1
00:00:00,080 --> 00:00:13,920
Speaker 1: Kay, Welcome to the Therapy for Black Girls Podcast, a

2
00:00:14,000 --> 00:00:18,799
Speaker 1: weekly conversation about mental health, personal development, and all the

3
00:00:18,840 --> 00:00:21,880
Speaker 1: small decisions we can make to become the best possible

4
00:00:22,000 --> 00:00:26,480
Speaker 1: versions of ourselves. I'm your host, Dr Joy hard and Bradford,

5
00:00:26,840 --> 00:00:31,920
Speaker 1: a licensed psychologist in Atlanta, Georgia. For more information or

6
00:00:32,000 --> 00:00:35,400
Speaker 1: to find a therapist in your area, visit our website

7
00:00:35,560 --> 00:00:39,160
Speaker 1: at Therapy for Black Girls dot com. While I hope

8
00:00:39,159 --> 00:00:43,040
Speaker 1: you love listening to and learning from the podcast, it

9
00:00:43,200 --> 00:00:46,080
Speaker 1: is not meant to be a substitute for a relationship

10
00:00:46,159 --> 00:00:57,080
Speaker 1: with a licensed mental health professional. Hey, y'all, thanks so

11
00:00:57,200 --> 00:00:59,640
Speaker 1: much for joining me for session to fourteen of the

12
00:00:59,640 --> 00:01:02,880
Speaker 1: Therapy for Black Girls Podcast. We'll get right into the

13
00:01:02,880 --> 00:01:16,040
Speaker 1: episode after a word from our sponsors. We've gotten a

14
00:01:16,080 --> 00:01:19,440
Speaker 1: few questions in our mailbox recently from community members about

15
00:01:19,480 --> 00:01:22,800
Speaker 1: finding the right therapist to work with, and this is

16
00:01:22,880 --> 00:01:26,880
Speaker 1: really important because research has been consistent in telling us

17
00:01:26,920 --> 00:01:29,800
Speaker 1: that the number one factor that dictates growth and therapy

18
00:01:30,400 --> 00:01:33,720
Speaker 1: is the relationship that we have with our therapists. If

19
00:01:33,760 --> 00:01:38,200
Speaker 1: the relationship is shaky, little else will matter. So it

20
00:01:38,240 --> 00:01:40,440
Speaker 1: makes sense that we want to be as thoughtful as

21
00:01:40,440 --> 00:01:43,800
Speaker 1: possible when deciding on who we're gonna work with. I

22
00:01:43,920 --> 00:01:46,360
Speaker 1: also think it speaks to why it's okay if you

23
00:01:46,400 --> 00:01:49,120
Speaker 1: don't really click with the first therapist you might work with,

24
00:01:49,600 --> 00:01:52,720
Speaker 1: because we know that we just don't jail with everybody.

25
00:01:53,400 --> 00:01:56,360
Speaker 1: Another question that has been asked a few times is

26
00:01:57,080 --> 00:02:00,080
Speaker 1: do I really need a black therapist? And again, and

27
00:02:00,160 --> 00:02:02,840
Speaker 1: I just think that this is an excellent question, and

28
00:02:02,920 --> 00:02:07,080
Speaker 1: it really depends on so many different factors. Now, clearly

29
00:02:07,200 --> 00:02:10,600
Speaker 1: this is the Therapy for Black Girls podcast. I started

30
00:02:10,600 --> 00:02:14,040
Speaker 1: our therapist directory because I saw so many sisters expressing

31
00:02:14,040 --> 00:02:16,800
Speaker 1: a desire to see a black woman therapist. So of

32
00:02:16,800 --> 00:02:19,679
Speaker 1: course I believe in having the option to see a

33
00:02:19,720 --> 00:02:23,480
Speaker 1: black woman therapist if that's what you want and if

34
00:02:23,520 --> 00:02:25,400
Speaker 1: that's what's going to be the best fit for you.

35
00:02:26,200 --> 00:02:28,640
Speaker 1: And I also think we have to be honest about

36
00:02:28,680 --> 00:02:33,280
Speaker 1: the numbers of black therapists that actually exist. So about

37
00:02:33,280 --> 00:02:36,560
Speaker 1: four percent of psychologists are black, about two percent of

38
00:02:36,600 --> 00:02:40,160
Speaker 1: psychiatrists are black. And though I've not seen the stats

39
00:02:40,160 --> 00:02:43,760
Speaker 1: for other clinicians like social workers, marriage and family therapists

40
00:02:43,760 --> 00:02:47,400
Speaker 1: are professional counselors, my guess is that the numbers in

41
00:02:47,440 --> 00:02:51,280
Speaker 1: those areas are small as well. The bottom line is

42
00:02:51,320 --> 00:02:53,440
Speaker 1: that there are still lots of work to be done

43
00:02:53,639 --> 00:02:56,919
Speaker 1: in creating opportunities for more black people to become therapists.

44
00:02:57,600 --> 00:03:00,359
Speaker 1: So there are simply not enough black therapists and meet

45
00:03:00,400 --> 00:03:03,320
Speaker 1: the needs for everybody who might actually want to see

46
00:03:03,320 --> 00:03:07,720
Speaker 1: a black therapist. And additionally, not everyone wants to see

47
00:03:07,720 --> 00:03:12,040
Speaker 1: a black therapist, which is also fine. For example, I've

48
00:03:12,080 --> 00:03:14,680
Speaker 1: had people talk with me about really wanting to see

49
00:03:14,720 --> 00:03:17,920
Speaker 1: a black woman therapist, but being concerned that they wouldn't

50
00:03:17,919 --> 00:03:20,720
Speaker 1: really be able to be vulnerable in that space because

51
00:03:20,720 --> 00:03:22,720
Speaker 1: they didn't want to fall apart in front of someone

52
00:03:22,800 --> 00:03:25,760
Speaker 1: who seemed like they had it all together. They are

53
00:03:25,800 --> 00:03:28,560
Speaker 1: really just so many different dynamics that are in play

54
00:03:28,720 --> 00:03:31,760
Speaker 1: when you're talking about the relationship with the therapist, and

55
00:03:31,800 --> 00:03:34,840
Speaker 1: they're all gonna be as unique as each of us is.

56
00:03:36,480 --> 00:03:39,280
Speaker 1: But when it comes down to it, you want to

57
00:03:39,320 --> 00:03:42,000
Speaker 1: find a therapist who will create a space comfortable for

58
00:03:42,040 --> 00:03:46,280
Speaker 1: you to share, who will challenge and support you, someone

59
00:03:46,360 --> 00:03:49,000
Speaker 1: who offers you perspectives that you might not have considered

60
00:03:49,600 --> 00:03:52,440
Speaker 1: and teaches you things about how to manage your emotional

61
00:03:52,480 --> 00:03:56,200
Speaker 1: life that you didn't know before. With that said, though,

62
00:03:56,440 --> 00:03:58,400
Speaker 1: I do want to offer you some things to consider

63
00:03:58,520 --> 00:04:00,880
Speaker 1: to help you find someone who's gonna be a great

64
00:04:00,920 --> 00:04:03,760
Speaker 1: fit for you. First, I want you to make a

65
00:04:03,800 --> 00:04:06,840
Speaker 1: list of things that are must has for you, and

66
00:04:06,880 --> 00:04:11,480
Speaker 1: these can be anything for any reason. Absolutely anything that

67
00:04:11,560 --> 00:04:14,640
Speaker 1: you deem important to you in working with a therapist

68
00:04:15,160 --> 00:04:19,120
Speaker 1: is completely fine to search for. For some people, it's

69
00:04:19,120 --> 00:04:22,560
Speaker 1: important to have imagined terms of culture. For other people,

70
00:04:22,640 --> 00:04:25,120
Speaker 1: it might be important to have imagined terms of age

71
00:04:25,240 --> 00:04:28,520
Speaker 1: or religion. Whatever it is for you, it's okay to

72
00:04:28,600 --> 00:04:31,239
Speaker 1: have that on your list. So when you think about

73
00:04:31,279 --> 00:04:33,640
Speaker 1: the people who feel most comfortable for you to talk to,

74
00:04:34,360 --> 00:04:37,839
Speaker 1: what comes up for you? What kinds of characteristics do

75
00:04:37,920 --> 00:04:41,279
Speaker 1: they possess, What kinds of people are settings help you

76
00:04:41,320 --> 00:04:44,880
Speaker 1: to feel safest and most comfortable. All of these answers

77
00:04:44,920 --> 00:04:47,560
Speaker 1: will give you a good indication of who might be

78
00:04:47,600 --> 00:04:51,320
Speaker 1: a good fit for you. In addition to these things,

79
00:04:51,960 --> 00:04:54,720
Speaker 1: you also want to consider what's a fit for you

80
00:04:54,800 --> 00:04:58,039
Speaker 1: in terms of your budget. Are you gonna be using

81
00:04:58,120 --> 00:05:02,240
Speaker 1: health insurance benefits are paying out of pocket? If you're

82
00:05:02,240 --> 00:05:05,039
Speaker 1: planning to use your health insurance, then a good place

83
00:05:05,080 --> 00:05:07,240
Speaker 1: to start would be to get a list of providers

84
00:05:07,240 --> 00:05:10,520
Speaker 1: in your area from your insurance company. And usually you

85
00:05:10,560 --> 00:05:13,040
Speaker 1: can find this in your benefits portal are on the

86
00:05:13,080 --> 00:05:17,440
Speaker 1: insurance company's website, and then narrow down that list based

87
00:05:17,480 --> 00:05:19,680
Speaker 1: on the other things that you said are important to you.

88
00:05:21,240 --> 00:05:24,960
Speaker 1: If you're not using insurance, then when you're searching, you'll

89
00:05:25,000 --> 00:05:27,240
Speaker 1: want to look for therapists whose rates are within your

90
00:05:27,240 --> 00:05:31,560
Speaker 1: budget are considered Therapists who offer a sliding scale, which

91
00:05:31,640 --> 00:05:34,480
Speaker 1: means the amount of pay maybe dependent on your income,

92
00:05:35,080 --> 00:05:37,599
Speaker 1: or perhaps they'll have a reduced rate they offer to

93
00:05:37,680 --> 00:05:40,440
Speaker 1: a few of their clients. Once you've got an idea

94
00:05:40,440 --> 00:05:43,360
Speaker 1: of your must haves and your budget, the next thing

95
00:05:43,400 --> 00:05:47,440
Speaker 1: you want to do is research therapist specialty areas. Now,

96
00:05:47,480 --> 00:05:50,640
Speaker 1: there are general things that we all learn as therapists,

97
00:05:51,160 --> 00:05:53,599
Speaker 1: but many of us go on to specialize in helping

98
00:05:53,640 --> 00:05:59,440
Speaker 1: certain communities, are certain concerns. For example, some therapists specialized

99
00:05:59,480 --> 00:06:03,159
Speaker 1: in working with couples and families, some specialized in working

100
00:06:03,160 --> 00:06:07,560
Speaker 1: with activists, some specialized in working with new moms, and

101
00:06:07,600 --> 00:06:11,360
Speaker 1: other therapists specialize in things like people struggling with anxiety.

102
00:06:11,839 --> 00:06:15,640
Speaker 1: They're literally endless ways to structure our practices. So it's

103
00:06:15,680 --> 00:06:17,919
Speaker 1: important for you to do your research to find a

104
00:06:17,960 --> 00:06:20,000
Speaker 1: therapist who's going to be a good match for you.

105
00:06:20,040 --> 00:06:23,000
Speaker 1: In terms of expertise. You can typically get a sense

106
00:06:23,040 --> 00:06:25,839
Speaker 1: of this from their profiles and the therapist directory, but

107
00:06:25,960 --> 00:06:29,360
Speaker 1: to dig even deeper, make sure to check out their websites,

108
00:06:29,520 --> 00:06:32,360
Speaker 1: where they typically go more in depth about who they are,

109
00:06:33,120 --> 00:06:36,359
Speaker 1: their training, and what kinds of clients they specialize in

110
00:06:36,400 --> 00:06:39,359
Speaker 1: working with. Someone even have a video you can watch

111
00:06:39,440 --> 00:06:42,480
Speaker 1: to get a better sense of their personality. I'd also

112
00:06:42,560 --> 00:06:44,640
Speaker 1: encourage you to check and see if they're active on

113
00:06:44,720 --> 00:06:47,800
Speaker 1: social media. You can typically get a good sense of

114
00:06:47,800 --> 00:06:50,599
Speaker 1: what clients they work with by what they share on

115
00:06:50,680 --> 00:06:54,560
Speaker 1: social media. And all of this research is important because

116
00:06:54,600 --> 00:06:58,359
Speaker 1: you may love a therapist personality on social media and

117
00:06:58,440 --> 00:07:01,760
Speaker 1: think that they're really cool, but if they don't specialize

118
00:07:01,800 --> 00:07:04,599
Speaker 1: in the concerns that are bringing you to therapy, it

119
00:07:04,760 --> 00:07:08,400
Speaker 1: might not actually be helpful for you. After you've done

120
00:07:08,400 --> 00:07:11,520
Speaker 1: your research and narrow down your list, the next step

121
00:07:11,520 --> 00:07:15,200
Speaker 1: would likely be a ten to fifteen minute consultation with

122
00:07:15,240 --> 00:07:18,680
Speaker 1: the therapists, and usually these are free. This is an

123
00:07:18,720 --> 00:07:22,080
Speaker 1: opportunity for you to ask any lingering questions that haven't

124
00:07:22,120 --> 00:07:25,240
Speaker 1: been answered during your research. Here are a few questions

125
00:07:25,280 --> 00:07:28,840
Speaker 1: you might want to add to your list. Number one,

126
00:07:29,280 --> 00:07:34,200
Speaker 1: how often do you work with clients presenting with my concern? Two?

127
00:07:35,040 --> 00:07:40,080
Speaker 1: Have you had specialized training in this area? Three? Do

128
00:07:40,160 --> 00:07:43,240
Speaker 1: you have the capacity to take on weekly clients right now?

129
00:07:44,000 --> 00:07:46,520
Speaker 1: And this might be important because if you're somebody who

130
00:07:46,560 --> 00:07:49,120
Speaker 1: knows that you want to have a weekly cadence to

131
00:07:49,240 --> 00:07:51,720
Speaker 1: your therapy sessions, you want to know this on the

132
00:07:51,760 --> 00:07:53,960
Speaker 1: front end, because if they only have the space for

133
00:07:54,280 --> 00:07:57,000
Speaker 1: bi weekly clients, then that may not be a good

134
00:07:57,000 --> 00:08:01,840
Speaker 1: therapist fit for you. No be Four do you have

135
00:08:01,920 --> 00:08:06,720
Speaker 1: a large case load of culturally diverse clients? Number five?

136
00:08:07,400 --> 00:08:11,760
Speaker 1: How comfortable are you with talking about issues of race, ethnicity,

137
00:08:12,120 --> 00:08:17,640
Speaker 1: oppression or privilege? And six what kind of work have

138
00:08:17,760 --> 00:08:20,280
Speaker 1: you done to ensure this is a safe space for

139
00:08:20,320 --> 00:08:25,480
Speaker 1: black people. The consultation is also an opportunity for your

140
00:08:25,520 --> 00:08:28,360
Speaker 1: therapist to hear a little about you and to make

141
00:08:28,400 --> 00:08:30,840
Speaker 1: a determination about whether they think they'd be a good

142
00:08:30,920 --> 00:08:34,360
Speaker 1: match as your therapist. If a therapist feels like their

143
00:08:34,440 --> 00:08:37,800
Speaker 1: area of expertise doesn't match what you might need, it's

144
00:08:37,800 --> 00:08:39,880
Speaker 1: important to let you know that on the front end

145
00:08:40,200 --> 00:08:43,240
Speaker 1: and offer recommendations to colleagues who might be a better

146
00:08:43,280 --> 00:08:46,160
Speaker 1: fit for you. More tips on finding a great therapist

147
00:08:46,240 --> 00:08:58,080
Speaker 1: after the break something else that may assist you in

148
00:08:58,160 --> 00:09:01,280
Speaker 1: finding a great therapist for you is asking for referrals

149
00:09:01,320 --> 00:09:06,120
Speaker 1: from friends, family, or colleagues. Just like we trust hairstylists

150
00:09:06,160 --> 00:09:09,440
Speaker 1: and nail technicians when our girls recommend them, I think

151
00:09:09,480 --> 00:09:12,720
Speaker 1: this can be important in therapy as well. My current

152
00:09:12,760 --> 00:09:15,240
Speaker 1: therapist is a black woman therapist who I found through

153
00:09:15,240 --> 00:09:18,760
Speaker 1: a referral from a friend, and my previous two therapists

154
00:09:18,760 --> 00:09:21,360
Speaker 1: were a white woman and a Latina woman who I

155
00:09:21,480 --> 00:09:24,280
Speaker 1: also started working with because a friend or a colleague

156
00:09:24,280 --> 00:09:27,280
Speaker 1: referred me to them. So if you feel comfortable asking

157
00:09:27,320 --> 00:09:30,280
Speaker 1: others who shared about therapy who they've seen, and they

158
00:09:30,320 --> 00:09:33,360
Speaker 1: feel comfortable sharing that information, this might be a great

159
00:09:33,360 --> 00:09:35,079
Speaker 1: way for you to find a therapist who might be

160
00:09:35,160 --> 00:09:38,000
Speaker 1: a good fit for you as well. And once you've

161
00:09:38,040 --> 00:09:40,400
Speaker 1: found the therapist you think is gonna be a good fit,

162
00:09:41,040 --> 00:09:44,840
Speaker 1: give yourself some time to ease into the relationship. There is,

163
00:09:44,880 --> 00:09:47,800
Speaker 1: of course no formula for how many sessions you need

164
00:09:47,840 --> 00:09:49,720
Speaker 1: to decide whether a therapist is going to be a

165
00:09:49,760 --> 00:09:52,480
Speaker 1: good fit, but I think that within the first three

166
00:09:52,480 --> 00:09:55,200
Speaker 1: to four sessions you can tell if this is a

167
00:09:55,240 --> 00:09:57,840
Speaker 1: person you can grow to feel comfortable sharing more with,

168
00:09:58,600 --> 00:10:01,600
Speaker 1: whether you feel listened to whether it feels like they

169
00:10:01,679 --> 00:10:05,400
Speaker 1: get you again. You may not be ready to share everything,

170
00:10:05,720 --> 00:10:09,080
Speaker 1: and that's totally appropriate, but I think four sessions is

171
00:10:09,200 --> 00:10:11,559
Speaker 1: enough time to know whether this is someone that's gonna

172
00:10:11,600 --> 00:10:14,719
Speaker 1: be a good fit for you or not. And sometimes

173
00:10:15,000 --> 00:10:20,080
Speaker 1: you'll know even before then. With this relationship, like any relationship,

174
00:10:20,559 --> 00:10:23,080
Speaker 1: it's important to listen to what your body is telling you.

175
00:10:23,600 --> 00:10:26,920
Speaker 1: If something feels off, talk with the therapist about it

176
00:10:26,960 --> 00:10:29,760
Speaker 1: to see if it can be addressed and resolved. But

177
00:10:29,800 --> 00:10:33,160
Speaker 1: if after that conversation it still doesn't feel right, it's

178
00:10:33,200 --> 00:10:36,719
Speaker 1: okay to search for someone else. And I know that

179
00:10:36,720 --> 00:10:39,320
Speaker 1: that process can be frustrating. It can be hard to

180
00:10:39,320 --> 00:10:42,240
Speaker 1: start all over, but it really does make all the

181
00:10:42,280 --> 00:10:44,920
Speaker 1: difference when you start working with a therapist who you

182
00:10:44,960 --> 00:10:48,520
Speaker 1: feel like really gets you. And because I know the

183
00:10:48,559 --> 00:10:51,280
Speaker 1: process of keeping track of which therapist you called and

184
00:10:51,320 --> 00:10:53,520
Speaker 1: which ones you liked when you're starting this search can

185
00:10:53,559 --> 00:10:57,000
Speaker 1: be taxing, we've created a handy guide to getting Started

186
00:10:57,000 --> 00:10:59,920
Speaker 1: with therapy for you to track the therapist you've kind

187
00:11:00,040 --> 00:11:02,560
Speaker 1: acted and to provide a space for you to reflect

188
00:11:02,600 --> 00:11:04,800
Speaker 1: on how you're feeling and what you need as you

189
00:11:04,840 --> 00:11:08,040
Speaker 1: start the process. You can grab it at Therapy for

190
00:11:08,080 --> 00:11:12,760
Speaker 1: Black Girls dot com slash g t G s Now,

191
00:11:12,800 --> 00:11:15,760
Speaker 1: it's time for you to weigh in. How did you

192
00:11:15,800 --> 00:11:17,800
Speaker 1: know your therapist was going to be a good fit

193
00:11:17,840 --> 00:11:21,800
Speaker 1: for you? Or did you initially set out to find

194
00:11:21,800 --> 00:11:24,720
Speaker 1: a certain kind of therapists and have been pleasantly surprised

195
00:11:24,720 --> 00:11:27,640
Speaker 1: with who you ended up working with? Share with us

196
00:11:27,760 --> 00:11:31,319
Speaker 1: if you feel comfortable, use the hashtag tv G in

197
00:11:31,360 --> 00:11:34,480
Speaker 1: session to share your thoughts or to respond to others.

198
00:11:35,240 --> 00:11:37,319
Speaker 1: And don't forget to text two of your girls right

199
00:11:37,320 --> 00:11:40,120
Speaker 1: now and tell them to check out the episode as well.

200
00:11:41,080 --> 00:11:43,360
Speaker 1: If you're looking for a therapist and you're brand new

201
00:11:43,400 --> 00:11:46,040
Speaker 1: in your search, be sure to check out our therapist

202
00:11:46,120 --> 00:11:50,160
Speaker 1: directory at Therapy for Black Girls dot com slash directory.

203
00:11:50,280 --> 00:11:52,640
Speaker 1: And if you want to continue digging into this topic

204
00:11:52,880 --> 00:11:55,760
Speaker 1: or just be in community with other sisters, come on

205
00:11:55,840 --> 00:11:58,319
Speaker 1: over and join us in the sister Circle. It's our

206
00:11:58,360 --> 00:12:01,120
Speaker 1: cozy corner of the internet does on just for black women.

207
00:12:01,760 --> 00:12:04,400
Speaker 1: You can join us at community dot Therapy for Black

208
00:12:04,440 --> 00:12:07,520
Speaker 1: Girls dot com. Thank you all so much for joining

209
00:12:07,520 --> 00:12:10,360
Speaker 1: me again this week. I look forward to continuing this

210
00:12:10,440 --> 00:12:14,000
Speaker 1: conversation with you all real soon. Take good care,