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Speaker 1: Hello, my beautiful people. Welcome to your favorite podcast, Cheek

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Speaker 1: Is in Chill, where you come to Chill to listen,

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Speaker 1: to grow, and to glow. I hope you all are

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Speaker 1: enjoying season four, because I definitely am. We've covered so

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Speaker 1: many different topics and I can't wait for you guys

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Speaker 1: to hear what else we have in store for you.

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Speaker 1: So let me get into today's episode because our guest

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Speaker 1: is a very special guest and he's very excited to

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Speaker 1: be here, and I'm excited that he's here and I'm

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Speaker 1: excited to have him. His name is Emilio marist Sanchez.

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Speaker 1: He happens to be my husband.

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Speaker 2: Say hello, babe, Hi, beautiful girl.

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Speaker 1: So I'm putting him on the hot seat today because

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Speaker 1: we're going to talk about our first year of marriage

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Speaker 1: and how it's gone and how we're navigating challenges and situations.

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Speaker 1: And then we'll wrap up the episode with some advice

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Speaker 1: for any newlyweds out there, So be sure to listen

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Speaker 1: to the entire episode.

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Speaker 3: Are you ready, bibe?

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Speaker 2: Yes? I am all right.

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Speaker 1: So before we get into it, I wanted to give

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Speaker 1: you guys a little recap. We tied the knot on

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Speaker 1: July fifth, twenty twenty four. It was a very intimate

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Speaker 1: wedding in Las Vegas, and it was a very special night.

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Speaker 1: It's a very special day that I'll never forget. And

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Speaker 1: we did not prepare for this episode. I mean, that's

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Speaker 1: the way I like to do things, you guys. I

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Speaker 1: like to just speak from the heart. He doesn't know

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Speaker 1: exactly what we're going to talk about. We're just gonna

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Speaker 1: say the truth because everyone, not everyone, but a lot

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Speaker 1: of people have shared that the first year of marriage

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Speaker 1: is the hardest, and I don't know. I wouldn't say

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Speaker 1: that it was. I mean, it wasn't easy peasy, I'll

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Speaker 1: tell you that much. So let's go back to last

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Speaker 1: year when we got married. Okay, I think because we

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Speaker 1: were in the middle of touring and we had a

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Speaker 1: very busy year, we spent a lot of time together

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Speaker 1: that we were very fortunate that even though we were

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Speaker 1: both working, because you had you were on tour with

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Speaker 1: Becky and then I was on lakadem I was doing

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Speaker 1: so much, but we were able to spend a lot

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Speaker 1: of time together.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, and so I feel.

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Speaker 1: Like we were just in the nitty gritty and working

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Speaker 1: and grinding that it felt. Yes, we're married and it

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Speaker 1: was good and I don't feel like it was in

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Speaker 1: any way bad. But then things slowed down and I

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Speaker 1: feel like stuff got real in January of this year.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, why, well, I just want to kind of explain

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Speaker 2: on like how crazy it was last year, because because

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Speaker 2: it's like, yeah, we did get married, and then it

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Speaker 2: was just so many things. And while all these things

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Speaker 2: are happening, you also dropped Gesiga Passando, which was like

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Speaker 2: our marriage anthem for the year. And looking back at

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Speaker 2: it now, it was like it was very present, like

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Speaker 2: we felt we felt a love from everybody. It was

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Speaker 2: just a love year. You know.

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Speaker 3: It was beautiful for sure, it was.

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Speaker 2: A lot it was. It felt really good, It was

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Speaker 2: really fun, and it felt big, you know in our lives,

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Speaker 2: well for me.

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Speaker 3: At least same.

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Speaker 2: And and then yeah, in January, then it calmed down.

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Speaker 1: It did calm down, I think because you know, the

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Speaker 1: dust started settling in other words, and you know, things

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Speaker 1: started slowing down, and then I started IVF.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, January was just so much just remind me, I mean,

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Speaker 2: just a lot of even I mean the last few

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Speaker 2: days of our vacation that's when the Los Angeles fire started,

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Speaker 2: and I think it had such an impact on us,

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Speaker 2: especially because you know, we live here in Los Angeles

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Speaker 2: and it affected a lot of people and a lot

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Speaker 2: of people we care about and just our city, you know,

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Speaker 2: and I wrecked me.

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Speaker 3: Guys.

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Speaker 2: It started like a kind of a snowball effect from there.

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Speaker 1: For sure, I agree with you, and that's why I'm

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Speaker 1: so glad that I can talk to you about this,

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Speaker 1: because I tend to forget things, you guys, and apparently

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Speaker 1: it's due to traumatic experiences in my childhood that that's

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Speaker 1: like a coping mechanism. This is something I just recently learned,

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Speaker 1: because I'm like, why is it that I can't remember

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Speaker 1: certain things. I have to write things down and then

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Speaker 1: I just unless I see a picture then it sparks

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Speaker 1: the memory. So anyway, I'm glad you did bring that

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Speaker 1: up because it took me back to last year November,

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Speaker 1: and I remember us being in Miami and it was

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Speaker 1: beautiful because I won my third Latin Grammy. You were

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Speaker 1: with me, we took awesome pictures and I think that

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Speaker 1: was the beginning of me taking medication for IVF. So

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Speaker 1: I was feeling it, but not as heavily. And then

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Speaker 1: in December was when we went to the Philippines and

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Speaker 1: we had our vacation and it was amazing. And then

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Speaker 1: at the tail end of it, I was doing my

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Speaker 1: best to just not be on my phone because that's

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Speaker 1: one of the biggest things with Amlie and I that

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Speaker 1: he likes me to be present and not work as much,

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Speaker 1: which I appreciate. It's a little difficult. I think that's

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Speaker 1: been one of the hardest things in our relationship. And

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Speaker 1: correct me if I'm wrong, babe, but it has been

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Speaker 1: a little difficult because I am a bit of a workaholic.

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Speaker 1: But with Emilio being with him, with you, it's really

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Speaker 1: just helped me remember what's important and anyway, so I

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Speaker 1: tried to stay off my phone the entire time we

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Speaker 1: were there, just whatever was necessary. And then the fires

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Speaker 1: did happen, and it really affected me, like I felt

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Speaker 1: like I was abandoning my city, and he had to

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Speaker 1: remind me, like, Babe, there's not much that we can

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Speaker 1: do even if we were there. This is happening. But

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Speaker 1: I felt like, oh my gosh, my siblings are out

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Speaker 1: there and I'm in the Philippines, like across the globe,

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Speaker 1: and it was driving me a little bit nuts, and

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Speaker 1: I wanted to come back because I wanted to help,

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Speaker 1: and we had what like three more days in our trip,

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Speaker 1: and I just had to kind of silence everything. And

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Speaker 1: like Emilio said, it was a snowball effect because I

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Speaker 1: was also on these hormones you guys, and taking the

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Speaker 1: medicine that my IVF doctor you know, needed me to

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Speaker 1: take in order to get pregnant. And I was an

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Speaker 1: emotional wreck. And I don't know if you want to

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Speaker 1: take it from there.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, No, just to touch on that a little bit, like,

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Speaker 2: you know, we were in vacation mode, so our mind

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Speaker 2: was really you know, relaxed, and we were chilling, and

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Speaker 2: you know, it was a big enough event where it

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Speaker 2: was all over the news in the Philippines, Like, yes,

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Speaker 2: it was on the TVs everywhere we were walking. We

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Speaker 2: can see just just fires all over the TV. When

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Speaker 2: you're in another country and you see our home on

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Speaker 2: fire on the television, like it just it hits different

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Speaker 2: than like seeing it if you're here. Yeah, And so

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Speaker 2: it was just like, all right, let's go, let's get home.

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Speaker 2: And then also to touch on like the the phone

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Speaker 2: thing too. It's not that I'm like, oh, we can't

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Speaker 2: have phones or we can't be on our phone or

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Speaker 2: we can't check our phone. My biggest thing with is like,

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Speaker 2: like I love being present with each other. And that means,

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Speaker 2: you know, many different things like if we're if we're

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Speaker 2: on a walk, if we're walking down the street to

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Speaker 2: get to a restaurant or something, and like I point

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Speaker 2: something out and I say, hey, looked at this or

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Speaker 2: this or that, like and our engagement with like being

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Speaker 2: wherever we're being or wherever we're at, Like that is

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Speaker 2: like the biggest connection to me to like look at

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Speaker 2: this or look at that, experience this with me set

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Speaker 2: and like that's when I feel the best where I'm

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Speaker 2: with you and most connected.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, when our eyes are seeing the same things on

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Speaker 1: the road, Yes, And I get it because there are

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Speaker 1: a lot of times when Emidia is driving and I

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Speaker 1: am working, I'm on my phone and he's like, oh

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Speaker 1: my god, did you see this in the sky And

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Speaker 1: he's so present and I'm like, wait what and I

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Speaker 1: miss it. So I've learned to slow down and just

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Speaker 1: tell myself that can wait. Because I love to be

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Speaker 1: very responsible. I love to work. I love what I do,

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Speaker 1: you guys, So it's been very difficult to find that balance.

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Speaker 1: But I'm so grateful because Emilio has been that reminder

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Speaker 1: for me, and I'm grateful, you know, Yeah, I.

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Speaker 3: Really really am.

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Speaker 1: And we have not really talked about IVF and how

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Speaker 1: it's made me feel. And this is a very touchy

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Speaker 1: subject for Emilia and I right now, because you know,

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Speaker 1: we want to have a baby. And the medication wasn't

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Speaker 1: making me feel like myself. I felt like I was

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Speaker 1: on mute. I could not think straight, I could not

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Speaker 1: get my thoughts straight at all. Everything was foggy, My

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Speaker 1: energy levels were very low. I was very sad, I

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Speaker 1: was angry. Him and I were having the worst arguments

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Speaker 1: we ever had. Guys, he already understands that I'm a

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Speaker 1: very very sensitive and with the medicine, I was ultra sensitive,

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Speaker 1: and I think we were just it was like water

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Speaker 1: and fire mixing and it would just sizzle and we

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Speaker 1: had these crazy arguments, right, babe.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, are you trying to remember?

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Speaker 2: No, I'm not. I'm just I'm trying to My brain

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Speaker 2: is just working, you know, and it just makes me

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Speaker 2: think of like what an argument is and what a

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Speaker 2: fight is, and like how different they are. We had

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Speaker 2: very intense arguments. M thankfully I think that we don't

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Speaker 2: fight a lot. I don't think we fight. I think

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Speaker 2: fighting is when you're just going at it with a

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Speaker 2: partner and the actual problem is not even you know,

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Speaker 2: discussed or engage with. Like then you're just like insulting

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Speaker 2: and yelling and I don't know, throwing stuff, Like we

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Speaker 2: don't do any of that. Like our arguments are like

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Speaker 2: especially I think with this one, because it was I

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Speaker 2: believe it's like one of the biggest subjects of life

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Speaker 2: that you can discuss, so like it's our two perspectives

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Speaker 2: coming together and trying to fit that together. Is like

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Speaker 2: it can can be explosives.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, for sure.

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Speaker 2: Yeah.

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Speaker 1: I remember this specific night, and I don't even remember

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Speaker 1: what we were arguing about. To be completely honest, our arguments,

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Speaker 1: our discussions, whatever you want to call them, are very silly.

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Speaker 1: Once I sit and think about it, I'm like, why

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Speaker 1: did we even argue? It's just because I just wasn't

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Speaker 1: being my best self. I wasn't and I didn't feel

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Speaker 1: like my best self. You guys, I felt like someone

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Speaker 1: was taking over my body. And I don't know how

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Speaker 1: else to explain it, but I told him, I mean

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Speaker 1: I felt like I wanted to smile and be happy.

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Speaker 1: But and I would listen to a song because music

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Speaker 1: makes me happy, right, and I just couldn't. I'm like,

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Speaker 1: oh my gosh, I want my body stuck. Like I

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Speaker 1: felt like I was. My hands were tied. It's the

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Speaker 1: weirdest thing.

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Speaker 3: Anyway.

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Speaker 1: I remember this specific argument that we had and he

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Speaker 1: was on the couch and I went upstairs and I

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Speaker 1: was just crying and this whole thing, and I wanted

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Speaker 1: him to come and hug me and you know, come

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Speaker 1: get me, you know, And he didn't. So I was like, oh,

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Speaker 1: I was so angry. I was laying there and I'm like,

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Speaker 1: oh my gosh, she's not He's really going to stay

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Speaker 1: down there. I think he had just had it because

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Speaker 1: it was a lot. And again, I was just a

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Speaker 1: hot mess, you guys. And I remember coming downstairs like

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Speaker 1: a little girl, never forget, and he was on the

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Speaker 1: couch and he was so mad, you could I could

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Speaker 1: see it in his face. I was like, oh, he's

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Speaker 1: so angry at me. And I just looked at him

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Speaker 1: and I started crying like a little girl. And I

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Speaker 1: was like, I'm sorry, I'm not being my best sell.

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Speaker 1: And I just started crying and he just held me.

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Speaker 1: He's like I could tell that he's just like okay,

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Speaker 1: and that's I think what you needed is just for

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Speaker 1: me to just, I guess, I don't know, be soft

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Speaker 1: and yes, let myself be loved.

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Speaker 3: I don't know.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I think it changes everything because I think I

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Speaker 2: can remember that exact moment where I was still upset,

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Speaker 2: but the feeling of having to be there for you

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Speaker 2: was greater than me being upset. I needed something to

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Speaker 2: knock me off my course. That was that I was

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Speaker 2: on of just I'm upset, we're fighting, yeah, And that

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Speaker 2: does it for me. When your attitude switches ups it

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Speaker 2: helps me like let go.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, And I've learned that.

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Speaker 1: I've learned that because I could argue, yeah, I have

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Speaker 1: been in my masculine energy for so long because I

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Speaker 1: had to in the music that I was singing in

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Speaker 1: the industry. It's like I had to have my fists up,

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Speaker 1: you know, kind of like on defense mode, like.

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Speaker 3: You know, be ready for war if need be.

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Speaker 1: And not that I wanted to be at war with anyone,

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Speaker 1: it was just it was always coming at me, you know,

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Speaker 1: and I had to be ready. So I feel like

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Speaker 1: for a long time I was in my masculine and

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Speaker 1: I had to be like my siblings, protector or whatnot.

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Speaker 1: And then God brought me Amidia, and I have been

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Speaker 1: able to step more into my feminine and realize that

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Speaker 1: even if he's also not being his best self, because

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Speaker 1: I think during that time, I think it was just

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Speaker 1: he didn't know what to do with me. But sometimes

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Speaker 1: I did feel like he wasn't as compassionate, like you,

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Speaker 1: weren't as compassionate as I would have liked.

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Speaker 2: It was a lot, There's so many things.

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Speaker 1: It was just such a hard time. It was the

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Speaker 1: last for three months, you guys.

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Speaker 3: It was.

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Speaker 1: Horrible, Like I had. We had cute moments and and

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Speaker 1: nice moments. But January February March, oh my gosh, you guys,

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Speaker 1: very very difficult in my eyes.

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Speaker 2: Emotionally yes, emotionally yes.

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Speaker 1: Then here's the difficult, uh, the very sensitive topic, delicate topic.

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Speaker 1: Here was when I decided that I did not want

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Speaker 1: to transfer our embryo. Yeah, because we were two weeks

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Speaker 1: away from that, and I had already taken medicine since November,

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Speaker 1: so November December January February March five months and I thought, okay,

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Speaker 1: we transfer, We're done. The baby's in there were good

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Speaker 1: no and I was willing to like, I'm like, okay,

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Speaker 1: I got this.

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Speaker 3: I'm a gangster, I'm a warrior. I got this. I'm

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Speaker 3: gonna get this done.

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Speaker 1: But then where I was like, oh my gosh, I

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Speaker 1: have to inject myself I don't know how many times

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Speaker 1: a day for three months so that my body doesn't

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Speaker 1: reject the embryo. I it just threw me through a

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Speaker 1: loop and I said, wait a second, I can't it's

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Speaker 1: so hard. I was trying so hard to keep it together,

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Speaker 1: and as it progressed, the process progressed, I got worse.

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Speaker 1: I would sit at my desk, I'm not kidding you guys,

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Speaker 1: trying to get so much done. I had a list

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Speaker 1: of things to get done, and I couldn't get one done.

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Speaker 1: I remember sitting at my desk for eight hours and

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Speaker 1: I didn't get one thing done. I could not use

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Speaker 1: my brain. I don't even know how to explain it that.

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Speaker 1: I said, Oh my gosh, something scared me. I said, wait,

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Speaker 1: let me try to do this holistically. Let me try

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Speaker 1: to just cleanse my body. And that was very difficult.

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Speaker 1: I mean, tell me how you felt.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, sorry, I just I want to go back to

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Speaker 2: arguing real quick, because yeah, I wanted to say something

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Speaker 2: on that where Yeah, sure, I feel like arguing with couples,

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Speaker 2: like it affects couples differently, and if it affects the

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Speaker 2: individuals and a couple differently, Like when we're arguing, you

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Speaker 2: can continue to do things like you can like talk

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Speaker 2: to people, you can you can listen to music, you

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Speaker 2: can do the chores that you need to do. You can,

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Speaker 2: like you just you continue to move and just keep going. Me,

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Speaker 2: I shut down and I can't do anything. I can't

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Speaker 2: look at my phone, I can't like, I can't think

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Speaker 2: about anything else. I don't want to move, I don't

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Speaker 2: want to do anything. And it's weird that we never

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Speaker 2: talked about that here. Yeah, you're right, but it sounds

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Speaker 2: so familiar because we talk about it all the time

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Speaker 2: and and it's like it helps it helps us, you know,

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Speaker 2: solve our arguments better or understand each other better because

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Speaker 2: everyone reacts differently to an argument with your partner. I

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Speaker 2: think we've gotten a lot better at knowing how our

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Speaker 2: partner reacts to arguments and being able to come together

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Speaker 2: a lot a lot easier than we used to. For sure,

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Speaker 2: and it's like, Okay, what I do is like, even

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Speaker 2: in this super heightened moment where we're either frustrated or

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Speaker 2: mad at each other or whatever, it's like, I think

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Speaker 2: a good thing that we're able to do is like, Okay,

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Speaker 2: what does my partner need at this critical moment? And

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Speaker 2: what can I do even if I'm mad, what can

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Speaker 2: I do to try to make that happen or help

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Speaker 2: or assist my partner get what they need at the

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Speaker 2: same time giving myself and getting what I need too. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: because in our arguments that I mean, that's that just

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Speaker 2: that down Now I'm just putting myself back downstairs on

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Speaker 2: the couch and you're upstairs and us coming together, like

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Speaker 2: how do we make that happen more easily in the

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Speaker 2: future and continue to do that?

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Speaker 1: You know, I think our ego to the side, at

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Speaker 1: least for me. Yeah, that's been the biggest thing for

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Speaker 1: me because I've again, I've had to defend myself for

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Speaker 1: the lack of a better term, like I just that's

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Speaker 1: how I had I felt like I had to, you know,

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Speaker 1: And now I understand that I have someone safe, someone

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Speaker 1: that makes me feel safe and gives me peace, and

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Speaker 1: I really want to be my best self and I

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Speaker 1: feel safe enough to do that. I want to be

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Speaker 1: in my soft growl era and embrace my femininity.

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Speaker 2: In the beginning, especially in the first couple of years,

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Speaker 2: like you would do that. And in my head, I'm like,

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Speaker 2: we're having this big argument and you're just continuing your life,

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Speaker 2: and it felt like you weren't there with me, or

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Speaker 2: you didn't care, or it didn't affect you as much.

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Speaker 2: But that's just now that I see, or now that

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Speaker 2: I understand. It's it's how you cope with it, and it's.

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Speaker 3: How my defense mechanism.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, how you deal with it, and it's just everyone

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Speaker 2: deals with it differently.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, for sure, And I'm so proud to say

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Speaker 1: that that is not the case. In this first year

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Speaker 1: of being married, I have definitely grown a lot, and

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Speaker 1: I think even Emilia has, and I'm happy to say that.

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Speaker 1: You know, right now, we do want a baby. We're

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Speaker 1: working on it, we're leaving it in God's hands, and

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Speaker 1: you know, we'll decide if IVF is for us.

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Speaker 3: In the future or what we're going to do.

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Speaker 1: But right now, I think we're enjoying our marriage and

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Speaker 1: I don't know, this is my person this is the

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Speaker 1: person that I want to be with. And sometimes this

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Speaker 1: has never happened to me in any other relationship where

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Speaker 1: we're arguing and I'm like, well, why am I going

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Speaker 1: to be mad? I mean, I want to be with

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Speaker 1: him anyway forever. So I just got to fix it.

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Speaker 1: And before I was like, no, I want to have

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Speaker 1: the last word, and it was just all these silly

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Speaker 1: things that comes from like ego. That now I'm like, well,

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Speaker 1: I love this guy, like I know I'm safe in

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Speaker 1: his arms, I know he wants the best for me,

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Speaker 1: and let's talk about it and we do that. Now

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Speaker 1: I'm really like happy that I don't. I don't feel bored.

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Speaker 1: I honestly I don't. I feel like I could be

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Speaker 1: with you every single day, every minute, and I don't

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Speaker 1: get bored and I still get to be myself. And

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Speaker 1: that's very important for me because I want to be

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Speaker 1: in a relationship where I am my authentic and you know,

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Speaker 1: embrace our individuality. And I think we've gotten there.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I I'm thinking about I'm thinking about IVF right

378
00:19:36,320 --> 00:19:41,919
Speaker 2: now because it's just it's you know, it's just crazy

379
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Speaker 2: because I mean to be honest with everyone listening like

380
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Speaker 2: this is ongoing, like this is like right now in

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Speaker 2: the moment, and it's like me and Jane are do

382
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Speaker 2: for you know, these these conversations and they're just happening

383
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Speaker 2: right now, because I mean, I think it was maybe

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Speaker 2: a day two days ago.

385
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Speaker 3: We will two days ago.

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Speaker 2: Two days ago, we had a we're talking about trying

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Speaker 2: to figure this out of like are we doing IVF?

388
00:20:07,640 --> 00:20:09,800
Speaker 2: How many months do we really have to try naturally

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Speaker 2: before that is our option? Or just I was more

390
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Speaker 2: in the position of I want to do IVF right now,

391
00:20:15,880 --> 00:20:18,320
Speaker 2: and I just I want to have this baby without

392
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Speaker 2: trying to put pressure on Janney and without trying to

393
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Speaker 2: and I try to explain that to her two days ago. Actually,

394
00:20:23,440 --> 00:20:28,240
Speaker 2: you're correct two days ago, because yesterday I had a

395
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Speaker 2: phone call from a good friend.

396
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Speaker 3: She's been on the podcast.

397
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Speaker 2: Oh yeah, Liz Hernandez. And Liz is my big sister.

398
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Speaker 2: She's been there for me for a lot of things,

399
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Speaker 2: and we haven't talked in a while, and she called

400
00:20:41,440 --> 00:20:43,919
Speaker 2: me yesterday and I kind of just updated her a

401
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Speaker 2: little bit.

402
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Speaker 1: And you are so handsome, by the way, Thank you

403
00:20:47,760 --> 00:20:50,560
Speaker 1: do though, You're so cute. Are you getting emotional?

404
00:20:51,119 --> 00:20:57,240
Speaker 2: Yeah? She uh, she just reminded me of like this

405
00:20:57,440 --> 00:20:59,960
Speaker 2: is like our first year together, Like, enjoy this moment.

406
00:21:00,840 --> 00:21:02,960
Speaker 2: She's like, don't don't get stuck on. Oh, I'll be

407
00:21:03,000 --> 00:21:05,480
Speaker 2: happy when we're engaged. I'll be happy when we get married.

408
00:21:05,480 --> 00:21:07,000
Speaker 2: I'll be happy when we have a kid. She's like,

409
00:21:07,119 --> 00:21:10,000
Speaker 2: just just remember to be happy now, and like there

410
00:21:10,000 --> 00:21:12,840
Speaker 2: are things I know, but it's just I needed to

411
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Speaker 2: hear it. I didn't know that I needed to hear that.

412
00:21:17,680 --> 00:21:19,439
Speaker 2: It made me And that's when I texted you and

413
00:21:19,440 --> 00:21:21,399
Speaker 2: I was like, I feel better about things. And I'm like,

414
00:21:22,520 --> 00:21:24,639
Speaker 2: I don't want to rush it. I don't think we

415
00:21:24,680 --> 00:21:28,480
Speaker 2: need to rush it. In my head myself, my brain

416
00:21:28,560 --> 00:21:30,960
Speaker 2: tells me we need it now, now, now, because it'll

417
00:21:30,960 --> 00:21:33,679
Speaker 2: make us happy. And it's like, I'm already happy with

418
00:21:33,720 --> 00:21:36,240
Speaker 2: you and I'm really truly happy with you right now,

419
00:21:36,840 --> 00:21:40,240
Speaker 2: and it's our first year. Let's enjoy this first year

420
00:21:40,280 --> 00:21:44,040
Speaker 2: of marriage. There's no rush. We can get pregnant after

421
00:21:44,040 --> 00:21:48,639
Speaker 2: the first year, Like, there's no there's no real timeline. Yeah,

422
00:21:48,680 --> 00:21:52,000
Speaker 2: And like it really shifted a lot for me yesterday

423
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Speaker 2: after talking to her.

424
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Speaker 1: Thank God for Liz. Yeah, it was hard, it was tough.

425
00:21:57,800 --> 00:22:01,080
Speaker 1: It was a conversation that I was avoiding because I

426
00:22:01,800 --> 00:22:03,920
Speaker 1: know how much he wants his baby and I want

427
00:22:04,000 --> 00:22:07,240
Speaker 1: I want a baby as well. I just I know

428
00:22:07,400 --> 00:22:11,720
Speaker 1: because I know that if God got me pregnant naturally

429
00:22:11,840 --> 00:22:15,879
Speaker 1: last year, it can happen again. And I know that

430
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Speaker 1: God's going to make it happen. And IVF is a

431
00:22:19,040 --> 00:22:22,240
Speaker 1: beautiful thing, and if that's the route we decide to take,

432
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Speaker 1: then so be it. But it was tough. It is

433
00:22:27,840 --> 00:22:30,560
Speaker 1: very difficult, you guys. You know, I'm very honest with you,

434
00:22:30,640 --> 00:22:33,800
Speaker 1: and I think IVF is a beautiful thing that it's

435
00:22:33,840 --> 00:22:37,120
Speaker 1: a great option for people that can't conceive and have

436
00:22:37,240 --> 00:22:40,760
Speaker 1: the problems I have, the reproductive problems, the endometriosis and

437
00:22:40,840 --> 00:22:42,960
Speaker 1: all these the poly ups, just so many things. But

438
00:22:43,920 --> 00:22:46,199
Speaker 1: through it all, you guys, God made it happen, and

439
00:22:46,280 --> 00:22:48,840
Speaker 1: I just want it to happen naturally. And I'm glad

440
00:22:48,920 --> 00:22:50,679
Speaker 1: that Liz was able to talk to you about that

441
00:22:50,800 --> 00:22:54,119
Speaker 1: because I don't want pressure and I don't want to

442
00:22:54,160 --> 00:22:56,639
Speaker 1: force it and I just want to enjoy us. I

443
00:22:56,720 --> 00:22:59,639
Speaker 1: still kind of want to be selfish with you and

444
00:22:59,680 --> 00:23:02,960
Speaker 1: I and you know, baby is a huge responsibility and

445
00:23:02,960 --> 00:23:04,679
Speaker 1: I'm ready for it, more ready than I ever have

446
00:23:04,840 --> 00:23:06,800
Speaker 1: You're the only person in the world that ever made

447
00:23:06,840 --> 00:23:10,840
Speaker 1: me want to have a child, and I feel safe

448
00:23:11,320 --> 00:23:16,840
Speaker 1: with with doing so. But I'm also enjoying us, you know,

449
00:23:17,160 --> 00:23:20,720
Speaker 1: and celebrating our first year anniversary. You guys were going

450
00:23:20,800 --> 00:23:22,879
Speaker 1: to go to Egypt and to Paris and we're going

451
00:23:22,960 --> 00:23:25,040
Speaker 1: to just just him and I and I had never

452
00:23:25,160 --> 00:23:28,480
Speaker 1: imagined before in relationships that I was in, and I

453
00:23:28,520 --> 00:23:30,359
Speaker 1: think I told you guys this before when Amydia has

454
00:23:30,359 --> 00:23:33,240
Speaker 1: been on the podcast. But in my previous relationships, like

455
00:23:33,280 --> 00:23:37,000
Speaker 1: I could, I couldn't be with them for too long,

456
00:23:37,840 --> 00:23:40,240
Speaker 1: I'd get bored or it just I have so much

457
00:23:40,240 --> 00:23:43,159
Speaker 1: fun with with with you, GiB So I'm excited for that,

458
00:23:43,400 --> 00:23:45,400
Speaker 1: and I know that it's going to happen when it's

459
00:23:45,440 --> 00:23:49,280
Speaker 1: meant to happen, like we were, It's going to happen.

460
00:23:49,680 --> 00:23:53,280
Speaker 2: Yeah, you know, yeah, No, I feel a lot better

461
00:23:53,320 --> 00:23:57,560
Speaker 2: about it. And it's just crazy because, like guys, like

462
00:23:57,600 --> 00:24:00,800
Speaker 2: I've been meaning to tell you this and update you

463
00:24:00,960 --> 00:24:04,000
Speaker 2: since Hua and I I didn't have a chance. So

464
00:24:04,800 --> 00:24:08,880
Speaker 2: these are my real feelings, and the fears that make

465
00:24:08,960 --> 00:24:12,040
Speaker 2: me have these thoughts are just like, oh, we're just

466
00:24:12,080 --> 00:24:14,359
Speaker 2: going to get back into busy, busy and life is

467
00:24:14,400 --> 00:24:17,520
Speaker 2: gonna take away this opportunity for us to have that,

468
00:24:18,560 --> 00:24:22,919
Speaker 2: and I I need to not let that be the

469
00:24:22,960 --> 00:24:27,760
Speaker 2: thing that's like driving my thoughts because life's not going

470
00:24:27,840 --> 00:24:30,280
Speaker 2: to stop, and this baby's going to come when it comes.

471
00:24:30,800 --> 00:24:34,680
Speaker 1: And do you see my efforts and all the changes

472
00:24:34,680 --> 00:24:36,439
Speaker 1: that I've made to make this happen.

473
00:24:36,680 --> 00:24:39,040
Speaker 2: Absolutely I want you.

474
00:24:39,040 --> 00:24:41,840
Speaker 1: To like see that and the changes that I'm making

475
00:24:41,920 --> 00:24:44,240
Speaker 1: in every single way. Like you know how I am.

476
00:24:44,400 --> 00:24:48,000
Speaker 1: When I decide something, I go all in and I'm in, yeah,

477
00:24:48,240 --> 00:24:52,840
Speaker 1: you know, and I'm on this new it's not even new,

478
00:24:52,920 --> 00:24:54,960
Speaker 1: you guys. It's not like, oh I found Jane, Like, no,

479
00:24:55,119 --> 00:24:56,760
Speaker 1: I'm coming back to myself.

480
00:24:56,800 --> 00:24:59,840
Speaker 3: I'm coming back to Jane. I'm coming home to my soul.

481
00:25:00,600 --> 00:25:04,280
Speaker 1: And I just wanted to remind you about that because

482
00:25:05,480 --> 00:25:09,000
Speaker 1: I was very scared to disappoint you and upset you,

483
00:25:09,280 --> 00:25:11,520
Speaker 1: and you know, you get into your head as a

484
00:25:11,560 --> 00:25:13,760
Speaker 1: woman it's like, oh my gosh, I'm not going to

485
00:25:13,800 --> 00:25:15,960
Speaker 1: be able to do this, and you feel broken and

486
00:25:16,000 --> 00:25:17,640
Speaker 1: you feel all these things and I had to shake

487
00:25:17,640 --> 00:25:19,879
Speaker 1: it off and say, wait no, like I know my body,

488
00:25:19,920 --> 00:25:25,360
Speaker 1: my body is healing itself, my body is intelligent, and

489
00:25:25,480 --> 00:25:27,399
Speaker 1: I'm going to do my part and do what I

490
00:25:27,440 --> 00:25:29,879
Speaker 1: can to make it happen. And I have you know,

491
00:25:29,960 --> 00:25:33,960
Speaker 1: I did the indigenous medicine. I am willing to do

492
00:25:34,040 --> 00:25:36,720
Speaker 1: anything holistic to make it happen because I know that

493
00:25:36,840 --> 00:25:40,399
Speaker 1: it's possible. But I'm glad because I was feeling a

494
00:25:40,440 --> 00:25:44,879
Speaker 1: little bit of pressure and it was kind of taking

495
00:25:44,920 --> 00:25:46,960
Speaker 1: the fun out of it for me, if I could

496
00:25:47,000 --> 00:25:47,520
Speaker 1: be honest.

497
00:25:47,960 --> 00:25:51,560
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, And it's kind of tricky, especially for me

498
00:25:51,800 --> 00:25:54,680
Speaker 2: because and this is why two days ago I brought

499
00:25:54,720 --> 00:25:56,160
Speaker 2: it up and I was like, we need to talk

500
00:25:56,160 --> 00:26:01,399
Speaker 2: about this because I really don't bring it up like

501
00:26:01,560 --> 00:26:07,720
Speaker 2: I I feel like I don't verbally put pressure. And

502
00:26:07,800 --> 00:26:09,600
Speaker 2: if I do in any way I put you know,

503
00:26:09,680 --> 00:26:12,679
Speaker 2: I apologize, but I try not to bring it up

504
00:26:13,040 --> 00:26:15,480
Speaker 2: because I'm also just trying to like let it happen

505
00:26:15,520 --> 00:26:19,000
Speaker 2: in a way as well. But two days ago, I'm like, hey,

506
00:26:19,080 --> 00:26:21,159
Speaker 2: I just I know this is a tough conversation, but

507
00:26:21,200 --> 00:26:24,600
Speaker 2: I like, I just need to tell you again and

508
00:26:24,680 --> 00:26:27,920
Speaker 2: you show you that your ears can literally just hear it,

509
00:26:28,080 --> 00:26:32,119
Speaker 2: that there is no pressure. I'm here with you. I

510
00:26:32,200 --> 00:26:34,919
Speaker 2: just I had to tell you just to remind you.

511
00:26:34,960 --> 00:26:36,760
Speaker 2: Even if it's something that you already knew, and even

512
00:26:36,840 --> 00:26:39,240
Speaker 2: if it's if I had told you a month before

513
00:26:39,359 --> 00:26:41,280
Speaker 2: or two months before, like I just it's something that

514
00:26:41,359 --> 00:26:43,200
Speaker 2: I just need to remind I felt like I needed

515
00:26:43,200 --> 00:26:44,080
Speaker 2: to remind you love.

516
00:26:45,240 --> 00:26:47,480
Speaker 1: Yeah, and you did a great job and you held

517
00:26:47,520 --> 00:26:49,400
Speaker 1: me and I cried and you did make me feel

518
00:26:49,400 --> 00:26:52,120
Speaker 1: better and you made me feel safe and I feel

519
00:26:52,119 --> 00:26:57,560
Speaker 1: better about it. So I am grateful because it definitely

520
00:26:57,760 --> 00:27:01,240
Speaker 1: it just just made things feel better better. And guys,

521
00:27:01,280 --> 00:27:04,440
Speaker 1: this is this is a real conversation that's being had

522
00:27:04,560 --> 00:27:07,000
Speaker 1: here on the podcast. So thank you for your patients

523
00:27:07,040 --> 00:27:09,520
Speaker 1: and listening in. We're having a therapy session right now.

524
00:27:10,280 --> 00:27:12,040
Speaker 1: But that's what it is, you know. I mean if

525
00:27:12,080 --> 00:27:15,960
Speaker 1: you had to rate our first year of marriage from

526
00:27:15,960 --> 00:27:18,040
Speaker 1: a skill from one to ten, what would you heah?

527
00:27:18,240 --> 00:27:19,600
Speaker 2: Ten for real?

528
00:27:19,800 --> 00:27:20,800
Speaker 3: Okay, No, I'm serious.

529
00:27:20,800 --> 00:27:23,359
Speaker 2: You can tell I'm serious. Like it was, it was

530
00:27:23,440 --> 00:27:25,919
Speaker 2: exactly what it needed to be, exactly like what it

531
00:27:25,960 --> 00:27:28,920
Speaker 2: could have been. Like it was. It was great ups

532
00:27:28,960 --> 00:27:32,200
Speaker 2: and downs, like I wouldn't change absolutely anything about it.

533
00:27:32,320 --> 00:27:33,840
Speaker 2: Like I look at you right now, I'm like, I

534
00:27:33,840 --> 00:27:36,080
Speaker 2: am so happy with you, and I tell you every

535
00:27:36,119 --> 00:27:37,680
Speaker 2: day I want to marry you again. I want to

536
00:27:37,680 --> 00:27:38,280
Speaker 2: marry you again.

537
00:27:39,240 --> 00:27:42,119
Speaker 1: I hope you feel that like that forever, yeah, and

538
00:27:42,240 --> 00:27:44,760
Speaker 1: talking about that, Okay, well we'll wait. Well, thank you,

539
00:27:44,800 --> 00:27:47,000
Speaker 1: because I agree with you. I think that we've done

540
00:27:47,040 --> 00:27:49,000
Speaker 1: a very good job. I think because we're both ready

541
00:27:49,040 --> 00:27:51,000
Speaker 1: and we're both willing to do the work. That's the

542
00:27:51,000 --> 00:27:54,439
Speaker 1: biggest thing. That if I didn't have a husband and

543
00:27:54,480 --> 00:27:57,919
Speaker 1: a partner, a companion that wasn't willing to do the

544
00:27:58,000 --> 00:28:02,000
Speaker 1: work and was work working on himself in every single way,

545
00:28:02,920 --> 00:28:07,919
Speaker 1: it wouldn't allow me to also do my work, but

546
00:28:08,080 --> 00:28:10,040
Speaker 1: it would just make things more difficult. I think the

547
00:28:10,080 --> 00:28:12,879
Speaker 1: fact that we're on the same wavelength with that is

548
00:28:12,920 --> 00:28:15,320
Speaker 1: great because you're doing your thing. You're not like it's

549
00:28:15,320 --> 00:28:17,200
Speaker 1: not like I feel like I have to heal you.

550
00:28:17,720 --> 00:28:20,320
Speaker 1: It's you're doing your work and I'm doing mine, and

551
00:28:20,359 --> 00:28:23,640
Speaker 1: together we're stronger, and that's what a relationship is. Finally,

552
00:28:23,680 --> 00:28:26,879
Speaker 1: I freaking get it, Like I'm like okay, Like you know,

553
00:28:26,920 --> 00:28:28,400
Speaker 1: they always say, oh, I need to find me media

554
00:28:28,480 --> 00:28:31,800
Speaker 1: na angkha, like no, like, I'm already. I want to

555
00:28:31,800 --> 00:28:33,720
Speaker 1: be whole. You give me like, oh, in order for

556
00:28:33,760 --> 00:28:35,720
Speaker 1: me to be complete, I need to find my other half.

557
00:28:35,960 --> 00:28:38,360
Speaker 1: But in reality, you need to come into relationship being

558
00:28:38,480 --> 00:28:42,360
Speaker 1: whole yourself and that other person needs to be whole

559
00:28:42,400 --> 00:28:44,640
Speaker 1: and like loving themselves and then coming together and it

560
00:28:44,680 --> 00:28:45,320
Speaker 1: makes everything better.

561
00:28:45,360 --> 00:28:47,640
Speaker 2: Does that make sense, Sally? I get it.

562
00:28:55,400 --> 00:28:57,200
Speaker 3: So what do you rate me as a wife? Have

563
00:28:57,240 --> 00:28:58,720
Speaker 3: I been a good wife? Say the truth?

564
00:28:58,880 --> 00:29:01,720
Speaker 2: Yeah, I think you're awesome. I think you're honestly, I

565
00:29:01,760 --> 00:29:05,600
Speaker 2: think I'm so happy with the way everything is, even

566
00:29:05,640 --> 00:29:08,200
Speaker 2: the hard things, Like I wouldn't trade it for anything

567
00:29:08,720 --> 00:29:09,080
Speaker 2: at all.

568
00:29:09,760 --> 00:29:13,040
Speaker 1: Okay, cool and just a little you know, side funny story,

569
00:29:13,040 --> 00:29:17,280
Speaker 1: guys talking about this first year. We just recently put

570
00:29:17,360 --> 00:29:20,600
Speaker 1: up our wedding photos literally like a few days ago

571
00:29:21,760 --> 00:29:25,600
Speaker 1: in our home, and it just made our home feel

572
00:29:25,680 --> 00:29:29,000
Speaker 1: and look so beautiful and complete, and it just feels

573
00:29:29,920 --> 00:29:30,800
Speaker 1: like it's ours.

574
00:29:30,880 --> 00:29:32,680
Speaker 3: Do you get that feeling when I walk in?

575
00:29:32,720 --> 00:29:36,040
Speaker 1: It's just a beautiful reminder of Okay, I'm leaving all

576
00:29:36,040 --> 00:29:38,320
Speaker 1: the junk outside and I'm walking into my space with

577
00:29:38,360 --> 00:29:40,960
Speaker 1: my husband. That's every time I see the pictures, it

578
00:29:41,080 --> 00:29:43,760
Speaker 1: takes me back, like I'm like, Wow, I didn't realize

579
00:29:43,760 --> 00:29:46,640
Speaker 1: how important it is to see those pictures on a

580
00:29:46,720 --> 00:29:47,800
Speaker 1: daily basis.

581
00:29:48,160 --> 00:29:50,000
Speaker 3: Yes, it made me feel more connected.

582
00:29:50,720 --> 00:29:52,240
Speaker 2: It's the first thing you see when you walk into

583
00:29:52,280 --> 00:29:54,800
Speaker 2: our house. Now, yeah, there's so but every time I

584
00:29:54,840 --> 00:29:57,560
Speaker 2: pass it it, like I just I'll look at one

585
00:29:57,720 --> 00:29:59,760
Speaker 2: or I'll just get this feeling every time I see it,

586
00:30:00,000 --> 00:30:01,360
Speaker 2: and I'll just yell to you, my love, I want

587
00:30:01,400 --> 00:30:04,840
Speaker 2: to marry you again. It was really cool too, because

588
00:30:04,880 --> 00:30:09,280
Speaker 2: putting these photos up, like I looked through the gallery

589
00:30:09,360 --> 00:30:12,760
Speaker 2: again and like saw photos that, like, you know, after

590
00:30:12,800 --> 00:30:14,800
Speaker 2: we got married, Like you pick your favorite photos and

591
00:30:14,800 --> 00:30:16,560
Speaker 2: then you post them and then those are the photos

592
00:30:16,600 --> 00:30:18,480
Speaker 2: that live and the ones that you see. But then

593
00:30:18,800 --> 00:30:21,120
Speaker 2: when you go into the gallery, there was other photos

594
00:30:21,160 --> 00:30:23,360
Speaker 2: just that you didn't look at as much or that

595
00:30:23,400 --> 00:30:26,120
Speaker 2: you didn't see, and they just kind of like they

596
00:30:26,160 --> 00:30:28,520
Speaker 2: bring you back to that moment. And I just felt

597
00:30:28,520 --> 00:30:31,800
Speaker 2: it felt really good seeing all the different moments throughout

598
00:30:31,800 --> 00:30:34,600
Speaker 2: that day and how I felt in the room, how

599
00:30:34,640 --> 00:30:36,160
Speaker 2: I felt when I was waiting for you, how I

600
00:30:36,200 --> 00:30:38,160
Speaker 2: felt when we were finally done, like how I felt

601
00:30:38,160 --> 00:30:42,080
Speaker 2: when we saw each other, Like, like it was just

602
00:30:42,120 --> 00:30:42,640
Speaker 2: really cool.

603
00:30:43,320 --> 00:30:45,720
Speaker 1: I don't remember who told me, I can't remember right now,

604
00:30:45,720 --> 00:30:49,200
Speaker 1: but anyway, they said that the next time we have

605
00:30:49,240 --> 00:30:51,920
Speaker 1: an argument or we're having a rough patch, to go

606
00:30:52,040 --> 00:30:55,719
Speaker 1: back to our wedding video or read our vowels and

607
00:30:55,760 --> 00:30:58,480
Speaker 1: it just sets the tone again. And we haven't done that,

608
00:30:58,520 --> 00:31:00,160
Speaker 1: and I think we should do that in Paris or

609
00:31:00,200 --> 00:31:03,200
Speaker 1: won't work right who? I don't know if they told

610
00:31:03,200 --> 00:31:05,040
Speaker 1: you the same thing or who if they told this together,

611
00:31:05,080 --> 00:31:08,520
Speaker 1: but someone told me this, and we should because our

612
00:31:08,640 --> 00:31:11,480
Speaker 1: vowels were freaking superb guys.

613
00:31:11,560 --> 00:31:12,520
Speaker 2: Yeah, yours are crazy.

614
00:31:12,720 --> 00:31:15,680
Speaker 3: Yeah. I wrote my ass off.

615
00:31:15,960 --> 00:31:17,280
Speaker 2: Yours shook diarth a little bit.

616
00:31:18,360 --> 00:31:18,680
Speaker 3: Dude.

617
00:31:18,720 --> 00:31:20,760
Speaker 1: Honestly, guys, when I sit down and write and I'm

618
00:31:20,760 --> 00:31:24,440
Speaker 1: super inspired, I'm as you guys heard here on the podcast.

619
00:31:24,480 --> 00:31:25,959
Speaker 1: I've been writing a lot more and reading to you

620
00:31:25,960 --> 00:31:28,840
Speaker 1: guys what I write. My notes and my vowels were

621
00:31:29,240 --> 00:31:31,600
Speaker 1: off the chain. So I gotta I gotta do that.

622
00:31:32,160 --> 00:31:36,000
Speaker 2: Yeah, and what it's one of the photos that I

623
00:31:36,080 --> 00:31:39,040
Speaker 2: selected to put up on the wall, was you sitting

624
00:31:39,080 --> 00:31:41,080
Speaker 2: in your wedding dress, were writing your vowels to me?

625
00:31:41,680 --> 00:31:45,400
Speaker 3: Yeah, and writing My hand was hurt in like a mofod.

626
00:31:45,600 --> 00:31:48,240
Speaker 2: I did the same, and we had planned to do

627
00:31:48,320 --> 00:31:53,200
Speaker 2: this days before. We ended up without knowing, we ended

628
00:31:53,240 --> 00:31:56,040
Speaker 2: up both writing our vowels right before, which I think

629
00:31:56,120 --> 00:31:58,680
Speaker 2: is great because it's when you're feeling the most feelings,

630
00:31:58,680 --> 00:32:01,720
Speaker 2: and we also weren't with each other, and we hadn't

631
00:32:01,800 --> 00:32:03,120
Speaker 2: we didn't sleep with each other, so.

632
00:32:03,200 --> 00:32:04,920
Speaker 3: Like we didn't speak the whole day.

633
00:32:05,200 --> 00:32:07,120
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's weird. It was. It's really weird.

634
00:32:07,720 --> 00:32:09,480
Speaker 3: We're so connected. Did we were doing it at the

635
00:32:09,520 --> 00:32:10,080
Speaker 3: same time.

636
00:32:10,240 --> 00:32:12,000
Speaker 2: We did at the same time, which is fucking tight.

637
00:32:12,080 --> 00:32:14,040
Speaker 2: Sorry he was, And.

638
00:32:14,080 --> 00:32:17,560
Speaker 1: Going back to that moment just real quick, I could not.

639
00:32:17,720 --> 00:32:19,120
Speaker 1: I was like, I just want to finish writing these

640
00:32:19,160 --> 00:32:20,560
Speaker 1: vows already because I want to tell him and I

641
00:32:20,600 --> 00:32:22,240
Speaker 1: just want to see him. I just want my friend back.

642
00:32:22,480 --> 00:32:24,040
Speaker 1: I was like, it's been like a whole freaking day.

643
00:32:24,040 --> 00:32:25,680
Speaker 1: It was crazy. It was so nice. We got to

644
00:32:25,680 --> 00:32:28,720
Speaker 1: do it again, dude. So let me ask you a question, baby,

645
00:32:28,720 --> 00:32:31,440
Speaker 1: if you want me to answer first, I will answer.

646
00:32:31,640 --> 00:32:36,320
Speaker 1: But what is the best part about being married? Do

647
00:32:36,360 --> 00:32:38,640
Speaker 1: you think to me your only wife?

648
00:32:38,880 --> 00:32:43,520
Speaker 2: Yeah? Yeah, I mean the first thing that really just

649
00:32:43,560 --> 00:32:45,600
Speaker 2: comes to my head of like what I feel all

650
00:32:45,640 --> 00:32:49,520
Speaker 2: the time is just like I never feel alone in

651
00:32:49,520 --> 00:32:52,440
Speaker 2: my life in anything, Like I feel like I always

652
00:32:52,480 --> 00:32:55,080
Speaker 2: have someone, Like you know you have someone when you

653
00:32:55,120 --> 00:32:58,400
Speaker 2: go home, and anything that comes your way throughout your day,

654
00:32:58,480 --> 00:33:00,800
Speaker 2: like you get to bring it back and like share

655
00:33:00,840 --> 00:33:02,960
Speaker 2: it with your partner. Whether it's something really good, you're

656
00:33:03,000 --> 00:33:05,440
Speaker 2: the first person I call. If it's something really bad,

657
00:33:05,480 --> 00:33:08,120
Speaker 2: you're also the first person I call, you know, And

658
00:33:09,320 --> 00:33:11,920
Speaker 2: it just it feels so amazing to have someone that

659
00:33:13,680 --> 00:33:18,120
Speaker 2: for so many reasons of why you're an amazing wife,

660
00:33:18,240 --> 00:33:20,720
Speaker 2: but like that I trust dude, that I that we

661
00:33:20,800 --> 00:33:23,760
Speaker 2: love each other, that we connect so well, that we

662
00:33:23,840 --> 00:33:28,040
Speaker 2: have so much fun together. Okay, there's so many things obviously, right,

663
00:33:28,080 --> 00:33:31,280
Speaker 2: there's so many things that we understand about each other

664
00:33:31,360 --> 00:33:34,160
Speaker 2: why we love each other. But knowing that you have

665
00:33:34,320 --> 00:33:37,960
Speaker 2: that all the time, it's like what else would you want?

666
00:33:38,160 --> 00:33:40,680
Speaker 2: Like it is, It's the best thing ever, And so

667
00:33:41,720 --> 00:33:42,520
Speaker 2: having each other.

668
00:33:42,480 --> 00:33:44,040
Speaker 3: Is just it's a great race.

669
00:33:44,400 --> 00:33:48,040
Speaker 2: And seeing you know, I actually am seeing a lot

670
00:33:48,120 --> 00:33:52,680
Speaker 2: of you know, young people, my family friends, a lot

671
00:33:52,680 --> 00:33:55,880
Speaker 2: of young guys like starting to get engaged, and I

672
00:33:56,040 --> 00:33:58,120
Speaker 2: just catch myself like just trying to talk to them

673
00:33:58,160 --> 00:34:00,320
Speaker 2: and like kind of guide them a little bit, you know,

674
00:34:00,640 --> 00:34:03,680
Speaker 2: And it feels good. It feels good to do that

675
00:34:03,720 --> 00:34:07,160
Speaker 2: to like try to pass that along. Because I left

676
00:34:07,160 --> 00:34:08,880
Speaker 2: a comment on one of my little cousins and he

677
00:34:08,920 --> 00:34:11,160
Speaker 2: got engaged in I think he's super young to do it,

678
00:34:11,239 --> 00:34:13,880
Speaker 2: but I said, I just said, hey, dude, marriage is

679
00:34:13,880 --> 00:34:15,799
Speaker 2: the best thing you can ever do if you do

680
00:34:15,840 --> 00:34:19,879
Speaker 2: it right. Yeah, And so that's how I feel about

681
00:34:19,880 --> 00:34:23,160
Speaker 2: my marriage. It's the best thing I could I could

682
00:34:23,160 --> 00:34:23,520
Speaker 2: have done.

683
00:34:24,360 --> 00:34:25,040
Speaker 3: Yeah. Same.

684
00:34:25,480 --> 00:34:29,720
Speaker 1: I'm so happy that I gave marriage a second chance

685
00:34:29,840 --> 00:34:33,080
Speaker 1: because this is amazing. And this is my first time

686
00:34:33,120 --> 00:34:35,000
Speaker 1: being married for a year, you guys, so that's a

687
00:34:35,160 --> 00:34:39,359
Speaker 1: huge thing for me. Yeah, so thank you.

688
00:34:39,400 --> 00:34:40,960
Speaker 3: I'm super excited to celebrate it.

689
00:34:41,480 --> 00:34:45,560
Speaker 1: And yeah, I think the best part about being married is,

690
00:34:46,120 --> 00:34:47,960
Speaker 1: you know, kind of to piggyback on what you said

691
00:34:48,080 --> 00:34:51,160
Speaker 1: was just companionship, knowing that even when the world is

692
00:34:51,239 --> 00:34:55,760
Speaker 1: falling apart, because I have felt that in the last

693
00:34:55,840 --> 00:35:00,239
Speaker 1: year quite a bit in my personal life with my sibling,

694
00:35:01,560 --> 00:35:04,040
Speaker 1: my career, just so many different things. And just to

695
00:35:04,080 --> 00:35:07,759
Speaker 1: know that I have someone to lean on and lay

696
00:35:07,800 --> 00:35:11,399
Speaker 1: my head on is amazing. And not only that, it's

697
00:35:11,480 --> 00:35:13,640
Speaker 1: just it's the right person, the person that is going

698
00:35:13,719 --> 00:35:16,400
Speaker 1: to make me feel better, knows what to tell me

699
00:35:16,440 --> 00:35:19,399
Speaker 1: and gives me good advice because he wants the best

700
00:35:19,400 --> 00:35:22,080
Speaker 1: for me. That is the best part. That I could

701
00:35:22,120 --> 00:35:25,400
Speaker 1: still be myself because I don't ever want to feel

702
00:35:25,400 --> 00:35:29,400
Speaker 1: controlled or in any way like I'm being tamed. It

703
00:35:29,440 --> 00:35:31,640
Speaker 1: sounds weird, but it's like I want to tame myself.

704
00:35:31,719 --> 00:35:34,640
Speaker 1: I want to change because I want to, not because

705
00:35:34,640 --> 00:35:36,759
Speaker 1: someone's making me. And I've never felt that with you.

706
00:35:37,560 --> 00:35:38,920
Speaker 1: So I want to say thank you for that. And

707
00:35:38,960 --> 00:35:42,160
Speaker 1: it's just nice to have a friend that I also

708
00:35:42,200 --> 00:35:46,400
Speaker 1: get to make love to and laugh with and argue

709
00:35:46,400 --> 00:35:48,680
Speaker 1: with and then make up and just have fun. It's

710
00:35:48,800 --> 00:35:52,479
Speaker 1: it's that companionship, you know. So it's been the best

711
00:35:52,480 --> 00:35:55,279
Speaker 1: part about being married. And someone that likes to eat

712
00:35:55,320 --> 00:35:57,759
Speaker 1: the same foods that I like to eat. Yeah, because

713
00:35:57,800 --> 00:36:01,120
Speaker 1: that's important. Yo, we love to eat.

714
00:36:02,160 --> 00:36:03,640
Speaker 2: Is in a bad mood, just get her some food

715
00:36:05,640 --> 00:36:07,680
Speaker 2: because they will change in a heartbeat.

716
00:36:07,920 --> 00:36:08,720
Speaker 3: Whatever, dude.

717
00:36:09,040 --> 00:36:12,200
Speaker 2: Second, and she'll eat mad I see, I sure will.

718
00:36:13,000 --> 00:36:14,960
Speaker 2: When we're arguing and we have food, I just I

719
00:36:15,040 --> 00:36:18,040
Speaker 2: won't eat. I'll just leave it there. She will eat.

720
00:36:18,120 --> 00:36:21,440
Speaker 2: She don't care, And I'm like, yeah, I was like you,

721
00:36:21,440 --> 00:36:22,800
Speaker 2: you must have been really hungry.

722
00:36:24,719 --> 00:36:27,640
Speaker 1: That is true, you guys whatever, Emilio, you know what. See,

723
00:36:27,640 --> 00:36:30,680
Speaker 1: that's how you guys know. I'm consistent and very authentic

724
00:36:30,719 --> 00:36:32,640
Speaker 1: and everything that I do because I am a foodie,

725
00:36:32,719 --> 00:36:36,200
Speaker 1: even when I'm mad, Okay, like I am consistent in

726
00:36:36,239 --> 00:36:38,279
Speaker 1: everything that I do, So thank you for pointing that out.

727
00:36:38,320 --> 00:36:38,480
Speaker 3: Then.

728
00:36:38,800 --> 00:36:40,759
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's one of my favorite things about you.

729
00:36:43,440 --> 00:36:46,320
Speaker 1: And I'm happy to say that Immedial is the same

730
00:36:46,360 --> 00:36:50,920
Speaker 1: exact person, if not better, every single day, you know,

731
00:36:51,360 --> 00:36:54,080
Speaker 1: is the You're the person that I chosen, and I'm

732
00:36:54,120 --> 00:36:56,680
Speaker 1: glad that I did. And I love to say that

733
00:36:56,719 --> 00:36:59,920
Speaker 1: you haven't. You haven't changed. In my mind, while we

734
00:36:59,920 --> 00:37:01,759
Speaker 1: were going through IVF and I was in a very

735
00:37:01,840 --> 00:37:03,960
Speaker 1: dark place, I thought that you had changed.

736
00:37:04,000 --> 00:37:06,040
Speaker 3: I kept telling you. I was like, you're different, You're

737
00:37:06,080 --> 00:37:08,000
Speaker 3: not treating me the same. It was crazy.

738
00:37:08,160 --> 00:37:09,319
Speaker 2: Both were feeling things that.

739
00:37:09,239 --> 00:37:12,120
Speaker 1: We Yeah, we were feeling ourself very foreign. Yeah it

740
00:37:12,160 --> 00:37:15,640
Speaker 1: was very heavy. It was heavy and dense. But nonetheless

741
00:37:15,680 --> 00:37:17,920
Speaker 1: you were there for me and I'm grateful and I

742
00:37:17,960 --> 00:37:20,520
Speaker 1: am completely one hundred percent in love with you, and

743
00:37:20,719 --> 00:37:21,880
Speaker 1: I just want to say thank.

744
00:37:21,680 --> 00:37:23,000
Speaker 2: You, dude, thank you.

745
00:37:23,640 --> 00:37:24,600
Speaker 3: I don't know if you.

746
00:37:24,480 --> 00:37:29,080
Speaker 1: Would like to give any newlyweds out there some advice

747
00:37:29,120 --> 00:37:32,960
Speaker 1: real quick, you know, on the first year of marriage

748
00:37:33,000 --> 00:37:38,440
Speaker 1: and how to navigate through emotions.

749
00:37:38,520 --> 00:37:43,319
Speaker 2: I think just to recap everything real quick. Yes, we

750
00:37:43,360 --> 00:37:46,600
Speaker 2: talked about a lot of the heavy stuff, but for

751
00:37:46,680 --> 00:37:49,080
Speaker 2: every like if there was like ten percent heavy stuff

752
00:37:49,080 --> 00:37:51,319
Speaker 2: like that, ninety percent of all the good is like

753
00:37:51,440 --> 00:37:55,319
Speaker 2: it's still happening, and it's still you know, it's it's

754
00:37:55,360 --> 00:37:59,040
Speaker 2: for us. It's it's our daily happiness, our the happiness

755
00:37:59,080 --> 00:38:01,000
Speaker 2: that we have when we go on and when we're

756
00:38:01,120 --> 00:38:04,120
Speaker 2: at home and when we're their family or just you know,

757
00:38:05,200 --> 00:38:08,600
Speaker 2: all that is like amazing and it makes everything else

758
00:38:08,719 --> 00:38:11,920
Speaker 2: like worth it, and it makes everything, It makes everything

759
00:38:12,000 --> 00:38:15,040
Speaker 2: makes sense. I think the biggest thing is just it's

760
00:38:15,120 --> 00:38:20,040
Speaker 2: just patience, because when you have patience, you're going to understand.

761
00:38:20,480 --> 00:38:23,520
Speaker 2: And then when you understand it's you're just going to

762
00:38:23,560 --> 00:38:26,480
Speaker 2: connect with your partner even more. Just really try to

763
00:38:26,560 --> 00:38:29,320
Speaker 2: understand your partner and what they need at all moments.

764
00:38:29,640 --> 00:38:34,120
Speaker 2: And if you do that and not really think about yourself,

765
00:38:34,120 --> 00:38:37,439
Speaker 2: your partner will take care of you the way you need. Yeah,

766
00:38:37,480 --> 00:38:39,040
Speaker 2: and I think we do a really good job at that.

767
00:38:39,800 --> 00:38:43,799
Speaker 1: I agree, I agree. I love everything you said. And

768
00:38:44,000 --> 00:38:49,200
Speaker 1: if I can give you guys any advice, definitely keep

769
00:38:49,239 --> 00:38:52,160
Speaker 1: God in the center of your relationship. Pray together every night.

770
00:38:53,719 --> 00:38:57,480
Speaker 1: There are going to be arguments, Just remember that you

771
00:38:57,600 --> 00:39:01,440
Speaker 1: chose that person and if you chose that person and

772
00:39:01,520 --> 00:39:03,480
Speaker 1: it feels right and you feel peace in your heart,

773
00:39:03,960 --> 00:39:09,560
Speaker 1: and your partner is willing to give as much as

774
00:39:09,600 --> 00:39:15,120
Speaker 1: you're willing to give, then he's also worth you leaning in,

775
00:39:15,960 --> 00:39:20,239
Speaker 1: even if that means that you have to apologize or

776
00:39:20,320 --> 00:39:23,720
Speaker 1: fix things, even if you feel it's not my fault,

777
00:39:23,960 --> 00:39:28,200
Speaker 1: like put the ego to the side. Guys, it's not

778
00:39:28,320 --> 00:39:31,600
Speaker 1: worth it. It's time wasted, it's energy wasted. And that's

779
00:39:31,640 --> 00:39:34,879
Speaker 1: something that I have had to remind myself and just say,

780
00:39:34,880 --> 00:39:38,640
Speaker 1: you know what, like, I love this person, and you

781
00:39:38,680 --> 00:39:40,400
Speaker 1: got to pick and choose your battles, and this is

782
00:39:40,440 --> 00:39:42,840
Speaker 1: one that I don't care to win, and you just

783
00:39:43,640 --> 00:39:45,799
Speaker 1: push it to the side and you go and give

784
00:39:45,800 --> 00:39:47,600
Speaker 1: your partner a kiss and just say, Babe, I love

785
00:39:47,640 --> 00:39:50,240
Speaker 1: you and I'm sorry that I was not my best self.

786
00:39:50,960 --> 00:39:54,440
Speaker 1: And hopefully he embraces you the way Amigo has because

787
00:39:54,440 --> 00:39:57,160
Speaker 1: that's important because that gives you a safe place.

788
00:39:57,880 --> 00:39:59,920
Speaker 3: Yeah, thank you, babe for.

789
00:40:00,080 --> 00:40:03,680
Speaker 1: Being on the podcast. It was a beautiful conversation, So

790
00:40:03,760 --> 00:40:05,879
Speaker 1: thank you for being on. People love to hear from us,

791
00:40:05,960 --> 00:40:12,000
Speaker 1: and I'm excited to celebrate many one year anniversaries with you.

792
00:40:12,680 --> 00:40:14,880
Speaker 2: Yeah, Okay, because.

793
00:40:14,680 --> 00:40:16,560
Speaker 1: I wanted to feel like the first year all the time.

794
00:40:16,400 --> 00:40:17,040
Speaker 3: If not better.

795
00:40:17,360 --> 00:40:18,680
Speaker 2: I know, I know what you want.

796
00:40:18,760 --> 00:40:22,719
Speaker 1: I can see up a Sando baby. Okay, basically that's

797
00:40:22,719 --> 00:40:23,680
Speaker 1: why I wrote you that song.

798
00:40:24,040 --> 00:40:24,399
Speaker 2: I know.

799
00:40:26,239 --> 00:40:26,759
Speaker 3: I love you.

800
00:40:26,800 --> 00:40:28,640
Speaker 1: Thank you guys so much for listening to the pod.

801
00:40:29,400 --> 00:40:32,000
Speaker 1: If I could just ask you for something, just pray.

802
00:40:32,520 --> 00:40:34,920
Speaker 1: Pray for your girl, Pray for her marriage, pray for

803
00:40:34,960 --> 00:40:38,400
Speaker 1: her womb. Send me positive vibes. I love you, guys,

804
00:40:38,480 --> 00:40:42,400
Speaker 1: and I'm really grateful that you guys choose to listen

805
00:40:42,640 --> 00:40:51,760
Speaker 1: to Cheeky's and Chill Aroma Baby. This is a production

806
00:40:51,920 --> 00:40:56,160
Speaker 1: of iHeartRadio and the Micaela Podcast Network. Follow us on

807
00:40:56,200 --> 00:40:59,560
Speaker 1: Instagram at Michael Dourha Podcasts, then follow me Cheeky's That's

808
00:40:59,600 --> 00:41:00,520
Speaker 1: c A h I.

809
00:41:00,440 --> 00:41:01,239
Speaker 2: Q U i s.

810
00:41:01,719 --> 00:41:06,160
Speaker 1: For more podcasts from iHeart, visit the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts,

811
00:41:06,239 --> 00:41:08,480
Speaker 1: or wherever you listen to your favorite podcast