WEBVTT - Short Stuff: Backyard Burials

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<v Speaker 1>Hello, and welcome to the Short Stuff. I'm Josh, there's Chuck,

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<v Speaker 1>There's Jerry. This is short Stuff. Getty up. So a

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<v Speaker 1>while back we did a podcast. Um, I'm not even

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<v Speaker 1>sure which one it was, but you said that your

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<v Speaker 1>ultimate wish was to be Uh was it fired from

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<v Speaker 1>a cannon? Yeah? Yeah, that's like so like yesterday's news.

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<v Speaker 1>Then yeah, what's your current plan? Um? I actually am

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<v Speaker 1>still in the process of figuring that out. Again. I

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<v Speaker 1>am trying to figure out just how much or what

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<v Speaker 1>parts of my body might be donated to science, uh

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<v Speaker 1>if any I've kind of been creeped out by a

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<v Speaker 1>lot of the stories where it's like we found a

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<v Speaker 1>head in the woods and it was clearly surgically removed

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<v Speaker 1>and I guess the people who it was donated too

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<v Speaker 1>didn't need it anymore, so they just dumped it in

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<v Speaker 1>the woods kind of stuff, right, And you don't want

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<v Speaker 1>to one day become a soccer ball for a wildlife.

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<v Speaker 1>But the weird thing is is like when I read

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<v Speaker 1>about stuff like what we're about to talk about, I'm like, well,

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<v Speaker 1>it doesn't matter if this land gets subdivided a hundred

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<v Speaker 1>years from now and somebody accidentally digs up the grave.

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<v Speaker 1>Who cares? So it's weird, like part of me is

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<v Speaker 1>very precious about what happens to me after I die,

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<v Speaker 1>and another part of me is like, it does not matter. Yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>I'm in that camp still. I I have an alarming

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<v Speaker 1>amount of um or a lack of reverence for human

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<v Speaker 1>corpse after they're they're gone. I know I've seen you

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<v Speaker 1>p on one before. Now I wouldn't do that, but

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<v Speaker 1>it just I don't know, man, I just think that

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<v Speaker 1>once you're gone, you're gone, So you know, burn me up,

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<v Speaker 1>ash me up, spread me around someplace. I liked cut

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<v Speaker 1>you into lines and snort you up. I did bury

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<v Speaker 1>my cat Lauren in the backyard, but all of our

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<v Speaker 1>other animals have been cremated. And Emily didn't love the

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<v Speaker 1>idea of bearing Lauren, but she was like, he's your cat.

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<v Speaker 1>You do what you want, and I like, I like

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<v Speaker 1>him being out there. Yeah, I'm with you. So there's

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<v Speaker 1>really no beef that you're gonna get from anybody for

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<v Speaker 1>burying Lauren in the backyard. And by the way, r

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<v Speaker 1>I p Laurent. He was one of the great ones.

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<v Speaker 1>But um if Laurent had been say your father for

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<v Speaker 1>your brother or something like that. Let's go with my brother. Okay,

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<v Speaker 1>if Lauren had been your brother, if Lauren was Scott,

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<v Speaker 1>and you tried to bury Scott in your yard, but

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<v Speaker 1>you would have probably run into some issues with the authorities.

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<v Speaker 1>At the very least, your neighbors would have been rather

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<v Speaker 1>upset with you, and they could have called the cops

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<v Speaker 1>on you, and the cops would have been like, dig

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<v Speaker 1>your brother up, and that would be that. And I'd

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<v Speaker 1>dig up Laurn and be like here he is, right,

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<v Speaker 1>Blio switcher too. Yeah, Well, this is definitely an old

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<v Speaker 1>prairie kind of thing, the idea of bearing relatives on

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<v Speaker 1>your land. Um, and it is still really very much

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<v Speaker 1>legal in a lot of states. California won't let you

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<v Speaker 1>because I guess the real estate is just super valuable

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<v Speaker 1>in that. They said that are concerns that in the future,

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<v Speaker 1>like you were talking about, if they subdivide their land

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<v Speaker 1>to sell parcels and plots, that someone might be disturbed. Uh.

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<v Speaker 1>Washington State, Indiana and Washington d C. Is on record

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<v Speaker 1>is just being like there's no room. Sorry, right, barrier

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<v Speaker 1>dead in Virginia probably so right sore so that, but

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<v Speaker 1>anywhere else you can if you own enough land bury

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<v Speaker 1>anybody you want to on your land, especially a family member.

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<v Speaker 1>I think that probably greases the wheels a little more

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<v Speaker 1>if you're actually a blood relative or relative by marriage

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<v Speaker 1>of them. But there are some rules that you have

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<v Speaker 1>to follow no matter what. But one of the first

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<v Speaker 1>questions you want to ask yourself before you actually do

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<v Speaker 1>this is do I really want to do this? Because

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<v Speaker 1>if you're not planning on, you know, spending your your

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<v Speaker 1>dying days on this piece of property and handing it

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<v Speaker 1>down to your your kid who wants that property, there's

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<v Speaker 1>a good chance you might want to sell that property

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<v Speaker 1>in the future, and it may it may affect the

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<v Speaker 1>resale of that house and property knowing that there's a

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<v Speaker 1>dead body buried in what's now a cemetery on your land. Yeah.

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<v Speaker 1>Like I got to give my house one day to

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<v Speaker 1>my daughter and she's like, uh, gross, Uncle Scott and

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<v Speaker 1>Laurnner back there right, No thanks, And why did you

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<v Speaker 1>make them share the same great? Yeah, it's under the

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<v Speaker 1>bird bath, it really is. Um. So if you were

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<v Speaker 1>going to do this, uh, And we'll get into the

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<v Speaker 1>nitpicky details after the break, but there are definitely going

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<v Speaker 1>to be nitpicky details. You can't just say, well, it's

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<v Speaker 1>legal in my state. Here we go, give me a shouble. Um.

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<v Speaker 1>There are rules and regulations depending on the state and

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<v Speaker 1>the county or the district that you're in. Um, they're

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<v Speaker 1>definitely gonna be setbacks, like you can't bury it right

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<v Speaker 1>next to your property line or next to a stream

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<v Speaker 1>because it's pretty Um, it's gonna have to be well

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<v Speaker 1>away from the water table any kind of water, and

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<v Speaker 1>any kind of building or adjoining properties. Yeah, which are

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<v Speaker 1>I mean, really good things to keep in mind. You

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<v Speaker 1>don't want the could ever fouling up the local water

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<v Speaker 1>supply basically, so you want to take a break and

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<v Speaker 1>then come back and get into the real deeds. Let's

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<v Speaker 1>do it. Okay, okay, Chuck. So you've donned your overalls

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<v Speaker 1>and taking your shoes off, got a little thing of

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<v Speaker 1>grain in your teeth, and you're saying, I'm ready to

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<v Speaker 1>bury a loved one. Just give me one first, which

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<v Speaker 1>I would not do barefoot. You wouldn't know. So there

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<v Speaker 1>there are some states where you can just basically do that.

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<v Speaker 1>You can show up at the hospital or the hospit

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<v Speaker 1>this or wherever your deceased loved one is and say, hey,

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<v Speaker 1>I'm a blood relative. Here's proof, give me the body.

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<v Speaker 1>Put the body in your station wagon, and take it

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<v Speaker 1>to your house and bury it, depending on the time

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<v Speaker 1>frame of when all this happens, and again where you live. Yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>I mean, I looked up Georgia just out of curiosity,

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<v Speaker 1>and I found a few little interesting tidbits. But one

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<v Speaker 1>of them is that. And imagine it's like this. In

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<v Speaker 1>a lot of states, embalming is is not a state law. Uh.

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<v Speaker 1>Funeral directors do that because they have a body for

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<v Speaker 1>you know, a period of time sometimes before the the

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<v Speaker 1>actual burial or ceremony or whatever you're gonna do. So

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<v Speaker 1>they inbalm for that reason. But you're not required by

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<v Speaker 1>law to embalm a body. And if refrigeration is okay,

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<v Speaker 1>But even if it's within a really short time span,

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<v Speaker 1>you may not even have to refrigerate a body, right.

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<v Speaker 1>Typically in states that allow you to take possession of

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<v Speaker 1>the body yourself and handle a burial yourself as family,

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<v Speaker 1>they usually say about twenty four hours. And actually I

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<v Speaker 1>shouldn't even say about within twenty four hours. If you

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<v Speaker 1>bury the body within twenty fours you don't have to

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<v Speaker 1>embolve it. You don't have to refrigerate it. You can

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<v Speaker 1>just again go to the hospital, put in your station wagon,

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<v Speaker 1>bring it home and bury it. Probably, just to be smart,

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<v Speaker 1>you should dig the whole first, dig the grave first,

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<v Speaker 1>have it ready. It's not very cinematic, but sure, no, no, no,

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<v Speaker 1>it really is. And now that I think about, usually

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<v Speaker 1>dig the hole with the body right there, you know,

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<v Speaker 1>right exactly. And also, if you're gonna do this, just

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<v Speaker 1>a little tip from us, like make sure that somebody

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<v Speaker 1>can see you, and that they see you like nervously

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<v Speaker 1>looking over your shoulder a lot. And maybe let's do

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<v Speaker 1>this at like dusk or night time. Okay, right exactly. Um,

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<v Speaker 1>And here's the thing you're also gonna have to be

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<v Speaker 1>You're also gonna have to create an easement for your property.

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<v Speaker 1>And that doesn't mean you have to pay like a

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<v Speaker 1>a concrete path that leads to the grave, but it

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<v Speaker 1>you do have to provide for some sort of future

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<v Speaker 1>public access to that grape site, right exactly, like like

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<v Speaker 1>it has to be on the d that that is

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<v Speaker 1>a possibility. Um. There are some states who say no, no, no,

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<v Speaker 1>the funeral directing lobby is far too powerful in our state.

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<v Speaker 1>You have to hire a funeral director. UM. It varies

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<v Speaker 1>on a spectrum of just how involved the funeral director

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<v Speaker 1>has to be. In some states, the funeral director would

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<v Speaker 1>have to take possession of the body or would at

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<v Speaker 1>least have to file the death certificate. In other states

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<v Speaker 1>it's like a total free for all, like you can

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<v Speaker 1>handle all that, but you do have to file a

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<v Speaker 1>death certificate, which from what this article says, I think

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<v Speaker 1>Dave Ru's actually wrote this for on how stuff works. UM.

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<v Speaker 1>He says that there are no funeral police, but they

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<v Speaker 1>typically want you to um file it within I think

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<v Speaker 1>five days of death. Um. But you just have to file.

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<v Speaker 1>It's one of those things that has to get done.

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<v Speaker 1>So there's a lot of stuff, a lot of responsibility

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<v Speaker 1>you take on when a loved one dies and you say,

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<v Speaker 1>I'm just gonna bury him in the backyard. Yeah, And

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<v Speaker 1>this was another little thing that I would never have

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<v Speaker 1>thought about out or considered. Um. This is like a

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<v Speaker 1>county clerk, so they have regular business hours. So if

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<v Speaker 1>this happens at one on a Friday, you're not gonna

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<v Speaker 1>be able to file that certificate until Monday. But if

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<v Speaker 1>you're a funeral director, you can party seven, right and

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<v Speaker 1>just file it electronically, which I would guess would be

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<v Speaker 1>the big advantage of working with the funeral director. And

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<v Speaker 1>the best way to do this also if you're gonna

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<v Speaker 1>handle it yourself, is to be waiting outside of the

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<v Speaker 1>county clerk's office that when they show up the next

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<v Speaker 1>morning and be covered in gore and grave dirt, waiting

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<v Speaker 1>to file this death's death certificate and they're like, I

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<v Speaker 1>gotta give my coffee first, mondays um, So bearing a

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<v Speaker 1>body you always hear about, you know, six ft under

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<v Speaker 1>that's the sort of rule of thumb. Um. That's actually

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<v Speaker 1>not the law in most places, only New Mexico as

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<v Speaker 1>far as the United States, where it's legal to bury

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<v Speaker 1>about in your backyard require six ft um. New Jersey

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<v Speaker 1>is four. It's astounding to me, but most states are

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<v Speaker 1>between eighteen and that. But see that to me makes

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<v Speaker 1>the most sense. Like six ft you're removing all the

0:10:10.640 --> 0:10:14.439
<v Speaker 1>um body from a lot of the aerobic processes that

0:10:14.480 --> 0:10:17.720
<v Speaker 1>happen in soil, right, So all you're doing is prolonging

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<v Speaker 1>this decomposition where I guess if you're trying to decompose

0:10:22.120 --> 0:10:26.120
<v Speaker 1>the body, shallow or grave is a better bet. But

0:10:26.880 --> 0:10:29.680
<v Speaker 1>you're you're walking a balancing act here, Like you wanted

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<v Speaker 1>to be shallow enough so that the soil is it's

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<v Speaker 1>like part of the soil, but not so shallow that say, like, um,

0:10:37.679 --> 0:10:40.040
<v Speaker 1>coyote is going to come along and be like, oh yes,

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<v Speaker 1>and dig it up because you can smell it. Yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>which we have in our neighborhood. There are coyotes all

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<v Speaker 1>over Atlanta. They're everywhere. Um. I have buried Laurent I

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<v Speaker 1>feel like a couple of feet because I wanted to

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<v Speaker 1>make sure that he, like, the whole idea was that

0:10:54.840 --> 0:10:58.200
<v Speaker 1>he became part of the land. And uh, quite frankly,

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<v Speaker 1>I didn't want to dig any further than I'm being honest.

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<v Speaker 1>That's when I hit that really hard clay pan. But

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<v Speaker 1>you don't want a smell, And apparently eighteen thirty will

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<v Speaker 1>take care of that. That's enough. That's that's what my

0:11:12.320 --> 0:11:15.760
<v Speaker 1>dad always said. That's right. Um. And then so one

0:11:15.840 --> 0:11:17.800
<v Speaker 1>of the other things, one of the last things is um,

0:11:17.880 --> 0:11:23.040
<v Speaker 1>when you do this, you um are by definition your

0:11:23.120 --> 0:11:26.200
<v Speaker 1>land becomes a cemetery. That's like you don't go in

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<v Speaker 1>and say I need to file this little plot of

0:11:28.320 --> 0:11:31.240
<v Speaker 1>land as a cemetery. Just the act of burying somebody

0:11:31.480 --> 0:11:34.200
<v Speaker 1>legally on your land, that portion of your land because

0:11:34.240 --> 0:11:36.920
<v Speaker 1>the cemetery, so it's it's protected by all sorts of

0:11:37.400 --> 0:11:40.680
<v Speaker 1>um you know laws and anti desecration laws and cemetery

0:11:40.760 --> 0:11:43.360
<v Speaker 1>laws and actually these laws like go back to Roman

0:11:43.400 --> 0:11:47.040
<v Speaker 1>times from what from what I saw, UM. But to

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<v Speaker 1>do that you need to file it with your UM.

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<v Speaker 1>There's usually like a cemetery or some sort of commission

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<v Speaker 1>that keeps track of all the graves in the town

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<v Speaker 1>and and has some giant book. Yeah, that's kind of

0:11:59.720 --> 0:12:02.320
<v Speaker 1>the cool this thing. It's a giant book, the black

0:12:02.440 --> 0:12:05.720
<v Speaker 1>book covered in dust with gold leafing all around it,

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<v Speaker 1>and when you open it it makes a giant echoe

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<v Speaker 1>thud when you open it. It does wow when you

0:12:13.920 --> 0:12:16.760
<v Speaker 1>open it. In the you know, down the middle, let's

0:12:16.760 --> 0:12:19.200
<v Speaker 1>say I got to yeah, yeah, and then a creaky

0:12:19.200 --> 0:12:23.240
<v Speaker 1>old finger with a yellow fingernail runs down until it's

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<v Speaker 1>the spot where they're going to enter your name in

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<v Speaker 1>blood and says, excellent, Well, let's sit huh. Yeah, that's

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<v Speaker 1>all I got. It's uh, it's an interesting option, that's

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<v Speaker 1>all I'm gonna say. Yeah. Maybe if you're thinking of

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<v Speaker 1>doing this, look into all the laws first, agreed. Uh, well,

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<v Speaker 1>thank you very much for joining us on short stuff.

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<v Speaker 1>This is the end of this short stuff. Stuff you

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<v Speaker 1>should know is production of iHeart Radios How stuff works.

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