1 00:00:02,600 --> 00:00:03,480 Speaker 1: Good afternoon. 2 00:00:04,000 --> 00:00:05,960 Speaker 2: Hello are you Are you British? 3 00:00:05,960 --> 00:00:09,480 Speaker 1: So I think it was like a combination of Australian 4 00:00:09,640 --> 00:00:10,200 Speaker 1: and British. 5 00:00:10,240 --> 00:00:15,560 Speaker 3: Yeah, that's just Madonna. 6 00:00:16,840 --> 00:00:18,800 Speaker 1: I do wish I was British sometimes I just love 7 00:00:18,800 --> 00:00:19,680 Speaker 1: a British accent. 8 00:00:20,960 --> 00:00:22,040 Speaker 2: Why do they sound smarter? 9 00:00:22,640 --> 00:00:25,880 Speaker 1: Well, just maybe a little more refined. Yeah, I do 10 00:00:25,960 --> 00:00:27,720 Speaker 1: think I was British in a past life because I 11 00:00:27,760 --> 00:00:31,920 Speaker 1: have obsessions with all things British culture, and so, you know, 12 00:00:32,080 --> 00:00:33,440 Speaker 1: sometimes it just comes out, you. 13 00:00:33,360 --> 00:00:35,240 Speaker 2: Know, I mean, yeah, it's. 14 00:00:35,640 --> 00:00:40,720 Speaker 1: Sometimes it's Cajun sounding and sometimes it's British. I mean whenever. Well, 15 00:00:40,840 --> 00:00:43,560 Speaker 1: happy Friday you guys. I talked to Chip. 16 00:00:43,600 --> 00:00:43,839 Speaker 2: I was. 17 00:00:43,920 --> 00:00:46,520 Speaker 1: I gave you a copy of this book actually by 18 00:00:47,040 --> 00:00:49,800 Speaker 1: Harry Cohen, and it was Be the Sun Not the 19 00:00:49,920 --> 00:00:53,400 Speaker 1: sal And I talked to doctor Harry Cohen on Wednesday's podcast. 20 00:00:54,240 --> 00:00:57,360 Speaker 1: I did tell you I was reading this book thinking 21 00:00:57,400 --> 00:00:59,640 Speaker 1: to myself, this is for first of all, this is 22 00:00:59,760 --> 00:01:02,720 Speaker 1: just Chip, and this is just like my boyfriend, because 23 00:01:02,760 --> 00:01:05,240 Speaker 1: both of you guys are sevens on the Enneagram, and 24 00:01:05,280 --> 00:01:09,040 Speaker 1: you bring such a positive energy to everything you do, 25 00:01:09,440 --> 00:01:11,280 Speaker 1: and that's kind of what this book is about. It's 26 00:01:11,280 --> 00:01:15,600 Speaker 1: a daily kind of reader reminder of the small things 27 00:01:15,720 --> 00:01:17,880 Speaker 1: you can do in your day, in your life, in 28 00:01:17,920 --> 00:01:22,040 Speaker 1: your relationships that will better your life. And also everyone 29 00:01:22,040 --> 00:01:24,640 Speaker 1: else is around you. But you texted me and you go, 30 00:01:24,760 --> 00:01:25,480 Speaker 1: I feel seen. 31 00:01:25,520 --> 00:01:30,000 Speaker 2: I feel seen. I'd never heard of the word heliotropic before. 32 00:01:30,480 --> 00:01:32,240 Speaker 1: We'll tell the listeners what that means. 33 00:01:32,680 --> 00:01:36,480 Speaker 3: The heliotropic effect is the tendency for all living systems 34 00:01:36,480 --> 00:01:40,360 Speaker 3: to be drawn to energy that sustains its life. Like gravity, 35 00:01:40,440 --> 00:01:44,480 Speaker 3: the heliotropic effect is a powerful, invisible force that we 36 00:01:44,520 --> 00:01:48,680 Speaker 3: can harness if we understand it. So it's basically like 37 00:01:49,520 --> 00:01:52,400 Speaker 3: radiating light, you know, yeah, and then being. 38 00:01:52,280 --> 00:01:56,720 Speaker 1: Positivity gravitating towards you because you have a light about 39 00:01:56,800 --> 00:01:59,680 Speaker 1: you or the energy around you is positive, and it 40 00:01:59,760 --> 00:02:03,480 Speaker 1: does that feel heavy or bring you down. And you 41 00:02:03,520 --> 00:02:05,640 Speaker 1: and I were talking about this after and we're like, 42 00:02:05,960 --> 00:02:10,040 Speaker 1: this is literally what we feel on a day today. 43 00:02:10,600 --> 00:02:13,800 Speaker 1: And in our society, it's really hard to not escape 44 00:02:13,960 --> 00:02:16,120 Speaker 1: the salt. Like if we're saying, be the sun, not 45 00:02:16,200 --> 00:02:18,720 Speaker 1: the salt. Right now, there feels like there's a lot 46 00:02:18,800 --> 00:02:23,440 Speaker 1: of salt everywhere social media politics, and it's just so 47 00:02:23,639 --> 00:02:27,160 Speaker 1: interesting because it's almost like salt cells and sun doesn't. 48 00:02:27,560 --> 00:02:29,520 Speaker 2: But I'm guilty of it. That's it. 49 00:02:30,040 --> 00:02:32,560 Speaker 3: Yeah, I'm look, I know that when I go to 50 00:02:32,600 --> 00:02:36,000 Speaker 3: look at the news, I click on all the horrible headlines. Yeah, 51 00:02:36,040 --> 00:02:39,040 Speaker 3: like I'm like bus crash, fifty eight people dead. 52 00:02:39,160 --> 00:02:40,280 Speaker 2: I need to know about that. 53 00:02:40,560 --> 00:02:43,840 Speaker 3: And it's just like when I think back, I mean 54 00:02:43,960 --> 00:02:45,840 Speaker 3: a I try not to read the news anymore because 55 00:02:45,880 --> 00:02:48,960 Speaker 3: I just can't stomach it. But I think back to it, 56 00:02:49,040 --> 00:02:53,880 Speaker 3: I'm like, what was that doing to me internally, you know, emotionally, 57 00:02:54,960 --> 00:02:56,680 Speaker 3: to just want to read the bad news? 58 00:02:57,000 --> 00:02:59,240 Speaker 1: Well, I think it keeps us. If we're talking in 59 00:02:59,360 --> 00:03:04,520 Speaker 1: terms of like a psychology thinking mindset, I would say 60 00:03:04,520 --> 00:03:06,919 Speaker 1: it probably keeps us in fight or flight. So once 61 00:03:06,960 --> 00:03:09,960 Speaker 1: your nervous system gets activated, you almost are drawn to 62 00:03:10,040 --> 00:03:13,560 Speaker 1: these things that continue that pattern because it feels familiar. 63 00:03:14,160 --> 00:03:16,799 Speaker 1: So we're doing these things subconsciously, but it doesn't really 64 00:03:16,840 --> 00:03:20,079 Speaker 1: make us feel good. I think everyone's probably been in 65 00:03:20,120 --> 00:03:22,600 Speaker 1: some state of fight or flight since the pandemic, whether 66 00:03:22,639 --> 00:03:25,320 Speaker 1: you want to believe it or accept that or not, 67 00:03:26,040 --> 00:03:28,680 Speaker 1: we have all gone through this collective trauma. There's so 68 00:03:28,840 --> 00:03:33,400 Speaker 1: much fighting happening everywhere, and like you just mentioned, like 69 00:03:33,440 --> 00:03:35,360 Speaker 1: we didn't used to see that kind of stuff all 70 00:03:35,360 --> 00:03:37,840 Speaker 1: the time, we weren't reading about every single thing that 71 00:03:37,920 --> 00:03:40,200 Speaker 1: happened in the world all the time. 72 00:03:40,320 --> 00:03:42,400 Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean, news is now a twenty four hour 73 00:03:42,480 --> 00:03:45,120 Speaker 3: cycle at us. At least when we were growing up, 74 00:03:45,120 --> 00:03:46,800 Speaker 3: it wasn't like the news came on at. 75 00:03:46,800 --> 00:03:48,120 Speaker 1: Six o'clock and the ten o'clock. 76 00:03:48,320 --> 00:03:50,440 Speaker 3: You read the paper in the morning and it came 77 00:03:50,480 --> 00:03:53,200 Speaker 3: on at five six and then again right before bed, 78 00:03:53,560 --> 00:03:54,160 Speaker 3: so you had. 79 00:03:54,040 --> 00:03:56,760 Speaker 1: Some control about what you were receiving and taking in, 80 00:03:56,880 --> 00:04:00,920 Speaker 1: like you said. And now it's just our brains are 81 00:04:00,960 --> 00:04:07,120 Speaker 1: easily accessible to these news outlets or trolls online or 82 00:04:07,160 --> 00:04:10,040 Speaker 1: whatever it is all the time because of the social 83 00:04:10,040 --> 00:04:13,200 Speaker 1: media world. And it's like also it's just emails, Like 84 00:04:13,240 --> 00:04:16,680 Speaker 1: I'm subscribed to certain emails from different newspapers and things 85 00:04:16,760 --> 00:04:19,479 Speaker 1: like that, so you're constantly getting it in there too. 86 00:04:19,520 --> 00:04:21,359 Speaker 1: When I really think about it, it just feels like 87 00:04:21,400 --> 00:04:22,520 Speaker 1: it's everywhere you turn. 88 00:04:23,200 --> 00:04:25,919 Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean, I wrote I have a subscription to 89 00:04:26,000 --> 00:04:29,000 Speaker 3: Rolling Stone because I'm a music junkie, and I don't 90 00:04:29,040 --> 00:04:33,080 Speaker 3: think like maybe ten percent of their headlines that I 91 00:04:33,080 --> 00:04:34,839 Speaker 3: get emailed are music centric. 92 00:04:35,240 --> 00:04:36,120 Speaker 1: That's so wild. 93 00:04:36,240 --> 00:04:37,520 Speaker 2: It's all politics now. 94 00:04:37,880 --> 00:04:41,960 Speaker 3: Yeah, politics has become entertainment, you know, And I think 95 00:04:42,000 --> 00:04:45,000 Speaker 3: that's why it is dangerous and bad for us. 96 00:04:44,920 --> 00:04:48,719 Speaker 2: Because being a villain in politics. 97 00:04:48,160 --> 00:04:51,520 Speaker 3: Now is like being a villain in a Hollywood film, 98 00:04:51,839 --> 00:04:54,920 Speaker 3: and everyone wants to write about it, and we've all 99 00:04:54,960 --> 00:04:57,120 Speaker 3: grown up loving those types of movies. 100 00:04:57,400 --> 00:05:00,640 Speaker 2: But like, where the fucking heroes today we like happen? 101 00:05:00,839 --> 00:05:03,960 Speaker 1: Right, That's what maybe we're arguing about, is who can 102 00:05:04,000 --> 00:05:06,160 Speaker 1: be the hero? But the truth is it feels like 103 00:05:06,200 --> 00:05:08,600 Speaker 1: we're watching a bad reality TV show to me, and 104 00:05:08,640 --> 00:05:11,760 Speaker 1: it's actually real life though, Like that's what people don't 105 00:05:11,839 --> 00:05:14,440 Speaker 1: understand about reality TV as we talk about this a lot, 106 00:05:14,480 --> 00:05:19,840 Speaker 1: like it's not necessarily exactly realistic if you will, I mean, 107 00:05:19,839 --> 00:05:22,560 Speaker 1: it's parts part of it is realistic, but then it's 108 00:05:23,240 --> 00:05:26,760 Speaker 1: fabricated for TV or amplified for TV or done a 109 00:05:26,839 --> 00:05:30,000 Speaker 1: certain way for TV, and then that's what's happening in 110 00:05:30,040 --> 00:05:33,640 Speaker 1: our political world, it feels like, except that it's the 111 00:05:33,880 --> 00:05:37,680 Speaker 1: outcomes are actually real life, Like it's impacting real life 112 00:05:37,720 --> 00:05:42,120 Speaker 1: things that are big and dangerous and scary. So it 113 00:05:42,240 --> 00:05:45,039 Speaker 1: is a big deal. It's not just shouldn't just be 114 00:05:45,160 --> 00:05:48,640 Speaker 1: tabloid fodder or something to get your popcorn out for 115 00:05:48,960 --> 00:05:52,880 Speaker 1: and just watch villains or fake heroes or whatever. 116 00:05:53,120 --> 00:05:56,280 Speaker 3: You know, it's just become a dangerous game that is 117 00:05:56,320 --> 00:05:58,440 Speaker 3: better ignored maybe, but. 118 00:05:58,400 --> 00:05:59,800 Speaker 1: It's hard because you feel like you need to be 119 00:05:59,800 --> 00:06:02,960 Speaker 1: in It's a fine line. There's two sides of this coin. 120 00:06:03,120 --> 00:06:05,120 Speaker 1: So I mean, we had talked about it on a 121 00:06:05,120 --> 00:06:08,840 Speaker 1: political scale at first, and I'll talk about it in 122 00:06:08,920 --> 00:06:11,720 Speaker 1: a second why that came up for us. But it's 123 00:06:11,760 --> 00:06:14,160 Speaker 1: hard because I don't really like to talk about politics 124 00:06:14,200 --> 00:06:18,240 Speaker 1: on this podcast. I don't like to feel like I'm 125 00:06:18,279 --> 00:06:21,919 Speaker 1: taking one side and we can't have listeners who voted 126 00:06:21,920 --> 00:06:24,640 Speaker 1: the other way or anything like that. Like I actually 127 00:06:24,640 --> 00:06:27,320 Speaker 1: think that defeats the whole purpose of living in a 128 00:06:27,360 --> 00:06:31,239 Speaker 1: democracy that everyone can have their own opinion. I'm also 129 00:06:31,440 --> 00:06:36,280 Speaker 1: not a political analyst or anything like that, now, are you. 130 00:06:37,000 --> 00:06:40,599 Speaker 1: It's completely opinion based and it just feels like I 131 00:06:40,640 --> 00:06:43,320 Speaker 1: don't want to add to the noise of that, and 132 00:06:43,560 --> 00:06:47,040 Speaker 1: it's hard to ignore because it's everywhere. So without taking sides, 133 00:06:47,080 --> 00:06:49,280 Speaker 1: I do try to like mention the things that are 134 00:06:49,320 --> 00:06:52,760 Speaker 1: impacting us, but not necessarily go so hard in the paint. 135 00:06:52,800 --> 00:06:55,799 Speaker 1: I think we've just it's a hard like we've gone 136 00:06:55,800 --> 00:06:57,560 Speaker 1: back and forth on this on how to talk about 137 00:06:57,600 --> 00:07:00,400 Speaker 1: it and whatever. But you had sent me a T 138 00:07:00,560 --> 00:07:03,520 Speaker 1: shirt the other day because we were talking about I 139 00:07:03,520 --> 00:07:06,680 Speaker 1: actually don't even remember why. What was the topic that 140 00:07:06,720 --> 00:07:07,520 Speaker 1: you sent that for. 141 00:07:07,960 --> 00:07:09,120 Speaker 2: I can't even remember. 142 00:07:09,640 --> 00:07:11,680 Speaker 1: You were mad about something our current president did. 143 00:07:12,200 --> 00:07:15,600 Speaker 3: Yes, well, I mean it started with the tesla ad 144 00:07:15,680 --> 00:07:16,800 Speaker 3: that he Oh that's what. 145 00:07:16,800 --> 00:07:20,119 Speaker 1: It was, That's what it was. Sorry, yeah, yeah, again, 146 00:07:20,320 --> 00:07:23,800 Speaker 1: whatever you believe politically, like that's on you and this 147 00:07:23,880 --> 00:07:25,760 Speaker 1: is on us and whatever, Like I don't. I think 148 00:07:25,760 --> 00:07:27,720 Speaker 1: we've got to get over not being able to have 149 00:07:27,760 --> 00:07:30,600 Speaker 1: different opinions from some people that we like. Everyone has 150 00:07:30,640 --> 00:07:33,520 Speaker 1: different value systems, like that's what I truly believe, and 151 00:07:34,280 --> 00:07:36,760 Speaker 1: the things that mattered to one person are not necessarily 152 00:07:36,800 --> 00:07:38,440 Speaker 1: going to be the things that top are the top 153 00:07:38,480 --> 00:07:40,760 Speaker 1: matters to others. So we have to respect each other, 154 00:07:40,800 --> 00:07:43,400 Speaker 1: I think. But the T shirt you said like it 155 00:07:43,400 --> 00:07:46,600 Speaker 1: was supporting a cause that you believed in. But the 156 00:07:46,640 --> 00:07:49,840 Speaker 1: T shirt to me was very negative, like it said 157 00:07:50,320 --> 00:07:53,320 Speaker 1: I didn't vote for him, and I just I've seen 158 00:07:53,360 --> 00:07:55,760 Speaker 1: this so much, and trust me, I'm not saying this 159 00:07:55,840 --> 00:07:57,520 Speaker 1: from a place of like I haven't done it too. 160 00:07:57,680 --> 00:08:00,120 Speaker 1: I think we've done it. What I'm seeing is like, 161 00:08:00,120 --> 00:08:03,880 Speaker 1: like we're not getting anywhere, because all we're doing is 162 00:08:03,920 --> 00:08:07,119 Speaker 1: trying to blame each side, and the truth is both 163 00:08:07,160 --> 00:08:11,240 Speaker 1: sides are pretty fucked up, like the extreme things are 164 00:08:11,280 --> 00:08:14,160 Speaker 1: not working. So we got to figure out a way 165 00:08:14,240 --> 00:08:16,360 Speaker 1: to like come together. And I think a lot of 166 00:08:16,360 --> 00:08:18,960 Speaker 1: people actually have beliefs somewhere in the middle, but we 167 00:08:19,160 --> 00:08:22,760 Speaker 1: just get so triggered by stuff I am included in 168 00:08:22,800 --> 00:08:25,200 Speaker 1: that that we want to just send hate back and 169 00:08:25,280 --> 00:08:27,880 Speaker 1: it's not working. Like I think we need to fight 170 00:08:27,920 --> 00:08:29,480 Speaker 1: for the causes we believe in, but I think we 171 00:08:29,560 --> 00:08:31,880 Speaker 1: got to find another way to do it. And so 172 00:08:32,040 --> 00:08:34,640 Speaker 1: for me, the T shirt saying I didn't vote for 173 00:08:34,720 --> 00:08:37,320 Speaker 1: him because I've we've had that on the other side 174 00:08:37,360 --> 00:08:40,680 Speaker 1: as well, like sent back to us. I'm like, what 175 00:08:40,840 --> 00:08:44,640 Speaker 1: is that accomplishing? So you're right there wrong, Like what 176 00:08:44,840 --> 00:08:47,400 Speaker 1: does that actually get done? And then you and I 177 00:08:47,440 --> 00:08:50,200 Speaker 1: talked about it and you're like, yeah, I actually agree, like, yeah, 178 00:08:50,320 --> 00:08:52,920 Speaker 1: that's not the kind of energy that we want to 179 00:08:52,960 --> 00:08:55,480 Speaker 1: bring to it to actually try to make changes. I'm 180 00:08:55,520 --> 00:08:57,920 Speaker 1: not saying I have the solution. I just don't think 181 00:08:57,960 --> 00:08:58,800 Speaker 1: that that's it. 182 00:08:59,400 --> 00:09:01,240 Speaker 2: Does that make sense totally? Yeah? 183 00:09:01,280 --> 00:09:04,400 Speaker 3: And it's you know, I think it's a really easy 184 00:09:04,440 --> 00:09:07,840 Speaker 3: trap to fall into to like embrace to embrace the 185 00:09:07,920 --> 00:09:11,559 Speaker 3: snark and miss the big picture. 186 00:09:11,520 --> 00:09:14,800 Speaker 1: It does are security, so we're like or we don't 187 00:09:14,800 --> 00:09:17,520 Speaker 1: feel in control, so we want to like blame somebody. 188 00:09:17,600 --> 00:09:18,920 Speaker 1: That's a normal human thing. 189 00:09:19,080 --> 00:09:19,440 Speaker 2: Totally. 190 00:09:19,520 --> 00:09:21,280 Speaker 1: Yeah, what were you about to say? 191 00:09:21,480 --> 00:09:26,319 Speaker 3: No, I'm saying like that shirt in particular, like negativity 192 00:09:26,360 --> 00:09:28,520 Speaker 3: can be wrapped up in the humor of it, you know, 193 00:09:28,640 --> 00:09:32,600 Speaker 3: the snarkiness of the shirt, and it blinds you from 194 00:09:32,640 --> 00:09:37,040 Speaker 3: the bigger picture of it being a blame game versus 195 00:09:36,400 --> 00:09:40,240 Speaker 3: it being a funny, snarky thing, because I do see 196 00:09:40,240 --> 00:09:43,480 Speaker 3: the humor in it too, or the protective qualities of 197 00:09:43,520 --> 00:09:46,280 Speaker 3: it just to be like I didn't do it, you know, 198 00:09:46,960 --> 00:09:49,400 Speaker 3: in the same way that someone would wear something positive 199 00:09:49,520 --> 00:09:52,880 Speaker 3: like a MAGA hat because they're proud of it. But 200 00:09:52,960 --> 00:09:56,480 Speaker 3: there's a maga, maga, I don't know, maga, I don't know, 201 00:09:56,480 --> 00:10:00,400 Speaker 3: maga whatever, but the MGA hat, like they wear it 202 00:10:00,400 --> 00:10:03,160 Speaker 3: because they're supportive of it. But there's also the underlying 203 00:10:03,280 --> 00:10:06,560 Speaker 3: tone of I'm better than you, you know, like. 204 00:10:06,480 --> 00:10:08,320 Speaker 1: There is it is mentally be great if we do 205 00:10:08,360 --> 00:10:09,360 Speaker 1: it this way. 206 00:10:09,200 --> 00:10:12,120 Speaker 3: Right right, And there is the element, yeah, the element 207 00:10:12,200 --> 00:10:15,040 Speaker 3: of just like where right you're wrong in the same 208 00:10:15,160 --> 00:10:18,920 Speaker 3: way it's it's not meant to be snarky, like it's 209 00:10:18,920 --> 00:10:22,480 Speaker 3: not funny, right, but it sends the same message. 210 00:10:22,600 --> 00:10:23,520 Speaker 2: Well, the truth is. 211 00:10:23,960 --> 00:10:25,720 Speaker 1: Think about if you get in a fight with someone 212 00:10:26,000 --> 00:10:30,079 Speaker 1: and you go to hard to bat at your side, 213 00:10:30,120 --> 00:10:32,960 Speaker 1: like most fights, we know this, there's two sides to 214 00:10:32,960 --> 00:10:35,600 Speaker 1: every story. The third one is typically the truth, right, 215 00:10:35,679 --> 00:10:40,040 Speaker 1: Like every fight probably has a little dose of truth 216 00:10:40,080 --> 00:10:42,720 Speaker 1: on each side, or someone's coming from a certain perspective 217 00:10:42,760 --> 00:10:46,200 Speaker 1: that makes sense for them and their journey or whatever 218 00:10:46,280 --> 00:10:49,200 Speaker 1: you want to say. So if you realize after a 219 00:10:49,240 --> 00:10:53,360 Speaker 1: fight that whatever you were saying, you're like, eh, yeah, 220 00:10:53,400 --> 00:10:56,120 Speaker 1: maybe they were right, Like I could see what they're 221 00:10:56,120 --> 00:10:59,200 Speaker 1: saying now, and you go to them and literally all 222 00:10:59,280 --> 00:11:03,760 Speaker 1: they say to you is I told you so or something. Yeah, 223 00:11:03,800 --> 00:11:07,080 Speaker 1: what does that do. There's no repair between y'all, Like, no, 224 00:11:07,400 --> 00:11:09,720 Speaker 1: not ever gonna be good. It just makes you probably 225 00:11:09,800 --> 00:11:14,120 Speaker 1: more mad and it doesn't accomplish anything. And so that's 226 00:11:14,200 --> 00:11:16,280 Speaker 1: kind of the same energy to me that is being 227 00:11:16,360 --> 00:11:18,679 Speaker 1: put out with so much of the politics as like, well, 228 00:11:18,720 --> 00:11:20,880 Speaker 1: I told you so, But it's happening on both sides, 229 00:11:20,920 --> 00:11:25,880 Speaker 1: and both sides truly believe their side is right. We 230 00:11:26,000 --> 00:11:28,240 Speaker 1: have to figure out a way I think to hear 231 00:11:28,400 --> 00:11:32,840 Speaker 1: the other side agree to disagree on some things, probably 232 00:11:32,920 --> 00:11:35,560 Speaker 1: a lot of things, but how do we work together 233 00:11:35,640 --> 00:11:38,920 Speaker 1: for the common goal and be more of the sun 234 00:11:39,280 --> 00:11:42,840 Speaker 1: with each other than just throwing more salts on the wounds, 235 00:11:42,880 --> 00:11:44,120 Speaker 1: Like it's not helping. 236 00:11:44,520 --> 00:11:47,600 Speaker 3: Yeah, it's truly causing a decay of society. 237 00:11:48,000 --> 00:11:50,240 Speaker 1: Well, it's just the pendulum keeps going back and forth. 238 00:11:50,240 --> 00:11:53,240 Speaker 3: You Yeah, and that's never You're never gonna You're never 239 00:11:53,280 --> 00:11:54,720 Speaker 3: gonna meet in the middle that way. No. 240 00:12:03,760 --> 00:12:06,000 Speaker 1: The point being to me is I'm seeing now a 241 00:12:06,000 --> 00:12:09,400 Speaker 1: lot of times now that the political environment has shifted 242 00:12:09,880 --> 00:12:13,440 Speaker 1: to the more conservative side. A lot of the people 243 00:12:13,480 --> 00:12:16,880 Speaker 1: that I follow are saying we'll see I told you 244 00:12:17,000 --> 00:12:19,400 Speaker 1: or whatever, and it's just like that T shirt. It's like, 245 00:12:19,880 --> 00:12:23,160 Speaker 1: it's just like, I don't think that that helps as 246 00:12:23,520 --> 00:12:27,040 Speaker 1: a person who is seeing things happen right now that 247 00:12:27,200 --> 00:12:30,440 Speaker 1: I don't think I voted for. If I just go, well, 248 00:12:30,480 --> 00:12:33,600 Speaker 1: I didn't vote for that. What am I helping other 249 00:12:33,679 --> 00:12:36,400 Speaker 1: than my ego? Do you know what I'm saying? Like that, 250 00:12:36,480 --> 00:12:38,840 Speaker 1: it's just a very ego base to me, and it's 251 00:12:39,000 --> 00:12:43,319 Speaker 1: very much like we're all doing the best we can 252 00:12:44,080 --> 00:12:48,320 Speaker 1: exactly like it's I told you so, it's whatever, and again, 253 00:12:48,720 --> 00:12:51,640 Speaker 1: voice your concerns if that's what it is. But can 254 00:12:51,679 --> 00:12:53,800 Speaker 1: we all try to change the way we're doing it. 255 00:12:53,880 --> 00:12:56,840 Speaker 1: That's my biggest thing. It's like, let's be able to 256 00:12:56,920 --> 00:13:00,440 Speaker 1: have a fucking adult conversation about differing a penis and 257 00:13:00,480 --> 00:13:03,840 Speaker 1: differing beliefs, because then we might actually get something done. 258 00:13:04,320 --> 00:13:08,120 Speaker 1: But the longer that we sit on these tangents of well, 259 00:13:08,200 --> 00:13:10,400 Speaker 1: I didn't do that, or that was all you, or 260 00:13:10,480 --> 00:13:12,520 Speaker 1: you voted for that not me, or you said to 261 00:13:12,559 --> 00:13:13,720 Speaker 1: do this and not me, and it's. 262 00:13:13,679 --> 00:13:17,680 Speaker 2: Like, Okay, it accomplishes nothing. It's not accomplishes nothing. 263 00:13:17,920 --> 00:13:20,360 Speaker 1: Yeah, And I think so a lot of that to 264 00:13:20,400 --> 00:13:22,320 Speaker 1: get off the political stuff and go back to social 265 00:13:22,360 --> 00:13:24,360 Speaker 1: media is like, we're seeing a lot of that on 266 00:13:24,440 --> 00:13:30,520 Speaker 1: social media. And so a research is social media negativity 267 00:13:30,960 --> 00:13:34,640 Speaker 1: rewarded over positivity? And the answer, what do you think 268 00:13:34,679 --> 00:13:34,920 Speaker 1: it is? 269 00:13:36,120 --> 00:13:38,679 Speaker 2: Hands down, it is rewarded. 270 00:13:38,400 --> 00:13:40,040 Speaker 1: Yeah, a million percent rewarded. 271 00:13:40,160 --> 00:13:40,559 Speaker 2: Yeah. 272 00:13:40,640 --> 00:13:44,079 Speaker 1: Studies have shown that negative posts often garner more engagement 273 00:13:44,120 --> 00:13:48,120 Speaker 1: than positive ones. For instance, research indicates that negative news 274 00:13:48,160 --> 00:13:54,320 Speaker 1: content increases physiological activation and is more likely to be remembered, 275 00:13:54,559 --> 00:13:57,920 Speaker 1: leading to higher share rates. Isn't that crazy? 276 00:13:58,480 --> 00:14:01,240 Speaker 3: Do you think it's like a do the mean thing 277 00:14:01,559 --> 00:14:05,839 Speaker 3: where it affects our brains in a way that like 278 00:14:06,920 --> 00:14:10,160 Speaker 3: calls this fight or flight because I can imagine like 279 00:14:10,720 --> 00:14:13,200 Speaker 3: some of the shares are like I'm forty, like if 280 00:14:13,240 --> 00:14:15,240 Speaker 3: I disagree with it, I'm pissed off. 281 00:14:15,280 --> 00:14:17,480 Speaker 2: So I'm fording because I get them all the time. 282 00:14:17,960 --> 00:14:21,840 Speaker 3: And right after the inauguration when I was unhappy, I 283 00:14:21,920 --> 00:14:24,240 Speaker 3: was having friends forward me a bunch of stuff that 284 00:14:24,400 --> 00:14:28,080 Speaker 3: like were negative, and I had to ask them like, hey, 285 00:14:28,680 --> 00:14:30,960 Speaker 3: this name is in my inbox enough and on my 286 00:14:31,200 --> 00:14:32,120 Speaker 3: screens enough. 287 00:14:32,640 --> 00:14:34,520 Speaker 2: I don't need my friends fording it. 288 00:14:34,520 --> 00:14:36,960 Speaker 1: It's not helping you, it's not helping me get it down. 289 00:14:37,040 --> 00:14:40,400 Speaker 3: So there is like a I think that the salty 290 00:14:40,480 --> 00:14:45,160 Speaker 3: things get that sort of interaction for two reasons, Whereas 291 00:14:45,200 --> 00:14:47,640 Speaker 3: it's so much easier to gloss over something positive. 292 00:14:48,360 --> 00:14:51,440 Speaker 2: You're just like, oh, yeah, it's cute, Oh that's cute. 293 00:14:51,560 --> 00:14:51,800 Speaker 3: You know. 294 00:14:52,240 --> 00:14:54,760 Speaker 1: I can only speak for myself, but what I did realize, 295 00:14:54,800 --> 00:14:57,440 Speaker 1: like my boyfriend, like I said, has a very similar 296 00:14:57,480 --> 00:15:01,480 Speaker 1: mentality to you, and he with this political environment is 297 00:15:01,520 --> 00:15:06,600 Speaker 1: like I think it's so interesting because both sides when 298 00:15:06,680 --> 00:15:09,640 Speaker 1: either if you had if Biden was your president or 299 00:15:09,640 --> 00:15:12,840 Speaker 1: if Trump is your president, that you voted for. One 300 00:15:13,240 --> 00:15:16,840 Speaker 1: side of that argument was always freaking the fuck out 301 00:15:16,880 --> 00:15:19,920 Speaker 1: that the world was over while the opposite person was 302 00:15:19,960 --> 00:15:21,840 Speaker 1: in office. If I'm not saying that right, Like, if 303 00:15:21,880 --> 00:15:25,200 Speaker 1: you're a Democrat right now, you're struggling with the Trump 304 00:15:25,240 --> 00:15:28,240 Speaker 1: being in office when you if you're super hard conservative, 305 00:15:28,400 --> 00:15:32,800 Speaker 1: you're probably struggling with Biden. And so his point to 306 00:15:32,840 --> 00:15:36,440 Speaker 1: me is always like, focus on yourself better the world. 307 00:15:36,720 --> 00:15:40,520 Speaker 1: Do like do your part of the thing, you know, 308 00:15:40,680 --> 00:15:45,040 Speaker 1: like bring sun not salt in your everyday interactions. Show 309 00:15:45,120 --> 00:15:47,160 Speaker 1: up and do the best you can. And I will 310 00:15:47,200 --> 00:15:50,880 Speaker 1: have days where I'm like, that's not gonna say right right, 311 00:15:51,160 --> 00:15:54,720 Speaker 1: so emotional that like sometimes the emotions overwhelm me. And 312 00:15:55,080 --> 00:15:57,160 Speaker 1: the more I've thought about it though, and I'm reading 313 00:15:57,160 --> 00:15:59,080 Speaker 1: this book kind of helped too. I just am like 314 00:15:59,440 --> 00:16:01,800 Speaker 1: part of that is right, because what happens for me 315 00:16:02,360 --> 00:16:06,920 Speaker 1: if I start reading about negative political news and I 316 00:16:07,160 --> 00:16:10,000 Speaker 1: get hooked on it. It's almost like I don't know 317 00:16:10,000 --> 00:16:12,280 Speaker 1: if it's like a control thing, but it's like the 318 00:16:12,320 --> 00:16:14,400 Speaker 1: more that I think my brain thinks, the more that 319 00:16:14,440 --> 00:16:17,400 Speaker 1: I read, the more in control that I'll be because 320 00:16:17,440 --> 00:16:21,760 Speaker 1: I'll be in the know of when the world's gonna end, right, 321 00:16:22,280 --> 00:16:26,800 Speaker 1: And it's like, yeah, that's not really how this works. 322 00:16:26,800 --> 00:16:29,080 Speaker 1: It's not how the universe works. But I do think 323 00:16:29,120 --> 00:16:32,720 Speaker 1: there's some sort of sense of safety and security. It's false, 324 00:16:32,800 --> 00:16:35,000 Speaker 1: but a false sense of security and safety that I'm 325 00:16:35,040 --> 00:16:38,760 Speaker 1: trying to garner by having as much information as I can. 326 00:16:39,240 --> 00:16:42,000 Speaker 1: And now that we're saying what we're saying, though, it's 327 00:16:42,080 --> 00:16:47,040 Speaker 1: like and also that gives the media and trolls online 328 00:16:47,480 --> 00:16:51,480 Speaker 1: and all of these other avenues or outlets control over 329 00:16:51,560 --> 00:16:53,240 Speaker 1: my fucking brain and my life. 330 00:16:53,560 --> 00:16:56,880 Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean, and that's what they want. I mean, 331 00:16:56,920 --> 00:16:59,560 Speaker 3: they are designed to hook you. They are designed to 332 00:16:59,560 --> 00:17:03,080 Speaker 3: be a deck if they are designed to keep you engaged, 333 00:17:03,840 --> 00:17:06,800 Speaker 3: because the more you're on it, the more they're selling ads, 334 00:17:06,920 --> 00:17:09,800 Speaker 3: the more you're clicking on things to buy, the more 335 00:17:09,880 --> 00:17:10,600 Speaker 3: the more the more. 336 00:17:11,000 --> 00:17:11,159 Speaker 2: You know. 337 00:17:11,240 --> 00:17:13,439 Speaker 3: What's funny is, while you were talking, like, all I 338 00:17:13,480 --> 00:17:16,600 Speaker 3: could think of is the old adage ignorance is. 339 00:17:16,560 --> 00:17:19,040 Speaker 2: Bliss, you know what I mean. 340 00:17:19,119 --> 00:17:21,080 Speaker 3: It's like, at what point, like when we were running 341 00:17:21,080 --> 00:17:24,359 Speaker 3: around as kids and all we knew was like fun. 342 00:17:25,680 --> 00:17:29,320 Speaker 3: We didn't have information, we had friends, we had adventures, 343 00:17:29,359 --> 00:17:31,879 Speaker 3: we had we were making shit up in our heads 344 00:17:31,920 --> 00:17:36,400 Speaker 3: and we were like happy and the world like we 345 00:17:36,400 --> 00:17:40,400 Speaker 3: weren't even aware of what was going on in Washington, DC. 346 00:17:40,920 --> 00:17:42,720 Speaker 2: And I think if. 347 00:17:43,320 --> 00:17:46,520 Speaker 3: We could all sort of approach try to approach life 348 00:17:46,520 --> 00:17:49,040 Speaker 3: a little bit more like find that kid in us 349 00:17:49,080 --> 00:17:52,200 Speaker 3: again that would run up to a stranger and hand 350 00:17:52,240 --> 00:17:54,800 Speaker 3: them a flower that they just picked, or tell someone 351 00:17:54,840 --> 00:17:58,600 Speaker 3: that they, you know, like their shirt, or just be 352 00:17:58,840 --> 00:18:02,960 Speaker 3: more sun in the world. Really, that is the weapon 353 00:18:03,200 --> 00:18:06,760 Speaker 3: that changes all of this bullshit. That's the only way forward. 354 00:18:07,040 --> 00:18:09,159 Speaker 1: But it's so funny though, because it's like what I 355 00:18:09,160 --> 00:18:13,040 Speaker 1: said to you before the podcast, I feel sometimes like 356 00:18:13,359 --> 00:18:18,760 Speaker 1: the more healthy I and my life have gotten, that 357 00:18:18,920 --> 00:18:24,080 Speaker 1: I seem more boring. Like it's almost like if you 358 00:18:24,359 --> 00:18:28,879 Speaker 1: are not operating from a high drama chaos place. I mean, 359 00:18:28,880 --> 00:18:31,560 Speaker 1: there's no entertainment value in that, right, And so it's 360 00:18:31,600 --> 00:18:35,639 Speaker 1: almost like really having to rewire our entire culture to 361 00:18:35,800 --> 00:18:42,359 Speaker 1: understand that positivity, calm lives, like consistency, the things like 362 00:18:42,520 --> 00:18:45,679 Speaker 1: the things that I changed when I changed how I dated, 363 00:18:45,800 --> 00:18:48,040 Speaker 1: like the things I was looking for in a relationship 364 00:18:48,240 --> 00:18:50,800 Speaker 1: are almost on a bigger scale what we need to 365 00:18:50,920 --> 00:18:54,320 Speaker 1: change or what might be beneficial for us to change, 366 00:18:54,600 --> 00:18:56,879 Speaker 1: But it's the same old thing of like you know, 367 00:18:57,000 --> 00:19:01,159 Speaker 1: even sex cells or the sense sationalized things or you 368 00:19:01,200 --> 00:19:02,840 Speaker 1: and I used to talk about like sometimes we would 369 00:19:02,840 --> 00:19:05,040 Speaker 1: do more shock factor kind of things, like oh, if 370 00:19:05,080 --> 00:19:08,120 Speaker 1: we tell people this, then that's enticing, and the truth is, 371 00:19:08,119 --> 00:19:09,200 Speaker 1: is it fucking works? 372 00:19:09,720 --> 00:19:12,480 Speaker 3: And like, well, we're in an attention economy, so it's 373 00:19:12,600 --> 00:19:16,760 Speaker 3: like we were doing that shit for attention, and now 374 00:19:16,880 --> 00:19:23,439 Speaker 3: this feels more intentional instead of attentional. It's we're like, 375 00:19:23,480 --> 00:19:25,680 Speaker 3: we're doing this from I don't even know if attentional 376 00:19:25,720 --> 00:19:30,760 Speaker 3: is a word, but if it isn't, trademarket, Yeah. 377 00:19:29,480 --> 00:19:30,440 Speaker 2: This is intentional. 378 00:19:30,480 --> 00:19:33,040 Speaker 3: And it's like, maybe we don't reach as many people 379 00:19:33,119 --> 00:19:34,679 Speaker 3: by doing it because we're not going to have a 380 00:19:34,720 --> 00:19:39,440 Speaker 3: moment that goes viral or whatever. But my hope is 381 00:19:39,520 --> 00:19:43,080 Speaker 3: that by us being more vulnerable and kind and positive, 382 00:19:43,640 --> 00:19:45,960 Speaker 3: that the people that we are reaching and the people 383 00:19:46,080 --> 00:19:50,280 Speaker 3: that are listening were bringing light into their day. And 384 00:19:50,440 --> 00:19:53,159 Speaker 3: I would encourage anybody who is listening that feels like 385 00:19:53,200 --> 00:19:55,480 Speaker 3: they know people that need more positivity to share this 386 00:19:55,560 --> 00:20:00,840 Speaker 3: with somebody like, because that's how that grows. And I'm 387 00:20:00,840 --> 00:20:03,800 Speaker 3: not saying that even just for like listenership and numbers 388 00:20:03,920 --> 00:20:06,560 Speaker 3: or whatever. I'm saying it because it's like, there's only 389 00:20:06,600 --> 00:20:09,119 Speaker 3: so many people a day that I can touch, you know, 390 00:20:09,240 --> 00:20:14,200 Speaker 3: personally and shine a little light on. And I agree 391 00:20:14,240 --> 00:20:15,840 Speaker 3: with you, like I feel like my life has gotten 392 00:20:15,920 --> 00:20:17,919 Speaker 3: really fucking boring lately, and. 393 00:20:17,840 --> 00:20:20,600 Speaker 2: I love it saying I don't. 394 00:20:20,359 --> 00:20:24,520 Speaker 3: Want the attention. I craved so much attention. You know, 395 00:20:24,640 --> 00:20:26,520 Speaker 3: I wanted to be popular, I wanted to be liked 396 00:20:26,520 --> 00:20:29,159 Speaker 3: by everybody. I wanted all of the things that really 397 00:20:29,280 --> 00:20:32,119 Speaker 3: don't matter. Like now, what I want is to like 398 00:20:32,200 --> 00:20:39,200 Speaker 3: myself truly deeply and know myself. And I mean I've 399 00:20:39,240 --> 00:20:41,720 Speaker 3: done all that stuff. At the end of the day, 400 00:20:41,880 --> 00:20:43,879 Speaker 3: I often felt really fucking empty. 401 00:20:44,560 --> 00:20:44,800 Speaker 2: Yeah. 402 00:20:44,840 --> 00:20:48,040 Speaker 3: I worked so hard to have nearly six thousand friends 403 00:20:48,119 --> 00:20:51,800 Speaker 3: on Facebook just to have someone steal it, you know. 404 00:20:51,720 --> 00:20:53,480 Speaker 2: What I mean, Like, what the fuck? 405 00:20:53,560 --> 00:20:55,960 Speaker 3: It meant nothing? It meant nothing, and you know how 406 00:20:56,320 --> 00:20:57,760 Speaker 3: happy I am without it now? 407 00:20:58,160 --> 00:21:00,399 Speaker 1: Yeah, I don't know. That other thing is is like 408 00:21:00,520 --> 00:21:02,840 Speaker 1: when the focus is that I think both of us 409 00:21:02,880 --> 00:21:06,160 Speaker 1: have experienced, even like this thing you just said about Facebook, 410 00:21:06,520 --> 00:21:09,320 Speaker 1: When you experience something like that, then you realize, oh 411 00:21:09,320 --> 00:21:12,640 Speaker 1: my god, I worked so hard to get to this place, 412 00:21:13,240 --> 00:21:16,280 Speaker 1: and then it's proof it's gone, you know, overnight, and 413 00:21:16,720 --> 00:21:19,000 Speaker 1: I'm still here and my life is still the same, 414 00:21:19,160 --> 00:21:21,720 Speaker 1: And what did it actually mean then? So, when you're 415 00:21:21,800 --> 00:21:25,280 Speaker 1: chasing attention or validation or all the external things as 416 00:21:25,320 --> 00:21:28,520 Speaker 1: the number one priority, it can be taken away at 417 00:21:28,520 --> 00:21:33,560 Speaker 1: any moment, and you're insatiable, you'll never have enough. I 418 00:21:33,560 --> 00:21:35,960 Speaker 1: think both of us have reached a different place now 419 00:21:36,040 --> 00:21:38,400 Speaker 1: where we're like, wait, I just want to have quality 420 00:21:38,440 --> 00:21:42,400 Speaker 1: conversations like this, for instance, if people shared, I would 421 00:21:42,440 --> 00:21:44,720 Speaker 1: just hope that people just start talking in the same 422 00:21:44,760 --> 00:21:47,040 Speaker 1: way that you and I are, just asking the questions, 423 00:21:47,080 --> 00:21:49,399 Speaker 1: Like this isn't to sit on some soapbox and be like, 424 00:21:49,480 --> 00:21:51,600 Speaker 1: let's be kind to everybody because we're so kind and 425 00:21:51,640 --> 00:21:54,440 Speaker 1: we're perfect, like neither one of us are, and we're 426 00:21:54,480 --> 00:21:57,320 Speaker 1: not trying to say that by any means. I'm just like, 427 00:21:57,800 --> 00:22:00,639 Speaker 1: what we're doing in this world, it doesn't feel like 428 00:22:00,720 --> 00:22:03,439 Speaker 1: it's working to me. That's all that I notice. So 429 00:22:03,840 --> 00:22:06,639 Speaker 1: there has to be another way. And if we haven't 430 00:22:06,680 --> 00:22:10,040 Speaker 1: done that way before, let's figure it out together, Like, 431 00:22:10,160 --> 00:22:15,280 Speaker 1: let's start asking the questions. Let's start talking about I 432 00:22:15,400 --> 00:22:17,359 Speaker 1: want to fucking ran out. I know, let's talk about 433 00:22:17,440 --> 00:22:21,400 Speaker 1: what's not working or what we feel like when we're 434 00:22:21,440 --> 00:22:25,320 Speaker 1: experiencing all these things online, in politics, whatever it is. 435 00:22:26,040 --> 00:22:28,959 Speaker 1: And I bet you most people would say I feel heavy, 436 00:22:29,000 --> 00:22:32,639 Speaker 1: I don't feel good, and isn't the goal to feel good? 437 00:22:33,000 --> 00:22:35,000 Speaker 1: Like why are we not doing the things that make 438 00:22:35,080 --> 00:22:37,040 Speaker 1: us happy and that make us feel good and then 439 00:22:37,040 --> 00:22:39,679 Speaker 1: spreading that around? And I think that's what you and 440 00:22:39,720 --> 00:22:42,600 Speaker 1: I just started to realize, like, Okay, maybe we want 441 00:22:42,600 --> 00:22:44,800 Speaker 1: to be more of the sun and not the salt. 442 00:22:44,840 --> 00:22:48,520 Speaker 1: Like I don't want to be talking about gossip and 443 00:22:48,560 --> 00:22:50,760 Speaker 1: slander and all that stuff anymore. It doesn't feel good 444 00:22:50,800 --> 00:22:52,159 Speaker 1: to me. That's why I don't want to do it. 445 00:22:52,240 --> 00:22:54,119 Speaker 1: Not because I think I'm better than anybody else. I 446 00:22:54,240 --> 00:22:57,280 Speaker 1: just literally it makes me feel bad, Like I don't 447 00:22:57,280 --> 00:22:58,679 Speaker 1: want to do it. I don't want to do things 448 00:22:58,720 --> 00:23:00,000 Speaker 1: that make me feel bad. 449 00:22:59,720 --> 00:23:03,040 Speaker 3: I don't feel like I'm better than anybody else. I 450 00:23:03,119 --> 00:23:04,119 Speaker 3: just want to be the best me. 451 00:23:04,640 --> 00:23:07,280 Speaker 1: Yeah. I talked about being on that journey lately. 452 00:23:07,040 --> 00:23:07,840 Speaker 2: Like a lot. 453 00:23:08,320 --> 00:23:13,160 Speaker 3: Yeah, I am kumbay eyeing myself, and I do think 454 00:23:13,200 --> 00:23:15,560 Speaker 3: it was because I was I was looking for the 455 00:23:15,680 --> 00:23:20,600 Speaker 3: external validation and all the while I didn't like myself, 456 00:23:21,000 --> 00:23:23,639 Speaker 3: and that was a really hard pill to swallow, to 457 00:23:23,680 --> 00:23:24,520 Speaker 3: recognize that. 458 00:23:25,119 --> 00:23:26,560 Speaker 2: And now I do like myself. 459 00:23:26,840 --> 00:23:29,960 Speaker 3: You know, I'm and every day I'm reading something to 460 00:23:30,080 --> 00:23:33,760 Speaker 3: try and stay in touch with myself. I've started journaling, 461 00:23:33,840 --> 00:23:36,600 Speaker 3: I'm doing all the things, and I you know, it's 462 00:23:36,600 --> 00:23:38,840 Speaker 3: funny too, because I've had to have some really tough 463 00:23:38,880 --> 00:23:42,320 Speaker 3: conversations with some friends lately that I don't know that 464 00:23:42,359 --> 00:23:45,240 Speaker 3: I would have had the courage to do in the past. 465 00:23:45,840 --> 00:23:50,080 Speaker 3: And it's crazy how easy it is, even when it's 466 00:23:50,080 --> 00:23:53,800 Speaker 3: a hard conversation, how easy it is when like you 467 00:23:54,040 --> 00:23:56,200 Speaker 3: know that it's coming from a place of pure love 468 00:23:57,080 --> 00:24:01,960 Speaker 3: and there is no pill on earth that can replace 469 00:24:02,000 --> 00:24:06,400 Speaker 3: that feeling. And it's also amazing when it comes back 470 00:24:06,440 --> 00:24:08,199 Speaker 3: to you and they're like, I'm so grateful that you 471 00:24:08,200 --> 00:24:09,359 Speaker 3: were honest with me about that. 472 00:24:09,920 --> 00:24:12,720 Speaker 1: Yes, yeah, what I hear you saying is that your 473 00:24:12,760 --> 00:24:15,439 Speaker 1: life is just getting deeper and so it's getting richer. 474 00:24:15,880 --> 00:24:19,040 Speaker 1: And I think that's a really great overall thing to 475 00:24:19,040 --> 00:24:22,560 Speaker 1: think about, too, is just instead of the fighting and 476 00:24:22,600 --> 00:24:24,800 Speaker 1: being so on the surface of the things, why are 477 00:24:24,840 --> 00:24:27,200 Speaker 1: we not let's start looking maybe at the root of 478 00:24:27,240 --> 00:24:29,879 Speaker 1: some like we talk about root causes with health, but 479 00:24:29,920 --> 00:24:33,160 Speaker 1: there's also root causes with mental health and less psychological 480 00:24:33,200 --> 00:24:36,399 Speaker 1: issues and happiness and all of the driving forces of 481 00:24:36,440 --> 00:24:38,760 Speaker 1: everything that we do why we do what we do. 482 00:24:39,480 --> 00:24:42,520 Speaker 1: So if you disagree with somebody, maybe look at the 483 00:24:43,000 --> 00:24:46,840 Speaker 1: root of their story and where they're coming from, and 484 00:24:46,920 --> 00:24:49,480 Speaker 1: also where you're coming from, and stop arguing about the 485 00:24:49,560 --> 00:24:52,320 Speaker 1: simple point and try to have a conversation about the 486 00:24:52,359 --> 00:24:55,439 Speaker 1: deeper thing. It's just really interesting when you start doing that, 487 00:24:55,520 --> 00:24:58,879 Speaker 1: isn't it Like your relationships get better, you feel better, 488 00:24:59,240 --> 00:25:05,040 Speaker 1: life gets better, better, all of it. It's just deeper, richer, warmer, happier. 489 00:25:05,720 --> 00:25:06,560 Speaker 2: Yeah, it's sun. 490 00:25:06,880 --> 00:25:09,639 Speaker 3: It's that's everyone's got a different point of view and 491 00:25:09,680 --> 00:25:13,560 Speaker 3: we're all built on different histories and you have to 492 00:25:13,560 --> 00:25:16,760 Speaker 3: take that into consideration when you're talking to somebody, or 493 00:25:16,880 --> 00:25:17,440 Speaker 3: you've got. 494 00:25:17,240 --> 00:25:18,360 Speaker 2: To meet them where they are. 495 00:25:18,760 --> 00:25:21,800 Speaker 3: Yeah, and that's something new that I learned, and I'm 496 00:25:21,880 --> 00:25:25,119 Speaker 3: kind of glad as like has let me sort of 497 00:25:25,160 --> 00:25:26,600 Speaker 3: release a lot of anger. 498 00:25:27,119 --> 00:25:29,520 Speaker 1: Yeah, And I guess the last thing I'll end on 499 00:25:29,520 --> 00:25:31,479 Speaker 1: because I know we got to go, but I just 500 00:25:31,840 --> 00:25:34,200 Speaker 1: was thinking about it when you told you were saying 501 00:25:34,200 --> 00:25:37,280 Speaker 1: the thing to me about social media and just how 502 00:25:37,320 --> 00:25:39,600 Speaker 1: they that's what they want. We keep saying, they like 503 00:25:39,720 --> 00:25:44,800 Speaker 1: whatever is running social media, all, yeah, just be conscious. 504 00:25:44,840 --> 00:25:47,880 Speaker 1: Like That's what I'm starting to realize too, is I'm 505 00:25:47,920 --> 00:25:51,920 Speaker 1: so unconsciously scrolling and taking in information, and I'm trying 506 00:25:51,920 --> 00:25:54,439 Speaker 1: to be more in control of what I'm subconsciously taking in, 507 00:25:54,520 --> 00:25:58,040 Speaker 1: So whether that's meditation or soundbaths or even sitting in 508 00:25:58,080 --> 00:26:00,679 Speaker 1: the bathtub in silence, like trying to make sure that 509 00:26:00,720 --> 00:26:03,040 Speaker 1: I'm doing those things for my nervous system and my 510 00:26:03,040 --> 00:26:06,680 Speaker 1: brain to reset and not just letting someone else control 511 00:26:06,760 --> 00:26:09,080 Speaker 1: me all the time. Like when you change the narrative 512 00:26:09,119 --> 00:26:11,879 Speaker 1: in your brain to that that I'm giving my power 513 00:26:11,920 --> 00:26:16,080 Speaker 1: away through these avenues, It's really interesting what it makes 514 00:26:16,080 --> 00:26:19,600 Speaker 1: you want to do. So, whether you agree with what 515 00:26:19,640 --> 00:26:22,520 Speaker 1: we said or not, maybe just take it into your 516 00:26:22,600 --> 00:26:26,600 Speaker 1: life as some sort of new outlook of I'm going 517 00:26:26,680 --> 00:26:29,080 Speaker 1: to be more conscious of what I'm taking in and 518 00:26:29,840 --> 00:26:32,960 Speaker 1: what I'm digesting, what I'm giving energy to and see 519 00:26:32,960 --> 00:26:35,520 Speaker 1: if that changes your outlook as well, because I'd be 520 00:26:35,560 --> 00:26:39,400 Speaker 1: really curious if we all like limited what we're ingesting 521 00:26:39,440 --> 00:26:42,000 Speaker 1: all the time, if our output would be different too. 522 00:26:43,000 --> 00:26:45,560 Speaker 3: My hot take is that like by twenty thirty we're 523 00:26:45,560 --> 00:26:47,600 Speaker 3: not going to have social media. I just think it's 524 00:26:48,000 --> 00:26:50,080 Speaker 3: that I think it's on the downslide. I think books 525 00:26:50,080 --> 00:26:50,920 Speaker 3: are going to come back. 526 00:26:51,560 --> 00:26:51,800 Speaker 1: Ooh. 527 00:26:52,960 --> 00:26:55,280 Speaker 2: I think books are going to be the new social media. 528 00:26:55,440 --> 00:26:58,359 Speaker 1: Yeah, maybe an audiobook. Even there'll be new ways to 529 00:26:58,400 --> 00:27:00,879 Speaker 1: do it. I told you about that palm reader, and 530 00:27:00,920 --> 00:27:03,119 Speaker 1: Balie told me that even cell phones and stuff are 531 00:27:03,160 --> 00:27:04,520 Speaker 1: going away. And I was like, I mean, she might 532 00:27:04,520 --> 00:27:07,000 Speaker 1: have more been talking about social media, but like access, 533 00:27:07,040 --> 00:27:10,680 Speaker 1: she said, like, we're not gonna want it. Yeah, I'm 534 00:27:10,720 --> 00:27:13,080 Speaker 1: on board. Well, go check out this book. It's called 535 00:27:13,119 --> 00:27:13,679 Speaker 1: Be the Sun. 536 00:27:13,640 --> 00:27:14,120 Speaker 2: Not the Salt. 537 00:27:14,160 --> 00:27:16,760 Speaker 1: I'll put the link in the description of this podcast. 538 00:27:16,800 --> 00:27:18,920 Speaker 1: You can always email us at the Edge at velvet 539 00:27:18,960 --> 00:27:22,080 Speaker 1: sedge dot com. I'm on Instagram at Velvet's Edge Chip. 540 00:27:22,640 --> 00:27:25,879 Speaker 2: I'm at Chip doors its ch I P D O 541 00:27:26,000 --> 00:27:27,040 Speaker 2: R S C H. 542 00:27:27,520 --> 00:27:29,520 Speaker 1: And as you guys go into the weekend and you're 543 00:27:29,560 --> 00:27:32,200 Speaker 1: living on the edge, I hope you always remember too. 544 00:27:32,640 --> 00:27:34,560 Speaker 2: Ad. 545 00:27:35,440 --> 00:27:36,560 Speaker 1: Start acting casual. 546 00:27:37,160 --> 00:27:47,040 Speaker 2: Telesi, let's just act casual. Bye bye.