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Speaker 1: Buggle up, hold on tight. We got you here. It

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Speaker 1: is straw mayby letter subject brother in law has to go.

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Speaker 1: Good morning, Shirley and Steve. My husband got my brother

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Speaker 1: in law a job at his company and allowed him

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Speaker 1: to live with us a while, live with us while

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Speaker 1: he got us used to the city and found a

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Speaker 1: place to live. Well, that was two years ago. And

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Speaker 1: he eats all our food, doesn't clean up after himself.

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Speaker 1: We have We have no children, so one whole side

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Speaker 1: of the house is basically all to himself. He practically

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Speaker 1: practically lives here rent free, all paid utilities, food, cable,

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Speaker 1: pass uh passed to our community, jim oh passes to

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Speaker 1: our community, gym and pool, et cetera. You name it,

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Speaker 1: he's got it courtesy of us. Now, my husband got

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Speaker 1: a job about three hours away and had to get

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Speaker 1: an apartment to stay during the week, and he has

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Speaker 1: left me here with the mooture of his brother. I

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Speaker 1: want him out, but my husband says he feels a

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Speaker 1: lot better knowing someone who's in the house with me

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Speaker 1: than me being alone. I told my husband I did

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Speaker 1: not care. I was sick and tired of the situation.

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Speaker 1: He says. He told him to move out, and he

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Speaker 1: has mentioned his guilt of having to have done it.

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Speaker 1: Plus his mother has called him and given him the

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Speaker 1: guilt trip. I don't believe it's true and that he

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Speaker 1: will be out. I am counting down the days. My

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Speaker 1: question is what should I do if he's not out.

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Speaker 1: The worst part a couple of years before um, the

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Speaker 1: worst part a couple of years before that. My sister

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Speaker 1: and her kids lived with us for about a year.

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Speaker 1: She did pay for food, cooked and cleaned. But I

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Speaker 1: know he will hold it against me because he sees

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Speaker 1: it as us helping family desperately looking for a solution. Wow.

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Speaker 1: You know, one of the worst feelings to me in

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Speaker 1: the world is to be in your own home, you know,

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Speaker 1: and then be uncomfortable and to feel out of place.

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Speaker 1: I mean, that's where you go after a day's work.

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Speaker 1: You know, you close the doors, you shut off the

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Speaker 1: world and just have some peace, you know, some love

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Speaker 1: in your home. But but right now you're a prisoner

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Speaker 1: in your own home. It sounds to me because you

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Speaker 1: can't really do what you want to do. And that's

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Speaker 1: the key, because you know, it sounds as if you

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Speaker 1: don't think that it's your home too, or you're not

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Speaker 1: really getting that at your home too, And you can

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Speaker 1: speak up about this. I mean, you've been dealing with

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Speaker 1: this for two years, so you've just been walking around

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Speaker 1: miserable and upset for two years. Um. You know I

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Speaker 1: say this, You know it's a whole lot. This man,

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Speaker 1: your brother in law, has a job now. That means

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Speaker 1: he can definitely get out and get an apartment. Um

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Speaker 1: to me. The bigger problem in all of this, though,

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Speaker 1: is your husband. He's the one that doesn't get it.

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Speaker 1: You need to have a conversation with him. Tell him

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Speaker 1: he's confusing helping with enabling, and that this situation is

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Speaker 1: putting a big strain on your marriage. He's putting family

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Speaker 1: before you and that's really the wrong thing to do

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Speaker 1: in a marriage. His family needs to get out of

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Speaker 1: your house and your marriage. Steve, this is a bunch

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Speaker 1: of bull. It's what to see is the right here.

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Speaker 1: I can't stand letters like this. Right here, this is

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Speaker 1: a grown man in your house. Grown man got a job. Okay,

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Speaker 1: let me tell you where your letter went a little

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Speaker 1: crazy at uh, he got him a job at his company.

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Speaker 1: Live with us for a while. It's been two years,

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Speaker 1: who you know working can't get an apartment after two years. Okay,

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Speaker 1: he eats up all our food, doesn't clean up after

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Speaker 1: we have no children, so he has one side of

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Speaker 1: the whole house basically to himself. Well, here's a correction.

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Speaker 1: You do have children. You do have children, and it's him,

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Speaker 1: the big gass dude that stay in the house, that

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Speaker 1: can drive and go to work. That's your child. Now,

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Speaker 1: do ain't your brother in law? That's you all child? Uh,

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Speaker 1: he's got all of this stuff, paid utilities, he doesn't

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Speaker 1: pay rent any utilities and buy food, cable passed to

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Speaker 1: the community, jim and pool, you name it. He got it.

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Speaker 1: I want him out. My husband says he feels better

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Speaker 1: knowing that there's someone in the house with me. You

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Speaker 1: know how many grown women can stay by their self?

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Speaker 1: Do you know how many grown women can stay in

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Speaker 1: their house by their self. That's a ridiculous response. I

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Speaker 1: feel better knowing somebody's therere with you? Man? Are you nuts?

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Speaker 1: That's a great thing to say. You ain't there. You

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Speaker 1: have moved out on the man. Now you haven't left

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Speaker 1: your woman at the house because you got a job

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Speaker 1: three hours away, and you'd have left this man in

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Speaker 1: the house with your want Are you nuts. I got it,

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Speaker 1: your brother, And you don't think nothing gonna happen. I'm

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Speaker 1: not saying nothing, we all happen. I'm just saying she's

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Speaker 1: sick of she can't come home walk around her own

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Speaker 1: house naked. And lord no, we all like to see

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Speaker 1: them walk through the house naked. Anyway, that's a whole

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Speaker 1: nothing thing. Uh. He felt guilt. He says his mother

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Speaker 1: has called him and giving him the guilt trip. Hell,

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Speaker 1: let him stay with his mama. Then if the mama

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Speaker 1: gotta givet trip, somebody else opened up the house and

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Speaker 1: let home of the homeless movie. But you've got to

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Speaker 1: stop this. Um, I got some responses for you when

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Speaker 1: I come back. This is how to get someone to

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Speaker 1: leave your house. All right, Part two of Steve's response.

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Speaker 1: It's coming up. I think it's between cigars and golf holes.

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Speaker 1: Toe after he'll be back and we'll be back. Come on,

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Speaker 1: Steve right now with part two of today's Strawberry letter.

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Speaker 1: Your response back to this letter, brother in law gotta go?

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Speaker 1: Uh the brother in law do have to go? Period?

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Speaker 1: You know this is crazy right here? See here's what

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Speaker 1: Here's I got helping your brother get on his feet,

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Speaker 1: but seeing what people confuse it helping somebody and taking

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Speaker 1: care of somebody. It's two different things. If you are

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Speaker 1: a person who needs a nurse at your house every day,

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Speaker 1: then you got somebody that's coming by taking care of you.

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Speaker 1: Flipping you, washing you white, being you, spreading you, rolling you, over,

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Speaker 1: powdering you. That's taking care of somebody. That's too much.

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Speaker 1: All I wanna do is help you. I went to

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Speaker 1: the store boxing prescription, bought it, puts it on nice skate,

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Speaker 1: nicety ill let you tomorrow. That's helping somebody. Taking care

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Speaker 1: of somebody is putting the pill in their mouth and

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Speaker 1: making them chewing you, opening their jaw and making them

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Speaker 1: lacking much on it. That that's what that is. That's

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Speaker 1: too much. Rule number one. See, and the husband's got

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Speaker 1: to require that his brother be a man. Stop cuddling

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Speaker 1: this little boy, be a man, get up on your own.

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Speaker 1: Why don't and why these dudes get their little brothers

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Speaker 1: and these mothers require that you take care of his

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Speaker 1: boy like here, boy the rest of his life. Rule

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Speaker 1: number one in my house. No rent, no food, no cleaning,

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Speaker 1: no stay. That's rule number one. If you don't do

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Speaker 1: these three things right here, then you can't stay the day,

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Speaker 1: I say, your case day, Now, how do you get

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Speaker 1: him out? Listen to me. This is some things you

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Speaker 1: can do because your husband has moved to this apartment

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Speaker 1: during the week. Here's what you do. Put combination locks

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Speaker 1: on all the toilets, on the toilets, not the toilet,

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Speaker 1: and then act like you can't remember the combination. He

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Speaker 1: got to go somewhere you can't hold it. Number two,

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Speaker 1: chain a pit bull to the refrigerator. That cut back

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Speaker 1: on eating, and once you can't go to bathroom, you

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Speaker 1: can't eat. You really have to find somewhere to stay.

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Speaker 1: If that don't work, it's got to work. You can

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Speaker 1: always ask your sister and all hookkies to move back

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Speaker 1: in in his room. Make it real crowded in there,

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Speaker 1: crazy all right. See, we gotta go. Thank you so

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Speaker 1: very much. Email us or instagram your thoughts on today's

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Speaker 1: Strawberry letter at My Girl Shirley Switching gears Now