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Speaker 1: This episode is brought to you by Shopify. Forget the

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Speaker 1: Sign up today for your one dollar per month trial

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Speaker 1: period at shopify dot com slash tech all lowercase that's

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Speaker 1: Shopify dot com slash tech. I listened to the Black

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Speaker 1: Guy Who Tips podcast because Rod and Karen are hot.

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Speaker 2: Hey, welcome to another episode of the Blackout Tis podcast.

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Speaker 2: I'm your host Rod, joined us always by my co

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Speaker 2: host Karen, and we're live on a Tuesday, A very

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Speaker 2: special tuesday for me.

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Speaker 3: M hmm.

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Speaker 2: It is the day before my birthday. Yes it is,

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Speaker 2: but I already bought my birthday present for myself. I

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Speaker 2: woke up and got an Xbox, like a Xbox Series S.

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Speaker 2: I reserved it because I know my dick is good, okay,

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Speaker 2: And that's what I hear out here on Twitter is

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Speaker 2: that if you're having if you're having an appropriate amount

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Speaker 2: of sex, and it's good enough that you will be

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Speaker 2: bought in Xbox. But I'm like, I, you know, I

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Speaker 2: believe in myself, so I'm just gonna take care of

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Speaker 2: it on my own. It's also a very special day

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Speaker 2: because we have a very special guest friend of the show.

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Speaker 2: He's been on quite a few times. He's actually it

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Speaker 2: was a long time. It was on a few times,

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Speaker 2: and then it was a long time, betweenty times, and

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Speaker 2: then he was on this year and it was like,

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Speaker 2: anytime you want to come back, you just let us know. Mike, Okay,

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Speaker 2: don't be a stranger. And you know what, he's not

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Speaker 2: being a stranger. It's Mike Kaplan, whose album Aka has

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Speaker 2: been submitted for a Grammy nomination.

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Speaker 3: Thank you, thank you, thank you.

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Speaker 4: It's an honor merely to be submitted, to be considered

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Speaker 4: to be nominated.

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Speaker 5: So thank you.

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Speaker 3: La forgetting right too.

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Speaker 4: I've been telling you know, I've been spreading the word

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Speaker 4: to hopefully reach eventually the ears. Have the album reached

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Speaker 4: the ears of the Grammy voters, the Recording Academy. If

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Speaker 4: you are one, thank you for considering. If you're not one,

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Speaker 4: thanks for telling them. And if you don't know any

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Speaker 4: of them, thanks for telling everyone.

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Speaker 3: But I've been I've been telling.

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Speaker 4: Everyone and my dad passed along the message to my

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Speaker 4: uncle and aunt and I got a text from them.

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Speaker 4: They're like, You've been nominated for an Emmy and I

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Speaker 4: was like, uh, not exactly on two counts, but uh,

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Speaker 4: I have. I am creating a new award as well,

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Speaker 4: called the Grammys, which seems like it's a combination, but

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Speaker 4: you just get it for watching the movie Gremlins.

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Speaker 3: Anyone can get a Grammy if they want to.

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Speaker 4: I have done and get a Grammy. Oh yeah, yeah,

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Speaker 4: Grammy's too, you can get multiple for every time.

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Speaker 2: Uh.

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Speaker 4: And a buddy of mine, Alex Hooper, is a fun

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Speaker 4: comedian who when I was helping spread I was like,

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Speaker 4: would you mind helping spread the word?

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Speaker 3: He's like, yes, I want to get.

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Speaker 4: You one of those shiny, shiny metal objects, one of

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Speaker 4: those shiny metal trophies. And I was like, they should

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Speaker 4: all just be called the Shinies. So I'm just trying

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Speaker 4: to get a shiny you know.

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Speaker 2: Well, I hope you get it. I mean, obviously I

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Speaker 2: hope you get nominated, and then I hope you get it.

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Speaker 3: Thank you.

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Speaker 6: And what is that problem? Do you know what that

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Speaker 6: process is?

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Speaker 2: Like? Like, what the next step in the process would

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Speaker 2: be or wouldn't you.

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Speaker 4: I can tell you what I know, which is that

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Speaker 4: right now, the first round of voting, like submissions happened

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Speaker 4: earlier in the year, and uh, I think, you know,

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Speaker 4: I've never done it before, but I don't know if

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Speaker 4: I probably could have, But this year is the first

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Speaker 4: year that I have an album that I'm like, this is.

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Speaker 3: Representative of like.

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Speaker 4: What I what I want to be doing in comedy

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Speaker 4: in the world the most right now. And I think,

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Speaker 4: you know, if I just care about having made it

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Speaker 4: and if it can also if this can help more

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Speaker 4: people hear it and share about it, then.

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Speaker 3: I'll also Except I don't know if there's like.

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Speaker 2: A cash president.

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Speaker 4: As I understand it, the first round of voting starts

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Speaker 4: September thirtieth, which is next week, and goes through for

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Speaker 4: like maybe two weeks or something, and then there's another

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Speaker 4: round maybe a month or a couple months later. And

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Speaker 4: I don't know how many rounds there are, but I'm

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Speaker 4: focused on right now leading up to the first round,

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Speaker 4: which I know about. And yeah, so just trying to

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Speaker 4: trying to let everyone know with various hashtags and yelling

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Speaker 4: in their ears.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, it's really weird, Like Awards in general, you know,

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Speaker 2: just the idea of them, because it's like, you made

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Speaker 2: this art, and you made it to the best of

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Speaker 2: your ability. It may even be your best work, which

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Speaker 2: is already like you know, something to be proud of, yes,

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Speaker 2: and then to turn around be like, but it's also

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Speaker 2: better than your work and better than your work, and

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Speaker 2: your best work was okay, but it wasn't as good

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Speaker 2: as my best work.

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Speaker 4: There's yeah, there's a I think it's a childish Gambino

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Speaker 4: lyric that's something like, you're just mad because I'm doing

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Speaker 4: me better.

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Speaker 3: Than your doing you.

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Speaker 2: Yes, yes, that's it.

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Speaker 4: And we can all obviously, like inherent in that messages

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Speaker 4: we can all do ourselves. I don't know if that's

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Speaker 4: the correct conjugation of that, but we can all do

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Speaker 4: us the best that we can individually. And then at

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Speaker 4: a certain point, like when I was on America's Got Talent,

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Speaker 4: I wrote a joke about how weird it is just

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Speaker 4: that you know, the best, the best comedians are going

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Speaker 4: up against the best circus performers and dogs and children rapping,

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Speaker 4: and like it's like which one of these, you know, like,

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Speaker 4: is the greatest meal tastier.

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Speaker 3: Than the best jazz album is jazzy.

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Speaker 4: Like it doesn't make it doesn't make sense, and so

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Speaker 4: it's all bonus. Like it's not to say I think

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Speaker 4: it's only about you know, it's only about winning.

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Speaker 3: It's not about losing.

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Speaker 4: It's only about like it's celebrating, celebrating like when people

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Speaker 4: have achieved things. It really truly is not only just

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Speaker 4: an honor to be nominated or considered for it or

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Speaker 4: submitted to it, but like just to even get to

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Speaker 4: do anything, to get to be to create art, to

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Speaker 4: create comedy, to create music, to enjoy, to create a

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Speaker 4: podcast that you love doing that people enjoy watching and

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Speaker 4: listening to.

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Speaker 3: Can I say a quick thing about your shirt? Also

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Speaker 3: your Outcast shirt, which I love so And this is

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Speaker 3: sort of I'm gonna in advance.

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Speaker 4: It's going to be kind of about celebrating a fun

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Speaker 4: thing that I said, but seen through the eyes of

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Speaker 4: a friend of mine named Joe Karg who lives in Atlanta.

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Speaker 4: And one day several years ago, was walking through a

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Speaker 4: park in Atlanta and ran into Andre three thousand and

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Speaker 4: was like, oh my god. And they talked for I

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Speaker 4: don't know how long, but they had like a substantial

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Speaker 4: conversation just and he told me, and my friend Joe

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Speaker 4: told me about this, and he's like, wow, like it

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Speaker 4: was just so he said, what if, man, imagine if

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Speaker 4: I had gone to a different park that day and

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Speaker 4: Joe was talking to me the other Day's like and

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Speaker 4: he reminded me that he said that, and that what

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Speaker 4: I said back to him was, yeah, imagine who you

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Speaker 4: would have met in that park, you know. And then

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Speaker 4: he said to me, He's like, man, I guess you're right.

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Speaker 4: If you're looking for Andre three thousands, you're gonna find

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Speaker 4: Andre three thousands. And I'm like, maybe at the other

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Speaker 4: park you would have met Andre four.

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Speaker 2: Thousand, Andre Infinity? Yes, is he out at the park

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Speaker 2: down the street? You just didn't even know?

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Speaker 4: Why are you limiting yourself?

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Speaker 3: You know? Numeracles?

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Speaker 2: Yeah, it's funny too because Andre, I don't know if

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Speaker 2: he still does, but I know I having on very

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Speaker 2: good authority. He used to listen to our show. So

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Speaker 2: it's like such a small world because it's like, he's

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Speaker 2: one of my favorite rappers, if not my favorite. So

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Speaker 2: then it's like like then, I like that's when this

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Speaker 2: kind of thing that we do became real to me,

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Speaker 2: because it was like shit, people could hear this, and

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Speaker 2: we don't know who could hear this, or what they

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Speaker 2: think about it, or any of this stuff. We're just

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Speaker 2: kind of putting itself, putting it out there. And it

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Speaker 2: freaked me out at first, but then after a while,

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Speaker 2: I just became comfortable being like, but this is who

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Speaker 2: we are, and I'm comfortable in who we are, and

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Speaker 2: I feel like this is what's representative of us at

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Speaker 2: the moment and the next moment and all that stuff.

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Speaker 2: So like it kind of became like, you know, it

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Speaker 2: became like a thing that went from like kind of

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Speaker 2: a scary idea to not And it makes me think

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Speaker 2: about the award stuff, like with the Grammys and the

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Speaker 2: Emmys and stuff. How you're right, you it's your perception.

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Speaker 2: So the perception is this is all gravy. So you know,

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Speaker 2: I made a great album. I love it, you know,

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Speaker 2: cause that's step one, right. It could have been like

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Speaker 2: you could have made the album and been like, oh,

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Speaker 2: this was not my best word at all, so boom,

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Speaker 2: that's that's a positive thing. Then it's like, oh other

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Speaker 2: people like it, okay, Oh the people who made the

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Speaker 2: album with me think it's good enough that we should

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Speaker 2: submit it for an award, if you know, Like that's

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Speaker 2: another positive, and it is weird that we perceive the

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Speaker 2: negative and the thing that really was never promised anyway.

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Speaker 2: So it's like, oh, you didn't win the Grammy. It's

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Speaker 2: like there were twenty seven steps. I didn't think it happened,

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Speaker 2: and I made it to twenty six. So whatever, like

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Speaker 2: to be here.

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Speaker 7: You know, because sometimes me and Roger, we depending on

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Speaker 7: the situation, we're just happy.

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Speaker 5: To be in a room.

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Speaker 7: So we always look at every situation as something positive, right,

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Speaker 7: and what can.

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Speaker 5: We get out of it?

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Speaker 7: And we've been a situation where other people around us

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Speaker 7: would be upset and we'd be like, we're just happy

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Speaker 7: we're in the room. We're just happy to be here.

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Speaker 7: I'm having a ball. I got to travel. I didn't

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Speaker 7: have to pay for it, like I have complain.

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Speaker 2: I remember we went to a festival one time for

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Speaker 2: a podcast and we were like, in my opinion, the

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Speaker 2: little podcast that could there right like everybody else was

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Speaker 2: some of these podcasts like they had people coming like

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Speaker 2: dressed up as like a fantasy role playing character. Yes,

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Speaker 2: like they like they were intense, you know what I mean,

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Speaker 2: Like and we a lot of those people what we

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Speaker 2: do and what those other shows do completely different. There

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Speaker 2: was a like y'all made the podcast about like I

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Speaker 2: think it's how Sleep with Me or something where like

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Speaker 2: he helps you go to sleep every night.

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Speaker 5: It's a huge and.

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Speaker 2: People were showing up in pajamas and all like it

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Speaker 2: was just so I was just like, look at these

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Speaker 2: people and you know, like filling up rooms and stuff.

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Speaker 2: And then we had probably like thirty forty people that

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Speaker 2: came just to see us, and we were just like excited, like,

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Speaker 2: oh my god, thirty forty people to see us. And

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Speaker 2: I remember talking to another podcaster and he was kind

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Speaker 2: of like, man, you know, they should have put y'all

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Speaker 2: in this other room and y'all should have been a

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Speaker 2: part of this show, and y'all should have done that.

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Speaker 6: And I was like, I'm gonna be honest, I wasn't even.

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Speaker 2: Thinking about that shit. Like I did not even care

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Speaker 2: because I had so much more fun just concentrating on

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Speaker 2: the positive aspects of what we're doing. And maybe because

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Speaker 2: I do have a little bit of a centical attitude,

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Speaker 2: I was more like thinking what could go wrong, and

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Speaker 2: then nothing was going wrong. Everything was going right. It

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Speaker 2: was like, oh, we met new people new. People liked us,

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Speaker 2: We liked them. You know, people were bringing us gifts

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Speaker 2: and shit, like.

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Speaker 3: It was crazy.

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Speaker 7: And I think that's what made the whole process not

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Speaker 7: so draining, and it made the whole process just a

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Speaker 7: better experience. And I think if more people had that attitude,

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Speaker 7: it will make life just easier to navigate and just

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Speaker 7: make it more happier for you, regardless of the outcome.

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Speaker 7: Because I ended up meeting another podcaster that I interviewed

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Speaker 7: years ago, and they remembered me and they showed up

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Speaker 7: because they were on the panel too, And I was like,

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Speaker 7: who would have thought that I would have met another

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Speaker 7: podcaster one thousand miles away from.

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Speaker 2: Home, And he ended up making a lot of new fans, yes,

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Speaker 2: who were there because they were fantasy role playing and shit,

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Speaker 2: and they're like, let me just stop in and see

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Speaker 2: what these guys are talking about.

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Speaker 6: Oh, they're pretty funny, and some of them still listen

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Speaker 6: to this day.

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Speaker 2: So like, it's just interesting how like you can choose

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Speaker 2: to take the positive from experience or you can kind

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Speaker 2: of like choose to concentrate on the what you perceive

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Speaker 2: as a negative from the experience. And I think that's

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Speaker 2: kind of the thing like I think Mike when I

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Speaker 2: when I think of Mike and his feed on Twitter

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Speaker 2: on always like how does he stay so positive? Like yes,

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Speaker 2: it is like is it a constant like work that

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Speaker 2: you're working at or is it just like your default mood?

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Speaker 6: Like how do how do you do that?

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Speaker 2: Or is it just like you know, this is why

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Speaker 2: I choose to share with you as a positive and

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Speaker 2: then some days I just don't share.

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Speaker 3: That's a great question, I hear an echo.

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Speaker 2: Now, oh oh, sometimes it does that when we've talked

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Speaker 2: a lot and then the other person starts to talk,

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Speaker 2: it normally goes away.

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Speaker 3: Okay, okay, uh so great question. We got one comment.

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Speaker 4: Suggesting the answer is mushrooms, and that is certainly a

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Speaker 4: part of it. But first of all, I love everything

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Speaker 4: that you just said. I feel like, I mean, one

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Speaker 4: of the reasons it's so like wonderful and like warm

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Speaker 4: to talk to you. It's like this game recognize game,

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Speaker 4: you know, Like there's a thing that Ramdas said once

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Speaker 4: about how you know everybody's going through life, you know,

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Speaker 4: kind of being themselves doing their own thing, and like

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Speaker 4: every once in a while you might catch a glimpse

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Speaker 4: of someone who is just at home, and you're like, oh,

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Speaker 4: like at home in what they're doing and who they are,

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Speaker 4: perhaps in their career and their art and their work,

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Speaker 4: and it might not be that. Maybe there's some enlightened beings,

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Speaker 4: some divinely enlightened beings that are like that all the time,

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Speaker 4: like Buddha type folks, Jesus type folks. And then there's

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Speaker 4: some of us who you know aren't necessarily in that

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Speaker 4: place all the time, but perhaps you know, maybe under

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Speaker 4: the influence of a psychedelic or maybe under the influence

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Speaker 4: of meditation, or just you know, with the gratitude that

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Speaker 4: you have had for you know, the experiences that you've had,

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Speaker 4: the partner or partners that you have, you know, the

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Speaker 4: love in your life, your family, your friends, if you've

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Speaker 4: had a moment of joy or bliss or flow or

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Speaker 4: creative realization where if something has ever gone right for

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Speaker 4: you and you can remember that like that, knowing that,

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Speaker 4: and then you know, if not not chasing that, but

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Speaker 4: being aware that that is possible, being grateful for that

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Speaker 4: can be a thing that helps helps me build up.

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Speaker 3: Like I don't wake up every morning like here we go,

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Speaker 3: Like often I wake up like with a swarming storm.

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Speaker 4: Of like, what what do I think has to happen today?

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Speaker 3: What do I have on the schedule?

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Speaker 4: What emails haven't I responded to, like, what things are

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Speaker 4: like lie in the balance in my own life, in

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Speaker 4: the world, in our society, in other people's lives.

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Speaker 3: And then I'm like, what can I do?

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Speaker 4: And so I start with meditation, I art with drinking water,

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Speaker 4: I start with reading something that makes me feel good

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Speaker 4: for at least ten or fifteen minutes, something peaceful, maybe

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Speaker 4: something spiritual, And then I do some you know, free writing,

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Speaker 4: and just that settles me. And so to answer your

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Speaker 4: question specifically, I'm definitely, you know, I'm literally not sharing.

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Speaker 4: I'm certainly not literally sharing every thought I'm having every

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Speaker 4: moment of the time, Like I'm here now, glad to

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Speaker 4: share with you like that right now I'm experiencing, you know,

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Speaker 4: great gratitude for this moment, for this opportunity, for this connection,

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Speaker 4: for this communion, for everything that you're sharing. That resonates,

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Speaker 4: and then it's like a positive feedback loop that you know,

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Speaker 4: it's not possible for everyone to be experiencing this all

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Speaker 4: the time given their circumstances, Like there's so many people

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Speaker 4: you know that don't have enough food or shelter or clothing,

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Speaker 4: and like, hopefully those of us who do can do

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Speaker 4: whatever we can to be aware and remember were the

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Speaker 4: times when we have felt more in need, more calling

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Speaker 4: for love than capable of offering it.

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Speaker 3: And then what can we do?

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Speaker 4: What individual active actions can we take, what collective actions

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Speaker 4: can we take? And so certainly I know that I

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Speaker 4: am fortunate in so many ways, and I've been like

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Speaker 4: lucky for a lot, like for where I was born,

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Speaker 4: for who I you know, who my parents are, for

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Speaker 4: you know, my my gender, my all the all the

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Speaker 4: ways in which I haven't even had to confront so

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Speaker 4: many things that everyone has had to confront in their

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Speaker 4: lives that I didn't even know about.

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Speaker 3: Until people were like, hey, did you know?

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Speaker 4: And I was like, I think that everything's just been

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Speaker 4: fine for me, have been fine for everyone?

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Speaker 3: What are you talking about?

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Speaker 4: And so I do want to I want to put

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Speaker 4: you know, I want to say things that are true

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Speaker 4: and you know, my experience and hopefully universally, if not

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Speaker 4: accessible in the moment, can at LEAs be of help

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Speaker 4: of service of you know, whether it's to help people

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Speaker 4: laugh or to address like I feel like Some of

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Speaker 4: the jokes that I make are about the challenges that

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Speaker 4: the world is facing that I hope isn't just like

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Speaker 4: a oh no, what can we do about it? It

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Speaker 4: is it's like this, like but we always whatever, we

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Speaker 4: we always can do something in our own mind and

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Speaker 4: life and day, like while we're alive and awake and breathing.

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Speaker 3: So I do think it is. It has been a practice.

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Speaker 4: It has been like a constant state of reminding myself

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Speaker 4: and remembering that this is a possibility and that and

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Speaker 4: to be compassionate with myself and.

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Speaker 3: With others at whenever.

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Speaker 4: I whenever I'm like, oh god, no, Like the our

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Speaker 4: laundry machine isn't working right now, and my computer is

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Speaker 4: almost full. I'm like, I'm grateful to have a computer,

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Speaker 4: but like I almost couldn't save a podcast that I

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Speaker 4: did earlier, And I'm like, I could tell you all

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Speaker 4: of the things that I'm like, oh, like, I hope

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Speaker 4: that this is okay, Like I'll get a new computer

365
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Speaker 4: at some point, will I can bring my laundry somewhere else?

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Speaker 4: Like it's but the amount of the time in the

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Speaker 4: day and the things like right now, up until I

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Speaker 4: started thinking about that, like I wasn't focusing on those

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Speaker 4: things now, and I'm not focusing on those things now,

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Speaker 4: And like I will, I'm capable. I'm capable of addressing

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Speaker 4: a full computer. I'm capable of addressing like you know,

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Speaker 4: a wet laundry machine that isn't draining. I'm capable, Like I'm, like,

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Speaker 4: I've done things before. I think I've dealt with like

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Speaker 4: I'm I addressed like the loss of my grandmother earlier

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Speaker 4: this year, and I continue to address that. And and

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Speaker 4: when my mother is challenged and said, I've been talking

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Speaker 4: with her on the phone more frequently and like doing

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Speaker 4: my best to care for myself. And you know, I

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Speaker 4: think they say, like, you know, care for the person

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Speaker 4: in front of you right now, and then you know

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Speaker 4: if you have the time and effort and resources and

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Speaker 4: wherewithal to help other people. So certainly when I'm reaching

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Speaker 4: out with on social media with tweets, with posts like

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Speaker 4: those are times when clearly I'm not like busy dealing

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Speaker 4: with the laundry, busy dealing with you know, it's not

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Speaker 4: just a lie, like so it's I think, by virtue

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Speaker 4: of necessity, it has to be when I have at

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Speaker 4: least a moment to sit, to think, to express, be

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Speaker 4: like what do I want to express in this time

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Speaker 4: that I do have? So it might be the same

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Speaker 4: way that advice columns. I listened to like Dan Savage's

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Speaker 4: Savage Love Cast all the time, and whenever it comes out,

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Speaker 4: I listen to it. And he often says like that

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Speaker 4: his mailbox is has a skewed sample of people who

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Speaker 4: are writing to him with problems, Like so whenever somebody

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Speaker 4: is like I'm in this kind of relationship and I'm

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Speaker 4: having this challenge, He's like, I don't. Most people don't

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Speaker 4: write to me when they're fine. Most people are writing

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Speaker 4: to me when they need help. So I have a

400
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Speaker 4: skewed sample in that way. And I think that my

401
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Speaker 4: my social media feed is a skewed sample, perhaps slightly

402
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Speaker 4: in the other way, like I don't want to not

403
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Speaker 4: share when I'm dealing with a challenge, like like every month,

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Speaker 4: when on the anniversary of my grandmother's death, I like,

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Speaker 4: I'll post a photo of her and a memory and

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Speaker 4: like that I'm thinking about her, and that it's like

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Speaker 4: a you know, a yin yang of sorrow and joy

408
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Speaker 4: of remembering and celebrating, so that it's not as simple

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Speaker 4: as like my feed is just positivity, but it's like

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Speaker 4: my goal is to highlight the moments that I am,

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Speaker 4: you know, grateful for to be able to share these

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Speaker 4: moments of joy.

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Speaker 3: I know that was a lot.

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Speaker 2: No. No, first of all, that was a very complete answer.

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Speaker 2: We appreciate it. And I think also one thing I've

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Speaker 2: noticed on social media, a lot of you statements I

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Speaker 2: believe are for the person writing yes, you know.

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Speaker 3: Yeah.

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Speaker 2: So like a lot was like if someone tweets something

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Speaker 2: like you can get through this, You've gotten through other

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Speaker 2: things or whatever, it's like they're also saying I got

422
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Speaker 2: I can get through this. I want to this is

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Speaker 2: a positive affirmation for me and you you know, it's

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Speaker 2: kind of like the the people who say stuff they

425
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Speaker 2: start tweets with like when are we gonna have the

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Speaker 2: conversation about blank? And it's always like that means you

427
00:21:15,200 --> 00:21:19,240
Speaker 2: haven't had that conversation yet, and now you recognize there's

428
00:21:19,280 --> 00:21:21,840
Speaker 2: been a there needs to be a conversation, and you

429
00:21:22,119 --> 00:21:24,359
Speaker 2: don't really know where that conversation has been happening or

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Speaker 2: not happening. So you're like, come to me, let's let's

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Speaker 2: do a conversation about this topic that I don't normally

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Speaker 2: talk about, which I always just find interesting to kind

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Speaker 2: of flip it like that whenever I read that stuff.

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Speaker 4: Oh yeah, yeah, there's uh it's like classic stuff like

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Speaker 4: age old stuff that I've literally just learned in the

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Speaker 4: past couple of years.

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Speaker 3: Like, my girlfriend has been very helpful.

438
00:21:46,320 --> 00:21:49,119
Speaker 4: I have a new friend, Gus, who is a Buddhist

439
00:21:49,160 --> 00:21:51,600
Speaker 4: and a therapist, and he shared with me once this

440
00:21:51,720 --> 00:21:55,359
Speaker 4: story about being I think in a group therapy session

441
00:21:55,400 --> 00:21:58,959
Speaker 4: and one of the people in the group said, Okay,

442
00:21:59,119 --> 00:22:02,360
Speaker 4: what about this. What if there's a person on one

443
00:22:02,400 --> 00:22:03,960
Speaker 4: side of a door and it's locked and they're not

444
00:22:04,040 --> 00:22:06,439
Speaker 4: opening it up, and the other person's like knocking on

445
00:22:06,480 --> 00:22:08,320
Speaker 4: the door and being like, hey, let me in, we

446
00:22:08,400 --> 00:22:10,119
Speaker 4: have to like let help like and he's like, so,

447
00:22:10,160 --> 00:22:13,160
Speaker 4: which of the people in that situation is the one

448
00:22:13,160 --> 00:22:16,639
Speaker 4: who has to change? And then Gus said that what

449
00:22:16,720 --> 00:22:21,040
Speaker 4: he said was, well, that depends which one are you?

450
00:22:21,119 --> 00:22:24,399
Speaker 4: Like you are the only person, like you can't the answer.

451
00:22:24,480 --> 00:22:26,879
Speaker 4: My girlfriend always says this. She always is like, the

452
00:22:26,960 --> 00:22:29,840
Speaker 4: answer to your the solution to your problems, can't be

453
00:22:30,520 --> 00:22:33,520
Speaker 4: someone else has to do something like and that doesn't

454
00:22:33,560 --> 00:22:36,840
Speaker 4: mean that there aren't things outside of ourselves that are

455
00:22:36,840 --> 00:22:38,960
Speaker 4: beyond our control that it would be great if they

456
00:22:39,000 --> 00:22:42,480
Speaker 4: weren't happening. But like if you're in the rain, the

457
00:22:42,600 --> 00:22:46,040
Speaker 4: answer to I'm getting wet can't be it has to

458
00:22:46,119 --> 00:22:48,320
Speaker 4: stop raining. It has to be like, let me see

459
00:22:48,320 --> 00:22:51,359
Speaker 4: if I can find some cover, find an umbrella, or

460
00:22:51,800 --> 00:22:55,960
Speaker 4: become okay with being rained on right now, change something

461
00:22:56,320 --> 00:22:58,919
Speaker 4: in my If you can change your circumstances, great, If

462
00:22:58,960 --> 00:23:02,399
Speaker 4: you can change your atitude about your circumstances, great, But

463
00:23:02,920 --> 00:23:06,320
Speaker 4: it can't be the answer to everything can't be. Somebody

464
00:23:06,359 --> 00:23:09,760
Speaker 4: else has to do something because and so like the

465
00:23:09,760 --> 00:23:11,960
Speaker 4: tweets that you're talking about where people are like you.

466
00:23:11,920 --> 00:23:14,080
Speaker 3: Know what's wrong with people? You know what people have

467
00:23:14,200 --> 00:23:14,480
Speaker 3: to do.

468
00:23:14,760 --> 00:23:19,080
Speaker 4: People have to stop being sew judgmental, like, oh, well, like,

469
00:23:19,240 --> 00:23:22,159
Speaker 4: let's see if if we And that's the thought that

470
00:23:22,280 --> 00:23:26,240
Speaker 4: I've I've probably been that person. I've probably been a

471
00:23:26,240 --> 00:23:29,480
Speaker 4: person that's like it would be great if everyone would

472
00:23:29,520 --> 00:23:33,040
Speaker 4: do this. So the next step is I'm part of everyone,

473
00:23:33,320 --> 00:23:36,760
Speaker 4: so let me do this. Like I was just sharing

474
00:23:36,880 --> 00:23:39,280
Speaker 4: a friend, I oh, go go, what.

475
00:23:39,359 --> 00:23:42,280
Speaker 2: Are things on Twitter? That I had to recognize for

476
00:23:42,359 --> 00:23:47,040
Speaker 2: myself was I would do things like I would say

477
00:23:47,040 --> 00:23:48,800
Speaker 2: the opposite of what I really meant, so like I

478
00:23:48,800 --> 00:23:51,200
Speaker 2: hadn't examined what I really had thought about, Like I

479
00:23:51,240 --> 00:23:53,000
Speaker 2: hadn't thought all the way through. So I would be like,

480
00:23:53,440 --> 00:23:55,919
Speaker 2: I'm gonna say this statement, and I just want everyone

481
00:23:55,960 --> 00:23:58,560
Speaker 2: to agree. And I say a statement that obviously not

482
00:23:58,640 --> 00:24:02,320
Speaker 2: everyone's gonna agree. There's some people on Twitter, and then

483
00:24:02,359 --> 00:24:03,879
Speaker 2: I would be like, and I don't want anyone to

484
00:24:03,960 --> 00:24:05,399
Speaker 2: argue with me. But then I would argue with the

485
00:24:05,400 --> 00:24:07,399
Speaker 2: people who argue with me, and then I would go

486
00:24:07,480 --> 00:24:11,080
Speaker 2: back and forth, and so eventually I just like, but

487
00:24:11,200 --> 00:24:14,040
Speaker 2: what can I can control? Like I can't, you know,

488
00:24:14,160 --> 00:24:17,040
Speaker 2: and like what imposts? Do I lack the will power

489
00:24:17,080 --> 00:24:19,240
Speaker 2: to control? And also what do I really want? Because

490
00:24:19,600 --> 00:24:22,480
Speaker 2: sometimes what you really want is to argue with somebody,

491
00:24:22,520 --> 00:24:25,120
Speaker 2: Like it's not right necessarily and you need to examine

492
00:24:25,119 --> 00:24:27,440
Speaker 2: why you want to do that. But that is what

493
00:24:27,480 --> 00:24:29,040
Speaker 2: you want. You're saying the opposite of what you want.

494
00:24:29,119 --> 00:24:30,879
Speaker 2: You're saying, I don't want anyone to interact with me.

495
00:24:31,000 --> 00:24:34,399
Speaker 2: You know, you know what I'm saying, don't pay me attention.

496
00:24:34,480 --> 00:24:36,800
Speaker 2: But I'm sharing this thing in this place that's called

497
00:24:36,800 --> 00:24:40,080
Speaker 2: attention land. Yes, so I think that is a big

498
00:24:40,720 --> 00:24:42,760
Speaker 2: thing too, is like if you know yourself, you have

499
00:24:42,800 --> 00:24:45,159
Speaker 2: to know yourself before you can even like change your

500
00:24:45,200 --> 00:24:48,479
Speaker 2: attitude or understand where your attitude is coming from or

501
00:24:48,600 --> 00:24:51,800
Speaker 2: the imposts that control like your actions and stuff. I

502
00:24:51,800 --> 00:24:54,520
Speaker 2: think that's a very difficult thing for people to master,

503
00:24:54,720 --> 00:24:57,080
Speaker 2: or I don't think anyone can. Maybe not master's the

504
00:24:57,080 --> 00:24:59,720
Speaker 2: wrong word, but it's a very difficult thing to even

505
00:24:59,760 --> 00:25:03,119
Speaker 2: have mindfulness of at all times, because you know, we

506
00:25:03,280 --> 00:25:04,520
Speaker 2: just slip into it so easily.

507
00:25:04,600 --> 00:25:08,040
Speaker 7: Yeah, And also I think a lot of that comes

508
00:25:08,040 --> 00:25:10,240
Speaker 7: with age and maturity, because as you.

509
00:25:10,160 --> 00:25:12,840
Speaker 5: Get older, you just experience different things.

510
00:25:13,200 --> 00:25:18,040
Speaker 7: Your attitude changes, your frame of mind changes, your body changes,

511
00:25:18,640 --> 00:25:21,159
Speaker 7: you know you mentally and spirits. You just grow in

512
00:25:21,200 --> 00:25:23,720
Speaker 7: all these areas, good for the good and the bad.

513
00:25:23,840 --> 00:25:27,000
Speaker 7: You just grow in all these areas and then you

514
00:25:27,040 --> 00:25:29,800
Speaker 7: get to the point where you can re examine it

515
00:25:29,840 --> 00:25:32,600
Speaker 7: based on the history. But if you don't have the history,

516
00:25:32,640 --> 00:25:35,080
Speaker 7: you can't examine it, so you don't know that there

517
00:25:35,160 --> 00:25:37,200
Speaker 7: needs to be a change if you haven't been doing

518
00:25:37,200 --> 00:25:38,480
Speaker 7: the behavior long enough.

519
00:25:38,280 --> 00:25:41,399
Speaker 2: To realize that the changess Like you almost need the

520
00:25:41,520 --> 00:25:45,159
Speaker 2: experience of making those i'm gonna say mistakes or whatever,

521
00:25:45,359 --> 00:25:47,760
Speaker 2: but they become those learning experiences to be like, oh,

522
00:25:47,840 --> 00:25:51,440
Speaker 2: this didn't feel me like I thought this saying this

523
00:25:51,560 --> 00:25:53,520
Speaker 2: statement and a lot of people paying attention to it

524
00:25:53,560 --> 00:25:56,879
Speaker 2: would give me like something inside And maybe it did

525
00:25:56,920 --> 00:25:59,520
Speaker 2: give me something, but it was anxiety or it was

526
00:26:00,359 --> 00:26:03,719
Speaker 2: you know, depression doing something. I didn't want that, and

527
00:26:03,760 --> 00:26:05,600
Speaker 2: so you experienced that and you go, oh, I don't

528
00:26:05,600 --> 00:26:07,960
Speaker 2: want to do that again, you know, because I think

529
00:26:08,119 --> 00:26:10,159
Speaker 2: you can kind of go into that spiral. And then

530
00:26:10,480 --> 00:26:13,960
Speaker 2: the other thing is once I took that responsibility for myself,

531
00:26:14,000 --> 00:26:15,640
Speaker 2: I was, you know, like to get out the rain

532
00:26:15,760 --> 00:26:18,000
Speaker 2: or to get the umbrella or whatever, or to change

533
00:26:18,000 --> 00:26:21,000
Speaker 2: my attitude about being in the rain. That was when

534
00:26:21,480 --> 00:26:24,040
Speaker 2: I saw it in other people like my like when

535
00:26:24,080 --> 00:26:26,960
Speaker 2: my friends I have, you know, you might text them, hey, everything, okay,

536
00:26:26,960 --> 00:26:30,240
Speaker 2: I noticed kind of arguing out on Facebook or whatever.

537
00:26:30,320 --> 00:26:32,359
Speaker 2: You know, just want to check you out, you know everything.

538
00:26:32,400 --> 00:26:34,639
Speaker 2: If you find your fine, you find your fine. But

539
00:26:34,680 --> 00:26:37,320
Speaker 2: if you want to talk about things with someone who's

540
00:26:37,320 --> 00:26:38,840
Speaker 2: not going to like assume the worst.

541
00:26:38,680 --> 00:26:42,880
Speaker 5: Of you, because I'm afraid of being judged.

542
00:26:42,920 --> 00:26:47,040
Speaker 7: And I think that for a lot of people, particularly

543
00:26:47,119 --> 00:26:49,760
Speaker 7: with social media and all the things that are going on,

544
00:26:50,440 --> 00:26:53,119
Speaker 7: it's very hard to get people to change that mindset.

545
00:26:53,200 --> 00:26:55,199
Speaker 7: Like Michael said, it's very hard to get people to

546
00:26:55,400 --> 00:27:02,520
Speaker 7: understand that your your behavior is actually going through uh

547
00:27:02,880 --> 00:27:05,080
Speaker 7: I guess going through the water and affecting other things

548
00:27:05,080 --> 00:27:08,200
Speaker 7: around you regardless, like we're all connected, regardless if you

549
00:27:08,280 --> 00:27:11,479
Speaker 7: realize it or not. Your bad attitude can actually make

550
00:27:11,560 --> 00:27:13,960
Speaker 7: somebody else's bad attitude can make somebody else's better.

551
00:27:13,920 --> 00:27:15,360
Speaker 6: But the companies know it.

552
00:27:15,680 --> 00:27:18,640
Speaker 2: Yes, I don't know, Mike, if you watched the documentary's

553
00:27:18,680 --> 00:27:20,520
Speaker 2: Social Dilemma, it's oh.

554
00:27:20,440 --> 00:27:24,119
Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, like they you know, for everyone, Yeah, just

555
00:27:24,440 --> 00:27:26,600
Speaker 4: a quick recap of that movie. It's it's all about

556
00:27:26,600 --> 00:27:29,520
Speaker 4: how the technology companies, the social media companies are trying

557
00:27:29,520 --> 00:27:34,120
Speaker 4: to manipulate everyone and their work. It's manipulating everyone except

558
00:27:34,160 --> 00:27:34,480
Speaker 4: for me.

559
00:27:34,680 --> 00:27:37,040
Speaker 2: Please go yeah yeah, yeah, the rest of you have

560
00:27:37,080 --> 00:27:39,359
Speaker 2: a problem. But me and Mike got to thing figured out.

561
00:27:39,480 --> 00:27:40,320
Speaker 3: So yeah.

562
00:27:40,720 --> 00:27:43,600
Speaker 2: But but like see, like I mean, we kind of

563
00:27:43,640 --> 00:27:45,280
Speaker 2: already knew this stuff because we read a lot and

564
00:27:45,280 --> 00:27:46,240
Speaker 2: we talk about it on the show.

565
00:27:46,560 --> 00:27:50,000
Speaker 6: But still when you watch the movie, other than.

566
00:27:49,920 --> 00:27:51,919
Speaker 2: Kunt of the reenactments, I thought the re enactments are

567
00:27:51,920 --> 00:27:54,120
Speaker 2: a little oh yeah, yeah, they got it. They could

568
00:27:54,080 --> 00:27:54,800
Speaker 2: have took that out.

569
00:27:54,880 --> 00:27:54,960
Speaker 4: No.

570
00:27:55,080 --> 00:27:56,840
Speaker 2: I mean, you know, glad those guys got work. It's

571
00:27:56,840 --> 00:27:59,680
Speaker 2: good to see Pete from uh Man man. But yeah,

572
00:28:00,200 --> 00:28:02,080
Speaker 2: it's general. I was like, this is twenty minutes too long.

573
00:28:02,160 --> 00:28:07,000
Speaker 2: But seeing the way that the like algorithms work, and

574
00:28:07,080 --> 00:28:11,600
Speaker 2: how I think when we were younger and we had that,

575
00:28:11,800 --> 00:28:14,280
Speaker 2: or just the concept of AIS was in movies and

576
00:28:14,400 --> 00:28:17,000
Speaker 2: TV and stuff. It was just stuff like artificial intelligence

577
00:28:17,000 --> 00:28:20,040
Speaker 2: won't be like us. It's not gonna be biased. It

578
00:28:20,080 --> 00:28:22,199
Speaker 2: won't be racist because it won't care about race. It

579
00:28:22,240 --> 00:28:24,800
Speaker 2: won't be classes because it's not gonna care what classes.

580
00:28:24,840 --> 00:28:27,000
Speaker 2: It's not gonna be saying and right, and instead of

581
00:28:27,040 --> 00:28:29,880
Speaker 2: what happens is that the one the AI is carried

582
00:28:29,880 --> 00:28:32,000
Speaker 2: by humans, right, who have all those things. But then

583
00:28:32,040 --> 00:28:35,280
Speaker 2: also the AI is almost worse because it's a political

584
00:28:35,320 --> 00:28:36,320
Speaker 2: like it doesn't give a fuck.

585
00:28:36,400 --> 00:28:38,600
Speaker 5: It's like, what the best result?

586
00:28:38,720 --> 00:28:41,160
Speaker 2: This is gonna put you in a group that like

587
00:28:41,440 --> 00:28:44,440
Speaker 2: it'll keep you clicking. But this group is saying coronavirus

588
00:28:44,520 --> 00:28:46,960
Speaker 2: isn't real and you shouldn't wear a mask. I actually

589
00:28:47,000 --> 00:28:49,720
Speaker 2: don't care what that does to humanity. You know, Oh,

590
00:28:49,800 --> 00:28:52,120
Speaker 2: this group here, this group is gonna tell you to

591
00:28:52,160 --> 00:28:55,560
Speaker 2: go out with a gun and stand in the streets

592
00:28:55,720 --> 00:28:59,440
Speaker 2: and shoot at Black Lives Matter protesters. I mean you're

593
00:28:59,480 --> 00:29:03,520
Speaker 2: clicking in and you're activity, You're looking at ads and

594
00:29:03,560 --> 00:29:06,200
Speaker 2: you're like, this is what we want this interaction. So

595
00:29:06,720 --> 00:29:09,920
Speaker 2: I think like being aware of that mind field also

596
00:29:10,040 --> 00:29:14,040
Speaker 2: helps because, like you said, your mentality, it is infectious.

597
00:29:14,080 --> 00:29:16,600
Speaker 2: It does affect other people, but it also on the

598
00:29:16,760 --> 00:29:21,160
Speaker 2: online it moves you to a to other places. So

599
00:29:21,320 --> 00:29:25,360
Speaker 2: if you do kind of harbor more aggressive stuff, it

600
00:29:25,480 --> 00:29:28,600
Speaker 2: moves you to the aggressive part of social media, and

601
00:29:28,640 --> 00:29:30,840
Speaker 2: now you're surrounded by that aggression and it becomes that

602
00:29:30,880 --> 00:29:34,720
Speaker 2: feedback loop that like Mike was talking about as opposed

603
00:29:34,760 --> 00:29:36,640
Speaker 2: to what I'm into now is kind of like a

604
00:29:36,640 --> 00:29:40,920
Speaker 2: personal feedback in the loop. So like like gratitude, right,

605
00:29:41,040 --> 00:29:43,800
Speaker 2: So gratitude to me is almost like exercise. When you

606
00:29:43,840 --> 00:29:46,200
Speaker 2: go out and exercise. You like sometimes you don't want

607
00:29:46,200 --> 00:29:47,800
Speaker 2: to do it, but you go out and your exercise

608
00:29:47,840 --> 00:29:49,360
Speaker 2: and you know for a fact it's gonna make your

609
00:29:49,360 --> 00:29:51,840
Speaker 2: brain think faster, it's gonna make your body healthier, it's

610
00:29:51,840 --> 00:29:54,080
Speaker 2: gonna make you drink more water. It's gonna like it's

611
00:29:54,080 --> 00:29:56,520
Speaker 2: gonna have a bunch of positive effects. And if you

612
00:29:56,600 --> 00:29:58,840
Speaker 2: do it, then you want to do it again, like

613
00:29:59,000 --> 00:30:01,120
Speaker 2: it's easier to do it the next day than it

614
00:30:01,200 --> 00:30:03,120
Speaker 2: was a day before, and then the next day, and

615
00:30:03,160 --> 00:30:05,320
Speaker 2: eventually it becomes like a habit, and now you're like,

616
00:30:05,400 --> 00:30:07,800
Speaker 2: I just I'm a person who exercises. And I think

617
00:30:07,840 --> 00:30:11,720
Speaker 2: gratitude is like that, mindfulness is like that, meditation is

618
00:30:11,800 --> 00:30:14,200
Speaker 2: like that, Like it's kind of that thing, and but

619
00:30:14,280 --> 00:30:18,240
Speaker 2: it's a personal thing as opposed to a social media

620
00:30:18,320 --> 00:30:21,280
Speaker 2: thing or something external coming into you.

621
00:30:21,600 --> 00:30:24,960
Speaker 7: Yeah, And also I think that truth be told. Social

622
00:30:25,000 --> 00:30:28,880
Speaker 7: media strips that out of humanity. Social media those things

623
00:30:29,000 --> 00:30:31,560
Speaker 7: you talk about. Social media is designed to strip that

624
00:30:31,600 --> 00:30:34,880
Speaker 7: out because you're talking about an AI that doesn't care

625
00:30:35,000 --> 00:30:38,200
Speaker 7: about those emotions. It doesn't care about the impact on you,

626
00:30:38,480 --> 00:30:41,160
Speaker 7: and doesn't care about the sadness it brings, the depression

627
00:30:41,200 --> 00:30:43,880
Speaker 7: that brings, the anger it brings, the anxiety it brings.

628
00:30:43,920 --> 00:30:46,840
Speaker 7: It goes are you clicking yes or no? And so

629
00:30:47,320 --> 00:30:49,640
Speaker 7: people are trapped in this like they're trapped in this

630
00:30:49,680 --> 00:30:53,400
Speaker 7: thing that's kind of mapping out their minds. And then

631
00:30:53,560 --> 00:30:56,640
Speaker 7: it's an addiction too, because it likes if the part

632
00:30:56,640 --> 00:31:00,800
Speaker 7: of your brain reward reward, reward, reward, and so people

633
00:31:00,880 --> 00:31:03,120
Speaker 7: think you're crazy when you tell people, Hey, you need

634
00:31:03,160 --> 00:31:05,320
Speaker 7: to actually take a social media break. You need to

635
00:31:05,360 --> 00:31:07,360
Speaker 7: actually delete the apps for a second. You need to

636
00:31:07,400 --> 00:31:11,120
Speaker 7: actually step back. I know, for me, I think I

637
00:31:11,160 --> 00:31:14,800
Speaker 7: did this thing for maybe about a week. I deleted

638
00:31:14,840 --> 00:31:17,440
Speaker 7: my personal Facebook page, and.

639
00:31:18,960 --> 00:31:21,240
Speaker 5: I had anxiety. That's when I knew it was addiction.

640
00:31:21,480 --> 00:31:23,800
Speaker 7: Like I knew it was I was addicted because and

641
00:31:23,800 --> 00:31:27,280
Speaker 7: not only didn't give me anxiety, they asked me like

642
00:31:27,320 --> 00:31:28,680
Speaker 7: three or four times, are you sure?

643
00:31:28,960 --> 00:31:31,840
Speaker 5: Are you sure take a break, take thirty days? Are

644
00:31:31,840 --> 00:31:34,120
Speaker 5: you sure we won't delete it? Are you sure you

645
00:31:34,120 --> 00:31:34,680
Speaker 5: want to leave?

646
00:31:35,120 --> 00:31:35,200
Speaker 4: Like?

647
00:31:35,240 --> 00:31:37,440
Speaker 5: Are you positive? Like it literally asks me like four

648
00:31:37,520 --> 00:31:40,920
Speaker 5: or five times. Yes, it's like.

649
00:31:40,880 --> 00:31:43,280
Speaker 2: You know, you just need a break.

650
00:31:43,320 --> 00:31:45,600
Speaker 5: You know you'll be you'll be back on the drugs

651
00:31:45,600 --> 00:31:46,120
Speaker 5: next week.

652
00:31:47,400 --> 00:31:51,960
Speaker 4: Guys, imagine imagine if you had to unsubscribe from your

653
00:31:52,040 --> 00:31:52,760
Speaker 4: drug dealer.

654
00:31:53,080 --> 00:31:56,640
Speaker 3: Yeah, are you sure?

655
00:31:56,960 --> 00:31:59,440
Speaker 4: Like, look, I'll give you some more two weeks free

656
00:31:59,520 --> 00:32:04,120
Speaker 4: for the point better discount. Say that's what's happening, because

657
00:32:04,720 --> 00:32:06,920
Speaker 4: there's if you ever look at a video online that

658
00:32:07,000 --> 00:32:10,920
Speaker 4: has like a million views, it'll have let's say, you know,

659
00:32:10,960 --> 00:32:12,560
Speaker 4: one hundred thousand likes.

660
00:32:12,800 --> 00:32:15,040
Speaker 3: Let's say it has ten thousand dislikes.

661
00:32:15,160 --> 00:32:17,000
Speaker 4: But then if you look at the comments, it'll have

662
00:32:17,040 --> 00:32:21,640
Speaker 4: a disproportionately high number of negative comments compared to how

663
00:32:21,640 --> 00:32:24,000
Speaker 4: many people watched it and liked it, because people who

664
00:32:24,120 --> 00:32:26,560
Speaker 4: just like it just go on with their day, and

665
00:32:26,600 --> 00:32:29,480
Speaker 4: that's not good for the business, for the clicks, for

666
00:32:29,600 --> 00:32:32,760
Speaker 4: the likes, because they're they're in the business of keeping

667
00:32:32,800 --> 00:32:36,640
Speaker 4: you wanting, like capitalism, like advertising, like you, if you

668
00:32:36,800 --> 00:32:40,320
Speaker 4: have we so many people have what they need, Like

669
00:32:40,320 --> 00:32:43,040
Speaker 4: you don't need the newer thing, if your older thing

670
00:32:43,240 --> 00:32:46,560
Speaker 4: is working, if you have enough food, like you don't

671
00:32:46,600 --> 00:32:50,320
Speaker 4: need more a newer every kind of Oh it's in

672
00:32:50,360 --> 00:32:53,200
Speaker 4: a different cart now it's a different color and slightly

673
00:32:53,200 --> 00:32:57,480
Speaker 4: different name and flavor. And so the thing that's going

674
00:32:57,520 --> 00:33:00,560
Speaker 4: on on Facebook, I just had this thought. It's like,

675
00:33:00,560 --> 00:33:03,720
Speaker 4: like that the effectiveness of it. It's good at doing

676
00:33:03,760 --> 00:33:06,760
Speaker 4: the thing that it's doing, but it's not doing an ethical,

677
00:33:07,160 --> 00:33:08,080
Speaker 4: moral thing.

678
00:33:08,480 --> 00:33:10,920
Speaker 3: It's like it's basically like the equivalent. I'm sorry to

679
00:33:11,040 --> 00:33:13,520
Speaker 3: jump to this, but I was saying, like Hitler.

680
00:33:13,560 --> 00:33:16,480
Speaker 4: You have to admit he was a good public speaker.

681
00:33:16,840 --> 00:33:21,280
Speaker 4: It's like, yeah, social media is good at enslaving people

682
00:33:21,520 --> 00:33:25,640
Speaker 4: in a way electronically technologically, you have to admit that

683
00:33:25,680 --> 00:33:31,240
Speaker 4: it's a good authoritarian government. You must admit that it's

684
00:33:31,360 --> 00:33:37,400
Speaker 4: effective at doing this thing. And there's a thing I have,

685
00:33:37,520 --> 00:33:39,960
Speaker 4: like seven things I want to say, but I'll do

686
00:33:40,040 --> 00:33:42,880
Speaker 4: one at a time and continue the conversation because I

687
00:33:43,240 --> 00:33:47,120
Speaker 4: love talking to y'all so much. A thing that's been

688
00:33:47,200 --> 00:33:53,240
Speaker 4: valuable for me has been muting people who have consistently

689
00:33:53,760 --> 00:33:57,200
Speaker 4: not provided value to my life on social media, Like

690
00:33:57,440 --> 00:34:01,640
Speaker 4: if I post a thought about what I believe politically,

691
00:34:01,960 --> 00:34:07,960
Speaker 4: sometimes there are people who respond respectfully and civilly and disagree.

692
00:34:08,200 --> 00:34:11,680
Speaker 4: And I've had great conversations where I'm open to learning,

693
00:34:11,920 --> 00:34:14,439
Speaker 4: where they're open to hearing what I have to say.

694
00:34:14,640 --> 00:34:18,319
Speaker 4: Maybe we don't end up changing each other's minds, but

695
00:34:18,640 --> 00:34:21,239
Speaker 4: I do like if they provide stats that I didn't have,

696
00:34:21,400 --> 00:34:24,800
Speaker 4: or I provide a viewpoint that they didn't have, like that.

697
00:34:24,680 --> 00:34:25,520
Speaker 3: Can be valuable.

698
00:34:25,600 --> 00:34:28,240
Speaker 4: But there's some people who like on almost every post

699
00:34:28,400 --> 00:34:32,000
Speaker 4: that gets above a certain number of reactions of a

700
00:34:32,040 --> 00:34:35,000
Speaker 4: certain kind, like they're there being.

701
00:34:34,719 --> 00:34:36,959
Speaker 3: Like, but what about but did you ever?

702
00:34:37,120 --> 00:34:40,399
Speaker 4: But in the I've been studying with my Buddhist friend

703
00:34:40,400 --> 00:34:44,960
Speaker 4: Gus this thing called Tibetan debate it's a structure of

704
00:34:45,040 --> 00:34:48,160
Speaker 4: like of debate that you know was made popular in

705
00:34:48,719 --> 00:34:53,680
Speaker 4: Tibet and other Asian nations, where one of the main

706
00:34:53,840 --> 00:34:56,600
Speaker 4: things about it to have a valid argument, to have

707
00:34:56,640 --> 00:35:00,600
Speaker 4: a valid point to make. It's necessar already to have

708
00:35:00,880 --> 00:35:04,399
Speaker 4: a person who wants to hear it, who agrees at

709
00:35:04,520 --> 00:35:07,799
Speaker 4: least that the The the undertaking that you're involved in

710
00:35:08,160 --> 00:35:10,560
Speaker 4: is for you to both try to figure out what

711
00:35:10,760 --> 00:35:14,000
Speaker 4: is true and what is real, like in a process

712
00:35:14,239 --> 00:35:16,640
Speaker 4: together by being like, okay, well, if this is true,

713
00:35:16,680 --> 00:35:18,880
Speaker 4: then then does that mean that this is true? And

714
00:35:18,920 --> 00:35:21,000
Speaker 4: if this is true then and if there are people

715
00:35:21,040 --> 00:35:26,200
Speaker 4: who don't accept your initial premises or definitions, then there's

716
00:35:26,360 --> 00:35:29,040
Speaker 4: no way. And so I've been so it's been so

717
00:35:29,280 --> 00:35:32,959
Speaker 4: joyful to be able to see and I give people

718
00:35:33,000 --> 00:35:35,280
Speaker 4: a chance, Like if I see a new name saying

719
00:35:35,320 --> 00:35:36,920
Speaker 4: a thing that I don't agree with, I'll be like, oh,

720
00:35:37,080 --> 00:35:39,840
Speaker 4: let me listen to what they're saying and offer my

721
00:35:40,280 --> 00:35:44,120
Speaker 4: sincere response. And if they are not responding in good faith,

722
00:35:44,320 --> 00:35:46,839
Speaker 4: then after after one or two posts, I'll be like, well,

723
00:35:46,880 --> 00:35:49,319
Speaker 4: I don't think that we are going to either of

724
00:35:49,400 --> 00:35:51,359
Speaker 4: us gain anything out of us. I don't think it's

725
00:35:51,880 --> 00:35:54,600
Speaker 4: optimal for people to only live in a bubble with

726
00:35:54,680 --> 00:35:58,000
Speaker 4: people who already preach to the same choirs and believe

727
00:35:58,000 --> 00:36:01,239
Speaker 4: the same things. It's important to the comfort zone. And

728
00:36:01,280 --> 00:36:03,800
Speaker 4: I have plenty of plenty of beloved friends who I

729
00:36:03,840 --> 00:36:07,160
Speaker 4: don't agree about everything with, and family members who I'm like,

730
00:36:07,480 --> 00:36:09,799
Speaker 4: I'm glad to love this person and care for this

731
00:36:09,880 --> 00:36:13,640
Speaker 4: person and push them and let them push me, because

732
00:36:13,680 --> 00:36:16,040
Speaker 4: we know deep down, like we care about each other

733
00:36:16,080 --> 00:36:19,080
Speaker 4: and we have the same goal of being heard and

734
00:36:19,200 --> 00:36:22,400
Speaker 4: hearing one another and trying to strive for the truth.

735
00:36:22,480 --> 00:36:27,480
Speaker 4: And I don't owe any stranger a specific anything beyond

736
00:36:27,600 --> 00:36:31,239
Speaker 4: you know, civility, kindness, respect. I don't owe anyone a

737
00:36:31,280 --> 00:36:35,360
Speaker 4: specific response. Nobody owes anyone that like, like but you know,

738
00:36:35,480 --> 00:36:39,040
Speaker 4: freedom of like there's no like legal concerns, there's no

739
00:36:39,200 --> 00:36:45,320
Speaker 4: ethical morality responsibility. It's just like my friend Zach Zach Scherwin,

740
00:36:45,360 --> 00:36:49,240
Speaker 4: wonderful comedian and creator of all kinds of wonderful comedy

741
00:36:49,280 --> 00:36:55,800
Speaker 4: and rap art Napkins, Oh yeah, previously empty mister Napkins,

742
00:36:55,880 --> 00:37:00,840
Speaker 4: now just the original name Zach Kerwin. He has shared

743
00:37:00,880 --> 00:37:02,840
Speaker 4: with me that like one time we're on tour and

744
00:37:02,880 --> 00:37:05,080
Speaker 4: he bought this bag of chips and then he ate

745
00:37:05,120 --> 00:37:07,120
Speaker 4: the whole bag of chips, and he's like, I gotta

746
00:37:07,160 --> 00:37:09,600
Speaker 4: not buy these bags of chips because once I have

747
00:37:09,680 --> 00:37:13,400
Speaker 4: the bag of chips, I can't not eat all the chips.

748
00:37:13,520 --> 00:37:16,920
Speaker 4: But I can like level one, level two, I can

749
00:37:17,440 --> 00:37:19,120
Speaker 4: not buy the bag of chips.

750
00:37:19,360 --> 00:37:21,040
Speaker 3: He's like, I can even in the.

751
00:37:21,000 --> 00:37:23,040
Speaker 4: Store carry the bag of chips around me, like, you

752
00:37:23,120 --> 00:37:24,719
Speaker 4: know what, not gonna get the bag of chips. It

753
00:37:24,719 --> 00:37:27,359
Speaker 4: feels good to think about getting it and then never mind,

754
00:37:27,600 --> 00:37:29,880
Speaker 4: don't need to get it. Would rather not get the

755
00:37:29,920 --> 00:37:31,960
Speaker 4: bag of chips in this particular situation.

756
00:37:32,040 --> 00:37:33,120
Speaker 3: I don't want to eat more.

757
00:37:33,040 --> 00:37:34,719
Speaker 4: Chips than I want, so I'm not gonna get the

758
00:37:34,800 --> 00:37:38,200
Speaker 4: chips for me. Once I start engaging with somebody online,

759
00:37:38,280 --> 00:37:42,160
Speaker 4: it's very hard to stop. Once I bite one, then

760
00:37:42,200 --> 00:37:44,279
Speaker 4: I'm like, oh I got I got Did they write back?

761
00:37:44,360 --> 00:37:48,480
Speaker 4: Did I win? Oh no, I lost three days? You

762
00:37:48,520 --> 00:37:50,840
Speaker 4: know what I want to I want? And so it

763
00:37:50,920 --> 00:37:53,239
Speaker 4: feels so good when when a new one comes in

764
00:37:53,320 --> 00:37:56,279
Speaker 4: from like a particular person, I'm like, so grateful for

765
00:37:56,360 --> 00:37:58,799
Speaker 4: these people to have helped me learn this lesson that

766
00:37:58,960 --> 00:38:03,800
Speaker 4: like I've never one with them, I've only lost time

767
00:38:04,200 --> 00:38:06,160
Speaker 4: and gained anxiety, like.

768
00:38:06,040 --> 00:38:08,759
Speaker 2: You said, just to be like a lot of this

769
00:38:08,800 --> 00:38:14,200
Speaker 2: stuff is about having attention. So like even if as

770
00:38:14,239 --> 00:38:17,160
Speaker 2: you feel like I'm not like I can't one, i

771
00:38:17,160 --> 00:38:20,000
Speaker 2: can't win, I can only lose, I'm wasting my time

772
00:38:20,600 --> 00:38:22,439
Speaker 2: for them, it's not the same all the time.

773
00:38:22,560 --> 00:38:25,040
Speaker 6: Like if it was engaging in good faith, they would.

774
00:38:24,880 --> 00:38:27,200
Speaker 2: Probably feel that way too, like like, wow, we're so

775
00:38:28,040 --> 00:38:31,560
Speaker 2: disparate in our opinions that we're both unfulfilled. But there's

776
00:38:31,600 --> 00:38:34,600
Speaker 2: a weird thing where people feel fulfilled of just making

777
00:38:34,640 --> 00:38:38,680
Speaker 2: you frustrated, so like they're getting something and you're getting

778
00:38:38,800 --> 00:38:41,960
Speaker 2: you're getting a negative experience to their Like, yeah, but

779
00:38:42,040 --> 00:38:44,360
Speaker 2: did you see how mad I had Mike today? He

780
00:38:44,480 --> 00:38:45,359
Speaker 2: was so fucking mad.

781
00:38:45,560 --> 00:38:48,440
Speaker 7: That's a vampire and energy vampire sucker, Like they just

782
00:38:48,480 --> 00:38:49,680
Speaker 7: sucked their energy out of you.

783
00:38:50,560 --> 00:38:52,799
Speaker 3: Yeah, there's a thing I think I'll hope I get

784
00:38:52,840 --> 00:38:53,480
Speaker 3: this quote right.

785
00:38:53,520 --> 00:38:57,440
Speaker 4: It's something like, you know, if you wrestle with a pig,

786
00:38:57,480 --> 00:39:00,760
Speaker 4: if you fight with a pig, then like a literal pig,

787
00:39:01,320 --> 00:39:04,200
Speaker 4: then you're both gonna get mud all over you or

788
00:39:04,280 --> 00:39:08,040
Speaker 4: shit all over you. But the pig loves it, so

789
00:39:08,200 --> 00:39:12,280
Speaker 4: you can only save yourself. Question in the comments I see,

790
00:39:12,719 --> 00:39:16,320
Speaker 4: h not block, depends on which social media we're talking about.

791
00:39:16,440 --> 00:39:21,520
Speaker 4: What I love is on Facebook to hide a person's

792
00:39:21,920 --> 00:39:23,239
Speaker 4: outraging comments that.

793
00:39:23,360 --> 00:39:24,080
Speaker 3: Used to agree with it.

794
00:39:24,160 --> 00:39:25,160
Speaker 5: That's my favorite thing.

795
00:39:25,040 --> 00:39:27,600
Speaker 4: To do hot and hide it and then I don't

796
00:39:27,600 --> 00:39:30,400
Speaker 4: see it anymore. My fans and friends don't see it anymore.

797
00:39:30,640 --> 00:39:33,800
Speaker 4: Only they see it and they don't even know whether,

798
00:39:34,160 --> 00:39:36,160
Speaker 4: like they don't know if I'm looking at it every day,

799
00:39:36,280 --> 00:39:39,640
Speaker 4: whatever it is, I'm not thinking about it anymore. And

800
00:39:39,680 --> 00:39:42,600
Speaker 4: if it's on Twitter, like I have blocked people at

801
00:39:42,600 --> 00:39:45,279
Speaker 4: times in the past, when in an extreme situations, but

802
00:39:45,400 --> 00:39:49,319
Speaker 4: mostly I will mute people because then if they're writing things,

803
00:39:49,360 --> 00:39:53,080
Speaker 4: if they've written extensively, almost exclusively, things that I didn't

804
00:39:53,160 --> 00:39:54,520
Speaker 4: like seeing, they'll be Oh, then I.

805
00:39:54,480 --> 00:39:55,480
Speaker 3: Don't want to see it anymore.

806
00:39:55,600 --> 00:39:57,560
Speaker 4: I don't mind if they see my things and they

807
00:39:57,600 --> 00:40:01,120
Speaker 4: respond or whatever they're doing doesn't to me, and.

808
00:40:01,080 --> 00:40:04,880
Speaker 3: I'd rather that because that also allows.

809
00:40:04,520 --> 00:40:06,919
Speaker 4: The things that I do see on Facebook or Twitter

810
00:40:07,000 --> 00:40:09,799
Speaker 4: or wherever to be the people who I want to see.

811
00:40:09,840 --> 00:40:12,719
Speaker 4: And there's a thing about the five people that you

812
00:40:12,760 --> 00:40:15,120
Speaker 4: spend the most time with, or however many it is,

813
00:40:15,520 --> 00:40:18,279
Speaker 4: they are the people that you are most like so

814
00:40:18,320 --> 00:40:22,920
Speaker 4: if you yourself become more more grateful, more focused on

815
00:40:23,480 --> 00:40:26,560
Speaker 4: seeing what are the positive things, what are the things

816
00:40:26,560 --> 00:40:27,400
Speaker 4: that you're enjoying?

817
00:40:27,560 --> 00:40:29,920
Speaker 3: Who do you want to engage with us, That's why.

818
00:40:29,760 --> 00:40:32,080
Speaker 4: You will see it in other people. You'd be like, oh,

819
00:40:32,160 --> 00:40:34,440
Speaker 4: and you'll notice when it's not happening. You can be

820
00:40:34,840 --> 00:40:40,160
Speaker 4: that person that therapeutic, warm, hospitable, generous, gracious presence in

821
00:40:40,280 --> 00:40:43,560
Speaker 4: the lives of your friends and hopefully that can continue

822
00:40:43,800 --> 00:40:45,480
Speaker 4: to you know, move forward.

823
00:40:45,560 --> 00:40:47,520
Speaker 2: Yeah, I had to lean into that, like that was

824
00:40:47,560 --> 00:40:49,840
Speaker 2: the thing for me. Was for a while, I was

825
00:40:49,920 --> 00:40:52,879
Speaker 2: kind of measuring things and like, well, with what we

826
00:40:52,960 --> 00:40:56,320
Speaker 2: do for a living, we should want to be around

827
00:40:56,360 --> 00:40:59,840
Speaker 2: the most people positive possible to like, you know, to

828
00:41:00,080 --> 00:41:02,480
Speaker 2: like because it's your sphere of influence and they'll listen

829
00:41:02,520 --> 00:41:04,680
Speaker 2: and they'll share the words and all this. But then

830
00:41:04,719 --> 00:41:06,440
Speaker 2: I realized it was taking a big toll on me

831
00:41:06,560 --> 00:41:08,680
Speaker 2: because I would be around people that I was extremely

832
00:41:08,719 --> 00:41:12,279
Speaker 2: uncomfortable around, or you know, they would just do or

833
00:41:12,280 --> 00:41:14,919
Speaker 2: say things and I was like, man, that's like maybe

834
00:41:14,920 --> 00:41:17,120
Speaker 2: they're nice to me, but they're not nice to everyone,

835
00:41:17,239 --> 00:41:19,040
Speaker 2: or something like that. And so it kind of became

836
00:41:19,080 --> 00:41:21,600
Speaker 2: a thing where it felt like it was starting to

837
00:41:21,680 --> 00:41:24,719
Speaker 2: change who I was and making me feel you know,

838
00:41:24,960 --> 00:41:27,719
Speaker 2: sick sometimes in my stomach, like physically ill. And so

839
00:41:28,760 --> 00:41:32,000
Speaker 2: I noticed as I like started embracing, like, no, these

840
00:41:32,040 --> 00:41:34,880
Speaker 2: are the values I have as a human being, like

841
00:41:35,320 --> 00:41:39,239
Speaker 2: you know, from my parents, from our relationship, from my friendships.

842
00:41:39,440 --> 00:41:41,239
Speaker 2: And I was just like, I'm gonna just this is

843
00:41:41,280 --> 00:41:43,520
Speaker 2: the person I am. I hope people like it, but

844
00:41:43,560 --> 00:41:47,080
Speaker 2: if they don't, it's like too bad, kind of like

845
00:41:47,120 --> 00:41:49,000
Speaker 2: not in a mean way, but in a like you know,

846
00:41:49,160 --> 00:41:52,799
Speaker 2: because I'm taking in more than I'm putting out and

847
00:41:52,840 --> 00:41:54,560
Speaker 2: it's or I'm putting out more than I'm taking in,

848
00:41:54,600 --> 00:41:57,640
Speaker 2: and it's actually making me sad, it's making me anxious,

849
00:41:57,640 --> 00:42:01,360
Speaker 2: making me depressed. And so when I changed, though without

850
00:42:01,480 --> 00:42:04,400
Speaker 2: even confrontation, it did change the people around me, like

851
00:42:05,120 --> 00:42:07,400
Speaker 2: the people that I thought about of like, man, this

852
00:42:07,400 --> 00:42:10,080
Speaker 2: person really makes me anxious, or and this person's like

853
00:42:10,239 --> 00:42:12,160
Speaker 2: so mean or so rude, or they you know, this

854
00:42:12,200 --> 00:42:14,799
Speaker 2: person talked disrespectfully to my friend or something. I'm like,

855
00:42:15,239 --> 00:42:18,120
Speaker 2: you know, those kind of people just stopped hanging out.

856
00:42:18,200 --> 00:42:22,279
Speaker 2: And it was not not a fight, it wasn't a confrontation.

857
00:42:22,520 --> 00:42:25,719
Speaker 2: It's just like their s fear just moved like they

858
00:42:25,800 --> 00:42:27,960
Speaker 2: just was like, Okay, there's nothing else left for me here,

859
00:42:28,600 --> 00:42:29,960
Speaker 2: and I think that's what you have to do.

860
00:42:30,239 --> 00:42:32,279
Speaker 6: We had this thing on our show where we read.

861
00:42:33,000 --> 00:42:36,120
Speaker 2: We used to read five star reviews of our show,

862
00:42:36,160 --> 00:42:38,600
Speaker 2: no matter what you said. So some people would use

863
00:42:38,640 --> 00:42:40,839
Speaker 2: it to troll us and it would be funny and cute,

864
00:42:40,840 --> 00:42:44,160
Speaker 2: but some people would be really mean, and so then

865
00:42:44,200 --> 00:42:46,000
Speaker 2: we had to change it, like, Okay, we'll read your

866
00:42:46,040 --> 00:42:48,120
Speaker 2: five star review, but it has to be nice, right,

867
00:42:48,239 --> 00:42:52,000
Speaker 2: And so which is much better because then only people

868
00:42:52,080 --> 00:42:53,880
Speaker 2: that like it one, only people that like it should

869
00:42:53,880 --> 00:42:56,400
Speaker 2: be writing five star reviews, but also like which is

870
00:42:56,440 --> 00:42:59,280
Speaker 2: more fair, but also like it kind of like skew

871
00:42:59,400 --> 00:43:03,200
Speaker 2: towards like a more positive experience. And then I tried

872
00:43:03,239 --> 00:43:05,880
Speaker 2: a new thing this week where someone wrote a negative review,

873
00:43:06,400 --> 00:43:08,840
Speaker 2: but instead I just on the air just changed it

874
00:43:08,840 --> 00:43:12,200
Speaker 2: to positive. And as I was three like five stars,

875
00:43:12,239 --> 00:43:15,040
Speaker 2: they loved it. That all we're the best where you are.

876
00:43:15,320 --> 00:43:18,200
Speaker 2: You loved us, and that's it's just like that is

877
00:43:18,239 --> 00:43:21,440
Speaker 2: just better for me. It's funnier, like it's you know,

878
00:43:21,520 --> 00:43:24,279
Speaker 2: I did read their negative things, so you you know,

879
00:43:24,360 --> 00:43:26,439
Speaker 2: you did get to put that inside of my heart

880
00:43:26,560 --> 00:43:28,640
Speaker 2: or whatever, but I also got to be like, I'm

881
00:43:28,680 --> 00:43:30,799
Speaker 2: gonna put some of my positive inside of your heart.

882
00:43:30,800 --> 00:43:34,080
Speaker 6: You're gonna if you're listening to this and you're like

883
00:43:34,600 --> 00:43:35,240
Speaker 6: I wanted.

884
00:43:35,040 --> 00:43:38,400
Speaker 2: Them to feel bad, well, we're a feel good show,

885
00:43:38,640 --> 00:43:41,160
Speaker 2: you know, Like it's the wrong show to try to

886
00:43:41,160 --> 00:43:42,839
Speaker 2: make us feel bad. We don't want to feel bad.

887
00:43:42,920 --> 00:43:45,359
Speaker 2: We don't want you to have to feel bad, even

888
00:43:45,400 --> 00:43:49,839
Speaker 2: if you don't like it. So, oh, one more thing,

889
00:43:49,840 --> 00:43:53,360
Speaker 2: one more thing I was gonna say. I think also,

890
00:43:54,239 --> 00:44:00,160
Speaker 2: you build community with your attitude, so you're like, it's

891
00:44:00,200 --> 00:44:02,400
Speaker 2: going to be reinforced by the people who are attracted

892
00:44:02,400 --> 00:44:07,000
Speaker 2: to your energy as well. We do TV show recaps,

893
00:44:07,719 --> 00:44:10,799
Speaker 2: and we when we do our TV show recaps, we

894
00:44:10,880 --> 00:44:14,120
Speaker 2: basically look for the positives we do so we don't

895
00:44:14,440 --> 00:44:17,480
Speaker 2: like we like, we like. It's been literally years since

896
00:44:17,480 --> 00:44:19,000
Speaker 2: we review the show where it was like, I don't

897
00:44:19,000 --> 00:44:21,800
Speaker 2: think I like this show anymore. We you know, and

898
00:44:21,960 --> 00:44:24,200
Speaker 2: so because I just it feels weird to show up

899
00:44:24,200 --> 00:44:27,120
Speaker 2: every week and be like, Okay, guys, I hated this,

900
00:44:27,239 --> 00:44:30,480
Speaker 2: but let's talk about it like as a as an entertainment.

901
00:44:30,520 --> 00:44:32,239
Speaker 2: It's not even like a thing I have to do.

902
00:44:32,320 --> 00:44:35,400
Speaker 2: It's not like you know, let's talk about my homework assignment.

903
00:44:35,400 --> 00:44:37,120
Speaker 2: I'm talking to you about a thing I chose to

904
00:44:37,160 --> 00:44:39,799
Speaker 2: take my time and write like notes for and shit,

905
00:44:40,280 --> 00:44:42,920
Speaker 2: And so I think it changed the show and it

906
00:44:43,080 --> 00:44:45,920
Speaker 2: changed like I think it separates what we do from

907
00:44:46,000 --> 00:44:48,400
Speaker 2: other shows, because you know, most shows, I think they

908
00:44:48,440 --> 00:44:50,680
Speaker 2: get into reviewing the shows and they want to do

909
00:44:50,800 --> 00:44:52,759
Speaker 2: like a you know, if I didn't like it, I

910
00:44:52,880 --> 00:44:54,920
Speaker 2: just want to like ran about what I don't like,

911
00:44:55,000 --> 00:44:57,000
Speaker 2: and if I loved it, I want to just ran

912
00:44:57,040 --> 00:44:59,480
Speaker 2: about what I love. But I think when we just go, oh,

913
00:44:59,640 --> 00:45:01,960
Speaker 2: this okay, So even if we thought the episode was

914
00:45:02,239 --> 00:45:04,600
Speaker 2: just okay or bad, look at all the fun shit

915
00:45:04,680 --> 00:45:08,160
Speaker 2: that happened. Zombies were eating people and things were flying

916
00:45:08,160 --> 00:45:10,600
Speaker 2: and as a unicorn, Like, isn't that fucking crazy? Like

917
00:45:11,000 --> 00:45:14,920
Speaker 2: I think that approach is hard for people to grasp,

918
00:45:15,760 --> 00:45:17,640
Speaker 2: you know, because we've had people that are like, uh,

919
00:45:17,719 --> 00:45:19,960
Speaker 2: you know, uh, how come you don't have as many

920
00:45:19,960 --> 00:45:22,439
Speaker 2: guests anymore? I was like, I think it's because we

921
00:45:22,600 --> 00:45:24,360
Speaker 2: know what we're doing, you know what I mean, Like,

922
00:45:24,400 --> 00:45:27,680
Speaker 2: we we're cooking the recipe of the thing, and we

923
00:45:27,760 --> 00:45:30,760
Speaker 2: know exactly what we wanted to be, and not everyone

924
00:45:31,840 --> 00:45:33,239
Speaker 2: grasp that you know, and.

925
00:45:33,160 --> 00:45:36,400
Speaker 7: Everyone gets sit nor do they understand the vibe of

926
00:45:36,680 --> 00:45:38,520
Speaker 7: what we're trying to present.

927
00:45:38,920 --> 00:45:42,120
Speaker 2: Now, Mike, are you still doing like? Cause I know

928
00:45:42,200 --> 00:45:44,719
Speaker 2: the pandemic has changed so much, but I know you

929
00:45:44,760 --> 00:45:47,640
Speaker 2: were like volunteering, going to the courthouse and all this stuff.

930
00:45:47,680 --> 00:45:49,880
Speaker 2: As it changed all of that stuff too. I imagine

931
00:45:50,000 --> 00:45:52,680
Speaker 2: New York City, I know it was shut down for

932
00:45:52,719 --> 00:45:55,279
Speaker 2: a while. I imagine it's changed a lot.

933
00:45:56,280 --> 00:45:56,400
Speaker 7: Uh.

934
00:45:56,520 --> 00:46:00,680
Speaker 4: Yes, great question. So I have so many more things

935
00:46:00,680 --> 00:46:02,319
Speaker 4: to say. I'm sure I won't get to say them all,

936
00:46:02,360 --> 00:46:03,360
Speaker 4: but I will answer.

937
00:46:03,480 --> 00:46:04,319
Speaker 6: Ahead, go ahead, and.

938
00:46:07,800 --> 00:46:09,600
Speaker 3: This one. I'll do this one first, then I'll roll

939
00:46:09,640 --> 00:46:13,560
Speaker 3: all the way back. So I I have.

940
00:46:13,960 --> 00:46:17,400
Speaker 4: My girlfriend Reni, who I live with, has asthma, and

941
00:46:17,520 --> 00:46:21,279
Speaker 4: as such, I am being extra cautious about where I'm

942
00:46:21,360 --> 00:46:26,399
Speaker 4: going outside of essential out of the house things. I've

943
00:46:26,440 --> 00:46:28,840
Speaker 4: only seen my mother once in a park, you know,

944
00:46:28,920 --> 00:46:31,799
Speaker 4: in six months. Uh, and I'm going to see her

945
00:46:31,840 --> 00:46:35,160
Speaker 4: again because I love her, and I I am out.

946
00:46:36,280 --> 00:46:39,000
Speaker 4: I'm confident that I can do that as safely as

947
00:46:39,040 --> 00:46:41,640
Speaker 4: possible in an outdoor situation before it gets you know,

948
00:46:41,719 --> 00:46:44,000
Speaker 4: too cold out to.

949
00:46:43,360 --> 00:46:44,200
Speaker 3: Do that comfortably.

950
00:46:44,480 --> 00:46:47,879
Speaker 4: But uh, so I haven't been going to I don't

951
00:46:47,880 --> 00:46:52,480
Speaker 4: actually know if court Watch nyc UH is sending.

952
00:46:52,719 --> 00:46:54,280
Speaker 3: I know that they certainly.

953
00:46:54,360 --> 00:46:56,680
Speaker 4: At the beginning of the pandemic were like, we understand

954
00:46:56,800 --> 00:47:01,239
Speaker 4: if you're not going into building, that's a good thing

955
00:47:01,239 --> 00:47:06,160
Speaker 4: to do. But what I have substituted for that those

956
00:47:06,239 --> 00:47:09,200
Speaker 4: two sessions a month that I was aiming for is

957
00:47:10,400 --> 00:47:13,440
Speaker 4: text banking activist text banking, which is actually what I

958
00:47:13,480 --> 00:47:16,439
Speaker 4: was doing right before your show now, which is why,

959
00:47:16,719 --> 00:47:18,319
Speaker 4: like it was previously.

960
00:47:18,560 --> 00:47:20,280
Speaker 3: Five pm every Tuesday.

961
00:47:20,360 --> 00:47:22,880
Speaker 4: Now it's I found out today starting six pm, so

962
00:47:22,920 --> 00:47:26,400
Speaker 4: I texted fast today then got over here. But so

963
00:47:26,480 --> 00:47:28,840
Speaker 4: now basically every Tuesday, but I can also do it

964
00:47:28,880 --> 00:47:33,479
Speaker 4: other days as well. These different organizations like People's Action

965
00:47:34,000 --> 00:47:37,280
Speaker 4: Network I think is what it's called, and Vocal and Why,

966
00:47:37,320 --> 00:47:41,880
Speaker 4: and then all these different like sibling organizations around the country,

967
00:47:41,920 --> 00:47:46,400
Speaker 4: like different local you know, city and state organizations that

968
00:47:46,480 --> 00:47:50,000
Speaker 4: are aiming to get out the vote for progressive candidates.

969
00:47:50,040 --> 00:47:50,239
Speaker 3: You know.

970
00:47:50,760 --> 00:47:54,279
Speaker 4: Ayana Presley was in the Zoom meeting today, like you know,

971
00:47:54,320 --> 00:47:57,280
Speaker 4: sort of pep talking and talking about like what the

972
00:47:57,280 --> 00:48:00,360
Speaker 4: the important work that everyone's doing. And then if you

973
00:48:00,560 --> 00:48:03,759
Speaker 4: if y'all have text banked. But it's sort of like

974
00:48:03,880 --> 00:48:06,560
Speaker 4: like phone banking, like you know, you might imagine, you know,

975
00:48:06,960 --> 00:48:09,160
Speaker 4: calling people being like, hey, who are you voting for it?

976
00:48:09,320 --> 00:48:11,560
Speaker 4: Have you heard about this latest thing? Like please end

977
00:48:11,600 --> 00:48:15,960
Speaker 4: mass incarceration, Please don't incarcerat anybody, please no racism, et cetera.

978
00:48:17,320 --> 00:48:21,400
Speaker 4: Text banking, maybe you've gotten texts that are like, hey, Rod,

979
00:48:22,200 --> 00:48:26,000
Speaker 4: this is a person with this organization. Have you gotten

980
00:48:26,040 --> 00:48:28,480
Speaker 4: your mail in ballot? Who are you voting for? Have

981
00:48:28,600 --> 00:48:30,800
Speaker 4: you heard about these issues? And then if you write

982
00:48:30,840 --> 00:48:33,879
Speaker 4: back yes or no or leave me alone, then you'll

983
00:48:33,920 --> 00:48:36,600
Speaker 4: get either a text back or not. And so I'm

984
00:48:36,600 --> 00:48:39,839
Speaker 4: one of the people sometimes on the other end of

985
00:48:40,160 --> 00:48:43,400
Speaker 4: those texts. Now, So there's like some templates you know

986
00:48:43,600 --> 00:48:46,719
Speaker 4: that like, well, we'll go out to be like, you know,

987
00:48:46,880 --> 00:48:49,480
Speaker 4: who are you voting for, like you know, one Trump

988
00:48:49,520 --> 00:48:52,279
Speaker 4: to five Biden? And then depending on what people right back,

989
00:48:52,280 --> 00:48:55,880
Speaker 4: there are different questions. If they say don't contact me

990
00:48:56,000 --> 00:48:59,360
Speaker 4: or stop texting or stop in all capitals, then we

991
00:48:59,360 --> 00:49:00,880
Speaker 4: we opt them out out immediately.

992
00:49:01,320 --> 00:49:03,280
Speaker 3: But if people respond, then.

993
00:49:03,560 --> 00:49:07,600
Speaker 4: Uh, there are certain like uh canned answers for like

994
00:49:07,640 --> 00:49:09,600
Speaker 4: how did you get my number? Or like I moved

995
00:49:09,760 --> 00:49:12,840
Speaker 4: or wrong number or just yes or no, I'm like,

996
00:49:12,880 --> 00:49:15,359
Speaker 4: well great, here's where to put your ballad, here's how

997
00:49:15,400 --> 00:49:17,839
Speaker 4: to order an absentee ballad, here's how to do this,

998
00:49:18,200 --> 00:49:20,239
Speaker 4: And then sometimes they ask questions and then there are

999
00:49:20,280 --> 00:49:22,440
Speaker 4: actual legit conversations.

1000
00:49:22,640 --> 00:49:24,000
Speaker 3: Some of my favorite things are.

1001
00:49:23,840 --> 00:49:25,880
Speaker 4: Though, like if it's like, hey, if you thought about, uh,

1002
00:49:25,920 --> 00:49:28,520
Speaker 4: are you going to be supporting this, you know, democratic candidate,

1003
00:49:28,520 --> 00:49:31,560
Speaker 4: this progressive candidate. If they're like hell no, mega, then

1004
00:49:31,560 --> 00:49:33,480
Speaker 4: there's like an option where I click and it's just like,

1005
00:49:33,560 --> 00:49:37,880
Speaker 4: thank you for sharing, have a great dad. And sometimes

1006
00:49:37,920 --> 00:49:39,840
Speaker 4: they're just like, suck my ass. I'm like, thank you

1007
00:49:39,880 --> 00:49:41,080
Speaker 4: for sharing, have a great day.

1008
00:49:41,120 --> 00:49:42,800
Speaker 5: You know, I wish you could.

1009
00:49:42,880 --> 00:49:46,560
Speaker 2: I wish it was I wish you could respond, and

1010
00:49:46,680 --> 00:49:50,560
Speaker 2: Mike Kathlan text you know what I mean? Like yeah,

1011
00:49:50,600 --> 00:49:54,040
Speaker 2: Like like if they send something like that, like when

1012
00:49:54,120 --> 00:49:56,440
Speaker 2: was America great? What exactly is great about it? What

1013
00:49:56,480 --> 00:49:58,399
Speaker 2: would you like to be? What do you mean by

1014
00:49:58,440 --> 00:50:00,960
Speaker 2: a great again? Which part you know? Like I love?

1015
00:50:01,320 --> 00:50:04,359
Speaker 2: Like that would be more of a significant Like then

1016
00:50:04,400 --> 00:50:06,080
Speaker 2: they would be like stop, take me off.

1017
00:50:06,880 --> 00:50:11,080
Speaker 4: You know. It's a funny thing because speaking like based

1018
00:50:11,080 --> 00:50:13,680
Speaker 4: on what we've been talking about, sometimes I will like

1019
00:50:13,719 --> 00:50:16,360
Speaker 4: there are people who will want to I don't know

1020
00:50:16,360 --> 00:50:18,400
Speaker 4: if this was like a real if this was a

1021
00:50:18,440 --> 00:50:21,040
Speaker 4: real person or like a troll or what it was,

1022
00:50:21,200 --> 00:50:23,719
Speaker 4: but a person was I wonder if I could find

1023
00:50:23,760 --> 00:50:25,920
Speaker 4: it because I think I took it down, but it's

1024
00:50:25,920 --> 00:50:29,360
Speaker 4: in my email somewhere. But somebody was like, I'm sorry,

1025
00:50:29,560 --> 00:50:33,439
Speaker 4: I'm not going to be voting for this candidate who

1026
00:50:33,480 --> 00:50:35,840
Speaker 4: supports this progressive cause.

1027
00:50:36,080 --> 00:50:37,400
Speaker 3: And I was like, come on, why not?

1028
00:50:37,440 --> 00:50:40,600
Speaker 4: And they're like, because it's not progressive enough. Did you

1029
00:50:40,680 --> 00:50:44,759
Speaker 4: ever think about how the Democratic Party is pro slavery

1030
00:50:44,960 --> 00:50:49,239
Speaker 4: and like and are saying black lives don't matter enough?

1031
00:50:49,280 --> 00:50:51,080
Speaker 4: And I was like, well, this is not when I

1032
00:50:51,400 --> 00:50:54,200
Speaker 4: was really all geared up with all of the like,

1033
00:50:54,239 --> 00:50:56,880
Speaker 4: you know, the most left wing time points that I

1034
00:50:57,080 --> 00:51:00,440
Speaker 4: had available and that they were like, have you And

1035
00:51:00,480 --> 00:51:02,880
Speaker 4: I'm like, because I'm a person who for sure, like

1036
00:51:02,960 --> 00:51:06,080
Speaker 4: I have friends who are like, but don't we need

1037
00:51:06,200 --> 00:51:09,360
Speaker 4: police when there is a violent crime?

1038
00:51:09,560 --> 00:51:11,719
Speaker 3: And I'm like, that is the thing that happens. Like

1039
00:51:11,920 --> 00:51:12,600
Speaker 3: it's like those.

1040
00:51:12,440 --> 00:51:15,640
Speaker 4: Are like the people who are saying doesn't shouldn't plan parentshood,

1041
00:51:15,880 --> 00:51:18,680
Speaker 4: not do abortions, Like that's literally three percent of what

1042
00:51:18,719 --> 00:51:21,160
Speaker 4: they're doing right, and they're being called like it's like

1043
00:51:21,480 --> 00:51:24,960
Speaker 4: not the conversation that needs to happen when the thing

1044
00:51:25,000 --> 00:51:27,840
Speaker 4: that they are doing the most is not is getting

1045
00:51:28,040 --> 00:51:30,839
Speaker 4: the least, Like yeah, when what they're doing.

1046
00:51:31,120 --> 00:51:34,040
Speaker 2: Did you see the thing with Alyssa Milano where uh

1047
00:51:34,200 --> 00:51:36,239
Speaker 2: she called the police on someone I had like a

1048
00:51:36,520 --> 00:51:38,520
Speaker 2: a boy that had a BB Like she thought it

1049
00:51:38,600 --> 00:51:41,239
Speaker 2: was a guy with a gun our yard. It turned

1050
00:51:41,280 --> 00:51:43,200
Speaker 2: out to be a kid with a BB gun shooting

1051
00:51:43,200 --> 00:51:49,000
Speaker 2: at squirrels. And but people were presented like this hypocritical motherfucker,

1052
00:51:49,280 --> 00:51:51,160
Speaker 2: she says, defund the police.

1053
00:51:51,360 --> 00:51:53,719
Speaker 6: But then she called them for someone with a gun

1054
00:51:53,719 --> 00:51:54,400
Speaker 6: on her property.

1055
00:51:54,560 --> 00:51:57,919
Speaker 2: Ha ha, And I was like, that's not the hypocritical

1056
00:51:57,960 --> 00:52:01,640
Speaker 2: at all, Like like if someone in their job, if

1057
00:52:02,040 --> 00:52:05,800
Speaker 2: like number one, if someone had a weapon on your property,

1058
00:52:06,320 --> 00:52:09,400
Speaker 2: that is probably when you would want a police officer

1059
00:52:09,440 --> 00:52:11,880
Speaker 2: to show up, right, That's that's just number one, like

1060
00:52:11,920 --> 00:52:14,320
Speaker 2: of of the the range of things that can happen.

1061
00:52:14,760 --> 00:52:20,479
Speaker 2: But also like because we don't have resources for shit

1062
00:52:20,600 --> 00:52:24,400
Speaker 2: other than police, you have it where they're showing up

1063
00:52:24,400 --> 00:52:27,520
Speaker 2: for everything. Oh my, my friends having a mental health

1064
00:52:27,560 --> 00:52:31,160
Speaker 2: crisis problem, Here come people with guns. Oh my, you know,

1065
00:52:31,280 --> 00:52:33,040
Speaker 2: my cat got stuck up a tree. Here comes some

1066
00:52:33,040 --> 00:52:35,719
Speaker 2: people with some guns, like his death like that like

1067
00:52:35,800 --> 00:52:38,520
Speaker 2: it they thought they had like a gotcha moment, but

1068
00:52:38,560 --> 00:52:39,760
Speaker 2: it's so fucking stupid.

1069
00:52:39,800 --> 00:52:43,640
Speaker 6: I'm sorry interrupt, but it's.

1070
00:52:42,880 --> 00:52:43,680
Speaker 3: One hundred percent.

1071
00:52:43,880 --> 00:52:46,640
Speaker 4: I mean, it seems weird that there there should be

1072
00:52:47,200 --> 00:52:51,880
Speaker 4: like different there's different emergencies, there should be different emergency numbers,

1073
00:52:51,920 --> 00:52:55,080
Speaker 4: Like why is it that, like if somebody needs medical help,

1074
00:52:55,120 --> 00:52:59,359
Speaker 4: like there's police and fire and ambulances possible, Like the

1075
00:52:59,400 --> 00:53:03,080
Speaker 4: sirens have different music also so you can know, like

1076
00:53:03,320 --> 00:53:05,319
Speaker 4: is that one that's helping people or is that one

1077
00:53:05,320 --> 00:53:09,200
Speaker 4: that I'm mad at? You know, and like there's so yeah,

1078
00:53:09,280 --> 00:53:12,799
Speaker 4: I have been doing. Like there's a comedian Nato Green,

1079
00:53:12,840 --> 00:53:15,320
Speaker 4: who I like a lot, who also like as a

1080
00:53:15,400 --> 00:53:17,960
Speaker 4: day job, works as like a union organizer. And he's

1081
00:53:18,000 --> 00:53:21,160
Speaker 4: a guy who I'm like, how much should I be

1082
00:53:21,320 --> 00:53:22,439
Speaker 4: doing to help?

1083
00:53:22,560 --> 00:53:23,680
Speaker 3: Like how how much?

1084
00:53:23,760 --> 00:53:27,240
Speaker 4: Because I you know, we all want to help others

1085
00:53:27,520 --> 00:53:29,880
Speaker 4: and live our own lives, and I don't want.

1086
00:53:29,719 --> 00:53:32,160
Speaker 3: To speak for everyone. There's a thing you said earlier.

1087
00:53:32,000 --> 00:53:35,200
Speaker 4: Like everyone will agree with this, ied everyone to agree,

1088
00:53:35,239 --> 00:53:39,560
Speaker 4: everyone should agree. There is this thing buddhism. Buddhism makes

1089
00:53:39,560 --> 00:53:43,320
Speaker 4: this claim that what everyone wants, what every individual wants

1090
00:53:43,440 --> 00:53:46,479
Speaker 4: is to increase happiness and.

1091
00:53:46,520 --> 00:53:49,200
Speaker 3: Decrease suffering for themselves.

1092
00:53:49,520 --> 00:53:52,160
Speaker 4: And so that seems like that's where all of this

1093
00:53:52,200 --> 00:53:54,400
Speaker 4: is coming from, everything that any one of us does,

1094
00:53:54,560 --> 00:53:56,719
Speaker 4: whether even if people are like no, a happiness isn't

1095
00:53:56,760 --> 00:53:59,400
Speaker 4: for me, no, thank you, like they really they want

1096
00:53:59,440 --> 00:54:04,240
Speaker 4: to feel better and have like love is the definition

1097
00:54:04,280 --> 00:54:07,200
Speaker 4: of love in Buddhism is when you love someone, you

1098
00:54:07,280 --> 00:54:10,040
Speaker 4: wish for their happiness to increase. And the definition of

1099
00:54:10,120 --> 00:54:13,600
Speaker 4: compassion in Buddhism is when you are compassionate is when

1100
00:54:13,600 --> 00:54:16,360
Speaker 4: you wish for their suffering to decrease.

1101
00:54:16,719 --> 00:54:18,520
Speaker 3: So that's the the only.

1102
00:54:18,320 --> 00:54:21,120
Speaker 4: Things that really like, that's that's all of it, like

1103
00:54:21,440 --> 00:54:26,160
Speaker 4: increasing our own and others happiness and decreasing our own

1104
00:54:26,200 --> 00:54:29,960
Speaker 4: and others suffering. And so just to get to uh,

1105
00:54:30,320 --> 00:54:32,799
Speaker 4: that is why I asked, I asked Nato, I'm like,

1106
00:54:33,120 --> 00:54:35,400
Speaker 4: how much can I be? Because like if you you

1107
00:54:35,440 --> 00:54:37,520
Speaker 4: put on your oxygem ask first you're like, you got

1108
00:54:37,520 --> 00:54:40,239
Speaker 4: to be able to hopefully breathe, you have to have

1109
00:54:40,440 --> 00:54:43,320
Speaker 4: enough food to live, you have to hopefully be able

1110
00:54:43,360 --> 00:54:47,000
Speaker 4: to pay for rent or your shelter or whatever you're doing.

1111
00:54:47,400 --> 00:54:50,960
Speaker 4: And then like once your you know Maslow's hierarchy of

1112
00:54:51,000 --> 00:54:53,839
Speaker 4: needs are taken care of, Like, then what can I do?

1113
00:54:54,080 --> 00:54:56,680
Speaker 4: How much time, how much money, how much effort? How

1114
00:54:56,680 --> 00:54:58,800
Speaker 4: many resources can I dedicate?

1115
00:54:59,000 --> 00:54:59,920
Speaker 3: And NATO said to me.

1116
00:54:59,880 --> 00:55:01,919
Speaker 4: So something like I think like five hours a week

1117
00:55:01,960 --> 00:55:04,400
Speaker 4: would be good, you know, five hours a week, like

1118
00:55:04,480 --> 00:55:08,240
Speaker 4: just an hour a day on each of your days

1119
00:55:08,320 --> 00:55:09,560
Speaker 4: that your your work days.

1120
00:55:10,000 --> 00:55:11,799
Speaker 3: And I don't always live up to that.

1121
00:55:11,840 --> 00:55:15,560
Speaker 4: I strive to like the it feels good to when

1122
00:55:15,640 --> 00:55:19,440
Speaker 4: the communities that are asking for help or volunteers or

1123
00:55:19,480 --> 00:55:23,360
Speaker 4: assistants are making offers and saying like, like the texting

1124
00:55:23,440 --> 00:55:27,040
Speaker 4: people are like, can you commit to sending two thousand

1125
00:55:27,080 --> 00:55:29,839
Speaker 4: texts a week? And like, just in the past hour

1126
00:55:29,920 --> 00:55:33,000
Speaker 4: before I got here, I sent like three thousand and

1127
00:55:33,040 --> 00:55:36,479
Speaker 4: then they don't all get answered, but of the ones

1128
00:55:36,520 --> 00:55:39,160
Speaker 4: that get answered, the dozens that get answered, Like then

1129
00:55:39,200 --> 00:55:42,440
Speaker 4: I send back ones as well, And so I do

1130
00:55:42,520 --> 00:55:44,440
Speaker 4: that at least once a week if not, and like

1131
00:55:44,640 --> 00:55:47,640
Speaker 4: it feels good too. That's what they're asking for and

1132
00:55:47,680 --> 00:55:50,560
Speaker 4: that's what I'm providing, Like I can do at least that.

1133
00:55:50,640 --> 00:55:52,240
Speaker 4: And then if like, well, if you have more time,

1134
00:55:52,600 --> 00:55:55,080
Speaker 4: like if you do what somebody asks and they're like, well,

1135
00:55:55,120 --> 00:55:57,239
Speaker 4: if you did that, can you do this, Can you

1136
00:55:57,320 --> 00:55:57,759
Speaker 4: level up?

1137
00:55:57,800 --> 00:56:01,520
Speaker 3: Can you also do this? Like I'm I can I

1138
00:56:01,560 --> 00:56:04,319
Speaker 3: can always do more. There's maybe I've shared this before.

1139
00:56:04,360 --> 00:56:08,319
Speaker 4: The zen master Shunryu Suzuki said to his students. He said,

1140
00:56:08,640 --> 00:56:12,200
Speaker 4: you are all perfect exactly as you are, and you

1141
00:56:12,239 --> 00:56:13,400
Speaker 4: could all stand to.

1142
00:56:13,440 --> 00:56:16,280
Speaker 3: Use some improvement. That's all about we're.

1143
00:56:16,080 --> 00:56:19,279
Speaker 4: All doing the best that we could given what we've

1144
00:56:19,320 --> 00:56:22,600
Speaker 4: had up to this point, and also we can do better.

1145
00:56:23,040 --> 00:56:26,840
Speaker 4: And those are both true things. Have you guys seen

1146
00:56:27,160 --> 00:56:30,160
Speaker 4: uh Russell Brand did a podcast with Brene Brown and

1147
00:56:30,160 --> 00:56:31,719
Speaker 4: I don't know if you're y'all are into both of them,

1148
00:56:31,760 --> 00:56:32,200
Speaker 4: but they're all.

1149
00:56:32,239 --> 00:56:33,040
Speaker 3: I love them both.

1150
00:56:33,480 --> 00:56:36,160
Speaker 4: And so Brene Brown does research.

1151
00:56:36,040 --> 00:56:38,239
Speaker 3: Into compassion and one of the things that she.

1152
00:56:38,280 --> 00:56:42,040
Speaker 4: Found, she said, in researching compassionate people is the two

1153
00:56:42,080 --> 00:56:44,919
Speaker 4: things that compassionate people have in common. They're more likely

1154
00:56:45,400 --> 00:56:50,160
Speaker 4: to believe truly that everyone is doing their best, and

1155
00:56:50,280 --> 00:56:54,120
Speaker 4: number two, they are more likely to have good boundaries,

1156
00:56:54,440 --> 00:56:57,120
Speaker 4: which is why they're able to then be compassionate because

1157
00:56:57,120 --> 00:56:59,200
Speaker 4: they're like, look, this is this is what I can

1158
00:56:59,239 --> 00:57:02,160
Speaker 4: do in my life. I need to do this for

1159
00:57:02,239 --> 00:57:04,840
Speaker 4: myself and then I can do this for other people.

1160
00:57:05,120 --> 00:57:07,640
Speaker 3: She gave the example of a.

1161
00:57:07,600 --> 00:57:11,680
Speaker 4: Woman in an abusive relationship who's if she's compassionate and

1162
00:57:11,840 --> 00:57:14,760
Speaker 4: truly believes that her abuser.

1163
00:57:14,600 --> 00:57:18,000
Speaker 3: Is doing their best, she's more likely to leave.

1164
00:57:18,120 --> 00:57:21,440
Speaker 4: Because that's not good, that's not okay, that's not safe.

1165
00:57:21,640 --> 00:57:24,960
Speaker 4: If she believes he right now could be doing better,

1166
00:57:25,080 --> 00:57:28,360
Speaker 4: he's not. He can't be doing better right now, and

1167
00:57:28,680 --> 00:57:32,440
Speaker 4: up to this point, if he's been harming her, likely

1168
00:57:32,560 --> 00:57:36,480
Speaker 4: in the predominant number of cases, it's a man abusing

1169
00:57:36,720 --> 00:57:40,240
Speaker 4: a woman. Of course, all genders are capable of being

1170
00:57:40,280 --> 00:57:43,680
Speaker 4: in either position, but if you're being abused, it's not

1171
00:57:43,840 --> 00:57:47,720
Speaker 4: your role in that moment to from that place be

1172
00:57:48,360 --> 00:57:51,760
Speaker 4: forgiving and be there you can forgive the person from

1173
00:57:51,800 --> 00:57:52,640
Speaker 4: far away is.

1174
00:57:52,600 --> 00:57:54,200
Speaker 3: A thing you can do, I think.

1175
00:57:54,320 --> 00:57:58,200
Speaker 2: I think also is hard for people because I know

1176
00:57:58,320 --> 00:58:01,240
Speaker 2: we talk about on the show sometimes uh we'll get

1177
00:58:01,280 --> 00:58:04,760
Speaker 2: feedback or I actually stop really discussing this kind of

1178
00:58:04,760 --> 00:58:07,439
Speaker 2: shit on social media that much. But like a lot

1179
00:58:07,480 --> 00:58:10,320
Speaker 2: of times, I don't harbor any ill will towards people

1180
00:58:10,400 --> 00:58:13,280
Speaker 2: that forgive people I mean either, but it feels like

1181
00:58:13,680 --> 00:58:16,640
Speaker 2: we've kind of gone the other way to because for

1182
00:58:17,080 --> 00:58:21,320
Speaker 2: especially racially like being black, forgiving people who have harmed

1183
00:58:21,360 --> 00:58:24,120
Speaker 2: you as is like a thing that you know, for

1184
00:58:24,200 --> 00:58:26,440
Speaker 2: self preservation has had to be frowned upon, right like,

1185
00:58:26,880 --> 00:58:29,880
Speaker 2: because people because it's like something racist would happen, someone

1186
00:58:29,920 --> 00:58:32,200
Speaker 2: would get you know, up to like death and stuff,

1187
00:58:32,200 --> 00:58:34,120
Speaker 2: and then they come to survivors and be like, so

1188
00:58:34,160 --> 00:58:35,040
Speaker 2: do you forgive the people?

1189
00:58:35,080 --> 00:58:37,400
Speaker 6: And so now we have like now that we can

1190
00:58:37,640 --> 00:58:38,600
Speaker 6: like have more.

1191
00:58:38,480 --> 00:58:41,360
Speaker 2: Ability to speak for ourselves as black people were like no, no, no, no,

1192
00:58:41,400 --> 00:58:44,320
Speaker 2: slow down on that shit. I freedom for me is

1193
00:58:44,360 --> 00:58:48,560
Speaker 2: saying fuck this person forever, right But for me sometimes

1194
00:58:48,600 --> 00:58:52,080
Speaker 2: like it becomes its pressure, Like every circumstance you have

1195
00:58:52,160 --> 00:58:54,440
Speaker 2: to be very unforgiving, like or else shit out of

1196
00:58:54,680 --> 00:58:57,360
Speaker 2: line with everyone else. So when I see people like

1197
00:58:57,760 --> 00:58:59,680
Speaker 2: Christian Cooper, the guy who was in the park with

1198
00:58:59,800 --> 00:59:03,320
Speaker 2: the bird watching and stuff, and he didn't necessarily say

1199
00:59:03,320 --> 00:59:05,280
Speaker 2: he forgave Amy Cooper, but he just was more like,

1200
00:59:05,800 --> 00:59:09,000
Speaker 2: I don't want to participate in the persecution of this woman,

1201
00:59:09,160 --> 00:59:11,920
Speaker 2: right like I like I what she did was messed up.

1202
00:59:12,200 --> 00:59:15,320
Speaker 2: I got her to stop doing the thing.

1203
00:59:17,520 --> 00:59:20,400
Speaker 6: For him, that was where it ended, like the thing

1204
00:59:20,560 --> 00:59:21,360
Speaker 6: like that moment.

1205
00:59:21,440 --> 00:59:24,680
Speaker 2: But for us, you know, outside of him, all these

1206
00:59:24,680 --> 00:59:26,640
Speaker 2: people in the world, it was just the start of

1207
00:59:26,680 --> 00:59:28,320
Speaker 2: like what we want to see happened in this woman,

1208
00:59:28,360 --> 00:59:30,400
Speaker 2: and they want to pass a new law, and they

1209
00:59:30,400 --> 00:59:34,400
Speaker 2: wanted to like go to jail and stuff. There was

1210
00:59:34,640 --> 00:59:37,480
Speaker 2: both of them, John who was killed in his apartment

1211
00:59:37,520 --> 00:59:41,720
Speaker 2: by Amy something uh, the cop who went in the

1212
00:59:41,760 --> 00:59:45,480
Speaker 2: wrong apartment, but her his brother hugged the cop, Amy

1213
00:59:45,480 --> 00:59:50,120
Speaker 2: Geiger hugged her at his trial at her trial, and

1214
00:59:50,600 --> 00:59:53,760
Speaker 2: same thing. Like I don't know any Like, I don't

1215
00:59:53,760 --> 00:59:56,160
Speaker 2: think there's anything wrong with him doing that. I think,

1216
00:59:56,560 --> 00:59:59,600
Speaker 2: you know, if he personally needs to do that to

1217
01:00:00,720 --> 01:00:03,320
Speaker 2: make sense of this thing that happened that he had

1218
01:00:03,400 --> 01:00:05,600
Speaker 2: nothing to do with, Like he's not complicit in it

1219
01:00:05,600 --> 01:00:08,640
Speaker 2: any way, That doesn't bother me. But I feel like

1220
01:00:09,000 --> 01:00:13,760
Speaker 2: we're kind of gearing up or leaning towards like that

1221
01:00:13,920 --> 01:00:16,960
Speaker 2: is now the wrong it's considered the wrong thing to do,

1222
01:00:17,080 --> 01:00:20,120
Speaker 2: not the choice that you made. But like you were,

1223
01:00:20,400 --> 01:00:22,360
Speaker 2: there's a right and wrong in this situation. You made

1224
01:00:22,440 --> 01:00:26,560
Speaker 2: the wrong choice to forgive on a personal level, And

1225
01:00:26,600 --> 01:00:30,160
Speaker 2: I think that comes from compassion, that comes from believing

1226
01:00:31,080 --> 01:00:34,240
Speaker 2: deep down that even when someone makes a mistake, even

1227
01:00:34,240 --> 01:00:37,880
Speaker 2: when they do something really foul, that on some level,

1228
01:00:37,920 --> 01:00:41,200
Speaker 2: there's still a human being and that they're still like

1229
01:00:41,320 --> 01:00:44,400
Speaker 2: whatever their struggles and trauma are, those are real to

1230
01:00:44,520 --> 01:00:46,760
Speaker 2: them and they're still going through it and maybe that

1231
01:00:46,920 --> 01:00:51,640
Speaker 2: is their best at that moment, even though it's clearly

1232
01:00:51,680 --> 01:00:55,919
Speaker 2: not satisfactory to you. And I think especially for people

1233
01:00:55,960 --> 01:00:59,840
Speaker 2: who want to believe in like prison abolition, who want

1234
01:00:59,840 --> 01:01:03,240
Speaker 2: to believe in police uh, defunding, want to believe in

1235
01:01:03,880 --> 01:01:06,920
Speaker 2: all these righteous things, that is going to be the

1236
01:01:06,960 --> 01:01:10,400
Speaker 2: core of it. And I think people want to talk

1237
01:01:10,400 --> 01:01:13,000
Speaker 2: around it, but like the core of it is gonna

1238
01:01:13,000 --> 01:01:14,560
Speaker 2: have to be a society that sees people who make

1239
01:01:14,600 --> 01:01:18,000
Speaker 2: mistakes and goes, you're still a person of value and

1240
01:01:19,360 --> 01:01:23,560
Speaker 2: redeemable or at least something to where your worth doesn't

1241
01:01:23,640 --> 01:01:25,600
Speaker 2: end because you made this act and now it's over.

1242
01:01:26,040 --> 01:01:27,560
Speaker 2: But I think that's a thing that's going to be

1243
01:01:27,680 --> 01:01:29,640
Speaker 2: very hard for society to change around.

1244
01:01:30,680 --> 01:01:35,080
Speaker 4: Well, I think that you're doing a great job. And

1245
01:01:35,440 --> 01:01:40,040
Speaker 4: like as evidenced here by you forgiving Christian is a

1246
01:01:40,120 --> 01:01:44,919
Speaker 4: Christian Cooper, Yeah, or you're you're forgiving him, for forgiving her,

1247
01:01:46,440 --> 01:01:50,480
Speaker 4: You're forgiving Botam John's brother, for forgiving the cop. I mean,

1248
01:01:50,920 --> 01:01:53,240
Speaker 4: the thing I think that you said earlier is so

1249
01:01:53,360 --> 01:01:57,200
Speaker 4: relevant to this, which is that it's a personal thing

1250
01:01:57,720 --> 01:02:03,240
Speaker 4: that if if somebody, if howbody wrongs you, and you like,

1251
01:02:03,400 --> 01:02:07,920
Speaker 4: here's the thing also like, forgiveness in its optimal circumstances

1252
01:02:08,520 --> 01:02:12,000
Speaker 4: is a two way situation where the person who did

1253
01:02:12,040 --> 01:02:17,360
Speaker 4: the wronging takes responsibility and apologizes and does their best

1254
01:02:17,400 --> 01:02:21,720
Speaker 4: to make amends, to do whatever they can for their victim,

1255
01:02:21,880 --> 01:02:26,440
Speaker 4: for the community to demonstrate, not just to demonstrate, but

1256
01:02:26,520 --> 01:02:31,160
Speaker 4: just to enact change, and to show that there has

1257
01:02:31,280 --> 01:02:34,640
Speaker 4: been understanding and that doesn't always happen. But when that

1258
01:02:34,680 --> 01:02:39,360
Speaker 4: doesn't happen, the person on the forgiving side, who like

1259
01:02:39,400 --> 01:02:43,240
Speaker 4: nobody is obligated to forgive. But do you know there's

1260
01:02:43,240 --> 01:02:44,480
Speaker 4: a thing that I've heard that I like a lot,

1261
01:02:44,520 --> 01:02:47,720
Speaker 4: that's life becomes easier when you learn to accept an

1262
01:02:47,760 --> 01:02:52,360
Speaker 4: apology that hasn't been given. Yeah, and like which goes

1263
01:02:52,360 --> 01:02:55,640
Speaker 4: along with the thing that you've probably heard that maybe

1264
01:02:55,680 --> 01:02:59,240
Speaker 4: I've talked about here before, but they say that holding

1265
01:02:59,280 --> 01:03:02,360
Speaker 4: a grudge is like taking poison and waiting for the

1266
01:03:02,400 --> 01:03:03,560
Speaker 4: other person to die.

1267
01:03:03,960 --> 01:03:06,000
Speaker 3: Yeah, And I.

1268
01:03:06,000 --> 01:03:08,680
Speaker 4: Would add on top of that, this is like, you know,

1269
01:03:08,720 --> 01:03:12,360
Speaker 4: above and beyond extra credit on the flip side of it,

1270
01:03:13,000 --> 01:03:16,840
Speaker 4: forgiveness in a way, forgiveness and compassion and seeing people

1271
01:03:17,040 --> 01:03:21,480
Speaker 4: as a human being. As you've just described, that is

1272
01:03:21,560 --> 01:03:25,720
Speaker 4: like taking vitamins or medicine and hoping that the other

1273
01:03:25,840 --> 01:03:29,840
Speaker 4: person's health improves, which sometimes does help, but even if

1274
01:03:29,840 --> 01:03:33,720
Speaker 4: it doesn't improve their health, it does improve hours to

1275
01:03:33,880 --> 01:03:35,040
Speaker 4: know that they were.

1276
01:03:34,880 --> 01:03:36,720
Speaker 3: A baby, they are a human.

1277
01:03:37,120 --> 01:03:40,520
Speaker 4: They their best might not be our favorite, but they've

1278
01:03:40,760 --> 01:03:44,280
Speaker 4: they didn't. Nobody gets into life and they people talk

1279
01:03:44,280 --> 01:03:45,920
Speaker 4: about it a lot about when you're a kid, and

1280
01:03:45,960 --> 01:03:48,000
Speaker 4: they're like, nobody grew up saying that they wanted to

1281
01:03:48,040 --> 01:03:50,520
Speaker 4: be a whatever it is, you know, like a job

1282
01:03:50,600 --> 01:03:53,800
Speaker 4: that people judge, but like nobody as a kid, there's

1283
01:03:53,800 --> 01:03:56,880
Speaker 4: so nobody was born thinking like, oh, I'm going to

1284
01:03:56,920 --> 01:04:00,160
Speaker 4: grow up and then do this you know, heinous thing,

1285
01:04:00,200 --> 01:04:04,000
Speaker 4: this crime, this harm, this horrendous thing. Like there are

1286
01:04:04,040 --> 01:04:08,720
Speaker 4: traumas and harms that are delivered to everyone as a child,

1287
01:04:08,760 --> 01:04:14,160
Speaker 4: perhaps even before perhaps generationally whatever it is, like, there

1288
01:04:14,160 --> 01:04:17,720
Speaker 4: are things that are beyond our individual control.

1289
01:04:18,120 --> 01:04:19,800
Speaker 3: And it's an here.

1290
01:04:19,840 --> 01:04:23,760
Speaker 4: I'm not telling anyone how to behave or think or

1291
01:04:23,920 --> 01:04:27,120
Speaker 4: act because I can only do it for myself. So

1292
01:04:27,240 --> 01:04:30,040
Speaker 4: I can tell you that it resonates with me when

1293
01:04:30,080 --> 01:04:32,360
Speaker 4: you see somebody forgiving, Like I was talking recently on

1294
01:04:32,400 --> 01:04:39,560
Speaker 4: a podcast about Megan Ganz who forgave Dan Harmon for mistreating.

1295
01:04:38,920 --> 01:04:41,240
Speaker 3: Her and he apology.

1296
01:04:41,280 --> 01:04:44,160
Speaker 4: He came out with perhaps one of the one of

1297
01:04:44,200 --> 01:04:49,240
Speaker 4: the better apologies in the me too era. And one

1298
01:04:49,320 --> 01:04:52,160
Speaker 4: of the reasons I think that it's so noteworthy is that.

1299
01:04:52,200 --> 01:04:54,960
Speaker 3: She publicly accepted the apology.

1300
01:04:55,160 --> 01:04:58,720
Speaker 4: It seemed like he took responsibility, He didn't make excuses,

1301
01:04:58,960 --> 01:05:03,640
Speaker 4: He admitted ondoing and that was and and he apologized,

1302
01:05:03,640 --> 01:05:07,160
Speaker 4: and that was what she wanted. And it's certainly not

1303
01:05:07,400 --> 01:05:11,920
Speaker 4: my place to say two megan gans, like, hey, you

1304
01:05:12,520 --> 01:05:16,280
Speaker 4: did the wrong thing in your own life and experience,

1305
01:05:16,280 --> 01:05:18,360
Speaker 4: because that was the thing that happened with them. It

1306
01:05:18,440 --> 01:05:22,320
Speaker 4: didn't have to be public at all, right, but I'm

1307
01:05:22,400 --> 01:05:25,600
Speaker 4: I'm grateful that they did that they did have this

1308
01:05:25,680 --> 01:05:27,680
Speaker 4: interaction like that was like, you know, I don't know,

1309
01:05:27,760 --> 01:05:29,040
Speaker 4: it's now like a hierchontry.

1310
01:05:29,240 --> 01:05:32,640
Speaker 2: Also with social media, though, like what happens is everyone

1311
01:05:33,600 --> 01:05:38,480
Speaker 2: everything is happening to other people, but it's it's everything

1312
01:05:38,520 --> 01:05:40,280
Speaker 2: on social media is about how it's happening to you.

1313
01:05:40,720 --> 01:05:42,880
Speaker 2: Mm hm, you know what I'm saying. So, like that

1314
01:05:42,960 --> 01:05:47,120
Speaker 2: situation happens between those two people and then everyone inserts

1315
01:05:47,160 --> 01:05:50,160
Speaker 2: themselves into like the situation and to be like, but

1316
01:05:50,440 --> 01:05:53,880
Speaker 2: I can withhold my forgiveness because I was like, well,

1317
01:05:53,920 --> 01:05:56,560
Speaker 2: the thing didn't necessarily happen to you. Is not that

1318
01:05:57,320 --> 01:05:59,480
Speaker 2: Like it's not as simple, Like there's not an actual

1319
01:05:59,520 --> 01:06:03,160
Speaker 2: relationship there to for there to be the two way

1320
01:06:03,160 --> 01:06:06,200
Speaker 2: street of forgiveness anyway, Like they don't know that you

1321
01:06:06,560 --> 01:06:08,640
Speaker 2: are angry at them, Like they don't have to know

1322
01:06:08,680 --> 01:06:10,360
Speaker 2: that you're angry at them. They don't actually have to

1323
01:06:10,360 --> 01:06:12,280
Speaker 2: know that you forgave them or not. You know, it's

1324
01:06:12,360 --> 01:06:15,200
Speaker 2: like a weird power trip. And I think what happens

1325
01:06:15,240 --> 01:06:21,040
Speaker 2: is that we find power in the grudge. You know, Yes,

1326
01:06:21,280 --> 01:06:23,000
Speaker 2: Like here's the thing I can have that is mine

1327
01:06:23,000 --> 01:06:25,160
Speaker 2: and know it can take it from me, and it's

1328
01:06:25,240 --> 01:06:26,479
Speaker 2: more powerful to hold onto.

1329
01:06:26,920 --> 01:06:29,919
Speaker 7: Yes, because so many people, I realize in the age

1330
01:06:29,960 --> 01:06:35,720
Speaker 7: of social media, they define themselves with grudging. They define

1331
01:06:35,880 --> 01:06:39,640
Speaker 7: themselves like like like this defines me. So if I

1332
01:06:39,800 --> 01:06:43,080
Speaker 7: let go of this, this grudge that has defined me

1333
01:06:43,240 --> 01:06:45,760
Speaker 7: because I've allowed it to define me, I've held on.

1334
01:06:45,800 --> 01:06:48,120
Speaker 5: To this and so this is this is what I present.

1335
01:06:48,200 --> 01:06:52,280
Speaker 7: If I allowed this unforgiveness, this pettiness, this bitterness, this

1336
01:06:52,440 --> 01:06:55,160
Speaker 7: hurt to define me, and I wear it like a

1337
01:06:55,200 --> 01:06:57,520
Speaker 7: cloak and it's around me, everybody can see it.

1338
01:06:58,400 --> 01:07:01,040
Speaker 5: If I decide to take it off, what am I?

1339
01:07:01,080 --> 01:07:02,280
Speaker 3: And that's that's.

1340
01:07:02,000 --> 01:07:04,200
Speaker 7: A very hard question for people to answer because that

1341
01:07:04,240 --> 01:07:07,480
Speaker 7: would require you to do some self evaluation.

1342
01:07:07,800 --> 01:07:11,320
Speaker 2: And you find community, yes, you do. Like it's it's

1343
01:07:11,400 --> 01:07:13,400
Speaker 2: kind of like if you let that go, you may

1344
01:07:13,400 --> 01:07:16,520
Speaker 2: be letting go of who people see you as and

1345
01:07:16,600 --> 01:07:20,360
Speaker 2: who you connect with. Because that's as Mike brought up earlier,

1346
01:07:21,280 --> 01:07:25,439
Speaker 2: the comments that are negative on YouTube, but also those

1347
01:07:25,480 --> 01:07:28,520
Speaker 2: comments form a community. Yes, so though you know so

1348
01:07:28,600 --> 01:07:31,439
Speaker 2: then when those people watch the next video, it's oh yeah,

1349
01:07:31,560 --> 01:07:33,200
Speaker 2: because if you look under the comments, what does every

1350
01:07:33,200 --> 01:07:36,160
Speaker 2: comment have? Other comments, replies.

1351
01:07:36,240 --> 01:07:38,320
Speaker 5: Likes, taking other people to bring them.

1352
01:07:38,200 --> 01:07:40,360
Speaker 2: Right up and down in the thing. It becomes a

1353
01:07:40,400 --> 01:07:44,240
Speaker 2: community that is fulfilled by the negatives, by what we

1354
01:07:44,360 --> 01:07:47,120
Speaker 2: perceive as negativity. And so I think that's where you

1355
01:07:47,200 --> 01:07:50,720
Speaker 2: find that like cycle, you know what I mean? And

1356
01:07:50,760 --> 01:07:52,760
Speaker 2: like I said, it's in this place that doesn't give

1357
01:07:52,760 --> 01:07:54,760
Speaker 2: a fuck about your brain. So it's in this place

1358
01:07:54,760 --> 01:07:57,200
Speaker 2: it's just like yeah, sure, it's gonna make you depressed,

1359
01:07:57,200 --> 01:07:59,640
Speaker 2: it's gonna make you angry, it's gonna make you, uh whatever,

1360
01:07:59,680 --> 01:08:03,040
Speaker 2: but you're not alone. Misery loves company, and you're gonna

1361
01:08:03,080 --> 01:08:05,400
Speaker 2: have plenty of company because we're making you all fucking miserable.

1362
01:08:06,800 --> 01:08:08,000
Speaker 3: Can I can I say this?

1363
01:08:08,960 --> 01:08:10,920
Speaker 4: I just have a new idea for I don't know

1364
01:08:10,920 --> 01:08:13,000
Speaker 4: if this is a podcast or just a question to

1365
01:08:13,040 --> 01:08:15,400
Speaker 4: ask people, but like, I'm really curious to be like,

1366
01:08:15,600 --> 01:08:19,640
Speaker 4: ask people, what are your top your top grudges that

1367
01:08:19,760 --> 01:08:23,479
Speaker 4: you've let go, your grudges that you were able to

1368
01:08:23,520 --> 01:08:25,280
Speaker 4: like think remember like when you were a kid and

1369
01:08:25,360 --> 01:08:27,519
Speaker 4: you hated a person, Now you don't hate that person,

1370
01:08:27,840 --> 01:08:30,320
Speaker 4: or like even as a younger adult, like it feels

1371
01:08:30,320 --> 01:08:32,799
Speaker 4: because as I get what you're saying, like it feels

1372
01:08:32,840 --> 01:08:34,800
Speaker 4: good to hold it, but.

1373
01:08:34,840 --> 01:08:36,320
Speaker 3: It feels even better to.

1374
01:08:36,439 --> 01:08:39,080
Speaker 2: I think so too. Oh and you know what else

1375
01:08:39,120 --> 01:08:40,880
Speaker 2: I was just thinking too, how much of it is

1376
01:08:40,880 --> 01:08:42,679
Speaker 2: probably from when we were kids and you weren't allowed

1377
01:08:42,720 --> 01:08:46,600
Speaker 2: to hold the grudge, you know, like it literally was

1378
01:08:46,640 --> 01:08:49,960
Speaker 2: taking like if you were angry with your parents, your parents,

1379
01:08:50,120 --> 01:08:52,800
Speaker 2: most parents. Obviously I don't know everyone's parents, but uh,

1380
01:08:53,200 --> 01:08:55,120
Speaker 2: I think for a lot of us, there was a

1381
01:08:55,160 --> 01:08:57,080
Speaker 2: time where it was like my way is a highway,

1382
01:08:57,479 --> 01:09:01,240
Speaker 2: I pay the bills. Here, you're a little person and

1383
01:09:01,280 --> 01:09:03,920
Speaker 2: you have feelings and stuff, but they don't supersede what

1384
01:09:03,960 --> 01:09:05,720
Speaker 2: I want you to do and what I tell you

1385
01:09:05,760 --> 01:09:10,200
Speaker 2: to feel, and so you like there's maybe there's like, oh,

1386
01:09:10,360 --> 01:09:12,720
Speaker 2: we feel like we're taking it back, almost like I

1387
01:09:12,800 --> 01:09:15,640
Speaker 2: wasn't allowed to be upset that my mom took my

1388
01:09:15,760 --> 01:09:18,960
Speaker 2: toy and I didn't feel like that was fair. I

1389
01:09:19,080 --> 01:09:22,040
Speaker 2: was told basically like you know, go to bed or

1390
01:09:22,240 --> 01:09:23,840
Speaker 2: too bad, I pay the bills.

1391
01:09:23,880 --> 01:09:24,080
Speaker 3: Here.

1392
01:09:24,400 --> 01:09:27,000
Speaker 2: I wasn't allowed input on what kind of cereal we

1393
01:09:27,080 --> 01:09:29,559
Speaker 2: get or whatever. And now we're adose and maybe we're

1394
01:09:29,600 --> 01:09:32,360
Speaker 2: just as adults still those kids, and we're like, no,

1395
01:09:32,560 --> 01:09:36,160
Speaker 2: fuck it, I hold the grudge. Now I'm the one

1396
01:09:36,520 --> 01:09:37,320
Speaker 2: who says.

1397
01:09:37,120 --> 01:09:40,040
Speaker 5: For me, Yeah, it's I feel like too.

1398
01:09:40,080 --> 01:09:42,920
Speaker 7: It's a false sense of control because you really don't

1399
01:09:42,960 --> 01:09:46,760
Speaker 7: have control. You're allowing these feelings to manipulate you, and

1400
01:09:46,800 --> 01:09:50,000
Speaker 7: the illusion is that I have control when truthfully, you're

1401
01:09:50,080 --> 01:09:53,240
Speaker 7: out of control because your actions to everybody else look

1402
01:09:53,360 --> 01:09:56,360
Speaker 7: out of control. That's why you see people post all

1403
01:09:56,439 --> 01:10:00,360
Speaker 7: crazy online and post all this stuff on Instagram and stuff,

1404
01:10:00,400 --> 01:10:03,000
Speaker 7: because they literally are out of control. They are screaming

1405
01:10:03,439 --> 01:10:07,759
Speaker 7: for help, they are screaming, I actually need to resolve

1406
01:10:07,800 --> 01:10:10,040
Speaker 7: this and I don't know how. And also when you

1407
01:10:10,080 --> 01:10:12,800
Speaker 7: talk about parents, to think about parents, and I think a.

1408
01:10:12,720 --> 01:10:14,720
Speaker 5: Lot of adults have difficulties.

1409
01:10:15,160 --> 01:10:19,320
Speaker 7: And I'm speaking from my own life. It took me

1410
01:10:19,520 --> 01:10:22,720
Speaker 7: being an adult and reflecting back on the decisions my

1411
01:10:22,840 --> 01:10:25,960
Speaker 7: mama made to finally realize she was a human being,

1412
01:10:26,240 --> 01:10:29,840
Speaker 7: because parents are presented to you as flawless. Parents are

1413
01:10:29,880 --> 01:10:32,559
Speaker 7: presented to you as these people. They take care of you,

1414
01:10:32,680 --> 01:10:37,000
Speaker 7: they feed you, they clothe you, and you know, but

1415
01:10:37,080 --> 01:10:39,320
Speaker 7: parents are all over the place. You have parents that

1416
01:10:39,400 --> 01:10:42,280
Speaker 7: are They do drugs, they do alcohol, They beat you,

1417
01:10:42,320 --> 01:10:45,160
Speaker 7: they abuse you, that could assault you, but they're still

1418
01:10:45,200 --> 01:10:48,200
Speaker 7: your parents. And so a lot of times people want

1419
01:10:50,880 --> 01:10:53,719
Speaker 7: don't want you to realize that your parents are human beings.

1420
01:10:54,040 --> 01:10:58,639
Speaker 7: So human beings are flawed. Human beings are are They

1421
01:10:58,680 --> 01:11:02,000
Speaker 7: make mistakes and they may error. And I think for me,

1422
01:11:02,320 --> 01:11:04,960
Speaker 7: it took me reflecting to go, Okay, this is why

1423
01:11:05,000 --> 01:11:07,120
Speaker 7: she did what she did. Now it makes sense because

1424
01:11:07,240 --> 01:11:09,559
Speaker 7: ever one period of time and Roger, Roger can contest

1425
01:11:09,560 --> 01:11:12,200
Speaker 7: to this, when I got grown and I moved out,

1426
01:11:12,240 --> 01:11:14,519
Speaker 7: like when me and him initially started living, to get

1427
01:11:14,640 --> 01:11:17,120
Speaker 7: right before we got married. For about two years, I

1428
01:11:17,120 --> 01:11:18,880
Speaker 7: didn't talk to anybody in my family. I just literally

1429
01:11:19,000 --> 01:11:20,880
Speaker 7: just cut them off. I didn't talk, I didn't combine

1430
01:11:20,920 --> 01:11:24,080
Speaker 7: because I was just mad and just raised and just

1431
01:11:24,160 --> 01:11:27,559
Speaker 7: full of unforgiveness. So you know that that that forgiveness thing,

1432
01:11:27,960 --> 01:11:31,439
Speaker 7: I guess touches my heart because once I let it go,

1433
01:11:32,000 --> 01:11:34,280
Speaker 7: my life was so much better and I begin to

1434
01:11:34,400 --> 01:11:35,759
Speaker 7: view things differently.

1435
01:11:36,280 --> 01:11:38,320
Speaker 5: When your heart is open, you can view life out.

1436
01:11:38,400 --> 01:11:40,759
Speaker 2: I like what you said about it feeling like control,

1437
01:11:41,400 --> 01:11:44,360
Speaker 2: because that is I think that's a big key, because

1438
01:11:44,439 --> 01:11:47,760
Speaker 2: I know there's been times where someone did something and

1439
01:11:47,800 --> 01:11:51,040
Speaker 2: they were like apologizing to me and they were a

1440
01:11:51,080 --> 01:11:53,800
Speaker 2: shock that I was so quick to be like, yes,

1441
01:11:54,040 --> 01:11:58,120
Speaker 2: it's it's cool. I understand if you're feeling anguish about this.

1442
01:11:58,280 --> 01:11:59,800
Speaker 2: I don't want you to have to feel english in

1443
01:11:59,880 --> 01:12:03,600
Speaker 2: it more. You know, I appreciate you apologizing for me,

1444
01:12:03,680 --> 01:12:06,759
Speaker 2: and that's it. And then it's almost like they're flinching,

1445
01:12:06,800 --> 01:12:08,600
Speaker 2: waiting for the day that I either like bring it

1446
01:12:08,680 --> 01:12:11,599
Speaker 2: back up or the day that I'm just like like, no, fuck,

1447
01:12:11,640 --> 01:12:12,360
Speaker 2: that that was fake.

1448
01:12:12,439 --> 01:12:14,960
Speaker 5: I like, because it's really.

1449
01:12:15,120 --> 01:12:17,880
Speaker 2: But it's also just I think we've been trained that

1450
01:12:18,920 --> 01:12:21,280
Speaker 2: in a weird way forgiveness is the wrong thing to do,

1451
01:12:21,560 --> 01:12:23,760
Speaker 2: you know what I mean. But it's so clear maybe

1452
01:12:23,760 --> 01:12:26,040
Speaker 2: because we grew up and it's like religion told there's

1453
01:12:26,080 --> 01:12:28,000
Speaker 2: a lot of pressure to forgive and ship and all

1454
01:12:28,000 --> 01:12:29,960
Speaker 2: the TV shows told you you should do it. So

1455
01:12:30,400 --> 01:12:32,559
Speaker 2: maybe we're rebelling. I don't know, but people do, yes,

1456
01:12:32,640 --> 01:12:34,479
Speaker 2: But there is like this weird thing where it's like

1457
01:12:34,520 --> 01:12:37,439
Speaker 2: the values have kind of flipped where it's like, but no,

1458
01:12:37,479 --> 01:12:40,799
Speaker 2: forgiveness is cool, Like it's.

1459
01:12:40,160 --> 01:12:42,040
Speaker 5: Not too bad, you know, it's not right.

1460
01:12:42,200 --> 01:12:44,120
Speaker 2: It made me feel good. I can't say it's made everyone,

1461
01:12:44,240 --> 01:12:46,880
Speaker 2: but it's definitely made me feel good. And I would

1462
01:12:46,920 --> 01:12:47,960
Speaker 2: like other people.

1463
01:12:47,680 --> 01:12:51,160
Speaker 7: To feel good, yes, because and I guess when I

1464
01:12:51,200 --> 01:12:54,240
Speaker 7: was talking about how it's an illusion of power, you know,

1465
01:12:54,360 --> 01:12:57,760
Speaker 7: when I was mad and angry and bitter and this unforgiveness,

1466
01:12:58,320 --> 01:13:00,679
Speaker 7: I thought that I was in control.

1467
01:13:00,760 --> 01:13:04,360
Speaker 5: I'm just and I thought that, you know, the if

1468
01:13:04,439 --> 01:13:06,559
Speaker 5: I heard that person's name, I would get angry.

1469
01:13:06,800 --> 01:13:09,920
Speaker 7: If if that person would come by, I would leave

1470
01:13:10,040 --> 01:13:12,120
Speaker 7: like like it was just this and not.

1471
01:13:12,000 --> 01:13:15,440
Speaker 2: Realize, well, you have great boundaries though, so like you

1472
01:13:15,439 --> 01:13:18,720
Speaker 2: you're really good at being like, Okay, this thing is

1473
01:13:18,760 --> 01:13:23,080
Speaker 2: a harmful situation and I'm stepping out of it. But

1474
01:13:23,200 --> 01:13:25,760
Speaker 2: you are also a forgiven person. So it's like that

1475
01:13:26,040 --> 01:13:30,880
Speaker 2: thing where where I think if someone doesn't know you,

1476
01:13:31,160 --> 01:13:33,639
Speaker 2: they would just be like, oh, you're you're angry about

1477
01:13:33,640 --> 01:13:36,760
Speaker 2: this thing or whatever. But I think, well, like like

1478
01:13:36,800 --> 01:13:39,840
Speaker 2: when after twenty sixteen, after the election, and there was

1479
01:13:39,840 --> 01:13:41,479
Speaker 2: this long period of time where you were just mad

1480
01:13:41,479 --> 01:13:42,559
Speaker 2: at like white women.

1481
01:13:44,800 --> 01:13:45,360
Speaker 4: I was not.

1482
01:13:46,000 --> 01:13:49,400
Speaker 2: And you know, our audience, some of our guests, people

1483
01:13:49,439 --> 01:13:51,840
Speaker 2: that became our friends, they were very heavy. I like, yeah,

1484
01:13:51,880 --> 01:13:53,640
Speaker 2: fuck these white women and shit. And I was, you know,

1485
01:13:53,880 --> 01:13:56,360
Speaker 2: I was hurt right, And it was like I forget

1486
01:13:56,400 --> 01:13:57,800
Speaker 2: how long it went, but it went for a while

1487
01:13:57,800 --> 01:13:59,000
Speaker 2: before I was like, like.

1488
01:13:58,960 --> 01:14:00,400
Speaker 5: Roger had to pull me to aside.

1489
01:14:00,840 --> 01:14:03,559
Speaker 2: Are you I'm like, these people don't know you, and

1490
01:14:03,600 --> 01:14:06,559
Speaker 2: I do, so they might just think you being upset

1491
01:14:06,600 --> 01:14:09,400
Speaker 2: and going off on the show every day as entertaining. Yes,

1492
01:14:09,720 --> 01:14:12,559
Speaker 2: but as my wife and a human being that has

1493
01:14:12,640 --> 01:14:17,040
Speaker 2: to like, you know, live outside this this what we

1494
01:14:17,160 --> 01:14:20,439
Speaker 2: do for a show, Like are you okay?

1495
01:14:20,680 --> 01:14:21,320
Speaker 3: You know what I mean?

1496
01:14:21,400 --> 01:14:25,160
Speaker 7: Because and I had to evaluate like why was I

1497
01:14:25,200 --> 01:14:28,800
Speaker 7: feeling this way? Where was the emotions coming from? Like

1498
01:14:28,800 --> 01:14:31,360
Speaker 7: like I had to get to the root of the anger.

1499
01:14:31,960 --> 01:14:35,200
Speaker 7: And once I realized the anger was just being hurt

1500
01:14:35,280 --> 01:14:38,600
Speaker 7: and disappointed and let down by this country like like,

1501
01:14:38,640 --> 01:14:39,639
Speaker 7: and that's something that I.

1502
01:14:39,600 --> 01:14:41,840
Speaker 5: Could not control. I could not control that.

1503
01:14:42,080 --> 01:14:44,479
Speaker 7: And so because I could not control it, it lit

1504
01:14:44,520 --> 01:14:46,880
Speaker 7: a fire in me that I couldn't put out. And

1505
01:14:46,920 --> 01:14:49,320
Speaker 7: so every time you talk to me, I would just

1506
01:14:49,400 --> 01:14:51,760
Speaker 7: pit that fire at you because the fire had been

1507
01:14:51,840 --> 01:14:54,080
Speaker 7: brewing in me for a very long time, and I

1508
01:14:54,080 --> 01:14:56,200
Speaker 7: didn't know what to do with this fire. And so

1509
01:14:56,400 --> 01:15:00,040
Speaker 7: I think for me, I had to find ways of

1510
01:15:00,040 --> 01:15:03,720
Speaker 7: of releasing that so that that anger would eventure to

1511
01:15:03,760 --> 01:15:04,080
Speaker 7: go away.

1512
01:15:04,120 --> 01:15:05,840
Speaker 5: For me, I started running.

1513
01:15:06,280 --> 01:15:09,040
Speaker 7: And I know this might sound wow, but when I

1514
01:15:09,080 --> 01:15:12,360
Speaker 7: started running, every time I put my foot to the ground,

1515
01:15:12,439 --> 01:15:14,400
Speaker 7: I felt like I was beating the anger out of me.

1516
01:15:15,160 --> 01:15:18,000
Speaker 5: Every time I would would just pump my arms and

1517
01:15:18,040 --> 01:15:18,760
Speaker 5: breathe real hard.

1518
01:15:18,800 --> 01:15:21,800
Speaker 7: I felt like it was almost like a release, release, release, release,

1519
01:15:21,880 --> 01:15:24,200
Speaker 7: And it just cost me to run faster and move faster,

1520
01:15:24,240 --> 01:15:26,160
Speaker 7: and run faster and move faster, and.

1521
01:15:26,080 --> 01:15:28,360
Speaker 5: The benefit was me losing weight and all that stuff.

1522
01:15:28,720 --> 01:15:32,479
Speaker 7: But it also allowed me to take this pitch up

1523
01:15:32,680 --> 01:15:36,760
Speaker 7: energy and get it out release. And because I went

1524
01:15:36,840 --> 01:15:39,920
Speaker 7: through that I understand why people do the things they

1525
01:15:39,920 --> 01:15:43,320
Speaker 7: do online. Like it took me experiencing that to understand

1526
01:15:43,560 --> 01:15:46,799
Speaker 7: why people post anger all day, why people post bitterness

1527
01:15:46,800 --> 01:15:49,320
Speaker 7: all day, why people post sadness all day, because it's

1528
01:15:49,320 --> 01:15:51,400
Speaker 7: something in them that they need to release and let go.

1529
01:15:51,560 --> 01:15:53,800
Speaker 5: They don't even know what the root called the problem is.

1530
01:15:53,840 --> 01:15:55,840
Speaker 2: You have to dig just a little bit deeper. At

1531
01:15:55,920 --> 01:15:58,519
Speaker 2: least that's how I like. I remember when I saw

1532
01:15:58,560 --> 01:16:02,640
Speaker 2: the video of the guy youer being hugged by the

1533
01:16:02,680 --> 01:16:05,840
Speaker 2: brother of both of them, John, and then the to

1534
01:16:05,920 --> 01:16:08,080
Speaker 2: me worse, the judge coming down of hugging, which I

1535
01:16:08,120 --> 01:16:11,040
Speaker 2: thought was kind of weird, and like, unless you're the

1536
01:16:11,080 --> 01:16:14,040
Speaker 2: hugging judge, If you are the hugging judge, I take

1537
01:16:14,080 --> 01:16:16,120
Speaker 2: it back, you know, like, if you hug everyone, then

1538
01:16:16,240 --> 01:16:18,200
Speaker 2: fuck it that then yes your thing? Do your think?

1539
01:16:18,240 --> 01:16:21,920
Speaker 2: Actually like that? But if you only hug the police

1540
01:16:21,960 --> 01:16:25,880
Speaker 2: officers who go to jail, then I don't like that one. Now,

1541
01:16:25,880 --> 01:16:28,759
Speaker 2: I wonder. But I remember at first I was mad,

1542
01:16:29,680 --> 01:16:31,120
Speaker 2: and then I thought about it and I was like,

1543
01:16:31,160 --> 01:16:35,080
Speaker 2: oh no, I'm not mad. I'm actually jealous. I'm jealous

1544
01:16:35,120 --> 01:16:38,519
Speaker 2: that everyone doesn't get this that I know if I

1545
01:16:38,640 --> 01:16:41,719
Speaker 2: do a crime. I'm not getting this version of justice,

1546
01:16:41,760 --> 01:16:44,040
Speaker 2: this one where they hugging and go, I'm sorry, you

1547
01:16:44,040 --> 01:16:46,000
Speaker 2: have to go to jail. And I'm gonna give you

1548
01:16:46,040 --> 01:16:48,680
Speaker 2: my Bible because it means so much to me. And

1549
01:16:48,760 --> 01:16:50,799
Speaker 2: I know you did a thing that was a mistake

1550
01:16:51,080 --> 01:16:53,519
Speaker 2: and you're not a bad person, but you just made.

1551
01:16:53,320 --> 01:16:55,760
Speaker 6: A mistake and hopefully you'll be ready.

1552
01:16:56,760 --> 01:16:56,960
Speaker 3: Yeah.

1553
01:16:57,000 --> 01:16:59,160
Speaker 2: And so once I realized it was jealousy, I could

1554
01:16:59,240 --> 01:17:01,480
Speaker 2: drop that. I was like, I'm not even angry. I'm

1555
01:17:01,560 --> 01:17:06,680
Speaker 2: more I'm more envious that this is happening, which you know,

1556
01:17:06,800 --> 01:17:10,439
Speaker 2: is a more honest evaluation that situation than just being angry,

1557
01:17:10,479 --> 01:17:13,200
Speaker 2: which I think most people stopping anger, they just I'm angry.

1558
01:17:13,520 --> 01:17:15,840
Speaker 2: I will express this rage to everyone. We will all

1559
01:17:15,840 --> 01:17:19,439
Speaker 2: commiserate over our rage. And it's almost like, if you

1560
01:17:19,479 --> 01:17:23,000
Speaker 2: admit that it's envy or jealousy, you show weakness because

1561
01:17:23,040 --> 01:17:25,439
Speaker 2: that comes from INSIDEU, you know what I mean, As

1562
01:17:25,439 --> 01:17:28,799
Speaker 2: opposed to like, this external thing is making me angry.

1563
01:17:29,360 --> 01:17:32,360
Speaker 2: We we that's more of an acceptable emotion, as opposed

1564
01:17:32,400 --> 01:17:35,880
Speaker 2: to like, no, this thing kind of kind of makes

1565
01:17:35,920 --> 01:17:39,479
Speaker 2: me sad that I can't have that thing which is

1566
01:17:39,520 --> 01:17:40,120
Speaker 2: now about me.

1567
01:17:40,560 --> 01:17:45,280
Speaker 7: Yeah, And one more thing before before I let you speak,

1568
01:17:45,439 --> 01:17:46,120
Speaker 7: because I.

1569
01:17:46,080 --> 01:17:46,599
Speaker 2: See your mind.

1570
01:17:48,640 --> 01:17:53,200
Speaker 7: I also think for me, this is why something small

1571
01:17:53,320 --> 01:17:57,240
Speaker 7: happens and everybody responses is a ten, because this is

1572
01:17:57,240 --> 01:17:59,519
Speaker 7: why a lot of times for me, I'm like, oh

1573
01:17:59,680 --> 01:18:02,800
Speaker 7: what you y'all are angry about something else, This small

1574
01:18:02,920 --> 01:18:06,720
Speaker 7: infraction did not elicit this response.

1575
01:18:06,960 --> 01:18:10,320
Speaker 2: Yeah, like the celebrities Instagram post and like that's not

1576
01:18:10,720 --> 01:18:13,640
Speaker 2: that important. Yeah, yeah, y'all don't want to tell you

1577
01:18:13,960 --> 01:18:15,360
Speaker 2: what has to be important in your life.

1578
01:18:15,360 --> 01:18:18,479
Speaker 6: But yeah, because that one seems like a thing that

1579
01:18:18,920 --> 01:18:20,000
Speaker 6: is like you're.

1580
01:18:19,840 --> 01:18:23,439
Speaker 2: Being so upset about and it's we literally will forget

1581
01:18:23,479 --> 01:18:24,240
Speaker 2: about this tomorrow.

1582
01:18:24,600 --> 01:18:25,720
Speaker 5: It won't last that long.

1583
01:18:25,840 --> 01:18:30,360
Speaker 7: And and so when I started realizing that, I was saying, oh, excuse.

1584
01:18:29,960 --> 01:18:32,679
Speaker 5: Me, everybody is upset about all these things.

1585
01:18:32,720 --> 01:18:36,320
Speaker 7: And I've also realized too, with the coronavirus, a lot

1586
01:18:36,320 --> 01:18:38,880
Speaker 7: of people never realized how upset there was until they

1587
01:18:38,880 --> 01:18:42,719
Speaker 7: stopped moving. It's something about your everyday life. Because everybody

1588
01:18:42,760 --> 01:18:44,680
Speaker 7: has a routine. They get up, they go to work day,

1589
01:18:44,880 --> 01:18:46,920
Speaker 7: you know, they have sex, they take care of their kids,

1590
01:18:47,080 --> 01:18:49,760
Speaker 7: you know, so you always have something to distract you

1591
01:18:49,840 --> 01:18:53,720
Speaker 7: from this lingering anger that that kind of lays on

1592
01:18:54,120 --> 01:18:56,080
Speaker 7: your chest and wraps it stulf around you.

1593
01:18:56,120 --> 01:18:56,920
Speaker 5: It's always there.

1594
01:18:57,200 --> 01:18:58,680
Speaker 7: But because you can say, oh, I can do this,

1595
01:18:58,800 --> 01:19:00,240
Speaker 7: or I can do this, or I can cook, or

1596
01:19:00,280 --> 01:19:01,720
Speaker 7: I can clean, or I can go out, or I

1597
01:19:01,720 --> 01:19:03,200
Speaker 7: can go up with my friends, or I can drink

1598
01:19:03,280 --> 01:19:04,800
Speaker 7: or I could do drugs. If you could always do

1599
01:19:04,880 --> 01:19:06,880
Speaker 7: something else to distract you from that. But when the

1600
01:19:06,920 --> 01:19:09,680
Speaker 7: world stopped, they was like.

1601
01:19:09,640 --> 01:19:11,719
Speaker 5: Oh my gosh, I'm here with my thoughts. Oh my gosh,

1602
01:19:11,760 --> 01:19:13,360
Speaker 5: this is why people getting exiety and they're.

1603
01:19:13,160 --> 01:19:15,160
Speaker 7: Going to get at the house because for the first

1604
01:19:15,160 --> 01:19:17,200
Speaker 7: time ever they had to look this thing in the

1605
01:19:17,240 --> 01:19:19,400
Speaker 7: face and be this is who this is who I

1606
01:19:19,439 --> 01:19:19,840
Speaker 7: really am.

1607
01:19:19,960 --> 01:19:21,559
Speaker 2: That's what I think is happening with the people that

1608
01:19:21,600 --> 01:19:24,800
Speaker 2: aren't wearing masks and shit like I don't like. I know,

1609
01:19:25,120 --> 01:19:27,640
Speaker 2: it's easier to just be like you stupid motherfuckers, but

1610
01:19:27,680 --> 01:19:30,559
Speaker 2: I mean, just some That was the thing that made

1611
01:19:30,560 --> 01:19:33,320
Speaker 2: me stop being so judgmental, is because I think we

1612
01:19:33,400 --> 01:19:37,840
Speaker 2: need people right and it's not smart Like I like

1613
01:19:38,040 --> 01:19:40,880
Speaker 2: that Mike Kaplan is being I like that Mike is

1614
01:19:40,920 --> 01:19:44,120
Speaker 2: being safe because I think Mike's very smart and I'm

1615
01:19:44,160 --> 01:19:48,000
Speaker 2: being and I'm being very cautious, you know, because I

1616
01:19:48,080 --> 01:19:50,280
Speaker 2: like the people who I'm like, this person's a very

1617
01:19:50,320 --> 01:19:53,760
Speaker 2: smart person and just bar none, they're like scientifically, I'm

1618
01:19:53,760 --> 01:19:56,719
Speaker 2: just taking as least risk as possible for people around

1619
01:19:56,760 --> 01:20:00,240
Speaker 2: me and for myself and all that stuff, right, And

1620
01:20:00,280 --> 01:20:03,240
Speaker 2: so that does make me like happy, and I think

1621
01:20:03,240 --> 01:20:06,240
Speaker 2: that is the right thing to do, Yes, But I

1622
01:20:06,360 --> 01:20:09,280
Speaker 2: used to be like mad when I would see people. Yes,

1623
01:20:09,320 --> 01:20:11,439
Speaker 2: I was taking risks that I wouldn't have taken when

1624
01:20:11,439 --> 01:20:13,560
Speaker 2: I'm just like, what, you went to a restaurant and

1625
01:20:14,040 --> 01:20:16,160
Speaker 2: there's all these people in here and you're taking pictures

1626
01:20:16,160 --> 01:20:18,400
Speaker 2: next to each other, there's no mask, and I would

1627
01:20:18,400 --> 01:20:21,519
Speaker 2: feel upset. But then I realized, like, there's something in

1628
01:20:21,560 --> 01:20:26,000
Speaker 2: people where they need. Some people would risk yet they

1629
01:20:26,000 --> 01:20:29,120
Speaker 2: were literally risk being sick to be around other people

1630
01:20:29,400 --> 01:20:30,720
Speaker 2: because they need that shit too.

1631
01:20:31,160 --> 01:20:35,040
Speaker 5: Yeah, and that's the reality that I had to accept.

1632
01:20:35,040 --> 01:20:38,280
Speaker 7: And I'm to the point I'm like, people are going

1633
01:20:38,320 --> 01:20:40,640
Speaker 7: to people, and people.

1634
01:20:40,600 --> 01:20:41,439
Speaker 5: Enjoy other people.

1635
01:20:41,640 --> 01:20:45,000
Speaker 7: It's just natural to enjoy, you know, being around people.

1636
01:20:45,280 --> 01:20:48,639
Speaker 7: And that was taking away from people, particularly extroverts. People

1637
01:20:48,720 --> 01:20:51,200
Speaker 7: that are like introverts, they.

1638
01:20:51,200 --> 01:20:52,679
Speaker 5: Were to be at home anyway.

1639
01:20:52,960 --> 01:20:55,400
Speaker 7: They still people though, but they was like, at least

1640
01:20:55,400 --> 01:20:58,479
Speaker 7: I could control the people people like me that are

1641
01:20:58,520 --> 01:20:59,320
Speaker 7: like I got to go.

1642
01:20:59,439 --> 01:21:01,680
Speaker 5: I'm always out side, I'm always doing things.

1643
01:21:01,439 --> 01:21:04,280
Speaker 7: And now you're telling people like me to situation down.

1644
01:21:04,680 --> 01:21:07,200
Speaker 2: Well's the thing as an introvert, It's not that I

1645
01:21:07,240 --> 01:21:11,040
Speaker 2: don't want to be around people in general. The people

1646
01:21:11,080 --> 01:21:14,120
Speaker 2: I want to be around I want to be around intently, intensely,

1647
01:21:14,320 --> 01:21:18,679
Speaker 2: like that is intentional. I value those people, those relationships

1648
01:21:18,720 --> 01:21:21,400
Speaker 2: a lot. Like Justin comes here. Used to come here

1649
01:21:21,439 --> 01:21:23,280
Speaker 2: every week, and now we have to do the show

1650
01:21:23,360 --> 01:21:25,559
Speaker 2: remote every week. You see what I'm saying, So like

1651
01:21:26,280 --> 01:21:28,960
Speaker 2: it still takes a toll on everybody. We all need connection,

1652
01:21:29,120 --> 01:21:32,000
Speaker 2: but we have to I think for a while I

1653
01:21:32,160 --> 01:21:35,960
Speaker 2: was not as understanding of people taking risks for connection,

1654
01:21:36,160 --> 01:21:39,559
Speaker 2: you know what I mean? And I have to be like, Okay,

1655
01:21:39,760 --> 01:21:41,439
Speaker 2: you know I wouldn't do that. I think that's a

1656
01:21:41,439 --> 01:21:45,599
Speaker 2: little risky, a little dangerous, but you know, you're human,

1657
01:21:45,800 --> 01:21:46,400
Speaker 2: Like what the fuck?

1658
01:21:47,160 --> 01:21:47,360
Speaker 3: You know?

1659
01:21:47,560 --> 01:21:50,520
Speaker 2: Maybe this will make people think about prisons and solitary

1660
01:21:50,560 --> 01:21:55,920
Speaker 2: confinements and house arrested, and it.

1661
01:21:55,920 --> 01:21:58,040
Speaker 7: Just makes people consider, you know what, I might need

1662
01:21:58,080 --> 01:22:01,160
Speaker 7: to vote because you know, if I would have maybe

1663
01:22:01,240 --> 01:22:03,000
Speaker 7: we would have had a competent president.

1664
01:22:03,080 --> 01:22:04,960
Speaker 5: Well, we wouldn't have been in this situation here.

1665
01:22:05,080 --> 01:22:07,120
Speaker 2: You know what, I would vote for him, but he

1666
01:22:07,160 --> 01:22:09,240
Speaker 2: didn't want to know bother his prison. So there you go.

1667
01:22:09,920 --> 01:22:11,120
Speaker 2: I'm all the ways to the list.

1668
01:22:11,800 --> 01:22:14,479
Speaker 3: Uh can I can? I?

1669
01:22:16,040 --> 01:22:20,000
Speaker 4: I have seventeen things to say. First, that was I mean,

1670
01:22:20,400 --> 01:22:23,280
Speaker 4: amen to everything that you're saying. I like the idea

1671
01:22:23,320 --> 01:22:26,639
Speaker 4: that the people who who can't stop moving around, they're

1672
01:22:26,640 --> 01:22:27,839
Speaker 4: like emotional sharks.

1673
01:22:27,960 --> 01:22:30,080
Speaker 3: You know. It's just like, you.

1674
01:22:30,000 --> 01:22:32,120
Speaker 4: Know, we got we gotta keep moving otherwise we have

1675
01:22:32,240 --> 01:22:34,280
Speaker 4: to sit with ourselves.

1676
01:22:34,360 --> 01:22:37,439
Speaker 3: No da emotional jobs, you know.

1677
01:22:39,160 --> 01:22:41,880
Speaker 4: And I like when you said I don't know if

1678
01:22:41,880 --> 01:22:43,680
Speaker 4: you said it exactly like this, but it's like the

1679
01:22:44,120 --> 01:22:46,080
Speaker 4: reaction should match the infraction.

1680
01:22:46,320 --> 01:22:47,439
Speaker 3: That's what I would say.

1681
01:22:47,760 --> 01:22:52,240
Speaker 4: Reaction should match the infraction. Uh, the idea, here's a here's.

1682
01:22:52,040 --> 01:22:54,519
Speaker 3: A fun thing. Like people you see pictures of people

1683
01:22:54,560 --> 01:22:55,599
Speaker 3: online being less.

1684
01:22:55,439 --> 01:22:59,400
Speaker 4: Safe than you are or you would be, and like

1685
01:22:59,560 --> 01:23:02,400
Speaker 4: here's what Here's what Jesus would say is forgive them

1686
01:23:02,680 --> 01:23:05,160
Speaker 4: for they know not what they do. And what I

1687
01:23:05,200 --> 01:23:07,639
Speaker 4: would say, or Jesus today would say, yell at them

1688
01:23:07,640 --> 01:23:12,800
Speaker 4: online for they know not what they do. I like

1689
01:23:12,880 --> 01:23:16,360
Speaker 4: that earlier, like just so many wonderful turns of phrase,

1690
01:23:16,400 --> 01:23:19,519
Speaker 4: like you said you were full of unforgiveness, which is

1691
01:23:19,680 --> 01:23:22,840
Speaker 4: also like a beautiful way, like is it that forgiveness

1692
01:23:22,880 --> 01:23:25,840
Speaker 4: is a thing and is unforgiveness just the lack of it?

1693
01:23:25,960 --> 01:23:27,680
Speaker 3: Or is an actual presence?

1694
01:23:27,760 --> 01:23:31,240
Speaker 4: Because like love, there's a thing that I've learned about

1695
01:23:31,280 --> 01:23:34,160
Speaker 4: from like a course of miracles. They do that love

1696
01:23:34,600 --> 01:23:36,080
Speaker 4: and fear are kind of opposites.

1697
01:23:36,280 --> 01:23:36,960
Speaker 3: The way that light and.

1698
01:23:37,000 --> 01:23:39,360
Speaker 4: Dark art like there is no real there's no dark

1699
01:23:39,439 --> 01:23:42,880
Speaker 4: is immeasurable. Dark is simply the absence of light. Light,

1700
01:23:42,920 --> 01:23:46,439
Speaker 4: which is measurable energy. How do you get rid of darkness?

1701
01:23:46,560 --> 01:23:48,680
Speaker 4: Not with more darkness, not with a baseball bat, not

1702
01:23:48,760 --> 01:23:50,920
Speaker 4: with fire. With light, well, fire would work because of

1703
01:23:50,920 --> 01:23:55,080
Speaker 4: the light light. Fight fight light, fight darkness with light,

1704
01:23:55,240 --> 01:23:58,519
Speaker 4: with peace and love. The absence of love is fear,

1705
01:23:58,960 --> 01:24:01,240
Speaker 4: and so the way to fight fear is not with

1706
01:24:01,280 --> 01:24:05,240
Speaker 4: more fear, but with love, with compassion, with understanding, and

1707
01:24:06,120 --> 01:24:06,920
Speaker 4: with respect to.

1708
01:24:08,400 --> 01:24:08,800
Speaker 3: What is it?

1709
01:24:08,880 --> 01:24:11,960
Speaker 4: Restorative justice, I believe is what it's called. I saw

1710
01:24:12,000 --> 01:24:13,880
Speaker 4: about it on I don't know if you guys watched

1711
01:24:13,880 --> 01:24:16,280
Speaker 4: Wyatt Snak's show on HBO.

1712
01:24:16,400 --> 01:24:17,960
Speaker 3: Problem areas with why Snak.

1713
01:24:18,560 --> 01:24:21,439
Speaker 4: The first season was all about like the challenge, the

1714
01:24:21,520 --> 01:24:26,519
Speaker 4: troubles with policing, and in one of the episodes they

1715
01:24:27,080 --> 01:24:29,240
Speaker 4: there was a I believe, if I hope I'm getting

1716
01:24:29,240 --> 01:24:33,559
Speaker 4: the name right, a restorative justice conversation in which a

1717
01:24:33,640 --> 01:24:38,400
Speaker 4: man had killed his girlfriend. I think maybe while drunk,

1718
01:24:38,920 --> 01:24:40,720
Speaker 4: you know, they got into a fight, whatever it was,

1719
01:24:41,280 --> 01:24:44,080
Speaker 4: and he is now in jail for I think what

1720
01:24:44,160 --> 01:24:47,200
Speaker 4: would be forty years. But there's a program in the

1721
01:24:47,200 --> 01:24:50,640
Speaker 4: state that he lives in where if the family of

1722
01:24:50,680 --> 01:24:53,280
Speaker 4: the victim agree to it, which they did, to have

1723
01:24:53,720 --> 01:24:57,599
Speaker 4: like a series of conversations to communicate with each other

1724
01:24:57,600 --> 01:25:00,080
Speaker 4: and commune with each other, if they both choose to

1725
01:25:00,640 --> 01:25:03,720
Speaker 4: like to like he he wished he hadn't done it.

1726
01:25:03,840 --> 01:25:06,439
Speaker 4: He was sorry, He did as much as he could.

1727
01:25:06,840 --> 01:25:10,120
Speaker 4: He apologized, you know, for what it was worth like

1728
01:25:10,320 --> 01:25:14,400
Speaker 4: and the people whose daughter had died, like they as

1729
01:25:14,479 --> 01:25:17,559
Speaker 4: much as they could did like and for themselves, like

1730
01:25:17,640 --> 01:25:19,880
Speaker 4: sat with him and listened to him and talk with

1731
01:25:19,960 --> 01:25:23,200
Speaker 4: him and forgave him as much as they could. And

1732
01:25:23,680 --> 01:25:25,240
Speaker 4: they made it so that I think it made his

1733
01:25:25,280 --> 01:25:28,080
Speaker 4: sentence be twenty years instead of forty years, because it

1734
01:25:28,080 --> 01:25:31,559
Speaker 4: seems like like he's not likely to like based on

1735
01:25:31,680 --> 01:25:35,639
Speaker 4: what they experienced, he's not likely to make this mistake

1736
01:25:35,960 --> 01:25:41,160
Speaker 4: again based on their understanding of his of his understanding

1737
01:25:41,320 --> 01:25:44,400
Speaker 4: of that he had done that, you know, And it's

1738
01:25:44,439 --> 01:25:46,599
Speaker 4: it's not about like, you know, just flipping a switch

1739
01:25:46,640 --> 01:25:50,640
Speaker 4: and being like, I I'm sorry, I forgive me, but

1740
01:25:51,000 --> 01:25:54,280
Speaker 4: for real when in you know, in this situation, like

1741
01:25:54,320 --> 01:25:56,720
Speaker 4: alcohol doesn't absolve you of the things that you do.

1742
01:25:56,960 --> 01:26:00,320
Speaker 4: But he was able to have that experience. And this

1743
01:26:00,520 --> 01:26:03,280
Speaker 4: I wanted to say when you were talking about specifically

1744
01:26:03,680 --> 01:26:06,880
Speaker 4: what it's like to be black in America, which you

1745
01:26:07,000 --> 01:26:10,240
Speaker 4: know and I do not know from the inside, but

1746
01:26:10,600 --> 01:26:14,440
Speaker 4: I've listened to a lot of comedians talk about their experience.

1747
01:26:14,479 --> 01:26:16,320
Speaker 3: I've read I read it's weird.

1748
01:26:16,360 --> 01:26:18,680
Speaker 4: I read it first in an interview with Sam Jay,

1749
01:26:19,200 --> 01:26:23,200
Speaker 4: and then I saw several other black.

1750
01:26:22,960 --> 01:26:24,639
Speaker 3: Comedians making this point.

1751
01:26:24,680 --> 01:26:26,599
Speaker 4: But Sam Jay's the version I saw make it first,

1752
01:26:26,960 --> 01:26:33,360
Speaker 4: that that black people in America are living with their abuser.

1753
01:26:33,880 --> 01:26:36,799
Speaker 3: They're they're living with you are.

1754
01:26:36,880 --> 01:26:41,360
Speaker 4: In this in this in systemic racism, Like you can't

1755
01:26:41,360 --> 01:26:43,160
Speaker 4: do the thing. I mean, you could leave the country,

1756
01:26:43,320 --> 01:26:46,959
Speaker 4: but I mean hardly anymore. But right now, the metaphor

1757
01:26:47,080 --> 01:26:50,840
Speaker 4: is that there's a person being abused like you can,

1758
01:26:51,120 --> 01:26:53,760
Speaker 4: so when I was like, you can forgive the abuser

1759
01:26:54,080 --> 01:26:56,960
Speaker 4: from far away, but an important component of it is

1760
01:26:57,040 --> 01:27:00,879
Speaker 4: to remove yourself from the situation. And if you're unable

1761
01:27:00,960 --> 01:27:07,160
Speaker 4: to remove yourself from the white supremacist, patriarchal structures of

1762
01:27:07,479 --> 01:27:11,960
Speaker 4: the country, then you you There is no simple, easy

1763
01:27:12,120 --> 01:27:15,840
Speaker 4: answer to being like, well, I forgive you for what

1764
01:27:16,000 --> 01:27:19,120
Speaker 4: has already happened, and tomorrow I'll forgive you for today.

1765
01:27:19,120 --> 01:27:20,960
Speaker 3: I guess, right, yeah.

1766
01:27:20,760 --> 01:27:23,960
Speaker 2: I think that's that. Yeah, And I think and it

1767
01:27:24,080 --> 01:27:26,240
Speaker 2: became kind of a revolutionary act to be able to

1768
01:27:26,280 --> 01:27:30,840
Speaker 2: say I'm not gonna forgive you, know, because right we

1769
01:27:30,840 --> 01:27:33,960
Speaker 2: weren't allowed. And I think, honestly, like, because I think

1770
01:27:33,960 --> 01:27:37,679
Speaker 2: about shit like this a lot, and sometimes I bring

1771
01:27:37,720 --> 01:27:41,200
Speaker 2: it here to the show to express it. Sometimes I'll

1772
01:27:41,439 --> 01:27:43,920
Speaker 2: maybe tweet or write about it, but normally I just

1773
01:27:44,000 --> 01:27:45,400
Speaker 2: kind of keep some of these ideas in my head

1774
01:27:45,439 --> 01:27:47,400
Speaker 2: because I haven't fully fleshed them out, or I just

1775
01:27:47,439 --> 01:27:53,160
Speaker 2: know they're possibly unpopular. But I really do think to

1776
01:27:53,240 --> 01:28:00,640
Speaker 2: some extent, because we've been indoctrinated by white supremacist patriarchal

1777
01:28:00,720 --> 01:28:06,520
Speaker 2: capitalism and stuff, we think freedom is either co opting.

1778
01:28:06,240 --> 01:28:08,760
Speaker 6: Those tools and then using them.

1779
01:28:08,439 --> 01:28:12,160
Speaker 2: For ourselves like oh we finally Like now I'm at

1780
01:28:12,160 --> 01:28:15,080
Speaker 2: the top, and I'm like, I'm gonna do to you

1781
01:28:15,280 --> 01:28:17,400
Speaker 2: what you've done to me, which is like, you know,

1782
01:28:18,479 --> 01:28:22,439
Speaker 2: I ironically the biggest fear of people who oppress people

1783
01:28:22,560 --> 01:28:24,400
Speaker 2: is one day will be on the other side of

1784
01:28:24,400 --> 01:28:26,840
Speaker 2: the suppression, you know. So I like every Hollywood movie

1785
01:28:26,840 --> 01:28:28,920
Speaker 2: that has aliens, has the aliens come here and basically

1786
01:28:28,960 --> 01:28:32,120
Speaker 2: be what white people are to the planet, like like

1787
01:28:32,479 --> 01:28:34,880
Speaker 2: every like aliens never just come and chills and I

1788
01:28:34,880 --> 01:28:36,880
Speaker 2: would just show up and be like, We're gonna take

1789
01:28:36,920 --> 01:28:40,120
Speaker 2: all this hmmm water, Let's let's make it ours. So

1790
01:28:41,040 --> 01:28:43,639
Speaker 2: I think that's a big thing for people, is like free.

1791
01:28:44,240 --> 01:28:47,639
Speaker 2: We think freedom would be that, but I think freedom

1792
01:28:47,680 --> 01:28:51,920
Speaker 2: would be the ability to choose kind of you know

1793
01:28:51,960 --> 01:28:55,640
Speaker 2: what I'm saying, like like who are you? As they

1794
01:28:55,680 --> 01:28:58,240
Speaker 2: said on Lovecraft Country, who are you? Uninterrupted?

1795
01:28:59,000 --> 01:29:00,719
Speaker 5: Like would you be?

1796
01:29:00,920 --> 01:29:04,280
Speaker 2: Who would you be if this ship had not happened

1797
01:29:04,280 --> 01:29:06,799
Speaker 2: to you or if you weren't if it wasn't your motive,

1798
01:29:07,000 --> 01:29:08,920
Speaker 2: like to you have to deal with this thing and

1799
01:29:09,040 --> 01:29:14,440
Speaker 2: neither resolve it, get revenge for it, you know, penalize

1800
01:29:14,439 --> 01:29:16,080
Speaker 2: someone for it. Like who would you be if you

1801
01:29:16,240 --> 01:29:20,559
Speaker 2: just were ride the individual as opposed to Rid, the

1802
01:29:20,600 --> 01:29:24,719
Speaker 2: black guy who has to like overcome racism and fix,

1803
01:29:25,000 --> 01:29:26,920
Speaker 2: you know, and get this.

1804
01:29:26,960 --> 01:29:28,840
Speaker 6: Restitution for whatever's happened to you.

1805
01:29:28,920 --> 01:29:32,040
Speaker 2: I think that's where I see it going, you know,

1806
01:29:32,520 --> 01:29:34,200
Speaker 2: And I think that's one of the reasons that like,

1807
01:29:35,439 --> 01:29:38,719
Speaker 2: sometimes I feel like a lot of the prison abolition

1808
01:29:38,760 --> 01:29:41,519
Speaker 2: and stuff we see online it's kind of hypocritical because

1809
01:29:41,720 --> 01:29:45,519
Speaker 2: very punitive based on dislike or like of the person,

1810
01:29:46,479 --> 01:29:48,920
Speaker 2: which is kind of gonna It's kind of like we

1811
01:29:48,960 --> 01:29:51,960
Speaker 2: would all have to collect not all, but the majority

1812
01:29:51,960 --> 01:29:55,360
Speaker 2: of society would have to collectively let that go, like

1813
01:29:55,400 --> 01:30:00,599
Speaker 2: the puritanical instinct of punishing. We would have to leave

1814
01:30:00,680 --> 01:30:04,799
Speaker 2: that country and like, but but it's hard because we're human.

1815
01:30:05,200 --> 01:30:08,160
Speaker 6: So you see, Like that's why you see like I'm.

1816
01:30:07,960 --> 01:30:12,280
Speaker 2: A prisoner abolitionist, but the Conet Shop, Brionna Taylor and

1817
01:30:12,560 --> 01:30:14,840
Speaker 2: like these motherfuckers got to be like and I get

1818
01:30:14,840 --> 01:30:17,160
Speaker 2: it because we're human, Like this is like we're not

1819
01:30:17,200 --> 01:30:20,000
Speaker 2: gonna have We're not a it's not a test where

1820
01:30:20,000 --> 01:30:22,479
Speaker 2: it's like this was true and this was false. It's

1821
01:30:22,520 --> 01:30:25,680
Speaker 2: all gray area. But I think in order for us

1822
01:30:25,720 --> 01:30:27,320
Speaker 2: to get to some of these goals. We're gonna have

1823
01:30:27,320 --> 01:30:29,160
Speaker 2: to be able to do that ship and I don't

1824
01:30:29,200 --> 01:30:31,920
Speaker 2: know that. I don't know if I'm gonna make it

1825
01:30:31,960 --> 01:30:34,439
Speaker 2: all the way, but I'm working on it, you knowriving.

1826
01:30:34,520 --> 01:30:36,160
Speaker 5: I'm trying my best, yob.

1827
01:30:38,680 --> 01:30:41,559
Speaker 4: I mean, and all all you can do, all any

1828
01:30:41,600 --> 01:30:44,519
Speaker 4: of us, all I can do is, you know, work

1829
01:30:44,600 --> 01:30:49,320
Speaker 4: on ourselves and then hopefully offer that feel like here

1830
01:30:49,400 --> 01:30:52,920
Speaker 4: is something that I am working on or did figure out,

1831
01:30:53,120 --> 01:30:56,280
Speaker 4: or like seems like I have Like here's here's another

1832
01:30:56,280 --> 01:30:59,160
Speaker 4: thing that I thought of earlier that Rene and my

1833
01:30:59,160 --> 01:31:01,719
Speaker 4: girlfriend helped me with in the past couple of years.

1834
01:31:02,479 --> 01:31:05,599
Speaker 4: UH is like sometimes you know, you get you get

1835
01:31:05,600 --> 01:31:08,280
Speaker 4: a text from someone or you're texting someone and you

1836
01:31:08,360 --> 01:31:11,000
Speaker 4: read into their tone, but you don't know what their

1837
01:31:11,080 --> 01:31:15,040
Speaker 4: tone is, and so REDI will always like offer to

1838
01:31:15,080 --> 01:31:17,639
Speaker 4: me UH and to other people if if they're willing

1839
01:31:17,720 --> 01:31:18,800
Speaker 4: to accept it, be.

1840
01:31:18,880 --> 01:31:22,200
Speaker 3: Like, is it possible that it was like a fine tone?

1841
01:31:22,320 --> 01:31:25,360
Speaker 4: Is it possible that the tone is coming from inside

1842
01:31:25,760 --> 01:31:28,040
Speaker 4: the you? If you like, if like they feel like this,

1843
01:31:28,240 --> 01:31:31,240
Speaker 4: they think that you don't have any access other than

1844
01:31:31,280 --> 01:31:33,479
Speaker 4: to their You only have access to their words when

1845
01:31:33,479 --> 01:31:36,800
Speaker 4: there's no tone at all, And here's a thing that

1846
01:31:37,280 --> 01:31:42,840
Speaker 4: even larger than that. Uh my my dad and mom

1847
01:31:42,920 --> 01:31:45,519
Speaker 4: got divorced when I, like when I was like fourteen

1848
01:31:45,640 --> 01:31:48,160
Speaker 4: or so, and so for the past twenty five years

1849
01:31:48,240 --> 01:31:50,160
Speaker 4: or more now, my dad has been remarried to a

1850
01:31:50,200 --> 01:31:54,160
Speaker 4: woman who like my I have a good relationship.

1851
01:31:53,720 --> 01:31:57,679
Speaker 3: With my dad. I love my dad, like I.

1852
01:31:56,520 --> 01:31:59,720
Speaker 4: I see I see him like pretty you know, in

1853
01:31:59,760 --> 01:32:01,880
Speaker 4: the I would see him pretty regularly. He lives like

1854
01:32:01,880 --> 01:32:04,760
Speaker 4: an hour away from me, and sometimes it would be

1855
01:32:04,760 --> 01:32:07,720
Speaker 4: on holidays, like with with the whole that side of

1856
01:32:07,720 --> 01:32:10,840
Speaker 4: the family. But there's like I didn't have like a

1857
01:32:10,880 --> 01:32:14,000
Speaker 4: lot of opportunity to like get to know my stepmother

1858
01:32:14,160 --> 01:32:16,920
Speaker 4: one on one. So it's like always there together or

1859
01:32:17,120 --> 01:32:21,080
Speaker 4: it's a big family thing more likely. And so when

1860
01:32:21,080 --> 01:32:24,920
Speaker 4: I was a kid, when I was like, you know, fourteen, fifteen, fifteen, metter, like,

1861
01:32:26,120 --> 01:32:29,720
Speaker 4: our relationships started in a way that was like I

1862
01:32:29,800 --> 01:32:30,520
Speaker 4: was a teenager.

1863
01:32:30,640 --> 01:32:33,840
Speaker 3: She was a new you know, newly a step mother.

1864
01:32:34,280 --> 01:32:37,800
Speaker 4: Like we didn't we I don't think either of us

1865
01:32:37,920 --> 01:32:40,240
Speaker 4: ever disliked each other at all.

1866
01:32:40,479 --> 01:32:42,439
Speaker 3: I know for sure that I didn't.

1867
01:32:42,840 --> 01:32:45,800
Speaker 4: And now, based on things that have happened that I'll

1868
01:32:45,800 --> 01:32:49,360
Speaker 4: get to at a moment I'm positive as close as

1869
01:32:49,400 --> 01:32:52,280
Speaker 4: possible that she also didn't like that we were both

1870
01:32:52,600 --> 01:32:56,160
Speaker 4: like we both love my dad. We both were like

1871
01:32:56,280 --> 01:32:59,280
Speaker 4: kind of you know, like two cats, like getting to

1872
01:32:59,560 --> 01:33:01,720
Speaker 4: being like like what's gonna are you going to?

1873
01:33:02,320 --> 01:33:04,439
Speaker 3: What are you gonna do? Are you gonna do anything?

1874
01:33:04,880 --> 01:33:07,680
Speaker 4: And so I was going through my own, like you know,

1875
01:33:08,040 --> 01:33:11,360
Speaker 4: challenging high school experience and she was going through her

1876
01:33:11,400 --> 01:33:15,479
Speaker 4: own her experience that I don't know almost anything about

1877
01:33:15,520 --> 01:33:16,640
Speaker 4: and the things that I do, and I'm like, oh,

1878
01:33:16,760 --> 01:33:20,160
Speaker 4: of course, like we're all going through our own shit.

1879
01:33:20,640 --> 01:33:22,679
Speaker 3: And so I remember specifically.

1880
01:33:22,120 --> 01:33:26,200
Speaker 4: One time, like, uh, my dad was like, hey, whenever

1881
01:33:26,240 --> 01:33:28,960
Speaker 4: you call, like you know, if Maria answers the phone,

1882
01:33:29,360 --> 01:33:32,040
Speaker 4: like why not like ask her how she's doing instead

1883
01:33:32,040 --> 01:33:34,240
Speaker 4: of saying, is my dad there? And so I remember

1884
01:33:34,320 --> 01:33:36,559
Speaker 4: I tried that once and like and she was just like, oh,

1885
01:33:36,680 --> 01:33:38,840
Speaker 4: I'll get your dad, like and I don't remember the

1886
01:33:38,880 --> 01:33:41,479
Speaker 4: exact tone or language, and I'm like, hey, weren't weren't

1887
01:33:41,479 --> 01:33:41,920
Speaker 4: we supposed to?

1888
01:33:42,000 --> 01:33:44,360
Speaker 3: Like I did? I did what I was supposed to do, like.

1889
01:33:44,240 --> 01:33:47,759
Speaker 4: What was And and that's like the only data point

1890
01:33:47,800 --> 01:33:51,160
Speaker 4: I have of of being like, uh, like some other

1891
01:33:51,160 --> 01:33:53,280
Speaker 4: people like well, she is she the adult? Is she

1892
01:33:53,400 --> 01:33:56,439
Speaker 4: whose responsibility is it? And like now we've both been

1893
01:33:56,479 --> 01:34:01,040
Speaker 4: adults for the past several decades. And I was talking

1894
01:34:01,040 --> 01:34:03,200
Speaker 4: about it with my girlfriend and she was like, what

1895
01:34:03,439 --> 01:34:06,920
Speaker 4: do you what would you want from her? Like if

1896
01:34:06,960 --> 01:34:09,280
Speaker 4: you want I'm like, there's no problem. There's there was

1897
01:34:09,360 --> 01:34:13,640
Speaker 4: no problem at all, Like everything is fine. Uh, But

1898
01:34:13,680 --> 01:34:16,200
Speaker 4: I'm like, but if if I could have my greatest wish,

1899
01:34:16,479 --> 01:34:18,599
Speaker 4: like what would I wish for? Like, oh, what if

1900
01:34:18,800 --> 01:34:21,880
Speaker 4: what if she like reached out to me, like and

1901
01:34:22,320 --> 01:34:24,720
Speaker 4: asked to get to know me in a in a

1902
01:34:24,800 --> 01:34:28,479
Speaker 4: more like specific way, in a you know, like what

1903
01:34:28,680 --> 01:34:30,720
Speaker 4: And she's like, oh, so that's what that's what you'd like.

1904
01:34:30,920 --> 01:34:33,920
Speaker 4: My girlfriend says to me, like laying a trap, and

1905
01:34:33,960 --> 01:34:36,680
Speaker 4: I'm like, yeah, that's that's what I That's what I

1906
01:34:36,720 --> 01:34:41,880
Speaker 4: would want. She's like, well could you reach out to her?

1907
01:34:42,040 --> 01:34:45,160
Speaker 3: And this, yeah, okay, that you're you're.

1908
01:34:45,040 --> 01:34:50,000
Speaker 4: Wishing for someone to reach out and the only you

1909
01:34:50,040 --> 01:34:51,639
Speaker 4: can grant that wish.

1910
01:34:51,960 --> 01:34:53,920
Speaker 2: I have, Like I have a saying that I say

1911
01:34:53,920 --> 01:34:59,160
Speaker 2: on the show sometimes, but it's called phones ways. Oh yes,

1912
01:34:59,360 --> 01:35:02,439
Speaker 2: a little except that I've learned over the course of

1913
01:35:02,479 --> 01:35:02,920
Speaker 2: my life.

1914
01:35:03,000 --> 01:35:05,240
Speaker 7: It's a down tone on both sides. I know I've

1915
01:35:05,240 --> 01:35:07,560
Speaker 7: got down tones anymore, you know, I know that's the

1916
01:35:07,640 --> 01:35:10,200
Speaker 7: thing of the past. It's down tones on both sides.

1917
01:35:10,840 --> 01:35:15,400
Speaker 4: It's so perfect that like even in my life situation,

1918
01:35:15,520 --> 01:35:18,800
Speaker 4: my dad once like a few years ago, left me

1919
01:35:18,840 --> 01:35:22,080
Speaker 4: a message and I listened to it and he was like, hey,

1920
01:35:22,200 --> 01:35:24,439
Speaker 4: I hadn't talked to you in a little while, but

1921
01:35:24,760 --> 01:35:27,400
Speaker 4: I guess I also didn't call, so you know, I

1922
01:35:27,479 --> 01:35:31,400
Speaker 4: was like, what a great like not there's no like, hey,

1923
01:35:31,600 --> 01:35:34,479
Speaker 4: why didn't that person do exactly what I didn't do?

1924
01:35:34,680 --> 01:35:38,240
Speaker 2: Also, and so yeah, I know you were talking about

1925
01:35:38,240 --> 01:35:41,160
Speaker 2: Buddhism earlier, but it's like that the concept of right

1926
01:35:41,240 --> 01:35:46,040
Speaker 2: thinking where you like and not right is in like

1927
01:35:46,160 --> 01:35:49,360
Speaker 2: correct but like almost like efficient, you know what I mean.

1928
01:35:49,479 --> 01:35:53,120
Speaker 2: So like like clean clean, like clean thinking, so as

1929
01:35:53,200 --> 01:35:57,360
Speaker 2: like what impulses are coming from you? What are you

1930
01:35:57,400 --> 01:36:01,400
Speaker 2: feeling in the voice of life? You know what I mean?

1931
01:36:01,439 --> 01:36:05,640
Speaker 2: So like this happened ironically, this happened with me and

1932
01:36:05,720 --> 01:36:09,639
Speaker 2: Mike where it was all on my side Mike. Mike

1933
01:36:09,720 --> 01:36:11,760
Speaker 2: had emailed us, and then there was a period of

1934
01:36:11,760 --> 01:36:13,559
Speaker 2: time where I just lost track of all the emails

1935
01:36:13,560 --> 01:36:16,400
Speaker 2: in our box. It was terrible and I was going

1936
01:36:16,400 --> 01:36:18,280
Speaker 2: the wrong places, Like I just was thinking like, oh,

1937
01:36:18,320 --> 01:36:20,320
Speaker 2: you have answered these emails, and then I like, to

1938
01:36:20,400 --> 01:36:22,800
Speaker 2: my great shot, some.

1939
01:36:22,720 --> 01:36:23,919
Speaker 5: Of a lot of them went unanswered.

1940
01:36:23,960 --> 01:36:26,080
Speaker 2: Kid asked to come on the show to promote something,

1941
01:36:26,240 --> 01:36:28,040
Speaker 2: and when by the time out side of email, it

1942
01:36:28,080 --> 01:36:30,519
Speaker 2: was so it was so long, like it was like

1943
01:36:30,680 --> 01:36:33,280
Speaker 2: a month or two, like it was way past when

1944
01:36:33,280 --> 01:36:34,960
Speaker 2: he would have needed to be on to promote the thing.

1945
01:36:35,040 --> 01:36:38,320
Speaker 2: And I was like, okay, so I have fucked this

1946
01:36:38,400 --> 01:36:39,200
Speaker 2: relationship up.

1947
01:36:39,840 --> 01:36:42,800
Speaker 5: This is like like you you're like, this is the end.

1948
01:36:42,800 --> 01:36:45,600
Speaker 2: I was like, he would I would understand it understandably

1949
01:36:45,600 --> 01:36:48,080
Speaker 2: if he was upset by this, that that would make

1950
01:36:48,120 --> 01:36:50,559
Speaker 2: a lot of sense. He finally thought, I ignored him,

1951
01:36:51,040 --> 01:36:53,679
Speaker 2: and now enough time has passed it where it would

1952
01:36:53,840 --> 01:36:57,240
Speaker 2: almost be ridiculous to say, hey, three months ago you

1953
01:36:57,240 --> 01:36:58,040
Speaker 2: wanted to come on the show.

1954
01:36:58,240 --> 01:37:00,760
Speaker 6: Come on the show now when it's too late to.

1955
01:37:00,720 --> 01:37:03,400
Speaker 2: Do the thing, you know. So, and then it built

1956
01:37:03,479 --> 01:37:05,920
Speaker 2: up in my head where I'd be like, oh, man,

1957
01:37:06,040 --> 01:37:08,639
Speaker 2: like I you see I've seen Mike tweets something cool

1958
01:37:08,760 --> 01:37:10,880
Speaker 2: or whatever, and I'll retweeted or whatever. But I but

1959
01:37:10,920 --> 01:37:15,160
Speaker 2: I would be like, ah, man, I apologized, do I

1960
01:37:15,280 --> 01:37:18,320
Speaker 2: like do I just pretend it didn't happen and maybe

1961
01:37:18,360 --> 01:37:22,280
Speaker 2: he's forgotten about it or whatever. And uh, I think

1962
01:37:22,280 --> 01:37:24,400
Speaker 2: he reached out to either be on the show again

1963
01:37:24,560 --> 01:37:26,439
Speaker 2: or something. And I was thinking, I was like, oh, wait,

1964
01:37:27,720 --> 01:37:30,080
Speaker 2: I guess he's not mad or whatever. And then and

1965
01:37:30,280 --> 01:37:31,840
Speaker 2: and now I'm like, well, you know what, I'm just

1966
01:37:31,880 --> 01:37:34,559
Speaker 2: gonna bring it up and be like, dude, I feel

1967
01:37:34,640 --> 01:37:36,479
Speaker 2: terrible blah blah blah. And he's just like I wasn't

1968
01:37:36,479 --> 01:37:38,640
Speaker 2: even thinking about that ship. So I had filled in

1969
01:37:39,320 --> 01:37:43,200
Speaker 2: all in all this void. I had just dumped my

1970
01:37:43,360 --> 01:37:46,680
Speaker 2: insecurity into it. And and and what was fucked up

1971
01:37:46,720 --> 01:37:49,800
Speaker 2: is I've turned Mike into not not a monster or anything,

1972
01:37:49,840 --> 01:37:52,479
Speaker 2: but just like I've turned him into angry, I've turned

1973
01:37:52,560 --> 01:37:55,000
Speaker 2: him into upset. I've heard turned I've turned.

1974
01:37:54,840 --> 01:37:57,120
Speaker 5: Him into I've hurt his feelings, right.

1975
01:37:57,080 --> 01:37:58,880
Speaker 2: I've turned him into what I need him to be

1976
01:37:59,000 --> 01:38:02,040
Speaker 2: for my story and my insecurity to make sense. And

1977
01:38:02,080 --> 01:38:03,840
Speaker 2: I think that's what happens a lot of times, is

1978
01:38:03,880 --> 01:38:07,400
Speaker 2: like we just feeling these voids and stuff, you know,

1979
01:38:07,560 --> 01:38:09,840
Speaker 2: with your and the instead we don't take the action

1980
01:38:10,000 --> 01:38:12,120
Speaker 2: we could have taken, which is, hey, I could have

1981
01:38:12,200 --> 01:38:14,360
Speaker 2: emailed and be like dude, I fucked up. I was

1982
01:38:14,479 --> 01:38:17,240
Speaker 2: looking at my emails. I just realized this and that

1983
01:38:17,280 --> 01:38:18,960
Speaker 2: would at the time it would have been like say

1984
01:38:19,000 --> 01:38:23,519
Speaker 2: two months as opposed to two years. But I now,

1985
01:38:23,560 --> 01:38:27,320
Speaker 2: what I do know is the void is there because

1986
01:38:27,320 --> 01:38:30,439
Speaker 2: I didn't like that void didn't need to be there

1987
01:38:30,439 --> 01:38:32,960
Speaker 2: as well, right, so like it could have been two

1988
01:38:33,040 --> 01:38:35,599
Speaker 2: years of Mike coming on the show all the time

1989
01:38:35,640 --> 01:38:37,599
Speaker 2: and us hanging out and talking and chatting and all

1990
01:38:37,640 --> 01:38:40,320
Speaker 2: the shit. So I learned from that lesson was like

1991
01:38:40,640 --> 01:38:43,400
Speaker 2: you know, and maybe you could say you needed it

1992
01:38:43,439 --> 01:38:45,280
Speaker 2: to learn the lesson, but I learned to be like

1993
01:38:45,360 --> 01:38:47,679
Speaker 2: more like proactive and be like no, no, no, don't

1994
01:38:47,880 --> 01:38:52,040
Speaker 2: let negative thinking feel that. Fill it with, fill it

1995
01:38:52,040 --> 01:38:55,120
Speaker 2: with nothing, like in a weird way, like like don't

1996
01:38:55,160 --> 01:38:58,519
Speaker 2: assume just you know, maybe he'll it'll be fine. And

1997
01:38:58,560 --> 01:39:00,960
Speaker 2: I think that was a big, a big thing for me.

1998
01:39:01,120 --> 01:39:03,800
Speaker 2: So I think that's one of the things when you're

1999
01:39:03,800 --> 01:39:07,960
Speaker 2: talking about your Stepmam, is like that one interaction and

2000
01:39:07,960 --> 01:39:10,680
Speaker 2: then there's not a lot of interaction to even go

2001
01:39:10,760 --> 01:39:13,920
Speaker 2: off of, and it does fill itself in with whatever

2002
01:39:14,680 --> 01:39:15,760
Speaker 2: you have inside of you.

2003
01:39:15,920 --> 01:39:19,479
Speaker 6: It's like whatever. So if you feel like maybe.

2004
01:39:19,320 --> 01:39:22,240
Speaker 2: It's maybe she doesn't like you, then it's gonna fill

2005
01:39:22,240 --> 01:39:23,519
Speaker 2: in with maybe she doesn't like you.

2006
01:39:24,600 --> 01:39:28,680
Speaker 4: And I want to first of all, thank you. And

2007
01:39:28,840 --> 01:39:31,760
Speaker 4: I do remember it was like twenty seventeen that my

2008
01:39:31,880 --> 01:39:35,400
Speaker 4: last album came out that when I reached out to you,

2009
01:39:35,560 --> 01:39:38,519
Speaker 4: and then uh it was for this year, you know,

2010
01:39:38,680 --> 01:39:41,880
Speaker 4: my newest album, like back in you know, March April May.

2011
01:39:42,160 --> 01:39:45,240
Speaker 4: I got in touch and that's when we had the conversation. Yeah,

2012
01:39:45,320 --> 01:39:49,200
Speaker 4: and I absolved you of uh you know, there's nothing

2013
01:39:49,280 --> 01:39:52,519
Speaker 4: to forgive because there was no rule, Like it would

2014
01:39:52,520 --> 01:39:54,320
Speaker 4: have been really fun to come on the podcast three

2015
01:39:54,400 --> 01:39:57,040
Speaker 4: years ago, but it's just as it's even more fun

2016
01:39:57,080 --> 01:39:59,599
Speaker 4: to be on then and now, and like, I want

2017
01:39:59,600 --> 01:40:02,400
Speaker 4: to come out like as many times as often as

2018
01:40:02,520 --> 01:40:05,000
Speaker 4: you'll want me to be on, Like I want to

2019
01:40:05,040 --> 01:40:07,360
Speaker 4: be here, and I want to do a fun bit

2020
01:40:07,520 --> 01:40:09,360
Speaker 4: real quick and then I'll finish my step mom story.

2021
01:40:09,360 --> 01:40:11,880
Speaker 3: But this is just a bit, entirely a bit.

2022
01:40:12,520 --> 01:40:14,960
Speaker 4: I do want to tell you, Rod that I am

2023
01:40:15,040 --> 01:40:17,719
Speaker 4: The only thing that I am mad at you about

2024
01:40:18,080 --> 01:40:21,240
Speaker 4: is how big a deal you keep making my not

2025
01:40:21,360 --> 01:40:26,639
Speaker 4: caring about like, just let it go, man, Okay, So that.

2026
01:40:26,720 --> 01:40:30,000
Speaker 5: Is forgive, forgive your silk.

2027
01:40:31,360 --> 01:40:33,920
Speaker 3: Yeah, you're the only one. You have all the power

2028
01:40:34,040 --> 01:40:37,120
Speaker 3: to forgive yourself. Stop making me do it.

2029
01:40:38,760 --> 01:40:43,360
Speaker 4: So I my dad turned seventy in the past couple

2030
01:40:43,400 --> 01:40:46,479
Speaker 4: of years and it might have just been last year,

2031
01:40:46,800 --> 01:40:51,559
Speaker 4: and I there there he had a surprise party and

2032
01:40:52,200 --> 01:40:54,479
Speaker 4: his wife reached out to me to invite me to

2033
01:40:54,560 --> 01:40:58,760
Speaker 4: surprise party. And I took that as an opportunity that

2034
01:40:58,760 --> 01:41:02,120
Speaker 4: that Rene had encouraged me to be like why why not?

2035
01:41:02,280 --> 01:41:06,400
Speaker 4: Why not, like take take the step that you want

2036
01:41:06,439 --> 01:41:10,720
Speaker 4: to happen. And so I wrote her a note like

2037
01:41:11,200 --> 01:41:14,120
Speaker 4: about like I didn't you know, didn't cover everything that

2038
01:41:14,160 --> 01:41:18,599
Speaker 4: I'd ever felt, but basically just like I, I write

2039
01:41:19,000 --> 01:41:23,840
Speaker 4: and communicate for a living about how I feel and

2040
01:41:24,240 --> 01:41:27,360
Speaker 4: often challenging things. And I'm like, this is a thing

2041
01:41:27,400 --> 01:41:30,360
Speaker 4: that I just did it because I really thought I

2042
01:41:30,479 --> 01:41:32,719
Speaker 4: was telling the story, filling the blank in my head

2043
01:41:32,880 --> 01:41:37,000
Speaker 4: that she felt away or was away or anything that

2044
01:41:37,040 --> 01:41:38,320
Speaker 4: I could do, What could.

2045
01:41:38,040 --> 01:41:40,160
Speaker 3: I do, and what I could do?

2046
01:41:40,280 --> 01:41:42,400
Speaker 4: And I was like, I'm not going to guarantee your response,

2047
01:41:42,600 --> 01:41:45,920
Speaker 4: like there's obviously all I can do is be like, hey,

2048
01:41:46,200 --> 01:41:48,880
Speaker 4: like I love my dad, you love my dad, Like

2049
01:41:49,000 --> 01:41:52,320
Speaker 4: we don't know each other as well as if we

2050
01:41:52,479 --> 01:41:55,519
Speaker 4: got to know each other better, and I'm interested in that.

2051
01:41:55,960 --> 01:41:57,960
Speaker 3: And because you must be.

2052
01:41:58,200 --> 01:42:01,040
Speaker 4: I from everything I know about you, I know your family,

2053
01:42:01,120 --> 01:42:02,400
Speaker 4: I know your connection.

2054
01:42:02,160 --> 01:42:02,760
Speaker 3: To my dad.

2055
01:42:03,040 --> 01:42:05,920
Speaker 4: Like we it seems like we've got a lot in

2056
01:42:06,000 --> 01:42:09,679
Speaker 4: common other than we've never had this conversation to really

2057
01:42:09,800 --> 01:42:15,000
Speaker 4: any specific one on one conversation, which is like nobody

2058
01:42:15,160 --> 01:42:16,120
Speaker 4: nobody's fault.

2059
01:42:16,280 --> 01:42:18,360
Speaker 3: It's as opposed to everybody's fault.

2060
01:42:18,439 --> 01:42:21,719
Speaker 4: It's like there is no wrong here, and so whatever

2061
01:42:21,760 --> 01:42:24,080
Speaker 4: it is, I reached out and I shared that, and

2062
01:42:24,360 --> 01:42:27,680
Speaker 4: she wrote back kindly, and because of.

2063
01:42:27,640 --> 01:42:30,559
Speaker 3: Course she did, why wouldn't she, And that party happened.

2064
01:42:30,600 --> 01:42:33,160
Speaker 4: And then after that, I think, so this was I

2065
01:42:33,160 --> 01:42:35,880
Speaker 4: think last year or the year before, Like my dad,

2066
01:42:35,960 --> 01:42:37,719
Speaker 4: my dad comes to see my shows all the time.

2067
01:42:37,840 --> 01:42:40,160
Speaker 4: She had never come to see a show. She came

2068
01:42:40,200 --> 01:42:43,439
Speaker 4: to like my next several shows with my dad that

2069
01:42:43,680 --> 01:42:47,240
Speaker 4: and I was just like, this is unlike unfathomable to

2070
01:42:47,400 --> 01:42:50,680
Speaker 4: my past self, and it makes complete sense to my

2071
01:42:50,920 --> 01:42:51,599
Speaker 4: current self.

2072
01:42:51,640 --> 01:42:52,920
Speaker 3: And like the last time.

2073
01:42:53,000 --> 01:42:55,760
Speaker 4: It was her birthday recently, and I you know, I

2074
01:42:56,360 --> 01:42:58,600
Speaker 4: her mother passed away earlier this year, and so I

2075
01:42:58,640 --> 01:43:01,439
Speaker 4: had some trees planted in her honor and told her

2076
01:43:01,439 --> 01:43:04,000
Speaker 4: about it, and she was very grateful, and I called

2077
01:43:04,040 --> 01:43:07,400
Speaker 4: her on her birthday and it was just like the

2078
01:43:07,479 --> 01:43:12,320
Speaker 4: warmest conversation I'd ever had with her, and it was like,

2079
01:43:13,080 --> 01:43:16,040
Speaker 4: it's so weird to me that it was surprise. I

2080
01:43:16,080 --> 01:43:19,360
Speaker 4: was like, how did I mean? I I what clearly

2081
01:43:19,439 --> 01:43:22,960
Speaker 4: wasn't capable, Like I didn't know that I could do this.

2082
01:43:23,080 --> 01:43:25,880
Speaker 4: I didn't know that I could get to this place

2083
01:43:26,200 --> 01:43:32,160
Speaker 4: because it wasn't it wasn't her, it wasn't anybody's individual responsibility.

2084
01:43:32,479 --> 01:43:36,000
Speaker 4: It was one hundred percent a two way street that

2085
01:43:36,160 --> 01:43:37,920
Speaker 4: who knows what she was thinking.

2086
01:43:37,640 --> 01:43:39,439
Speaker 3: About me and who knows what was she was thinking

2087
01:43:39,439 --> 01:43:39,760
Speaker 3: about me?

2088
01:43:39,960 --> 01:43:44,160
Speaker 4: That was true because neither of us was taking actions,

2089
01:43:44,200 --> 01:43:46,320
Speaker 4: so were all there was was potential.

2090
01:43:46,600 --> 01:43:50,800
Speaker 2: I wonder if almost like the grudge thing, if that's

2091
01:43:50,920 --> 01:43:54,360
Speaker 2: almost a form of holding on to control because if

2092
01:43:54,360 --> 01:43:58,640
Speaker 2: you don't ever pull the trigger on there has to

2093
01:43:58,680 --> 01:44:00,519
Speaker 2: be a better phrase and pull the trigger if you don't,

2094
01:44:01,000 --> 01:44:05,840
Speaker 2: if you don't ever release the hug on uh the

2095
01:44:05,640 --> 01:44:09,000
Speaker 2: on that on, like closing that gap. I guess in

2096
01:44:09,040 --> 01:44:13,839
Speaker 2: a way it is a measure of like weird intellectual stalemate,

2097
01:44:13,960 --> 01:44:17,360
Speaker 2: like it's like nothing's changing, you know what I'm saying

2098
01:44:17,400 --> 01:44:20,320
Speaker 2: so like even to get out of your comfort zone

2099
01:44:20,360 --> 01:44:23,840
Speaker 2: and say, you know, shout Darini, admit to yourself like,

2100
01:44:24,240 --> 01:44:29,320
Speaker 2: oh wait, I want this thing. Why am I making

2101
01:44:29,360 --> 01:44:32,120
Speaker 2: it a thing for them to do instead of getting

2102
01:44:32,120 --> 01:44:34,479
Speaker 2: out of the ring myself? Why like, I'm gonna make

2103
01:44:34,520 --> 01:44:38,240
Speaker 2: the move and and and find the fulfillment in that

2104
01:44:38,320 --> 01:44:41,959
Speaker 2: journey as opposed to the one where I'm not really comfortable,

2105
01:44:41,960 --> 01:44:46,080
Speaker 2: but I'm familiar in my uncomfortableness of not knowing yes.

2106
01:44:46,120 --> 01:44:50,519
Speaker 7: And Also, I think the biggest thing is the fear

2107
01:44:50,880 --> 01:44:55,920
Speaker 7: of what they thought being true prevents you from doing that.

2108
01:44:56,560 --> 01:44:59,680
Speaker 7: And you have to be okay with true. If it

2109
01:44:59,760 --> 01:45:01,400
Speaker 7: comes is that positive, I'm okay.

2110
01:45:03,000 --> 01:45:05,280
Speaker 2: Note she could never contact me again, right right.

2111
01:45:05,479 --> 01:45:08,680
Speaker 7: And if it comes out negative, you have to be

2112
01:45:08,920 --> 01:45:12,200
Speaker 7: okay with that too. And you have to say, at

2113
01:45:12,320 --> 01:45:15,559
Speaker 7: least I did my part like like like like like

2114
01:45:15,680 --> 01:45:17,479
Speaker 7: you said, like you're said, Mike at the beginning, you

2115
01:45:17,920 --> 01:45:20,360
Speaker 7: I did what I did within my control.

2116
01:45:20,720 --> 01:45:23,320
Speaker 5: I cannot control how anybody responds.

2117
01:45:23,400 --> 01:45:26,080
Speaker 7: I can only control how I respond back to the situation,

2118
01:45:26,479 --> 01:45:29,599
Speaker 7: and I am accountable for how I respond back. And

2119
01:45:29,640 --> 01:45:32,720
Speaker 7: I think that's a varying that fear prevents people from

2120
01:45:32,720 --> 01:45:34,840
Speaker 7: doing a lot of things as far as with you

2121
01:45:34,960 --> 01:45:37,840
Speaker 7: now and opportunities because of like, well, what happened if

2122
01:45:37,840 --> 01:45:39,840
Speaker 7: the thing I made up in my mind? It's true,

2123
01:45:40,400 --> 01:45:44,800
Speaker 7: But the thing is you you prevent growth and you

2124
01:45:44,880 --> 01:45:47,880
Speaker 7: prevent the other person from expressing themselves and letting them

2125
01:45:47,880 --> 01:45:49,559
Speaker 7: know because a lot of times when you do reach out,

2126
01:45:49,560 --> 01:45:52,040
Speaker 7: even if it's not the response, you won't at least

2127
01:45:52,080 --> 01:45:54,680
Speaker 7: you know how they felt about the situation versus you

2128
01:45:54,760 --> 01:45:56,920
Speaker 7: making the thing up in your own mind. And be

2129
01:45:57,040 --> 01:46:00,000
Speaker 7: okay with walking away, be okay with saying, this relationship

2130
01:46:00,240 --> 01:46:04,320
Speaker 7: is what it is. And I'm happy, uh for learning

2131
01:46:04,360 --> 01:46:06,439
Speaker 7: whatever it is I learned out of the situation, being

2132
01:46:06,479 --> 01:46:08,559
Speaker 7: I learned about me, be it I learned about you,

2133
01:46:08,680 --> 01:46:10,880
Speaker 7: being I learned about us. Like Mike said, be it

2134
01:46:10,920 --> 01:46:14,320
Speaker 7: bought us closer together and it might bring us further apart.

2135
01:46:14,400 --> 01:46:17,120
Speaker 5: But but but just use it as a learning experience

2136
01:46:17,160 --> 01:46:18,120
Speaker 5: because that's part of life.

2137
01:46:18,360 --> 01:46:21,519
Speaker 7: And I think that fear prevents people from being the

2138
01:46:21,560 --> 01:46:23,200
Speaker 7: best versions of themselves.

2139
01:46:23,320 --> 01:46:27,559
Speaker 2: That's one of the ways that I've been able to use,

2140
01:46:27,960 --> 01:46:32,439
Speaker 2: like uh to learn from conflict and stuff that I think.

2141
01:46:32,560 --> 01:46:36,120
Speaker 2: You know sometimes you know my friends friends, they know

2142
01:46:36,280 --> 01:46:39,360
Speaker 2: and understand but uh, to some people, they don't understand.

2143
01:46:39,360 --> 01:46:41,040
Speaker 2: But that's one of the ways I've been able that

2144
01:46:41,080 --> 01:46:44,160
Speaker 2: I can move on from shit. It's really just being like, Okay,

2145
01:46:44,320 --> 01:46:46,679
Speaker 2: we went down this journey. I find out some things

2146
01:46:46,720 --> 01:46:49,120
Speaker 2: that I needed, like that I needed, I'll take the

2147
01:46:49,160 --> 01:46:52,400
Speaker 2: positive for me, and then the rest of this I'm

2148
01:46:52,479 --> 01:46:55,760
Speaker 2: letting go, you know. And I think that's uh, it

2149
01:46:55,880 --> 01:46:58,240
Speaker 2: becomes easier with practice. Like I think at first it

2150
01:46:58,280 --> 01:47:00,000
Speaker 2: was a hard thing to do because like I want read,

2151
01:47:00,720 --> 01:47:03,360
Speaker 2: I want I want an answer, I want you to

2152
01:47:03,400 --> 01:47:06,639
Speaker 2: say I'm right, I want to be understood. And then

2153
01:47:06,840 --> 01:47:09,160
Speaker 2: when I let go of like, wait, everyone's not gonna

2154
01:47:09,200 --> 01:47:13,120
Speaker 2: understand you. That's ridiculous. Uh, I was able to be like, Okay,

2155
01:47:13,160 --> 01:47:15,160
Speaker 2: it's cool. I this is what I learned from this,

2156
01:47:15,360 --> 01:47:18,120
Speaker 2: you know, like, and you take your thing from it,

2157
01:47:18,200 --> 01:47:18,360
Speaker 2: you know.

2158
01:47:18,479 --> 01:47:18,639
Speaker 4: Yeah.

2159
01:47:18,720 --> 01:47:21,960
Speaker 7: Also, I think sometimes people put demands on other people,

2160
01:47:22,400 --> 01:47:26,720
Speaker 7: and they put standards on other people and expectations on

2161
01:47:26,760 --> 01:47:29,639
Speaker 7: them that they didn't ask for, and then they expect

2162
01:47:29,680 --> 01:47:32,439
Speaker 7: that result because like we hammered them for not living

2163
01:47:32,520 --> 01:47:35,400
Speaker 7: up to expectations that they have no fucking idea about

2164
01:47:35,560 --> 01:47:38,680
Speaker 7: right right something that and everyone's been a victim of

2165
01:47:38,720 --> 01:47:41,040
Speaker 7: that I think, yes, because I know I've had that.

2166
01:47:40,920 --> 01:47:45,120
Speaker 2: Where you didn't call me every week and do such

2167
01:47:45,160 --> 01:47:48,200
Speaker 2: and such. I'm like, this was never a conversation we had.

2168
01:47:48,240 --> 01:47:50,320
Speaker 2: This is how was I supposed to know?

2169
01:47:50,439 --> 01:47:50,960
Speaker 5: That's the thing?

2170
01:47:51,040 --> 01:47:55,880
Speaker 2: I mean this, Uh, this happened with a relative of

2171
01:47:55,920 --> 01:47:57,360
Speaker 2: mine last year.

2172
01:47:58,000 --> 01:48:00,920
Speaker 3: Where can I really correct fun bit I want to do.

2173
01:48:01,280 --> 01:48:03,599
Speaker 4: Hey, I'm mad at you because you didn't read my mind.

2174
01:48:03,880 --> 01:48:07,040
Speaker 2: Yes, yes, you didn't use your superpowers to read my

2175
01:48:07,080 --> 01:48:09,320
Speaker 2: mind and know exactly what to do. But I had

2176
01:48:09,320 --> 01:48:11,400
Speaker 2: a relative that I was losing a bit of a

2177
01:48:11,400 --> 01:48:13,559
Speaker 2: connection with and they kind of like called me and

2178
01:48:13,560 --> 01:48:16,479
Speaker 2: they were upset about something. And it was like really

2179
01:48:16,800 --> 01:48:22,280
Speaker 2: like almost like confrontational first, and I remember during the

2180
01:48:22,360 --> 01:48:26,040
Speaker 2: conversation starting to understand like, wait, don't think of this

2181
01:48:26,120 --> 01:48:29,840
Speaker 2: as a conflict. You have to wind or debate, you

2182
01:48:29,920 --> 01:48:33,240
Speaker 2: have to like come out on top, like to justify

2183
01:48:33,320 --> 01:48:36,679
Speaker 2: defend yourself. Think of it as a problem you would

2184
01:48:36,760 --> 01:48:40,040
Speaker 2: like to solve together. And so by the time we

2185
01:48:40,080 --> 01:48:42,840
Speaker 2: got off the phone, it was like, okay, listen, let

2186
01:48:42,880 --> 01:48:45,240
Speaker 2: me tell you, like get all the stuff off your

2187
01:48:45,280 --> 01:48:47,400
Speaker 2: chest that you feel I'm not doing right or whatever.

2188
01:48:47,920 --> 01:48:50,200
Speaker 2: And then here's what I'm going to do to solve

2189
01:48:50,200 --> 01:48:55,120
Speaker 2: that because we're family. I love you. There's like, there's

2190
01:48:55,160 --> 01:48:57,160
Speaker 2: not another one of you on this planet. No one

2191
01:48:57,200 --> 01:48:59,479
Speaker 2: knows you like I fucking know you. There's no like

2192
01:49:01,080 --> 01:49:03,920
Speaker 2: we're gonna be each other's funeral. One of us is anyway,

2193
01:49:04,479 --> 01:49:07,240
Speaker 2: you know, we hopefully we don't we won't.

2194
01:49:06,960 --> 01:49:07,200
Speaker 4: Know to.

2195
01:49:10,080 --> 01:49:10,200
Speaker 3: Like.

2196
01:49:10,240 --> 01:49:14,000
Speaker 2: But it's this thing where it's like, listen, I could

2197
01:49:14,000 --> 01:49:18,240
Speaker 2: have been defensive and been like, but I felt this way,

2198
01:49:18,360 --> 01:49:21,000
Speaker 2: but instead I took it and said, here's some things

2199
01:49:21,040 --> 01:49:23,840
Speaker 2: I would like to do to fix this or to

2200
01:49:24,040 --> 01:49:26,960
Speaker 2: like make it different in the future. And so we

2201
01:49:27,040 --> 01:49:29,080
Speaker 2: just started doing that. It was like, Okay, I'm gonna

2202
01:49:29,120 --> 01:49:32,200
Speaker 2: come see you every month. We're gonna hang out. We're

2203
01:49:32,240 --> 01:49:34,200
Speaker 2: gonna gonna be a fucking thing if it we go

2204
01:49:34,280 --> 01:49:37,000
Speaker 2: to dinner, we're gonna whatever. Like I don't want you

2205
01:49:37,080 --> 01:49:41,760
Speaker 2: to ever feel abandoned or alone and whatnot. And I

2206
01:49:41,800 --> 01:49:45,720
Speaker 2: know my default is very much a hands off, Like,

2207
01:49:46,400 --> 01:49:49,639
Speaker 2: if you don't tell me you dislike me, I know, cool.

2208
01:49:49,680 --> 01:49:51,640
Speaker 2: If you don't tell me, if you love me the

2209
01:49:51,720 --> 01:49:54,479
Speaker 2: last time you saw me, y'all assume you love me forever,

2210
01:49:55,200 --> 01:49:58,320
Speaker 2: which is my you know, that's my mentality is it's

2211
01:49:58,360 --> 01:50:01,679
Speaker 2: not always correct, but still, yeah, that was That's my thing.

2212
01:50:01,760 --> 01:50:03,640
Speaker 2: So I think that was a big thing for me,

2213
01:50:04,040 --> 01:50:08,120
Speaker 2: was that comp like looking at that conflict not necessarily

2214
01:50:08,160 --> 01:50:08,879
Speaker 2: as a conflict.

2215
01:50:10,080 --> 01:50:11,320
Speaker 3: Can I I'll add to that.

2216
01:50:11,880 --> 01:50:12,040
Speaker 7: Uh.

2217
01:50:14,120 --> 01:50:17,000
Speaker 4: I learned this recently and I'm still constantly learning it.

2218
01:50:17,600 --> 01:50:19,880
Speaker 4: Uh that there's a guy, a friend of mine who's

2219
01:50:19,880 --> 01:50:22,640
Speaker 4: a comedian, a friend who I love, who's one of

2220
01:50:22,640 --> 01:50:26,080
Speaker 4: the people that I like, I like arguing with like

2221
01:50:26,160 --> 01:50:30,160
Speaker 4: sometimes like we generally agree about a lot of things, uh,

2222
01:50:30,560 --> 01:50:34,200
Speaker 4: but like he might be like slightly more like in.

2223
01:50:34,200 --> 01:50:37,080
Speaker 3: One direction and so and that will lead us.

2224
01:50:37,000 --> 01:50:41,599
Speaker 4: To like great philosophical debates and so like here's Mike, Mike.

2225
01:50:41,600 --> 01:50:43,920
Speaker 2: Hold on one second, we're gonna pick up right where

2226
01:50:43,960 --> 01:50:46,200
Speaker 2: Mike was cut off. Your friend.

2227
01:50:46,800 --> 01:50:51,000
Speaker 4: So, yeah, I got a buddy who we disagree about

2228
01:50:51,120 --> 01:50:56,240
Speaker 4: some things that lead to valuable uh sort of social political,

2229
01:50:56,280 --> 01:51:01,759
Speaker 4: philosophical discussions. And so recently he sent me two things

2230
01:51:01,760 --> 01:51:06,800
Speaker 4: that he thought were funny that I didn't agree exactly

2231
01:51:06,880 --> 01:51:09,200
Speaker 4: with the way that he thought they were funny, and

2232
01:51:09,439 --> 01:51:11,000
Speaker 4: but I handled them differently.

2233
01:51:11,520 --> 01:51:13,920
Speaker 3: And I can't say this is a.

2234
01:51:13,640 --> 01:51:17,920
Speaker 4: Completely controlled scientific experiment, but one way went great and

2235
01:51:17,960 --> 01:51:21,360
Speaker 4: the other way went a slightly different way. So the

2236
01:51:21,400 --> 01:51:24,439
Speaker 4: first one he said something he found something in an

2237
01:51:24,520 --> 01:51:31,040
Speaker 4: article a guy had said compared global warming, and he said,

2238
01:51:31,080 --> 01:51:34,880
Speaker 4: he called global warming like systemic racism in the sky,

2239
01:51:35,720 --> 01:51:39,479
Speaker 4: and like, it's like this big thing that's been going on,

2240
01:51:39,880 --> 01:51:43,759
Speaker 4: and it's also it's your fault, you know, And I get,

2241
01:51:44,439 --> 01:51:46,720
Speaker 4: I do get the humor, but I feel like the

2242
01:51:46,800 --> 01:51:50,000
Speaker 4: point of the point of talking about systemic racism and

2243
01:51:50,200 --> 01:51:53,200
Speaker 4: global warming, I think the analogy is a good one.

2244
01:51:53,320 --> 01:51:57,120
Speaker 4: And also it's good because we can individually net like

2245
01:51:57,200 --> 01:52:00,639
Speaker 4: we inherited both of them and we didn't cause them.

2246
01:52:00,640 --> 01:52:04,080
Speaker 4: It's not actually not our fault, but what we do

2247
01:52:04,200 --> 01:52:08,439
Speaker 4: next is our responsibility and we can work moving forward.

2248
01:52:08,600 --> 01:52:12,160
Speaker 3: So I came at that like, I don't think I

2249
01:52:12,760 --> 01:52:16,320
Speaker 3: agree with the point of the humor that you're talking.

2250
01:52:16,000 --> 01:52:19,680
Speaker 4: About there, even though it is I get it's a

2251
01:52:19,840 --> 01:52:22,519
Speaker 4: it's a clever thing, it's a perhaps it could even

2252
01:52:22,520 --> 01:52:25,519
Speaker 4: be a wise analogy, but I feel like then a

2253
01:52:25,560 --> 01:52:28,639
Speaker 4: misstep is made, either in the name of comedy or

2254
01:52:29,240 --> 01:52:32,640
Speaker 4: sort of disingenuously or ignorantly in the other direction. But

2255
01:52:32,800 --> 01:52:35,880
Speaker 4: the second time he shared with me, he's like, isn't

2256
01:52:35,920 --> 01:52:39,559
Speaker 4: this kind of amusing a headline that said, in the

2257
01:52:39,960 --> 01:52:43,920
Speaker 4: I believe Hispanic community, only three percent of people use

2258
01:52:44,000 --> 01:52:48,639
Speaker 4: the term latin X three and I think only twenty

2259
01:52:48,720 --> 01:52:52,439
Speaker 4: five percent, he said, are familiar with the term. And

2260
01:52:52,520 --> 01:52:55,720
Speaker 4: he said, isn't that amusing? And so I said, I

2261
01:52:55,760 --> 01:53:01,479
Speaker 4: hear you and also thinking about it more like it

2262
01:53:01,680 --> 01:53:03,960
Speaker 4: just off the top of my own head, Like if

2263
01:53:03,960 --> 01:53:06,920
Speaker 4: you are a person, let's say you're a person who

2264
01:53:06,960 --> 01:53:09,800
Speaker 4: identifies as male, you might be like, I'm Latino, if

2265
01:53:09,840 --> 01:53:12,720
Speaker 4: you're a person who identifies as female, or like I'm Latina.

2266
01:53:12,800 --> 01:53:16,280
Speaker 4: So if you're Latino or Latina, then you might use

2267
01:53:16,360 --> 01:53:20,680
Speaker 4: that term to identify yourself because you are You know

2268
01:53:20,800 --> 01:53:23,400
Speaker 4: your gender, and you know how you want to identify,

2269
01:53:23,400 --> 01:53:25,559
Speaker 4: and it's how you have identified for as long as

2270
01:53:25,560 --> 01:53:27,920
Speaker 4: you've been alive, perhaps, And if you are a non

2271
01:53:27,960 --> 01:53:31,919
Speaker 4: binary person or a gender other than male or female,

2272
01:53:32,080 --> 01:53:34,640
Speaker 4: then that percentage of people makes sense that.

2273
01:53:34,640 --> 01:53:35,759
Speaker 3: It would be very small.

2274
01:53:35,800 --> 01:53:39,640
Speaker 4: So a single digit percentage of people who specifically identify

2275
01:53:39,720 --> 01:53:44,280
Speaker 4: as LATINX makes sense. Along with that being what like I,

2276
01:53:44,479 --> 01:53:48,000
Speaker 4: as a white person, a non LATINX person, I might

2277
01:53:48,040 --> 01:53:50,519
Speaker 4: be like, oh, the LATINX community.

2278
01:53:50,320 --> 01:53:51,799
Speaker 3: Like, which is outside of myself.

2279
01:53:51,800 --> 01:53:55,240
Speaker 4: I'm referring to people of all genders in that way.

2280
01:53:55,439 --> 01:53:58,280
Speaker 4: So it makes sense that in that community they might

2281
01:53:58,320 --> 01:54:01,600
Speaker 4: not use that term as much as people outside of

2282
01:54:01,640 --> 01:54:05,080
Speaker 4: the community or the specific people in the community. And

2283
01:54:05,479 --> 01:54:07,160
Speaker 4: it seems it also reminds me of the way that

2284
01:54:07,160 --> 01:54:10,919
Speaker 4: people used to say like men when they meant humans.

2285
01:54:10,960 --> 01:54:13,280
Speaker 4: They're like, you know, all men are created equal, Like

2286
01:54:13,680 --> 01:54:14,880
Speaker 4: everybody said that.

2287
01:54:14,960 --> 01:54:16,360
Speaker 3: People still say that.

2288
01:54:16,600 --> 01:54:19,719
Speaker 4: Just because a majority of people said it or say

2289
01:54:19,760 --> 01:54:20,920
Speaker 4: it doesn't mean that.

2290
01:54:20,880 --> 01:54:21,719
Speaker 3: It's not sexist.

2291
01:54:21,800 --> 01:54:23,920
Speaker 4: Doesn't mean that we can come up with a better

2292
01:54:24,000 --> 01:54:26,439
Speaker 4: way of saying it. But so just the fact that

2293
01:54:26,640 --> 01:54:30,200
Speaker 4: the majority believes it doesn't mean it is the most

2294
01:54:30,520 --> 01:54:32,640
Speaker 4: true or worthy or valuable thing to say.

2295
01:54:32,680 --> 01:54:35,240
Speaker 3: We're all on a path moving forward, like whatever I

2296
01:54:35,280 --> 01:54:37,040
Speaker 3: said to that to that effect.

2297
01:54:37,160 --> 01:54:39,560
Speaker 4: My friend was like, that makes sense, and I was like,

2298
01:54:39,720 --> 01:54:44,320
Speaker 4: I do understand the humor appearing on the face of it, like, wow,

2299
01:54:44,440 --> 01:54:45,200
Speaker 4: can you believe it?

2300
01:54:45,360 --> 01:54:47,440
Speaker 3: Oh, I can believe it.

2301
01:54:47,560 --> 01:54:50,760
Speaker 4: I do believe it for these reasons, I honestly like

2302
01:54:50,840 --> 01:54:53,880
Speaker 4: in these two situations, the main difference was other than

2303
01:54:53,920 --> 01:54:58,600
Speaker 4: the individual circumstances, was I started by saying, I hear you, like,

2304
01:54:59,000 --> 01:55:03,600
Speaker 4: I really sa that opened him up to like to

2305
01:55:03,760 --> 01:55:06,120
Speaker 4: feeling herd. And that's the thing that, like when you

2306
01:55:06,160 --> 01:55:09,680
Speaker 4: were talking Rod about your family member, like you realize

2307
01:55:09,720 --> 01:55:12,240
Speaker 4: it's not an argument, it's not a competition, it's not

2308
01:55:12,400 --> 01:55:14,760
Speaker 4: something that you're you're trying to win.

2309
01:55:15,200 --> 01:55:17,040
Speaker 3: Like the the impulse to be.

2310
01:55:17,000 --> 01:55:20,400
Speaker 4: Defensive, of course, arises if they're if it seems like

2311
01:55:20,440 --> 01:55:22,960
Speaker 4: they're accusing you of something, if it seems like they're

2312
01:55:23,000 --> 01:55:26,960
Speaker 4: attacking you, if they're saying you did this when you.

2313
01:55:26,480 --> 01:55:28,120
Speaker 3: You believe that you didn't do that.

2314
01:55:28,440 --> 01:55:31,600
Speaker 4: Of course it makes sense to want to argue or

2315
01:55:31,640 --> 01:55:32,960
Speaker 4: come to your own defense.

2316
01:55:33,240 --> 01:55:34,880
Speaker 3: And even if you are going to do that, you

2317
01:55:34,920 --> 01:55:35,400
Speaker 3: can do that.

2318
01:55:35,440 --> 01:55:39,120
Speaker 4: It's not responsibility to just let someone define your experience.

2319
01:55:39,240 --> 01:55:42,040
Speaker 4: But saying like this is like you know from my

2320
01:55:42,120 --> 01:55:45,320
Speaker 4: Buddhist therapist friend Gus, like just the first thing to

2321
01:55:45,360 --> 01:55:48,200
Speaker 4: do to anyone, whether you agree with him or not,

2322
01:55:48,600 --> 01:55:51,280
Speaker 4: is perhaps to help them feel heard, to be like,

2323
01:55:51,400 --> 01:55:55,640
Speaker 4: I I hear what you're saying, I get why you're

2324
01:55:55,720 --> 01:55:58,440
Speaker 4: saying it, I understand how you're feeling.

2325
01:55:58,760 --> 01:56:02,760
Speaker 3: Like all without.

2326
01:56:01,280 --> 01:56:04,560
Speaker 4: All, without granting their premise in any way, just be

2327
01:56:04,640 --> 01:56:07,160
Speaker 4: like I hear where you're at, and.

2328
01:56:07,040 --> 01:56:08,920
Speaker 3: Then there's where I am.

2329
01:56:09,040 --> 01:56:13,160
Speaker 2: The thing for me was like, in addition to hearing them,

2330
01:56:13,200 --> 01:56:15,440
Speaker 2: I kept thinking of, like, what would I want them

2331
01:56:15,520 --> 01:56:18,400
Speaker 2: ultimately to come out of this conversation with And I

2332
01:56:18,440 --> 01:56:20,680
Speaker 2: thought to know that I love them, to know that

2333
01:56:20,720 --> 01:56:23,800
Speaker 2: I that that I'm in your corner. That like that

2334
01:56:24,000 --> 01:56:28,080
Speaker 2: supersedes the ego for me in the moment of But

2335
01:56:28,080 --> 01:56:30,720
Speaker 2: but but this is how I feel, like, you know,

2336
01:56:31,280 --> 01:56:34,440
Speaker 2: for that Like and it's not that they were necessarily

2337
01:56:34,480 --> 01:56:37,520
Speaker 2: wrong or right about that, it's just, oh, this may

2338
01:56:37,560 --> 01:56:40,400
Speaker 2: be I can see how this would appear to someone else,

2339
01:56:40,400 --> 01:56:45,200
Speaker 2: So I can see how the insecurity, the same insecurities

2340
01:56:45,240 --> 01:56:48,360
Speaker 2: I have that filling gaps are feeling in yours, you

2341
01:56:48,400 --> 01:56:50,520
Speaker 2: know what I mean. And so that was a big

2342
01:56:50,600 --> 01:56:53,720
Speaker 2: that was a big thing for me. But but also

2343
01:56:53,920 --> 01:56:56,560
Speaker 2: I realized that at that time, like I've been doing

2344
01:56:56,600 --> 01:57:01,280
Speaker 2: that my whole life. It really wasn't until the Internet

2345
01:57:01,320 --> 01:57:06,920
Speaker 2: and social media that I stopped getting the reinforcement that

2346
01:57:06,920 --> 01:57:09,879
Speaker 2: that was a positive quality, you see what I'm saying, Like,

2347
01:57:09,880 --> 01:57:11,400
Speaker 2: like when I was a kid, I was that way,

2348
01:57:11,520 --> 01:57:14,480
Speaker 2: you know, when I was like with all my friendships

2349
01:57:14,560 --> 01:57:17,440
Speaker 2: in just my life, I don't have any friend like

2350
01:57:18,080 --> 01:57:21,040
Speaker 2: a big foundation of my friendships is how we resolve conflict.

2351
01:57:21,160 --> 01:57:24,480
Speaker 2: Like I for me personally, I really don't count people

2352
01:57:24,480 --> 01:57:26,800
Speaker 2: as friends unless we resolve the conflict at some point,

2353
01:57:26,840 --> 01:57:27,440
Speaker 2: because you.

2354
01:57:27,440 --> 01:57:29,560
Speaker 6: Really don't know, like convict resolution is.

2355
01:57:29,560 --> 01:57:32,800
Speaker 2: A big part of friendship, so it's easier to call

2356
01:57:32,840 --> 01:57:35,280
Speaker 2: yourself a friend. It's like, we've never disagreed on anything.

2357
01:57:35,800 --> 01:57:39,120
Speaker 2: Everything we agree, you know what, We're friends now, Mike,

2358
01:57:39,200 --> 01:57:39,600
Speaker 2: that's it.

2359
01:57:40,200 --> 01:57:43,240
Speaker 3: Oh yeah, you're right. I was wrong to stay disagree.

2360
01:57:46,040 --> 01:57:48,000
Speaker 2: So yeah, that was That was the thing I had

2361
01:57:48,080 --> 01:57:51,000
Speaker 2: to realize though, is like that's not a bad thing

2362
01:57:51,200 --> 01:57:53,960
Speaker 2: I think, and that I do think. That's a function

2363
01:57:54,000 --> 01:57:56,720
Speaker 2: of the internet is because if you look at how

2364
01:57:56,720 --> 01:58:00,040
Speaker 2: it teaches our brain, it's like you're more of a

2365
01:58:00,120 --> 01:58:03,600
Speaker 2: in the more things you agree on and have in common.

2366
01:58:04,320 --> 01:58:08,120
Speaker 2: That's a quote unquote friend. You know on Twitter, that's

2367
01:58:08,120 --> 01:58:10,600
Speaker 2: a follower or whatever, Like I agree with everything the

2368
01:58:10,640 --> 01:58:13,240
Speaker 2: guy says here, I follow him now, which is that

2369
01:58:13,280 --> 01:58:16,800
Speaker 2: doesn't make any sense, or you know, I agree with

2370
01:58:16,840 --> 01:58:19,640
Speaker 2: what you say. You're my friend now. And then when

2371
01:58:19,640 --> 01:58:22,720
Speaker 2: you log in the fucking things only shows you the

2372
01:58:22,760 --> 01:58:24,760
Speaker 2: people that agree with you all the time. And I'm like,

2373
01:58:25,040 --> 01:58:27,840
Speaker 2: that just wasn't my reality growing up. We may be

2374
01:58:28,000 --> 01:58:32,040
Speaker 2: the last people, the last generation that that's not our

2375
01:58:32,080 --> 01:58:33,960
Speaker 2: reality growing up, you know what I mean, from this

2376
01:58:34,040 --> 01:58:38,480
Speaker 2: point on, unless something really big changes with social media.

2377
01:58:39,360 --> 01:58:43,560
Speaker 2: This may be it for people who had more time

2378
01:58:45,000 --> 01:58:48,720
Speaker 2: informative years to be like, Hey, me and my friend

2379
01:58:48,720 --> 01:58:51,040
Speaker 2: didn't agree on this thing, but we stay friends because

2380
01:58:51,040 --> 01:58:54,000
Speaker 2: we're friends. I have friends. I fist fought when I

2381
01:58:54,040 --> 01:58:57,720
Speaker 2: was in uh, when I was in back in elementary

2382
01:58:57,760 --> 01:59:01,960
Speaker 2: and high school and stuff, but we stay We stayed friends, yes,

2383
01:59:02,240 --> 01:59:04,600
Speaker 2: because because it just wasn't it was like that was

2384
01:59:04,600 --> 01:59:06,800
Speaker 2: the theme, not just and I'm not saying these are

2385
01:59:06,800 --> 01:59:12,400
Speaker 2: good things, but but that was a thing that commonly happened,

2386
01:59:12,480 --> 01:59:14,680
Speaker 2: was like, oh, we played basketball and then we got

2387
01:59:14,680 --> 01:59:16,880
Speaker 2: in a fist fight, and then like the next day,

2388
01:59:17,320 --> 01:59:19,120
Speaker 2: you know, it's like we showed up to the bus

2389
01:59:19,120 --> 01:59:22,880
Speaker 2: stop and we talked about transformers or whatever the fuck.

2390
01:59:22,920 --> 01:59:26,720
Speaker 2: Because that's just it just wasn't seen as like the

2391
01:59:26,840 --> 01:59:28,440
Speaker 2: end of you, you know what I mean. And I

2392
01:59:28,480 --> 01:59:31,120
Speaker 2: think that may have changed a little bit better.

2393
01:59:31,240 --> 01:59:33,360
Speaker 4: Better if you have to have a fist fight with someone,

2394
01:59:33,480 --> 01:59:35,320
Speaker 4: better to have a bee with a friend in the

2395
01:59:35,400 --> 01:59:41,160
Speaker 4: past than an enemy in the present or the future.

2396
01:59:41,200 --> 01:59:45,640
Speaker 4: To hold a grudge against for your life. Here's something

2397
01:59:45,680 --> 01:59:48,760
Speaker 4: I was thinking about earlier that's sort of relevant to uh,

2398
01:59:49,400 --> 01:59:52,920
Speaker 4: the idea of muting, muting people that you know that

2399
01:59:53,200 --> 01:59:55,879
Speaker 4: you don't want to hear about, you know, like naturally

2400
01:59:56,000 --> 02:00:00,680
Speaker 4: organically like gravitating towards and have it hoping that people

2401
02:00:00,720 --> 02:00:04,200
Speaker 4: gravitate towards you when they are you know, like minded

2402
02:00:04,280 --> 02:00:08,400
Speaker 4: in the ways of communications and conflict resolution, and you know,

2403
02:00:09,160 --> 02:00:12,080
Speaker 4: compassion forgiveness like warmth, like you know, the things that

2404
02:00:12,160 --> 02:00:15,120
Speaker 4: you want, the values that you want to share in

2405
02:00:15,160 --> 02:00:18,240
Speaker 4: your friendships and relationships. Something that I think I came

2406
02:00:18,320 --> 02:00:19,320
Speaker 4: up I came up with this idea a.

2407
02:00:19,320 --> 02:00:19,960
Speaker 3: Few years ago.

2408
02:00:20,040 --> 02:00:23,280
Speaker 4: I haven't done it much, but uh, sometimes like when

2409
02:00:23,440 --> 02:00:26,440
Speaker 4: a celebrity dies or when somebody dies that you know,

2410
02:00:26,440 --> 02:00:28,280
Speaker 4: you hear about, like a lot of people will make

2411
02:00:28,360 --> 02:00:30,640
Speaker 4: jokes about it, like negative you know, like it's just

2412
02:00:30,760 --> 02:00:33,160
Speaker 4: a natural response on Twitter, like this person died.

2413
02:00:33,200 --> 02:00:35,080
Speaker 3: There's a joke, a negative fact.

2414
02:00:35,160 --> 02:00:37,640
Speaker 4: There's like things, there's just jokes all the time. And

2415
02:00:37,680 --> 02:00:40,280
Speaker 4: I was thinking about, like that's not my favorite, Like

2416
02:00:40,400 --> 02:00:42,560
Speaker 4: I now understand like I might have done it in

2417
02:00:42,600 --> 02:00:42,880
Speaker 4: the past.

2418
02:00:42,920 --> 02:00:43,640
Speaker 3: I'm sure that I did.

2419
02:00:43,800 --> 02:00:46,440
Speaker 2: I have done it I will, I have done it,

2420
02:00:47,440 --> 02:00:52,560
Speaker 2: and I remember. I remember there were two times specifically.

2421
02:00:53,160 --> 02:00:55,840
Speaker 2: One was when Paul Walker died because I just thought

2422
02:00:55,840 --> 02:00:59,600
Speaker 2: it was funny, which was really fucked up, but but

2423
02:00:59,640 --> 02:01:02,160
Speaker 2: I remember, and then people were like, oh, this is terrible,

2424
02:01:02,160 --> 02:01:05,800
Speaker 2: when I thought, oh, you know whatever, it's just this

2425
02:01:06,000 --> 02:01:08,320
Speaker 2: person or what like, it was just completely callous. And

2426
02:01:08,360 --> 02:01:11,200
Speaker 2: then the other time I did it, though, I felt

2427
02:01:11,240 --> 02:01:14,400
Speaker 2: the opposite, which is when Joan Rivers died, because I said,

2428
02:01:14,480 --> 02:01:17,480
Speaker 2: this is a tribute. Joan would do this, Okay, this

2429
02:01:17,560 --> 02:01:21,560
Speaker 2: is her thing, like for her, yeah, for her. I

2430
02:01:21,640 --> 02:01:24,400
Speaker 2: was like, this is there. I'm like, you know, I'm

2431
02:01:24,480 --> 02:01:27,840
Speaker 2: just like Joan Rivers dies the age of this age,

2432
02:01:27,960 --> 02:01:30,920
Speaker 2: but most of her body was you know, fifteen years old,

2433
02:01:31,200 --> 02:01:33,640
Speaker 2: you know, stuff, just stuff she would say, because I

2434
02:01:33,720 --> 02:01:36,120
Speaker 2: just fucking loved her so much at you know, as

2435
02:01:36,160 --> 02:01:37,840
Speaker 2: you can as celebrity. You know, you don't love it,

2436
02:01:37,880 --> 02:01:40,600
Speaker 2: but like I enjoy comedy and stuff so much, so

2437
02:01:40,720 --> 02:01:43,760
Speaker 2: like I like, but you're right, but I haven't done

2438
02:01:43,800 --> 02:01:46,440
Speaker 2: that kind of thing since, even when like people that

2439
02:01:46,480 --> 02:01:49,800
Speaker 2: I really did think put a lot of misery on

2440
02:01:49,840 --> 02:01:53,760
Speaker 2: the earth died, like when Justice Scalia died and stuff,

2441
02:01:53,840 --> 02:01:56,080
Speaker 2: like I didn't. You know, if it was been a

2442
02:01:56,080 --> 02:01:58,200
Speaker 2: few years ago, I probably would have been more like,

2443
02:01:58,560 --> 02:02:00,280
Speaker 2: you know, fuck him and here's some joke. But I

2444
02:02:00,440 --> 02:02:03,280
Speaker 2: just really was like, I don't know, it's just all

2445
02:02:03,320 --> 02:02:05,560
Speaker 2: this kind of it's all kind of sad, and I mean,

2446
02:02:05,560 --> 02:02:08,200
Speaker 2: I guess it's better for the things I believe in

2447
02:02:08,280 --> 02:02:10,760
Speaker 2: that he's no longer making these decisions.

2448
02:02:10,840 --> 02:02:14,760
Speaker 4: But you know, still say, that's really helped me because

2449
02:02:14,800 --> 02:02:17,920
Speaker 4: you you now, really helped me lock in on what

2450
02:02:18,000 --> 02:02:22,160
Speaker 4: the thing was that I was bringing up because like

2451
02:02:22,200 --> 02:02:25,600
Speaker 4: I also like Mike di Stefano was a comedian and

2452
02:02:25,760 --> 02:02:27,760
Speaker 4: friend of mine that I knew, like in the last

2453
02:02:27,840 --> 02:02:29,560
Speaker 4: year of his life when we did last time extending

2454
02:02:29,560 --> 02:02:32,440
Speaker 4: together and toured together. And I have a joke about

2455
02:02:32,600 --> 02:02:34,960
Speaker 4: his death that I that I.

2456
02:02:34,840 --> 02:02:37,160
Speaker 3: Think he would love. I would love for him to

2457
02:02:37,200 --> 02:02:37,520
Speaker 3: hear it.

2458
02:02:37,600 --> 02:02:40,760
Speaker 4: I would love I hope he's a ghost and here's it.

2459
02:02:40,800 --> 02:02:44,240
Speaker 4: Every time I do it, I hope he would. He

2460
02:02:44,280 --> 02:02:47,640
Speaker 4: would make jokes so much quote unquote worse than this.

2461
02:02:47,920 --> 02:02:48,120
Speaker 3: Right.

2462
02:02:49,640 --> 02:02:52,320
Speaker 4: The thing that I really that I remember now, the

2463
02:02:52,360 --> 02:02:55,440
Speaker 4: concept that I came up with is when somebody dies

2464
02:02:55,680 --> 02:02:58,800
Speaker 4: who you didn't like, who was maybe bringing you know,

2465
02:02:59,320 --> 02:03:03,560
Speaker 4: not helping who was like leading, you know, adding to

2466
02:03:04,480 --> 02:03:10,960
Speaker 4: laws and structures that did keep marginalized people oppressed and suffering.

2467
02:03:11,440 --> 02:03:13,640
Speaker 3: And that not that you want to be.

2468
02:03:13,760 --> 02:03:17,120
Speaker 4: You don't want to like celebrate in I mean some

2469
02:03:17,160 --> 02:03:19,720
Speaker 4: people you might, you might want to celebrate someone's death,

2470
02:03:19,800 --> 02:03:24,520
Speaker 4: but in doing that in they are dead. And now

2471
02:03:24,600 --> 02:03:28,360
Speaker 4: if the more you engage with them, the more they

2472
02:03:28,440 --> 02:03:30,920
Speaker 4: are in you, the more even if you're if you're

2473
02:03:31,000 --> 02:03:35,080
Speaker 4: being hateful or funny about them in appointed in a

2474
02:03:35,280 --> 02:03:36,600
Speaker 4: in a roasty way.

2475
02:03:36,400 --> 02:03:37,280
Speaker 3: Like you can't.

2476
02:03:37,320 --> 02:03:39,480
Speaker 4: You can't a one hundred percent you can, like I

2477
02:03:39,600 --> 02:03:41,640
Speaker 4: prefer not to for myself.

2478
02:03:41,760 --> 02:03:43,720
Speaker 3: And the thing that I have offered that I'll offer

2479
02:03:43,760 --> 02:03:44,480
Speaker 3: you in.

2480
02:03:44,520 --> 02:03:48,920
Speaker 4: Exchange is whenever someone that isn't beloved to you dies

2481
02:03:49,040 --> 02:03:52,400
Speaker 4: in this way, like why not instead of posting about them,

2482
02:03:52,640 --> 02:03:55,680
Speaker 4: post about someone beloved to you who has passed away,

2483
02:03:55,920 --> 02:03:59,280
Speaker 4: share a memory like the next time, the next time

2484
02:03:59,680 --> 02:04:04,040
Speaker 4: a conservative justice on the Supreme Court dies, post a

2485
02:04:04,160 --> 02:04:06,440
Speaker 4: memory about Ruth Bader Ginsburg.

2486
02:04:07,040 --> 02:04:09,520
Speaker 3: Whenever your least favorite person.

2487
02:04:09,280 --> 02:04:13,200
Speaker 4: Dies, post always about Ruth Bader Ginsburg, just like RBG

2488
02:04:13,760 --> 02:04:18,120
Speaker 4: tweets and posts forever like keep bringing keep their memory

2489
02:04:18,480 --> 02:04:21,960
Speaker 4: as alive as possible, instead of keeping and not to

2490
02:04:22,000 --> 02:04:25,360
Speaker 4: say forget about the person, then forget about the harms,

2491
02:04:25,360 --> 02:04:29,760
Speaker 4: but obviously fight for positive change and peace and justice

2492
02:04:29,800 --> 02:04:33,040
Speaker 4: and compassion and kindness as much as possible. But why

2493
02:04:33,080 --> 02:04:36,160
Speaker 4: not big up instead of big doubting?

2494
02:04:36,440 --> 02:04:40,400
Speaker 2: Yeah, I think the violence, Like I feel like violence

2495
02:04:40,480 --> 02:04:43,720
Speaker 2: leaves a stain on both people, you know what I mean,

2496
02:04:43,800 --> 02:04:45,920
Speaker 2: Like the person is inflicted upon and the person that

2497
02:04:46,080 --> 02:04:49,320
Speaker 2: does it. But as a country that's kind of in

2498
02:04:49,360 --> 02:04:51,920
Speaker 2: love with violence, it's like we just go no, the

2499
02:04:51,920 --> 02:04:55,120
Speaker 2: person pulling the trigger, They're fine. I'm like, I don't know, man,

2500
02:04:55,160 --> 02:05:00,680
Speaker 2: PTSD is a thing like survivor's guil, Like there's a

2501
02:05:00,680 --> 02:05:05,080
Speaker 2: ton of shit evidence that we have that even justifiable

2502
02:05:05,520 --> 02:05:08,800
Speaker 2: like revenge, and all the shit is still bothers you.

2503
02:05:08,800 --> 02:05:11,400
Speaker 2: You know, it's still leaves a stain in you. And uh,

2504
02:05:11,440 --> 02:05:13,560
Speaker 2: I think, but we're so obsessed with like right and

2505
02:05:13,600 --> 02:05:16,600
Speaker 2: wrong that it's like but if you were right, then

2506
02:05:16,600 --> 02:05:19,280
Speaker 2: it then it then it leaves no stain. Like no,

2507
02:05:19,360 --> 02:05:21,000
Speaker 2: even when you're right, even if.

2508
02:05:20,840 --> 02:05:27,360
Speaker 4: You could rather people feel better and healthier than right.

2509
02:05:27,600 --> 02:05:30,839
Speaker 4: And this is you know, redement of myself as well.

2510
02:05:31,160 --> 02:05:34,480
Speaker 4: And I want to also offer like the first two

2511
02:05:34,520 --> 02:05:38,520
Speaker 4: things one I read uh an article about a woman

2512
02:05:38,560 --> 02:05:41,839
Speaker 4: who was her mission was to eliminate the death penalty,

2513
02:05:42,120 --> 02:05:45,160
Speaker 4: and one of the things that she talked about was

2514
02:05:45,200 --> 02:05:48,480
Speaker 4: that when she talked with families of people who had

2515
02:05:48,520 --> 02:05:52,400
Speaker 4: been killed, like so many of them don't want the

2516
02:05:52,480 --> 02:05:58,320
Speaker 4: death penalty for the rare for for the murderer because

2517
02:05:58,760 --> 02:06:02,400
Speaker 4: they know that the family of the murderer who didn't

2518
02:06:03,360 --> 02:06:06,640
Speaker 4: commit any who didn't necessarily who knows what they did,

2519
02:06:06,720 --> 02:06:09,040
Speaker 4: Like we're all a part part of all these systems,

2520
02:06:09,040 --> 02:06:13,160
Speaker 4: but they didn't kill anyone, and they're a family that

2521
02:06:13,240 --> 02:06:16,480
Speaker 4: will feel the same loss. They don't want anyone to

2522
02:06:16,480 --> 02:06:20,320
Speaker 4: feel the loss that they're feeling because what they're feeling

2523
02:06:20,360 --> 02:06:24,000
Speaker 4: is so intensely said, they would rather like not even

2524
02:06:24,000 --> 02:06:27,400
Speaker 4: speaking about forgiving. But like it doesn't help them, right,

2525
02:06:27,600 --> 02:06:31,000
Speaker 4: it doesn't bring the person back. We people might think

2526
02:06:31,120 --> 02:06:33,720
Speaker 4: that it'll help them, like you know, somebody hurts you,

2527
02:06:33,920 --> 02:06:36,600
Speaker 4: so you want to hurt them because because you're hurt.

2528
02:06:36,400 --> 02:06:37,560
Speaker 3: You want to do something.

2529
02:06:37,840 --> 02:06:40,640
Speaker 4: But wouldn't it be better to want there to be

2530
02:06:41,080 --> 02:06:43,880
Speaker 4: less hurt and it overall that.

2531
02:06:43,920 --> 02:06:46,840
Speaker 2: Kind of I think also the anger for the general

2532
02:06:46,960 --> 02:06:50,480
Speaker 2: public feels like control. Yes, that illusion, so then we're

2533
02:06:50,560 --> 02:06:53,280
Speaker 2: like we are avenging the thing that happened in the

2534
02:06:53,360 --> 02:06:57,480
Speaker 2: past and preventing it from happening again by taking this

2535
02:06:57,560 --> 02:07:01,040
Speaker 2: person out. That's the that's the idea behind it, and

2536
02:07:01,080 --> 02:07:04,520
Speaker 2: of course the bigger and scaring people who would do it,

2537
02:07:05,280 --> 02:07:07,400
Speaker 2: who would look at this and go, well, I'm I

2538
02:07:07,520 --> 02:07:10,720
Speaker 2: normally do kill people, but now that I know other

2539
02:07:10,800 --> 02:07:14,040
Speaker 2: people kill people for killing people, now I'm gonna not.

2540
02:07:14,440 --> 02:07:17,960
Speaker 2: We know that's not true statistically, but that's the idea

2541
02:07:18,040 --> 02:07:20,240
Speaker 2: behind it, you know what I mean. And so I

2542
02:07:20,280 --> 02:07:23,440
Speaker 2: think one of the things we're not truly familiar with

2543
02:07:23,640 --> 02:07:27,600
Speaker 2: is when you get into the like details, when you

2544
02:07:27,680 --> 02:07:30,600
Speaker 2: go talk to the individuals involved, a lot of times,

2545
02:07:30,640 --> 02:07:34,000
Speaker 2: like they have time to process it, especially if you're

2546
02:07:34,000 --> 02:07:37,400
Speaker 2: talking about death penalty cases. Sometimes it takes ten years

2547
02:07:37,440 --> 02:07:40,800
Speaker 2: for those people to die. So when you talk to

2548
02:07:40,880 --> 02:07:43,440
Speaker 2: the people who have been wronged or their loved ones

2549
02:07:43,480 --> 02:07:46,120
Speaker 2: taken a lot of times, they've had time to deal

2550
02:07:46,200 --> 02:07:48,800
Speaker 2: with this in a way that we, as in black

2551
02:07:48,840 --> 02:07:52,080
Speaker 2: and white you know, right or wrong audience, have not.

2552
02:07:52,720 --> 02:07:55,200
Speaker 2: And so when we see the full result of that,

2553
02:07:55,720 --> 02:07:57,640
Speaker 2: it doesn't match to what we would think it would

2554
02:07:57,640 --> 02:07:59,760
Speaker 2: match to, not saying all the time, of course, there

2555
02:07:59,760 --> 02:08:02,160
Speaker 2: are some people that are like I kept that same energy,

2556
02:08:02,280 --> 02:08:04,880
Speaker 2: Like I've been waiting ten years for the watch this

2557
02:08:04,920 --> 02:08:07,640
Speaker 2: person die, and I'm gonna watch them. But in a

2558
02:08:07,720 --> 02:08:10,160
Speaker 2: lot of cases, like more than you would think is

2559
02:08:10,200 --> 02:08:13,600
Speaker 2: people going that's not gonna make me feel better, is

2560
02:08:13,640 --> 02:08:16,680
Speaker 2: not bringing my loved one back. And I've found a

2561
02:08:16,760 --> 02:08:20,480
Speaker 2: different way to deal with it mentally than than simply

2562
02:08:20,960 --> 02:08:21,720
Speaker 2: getting revenge.

2563
02:08:22,920 --> 02:08:24,560
Speaker 4: Can I can I read something to you from the

2564
02:08:24,560 --> 02:08:25,640
Speaker 4: book I'm reading right now.

2565
02:08:25,560 --> 02:08:27,640
Speaker 3: Which is by Ursula k Legwin.

2566
02:08:28,040 --> 02:08:31,760
Speaker 4: It's called Always Coming Home, And it's like it's fiction,

2567
02:08:32,040 --> 02:08:37,400
Speaker 4: but it's like this expansive anthropological delving into the fictional

2568
02:08:37,520 --> 02:08:41,880
Speaker 4: society of these native people in the future that let's

2569
02:08:41,880 --> 02:08:44,760
Speaker 4: sort of live like indigenous people. But it's also it's

2570
02:08:44,800 --> 02:08:47,840
Speaker 4: like our world but the future, and some some shit

2571
02:08:47,880 --> 02:08:52,360
Speaker 4: has happened. But so there's a discussion of hunting and

2572
02:08:52,440 --> 02:08:56,520
Speaker 4: they say, uh, the game animals were the link between

2573
02:08:56,600 --> 02:09:00,160
Speaker 4: the wilderness and the human soul, and the hunter just

2574
02:09:00,240 --> 02:09:03,040
Speaker 4: in that he was somewhat less than fully human, was

2575
02:09:03,400 --> 02:09:07,480
Speaker 4: with the animal he killed, both accomplice and sacrifice in

2576
02:09:07,520 --> 02:09:10,920
Speaker 4: a truly mysterious act. The meaning of the sacred as

2577
02:09:10,960 --> 02:09:14,800
Speaker 4: the dangerous, the holiest transgression was implicit in their animal

2578
02:09:14,920 --> 02:09:15,600
Speaker 4: dancing and in.

2579
02:09:15,560 --> 02:09:17,200
Speaker 3: The Hunter's songs. It's just the.

2580
02:09:17,200 --> 02:09:20,640
Speaker 4: Idea that you know, even killing an animal in their

2581
02:09:20,680 --> 02:09:25,360
Speaker 4: society is a sacrifice for the animal and for the

2582
02:09:25,400 --> 02:09:27,240
Speaker 4: person doing.

2583
02:09:26,880 --> 02:09:29,560
Speaker 3: The killing, like to take a life.

2584
02:09:29,600 --> 02:09:32,600
Speaker 4: It's not we have the idea, I mean, because of media,

2585
02:09:32,640 --> 02:09:36,000
Speaker 4: because of our everything, the way that our society is structured,

2586
02:09:37,160 --> 02:09:40,360
Speaker 4: we think that there is a such thing as a

2587
02:09:40,440 --> 02:09:42,880
Speaker 4: good guy with a gun. And it doesn't mean that

2588
02:09:42,920 --> 02:09:45,640
Speaker 4: there's that we can't understand with them. He's like, yes,

2589
02:09:45,680 --> 02:09:50,640
Speaker 4: of course, if there's somebody shooting everybody, like, it's understandable

2590
02:09:50,960 --> 02:09:54,360
Speaker 4: to want somebody to want that to stop, to want

2591
02:09:54,360 --> 02:09:56,520
Speaker 4: that to not happen, to want that to not be happening.

2592
02:09:57,080 --> 02:10:01,480
Speaker 4: And also though it's like violence, he gets violence, you know, killing,

2593
02:10:01,480 --> 02:10:04,280
Speaker 4: he gets killing, shooting, And so it feels so much

2594
02:10:04,320 --> 02:10:07,800
Speaker 4: it feels valuable to at least also like bring the

2595
02:10:07,840 --> 02:10:12,280
Speaker 4: discussion to like not not ignore those things, but be like,

2596
02:10:12,320 --> 02:10:14,520
Speaker 4: you know, when people talk about defunding the police.

2597
02:10:14,280 --> 02:10:17,040
Speaker 3: But what are you going to what will well, then.

2598
02:10:16,960 --> 02:10:19,760
Speaker 4: Also take that money and fund schools, and fund mental

2599
02:10:19,840 --> 02:10:23,480
Speaker 4: health programs and fund all of the help get rid

2600
02:10:23,520 --> 02:10:27,360
Speaker 4: of the seeds. That grow into crime, which is the

2601
02:10:27,520 --> 02:10:32,440
Speaker 4: need for police. Not just eliminate the police, defund defund

2602
02:10:32,520 --> 02:10:36,720
Speaker 4: the need or the police, because it's not like they

2603
02:10:36,760 --> 02:10:39,560
Speaker 4: protect us. If there was something, if we didn't need protection,

2604
02:10:39,840 --> 02:10:41,760
Speaker 4: then we wouldn't need protecting.

2605
02:10:42,400 --> 02:10:46,040
Speaker 2: And because we now we defund the schools all the

2606
02:10:46,080 --> 02:10:49,080
Speaker 2: goddamn times, Yes we do, you know, we literally there

2607
02:10:49,200 --> 02:10:51,440
Speaker 2: there's been studies that prove what you do not put

2608
02:10:51,480 --> 02:10:53,920
Speaker 2: into schools, you put into prisons. Yes, like you don't

2609
02:10:53,960 --> 02:10:56,560
Speaker 2: have a choice. It's like the people go somewhere. So

2610
02:10:56,640 --> 02:10:59,280
Speaker 2: if you don't, it's like, we're not gonna educate you. Well,

2611
02:10:59,280 --> 02:11:02,040
Speaker 2: then you'll be paid for my stay as a criminal

2612
02:11:02,080 --> 02:11:04,320
Speaker 2: at the criminal hotel, because that's what the fuck is

2613
02:11:04,320 --> 02:11:05,040
Speaker 2: gonna happen.

2614
02:11:04,880 --> 02:11:07,360
Speaker 3: Now, you know, I think it's harmon hotel.

2615
02:11:07,760 --> 02:11:10,000
Speaker 2: It had it's hard for people to it's hard for

2616
02:11:10,080 --> 02:11:12,440
Speaker 2: people to perceive it that way. It's still your tax money.

2617
02:11:12,600 --> 02:11:14,360
Speaker 2: So then it's like, what would you rather your tax

2618
02:11:14,400 --> 02:11:17,160
Speaker 2: money do? Would you rather it be used penalized as

2619
02:11:17,200 --> 02:11:22,320
Speaker 2: someone or helping someone to to to be educated informed, uh,

2620
02:11:22,360 --> 02:11:24,760
Speaker 2: and become a productive citizen in that way? And I

2621
02:11:24,800 --> 02:11:27,240
Speaker 2: think it's hard for people to let go of the

2622
02:11:27,280 --> 02:11:30,040
Speaker 2: impost to punish, which is why you have a lot

2623
02:11:30,080 --> 02:11:33,000
Speaker 2: of people who really, without thinking about it, go no, no, no,

2624
02:11:33,040 --> 02:11:34,360
Speaker 2: spend the money on the prisons.

2625
02:11:35,040 --> 02:11:39,160
Speaker 4: Because also, like if let's say we invest more heavily

2626
02:11:39,360 --> 02:11:43,600
Speaker 4: in communities, in education, in these other resources, like you're

2627
02:11:43,640 --> 02:11:45,160
Speaker 4: not going to see I mean, you can see in

2628
02:11:45,200 --> 02:11:47,640
Speaker 4: the numbers overall, but you can never be like, hey,

2629
02:11:47,680 --> 02:11:49,920
Speaker 4: this is a person who would have gone to prison,

2630
02:11:50,240 --> 02:11:51,839
Speaker 4: but they're not like there's.

2631
02:11:51,640 --> 02:11:53,360
Speaker 3: No individual way to point it out.

2632
02:11:53,360 --> 02:11:56,960
Speaker 4: But you can individually punish a person for doing a thing.

2633
02:11:57,160 --> 02:11:59,720
Speaker 4: But it's sort of like like preventive medicine, Like they're

2634
02:12:00,280 --> 02:12:03,720
Speaker 4: be statistics about like if everyone could get a physical

2635
02:12:03,800 --> 02:12:08,000
Speaker 4: every year, if they could afford that, then the emergency

2636
02:12:08,120 --> 02:12:12,040
Speaker 4: rooms wouldn't be Then the the fund the funds needed

2637
02:12:12,040 --> 02:12:15,040
Speaker 4: to fund. Like what if if people only go into

2638
02:12:15,080 --> 02:12:18,360
Speaker 4: emergency it costs more than if they went every year

2639
02:12:18,400 --> 02:12:22,320
Speaker 4: for preventative care. So the same like education is preventative

2640
02:12:22,400 --> 02:12:26,560
Speaker 4: care for the criminal justice system. It's legitimately it would

2641
02:12:26,600 --> 02:12:30,080
Speaker 4: pre empt the need for as many police and prisons.

2642
02:12:30,160 --> 02:12:32,800
Speaker 3: And people are like, oh, they imagine the worst in

2643
02:12:32,840 --> 02:12:33,320
Speaker 3: the future.

2644
02:12:33,440 --> 02:12:36,120
Speaker 4: They're like, but what is it What if these bad

2645
02:12:36,160 --> 02:12:38,320
Speaker 4: things would happen, be like, but have you looked at

2646
02:12:38,440 --> 02:12:40,400
Speaker 4: what things are happening now?

2647
02:12:40,560 --> 02:12:43,000
Speaker 2: I think I think it's like, uh, people saw the

2648
02:12:43,040 --> 02:12:47,200
Speaker 2: movie Demolition Man, and they think that's that's what they think.

2649
02:12:47,280 --> 02:12:49,920
Speaker 2: Defund the police is gonna look like is this like,

2650
02:12:50,600 --> 02:12:52,960
Speaker 2: but the thing, the thing everyone skips over in demolition

2651
02:12:53,120 --> 02:12:54,760
Speaker 2: Land is a demolition man.

2652
02:12:55,080 --> 02:12:57,520
Speaker 6: Everything was fine until Simon Phoenix showed.

2653
02:12:57,280 --> 02:13:00,800
Speaker 2: Up, like they were doing pretty fucking good, Like it

2654
02:13:00,960 --> 02:13:03,720
Speaker 2: was like, no crime, We're even like it was punitive.

2655
02:13:03,760 --> 02:13:06,520
Speaker 6: Okay, they were giving people fines for cursing and stuff.

2656
02:13:06,400 --> 02:13:08,680
Speaker 2: But but in general though, it was like this world

2657
02:13:08,720 --> 02:13:12,040
Speaker 2: whereas like crime was a crime was a foreign concept

2658
02:13:12,040 --> 02:13:14,360
Speaker 2: to them of some violent person showing up with guns.

2659
02:13:15,080 --> 02:13:17,920
Speaker 2: And it's like whenever guns comes up on the show,

2660
02:13:19,000 --> 02:13:21,240
Speaker 2: like Chilaibel Shark was on last week and she asked

2661
02:13:21,280 --> 02:13:23,000
Speaker 2: me about it, and I was, you know, and I

2662
02:13:23,000 --> 02:13:24,840
Speaker 2: always say, I know, this is gonna be the most

2663
02:13:25,360 --> 02:13:28,839
Speaker 2: ridiculous answer. It's the one that no one's gonna consider,

2664
02:13:29,040 --> 02:13:31,200
Speaker 2: and but it's the only answer I think that works,

2665
02:13:31,240 --> 02:13:34,200
Speaker 2: which is you have to take all the guns, you know,

2666
02:13:34,320 --> 02:13:36,480
Speaker 2: And it's always like that, well, that's not gonna happen.

2667
02:13:36,520 --> 02:13:38,240
Speaker 2: I'm like I know, but you asked me if I

2668
02:13:38,280 --> 02:13:42,240
Speaker 2: could solve this thing. There's only one solution in America.

2669
02:13:43,440 --> 02:13:45,360
Speaker 2: No one can have the things. We don't know how

2670
02:13:45,360 --> 02:13:47,280
Speaker 2: to play with the toys. We eat the whole bag

2671
02:13:47,320 --> 02:13:52,120
Speaker 2: of chips, like Zach Sherwin. Once we pop a gun,

2672
02:13:52,160 --> 02:13:54,000
Speaker 2: once we pop a cap, we can't stop.

2673
02:13:54,800 --> 02:14:00,040
Speaker 4: I forget, I forget whose joke this is, but I

2674
02:14:00,040 --> 02:14:02,960
Speaker 4: think I saw it on Twitter recently, but it might

2675
02:14:03,000 --> 02:14:06,000
Speaker 4: have been Nick Batterot, somebody funny and nice and good

2676
02:14:06,480 --> 02:14:09,760
Speaker 4: was like, I think that wanting a gun should be

2677
02:14:09,920 --> 02:14:14,280
Speaker 4: a disqualifier in terms of getting a gun, like, yeah, one,

2678
02:14:14,320 --> 02:14:16,000
Speaker 4: you can't have one.

2679
02:14:15,840 --> 02:14:16,640
Speaker 3: Only the people.

2680
02:14:16,760 --> 02:14:18,480
Speaker 4: I think that should be like that for running for president.

2681
02:14:18,520 --> 02:14:19,600
Speaker 3: Also, just like.

2682
02:14:19,520 --> 02:14:21,280
Speaker 2: A childish gun if you know has a line where

2683
02:14:21,280 --> 02:14:24,160
Speaker 2: he says, and what's the leader? If he isn't reluctant,

2684
02:14:24,720 --> 02:14:26,320
Speaker 2: like that's.

2685
02:14:27,120 --> 02:14:29,280
Speaker 5: All they can understand the responsibility.

2686
02:14:29,360 --> 02:14:32,320
Speaker 7: Because the thing is people their own guns, that are

2687
02:14:32,360 --> 02:14:33,400
Speaker 7: good gun owners.

2688
02:14:33,400 --> 02:14:34,520
Speaker 5: The last thing they.

2689
02:14:34,400 --> 02:14:36,360
Speaker 7: Want to do is to make people aware that they

2690
02:14:36,400 --> 02:14:38,000
Speaker 7: have a gun, Like can you talk to people that

2691
02:14:38,080 --> 02:14:40,320
Speaker 7: go No. I was in a situation and I had

2692
02:14:40,400 --> 02:14:42,800
Speaker 7: my gun. Guess what I wasn't trying to shoot nobody.

2693
02:14:42,800 --> 02:14:44,320
Speaker 7: I don't hay down like everybody else.

2694
02:14:44,400 --> 02:14:45,960
Speaker 2: No one wants to be around a guy who can't

2695
02:14:46,000 --> 02:14:48,560
Speaker 2: wait to shoot somebody right, Like I played basketball with

2696
02:14:48,600 --> 02:14:48,960
Speaker 2: that guy.

2697
02:14:49,080 --> 02:14:52,839
Speaker 6: It's very, very anxiety causing.

2698
02:14:52,920 --> 02:14:55,880
Speaker 2: Okay, there's nothing worse than being at the basketball court

2699
02:14:55,920 --> 02:14:57,680
Speaker 2: with the dude that do you know for a fact

2700
02:14:57,760 --> 02:15:00,320
Speaker 2: got a gun and can't wait for some thing to

2701
02:15:00,400 --> 02:15:02,640
Speaker 2: happen because he can use the gun in front everybody

2702
02:15:02,720 --> 02:15:05,360
Speaker 2: like that. I've literally left the basketball court. I just

2703
02:15:05,400 --> 02:15:07,920
Speaker 2: see certain people. I'm like, no, not today, it's just

2704
02:15:08,000 --> 02:15:09,680
Speaker 2: we're not playing. I'm not playing. They're like, well, go

2705
02:15:09,720 --> 02:15:11,920
Speaker 2: ahead and play. I'm like, what if today's the fucking day?

2706
02:15:12,040 --> 02:15:13,760
Speaker 2: What if I'm the guy? What if you're the guy?

2707
02:15:13,800 --> 02:15:16,040
Speaker 2: I don't want to be here. You know, I get

2708
02:15:16,080 --> 02:15:19,120
Speaker 2: good grades. You know, if you've ever read a newspaper,

2709
02:15:19,200 --> 02:15:23,120
Speaker 2: every newspaper is like this scholarship person who had no

2710
02:15:23,160 --> 02:15:26,280
Speaker 2: business fucking being here got killed today. Like I didn't

2711
02:15:26,280 --> 02:15:28,680
Speaker 2: want to be that guy for my friends to read

2712
02:15:28,720 --> 02:15:30,920
Speaker 2: that shit, so I just go home or whatever. But

2713
02:15:31,040 --> 02:15:33,760
Speaker 2: that but that's the real solution, is like if that

2714
02:15:33,800 --> 02:15:37,280
Speaker 2: guy didn't have a gun to even that, so that

2715
02:15:37,360 --> 02:15:40,440
Speaker 2: his mentality did not matter in that level of way

2716
02:15:40,600 --> 02:15:44,200
Speaker 2: where the amount of HARMY could do was limit limited

2717
02:15:44,720 --> 02:15:47,960
Speaker 2: significantly compared to him having that gun. Well, then I

2718
02:15:48,000 --> 02:15:50,000
Speaker 2: would play basketball with him, and then I would feel

2719
02:15:50,000 --> 02:15:52,919
Speaker 2: a lot safer, And I think America deserves to feel safer,

2720
02:15:53,400 --> 02:15:56,120
Speaker 2: Like we don't like the people that should have guns

2721
02:15:56,120 --> 02:15:59,200
Speaker 2: should all be people that are like uh, I was

2722
02:15:59,240 --> 02:16:03,800
Speaker 2: appointed to have a gun because nobody else was past

2723
02:16:03,880 --> 02:16:05,440
Speaker 2: the test to be able to have a gun. And

2724
02:16:05,480 --> 02:16:07,600
Speaker 2: I hope to god I'd never have to fuck use

2725
02:16:07,640 --> 02:16:10,280
Speaker 2: this gun. It would really ruin my day. I don't

2726
02:16:10,360 --> 02:16:12,920
Speaker 2: need the guy using the gun. And then you know,

2727
02:16:13,000 --> 02:16:15,520
Speaker 2: writing a letter to the other cops like the guy

2728
02:16:15,560 --> 02:16:18,760
Speaker 2: and the Breonna Taylor thing, going like they're thugs, and

2729
02:16:18,800 --> 02:16:21,320
Speaker 2: we're like, no, you should never have gotten a gun.

2730
02:16:21,360 --> 02:16:24,760
Speaker 2: Look how you think all You're not thinking of protecting

2731
02:16:24,760 --> 02:16:27,920
Speaker 2: and serving the people. You're thinking of yourself as above

2732
02:16:27,960 --> 02:16:29,880
Speaker 2: the people with a gun, you know what I mean.

2733
02:16:29,960 --> 02:16:32,840
Speaker 2: So I think that's what matters, in a weird way,

2734
02:16:33,720 --> 02:16:36,879
Speaker 2: what I like about Biden. And just for the record,

2735
02:16:37,160 --> 02:16:40,760
Speaker 2: wasn't my first choice, okay, but there were lots of

2736
02:16:40,840 --> 02:16:42,879
Speaker 2: choices that I thought were good. To be honest, I'm

2737
02:16:42,879 --> 02:16:45,000
Speaker 2: not I'm not the other way where I thought every

2738
02:16:45,080 --> 02:16:47,640
Speaker 2: choice was bad. I actually liked quite a few people.

2739
02:16:47,640 --> 02:16:49,360
Speaker 2: He was on the list of people all been like cool,

2740
02:16:49,560 --> 02:16:51,360
Speaker 2: he was on the list that better than Trump and

2741
02:16:51,400 --> 02:16:53,640
Speaker 2: could be president. But from my point being, one of

2742
02:16:53,680 --> 02:16:56,240
Speaker 2: the things I do like about him, he kind of

2743
02:16:56,240 --> 02:16:58,400
Speaker 2: seems like he didn't really want the job. He just

2744
02:16:58,440 --> 02:17:01,760
Speaker 2: felt obligated to take the job to be like, we

2745
02:17:01,840 --> 02:17:04,840
Speaker 2: have to get it away from this motherfucker. Like I like,

2746
02:17:04,920 --> 02:17:06,920
Speaker 2: I kind of like that about him. Now, I know

2747
02:17:07,000 --> 02:17:09,600
Speaker 2: that's not ideal. You normally like when people running, they're

2748
02:17:10,040 --> 02:17:11,760
Speaker 2: full of ideas that you're just like, I love all

2749
02:17:11,760 --> 02:17:15,000
Speaker 2: these ideas, you know what I mean. But in this case,

2750
02:17:15,120 --> 02:17:19,760
Speaker 2: it is very this very very significant case. I like

2751
02:17:19,840 --> 02:17:23,080
Speaker 2: that he's like, I'll just use the other people's plans,

2752
02:17:23,800 --> 02:17:25,840
Speaker 2: but I don't like this guy. We need to take

2753
02:17:25,840 --> 02:17:28,520
Speaker 2: it away from him. Like he has Jay Ensley's climate

2754
02:17:28,560 --> 02:17:31,440
Speaker 2: plan change plan. Now that was the most progressive climate

2755
02:17:31,520 --> 02:17:35,720
Speaker 2: change plan of everyone in the he does not seem

2756
02:17:35,760 --> 02:17:37,959
Speaker 2: attached to the shit cause he's just like, no, the

2757
02:17:38,040 --> 02:17:40,520
Speaker 2: goal is fuck this dude, you know what I mean,

2758
02:17:40,600 --> 02:17:44,200
Speaker 2: Like like Elizabeth Warren's college debt forgiveness plan.

2759
02:17:44,360 --> 02:17:47,320
Speaker 6: Okay, okay, yeah, give me, I'll do that.

2760
02:17:47,440 --> 02:17:50,360
Speaker 2: I'm not even attached to my plan, like like by

2761
02:17:50,400 --> 02:17:52,199
Speaker 2: the end, it's just gonna be like he fucking picked

2762
02:17:52,240 --> 02:17:54,920
Speaker 2: up pieces of all the good shit, and I would

2763
02:17:55,000 --> 02:17:55,800
Speaker 2: be fine with that.

2764
02:17:56,760 --> 02:17:57,840
Speaker 3: Just Democrat Voltron.

2765
02:17:58,160 --> 02:18:01,480
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, I'll formed the leg. And it's just fucking

2766
02:18:01,600 --> 02:18:06,320
Speaker 2: like Mark, I mean, is what's my man? Uh?

2767
02:18:06,360 --> 02:18:07,080
Speaker 5: What was my man?

2768
02:18:08,480 --> 02:18:13,000
Speaker 2: His Panic dude, Julian Castro, He's amazing. It's like that's

2769
02:18:13,040 --> 02:18:15,120
Speaker 2: just like the leg, you know what I mean, And

2770
02:18:15,200 --> 02:18:17,920
Speaker 2: like elizab Warren's a arm and like Bernie Sander's another arm.

2771
02:18:18,000 --> 02:18:20,959
Speaker 2: Like I'm okay with that, just for the fact that,

2772
02:18:21,280 --> 02:18:24,880
Speaker 2: like I do like a little reluctance in my leadership.

2773
02:18:24,879 --> 02:18:28,360
Speaker 2: I do like a little like someone's got to do this, guys,

2774
02:18:28,600 --> 02:18:32,440
Speaker 2: and I'll do it out not necessarily one hundred percent

2775
02:18:32,480 --> 02:18:35,360
Speaker 2: out of ego, you know, if.

2776
02:18:35,240 --> 02:18:36,680
Speaker 3: I may, I like that.

2777
02:18:37,000 --> 02:18:40,720
Speaker 4: If the choices are like between somebody who's gonna undo

2778
02:18:40,800 --> 02:18:44,720
Speaker 4: everything Obama did or redo everything Obama did, you know,

2779
02:18:45,840 --> 02:18:47,680
Speaker 4: I'll pick redo.

2780
02:18:49,600 --> 02:18:52,760
Speaker 3: Undo, Like I want.

2781
02:18:52,560 --> 02:18:55,759
Speaker 7: To unsubscribe and resubscribe control.

2782
02:18:55,600 --> 02:19:03,000
Speaker 4: All to this a thing also about guns and like

2783
02:19:03,040 --> 02:19:05,920
Speaker 4: the capacity, like I'm I'd love for no one to

2784
02:19:05,959 --> 02:19:07,840
Speaker 4: have them and for everyone. I'd love for everyone to

2785
02:19:07,879 --> 02:19:10,360
Speaker 4: be happy and nice and everything. We all live in

2786
02:19:10,360 --> 02:19:13,320
Speaker 4: a magical world, uh where where everyone loves each other.

2787
02:19:13,520 --> 02:19:17,760
Speaker 4: And uh, I'm making fun of myself. But some of

2788
02:19:17,800 --> 02:19:20,879
Speaker 4: the arguments that come like uh where they're like guns,

2789
02:19:20,959 --> 02:19:24,760
Speaker 4: Like look, cars kill people, right, cars kill people? And

2790
02:19:24,760 --> 02:19:27,520
Speaker 4: we're like, and you need to pass a ten you

2791
02:19:27,560 --> 02:19:30,600
Speaker 4: get like those very.

2792
02:19:29,879 --> 02:19:32,640
Speaker 3: You need to prove that you never kill people with

2793
02:19:32,800 --> 02:19:36,480
Speaker 3: your car. Let's have out for the guns if you and.

2794
02:19:36,400 --> 02:19:38,280
Speaker 5: If you start killing people with the car, guess what

2795
02:19:38,320 --> 02:19:38,600
Speaker 5: we do.

2796
02:19:38,640 --> 02:19:41,560
Speaker 2: We take the car away. You don't get to do we.

2797
02:19:41,480 --> 02:19:43,800
Speaker 5: Take your license away, We take the car away.

2798
02:19:43,879 --> 02:19:46,080
Speaker 6: We also don't have like cars where you can just

2799
02:19:46,160 --> 02:19:49,039
Speaker 6: like kill a couple of hundred people at the Saint.

2800
02:19:48,959 --> 02:19:51,240
Speaker 2: Like you know what I mean, Like like you can't.

2801
02:19:51,360 --> 02:19:53,440
Speaker 4: You can only kill very few people with a car.

2802
02:19:54,080 --> 02:19:57,320
Speaker 2: Yeah, Like come on, man, we're trying here. Listen. Mike

2803
02:19:57,600 --> 02:20:01,240
Speaker 2: has been great, it's been fun. We're We've talked a

2804
02:20:01,240 --> 02:20:03,920
Speaker 2: long time about everything and nothing at the same time.

2805
02:20:04,120 --> 02:20:07,280
Speaker 2: I feel like we always do oh yeah, tell the

2806
02:20:07,320 --> 02:20:10,879
Speaker 2: people where to find you, tell the people about the album,

2807
02:20:11,200 --> 02:20:13,520
Speaker 2: and uh, and then we'll get out of here.

2808
02:20:14,280 --> 02:20:17,320
Speaker 4: I will and in fact, the last two things of

2809
02:20:17,320 --> 02:20:20,600
Speaker 4: my one million things to say will fall neatly here.

2810
02:20:20,879 --> 02:20:24,039
Speaker 4: I just want to, in conclusion, big up your the

2811
02:20:24,080 --> 02:20:26,960
Speaker 4: way that you guys do TV reviews like, because that

2812
02:20:27,480 --> 02:20:30,640
Speaker 4: to me like finding the positive, finding what you like.

2813
02:20:30,760 --> 02:20:34,000
Speaker 4: It's good practice for finding things you like. You know

2814
02:20:34,080 --> 02:20:36,879
Speaker 4: in the world, in your friendships and your relationship like

2815
02:20:36,920 --> 02:20:39,039
Speaker 4: and if there's something that you don't like, then get.

2816
02:20:38,959 --> 02:20:40,720
Speaker 3: Rid of it, don't watch it, don't engage with it.

2817
02:20:40,760 --> 02:20:42,879
Speaker 4: But for the things that have to be in your life,

2818
02:20:42,879 --> 02:20:45,920
Speaker 4: whether it's the country that you live in, the relationships

2819
02:20:45,920 --> 02:20:48,640
Speaker 4: that don't seem like they're going anywhere, the TV shows

2820
02:20:48,640 --> 02:20:51,520
Speaker 4: that you even love, but maybe this season isn't your favorite.

2821
02:20:51,720 --> 02:20:55,160
Speaker 4: Like I've always I've said this, I love that. My

2822
02:20:55,240 --> 02:20:58,480
Speaker 4: idea for movie reviews would be movie reviews should only

2823
02:20:58,520 --> 02:21:02,800
Speaker 4: happen for movies that people like at least something about yes,

2824
02:21:03,000 --> 02:21:06,760
Speaker 4: because if they pan it like what, then then when

2825
02:21:06,800 --> 02:21:08,480
Speaker 4: you see a movie with a lot of reviews, you'll

2826
02:21:08,520 --> 02:21:11,000
Speaker 4: be like, Wow, people must really like this one. And

2827
02:21:11,040 --> 02:21:13,280
Speaker 4: if you see like the big reviewers.

2828
02:21:12,760 --> 02:21:15,440
Speaker 3: Like oh who who likes? Who? Do I like that

2829
02:21:15,560 --> 02:21:15,920
Speaker 3: likes this?

2830
02:21:16,280 --> 02:21:17,840
Speaker 4: And if there's only a few, be like, maybe I'll

2831
02:21:17,840 --> 02:21:19,840
Speaker 4: read them, maybe it'll be for me. Like I just

2832
02:21:19,840 --> 02:21:22,800
Speaker 4: saw the movie I'm Thinking of Ending Things, and I've

2833
02:21:22,800 --> 02:21:26,039
Speaker 4: gotten a few weird and or not great reviews about it,

2834
02:21:26,120 --> 02:21:28,320
Speaker 4: but I read I got another one that.

2835
02:21:28,320 --> 02:21:30,800
Speaker 3: Was kind of like I think you, I thought of you, and.

2836
02:21:31,040 --> 02:21:34,199
Speaker 4: I like Charlie Kaufman and some some of this weird stuff.

2837
02:21:34,280 --> 02:21:37,320
Speaker 4: And we watched it the other night and I really

2838
02:21:37,520 --> 02:21:39,800
Speaker 4: got into it, and I like, I'd watch it again,

2839
02:21:39,840 --> 02:21:42,440
Speaker 4: and I want to watch Senecticky New York again anyway,

2840
02:21:42,480 --> 02:21:46,160
Speaker 4: So just I find value in your finding value in there.

2841
02:21:46,520 --> 02:21:51,000
Speaker 2: And yeah, we do. We do spoil movie reviews. And

2842
02:21:51,320 --> 02:21:53,680
Speaker 2: one of the things we do one we spoil it, right,

2843
02:21:53,760 --> 02:21:55,800
Speaker 2: so we want to do movie reviews for people that

2844
02:21:55,840 --> 02:21:58,920
Speaker 2: are okay with us talking about it, but two we

2845
02:21:59,160 --> 02:22:02,200
Speaker 2: say what do we like? And then the other segments

2846
02:22:02,240 --> 02:22:05,400
Speaker 2: where we didn't like. So like every cause I feel

2847
02:22:05,480 --> 02:22:08,520
Speaker 2: like there's something to like about every fucking there's a

2848
02:22:08,680 --> 02:22:10,840
Speaker 2: you did a thing. It's a major undertaking to make

2849
02:22:10,879 --> 02:22:14,160
Speaker 2: a movie. Very rarely have we seen a movie a

2850
02:22:14,200 --> 02:22:16,160
Speaker 2: It's like, I can't think of one thing.

2851
02:22:16,560 --> 02:22:19,160
Speaker 6: It's rare that we like. There's always like a character,

2852
02:22:19,240 --> 02:22:20,160
Speaker 6: actor or like.

2853
02:22:20,200 --> 02:22:23,480
Speaker 7: Something funny, like it's bad, but this person acted the ass.

2854
02:22:23,760 --> 02:22:26,720
Speaker 2: Yeah, there's always something and I think that that matters

2855
02:22:26,760 --> 02:22:28,840
Speaker 2: because if not, it does become a hate fest. And

2856
02:22:29,320 --> 02:22:32,840
Speaker 2: also with our TV recaps, because of the tone of

2857
02:22:32,920 --> 02:22:37,320
Speaker 2: us liking things, it makes our audience people who like things,

2858
02:22:38,040 --> 02:22:40,240
Speaker 2: So it's like a feedback loop of them being like,

2859
02:22:40,440 --> 02:22:42,680
Speaker 2: I love your reviews and I love the show, and

2860
02:22:42,720 --> 02:22:44,879
Speaker 2: the people that kind of hate it just kind of fall.

2861
02:22:44,720 --> 02:22:46,840
Speaker 5: Away because they're not very positive.

2862
02:22:46,959 --> 02:22:48,600
Speaker 6: Yeah, they're like, oh, well, why would I want to

2863
02:22:48,680 --> 02:22:49,560
Speaker 6: ruin your good time?

2864
02:22:50,800 --> 02:22:53,679
Speaker 3: So the exactly.

2865
02:22:54,879 --> 02:22:57,160
Speaker 4: Now to answer your question to tell people about the album,

2866
02:22:57,160 --> 02:22:58,960
Speaker 4: I'm gonna do a brief It's gonna seem a little

2867
02:22:59,000 --> 02:23:01,520
Speaker 4: round about. You won't know it exactly how it's coming,

2868
02:23:01,520 --> 02:23:04,800
Speaker 4: but it's a demonstration of the kind of thing that

2869
02:23:04,879 --> 02:23:08,160
Speaker 4: might happen on the album as well. So there's a

2870
02:23:08,400 --> 02:23:11,440
Speaker 4: there's a zen story I've heard about where there's like

2871
02:23:11,480 --> 02:23:16,960
Speaker 4: a Chinese farmer and family and their horse runs away

2872
02:23:17,440 --> 02:23:20,920
Speaker 4: and somebody's like, oh, bad luck, and then one of

2873
02:23:20,959 --> 02:23:23,400
Speaker 4: the farmers is like maybe yes, maybe no. The next

2874
02:23:23,520 --> 02:23:26,520
Speaker 4: day the horse comes back with another horse that it

2875
02:23:26,600 --> 02:23:28,680
Speaker 4: found out in the wild, and like, oh, you've got

2876
02:23:28,720 --> 02:23:29,400
Speaker 4: a new horse.

2877
02:23:29,480 --> 02:23:32,320
Speaker 3: Now, great news, and they're like maybe yes, maybe no.

2878
02:23:32,959 --> 02:23:35,720
Speaker 4: Then the next day the sun in the family starts

2879
02:23:35,760 --> 02:23:38,520
Speaker 4: to tame the new horse and gets thrown from it

2880
02:23:38,600 --> 02:23:40,359
Speaker 4: and his leg breaks, and they're.

2881
02:23:40,200 --> 02:23:42,879
Speaker 3: Like, oh, a broken leg, bad news. And they're like

2882
02:23:42,959 --> 02:23:44,000
Speaker 3: maybe yes, maybe no.

2883
02:23:44,400 --> 02:23:46,520
Speaker 4: Then the next day or the next thing that happens,

2884
02:23:46,879 --> 02:23:50,480
Speaker 4: the army comes through and they're like, we're drafting all

2885
02:23:50,640 --> 02:23:55,279
Speaker 4: able bodied young men into the fight. And they're like, oh,

2886
02:23:55,480 --> 02:23:58,520
Speaker 4: he broke his leg. He doesn't have to be drafted.

2887
02:23:58,760 --> 02:23:59,360
Speaker 4: Great news.

2888
02:23:59,400 --> 02:24:01,120
Speaker 3: They're like, may, yes, maybe no.

2889
02:24:01,600 --> 02:24:05,560
Speaker 4: And so this is to say in my life, I

2890
02:24:05,600 --> 02:24:08,600
Speaker 4: put out an album before I ever even really started

2891
02:24:08,600 --> 02:24:10,880
Speaker 4: doing comedy. I had written a few jokes and I

2892
02:24:10,920 --> 02:24:13,640
Speaker 4: was doing music and it was called open Mic Night,

2893
02:24:14,680 --> 02:24:17,520
Speaker 4: and I recorded it at an open mic night in Boston.

2894
02:24:17,560 --> 02:24:20,080
Speaker 3: Over the course of twelve weeks. I did like five.

2895
02:24:19,879 --> 02:24:22,120
Speaker 4: Minutes a night, one song and like two minutes of

2896
02:24:22,200 --> 02:24:25,560
Speaker 4: jokes tonight. And so the album exists in my mother's

2897
02:24:25,560 --> 02:24:29,280
Speaker 4: basement and like, I have the tracks, but it didn't

2898
02:24:29,280 --> 02:24:32,320
Speaker 4: have an ISBN number, Like you couldn't get it on Amazon,

2899
02:24:32,480 --> 02:24:34,840
Speaker 4: like it was you would have to know me to

2900
02:24:34,879 --> 02:24:35,600
Speaker 4: get the album.

2901
02:24:36,240 --> 02:24:38,440
Speaker 3: And I was like oh man.

2902
02:24:38,520 --> 02:24:40,840
Speaker 4: Like later, I saw like a friend self publish a

2903
02:24:40,879 --> 02:24:42,440
Speaker 4: book and he had it on Amazon.

2904
02:24:42,440 --> 02:24:44,080
Speaker 3: I was like, oh no, I wish I did that.

2905
02:24:44,200 --> 02:24:46,080
Speaker 3: I could have done it. Why did I do that?

2906
02:24:46,320 --> 02:24:49,520
Speaker 4: Cut to seven seven years later, I'm doing comedy. I'm

2907
02:24:49,520 --> 02:24:52,480
Speaker 4: at a conference to get booked to perform at colleges.

2908
02:24:52,840 --> 02:24:54,879
Speaker 4: I was there two years in a row. I had

2909
02:24:54,959 --> 02:24:58,560
Speaker 4: great sets both years. I gave out that album after

2910
02:24:58,680 --> 02:25:01,440
Speaker 4: the first year. The next year, a guy came up

2911
02:25:01,480 --> 02:25:02,080
Speaker 4: to me and he's like.

2912
02:25:02,080 --> 02:25:04,440
Speaker 3: I saw you last year. You were great. I saw

2913
02:25:04,480 --> 02:25:06,600
Speaker 3: you this year. You were great. Last year.

2914
02:25:06,600 --> 02:25:09,080
Speaker 4: You gave us this album and we listened to it,

2915
02:25:09,240 --> 02:25:12,879
Speaker 4: and it's not representative of what you're doing. So we

2916
02:25:13,040 --> 02:25:17,440
Speaker 4: didn't book you last year because we didn't remember your set.

2917
02:25:17,480 --> 02:25:19,280
Speaker 3: We just were trying to like, who is this guy?

2918
02:25:19,520 --> 02:25:22,600
Speaker 4: Oh don't I don't know about this, and so I'm like, oh, now,

2919
02:25:22,680 --> 02:25:25,600
Speaker 4: I'm so grateful. It seemed like, Oh, you forgot to

2920
02:25:25,959 --> 02:25:28,520
Speaker 4: you forgot to make your album accessible to everyone. Oh no,

2921
02:25:28,680 --> 02:25:31,720
Speaker 4: maybe yes, maybe no you Oh you didn't have your

2922
02:25:31,760 --> 02:25:34,920
Speaker 4: album that isn't representative of who you're going to become.

2923
02:25:34,959 --> 02:25:38,080
Speaker 3: The available to everyone. That's great news. Maybe yes, maybe no.

2924
02:25:38,280 --> 02:25:38,920
Speaker 3: This is all to.

2925
02:25:38,879 --> 02:25:42,560
Speaker 4: Say, I'm great he as grateful as I am that

2926
02:25:42,560 --> 02:25:46,680
Speaker 4: that album is no longer available to almost anyone unless

2927
02:25:46,680 --> 02:25:49,760
Speaker 4: they do the most work or ask me, and I

2928
02:25:49,840 --> 02:25:52,800
Speaker 4: give them the greatest disclaimer that it's not even representative

2929
02:25:52,800 --> 02:25:54,560
Speaker 4: of who I was twelve.

2930
02:25:54,200 --> 02:25:56,760
Speaker 3: Years ago, let alone now.

2931
02:25:56,840 --> 02:26:00,240
Speaker 4: The album AKA that I put out this year, that

2932
02:26:00,320 --> 02:26:03,480
Speaker 4: you graciously had me on this show to promote when

2933
02:26:03,480 --> 02:26:05,560
Speaker 4: it came out in May and again right now. And

2934
02:26:05,600 --> 02:26:09,000
Speaker 4: I'll come back anytime that we want, and I can

2935
02:26:09,240 --> 02:26:09,800
Speaker 4: because I.

2936
02:26:09,760 --> 02:26:10,960
Speaker 3: Love talking to you guys.

2937
02:26:11,200 --> 02:26:15,560
Speaker 4: That album is representative of who I at least who

2938
02:26:15,560 --> 02:26:18,520
Speaker 4: I was last year, and I've listened to it more

2939
02:26:18,720 --> 02:26:21,800
Speaker 4: this year and I feel strongly about it, and I'd

2940
02:26:21,840 --> 02:26:25,800
Speaker 4: love for anyone to listen to it if you're a

2941
02:26:25,840 --> 02:26:30,520
Speaker 4: Grammy voter, especially anybody, And thank you for spreading the

2942
02:26:30,560 --> 02:26:35,720
Speaker 4: words too, with hashtag for your consideration, hashtag Recording Academy,

2943
02:26:35,840 --> 02:26:39,240
Speaker 4: hashtag Grammy's or Grammy or gram Mike Grammy with a

2944
02:26:39,320 --> 02:26:42,080
Speaker 4: Q at the end of it like Grammy and ends

2945
02:26:42,080 --> 02:26:45,199
Speaker 4: with Mike. Whatever you can do sharing my posts, letting

2946
02:26:45,200 --> 02:26:48,440
Speaker 4: people know about the album, or just listening yourself, I

2947
02:26:48,480 --> 02:26:51,280
Speaker 4: really appreciate it. I'm thrilled to have created it and

2948
02:26:51,320 --> 02:26:54,280
Speaker 4: to let people know. So thank you Roden Karen for

2949
02:26:54,560 --> 02:26:57,959
Speaker 4: having me here as much as you do, and if

2950
02:26:58,000 --> 02:27:02,240
Speaker 4: not in quantity, in quantity as well, but especially in quality.

2951
02:27:02,480 --> 02:27:03,760
Speaker 3: It's a real pleasure.

2952
02:27:03,840 --> 02:27:06,920
Speaker 2: Thank you, Mike, Thank you for coming. It's always fun.

2953
02:27:06,959 --> 02:27:10,320
Speaker 2: We always have these fun conversations and uh yeah, the

2954
02:27:10,360 --> 02:27:14,240
Speaker 2: audience always seems to enjoy these specials in like episodes.

2955
02:27:14,640 --> 02:27:17,959
Speaker 2: So thank you for coming. And I'll check out AKA

2956
02:27:18,120 --> 02:27:20,880
Speaker 2: if you, especially if you're a Grammy voter, make sure

2957
02:27:20,920 --> 02:27:22,640
Speaker 2: you check it out. Let's go ahead and see what

2958
02:27:22,680 --> 02:27:25,800
Speaker 2: we can do. And uh, are you are you doing

2959
02:27:25,800 --> 02:27:28,720
Speaker 2: any stand up anywhere? I guess not stand up, but like.

2960
02:27:29,920 --> 02:27:33,200
Speaker 3: Great, great question. Well, actually I will be.

2961
02:27:33,680 --> 02:27:36,480
Speaker 4: I have like a couple I perform in the park

2962
02:27:36,560 --> 02:27:37,760
Speaker 4: near my house once in a while.

2963
02:27:38,360 --> 02:27:40,080
Speaker 3: Uh, and I do.

2964
02:27:40,280 --> 02:27:42,160
Speaker 4: There may be another thing that's coming up in a

2965
02:27:42,200 --> 02:27:45,520
Speaker 4: couple of weeks, but for sure, on October seventh, which

2966
02:27:45,560 --> 02:27:50,520
Speaker 4: is my birthday, I am doing a live stream show

2967
02:27:50,560 --> 02:27:54,000
Speaker 4: that anyone can watch from anywhere at the Nowhere Comedy Club,

2968
02:27:54,040 --> 02:27:55,200
Speaker 4: an online comedy club.

2969
02:27:56,160 --> 02:27:57,560
Speaker 3: Tickets are if you.

2970
02:27:57,879 --> 02:28:00,720
Speaker 4: I actually haven't even posted it anywhere yet, but it's

2971
02:28:00,720 --> 02:28:04,280
Speaker 4: the Nowhere Comedy Club October seventh, my but and already

2972
02:28:04,320 --> 02:28:06,680
Speaker 4: some tickets have sold, so I'm grateful for that. Josh

2973
02:28:06,760 --> 02:28:09,880
Speaker 4: Gondlman is going to be on the show, Liz Glazer

2974
02:28:09,920 --> 02:28:11,240
Speaker 4: is going to be on the show Two of My

2975
02:28:11,400 --> 02:28:15,280
Speaker 4: Funniest Wonderful friends, and Teresa Lee, who's also a wonderful

2976
02:28:15,480 --> 02:28:17,879
Speaker 4: comedian friend, is going to be hosting. So that's a

2977
02:28:17,920 --> 02:28:22,640
Speaker 4: show that people can check out. Also, every Saturday, I

2978
02:28:22,680 --> 02:28:26,600
Speaker 4: do a live stream zoom where I record a podcast live,

2979
02:28:26,800 --> 02:28:28,840
Speaker 4: So if you're ever interested in that, send me a

2980
02:28:28,879 --> 02:28:32,520
Speaker 4: message online at Mike Kaplan Mike Kaplan at Gmail. You

2981
02:28:32,560 --> 02:28:34,480
Speaker 4: can be in the audience or you can listen to

2982
02:28:34,920 --> 02:28:37,840
Speaker 4: them after when I release them. It's called The Faucet.

2983
02:28:37,920 --> 02:28:40,720
Speaker 4: My other podcast is Broccoli and ice Cream and the

2984
02:28:40,760 --> 02:28:42,800
Speaker 4: album But if you if you only listen to one

2985
02:28:42,840 --> 02:28:44,720
Speaker 4: thing AKA but if you want to come out to

2986
02:28:44,760 --> 02:28:48,640
Speaker 4: a live stream show any Saturday or October seventh, my

2987
02:28:48,720 --> 02:28:50,840
Speaker 4: birthday at the Nowhere Comedy Club.

2988
02:28:51,200 --> 02:28:56,160
Speaker 2: And follow my on social media. Check them out. Super

2989
02:28:56,200 --> 02:29:00,880
Speaker 2: funny man, super smart and just the way the things

2990
02:29:00,920 --> 02:29:03,200
Speaker 2: that Mike does with words and puns will make you

2991
02:29:03,240 --> 02:29:06,880
Speaker 2: hate yourself for loving for loving the puns and the

2992
02:29:06,920 --> 02:29:08,720
Speaker 2: words so much. And I know a lot of you

2993
02:29:08,760 --> 02:29:11,000
Speaker 2: guys love when me and Karen go on pun runs.

2994
02:29:11,000 --> 02:29:14,720
Speaker 2: But it's not even close to what what Mike is

2995
02:29:14,760 --> 02:29:16,320
Speaker 2: capable of doing, so check them out.

2996
02:29:16,320 --> 02:29:16,959
Speaker 3: Here's what I do.

2997
02:29:17,160 --> 02:29:19,800
Speaker 4: I'll say this will be the last thing on the subject.

2998
02:29:20,560 --> 02:29:23,680
Speaker 4: I put the H in pun and make it fun.

2999
02:29:25,800 --> 02:29:26,920
Speaker 2: See, don't you.

3000
02:29:26,840 --> 02:29:28,840
Speaker 5: Hate and love yourself at the same time.

3001
02:29:29,360 --> 02:29:29,960
Speaker 2: That was it?

3002
02:29:30,320 --> 02:29:30,720
Speaker 3: All right?

3003
02:29:30,840 --> 02:29:34,760
Speaker 2: Thank you so much, Mike. We'll be back tomorrow for

3004
02:29:34,800 --> 02:29:37,800
Speaker 2: our recap of a Lovecraft country, so we'll see you

3005
02:29:37,879 --> 02:29:40,440
Speaker 2: guys then. Until then, I love you, I love you too.

3006
02:29:40,560 --> 02:29:40,760
Speaker 3: Wow.