
Speaker 1: This, But here's the thing.

749
00:33:15,120 --> 00:33:17,000
Speaker 5: Just because you owe someone, it does not allow you

750
00:33:17,160 --> 00:33:18,800
Speaker 5: to harass me and to mistreat me.

751
00:33:19,320 --> 00:33:19,720
Speaker 1: It's just not.

752
00:33:20,200 --> 00:33:22,080
Speaker 5: It doesn't give you just calls to do that I

753
00:33:22,200 --> 00:33:23,640
Speaker 5: owe you. It doesn't mean that you can call me

754
00:33:23,680 --> 00:33:25,240
Speaker 5: every morning, noon, and night. It got to be like

755
00:33:25,360 --> 00:33:27,080
Speaker 5: literally my phone would ring and my hand would shake.

756
00:33:27,520 --> 00:33:29,120
Speaker 4: So I was like, you know what, I.

757
00:33:29,200 --> 00:33:33,760
Speaker 1: Literally found I google seats this letter after they called.

758
00:33:33,640 --> 00:33:36,200
Speaker 5: My sister at work, and my son was a My

759
00:33:36,320 --> 00:33:38,240
Speaker 5: sister was a scientist. So they try to be sneaky.

760
00:33:38,240 --> 00:33:39,760
Speaker 5: They know, they try to call your family to shame

761
00:33:39,840 --> 00:33:42,720
Speaker 5: you shame. My sister was a scientist, was working on

762
00:33:42,800 --> 00:33:45,240
Speaker 5: a cancer drug at the time, and she she didn't

763
00:33:45,240 --> 00:33:47,000
Speaker 5: even give us her work number because she couldn't get

764
00:33:47,000 --> 00:33:49,160
Speaker 5: phone calls because the company she worked for was so

765
00:33:49,240 --> 00:33:53,160
Speaker 5: afraid that that they were that they would give away

766
00:33:53,200 --> 00:33:55,080
Speaker 5: those trade secrets. So she's like, yo, you're gonna give

767
00:33:55,120 --> 00:33:56,320
Speaker 5: me fire. So that's when I was like, I have

768
00:33:56,440 --> 00:33:58,920
Speaker 5: to do something. So I googled cease and desist letter.

769
00:33:59,320 --> 00:33:59,920
Speaker 1: I found one.

770
00:34:00,360 --> 00:34:02,640
Speaker 5: I went down to Staples with my last little seventy

771
00:34:02,680 --> 00:34:05,640
Speaker 5: five cents and I faxed it because it's important that

772
00:34:05,800 --> 00:34:09,879
Speaker 5: you know they get it instantly, they're really there.

773
00:34:10,640 --> 00:34:12,520
Speaker 1: But no, some of these companies are really bad.

774
00:34:12,560 --> 00:34:15,880
Speaker 5: So I asked, it's important your season assists letter that

775
00:34:16,040 --> 00:34:17,919
Speaker 5: you do give them a way to contact you because

776
00:34:17,960 --> 00:34:20,240
Speaker 5: you want them to. But I said, you can email

777
00:34:20,360 --> 00:34:22,680
Speaker 5: me here, and you can send me letters here. You

778
00:34:22,760 --> 00:34:26,800
Speaker 5: are no longer allowed to call me at these numbers

779
00:34:27,080 --> 00:34:29,480
Speaker 5: or any numbers. And by law, there's something called the

780
00:34:29,560 --> 00:34:33,560
Speaker 5: Fair Debt Collections Practices Act right, and so that those

781
00:34:33,719 --> 00:34:36,840
Speaker 5: there's a collection of laws that are there to help you,

782
00:34:37,080 --> 00:34:39,239
Speaker 5: the person that might owe, and so in that in

783
00:34:39,360 --> 00:34:42,040
Speaker 5: those laws, one of them is that if you request,

784
00:34:42,239 --> 00:34:44,680
Speaker 5: formally request that a debt collector stopped calling you, they

785
00:34:44,800 --> 00:34:46,960
Speaker 5: must by law or they are breaking the law. And

786
00:34:47,040 --> 00:34:49,160
Speaker 5: so they they are very clear on that. So I

787
00:34:49,280 --> 00:34:51,600
Speaker 5: send the letter and within a day they stopped. But yes,

788
00:34:51,640 --> 00:34:53,520
Speaker 5: they can email me and they can mail me, which

789
00:34:53,520 --> 00:34:55,800
Speaker 5: is fine because you do want to have connection with

790
00:34:56,000 --> 00:34:56,719
Speaker 5: with who you owe.

791
00:34:56,960 --> 00:34:59,120
Speaker 1: And so when my life got a little better, then

792
00:34:59,160 --> 00:34:59,879
Speaker 1: I started to pay.

793
00:35:00,440 --> 00:35:02,840
Speaker 5: I mean, I just you can't squeeze what is it.

794
00:35:02,960 --> 00:35:05,200
Speaker 5: You can't squeeze blood from a turnip? Like if I

795
00:35:05,280 --> 00:35:05,840
Speaker 5: don't have it.

796
00:35:06,440 --> 00:35:08,480
Speaker 1: You have to take care of yourself. You have to

797
00:35:08,560 --> 00:35:09,760
Speaker 1: put your mask on first.

798
00:35:10,080 --> 00:35:11,920
Speaker 5: If you have children, you have to make sure your

799
00:35:12,040 --> 00:35:14,680
Speaker 5: kids have a safe place to live, food to eat,

800
00:35:15,080 --> 00:35:18,400
Speaker 5: you know. So I'm sorry, Cable, I get it, and

801
00:35:18,520 --> 00:35:19,920
Speaker 5: I know I owe you. I'm not saying I'm not

802
00:35:19,920 --> 00:35:21,960
Speaker 5: gonna pay you, but I'm not going to prioritize you

803
00:35:22,080 --> 00:35:24,359
Speaker 5: over my child. We're not going to prioritize you over

804
00:35:24,440 --> 00:35:25,240
Speaker 5: my health and safety.

805
00:35:25,520 --> 00:35:28,520
Speaker 1: It's okay to say that. And I promise you. You know,

806
00:35:28,760 --> 00:35:30,880
Speaker 1: once you find yourself a little wusah.

807
00:35:30,680 --> 00:35:33,600
Speaker 5: And then you learn to earn. So that's number step

808
00:35:33,719 --> 00:35:36,840
Speaker 5: number five and financial hollness. So financial hollness is so

809
00:35:36,960 --> 00:35:39,560
Speaker 5: in geting with money, it's ten steps to financial hollness.

810
00:35:39,600 --> 00:35:42,160
Speaker 5: So step number five is learning to earn because you

811
00:35:42,280 --> 00:35:44,399
Speaker 5: do have to learn to earn because when you don't

812
00:35:44,400 --> 00:35:44,920
Speaker 5: have enough.

813
00:35:44,840 --> 00:35:45,879
Speaker 1: Money at the end of the month.

814
00:35:46,120 --> 00:35:48,120
Speaker 5: You either have a spend too much issue or you

815
00:35:48,200 --> 00:35:50,520
Speaker 5: have a don't make enough issue, and I suspect for

816
00:35:50,600 --> 00:35:52,480
Speaker 5: most parents, quite honestly, it's likely.

817
00:35:52,360 --> 00:35:53,480
Speaker 1: I don't make enough issue.

818
00:35:53,640 --> 00:35:55,640
Speaker 5: So you do want to learn to earn, which is

819
00:35:55,719 --> 00:35:58,400
Speaker 5: something that I teach you. And so over time you

820
00:35:58,560 --> 00:36:00,960
Speaker 5: learn to earn, and then you have enough and then

821
00:36:01,040 --> 00:36:02,000
Speaker 5: you re engage.

822
00:36:01,719 --> 00:36:03,200
Speaker 1: The people that you own. That's what I did.

823
00:36:03,280 --> 00:36:05,920
Speaker 5: I remember literally there was a bunch of folks that

824
00:36:06,000 --> 00:36:08,600
Speaker 5: I owed, and slowly but surely, as I learned to earn,

825
00:36:08,640 --> 00:36:10,880
Speaker 5: I was able to re engage and say, Okay, how

826
00:36:10,960 --> 00:36:12,719
Speaker 5: much is it that I owe? Can I work out

827
00:36:12,719 --> 00:36:14,120
Speaker 5: a settlement? This is what I have, this is what

828
00:36:14,200 --> 00:36:16,040
Speaker 5: I can do next person, how much is it that?

829
00:36:16,440 --> 00:36:18,399
Speaker 5: It took a number of years and now here I am.

830
00:36:18,520 --> 00:36:21,000
Speaker 5: I am literally debt free like a five year old. Yes,

831
00:36:21,360 --> 00:36:24,279
Speaker 5: I'm talking about debt free like my no mortgage, no

832
00:36:24,480 --> 00:36:27,440
Speaker 5: car notes, no student loans like debt free like a

833
00:36:27,520 --> 00:36:30,200
Speaker 5: five year old. And so it is possible. In less

834
00:36:30,200 --> 00:36:32,279
Speaker 5: than like seven years, I was able to accomplish that.

835
00:36:32,640 --> 00:36:35,080
Speaker 5: So if you're listening and you're feeling bad and you're

836
00:36:35,080 --> 00:36:39,000
Speaker 5: feeling ashamed, don't because I know exactly how you're feeling.

837
00:36:39,080 --> 00:36:40,600
Speaker 5: I know you feel like, damn, I should have it

838
00:36:40,600 --> 00:36:41,080
Speaker 5: all together.

839
00:36:41,320 --> 00:36:43,840
Speaker 1: Houses. Was there money class in school?

840
00:36:44,880 --> 00:36:47,760
Speaker 5: You know? Likely not, and even if there was, okay,

841
00:36:48,520 --> 00:36:50,360
Speaker 5: like the first time you rode your bike, did you

842
00:36:50,440 --> 00:36:53,319
Speaker 5: not fall? Imagine yelling at your kid when they're learning

843
00:36:53,320 --> 00:36:55,520
Speaker 5: to walk, like, girl, get your legs together.

844
00:36:55,680 --> 00:36:56,239
Speaker 4: Girl, you.

845
00:36:58,120 --> 00:36:59,160
Speaker 3: Came out three months ago.

846
00:36:59,360 --> 00:37:03,319
Speaker 5: Shit, we don't have those expectations, right. We give our

847
00:37:03,400 --> 00:37:05,719
Speaker 5: children the grace and the space to learn, we need

848
00:37:05,760 --> 00:37:08,440
Speaker 5: to do the same for ourselves. Give you yourself the

849
00:37:08,560 --> 00:37:09,759
Speaker 5: grace and the space to learn.

850
00:37:09,800 --> 00:37:11,520
Speaker 1: I promise you. It makes life so much easier.

851
00:37:11,719 --> 00:37:13,480
Speaker 5: And there is light on the other side of the

852
00:37:13,520 --> 00:37:15,920
Speaker 5: financial tunnel. I promise, because I'm over here waving like,

853
00:37:16,120 --> 00:37:17,799
Speaker 5: come on, is this cue over here?

854
00:37:18,400 --> 00:37:18,560
Speaker 4: Right?

855
00:37:19,520 --> 00:37:23,759
Speaker 1: You look happy and glowing. Shit, I was living anxiety free.

856
00:37:23,800 --> 00:37:25,200
Speaker 1: I'm trying to live anxiety for you.

857
00:37:26,000 --> 00:37:28,399
Speaker 3: And a lot of times I think that anxiety from

858
00:37:28,440 --> 00:37:30,640
Speaker 3: people calling and stressing you out because I know I

859
00:37:30,760 --> 00:37:34,160
Speaker 3: have an avoidance motherfucking issue, and I will avoid it

860
00:37:34,760 --> 00:37:37,399
Speaker 3: and then get the shakes or get like my palm

861
00:37:37,640 --> 00:37:40,320
Speaker 3: sweat when I think about like someone calling to collect

862
00:37:40,360 --> 00:37:42,760
Speaker 3: some shit, and it's just the whole thing makes.

863
00:37:42,560 --> 00:37:43,360
Speaker 1: You not deal with it.

864
00:37:43,680 --> 00:37:48,120
Speaker 3: And that doesn't help either. They'll add fees, add late fees.

865
00:37:48,160 --> 00:37:50,120
Speaker 3: They'll start taking that ship shirt out of your bank account.

866
00:37:50,600 --> 00:37:52,560
Speaker 3: So there are just so many things that.

867
00:37:53,600 --> 00:37:57,160
Speaker 2: Again, when driving back what the affirmation was today about shame,

868
00:37:57,239 --> 00:37:59,640
Speaker 2: and it's like, yeah, sometimes you have to look shame

869
00:37:59,680 --> 00:38:03,320
Speaker 2: in the face and just say, okay, look hello, hello Verison, listen,

870
00:38:03,560 --> 00:38:06,160
Speaker 2: fuck you, you know, and make that call instead of

871
00:38:06,360 --> 00:38:10,280
Speaker 2: avoiding it, declining that call, declining that call, not opening

872
00:38:10,360 --> 00:38:10,759
Speaker 2: that letter.

873
00:38:11,120 --> 00:38:12,799
Speaker 3: We all have done it. You know, there is really

874
00:38:12,880 --> 00:38:16,200
Speaker 3: no shame because everyone has done it for the most part.

875
00:38:16,680 --> 00:38:17,080
Speaker 5: M hmm.

876
00:38:17,440 --> 00:38:19,480
Speaker 3: We're not like born with the we don't have the

877
00:38:19,560 --> 00:38:21,560
Speaker 3: school doesn't teach us a lot of times, our parents

878
00:38:21,600 --> 00:38:23,600
Speaker 3: don't teach us. And we are students, you know, we

879
00:38:23,680 --> 00:38:25,840
Speaker 3: are babies in this in this space because it's not

880
00:38:26,000 --> 00:38:26,719
Speaker 3: something we've done.

881
00:38:26,800 --> 00:38:28,880
Speaker 2: But with the idea of learning to earn, like is

882
00:38:28,960 --> 00:38:34,040
Speaker 2: that like a matter of like like finding a new hustle,

883
00:38:34,120 --> 00:38:35,800
Speaker 2: like tapping into legs what you're.

884
00:38:35,680 --> 00:38:38,040
Speaker 1: Good at, or like so get you with money. I

885
00:38:38,120 --> 00:38:39,680
Speaker 1: teach you this. I show you a bunch of ways

886
00:38:39,719 --> 00:38:40,239
Speaker 1: to learn to earn.

887
00:38:40,360 --> 00:38:42,880
Speaker 5: First, I show you that like if you currently have

888
00:38:43,000 --> 00:38:44,759
Speaker 5: a job, that's one of the best places to see

889
00:38:44,760 --> 00:38:45,799
Speaker 5: if you can increase.

890
00:38:45,560 --> 00:38:48,320
Speaker 1: What you earn. So I show you how do you negotiate,

891
00:38:48,560 --> 00:38:50,240
Speaker 1: how do you prepare to negotiate.

892
00:38:49,880 --> 00:38:52,040
Speaker 5: For potentially to earn more money, to earn it like

893
00:38:52,360 --> 00:38:54,520
Speaker 5: to earn a raise, to get a raise, or to

894
00:38:54,640 --> 00:38:57,239
Speaker 5: be moved up into a position that pays you more. Right,

895
00:38:57,360 --> 00:38:59,239
Speaker 5: so you want to look currently at where you are.

896
00:38:59,440 --> 00:39:02,200
Speaker 5: But then also too, you might look for a side hustle.

897
00:39:02,320 --> 00:39:03,880
Speaker 5: So in the back of my mind, and everyone should

898
00:39:03,880 --> 00:39:04,959
Speaker 5: do this. In the back of their minds.

899
00:39:05,320 --> 00:39:06,160
Speaker 1: You should have a.

900
00:39:06,719 --> 00:39:09,239
Speaker 5: Get out of jail or like the what is it

901
00:39:09,360 --> 00:39:11,080
Speaker 5: like when you want to break the glass? Break the

902
00:39:11,120 --> 00:39:12,920
Speaker 5: glass in case of emergency? You should have that in

903
00:39:12,920 --> 00:39:15,600
Speaker 5: the back of your mind. And behind the glass is

904
00:39:15,640 --> 00:39:17,719
Speaker 5: a side hustle that you can enact. Like for me, now,

905
00:39:17,840 --> 00:39:20,439
Speaker 5: currently let's just say shit hits the fan. I'm like, ah,

906
00:39:21,040 --> 00:39:22,800
Speaker 5: I know for a fact I can go on social

907
00:39:22,840 --> 00:39:24,120
Speaker 5: media and say, who would like to do some one

908
00:39:24,200 --> 00:39:27,279
Speaker 5: on one with me as their for their finances? Right,

909
00:39:27,360 --> 00:39:28,840
Speaker 5: So I'm not doing that now because I don't need to,

910
00:39:28,920 --> 00:39:30,520
Speaker 5: but I know that I can and I can make

911
00:39:30,600 --> 00:39:33,319
Speaker 5: money regularly doing So when I was a preschool teacher,

912
00:39:33,320 --> 00:39:35,959
Speaker 5: because I taught preschool for ten years before I became

913
00:39:36,000 --> 00:39:40,280
Speaker 5: the budgetista, my break the glass was I could tutor

914
00:39:40,360 --> 00:39:42,360
Speaker 5: and I could babysit. And I used to do that

915
00:39:42,440 --> 00:39:48,160
Speaker 5: when money was low because who doesn't want an active, fun, vivacious.

916
00:39:47,760 --> 00:39:51,440
Speaker 6: Cute preschool teacher fight to babysit their kids, right, So

917
00:39:51,600 --> 00:39:53,120
Speaker 6: it was easy to be like, hey, and if I

918
00:39:53,200 --> 00:39:55,000
Speaker 6: need a babysitting and so I used to make a

919
00:39:55,080 --> 00:39:57,520
Speaker 6: few thousand dollars a summer during the summer when money

920
00:39:57,640 --> 00:39:59,759
Speaker 6: was low and I wasn't teaching, and so like.

921
00:40:00,040 --> 00:40:02,480
Speaker 5: So those are the two ways that you can really

922
00:40:02,480 --> 00:40:05,480
Speaker 5: start leaning in to make money, to learn to earn,

923
00:40:05,560 --> 00:40:07,800
Speaker 5: because you have to practice that as well. Having just

924
00:40:07,920 --> 00:40:10,880
Speaker 5: one source of income is not enough. It's okay to

925
00:40:10,920 --> 00:40:13,200
Speaker 5: have one source of income, but you should always have

926
00:40:13,360 --> 00:40:15,600
Speaker 5: But if I had to, and I already kind of

927
00:40:15,640 --> 00:40:17,320
Speaker 5: already had that backup, Like, you know, I'm want to

928
00:40:17,360 --> 00:40:18,000
Speaker 5: got a baking cakes.

929
00:40:18,040 --> 00:40:20,240
Speaker 1: Everybody tells me I could do that, you know, dinner's

930
00:40:20,239 --> 00:40:21,400
Speaker 1: are my thing. I could do that.

931
00:40:21,920 --> 00:40:24,319
Speaker 5: You know what. My friend is always asking me if

932
00:40:24,360 --> 00:40:26,279
Speaker 5: I'll help her, you know, with her makeup. You know,

933
00:40:26,400 --> 00:40:28,919
Speaker 5: I could certainly do makeup on the side, so knowing

934
00:40:29,000 --> 00:40:29,680
Speaker 5: what those things are.

935
00:40:29,880 --> 00:40:29,920
Speaker 6: Like.

936
00:40:30,600 --> 00:40:31,279
Speaker 1: I have a friend of mine.

937
00:40:31,360 --> 00:40:33,680
Speaker 5: She's a single mom with two little ones, a five

938
00:40:33,760 --> 00:40:37,480
Speaker 5: year old and a three year old, and she's super smart.

939
00:40:37,640 --> 00:40:39,200
Speaker 5: So one of the things she's been doing is she

940
00:40:39,320 --> 00:40:43,080
Speaker 5: has been learning to get contracts from the government. So

941
00:40:43,200 --> 00:40:45,840
Speaker 5: she's taking like these free classes online and she's like,

942
00:40:45,880 --> 00:40:48,239
Speaker 5: oh wow, Like literally, the government sometimes is looking for

943
00:40:48,320 --> 00:40:51,520
Speaker 5: pencils and they're like, we'll pay thirty thousand dollars for pencils,

944
00:40:51,800 --> 00:40:54,279
Speaker 5: and then she'll go online and be like, hey, is

945
00:40:54,320 --> 00:40:56,840
Speaker 5: there a place I could order pencils for ten thousand

946
00:40:56,880 --> 00:40:59,120
Speaker 5: dollars and then the government is like then. So she

947
00:40:59,280 --> 00:41:04,080
Speaker 5: learned to write for those types of contracts to say, hey, government, yes,

948
00:41:04,280 --> 00:41:08,320
Speaker 5: I can send you pencils for thirty thousand dollars, and

949
00:41:08,400 --> 00:41:10,040
Speaker 5: then she sends them the pencils that she was able

950
00:41:10,080 --> 00:41:12,320
Speaker 5: to order for the for the ten you know, and

951
00:41:12,440 --> 00:41:13,959
Speaker 5: so that that's something that she'd learned.

952
00:41:14,400 --> 00:41:16,040
Speaker 1: That's her hustle on the side to be like, okay,

953
00:41:16,160 --> 00:41:16,680
Speaker 1: I can learn.

954
00:41:16,840 --> 00:41:19,600
Speaker 5: And I know another friend, my friend Tila, she was

955
00:41:19,640 --> 00:41:23,360
Speaker 5: a single mother and she learned to start investing, so trading,

956
00:41:23,560 --> 00:41:25,680
Speaker 5: so she got she so at her job that was

957
00:41:25,719 --> 00:41:27,960
Speaker 5: really treating her poorly because she was like, they don't

958
00:41:27,960 --> 00:41:30,480
Speaker 5: respect the fact they actually have children, and so she

959
00:41:30,680 --> 00:41:32,880
Speaker 5: was like, so she's like she saved them as much

960
00:41:32,880 --> 00:41:35,399
Speaker 5: as she could, and she started to practice, like Okay,

961
00:41:35,800 --> 00:41:38,400
Speaker 5: I'm saving up money and I'm gonna practice investing. It

962
00:41:38,480 --> 00:41:40,640
Speaker 5: took her a year to get, like you know, to

963
00:41:40,680 --> 00:41:43,319
Speaker 5: a place where she felt comfortable she was able to quit,

964
00:41:43,560 --> 00:41:45,800
Speaker 5: take that money that she saved up and trade. So

965
00:41:45,920 --> 00:41:48,160
Speaker 5: trading is when you buy and sell actively in the market,

966
00:41:48,280 --> 00:41:51,080
Speaker 5: Like you buy at two dollars and then you sell

967
00:41:51,120 --> 00:41:53,440
Speaker 5: at five, and then you buy again at four dollars

968
00:41:53,640 --> 00:41:55,600
Speaker 5: and then you sell at nine. So she was living

969
00:41:55,719 --> 00:41:58,440
Speaker 5: off of the money she was making from trading because

970
00:41:58,480 --> 00:42:00,480
Speaker 5: she told herself, you know what, I don't want to

971
00:42:00,480 --> 00:42:03,160
Speaker 5: stay in this situation, situation circumstance. I want to be

972
00:42:03,239 --> 00:42:04,960
Speaker 5: here for my children. I want to work at a

973
00:42:05,080 --> 00:42:06,839
Speaker 5: job or make money in a way where I could

974
00:42:06,840 --> 00:42:09,440
Speaker 5: still be this active mom. So there are ways out

975
00:42:09,520 --> 00:42:12,280
Speaker 5: there for you to make additional income.

976
00:42:12,480 --> 00:42:13,319
Speaker 1: You just have to be right.

977
00:42:13,400 --> 00:42:15,000
Speaker 2: I think that's the thing too, is that people get

978
00:42:15,080 --> 00:42:20,200
Speaker 2: so you know, I guess it's stuck in their ways essentially,

979
00:42:20,480 --> 00:42:23,520
Speaker 2: and it's again like fearful, like I don't know if

980
00:42:23,560 --> 00:42:23,960
Speaker 2: I could do that?

981
00:42:24,080 --> 00:42:26,480
Speaker 1: Can I do that? And it's like, if you don't

982
00:42:26,480 --> 00:42:28,719
Speaker 1: want to be living paycheck to paycheck, you can do that.

983
00:42:29,840 --> 00:42:33,040
Speaker 3: Yeah, you have to evaluate what you can and cannot

984
00:42:33,080 --> 00:42:35,480
Speaker 3: handle and what you can and cannot do. You know,

985
00:42:37,560 --> 00:42:40,800
Speaker 3: a waitress for a long time, like during and after college,

986
00:42:40,880 --> 00:42:43,239
Speaker 3: and it was such quick, easy money. You know, I

987
00:42:43,280 --> 00:42:46,000
Speaker 3: would just like make three hundred dollars a night below

988
00:42:46,080 --> 00:42:48,440
Speaker 3: that shit, go back to work, do it again. And

989
00:42:48,600 --> 00:42:50,279
Speaker 3: then at the end of the college I didn't have

990
00:42:50,320 --> 00:42:51,960
Speaker 3: shit to show for it, you know. I was, I

991
00:42:52,080 --> 00:42:54,839
Speaker 3: mean thousands of dollars and was like doing a bunch

992
00:42:54,920 --> 00:42:57,000
Speaker 3: of nothing, but I hadn't anything to show for it.

993
00:42:57,040 --> 00:42:59,560
Speaker 3: And I attempted to finish college that didn't work out.

994
00:43:00,160 --> 00:43:03,839
Speaker 3: My parents stopped paying and didn't tell me. I'm like, damn,

995
00:43:03,920 --> 00:43:05,360
Speaker 3: what am I going to do. I was in a

996
00:43:05,400 --> 00:43:08,360
Speaker 3: different city, you know, I was alone, and I started waitressing.

997
00:43:08,400 --> 00:43:11,359
Speaker 3: That was my savior. But when I moved back home

998
00:43:11,719 --> 00:43:14,120
Speaker 3: a I was super embarrassed to move back home because

999
00:43:14,160 --> 00:43:15,719
Speaker 3: I was like, I didn't even I'd even come back

1000
00:43:15,760 --> 00:43:17,080
Speaker 3: with the shit. I went to go get which was

1001
00:43:17,120 --> 00:43:21,040
Speaker 3: with a degree, and then I start waitressing again. But

1002
00:43:21,120 --> 00:43:23,320
Speaker 3: I like, I was like, fuck it, I'm going to

1003
00:43:23,400 --> 00:43:26,360
Speaker 3: go get a trade, and so I went to Estetusian school.

1004
00:43:26,400 --> 00:43:28,959
Speaker 3: I found like the cheapest esstetuition school I could find,

1005
00:43:29,080 --> 00:43:32,200
Speaker 3: was like the LAUSD version. And I was like, one

1006
00:43:32,280 --> 00:43:34,160
Speaker 3: thing's for certain, three things for sure. If I get

1007
00:43:34,200 --> 00:43:36,520
Speaker 3: this shit done in nine to twelve months, at least,

1008
00:43:36,520 --> 00:43:38,160
Speaker 3: I'll have it and no one can take it from me.

1009
00:43:39,000 --> 00:43:40,759
Speaker 3: And that's what I did. And I've had like I

1010
00:43:41,280 --> 00:43:44,320
Speaker 3: do lashes, I do brows, but like you know, I

1011
00:43:44,400 --> 00:43:47,399
Speaker 3: took I knew I had to do something or else

1012
00:43:47,440 --> 00:43:49,719
Speaker 3: I was going to be waitressing forever. And I was

1013
00:43:49,800 --> 00:43:52,960
Speaker 3: realizing quickly like that wasn't my I couldn't do that forever.

1014
00:43:53,520 --> 00:43:55,200
Speaker 3: And so it's just like I think, sometimes people are

1015
00:43:55,280 --> 00:43:58,120
Speaker 3: unwilling to like take the risk, to take the time

1016
00:43:58,280 --> 00:44:00,280
Speaker 3: and invest in themselves a little bit. And so sometimes

1017
00:44:00,280 --> 00:44:02,759
Speaker 3: you gotta pay a little bit to come out and

1018
00:44:02,920 --> 00:44:05,920
Speaker 3: have you know, the trade or the certificate or whatever.

1019
00:44:06,719 --> 00:44:08,640
Speaker 3: So I think sometimes you know, you have to think

1020
00:44:08,719 --> 00:44:11,840
Speaker 3: out of the box. You can't always rely on this

1021
00:44:12,800 --> 00:44:16,239
Speaker 3: these jobs, these corporate companies to pay your bills. Because

1022
00:44:16,239 --> 00:44:17,480
Speaker 3: the truth is a lot of times they don't give

1023
00:44:17,480 --> 00:44:19,600
Speaker 3: a shit. They don't care about you and little Johnny,

1024
00:44:20,000 --> 00:44:23,080
Speaker 3: you know, and and they're nice for like if you

1025
00:44:23,160 --> 00:44:25,799
Speaker 3: love what you're doing, and there's human resources and there's

1026
00:44:25,880 --> 00:44:28,479
Speaker 3: a four oh one K, and there's health insurance, because

1027
00:44:28,480 --> 00:44:30,520
Speaker 3: that's another thing, like oh god, I'm stressed. I don't

1028
00:44:30,560 --> 00:44:31,320
Speaker 3: have health insurance.

1029
00:44:32,400 --> 00:44:34,920
Speaker 5: No, honestly, Mila, that's good because here's the thing. Sometimes

1030
00:44:34,960 --> 00:44:36,920
Speaker 5: we don't give enough sounds, enough credit. I know you

1031
00:44:37,000 --> 00:44:38,719
Speaker 5: feel like, oh I can't handle it. I'm like, I'm

1032
00:44:38,719 --> 00:44:40,920
Speaker 5: sorry you didn't. You didn't get birth to or whole

1033
00:44:40,960 --> 00:44:43,839
Speaker 5: human being, you know, like do you get dressed every day,

1034
00:44:43,880 --> 00:44:45,719
Speaker 5: you brush your teeth, you make sure this one eats,

1035
00:44:46,000 --> 00:44:48,200
Speaker 5: you make sure well, isn't that so crazy that like

1036
00:44:48,320 --> 00:44:50,080
Speaker 5: women will tell us I can't.

1037
00:44:50,360 --> 00:44:53,920
Speaker 1: I'm sorry. Who pushes out whole babies through their vaginas?

1038
00:44:55,680 --> 00:44:59,000
Speaker 1: You're built strong and built for tough, right, No, but

1039
00:44:59,120 --> 00:44:59,480
Speaker 1: for real?

1040
00:45:00,080 --> 00:45:02,120
Speaker 5: You So what I find with women when it comes

1041
00:45:02,160 --> 00:45:05,040
Speaker 5: to money that it is not a capability issue. Of

1042
00:45:05,160 --> 00:45:07,759
Speaker 5: course you're capable, you know, for you just have the

1043
00:45:07,800 --> 00:45:10,759
Speaker 5: wherewithal to say, you know what, Wow, I was cut

1044
00:45:10,840 --> 00:45:13,160
Speaker 5: off and finances were cut off. I'm gonna wait twists

1045
00:45:13,640 --> 00:45:16,000
Speaker 5: and to be able to make tips, make money, and

1046
00:45:16,080 --> 00:45:17,600
Speaker 5: then for you to be like, you know what, to

1047
00:45:17,680 --> 00:45:20,840
Speaker 5: have the wherewithal to say, you know what, I can see.

1048
00:45:20,719 --> 00:45:22,800
Speaker 1: Forward and I'd like something different.

1049
00:45:23,080 --> 00:45:25,000
Speaker 5: Let me get something that can't be taking When you

1050
00:45:25,080 --> 00:45:27,319
Speaker 5: said that, I'm like, there's nothing more genius, because that's

1051
00:45:27,360 --> 00:45:29,279
Speaker 5: exactly what happens when you learn something.

1052
00:45:29,160 --> 00:45:30,800
Speaker 1: That it can never be taken from you, no matter what.

1053
00:45:31,280 --> 00:45:33,840
Speaker 5: And then for you to go get your esthetition's license

1054
00:45:34,120 --> 00:45:36,200
Speaker 5: and now you have that, and now every girl wants

1055
00:45:36,239 --> 00:45:38,400
Speaker 5: to lash in a brow and all the things. You know.

1056
00:45:38,880 --> 00:45:41,840
Speaker 5: So I just to me, it shows me that what

1057
00:45:42,000 --> 00:45:45,239
Speaker 5: you're saying about yourself is not true because that's not

1058
00:45:45,280 --> 00:45:48,400
Speaker 5: how you're navigating life. It's just not It's just that

1059
00:45:48,480 --> 00:45:50,200
Speaker 5: because as a mom and as a woman, you're like,

1060
00:45:50,239 --> 00:45:51,759
Speaker 5: I just gotta get it done. But then when it

1061
00:45:51,800 --> 00:45:53,920
Speaker 5: comes to this, you're like, oh, I just know that.

1062
00:45:54,040 --> 00:45:56,120
Speaker 5: Meaning's like, girl, what are you talking about? We boss

1063
00:45:56,320 --> 00:45:59,279
Speaker 5: up every single day, right, don't we eat?

1064
00:45:59,520 --> 00:46:00,680
Speaker 1: You know, because if you.

1065
00:46:00,719 --> 00:46:02,840
Speaker 5: Were someone who were like because the way you navigate

1066
00:46:02,840 --> 00:46:04,680
Speaker 5: sate like your bills and I'm like, I'm just gonna

1067
00:46:04,680 --> 00:46:06,720
Speaker 5: avoid imagine you said that when it came to food

1068
00:46:07,000 --> 00:46:09,400
Speaker 5: and sheltered, you would be hungry and homeless.

1069
00:46:09,440 --> 00:46:11,000
Speaker 1: Like I just I just want well, just won't eat.

1070
00:46:11,040 --> 00:46:11,799
Speaker 1: We just won't eat tonight.

1071
00:46:11,840 --> 00:46:12,440
Speaker 4: You don't do that.

1072
00:46:13,000 --> 00:46:14,320
Speaker 1: So you have that in you.

1073
00:46:14,719 --> 00:46:16,960
Speaker 5: I want you to bring that Meala over to here.

1074
00:46:17,160 --> 00:46:18,360
Speaker 5: And so for those of you who are listening, you

1075
00:46:18,480 --> 00:46:20,680
Speaker 5: are the Meala as well. I want you to understand

1076
00:46:20,840 --> 00:46:23,320
Speaker 5: that sometimes it's a confidence issue, but it's not a

1077
00:46:23,400 --> 00:46:24,320
Speaker 5: capability issue.

1078
00:46:24,800 --> 00:46:28,239
Speaker 1: You are more than capable. You are, I promise you

1079
00:46:28,360 --> 00:46:30,040
Speaker 1: you are, and sometimes you just need that guidance.

1080
00:46:30,280 --> 00:46:33,000
Speaker 5: Honestly, it's the reason why you know, like I teach,

1081
00:46:33,280 --> 00:46:35,279
Speaker 5: It's the reason why I started the budget, Neissa, It's

1082
00:46:35,320 --> 00:46:37,280
Speaker 5: the reason why I wrote Get Good with Money, because

1083
00:46:37,760 --> 00:46:41,120
Speaker 5: I wanted like women like y'all who I knew had

1084
00:46:41,200 --> 00:46:43,840
Speaker 5: the capability and if they just had like literally like

1085
00:46:43,920 --> 00:46:47,000
Speaker 5: a sister girl to hold her hand and say, okay, girl,

1086
00:46:47,760 --> 00:46:49,719
Speaker 5: just do this. Don'torry about all other stuff. Yeah yah yea,

1087
00:46:49,760 --> 00:46:51,799
Speaker 5: yeah hear, you don't worry about them other people. Send

1088
00:46:51,880 --> 00:46:53,920
Speaker 5: us season to system, go away. We're working on some

1089
00:46:54,000 --> 00:46:56,759
Speaker 5: things right now, like just do this step one. We're

1090
00:46:56,760 --> 00:46:58,160
Speaker 5: gonna work on your budget So these are the ten

1091
00:46:58,160 --> 00:47:04,439
Speaker 5: steps to financial wholeness. It's budget that's one, two, savings, three, credit, four,

1092
00:47:04,640 --> 00:47:07,080
Speaker 5: debt five learning to earn, so that those are the

1093
00:47:07,160 --> 00:47:10,360
Speaker 5: foundational components of financial holeness. And you're like, okay, we

1094
00:47:10,440 --> 00:47:11,839
Speaker 5: got that, and then I walk you through the next

1095
00:47:11,880 --> 00:47:17,560
Speaker 5: one six, investing seven, getting good with money, eight, net

1096
00:47:17,640 --> 00:47:21,640
Speaker 5: worth nine, getting your money team ten estate planning. And

1097
00:47:21,760 --> 00:47:25,520
Speaker 5: so that's the next level of financial financial holeness, and

1098
00:47:25,640 --> 00:47:28,160
Speaker 5: so needing someone to walk you through. And that's what

1099
00:47:28,239 --> 00:47:30,919
Speaker 5: it's like, the ultimate adulting God, get good with money

1100
00:47:31,160 --> 00:47:33,200
Speaker 5: because I walk you through. You hear, the way I

1101
00:47:33,320 --> 00:47:34,759
Speaker 5: talk now is the way I talk in the in

1102
00:47:34,880 --> 00:47:37,520
Speaker 5: the book, Like there's no financial jargon. It's really just

1103
00:47:37,640 --> 00:47:40,520
Speaker 5: walking you through, step by step these ten components of

1104
00:47:40,520 --> 00:47:44,360
Speaker 5: your financial life. It's gonna create the most amazing financial

1105
00:47:44,440 --> 00:47:47,160
Speaker 5: foundation that you can have so when things come, because

1106
00:47:47,160 --> 00:47:49,400
Speaker 5: things aren't gonna come, we're adults, that you will have

1107
00:47:49,520 --> 00:47:52,800
Speaker 5: the strong foundation so you can't be easily shaken. You

1108
00:47:52,920 --> 00:47:55,319
Speaker 5: know that you can weather financial storms, you can weather

1109
00:47:55,440 --> 00:48:00,359
Speaker 5: financial winters, and you can grow this humongous, beautiful financial house.

1110
00:48:00,400 --> 00:48:02,279
Speaker 5: That's what I want for because I speak to women,

1111
00:48:02,320 --> 00:48:04,000
Speaker 5: that's what I want for all women. I want you

1112
00:48:04,040 --> 00:48:06,320
Speaker 5: to understand that you are capable. You might not be

1113
00:48:06,400 --> 00:48:08,840
Speaker 5: confident right now, but I will help you with the confidence,

1114
00:48:08,880 --> 00:48:11,480
Speaker 5: but you are more than capable of achieving your financial goals.

1115
00:48:12,040 --> 00:48:15,000
Speaker 3: I'm so excited to get good with money because I

1116
00:48:15,120 --> 00:48:17,040
Speaker 3: am like pumped, and you know, we talk a lot

1117
00:48:17,080 --> 00:48:21,160
Speaker 3: about manifestation and like, you know, visualizing our goals and like,

1118
00:48:21,360 --> 00:48:24,759
Speaker 3: I personally am always talking about being on a yacht

1119
00:48:26,320 --> 00:48:28,800
Speaker 3: with my friends and like yacht money, yacht money, and

1120
00:48:28,960 --> 00:48:31,160
Speaker 3: I'm not really sure how I'm going to get like

1121
00:48:31,480 --> 00:48:33,720
Speaker 3: knowing how to get there, but don't have the financial steps.

1122
00:48:33,800 --> 00:48:36,520
Speaker 3: But even this conversation has made me really pumped and

1123
00:48:36,600 --> 00:48:39,800
Speaker 3: motivated too, because I do I want to have a

1124
00:48:39,920 --> 00:48:42,239
Speaker 3: net worth of two hundred and fifty million. I do

1125
00:48:42,360 --> 00:48:44,239
Speaker 3: want to have an estate so that when we leave

1126
00:48:44,320 --> 00:48:46,839
Speaker 3: our kids they have you know, we live in the valley.

1127
00:48:46,840 --> 00:48:49,080
Speaker 3: I have a lot of friends who have trust funds

1128
00:48:49,200 --> 00:48:52,560
Speaker 3: and you know, turned eighteen and twenty one and bought

1129
00:48:52,680 --> 00:48:57,640
Speaker 3: homes and you know, we're financially prepared because their parents

1130
00:48:57,680 --> 00:48:59,239
Speaker 3: were preparing them. And I was like, oh, that's white

1131
00:48:59,239 --> 00:49:01,960
Speaker 3: people shit, but it's not, you know, and it's not

1132
00:49:02,239 --> 00:49:05,440
Speaker 3: just what I've seen, and it's just like I've never

1133
00:49:06,239 --> 00:49:09,200
Speaker 3: just seeing that and saying that was so detrimental to

1134
00:49:09,880 --> 00:49:13,080
Speaker 3: what I want long term, and it's really prevented me

1135
00:49:13,280 --> 00:49:16,600
Speaker 3: from digging in, getting a shovel and being like, where

1136
00:49:16,600 --> 00:49:18,960
Speaker 3: are we going to start? So I'm just like and

1137
00:49:19,120 --> 00:49:21,520
Speaker 3: even prior to this month, because we talk about a

1138
00:49:21,560 --> 00:49:24,280
Speaker 3: lot of things and dispelling shame in a lot of areas,

1139
00:49:24,360 --> 00:49:27,200
Speaker 3: but like we don't really talk finances, and like my

1140
00:49:27,320 --> 00:49:31,399
Speaker 3: first introduction to finance was like Susie Orman, this white woman,

1141
00:49:31,480 --> 00:49:34,360
Speaker 3: you know, and I'm just so happy that you're in

1142
00:49:34,840 --> 00:49:37,480
Speaker 3: you're doing this, you're making this, you're making this accessible

1143
00:49:37,640 --> 00:49:41,920
Speaker 3: to us. And because times is changing, baby, and we're about.

1144
00:49:41,600 --> 00:49:43,400
Speaker 1: To be on the personal finance.

1145
00:49:43,480 --> 00:49:46,279
Speaker 3: Oh yes, okay, the budget, Lisa, Okay.

1146
00:49:46,960 --> 00:49:48,520
Speaker 5: And I said I would love to like get like,

1147
00:49:48,640 --> 00:49:51,040
Speaker 5: make sure you you send me your address because I will.

1148
00:49:51,080 --> 00:49:52,960
Speaker 5: I will send you a copy of Giko with money,

1149
00:49:53,000 --> 00:49:55,279
Speaker 5: because I want to see the progress. I want to

1150
00:49:55,320 --> 00:49:58,120
Speaker 5: see y'all rock and roll be cause to me, like

1151
00:49:58,239 --> 00:50:01,239
Speaker 5: you know you, I mean, we are leaders. We're the

1152
00:50:01,280 --> 00:50:03,759
Speaker 5: first teachers and the first leaders in our community. So

1153
00:50:03,960 --> 00:50:06,480
Speaker 5: as you guys work through it, you know, I encourage

1154
00:50:06,520 --> 00:50:08,960
Speaker 5: you to bring your audience along because it's important for

1155
00:50:09,000 --> 00:50:10,480
Speaker 5: people to see that you don't have to be perfect.

1156
00:50:10,600 --> 00:50:12,680
Speaker 5: This is what I love about financial holeness. You don't

1157
00:50:12,680 --> 00:50:13,840
Speaker 5: have to be perfect. You don't have to make a

1158
00:50:13,840 --> 00:50:15,799
Speaker 5: lot of money. It's not about how much money you make.

1159
00:50:15,840 --> 00:50:18,600
Speaker 5: You can achieve all aspects of financial hollness. It doesn't

1160
00:50:18,640 --> 00:50:20,560
Speaker 5: matter what you do for a living, None of those

1161
00:50:20,600 --> 00:50:23,120
Speaker 5: things matter. You can achieve financial hollness as a twenty

1162
00:50:23,160 --> 00:50:25,640
Speaker 5: one year old just graduate in college. You can achieve

1163
00:50:25,680 --> 00:50:29,399
Speaker 5: financial hollness as a doctor making three hundred thousand dollars

1164
00:50:29,440 --> 00:50:31,960
Speaker 5: a year. You can achieve financial hollness as a teacher

1165
00:50:32,280 --> 00:50:33,560
Speaker 5: making fifty thousand.

1166
00:50:33,280 --> 00:50:33,799
Speaker 1: Dollars a year.

1167
00:50:34,320 --> 00:50:38,560
Speaker 5: Because I hate when things are exclusive, right, so meaning

1168
00:50:38,680 --> 00:50:42,040
Speaker 5: then information in particular, so people think like, well, all

1169
00:50:42,080 --> 00:50:44,120
Speaker 5: I have to do is is just strive for financial freedom.

1170
00:50:44,160 --> 00:50:45,440
Speaker 5: I get a pile of money, I don't got to

1171
00:50:45,440 --> 00:50:48,120
Speaker 5: work anymore. Honestly, that's not enough, because guess what I

1172
00:50:48,239 --> 00:50:50,880
Speaker 5: achieved financial freedom. I had gotten myself a pile of

1173
00:50:50,960 --> 00:50:52,800
Speaker 5: money enough to not work anymore, and that was a

1174
00:50:52,880 --> 00:50:55,920
Speaker 5: whole financial mess. My insurance was like, oh girl, we

1175
00:50:56,040 --> 00:50:58,520
Speaker 5: hope don't nobody slip and fall because all your money

1176
00:50:58,560 --> 00:51:01,640
Speaker 5: going right, and like my estate plan was like I

1177
00:51:01,719 --> 00:51:03,600
Speaker 5: hope you want your sister us to be pulling each

1178
00:51:03,600 --> 00:51:06,759
Speaker 5: other's hair out for your money because but where's.

1179
00:51:06,520 --> 00:51:08,600
Speaker 1: Your will cis? And I was like ooh snap.

1180
00:51:08,680 --> 00:51:11,600
Speaker 5: So there were aspects even in my life that were

1181
00:51:11,640 --> 00:51:13,160
Speaker 5: a mess. And that's when that's when the light bulb

1182
00:51:13,239 --> 00:51:16,600
Speaker 5: came on for financial homeness because I thought, oh, financial

1183
00:51:16,680 --> 00:51:19,200
Speaker 5: freedom ain't really where it's at. I mean, it's great

1184
00:51:19,239 --> 00:51:21,600
Speaker 5: to work toward that, but it's not enough that, like

1185
00:51:21,680 --> 00:51:24,560
Speaker 5: you have to holistically take care of your financial life, tiffany,

1186
00:51:24,600 --> 00:51:27,080
Speaker 5: if you're gonna be okay. And so I think that

1187
00:51:27,200 --> 00:51:29,520
Speaker 5: financial freedom is for some people might achieve that, but

1188
00:51:29,640 --> 00:51:30,879
Speaker 5: financial hollness.

1189
00:51:30,760 --> 00:51:33,280
Speaker 1: All people, all women can achieve financial homeness.

1190
00:51:33,280 --> 00:51:35,920
Speaker 2: I almost feel like when you describe this, I'm almost

1191
00:51:35,960 --> 00:51:39,200
Speaker 2: thinking of it as like, you know, not not a diet,

1192
00:51:39,360 --> 00:51:42,080
Speaker 2: but like going on a good like a well eating plan.

1193
00:51:42,239 --> 00:51:44,440
Speaker 2: Like we spend so much time thinking about our you know,

1194
00:51:44,520 --> 00:51:46,440
Speaker 2: our wellness and our bodies will some people do, and

1195
00:51:46,560 --> 00:51:48,440
Speaker 2: we go in and out of taking care of ourselves,

1196
00:51:49,440 --> 00:51:52,360
Speaker 2: but like having the like the wholeness of like, Okay,

1197
00:51:52,560 --> 00:51:53,839
Speaker 2: this is what I need to be healthy.

1198
00:51:53,880 --> 00:51:55,360
Speaker 1: I need to eat these veggies. I need this.

1199
00:51:55,800 --> 00:51:57,759
Speaker 2: Let me analyze, why is my stomach hurt all the time?

1200
00:51:57,840 --> 00:51:57,960
Speaker 4: Oh?

1201
00:51:57,960 --> 00:51:59,560
Speaker 1: Probably because I need to eliminate dairy.

1202
00:51:59,640 --> 00:52:02,960
Speaker 2: I mean why Suddenly it's like equating food to like

1203
00:52:03,160 --> 00:52:04,399
Speaker 2: financial wholeness.

1204
00:52:05,520 --> 00:52:08,399
Speaker 3: Well, like the wholeness of being a balanced human being

1205
00:52:08,480 --> 00:52:11,640
Speaker 3: in general. I can't be really successful at work and

1206
00:52:11,880 --> 00:52:13,919
Speaker 3: just be like this a really you know, great mom

1207
00:52:14,000 --> 00:52:16,360
Speaker 3: and great wife or whatever, and they're a great, like

1208
00:52:16,520 --> 00:52:19,880
Speaker 3: literary person, but I'm also I'm failing in other areas

1209
00:52:19,920 --> 00:52:21,719
Speaker 3: of my life. And if my body doesn't feel good,

1210
00:52:21,719 --> 00:52:24,080
Speaker 3: if my budget isn't good, if my finances are good,

1211
00:52:24,120 --> 00:52:26,560
Speaker 3: if my child's not taken care of, if something happens

1212
00:52:26,600 --> 00:52:29,879
Speaker 3: to me, I've neglected an area of myself and I've

1213
00:52:29,960 --> 00:52:32,920
Speaker 3: not achieved balance. And I think we neglect that so

1214
00:52:33,000 --> 00:52:35,439
Speaker 3: much because we don't hear it this way. But there's

1215
00:52:35,600 --> 00:52:38,000
Speaker 3: there's so many areas of our lives that have to

1216
00:52:38,080 --> 00:52:42,840
Speaker 3: be worked on for us to achieve that ultimate wholeness, especially,

1217
00:52:42,960 --> 00:52:45,040
Speaker 3: and I think it's it's we have a huge responsibility

1218
00:52:45,120 --> 00:52:48,719
Speaker 3: as mothers and as parents because those that this is

1219
00:52:48,760 --> 00:52:54,040
Speaker 3: our opportunity to break generational trauma and cycles and so

1220
00:52:54,480 --> 00:52:56,759
Speaker 3: my daughter won't be like, that's white people shit. No,

1221
00:52:57,000 --> 00:52:59,640
Speaker 3: that's your shit. This is your shit. You know that

1222
00:52:59,840 --> 00:53:02,239
Speaker 3: is so important because it isn't white people shit, it's

1223
00:53:02,320 --> 00:53:05,400
Speaker 3: just people shit. And these are things that are so important.

1224
00:53:05,520 --> 00:53:08,800
Speaker 2: So so i'm so as your accountability partner.

1225
00:53:09,080 --> 00:53:10,400
Speaker 3: Oh now you're okay, Now we're back on.

1226
00:53:11,000 --> 00:53:14,600
Speaker 2: As we're on again, I'm going to encourage you to

1227
00:53:15,160 --> 00:53:17,200
Speaker 2: go through, well we're going to do this in our

1228
00:53:17,520 --> 00:53:19,920
Speaker 2: own business, to go through and like what our costs

1229
00:53:19,960 --> 00:53:23,040
Speaker 2: are exactly right now right, and like what we're bringing in,

1230
00:53:23,440 --> 00:53:26,200
Speaker 2: but also take a step further in your own personal finances.

1231
00:53:26,239 --> 00:53:29,520
Speaker 2: And in mind, we need to go through our bank

1232
00:53:29,600 --> 00:53:32,360
Speaker 2: statement this month, see what we're spending.

1233
00:53:32,480 --> 00:53:36,200
Speaker 3: Let's to the fifty they just pay rent, see, don't

1234
00:53:36,239 --> 00:53:38,560
Speaker 3: avoid I'm.

1235
00:53:37,680 --> 00:53:42,239
Speaker 2: Your accountability partner, and see like just so we like

1236
00:53:42,360 --> 00:53:44,480
Speaker 2: you have a clear and I have a clear.

1237
00:53:44,360 --> 00:53:46,719
Speaker 1: Too, like what exactly am I spending money on?

1238
00:53:47,080 --> 00:53:49,120
Speaker 3: And like I want to take it even up a

1239
00:53:49,239 --> 00:53:53,520
Speaker 3: notch because Tiffany's book came out yesterday, which I'm about

1240
00:53:53,560 --> 00:53:57,279
Speaker 3: to dig into immediately, and I would like for our

1241
00:53:57,360 --> 00:53:59,879
Speaker 3: audience and the people listening, I want you to get

1242
00:53:59,880 --> 00:54:02,000
Speaker 3: the book A and I would really like if we

1243
00:54:02,040 --> 00:54:05,600
Speaker 3: could do be accountability partners on Patreon together. Oh yes,

1244
00:54:06,320 --> 00:54:09,000
Speaker 3: I would really like for us to like really embark

1245
00:54:09,080 --> 00:54:11,680
Speaker 3: on this. I know we've like we had ey l on.

1246
00:54:12,360 --> 00:54:15,640
Speaker 3: They have an academy that me and Erica have registered

1247
00:54:15,719 --> 00:54:17,960
Speaker 3: for and we've we've committed to each other that we

1248
00:54:18,000 --> 00:54:20,719
Speaker 3: can't just be talking this ship and actually not exercising it,

1249
00:54:20,840 --> 00:54:23,719
Speaker 3: or else we'd be like hypocrites. So I really want

1250
00:54:23,800 --> 00:54:28,239
Speaker 3: to encourage everybody listening to purchase Tiffany's book that came

1251
00:54:28,280 --> 00:54:30,760
Speaker 3: out yesterday, and you can go to get Good.

1252
00:54:30,600 --> 00:54:32,480
Speaker 1: With Money dot com. That's where you can purchase it.

1253
00:54:33,400 --> 00:54:35,840
Speaker 3: Awesome, and let's all get good money, get Good with

1254
00:54:35,960 --> 00:54:39,879
Speaker 3: Money together. Let's give them an opportunity to get the book.

1255
00:54:39,960 --> 00:54:42,960
Speaker 3: Let's start April fifteenth. Okay, Oh, which is isn't that

1256
00:54:43,080 --> 00:54:44,920
Speaker 3: like Texas? Yeah, perfect timing.

1257
00:54:45,040 --> 00:54:47,000
Speaker 1: Yes, it's another source of anxiety.

1258
00:54:47,120 --> 00:54:50,040
Speaker 3: Oh but there's no God don't but there's no there's

1259
00:54:50,080 --> 00:54:53,400
Speaker 3: no better time than now, especially because we just watched

1260
00:54:53,440 --> 00:54:55,480
Speaker 3: this year that we all had and like that was

1261
00:54:55,560 --> 00:54:57,879
Speaker 3: the source of my anxiety because I I do work

1262
00:54:57,960 --> 00:55:00,560
Speaker 3: for myself. I don't have like a backup plan, and

1263
00:55:00,640 --> 00:55:04,120
Speaker 3: I'm like I like as was a lot of as

1264
00:55:04,200 --> 00:55:07,080
Speaker 3: were a lot of people. There is fucking panic or

1265
00:55:07,280 --> 00:55:09,320
Speaker 3: do we have toilet paper? Do I have a savings?

1266
00:55:09,480 --> 00:55:10,160
Speaker 3: Do I have gold?

1267
00:55:10,400 --> 00:55:10,440
Speaker 6: No?

1268
00:55:11,120 --> 00:55:11,279
Speaker 1: You know.

1269
00:55:11,600 --> 00:55:14,160
Speaker 3: So it's just like I really want to encourage just

1270
00:55:14,280 --> 00:55:16,879
Speaker 3: like black women and black people and people of color

1271
00:55:16,960 --> 00:55:19,719
Speaker 3: in general to to get on and do this shit

1272
00:55:19,760 --> 00:55:22,240
Speaker 3: because it's a revolution happening.

1273
00:55:22,520 --> 00:55:25,360
Speaker 1: There is a shit happening, a financial revolution.

1274
00:55:25,680 --> 00:55:26,439
Speaker 3: We need's time.

1275
00:55:27,040 --> 00:55:28,640
Speaker 5: We are the ones that are going to save ourselves

1276
00:55:28,680 --> 00:55:30,719
Speaker 5: and we have we have the ability to do so.

1277
00:55:30,920 --> 00:55:33,279
Speaker 5: And so like I'm just really excited about seeing how

1278
00:55:33,360 --> 00:55:35,600
Speaker 5: many of us are like getting on the train. Like

1279
00:55:35,640 --> 00:55:37,600
Speaker 5: I was just talking to So, I have a podcast

1280
00:55:37,680 --> 00:55:41,560
Speaker 5: called Brown Ambition where my podcast partner Mandy, we talk

1281
00:55:41,600 --> 00:55:45,080
Speaker 5: about money, career, and life in this brown skin, and

1282
00:55:45,200 --> 00:55:49,200
Speaker 5: we're just seeing more and more black and brown women

1283
00:55:49,320 --> 00:55:52,000
Speaker 5: mostly like really getting like want and asking because we

1284
00:55:52,239 --> 00:55:54,680
Speaker 5: get we take questions from the audience, and the questions

1285
00:55:54,719 --> 00:55:56,480
Speaker 5: are asking are just so awesome because it shows that

1286
00:55:56,600 --> 00:55:59,879
Speaker 5: like these women are like I'm I'm wanting to do better,

1287
00:56:00,120 --> 00:56:02,200
Speaker 5: I wanted to learn more, Please show me.

1288
00:56:02,560 --> 00:56:04,680
Speaker 1: And so I just honestly it warms with my heart

1289
00:56:04,719 --> 00:56:05,720
Speaker 1: because ten years ago.

1290
00:56:06,000 --> 00:56:08,120
Speaker 5: Like nobody wanted to hear when I started a Budjanista,

1291
00:56:08,400 --> 00:56:10,160
Speaker 5: And so I'm just I love the fact that just

1292
00:56:10,239 --> 00:56:12,839
Speaker 5: how many women are flooding in because it gives me hope.

1293
00:56:12,840 --> 00:56:15,239
Speaker 5: Because if you really want to change a family, you

1294
00:56:15,280 --> 00:56:16,879
Speaker 5: have to change a woman. If you want to change

1295
00:56:16,920 --> 00:56:18,399
Speaker 5: a community, you have to change a woman.

1296
00:56:18,560 --> 00:56:19,000
Speaker 1: If you want to.

1297
00:56:19,000 --> 00:56:20,600
Speaker 5: Change a neighborhood, you have to change a woman. You

1298
00:56:20,640 --> 00:56:22,799
Speaker 5: want to change a nation, you have to change a woman.

1299
00:56:23,040 --> 00:56:25,520
Speaker 5: It's through women all things change and so and all

1300
00:56:25,600 --> 00:56:27,560
Speaker 5: things grow and flow through. So I just thank you

1301
00:56:27,680 --> 00:56:28,600
Speaker 5: ladies for having me on.

1302
00:56:29,280 --> 00:56:32,000
Speaker 1: I can't for you to get good with money and

1303
00:56:32,120 --> 00:56:34,000
Speaker 1: to go get good with money and go get.

1304
00:56:34,520 --> 00:56:37,360
Speaker 3: Yes, I can't wait either. For the first time in

1305
00:56:37,440 --> 00:56:40,839
Speaker 3: my life, I'm feeling pumped and not like anxious as hell.

1306
00:56:41,000 --> 00:56:45,960
Speaker 3: So I'm very excited. I will see you on the yacht. Yes, yes,

1307
00:56:46,400 --> 00:56:48,640
Speaker 3: where would you like to Where would you like to bank?

1308
00:56:48,760 --> 00:56:51,160
Speaker 3: I mean I always wanted to go to.

1309
00:56:51,600 --> 00:56:54,480
Speaker 1: Oh what is that place? It's in Italy. It's like

1310
00:56:54,560 --> 00:56:55,800
Speaker 1: the a Maufi coast.

1311
00:56:56,040 --> 00:56:59,080
Speaker 3: Oh, yes, we will see you in the Maufi coast.

1312
00:56:59,560 --> 00:57:02,600
Speaker 3: We'll have big yacht, we will sail the ocean and

1313
00:57:02,680 --> 00:57:04,080
Speaker 3: it will be amazing and we'll be.

1314
00:57:04,080 --> 00:57:04,440
Speaker 1: Debt for you.

1315
00:57:05,719 --> 00:57:07,880
Speaker 2: Yes, you, guys, so make sure you go follow the

1316
00:57:07,920 --> 00:57:10,360
Speaker 2: budget Nista. We'll leave all of her information in the

1317
00:57:10,840 --> 00:57:13,800
Speaker 2: episode description. Make sure to join our tribe at Patreon

1318
00:57:13,880 --> 00:57:15,160
Speaker 2: because we are going to do this. So if you

1319
00:57:15,239 --> 00:57:17,720
Speaker 2: haven't joined the tribe at Patreon, that's patreon dot com

1320
00:57:17,800 --> 00:57:23,120
Speaker 2: backslash Good Mom's Bad Choices. Thank you, Tiffany. I'm such

1321
00:57:23,200 --> 00:57:24,720
Speaker 2: I've been such a fan for so long. I'm so

1322
00:57:24,840 --> 00:57:27,000
Speaker 2: great grateful that you came on and just gave us

1323
00:57:27,000 --> 00:57:27,600
Speaker 2: all this knowledge.

1324
00:57:27,640 --> 00:57:30,760
Speaker 1: So thank you, thank you and all the all the

1325
00:57:30,840 --> 00:57:35,840
Speaker 1: love and success for your book and and beyond and beyond,

1326
00:57:35,880 --> 00:57:37,320
Speaker 1: and thank you ladies.

1327
00:57:38,280 --> 00:57:39,360
Speaker 2: All Right, I'll take care.

1328
00:57:47,720 --> 00:57:55,000
Speaker 3: M Hey, guys, have you joined Patreon, where we offer

1329
00:57:55,240 --> 00:57:57,440
Speaker 3: even more juicy content.

1330
00:57:57,840 --> 00:57:58,439
Speaker 1: Yes, y'all.

1331
00:57:58,640 --> 00:58:02,720
Speaker 2: We have a secret at theisdes secret segments and some

1332
00:58:03,040 --> 00:58:06,640
Speaker 2: very personal blog posts that we don't share on the interwebs,

1333
00:58:07,480 --> 00:58:09,640
Speaker 2: So make sure you go check out our patreon. That's

1334
00:58:09,680 --> 00:58:13,680
Speaker 2: patreon dot com backslash Good Mom's Bad Choices. Here's a

1335
00:58:13,760 --> 00:58:15,080
Speaker 2: little sneak peak.

1336
00:58:17,080 --> 00:58:20,280
Speaker 7: It's like a time of big of power that's been buried,

1337
00:58:20,440 --> 00:58:23,880
Speaker 7: and so I felt really compelled to start teaching this

1338
00:58:24,040 --> 00:58:26,960
Speaker 7: in my community and explaining the powers that we had

1339
00:58:27,080 --> 00:58:27,720
Speaker 7: during this time.

1340
00:58:27,840 --> 00:58:29,040
Speaker 1: So in when you're.

1341
00:58:28,960 --> 00:58:31,600
Speaker 7: Menstruating, that's the time where you can manifest much more

1342
00:58:31,720 --> 00:58:35,280
Speaker 7: rapidly and be more intentional of what you're doing. If

1343
00:58:35,360 --> 00:58:38,040
Speaker 7: you don't set your intentions while you're you have to

1344
00:58:38,040 --> 00:58:39,600
Speaker 7: set your intentions while you're menstruating.

1345
00:58:40,120 --> 00:58:41,440
Speaker 1: After you menstrate, we enter