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Speaker 1: Hi.

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Speaker 2: I am Kate Hudson and my name is Oliver Hudson.

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Speaker 3: We wanted to do something that highlighted our.

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Speaker 2: Relationship and what it's like to be siblings.

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Speaker 3: We are a.

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Speaker 4: Sibling Railvalry No, no, sibling, val don't do that with

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Speaker 4: your mouth, Vely.

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Speaker 2: That's good.

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Speaker 1: It's Oliver Hudson here, solo mission, me and me and me,

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Speaker 1: not me myself, and i'd me me me.

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Speaker 2: I need to do more me me me because I

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Speaker 2: I don't take enough care of myself. I need to

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Speaker 2: go me me, me, me me. You know what.

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Speaker 1: I can do this whole fucking intro right now and

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Speaker 1: do a whole thing. But we have a guest waiting

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Speaker 1: in the waiting room and I need to get to

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Speaker 1: her because I'm excited to have conversations and talk about

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Speaker 1: life and bigger things and unscripted shows with husbands and

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Speaker 1: books and let's get into it.

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Speaker 2: Please bring on missus Baldwin, Larry Baldmin.

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Speaker 1: Hello, how are you. I'm good, I'm sorry, I'm late,

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Speaker 1: that's okay. I did a whole panel for my gut

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Speaker 1: health for you know, they did blood, they did this,

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Speaker 1: they did that. Unfortunately it was stool. I mean it

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Speaker 1: was everything. So I had a consultation after the fact

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Speaker 1: to go over every piece of my body, scared, hoping

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Speaker 1: that there wasn't some shit that is going to you.

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Speaker 2: Know, I'm going to not have much longer to live.

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Speaker 2: But so I was going through the whole process and

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Speaker 2: it was very interesting.

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Speaker 3: It can be interesting. That kind of thing always scares me.

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Speaker 5: Did you see you seeing me like full body scan

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Speaker 5: doing in Europe?

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Speaker 2: Yeah, well there's the pre nuvo stuff too.

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Speaker 5: I mean I don't know all the names, but I

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Speaker 5: was looking at this and I was like, you know what,

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Speaker 5: this would probably terrify me. But they stay within like

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Speaker 5: an hour or something like that. You know so much

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Speaker 5: about your.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, no, I did it.

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Speaker 1: I did a full body scan I think last year,

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Speaker 1: and uh yeah. Then you sit down with the technician

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Speaker 1: and the lead up is scary as shit.

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Speaker 2: You're just thinking, okay, you know any.

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Speaker 3: Any sort of health scarceuse. We all have like little

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Speaker 3: you know, Yeah, I.

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Speaker 5: Feel like we all have our things, and especially once

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Speaker 5: you at least for women, once we have kids, there's

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Speaker 5: not only things for us, but then there's things for

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Speaker 5: the kids too, and it's all scary. The best doctors

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Speaker 5: are people calling you this, nurses, whoever's calling to get

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Speaker 5: the result.

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Speaker 3: They will just like pick up the phone. They're like,

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Speaker 3: everything's fine.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm good, thank you.

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Speaker 3: No, I know, I know, don't ask me how I'm doing. Nothing,

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Speaker 3: just everything is fine.

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Speaker 2: You're yes, exactly, get into it. I love that.

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Speaker 1: I know, I totally agree. I mean, because you're just

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Speaker 1: waiting for some sort of a shoe to drop and

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Speaker 1: then the doctor's not calling you after you've done your

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Speaker 1: blood work and whatever, and oh my god, something's wrong.

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Speaker 1: And you know, I mean I have anxiety around health

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Speaker 1: for sure.

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Speaker 5: Very It's like, you know, we we so much focus

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Speaker 5: on all these material things and stresses and what people

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Speaker 5: think and stuff like that, and ultimately our health is

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Speaker 5: number one. But you know, I even say with you know,

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Speaker 5: the way that we've learned to communicate in with my

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Speaker 5: friends and my husband and and my family is I'm like,

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Speaker 5: start at the end and then let's.

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Speaker 3: Get to the story.

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Speaker 5: So, you know, my my son recently broke his collar

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Speaker 5: book and I wasn't there.

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Speaker 3: So if we start with.

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Speaker 5: Okay, Romeo is having X Y Z, and then we

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Speaker 5: can go back, just you know, once you start it

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Speaker 5: from the beginning, and you're like you're guessing and guessing.

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Speaker 3: And guessing, like what's happened? And now go back and learn.

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Speaker 5: And I've that's actually helped me tremendously with anxiety because

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Speaker 5: you just get there.

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Speaker 3: There's no lead up there.

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Speaker 2: That's great. Yeah, yeah, yeah, no, I like that. Yeah.

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Speaker 1: It's like when you get a call from the school.

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Speaker 1: But just happened fucking too many times with my insane children,

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Speaker 1: although they're great kids that get straight a's and they're amazing.

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Speaker 1: So you get that call from the from the school

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Speaker 1: and immediately you see the school on the on the

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Speaker 1: ID and you.

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Speaker 2: Pick it up and the first thing they say is

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Speaker 2: why is my one of my sons Wilder? He goes

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Speaker 2: Wilder is fine.

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Speaker 5: Okay, good, get to the end and then like what

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Speaker 5: we have to deal with? No, that's good for me.

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Speaker 5: It was when the nurse calls. So I have six

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Speaker 5: in the same school, and so the nurse calls and

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Speaker 5: she's like.

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Speaker 3: I'm like, which one is it here? And I'm like, great, yeah.

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Speaker 2: No, I I get I know.

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Speaker 1: And as when I had kids, I have three kids.

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Speaker 1: I have to say that this fear of death honestly

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Speaker 1: is gotten worse and it and it's not even a

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Speaker 1: selfish thing. It's more about my children, you know what

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Speaker 1: I mean, Like I go to this place of I

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Speaker 1: need to be here for them to continue on, you know,

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Speaker 1: imparting whatever wisdom or insanity.

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Speaker 2: That I'm going to give them.

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Speaker 1: But you know, I think that that is an issue

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Speaker 1: and I wish. I don't think you can truly truly

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Speaker 1: live until you have sort of gotten over this fear

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Speaker 1: of death. You know, there's liberation there.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, no, it's I think I bring my kids to

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Speaker 5: cemeteries a lot. It was, and I feel like and

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Speaker 5: first of all, I do, I feel very much like

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Speaker 5: you do. It's see, you know, it's it's once you

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Speaker 5: become a parent. I think that how fragile life can is,

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Speaker 5: can be very you know, it becomes very Uh it

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Speaker 5: comes into my fears all the time. But I I

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Speaker 5: really feel like, you know, we spend time in cemeteries

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Speaker 5: and you know, everything from like the history of it,

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Speaker 5: and just also acknowledging like.

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Speaker 3: This is part of life.

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Speaker 5: You know, this is part of life, and there's a

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Speaker 5: tremendous amount of peace there as well, and not being afraid,

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Speaker 5: you know, if not of death, but of people who

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Speaker 5: have died, you know, and because I don't want anyone

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Speaker 5: to be afraid of me when I die, so I

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Speaker 5: try to have that kind of connection with them.

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Speaker 3: But no, I mean, this is the this is the

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Speaker 3: human the human thing.

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Speaker 2: Do you have fears and anxieties? You know?

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Speaker 1: I mean, is this part of your of your life?

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Speaker 1: Is managing yourself to be the best for your kids

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Speaker 1: and your husband?

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Speaker 5: I mean, yeah, I mean I so I turned forty

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Speaker 5: one this year, and I feel like, for what I

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Speaker 5: hear from other women, I feel like forty is a

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Speaker 5: big growing up phase in life. You know, I've had

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Speaker 5: my kids, I doubt I'll have any more, and I

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Speaker 5: have also not only do I have a lot of kids,

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Speaker 5: but I've been thrust into many experiences in life that.

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Speaker 3: I had zero preparation for.

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Speaker 5: I don't know if anyone would and and so yeah, no,

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Speaker 5: I mean it's definitely the fears of am I able

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Speaker 5: to do this? Am I good enough for this? You

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Speaker 5: know the title of my book, where's a manual for this?

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Speaker 5: Manuals not included? Like kids said anyone? And you know,

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Speaker 5: who can I call to get advice for this? And

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Speaker 5: you know there isn't anyone. But that's where I think,

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Speaker 5: you know, my my yoga practice, breathing, running, gratitude. I've

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Speaker 5: I've always been just a very grateful person anytime things

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Speaker 5: are going bad, and you know, somebody came up with

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Speaker 5: you know it came and.

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Speaker 3: Told me about toxic Oh don't be so toxic positive.

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Speaker 5: And I'm like, if I'm not positive somewhere or find

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Speaker 5: beauty somewhere, it's just going to get so.

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Speaker 3: Dark, you know.

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Speaker 5: So I try to cling onto some sort of beauty

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Speaker 5: and positivity wherever I can find it. So yeah, no,

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Speaker 5: I mean, it's definitely, it's definitely there. But then I

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Speaker 5: also think about the perspective and the experience that I

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Speaker 5: want my kids to remember when they're in their twenties

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Speaker 5: and thirties and beon.

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Speaker 3: And think how was my mom? How was my childhood?

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Speaker 5: All feign happiness sometimes just because I want them to

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Speaker 5: feel that joy, and they're very smarting sometimes were like.

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Speaker 2: Mm oh yeah, but at least oh no, they know,

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Speaker 2: they know, they know they're there.

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Speaker 1: Their intuition is so strong and spot on, and they

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Speaker 1: feel so much, and they pay attention way more than

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Speaker 1: we think that they're paying attention. My kids will sometimes

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Speaker 1: my daughter, what's wrong, Dad. I'm like, how did you know?

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Speaker 2: You know what I mean? Like, they can feel that that.

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Speaker 1: Energy, and I guess sometimes yeah, you got to put

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Speaker 1: on the good face and then sometimes you just got

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Speaker 1: to say yeah, you know, yeah I'm not good right now,

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Speaker 1: and that's okay.

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Speaker 3: Yeah. I'm a big believer in a healthy dose of.

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Speaker 5: That, because I think by not telling them you question

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Speaker 5: their sense of feeling and their own intuition. But we

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Speaker 5: talk a lot in our family as well about that

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Speaker 5: your feelings can lie to you, which I didn't grow up.

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Speaker 5: Everything is like, oh, we trust your feelings, trust you're good.

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Speaker 5: Sometimes your feelings are anxiety and they're not true. Yes,

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Speaker 5: sometimes your feelings are I feel like a horrible piece

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Speaker 5: of it today and this is just just so awful

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Speaker 5: and I'm the stupidest.

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Speaker 3: And that's not a true feeling.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, you know, you can validate that where that is

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Speaker 5: coming from, and that that is, you know, an anxiet,

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Speaker 5: But that's an anxiety.

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Speaker 3: That's not a true feeling.

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Speaker 5: And so I talk about that with my kids as well,

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Speaker 5: because ultimately what we want them to become is good

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Speaker 5: problem solvers. If they can solve you know, what, what

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Speaker 5: do I want to do with my life, what makes

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Speaker 5: me happy?

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Speaker 3: Who are good people to surround myself with?

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Speaker 5: You know? How How can I treat other people and

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Speaker 5: be a good citizen of this world? Then we're doing

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Speaker 5: a really good job.

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Speaker 2: I think as parents, that's what we try, that's what

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Speaker 2: that's what we strive for, you know. And we all

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Speaker 2: do it differently, which is so interesting as well. All

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Speaker 2: parents do it differently.

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Speaker 1: There is no Well it's interesting you know about your book,

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Speaker 1: you know, using the word manual, right, because there is

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Speaker 1: no manual, I mean. And I raise my kids so

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Speaker 1: differently than my sister does. And they're all great kids,

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Speaker 1: you know, but I have different theories and I have

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Speaker 1: different instincts than you might, and that Kate might, or

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Speaker 1: than anyone might, right, yeah, you know, And it's just

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Speaker 1: something And it's not about if we're fucking them up.

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Speaker 2: I think it's just to what degree, you know what

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Speaker 2: I mean, we are screwing them up one way or another.

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Speaker 2: It's just part of the life, you know, Right.

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Speaker 5: Well you might find as well that you know, with

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Speaker 5: your children, they're all so different, so you're going to

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Speaker 5: have to parent each one of them. Yes, you know,

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Speaker 5: I have a big brother and I look up to him,

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Speaker 5: and I think that he's since this is a sibling show,

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Speaker 5: since I think like.

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Speaker 3: The world of him.

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Speaker 5: And he has a my nephew who's twenty, and he

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Speaker 5: is just like such a good dad, and I got

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Speaker 5: so inspired by how he parents because it's, you know,

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Speaker 5: really about being together and connection. And you know, my

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Speaker 5: nephew is really close to him, like sleep in bed

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Speaker 5: in the bed with him, so you know, everybody's judging,

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Speaker 5: and my brother's like, it's not going to sleep in

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Speaker 5: bed with me when he's in college, you know. And

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Speaker 5: it's like he understood that these so he taught me

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Speaker 5: a lot about phases and you know, just kind of

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Speaker 5: really being present for the individual child that you have.

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Speaker 5: And so I'm different with in some ways. With all

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Speaker 5: of my kids, I've had to hone in.

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Speaker 2: And you know, just like hell yeah, all without a doubt.

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Speaker 2: I mean, I would do it.

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Speaker 1: My wife and I talk about it all the time,

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Speaker 1: how differently we would have done it with our first kid,

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Speaker 1: knowing what.

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Speaker 2: We know now.

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Speaker 1: I mean, it's night and day from one, number one

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Speaker 1: to number three, and you got number one to number seven.

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Speaker 1: So I'm sure there was a lot of evolution from

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Speaker 1: one to seven.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, no, no, no, and that but that's the thing,

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Speaker 5: is like teaching our kids that we are evolving and

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Speaker 5: we are, you know, imperfect. I was reading a something

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Speaker 5: about how people who have good relationships with their parents

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Speaker 5: as adults and what their parents did well as children

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Speaker 5: when they were children, and it was about saying that

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Speaker 5: you're sorry and admitting that when they were wrong and fallible.

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Speaker 5: And I think that that's one of the big you

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Speaker 5: know keys. I try to include my kids in an

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Speaker 5: empowering way in their growth. So you know, yes, they

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Speaker 5: have to do their home, Yes they have to eat

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Speaker 5: their vegetabs, Yes they.

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Speaker 3: Have to go to bed.

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Speaker 5: All of these there are rules, trust me, there are rules.

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Speaker 5: But the more that I can encourage them to feel

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Speaker 5: a purpose in their own growth and the why why

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Speaker 5: and taking the time even when I'm hearing seven whys

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Speaker 5: at the same time about seven different completely different subjects

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Speaker 5: and they're yelling at me at the same time. So

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Speaker 5: you can imagine a spinner. Not only I have seven,

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Speaker 5: I have seven very close together. Yeah, but that's something

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Speaker 5: that you know, hopefully, well, hopefully it will turn out well.

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Speaker 3: For our relationship.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, and so you have you have one sibling A

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Speaker 1: one sibling. Yeah, and so take us back, take us back.

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Speaker 2: Where were you? Where were you born? Where did you

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Speaker 2: grow up?

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Speaker 1: So?

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Speaker 3: I'm born in Boston.

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Speaker 5: My whole family lives in Spain, which was a big

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Speaker 5: part of my childhood as well. Is where my whole

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Speaker 5: family lives and we Yeah, my brother lives there. Oh,

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Speaker 5: he's lived there most of his life, and I've lived

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Speaker 5: here mostly.

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Speaker 2: Did you live in Boston?

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Speaker 3: I live in Boston, Boston yea yeah, yeah, yeah, Well.

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Speaker 2: That's my my in law. So my wife grew up.

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Speaker 1: They grew up in Boston, my in laws, like we

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Speaker 1: were in Brockton, and then my wife was in Long Meadow,

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Speaker 1: which is just uh, I know it. Yeah, and then

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Speaker 1: now we go to the cake.

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Speaker 2: We go to Falma every summer for three weeks.

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Speaker 3: But where are you? Where are you located now?

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Speaker 2: I'm in La born and raised La.

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Speaker 3: Born and raised in La. And are you how is

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Speaker 3: everything there?

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Speaker 2: It was crazy?

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Speaker 1: Yeah, the fires were definitely affected us. One of my

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Speaker 1: brother's houses went down, so now it sucks. Then my parents, Kate, myself,

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Speaker 1: our houses were not directly affected, but some smoke damage

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Speaker 1: and stuff like that.

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Speaker 3: You guys all live very near each other.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, we're all sort of eight ten minutes away everybody.

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Speaker 2: I love that.

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Speaker 3: That's so nice.

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Speaker 5: I tell that to my my kids, and they're having

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Speaker 5: conversation this morning because my my son, my oldest son,

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Speaker 5: went away to like this. I don't know if your

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Speaker 5: kids did, like a two day you go away with

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Speaker 5: your your class, like I.

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Speaker 3: Can't play bumps and stuff like that. And I was

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Speaker 3: a wreck. And it's so weird because I have seven kids,

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Speaker 3: and you would think that like six kids are.

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Speaker 5: Still like noisy, and it's like so quiet, even the

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Speaker 5: one and he's even like one and more quiet of

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Speaker 5: the bunch.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, it was just such a.

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Speaker 5: Weird changing the dynamic. And he came back yesterday and

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Speaker 5: I said to him, I said, you know that's it.

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Speaker 5: All of you guys are going to live inn account

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Speaker 5: compounds because we're all going to live with me forever.

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Speaker 2: I love that, No, I know.

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Speaker 1: I mean, and only do you truly understand the love

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Speaker 1: that your parents have for you once you have your

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Speaker 1: own children. You know, when we grow up and you

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Speaker 1: know your parents are loving on you, and they're concerned

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Speaker 1: about you, and and they just want you to sort

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Speaker 1: of be good human beings and and be well off

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Speaker 1: and be positive and oh mom, I got it, I

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Speaker 1: got it. And then when you have children and then

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Speaker 1: you are in their shoes. The appreciation now that I

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Speaker 1: have for my parents, you know, the love that has

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Speaker 1: deepened for them once I've had my kids, is astronomical

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Speaker 1: because I understand it now. I understand that you love

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Speaker 1: so hard.

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Speaker 2: That you don't even know what to do with it, right,

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Speaker 2: you know what I mean?

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Speaker 5: Also just you know, I mean I talk about, you know,

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Speaker 5: being fallible and just not understanding what to do. And

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Speaker 5: I always try to think about, you know, my parents,

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Speaker 5: my friend's parents, when we're at my friends and I,

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Speaker 5: you know, everybody off conversations and everything, and I think,

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Speaker 5: you know.

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Speaker 3: If I don't, none of us know what we're doing.

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Speaker 3: Most of the time, we're trying, we're trying our best.

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Speaker 5: And so I think becoming a parent is also a

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Speaker 5: really good dose of, you know, looking back and thinking, wow,

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Speaker 5: my parents were in their twenties and thirties and forties

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Speaker 5: and I and beyond hopefully you know, and and you

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Speaker 5: know the same thing like when I look at some

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Speaker 5: of these very difficult experiences I've had, I hope my

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Speaker 5: kids just.

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Speaker 3: Know that I was trying my best, and I hope.

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Speaker 5: That they know that there was no manual and in

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Speaker 5: the end, I just wanted everybody to be okay, and

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Speaker 5: and you know, it's a little bit of you know,

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Speaker 5: trial and error. I have a story in the book

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Speaker 5: we had, I think on our show. Yeah, I was

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Speaker 5: on our show as well about how you know I

356
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Speaker 5: have we have paparazzi downstairs sometimes and I'm always trying

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Speaker 5: to take care of Alec and try to get them

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Speaker 5: out of the house without these you know, because they're

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Speaker 5: the name of the games.

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Speaker 3: They don't care what they say. They're just trying to

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Speaker 3: get a reaction at it.

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Speaker 5: And I had one morning where I was like all

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Speaker 5: out of like all my tricks and I don't know

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Speaker 5: how these things come to mind, but I just come

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Speaker 5: up with like the craziest stuff to do sometimes and

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Speaker 5: I'm like crazy enough to try it. So I was like,

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Speaker 5: you know what, I don't know what's doing. It's so

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Speaker 5: cold outside. I go upstairs and sad, I'm gonna put

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Speaker 5: something crazy on and then I'm gonna try to lead

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Speaker 5: lure them away from the house and then get an

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Speaker 5: uber to come at the same time so they don't

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Speaker 5: recognize our car and Alec can go in and they

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Speaker 5: will be here. And so I put on fishnets and

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Speaker 5: this tinle skirt and it's like like I look ridiculous,

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00:18:20,760 --> 00:18:23,919
Speaker 5: but she gets it's like eleven side and freezing, and

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Speaker 5: I'm walking in very slowly and pretends me on the

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Speaker 5: phone and I'm walking, walking, walking to the corner and

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Speaker 5: you and sure enough they start following me, and I'm like,

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Speaker 5: this is like thirty percent chance of working.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, And they follow me.

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Speaker 5: And they're taking pictures and I kind of turn around

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Speaker 5: and I'm gazing at the door and see.

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Speaker 3: Alec like dirt into a car and drive away, and

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Speaker 3: I just like turned around and it was like.

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Speaker 5: I mean, in some ways like get leaning into trying

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Speaker 5: to find silly ways like pressful situations.

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Speaker 3: But he and then of course they love to like

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Speaker 3: call me a slug and stuff like that.

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Speaker 5: It's like, look, she just wanted to I'm like, well,

390
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Speaker 5: now I can tell you what I was doing.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, you guys, you made a game. You made a

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00:19:04,359 --> 00:19:06,280
Speaker 2: game out it made a game out of it.

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Speaker 5: And so there's times, by the way, I try these

394
00:19:08,880 --> 00:19:11,080
Speaker 5: things and sometimes it doesn't go well either, so you know,

395
00:19:11,520 --> 00:19:14,040
Speaker 5: or I don't win, but that was one where I went.

396
00:19:14,359 --> 00:19:16,680
Speaker 5: But again, that's like an example of like, I hope

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Speaker 5: people look back and be like, you know what, she's crazy,

398
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Speaker 5: but she's trying her very best.

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Speaker 2: Oh yeah, yeah.

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Speaker 1: And by the way, you know, because it was a

401
00:19:24,440 --> 00:19:28,800
Speaker 1: different time obviously then, but I grew up with famous parents,

402
00:19:28,840 --> 00:19:33,560
Speaker 1: so I had to deal with paparazzi and you know,

403
00:19:34,080 --> 00:19:37,679
Speaker 1: people in general, fans in general coming up to my

404
00:19:37,760 --> 00:19:42,480
Speaker 1: mom and Kurt and whatever that meant to me and

405
00:19:42,520 --> 00:19:44,720
Speaker 1: felt to me as a young kid might have been irrational,

406
00:19:44,760 --> 00:19:46,800
Speaker 1: but there were my feelings where I just didn't want

407
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Speaker 1: people invading our space and it gave me sort of

408
00:19:52,640 --> 00:19:55,480
Speaker 1: just angry feelings a lot of the time. And it's

409
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Speaker 1: a thing that you have to navigate as parents, especially

410
00:19:59,720 --> 00:20:03,679
Speaker 1: now in the spotlight, right, So how do you guys

411
00:20:04,720 --> 00:20:07,760
Speaker 1: deal with that, talk to your kids about it, you know,

412
00:20:07,960 --> 00:20:09,800
Speaker 1: or is it just kind of hey, guys, this is

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Speaker 1: what it is inside our four walls, it's all. It

414
00:20:13,720 --> 00:20:16,760
Speaker 1: is what it is, and when we go outside, you know, sorry,

415
00:20:16,800 --> 00:20:18,680
Speaker 1: not sorry, but this is our fucking life.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, I mean, I think it's after I answer, I'd

417
00:20:23,200 --> 00:20:26,119
Speaker 5: love to get your opinions. You lived it as a child,

418
00:20:26,240 --> 00:20:28,960
Speaker 5: and I not grow up as a famous person, So

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Speaker 5: I have no idea what I'm doing with famous parents.

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Speaker 3: But my I think it depends on what's going on.

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Speaker 5: And I think because these past few years have been

422
00:20:40,320 --> 00:20:45,160
Speaker 5: so difficult, we've a lot of the attention that is

423
00:20:45,640 --> 00:20:51,040
Speaker 5: coming at us. It was very, very aggressive because it

424
00:20:51,640 --> 00:20:55,560
Speaker 5: entered into a new realm where there was a feeling

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Speaker 5: of entitlement to go another step of the right relation,

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00:21:00,640 --> 00:21:02,560
Speaker 5: you know, to really like is it all of it

427
00:21:02,640 --> 00:21:05,159
Speaker 5: is a violation? Taking a picture without somebody's consent is

428
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Speaker 5: a violation, right, But then it gets to be like

429
00:21:07,720 --> 00:21:10,480
Speaker 5: we're like shoving you violations, you know what I mean.

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Speaker 5: And and so with the kids, you know, if they're

431
00:21:14,600 --> 00:21:16,399
Speaker 5: far away, we kind of like talk about it and

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00:21:16,480 --> 00:21:19,080
Speaker 5: bothers them because they see it bothers us, and that's

433
00:21:19,119 --> 00:21:22,480
Speaker 5: our fault, right we should One of the things where

434
00:21:22,520 --> 00:21:25,240
Speaker 5: I've made a mistake is I should just take a

435
00:21:25,280 --> 00:21:27,440
Speaker 5: deep breath and that like burning sort of like why

436
00:21:27,480 --> 00:21:30,840
Speaker 5: are you doing this to me? Saying I need to

437
00:21:30,960 --> 00:21:32,960
Speaker 5: learn how to calm down. So that's what I'm working

438
00:21:32,960 --> 00:21:33,440
Speaker 5: on in like.

439
00:21:34,080 --> 00:21:37,760
Speaker 1: My therapy, in you, in your therapy and your meditation,

440
00:21:37,960 --> 00:21:43,639
Speaker 1: and your journaling and breath in your wellness journey exactly.

441
00:21:43,720 --> 00:21:46,080
Speaker 5: And it's another step when they're like streaming stuff at

442
00:21:46,160 --> 00:21:48,160
Speaker 5: us that the kids are there, like you know that

443
00:21:48,160 --> 00:21:50,440
Speaker 5: that kind of thing, and there's no level of humanity.

444
00:21:50,480 --> 00:21:52,479
Speaker 3: I'll say them like, you know my kids, don't they hear, no,

445
00:21:52,640 --> 00:21:55,040
Speaker 3: we don't care. They say, I don't care about your kids.

446
00:21:55,160 --> 00:21:56,760
Speaker 5: They will actually say it, and then they cut that

447
00:21:56,800 --> 00:22:00,320
Speaker 5: part out when they when they sell. So I think

448
00:22:00,359 --> 00:22:02,560
Speaker 5: some of it is explaining the business, but I think

449
00:22:02,560 --> 00:22:04,399
Speaker 5: it goes back to what you were saying before.

450
00:22:04,600 --> 00:22:08,159
Speaker 3: Kids are smart. Kids are smart. They see things, you know.

451
00:22:08,200 --> 00:22:12,040
Speaker 5: I mean, how many kids of famous parents or famous

452
00:22:12,119 --> 00:22:14,159
Speaker 5: kids you see them like giving the middle.

453
00:22:13,880 --> 00:22:15,680
Speaker 3: Finger to like a paparazzi or something.

454
00:22:15,720 --> 00:22:20,000
Speaker 5: I have. My kids definitely happen, I'm like, but out

455
00:22:20,040 --> 00:22:22,359
Speaker 5: of them, they feel my boys. I have four boys,

456
00:22:22,400 --> 00:22:24,480
Speaker 5: and it is so funny how they feel. You know,

457
00:22:24,520 --> 00:22:28,679
Speaker 5: they're nine, eight, six, and four and they feel very

458
00:22:28,760 --> 00:22:32,080
Speaker 5: protective over their parents in certain ways like that.

459
00:22:32,080 --> 00:22:34,080
Speaker 3: They're just like especially like me, They're like, this is

460
00:22:34,119 --> 00:22:34,440
Speaker 3: my mom.

461
00:22:34,520 --> 00:22:37,960
Speaker 1: They're like kind of like yeah, yeah, So I don't

462
00:22:37,960 --> 00:22:39,399
Speaker 1: I don't know what the right answer is.

463
00:22:39,440 --> 00:22:41,960
Speaker 5: I mean it's it's somebody's Scially, when you're doing an

464
00:22:42,000 --> 00:22:44,240
Speaker 5: imperfect system.

465
00:22:43,880 --> 00:22:45,960
Speaker 3: Like you know, you're not going to make it better.

466
00:22:46,080 --> 00:22:48,879
Speaker 5: If it's just bad already and there's you know, people

467
00:22:48,960 --> 00:22:51,399
Speaker 5: behaving badly, you can't really fix it.

468
00:23:01,040 --> 00:23:04,320
Speaker 1: Do you see it affecting either of your kids differently?

469
00:23:04,440 --> 00:23:06,600
Speaker 1: You know where some are better with it than others.

470
00:23:07,440 --> 00:23:11,920
Speaker 5: I mean, I think when they're little, it's obviously it's.

471
00:23:11,720 --> 00:23:13,040
Speaker 3: Better because they don't get it.

472
00:23:13,320 --> 00:23:14,480
Speaker 2: Yeah, and yeah, I.

473
00:23:14,480 --> 00:23:17,120
Speaker 3: Mean they go through phases. But I think that the more.

474
00:23:18,680 --> 00:23:21,959
Speaker 5: We stay together and understand it and talk about the

475
00:23:22,000 --> 00:23:25,119
Speaker 5: business of the clicks and selling the advertising and the

476
00:23:25,160 --> 00:23:29,280
Speaker 5: clickbait and really what that is and they can understand

477
00:23:29,320 --> 00:23:29,639
Speaker 5: helped me.

478
00:23:29,760 --> 00:23:30,879
Speaker 3: I don't got to understand it.

479
00:23:31,280 --> 00:23:34,080
Speaker 5: You know, when people told me I was good clickbait,

480
00:23:34,080 --> 00:23:34,879
Speaker 5: I was like, what is that?

481
00:23:34,920 --> 00:23:36,919
Speaker 3: Even those first time I even heard this thing.

482
00:23:37,040 --> 00:23:40,960
Speaker 5: Like No, So you're somebody that you know, in a

483
00:23:41,040 --> 00:23:43,640
Speaker 5: community of a lot of people that when they put

484
00:23:43,680 --> 00:23:45,640
Speaker 5: something about you, they know that they're going to click

485
00:23:45,640 --> 00:23:47,480
Speaker 5: on it, and when they click on it, that generates

486
00:23:47,560 --> 00:23:49,679
Speaker 5: ads and it's just like ends up being this whole

487
00:23:50,200 --> 00:23:53,760
Speaker 5: whole thing, and it just helps you to understand it.

488
00:23:53,800 --> 00:23:56,439
Speaker 5: I think the system a little bit more. But I

489
00:23:56,480 --> 00:24:00,879
Speaker 5: think it's just something that hopefully they will be able

490
00:24:00,920 --> 00:24:03,159
Speaker 5: to separate from and say, that's the choices that these

491
00:24:03,160 --> 00:24:04,760
Speaker 5: people are making over here, and I'm going to go

492
00:24:04,800 --> 00:24:06,840
Speaker 5: onto my life. I think doing the reality show was

493
00:24:06,920 --> 00:24:11,679
Speaker 5: very helpful to us. Yeah, I gave us it was

494
00:24:11,760 --> 00:24:14,920
Speaker 5: very cathartic, and I think it gave us the ability

495
00:24:14,960 --> 00:24:17,560
Speaker 5: to speak when we were told not to mm hmm.

496
00:24:18,040 --> 00:24:22,280
Speaker 5: And I think speaking and continuing on even if you

497
00:24:22,320 --> 00:24:24,080
Speaker 5: know when we're filming, it was in private. It was

498
00:24:24,080 --> 00:24:26,720
Speaker 5: in a private place with with these people who we trusted,

499
00:24:27,520 --> 00:24:30,720
Speaker 5: who we do trust of obviously they're wonderful people they

500
00:24:30,760 --> 00:24:35,800
Speaker 5: we I think that was that was very very life

501
00:24:35,800 --> 00:24:36,679
Speaker 5: saving for us.

502
00:24:36,840 --> 00:24:37,359
Speaker 2: Oh cool.

503
00:24:37,440 --> 00:24:40,119
Speaker 1: This is interesting to talk about, honestly because you you

504
00:24:40,720 --> 00:24:45,359
Speaker 1: I think from a just uh from a standpoint of

505
00:24:45,520 --> 00:24:51,680
Speaker 1: watching someone expose their lives on television, you know, the

506
00:24:51,720 --> 00:24:54,760
Speaker 1: perception is is that one is doing that for some

507
00:24:54,840 --> 00:24:58,879
Speaker 1: sort of notoriety. But there's a there's another you know,

508
00:24:58,880 --> 00:25:01,119
Speaker 1: there's another level to it. There's depth to it, you know,

509
00:25:01,240 --> 00:25:04,439
Speaker 1: especially for someone like you, family like you guys who

510
00:25:04,520 --> 00:25:07,680
Speaker 1: have been so exposed without consent.

511
00:25:08,119 --> 00:25:11,000
Speaker 2: Yes, and so now it's it's your time.

512
00:25:11,320 --> 00:25:13,720
Speaker 5: It's interesting that you bring up that word because and

513
00:25:13,840 --> 00:25:15,840
Speaker 5: I don't. I don't have any I can't speak to

514
00:25:15,880 --> 00:25:18,880
Speaker 5: other reality shows. I don't watch a lot of reality shows.

515
00:25:19,640 --> 00:25:21,919
Speaker 5: I'm tired, I go to bed. I don't like actually

516
00:25:22,240 --> 00:25:22,600
Speaker 5: do much.

517
00:25:22,640 --> 00:25:25,440
Speaker 3: I'm very boring. Sometimes it was like turn off.

518
00:25:25,800 --> 00:25:30,960
Speaker 5: But I so our show runners, Sarah Ready, when we

519
00:25:32,359 --> 00:25:35,879
Speaker 5: met in person for the first time, we sat on

520
00:25:35,920 --> 00:25:37,400
Speaker 5: the rug in my in my living room.

521
00:25:37,480 --> 00:25:40,640
Speaker 3: She said, the most important word of the.

522
00:25:40,600 --> 00:25:46,080
Speaker 5: Season is consent. And I didn't really, you know, understand

523
00:25:46,200 --> 00:25:47,800
Speaker 5: anything about reality job. And I was like, I don't

524
00:25:47,800 --> 00:25:49,520
Speaker 5: think that was the word that I would have gone

525
00:25:49,560 --> 00:25:51,880
Speaker 5: to at that word that is the most important word,

526
00:25:52,240 --> 00:25:55,560
Speaker 5: And she said yes, especially with the children, we always

527
00:25:55,680 --> 00:26:00,639
Speaker 5: ask consent before we film, so much so to the

528
00:26:00,640 --> 00:26:04,159
Speaker 5: point where Raphai or eldest, he'll notice he's not in

529
00:26:04,240 --> 00:26:08,000
Speaker 5: it that much because we didn't have it like he

530
00:26:08,119 --> 00:26:10,000
Speaker 5: was like no, I mean I don't want you, or

531
00:26:10,000 --> 00:26:11,520
Speaker 5: he would leave, and it was just very much even

532
00:26:11,520 --> 00:26:14,679
Speaker 5: if they didn't want to actually say it, he would,

533
00:26:14,720 --> 00:26:16,359
Speaker 5: you know, just kind of have his own space. And

534
00:26:16,840 --> 00:26:20,840
Speaker 5: there's a tremendous sense of feeling people's energy on the

535
00:26:20,920 --> 00:26:23,840
Speaker 5: set and he will watch it now and he's like,

536
00:26:24,200 --> 00:26:25,040
Speaker 5: why am I not in this?

537
00:26:25,240 --> 00:26:26,520
Speaker 3: I'm like, because we had consent.

538
00:26:26,880 --> 00:26:29,320
Speaker 2: And he was like, he's like, why am I not

539
00:26:29,480 --> 00:26:30,320
Speaker 2: at this point?

540
00:26:30,440 --> 00:26:32,040
Speaker 3: And I was like, because that wasn't the place that

541
00:26:32,040 --> 00:26:34,240
Speaker 3: you were in right now, right at that point. But no,

542
00:26:34,400 --> 00:26:35,200
Speaker 3: it was very much.

543
00:26:35,240 --> 00:26:35,439
Speaker 1: You know.

544
00:26:35,920 --> 00:26:37,760
Speaker 5: One of the reasons that she told me that is

545
00:26:37,800 --> 00:26:40,480
Speaker 5: she said, when you want to get true, you don't

546
00:26:40,520 --> 00:26:40,840
Speaker 5: want to.

547
00:26:40,760 --> 00:26:42,240
Speaker 3: Put somebody in fight or flight.

548
00:26:43,760 --> 00:26:46,320
Speaker 5: You want to put them in a place calm and

549
00:26:46,359 --> 00:26:49,800
Speaker 5: then they can be authentic and share with you. And

550
00:26:49,840 --> 00:26:52,440
Speaker 5: so I think that that's why the show feels so authentic.

551
00:26:52,560 --> 00:26:55,480
Speaker 5: I think this is why this book is so authentic,

552
00:26:55,680 --> 00:26:58,080
Speaker 5: is because it's consent.

553
00:26:58,760 --> 00:27:01,719
Speaker 3: It's I'm sharing with you, and I'm a very open person,

554
00:27:02,280 --> 00:27:04,240
Speaker 3: you know. I lunch. I love that. That's why I

555
00:27:04,240 --> 00:27:05,439
Speaker 3: love to teach yoga. You know.

556
00:27:05,520 --> 00:27:07,960
Speaker 5: I get to meet a whole other person and we

557
00:27:08,000 --> 00:27:11,200
Speaker 5: get to share something together and maybe maybe your life

558
00:27:11,280 --> 00:27:12,760
Speaker 5: is going to get this much better. My life is

559
00:27:12,760 --> 00:27:15,280
Speaker 5: going to get this much better, even just our energy

560
00:27:15,320 --> 00:27:18,960
Speaker 5: is connecting. I love that, and so that's what I

561
00:27:19,000 --> 00:27:20,680
Speaker 5: want to continue on. You know, even though I don't

562
00:27:20,680 --> 00:27:22,520
Speaker 5: teach as much yoga anymore. I want to bring that

563
00:27:22,560 --> 00:27:25,240
Speaker 5: into all areas of my life. Mm hmm.

564
00:27:25,640 --> 00:27:27,720
Speaker 1: I mean, did you know what you were signing up for?

565
00:27:27,960 --> 00:27:29,959
Speaker 1: You know, you fell in love and you just met

566
00:27:30,000 --> 00:27:33,560
Speaker 1: a man, and you know who's handsome and fun and

567
00:27:33,680 --> 00:27:36,399
Speaker 1: funny as shit by the way, and talented is all

568
00:27:36,760 --> 00:27:37,399
Speaker 1: get up.

569
00:27:37,280 --> 00:27:40,439
Speaker 2: And then you're like, whoa shit, this is not what

570
00:27:40,480 --> 00:27:41,520
Speaker 2: I signed up for.

571
00:27:42,600 --> 00:27:45,359
Speaker 5: Well, I mean, I don't think when I mean, I

572
00:27:45,440 --> 00:27:47,399
Speaker 5: don't know how people at home who are listening to

573
00:27:47,440 --> 00:27:51,359
Speaker 5: this field, but like I never thought with anyone I

574
00:27:51,440 --> 00:27:56,040
Speaker 5: was dating, like I'm signing up for XYZ right, like,

575
00:27:56,160 --> 00:27:58,000
Speaker 5: regardless of what their profession is.

576
00:27:58,080 --> 00:28:00,000
Speaker 3: Like, I'm not like, oh, doing this is signing up

577
00:28:00,240 --> 00:28:00,800
Speaker 3: to be whatever.

578
00:28:00,920 --> 00:28:03,960
Speaker 5: I mean, I think that politics has like a separate

579
00:28:04,000 --> 00:28:08,040
Speaker 5: thing over there, but every other profession I don't understand,

580
00:28:08,080 --> 00:28:09,160
Speaker 5: like thinking.

581
00:28:08,920 --> 00:28:11,159
Speaker 3: You know, when you're starting to date somebody that you're signing.

582
00:28:10,920 --> 00:28:14,399
Speaker 5: Up for something, but so no, And I also, you

583
00:28:14,440 --> 00:28:18,439
Speaker 5: know the reality show we just said okay, And I

584
00:28:18,480 --> 00:28:21,320
Speaker 5: do a lot of things without thinking them through sometimes,

585
00:28:22,680 --> 00:28:25,600
Speaker 5: which I think is you know, it's a little impulsive,

586
00:28:25,600 --> 00:28:28,320
Speaker 5: but it's also very spontaneous. Then you know, I'm here

587
00:28:28,359 --> 00:28:30,720
Speaker 5: to try things and stuff like that. So you know,

588
00:28:30,760 --> 00:28:33,359
Speaker 5: I mean, I was just trying it out. This wasn't

589
00:28:33,400 --> 00:28:35,399
Speaker 5: like somebody came with a contract and was like, this

590
00:28:35,560 --> 00:28:36,439
Speaker 5: is what it's going to be.

591
00:28:37,200 --> 00:28:38,840
Speaker 3: Also, you know, I.

592
00:28:38,520 --> 00:28:46,800
Speaker 5: Grew up not watching TV, and I.

593
00:28:44,640 --> 00:28:46,680
Speaker 3: I still don't really watch TV to.

594
00:28:46,640 --> 00:28:50,920
Speaker 5: This day, and I think that therefore I wasn't really

595
00:28:51,040 --> 00:28:56,480
Speaker 5: aware as much of that world. Of course I knew

596
00:28:56,520 --> 00:29:00,840
Speaker 5: he was famous. Of course I didn't understand. I don't

597
00:29:00,840 --> 00:29:04,360
Speaker 5: think anyone cooked, but especially I think because I was

598
00:29:04,360 --> 00:29:06,280
Speaker 5: so far removed and I was just teaching yoga all

599
00:29:06,320 --> 00:29:09,360
Speaker 5: the time. Yeah, oh but I didn't. Yeah, I didn't

600
00:29:09,360 --> 00:29:12,040
Speaker 5: really understand what people say, Oh, you sign up for it,

601
00:29:12,080 --> 00:29:14,360
Speaker 5: what comes with that? You know, you're asking for it?

602
00:29:14,400 --> 00:29:16,600
Speaker 5: All of these like really wonderful things to hear, and I'm.

603
00:29:16,440 --> 00:29:18,320
Speaker 3: Like, no, I know, I didn't.

604
00:29:19,160 --> 00:29:21,920
Speaker 1: How do you deal with that, like like the scrutiny,

605
00:29:22,080 --> 00:29:23,640
Speaker 1: you know what I mean, and the press and all

606
00:29:23,680 --> 00:29:26,960
Speaker 1: the shit that goes down. You know, you get calloused

607
00:29:27,080 --> 00:29:29,120
Speaker 1: to it, you know, you start to understand a little

608
00:29:29,160 --> 00:29:32,120
Speaker 1: bit better and it doesn't really affect you, or I'm

609
00:29:32,120 --> 00:29:32,760
Speaker 1: not speaking for you.

610
00:29:32,760 --> 00:29:34,600
Speaker 2: I'm saying maybe generally, But.

611
00:29:34,680 --> 00:29:37,560
Speaker 1: The first couple of times where you're like, I didn't

612
00:29:37,560 --> 00:29:40,840
Speaker 1: do anything, Like why are you? Why is everyone so angry?

613
00:29:40,880 --> 00:29:42,160
Speaker 1: I mean, how were you.

614
00:29:42,200 --> 00:29:44,440
Speaker 2: Able to sort of deal with that?

615
00:29:44,440 --> 00:29:46,760
Speaker 1: Did you have a natural capacity to sort of say, hey,

616
00:29:46,800 --> 00:29:47,600
Speaker 1: you know, what's screw it?

617
00:29:48,440 --> 00:29:51,680
Speaker 3: No? I wish, I wish. I feel like sometimes I'm

618
00:29:51,680 --> 00:29:53,040
Speaker 3: developing that a little bit more.

619
00:29:53,080 --> 00:29:55,920
Speaker 2: I think people did it hurt It was hurtful.

620
00:29:56,160 --> 00:29:57,280
Speaker 3: It is hurtful.

621
00:29:57,320 --> 00:29:59,280
Speaker 5: I mean, I'm somebody I'm like, hey, let's all, let's

622
00:29:59,280 --> 00:30:02,200
Speaker 5: all be together. Was like, be like happy and together,

623
00:30:02,280 --> 00:30:03,800
Speaker 5: Like why are we doing this? I would never do

624
00:30:03,880 --> 00:30:04,560
Speaker 5: this to anyone.

625
00:30:04,960 --> 00:30:06,160
Speaker 3: Why are you going to do it to me?

626
00:30:07,640 --> 00:30:10,480
Speaker 5: But I mean, I'm a pretty defiant person, and I

627
00:30:11,280 --> 00:30:13,720
Speaker 5: you know, I have I've been talking about recently. I

628
00:30:13,760 --> 00:30:17,480
Speaker 5: have ADHD, and I will like hyper focus on certain things,

629
00:30:17,480 --> 00:30:19,760
Speaker 5: and I'll like and I'm also extremely literal.

630
00:30:20,120 --> 00:30:23,200
Speaker 1: Yeah, sorry interrupt. But we just had a guy, you know,

631
00:30:23,320 --> 00:30:24,400
Speaker 1: a doctor who is.

632
00:30:24,360 --> 00:30:26,920
Speaker 3: Like a prominent now I saw we left him.

633
00:30:27,160 --> 00:30:28,400
Speaker 2: Oh he's so great.

634
00:30:29,120 --> 00:30:32,760
Speaker 1: And because because I didn't know, I've never been diagnosed

635
00:30:32,840 --> 00:30:35,200
Speaker 1: or anything, but it just feels like my brain is

636
00:30:35,240 --> 00:30:37,520
Speaker 1: a little weird and I'm a creative and and he

637
00:30:37,680 --> 00:30:40,440
Speaker 1: was explaining how a lot of creatives are just naturally

638
00:30:40,440 --> 00:30:41,840
Speaker 1: they have add ADHD.

639
00:30:42,360 --> 00:30:44,080
Speaker 2: But the way he reframed it as a.

640
00:30:44,040 --> 00:30:47,480
Speaker 1: Superpower and not something that's stabilitating, you know what I mean?

641
00:30:47,680 --> 00:30:50,560
Speaker 3: Yeah, which I love because growing up it was not

642
00:30:50,720 --> 00:30:51,600
Speaker 3: a superpower.

643
00:30:51,760 --> 00:30:54,640
Speaker 5: Yeah, you know, there was not anywhere near or one

644
00:30:54,640 --> 00:30:58,400
Speaker 5: of our kids is I diagnosed with ADHD. And and

645
00:30:58,880 --> 00:31:01,760
Speaker 5: it was only then and that I started realizing that this.

646
00:31:01,800 --> 00:31:09,880
Speaker 3: Is a whole new world of I think, you know, information, understanding, celebration.

647
00:31:10,000 --> 00:31:12,360
Speaker 5: I mean I don't want to, you know, it's there

648
00:31:12,360 --> 00:31:17,080
Speaker 5: are things that I know that me and many other

649
00:31:17,120 --> 00:31:22,480
Speaker 5: people I know who we're wired very similarly. It helps us,

650
00:31:23,000 --> 00:31:25,640
Speaker 5: you know, And it is being creative, it is being spontaneous.

651
00:31:25,760 --> 00:31:29,400
Speaker 3: It's really thinking about things in a completely different way.

652
00:31:30,000 --> 00:31:32,680
Speaker 5: There's a resilience because I think people sometimes who have

653
00:31:32,880 --> 00:31:35,400
Speaker 5: who struggle, you know, some of the best teachers that

654
00:31:35,480 --> 00:31:39,000
Speaker 5: you can have troubled so much in their life. People

655
00:31:39,080 --> 00:31:40,880
Speaker 5: things just come like this to them. I mean they're like,

656
00:31:40,920 --> 00:31:43,239
Speaker 5: why don't you get it too? But people who had

657
00:31:43,280 --> 00:31:47,120
Speaker 5: to like really figure it out and struggle and know

658
00:31:47,200 --> 00:31:50,520
Speaker 5: how hard it is come to conveying information to another

659
00:31:50,560 --> 00:31:51,760
Speaker 5: person with real empathy.

660
00:31:52,000 --> 00:31:54,600
Speaker 3: So no that I was very happy. I was. I

661
00:31:54,640 --> 00:31:58,160
Speaker 3: was doing my research before you had him on, and

662
00:31:58,240 --> 00:31:58,920
Speaker 3: I love him.

663
00:31:59,280 --> 00:32:00,800
Speaker 2: Yeah, it was awesome.

664
00:32:01,920 --> 00:32:04,360
Speaker 5: Yeah, the whole idea about putting glasses on, and that

665
00:32:04,560 --> 00:32:08,880
Speaker 5: is really really true, you know. And it's not you know,

666
00:32:09,320 --> 00:32:11,800
Speaker 5: just medication which works for some people and doesn't work

667
00:32:11,800 --> 00:32:12,400
Speaker 5: for other people.

668
00:32:12,680 --> 00:32:15,840
Speaker 3: But it's just an understanding. You know, all go on tangents.

669
00:32:16,480 --> 00:32:19,000
Speaker 5: And now that I can understand this stuff a little

670
00:32:19,000 --> 00:32:22,120
Speaker 5: bit better, I then will like catch myself going on

671
00:32:22,200 --> 00:32:23,960
Speaker 5: a tangent and I'll be like, okay.

672
00:32:24,520 --> 00:32:28,920
Speaker 3: Bring it all over, plan the plane exactly.

673
00:32:31,360 --> 00:32:32,800
Speaker 2: No, I know, I know, but it is.

674
00:32:32,840 --> 00:32:36,960
Speaker 1: It is interesting what happens when you are able to

675
00:32:37,320 --> 00:32:42,200
Speaker 1: look at it as something positive, you know, even even

676
00:32:42,360 --> 00:32:45,640
Speaker 1: just that feeling and that thought, It just changes the

677
00:32:45,640 --> 00:32:49,160
Speaker 1: way that you feel and think immediately, yeah.

678
00:32:48,760 --> 00:32:51,760
Speaker 5: Well it's feeling valuable rather than like the stupid one

679
00:32:51,800 --> 00:32:52,200
Speaker 5: in class.

680
00:32:52,240 --> 00:32:52,440
Speaker 1: Yeah.

681
00:32:52,480 --> 00:32:54,480
Speaker 2: And you also just give yourselves a little grace. You're

682
00:32:54,480 --> 00:32:56,920
Speaker 2: just like, oh wait, yeah.

683
00:32:56,680 --> 00:32:59,720
Speaker 5: And then telling people, you know, I think being able

684
00:32:59,760 --> 00:33:03,560
Speaker 5: to to people like I Also, I also have dyslexia,

685
00:33:03,600 --> 00:33:05,680
Speaker 5: and I'm like, not a great reader.

686
00:33:06,840 --> 00:33:08,719
Speaker 3: I've been read pretty well in my head. But then

687
00:33:08,760 --> 00:33:09,920
Speaker 3: I also realized.

688
00:33:09,560 --> 00:33:11,680
Speaker 5: That I'm like switching things and I like think that

689
00:33:11,720 --> 00:33:14,280
Speaker 5: it means one thing and actually means the opposite because

690
00:33:14,320 --> 00:33:16,800
Speaker 5: I realized there was a note in there or something

691
00:33:16,840 --> 00:33:20,360
Speaker 5: that completely changes everything. But and I did the audio

692
00:33:20,360 --> 00:33:23,640
Speaker 5: book for my books, so you can imagine how yea

693
00:33:24,360 --> 00:33:26,800
Speaker 5: the veriest scariest things for me, and I like came

694
00:33:26,800 --> 00:33:28,720
Speaker 5: in like apologizing. I'm like, I just want you to

695
00:33:28,760 --> 00:33:31,719
Speaker 5: know that, like I'm not the best like alloud reader.

696
00:33:32,120 --> 00:33:33,920
Speaker 5: And they were so lovely and they actually told me

697
00:33:33,960 --> 00:33:38,320
Speaker 5: that a lot of people in this field of you know,

698
00:33:38,840 --> 00:33:40,600
Speaker 5: I don't like to call myself a celebrity body in

699
00:33:40,680 --> 00:33:44,640
Speaker 5: like those that genre public figure books or whatever were books,

700
00:33:45,560 --> 00:33:48,040
Speaker 5: they actually also are very say a lot of them

701
00:33:48,360 --> 00:33:53,520
Speaker 5: have these little little differences that that I have. So

702
00:33:53,520 --> 00:33:55,720
Speaker 5: so anyway, they were really like lovely in featient with

703
00:33:55,760 --> 00:33:59,120
Speaker 5: me and and but but yeah, I'm so grateful that

704
00:33:59,160 --> 00:34:00,320
Speaker 5: people are talking about it now.

705
00:34:00,360 --> 00:34:02,400
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, we'll talk about the book, talk about the

706
00:34:02,400 --> 00:34:05,440
Speaker 1: inspiration behind it, you know how this all came about.

707
00:34:06,680 --> 00:34:11,279
Speaker 5: So I I mean, I guess maybe maybe I'm learning.

708
00:34:11,360 --> 00:34:14,120
Speaker 5: I'm doing a therapy session right now, because you know,

709
00:34:14,200 --> 00:34:15,400
Speaker 5: I agreed to do.

710
00:34:16,640 --> 00:34:19,040
Speaker 3: I know I'm going on a tangent noticing seeing.

711
00:34:18,880 --> 00:34:21,839
Speaker 1: I love it, by the way, I'm a tangent motherfucker,

712
00:34:21,920 --> 00:34:24,880
Speaker 1: Like I go.

713
00:34:23,880 --> 00:34:24,480
Speaker 3: That will be good.

714
00:34:24,920 --> 00:34:25,360
Speaker 2: Yeah.

715
00:34:26,160 --> 00:34:29,520
Speaker 3: The we agreed to do.

716
00:34:29,560 --> 00:34:31,920
Speaker 5: The reality show without thinking about it, and we started

717
00:34:31,920 --> 00:34:36,719
Speaker 5: filming it two weeks before the trial started, which is

718
00:34:36,800 --> 00:34:38,600
Speaker 5: just like I look back and I'm like, like, I

719
00:34:38,600 --> 00:34:41,240
Speaker 5: didn't think it's what was thinking. I didn't really realize

720
00:34:41,239 --> 00:34:45,520
Speaker 5: the time frame until like it came time and I

721
00:34:45,560 --> 00:34:46,800
Speaker 5: was just like, oh my god.

722
00:34:46,800 --> 00:34:48,120
Speaker 3: This was like what are we going to do now

723
00:34:48,160 --> 00:34:49,680
Speaker 3: that we not film the rest of it? If he

724
00:34:49,760 --> 00:34:51,239
Speaker 3: goes to jail? Like what am we supposed to do?

725
00:34:51,440 --> 00:34:55,960
Speaker 5: Was really really so I actually started writing this book

726
00:34:56,440 --> 00:35:01,080
Speaker 5: right after, right after the trige happened.

727
00:35:01,640 --> 00:35:04,759
Speaker 1: And I was there, I was I was shooting a

728
00:35:04,800 --> 00:35:06,520
Speaker 1: TV show in New Mexico.

729
00:35:07,200 --> 00:35:07,920
Speaker 3: Really were you?

730
00:35:08,360 --> 00:35:08,600
Speaker 2: Yeah?

731
00:35:08,680 --> 00:35:13,040
Speaker 5: It was just an awful, tragic project time and I

732
00:35:13,840 --> 00:35:18,120
Speaker 5: but I think that, you know, this book helped me

733
00:35:18,600 --> 00:35:26,360
Speaker 5: very much get be a better person, parent, partner because

734
00:35:26,440 --> 00:35:28,759
Speaker 5: it was almost like a journal that I could be,

735
00:35:28,960 --> 00:35:33,720
Speaker 5: that I could be doing, and it really started to connect.

736
00:35:33,760 --> 00:35:37,759
Speaker 5: It was just basically like thought vomit for years because

737
00:35:37,800 --> 00:35:39,799
Speaker 5: every I mean I had a baby during this you

738
00:35:39,800 --> 00:35:41,120
Speaker 5: know what I mean like there was like there was

739
00:35:41,640 --> 00:35:44,640
Speaker 5: this so much stuff happened during the course of writing

740
00:35:44,640 --> 00:35:47,960
Speaker 5: this book. And you know, I'm a because I'm a

741
00:35:48,080 --> 00:35:54,520
Speaker 5: very open person and very unfiltered. I I a lot

742
00:35:54,560 --> 00:35:56,560
Speaker 5: of it was kind of you know, after the trial,

743
00:35:56,600 --> 00:36:01,480
Speaker 5: it really sat down and I it all came together

744
00:36:01,880 --> 00:36:04,399
Speaker 5: and I would do like ten pages a day, which

745
00:36:04,400 --> 00:36:07,879
Speaker 5: for me, somebody like made us a lot. And it

746
00:36:08,040 --> 00:36:11,960
Speaker 5: was that just like I know now what to say,

747
00:36:12,480 --> 00:36:17,280
Speaker 5: whereas I could put feeling, but these is I knew

748
00:36:17,280 --> 00:36:20,160
Speaker 5: what to say in this in this time, or at

749
00:36:20,239 --> 00:36:20,839
Speaker 5: least I hope.

750
00:36:20,840 --> 00:36:22,960
Speaker 3: I hope I said the right things.

751
00:36:23,400 --> 00:36:27,319
Speaker 5: And I also think that, you know, leaning into you know,

752
00:36:27,400 --> 00:36:31,520
Speaker 5: my mi neurodivergence. It is written in very like little

753
00:36:32,360 --> 00:36:35,239
Speaker 5: you know, pieces, a little stories, and that helps me

754
00:36:35,280 --> 00:36:40,239
Speaker 5: as well, because I struggle sometimes with just connect doing

755
00:36:40,280 --> 00:36:44,440
Speaker 5: that seamless storytelling and connecting things where I can.

756
00:36:44,560 --> 00:36:47,640
Speaker 3: Hear here here, here, here, that all works sense here.

757
00:36:48,640 --> 00:36:54,880
Speaker 5: So it is written very much in in my.

758
00:36:53,640 --> 00:36:56,120
Speaker 3: My voice because I wrote it in the way that I.

759
00:36:55,960 --> 00:36:59,120
Speaker 5: Think as well the structure of it, and I hope

760
00:36:59,120 --> 00:37:01,520
Speaker 5: that I shared stories that feel, you know, even though

761
00:37:01,520 --> 00:37:05,360
Speaker 5: I've had extraordinarily unrelatable things happen to me in my life.

762
00:37:05,360 --> 00:37:08,640
Speaker 5: But I think that the themes are hopefully things that

763
00:37:08,840 --> 00:37:10,200
Speaker 5: you know, Yeah, I.

764
00:37:10,120 --> 00:37:10,640
Speaker 2: Don't think that.

765
00:37:10,840 --> 00:37:13,239
Speaker 1: I think that that sells yourself a little short as

766
00:37:13,320 --> 00:37:16,879
Speaker 1: far as unrelatable goes, because that's just I think there again,

767
00:37:16,920 --> 00:37:18,840
Speaker 1: there is a perception of someone who is in the

768
00:37:18,840 --> 00:37:24,520
Speaker 1: public eye, who does have you know, fortune, who does

769
00:37:24,600 --> 00:37:27,719
Speaker 1: have some fame, that they don't feel anything that they

770
00:37:27,719 --> 00:37:30,480
Speaker 1: don't have the same sort of you know, issues and

771
00:37:31,040 --> 00:37:36,200
Speaker 1: hardships and afflictions that that everyone else has and and.

772
00:37:36,120 --> 00:37:39,000
Speaker 2: So we're not allowed to talk about it. There's pain

773
00:37:39,120 --> 00:37:39,680
Speaker 2: in all.

774
00:37:39,520 --> 00:37:44,239
Speaker 1: Of us, right, absolutely, there's relatability in all of our pain.

775
00:37:44,840 --> 00:37:47,800
Speaker 5: You know, yes, yeah, no, And I'm a strong believer

776
00:37:47,880 --> 00:37:52,320
Speaker 5: that if whoever is listening is going to come into

777
00:37:52,400 --> 00:37:57,279
Speaker 5: it either wanting to see humanity or not.

778
00:37:57,640 --> 00:37:58,520
Speaker 3: And then there you go.

779
00:37:58,840 --> 00:38:01,839
Speaker 5: But I hope and I do think that you know,

780
00:38:01,880 --> 00:38:06,200
Speaker 5: whether it is silly parenting stories that I share, or

781
00:38:07,600 --> 00:38:10,920
Speaker 5: you know, issues that Alec and I have had in

782
00:38:10,960 --> 00:38:14,440
Speaker 5: our relationship, or tremendous tragedy.

783
00:38:14,239 --> 00:38:17,560
Speaker 3: Or becoming a mother, you know, losing.

784
00:38:17,520 --> 00:38:22,200
Speaker 5: Pregnancies, these are things that you know, everybody unfortunately knows

785
00:38:22,239 --> 00:38:25,800
Speaker 5: what it's like to experience a tragedy. There are are

786
00:38:25,800 --> 00:38:28,480
Speaker 5: our version of it might be different, but the overall,

787
00:38:29,160 --> 00:38:33,240
Speaker 5: you know, theme is tragedy. The overall theme is problems

788
00:38:33,239 --> 00:38:36,239
Speaker 5: in marriage overall theme. And I think the reason that

789
00:38:36,280 --> 00:38:41,160
Speaker 5: I wanted to share was because it's people sharing with

790
00:38:41,280 --> 00:38:44,560
Speaker 5: me that helped me get through my hard times. You know,

791
00:38:44,880 --> 00:38:47,879
Speaker 5: I think when people come up to me and they'll

792
00:38:47,880 --> 00:38:53,400
Speaker 5: say something very kind, I always want to tell them,

793
00:38:53,560 --> 00:38:56,920
Speaker 5: you know, I'm so grateful for that, and I'm able

794
00:38:56,960 --> 00:39:00,000
Speaker 5: to do these things and you know, be this person

795
00:39:00,120 --> 00:39:02,080
Speaker 5: because other people have inspired me.

796
00:39:11,520 --> 00:39:14,920
Speaker 1: The idea is, we're hearing all of your stories. We're

797
00:39:14,920 --> 00:39:17,640
Speaker 1: getting a little snapshort of your life. We're hearing it

798
00:39:17,680 --> 00:39:21,800
Speaker 1: in your voice, and you know, very digestible chunks.

799
00:39:22,160 --> 00:39:25,440
Speaker 2: So it's not this reflowing sort of book.

800
00:39:26,360 --> 00:39:32,759
Speaker 1: And it's basically the idea is is I thought that

801
00:39:32,880 --> 00:39:35,600
Speaker 1: I knew you have this idea of how to go

802
00:39:35,719 --> 00:39:40,160
Speaker 1: about something, but until you're in it, you really don't know.

803
00:39:41,080 --> 00:39:43,840
Speaker 2: You know, there is no manual like you think that.

804
00:39:43,719 --> 00:39:45,440
Speaker 1: There's an okay when I have kids, this is how

805
00:39:45,480 --> 00:39:47,800
Speaker 1: I'm going to feel when I get married, this is

806
00:39:47,840 --> 00:39:50,680
Speaker 1: how it's going to be, you know, and it's just

807
00:39:50,880 --> 00:39:52,440
Speaker 1: never what you think it is.

808
00:39:52,880 --> 00:39:57,080
Speaker 5: Yeah, no, exactly, and being open and curious and self

809
00:39:57,080 --> 00:40:00,280
Speaker 5: forgiving of when you know when you get it wrong,

810
00:40:00,400 --> 00:40:04,279
Speaker 5: and you know, not beating myself up, feeling sometimes like

811
00:40:04,360 --> 00:40:07,520
Speaker 5: I let myself down, you know, I let somebody get

812
00:40:07,560 --> 00:40:08,480
Speaker 5: to me, and I'm like, oh.

813
00:40:08,640 --> 00:40:09,600
Speaker 3: Told that myself.

814
00:40:09,600 --> 00:40:12,399
Speaker 5: I would never let that happen again, you know, I mean,

815
00:40:12,480 --> 00:40:14,440
Speaker 5: these are this is is just a human but and

816
00:40:14,480 --> 00:40:17,000
Speaker 5: it's also you know the question that you asked me

817
00:40:17,080 --> 00:40:19,920
Speaker 5: before about, you know, was I prepared for any of

818
00:40:19,960 --> 00:40:24,000
Speaker 5: this what I was signing up for? And that's you know,

819
00:40:24,160 --> 00:40:28,640
Speaker 5: I really wanted nothing to do with this business.

820
00:40:29,760 --> 00:40:31,400
Speaker 3: That now I very much enjoy.

821
00:40:31,480 --> 00:40:33,279
Speaker 5: As much as we talk about the negative things, there's

822
00:40:33,320 --> 00:40:36,680
Speaker 5: so much amazing things about this business. There's so much

823
00:40:37,000 --> 00:40:37,800
Speaker 5: and I really.

824
00:40:37,680 --> 00:40:41,160
Speaker 3: Am so grateful for it, and I've really enjoyed myself.

825
00:40:41,400 --> 00:40:45,919
Speaker 5: But you know, there is you know, I was very

826
00:40:45,960 --> 00:40:48,480
Speaker 5: frightened of it at the beginning. I didn't really know

827
00:40:48,719 --> 00:40:53,520
Speaker 5: anything I was getting into. And I remember that I

828
00:40:53,560 --> 00:40:56,440
Speaker 5: was encouraged once we got I think that's when we're

829
00:40:56,440 --> 00:41:00,560
Speaker 5: getting engaged to do a piece with extra then that

830
00:41:00,760 --> 00:41:03,680
Speaker 5: I worked for for many years afterwards, because I became

831
00:41:03,680 --> 00:41:05,879
Speaker 5: friendly with them, and they basically said, if you give

832
00:41:05,960 --> 00:41:10,279
Speaker 5: this story, then everybody will leave you alone. And that's

833
00:41:10,320 --> 00:41:12,440
Speaker 5: why I did the first thing. I was like, great,

834
00:41:12,520 --> 00:41:14,360
Speaker 5: I will do this and then everybody.

835
00:41:13,920 --> 00:41:15,360
Speaker 3: Will just leave me alone. I can go back to

836
00:41:15,360 --> 00:41:16,319
Speaker 3: teaching yoga and that's it.

837
00:41:16,640 --> 00:41:20,560
Speaker 5: Obviously that was not a true promise, and I also

838
00:41:20,760 --> 00:41:22,000
Speaker 5: leaned into it as well.

839
00:41:22,120 --> 00:41:24,799
Speaker 3: I'd have to take responsibility for it, but it is.

840
00:41:25,800 --> 00:41:28,319
Speaker 3: I was my initial thing.

841
00:41:28,360 --> 00:41:30,720
Speaker 5: And so you know, I look at this past fourteen

842
00:41:30,800 --> 00:41:33,160
Speaker 5: years plus that I've known Alec and a lot of

843
00:41:33,239 --> 00:41:35,839
Speaker 5: other people have been done doing the talking for me. Right,

844
00:41:36,280 --> 00:41:39,120
Speaker 5: you know, if they talk about you, they talk for you.

845
00:41:39,480 --> 00:41:42,280
Speaker 5: Sometimes it's true, sometimes it's not true. Sometimes it's positive,

846
00:41:42,320 --> 00:41:45,120
Speaker 5: sometimes it's not positive. Right, we have all of the things,

847
00:41:45,160 --> 00:41:47,880
Speaker 5: but the most important thing is that they're talking for me.

848
00:41:48,520 --> 00:41:51,319
Speaker 3: And that's where I, you know, wanted to be.

849
00:41:51,280 --> 00:41:52,640
Speaker 5: Like, you know what, I'm going to talk for myself.

850
00:41:52,680 --> 00:41:55,200
Speaker 5: So the book is I'm talking for myself. The show

851
00:41:55,280 --> 00:41:57,360
Speaker 5: is we're talking. That's my new I'm in my forties

852
00:41:58,200 --> 00:41:59,720
Speaker 5: now talking for myself.

853
00:41:59,760 --> 00:42:00,439
Speaker 3: Thank you very much.

854
00:42:00,520 --> 00:42:00,960
Speaker 2: I love that.

855
00:42:01,040 --> 00:42:05,680
Speaker 1: And then moving forward forty and on, do you have

856
00:42:06,520 --> 00:42:09,520
Speaker 1: sort of goals or aspirations of sort of how you

857
00:42:09,560 --> 00:42:12,359
Speaker 1: want to shift it or live your life, you know

858
00:42:12,360 --> 00:42:14,600
Speaker 1: what I mean, Like you're done with having kids or

859
00:42:14,640 --> 00:42:18,040
Speaker 1: so you say, right, so that's done. You know what's new?

860
00:42:18,400 --> 00:42:20,120
Speaker 1: Like is there is there a piece of you when

861
00:42:20,120 --> 00:42:22,520
Speaker 1: you turn forty? We're like, you know what this is

862
00:42:22,560 --> 00:42:23,080
Speaker 1: who I want.

863
00:42:23,000 --> 00:42:23,359
Speaker 2: To be known.

864
00:42:23,560 --> 00:42:26,200
Speaker 3: I feel like one of the gaps that people don't talk.

865
00:42:26,080 --> 00:42:27,960
Speaker 5: About very much for women. I don't know how you

866
00:42:28,000 --> 00:42:31,680
Speaker 5: feel for men, but for women is we are kids.

867
00:42:31,880 --> 00:42:35,960
Speaker 5: We you know, get educated, We're going to go to college.

868
00:42:36,160 --> 00:42:38,319
Speaker 5: And again my generation can go to college. I know

869
00:42:38,360 --> 00:42:42,439
Speaker 5: that I'm very lucky in this way to have had

870
00:42:42,480 --> 00:42:47,279
Speaker 5: that as a dream that is achievable. And them we

871
00:42:47,320 --> 00:42:50,359
Speaker 5: get married and I'm gonna have kids and then it's over. Yeah,

872
00:42:50,520 --> 00:42:52,920
Speaker 5: nobody talks about the afterpart. So that's what I'm like

873
00:42:53,040 --> 00:42:54,680
Speaker 5: in the age of discovery.

874
00:42:54,400 --> 00:42:59,919
Speaker 3: You know that right now? And I feel that there's

875
00:43:00,080 --> 00:43:02,000
Speaker 3: lot of raising to be down with these children that

876
00:43:02,080 --> 00:43:05,120
Speaker 3: I have put in right so.

877
00:43:05,280 --> 00:43:08,160
Speaker 5: We're in the raising face and I think, you know,

878
00:43:08,320 --> 00:43:11,359
Speaker 5: I think just in terms of feeling every single day,

879
00:43:12,040 --> 00:43:16,000
Speaker 5: I don't want to feel like the world is out

880
00:43:16,040 --> 00:43:18,600
Speaker 5: to get me, which has or out to get my

881
00:43:18,680 --> 00:43:22,920
Speaker 5: family which has been a dark thought that I've had

882
00:43:23,000 --> 00:43:24,280
Speaker 5: for a very long time.

883
00:43:25,600 --> 00:43:27,279
Speaker 3: And as much as I try to be positive, and

884
00:43:27,600 --> 00:43:31,360
Speaker 3: that is my vulnerable state of just oh god, they're trying,

885
00:43:31,440 --> 00:43:33,680
Speaker 3: you know. You know, we'll have.

886
00:43:34,320 --> 00:43:36,759
Speaker 5: People come up to us on the street and we're

887
00:43:36,840 --> 00:43:38,960
Speaker 5: just walking with a kid, and you know they're up

888
00:43:39,000 --> 00:43:41,160
Speaker 5: to no good and they just start streaming and like

889
00:43:41,280 --> 00:43:44,000
Speaker 5: you know, tabloid press, they're screaming stuff and they're just

890
00:43:44,040 --> 00:43:46,600
Speaker 5: trying to get a reaction, and you can go from

891
00:43:46,640 --> 00:43:49,160
Speaker 5: a sunny, beautiful day to all of a sudden they're

892
00:43:49,160 --> 00:43:51,680
Speaker 5: in your face. You weren't expecting it. Like I don't

893
00:43:51,719 --> 00:43:53,839
Speaker 5: want that anymore, and I know that I can't make

894
00:43:53,920 --> 00:43:56,000
Speaker 5: them go away. There's absolutely nothing, and I'm like they

895
00:43:56,040 --> 00:43:57,479
Speaker 5: have a teacher. I'm like, don't you see my human

896
00:43:57,520 --> 00:44:00,719
Speaker 5: and the and they're like I don't care about but

897
00:44:00,800 --> 00:44:02,840
Speaker 5: it's very painful. But if I want to try to

898
00:44:02,920 --> 00:44:06,680
Speaker 5: lean more and more into just surrounding myself by like

899
00:44:06,840 --> 00:44:09,560
Speaker 5: really good and positive people, always remembering that even when

900
00:44:09,560 --> 00:44:12,880
Speaker 5: there's negativity, there's so much more positive people and so

901
00:44:12,960 --> 00:44:16,160
Speaker 5: much more kind people. And so I just have to

902
00:44:16,239 --> 00:44:17,919
Speaker 5: lean into that more and more. And I'm the one

903
00:44:17,960 --> 00:44:19,880
Speaker 5: that has to trade that. You know, I can't expect

904
00:44:19,960 --> 00:44:21,160
Speaker 5: the world is going to do it for me.

905
00:44:21,160 --> 00:44:23,880
Speaker 2: Because they're not exactly exactly.

906
00:44:24,520 --> 00:44:27,279
Speaker 1: This is just a choice because there are things we

907
00:44:27,320 --> 00:44:32,160
Speaker 1: can control and things we can't. Obviously we you cannot

908
00:44:32,239 --> 00:44:35,000
Speaker 1: control anyone coming up to you, the way that they

909
00:44:35,040 --> 00:44:38,320
Speaker 1: feel about you, how they approach you and your family,

910
00:44:38,320 --> 00:44:42,000
Speaker 1: the disrespect, the invasion. You can't control that. The only

911
00:44:42,040 --> 00:44:45,239
Speaker 1: you control is how you react, how you react, how

912
00:44:45,239 --> 00:44:48,319
Speaker 1: you bring that in. That's it, I mean, because the

913
00:44:48,360 --> 00:44:51,080
Speaker 1: answer is not being a homebody and just fucking staying

914
00:44:51,080 --> 00:44:53,600
Speaker 1: inside all day. That's not That's not who you are,

915
00:44:54,160 --> 00:44:56,160
Speaker 1: and that's not who we are as humans. We want

916
00:44:56,160 --> 00:44:58,719
Speaker 1: to get out, we want to experience. So it's just

917
00:44:58,800 --> 00:45:01,920
Speaker 1: about sort of making the choice.

918
00:45:02,400 --> 00:45:05,440
Speaker 3: Yeah, no, it's very true, It's very true.

919
00:45:05,960 --> 00:45:09,680
Speaker 1: One more question, what do you think the biggest sort

920
00:45:09,719 --> 00:45:14,439
Speaker 1: of misconception of you is? You know, because like you

921
00:45:14,480 --> 00:45:19,520
Speaker 1: just said it, people speak for you about you, and

922
00:45:19,880 --> 00:45:25,439
Speaker 1: then it builds a perception of you that is not

923
00:45:25,520 --> 00:45:30,320
Speaker 1: necessarily true. What would you say is the biggest misconception?

924
00:45:30,920 --> 00:45:34,280
Speaker 5: I mean, I think if I were to look at

925
00:45:34,400 --> 00:45:39,719
Speaker 5: a twenty seven year old yoga instructor who was dating

926
00:45:40,040 --> 00:45:43,320
Speaker 5: a fifty three year old rich and famous man.

927
00:45:44,800 --> 00:45:47,480
Speaker 3: What would I think? Right?

928
00:45:48,120 --> 00:45:52,760
Speaker 5: And so anytime people think things about me, I try

929
00:45:52,800 --> 00:45:57,160
Speaker 5: to give them the empathy and the compassion of without

930
00:45:57,200 --> 00:45:59,719
Speaker 5: the experiences that I have.

931
00:46:00,040 --> 00:46:03,320
Speaker 3: Yeah, what would I think about somebody in my shoes?

932
00:46:03,840 --> 00:46:04,320
Speaker 2: Interesting?

933
00:46:05,000 --> 00:46:10,480
Speaker 5: And so you know, I I have zero interest in

934
00:46:10,560 --> 00:46:11,960
Speaker 5: setting records straight.

935
00:46:12,160 --> 00:46:13,960
Speaker 3: And then this and then that is like.

936
00:46:13,920 --> 00:46:15,799
Speaker 5: Again, people are gonna see you, or they're not gonna

937
00:46:15,800 --> 00:46:17,520
Speaker 5: see They're gonna like you, They're not gonna like you,

938
00:46:17,520 --> 00:46:19,040
Speaker 5: They're gonna want to take you in, or they're.

939
00:46:18,880 --> 00:46:21,839
Speaker 3: Not gonna take you in. But I think that, you know,

940
00:46:22,800 --> 00:46:28,600
Speaker 3: all I've wanted to do is belong and be who

941
00:46:28,640 --> 00:46:29,319
Speaker 3: I always am.

942
00:46:29,880 --> 00:46:34,080
Speaker 5: And you know, I enjoyed so much and start teaching

943
00:46:34,120 --> 00:46:37,000
Speaker 5: yog at five o'clock in the morning and I finished

944
00:46:37,000 --> 00:46:39,279
Speaker 5: at ten thirty pm most days, and I worked three

945
00:46:39,320 --> 00:46:41,440
Speaker 5: hundred and sixty five days out of the year and

946
00:46:41,520 --> 00:46:44,239
Speaker 5: I loved it so much, And get paid thirty five

947
00:46:44,280 --> 00:46:51,640
Speaker 5: dollars a class, and I really, you know, enjoy just

948
00:46:51,880 --> 00:46:54,600
Speaker 5: being there and helping people feel better.

949
00:46:54,840 --> 00:46:58,799
Speaker 3: And that is something that it still guides me. You know.

950
00:46:59,000 --> 00:47:02,680
Speaker 5: Again, I'm raised by I'm raised by My parents are

951
00:47:02,760 --> 00:47:06,880
Speaker 5: very hippie and I am very much a product of that.

952
00:47:07,160 --> 00:47:10,040
Speaker 3: And so I mean, I just I guess, you know,

953
00:47:10,080 --> 00:47:10,840
Speaker 3: I think that.

954
00:47:12,719 --> 00:47:16,640
Speaker 5: I have been brought into worlds that sometimes people want

955
00:47:16,680 --> 00:47:19,520
Speaker 5: to look at you as you're you know, conniving and

956
00:47:19,560 --> 00:47:22,279
Speaker 5: trying things. And you see it about other women who

957
00:47:22,360 --> 00:47:25,600
Speaker 5: start dating rich and famous men. I feel like it's

958
00:47:25,800 --> 00:47:28,359
Speaker 5: very a little different when it's a man coming in

959
00:47:29,000 --> 00:47:32,320
Speaker 5: dating a rich and famous woman, Right, it's a little different.

960
00:47:32,800 --> 00:47:35,759
Speaker 5: There's a very specific thing. And I think it's these

961
00:47:35,800 --> 00:47:38,319
Speaker 5: fairy tales that we grow up with and you know,

962
00:47:38,400 --> 00:47:39,919
Speaker 5: the prince choosing one of them.

963
00:47:40,040 --> 00:47:40,680
Speaker 3: And I think that.

964
00:47:40,680 --> 00:47:43,239
Speaker 5: It's, you know, this idea that you know, women we

965
00:47:43,480 --> 00:47:45,600
Speaker 5: sometimes feel like, you know.

966
00:47:46,719 --> 00:47:51,760
Speaker 3: Where it's it's a it's a well. You know. Sometimes

967
00:47:51,800 --> 00:47:53,640
Speaker 3: men can be like a well and we're like, okay,

968
00:47:53,640 --> 00:47:56,000
Speaker 3: we've got to get to the first to the well.

969
00:47:56,080 --> 00:48:00,160
Speaker 5: And you know, I hope that more and more we

970
00:48:00,320 --> 00:48:04,840
Speaker 5: can establish you know, equal rights where we don't have

971
00:48:05,080 --> 00:48:10,280
Speaker 5: to compete or have feel competing with each other for something.

972
00:48:10,400 --> 00:48:12,960
Speaker 5: So I don't know, I try not to read too

973
00:48:13,040 --> 00:48:16,840
Speaker 5: much about other people's opinions because you know, but I

974
00:48:16,880 --> 00:48:22,399
Speaker 5: think that I try to understand what people say and

975
00:48:23,080 --> 00:48:25,800
Speaker 5: you know, if I encourage people to read the book.

976
00:48:25,520 --> 00:48:26,239
Speaker 2: Yeah, read the book.

977
00:48:26,239 --> 00:48:27,960
Speaker 1: And I also think that you make a great point,

978
00:48:28,120 --> 00:48:30,440
Speaker 1: you know what I mean, like the fact that you

979
00:48:30,480 --> 00:48:32,920
Speaker 1: can sort of put yourself in their shoes and understand

980
00:48:32,920 --> 00:48:36,240
Speaker 1: where they're coming from and what you might think given

981
00:48:36,280 --> 00:48:37,439
Speaker 1: the fact, given that you.

982
00:48:37,400 --> 00:48:40,640
Speaker 2: Aren't who you are, right, I think that that's smart,

983
00:48:40,760 --> 00:48:40,960
Speaker 2: you know.

984
00:48:41,080 --> 00:48:43,080
Speaker 1: I think that does bring on some empathy, and it's like,

985
00:48:43,360 --> 00:48:44,879
Speaker 1: you know, they might be wrong, they might have these

986
00:48:44,880 --> 00:48:47,280
Speaker 1: opinions that are built out of something that is bullshit,

987
00:48:47,719 --> 00:48:49,560
Speaker 1: but you know, maybe I would think the same thing.

988
00:48:50,000 --> 00:48:53,120
Speaker 1: Get to know me, understand who I am, you know,

989
00:48:53,520 --> 00:48:55,400
Speaker 1: and that's that's it. And there's nothing you can do

990
00:48:55,560 --> 00:48:56,680
Speaker 1: about it except be you.

991
00:48:56,920 --> 00:48:59,520
Speaker 3: That's it exactly. And there's nothing else that I that

992
00:48:59,560 --> 00:49:01,080
Speaker 3: I want to do, you know, and I want my

993
00:49:01,200 --> 00:49:01,680
Speaker 3: kids to.

994
00:49:01,600 --> 00:49:02,279
Speaker 2: Know how to do that.

995
00:49:03,760 --> 00:49:05,400
Speaker 3: I'm just like what it is, you know.

996
00:49:06,560 --> 00:49:07,359
Speaker 2: Yeah, and that's it.

997
00:49:07,440 --> 00:49:10,280
Speaker 1: That's it, because the truth is, we don't have money

998
00:49:10,840 --> 00:49:14,319
Speaker 1: all that ship that we a true legacy, what we

999
00:49:14,440 --> 00:49:17,879
Speaker 1: truly leave behind. It's not award, it's not fame, it's

1000
00:49:17,920 --> 00:49:20,719
Speaker 1: not money. It's our children. They're the ones who are

1001
00:49:20,800 --> 00:49:23,799
Speaker 1: carrying us on. Essentially, you know what I mean. And

1002
00:49:23,840 --> 00:49:26,799
Speaker 1: then our grandchildren and break grand I mean, we are

1003
00:49:26,920 --> 00:49:30,200
Speaker 1: the legacy and if we need to give them, we

1004
00:49:30,239 --> 00:49:32,760
Speaker 1: need to give them a piece of us, to impart

1005
00:49:32,800 --> 00:49:36,480
Speaker 1: wisdom into them that they can take or not. Then

1006
00:49:36,560 --> 00:49:37,600
Speaker 1: they will continue on.

1007
00:49:38,120 --> 00:49:42,800
Speaker 3: Yeah, Abs, absolutely well cool.

1008
00:49:42,680 --> 00:49:44,760
Speaker 2: This has been rather I appreciate you coming.

1009
00:49:44,640 --> 00:49:46,839
Speaker 3: On talking to appreciate your time.

1010
00:49:47,360 --> 00:49:49,879
Speaker 2: Be well, good luck with the book. Were good talking

1011
00:49:49,880 --> 00:49:50,640
Speaker 2: to you all right.

1012
00:49:50,520 --> 00:49:52,680
Speaker 3: Thank you, bye, take care. Thank you.